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Would you like to inspect the original subtitles? These are the user uploaded subtitles that are being translated: 1 00:00:00,226 --> 00:00:01,967 Previously on Young Sheldon... 2 00:00:01,970 --> 00:00:03,944 - Here we are. - What is this? 3 00:00:03,947 --> 00:00:05,110 The dorm room. 4 00:00:05,113 --> 00:00:06,751 It's all yours. 5 00:00:06,753 --> 00:00:09,278 Now you can study, take naps, do whatever you want. 6 00:00:09,281 --> 00:00:10,585 No one's living here? 7 00:00:10,587 --> 00:00:12,765 Well, we had an Indian exchange student, 8 00:00:12,768 --> 00:00:14,631 but he developed a taste for barbecue, 9 00:00:14,634 --> 00:00:17,056 so his parents made him go home. 10 00:00:17,059 --> 00:00:19,234 Wait, he has a room here and at school? 11 00:00:19,236 --> 00:00:22,097 You have your own room. I never had that growing up. 12 00:00:22,100 --> 00:00:24,795 And then I was in the barracks, and then I married your mother. 13 00:00:24,798 --> 00:00:25,797 Dang. 14 00:00:25,800 --> 00:00:26,952 Yeah, tell me about it. 15 00:00:26,955 --> 00:00:28,971 What happened to appreciating what you have? 16 00:00:28,974 --> 00:00:30,713 Yeah, yeah, blah, blah, blah. 17 00:00:30,716 --> 00:00:32,973 - Wait, you have a single? - Uh-huh. 18 00:00:32,976 --> 00:00:34,411 And you don't even sleep here? 19 00:00:34,414 --> 00:00:35,633 Well, sometimes I take naps, 20 00:00:35,636 --> 00:00:37,682 but that mattress is lumpy, lumpy. 21 00:00:39,216 --> 00:00:41,229 I was learning to enjoy 22 00:00:41,232 --> 00:00:43,395 the perks of university life, 23 00:00:43,398 --> 00:00:46,095 including a dorm to study and nap in. 24 00:00:46,097 --> 00:00:48,143 And since this was college, 25 00:00:48,145 --> 00:00:51,112 I was even allowed to have girls in my room. 26 00:00:51,115 --> 00:00:53,317 Here we go. Nice and clean. 27 00:00:53,320 --> 00:00:55,381 Did you use the unscented detergent? 28 00:00:55,384 --> 00:00:57,518 You've got a nose. Sniff it yourself. 29 00:00:59,207 --> 00:01:01,383 I even had my own bathroom, 30 00:01:01,392 --> 00:01:03,292 which gave me the perfect place to store 31 00:01:03,295 --> 00:01:05,170 my impressive collection of sunscreens 32 00:01:05,173 --> 00:01:06,608 and bug repellents. 33 00:01:06,611 --> 00:01:09,831 However, one thing I would never get used to 34 00:01:09,834 --> 00:01:14,114 was college students' love of blasting rock and roll music. 35 00:01:33,180 --> 00:01:34,847 Uh, who are you? 36 00:01:34,850 --> 00:01:36,301 I'm in the room next door. 37 00:01:36,305 --> 00:01:37,695 Oh, you're that smart kid. 38 00:01:37,698 --> 00:01:38,786 Who is it? 39 00:01:38,789 --> 00:01:39,867 That smart kid. 40 00:01:39,871 --> 00:01:41,567 - Tell him to come in. - Want to come in? 41 00:01:41,569 --> 00:01:44,007 - No, I'm here to complain. - He's here to complain. 42 00:01:44,009 --> 00:01:45,882 - Then don't let him in. - You can't come in. 43 00:01:45,884 --> 00:01:48,757 I'm trying to study, and your loud music is very distracting. 44 00:01:48,759 --> 00:01:50,727 - You mean the game? - "The game"? 45 00:01:50,729 --> 00:01:53,135 I'm not up on today's one-named pop stars. 46 00:01:53,139 --> 00:01:54,486 No. It's a video game. 47 00:01:54,490 --> 00:01:56,098 You have video games? 48 00:01:56,102 --> 00:01:57,442 A bunch. You play? 49 00:01:57,445 --> 00:02:00,055 My meemaw and I beat Quest of Adeera. 50 00:02:00,058 --> 00:02:01,492 Dude, this kid beat Adeera. 51 00:02:01,495 --> 00:02:03,587 - Well, tell him to come in. - Come in. 52 00:02:06,194 --> 00:02:08,502 - Hello. - What's up, homey? 53 00:02:10,421 --> 00:02:12,508 Why do you have a Rosetta stone poster? 54 00:02:12,509 --> 00:02:14,555 - Linguistics major. - Hmm. 55 00:02:14,556 --> 00:02:16,558 Sit. You can play next. 56 00:02:16,561 --> 00:02:18,045 So, how old are you? 57 00:02:18,048 --> 00:02:19,134 Twelve. 58 00:02:19,138 --> 00:02:20,399 - Damn. - And they let you 59 00:02:20,401 --> 00:02:21,618 live here by yourself? 60 00:02:21,622 --> 00:02:23,674 That room's just for during the day to study. 61 00:02:23,676 --> 00:02:25,287 Didn't I see some lady in there? 62 00:02:25,289 --> 00:02:26,668 That must've been my mom. 63 00:02:26,670 --> 00:02:28,229 Dude, his mom is hot. 64 00:02:28,233 --> 00:02:30,475 What is wrong with you? Don't listen to him. 65 00:02:30,478 --> 00:02:32,567 He thinks any female with a pulse is hot. 66 00:02:32,570 --> 00:02:33,788 I don't think your mom is hot. 67 00:02:33,792 --> 00:02:35,924 Congratulations, you're more mature than him. 68 00:02:35,926 --> 00:02:38,406 Don't feel bad. I'm more mature than most people. 69 00:02:38,409 --> 00:02:40,762 You're up. 70 00:02:42,127 --> 00:02:44,781 Grown-ups and the elderly had always liked me, 71 00:02:44,783 --> 00:02:47,438 and now I had won over undergrads. 72 00:02:47,441 --> 00:02:49,091 Like a beloved board game, 73 00:02:49,094 --> 00:02:52,324 I'm fun for ages nine to 90. 74 00:03:03,533 --> 00:03:09,901 - Synced and corrected by VitoSilans - -- www.Addic7ed.com -- 75 00:03:14,473 --> 00:03:17,003 Oh, look at these prices. 76 00:03:17,006 --> 00:03:19,272 I could make this dress for Missy. 77 00:03:19,276 --> 00:03:20,887 Meemaw, make her stop. 78 00:03:20,889 --> 00:03:24,030 Come on, Mary. You already got one kid that gets picked on. 79 00:03:25,110 --> 00:03:27,057 Oh, cute. 80 00:03:27,061 --> 00:03:29,217 Oh, it's a little short. 81 00:03:29,221 --> 00:03:30,569 It's supposed to be this length. 82 00:03:30,573 --> 00:03:31,877 It's adorable. 83 00:03:31,881 --> 00:03:32,968 Thank you. 84 00:03:32,972 --> 00:03:34,176 Does it come down any? 85 00:03:34,179 --> 00:03:35,258 Mom. 86 00:03:35,260 --> 00:03:36,921 Come on, Mary, it's fine. 87 00:03:36,925 --> 00:03:39,139 Well, you're not getting it. 88 00:03:39,141 --> 00:03:40,923 All my friends dress like this. 89 00:03:40,925 --> 00:03:44,413 Arms by your sides. I want to measure. 90 00:03:45,247 --> 00:03:48,465 See? It's shorter than your fingertips. 91 00:03:48,468 --> 00:03:49,716 What the hell is happening? 92 00:03:49,719 --> 00:03:52,158 - She wants to ruin my life. - The school dress code 93 00:03:52,162 --> 00:03:55,311 says that all bottoms must extend past the fingertips. 94 00:03:55,313 --> 00:03:57,408 It's close enough, and they don't even check. 95 00:03:57,411 --> 00:03:59,199 Well, I am not wasting good money 96 00:03:59,203 --> 00:04:01,250 on something that you can't wear to school. 97 00:04:01,252 --> 00:04:02,906 Then I'll wear it on weekends. 98 00:04:02,908 --> 00:04:04,818 Go try on something else. 99 00:04:06,651 --> 00:04:09,606 I'll get it for her. I don't mind wasting my money. 100 00:04:09,610 --> 00:04:11,483 Please? 101 00:04:11,485 --> 00:04:12,697 Fine. 102 00:04:12,699 --> 00:04:14,284 But you are not wearing it to school, 103 00:04:14,288 --> 00:04:16,154 and you are not wearing it without tights. 104 00:04:16,158 --> 00:04:17,201 Love you. 105 00:04:17,204 --> 00:04:19,207 Hey, I'm the one paying for it. 106 00:04:19,211 --> 00:04:20,386 Love you more. 107 00:04:20,389 --> 00:04:22,699 Hear that? 108 00:04:26,137 --> 00:04:27,879 - Hey, Tom. You wanted to see me? - Yeah. 109 00:04:27,882 --> 00:04:29,792 Why don't you shut the door and have a seat. 110 00:04:29,795 --> 00:04:31,187 The door? 111 00:04:31,189 --> 00:04:32,933 This can't be good. 112 00:04:35,286 --> 00:04:37,812 Uh, look, 113 00:04:37,814 --> 00:04:41,098 you know your team didn't have a great year. 114 00:04:41,100 --> 00:04:42,913 - I'm aware. - I'm aware, 115 00:04:42,915 --> 00:04:45,398 too, 'cause I've been hearing about it everywhere. 116 00:04:45,401 --> 00:04:47,816 The grocery store, gas station, 117 00:04:47,819 --> 00:04:48,954 barbershop. 118 00:04:48,956 --> 00:04:51,841 And I'm only in there, like, 30 seconds, George. 119 00:04:51,843 --> 00:04:53,319 I know people are upset, 120 00:04:53,322 --> 00:04:55,478 - but we're gonna turn things around. - Look, 121 00:04:55,480 --> 00:04:56,917 I'm on your side. 122 00:04:56,920 --> 00:05:00,752 But you should know the boosters got pitchforks out. 123 00:05:00,754 --> 00:05:03,882 Not literally, but Charlie Dean owns 124 00:05:03,884 --> 00:05:05,887 that feed store, so... 125 00:05:05,891 --> 00:05:07,841 - Are you saying I'm losing my job? - No. 126 00:05:07,843 --> 00:05:09,846 No, no, I'm saying 127 00:05:09,850 --> 00:05:11,896 you just got some fires to put out. 128 00:05:11,899 --> 00:05:14,656 - Well, what am I supposedto do? - Talk to the boosters. 129 00:05:14,658 --> 00:05:16,634 Tell 'em something encouraging. 130 00:05:16,637 --> 00:05:18,826 Yeah. Got it. 131 00:05:18,829 --> 00:05:21,680 And say it like your job depends on it. 132 00:05:22,711 --> 00:05:24,192 Not that it does. 133 00:05:25,288 --> 00:05:26,942 But it does. 134 00:05:28,908 --> 00:05:31,156 Watch out for the CyberToad. 135 00:05:31,158 --> 00:05:34,077 - What's a CyberToad? - The evil little robot frogs. 136 00:05:34,081 --> 00:05:36,829 Although they're only known as CyberToads in the west. 137 00:05:36,831 --> 00:05:39,175 - In Japan they're known as... - MechaGamas. 138 00:05:39,178 --> 00:05:40,834 Can I finish my own thoughts, please? 139 00:05:40,836 --> 00:05:42,360 He's very sensitive. 140 00:05:42,370 --> 00:05:45,170 I'm protective of my fun facts, too. 141 00:05:45,173 --> 00:05:47,117 I'm hungry. You wanna order something? 142 00:05:47,120 --> 00:05:49,808 - Chinese? - Little man, you want Chinese? 143 00:05:49,812 --> 00:05:52,860 - I don't know. I've never had Chinese food. - Really? 144 00:05:52,863 --> 00:05:54,637 We get it, like, two, three times a week. 145 00:05:54,639 --> 00:05:56,350 Chinese food three times a week? 146 00:05:56,353 --> 00:05:57,617 That seems excessive. 147 00:05:57,620 --> 00:05:59,550 How have you never had an egg roll? 148 00:05:59,553 --> 00:06:01,569 Mom, can I please be picked up later? 149 00:06:01,572 --> 00:06:04,315 No. Your meemaw's already on her way. 150 00:06:04,319 --> 00:06:06,800 But the people next door want me to try an egg roll. 151 00:06:06,802 --> 00:06:07,994 What people? 152 00:06:07,997 --> 00:06:09,261 Don't take food from strangers. 153 00:06:09,264 --> 00:06:11,353 They're not strangers. They're Oscar and Darren. 154 00:06:11,356 --> 00:06:13,555 Well, they're strangers to me. 155 00:06:13,557 --> 00:06:15,464 Well, maybe when Meemaw gets here, 156 00:06:15,468 --> 00:06:17,252 she can wait in the car for a few hours. 157 00:06:17,255 --> 00:06:19,761 That is not happening, and you know it. 158 00:06:19,764 --> 00:06:21,865 Can we at least have Chinese food for dinner? 159 00:06:21,867 --> 00:06:23,233 I'm making Rice-A-Roni. 160 00:06:23,237 --> 00:06:26,199 - Does that count? - Nothing Chinese ends in "a-roni." 161 00:06:26,201 --> 00:06:27,771 Well, their loss. 162 00:06:31,184 --> 00:06:33,293 Oh, I know that face. 163 00:06:33,295 --> 00:06:35,901 Heartburn? Gas? What are we working with? 164 00:06:35,904 --> 00:06:37,473 Not in the mood, Wayne. 165 00:06:37,476 --> 00:06:40,079 Are you in the mood for Tums? I could hook you up. 166 00:06:41,889 --> 00:06:43,620 Apparently, the football boosters think 167 00:06:43,624 --> 00:06:45,216 I'm not doing my job. 168 00:06:45,218 --> 00:06:47,449 Just 'cause they give a little money to the team... 169 00:06:47,452 --> 00:06:48,622 A lot of money. 170 00:06:48,625 --> 00:06:50,994 They give some amount of money to the team. 171 00:06:50,997 --> 00:06:52,284 And the new scoreboard. 172 00:06:52,288 --> 00:06:56,122 Okay. But I-I give my time, my talent, my sweat. 173 00:06:56,125 --> 00:06:58,646 You see any boosters out there doing two-a-day summer practice? 174 00:06:58,649 --> 00:07:00,367 - I do not. - Damn right. 175 00:07:00,370 --> 00:07:01,913 If they really want to help, you know what they could do? 176 00:07:01,915 --> 00:07:03,483 Give birth to stronger, faster kids, 177 00:07:03,485 --> 00:07:04,790 'cause theirs ain't cutting it. 178 00:07:04,793 --> 00:07:07,713 You know you're gonna have to talk to them, right? 179 00:07:07,716 --> 00:07:09,935 Yes. 180 00:07:09,939 --> 00:07:13,119 And you know you can't say that stuff about their kids, right? 181 00:07:13,122 --> 00:07:16,824 Well, what if it comes up organically? 182 00:07:16,827 --> 00:07:18,874 Maybe I should come. 183 00:07:18,877 --> 00:07:22,004 I'm not gonna insult their children. 184 00:07:22,005 --> 00:07:23,310 You sure? 185 00:07:23,312 --> 00:07:24,778 Okay, come. 186 00:07:31,605 --> 00:07:33,985 - Where's the coffee? - I finished it. 187 00:07:33,988 --> 00:07:36,812 When you finish a pot, you're supposed to make more. 188 00:07:36,814 --> 00:07:38,463 Oh, is that the rule? 189 00:07:38,466 --> 00:07:40,223 It is for him. 190 00:07:40,225 --> 00:07:41,615 Why are you reading my paper? 191 00:07:41,617 --> 00:07:44,615 Well, pardon me for keeping up on events of the day. 192 00:07:44,617 --> 00:07:48,391 - Tomorrow's headline: Father Strangles Son. - Good luck. 193 00:07:48,394 --> 00:07:50,827 My horoscope says "things are looking up." 194 00:07:52,100 --> 00:07:54,360 Well, don't you look nice. 195 00:07:54,363 --> 00:07:56,534 Nice and boring, thanks to you. 196 00:07:56,538 --> 00:07:58,752 Is everyone gonna be crabby today? 197 00:07:58,755 --> 00:08:00,187 I've been a delight. 198 00:08:00,190 --> 00:08:02,014 Dad, can we just leave? 199 00:08:02,017 --> 00:08:03,624 I haven't had my coffee yet. 200 00:08:03,627 --> 00:08:04,841 I'll give you a ride. 201 00:08:04,845 --> 00:08:06,363 Thanks. 202 00:08:06,367 --> 00:08:07,819 Where are the damn filters? 203 00:08:07,822 --> 00:08:10,776 They're in the cabinet, where they always are. 204 00:08:10,778 --> 00:08:13,254 These two, fighting like the Serbs and Croatians 205 00:08:13,257 --> 00:08:14,475 in Bosnia. 206 00:08:19,528 --> 00:08:21,091 Mom make you wear that? 207 00:08:21,093 --> 00:08:22,355 Yeah. 208 00:08:22,358 --> 00:08:25,125 She did the same thing to me with pleated khakis. 209 00:08:25,129 --> 00:08:27,343 I looked like Pastor Jeff. 210 00:08:27,346 --> 00:08:30,048 Well, she doesn't know that I brought a change. 211 00:08:30,050 --> 00:08:31,226 Good for you. 212 00:08:31,230 --> 00:08:34,096 - I tried cutting the khakis into shorts. - Did it help? 213 00:08:34,099 --> 00:08:36,190 No. I looked like Sheldon. 214 00:08:36,192 --> 00:08:38,625 That's tragic. 215 00:08:38,628 --> 00:08:41,190 You never get any glory without a little pain. 216 00:08:41,192 --> 00:08:43,668 I know we've had our share lately, 217 00:08:43,672 --> 00:08:46,105 but we've got the pieces in place for next year. 218 00:08:46,109 --> 00:08:49,496 With your support, we're gonna make it happen. 219 00:08:49,500 --> 00:08:52,488 I think we can agree that our boys are in good hands here. 220 00:08:52,490 --> 00:08:56,009 So thanks for coming out. Go, Wolves. 221 00:08:56,013 --> 00:08:57,357 I got a question. 222 00:08:57,360 --> 00:09:00,392 - Go ahead, Roy. - That game against Tyler. 223 00:09:00,394 --> 00:09:03,130 What in the hell were you thinking 224 00:09:03,134 --> 00:09:05,783 punting with a minute 24 on the clock? 225 00:09:05,785 --> 00:09:07,307 That's a fair question. 226 00:09:10,125 --> 00:09:11,687 Sure is. 227 00:09:11,690 --> 00:09:13,306 That was a tough one. 228 00:09:13,308 --> 00:09:15,186 But our offense was giving up 30 pounds 229 00:09:15,188 --> 00:09:16,751 to everyone across the line. 230 00:09:16,754 --> 00:09:21,434 And we had a quarterback who had an uneasy relationship 231 00:09:21,437 --> 00:09:25,394 with... with holding onto the ball. 232 00:09:26,027 --> 00:09:27,623 So you're blaming our kids? 233 00:09:27,625 --> 00:09:28,624 - Well... - No. 234 00:09:28,626 --> 00:09:29,624 - No? - No. 235 00:09:29,626 --> 00:09:30,727 No. 236 00:09:30,730 --> 00:09:32,609 Look, they're great kids. A lot of heart. 237 00:09:32,611 --> 00:09:34,847 They were getting killed out there. 238 00:09:34,850 --> 00:09:37,196 It's a coach's job to know when to pull back. 239 00:09:37,198 --> 00:09:39,115 So your strategy is to surrender. 240 00:09:39,118 --> 00:09:41,347 - That's not what I'm saying. - You know who don't surrender? 241 00:09:41,350 --> 00:09:43,304 That new coach they got up at Carthage. 242 00:09:43,307 --> 00:09:45,466 - You know he played for the Packers. - Mm-hmm. 243 00:09:45,470 --> 00:09:47,423 Oh, come on. He played for two minutes 244 00:09:47,427 --> 00:09:49,381 and broke his collarbone, and that was his career. 245 00:09:49,384 --> 00:09:51,116 Well, that's two minutes more than you played. 246 00:09:53,250 --> 00:09:54,590 Help me. 247 00:09:55,942 --> 00:09:58,442 Vince Lombardi never played for the pros. 248 00:09:58,445 --> 00:10:00,269 So now this clown is Vince Lombardi? 249 00:10:02,869 --> 00:10:05,292 I'm not Lombardi, but I don't need to put up with this crap. 250 00:10:05,294 --> 00:10:07,267 Wait, what I think we're all seeing 251 00:10:07,269 --> 00:10:08,288 is the passion 252 00:10:08,291 --> 00:10:10,482 - that Coach Cooper brings to the field. - No, what you're seeing 253 00:10:10,485 --> 00:10:12,946 is me running out of patience. Meeting's over. 254 00:10:12,948 --> 00:10:14,642 Oh, there it is. 255 00:10:14,644 --> 00:10:16,948 The Cooper Surrender. 256 00:10:16,951 --> 00:10:19,644 - The Cooper Surrender! - Bye-bye. 257 00:10:40,874 --> 00:10:42,619 What's the matter? 258 00:10:42,621 --> 00:10:44,576 Everything. 259 00:10:44,578 --> 00:10:46,144 Did somebody die? 260 00:10:47,037 --> 00:10:48,383 No. 261 00:10:48,385 --> 00:10:50,253 Then we can fix it. 262 00:10:50,255 --> 00:10:53,687 Come on. Come on. 263 00:10:53,691 --> 00:10:55,765 I was wearing the new skirt, 264 00:10:55,769 --> 00:10:57,611 and I felt really good. 265 00:10:57,615 --> 00:10:59,105 Cute skirt. 266 00:10:59,109 --> 00:11:00,541 Thanks. 267 00:11:00,543 --> 00:11:03,282 Your legs are so hairy. 268 00:11:04,119 --> 00:11:06,464 - Ew. - Gross. 269 00:11:06,466 --> 00:11:09,812 - Those bitches. - Thank you. 270 00:11:09,815 --> 00:11:12,658 Is that why you got on sweat pants? 271 00:11:12,662 --> 00:11:14,796 It gets worse. 272 00:11:14,798 --> 00:11:16,169 Oh, boy. 273 00:11:16,173 --> 00:11:19,190 I came home, and I was in the bathroom, 274 00:11:19,192 --> 00:11:21,624 and I saw Mom's leg razor. 275 00:11:21,626 --> 00:11:23,232 Oh, no. Please tell me 276 00:11:23,235 --> 00:11:24,798 you also saw shaving cream. 277 00:11:24,802 --> 00:11:26,972 - I didn't. - Soap? 278 00:11:26,975 --> 00:11:30,147 Water? Lotion? 279 00:11:30,149 --> 00:11:31,671 Anything? 280 00:11:37,003 --> 00:11:38,687 Hey, it's Darren. 281 00:11:41,421 --> 00:11:42,635 Hello. 282 00:11:42,639 --> 00:11:44,724 Any chance you play Dungeons and Dragons? 283 00:11:44,726 --> 00:11:46,966 And how. I once created a campaign 284 00:11:46,969 --> 00:11:50,024 set in 1940s London where Alan Turing was a character, 285 00:11:50,028 --> 00:11:52,024 and I had the mathematicians be magic users 286 00:11:52,028 --> 00:11:53,706 with theorems instead of spells. 287 00:11:53,710 --> 00:11:55,099 The intelligence officers were clerics... 288 00:11:55,100 --> 00:11:57,067 "Yes" works. We're playing tonight and we're down 289 00:11:57,071 --> 00:11:58,558 a magic user. You in? 290 00:11:58,562 --> 00:11:59,727 When are you playing? 291 00:11:59,730 --> 00:12:01,758 We start at 7:00. We'll go till whenever. 292 00:12:01,760 --> 00:12:03,817 My mom didn't let me stay past 6:00 yesterday. 293 00:12:03,820 --> 00:12:06,601 - She'll never let me stay till "whenever." - Bummer. 294 00:12:06,605 --> 00:12:08,647 Mm. You could play at my house. 295 00:12:08,649 --> 00:12:10,908 - No. - Bummer. 296 00:12:10,910 --> 00:12:12,995 I've never said that before. Did it sound cool? 297 00:12:12,998 --> 00:12:15,432 - No. - Bummer. 298 00:12:20,722 --> 00:12:23,460 Oh, before you open that, could you pick up Sheldon 299 00:12:23,462 --> 00:12:25,807 - so I can get dinner on? - Do I have to? 300 00:12:25,811 --> 00:12:29,284 I'm sorry. I guess I'll do all the parenting around here. 301 00:12:29,288 --> 00:12:32,415 I'm having a hell of a day. Can I get five minutes' peace? 302 00:12:32,418 --> 00:12:34,551 When do I get five minutes' peace? 303 00:12:34,553 --> 00:12:37,663 Honestly, can you just take this one thing off my plate? 304 00:12:41,951 --> 00:12:43,340 Hello? 305 00:12:43,342 --> 00:12:45,481 Dad, my friends are playing Dungeons and Dragons. 306 00:12:45,485 --> 00:12:47,221 Can I please stay the night in my dorm room? 307 00:12:47,224 --> 00:12:48,711 I promise it's safe. 308 00:12:48,715 --> 00:12:50,582 Fine with me. 309 00:12:50,586 --> 00:12:52,799 Thank you. Bye. 310 00:12:52,802 --> 00:12:54,844 That was easy. 311 00:12:54,846 --> 00:12:56,445 - Who was that? - Sheldon. 312 00:12:56,447 --> 00:12:58,052 He's gonna stay the night in his dorm. 313 00:12:58,054 --> 00:13:00,307 Why would you let him do that? 314 00:13:00,309 --> 00:13:01,480 One more thing off your plate. 315 00:13:06,673 --> 00:13:07,875 You did not just tell our son 316 00:13:07,876 --> 00:13:10,102 that he could stay the night by himself. 317 00:13:10,105 --> 00:13:12,962 The campus is safe, and he's not by himself, he's with friends. 318 00:13:12,966 --> 00:13:14,923 Friends that we don't know. 319 00:13:14,927 --> 00:13:16,440 What if there is alcohol? 320 00:13:16,442 --> 00:13:18,409 Then they're gonna get a lot of fun facts 321 00:13:18,413 --> 00:13:20,196 about the history of fermented beverages. 322 00:13:20,198 --> 00:13:22,024 I am serious. 323 00:13:22,028 --> 00:13:23,653 So am I. How else would I know 324 00:13:23,655 --> 00:13:25,249 that monkeys get drunk by eating rotten fruit 325 00:13:25,250 --> 00:13:26,510 off the jungle floor? 326 00:13:26,514 --> 00:13:29,515 He is not ready for this kind of situation. 327 00:13:29,519 --> 00:13:31,085 Mary, he's a good kid. 328 00:13:31,087 --> 00:13:32,788 He's not gonna drink anything he shouldn't. 329 00:13:32,792 --> 00:13:34,400 And if he cared about peer pressure, 330 00:13:34,403 --> 00:13:35,578 he wouldn't wear a bow tie. 331 00:13:37,956 --> 00:13:39,956 I don't know. I don't think I should. 332 00:13:39,960 --> 00:13:41,611 It's just root beer. 333 00:13:41,615 --> 00:13:44,542 This late in the evening, my mother wouldn't approve. 334 00:13:44,544 --> 00:13:45,815 Okay. 335 00:13:45,817 --> 00:13:47,652 Then again, I didn't think they'd let me stay, 336 00:13:47,654 --> 00:13:50,134 - and they did, so maybe it's fine. - I know, 337 00:13:50,136 --> 00:13:53,184 - why don't you roll for it? - Ooh, good idea. 338 00:13:54,786 --> 00:13:56,790 Seventeen. Guess I'll have it. 339 00:13:59,540 --> 00:14:00,801 We playing? 340 00:14:00,803 --> 00:14:02,708 Hold on. Do you have a coaster? 341 00:14:02,711 --> 00:14:04,841 Yeah, it's in the china cabinet. 342 00:14:04,844 --> 00:14:07,181 And where would that be? 343 00:14:09,546 --> 00:14:11,894 You're good at Band-Aids. 344 00:14:11,897 --> 00:14:14,638 I've had practice on Sheldon. 345 00:14:14,639 --> 00:14:16,856 He's a fragile boy. 346 00:14:16,859 --> 00:14:20,097 - I don't want to go back to school tomorrow. - You have to! 347 00:14:20,100 --> 00:14:22,599 You can't let them win. 348 00:14:22,601 --> 00:14:24,124 But wear pants. 349 00:14:24,126 --> 00:14:25,518 This is hard to look at. 350 00:14:25,520 --> 00:14:27,436 I heard women in Europe don't shave. 351 00:14:27,438 --> 00:14:29,004 Maybe I should move there. 352 00:14:29,006 --> 00:14:30,700 They also drink warm beer. 353 00:14:30,702 --> 00:14:32,443 They don't know what they're doing. 354 00:14:33,577 --> 00:14:35,547 Will you show me how to do it the right way? 355 00:14:35,549 --> 00:14:37,376 Shave? Yeah. 356 00:14:37,379 --> 00:14:39,683 Drink? Your dad's the expert. 357 00:14:39,687 --> 00:14:41,212 Boys have it so easy. 358 00:14:41,216 --> 00:14:43,072 They can be as hairy as they want. 359 00:14:43,076 --> 00:14:44,924 Yeah, but they gotta walk around being dumb 360 00:14:44,927 --> 00:14:46,198 and smelly all the time. 361 00:14:46,201 --> 00:14:47,363 Who wants that? 362 00:14:47,365 --> 00:14:48,761 So I have to shave forever, 363 00:14:48,764 --> 00:14:50,899 then marry someone who's dumb and smelly? 364 00:14:50,902 --> 00:14:53,600 Not necessarily, but... 365 00:14:53,601 --> 00:14:55,254 there's a good chance. 366 00:14:55,255 --> 00:14:56,677 That's depressing. 367 00:14:56,681 --> 00:14:58,782 That's where the drinking comes in. 368 00:15:02,100 --> 00:15:03,350 Where you going? 369 00:15:03,352 --> 00:15:05,101 To get our son. 370 00:15:05,105 --> 00:15:07,410 Mary, leave him alone. He's fine. 371 00:15:07,413 --> 00:15:09,313 We have no idea who he's with, 372 00:15:09,317 --> 00:15:10,839 and you don't even care. 373 00:15:10,841 --> 00:15:14,365 You're right. Do whatever you want. 374 00:15:14,369 --> 00:15:16,020 What is your problem? 375 00:15:16,024 --> 00:15:17,460 Doesn't matter. 376 00:15:18,592 --> 00:15:20,114 Hey. 377 00:15:21,554 --> 00:15:26,344 If something is going on, tell me. 378 00:15:29,586 --> 00:15:31,325 They're coming after me at work. 379 00:15:31,327 --> 00:15:33,110 Who? 380 00:15:33,114 --> 00:15:36,596 The boosters. They want a new coach. 381 00:15:39,403 --> 00:15:40,793 Are you getting fired? 382 00:15:40,797 --> 00:15:44,889 I don't know. Maybe. 383 00:15:51,036 --> 00:15:52,496 Don't you have to go? 384 00:16:01,283 --> 00:16:03,062 I'm sorry. 385 00:16:16,130 --> 00:16:17,370 Thank you. 386 00:16:21,398 --> 00:16:22,634 "You open the gate of the crypt, 387 00:16:22,636 --> 00:16:25,133 and you see two identical elven princesses." 388 00:16:25,135 --> 00:16:26,615 Sheldon, what do you do? 389 00:16:26,618 --> 00:16:29,493 I-I don't feel so good. 390 00:16:29,495 --> 00:16:30,711 What's going on? 391 00:16:30,713 --> 00:16:32,456 My stomach hurts. 392 00:16:32,457 --> 00:16:33,850 How much did you eat? 393 00:16:33,852 --> 00:16:35,552 Well... 394 00:16:41,197 --> 00:16:42,306 Dude. 395 00:16:42,307 --> 00:16:44,136 I need to lie down. 396 00:16:45,441 --> 00:16:47,003 Oh, I don't want to throw up. 397 00:16:47,005 --> 00:16:48,442 We don't want you to throw up. 398 00:16:48,445 --> 00:16:50,456 - If he throws up, I throw up. - Well, what should we do? 399 00:16:50,459 --> 00:16:51,850 I don't know. Why are you asking me? 400 00:16:51,852 --> 00:16:53,376 You're the closest to a mom here. 401 00:16:53,379 --> 00:16:54,815 I don't know. Call his mom. 402 00:16:54,817 --> 00:16:56,209 Oh, no, don't call my mom. 403 00:16:56,211 --> 00:16:57,884 She'll never let me do this again. 404 00:16:57,888 --> 00:16:59,855 Get him something to throw up in. 405 00:17:00,875 --> 00:17:02,259 No, not the Skittles. 406 00:17:03,403 --> 00:17:05,362 Here, here. 407 00:17:05,364 --> 00:17:06,799 Here. 408 00:17:06,801 --> 00:17:09,589 Next door there's an emergency Alka-Seltzer tablet 409 00:17:09,592 --> 00:17:11,201 in my bathroom medicine chest. 410 00:17:11,203 --> 00:17:12,204 You have a bathroom? 411 00:17:12,207 --> 00:17:13,425 Why does he get a bathroom? 412 00:17:13,428 --> 00:17:14,836 Go throw up in your own bathroom. 413 00:17:14,839 --> 00:17:17,568 I don't know if I can make it. 414 00:17:19,528 --> 00:17:22,883 Get his door! 415 00:17:22,884 --> 00:17:24,059 It's locked. 416 00:17:24,061 --> 00:17:25,502 Key. 417 00:17:25,506 --> 00:17:27,414 - I'm not gonna make it. - Please make it. 418 00:17:27,417 --> 00:17:30,596 What is going on? Sheldon, are you okay? 419 00:17:30,598 --> 00:17:32,095 My stomach hurts. 420 00:17:32,097 --> 00:17:33,778 He's gonna throw up. 421 00:17:33,780 --> 00:17:36,080 Did you give him beer? Did they give you beer?! 422 00:17:36,084 --> 00:17:37,353 Just root beer. 423 00:17:37,355 --> 00:17:39,163 It's gonna be okay, baby. 424 00:17:39,165 --> 00:17:40,951 Oh... 425 00:17:40,953 --> 00:17:42,451 Why is it so colorful? 426 00:17:42,453 --> 00:17:45,023 Too many... Skittles. 427 00:17:46,291 --> 00:17:52,001 - Synced and corrected by VitoSilans - -- www.Addic7ed.com -- 30274

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