All language subtitles for Its Always Sunny in Philadelphia - 06x10

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Would you like to inspect the original subtitles? These are the user uploaded subtitles that are being translated: 1 00:00:01,704 --> 00:00:03,643 So like you said, when you come face-to-face with 2 00:00:03,711 --> 00:00:05,679 something like that, what are you supposed to do? 3 00:00:06,481 --> 00:00:08,648 SWEET DEE: Oof! 4 00:00:08,716 --> 00:00:10,083 Oh, hey, buddy. 5 00:00:10,151 --> 00:00:12,052 Yeah, what's going on there, pal? 6 00:00:12,120 --> 00:00:14,988 Oh, my God, I just found a rat's nest. 7 00:00:15,056 --> 00:00:17,824 Slaughtered about 200 of 'em. 8 00:00:17,892 --> 00:00:22,028 200? Couldn't be. That's... Jesus Christ... 9 00:00:22,096 --> 00:00:24,998 Oh, it's like, it's like whole generations of those 10 00:00:25,066 --> 00:00:29,436 things have died at my hands, and... 11 00:00:29,504 --> 00:00:32,339 mothers, fathers, grandfathers, little baby rats. 12 00:00:32,406 --> 00:00:33,440 Mmm, yeah. 13 00:00:33,508 --> 00:00:34,508 Wow. 14 00:00:34,575 --> 00:00:37,778 Well, you know, keep up the good work. 15 00:00:37,845 --> 00:00:39,374 Yeah. 16 00:00:40,140 --> 00:00:42,054 Sometimes I wonder though, if 17 00:00:43,442 --> 00:00:46,253 our lives are really more valuable than theirs, you know what I mean? 18 00:00:46,320 --> 00:00:47,587 - Yeah. - They are. 19 00:00:47,655 --> 00:00:48,255 Yeah. 20 00:00:48,322 --> 00:00:51,424 - Our lives are definitely... - Yeah. without a doubt. 21 00:00:51,492 --> 00:00:52,959 - Yeah. - Without a doubt. 22 00:00:54,782 --> 00:00:56,329 If that makes you feel any better. 23 00:00:56,397 --> 00:00:57,531 Mm-hmm. 24 00:00:57,598 --> 00:01:01,401 - Yeah, well, I suppose I oughta... - Get back to it? 25 00:01:01,469 --> 00:01:03,870 Yep. Jump right back in there, tiger. 26 00:01:03,938 --> 00:01:04,771 Get on the horse. 27 00:01:04,839 --> 00:01:06,173 Charlie, bash, bash 'em up. 28 00:01:06,240 --> 00:01:07,507 - Do what you do best. - Alright. Thanks, guys. 29 00:01:07,575 --> 00:01:08,975 Yep. Oh, God. 30 00:01:09,043 --> 00:01:10,944 I just gotta go to the bathroom. 31 00:01:11,012 --> 00:01:12,479 - Sure, yeah, yeah, yeah. - Alright, man. 32 00:01:12,547 --> 00:01:13,580 He touched me with it. 33 00:01:13,648 --> 00:01:15,582 Ugh! God, what a life, huh? 34 00:01:15,650 --> 00:01:17,417 - Today's his birthday. - Are you kidding me? 35 00:01:17,485 --> 00:01:19,452 Poor guy, on a day like this. 36 00:01:19,520 --> 00:01:20,987 We oughta do something nice for him. 37 00:01:21,055 --> 00:01:22,389 - Mm-hmm. Definitely. - Yeah, absolutely. 38 00:01:22,456 --> 00:01:24,558 Oh! You want to get him a new rat stick? 39 00:01:24,625 --> 00:01:25,559 That's a good idea. 40 00:01:25,626 --> 00:01:28,728 Abso... I was thinking maybe we should throw him a surprise party. 41 00:01:28,796 --> 00:01:29,629 He is really bummed. 42 00:01:29,697 --> 00:01:31,565 I guess we could do something nice for him. 43 00:01:31,632 --> 00:01:34,868 Definitely. Listen, for one day let's make the poor bastard feel special. 44 00:01:34,936 --> 00:01:38,839 For one day let's make this lowly rat killer feel like a king. 45 00:01:38,906 --> 00:01:39,706 Yes. 46 00:01:39,774 --> 00:01:43,343 In the simplest... Easiest... way. ...easiest. 47 00:01:43,411 --> 00:01:45,345 I'm tired today, you know? 48 00:01:48,449 --> 00:01:58,744 Sync by honeybunny www.addic7ed.com 49 00:02:18,639 --> 00:02:19,950 Here it is. I got it! 50 00:02:20,070 --> 00:02:23,103 I'm thinking we go with a Hawaiian 51 00:02:23,223 --> 00:02:25,732 trip-hop, underground 52 00:02:25,852 --> 00:02:27,582 - Huh? - What is that? 53 00:02:27,702 --> 00:02:29,065 - What even is that? - Well, you know... 54 00:02:29,185 --> 00:02:31,989 I'll even hang around with this guy Duncan from under the bridge.... 55 00:02:32,109 --> 00:02:34,151 And he runs with this rough crowd 56 00:02:34,271 --> 00:02:35,559 and they're all into 57 00:02:35,679 --> 00:02:38,224 Hawaiian underground shit, you know? 58 00:02:38,225 --> 00:02:41,928 And I made a little list of stuff that would really support that theme. 59 00:02:41,996 --> 00:02:43,163 "Fill bar with sand. 60 00:02:43,230 --> 00:02:45,699 Roast wild pig. 61 00:02:45,766 --> 00:02:46,966 Invite Duncan and crew." 62 00:02:47,034 --> 00:02:50,337 Ooh, this seems like a whole lot of work. 63 00:02:50,404 --> 00:02:53,306 Uh, does anybody really even like surprise parties anyway? 64 00:02:53,374 --> 00:02:54,708 You know? I don't. 65 00:02:54,775 --> 00:02:56,376 What the hell's the matter with you?! 66 00:02:56,444 --> 00:02:58,411 - How did you get so cynical? - Cynical? 67 00:02:58,479 --> 00:03:01,014 You can't even get excited to give your friend a party! 68 00:03:01,082 --> 00:03:04,918 I mean, giving somebody a birthday party, a surprise party 69 00:03:04,985 --> 00:03:07,487 is one of the greatest things you can do for him! 70 00:03:07,555 --> 00:03:09,389 Okay, Frank. Alright. 71 00:03:09,457 --> 00:03:12,625 Alright, alright, well, maybe we are being a little cynical. 72 00:03:12,693 --> 00:03:14,894 Clearly, this means a lot to you, so, fine. 73 00:03:14,962 --> 00:03:16,930 We'll jump on board with the party. What's the plan? 74 00:03:16,997 --> 00:03:18,998 Alright, the plan is you guys execute this list. 75 00:03:19,066 --> 00:03:19,699 Mm-hmm. 76 00:03:19,767 --> 00:03:23,536 I am gonna take Charlie to the spa for a day to distract him. 77 00:03:23,604 --> 00:03:24,504 Hold on a second. 78 00:03:24,572 --> 00:03:27,607 Why do you get to spend the day at a spa while we do all the legwork? 79 00:03:27,675 --> 00:03:30,043 Because I got these two coupons in the mail. 80 00:03:30,111 --> 00:03:32,445 Okay, I'm pregnant, and you haven't offered me coupons or 81 00:03:32,513 --> 00:03:35,749 spa days or roasted pigs or surprises or any-any of those 82 00:03:35,816 --> 00:03:37,117 fun things. 83 00:03:37,184 --> 00:03:40,053 Oh, oh, okay, well, in the interest of not being cynical 84 00:03:40,121 --> 00:03:42,989 and, you know, doing shit for other people, I'm gonna suggest 85 00:03:43,057 --> 00:03:44,958 that we give the two coupons to 86 00:03:45,025 --> 00:03:47,360 Dee and she does the spa thing. 87 00:03:47,428 --> 00:03:49,195 Surprise. Perfect. Thank you. 88 00:03:49,263 --> 00:03:50,330 Alright, cool. 89 00:03:50,398 --> 00:03:53,967 I will take this coupon and sneak out the back so Charlie doesn't see me. 90 00:03:54,034 --> 00:03:56,569 - Wait, wait. - What, what? What? 91 00:03:56,637 --> 00:03:58,772 No, you have to take Charlie with you to the spa. 92 00:03:58,839 --> 00:04:00,407 That's the whole thing. You have to distract him. 93 00:04:00,474 --> 00:04:01,508 Oh... Shit. 94 00:04:01,575 --> 00:04:05,211 Yeah, Frank, you might be right about us getting cynical. 95 00:04:05,279 --> 00:04:08,281 I just, I just jumped straight to default and was gonna throw 96 00:04:08,349 --> 00:04:09,749 this second coupon in the trash. 97 00:04:09,817 --> 00:04:12,552 But the Charlie thing, yep, we're doing the Charlie thing. 98 00:04:12,620 --> 00:04:14,988 Okay, I got it. I'm on it. 99 00:04:15,055 --> 00:04:17,090 Okay. 100 00:04:19,794 --> 00:04:21,327 Hey, Charlie! 101 00:04:21,395 --> 00:04:24,497 Okay, hey, listen, uh, you've been really stressed, so I 102 00:04:24,565 --> 00:04:27,200 thought I would take you for a spa day, just you and me. 103 00:04:27,268 --> 00:04:28,768 A what day? 104 00:04:28,836 --> 00:04:30,069 A spa day. 105 00:04:30,137 --> 00:04:31,037 What is this word "spa"? 106 00:04:31,105 --> 00:04:33,706 I feel like you're starting to say a word, and you're not finishing it. 107 00:04:33,774 --> 00:04:35,141 Are you trying to say "spaghetti"? 108 00:04:35,209 --> 00:04:36,976 Are you taking me for a spaghetti day? 109 00:04:37,044 --> 00:04:40,513 No, Charlie, I wasn't trying to take you for a spaghetti day. 110 00:04:40,581 --> 00:04:41,581 Oh, God, you know what? 111 00:04:41,649 --> 00:04:43,116 It doesn't matter. It's okay. That's alright. 112 00:04:43,184 --> 00:04:44,751 I'm doing something nice here. I tell you what. 113 00:04:44,819 --> 00:04:46,920 Let's go to a movie. Want to go to a movie? 114 00:04:46,987 --> 00:04:49,567 Dee, I go to movie or a spaghetti place with you 115 00:04:49,687 --> 00:04:51,135 you know and ***? 116 00:04:51,255 --> 00:04:52,843 What if I guarantee you 117 00:04:52,963 --> 00:04:53,922 that nobody out there will put you 118 00:04:53,961 --> 00:04:56,129 into a bag and bash you against a telephone pole? 119 00:04:56,197 --> 00:04:57,363 Would that comfort you at all? 120 00:04:57,431 --> 00:04:59,571 Nope. That's a guarantee you can't make, Dee, alright? 121 00:04:59,633 --> 00:05:02,268 Alright, I tell you what... That's why I'm building this little puppy. 122 00:05:02,336 --> 00:05:03,970 Yeah. Don't do... And no one's getting bashed. 123 00:05:04,038 --> 00:05:05,472 Okay, I tell you what, Charlie. 124 00:05:05,539 --> 00:05:07,774 If you don't come with me to the movie, I'm gonna take this 125 00:05:07,842 --> 00:05:10,210 raccoon of yours and I'm gonna bash it into a telephone pole. 126 00:05:10,277 --> 00:05:12,245 No! I can't take any more bashing today, alright? 127 00:05:12,313 --> 00:05:13,413 Okay, let's go, let's go. 128 00:05:13,481 --> 00:05:15,070 This will be fun! Alright, let's go. 129 00:05:18,752 --> 00:05:20,253 - Dennis. - Yeah? 130 00:05:20,321 --> 00:05:22,589 Why don't you check that box of tiki torches, start setting those up? 131 00:05:22,709 --> 00:05:25,191 What this? Yeah, that box there. 132 00:05:25,259 --> 00:05:26,359 What is this? 133 00:05:26,427 --> 00:05:27,827 We didn't put this in here. 134 00:05:27,895 --> 00:05:28,862 Surprise! 135 00:05:28,929 --> 00:05:30,196 What is that? What'd you do? 136 00:05:30,264 --> 00:05:31,464 I got you a present, bro! 137 00:05:31,532 --> 00:05:33,800 I'm trying to be less cynical, and Frank is totally right. 138 00:05:33,868 --> 00:05:35,668 The surprise is the way to go! 139 00:05:35,736 --> 00:05:36,736 So you got me a gift? 140 00:05:36,804 --> 00:05:38,838 Yes! Yeah, while we were picking out the decorations, I 141 00:05:38,906 --> 00:05:41,941 slipped out and I got you something I think you're gonna gonna like. 142 00:05:42,009 --> 00:05:43,910 Okay, alright. Ooh! Ooh! Okay. Uh! 143 00:05:43,978 --> 00:05:46,212 Ah! 144 00:05:46,280 --> 00:05:48,615 Oh! Oh, a shirt! 145 00:05:48,682 --> 00:05:49,816 I love this shirt! 146 00:05:49,884 --> 00:05:50,917 Oh, that's great, man! 147 00:05:50,985 --> 00:05:51,951 Thank you. 148 00:05:52,019 --> 00:05:54,254 Hey. No, this isn't the shirt that I picked out. 149 00:05:54,321 --> 00:05:56,222 Yeah. No. Well, no. What is this? 150 00:05:56,290 --> 00:05:58,324 It's the shirt that I... that I picked out. 151 00:05:58,392 --> 00:05:59,392 But that's cool. 152 00:05:59,460 --> 00:06:00,760 Here's the thing, man. 153 00:06:00,828 --> 00:06:03,863 I-I got a little suspicious when you slipped out earlier, 154 00:06:03,931 --> 00:06:07,100 and so I followed you into the store, and I saw that you were 155 00:06:07,167 --> 00:06:09,536 about to make a really bad choice, and then you did make 156 00:06:09,603 --> 00:06:12,438 that choice and you bought that other shirt, and it was a bad shirt. 157 00:06:12,506 --> 00:06:13,907 It was an ugly shirt. Hideous really. 158 00:06:13,974 --> 00:06:16,509 So I grabbed that shirt out of the bag when you weren't 159 00:06:16,577 --> 00:06:18,678 looking and I returned it and bought myself this shirt 160 00:06:18,746 --> 00:06:19,946 which isn't hideous. 161 00:06:20,014 --> 00:06:21,247 And so, surprise. 162 00:06:21,315 --> 00:06:22,549 That was a good shirt. 163 00:06:22,616 --> 00:06:23,983 No. 164 00:06:24,051 --> 00:06:27,053 This brings me no joy at all. I feel nothing. 165 00:06:27,121 --> 00:06:29,355 I feel... I feel like you just, you stole 166 00:06:29,423 --> 00:06:31,758 money from me, and then you bought yourself a shirt. 167 00:06:31,825 --> 00:06:33,159 A shirt with your money. 168 00:06:33,227 --> 00:06:34,193 Yeah. 169 00:06:34,295 --> 00:06:35,428 No, that is what happened. 170 00:06:36,797 --> 00:06:40,199 That is a ridiculous price and you know it! 171 00:06:40,267 --> 00:06:44,003 Supposing I bought a pig unseasoned and dressed it myself? 172 00:06:44,071 --> 00:06:45,405 Then what? What then?! 173 00:06:45,472 --> 00:06:50,543 Well, that's not what Jerry Carelli said, asshole! 174 00:06:50,611 --> 00:06:53,413 Ha! Pitting two pig dealers against each other. 175 00:06:53,480 --> 00:06:54,681 Ah, sure. 176 00:06:54,748 --> 00:06:56,849 Frank, are you sure about this luau thing? 177 00:06:56,917 --> 00:06:57,850 I mean, it's a ton of work. 178 00:06:57,918 --> 00:07:00,019 Yeah. Does Charlie even know what a luau is? 179 00:07:00,087 --> 00:07:02,522 I doubt Charlie can even say the word "luau." 180 00:07:02,590 --> 00:07:04,808 I mean, how do you know that's what he wants? 181 00:07:04,928 --> 00:07:06,951 Because I read it in his dream book. 182 00:07:07,844 --> 00:07:09,216 In his what? His dream book? 183 00:07:09,336 --> 00:07:12,298 Yeah. Charlie keeps a book of dreams and aspirations. 184 00:07:12,366 --> 00:07:16,436 They're mostly in pictures and symbols, but he has been 185 00:07:16,503 --> 00:07:20,673 obsessing about this luau thing since we met Duncan under the bridge. 186 00:07:20,741 --> 00:07:22,342 Okay, now, my first instinct: 187 00:07:22,409 --> 00:07:25,044 When you say things about meeting people under bridges, 188 00:07:25,112 --> 00:07:27,380 it's to, it's to berate you for hanging out with people 189 00:07:27,448 --> 00:07:29,253 under a bridge and to say to you, "Why do you hang out with 190 00:07:29,373 --> 00:07:31,625 these... with these people? You and Charlie shouldn't be..." 191 00:07:32,101 --> 00:07:35,388 But I'm not gonna say anything because I don't want to be cynical anymore. 192 00:07:35,456 --> 00:07:36,389 I'm not going to say anything. 193 00:07:36,457 --> 00:07:38,725 I'm just... Maybe the bridge is exciting. 194 00:07:38,792 --> 00:07:40,393 No. The bridge is awesome. 195 00:07:40,461 --> 00:07:41,894 Ooh. It's probably pretty cool. 196 00:07:43,297 --> 00:07:44,397 Hold on a second. Hold. 197 00:07:44,465 --> 00:07:46,766 Hey, it's the other pig guy. 198 00:07:46,834 --> 00:07:52,939 Ah, so you come crawling back, you cheap sack of shit. 199 00:07:59,027 --> 00:08:00,561 Oh, you can't bring food into the theater. 200 00:08:01,439 --> 00:08:04,660 No, I'm not. I bought it over there with that food. 201 00:08:04,780 --> 00:08:07,439 - No, you didn't. - How do you know that? 202 00:08:07,559 --> 00:08:09,575 Because we don't serve spaghetti... 203 00:08:09,695 --> 00:08:11,528 and I just watched you walk in with it. 204 00:08:11,648 --> 00:08:14,834 You call my bluff, sir. I shall dispose of this *** 205 00:08:14,954 --> 00:08:15,887 A moment, please. 206 00:08:15,955 --> 00:08:18,623 Dee, do me a favor and pop this in your purse real quick. 207 00:08:18,691 --> 00:08:19,624 No, absolutely not. 208 00:08:19,692 --> 00:08:21,059 No. Why do you have to bring spaghetti...? 209 00:08:21,127 --> 00:08:22,427 You caught me hankering for spaghetti and I want it. 210 00:08:22,495 --> 00:08:23,795 Just eat it, then. Eat it fast and we'll go. 211 00:08:23,863 --> 00:08:25,163 No, I want to enjoy it and watch the movie. 212 00:08:25,231 --> 00:08:26,631 It's going to make a mess in my purse. 213 00:08:26,699 --> 00:08:28,767 I'm leaving because the spaghetti is the whole deal for me. 214 00:08:28,835 --> 00:08:30,836 Goddamn it. Just... Goddamn it. Just put it in. Be careful. 215 00:08:30,903 --> 00:08:32,370 You are... this is so stupid. 216 00:08:32,438 --> 00:08:33,605 And there we go! 217 00:08:33,673 --> 00:08:35,507 - Got rid of it. - Great. Thank you. 218 00:08:35,575 --> 00:08:36,908 Okay. Look at this place, Dee. 219 00:08:36,976 --> 00:08:38,727 Look at the size of the place. 220 00:08:40,546 --> 00:08:41,913 What does 3-D even stand for? 221 00:08:41,981 --> 00:08:43,415 Third dimension. 222 00:08:43,483 --> 00:08:44,649 Just... please stop talking. 223 00:08:44,717 --> 00:08:47,352 Third dimen... What dimension are we in? 224 00:08:47,420 --> 00:08:48,520 Shh! Charlie, I don't know. 225 00:08:48,588 --> 00:08:49,521 Shh! 226 00:08:49,589 --> 00:08:51,790 Isn't stuff, like, supposed to pop out at us? 227 00:08:51,858 --> 00:08:52,791 I don't know. I'm not sure. 228 00:08:52,859 --> 00:08:54,693 Let's watch and find out, okay? Whoa! 229 00:08:55,595 --> 00:08:56,728 Did you see that? 230 00:08:56,796 --> 00:08:58,296 Yeah. Yeah, I saw that. 231 00:08:58,364 --> 00:09:00,098 That came, like, right at you. 232 00:09:00,166 --> 00:09:00,766 Is this safe? 233 00:09:00,833 --> 00:09:01,867 Are you kidding me? 234 00:09:01,934 --> 00:09:02,868 I don't know. 235 00:09:02,935 --> 00:09:04,870 Take the glasses off if you're uncomfortable, okay? 236 00:09:04,937 --> 00:09:06,738 But then everything's, like, blurry. 237 00:09:06,806 --> 00:09:08,607 Then put the glasses on and shut the hell up. 238 00:09:08,674 --> 00:09:09,941 - Shh! - You shh! 239 00:09:10,009 --> 00:09:11,309 See, then, stuff's not safe. 240 00:09:11,377 --> 00:09:12,377 Uh-oh. 241 00:09:12,445 --> 00:09:13,578 Whoa. 242 00:09:13,646 --> 00:09:15,947 What happened to my meatball? 243 00:09:16,015 --> 00:09:16,948 Hey, would you shut up? 244 00:09:17,016 --> 00:09:18,917 Oh, no, you know what happened? When I... 245 00:09:18,985 --> 00:09:21,052 - I bet it flew off when I... - Okay, you are a sleuth. 246 00:09:21,120 --> 00:09:22,788 You've gotten to the bottom of it. 247 00:09:22,855 --> 00:09:24,122 That's very exciting. Now shut up. 248 00:09:24,190 --> 00:09:24,790 Let me just find it. 249 00:09:24,857 --> 00:09:26,858 - I'm sorry, did you see a meatball... - Charlie, sit down. 250 00:09:26,926 --> 00:09:27,526 Oh, my God, Charlie. 251 00:09:27,593 --> 00:09:29,194 I swear to God, if you don't sit down and shut up and watch the 252 00:09:29,262 --> 00:09:30,195 movie, I'm going to attack you. 253 00:09:30,263 --> 00:09:32,197 I don't care how pregnant I am, I am going to get out of this 254 00:09:32,265 --> 00:09:33,198 seat, I'm going to attack you. 255 00:09:33,266 --> 00:09:35,200 - I got it, got it, got it... - Oh, you got it? Okay, good. 256 00:09:35,268 --> 00:09:36,201 Sit down. 257 00:09:36,269 --> 00:09:37,869 - Got the meatball. - Sit down! 258 00:09:37,937 --> 00:09:39,871 - Quiet down! - The movie's boring. 259 00:09:39,939 --> 00:09:40,539 You... You...! 260 00:09:40,606 --> 00:09:43,508 How could you... You're not watching the movie. 261 00:09:45,711 --> 00:09:47,846 Ugh. Uh-uh. 262 00:09:47,914 --> 00:09:49,681 Aah, you're not gonna like this. 263 00:09:49,749 --> 00:09:50,682 What happened? 264 00:09:50,750 --> 00:09:51,850 Ah, nuts. 265 00:09:51,918 --> 00:09:54,686 Some-some spaghetti kind of like spilled in your purse a little bit. 266 00:09:54,754 --> 00:09:56,054 Oh, shit. Want your spaghetti, Charlie? 267 00:09:56,122 --> 00:09:57,389 Want your spaghetti? Here's your spaghetti. 268 00:09:57,456 --> 00:09:59,424 Oh, don't dump it on the ground like that. 269 00:09:59,492 --> 00:10:00,826 Shut up and watch the movie. 270 00:10:00,893 --> 00:10:02,627 I don't want to shut up and watch the movie. 271 00:10:02,695 --> 00:10:04,462 Can't eat spaghetti, can't follow the movie. 272 00:10:04,530 --> 00:10:05,897 Doesn't make sense. I'm going back to the bar. 273 00:10:05,965 --> 00:10:06,598 Good. Good. Go to the bar. 274 00:10:06,666 --> 00:10:08,033 - I'm taking the spaghetti with me. - Excuse me. 275 00:10:08,100 --> 00:10:09,034 Are you kidding me? 276 00:10:09,101 --> 00:10:11,369 Are you kidding me? 277 00:10:14,440 --> 00:10:16,007 Dude, I just saw another rat. 278 00:10:16,075 --> 00:10:16,741 Yeah, I know. 279 00:10:16,809 --> 00:10:18,276 There's definitely a ton of rats in here, that's for sure. 280 00:10:18,344 --> 00:10:20,212 I see him! I see him! Oh, shit. 281 00:10:20,279 --> 00:10:21,546 - We gotta distract him. - Yeah. 282 00:10:21,614 --> 00:10:22,981 I'll tell him the keg exploded. 283 00:10:23,049 --> 00:10:24,649 No, that's a stupid idea. That's a stupid idea. 284 00:10:24,717 --> 00:10:25,650 We're going with the burst pipe. 285 00:10:25,718 --> 00:10:27,097 Uh, I like the keg idea. 286 00:10:27,217 --> 00:10:28,321 Your idea is so stupid... 287 00:10:28,441 --> 00:10:30,051 Let's go with the burst pipe... 288 00:10:30,171 --> 00:10:31,382 ♪♪♪ 289 00:10:31,502 --> 00:10:32,891 Hey, Charlie, Charlie! 290 00:10:32,959 --> 00:10:33,892 Charlie boy! 291 00:10:33,960 --> 00:10:35,961 Hey, where'd you get those glasses, bud? 292 00:10:36,028 --> 00:10:36,928 Oh, these? 293 00:10:36,996 --> 00:10:38,930 They're just, like, third dimension glasses, you know? 294 00:10:38,998 --> 00:10:41,633 Don't really work, though, 'cause I feel like I'm still 295 00:10:41,701 --> 00:10:43,768 seeing stuff in whatever dimension we live in. 296 00:10:43,836 --> 00:10:47,505 Right. Well, listen, um, you can't really go in the bar right now, bro. 297 00:10:47,573 --> 00:10:48,273 Why not? 298 00:10:48,341 --> 00:10:49,941 Well, because a keg exploded. 299 00:10:50,009 --> 00:10:50,942 Holy shit. Can that happen? 300 00:10:51,010 --> 00:10:54,312 A piece of metal flew off the keg and hit Dennis right in the dick. 301 00:10:54,380 --> 00:10:55,680 Holy shit. Are you okay? 302 00:10:55,748 --> 00:10:57,716 Yeah... No, I-I'm fine. 303 00:10:57,783 --> 00:10:58,884 I'm fine. I got lucky. 304 00:10:58,951 --> 00:11:00,418 It mashed right into it. 305 00:11:00,486 --> 00:11:02,254 We all thought he was gonna lose it. 306 00:11:02,321 --> 00:11:04,256 Charlie, it lumped it up and mangled it like a chicken 307 00:11:04,323 --> 00:11:04,923 potpie down there. 308 00:11:04,991 --> 00:11:06,558 Dickless Dennis. 309 00:11:06,626 --> 00:11:07,993 That's what we should call him now... Dickless Dennis. 310 00:11:08,060 --> 00:11:09,561 No, no, no. It's totally fine. 311 00:11:10,630 --> 00:11:12,764 Oh, Dickless Dennis. 312 00:11:12,832 --> 00:11:16,468 Oh, Dick... But it doesn't apply because my totally went back to 313 00:11:16,535 --> 00:11:17,636 normal, and it's fine now. 314 00:11:17,703 --> 00:11:19,471 I'll show it to you. I don't want to see it. 315 00:11:19,538 --> 00:11:21,072 Anyway, moving on, how was the spa? 316 00:11:21,140 --> 00:11:22,107 Spa? 317 00:11:22,174 --> 00:11:24,175 Oh, spaghetti? 318 00:11:24,243 --> 00:11:25,210 How's my spaghetti? 319 00:11:25,278 --> 00:11:26,159 Dee threw it on the floor. 320 00:11:26,279 --> 00:11:27,212 No, no, the spa. 321 00:11:27,280 --> 00:11:28,280 The spa that Dee took you to. 322 00:11:28,347 --> 00:11:30,015 Oh, no, she took me to a movie. 323 00:11:30,082 --> 00:11:31,016 Yeah, it was lame. 324 00:11:31,083 --> 00:11:31,783 I couldn't understand it. 325 00:11:31,851 --> 00:11:32,884 Made no sense. 326 00:11:33,856 --> 00:11:35,726 That cynical bitch. 327 00:11:37,924 --> 00:11:40,692 Hello. I would like to redeem this coupon and go ahead 328 00:11:40,760 --> 00:11:42,060 and toss this one in the trash for me. 329 00:11:42,128 --> 00:11:43,395 Busted! Ah, see! 330 00:11:43,462 --> 00:11:44,796 Oh, busted, Dee. You're so busted. 331 00:11:44,864 --> 00:11:46,865 What? What are you guys doing here? 332 00:11:46,933 --> 00:11:49,901 I'm taking Charlie to the spa because he's stressed. 333 00:11:49,969 --> 00:11:51,903 A keg exploded in the bar, blew Dennis's dick off. 334 00:11:51,971 --> 00:11:53,905 No, no... Oh, it's a mess down there. 335 00:11:53,973 --> 00:11:55,707 No, my... My dick is fine, Dee. 336 00:11:55,775 --> 00:11:56,708 Let me have those coupons. 337 00:11:56,776 --> 00:11:57,709 No, you said I can have them. 338 00:11:57,777 --> 00:11:59,878 Dee, you were supposed to take Charlie. 339 00:11:59,946 --> 00:12:01,646 Yeah, I tried to take Charlie, but he refused to go. 340 00:12:01,714 --> 00:12:04,082 What is your spaghetti policy here? 341 00:12:04,150 --> 00:12:05,317 Are you hearing this? 342 00:12:05,384 --> 00:12:06,284 Are you hearing this? 343 00:12:06,352 --> 00:12:08,253 He doesn't belong in a place like this, you guys. 344 00:12:08,321 --> 00:12:09,921 Alright, come on, we're wasting time. 345 00:12:09,989 --> 00:12:12,257 Go get Duncan and the bridge crew and bring them to the bar. 346 00:12:12,325 --> 00:12:14,292 I'll occupy Charlie. No. 347 00:12:14,360 --> 00:12:16,962 Where's the robes? 348 00:12:20,800 --> 00:12:23,735 I think this is it, right here. 349 00:12:23,803 --> 00:12:25,337 This is sketchy as hell. 350 00:12:26,572 --> 00:12:27,372 Yeah. 351 00:12:32,845 --> 00:12:35,780 Hey, um, yeah, we're looking for Duncan. 352 00:12:37,917 --> 00:12:39,217 Oh, let's go. 353 00:12:39,285 --> 00:12:41,486 Oh, yeah, we should take that as a sign, right? 354 00:12:43,489 --> 00:12:44,708 Yeah. Oh. 355 00:12:45,954 --> 00:12:47,649 Come on. 356 00:12:47,769 --> 00:12:49,609 Yeah? 357 00:12:49,729 --> 00:12:51,696 Hey. 358 00:12:51,764 --> 00:12:55,200 Hey. Hey. 359 00:12:55,267 --> 00:12:57,202 You pregnant. 360 00:13:02,074 --> 00:13:04,009 One more time. 361 00:13:04,076 --> 00:13:06,011 What is happening in here? 362 00:13:06,078 --> 00:13:07,245 I don't know. 363 00:13:07,313 --> 00:13:09,614 Come on, no Alright, uh, Mr. Duncan, 364 00:13:09,682 --> 00:13:11,783 we were wondering if we could talk to you about... 365 00:13:11,851 --> 00:13:12,650 I ain't no Duncan. 366 00:13:12,718 --> 00:13:15,253 It's this nigga right here about to go level three and shit. 367 00:13:15,321 --> 00:13:16,254 That's Duncan. 368 00:13:16,322 --> 00:13:17,188 Oh... you're Duncan. 369 00:13:17,256 --> 00:13:20,191 Uh, Mr. Duncan, we were wondering if you could come to a surprise party for Charlie. 370 00:13:20,259 --> 00:13:21,960 Who? Charlie. 371 00:13:22,028 --> 00:13:23,094 He's Frank's friend. 372 00:13:23,162 --> 00:13:25,830 It's my understanding you guys have all been hanging out under a bridge. 373 00:13:25,898 --> 00:13:26,598 Oh, yeah, Frank. 374 00:13:26,665 --> 00:13:27,799 I know that bitch. 375 00:13:27,867 --> 00:13:30,335 Okay, hey, listen, Frank mentioned that you might be 376 00:13:30,403 --> 00:13:31,803 willing to... Oh, shit! 377 00:13:31,871 --> 00:13:34,339 Level three, son! Yeah, level three! 378 00:13:34,407 --> 00:13:37,709 This is bizarre, okay? 379 00:13:37,777 --> 00:13:40,045 Charlie should not have anything to do with these people. 380 00:13:40,079 --> 00:13:41,679 No. They are deranged. 381 00:13:41,747 --> 00:13:43,681 You know what? Frank has too much influence over this whole 382 00:13:43,749 --> 00:13:44,682 thing, alright? 383 00:13:44,750 --> 00:13:46,618 I think we gotta stop and think about what Charlie wants. 384 00:13:46,685 --> 00:13:48,620 Yeah, I think we need to get our hands on Charlie's dream 385 00:13:48,687 --> 00:13:50,789 book and we need to figure out what that kid wants ourselves. 386 00:13:51,924 --> 00:13:52,524 Mother pus bucket. 387 00:13:52,591 --> 00:13:55,827 You piece of shit, you broke my wall! 388 00:13:55,895 --> 00:13:57,662 We have company here. 389 00:13:59,065 --> 00:13:59,931 Should we call the police? 390 00:13:59,999 --> 00:14:01,433 Oh, you know what, let's just go, let's just go. 391 00:14:01,500 --> 00:14:02,901 No, no, no, no, no. Let's get the hell out of here. 392 00:14:02,968 --> 00:14:05,570 Alright. 393 00:14:07,907 --> 00:14:09,707 Charlie, let's go. 394 00:14:09,775 --> 00:14:10,608 Get in here. 395 00:14:10,676 --> 00:14:12,177 Oh, oh, oh. 396 00:14:12,244 --> 00:14:15,580 Hey, guys, the management needs everybody to get out, because 397 00:14:15,648 --> 00:14:18,049 they caught a guy jerking off in here and they're going to send 398 00:14:18,117 --> 00:14:20,251 in a crew to wipe down the loads. 399 00:14:20,319 --> 00:14:21,886 Go ahead, go on, let's go. 400 00:14:21,954 --> 00:14:23,288 God, it's terrible. 401 00:14:23,355 --> 00:14:25,290 It's really disgusting. 402 00:14:27,393 --> 00:14:29,661 Get rid of all the strange dongs. 403 00:14:29,728 --> 00:14:31,162 Ah. 404 00:14:31,230 --> 00:14:33,131 Yeah, a little bit. 405 00:14:33,199 --> 00:14:34,099 I don't get it, man. 406 00:14:34,166 --> 00:14:36,701 What's so relaxing about sitting around in a hot, wet room? 407 00:14:36,769 --> 00:14:38,403 It's all about opening up your pores, Charlie. 408 00:14:38,471 --> 00:14:39,170 Yeah. 409 00:14:39,238 --> 00:14:41,172 Yeah, take your robe off. 410 00:14:41,240 --> 00:14:42,841 Yeah, that's it. 411 00:14:42,908 --> 00:14:45,237 You got your clothes on. 412 00:14:45,357 --> 00:14:46,805 - Get your clothes off. - What? No. 413 00:14:46,925 --> 00:14:48,990 I can't get naked in public. 414 00:14:49,110 --> 00:14:51,549 Suit yourself, alright? 415 00:14:52,212 --> 00:14:54,285 I am gonna roast like a pig. 416 00:14:54,405 --> 00:14:55,873 OK, I'm gonna eat the spaghetti. 417 00:15:00,809 --> 00:15:02,165 Oh, guys, guys, guys. 418 00:15:02,285 --> 00:15:03,342 Hey, this is it. 419 00:15:03,462 --> 00:15:05,945 Dram... Dram bak... *** 420 00:15:06,065 --> 00:15:08,233 Yeah, look at this... Pictures and symbols. 421 00:15:08,300 --> 00:15:10,502 I don't see anything about our stupid luau, but, uh... 422 00:15:10,569 --> 00:15:12,036 This looks weird. 423 00:15:12,104 --> 00:15:13,671 What is that? What do you make of it, guys? 424 00:15:13,739 --> 00:15:19,277 Looks like a drawing of a pair of jeans, a plus sign and a chicken. 425 00:15:19,345 --> 00:15:21,379 Denim... chicken. 426 00:15:21,447 --> 00:15:23,047 Denim chicken. 427 00:15:23,115 --> 00:15:26,584 Okay, guys, my gut is telling me to throw this book in the trash. 428 00:15:26,652 --> 00:15:27,952 Well, yeah. It's absolute nonsense. 429 00:15:28,020 --> 00:15:28,620 Uh-huh. 430 00:15:28,687 --> 00:15:30,622 I think we're all feeling the same thing, but I think we need 431 00:15:30,689 --> 00:15:31,656 to fight that instinct. 432 00:15:31,724 --> 00:15:33,925 We have to throw a party for Charlie. It's so simple. 433 00:15:33,993 --> 00:15:35,593 If we can't do that, what does that say about us? 434 00:15:35,661 --> 00:15:37,128 You're right, you're right. This isn't about us. 435 00:15:37,196 --> 00:15:38,530 Let's not be cynical. Let's do what the kid wants. 436 00:15:38,597 --> 00:15:41,966 Yeah. If he wants a worm... hat... Worm hat. 437 00:15:42,034 --> 00:15:42,634 Worm hat. 438 00:15:42,701 --> 00:15:45,303 Okay, how do we get him a worm hat, 'cause I don't know what that is. 439 00:15:45,371 --> 00:15:47,071 Maybe there's a drawing, or... What is that? 440 00:15:47,139 --> 00:15:48,740 - That's a bird with teeth. - It sure is. 441 00:15:48,807 --> 00:15:50,775 Okay, look, we don't have a lot of time, so let's just 442 00:15:50,843 --> 00:15:51,743 figure out the best we can do. 443 00:15:51,810 --> 00:15:52,810 We can do it, we can do it. 444 00:15:52,878 --> 00:15:54,279 Alright, we'll do these things. 445 00:15:54,346 --> 00:15:56,314 We'll do these things, okay. 446 00:16:01,745 --> 00:16:04,227 Dude, how much longer do we have to stay in here? 447 00:16:04,347 --> 00:16:05,481 Come on, just relax. 448 00:16:05,548 --> 00:16:06,882 Take your clothes off. 449 00:16:06,950 --> 00:16:08,484 I feel trapped in here, Frank. 450 00:16:08,551 --> 00:16:09,385 Huh? 451 00:16:09,452 --> 00:16:11,720 I'm trapped like a rat. 452 00:16:11,788 --> 00:16:14,490 Holy shit, I'm trapped like a rat, aren't I? 453 00:16:14,557 --> 00:16:16,392 - No, you're not, Charlie. - I'm a rat in here. 454 00:16:16,459 --> 00:16:17,393 I'm a rat! 455 00:16:17,460 --> 00:16:20,095 I'm trapped like a... 456 00:16:20,163 --> 00:16:21,030 I got to get out of here. 457 00:16:21,097 --> 00:16:21,830 Calm down, Charlie. 458 00:16:21,898 --> 00:16:24,433 I'm tired of being in weird places, Frank, 'cause I'm trapped like a rat. 459 00:16:24,501 --> 00:16:25,934 Calm down, Charlie, calm down. 460 00:16:26,002 --> 00:16:27,269 - Relax. - Okay, alright, alright. 461 00:16:27,337 --> 00:16:28,604 I got to get out of here! Now calm down. 462 00:16:28,672 --> 00:16:29,338 How do I get this off? 463 00:16:31,608 --> 00:16:33,008 Charlie, no, no. 464 00:16:33,076 --> 00:16:34,309 Take it easy, Charlie. 465 00:16:34,377 --> 00:16:35,244 Just bash me, Frank. 466 00:16:35,311 --> 00:16:36,912 No, I'm not going to bash you, Charlie. 467 00:16:36,980 --> 00:16:37,880 Just bash me like a rat. 468 00:16:37,947 --> 00:16:40,464 Bash me like a rat and get it over with. 469 00:16:40,584 --> 00:16:42,496 Oh, sorry guys. 470 00:16:42,930 --> 00:16:44,442 Just let me know when you're done. 471 00:16:44,954 --> 00:16:46,609 I'm the guy who wipes down the loads. 472 00:16:54,130 --> 00:16:57,032 I'm not wearing the stupid thing, and that's it. 473 00:16:57,100 --> 00:16:57,933 It's a lei. 474 00:16:58,001 --> 00:16:59,835 Surprise! 475 00:16:59,903 --> 00:17:01,437 What the shit is this? 476 00:17:01,504 --> 00:17:02,471 Where's my luau? 477 00:17:02,539 --> 00:17:04,473 Well, we went around you, Frank. Yeah. 478 00:17:04,541 --> 00:17:05,974 - Happy birthday, Charlie. - Happy birthday. 479 00:17:06,042 --> 00:17:07,309 Happy birthday? 480 00:17:07,377 --> 00:17:11,346 Oh, is that why you guys were doing all that weird shit with me today? 481 00:17:11,414 --> 00:17:13,682 Yeah. We were trying to distract you so we could plan your party. 482 00:17:13,750 --> 00:17:15,250 Thanks, guys. Yeah. 483 00:17:15,318 --> 00:17:16,351 It's not my birthday, though. 484 00:17:16,419 --> 00:17:17,886 Huh? It's not your birthday? 485 00:17:17,954 --> 00:17:20,756 Nope. No, dicks, it's my birthday. 486 00:17:20,824 --> 00:17:22,925 What? Are you kidding me? 487 00:17:22,992 --> 00:17:23,892 No, I'm not kidding you. 488 00:17:23,960 --> 00:17:24,960 Wait, wait a second. 489 00:17:25,028 --> 00:17:28,063 Were you trying to get us to plan your surprise party? 490 00:17:28,131 --> 00:17:30,265 Why wouldn't you just plan it yourself? 491 00:17:30,333 --> 00:17:31,300 Well, that's lame. 492 00:17:31,367 --> 00:17:35,370 I mean, this way I get my surprise party and I give you 493 00:17:35,438 --> 00:17:38,240 the satisfaction of doing something nice for somebody. 494 00:17:38,308 --> 00:17:40,542 Oh, my God. That is not doing something nice. 495 00:17:40,610 --> 00:17:42,177 That is tricking us. Son of a bitch. 496 00:17:42,245 --> 00:17:43,579 Where's Duncan? Where's Dunc...? 497 00:17:43,646 --> 00:17:45,114 You should not be hanging out with Duncan. 498 00:17:45,181 --> 00:17:46,682 You should not be associating people like that. 499 00:17:46,750 --> 00:17:47,783 I'm saying, I don't care. 500 00:17:47,851 --> 00:17:48,817 It's coming out of my mouth. 501 00:17:48,885 --> 00:17:50,786 Those weird bridge people that are like...? 502 00:17:50,854 --> 00:17:53,455 Yeah. All that, like, Hawwoowin lauow? 503 00:17:53,523 --> 00:17:55,124 I knew it, I knew he couldn't say it. 504 00:17:55,191 --> 00:17:56,458 Luau, luau. Luau. 505 00:17:56,526 --> 00:17:57,226 What is it, you know? 506 00:17:57,293 --> 00:17:58,861 I mean, it's the weird... Hello? 507 00:17:58,928 --> 00:18:00,462 Hang on. Oh, yeah. 508 00:18:00,530 --> 00:18:02,197 What do we got going on over here, guys? 509 00:18:02,265 --> 00:18:04,900 Okay, well, Charlie, when we thought it was your birthday, we 510 00:18:04,968 --> 00:18:06,802 went through your dream book and we tried to recreate some of the 511 00:18:06,870 --> 00:18:07,703 stuff we found in there. 512 00:18:07,771 --> 00:18:09,972 Yes, that's... okay. 513 00:18:10,039 --> 00:18:12,307 Um... denim chicken? 514 00:18:12,375 --> 00:18:13,242 Yes! 515 00:18:13,309 --> 00:18:14,443 Denim chicken. 516 00:18:14,511 --> 00:18:16,545 Now I got to reroute the pig delivery. 517 00:18:16,613 --> 00:18:17,379 Nobody gives a shit. 518 00:18:17,520 --> 00:18:18,587 Okay. 519 00:18:18,654 --> 00:18:21,389 And I'm assuming the teeth are fake, yes? 520 00:18:21,457 --> 00:18:24,359 Yes, well, they're not real human teeth if that's what 521 00:18:24,427 --> 00:18:25,160 you're asking. 522 00:18:25,228 --> 00:18:28,764 No, I mean, did you discover a bird with teeth in this fashion? 523 00:18:28,831 --> 00:18:31,233 That does not exist in nature. Okay. 524 00:18:31,300 --> 00:18:32,501 I'm not sure about that. 525 00:18:32,568 --> 00:18:34,069 But either way, good glue work. 526 00:18:34,137 --> 00:18:36,938 Do any of you assholes want to know how old I am? 527 00:18:37,006 --> 00:18:37,839 Whatever, Frank. 528 00:18:37,907 --> 00:18:40,601 Nobody... Alright so... So, Charlie, this is my favorite part. 529 00:18:40,721 --> 00:18:43,578 We weren't quite sure what a worm hat was, right? 530 00:18:43,646 --> 00:18:44,780 So we made a few of them. 531 00:18:44,847 --> 00:18:45,947 This is the first one. 532 00:18:46,015 --> 00:18:47,476 It's a hat made of worms, okay? 533 00:18:47,596 --> 00:18:50,584 And then option number two is a hat that you put on 534 00:18:50,836 --> 00:18:53,133 and if you do that you look like maybe you're a worm. 535 00:18:53,253 --> 00:18:56,647 Right...And then the third one... and this is the best one, Charlie... 536 00:18:56,767 --> 00:18:58,994 is a hat for your worm. 537 00:18:59,061 --> 00:19:02,230 Oh, your teeny tiny little worm gets a teeny tiny little hat. If you want him to be fancy. 538 00:19:02,298 --> 00:19:05,382 So which was is it? Which one were you talking about? Yeah, who's right? 539 00:19:05,502 --> 00:19:07,258 Well, I don't recall every writing worm hat. 540 00:19:07,378 --> 00:19:09,177 Yeah, yeah, yeah, it was in your dream book. Your... 541 00:19:09,297 --> 00:19:11,387 Oh... "Wormhat." 542 00:19:11,507 --> 00:19:13,068 Yeah, that's a German guy. 543 00:19:13,188 --> 00:19:15,000 His name is Hans Wormhat. 544 00:19:15,120 --> 00:19:16,121 He appears in my dreams. 545 00:19:16,238 --> 00:19:18,839 He drive a biplane and he shoots it at me and I run through a field. 546 00:19:18,907 --> 00:19:20,308 You know what, you guys blow. 547 00:19:20,375 --> 00:19:22,176 I'm gonna go find Duncan. 548 00:19:22,244 --> 00:19:24,145 Go, go! Go! 549 00:19:24,213 --> 00:19:27,415 Guys, wow, the denim chicken, the bird with teeth, 550 00:19:27,482 --> 00:19:29,317 Wormhat's worm hat. 551 00:19:29,384 --> 00:19:31,285 I mean, I don't know what to say, man. 552 00:19:31,353 --> 00:19:33,254 This is just what I needed today. 553 00:19:33,322 --> 00:19:34,632 Guess what, buddy? There's one more thing. 554 00:19:37,793 --> 00:19:39,794 Is that what I think it is? 555 00:19:39,861 --> 00:19:41,762 That's a new rat stick, dude. 556 00:19:41,830 --> 00:19:44,198 And you can bash up a whole bunch of rats with one quick 557 00:19:44,266 --> 00:19:45,266 strike, so it's more humane. 558 00:19:45,334 --> 00:19:46,282 Yeah? 559 00:19:48,270 --> 00:19:50,037 Oh, man. 560 00:19:50,105 --> 00:19:51,372 Well, what do you...? Oh, you like it? 561 00:19:51,440 --> 00:19:53,641 What do you think? I love it. 562 00:19:53,709 --> 00:19:54,976 I mean... Ah. 563 00:19:55,043 --> 00:19:58,579 I don't know what to say, 'cause no one's ever really, um... 564 00:19:58,647 --> 00:20:00,181 I don't know what to say, guys. 565 00:20:00,249 --> 00:20:01,782 You don't have to say anything, man. 566 00:20:01,850 --> 00:20:04,819 Maybe I could give it a quick whirl around the basement and 567 00:20:04,886 --> 00:20:06,954 see if I can kill a couple rats. 568 00:20:07,022 --> 00:20:08,322 Yeah, absolutely. You've earned it. 569 00:20:08,390 --> 00:20:10,491 You should, you should. Go bash 'em up, buddy. 570 00:20:12,804 --> 00:20:14,095 Whoo! 571 00:20:15,297 --> 00:20:17,779 What a life. 572 00:20:18,563 --> 00:20:21,672 Sync by honeybunny www.addic7ed.com 42755

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