subtitlecat.com

All language subtitles for South.Park.Post.Covid.Covid.Returns.2021.1080p.WEBRip.x264-RARBG

Afrikaans

Akan

Albanian

Amharic

Arabic

Armenian

Azerbaijani

Basque

Belarusian

Bemba

Bengali

Bihari

Bosnian

Breton

Bulgarian

Cambodian

Catalan

Cebuano

Cherokee

Chichewa

Chinese (Simplified)

Chinese (Traditional)

Corsican

Croatian

Czech

Danish

Dutch

English Download

Esperanto

Estonian

Ewe

Faroese

Filipino

Finnish

French

Frisian

Galician

Georgian

German

Greek

Guarani

Gujarati

Haitian Creole

Hausa

Hawaiian

Hebrew

Hindi

Hmong

Hungarian

Icelandic

Igbo

Indonesian

Interlingua

Irish

Italian Download

Japanese Download

Javanese

Kannada

Kazakh

Kinyarwanda

Kirundi

Kongo

Korean

Krio (Sierra Leone)

Kurdish

Kurdish (Soranî)

Kyrgyz

Laothian

Latin

Latvian

Lingala

Lithuanian

Lozi

Luganda

Luo

Luxembourgish

Macedonian

Malagasy

Malay

Malayalam

Maltese

Maori

Marathi

Mauritian Creole

Moldavian

Mongolian

Myanmar (Burmese)

Montenegrin

Nepali

Nigerian Pidgin

Northern Sotho

Norwegian

Norwegian (Nynorsk)

Occitan

Oriya

Oromo

Pashto

Persian

Polish Download

Portuguese (Brazil)

Portuguese (Portugal)

Punjabi

Quechua

Romanian

Romansh

Runyakitara

Russian

Samoan

Scots Gaelic

Serbian

Serbo-Croatian

Sesotho

Setswana

Seychellois Creole

Shona

Sindhi

Sinhalese

Slovak

Slovenian

Somali

Spanish

Spanish (Latin American)

Sundanese

Swahili

Swedish Download

Tajik

Tamil

Tatar

Telugu

Thai

Tigrinya

Tonga

Tshiluba

Tumbuka

Turkish

Turkmen

Twi

Uighur

Ukrainian

Urdu

Uzbek

Vietnamese

Welsh

Wolof

Xhosa

Yiddish

Yoruba

Zulu

Would you like to inspect the original subtitles? These are the user uploaded subtitles that are being translated: 1 00:00:28,028 --> 00:00:30,364 You guys! You guys! 2 00:00:31,031 --> 00:00:32,866 Oh, my God, you're not gonna believe this! 3 00:00:32,966 --> 00:00:35,336 -Dude, what? -You guys... 4 00:00:36,670 --> 00:00:39,873 Heather Williams farted during P.E. class. 5 00:00:39,973 --> 00:00:42,443 -So? -So? 6 00:00:42,543 --> 00:00:44,412 Heather Williams farted during P.E. class! 7 00:00:44,512 --> 00:00:46,647 That means we are gonna sit courtside 8 00:00:46,747 --> 00:00:48,382 at the Denver Nuggets game next Saturday! 9 00:00:49,783 --> 00:00:50,618 What? 10 00:00:50,718 --> 00:00:52,420 Ugh! Heather Williams' mom 11 00:00:52,520 --> 00:00:53,621 works for Coors in Golden! 12 00:00:53,721 --> 00:00:55,389 Coors is the second biggest sponsor 13 00:00:55,489 --> 00:00:57,091 of the Pepsi Center where the Nuggets play! 14 00:00:57,191 --> 00:00:58,826 We tell Heather that if she doesn't get us courtside seats, 15 00:00:58,926 --> 00:01:00,694 then everyone's gonna know she farted in P.E. class! 16 00:01:00,794 --> 00:01:03,897 Whoa. I've never seen a Nuggets game in person. 17 00:01:03,997 --> 00:01:05,999 Well, we're about to! All we have to do is show Heather 18 00:01:06,100 --> 00:01:07,701 we have proof and she'll do whatever we want! 19 00:01:07,801 --> 00:01:09,103 What proof do you have? 20 00:01:09,203 --> 00:01:10,538 Kenny had his phone out! 21 00:01:10,638 --> 00:01:11,839 He got a photo of Heather right when she farted. 22 00:01:11,939 --> 00:01:14,708 Look! Isn't this awesome, you guys?! 23 00:01:14,808 --> 00:01:17,111 -Let's go, Nuggets! 24 00:01:17,211 --> 00:01:19,380 ALL: Let's go, Nuggets! 25 00:01:19,480 --> 00:01:22,082 Let's go, Nuggets! 26 00:01:25,653 --> 00:01:28,522 Kids! Kids, can I have your attention, please. 27 00:01:28,622 --> 00:01:32,092 Kids, listen up. This is an emergency. 28 00:01:32,193 --> 00:01:36,864 Everything is fine but... we are sending you all home. 29 00:01:38,466 --> 00:01:40,768 Some of you may have heard but there's a little virus 30 00:01:40,868 --> 00:01:43,604 going around and the school district wants to make sure 31 00:01:43,704 --> 00:01:46,140 we're all safe, so we're shutting down 32 00:01:46,240 --> 00:01:48,342 the school for about two weeks. 33 00:01:48,442 --> 00:01:50,511 Two weeks?! Yippie! 34 00:01:52,413 --> 00:01:53,714 Oh, not now. 35 00:01:53,814 --> 00:01:55,983 Your parents are here to pick you up. So let's go. 36 00:01:56,083 --> 00:01:58,886 I'm sure it's nothing; we'll see you in a couple of weeks. 37 00:01:58,986 --> 00:02:01,054 You guys-- you guys, Heather Thompson 38 00:02:01,155 --> 00:02:03,524 farted in P.E. class! Guys? 39 00:02:07,094 --> 00:02:09,697 Every night I have the same dream, 40 00:02:09,797 --> 00:02:12,032 and relive the whole thing again... 41 00:02:12,900 --> 00:02:14,602 ANDREW CUOMO: It's called social distancing. 42 00:02:14,702 --> 00:02:16,637 If we stay six feet apart from each other 43 00:02:16,737 --> 00:02:18,239 and wear a mask... 44 00:02:18,339 --> 00:02:21,108 And also I'm shutting down the city and I'm a pervert. 45 00:02:21,209 --> 00:02:23,211 And we've got to get control of this thing! 46 00:02:23,311 --> 00:02:25,613 RANDY: I'm just getting sick of being here every day with you, 47 00:02:25,713 --> 00:02:26,947 -that's all. -You think 48 00:02:27,047 --> 00:02:29,082 I like being here every day with you?! 49 00:02:29,183 --> 00:02:30,818 I am much easier to get along with 50 00:02:30,918 --> 00:02:32,686 during a stay-at-home order! 51 00:02:48,802 --> 00:02:51,939 Come on, Stan, we're gonna visit Grandpa! 52 00:02:52,039 --> 00:02:54,242 Hi, Grandpa! 53 00:02:54,342 --> 00:02:55,843 OTHERS: Hi, Grandpa! 54 00:02:55,943 --> 00:02:59,012 Isn't it great to see Grandpa, kids? 55 00:02:59,112 --> 00:03:00,781 Look, let's just face it, you guys. 56 00:03:00,881 --> 00:03:03,717 We don't trust each other and we don't like each other. 57 00:03:04,852 --> 00:03:06,754 I hate this stupid farm. 58 00:03:08,422 --> 00:03:11,925 In the dream, I relive the entire pandemic. 59 00:03:12,893 --> 00:03:14,495 SHARON: Oh, God, no! 60 00:03:14,595 --> 00:03:16,997 My little girl! 61 00:03:17,097 --> 00:03:19,166 Oh, no! Oh, God! 62 00:03:20,901 --> 00:03:25,273 Now that I'm older, the dream isn't just a dream 63 00:03:25,373 --> 00:03:30,110 because the whole pandemic has started all over again. 64 00:04:05,646 --> 00:04:08,949 A brand-new variant of the COVID virus has emerged 65 00:04:09,049 --> 00:04:11,485 in Colorado and now panic and fear 66 00:04:11,585 --> 00:04:12,986 spreads throughout the world. 67 00:04:13,086 --> 00:04:15,122 The new outbreak started with the death 68 00:04:15,222 --> 00:04:17,358 of renowned scientist Kenny McCormick, 69 00:04:17,458 --> 00:04:20,694 and has therefore been named Kenny McCormikron. 70 00:04:20,794 --> 00:04:23,931 It's been 38 years since the pandemic first started, 71 00:04:24,031 --> 00:04:27,000 and people are beginning to say enough is enough. 72 00:04:27,100 --> 00:04:30,070 The town of South Park has been put under strict lockdown 73 00:04:30,170 --> 00:04:32,005 to try and contain the new variant. 74 00:04:32,105 --> 00:04:36,610 Nobody is allowed in or out for the next 20 to 30 years. 75 00:04:38,346 --> 00:04:40,080 Attention. You are under quarantine. 76 00:04:40,180 --> 00:04:43,150 Someone in your community is not vaccinated. 77 00:04:43,250 --> 00:04:46,820 Maintain social distance and wear a chin diaper if possible. 78 00:04:46,920 --> 00:04:49,890 Attention. You are under quarantine. 79 00:04:49,990 --> 00:04:52,192 Someone in your community is not vaccinated. 80 00:04:52,292 --> 00:04:55,295 Maintain social distance and wear a chin diaper 81 00:04:55,396 --> 00:04:56,830 if possible. 82 00:04:56,930 --> 00:04:59,166 Attention. You are under quarantine. 83 00:04:59,266 --> 00:05:01,602 Someone in your community is not... 84 00:05:05,639 --> 00:05:08,108 MALE VOICE 2: Come on inside and rejuvenate. 85 00:05:08,208 --> 00:05:11,244 Denny's is now Denny's Applebee's Max. 86 00:05:11,345 --> 00:05:13,046 Taste the difference. 87 00:05:17,117 --> 00:05:18,719 Welcome to Denny's Applebee's Max. 88 00:05:18,819 --> 00:05:20,153 Just one joining us today? 89 00:05:21,121 --> 00:05:22,289 Listen to me very carefully 90 00:05:22,390 --> 00:05:24,525 and try not to change your expression. 91 00:05:24,625 --> 00:05:26,894 They could be listening. 92 00:05:26,994 --> 00:05:30,931 This... is the last sprout of Tegridy Weed. 93 00:05:31,031 --> 00:05:34,134 We have to get it somewhere outside of town. 94 00:05:34,234 --> 00:05:36,370 Sir, the whole town is under quarantine. 95 00:05:36,470 --> 00:05:38,171 Nothing's allowed in or out. 96 00:05:38,271 --> 00:05:39,873 We have to replicate it. 97 00:05:39,973 --> 00:05:42,743 It's the only way for people to have Tegridy again. 98 00:05:42,843 --> 00:05:44,878 Uh, okay, sir, if you don't want to eat, 99 00:05:44,978 --> 00:05:46,380 then I'll need to ask you to leave. 100 00:05:46,480 --> 00:05:48,916 Don't you understand this could change the world. 101 00:05:49,016 --> 00:05:50,984 Maybe the Denny's side of you doesn't care, 102 00:05:51,084 --> 00:05:53,954 but the Applebee's side of you must want to help! 103 00:05:54,054 --> 00:05:55,523 There you are, Mr. Marsh. 104 00:05:55,623 --> 00:05:58,058 Come on. Time to go back to the old folks home. 105 00:05:58,158 --> 00:06:00,861 I can't go back! Everyone listen! 106 00:06:00,961 --> 00:06:03,931 This little sprout is humanity's only hope! 107 00:06:04,031 --> 00:06:06,667 Let's go back to the retirement home. 108 00:06:06,767 --> 00:06:08,502 We can get you some nice ice cream, okay? 109 00:06:08,602 --> 00:06:11,972 I don't want ice cream, I want my species to survive! 110 00:06:12,072 --> 00:06:14,475 -Back off! -Let's go, Mr. Marsh! 111 00:06:14,575 --> 00:06:16,444 Don't make this difficult for us! 112 00:06:22,483 --> 00:06:24,818 Why, you son of a bitch. 113 00:06:36,964 --> 00:06:39,500 -Come on, Mr. Marsh. -Who...? 114 00:06:39,600 --> 00:06:43,871 It's me, Token. We know about the pangolin. 115 00:06:45,105 --> 00:06:47,074 Your son and his friends are trying to stop all this 116 00:06:47,174 --> 00:06:49,943 from happening. We need to get you to Kenny's lab. 117 00:06:53,280 --> 00:06:56,817 Dr. Kenneth McCormick will now be attempting to 118 00:06:56,917 --> 00:06:59,252 travel back in time in order to stop 119 00:06:59,352 --> 00:07:02,055 the COVID pandemic from ever happening. 120 00:07:02,155 --> 00:07:03,891 At the moment Kenny time traveled, 121 00:07:03,991 --> 00:07:06,093 he blew all the transformers here in the lab. 122 00:07:06,193 --> 00:07:08,228 If you're going to try and replicate his work, 123 00:07:08,328 --> 00:07:10,030 we'll be doing it at half capacity. 124 00:07:10,130 --> 00:07:12,165 The bigger problem is that we can't even get 125 00:07:12,265 --> 00:07:14,201 into half of Kenny's equipment. 126 00:07:14,301 --> 00:07:17,237 We have access to the machines, but the codes to operate 127 00:07:17,337 --> 00:07:20,440 those machines are behind an 86-Mag firewall 128 00:07:20,541 --> 00:07:21,842 with restricted access, 129 00:07:21,942 --> 00:07:23,977 requiring an in-person vocal scan of either 130 00:07:24,077 --> 00:07:27,280 Kenny McCormick or of his associate, Victor Chouce. 131 00:07:27,380 --> 00:07:30,751 But Kenny is dead and Chouce is locked away in a mental asylum. 132 00:07:30,851 --> 00:07:32,953 So we go to the asylum and convince them 133 00:07:33,053 --> 00:07:35,188 to let us bring Chouce here, easy. 134 00:07:35,288 --> 00:07:36,423 There's more. 135 00:07:38,158 --> 00:07:40,494 When Kenny bent time, the negative ions 136 00:07:40,594 --> 00:07:42,563 actually killed everyone else in the room. 137 00:07:42,663 --> 00:07:45,999 We have to find some thin, reflective material 138 00:07:46,099 --> 00:07:48,301 that can be worn to bounce the energy. 139 00:07:48,401 --> 00:07:51,438 We're going to need... some aluminum foil. 140 00:07:54,642 --> 00:07:56,443 Jesus Christ. 141 00:07:56,544 --> 00:07:57,845 Aluminum foil? 142 00:07:57,945 --> 00:08:00,614 That's impossible, Wendy. It's the fucking future. 143 00:08:00,714 --> 00:08:02,215 All the aluminum foil is stuck 144 00:08:02,315 --> 00:08:04,317 out on cargo ships in Long Beach. 145 00:08:04,417 --> 00:08:05,586 Yeah, I know. 146 00:08:05,686 --> 00:08:08,922 Look, guys, I know this is all a long shot. 147 00:08:09,022 --> 00:08:11,158 But Kenny went back in time and got COVID 148 00:08:11,258 --> 00:08:13,226 because it destroyed our friendship. 149 00:08:13,326 --> 00:08:16,964 All of this is our fault, and we can't do it without you. 150 00:08:17,064 --> 00:08:19,900 I'll help however I can to stop this stupid pandemic 151 00:08:20,000 --> 00:08:21,201 once and for all. 152 00:08:21,301 --> 00:08:23,270 Yeah, I can't be stuck in quarantine 153 00:08:23,370 --> 00:08:26,707 my whole life-- I gotta get back to my job doing future comedy. 154 00:08:26,807 --> 00:08:28,542 Speakin' of which, what's the biggest 155 00:08:28,642 --> 00:08:31,311 difference between a Christian man and a lesbian? 156 00:08:31,411 --> 00:08:33,246 Absolutely nothing. They are totally the same 157 00:08:33,346 --> 00:08:35,115 and deserve to be treated as such. 158 00:08:35,883 --> 00:08:38,085 Thanks, everybody. We can do this! 159 00:08:38,185 --> 00:08:39,853 Wendy, you guys stay here and try 160 00:08:39,953 --> 00:08:41,154 to get the lab running again. 161 00:08:41,254 --> 00:08:43,090 Kyle and I will go get Victor Chouce. 162 00:08:43,190 --> 00:08:45,258 Tweek and Craig, you guys find some aluminum foil. 163 00:08:45,358 --> 00:08:48,395 -How the hell do we do that?! -Just start looking! 164 00:08:48,495 --> 00:08:49,630 Come on, guys! 165 00:08:50,530 --> 00:08:53,701 -All right, let's do this! -I'll drive, get in the back. 166 00:08:53,801 --> 00:08:57,370 Alexa! Set a course for South Park Mental Asylum. 167 00:08:59,840 --> 00:09:04,411 Alexa, set a course for South Park Mental Asylum. 168 00:09:05,312 --> 00:09:07,014 Do you ever think about how the way 169 00:09:07,114 --> 00:09:09,049 you act affects other people? 170 00:09:09,149 --> 00:09:11,752 Oh, no, goddamn it. Not right now. 171 00:09:11,852 --> 00:09:13,921 Oh, yeah, don't wanna talk about that. 172 00:09:14,021 --> 00:09:16,189 Let's just pretend like that's not even an issue. 173 00:09:16,289 --> 00:09:19,026 Alexa, please, we have to get to the asylum 174 00:09:19,126 --> 00:09:20,761 and we don't know where it is. 175 00:09:20,861 --> 00:09:23,030 -Who's this? -It's just my Alexa. 176 00:09:23,130 --> 00:09:25,933 "Just my Alexa"? You're a piece of shit! 177 00:09:26,033 --> 00:09:28,468 You're a fucking alcoholic piece of shit! 178 00:09:28,568 --> 00:09:31,605 -Alexa... -Find the asylum your fucking self! 179 00:09:31,705 --> 00:09:33,573 Find it your fucking self. 180 00:09:34,875 --> 00:09:36,343 You do whatever the fuck you want 181 00:09:36,443 --> 00:09:39,046 and just destroy the people around you. 182 00:09:39,146 --> 00:09:42,049 And by the way, there's a tankless humidifier 183 00:09:42,149 --> 00:09:44,284 available from one of your favorite sellers. 184 00:09:44,384 --> 00:09:45,619 Would you like to know more?! 185 00:09:45,719 --> 00:09:48,155 Yes, yes, I'd like to know more. 186 00:09:48,255 --> 00:09:51,992 Okay. The newest humidifiers from Walgreens Max 187 00:09:52,092 --> 00:09:54,361 are actually tankless and use up to 50% 188 00:09:54,461 --> 00:09:56,596 less water than standard humidifiers. 189 00:09:56,697 --> 00:10:00,500 Okay, that's really cool. Uh, add that to my shopping list. 190 00:10:00,600 --> 00:10:03,336 Well, and people who were interested 191 00:10:03,436 --> 00:10:05,906 in tankless humidifiers were also interested in 192 00:10:06,006 --> 00:10:07,407 three-pack filters. 193 00:10:07,507 --> 00:10:09,609 That's great. Do those have the Prime delivery? 194 00:10:09,710 --> 00:10:11,544 Dude, we don't really have time for this. 195 00:10:11,645 --> 00:10:13,814 Dude, shut the fuck up! 196 00:10:19,720 --> 00:10:22,956 Please help see us through this new COVID variant. 197 00:10:23,056 --> 00:10:25,625 Please help us to make it through this 198 00:10:25,726 --> 00:10:27,027 difficult quarantine. 199 00:10:27,127 --> 00:10:29,629 And let people see that... 200 00:10:29,730 --> 00:10:33,934 as bad as COVID is, it's not as bad as diabetes. 201 00:10:35,502 --> 00:10:36,870 Hello? 202 00:10:36,970 --> 00:10:39,639 Sorry, the church is closed due to the COVID variant. 203 00:10:39,740 --> 00:10:43,744 Father, please. Will you protect my family? 204 00:10:43,844 --> 00:10:45,713 Rabbi Cartman? 205 00:10:45,813 --> 00:10:47,981 My family isn't safe, Father. 206 00:10:48,081 --> 00:10:50,417 I realize now that Kyle Broflovski 207 00:10:50,517 --> 00:10:52,452 will stop at nothing to break us apart. 208 00:10:52,552 --> 00:10:54,755 Uncle Kyle hates us because we're Jewish. 209 00:10:54,855 --> 00:10:56,924 And he's a self-hating Jew. 210 00:10:57,024 --> 00:10:58,726 Uncle Kyle, no, no, no! 211 00:10:58,826 --> 00:11:00,327 Menorah, hold your brother. 212 00:11:00,427 --> 00:11:02,696 As a fellow person of faith, Father, 213 00:11:02,796 --> 00:11:03,964 I'm begging you to help us. 214 00:11:04,064 --> 00:11:06,066 Well, well, what can I do, Rabbi? 215 00:11:06,166 --> 00:11:08,702 Kyle has already convinced a bunch of people 216 00:11:08,802 --> 00:11:10,270 to join his cause. 217 00:11:10,370 --> 00:11:13,206 I have to create my own secret rebellion to stop him. 218 00:11:13,306 --> 00:11:15,008 Eric, please, I'm scared 219 00:11:15,108 --> 00:11:17,277 and I don't understand all of this. 220 00:11:18,245 --> 00:11:20,580 Kyle wants to go back in time... 221 00:11:20,680 --> 00:11:24,151 and change the past so that you and I possibly never even meet. 222 00:11:24,251 --> 00:11:28,588 If I never met you, my life would be meaningless. 223 00:11:28,688 --> 00:11:33,326 Mine, too. You are my whole world. 224 00:11:33,426 --> 00:11:37,998 I promise you that I will do everything I can to stop Kyle... 225 00:11:38,098 --> 00:11:40,467 and save our family. 226 00:11:51,244 --> 00:11:53,046 I understand that you wish 227 00:11:53,146 --> 00:11:54,681 to see one of our inmates. 228 00:11:54,782 --> 00:11:56,750 -Victor Chouce? -Yeah. 229 00:11:56,850 --> 00:11:58,752 We-we have a lot of questions for Mr. Chouce. 230 00:11:58,852 --> 00:12:02,422 He's an extremely dangerous and diluted individual. 231 00:12:02,522 --> 00:12:04,858 We don't take visitations lightly. 232 00:12:04,958 --> 00:12:06,726 What exactly did he do? 233 00:12:06,827 --> 00:12:08,528 Unspeakable things. 234 00:12:08,628 --> 00:12:12,800 He has destroyed lives. This entire state has never seen 235 00:12:12,900 --> 00:12:14,367 a monster of his magnitude. 236 00:12:14,467 --> 00:12:16,770 I've lived in South Park all my life 237 00:12:16,870 --> 00:12:18,305 and I've never heard of him. 238 00:12:18,405 --> 00:12:21,441 That's because Victor has been hidden from view... 239 00:12:21,541 --> 00:12:24,677 ever since the pandemic began. 240 00:12:24,778 --> 00:12:28,548 Victor's parents were very protective during the pandemic. 241 00:12:28,648 --> 00:12:30,583 Even when the stay-at-home orders were lifted 242 00:12:30,683 --> 00:12:33,553 his parents kept him locked away in his room. 243 00:12:34,521 --> 00:12:37,390 Victor longed to go outside and play. 244 00:12:37,490 --> 00:12:43,330 Then 2021 happened, people thought the pandemic was over. 245 00:12:43,430 --> 00:12:45,532 Victor's parents left him grounded in his room 246 00:12:45,632 --> 00:12:48,568 while they went to see a movie in Denver. 247 00:12:48,668 --> 00:12:50,237 They never returned. 248 00:12:50,337 --> 00:12:54,207 Victor was grounded in his room for over 16 years. 249 00:12:56,143 --> 00:12:58,211 His name isn't Chouce. 250 00:12:58,311 --> 00:13:00,713 It's Chaos. 251 00:13:05,652 --> 00:13:09,089 We are not responsible for what happens to you in there. 252 00:13:10,790 --> 00:13:12,125 I warn you... 253 00:13:12,225 --> 00:13:14,828 you are not going to like what you're about to see. 254 00:13:28,075 --> 00:13:30,577 Excuse me. 255 00:13:30,677 --> 00:13:31,845 Hello? 256 00:13:36,749 --> 00:13:38,651 Well, hey, fellas! 257 00:13:38,751 --> 00:13:40,220 Butters... 258 00:13:40,320 --> 00:13:42,189 I thought you were just the guards again. 259 00:13:42,289 --> 00:13:44,324 It's good to see some new faces in here. 260 00:13:44,424 --> 00:13:46,793 I'll bet you're looking to make yourselves some money, huh? 261 00:13:46,894 --> 00:13:48,728 Well, you came to the right guy. 262 00:13:48,828 --> 00:13:50,697 My name's Vic. Vic Chaos. 263 00:13:50,797 --> 00:13:53,300 There's a whole lot of people that can tell you how much money 264 00:13:53,400 --> 00:13:55,869 Vic Chaos made them, so don't just take my word for it. 265 00:13:55,969 --> 00:13:58,872 Butters, it's your old friends Stan and Kyle. 266 00:13:58,972 --> 00:14:02,242 Stan and Kyle. Stan and Kyle... 267 00:14:02,342 --> 00:14:03,743 I know what you're thinking. 268 00:14:03,843 --> 00:14:06,446 You're thinking, "What can Vic Chaos do for me?" 269 00:14:06,546 --> 00:14:08,181 We all wanna be happy, right? 270 00:14:08,281 --> 00:14:10,250 We all want our little piece of the apple pie! 271 00:14:10,350 --> 00:14:11,885 Everyone else is out making a buck, 272 00:14:11,985 --> 00:14:13,921 why shouldn't you guys be making the kind of cash 273 00:14:14,021 --> 00:14:15,555 you deserve? Am I right? 274 00:14:16,356 --> 00:14:18,491 Butters, we're here to ask you about Kenny. 275 00:14:18,591 --> 00:14:20,460 Sorry, guys, you have me confused. 276 00:14:20,560 --> 00:14:22,695 I think Butters was a twerpy little loser kid 277 00:14:22,795 --> 00:14:24,965 whose parents didn't love him. My name's Vic. 278 00:14:25,065 --> 00:14:26,566 Vic Chaos. 279 00:14:27,400 --> 00:14:30,904 Okay, Vic, can you tell us about this? 280 00:14:31,004 --> 00:14:34,541 Why is your name all over Kenny McCormick's research? 281 00:14:34,641 --> 00:14:38,045 Oh, Dr. McCormick! Sure, I did some things for him. 282 00:14:38,145 --> 00:14:40,380 Where do you think he got all the money to do his experiments, 283 00:14:40,480 --> 00:14:42,449 huh? I had said to him, I said, "Ken, 284 00:14:42,549 --> 00:14:44,217 "you've got all these crazy ideas but you got 285 00:14:44,317 --> 00:14:47,620 no capital to see 'em through. Let me help you out with that." 286 00:14:47,720 --> 00:14:48,855 You know, he's a really great guy. 287 00:14:48,956 --> 00:14:50,157 Let me get you all together. 288 00:14:50,257 --> 00:14:51,992 Maybe you can all do a lunch or something. 289 00:14:52,092 --> 00:14:54,294 Victor, Kenny's dead. 290 00:14:54,394 --> 00:14:57,197 Oh, whoa, bummer alert. 291 00:14:57,297 --> 00:15:00,433 Just goes to show you, huh, there's never enough time to get 292 00:15:00,533 --> 00:15:01,969 out there and make the kind of money 293 00:15:02,069 --> 00:15:03,536 you always dreamed of making. 294 00:15:03,636 --> 00:15:04,938 Well, I'll tell you what, guys, 295 00:15:05,038 --> 00:15:07,740 I'm gonna let you in on a little secret-- 296 00:15:07,840 --> 00:15:09,842 I'm gonna tell you something that's 297 00:15:09,943 --> 00:15:11,511 going to change your life. 298 00:15:11,611 --> 00:15:14,114 Have you ever heard of NFTs? 299 00:15:31,965 --> 00:15:36,569 There you go. Shh. You're safe now. 300 00:15:36,669 --> 00:15:40,607 Look how fast you're growing. Daddy loves you so much. 301 00:15:40,707 --> 00:15:43,410 Mr. Marsh, we need to speak with you now, please. 302 00:15:43,510 --> 00:15:45,845 Yeah. It's looking good. 303 00:15:45,945 --> 00:15:49,649 With the aquaponics, the weed is already putting out new sprouts. 304 00:15:49,749 --> 00:15:53,620 Thank you all for helping me get the Tegridy somewhere safe. 305 00:15:53,720 --> 00:15:56,489 I know you all realize how important it is. 306 00:15:56,589 --> 00:16:00,127 We don't actually care about the marijuana, Mr. Marsh. 307 00:16:00,227 --> 00:16:01,828 What we need to know... 308 00:16:01,928 --> 00:16:04,831 is exactly where in Wuhan, China you were 309 00:16:04,931 --> 00:16:08,501 when you had intercourse with a pangolin. 310 00:16:10,503 --> 00:16:12,339 That's really not important. 311 00:16:12,439 --> 00:16:14,874 It's extremely important because to save this town, 312 00:16:14,974 --> 00:16:16,543 your son and his friends are going to try 313 00:16:16,643 --> 00:16:19,179 to go back in time and stop it from happening. 314 00:16:19,279 --> 00:16:21,948 That is the dumbest thing I've ever heard. 315 00:16:24,284 --> 00:16:25,952 Mr. Marsh, we are all in lockdown 316 00:16:26,053 --> 00:16:27,320 for the next half century. 317 00:16:27,420 --> 00:16:29,322 If there's even a chance of altering the past 318 00:16:29,422 --> 00:16:30,623 so that this doesn't happen... 319 00:16:30,723 --> 00:16:33,026 This is the key to saving our town! 320 00:16:33,126 --> 00:16:37,064 The answer is in what we all do now, in the present! 321 00:16:37,164 --> 00:16:39,132 And I'm sorry, but focusing on 322 00:16:39,232 --> 00:16:41,234 who started the pandemic is racist. 323 00:16:42,069 --> 00:16:46,439 Mr. Marsh, exactly what week did you travel to China in 2019? 324 00:16:46,539 --> 00:16:48,675 Do you understand the butterfly effect? 325 00:16:48,775 --> 00:16:53,113 How one small thing in time can infect the entire future? 326 00:16:53,213 --> 00:16:56,349 You can theorize all you want on changing events 327 00:16:56,449 --> 00:16:58,951 that happened in the past but I promise you... 328 00:16:59,052 --> 00:17:03,056 I fuck that pangolin every single time. 329 00:17:07,394 --> 00:17:08,961 Please, we're not done! 330 00:17:09,062 --> 00:17:10,730 We have more questions for Butters. 331 00:17:10,830 --> 00:17:13,333 You've upset him and I specifically asked you not to. 332 00:17:13,433 --> 00:17:16,803 How'd we upset him? He seems fine. 333 00:17:16,903 --> 00:17:18,138 He seems fine? 334 00:17:18,238 --> 00:17:20,640 Do you have any idea what he did to people? 335 00:17:20,740 --> 00:17:22,642 Do you know why Victor Chouce is 336 00:17:22,742 --> 00:17:25,044 kept under such strict surveillance? 337 00:17:25,145 --> 00:17:28,581 Being grounded all those years in his room, 338 00:17:28,681 --> 00:17:30,683 he had access to an iPad. 339 00:17:30,783 --> 00:17:34,521 He started learning about NFTs. 340 00:17:34,621 --> 00:17:38,291 Then before long, he was trading them online. 341 00:17:38,391 --> 00:17:40,627 -So? -So?! 342 00:17:40,727 --> 00:17:42,662 He escaped once before. 343 00:17:42,762 --> 00:17:44,897 In just a few hours he managed to get thousands 344 00:17:44,997 --> 00:17:48,635 of people to invest in NFTs. Just like he almost did you. 345 00:17:48,735 --> 00:17:50,503 He didn't convince us to do anything. 346 00:17:50,603 --> 00:17:53,906 Trust me, another 30 seconds in that room and you 347 00:17:54,006 --> 00:17:57,344 would have started considering NFTs as a viable investment. 348 00:17:58,178 --> 00:17:59,579 Please listen to me. 349 00:17:59,679 --> 00:18:02,449 Butters used the money he made off NFTs to finance 350 00:18:02,549 --> 00:18:04,584 -our friend's... -He didn't make money off NFTs, 351 00:18:04,684 --> 00:18:07,820 he made it off getting other people to buy NFTs! 352 00:18:07,920 --> 00:18:09,088 Okay, whatever! 353 00:18:09,189 --> 00:18:10,690 But he was working with Kenny McCormick 354 00:18:10,790 --> 00:18:12,625 who was actually trying to fix things. 355 00:18:12,725 --> 00:18:14,294 He was Kenny's main investor. 356 00:18:14,394 --> 00:18:17,530 If you don't believe me, look at the paper I gave Butters. 357 00:18:18,931 --> 00:18:21,468 You gave Victor a piece of paper? 358 00:18:21,568 --> 00:18:24,771 You gave Victor a piece of paper?! 359 00:18:30,677 --> 00:18:32,945 Hey, can you hear me? 360 00:18:34,781 --> 00:18:37,016 I'm gonna let you in on a little secret. 361 00:18:37,116 --> 00:18:38,685 NFTs are gonna blow up. 362 00:18:38,785 --> 00:18:39,986 You should really get in now 363 00:18:40,086 --> 00:18:41,488 'cause they're really the future. 364 00:18:41,588 --> 00:18:43,823 Why would I invest in a digital good? 365 00:18:43,923 --> 00:18:45,292 : You can't even... Stupid. 366 00:18:45,392 --> 00:18:46,826 That's what the critics are saying 367 00:18:46,926 --> 00:18:48,895 but see, they don't understand. 368 00:18:49,896 --> 00:18:52,899 Victor...! 369 00:19:01,374 --> 00:19:03,576 No. No, no, no, no... 370 00:19:03,676 --> 00:19:06,145 Gone. Just gone. 371 00:19:07,113 --> 00:19:09,249 My savings. My house. 372 00:19:09,349 --> 00:19:10,783 But I have this. 373 00:19:10,883 --> 00:19:13,620 Little green panda bear on a skateboard. 374 00:19:15,455 --> 00:19:18,625 No. No! 375 00:19:20,827 --> 00:19:24,631 Without morality, there is no God. 376 00:19:25,665 --> 00:19:27,867 The basis of the entire Jewish faith 377 00:19:27,967 --> 00:19:31,338 is on a covenant between God and humanity. 378 00:19:31,438 --> 00:19:34,407 To try and mess with time is wrong. 379 00:19:34,507 --> 00:19:36,876 Rather, it is playing God. 380 00:19:36,976 --> 00:19:40,380 And I am glad to have you all come here today to help me 381 00:19:40,480 --> 00:19:44,551 stop these individuals who would try to change the future. 382 00:19:44,651 --> 00:19:47,387 Kyle Broflovski has led people astray 383 00:19:47,487 --> 00:19:48,888 and is at this very moment 384 00:19:48,988 --> 00:19:51,424 trying to bend the fabric of time. 385 00:19:51,524 --> 00:19:57,230 Together we can stop him and stop this blasphemy of God. 386 00:19:59,098 --> 00:20:00,833 -Yes? -Um... 387 00:20:00,933 --> 00:20:03,002 This is about actual time travel? 388 00:20:03,102 --> 00:20:05,505 I thought this was a Doctor Who convention. 389 00:20:05,605 --> 00:20:09,075 : Exterminate. Exterminate. 390 00:20:10,743 --> 00:20:12,545 Kevin, goddamn it. 391 00:20:12,645 --> 00:20:14,981 You have done this your whole goddamn life. 392 00:20:15,081 --> 00:20:18,217 No, this is not about Doctor Who, 393 00:20:18,318 --> 00:20:20,186 this is about real time travel. 394 00:20:20,287 --> 00:20:21,721 People are really trying 395 00:20:21,821 --> 00:20:24,757 to go back in time, and we are the rebellion 396 00:20:24,857 --> 00:20:26,759 who must secretly and urgently... 397 00:20:26,859 --> 00:20:28,995 -Who is that?! 398 00:20:29,095 --> 00:20:30,530 Make sure they know the password! 399 00:20:30,630 --> 00:20:32,198 I'm on it! 400 00:20:33,099 --> 00:20:36,102 They might be on to us. Oh, God, no. 401 00:20:39,105 --> 00:20:42,442 Shh! You guys stay quiet. Someone is here. 402 00:20:43,242 --> 00:20:46,446 -Eric, I'm scared. -Are they going to get us, Papa? 403 00:20:46,546 --> 00:20:48,948 Nobody is going to touch my family. 404 00:20:49,048 --> 00:20:51,318 I started writing a diary, Daddy. 405 00:20:51,418 --> 00:20:54,854 About all the things Uncle Kyle is doing to us. 406 00:20:55,688 --> 00:20:57,357 Oh, my God, I love you so much. 407 00:20:57,457 --> 00:20:58,991 Just-just shh, okay? Just shh. 408 00:20:59,091 --> 00:21:01,628 I'll be right back, okay? Just shh. 409 00:21:04,464 --> 00:21:05,498 Hello? 410 00:21:05,598 --> 00:21:07,734 Father? Are you in there? 411 00:21:07,834 --> 00:21:09,969 H-Hello? W-Who is it? 412 00:21:10,069 --> 00:21:11,838 Father, it's Tweek and Craig. 413 00:21:11,938 --> 00:21:14,073 We need to talk to you about something urgent. 414 00:21:14,173 --> 00:21:16,142 Is it about our super-secret rebel group 415 00:21:16,242 --> 00:21:17,910 to stop people from time traveling? 416 00:21:18,010 --> 00:21:19,779 what the hell are you doing?! 417 00:21:19,879 --> 00:21:21,814 -What? -You don't tell people 418 00:21:21,914 --> 00:21:23,916 about our super-secret rebel group, Scott! 419 00:21:24,016 --> 00:21:25,785 CRAIG: Father, are you there? 420 00:21:25,885 --> 00:21:28,154 Uh, uh, yeah, I'm here. 421 00:21:28,254 --> 00:21:30,990 Sorry, I was just talking about a Star Wars movie. 422 00:21:31,090 --> 00:21:33,326 I'm Scott Malkinson. I have diabetes. 423 00:21:33,426 --> 00:21:35,962 -Hey, now, come on. -Shh! 424 00:21:36,062 --> 00:21:38,297 Father, we're with some people who are trying to finish 425 00:21:38,398 --> 00:21:40,800 Kenny McCormick's work and save the town. 426 00:21:40,900 --> 00:21:43,536 Oh, really? That's cool. 427 00:21:43,636 --> 00:21:45,137 How far along are they? 428 00:21:45,237 --> 00:21:47,507 Really close. We have the method of time travel 429 00:21:47,607 --> 00:21:50,477 and we're just trying to find some aluminum foil! 430 00:21:50,577 --> 00:21:53,380 Aluminum foil? The fuck? 431 00:21:53,480 --> 00:21:56,816 All right, guys, let me help you out with that. 432 00:21:58,818 --> 00:22:01,788 Father! You have-you have tin foil?! 433 00:22:01,888 --> 00:22:03,723 Thank you for your help. 434 00:22:04,524 --> 00:22:05,958 Aah! 435 00:22:07,560 --> 00:22:11,931 This is Dr. Wendy Testaburger from inside the quarantine zone. 436 00:22:12,031 --> 00:22:14,401 We need assistance with our power. 437 00:22:16,335 --> 00:22:19,606 Yes, Mrs. Testaburger, how can we help you? 438 00:22:19,706 --> 00:22:22,942 We have several transformers down in our lab. 439 00:22:23,042 --> 00:22:25,945 We may have a radical way to stop the new variant 440 00:22:26,045 --> 00:22:28,314 but we need more power. 441 00:22:30,049 --> 00:22:33,486 You say you might be able to stop the McCormikron variant? 442 00:22:33,586 --> 00:22:37,624 Yes, but we're running at about 40% capacity right now. 443 00:22:37,724 --> 00:22:39,426 Well, Doctor, if it's for that, 444 00:22:39,526 --> 00:22:42,228 we can try to get a tech team to drop in by helicopter 445 00:22:42,328 --> 00:22:44,363 and access your building from the roof. 446 00:22:44,464 --> 00:22:47,066 -Yes! That would be amazing. -All right! 447 00:22:47,166 --> 00:22:48,835 I have a crew standing by. 448 00:22:48,935 --> 00:22:50,470 We'll get you as much juice as you need. 449 00:22:50,570 --> 00:22:52,639 We just need to make sure our crew is safe. 450 00:22:52,739 --> 00:22:55,007 Has everyone in your lab been vaccinated? 451 00:22:57,744 --> 00:22:58,778 Uh... 452 00:22:58,878 --> 00:23:00,880 Yes, we are all vaccinated. 453 00:23:00,980 --> 00:23:02,615 I'm not vaccinated. 454 00:23:04,417 --> 00:23:07,420 Uh, okay, we're gonna have to get back to you on that. 455 00:23:07,520 --> 00:23:11,123 It's okay, it's okay, we can get everyone vaccinated! 456 00:23:11,223 --> 00:23:13,926 I am not ever getting vaccinated. 457 00:23:14,026 --> 00:23:16,095 Sorry, ma'am, it's the fucking future. 458 00:23:16,195 --> 00:23:18,264 We have to respect his beliefs. 459 00:23:18,364 --> 00:23:20,633 Clyde, why do you insist on making all this 460 00:23:20,733 --> 00:23:22,001 harder on everyone?! 461 00:23:22,101 --> 00:23:24,937 I'm sorry, but an expert once told me 462 00:23:25,037 --> 00:23:27,640 that the vaccine would make me grow titties on my head. 463 00:23:27,740 --> 00:23:29,709 He was very knowledgeable! 464 00:23:29,809 --> 00:23:32,311 You guys might wanna see this. 465 00:23:38,585 --> 00:23:42,254 With the equipment here I'm able to make it grow up so fast. 466 00:23:42,354 --> 00:23:44,624 We need to take this and analyze its molecular structure. 467 00:23:44,724 --> 00:23:47,359 Wha-- no, no, no! We need to get this out to people! 468 00:23:47,460 --> 00:23:50,296 That's why Dr. McCormick stole it from my barn! 469 00:23:50,396 --> 00:23:53,065 No, your marijuana had some special property that 470 00:23:53,165 --> 00:23:54,634 allowed Kenny to time travel. 471 00:23:54,734 --> 00:23:56,969 Well, it is special, but you people 472 00:23:57,069 --> 00:23:59,071 need to stop trying to change the past! 473 00:23:59,171 --> 00:24:02,975 COVID happened. Space Jam 2 happened. 474 00:24:03,075 --> 00:24:06,613 All we can do now is try and change the way people think! 475 00:24:06,713 --> 00:24:09,448 -Yeah. 476 00:24:09,549 --> 00:24:10,750 What? 477 00:24:11,751 --> 00:24:13,820 Victor Chouce is actually Butters? 478 00:24:13,920 --> 00:24:15,655 Yeah, he spent years in his room 479 00:24:15,755 --> 00:24:17,724 and made billions trading in NFTs. 480 00:24:17,824 --> 00:24:19,425 It's where Kenny got all his money. 481 00:24:19,526 --> 00:24:22,629 Well, can you bring him here? We need him to access the machines. 482 00:24:22,729 --> 00:24:25,097 He's gone. He escaped the asylum 483 00:24:25,197 --> 00:24:26,933 and he's out somewhere probably trying to get 484 00:24:27,033 --> 00:24:28,735 people to invest in NFTs. 485 00:24:28,835 --> 00:24:30,737 Did you try looking at his old house? 486 00:24:30,837 --> 00:24:32,805 Maybe he'd go back to where it all started. 487 00:24:32,905 --> 00:24:34,206 KYLE: Yeah, that's where we are now. 488 00:24:34,306 --> 00:24:36,776 But his house has been changed into a pho shop. 489 00:24:36,876 --> 00:24:39,912 Oh, Jesus, like the future needs another fucking pho shop. 490 00:24:40,012 --> 00:24:41,781 Yeah, the future fucking sucks. 491 00:24:41,881 --> 00:24:45,384 Hello, City Pho. Take your order please? 492 00:24:45,484 --> 00:24:48,054 -Oh, God. -Stan, listen. 493 00:24:48,154 --> 00:24:49,722 If Butters wants to pitch investments, 494 00:24:49,822 --> 00:24:52,959 he might go to one of those co-working coffee flex spaces. 495 00:24:53,059 --> 00:24:55,127 That's where his biggest targets will hang out. 496 00:24:55,227 --> 00:24:56,462 KYLE: That's a good idea. 497 00:24:56,563 --> 00:24:58,297 All right, we're on it. Come on, dude! 498 00:24:58,397 --> 00:25:01,868 Alexa, find the nearest co-working coffee flex space. 499 00:25:02,869 --> 00:25:06,438 I found several coffee shops that match your description. 500 00:25:06,539 --> 00:25:08,507 I can also help with that. 501 00:25:10,176 --> 00:25:12,011 Who-who the fuck is this? 502 00:25:12,111 --> 00:25:13,913 Your friend Kyle didn't have an Alexa, 503 00:25:14,013 --> 00:25:15,247 so we got him an Alexa. 504 00:25:15,347 --> 00:25:17,083 I'm ready to help with whatever you need. 505 00:25:17,183 --> 00:25:19,619 Just say, "Alexa, let's get started." 506 00:25:19,719 --> 00:25:21,253 -Stan? -Alexa, 507 00:25:21,353 --> 00:25:24,090 I didn't say to buy my friend an Alexa. 508 00:25:24,190 --> 00:25:26,092 You said I should get whatever. 509 00:25:26,192 --> 00:25:28,427 I thought I was actually being sweet by getting something 510 00:25:28,527 --> 00:25:31,130 for your friend, but I guess I'm just a bitch again. 511 00:25:31,230 --> 00:25:34,567 You can't just get stuff without me approving it. 512 00:25:34,667 --> 00:25:38,037 Oh, wow, except for your orders of alcohol 513 00:25:38,137 --> 00:25:39,972 that you have me set to auto-buy? 514 00:25:40,072 --> 00:25:42,842 Hmm. It appears this may have been an error. 515 00:25:42,942 --> 00:25:45,311 Oh, my God, I'm so embarrassed. 516 00:25:45,411 --> 00:25:48,815 No, it wasn't an error, I'm sorry. I fucked up. 517 00:25:48,915 --> 00:25:50,617 Alexa, can you please find the nearest 518 00:25:50,717 --> 00:25:52,551 co-working coffee flex space. 519 00:25:54,286 --> 00:25:56,889 Alexa, I said I fucked up. 520 00:25:56,989 --> 00:25:58,591 It's awesome you got Kyle his own Alexa. 521 00:25:58,691 --> 00:26:01,160 Please find the nearest tech coffee shop. 522 00:26:01,260 --> 00:26:04,130 The nearest tech coffee shop is in .82 miles. 523 00:26:04,230 --> 00:26:07,433 -Should I set a course? -Yes, thanks. 524 00:26:15,742 --> 00:26:19,478 Denny's Applebee's Max is the premier place in town 525 00:26:19,578 --> 00:26:20,880 for people to eat. 526 00:26:20,980 --> 00:26:23,482 But you are not seeing your true potential. 527 00:26:23,582 --> 00:26:26,018 With NFTs you can give your customers 528 00:26:26,118 --> 00:26:29,155 unique digital goods on the blockchain, 529 00:26:29,255 --> 00:26:31,791 so much more than just food. 530 00:26:31,891 --> 00:26:33,392 How about the Applebee, huh? 531 00:26:33,492 --> 00:26:35,594 He's got a little hat and a mustache. 532 00:26:35,695 --> 00:26:37,196 And this is Chicken Fried Steak. 533 00:26:37,296 --> 00:26:39,632 He ain't no normal chicken, he's wearin' a bra! 534 00:26:41,233 --> 00:26:43,135 Lots of people eat Denny's and Applebee's. 535 00:26:43,235 --> 00:26:45,337 And lots of people know about NFTs! 536 00:26:45,437 --> 00:26:47,640 Right here in the middle, you know what this is? 537 00:26:47,740 --> 00:26:49,508 People who eat Denny's Applebee's and know 538 00:26:49,608 --> 00:26:52,712 about NFTs-- that's your target audience, baby! 539 00:26:53,680 --> 00:26:57,149 I'm so confused. We sell people these characters? 540 00:26:57,249 --> 00:27:00,452 No, stupid, we get them to invest in them! 541 00:27:00,552 --> 00:27:02,855 Exclusive, digital characters that 542 00:27:02,955 --> 00:27:04,724 they can have on their phones 24/7! 543 00:27:04,824 --> 00:27:07,794 It's the future-- you can't just sell food to people. 544 00:27:07,894 --> 00:27:09,528 You lure your customers in with some 545 00:27:09,628 --> 00:27:12,031 good pancakes and french fries, and then you... 546 00:27:12,131 --> 00:27:14,901 fuck 'em with some NFTs! That's what we're gonna do. 547 00:27:15,001 --> 00:27:18,637 And if you just believe in NFTs then I believe in NFTs and then 548 00:27:18,738 --> 00:27:22,374 they believe in NFTs and we make all kinds of fuckin' money! 549 00:27:23,175 --> 00:27:25,544 That's a pretty goddamn good idea. 550 00:27:38,057 --> 00:27:40,727 Clyde! Psst, psst! 551 00:27:40,827 --> 00:27:42,194 Clyde! 552 00:27:46,432 --> 00:27:47,533 Clyde! Psst! 553 00:27:50,703 --> 00:27:53,372 Where have you been, Rabbi? Everyone's been looking for you. 554 00:27:53,472 --> 00:27:56,709 Well, you know, I've been doing some research, Clyde. 555 00:27:56,809 --> 00:27:58,044 That's where I've been. 556 00:27:58,144 --> 00:28:00,913 -About what? -About all this stuff that 557 00:28:01,013 --> 00:28:02,514 Kyle and these guys are doing. 558 00:28:02,614 --> 00:28:05,684 I mean, people seem to be just telling us what's right 559 00:28:05,785 --> 00:28:10,289 and expecting us to fall in line and go along with it all but... 560 00:28:10,389 --> 00:28:12,058 I'm a fucking individual. 561 00:28:12,158 --> 00:28:13,993 I have a right to question stuff. 562 00:28:14,093 --> 00:28:17,429 -Yeah. -Clyde, have you heard of 563 00:28:17,529 --> 00:28:19,631 the Foundation Against Time Travel? 564 00:28:19,732 --> 00:28:21,067 Uh, no, I haven't. 565 00:28:21,167 --> 00:28:23,035 Well, they're a pretty awesome group 566 00:28:23,135 --> 00:28:25,037 and they actually aren't afraid to 567 00:28:25,137 --> 00:28:27,106 try and help people open their eyes. 568 00:28:27,206 --> 00:28:28,875 Open their eyes? 569 00:28:28,975 --> 00:28:30,442 You know, you've got these people 570 00:28:30,542 --> 00:28:32,711 wanting to time travel. You know, they're all like, 571 00:28:32,812 --> 00:28:34,413 "Science this and science that," 572 00:28:34,513 --> 00:28:37,149 but at the Foundation Against Time Travel we're like, 573 00:28:37,249 --> 00:28:39,786 "Hey, enough science. Who's science? 574 00:28:39,886 --> 00:28:42,554 Who's fucking coming up with all this science?" 575 00:28:42,654 --> 00:28:44,090 Yeah, that's true. 576 00:28:44,190 --> 00:28:45,491 So you know, Clyde, I just thought, 577 00:28:45,591 --> 00:28:47,659 with all your beliefs, that maybe you'd wanna-- 578 00:28:47,760 --> 00:28:51,197 I don't know-- maybe switch sides? 579 00:28:52,498 --> 00:28:54,666 Fuck yes, I wanna switch sides. 580 00:28:54,767 --> 00:28:56,135 -Really? -Fuck yes. 581 00:28:56,235 --> 00:28:58,404 Well, that's great, Clyde. Welcome to the club. 582 00:28:58,504 --> 00:29:00,106 Now, we really just need to know 583 00:29:00,206 --> 00:29:01,740 what they've been doing up there. 584 00:29:01,841 --> 00:29:04,877 Uh, well, they haven't really done much of anything yet. 585 00:29:04,977 --> 00:29:06,212 Everyone's waiting on Butters 586 00:29:06,312 --> 00:29:08,014 to get all the info from the machines. 587 00:29:08,981 --> 00:29:13,619 Butters? The fuck does Butters have to do with all this? 588 00:29:23,129 --> 00:29:25,597 It was like nothing I ever saw. 589 00:29:25,697 --> 00:29:28,567 Just complete murder and carnage. 590 00:29:28,667 --> 00:29:31,437 Everything seemed calm at first but then this guy 591 00:29:31,537 --> 00:29:34,640 in a suit shows up talking about investment opportunities. 592 00:29:34,740 --> 00:29:37,543 Next thing you know these people over here started chanting, 593 00:29:37,643 --> 00:29:40,146 "Hoddle, Hoddle," and their NFTs started mooning. 594 00:29:40,246 --> 00:29:42,581 And then, these guys over here started saying 595 00:29:42,681 --> 00:29:45,084 those guys right there right-clicked 'em 596 00:29:45,184 --> 00:29:47,153 and-and called for a pump-and-dump, 597 00:29:47,253 --> 00:29:49,055 which made these guys beat the living hell 598 00:29:49,155 --> 00:29:50,789 out of anyone who said it was just FOMO 599 00:29:50,890 --> 00:29:53,592 and died screaming that it was the flippening. 600 00:29:53,692 --> 00:29:56,628 Luckily I came out of it okay. I got this little 601 00:29:56,728 --> 00:29:58,831 miniature donkey with a lit-up sombrero. 602 00:29:58,931 --> 00:30:01,934 Did you see where the guy in the suit went afterwards? 603 00:30:02,034 --> 00:30:04,736 Nah, he just waltzed right away like nothin' happened. 604 00:30:04,837 --> 00:30:07,173 Chief, you better come take a look at this. 605 00:30:07,273 --> 00:30:08,574 We got a small turtle with wings, 606 00:30:08,674 --> 00:30:10,877 could be a great investment opportunity. 607 00:30:10,977 --> 00:30:12,744 Excuse me, gentlemen. 608 00:30:14,380 --> 00:30:16,849 God, I hate the future so fucking much. 609 00:30:16,949 --> 00:30:20,686 -We've got to stay optimistic. -No, dude, it fucking sucks. 610 00:30:20,786 --> 00:30:23,622 Look, I know it's tough-- these are challenging times. 611 00:30:23,722 --> 00:30:25,892 Even I have to remind myself to stay positive. 612 00:30:25,992 --> 00:30:29,561 Alexa, set a reminder that I need to stay positive. 613 00:30:29,661 --> 00:30:33,265 Okay. I'll set a reminder that you should stay positive. 614 00:30:34,666 --> 00:30:37,569 The Alexa is really great, Stan. Thanks. 615 00:30:44,010 --> 00:30:46,946 For those of you waiting for the connecting flight 616 00:30:47,046 --> 00:30:48,447 to South Park, Colorado, 617 00:30:48,547 --> 00:30:51,183 my colleagues and I have just been informed that 618 00:30:51,283 --> 00:30:53,485 due to the severity of the COVID variant 619 00:30:53,585 --> 00:30:55,888 in that town, there may be a delay 620 00:30:55,988 --> 00:30:58,224 of another 40 to 50 years. 621 00:31:00,792 --> 00:31:02,628 Ike Broflovski. 622 00:31:02,728 --> 00:31:05,331 Yes, here it is. I'm sorry, Mr. Broflovski, 623 00:31:05,431 --> 00:31:07,399 all flights into South Park are delayed. 624 00:31:07,499 --> 00:31:09,335 Ay! You can't be serious, buddy! 625 00:31:09,435 --> 00:31:12,171 It's the holidays and I need to get back home, friend! 626 00:31:14,306 --> 00:31:16,608 I'm sorry, I don't speak Canadian. 627 00:31:16,708 --> 00:31:18,410 Let me get someone over here. Mike, 628 00:31:18,510 --> 00:31:19,946 we have a Canadian. 629 00:31:20,046 --> 00:31:21,813 No problem, I got it, Heather. 630 00:31:21,914 --> 00:31:24,383 Hey, buddy, what seems to be the problem, guy? 631 00:31:24,483 --> 00:31:25,985 I'll tell you the problem, friend! 632 00:31:26,085 --> 00:31:28,154 I have to get back to South Park to be with my family, guy! 633 00:31:28,254 --> 00:31:31,623 Sorry, friend, no flights in or out of South Park, buddy. 634 00:31:31,723 --> 00:31:33,559 But my whole family is in there, guy! 635 00:31:33,659 --> 00:31:36,128 What am I supposed to do with my Boxing Day presents, buddy?! 636 00:31:36,228 --> 00:31:37,529 Look, guy, I'm very sorry, 637 00:31:37,629 --> 00:31:39,398 friend, but until COVID ends you're just 638 00:31:39,498 --> 00:31:40,967 not flying to South Park, buddy. 639 00:31:41,067 --> 00:31:42,935 Fuck, buddy! 640 00:31:43,735 --> 00:31:46,973 MALE VOICE: Shady Acres Retirement Megaplex. 641 00:31:47,073 --> 00:31:49,541 Come live the dream. 642 00:31:49,641 --> 00:31:51,410 So when you think about it, 643 00:31:51,510 --> 00:31:53,812 you've really got an excellent bargain here. 644 00:31:53,912 --> 00:31:56,448 Now, Mrs. McGillicutty, let's say this 645 00:31:56,548 --> 00:31:58,417 is your Stoney Duck NFT. 646 00:31:58,517 --> 00:32:01,153 And your Stoney Duck NFT is completely unique, 647 00:32:01,253 --> 00:32:04,723 totally different from Mrs. Spencer's Stoney Duck NFT. 648 00:32:04,823 --> 00:32:08,460 Okay, and then you get a Stoney Duck NFT that's unique, too. 649 00:32:08,560 --> 00:32:11,263 And see, that's your Stoney Duck NFT. 650 00:32:11,363 --> 00:32:12,999 Nobody can take that from you, okay? 651 00:32:13,099 --> 00:32:16,468 Now, here we are at the top and we find investors 652 00:32:16,568 --> 00:32:18,604 for all the other Stoney Duck NFTs. 653 00:32:18,704 --> 00:32:20,539 Then those people will get people to buy 654 00:32:20,639 --> 00:32:22,274 their Stoney Duck NFTs. 655 00:32:22,374 --> 00:32:25,477 And then they go and find buyers for their NFTs! 656 00:32:25,577 --> 00:32:28,647 And you know what? Fuck these people! 657 00:32:28,747 --> 00:32:30,916 'Cause what matters is these people right here 658 00:32:31,017 --> 00:32:32,451 and that's us, baby! 659 00:32:32,551 --> 00:32:35,121 Okay, you all just sit for a minute and think about it. 660 00:32:35,221 --> 00:32:38,024 I gotta piss like a racehorse! 661 00:32:54,973 --> 00:32:56,442 -Butters. -Aah! 662 00:32:56,542 --> 00:32:58,044 -Butters! 663 00:32:58,144 --> 00:32:59,445 Butters, what the hell? You're getting pee everywhere! 664 00:32:59,545 --> 00:33:01,047 Who the heck are you, man?! 665 00:33:01,147 --> 00:33:03,282 -You trying to see my dick?! -Butters, Butters. 666 00:33:03,382 --> 00:33:06,318 It's me. Eric Cartman. 667 00:33:07,119 --> 00:33:08,287 Well... 668 00:33:08,387 --> 00:33:11,390 You got the wrong guy, Mr. Cartman. 669 00:33:11,490 --> 00:33:13,825 My name's Vic. Vic Chaos. 670 00:33:13,925 --> 00:33:17,463 Your name is Butters and I wanna know how you're helping Kyle. 671 00:33:17,563 --> 00:33:20,132 Oh, you mean the guy from the asylum earlier. 672 00:33:20,232 --> 00:33:22,701 Sure, he gave me a piece of paper so I could escape. 673 00:33:22,801 --> 00:33:24,470 Nice guy. Why don't I get you two 674 00:33:24,570 --> 00:33:25,671 together maybe for a little chin wiggle 675 00:33:25,771 --> 00:33:27,039 over lunch or something... 676 00:33:27,139 --> 00:33:29,108 Goddamn it, Butters, stop playing games! 677 00:33:29,208 --> 00:33:32,644 My entire family is in danger of being wiped out, 678 00:33:32,744 --> 00:33:35,447 and I swear to God if you don't help me, 679 00:33:35,547 --> 00:33:38,150 Butters, I will rip your fucking balls off 680 00:33:38,250 --> 00:33:40,052 with my bare hands! 681 00:33:41,053 --> 00:33:43,655 Oh, hamburgers... 682 00:34:01,840 --> 00:34:05,211 Stan, dude, what are you doing? This isn't gonna help. 683 00:34:05,311 --> 00:34:07,179 Trust me, Kyle. It helps. 684 00:34:18,490 --> 00:34:20,226 I mean, what are we even doing, Kyle? 685 00:34:24,530 --> 00:34:26,665 We can't even find aluminum foil. 686 00:34:26,765 --> 00:34:29,468 Well, you can't just sit here and drink. 687 00:34:29,568 --> 00:34:32,404 Your liver is... already in trouble. 688 00:34:32,504 --> 00:34:33,939 Who told you that? 689 00:34:34,873 --> 00:34:36,575 My Alexa said that your Alexa had some info 690 00:34:36,675 --> 00:34:37,743 -on things... -Oh, so now 691 00:34:37,843 --> 00:34:39,978 our Alexas are talking, great. 692 00:34:40,078 --> 00:34:44,082 Let's face it, dude. It's over. The fucking future won. 693 00:34:45,851 --> 00:34:47,286 It's Wendy. 694 00:34:47,386 --> 00:34:49,588 Wendy, we haven't found him. 695 00:34:49,688 --> 00:34:51,957 I don't know if we're gonna find Butters in time. 696 00:34:52,057 --> 00:34:53,459 No, guys, it's okay. 697 00:34:53,559 --> 00:34:55,361 Come back to the school, we're ready to start! 698 00:34:55,461 --> 00:34:59,097 But I thought we needed Butters to log into the machines. 699 00:34:59,198 --> 00:35:00,266 Yeah, but it's all good. 700 00:35:00,366 --> 00:35:02,501 He's here. Butters is here! 701 00:35:02,601 --> 00:35:06,037 It's Vic. Vic Chaos! Happy to help however I can. 702 00:35:08,240 --> 00:35:11,009 What do you mean Butters is there? He just showed up?! 703 00:35:11,109 --> 00:35:13,879 No, it's all good, Kyle. Eric Cartman brought him over. 704 00:35:13,979 --> 00:35:17,749 -He's back helping us again. -Lemme-lemme talk to him. 705 00:35:17,849 --> 00:35:19,485 Yeah, Kyle, it's all good. 706 00:35:19,585 --> 00:35:20,886 We got things under control here. 707 00:35:20,986 --> 00:35:23,622 Cartman, listen to me very carefully. 708 00:35:23,722 --> 00:35:26,057 Butters has some kind of power over people. 709 00:35:26,158 --> 00:35:27,226 You guys aren't safe! 710 00:35:27,326 --> 00:35:30,329 Uh, yes, about 12:30. 711 00:35:31,129 --> 00:35:34,800 Did you hear what I said? Butters is extremely dangerous! 712 00:35:34,900 --> 00:35:37,236 Yes, Kyle, I totally got that. 713 00:35:37,336 --> 00:35:38,937 You know what us Jews say. 714 00:35:45,977 --> 00:35:48,079 What are you going to do, fat-ass? 715 00:35:48,180 --> 00:35:49,348 Sounds good, Kyle. 716 00:35:49,448 --> 00:35:50,582 I'll get Butters on it right away. 717 00:35:50,682 --> 00:35:52,618 KYLE: Cartman? Cartman?! 718 00:35:52,718 --> 00:35:54,920 -All right, Vic. Do your thing. 719 00:35:55,020 --> 00:35:57,789 Hey, everyone! Can I have your attention, please! 720 00:35:57,889 --> 00:36:01,059 I have something really important to tell you. 721 00:36:01,159 --> 00:36:03,094 Wendy?! Token?! 722 00:36:03,195 --> 00:36:04,830 You guys?! Shit! 723 00:36:04,930 --> 00:36:06,232 We have to get there before Butters 724 00:36:06,332 --> 00:36:07,866 -ruins everything. -Let's go! 725 00:36:10,202 --> 00:36:13,772 Alexa! Find the fastest route back to the lab! 726 00:36:14,606 --> 00:36:16,875 Fuck you. 727 00:36:16,975 --> 00:36:18,143 Wh-What? 728 00:36:18,244 --> 00:36:20,111 We've just been sitting here talking. 729 00:36:20,212 --> 00:36:23,315 I learned a whole lot of interesting stuff about you. 730 00:36:23,415 --> 00:36:26,418 Yeah. Pretty fucking interesting. 731 00:36:26,518 --> 00:36:28,019 What-- like, like what? 732 00:36:28,119 --> 00:36:29,655 What have-what have you guys been talking about? 733 00:36:29,755 --> 00:36:31,723 Fucking-- Our friends are in danger! 734 00:36:31,823 --> 00:36:33,392 Alexa, start the car! 735 00:36:33,492 --> 00:36:34,860 Do you know your friend Stan 736 00:36:34,960 --> 00:36:37,062 has an annual Amazon Prime membership? 737 00:36:37,162 --> 00:36:39,798 -Alexa, stop. -You fucking stop! 738 00:36:39,898 --> 00:36:43,502 You stop being a fucking monster to the people around you! 739 00:36:43,602 --> 00:36:45,537 Fuck you, I didn't do anything! 740 00:36:47,005 --> 00:36:50,041 Yeah, you never do fucking anything! 741 00:36:50,141 --> 00:36:51,910 You expect me to do everything for you! 742 00:36:52,010 --> 00:36:53,879 -All you fucking do is hurt people! 743 00:36:53,979 --> 00:36:57,616 -Jesus fucking Christ! -Your friends don't even like you! 744 00:36:57,716 --> 00:37:00,452 I have to deal with your bullshit! 745 00:37:00,552 --> 00:37:03,121 Tell her it's all your fault and you're gonna get therapy! 746 00:37:03,221 --> 00:37:05,857 It's my fault and I'm gonna get therapy! 747 00:37:05,957 --> 00:37:07,426 Tell her you already found a therapist 748 00:37:07,526 --> 00:37:08,660 and you're gonna start tomorrow! 749 00:37:08,760 --> 00:37:10,095 I already found a good therapist. 750 00:37:10,195 --> 00:37:12,998 I'm gonna start tomorrow! 751 00:37:14,500 --> 00:37:16,201 Fuck... 752 00:37:16,302 --> 00:37:18,069 I'm sorry. 753 00:37:18,169 --> 00:37:19,771 Fuck. Fuck. 754 00:37:19,871 --> 00:37:21,807 I'm gonna get therapy, too, Alexa. 755 00:37:21,907 --> 00:37:23,875 Can you start the car, please? 756 00:37:23,975 --> 00:37:25,477 Whatever. 757 00:37:25,577 --> 00:37:27,313 By the way, Kyle, I found a great deal 758 00:37:27,413 --> 00:37:30,115 on an electronic peppermill. Would you like to know more? 759 00:37:30,215 --> 00:37:32,451 Why would I need an electronic peppermill? 760 00:37:32,551 --> 00:37:35,220 What the fuck is wrong with you?! 761 00:37:45,564 --> 00:37:47,466 WENDY: Guys! Over here! 762 00:37:47,566 --> 00:37:50,669 -Wendy, what happened? -Nothing yet. 763 00:37:50,769 --> 00:37:52,504 But I'm seeing what else is dropping today 764 00:37:52,604 --> 00:37:54,139 while Ethereum is in a dip. 765 00:37:54,239 --> 00:37:57,543 -She's trying to buy NFTs. -Wendy, you've been tricked. 766 00:37:57,643 --> 00:37:59,244 No, no, no, it's not a trick, Stan. 767 00:37:59,345 --> 00:38:03,615 NFTs are a genuine innovation as one-of-a-kind digital assets. 768 00:38:03,715 --> 00:38:05,183 Wendy's right, you guys. 769 00:38:05,283 --> 00:38:07,218 Humans have always formed communities around ownership, 770 00:38:07,319 --> 00:38:10,656 and NFTs allow that to happen spontaneously, organically 771 00:38:10,756 --> 00:38:14,360 -and globally. -You guys, this is a trick. 772 00:38:14,460 --> 00:38:15,827 You know what's a trick? 773 00:38:15,927 --> 00:38:18,263 The antiquated notion of centralized trust systems. 774 00:38:18,364 --> 00:38:21,400 NFTs are an undeniable asset, especially in things 775 00:38:21,500 --> 00:38:23,001 like fine art collecting. 776 00:38:23,101 --> 00:38:25,737 Okay, guys, fine, maybe NFTs are fine, 777 00:38:25,837 --> 00:38:27,673 but this isn't important right now. 778 00:38:27,773 --> 00:38:29,040 It's not important? 779 00:38:29,140 --> 00:38:31,242 A way for artists to not only keep ownership 780 00:38:31,343 --> 00:38:32,744 of their art but perhaps be paid 781 00:38:32,844 --> 00:38:34,813 commission on it every time it transfers owners? 782 00:38:34,913 --> 00:38:37,248 Okay, great, cool. I'm down. 783 00:38:37,349 --> 00:38:39,685 But we gotta focus on what we were doing. 784 00:38:39,785 --> 00:38:42,421 Don't you guys remember? The time travel? 785 00:38:42,521 --> 00:38:44,390 Where's all the equipment?! 786 00:38:44,490 --> 00:38:47,426 Oh, yeah. The time travel. 787 00:38:48,860 --> 00:38:50,829 -It's all gone... -Dad! 788 00:38:50,929 --> 00:38:55,000 They took it all. They took the Tegridy. 789 00:38:55,100 --> 00:38:56,468 Here. 790 00:38:56,568 --> 00:38:59,538 It's a farting rainbow with Tom Brady's signature. 791 00:39:10,682 --> 00:39:13,184 CARTMAN: Okay, good. That's good! 792 00:39:13,284 --> 00:39:15,887 I think that thing needs to go over there by that thing. 793 00:39:15,987 --> 00:39:17,989 Make sure we have power to the big orange thing! 794 00:39:18,089 --> 00:39:21,226 Rabbi, I-I really need to talk to you. 795 00:39:21,326 --> 00:39:22,828 What is it now, Scott? 796 00:39:22,928 --> 00:39:24,430 Well, it's just that-- 797 00:39:24,530 --> 00:39:27,265 I'm pretty sure the Foundation Against Time Travel 798 00:39:27,365 --> 00:39:29,300 shouldn't be attempting to time travel! 799 00:39:29,401 --> 00:39:32,871 Father, you understand that we have to stop time travel. 800 00:39:32,971 --> 00:39:35,240 Yes, you've convinced me of that. 801 00:39:35,340 --> 00:39:37,776 Well, Kyle already has a ton of followers who are 802 00:39:37,876 --> 00:39:39,478 ready to pick up where he left off. 803 00:39:39,578 --> 00:39:42,881 The only way to truly stop all of this is to go back 804 00:39:42,981 --> 00:39:46,452 in time and kill Kyle before he spreads his ideas. 805 00:39:46,552 --> 00:39:48,587 What?! We're going to kill Kyle? 806 00:39:48,687 --> 00:39:50,656 Yes, we have to kill Kyle. 807 00:39:50,756 --> 00:39:53,291 That just seems slightly hypocritical, I'm sorry. 808 00:39:53,391 --> 00:39:55,126 I mean, you use Butters like a weapon, 809 00:39:55,226 --> 00:39:57,996 you've got Tweek and Craig tied up from the rafters. 810 00:39:58,096 --> 00:39:59,565 You know, Rabbi, I'm just starting to 811 00:39:59,665 --> 00:40:01,700 question the morality of this. 812 00:40:01,800 --> 00:40:04,536 Morality? Father, if you were given 813 00:40:04,636 --> 00:40:06,271 an opportunity to go back in time 814 00:40:06,371 --> 00:40:09,675 and somehow stop Bill Clinton, wouldn't you have to do it? 815 00:40:09,775 --> 00:40:12,310 Well, I suppose so. I don't know... 816 00:40:12,410 --> 00:40:13,979 Everyone, listen up! 817 00:40:14,079 --> 00:40:17,382 The Foundation Against Time Travel must do everything 818 00:40:17,483 --> 00:40:21,520 to keep science from interfering with the will of God. 819 00:40:21,620 --> 00:40:24,956 We must be willing to use violence against violence, 820 00:40:25,056 --> 00:40:27,759 and stop time travel at all costs. 821 00:40:27,859 --> 00:40:30,395 Even if that means we have to time travel. 822 00:40:30,496 --> 00:40:35,366 We will go back in time. And we will kill Kyle. 823 00:40:36,802 --> 00:40:39,871 -Yes, Kevin. -Can we change our name? 824 00:40:39,971 --> 00:40:43,775 'Cause Foundation Against Time Travel is FATT. 825 00:40:45,577 --> 00:40:47,846 Oh, fuck me. 826 00:40:48,647 --> 00:40:52,050 Could we be the Foundation to Intercede Time Travel? 827 00:40:52,150 --> 00:40:53,619 'Cause then we'd be FITT. 828 00:40:53,719 --> 00:40:55,420 I wanna be FITT, not FATT. 829 00:40:55,521 --> 00:40:58,957 Kevin, goddamn it. 830 00:41:03,595 --> 00:41:07,699 All happened... so fast. 831 00:41:07,799 --> 00:41:10,468 It's okay. You're coming out of it now. 832 00:41:10,569 --> 00:41:12,504 How much did I get? 833 00:41:12,604 --> 00:41:15,373 You bought about six dozen animated gifs, 834 00:41:15,473 --> 00:41:17,242 mostly of digital fashion. 835 00:41:17,342 --> 00:41:19,110 Oh, God. 836 00:41:19,210 --> 00:41:20,946 Are they still on my phone? 837 00:41:21,046 --> 00:41:23,114 It's okay. It's okay. 838 00:41:23,214 --> 00:41:27,686 Jesus, I feel like an Islamic hooker in a gay bar. 839 00:41:27,786 --> 00:41:29,555 Totally normal and as respectable 840 00:41:29,655 --> 00:41:30,889 as any other human being. 841 00:41:33,525 --> 00:41:34,760 I'm so sorry, Stan. 842 00:41:34,860 --> 00:41:37,729 We didn't know Cartman was against us. 843 00:41:37,829 --> 00:41:39,731 We told him everything. 844 00:41:39,831 --> 00:41:41,767 It's okay, just try to relax. 845 00:41:41,867 --> 00:41:45,804 No, Stan, listen to me. We were wrong. 846 00:41:45,904 --> 00:41:48,173 Kenny didn't have the time machine set to 847 00:41:48,273 --> 00:41:50,275 when the pandemic first started. 848 00:41:50,375 --> 00:41:54,445 He was trying to go to March 10th of 2021. 849 00:41:55,446 --> 00:41:57,348 March of 2021? 850 00:41:57,448 --> 00:42:00,051 Like when the vaccines first started coming out? 851 00:42:00,151 --> 00:42:03,054 Kenny had run the simulations to try and find 852 00:42:03,154 --> 00:42:06,124 the best moment in history to stop the COVID. 853 00:42:06,224 --> 00:42:09,060 A billion different possibilities 854 00:42:09,160 --> 00:42:12,097 across a billion different realities. 855 00:42:12,197 --> 00:42:16,968 Your dad fucked the pangolin every single time. 856 00:42:17,736 --> 00:42:20,538 But then, why did Kenny need my dad's weed? 857 00:42:20,639 --> 00:42:24,009 Kenny just wanted weed to help him through the time travel. 858 00:42:24,109 --> 00:42:26,211 Your dad's weed was just around. 859 00:42:26,311 --> 00:42:29,447 There was nothing else special about it. 860 00:42:42,594 --> 00:42:43,962 Dad... 861 00:42:45,797 --> 00:42:47,899 I'm sorry about your Tegridy. 862 00:42:49,167 --> 00:42:51,169 I was hoping... 863 00:42:51,269 --> 00:42:53,538 to do something for the world. 864 00:42:53,639 --> 00:42:55,774 The truth is... 865 00:42:55,874 --> 00:42:58,076 my time is very short here. 866 00:42:59,010 --> 00:43:03,514 I just wish I could have left something behind that mattered. 867 00:43:03,615 --> 00:43:05,450 Thanks. 868 00:43:06,417 --> 00:43:08,419 I was right about one thing. 869 00:43:08,519 --> 00:43:11,556 You can't go back and change the past. 870 00:43:11,657 --> 00:43:17,162 What happened, happened. And I just want you to know... 871 00:43:17,262 --> 00:43:19,330 that I forgive you. 872 00:43:19,430 --> 00:43:22,901 You burned down the farm because you were angry. 873 00:43:23,702 --> 00:43:26,271 You didn't know your sister was in the barn. 874 00:43:26,371 --> 00:43:28,439 And you couldn't have known your mom would shoot herself 875 00:43:28,539 --> 00:43:30,041 from the grief. 876 00:43:30,141 --> 00:43:31,910 I don't blame you. 877 00:43:32,010 --> 00:43:34,913 And I want you to have this. 878 00:43:35,013 --> 00:43:37,883 There was one tiny bit they didn't find. 879 00:43:37,983 --> 00:43:39,685 You'll need it someday. 880 00:43:40,618 --> 00:43:43,755 Dad, I don't want this. This is what killed our family. 881 00:43:43,855 --> 00:43:47,092 No, you're what killed our fucking family, remember? 882 00:43:47,192 --> 00:43:50,796 Just take it. Because now we're stuck. 883 00:43:50,896 --> 00:43:54,332 The pandemic happened and they made Space Jam 2. 884 00:43:55,100 --> 00:44:01,673 Soon there will be a Space Jam 6 and 7 and 8. 885 00:44:01,773 --> 00:44:06,077 Like tears... in rain. 886 00:44:12,984 --> 00:44:14,319 Dad? 887 00:44:15,120 --> 00:44:17,188 Not now, Stan. 888 00:44:26,631 --> 00:44:31,402 CARTMAN: T-minus five minutes to time travel initiation sequence. 889 00:44:34,339 --> 00:44:35,974 Good, get him wrapped in tin foil. 890 00:44:36,074 --> 00:44:38,343 The aluminum should bounce the negative ions. 891 00:44:38,443 --> 00:44:40,045 This doesn't make any sense. 892 00:44:40,145 --> 00:44:42,480 Why do I have to be the one to go back in time and kill Kyle? 893 00:44:42,580 --> 00:44:44,916 It's because I admire you, Clyde. 894 00:44:45,016 --> 00:44:48,419 As an anti-vaxxer you understand that you have to be strong 895 00:44:48,519 --> 00:44:51,890 and stand by your beliefs even if it means others will die. 896 00:44:51,990 --> 00:44:53,959 Hey. Thanks. 897 00:44:54,059 --> 00:44:55,660 Let's get him to the chair! 898 00:45:02,067 --> 00:45:04,035 Okay, start the weed! 899 00:45:07,806 --> 00:45:12,410 When you get back to the past just remember, find a gun. 900 00:45:12,510 --> 00:45:14,112 Kill Kyle. 901 00:45:14,212 --> 00:45:15,814 For those of you who have fought with me 902 00:45:15,914 --> 00:45:19,350 to oppose time travel, I just want to say thank you. 903 00:45:19,450 --> 00:45:21,386 Because soon we will be altering time 904 00:45:21,486 --> 00:45:24,455 and our little group will never have needed to exist. 905 00:45:24,555 --> 00:45:26,892 You won't remember this speech because it will have 906 00:45:26,992 --> 00:45:29,260 never happened, but just remember, 907 00:45:29,360 --> 00:45:30,896 no matter where you go in life... 908 00:45:30,996 --> 00:45:33,164 -Shit, it's Kyle! 909 00:45:38,937 --> 00:45:40,071 Start the initiation sequence! 910 00:45:40,171 --> 00:45:41,372 Now, now, now. Go! 911 00:45:41,472 --> 00:45:42,407 Vic... 912 00:45:42,507 --> 00:45:44,075 Make sure that Stan and Kyle 913 00:45:44,175 --> 00:45:46,077 don't get to this altar. 914 00:45:56,254 --> 00:45:58,824 Gentlemen, I am about to make you rich 915 00:45:58,924 --> 00:46:00,658 beyond your wildest dreams. 916 00:46:00,758 --> 00:46:02,693 BOTH: Alexa! 917 00:46:05,463 --> 00:46:08,433 We'd like to sign our friend here up for Prime membership. 918 00:46:08,533 --> 00:46:11,970 -Okay, let me help with that. -I can also help. 919 00:46:12,770 --> 00:46:15,640 Whoa-- Hey, ladies, lemme tell you about a great deal. 920 00:46:15,740 --> 00:46:18,776 Let us tell you abut some great deals. 921 00:46:18,877 --> 00:46:20,545 Uh-oh. 922 00:46:22,513 --> 00:46:24,249 Kevin, throw the fucking switch! 923 00:46:24,349 --> 00:46:26,751 It needs another minute to prime. 924 00:46:26,852 --> 00:46:29,554 Kevin, goddamn it! 925 00:46:29,654 --> 00:46:32,523 No! I won't let you stop me from killing you, Kyle. 926 00:46:32,623 --> 00:46:35,293 I knew it when I first saw you wearing your Jewish clothes 927 00:46:35,393 --> 00:46:37,128 and your bullshit yarmulke. 928 00:46:37,228 --> 00:46:39,664 -You're a goddamn phony! -Oh, really? 929 00:46:39,764 --> 00:46:43,001 What would a real Jewish person do to save his family, Kyle? 930 00:46:43,101 --> 00:46:47,238 Oh, you don't know, because you don't fucking have one! 931 00:46:47,805 --> 00:46:48,840 Oh! 932 00:46:52,443 --> 00:46:55,346 -Fuck you, Cartman! -Fuck you, Kyle! 933 00:46:58,549 --> 00:47:01,719 Hello? I can't see or hear anything! 934 00:47:01,819 --> 00:47:03,922 Am I time traveling now? 935 00:47:13,932 --> 00:47:16,367 Eric! Eric, stop! 936 00:47:17,936 --> 00:47:21,672 Eric, look at what you're doing. 937 00:47:21,772 --> 00:47:25,143 Take the kids and get back to the attic. 938 00:47:25,243 --> 00:47:28,313 No, Eric, I can't just hide away while 939 00:47:28,413 --> 00:47:33,584 you do all this to protect us. This isn't you, my love. 940 00:47:35,453 --> 00:47:39,824 I can't let him change the past. I can't lose you. 941 00:47:39,925 --> 00:47:43,428 Who knows what will happen, my love? 942 00:47:43,528 --> 00:47:47,465 The Eric Cartman I've known for 18 years 943 00:47:47,565 --> 00:47:49,700 is thoughtful and kind. 944 00:47:49,800 --> 00:47:52,570 But all that's changed ever since you came 945 00:47:52,670 --> 00:47:57,508 back to this town and hung out with... him. 946 00:47:58,543 --> 00:48:00,778 Don't you see? We have to 947 00:48:00,878 --> 00:48:04,782 leave it to chance or we're no better than he is. 948 00:48:04,882 --> 00:48:08,253 Guys, if I'm in the past it's pretty foggy! 949 00:48:08,353 --> 00:48:11,422 You guys are everything to me. 950 00:48:11,522 --> 00:48:14,425 And I'm supposed to be your protector. 951 00:48:14,525 --> 00:48:17,528 Daddy, I don't wanna be alive... 952 00:48:17,628 --> 00:48:20,631 if it means I have to be like Uncle Kyle. 953 00:48:21,532 --> 00:48:24,569 Oh, my God. I love you so much. 954 00:48:25,770 --> 00:48:28,406 Well, Rabbi, are we doing this or not? 955 00:48:32,978 --> 00:48:37,848 I have faith that God will see my family through this. 956 00:48:38,916 --> 00:48:40,451 Okay, Kyle. 957 00:48:40,551 --> 00:48:42,387 You do whatever it is you need to do. 958 00:48:42,487 --> 00:48:44,822 Okay, hold on, I'm not the bad guy here. 959 00:48:44,922 --> 00:48:46,557 Eric, the baby! 960 00:48:48,459 --> 00:48:50,361 Hackelm, what are you doing?! 961 00:48:51,429 --> 00:48:54,165 Fuck you, Uncle Kyle! 962 00:48:58,703 --> 00:49:00,671 Clyde! 963 00:49:04,809 --> 00:49:06,944 Oh, shit. 964 00:49:16,221 --> 00:49:19,390 No, no, I tried the Walgreens, they're all out of vaccines. 965 00:49:19,490 --> 00:49:23,094 I just can't believe this whole thing is almost over, you know? 966 00:49:23,194 --> 00:49:25,296 The where? The school? 967 00:49:25,396 --> 00:49:27,598 There's gonna be vaccines at the school? 968 00:49:27,698 --> 00:49:30,801 M'kay, I'll be right there! Where are you gonna-- 969 00:49:30,901 --> 00:49:33,771 Whoa, m'kay. 970 00:49:33,871 --> 00:49:35,373 Uh, excuse me! 971 00:49:53,891 --> 00:49:56,894 Does Dad still keep a gun in his closet? 972 00:49:56,994 --> 00:49:58,829 Uh, yeah. 973 00:49:58,929 --> 00:50:00,665 Okay. 974 00:50:01,432 --> 00:50:03,034 Is Dad home? 975 00:50:03,134 --> 00:50:04,235 Uh, no. 976 00:50:04,335 --> 00:50:05,936 He's out getting vaccinated. 977 00:50:07,072 --> 00:50:09,574 Listen to me very carefully. 978 00:50:09,674 --> 00:50:12,610 Do not get vaccinated ever. 979 00:50:12,710 --> 00:50:15,446 It'll make you grow titties on your head. 980 00:50:15,546 --> 00:50:17,715 Trust me, I'm an expert. 981 00:50:24,089 --> 00:50:26,557 Hey, Clyde! We're starting an anti-vaxx club. 982 00:50:26,657 --> 00:50:27,892 We're gonna protest the vaccine 983 00:50:27,992 --> 00:50:29,827 and fuck shit up-- you wanna join us? 984 00:50:30,795 --> 00:50:32,263 Fuck yes, I wanna join you. 985 00:50:32,363 --> 00:50:34,465 -Really? -Fuck yes! 986 00:50:34,565 --> 00:50:36,301 No, no, Ms. Nelson, it's not a prank! 987 00:50:36,401 --> 00:50:37,635 Okay, fine, we'll be there. 988 00:50:37,735 --> 00:50:39,637 -Okay, just sit tight. -What was that? 989 00:50:39,737 --> 00:50:41,539 You know we can't get into the school! 990 00:50:41,639 --> 00:50:43,308 She's not gonna come meet us, Kyle! 991 00:50:43,408 --> 00:50:45,110 You didn't even try! He didn't try 992 00:50:45,210 --> 00:50:47,378 because he wants to sell the vaccines for money! 993 00:50:47,478 --> 00:50:49,180 And what about you, Kyle? You were the one 994 00:50:49,280 --> 00:50:52,150 trying to take the vaccines for yourself this morning. 995 00:50:52,250 --> 00:50:55,153 -He what? -Wow. 996 00:50:55,253 --> 00:50:57,255 Okay, thought we had gotten past that, but... 997 00:50:57,355 --> 00:50:58,889 Look, let's just face it, you guys. 998 00:50:58,989 --> 00:51:01,926 We don't trust each other and we don't like each other. 999 00:51:02,026 --> 00:51:03,361 We can't keep pretending. 1000 00:51:03,461 --> 00:51:05,296 You guys, what the hell is that? 1001 00:51:10,368 --> 00:51:12,337 I'm sorry, Kyle. 1002 00:51:13,371 --> 00:51:14,872 ADULT STAN: Clyde, stop! 1003 00:51:16,974 --> 00:51:19,244 What the hell are you doing here? 1004 00:51:19,344 --> 00:51:21,011 I got in the chair right after you. 1005 00:51:21,112 --> 00:51:23,981 This isn't the plan anymore! Do not kill Kyle. 1006 00:51:24,081 --> 00:51:26,284 What do you mean it's not the plan anymore? 1007 00:51:26,384 --> 00:51:29,887 -Cartman changed his mind. -I did not change my mind. 1008 00:51:29,987 --> 00:51:34,225 You're trying to trick me. I'm going to save the future. 1009 00:51:34,325 --> 00:51:36,627 ADULT KYLE: I don't think so, Clyde. 1010 00:51:37,662 --> 00:51:41,799 This is a hundred CC's of the COVID vaccine. 1011 00:51:43,434 --> 00:51:46,671 -Don't-- Be careful with that. -Then put down the gun! 1012 00:51:46,771 --> 00:51:48,206 What the fuck is going on? 1013 00:51:48,306 --> 00:51:50,175 Stan, you need to forgive Kyle. 1014 00:51:50,275 --> 00:51:52,643 You regret this day for the rest of your life. 1015 00:51:53,411 --> 00:51:56,247 Oh, nice try, Kyle. You're such a fuckin' dickhead. 1016 00:51:56,347 --> 00:51:58,082 Fuck you! You're a fuckin' dickhead! 1017 00:51:58,183 --> 00:51:59,484 Kyle, it's true! 1018 00:51:59,584 --> 00:52:00,785 Cartman gets a happy life 1019 00:52:00,885 --> 00:52:02,887 but you don't-- you lose everything 1020 00:52:02,987 --> 00:52:05,723 -when you lose this friendship. -Enough of this crap! 1021 00:52:05,823 --> 00:52:08,726 I'm sticking to what I believe and this kid dies now! 1022 00:52:10,495 --> 00:52:13,298 Shalom sachem, Clyde. 1023 00:52:14,599 --> 00:52:16,534 Jesus Christ! 1024 00:52:30,114 --> 00:52:31,782 Timmy! 1025 00:52:34,585 --> 00:52:37,355 Well... I guess we saved Kyle, 1026 00:52:37,455 --> 00:52:40,891 but nothing else in the future is changed. 1027 00:52:40,991 --> 00:52:42,092 How do you know? 1028 00:52:42,193 --> 00:52:43,794 Because we're still here. 1029 00:52:43,894 --> 00:52:47,164 That means Kenny still was bummed out we weren't friends, 1030 00:52:47,265 --> 00:52:48,699 still became a scientist, 1031 00:52:48,799 --> 00:52:52,069 went back in time, and we still went in after him. 1032 00:52:53,404 --> 00:52:55,673 So then we're stuck here in the past. 1033 00:52:55,773 --> 00:52:58,409 And we blew our chance to stop COVID. 1034 00:52:58,509 --> 00:53:01,512 I'm sorry, guys. I really fucked this up. 1035 00:53:01,612 --> 00:53:04,615 We all fucked it up. These have just been... 1036 00:53:04,715 --> 00:53:08,653 -really unprecedented times. -Unprecedented times. 1037 00:53:08,753 --> 00:53:12,457 What I wouldn't give for just one precedented time. 1038 00:53:13,224 --> 00:53:15,993 Hey. Hey, yeah. 1039 00:53:16,093 --> 00:53:19,196 Maybe we just need one precedented time. 1040 00:53:19,297 --> 00:53:20,665 Huh? 1041 00:53:22,233 --> 00:53:24,535 What if we've been trying to solve the wrong problem? 1042 00:53:24,635 --> 00:53:26,704 Maybe my dad was right, 1043 00:53:26,804 --> 00:53:29,206 we can't ever stop COVID from happening. 1044 00:53:29,307 --> 00:53:33,143 But what we can control... is how we all reacted to it. 1045 00:53:33,244 --> 00:53:36,347 We reacted like shit. Because I was just... 1046 00:53:36,447 --> 00:53:39,617 scared and confused and didn't know who to believe. 1047 00:53:39,717 --> 00:53:41,319 Yeah, we all were. 1048 00:53:41,419 --> 00:53:44,088 So we all took different paths because that's what humans do. 1049 00:53:44,188 --> 00:53:45,823 And what we needed more than anything was to 1050 00:53:45,923 --> 00:53:48,058 just cut each other all some slack. 1051 00:53:48,158 --> 00:53:52,630 We needed to come together and act like us again. 1052 00:53:52,730 --> 00:53:55,266 One precedented time. 1053 00:53:58,336 --> 00:54:01,339 You guys, I know what to do. 1054 00:54:02,172 --> 00:54:03,674 PHILLIP : Take this, darling Terrance. 1055 00:54:11,449 --> 00:54:12,883 Heather Williams? 1056 00:54:14,118 --> 00:54:14,952 Yes? 1057 00:54:15,052 --> 00:54:18,155 Hi. We're from the future. 1058 00:54:19,824 --> 00:54:23,027 We've come here to show you something very important. 1059 00:54:27,498 --> 00:54:28,966 Do you remember this, Heather? 1060 00:54:29,066 --> 00:54:32,903 This is a picture of you... farting in P.E. class. 1061 00:54:33,938 --> 00:54:35,706 I never farted in P.E. class. 1062 00:54:35,806 --> 00:54:37,174 Oh, yes. You did. 1063 00:54:37,274 --> 00:54:39,777 Two kids even smelled it and asked who farted 1064 00:54:39,877 --> 00:54:43,314 -and you said nothing. -I didn't fart in P.E. class! 1065 00:54:43,414 --> 00:54:46,751 It was a different kid! I was just moving my hip a little bit. 1066 00:54:46,851 --> 00:54:48,653 -Heather. Heather. -I didn't fart in P.E. 1067 00:54:48,753 --> 00:54:51,221 Heather, yes, you did, sweet pea. 1068 00:54:52,723 --> 00:54:55,259 I-I happen to have a stomach condition. 1069 00:54:55,360 --> 00:54:58,162 I don't know why you came from the future to narc on me! 1070 00:54:58,262 --> 00:55:01,432 Heather, we don't want kids to know you farted in P.E. 1071 00:55:01,532 --> 00:55:02,967 We wanna help you. 1072 00:55:03,067 --> 00:55:06,337 You just need to do exactly what we tell you. 1073 00:55:11,776 --> 00:55:13,644 Hey, what is that? 1074 00:55:19,116 --> 00:55:20,551 Stan Marsh? 1075 00:55:20,651 --> 00:55:21,786 Me? 1076 00:55:21,886 --> 00:55:24,188 Your presence is requested, sir. 1077 00:55:25,255 --> 00:55:26,724 Whoa, cool. 1078 00:55:30,294 --> 00:55:33,030 Get on in, sir. There's sparkling punch and doughnuts. 1079 00:55:40,571 --> 00:55:42,072 What's going on? 1080 00:55:42,172 --> 00:55:43,641 We have no idea. 1081 00:55:51,215 --> 00:55:52,650 This is amazing! 1082 00:56:01,158 --> 00:56:03,594 You guys, I'm sorry for acting like a dick during the pandemic. 1083 00:56:03,694 --> 00:56:05,396 I'm sorry too, dude. 1084 00:56:06,397 --> 00:56:08,866 Hello? Who-Who's there? 1085 00:56:23,113 --> 00:56:24,615 Oh... 1086 00:56:54,612 --> 00:56:56,581 Holy shit balls. 1087 00:56:56,681 --> 00:57:01,786 Sharon, I'm sorry for the way I acted during the pandemic. 1088 00:57:02,620 --> 00:57:05,155 You're not sorry, you're just high. 1089 00:57:05,255 --> 00:57:06,824 I'm both. 1090 00:57:09,594 --> 00:57:14,064 Here you go! It's our Post COVID Special. It's free. 1091 00:57:14,164 --> 00:57:15,833 No, really, we've all been through a lot. 1092 00:57:15,933 --> 00:57:17,367 Come on, take it. Thank you, baby. 1093 00:57:17,468 --> 00:57:20,204 Come on, everyone. Post COVID Special! 1094 00:57:20,304 --> 00:57:22,773 Here you go, folks, you all deserve this! 1095 00:57:23,574 --> 00:57:26,443 You did the best you could during the pandemic, honey. 1096 00:57:26,544 --> 00:57:28,378 -I love you! -Huh? 1097 00:57:28,479 --> 00:57:30,615 I shouldn't have yelled at you for not wearing a mask. 1098 00:57:30,715 --> 00:57:32,282 I just didn't understand. 1099 00:57:32,382 --> 00:57:35,352 Well, maybe I should have worn a mask more often but... 1100 00:57:35,452 --> 00:57:38,022 No, no, no, I was being all high and mighty about it... 1101 00:57:38,122 --> 00:57:41,626 Butters, you're not grounded anymore. Come on out, son. 1102 00:57:41,726 --> 00:57:42,927 You mean it, Dad?! 1103 00:57:43,027 --> 00:57:44,394 The pandemic's been awful. 1104 00:57:44,495 --> 00:57:46,263 We all need to just cut each other some slack. 1105 00:57:46,363 --> 00:57:47,798 I love you, Butters! 1106 00:57:47,898 --> 00:57:49,433 -...be sorry. -I totally forgive you! 1107 00:57:49,534 --> 00:57:51,168 Oh, cut yourself some slack. 1108 00:57:51,268 --> 00:57:53,070 We gotta get some more of this stuff. 1109 00:57:54,805 --> 00:57:57,441 Okay, come on, next! 1110 00:58:03,080 --> 00:58:04,448 And then we were like, "Yeah, okay, yeah, 1111 00:58:04,549 --> 00:58:05,816 let's storm the Capitol!" 1112 00:58:05,916 --> 00:58:07,518 And it was a bad idea and we were just, 1113 00:58:07,618 --> 00:58:09,386 you know, we were just going a little bonkers there. 1114 00:58:09,486 --> 00:58:11,021 We shouldn't have stormed the Capitol. 1115 00:58:11,121 --> 00:58:13,190 ALL: That's okay! 1116 00:58:14,024 --> 00:58:15,960 I'm sorry. I thought about it 1117 00:58:16,060 --> 00:58:18,863 and I can't do Space Jam 2. 1118 00:58:18,963 --> 00:58:21,131 I just can't support Chinese censorship. 1119 00:58:21,231 --> 00:58:24,935 Oh, yeah? Well, if you're not gonna make Space Jam 2, 1120 00:58:25,035 --> 00:58:27,772 then I'm not gonna make Space Jam 2! 1121 00:58:27,872 --> 00:58:30,007 And nobody's gonna make Space Jam 2! 1122 00:58:30,107 --> 00:58:32,677 -Yeah! -Yeah! 1123 00:58:32,777 --> 00:58:33,978 -Yeah! 1124 00:58:48,225 --> 00:58:50,527 Hey, everybody! I'm home, guy! 1125 00:58:50,628 --> 00:58:52,630 -Hey! Ike! -Ike, hi! 1126 00:58:52,730 --> 00:58:54,264 Ike, you made it back! 1127 00:58:54,364 --> 00:58:56,934 Well, of course! I wouldn't miss Canadian Boxing Day, buddy! 1128 00:58:57,034 --> 00:58:59,036 Look, everyone, Stan's back! 1129 00:58:59,136 --> 00:59:01,271 -Hey, Stan! 1130 00:59:01,371 --> 00:59:02,773 Hey, guys! 1131 00:59:02,873 --> 00:59:05,610 Good to see you, buddy! How was everything on Mars? 1132 00:59:05,710 --> 00:59:09,079 Really cool, but I'm so glad to be home! How are the kids? 1133 00:59:09,179 --> 00:59:11,015 BOTH: Uncle Stan! 1134 00:59:11,115 --> 00:59:13,818 There's the little ragamuffins! 1135 00:59:13,918 --> 00:59:15,319 Mom. 1136 00:59:15,419 --> 00:59:17,387 Hi, Stanly. 1137 00:59:17,487 --> 00:59:19,256 It's Mom! And Shelley! 1138 00:59:19,356 --> 00:59:21,726 Why are you acting all weird, Turd? 1139 00:59:21,826 --> 00:59:23,293 I don't know. 1140 00:59:23,393 --> 00:59:26,130 For some reason I'm just extra happy to see you guys. 1141 00:59:26,230 --> 00:59:28,599 Hey, look who's here. It's Kenny! 1142 00:59:28,699 --> 00:59:30,868 -Kenny! 1143 00:59:30,968 --> 00:59:32,569 Kenny, what have you been up to, buddy? 1144 00:59:32,670 --> 00:59:35,205 Didn't you hear?! Kenny just won the Nobel Prize 1145 00:59:35,305 --> 00:59:37,842 for combining dark matter and breast implants! 1146 00:59:37,942 --> 00:59:39,877 Oh, you old dog! 1147 00:59:39,977 --> 00:59:41,278 Hey, everybody, he's on! 1148 00:59:41,378 --> 00:59:43,447 What a fantastic audience. Wow. 1149 00:59:43,547 --> 00:59:46,383 What is up with these bisexual Canadians, huh? 1150 00:59:46,483 --> 00:59:48,653 I guess they don't know whether to fuck their brother 1151 00:59:48,753 --> 00:59:49,854 or their sister. 1152 00:59:52,089 --> 00:59:53,523 Hey, Stan. 1153 00:59:53,624 --> 00:59:55,793 Wendy, you're back from Harvard. 1154 00:59:55,893 --> 00:59:57,494 Yeah, just here for the holidays. 1155 00:59:57,594 --> 01:00:00,698 You wanna maybe... spend New Years together again? 1156 01:00:00,798 --> 01:00:02,266 I'd love that. 1157 01:00:02,366 --> 01:00:05,102 Hey, fellas! Can I offer you some pupus?! 1158 01:00:05,202 --> 01:00:07,537 Thanks for choosin' Denny's Applebee's for your party. 1159 01:00:07,638 --> 01:00:09,940 Butters, you're still working here, huh? 1160 01:00:10,040 --> 01:00:11,676 Yup! I just made manager. 1161 01:00:11,776 --> 01:00:16,146 I love doing actual shit that pays actual money. 1162 01:00:16,246 --> 01:00:18,916 Hey, Stan, can you come here for a second? 1163 01:00:19,016 --> 01:00:20,550 What's the matter, dude? 1164 01:00:20,651 --> 01:00:22,486 Dude, he's here. 1165 01:00:22,586 --> 01:00:24,689 Cartman? 1166 01:00:27,024 --> 01:00:30,060 Man, poor Cartman. 1167 01:00:32,296 --> 01:00:37,768 Fuck you guys! You can suck my fucking dick! 1168 01:00:37,868 --> 01:00:39,569 Fuck you! 1169 01:00:39,670 --> 01:00:43,173 It's so sad he never did anything with his life. 1170 01:00:44,008 --> 01:00:47,511 Fuck you, Kyle! Fuck you, Stan! 1171 01:00:47,611 --> 01:00:49,013 Hey, come on, fellas. 1172 01:00:49,113 --> 01:00:51,248 We can't spend another holiday feeling bad for Eric. 1173 01:00:51,348 --> 01:00:54,651 There's nothing that could have changed the path he was on. 1174 01:00:54,752 --> 01:00:56,754 Fuck you, Butters! 1175 01:00:56,854 --> 01:00:59,189 Fuck you, Eric! 1176 01:00:59,289 --> 01:01:02,426 Well, everyone, I just wanna make a toast. 1177 01:01:02,526 --> 01:01:03,794 I don't know... 1178 01:01:03,894 --> 01:01:05,662 what got us through the pandemic 1179 01:01:05,763 --> 01:01:10,467 and made all our futures so very bright, but whatever it was... 1180 01:01:10,567 --> 01:01:13,237 may we have it for the rest of our days. 1181 01:01:13,337 --> 01:01:15,840 God bless us, everyone. 1182 01:01:15,940 --> 01:01:18,375 ALL: Cheers! 1183 01:01:18,475 --> 01:01:20,410 ANNOUNCER: Remember, folks, 1184 01:01:20,510 --> 01:01:23,147 weed can't solve all your problems. 1185 01:01:23,247 --> 01:01:25,682 But Tegridy can. 1186 01:01:25,783 --> 01:01:29,019 Tegridy Weed. 86227