All language subtitles for Young Sheldon - 02x04 - A Financial Secret and Fish Sauce.AVS-SVA.English.C.orig.Addic7ed.com

For most students, the weekend

represented two days of fun,

freedom, and in the case of my brother,

a chance to ignore all forms of hygiene.

Come on, come on.

To me, however, it represented

an unwelcome break from education.

Whoo! Thank the Lord!

But this wasn't a typical weekend,

because this was the weekend

I got to do my parents' taxes.

Howdy do, W-2.

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"If you were not covered
by a retirement plan,

but your spouse was, see
the worksheet on page 14."

Try and stop me.

Mom, I was going
through our expenditures

and noticed our grocery
bills are up 12% compared

to last quarter. Any idea why?

There's a person at the end of
the table that eats for free.

There's a person at the
other end of the table

that eats for three.

I've been buying groceries
for the church food drive.

I think that's it.

Ooh, I bet I could write that off,

including the gas it took
to drive to the grocery store

and then to the church.

With all that driving,
maybe she can count

her car as a home office.

Sounds aggressive, but I
like how you're thinking.

None of that is necessary,
it's for charity.

What's the point of charity
if there are no tax benefits?

Eat your peas.

I like how he's thinking.

You eat your peas, too.

Dad, banking question.

What's that, buddy?

I noticed there's a check missing.

I have a copy of check 128

and a copy of check
130, but 129 isn't there.

Oh, yeah, don't worry about it.

But I enjoy worrying;
I find it very relaxing.

'Course you do.

I balanced the rest of the account,

and it appears to be a check for $300.

All right, well, let's just put it down

for $300 for miscellaneous.

I've never labeled anything
miscellaneous in my life.

I'll go ask Mom.

Wait.

I just remembered.

I gave the money to a friend.

Who? It doesn't matter who.

Why'd you give it to them?

They needed it. It... it's like charity.

Ooh, another write-off, excellent.

Hey. Hey, hey, hey.

What do you say we keep this quiet?

You mean like a secret?

No, no, just, you know,
something between you and me.

What about Mom?

Mom is on a need-to-know basis.

What if Mom needs to know?

Okay, it's a secret.

Just trust me.

It is better for everyone if
she doesn't know about this.

But I'm not good at keeping secrets.

It's not hard. Just
keep your mouth shut.

But I'm not good at
keeping my mouth shut.

Sheldon, all you got to do is be cool.

"Be cool."

He might as well have asked
me to fly around the backyard.

- Good night, baby.
- Night, Mama.

- Love you.
- Love you, too.

Oh, hello.

I was just brushing my
teeth like I do every night.

Nothing new there.

You all right?

Yes. I'm cool.

I'm very cool.

Tell Sheldon what cool means.

Hush.

Sweet dreams.

Love you.

Love you, too, 'cause you're my mom.

You're so weird.

More than usual?

No, I guess not.

Perfect.

To avoid looking suspicious,

I tried to interact with my
mom as little as possible.

Thankfully, it's rude to
speak with your mouth full.

You look tired, baby. Sleep okay?

Mm-hmm.

So how big a tax refund
you think we're gonna get?

Mm.

- Mornin'.
- Mornin'.

I slept in the nude last night.

Felt every little breeze.

Thank you for sharing that.

You're welcome.

Fight, you cowards, fight!

You fight, Skeletor.

Mare, we got any batteries?!

Look in the drawer by the refrigerator.

There was only so much food I could eat,

so I started avoiding my
mother whenever possible.

What are you doing in there?

Keeping your secret.

You got to pull it together.

This is me pulling it together.

- Pull harder.
- Find 'em?

Yeah. Got 'em. Thanks.

You're very welcome.
Hey, have you noticed

anything off with Sheldon?

Uh, no, no, no. Can't
say that I have. Why?

He's been awful quiet, and, at
the risk of being indelicate,

he's gone several days
without a bowel movement.

How do you know that?

Well, I was worried about him,

so I took a look in his potty journal.

He's still keeping that thing, huh?

Oh, yeah, that's why he
wanted the Polaroid camera.

Uh, well, I'm sure he's gonna be fine,

uh, but I'll keep an eye on him.

- Thank you.
- You got it.

- She's gone.
- Thank you.

Batteries are in this drawer.

We got a problem.

I don't know how much
longer Sheldon can hold out.

This is why I did not
want you to write a check.

Well, I'm sorry, but I didn't have

that kind of cash lying around.

I do not want Mary to
find out about this.

Well, what about Sheldon?

The kid hasn't pooped
in days, he might pop.

Slip a little Metamucil into
his apple juice, he'll be fine.

Why don't we just come clean?

All right, sure, we could do that.

You could rat me out to Mary and...

I could tell her what you
did at the church picnic.

Come on.

Now you're just playing dirty.

We sink or swim together, George.

We sink or swim together.

Grandmas are supposed to be nice.

What went wrong with you?

Avoiding my mother in our own house

was proving to be difficult,

so it was time to get creative.

Hello. I'd like to book
a room in your hotel.

I'd be arriving tonight.

No, it's just me.

Ooh, a queen bed, that sounds fancy.

And how much would this room cost?

Wow. Is that per month?

Per day?

By any chance, do you
have a children's rate?

We've been friends for
a while now, haven't we?

I suppose so.

Given that, how would you
feel about a sleepover?

Sure. Your mom lets you watch TV.

Jake and the Fatman is on tonight.

I meant we could sleep at your house.

But you'll miss Jake and the Fatman.

Even better. So what do you say?

I'll have to ask my mom.

Well, be sure to tell her
I'm clean, I'm well-behaved,

and if you don't have a lot of room,

I can fit in really tight spaces.

So your first sleepover.

Pretty exciting, huh?

No. It's not exciting,
it's constipating,

and I'm only doing it to avoid Mom.

But still, it's your first sleepover.

It's fun stuff.

Okay, I know you're having
a tough time with this,

but... you're doing great.

You spend some time at Tam's house,

you know, clear your head,
and come back home refreshed.

And then I can tell Mom?

Oh, no, you can never tell Mom.

Wouldn't it be easier to just be honest?

Usually, it would be, but...

sometimes the truth can hurt people.

We wouldn't want to hurt Mom, right?

Of course not.

Attaboy.

Hey, here's a funny
prank you can try tonight.

When Tam falls asleep, put
some shaving cream in his hand

and then tickle his nose.

Why?

'Cause then he'll go to,

you know, scratch his nose,

and he gets shaving cream on his face.

And then what?

Well... that-that's it.

But I'm a guest in their home,

and that doesn't seem
like a very good way

to repay their kindness.

Never mind.

And what if the shaving
cream gets in his eyes?

That would sting.

Sorry I mentioned it.

Also, I didn't bring
my own shaving cream.

I'd have to use his dad's, and that...

Forget it!

Hello.

Hi. You must be Mrs....

Tam's mom.

I'm Sheldon's dad, George Cooper.

Nice to meet you.

Thanks for letting him spend the night.

It's his first sleepover. He's excited.

Actually, I'm quite apprehens...

He's really looking forward to it.

Uh, in case something

comes up, just give us a holler.

I mean, a call. If you
hollered, we wouldn't hear you.

That-that was a joke.

Ha-ha-ha!

Okay, buddy, have fun.

Visiting Tam's house

for the first time was an
emotional roller coaster.

For example, it's traditional
in Vietnamese homes

to have gruesome religious
iconography near the entrance.

I did not like that.

However, it's also customary

to not wear shoes around the house

for sanitary reasons.

I did like that.

Interestingly,

one of the main ingredients
in Vietnamese cooking

is an extremely pungent
condiment known as fish sauce.

I did not like that.

But before every meal,

it's common for everyone to
wash their hands and face.

I did like that.

Forks are not customary
in a Vietnamese household.

I did not like that.

And instead of napkins,
there was one towel

for everyone to share at the table.

Seriously, what are they thinking?

I can't help thinking how odd it is

that Shelly volunteered
to go on a sleepover.

Oh, I don't know.

Hmm? He's growing up.

It's natural for a young boy
to want to spread his wings

a little bit, try something new.

That's nonsense.

Last week, I brought home

the Raisin Bran with
the sugar on the raisins.

He almost lost his mind.

If you ask me,

you're worried about nothing.

Maybe it's me.

Maybe I did something to upset him.

What are you talking about?

He loves you

like crazy.

Much more than he loves this one.

It's true.

I don't know.

I just feel like something isn't right.

Mom!

I got my hair stuck in my zipper!

That's the kid you need
to be worried about.

Okay, Connie, why don't
we just come clean?

- No.
- You heard her.

Now she's blaming herself.

And Sheldon's so upset

he's-he's acting like a regular kid.

- All right, let's tell her.
- Thank you.

But first I'm gonna tell her
what you did at the picnic.

- Oh, Mary!
- Okay, okay, shh.

I don't know how much longer
we can keep this going.

I'm willing to find out.

So, this game is called
Mystic Warlords of Ka'a.

It's pretty fun.

There are six kinds
of secret warlords...

- Secret warlords.
- It's a secret. Secret.

It's a secret.

Have you noticed
anything off with Sheldon?

Something between me and you.

Mom is on a need-to-know basis.

I took a little look
in his potty journal.

- It's a secret.
- Several days without a bowel movement.

- Sheldon.
- Secret. Secret.

- A secret.
- Sheldon.

Did you hear anything I said?

Sorry, I was reliving
a traumatic experience.

What do you mean?

Tam, I have a secret
that's weighing on me,

and I need to tell someone.

Okay. Tell me.

But I promised I wouldn't.

Okay. Then don't.

But it's driving me crazy.

Too bad you're not Catholic.

You could confess it to a priest.

That's a great idea.

You're Catholic. I'll confess it to you.

I'm not a priest.

I'm not a Catholic.

It makes perfect sense.

Okay, whenever you're ready.

What are you doing?

I'm assuming the position.

Okay.

Forgive me, Tam, for I have sinned.

This is my first confession.

I forgive you, my son.

I was doing my parents' taxes
and noticed a check was missing.

- I asked my father about it...
- As I walked Tam

through the whole sordid affair,

I could feel a weight
lifting off my shoulders.

It was a relief to
finally unburden myself

of this deception.

By the time I reached the end,

I felt like a new person.

That's the whole story.

Cool. Can we play now?

And now that my conscience
had been cleared,

my colon was ready to do the same.

Excuse me. I need to use your bathroom!

Thank you for letting
me sleep in your bed.

My father taught me that we
must always honor our guests

and treat them with the utmost courtesy.

The Vietnamese are a
very welcoming people.

Yeah, that hasn't
always worked out for us.

Do you think your dad would ever ask you

to keep a secret from your mom?

Oh, no.

He's so honest, it's annoying.

Enough talking.

Sleep now.

She's just annoying.

Well, you did it.

How was your first sleepover?

They feed you any weird food?

When I was in 'Nam, we ate
fish soup for breakfast.

Sheldon, I'm talking to you.

Well, I'm not talking to you.

Okay, what's going on?

After having my first good
night's sleep in a week,

I woke up with a fresh perspective.

And that is...?

It was irresponsible of you

to burden me with that secret.

Sheldon, we've been through this.

It's complicated.

While I may not look up to you
from an intellectual standpoint,

I've always looked up
to you as a role model.

I can't do that anymore.

And don't worry... We made a deal.

I'll continue to keep your secret.

Hey.

What's up?

Um, I need to tell you something.

What did you do?

When Sheldon was doing our taxes,

he noticed a missing check.

What did you do?

Before I answer, do you trust me enough

to understand it was for a good reason

and j-just leave it at that?

What did you do?

It's all your mother's
fault. She is a bad person.

I've been telling you for years.

What did you do?

Okay, now, before I answer that...

Just tell me what you did.

I got a DWI.

Mom!

It's not as bad as it sounds.

How is driving drunk not bad?

I wasn't exactly driving.

I don't follow.

I was at the dog track with Georgie,

and I had a few...

Georgie?

With God as my witness,

I've never been to the
dog track in my life.

She knows.

Oh, I've been there a bunch.

Will someone please
tell me what happened?

Okay, me and Meemaw were
in the bar at the track...

You took him to a bar?

He wasn't drinking.

She had a few too many margaritas,

so I drove us home.

But you don't have a license.

That's why we swapped places
after the cop pulled us over.

Oh, dear Lord.

I had nothing to do with this part.

- Shut up.
- Will do.

I didn't want Georgie

to get into trouble,

so I got behind the wheel

before the cop walked up.

And then I got arrested, and, uh,

he bailed me out.

So you all thought you
should keep this from me?

- Absolutely.
- 100%.

Okay, here's what's gonna happen: you

and you are staying at her house

until I say otherwise.

One could argue I was
the hero in this story.

You went gambling and you
drove without a license

and you lied to my face.

Heroically.

Go.

I love everything about this.

I'm guessing you're mad at me.

Aw, forget about it.

I appreciate you not...

ratting me out about the picnic.

Well, we had a deal.

Besides, your marriage is
already hanging by a thread.

It is dangling there.

All right, well, I'm gonna turn in.

Mmm.

Good night.

Night!

Hello?

So, get a load of this.

Last church picnic, your husband

snuck in a six-pack,

polished off the whole thing,

then went to wait in
line for the bathroom...

Hey.

You got an extra toothbrush?

Under the sink, darlin'.

Thanks.

You got it.

So then the big gorilla decides
he doesn't want to wait in line,

so he stumbles over to
the church vegetable garden

and proceeds to irrigate
the whole damn thing.

I've eaten those vegetables.

Sweet dreams.

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