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Would you like to inspect the original subtitles? These are the user uploaded subtitles that are being translated: 1 00:00:34,827 --> 00:00:37,954 [YELLING] 2 00:00:38,122 --> 00:00:40,498 HUB: Let's roll. 3 00:00:47,172 --> 00:00:48,589 [LAUGH ING] 4 00:00:48,757 --> 00:00:51,801 HUB: I love it! I love it! 5 00:00:55,305 --> 00:00:57,932 [SNORING] 6 00:00:58,100 --> 00:01:00,768 [PLANE ENGINE HUMMING NEARBY] 7 00:01:00,936 --> 00:01:02,937 [GARTH & HUB LAUGH ING AND CHEERING] 8 00:01:08,068 --> 00:01:09,569 [GASPS] 9 00:01:11,113 --> 00:01:13,114 [SIREN WAILING] 10 00:01:14,074 --> 00:01:16,159 -Yes. -Ha-ha-ha. 11 00:01:19,079 --> 00:01:21,497 HUB: I knew that'd get him! -Hey. 12 00:01:21,665 --> 00:01:23,708 [BOTH LAUGHING] 13 00:01:29,381 --> 00:01:32,258 [PHONE RINGING] 14 00:01:39,016 --> 00:01:41,309 WALTER: Hello? MAN [OVER PHONE]: Walter? 15 00:01:41,477 --> 00:01:44,187 WALTER: Yes? -I have some bad news. 16 00:01:44,354 --> 00:01:46,355 It's about your two uncles, son. 17 00:01:47,357 --> 00:01:49,525 Walter? 18 00:01:49,693 --> 00:01:53,696 WOMAN: Walter? Walter. 19 00:01:53,864 --> 00:01:55,156 Good news. 20 00:01:55,324 --> 00:01:57,909 You're spending the summer with your two uncles. 21 00:02:00,329 --> 00:02:03,706 It's just gonna be for a few weeks. A month or two, tops. 22 00:02:04,708 --> 00:02:06,626 Scout's honor, okay? 23 00:02:08,504 --> 00:02:11,672 Cross my heart and hope to die, okay? 24 00:02:12,674 --> 00:02:14,967 Where are you going this time? 25 00:02:15,135 --> 00:02:18,429 The Fort Worth College of Court Reporting. 26 00:02:18,597 --> 00:02:19,931 I met a guy last night. 27 00:02:20,098 --> 00:02:22,099 He's gonna pull some strings. 28 00:02:24,186 --> 00:02:27,563 Walter, you're gonna have to learn to trust people... 29 00:02:27,731 --> 00:02:30,691 ...or you're gonna grow up bitter and disappointed. 30 00:02:32,986 --> 00:02:35,905 You're gonna have fun with your two uncles. You'll see. 31 00:02:36,073 --> 00:02:38,074 Mom, you're an only child. 32 00:02:38,242 --> 00:02:40,743 I know what uncles are. 33 00:02:41,745 --> 00:02:44,747 Well, Mr. Smarty-Pants... 34 00:02:44,915 --> 00:02:47,792 ...it just so happens, they really are your uncles. 35 00:02:47,960 --> 00:02:49,752 Your great-uncles. 36 00:02:49,920 --> 00:02:51,754 My mother's brothers. 37 00:02:51,922 --> 00:02:53,256 They disappeared 40 years ago... 38 00:02:53,423 --> 00:02:55,508 ...and just now showed up back here in Texas. 39 00:02:55,676 --> 00:02:57,635 -Can't I come with you? -No. 40 00:02:59,137 --> 00:03:03,641 Honey, I'm gonna be working my tail off learning court reporting. 41 00:03:03,809 --> 00:03:06,602 I'm doing everything I can to keep this family together. 42 00:03:06,770 --> 00:03:09,272 How about a little help here, okay? 43 00:03:09,439 --> 00:03:10,731 [SCOFFS] 44 00:03:14,653 --> 00:03:16,404 Now, look. 45 00:03:16,572 --> 00:03:21,492 They say these two old men got millions stashed away in cash. 46 00:03:21,660 --> 00:03:23,619 Nobody knows where they got it. 47 00:03:23,787 --> 00:03:27,164 Got no kids, no one to leave all that money to. 48 00:03:27,332 --> 00:03:29,834 You and me, we're as close as any family they got. 49 00:03:32,713 --> 00:03:34,046 You want them to like me... 50 00:03:34,214 --> 00:03:37,174 ...so they'll die and leave us their money? 51 00:03:38,552 --> 00:03:41,637 We could buy a house, maybe settle down. 52 00:03:41,805 --> 00:03:44,348 Wouldn't that be nice? 53 00:03:45,309 --> 00:03:47,226 Oh, look. Here it is. 54 00:03:47,394 --> 00:03:49,896 Here it is, honey. Here it is. 55 00:03:52,900 --> 00:03:56,652 By the way, I hear these two were in some state nuthouse for 40 years. 56 00:03:56,820 --> 00:03:58,821 Got all their money from a big lawsuit or something. 57 00:03:58,989 --> 00:04:02,158 But then there's lots of stories about them. 58 00:04:02,326 --> 00:04:04,368 Who knows what to believe? 59 00:04:05,329 --> 00:04:08,998 Just find out where they stashed all that money, okay? 60 00:04:09,166 --> 00:04:15,212 -Maybe we should've called first. -No. Older people just love surprises. 61 00:04:15,964 --> 00:04:17,798 Here we are. 62 00:04:20,969 --> 00:04:22,011 Okay. 63 00:04:27,684 --> 00:04:29,310 [DOGS BARKING] 64 00:04:29,478 --> 00:04:31,187 Aah! Aah! 65 00:04:31,355 --> 00:04:33,606 Go away, go away. Hey, go away. Shoo. 66 00:04:33,774 --> 00:04:35,232 [SQUEALS] 67 00:04:35,400 --> 00:04:38,527 Show them you're friendly, honey. Let them smell your hand. 68 00:04:38,695 --> 00:04:40,404 [GROWLING] 69 00:04:41,031 --> 00:04:43,950 [GUNFIRE IN DISTANCE] 70 00:04:44,117 --> 00:04:46,035 They must be down there by that lake. 71 00:04:46,203 --> 00:04:48,663 Let's go. Come on. 72 00:04:49,665 --> 00:04:51,040 [GUNSHOT] 73 00:04:51,208 --> 00:04:53,042 GARTH: Let's go. There he is. 74 00:04:54,336 --> 00:04:57,254 HUB: Winged him. GARTH: He's running for it. 75 00:05:02,010 --> 00:05:04,595 GARTH: Damn. Empty. -Get ammo. I'll keep him covered. 76 00:05:04,763 --> 00:05:05,805 MAE: Yoo-hoo. 77 00:05:05,973 --> 00:05:07,306 Ha, ha. 78 00:05:07,474 --> 00:05:09,266 HUB: Huh? 79 00:05:11,353 --> 00:05:12,561 Yoo-hoo. 80 00:05:12,729 --> 00:05:14,981 You send for a hooker? 81 00:05:15,148 --> 00:05:17,858 Uncle Hub, Uncle Garth, it's me, Mae. 82 00:05:18,026 --> 00:05:19,735 [MAE CHUCKLING] 83 00:05:21,488 --> 00:05:22,905 Mae. 84 00:05:24,616 --> 00:05:26,742 Pearl's daughter. 85 00:05:26,910 --> 00:05:30,454 And I brought Walter, your nephew. 86 00:05:32,165 --> 00:05:34,917 -Relatives. -Damn, God. 87 00:05:37,587 --> 00:05:39,213 We're old, damn it. Leave us alone. 88 00:05:39,381 --> 00:05:41,424 The last thing we need is some little sissy boy... 89 00:05:41,591 --> 00:05:43,676 ...hanging around all summer. 90 00:05:44,428 --> 00:05:45,594 Walter, honey... 91 00:05:45,762 --> 00:05:48,848 ...why don't you wait out here and play, okay? I'll be a minute. 92 00:05:57,899 --> 00:06:00,484 He could help out around here, do chores. 93 00:06:00,652 --> 00:06:03,112 HUB: Help out? Your kid's a damn wienie. 94 00:06:03,280 --> 00:06:04,321 MAE: I know. 95 00:06:04,489 --> 00:06:06,782 That's why he needs to be around real men... 96 00:06:06,950 --> 00:06:10,453 ...like you two. It won't be for long. 97 00:06:10,620 --> 00:06:13,622 HUB: He's gotta cook for his damn self. I'm not cooking. 98 00:06:14,583 --> 00:06:17,126 [PIG GRUNTING] 99 00:06:20,589 --> 00:06:24,592 Nice doggie. Come play. 100 00:06:26,178 --> 00:06:28,679 MAE: This is for your own good, Walter. 101 00:06:28,847 --> 00:06:30,056 You know... 102 00:06:30,223 --> 00:06:32,808 ... I bet all that money is hidden real close by. 103 00:06:32,976 --> 00:06:34,727 Imagine, a real buried treasure... 104 00:06:34,895 --> 00:06:37,021 ...just like in those books you're always reading. 105 00:06:39,274 --> 00:06:42,985 Walter, maybe if you'd learn to smile once in a while... 106 00:06:43,153 --> 00:06:45,362 ...then people might like you. 107 00:06:47,115 --> 00:06:50,493 Now, come on, how about a big smile to remember you by? 108 00:06:50,660 --> 00:06:53,454 Okay? Come on. 109 00:06:58,835 --> 00:07:01,921 You're gonna have to work on that smile while I'm gone, okay? 110 00:07:04,966 --> 00:07:07,968 Bye, honey. Bye. 111 00:07:15,811 --> 00:07:17,645 [DOGS BARKING] 112 00:07:30,200 --> 00:07:31,450 Well? 113 00:08:02,941 --> 00:08:05,067 If my mom calls, can we hear the telephone out here? 114 00:08:06,111 --> 00:08:09,446 -Don't have one. -No telephone? 115 00:08:13,994 --> 00:08:16,287 Is it okay if I go inside and watch television? 116 00:08:17,289 --> 00:08:20,541 -Ain't got one. -No television? 117 00:08:21,710 --> 00:08:23,752 What do you do? 118 00:08:25,589 --> 00:08:28,674 [ROCK MUSIC PLAYING ON CAR RADIO] 119 00:08:36,099 --> 00:08:37,141 [MUSIC STOPS] 120 00:08:38,101 --> 00:08:39,977 Hey. 121 00:08:41,688 --> 00:08:44,857 Rumor has is you two have millions stashed away. 122 00:08:45,025 --> 00:08:47,193 Why not put some of that money to work for you... 123 00:08:47,360 --> 00:08:50,863 ...with the high yield only investing in gold and silver can bring? 124 00:08:53,366 --> 00:08:55,367 [SHOUTING] 125 00:08:56,870 --> 00:08:58,245 Can I leave you some pamphlets? 126 00:08:58,413 --> 00:08:59,705 [GUNSHOT] 127 00:09:22,479 --> 00:09:24,647 Gentlemen, word is out. 128 00:09:24,814 --> 00:09:26,982 You are two sophisticated men of means-- 129 00:09:28,068 --> 00:09:29,193 [SCREAMS] 130 00:09:29,611 --> 00:09:30,986 Hey! 131 00:10:02,143 --> 00:10:05,729 GARTH: Nice evening. Peaceful. 132 00:10:07,857 --> 00:10:10,693 [FLOORS CREAKING] 133 00:10:12,487 --> 00:10:14,321 GARTH: Hey, kid. 134 00:10:15,031 --> 00:10:18,867 You sleep up there. In the tower. 135 00:10:22,163 --> 00:10:23,914 [BIRD CAWING] 136 00:10:25,125 --> 00:10:29,545 Hey, we don't know nothing about kids. 137 00:10:29,713 --> 00:10:32,548 -So if you need something.... -Find it yourself. 138 00:10:32,716 --> 00:10:35,050 -Or better yet, learn to do without. -Yeah. 139 00:10:35,593 --> 00:10:39,054 -We're both getting old. -Fixing to die any time. 140 00:10:39,222 --> 00:10:43,058 So, uh, if we kick off in the middle of the night... 141 00:10:43,643 --> 00:10:45,519 ...you're on your own. 142 00:10:54,070 --> 00:10:56,905 -Jumpy little fella. -Mm. 143 00:10:57,073 --> 00:10:58,574 Quiet though. 144 00:13:25,555 --> 00:13:27,473 [THUD] 145 00:14:01,508 --> 00:14:03,050 Uncle Hub? 146 00:14:04,594 --> 00:14:05,594 Uncle Hub? 147 00:14:05,762 --> 00:14:07,596 [GASPS] 148 00:14:19,776 --> 00:14:21,944 [DOG BARKS THEN GROWLS] 149 00:14:22,111 --> 00:14:24,238 [WHISPERS] He's sleepwalking. 150 00:14:25,532 --> 00:14:27,407 [DOGS WHIMPERING] 151 00:14:29,160 --> 00:14:30,744 [SWORD UNSHEATHES] 152 00:14:31,746 --> 00:14:33,205 [SWORD CLANGING] 153 00:14:33,373 --> 00:14:35,374 [GRUNTING] 154 00:15:13,496 --> 00:15:15,497 [PIG GRUNTING] 155 00:15:16,332 --> 00:15:18,834 [DOGS BARKING] 156 00:15:30,221 --> 00:15:33,932 Brand-new mattress, and I'm still waking up tired and sore. 157 00:15:45,361 --> 00:15:47,070 [ROOSTER CLUCKING] 158 00:15:47,238 --> 00:15:49,573 [PIG GRUNTING] 159 00:15:57,040 --> 00:15:58,665 So... 160 00:15:59,584 --> 00:16:01,752 ...you two disappeared for... 161 00:16:01,919 --> 00:16:04,546 ...40 whole years. 162 00:16:05,506 --> 00:16:06,673 Where were you? 163 00:16:09,594 --> 00:16:13,722 Africa mostly. Morocco, Algeria, Kenya. 164 00:16:13,890 --> 00:16:15,641 Not much sadder than a couple of has-beens... 165 00:16:15,808 --> 00:16:18,018 ...jabbering about the good old days. 166 00:16:18,186 --> 00:16:20,771 Those days are through. So are we. 167 00:16:30,031 --> 00:16:31,698 [HUB & GARTH GRUNTING] 168 00:16:36,245 --> 00:16:41,291 -I hate this. I hate it. -We're retired. 169 00:16:41,459 --> 00:16:44,127 Gardening is what retired people do. 170 00:16:44,295 --> 00:16:47,422 HUB: What do we want any damn vegetables for anyway? 171 00:16:47,590 --> 00:16:50,425 They're good for you. Make you live to be 100. 172 00:16:50,593 --> 00:16:51,760 HUB: Oh, yeah? -Yeah. 173 00:16:52,553 --> 00:16:54,096 To hell with that. 174 00:16:55,390 --> 00:16:57,140 You live to be 100. 175 00:16:57,308 --> 00:16:58,850 [CAR HORN HONKING] 176 00:17:01,938 --> 00:17:05,524 MAN: Hey, Uncle Hub. WOMAN: Hub, how are you doing? 177 00:17:05,692 --> 00:17:07,025 Kids, say hi to Uncle Hub. 178 00:17:07,193 --> 00:17:09,236 Hub, come back here and see who we brought. 179 00:17:09,404 --> 00:17:11,613 MAN: Uncle Garth. Kids, say hi to Uncle Garth. 180 00:17:11,781 --> 00:17:13,407 [DOGS WHIMPERING] 181 00:17:14,450 --> 00:17:15,826 We're here for a nice long visit. 182 00:17:15,993 --> 00:17:20,455 The whole weekend. We know how lonely our favorite uncles get. 183 00:17:26,462 --> 00:17:27,838 Who the hell are you? 184 00:17:29,424 --> 00:17:31,842 -Walter. -Walter? 185 00:17:32,343 --> 00:17:34,136 Mae's boy? 186 00:17:35,388 --> 00:17:36,513 Pearl's daughter. 187 00:17:36,681 --> 00:17:38,765 That loose, widow woman always running around. 188 00:17:38,933 --> 00:17:41,768 -It figures she'd muscle in. -Is Mae here? 189 00:17:43,187 --> 00:17:44,730 How long are you here for? 190 00:17:46,691 --> 00:17:48,817 Well, we'll just see about that. 191 00:17:49,819 --> 00:17:51,319 We know what you're up to. 192 00:17:52,447 --> 00:17:54,364 Don't think you're gonna get away with it. 193 00:17:55,074 --> 00:17:57,367 Come on, boys. Come on. 194 00:17:58,077 --> 00:18:00,036 His momma's gonna be back before long. 195 00:18:00,204 --> 00:18:01,580 Oh, that woman? Huh. 196 00:18:01,748 --> 00:18:04,166 From what I hear, she may never come back. What then? 197 00:18:04,333 --> 00:18:05,500 Then you'd be stuck with him. 198 00:18:08,171 --> 00:18:10,672 I'm telling you, take him to the orphanage right this minute. 199 00:18:10,840 --> 00:18:14,009 Whether we take him to the orphanage or throw him in the lake... 200 00:18:14,177 --> 00:18:16,511 ...it's our business, not yours. 201 00:18:16,679 --> 00:18:18,764 Here he is now, spying. 202 00:18:20,266 --> 00:18:21,683 Ow! Ow, ow! 203 00:18:21,851 --> 00:18:24,352 See what I'm saying? Did you see what he just did? 204 00:18:24,520 --> 00:18:25,562 GARTH: Mm-hm. 205 00:18:34,864 --> 00:18:37,157 [PHONE RINGS] 206 00:18:38,493 --> 00:18:40,744 WOMAN [OVER PHONE]: Fort Worth College of Court Reporting. 207 00:18:40,912 --> 00:18:43,705 WALTER: I need to find my mom. She's a student there. 208 00:18:43,873 --> 00:18:45,665 WOMAN: I'm sorry, we're closed. 209 00:18:45,833 --> 00:18:48,043 But-- Pl-- It's an emergency. Please? 210 00:18:48,211 --> 00:18:50,170 Her name's Mae, Mae Coleman. 211 00:18:50,338 --> 00:18:52,214 [SIGHS] 212 00:18:52,381 --> 00:18:54,382 Um.... 213 00:18:55,134 --> 00:18:59,429 No, I'm sorry, there's no Mae Coleman registered here. 214 00:19:01,557 --> 00:19:03,517 WALTER: Oh. Try Mae Carter. 215 00:19:05,228 --> 00:19:06,228 [SIGHS] 216 00:19:06,395 --> 00:19:07,938 No, I'm sorry. 217 00:19:08,105 --> 00:19:09,856 WALTER: Mabel Cartwright? 218 00:19:10,024 --> 00:19:11,608 Mabe Calloway? 219 00:19:11,776 --> 00:19:13,902 Donna Tompko? 220 00:19:14,070 --> 00:19:17,614 WOMAN: Young man, are you in some sort of trouble? 221 00:19:17,782 --> 00:19:21,701 She's gotta be there. She just started. 222 00:19:21,869 --> 00:19:25,288 Listen, our classes started back in January. 223 00:19:25,456 --> 00:19:27,916 No one could have possibly just started. 224 00:19:31,295 --> 00:19:34,339 Hello? Hello? 225 00:19:35,508 --> 00:19:37,384 Hello? 226 00:19:44,016 --> 00:19:46,518 Hub, I don't know why you have to drive. It's my car. 227 00:19:46,686 --> 00:19:48,228 Stop whining. 228 00:19:49,647 --> 00:19:52,941 If we find the kid, he's gonna get a piece of my mind. 229 00:19:53,109 --> 00:19:54,860 There he is. 230 00:20:04,954 --> 00:20:06,913 Lawyer, stay in the car. 231 00:20:07,081 --> 00:20:09,291 GARTH: Hub, come on. 232 00:20:09,458 --> 00:20:11,668 -No, no. You, not me, no. GARTH: Hub. 233 00:20:11,836 --> 00:20:13,920 Get out of the car. 234 00:20:36,152 --> 00:20:38,320 Planning your next move? 235 00:20:40,406 --> 00:20:42,574 Where you figure on going? 236 00:20:44,994 --> 00:20:47,913 Here. Area code 406. 237 00:20:48,372 --> 00:20:50,373 Montana. 238 00:20:53,294 --> 00:20:57,756 How come you're not heading to, uh, Fort Worth where your momma is? 239 00:20:59,425 --> 00:21:01,176 She's not there. 240 00:21:01,928 --> 00:21:03,553 She lied. 241 00:21:04,263 --> 00:21:05,305 Again. 242 00:21:08,184 --> 00:21:09,893 GARTH: Listen, kid, uh... 243 00:21:10,061 --> 00:21:13,980 ...we know you got your heart set on going to Montana, but, uh... 244 00:21:14,982 --> 00:21:16,733 ...it's late. 245 00:21:18,361 --> 00:21:20,028 Hub, help me out here. 246 00:21:20,196 --> 00:21:23,323 Why? It sounds like his mind's made up. 247 00:21:24,325 --> 00:21:26,117 Good luck in Montana, kid. 248 00:21:29,372 --> 00:21:31,957 We've got better maps than that one at the house, right, Hub? 249 00:21:33,250 --> 00:21:35,543 Yeah, a man needs a good map, that's for sure. 250 00:21:35,711 --> 00:21:36,920 Sure. 251 00:21:39,048 --> 00:21:42,592 I've been to the orphan home before. I don't wanna go back. 252 00:21:42,760 --> 00:21:43,885 HUB: Damn it, kid... 253 00:21:44,053 --> 00:21:46,596 ...it ain't our fault you got a lousy damn mother. 254 00:22:01,195 --> 00:22:03,405 WALTER: Guess I should get going. 255 00:22:03,572 --> 00:22:05,156 Which way is north? 256 00:22:08,619 --> 00:22:10,537 [CAR HORN HONKS] 257 00:22:12,164 --> 00:22:15,583 I'll say one thing for this kid, he sure pisses off the relatives. 258 00:22:15,751 --> 00:22:17,419 [CHUCKLES] 259 00:22:17,586 --> 00:22:20,505 Uh, listen, kid, uh, do us a favor. 260 00:22:20,673 --> 00:22:24,926 If you come back to the house and stay a while... 261 00:22:25,094 --> 00:22:27,929 ...why, our relatives are gonna hate it. 262 00:22:28,097 --> 00:22:30,432 I bet they hate it so much... 263 00:22:30,599 --> 00:22:34,102 ...they go away and leave us all the hell alone. 264 00:22:35,479 --> 00:22:39,482 -It's crazy enough it just might work. -Mm. Sure. 265 00:22:39,650 --> 00:22:43,361 Come on, kid, help us out here. 266 00:22:47,074 --> 00:22:48,825 I guess I could come back... 267 00:22:49,869 --> 00:22:51,453 ...for a while... 268 00:22:51,620 --> 00:22:53,955 ...seeing it's so important. 269 00:23:09,805 --> 00:23:11,639 So, kid... 270 00:23:11,807 --> 00:23:13,808 ...how's that root beer? 271 00:23:25,488 --> 00:23:28,615 Uncle Hub, Uncle Garth... 272 00:23:28,783 --> 00:23:30,658 ...this has been such... 273 00:23:30,826 --> 00:23:32,827 ...a wonderful weekend. 274 00:23:32,995 --> 00:23:34,621 I hate to bring this up... 275 00:23:34,789 --> 00:23:38,083 ...but have you two looked at that will I left for you? 276 00:23:41,420 --> 00:23:43,630 Uh, you both need to be thinking about these things... 277 00:23:43,798 --> 00:23:44,839 ...at your age. 278 00:23:45,007 --> 00:23:46,633 [CAR HORN HONKING] 279 00:23:59,355 --> 00:24:01,689 Don't shoot. Don't shoot. 280 00:24:02,274 --> 00:24:03,441 GARTH: He's been here before. 281 00:24:04,068 --> 00:24:07,779 SALESMAN: Brothers McCann? -This is no ordinary salesman. 282 00:24:07,947 --> 00:24:09,781 Hell, I like me a challenge. 283 00:24:09,949 --> 00:24:12,700 -Can we talk? -Come out where we can see you. 284 00:24:12,868 --> 00:24:14,786 SALESMAN: Put down your guns and I'll come out. 285 00:24:14,954 --> 00:24:15,995 This guy is good. 286 00:24:16,163 --> 00:24:17,539 [SALESMAN SPEAKING INDISTINCTLY] 287 00:24:17,706 --> 00:24:19,707 HUB: I'll cover, you sneak around. 288 00:24:19,875 --> 00:24:21,376 SALESMAN: --that's not complete. 289 00:24:21,544 --> 00:24:23,378 What? What do you? What? What? 290 00:24:23,546 --> 00:24:26,089 -Why not see what he's selling? SALESMAN: Let me show it to you. 291 00:24:26,257 --> 00:24:28,591 -What the hell for? SALESMAN: It's right behind my car. 292 00:24:28,759 --> 00:24:30,969 What's the good having money if you never spend it? 293 00:24:31,137 --> 00:24:33,721 -Trust me. -It could be the kid has a point. 294 00:24:33,889 --> 00:24:35,723 Yeah, well.... 295 00:24:35,891 --> 00:24:37,892 We'll see what the man's selling. 296 00:24:38,060 --> 00:24:41,020 -Then we shoot him. -Good plan. 297 00:24:47,194 --> 00:24:49,070 Whew. Ha, ha. 298 00:24:49,238 --> 00:24:51,239 Due to the, uh... 299 00:24:51,991 --> 00:24:54,742 ...unsettling nature of our previous encounters... 300 00:24:54,910 --> 00:24:57,579 ... I took it upon myself to search the world over for that-- 301 00:24:57,746 --> 00:24:59,747 That perfect item that'd be just right... 302 00:24:59,915 --> 00:25:02,458 ...for two exuberant sportsmen such as yourselves. 303 00:25:02,626 --> 00:25:06,546 And boys, well, I do believe I found it. 304 00:25:08,924 --> 00:25:10,049 Voilà. 305 00:25:15,598 --> 00:25:17,098 What is it? 306 00:25:17,600 --> 00:25:19,767 Well, that right there is the sport of kings. 307 00:25:19,935 --> 00:25:22,145 Till now, only heads of state have been able to afford... 308 00:25:22,313 --> 00:25:23,354 ...equipment like that... 309 00:25:23,522 --> 00:25:25,940 ...and it is so simple to operate this child could do it. 310 00:25:26,108 --> 00:25:27,442 -Really? SALESMAN: Ah, here. 311 00:25:28,152 --> 00:25:29,611 I'll tell you what. 312 00:25:29,778 --> 00:25:32,739 You step right up here and chunk that lever back on my signal, okay? 313 00:25:36,243 --> 00:25:37,619 Go ahead. 314 00:25:42,791 --> 00:25:46,044 -Wow. -Most powerful one on the market... 315 00:25:46,212 --> 00:25:47,879 ...and very reasonably priced, I might add. 316 00:25:48,047 --> 00:25:49,714 Well, that is the biggest waste of money... 317 00:25:49,882 --> 00:25:51,466 ... I have ever seen in my entire life. 318 00:25:51,634 --> 00:25:54,385 Mister, you load up that contraption and get the hell off this land. 319 00:25:54,553 --> 00:25:57,847 -We'll take it. -Oh, no, you don't. 320 00:25:58,015 --> 00:26:00,099 I won't have my children around this gun foolishness. 321 00:26:00,267 --> 00:26:01,517 Then leave. 322 00:26:03,437 --> 00:26:08,233 -Come on, Daddy, let's go. -Come on. Come on. 323 00:26:08,400 --> 00:26:10,526 HELEN: You know what happens when my feelings get hurt. 324 00:26:10,694 --> 00:26:12,362 Get in the car. 325 00:26:32,841 --> 00:26:34,259 Pull. 326 00:26:37,179 --> 00:26:38,221 GARTH: Pull. 327 00:26:41,350 --> 00:26:42,350 HUB: Pull. 328 00:26:42,518 --> 00:26:43,935 [DISK WHIRRING] 329 00:26:54,697 --> 00:26:56,531 [DOOR CREAKS THEN SLAMS] 330 00:27:14,341 --> 00:27:18,594 WALTER: Uncle Hub? -Don't. I tried to wake him once. 331 00:27:18,762 --> 00:27:20,847 He nearly tore my head off. 332 00:27:21,015 --> 00:27:23,349 Leave him for a few minutes. 333 00:27:25,978 --> 00:27:28,396 What are you doing out here so late? 334 00:27:30,899 --> 00:27:32,859 WALTER: What's wrong with him? 335 00:27:33,027 --> 00:27:35,236 Well, a man's body may grow old... 336 00:27:35,404 --> 00:27:40,408 ...but inside his spirit can still be as young and restless as ever. 337 00:27:41,577 --> 00:27:43,411 And him... 338 00:27:43,579 --> 00:27:46,247 ...in his day, he had more spirit... 339 00:27:46,415 --> 00:27:48,249 ...than 20 men. 340 00:27:51,712 --> 00:27:55,882 WALTER: It looks like he's looking for something. 341 00:27:56,050 --> 00:27:58,801 GARTH: Mm-hm. -What? 342 00:28:02,514 --> 00:28:04,599 He's looking for her. 343 00:28:12,775 --> 00:28:15,985 Who? What was her name? 344 00:28:17,488 --> 00:28:18,863 Jasmine. 345 00:28:24,745 --> 00:28:26,496 Okay, tell me. 346 00:28:29,041 --> 00:28:31,751 You want me to tell you the story? 347 00:28:31,960 --> 00:28:33,711 Now? 348 00:28:34,463 --> 00:28:36,297 That'd take days. 349 00:28:41,762 --> 00:28:44,097 Uh, well, uh.... 350 00:28:45,391 --> 00:28:48,726 Hub was always too restless for Texas. 351 00:28:49,561 --> 00:28:51,813 He convinced our folks... 352 00:28:51,980 --> 00:28:53,981 ...that he needed to go to Europe... 353 00:28:54,149 --> 00:28:56,651 ...and I needed to come along. 354 00:28:57,319 --> 00:29:01,906 That was the summer of 1914. 355 00:29:06,954 --> 00:29:09,163 [CROWD CHATTERING] 356 00:29:15,671 --> 00:29:17,672 [SHIP HORN BLOWS] 357 00:29:26,807 --> 00:29:28,391 [CHUCKLES] 358 00:29:30,686 --> 00:29:32,728 [WOMAN SPEAKING IN FRENCH] 359 00:29:32,896 --> 00:29:37,024 BOY: Extra, extra. Germany invades. 360 00:29:37,192 --> 00:29:40,027 GARTH: Unfortunately, just as we arrived in France... 361 00:29:40,195 --> 00:29:45,533 ...so did the Kaiser and the entire German Army. 362 00:29:45,701 --> 00:29:47,368 I wanted to go home... 363 00:29:47,536 --> 00:29:49,162 ...but Hub said we should tour Europe... 364 00:29:49,329 --> 00:29:51,372 ...one step ahead of the Germans. 365 00:29:51,540 --> 00:29:55,543 And we did. What a time that was. 366 00:29:57,045 --> 00:30:02,216 There were these girls in Toulon, twins. And they.... 367 00:30:05,179 --> 00:30:06,471 [COUGHS] 368 00:30:06,638 --> 00:30:11,476 Anyway, we eventually, uh, wound up in Marseilles... 369 00:30:11,643 --> 00:30:14,729 ...with passages booked on the last ship out of Europe. 370 00:30:14,897 --> 00:30:19,400 And Hub, he decided that we should spend our last night... 371 00:30:19,568 --> 00:30:22,487 ...enjoying the local nightlife. 372 00:30:22,654 --> 00:30:25,656 [BAND PLAYING OFFENBACH'S "ORPHEUS IN THE UNDERWORLD"] 373 00:30:25,824 --> 00:30:27,408 [CHATTERING] 374 00:30:31,371 --> 00:30:34,707 GARTH: He made friends with these soldiers... 375 00:30:35,751 --> 00:30:39,921 ...and they bought us some drinks. Strong, strange drinks. 376 00:30:40,088 --> 00:30:41,839 [BOTH SHOUT] 377 00:30:42,925 --> 00:30:45,259 GARTH: We woke up on a ship... 378 00:30:45,427 --> 00:30:48,221 ...bound for North Africa, shanghaied. 379 00:30:48,388 --> 00:30:49,764 [MEN SPEAKING IN FRENCH] 380 00:30:49,932 --> 00:30:51,933 -Shanghaied? GARTH: Yeah. 381 00:30:52,100 --> 00:30:56,270 We found ourselves in the French Foreign Legion. 382 00:30:56,438 --> 00:30:59,941 "It's all my fault," Hub said, but he told me not to worry. 383 00:31:00,108 --> 00:31:02,818 He'd make sure nothing happened to me. 384 00:31:02,986 --> 00:31:04,987 [GUNFIRE AND EXPLOSIONS BOOMING] 385 00:31:06,156 --> 00:31:08,157 [MEN GRUNTING AND SHOUTING] 386 00:31:11,411 --> 00:31:14,497 GARTH: We fought many battles against overwhelming odds. 387 00:31:17,084 --> 00:31:19,710 He saved my life countless times. 388 00:31:26,468 --> 00:31:27,885 [INAUDIBLE DIALOGUE] 389 00:31:35,519 --> 00:31:39,188 GARTH: When the war was over, we both went our separate ways. 390 00:31:39,356 --> 00:31:46,195 I ended up leading safaris, mostly for writers and, uh, Hollywood folk. 391 00:31:46,363 --> 00:31:48,531 But that was too tame for Hub. 392 00:31:48,699 --> 00:31:50,324 [SHOUTING] 393 00:31:52,202 --> 00:31:53,286 GARTH: He got commissions... 394 00:31:53,453 --> 00:31:55,997 ...from the new North African governments... 395 00:31:56,164 --> 00:31:58,416 ...to put an end to the slave trade. 396 00:32:03,338 --> 00:32:06,007 No one, slave trader or Bedouin... 397 00:32:06,174 --> 00:32:10,344 ...had ever seen anything like this mad American... 398 00:32:10,512 --> 00:32:12,680 ...who fought like 20 men. 399 00:32:16,977 --> 00:32:18,185 HUB: Hey. 400 00:32:18,353 --> 00:32:21,480 What the hell are you two doing out here in the middle of the night? 401 00:32:22,983 --> 00:32:24,692 Just enjoying the cool night air. 402 00:32:26,820 --> 00:32:29,238 Either one of you got a lick of sense... 403 00:32:29,406 --> 00:32:31,365 ...go to bed. 404 00:33:04,274 --> 00:33:06,233 [INAUDIBLE DIALOGUE] 405 00:34:28,984 --> 00:34:30,776 MAE: Dear Walter... 406 00:34:30,944 --> 00:34:34,321 ...how are you? Found your uncles' money yet? 407 00:34:34,489 --> 00:34:36,657 Here I am at school in Fort Worth... 408 00:34:36,825 --> 00:34:39,076 ...my nose to the court-reporting grind.... 409 00:34:43,832 --> 00:34:47,418 HUB: Damn it, brother, I'm not going anywhere looking like this. 410 00:34:51,339 --> 00:34:53,382 Look like a damn sharecropper. Ha, ha. 411 00:34:53,550 --> 00:34:57,178 We're gardeners. This is what gardeners wear. 412 00:34:57,345 --> 00:35:00,097 I bought you some clothes too. They're in your room. 413 00:35:05,187 --> 00:35:08,022 GARTH: Think how good all these vegetables are gonna taste. 414 00:35:08,190 --> 00:35:10,983 Peas, beans... 415 00:35:11,151 --> 00:35:14,570 ...squash, tomatoes. 416 00:35:14,738 --> 00:35:16,864 -Yeah. -What's this row? 417 00:35:18,533 --> 00:35:19,575 Beets. 418 00:35:19,743 --> 00:35:21,202 HUB: Beets? -Yeah. 419 00:35:25,415 --> 00:35:26,457 And what about this row? 420 00:35:26,625 --> 00:35:29,043 GARTH: Potatoes. HUB: Potatoes? 421 00:35:29,211 --> 00:35:30,211 GARTH: Yeah. 422 00:35:32,881 --> 00:35:34,840 Wait one damn minute here. 423 00:35:35,509 --> 00:35:37,968 -What's this row here? -Tomatoes. 424 00:35:38,136 --> 00:35:40,930 HUB: Tomatoes? -Yeah. 425 00:35:41,097 --> 00:35:47,686 That's lettuce, squash, sweet potatoes, carrots, bok choy. 426 00:35:47,854 --> 00:35:50,564 -Bok Choy? What is that? -Chinese cabbage. 427 00:35:51,900 --> 00:35:55,236 -Hey, that row looks right. -Yeah, well, this is corn. 428 00:35:56,071 --> 00:35:58,739 All those seeds did look alike, come to think of it. 429 00:35:58,907 --> 00:36:01,242 -Yeah, like corn. GARTH: Boy... 430 00:36:01,409 --> 00:36:03,369 ...that seed salesman sure saw us coming. 431 00:36:03,537 --> 00:36:04,912 No, saw you coming. 432 00:36:05,747 --> 00:36:08,207 Corn, corn, corn. 433 00:36:08,375 --> 00:36:10,251 Nothing but corn. 434 00:36:11,670 --> 00:36:14,129 Corn. Corn. 435 00:36:14,297 --> 00:36:15,923 [HORN HONKS IN DISTANCE] 436 00:36:16,091 --> 00:36:17,758 By God, it's here. 437 00:36:17,926 --> 00:36:20,553 Kid, help him unload. We'll be right back. 438 00:36:58,091 --> 00:37:00,467 [BLEATING] 439 00:37:00,635 --> 00:37:02,386 [GROWLING NEARBY] 440 00:37:06,975 --> 00:37:08,475 [LION ROARS] 441 00:37:08,643 --> 00:37:11,478 Careful, kid. He's a man-eater. 442 00:37:13,106 --> 00:37:17,568 Is this the McCann place? We brought your lion. 443 00:37:18,904 --> 00:37:23,782 King of the beasts. Terror of the jungle. 444 00:37:37,631 --> 00:37:40,883 You bought a lion? A used lion? 445 00:37:41,051 --> 00:37:43,844 GARTH: Stand back, kid, you don't wanna get mauled and eaten. 446 00:37:44,846 --> 00:37:46,347 -What are you doing? GARTH: Brother... 447 00:37:46,514 --> 00:37:49,058 ...this is the best idea you ever had. 448 00:37:49,225 --> 00:37:52,436 This lion head will sure look good hanging over our fireplace. 449 00:37:52,604 --> 00:37:55,147 What fireplace? You don't have a fireplace. 450 00:37:56,066 --> 00:37:57,107 We'll buy one. 451 00:37:58,526 --> 00:38:01,779 -You're gonna shoot it? -Well, be seeing you. 452 00:38:04,616 --> 00:38:08,035 GARTH: He's in there, all right. -I don't think this is very sporting. 453 00:38:08,203 --> 00:38:12,206 Kid, at our age, this is as sporting as we get. 454 00:38:12,374 --> 00:38:14,375 GARTH: Walter, come here. 455 00:38:14,542 --> 00:38:17,586 When I give the word, pull this. 456 00:38:24,344 --> 00:38:25,719 Pull. 457 00:38:34,396 --> 00:38:35,437 Hey. 458 00:38:35,605 --> 00:38:36,730 [LION GRUNTS] 459 00:38:36,898 --> 00:38:37,940 Come on out of there. 460 00:38:38,108 --> 00:38:41,527 Hey, you in the crate. 461 00:38:41,695 --> 00:38:44,989 Get your lion butt out of there. 462 00:38:45,156 --> 00:38:46,573 Looks awful tame. 463 00:38:46,741 --> 00:38:48,617 [BELCHES THEN COUGHS] 464 00:38:49,744 --> 00:38:51,912 This lion's no good. 465 00:38:52,080 --> 00:38:56,750 It's-- It's defective. 466 00:38:56,918 --> 00:39:00,421 -It's alive, that's the main thing. -Go ahead and shoot it then. 467 00:39:00,588 --> 00:39:03,507 No, it wouldn't be sporting, shooting it inside a crate. 468 00:39:04,009 --> 00:39:05,926 WALTER: Looks kind of old... 469 00:39:06,094 --> 00:39:07,511 ...worn-out looking. 470 00:39:07,679 --> 00:39:10,431 Some kind of lion hunt this is. 471 00:39:10,598 --> 00:39:13,142 Perfect. A reject. 472 00:39:13,309 --> 00:39:16,061 Some sick zoo cast-off. 473 00:39:17,230 --> 00:39:20,691 So can I keep him? 474 00:39:21,609 --> 00:39:24,611 I'll look after him and take care of him and feed him and everything. 475 00:39:24,779 --> 00:39:26,905 I never had a pet of my very own before. 476 00:39:27,073 --> 00:39:30,868 So, kid, you wanna take care of it, nurse it back to health? 477 00:39:31,036 --> 00:39:33,787 Good. Then we shoot it. 478 00:39:40,587 --> 00:39:42,796 GARTH: That's some lion you bought. 479 00:39:42,964 --> 00:39:45,424 HUB: That's some garden seeds you bought. 480 00:39:48,386 --> 00:39:52,306 Don't worry, they're not as bad as they seem right at first. 481 00:39:52,474 --> 00:39:55,434 I'll be right back with supper. 482 00:40:05,820 --> 00:40:09,323 There. Now you can see out. 483 00:40:14,120 --> 00:40:16,121 You sure he can't get out? 484 00:40:17,665 --> 00:40:19,792 She. It's a girl lion. 485 00:40:21,586 --> 00:40:23,003 I named her Jasmine. 486 00:40:25,131 --> 00:40:26,423 What'd you just say? 487 00:40:33,056 --> 00:40:36,141 It seemed like a good name for a lion. 488 00:40:38,478 --> 00:40:40,479 [DOOR SLAMS] 489 00:40:50,240 --> 00:40:55,035 I'm sorry it took a while to come in. In 40 years, I never had a call for it. 490 00:40:57,956 --> 00:41:00,541 Purina Lion Chow. 491 00:41:00,708 --> 00:41:02,709 I'll be. 492 00:41:02,877 --> 00:41:05,129 If you wait a few minutes, my boys will load you up. 493 00:41:06,339 --> 00:41:08,340 I got it. 494 00:41:10,009 --> 00:41:12,469 Garth, pay the man. 495 00:41:12,637 --> 00:41:14,471 Hub, be careful. 496 00:41:15,557 --> 00:41:18,142 Mr. McCann, those are bags that weigh 50 pounds apiece. 497 00:41:21,479 --> 00:41:23,397 GARTH: Take the other end. 498 00:41:23,565 --> 00:41:25,732 Here we go. 499 00:41:37,412 --> 00:41:39,830 If you two old ladies wanna get in, I'll take you home now. 500 00:41:41,749 --> 00:41:44,251 [GROANS] 501 00:41:44,419 --> 00:41:46,086 Hub. 502 00:42:05,273 --> 00:42:06,607 Psst. 503 00:42:07,650 --> 00:42:08,859 Psst. 504 00:42:09,027 --> 00:42:11,361 [WHISPERS] Little boy. 505 00:42:11,529 --> 00:42:13,780 You're with those McCann brothers? 506 00:42:18,077 --> 00:42:22,456 I know that they're ex-Mafia hit men. 507 00:42:22,624 --> 00:42:29,421 They're on the run with millions that they stole from Al Capone. 508 00:42:31,049 --> 00:42:33,258 [MOUTHS] Be careful. 509 00:42:47,607 --> 00:42:49,149 Tell me more about Africa. 510 00:42:49,317 --> 00:42:52,527 About you and Uncle Hub and Jasmine. 511 00:42:52,695 --> 00:42:55,822 Why would a smart kid like you wanna hear hokey old stories? 512 00:42:57,867 --> 00:42:59,952 What else do we have to do? 513 00:43:01,663 --> 00:43:03,163 Where was I? 514 00:43:05,083 --> 00:43:09,253 "No one, slave trader or Bedouin... 515 00:43:09,420 --> 00:43:11,713 ...had ever seen anything like this mad American... 516 00:43:11,881 --> 00:43:13,548 ...who fought like 20 men." 517 00:43:13,716 --> 00:43:16,385 Yeah, right, right, right. Well, it so happened... 518 00:43:17,553 --> 00:43:19,846 ...one of the women that Hub freed... 519 00:43:20,014 --> 00:43:22,641 ...was handmaiden to a princess. 520 00:43:26,312 --> 00:43:30,190 When she told her mistress the story of her rescue... 521 00:43:30,358 --> 00:43:35,570 ...most of all, she told her about the handsome, heroic American. 522 00:43:37,073 --> 00:43:40,951 "I must meet this man," the princess said. 523 00:43:42,245 --> 00:43:44,037 [WOMEN GIGGLING] 524 00:43:44,205 --> 00:43:49,042 GARTH: One day, Hub was riding his horse along the Mediterranean... 525 00:43:49,210 --> 00:43:53,672 ...when out of nowhere, another rider came up alongside. 526 00:43:56,134 --> 00:43:59,720 But you know Hub. He wasn't about to let a chance pass. 527 00:43:59,887 --> 00:44:01,555 It became a race. 528 00:44:05,685 --> 00:44:10,272 Most people say that Hub was the best rider in North Africa. 529 00:44:12,108 --> 00:44:14,776 But this other rider kept neck and neck... 530 00:44:14,944 --> 00:44:18,322 ...as the race went on and on. 531 00:44:24,620 --> 00:44:27,664 Then the two horses collided. 532 00:44:27,832 --> 00:44:30,667 The riders went flying into the sea. 533 00:44:30,835 --> 00:44:34,087 Hub leaped to his feet ready for anything... 534 00:44:34,255 --> 00:44:36,214 ...or so he thought. 535 00:44:47,101 --> 00:44:49,603 This was the princess... 536 00:44:49,771 --> 00:44:53,607 ...the most beautiful woman he had ever seen. 537 00:44:56,235 --> 00:45:00,072 WALTER: Jasmine. GARTH: Jasmine. 538 00:45:07,288 --> 00:45:09,956 Many people say there's no such thing nowadays... 539 00:45:10,124 --> 00:45:12,459 ...it's something you only find in stories... 540 00:45:12,627 --> 00:45:16,630 ...but when these two set eyes on each other for the first time... 541 00:45:16,798 --> 00:45:20,425 ...this was honest to God, no kidding, sure enough... 542 00:45:20,593 --> 00:45:22,469 ...once in a lifetime... 543 00:45:22,637 --> 00:45:26,223 ...love at first sight. 544 00:45:33,314 --> 00:45:35,816 Wait a minute. If it was true love... 545 00:45:35,983 --> 00:45:38,735 ...they would've been married and lived happily ever after, right? 546 00:45:38,903 --> 00:45:40,987 Aren't you getting ahead of the story? 547 00:45:42,990 --> 00:45:45,575 -Okay, keep going. -Well... 548 00:45:45,743 --> 00:45:48,662 ...things weren't easy for them back then. 549 00:45:48,830 --> 00:45:50,956 She was promised to another man... 550 00:45:51,124 --> 00:45:54,084 ...a powerful sheik in a neighboring kingdom. 551 00:45:57,588 --> 00:46:01,341 He heard that Jasmine was in love with another... 552 00:46:01,509 --> 00:46:03,510 ...so he threatened her father... 553 00:46:03,678 --> 00:46:06,012 ...and took Jasmine off to his kingdom... 554 00:46:06,180 --> 00:46:08,723 ...and locked her up in his harem. 555 00:46:10,560 --> 00:46:14,521 She told the other wives that she would rather die... 556 00:46:14,689 --> 00:46:17,190 ...than marry this heartless sheik. 557 00:46:17,358 --> 00:46:19,151 She had a knife on her. 558 00:46:19,318 --> 00:46:20,527 [WOMEN GASP] 559 00:46:20,695 --> 00:46:22,821 GARTH: And when he came for her that night... 560 00:46:22,989 --> 00:46:25,282 ...she was going to slit her own throat. 561 00:46:26,492 --> 00:46:28,535 What did Uncle Hub do? 562 00:46:29,078 --> 00:46:31,079 [GRUNTING AND SHOUTING] 563 00:46:48,055 --> 00:46:49,347 [BOTH WHIMPERING] 564 00:47:03,070 --> 00:47:07,491 GARTH: They got married, and lived happily ever after. 565 00:47:07,658 --> 00:47:09,159 The end. 566 00:47:11,704 --> 00:47:13,747 But wait... 567 00:47:13,915 --> 00:47:15,457 ...if they lived happily ever after... 568 00:47:15,625 --> 00:47:19,169 ...then they got married, and she'd be here right now with us, right? 569 00:47:19,337 --> 00:47:21,421 Didn't they have kids? Where are they? 570 00:47:21,589 --> 00:47:24,174 Nurse? What's going on? 571 00:47:25,384 --> 00:47:27,594 I wish they'd tell us something. 572 00:47:31,766 --> 00:47:33,683 HUB: Get out of my face! 573 00:47:33,851 --> 00:47:37,270 Where'd you put my damn pants? Where's my pants? 574 00:47:37,438 --> 00:47:41,024 DOCTOR: You can't do that. HUB: Give me my pants. 575 00:47:41,192 --> 00:47:45,278 Who put me in here? Who put me in here? You two. 576 00:47:48,824 --> 00:47:51,117 Hospitals, lot of good they are. 577 00:47:51,285 --> 00:47:55,080 How would you know? You're never in one long enough to find out. 578 00:47:56,541 --> 00:47:58,792 Hey, you missed the turn. 579 00:47:58,960 --> 00:48:01,211 -I did not. -Home is that way. 580 00:48:01,379 --> 00:48:03,255 I wanna go this way. 581 00:48:13,641 --> 00:48:17,310 Doctor, um, where is Mr. McCann? 582 00:48:17,478 --> 00:48:20,564 Oh, I'm afraid he's gone. 583 00:48:22,316 --> 00:48:23,692 [GASPS] 584 00:48:25,111 --> 00:48:29,114 Well, he led a long full life. 585 00:48:29,949 --> 00:48:34,619 -Where is the body? -No, he's gone. Left. 586 00:48:34,787 --> 00:48:36,830 Mr. McCann checked himself out. 587 00:48:37,582 --> 00:48:38,790 Left? 588 00:48:42,378 --> 00:48:43,712 Brother... 589 00:48:43,879 --> 00:48:48,049 ...someday you're gonna have to start acting your age. 590 00:48:48,217 --> 00:48:50,510 What the hell does that mean? 591 00:48:51,012 --> 00:48:53,847 All your life, you've never been frightened of anything. 592 00:48:54,015 --> 00:48:56,182 So what's eating at you now? 593 00:48:56,350 --> 00:48:58,518 Getting old? 594 00:48:58,686 --> 00:49:01,313 -Dying? -Hell, no. 595 00:49:02,773 --> 00:49:05,442 -What, then? -Being useless. 596 00:49:06,360 --> 00:49:07,944 When we were young there was a reason... 597 00:49:08,112 --> 00:49:10,196 ...there was a point. Things made sense. 598 00:49:10,364 --> 00:49:13,533 Now there's no point to anything. So, what do we do? We garden. 599 00:49:13,701 --> 00:49:15,201 We outlived our time, brother. 600 00:49:15,369 --> 00:49:16,828 [MEN CHEERING NEARBY] 601 00:49:16,996 --> 00:49:19,414 [ENGINE REVVING] 602 00:49:29,425 --> 00:49:31,843 FRANKIE: Go get some beers. MAN 1: All right. 603 00:49:33,262 --> 00:49:35,305 Hey, old man... 604 00:49:35,473 --> 00:49:36,890 ...how's that barbeque? 605 00:49:37,058 --> 00:49:38,808 Give me some. 606 00:49:39,935 --> 00:49:42,937 We're busy, boy. Get lost, all right? 607 00:49:43,230 --> 00:49:44,564 [SNORTS] 608 00:49:44,732 --> 00:49:46,399 FRANKIE: What did you say? 609 00:49:46,567 --> 00:49:47,567 [HUB SIGHS] 610 00:49:47,735 --> 00:49:49,986 Here's a perfect example of what I've been talking about. 611 00:49:50,154 --> 00:49:52,405 Since this boy was suckling on his momma's tit... 612 00:49:52,573 --> 00:49:54,699 ...he's been given everything but discipline. 613 00:49:54,867 --> 00:49:56,534 And now his idea of courage and manhood... 614 00:49:56,702 --> 00:49:58,745 ...is to get together with a bunch of punk friends... 615 00:49:58,913 --> 00:50:00,914 ...and ride around irritating folks... 616 00:50:01,082 --> 00:50:04,209 ...too good-natured to put a stop to it. Ha, ha. 617 00:50:06,003 --> 00:50:08,088 Hey, who do you think you are, huh? 618 00:50:09,882 --> 00:50:12,050 -Just a dumb kid, Hub, don't kill him. -Right. 619 00:50:12,218 --> 00:50:13,551 Ha-- Oh! 620 00:50:16,681 --> 00:50:19,015 Hub McCann. Fought in two world wars... 621 00:50:19,183 --> 00:50:21,267 ...and countless smaller ones on three continents. 622 00:50:21,435 --> 00:50:23,478 I led thousands of men into battle with everything... 623 00:50:23,646 --> 00:50:25,939 ...from horses and swords to artillery and tanks. 624 00:50:26,107 --> 00:50:28,108 I've seen the headwaters of the Nile... 625 00:50:28,275 --> 00:50:31,027 ...and tribes of natives that no white man had ever seen before. 626 00:50:31,195 --> 00:50:33,279 I've won and lost a dozen fortunes... 627 00:50:33,447 --> 00:50:35,156 ...killed many men... 628 00:50:35,324 --> 00:50:37,367 ...and loved only one woman... 629 00:50:37,535 --> 00:50:41,496 ...with a passion a flea like you could never begin to understand. 630 00:50:41,664 --> 00:50:42,706 That's who I am. 631 00:50:44,375 --> 00:50:46,751 Now, go home, boy. 632 00:50:48,129 --> 00:50:50,130 FRANKIE: We'll show these old bastards whose tough. 633 00:50:50,297 --> 00:50:51,798 -Get out your knife. MAN 1: Yeah. 634 00:50:52,883 --> 00:50:54,217 [GUN COCKS] 635 00:50:54,760 --> 00:50:56,678 Now, boys... 636 00:50:56,846 --> 00:50:59,055 ...you're fixing to let those teenage hormones... 637 00:50:59,223 --> 00:51:00,640 ...get you into a world of trouble. 638 00:51:00,808 --> 00:51:02,267 [KNIVES CLATTER ON FLOOR] 639 00:51:02,435 --> 00:51:04,269 Damn it, Garth. Did I ask you to butt in? 640 00:51:04,437 --> 00:51:06,146 Hub, you just come out of the hospital. 641 00:51:06,313 --> 00:51:09,649 Well, there's, uh-- There's only four of them. 642 00:51:09,817 --> 00:51:12,110 Yeah, but, look, you fight this one first. 643 00:51:12,278 --> 00:51:15,697 And then I'll let you fight the other three after, okay? 644 00:51:15,865 --> 00:51:17,991 Yeah. Watch this, kid. 645 00:51:18,159 --> 00:51:20,744 Now, you. You better pick that knife up... 646 00:51:20,911 --> 00:51:25,039 ...because, son, heh, you're gonna need all the help you can get. 647 00:51:25,207 --> 00:51:26,833 [CHUCKLES] 648 00:51:27,001 --> 00:51:28,501 -Come on, Frankie. -Get him. 649 00:51:28,669 --> 00:51:30,670 [MEN CHATTERING] 650 00:51:32,381 --> 00:51:34,048 [GRUNTING] 651 00:51:35,050 --> 00:51:37,469 Shoot, oldest trick in the book. 652 00:51:37,636 --> 00:51:39,387 FRANKIE: Oh! Okay, okay. 653 00:51:39,555 --> 00:51:43,850 You hold it wrong, son. Not like this. You always do it like this. Smooth. 654 00:51:44,018 --> 00:51:45,852 -Try it again. MAN 2: Come on, Frankie. 655 00:51:46,020 --> 00:51:47,353 Come on, Frankie, get him. 656 00:51:47,521 --> 00:51:49,397 -Cut him MAN 2: Come on. Okay. 657 00:51:49,565 --> 00:51:52,734 MAN 1: Get him, Frankie, cut him. -You got him. Frankie, come on. 658 00:51:52,902 --> 00:51:54,861 [GRUNTING AND SHOUTING] 659 00:51:57,907 --> 00:52:00,200 -Stop, stop. Aah! -You're breaking his arm. 660 00:52:00,367 --> 00:52:03,203 You three had better get in there and help him. 661 00:52:03,370 --> 00:52:05,371 [GRUNTING AND SHOUTING] 662 00:52:09,293 --> 00:52:11,211 [GLASS SHATTERS] 663 00:52:16,634 --> 00:52:18,718 Why aren't you helping him? 664 00:52:18,886 --> 00:52:22,889 Hub always hogs the bad guys. He's selfish that way. 665 00:52:24,058 --> 00:52:26,184 But there's four of them. 666 00:52:27,186 --> 00:52:28,728 Three of them. 667 00:52:31,232 --> 00:52:35,902 Go on, Hub. Hey, there's my boy. 668 00:52:36,070 --> 00:52:37,904 Like this, kid? Pretty good, huh? 669 00:52:38,072 --> 00:52:40,365 -Couldn't you share? -No. 670 00:52:40,533 --> 00:52:42,575 After 40 years, I'm used to it. 671 00:52:42,743 --> 00:52:43,743 Aah! 672 00:52:43,911 --> 00:52:45,161 [CAR HORN HONKING] 673 00:52:45,329 --> 00:52:49,040 Besides, right now, I figure he needs them worse than I do. 674 00:52:51,085 --> 00:52:53,086 Go on, Hub. 675 00:52:53,254 --> 00:52:54,379 This will hold him though. 676 00:52:54,547 --> 00:52:56,214 -This will hold him. MAN 1: Please. Please. 677 00:52:56,382 --> 00:52:57,590 [BOTH LAUGHING] 678 00:53:12,481 --> 00:53:13,982 They're not back yet, Daddy. 679 00:53:14,149 --> 00:53:16,359 I'm sure with Hub just out of the hospital... 680 00:53:16,527 --> 00:53:18,528 ...they're taking it slow and easy on the way home. 681 00:53:18,696 --> 00:53:19,946 Yeah. 682 00:53:21,115 --> 00:53:23,449 Oh, I hate this house. I hate it. 683 00:53:23,617 --> 00:53:24,993 When those two finally drop dead... 684 00:53:25,160 --> 00:53:27,287 ... I want you to burn this place to the ground, Daddy. 685 00:53:27,454 --> 00:53:30,248 Hey, what's that? 686 00:53:31,000 --> 00:53:32,292 BOY 2: Beats me. 687 00:53:32,459 --> 00:53:36,129 -Let's tear it up. -Yeah. 688 00:53:44,054 --> 00:53:47,640 -What is it? -It's stuffed. 689 00:53:49,476 --> 00:53:50,685 [LION ROARS THEN BOYS SCREAM] 690 00:53:50,853 --> 00:53:53,646 BOTH: Mom! Mom! 691 00:53:53,814 --> 00:53:55,773 [BIRD WHOOPING] 692 00:54:04,408 --> 00:54:06,409 BOYS: He's alive. -What? Ugh. 693 00:54:06,577 --> 00:54:08,536 What have I told you about those lies of yours? 694 00:54:08,704 --> 00:54:09,746 No. Get away. 695 00:54:09,914 --> 00:54:11,789 [BOYS CRYING] 696 00:54:12,291 --> 00:54:14,667 Hey, don't step on my shoes. 697 00:54:15,169 --> 00:54:16,794 What have you done with Uncle Hub? 698 00:54:16,962 --> 00:54:20,423 Kid, get some meat. 699 00:54:20,591 --> 00:54:22,133 Where's Uncle Hub? 700 00:54:24,136 --> 00:54:26,304 Oh, Lord, there's been an accident. 701 00:54:27,765 --> 00:54:29,933 I want to go home now. 702 00:54:30,100 --> 00:54:31,768 You're in no shape to go home now. 703 00:54:31,936 --> 00:54:34,103 WALTER: It was a fight. Uncle Hub won. It was great. 704 00:54:34,271 --> 00:54:36,689 The lion really did try to eat us. 705 00:54:36,857 --> 00:54:39,484 HELEN: Shush. -Jasmine? 706 00:54:39,652 --> 00:54:42,278 Oh, Jasmine. I haven't fed her all day. 707 00:54:42,446 --> 00:54:44,781 I bet she's really hungry. I gotta go feed her. 708 00:54:44,949 --> 00:54:47,158 Here, here. 709 00:54:52,665 --> 00:54:54,707 Here you go, Jasmine. 710 00:54:57,711 --> 00:54:59,003 Jasmine? 711 00:54:59,171 --> 00:55:00,797 [JASMINE ROARING IN DISTANCE] 712 00:55:04,385 --> 00:55:07,845 -There really is a lion. FRANKIE: Lion? You got a lion? 713 00:55:08,013 --> 00:55:11,224 -It's locked up. -No, it isn't. It tried to eat us. 714 00:55:11,392 --> 00:55:13,726 -It really tried to eat us. HUB: Get the guns. 715 00:55:13,894 --> 00:55:15,603 GARTH: Get out of the way. HUB: Get the guns. 716 00:55:15,771 --> 00:55:17,522 HELEN: Come here, come here. 717 00:55:17,690 --> 00:55:18,731 Jasmine? 718 00:55:18,899 --> 00:55:20,900 [JASMINE ROARING] 719 00:55:28,993 --> 00:55:31,744 Jasmine? Jasmine? Jasmine? 720 00:55:31,912 --> 00:55:33,997 Come on. Oh. 721 00:55:37,960 --> 00:55:40,670 Ew, lion spit. No, ha, stop. 722 00:55:40,838 --> 00:55:43,756 Don't shoot, you'll hit him. 723 00:55:43,924 --> 00:55:45,883 WALTER: Come on. Whoa. 724 00:55:49,388 --> 00:55:50,972 [GUNS COCK] 725 00:55:51,140 --> 00:55:53,057 GARTH: They're gone. 726 00:55:53,225 --> 00:55:55,852 -We might be too late. -Move in. 727 00:55:57,396 --> 00:55:59,564 You stay. Stay. 728 00:56:11,493 --> 00:56:14,662 WALTER: Jasmine. Ha, ow. 729 00:56:14,830 --> 00:56:17,665 Ew. Stop, stop. 730 00:56:18,792 --> 00:56:19,959 [GASPS] 731 00:56:20,127 --> 00:56:21,461 Attack him. 732 00:56:25,466 --> 00:56:27,467 [PURRING] 733 00:56:29,303 --> 00:56:31,429 She's feeling a lot better. 734 00:56:35,142 --> 00:56:36,601 Get off of me. 735 00:56:38,771 --> 00:56:40,354 We're leaving. 736 00:56:41,023 --> 00:56:44,108 And we are not coming back until you get rid of that monster. 737 00:56:45,903 --> 00:56:50,364 -Well, the lion stays. -Ha, ha. 738 00:56:50,532 --> 00:56:52,950 All right, that's it. Come on, Daddy. 739 00:56:53,118 --> 00:56:54,744 Daddy! Come on. 740 00:56:54,912 --> 00:56:56,746 CHILDREN: Bye, Uncle Hub. Bye, Uncle Garth. 741 00:56:56,914 --> 00:56:58,831 Shut up. Get in the car. 742 00:56:58,999 --> 00:57:01,250 I need a drink bad. I'm having a bad day. 743 00:57:01,418 --> 00:57:03,336 GARTH: You boys hungry? 744 00:57:04,171 --> 00:57:07,340 -Wanna stay for supper? -What are we gonna eat? 745 00:57:07,508 --> 00:57:09,008 Meat. 746 00:57:09,676 --> 00:57:11,010 A lot of meat. 747 00:57:11,178 --> 00:57:12,178 [JASMINE ROARS] 748 00:57:12,346 --> 00:57:14,180 She won't come out of the cornfield. 749 00:57:14,765 --> 00:57:17,934 This cornfield's the closest thing to a jungle she's ever seen. 750 00:57:18,102 --> 00:57:20,686 She knows this is where she belongs. 751 00:57:20,854 --> 00:57:23,022 [JASMINE ROARING] 752 00:57:29,446 --> 00:57:32,323 -I think she's happy. HUB: I think she is. 753 00:57:36,036 --> 00:57:38,746 What about you? You happy? 754 00:57:51,718 --> 00:57:52,927 [HUB SPEAKING INDISTINCTLY] 755 00:57:53,095 --> 00:57:55,555 WALTER: What's he saying to them? -He's giving them his... 756 00:57:55,722 --> 00:57:58,516 ..."What every boy needs to know about being a man" speech. 757 00:58:00,519 --> 00:58:03,437 A lot of men have heard that speech over the years. 758 00:58:04,356 --> 00:58:06,566 A lot of men. 759 00:58:06,733 --> 00:58:10,153 -Will he give that speech to me? GARTH: Oh, I guarantee it. 760 00:58:10,320 --> 00:58:12,864 Assuming he's still around, of course. 761 00:58:18,287 --> 00:58:20,913 Hey, you didn't finish that story about Uncle Hub and Jasmine. 762 00:58:21,081 --> 00:58:24,041 -You don't believe this Africa stuff? -It's a good story. 763 00:58:26,211 --> 00:58:29,922 Well, after he rescued Jasmine... 764 00:58:30,090 --> 00:58:33,593 ...several years passed, wonderful years. 765 00:58:33,760 --> 00:58:36,470 [HORSES WH INNYING] 766 00:58:36,638 --> 00:58:39,015 GARTH: Never were two people so happy... 767 00:58:39,183 --> 00:58:41,100 ...so in love. 768 00:58:41,268 --> 00:58:44,228 It was perfect. 769 00:58:45,230 --> 00:58:47,023 Except for one thing. 770 00:58:47,774 --> 00:58:50,109 -The sheik. -The sheik. 771 00:58:51,111 --> 00:58:53,821 He hated Hub for stealing Jasmine... 772 00:58:53,989 --> 00:58:56,532 ...so he put a price on Hub's head: 773 00:58:56,700 --> 00:59:01,037 Ten thousand pieces of gold. A fortune. 774 00:59:02,122 --> 00:59:04,916 Assassins came from miles around. 775 00:59:10,214 --> 00:59:12,215 [GRUNTING AND SHOUTING] 776 00:59:18,764 --> 00:59:20,139 Come on. 777 00:59:20,307 --> 00:59:22,391 GARTH: He and Jasmine had to be on guard... 778 00:59:22,559 --> 00:59:24,644 ...every minute of every day. 779 00:59:24,811 --> 00:59:26,812 [GRUNTING AND SHOUTING] 780 00:59:46,124 --> 00:59:49,001 GARTH: Hub knew he and Jasmine couldn't run forever... 781 00:59:49,169 --> 00:59:52,421 ...that sooner or later their luck would run out. 782 00:59:55,968 --> 00:59:58,010 There was only one thing to do. 783 01:00:02,474 --> 01:00:06,811 So one day an assassin led Hub, bound in chains... 784 01:00:06,979 --> 01:00:08,729 ...into the sheik's fortress... 785 01:00:08,897 --> 01:00:11,524 ...to claim his 10,000 pieces of gold. 786 01:00:11,692 --> 01:00:13,067 What? 787 01:00:13,235 --> 01:00:14,944 [LAUGH ING] 788 01:00:15,112 --> 01:00:18,447 GARTH: They gave the assassin bags and bags of gold... 789 01:00:18,615 --> 01:00:20,074 ...as the sheik ordered Hub... 790 01:00:20,242 --> 01:00:26,414 ...down to the notorious Dungeon of 1387 Tortures. 791 01:00:29,710 --> 01:00:34,046 What kind of greedy, no-good scum would turn in Uncle Hub for money? 792 01:00:34,214 --> 01:00:37,508 Well, I would. 793 01:00:38,719 --> 01:00:40,720 [HUB GRUNTING] 794 01:00:42,014 --> 01:00:44,098 WALTER: Ah, it was a trick. 795 01:00:44,266 --> 01:00:47,184 GARTH: Yeah, it was a trick. 796 01:00:54,609 --> 01:00:56,277 In the dungeon, I drew my sword... 797 01:00:56,445 --> 01:00:58,446 [GRUNTING AND SHOUTING] 798 01:01:06,538 --> 01:01:09,248 ...and single-handedly slaughtered everyone in there... 799 01:01:09,416 --> 01:01:13,669 ...and freed Hub without dropping a single gold coin. 800 01:01:19,509 --> 01:01:21,635 WALTER: Wait a minute, wait a minute. 801 01:01:21,803 --> 01:01:23,637 You saved Uncle Hub... 802 01:01:23,805 --> 01:01:26,557 ...all this time carrying hundreds of pounds of gold? 803 01:01:28,060 --> 01:01:31,395 You don't believe I killed all those men and saved Hub? 804 01:01:34,066 --> 01:01:37,610 Well, Hub might've helped just a little. 805 01:01:37,778 --> 01:01:39,779 [GRUNTING AND SHOUTING] 806 01:01:55,170 --> 01:01:57,129 GARTH: We were greatly outnumbered. 807 01:01:57,297 --> 01:01:59,215 [MAN SCREAMS] 808 01:01:59,383 --> 01:02:01,300 GARTH: We fought against incredible odds. 809 01:02:01,468 --> 01:02:03,636 And when it was over, we split up. 810 01:02:03,804 --> 01:02:06,305 Each one knew what the other had to do. 811 01:02:06,473 --> 01:02:08,140 [COINS JINGLING] 812 01:02:11,353 --> 01:02:14,230 GARTH: High in his opulent bedchamber... 813 01:02:14,398 --> 01:02:16,482 ...the sheik slept. 814 01:02:18,527 --> 01:02:22,530 He awoke with Hub's sword across his throat. 815 01:02:23,949 --> 01:02:25,157 The sheik was terrified... 816 01:02:25,325 --> 01:02:28,536 ...but Hub just lowered his blade. 817 01:02:35,127 --> 01:02:37,586 "Defend yourself," Hub cried. 818 01:02:38,505 --> 01:02:40,297 And he threw the sheik a sword. 819 01:02:42,050 --> 01:02:44,051 [LAUGH ING] 820 01:02:45,846 --> 01:02:47,847 [GRUNTING AND SHOUTING] 821 01:02:57,357 --> 01:02:59,900 [LAUGH ING] 822 01:03:08,493 --> 01:03:12,413 GARTH: The sheik knew that he would surely die now... 823 01:03:12,581 --> 01:03:15,040 ...without even the right to beg for mercy. 824 01:03:15,208 --> 01:03:17,084 [WHIMPERING] 825 01:03:26,720 --> 01:03:28,554 GARTH: But Hub just said: 826 01:03:28,722 --> 01:03:33,058 "Twice I have held your life in my hands... 827 01:03:33,226 --> 01:03:36,395 ...and twice I have given it back to you. 828 01:03:37,606 --> 01:03:38,898 The next time.... 829 01:03:39,065 --> 01:03:42,109 Your life is mine. 830 01:03:47,949 --> 01:03:49,950 [HORSE WHINNIES] 831 01:03:50,118 --> 01:03:51,660 GARTH: And from that moment on... 832 01:03:51,828 --> 01:03:55,080 ...the assassination attempts stopped. 833 01:03:55,248 --> 01:03:57,583 Some say it was because the sheik... 834 01:03:57,751 --> 01:04:01,170 ...was afraid that Hub would return and kill him. 835 01:04:01,338 --> 01:04:04,798 Others said because Hub had spared his life... 836 01:04:04,966 --> 01:04:09,720 ...the sheik did the honorable thing and let his enemy live. 837 01:04:12,599 --> 01:04:15,267 Personally, I think it's because... 838 01:04:15,435 --> 01:04:18,604 ...the sheik was so damn busy once they discovered oil in his kingdom. 839 01:04:18,772 --> 01:04:21,690 He became one of the five richest men in the world. 840 01:04:22,859 --> 01:04:26,487 What? The bad guy gets filthy rich? 841 01:04:26,655 --> 01:04:27,780 [LAUGH ING] 842 01:04:27,948 --> 01:04:29,657 What the heck kind of story ends that way? 843 01:04:29,824 --> 01:04:31,784 I just told it the way it happened. 844 01:04:31,952 --> 01:04:33,911 FRANKIE: Bye. MAN 1: So long. 845 01:04:36,706 --> 01:04:38,374 So that's how you got all your money? 846 01:04:38,542 --> 01:04:40,668 -The gold from the sheik? -Well.... 847 01:04:41,253 --> 01:04:43,045 Yeah. 848 01:04:44,881 --> 01:04:47,466 Those young men will be okay now. 849 01:04:47,634 --> 01:04:50,594 -Will you? -Yeah. 850 01:04:52,305 --> 01:04:55,140 I feel old and worn out. Mm. 851 01:04:55,308 --> 01:04:57,142 -You've been busy. -Yeah. 852 01:04:58,186 --> 01:05:00,145 Terrorizing doctors and nurses... 853 01:05:00,313 --> 01:05:04,024 ...beating up teenagers, chasing after lions. 854 01:05:04,192 --> 01:05:06,402 You've had a full day. 855 01:05:08,989 --> 01:05:11,782 Lucky those boys don't know diddly-squat about fighting. 856 01:05:13,285 --> 01:05:15,411 Won't be long till the kid here can whup my ass. 857 01:05:18,790 --> 01:05:22,543 Won't be long till I'll be helpless in a fight. Useless. 858 01:05:22,711 --> 01:05:25,045 GARTH: You'll feel better in a day or two. 859 01:05:28,341 --> 01:05:30,342 Yeah, well... 860 01:05:30,510 --> 01:05:34,054 ... I'm going to bed. Good night, kid. 861 01:05:50,196 --> 01:05:52,364 So, ahem... 862 01:05:52,532 --> 01:05:54,783 ...you finally gonna tell me what happened to Jasmine? 863 01:05:54,951 --> 01:05:56,243 -Nope. -What? 864 01:05:57,037 --> 01:05:58,704 You wanna know what happened to Jasmine... 865 01:05:58,872 --> 01:06:00,164 ...you're gonna have to ask him. 866 01:06:01,750 --> 01:06:03,584 Ask Uncle Hub? 867 01:06:03,752 --> 01:06:06,045 Are you crazy? Look what happened last time. 868 01:06:06,212 --> 01:06:08,547 I'm tired of doing all the dirty work around here. 869 01:06:08,715 --> 01:06:10,883 If you wanna hear the end of this story... 870 01:06:11,051 --> 01:06:12,384 ...you're gonna have to ask him. 871 01:06:18,391 --> 01:06:19,683 [JASMINE ROARING] 872 01:06:24,356 --> 01:06:25,814 [DOGS BARKING] 873 01:06:42,624 --> 01:06:44,625 GARTH: Hub? -Yeah? 874 01:06:44,793 --> 01:06:47,628 GARTH: An airplane? -Yep, always wanted one. 875 01:06:47,796 --> 01:06:50,255 GARTH: You always said you'd never set foot in an airplane. 876 01:06:50,423 --> 01:06:52,925 You don't trust them to fall right out of the sky. 877 01:06:53,093 --> 01:06:55,302 They're dangerous, all right, plenty dangerous. 878 01:06:55,470 --> 01:06:57,763 You got a book of instructions or something? 879 01:06:57,931 --> 01:06:59,348 Yeah, right here. 880 01:06:59,516 --> 01:07:02,142 GARTH: You don't know a damn thing about airplanes. 881 01:07:02,310 --> 01:07:04,645 Well, I'm gonna learn, I tell you. 882 01:07:05,772 --> 01:07:08,440 Aha. It says right here: 883 01:07:08,608 --> 01:07:10,234 "To climb, pull back on the stick. 884 01:07:10,402 --> 01:07:12,319 To descend, push forward on the stick." 885 01:07:13,113 --> 01:07:15,114 I'll have this thing up in the air in no time. 886 01:07:15,281 --> 01:07:16,699 Whoo. Damn. 887 01:07:16,866 --> 01:07:18,283 [DOG BARKING] 888 01:07:20,245 --> 01:07:22,287 [METAL CLANGING] 889 01:07:27,794 --> 01:07:29,753 WALTER: Maybe it's just a new hobby. 890 01:07:30,338 --> 01:07:32,339 Maybe he doesn't really mean to... 891 01:07:33,633 --> 01:07:36,301 ...you know, do something crazy. 892 01:07:39,055 --> 01:07:40,097 You think so? 893 01:07:46,980 --> 01:07:48,522 You ask him yet? 894 01:07:49,691 --> 01:07:51,483 About Jasmine? 895 01:07:55,864 --> 01:07:57,823 You'd better make it quick. 896 01:08:55,089 --> 01:08:56,882 [SHOUTS] 897 01:08:59,427 --> 01:09:03,055 What the hell? It's the middle of the night. 898 01:09:04,641 --> 01:09:06,600 What's the matter? What are you doing here? 899 01:09:07,393 --> 01:09:09,728 You got something to say to me? 900 01:09:10,563 --> 01:09:12,189 Spit it out. 901 01:09:14,275 --> 01:09:16,401 What happened to her, Uncle Hub? 902 01:09:20,615 --> 01:09:22,741 What happened to Jasmine? 903 01:09:36,005 --> 01:09:39,758 I have to know. I have to. 904 01:09:44,222 --> 01:09:46,265 HUB: She died. 905 01:09:47,433 --> 01:09:49,643 Died in childbirth. Her and the baby. 906 01:10:01,781 --> 01:10:03,240 What did you do? 907 01:10:06,536 --> 01:10:10,080 HUB: Went back to the only life I knew. Back to the Legion. 908 01:10:30,268 --> 01:10:34,146 For the next 40 years, there was always one more war to fight. 909 01:10:35,857 --> 01:10:38,942 Then I got old and came here. 910 01:10:41,821 --> 01:10:44,281 Here I am. 911 01:10:45,408 --> 01:10:47,826 Here I am. 912 01:10:47,994 --> 01:10:50,329 You cold, son? 913 01:10:50,496 --> 01:10:52,497 You'd better-- Here. 914 01:10:52,665 --> 01:10:56,043 You'd better-- You'd better go inside. 915 01:10:57,128 --> 01:11:00,339 Good boy, thank you. Good boy. 916 01:11:01,215 --> 01:11:02,799 Those stories about Africa... 917 01:11:04,761 --> 01:11:07,179 ...about you... 918 01:11:08,139 --> 01:11:10,057 ...they're true, aren't they? 919 01:11:11,100 --> 01:11:13,977 -Doesn't matter. -It does too. 920 01:11:15,605 --> 01:11:19,107 Around my mom, all I hear is lies. I don't know what to believe in. 921 01:11:19,275 --> 01:11:21,485 If you wanna believe in something, then believe in it. 922 01:11:21,653 --> 01:11:24,863 Just because something isn't true, that's no reason you can't believe in it. 923 01:11:27,367 --> 01:11:28,909 All right. 924 01:11:29,077 --> 01:11:31,119 There's a long speech I give to young men... 925 01:11:31,287 --> 01:11:33,413 ...sounds like you need to hear a piece of it. 926 01:11:33,581 --> 01:11:35,791 Just a piece. 927 01:11:36,459 --> 01:11:40,087 Sometimes the things that may or may not be true... 928 01:11:40,254 --> 01:11:43,715 ...are the things that a man needs to believe in the most. 929 01:11:44,968 --> 01:11:48,053 That people are basically good. 930 01:11:48,221 --> 01:11:50,389 That honor... 931 01:11:50,556 --> 01:11:53,058 ...courage and virtue mean everything. 932 01:11:54,602 --> 01:11:57,771 That power and money, money and power mean nothing. 933 01:11:59,148 --> 01:12:02,067 That good always triumphs over evil. 934 01:12:03,194 --> 01:12:05,821 And I want you to remember this, that love.... 935 01:12:12,578 --> 01:12:16,206 True love never dies. You remember that, boy. 936 01:12:19,168 --> 01:12:21,294 You remember that. 937 01:12:21,462 --> 01:12:24,589 Doesn't matter if it's true or not. You see... 938 01:12:24,757 --> 01:12:27,342 ...a man should believe in those things, because... 939 01:12:28,386 --> 01:12:31,555 ...those are the things worth believing in. 940 01:12:32,974 --> 01:12:34,558 Got that? 941 01:12:36,436 --> 01:12:38,812 That was a good speech. 942 01:12:38,980 --> 01:12:41,648 Think so? Thanks. 943 01:12:41,816 --> 01:12:44,109 Yeah.... 944 01:12:44,277 --> 01:12:46,862 When are you gonna give me the rest of the speech? 945 01:12:48,281 --> 01:12:50,574 When you're almost a man. 946 01:12:51,117 --> 01:12:53,368 -You promise? -Wait one minute here. Wait-- 947 01:12:53,536 --> 01:12:57,164 I can't be a good man until you give me the rest of the speech, right? 948 01:12:57,331 --> 01:13:00,417 You need to stick around until I'm old enough to hear the whole thing. 949 01:13:00,585 --> 01:13:03,045 -I see what you're trying to pull. -You have to stick around... 950 01:13:03,212 --> 01:13:05,005 -...until I'm old enough. -I'll write it down. 951 01:13:05,173 --> 01:13:07,466 No. I want you to give me the speech. 952 01:13:07,633 --> 01:13:09,843 You won't be living here then. 953 01:13:10,011 --> 01:13:13,555 You're my uncle. I need you to stick around and be my uncle. 954 01:13:16,726 --> 01:13:18,018 What about Uncle Garth? 955 01:13:19,228 --> 01:13:21,396 He needs you. 956 01:13:21,564 --> 01:13:24,483 What about the dogs and the pig... 957 01:13:24,650 --> 01:13:27,194 ...and the lion? We all need you. I need you. 958 01:13:27,361 --> 01:13:29,196 -No, you're just being silly. -No, it's true. 959 01:13:29,363 --> 01:13:31,323 -You're being silly. -It's true. 960 01:13:34,327 --> 01:13:37,370 I know you miss Jasmine an awful, awful lot. 961 01:13:37,538 --> 01:13:39,081 [WALTER SOBBING] 962 01:13:39,248 --> 01:13:41,750 But if you go... 963 01:13:42,794 --> 01:13:45,837 ...we'll miss you just as much. 964 01:13:47,340 --> 01:13:49,841 It's true. 965 01:13:56,682 --> 01:13:58,725 All right, damn it, you win. 966 01:13:58,893 --> 01:14:01,728 I'll stick around and be your damn uncle. 967 01:14:02,522 --> 01:14:05,315 Don't expect me to be happy about it. 968 01:14:10,113 --> 01:14:12,697 All right? Deal? 969 01:14:13,825 --> 01:14:16,201 [GROANS] 970 01:14:20,414 --> 01:14:22,207 You're a good boy. 971 01:14:25,795 --> 01:14:29,381 You're a good boy. You're a good boy. 972 01:14:48,484 --> 01:14:50,569 [GROWLING] 973 01:15:09,380 --> 01:15:11,798 Walter, Walter. Get ready. Walter. 974 01:15:11,966 --> 01:15:13,008 [GUN COCKS] 975 01:15:14,468 --> 01:15:17,387 [LAUGH ING AND CHEERING] 976 01:15:26,731 --> 01:15:29,274 [DOOR CREAKS THEN SHUTS] 977 01:16:35,174 --> 01:16:37,759 [HAY RUSTLING] 978 01:17:30,771 --> 01:17:32,063 [DOG BARKS] 979 01:17:33,065 --> 01:17:34,816 [DOGS WHIMPERING] 980 01:17:39,405 --> 01:17:41,448 This money look stolen to you? 981 01:18:11,187 --> 01:18:13,772 [CAR APPROACHING] 982 01:18:35,252 --> 01:18:37,003 [MAE GIGGLING] 983 01:18:37,171 --> 01:18:40,173 Oh, honey, you're so funny. 984 01:18:40,341 --> 01:18:42,050 No. 985 01:18:42,218 --> 01:18:44,344 MAN: Whoo. MAE: Oh! 986 01:18:44,512 --> 01:18:46,346 [WHISPERS] Shh, quiet. 987 01:18:49,642 --> 01:18:52,352 -Mom. MAE: Hi, honey. 988 01:18:54,230 --> 01:18:57,065 Walter, Walter, this is Stan. 989 01:18:57,233 --> 01:18:59,359 I've heard a lot about you, Walter. Heh. 990 01:18:59,527 --> 01:19:01,486 Your uncles still sleeping? 991 01:19:01,654 --> 01:19:02,946 Best not wake them up. 992 01:19:03,114 --> 01:19:05,073 Shh, come on. Wanna go sit down? 993 01:19:07,493 --> 01:19:09,452 You got so big. 994 01:19:12,998 --> 01:19:16,209 So Stan here is a detective. 995 01:19:16,377 --> 01:19:19,254 A real private eye, just like in the movies. 996 01:19:19,422 --> 01:19:21,381 -Wow, really? -Sure, sure. 997 01:19:21,549 --> 01:19:23,550 You wanna see my badge? 998 01:19:23,717 --> 01:19:25,760 MAE: Stan works in Las Vegas. How about that? 999 01:19:29,098 --> 01:19:32,100 -What about court reporting school? MAE: Oh, I had to quit. 1000 01:19:32,268 --> 01:19:35,103 Stan wants me to stay home and be a wife and mother. Ha, ha. 1001 01:19:35,271 --> 01:19:36,771 Won't that be wonderful? 1002 01:19:37,356 --> 01:19:38,898 [MAE GIGGLES] 1003 01:19:40,151 --> 01:19:42,944 I bet you found out where your uncles hid all that money, huh? 1004 01:19:46,115 --> 01:19:47,240 Why do you wanna know? 1005 01:19:47,408 --> 01:19:48,700 [CLEARS THROAT] 1006 01:19:48,868 --> 01:19:51,578 Walt, your uncles match the description... 1007 01:19:51,745 --> 01:19:54,080 ...of two bank robbers from the '20s and '30s. 1008 01:19:54,248 --> 01:19:56,708 -No, you're wrong. -When Mae told me about them... 1009 01:19:56,876 --> 01:19:59,043 ... I got copies of the reports and showed them to her. 1010 01:19:59,211 --> 01:20:01,212 It's them, honey. 1011 01:20:01,380 --> 01:20:04,132 They used shotguns. They wore disguises. 1012 01:20:04,300 --> 01:20:07,427 They stole all that money. And they shot people... 1013 01:20:07,595 --> 01:20:08,928 ...innocent people. 1014 01:20:09,763 --> 01:20:12,223 No, not them. It can't be. 1015 01:20:12,391 --> 01:20:14,476 Stan knows what he's talking about, honey. 1016 01:20:14,643 --> 01:20:16,895 What about Jasmine? 1017 01:20:17,062 --> 01:20:18,938 She and Uncle Hub were in love. They-- 1018 01:20:19,106 --> 01:20:21,733 -I have her picture. -Honey, wasn't Jasmine... 1019 01:20:21,901 --> 01:20:24,110 ...the woman who was driving the getaway car? 1020 01:20:24,278 --> 01:20:27,113 -Oh, right. STAN: Oh, Jasmine. 1021 01:20:27,281 --> 01:20:29,616 She was wounded. 1022 01:20:29,783 --> 01:20:32,744 And they just drove off... 1023 01:20:33,829 --> 01:20:36,080 ...and left her for dead. 1024 01:20:38,501 --> 01:20:40,335 I know this hurts, son. 1025 01:20:42,671 --> 01:20:45,632 But they're criminals, and they lied to you. 1026 01:20:45,799 --> 01:20:48,635 My poor baby. 1027 01:20:48,802 --> 01:20:51,804 Oh, in the arms of vicious criminals. 1028 01:20:51,972 --> 01:20:54,098 We came just as soon as we found out. 1029 01:20:54,266 --> 01:20:57,602 We've come to take you away. Now, I want you to tell Stan... 1030 01:20:57,770 --> 01:21:00,146 ...where the money is, then we'll go pack your things, okay? 1031 01:21:04,360 --> 01:21:06,861 Why do you need to know where the money is? 1032 01:21:07,029 --> 01:21:08,696 Look at me, son. 1033 01:21:09,698 --> 01:21:11,699 Because it doesn't belong to them. 1034 01:21:12,535 --> 01:21:14,661 It's stolen. 1035 01:21:14,828 --> 01:21:18,164 Why, it's probably hidden right outside here somewhere, right? 1036 01:21:18,332 --> 01:21:19,958 Close by? 1037 01:21:24,004 --> 01:21:26,631 I'll tell you what, uh, why don't we take a little walk, huh? 1038 01:21:27,007 --> 01:21:28,091 Show us around the place. 1039 01:21:28,259 --> 01:21:30,260 -What do you say? MAE: Let's go. 1040 01:21:34,848 --> 01:21:38,309 Well, Walt, your mother and I found a nice house. 1041 01:21:38,936 --> 01:21:40,979 Don't have enough money for the down payment though. 1042 01:21:41,146 --> 01:21:44,107 We could always turn your uncles in for the reward money... 1043 01:21:44,275 --> 01:21:45,316 ...but they'd go to jail. 1044 01:21:45,484 --> 01:21:47,026 Since all that money's stolen, honey... 1045 01:21:47,194 --> 01:21:49,404 ...we got a right to it just as much as they do. 1046 01:21:49,572 --> 01:21:51,364 We'll have a nice family and nobody gets hurt. 1047 01:21:51,532 --> 01:21:55,368 Isn't it wonderful, Walter? It's what we always wanted. 1048 01:21:55,536 --> 01:21:57,036 So where is it? 1049 01:21:57,204 --> 01:21:59,330 Come on. They're old, they're gonna die soon anyway. 1050 01:21:59,498 --> 01:22:01,249 You want Uncle Sam to end up with that dough? 1051 01:22:01,417 --> 01:22:03,751 Just tell us. 1052 01:22:13,512 --> 01:22:16,180 Hub and Garth didn't rob any banks. They were in Africa. 1053 01:22:16,348 --> 01:22:18,683 Africa? Oh, Walter, be serious. 1054 01:22:18,851 --> 01:22:21,394 Really. They were shanghaied into the Foreign Legion... 1055 01:22:21,562 --> 01:22:24,272 ...and had adventures for 40 years. They couldn't have robbed banks. 1056 01:22:24,440 --> 01:22:26,274 Come on. You don't believe all that, do you? 1057 01:22:26,442 --> 01:22:29,652 -Sure, I do. -You? Mr. Doubting Thomas? 1058 01:22:29,820 --> 01:22:33,698 Here Stan's got actual evidence, and you believe that Africa crap? 1059 01:22:36,035 --> 01:22:37,869 Yes. Yes, I do. 1060 01:22:39,747 --> 01:22:41,748 Mae, you should go wait on the porch. 1061 01:22:41,915 --> 01:22:44,042 We're gonna have a little chat, man to man. 1062 01:22:44,209 --> 01:22:46,669 Why don't we talk in the barn? What do you say? 1063 01:22:58,474 --> 01:23:00,433 Come on. 1064 01:23:01,435 --> 01:23:03,603 Getting warmer? Huh? 1065 01:23:05,648 --> 01:23:07,440 WALTER: No, let go. 1066 01:23:08,525 --> 01:23:10,068 [WALTER GROANING] 1067 01:23:10,235 --> 01:23:12,945 STAN: Let's you and me get something straight. 1068 01:23:13,113 --> 01:23:15,907 We can be friends or we can be enemies. 1069 01:23:16,075 --> 01:23:17,909 I've had a run of crummy luck lately. 1070 01:23:18,077 --> 01:23:21,287 I know some bad people who wanna cause a lot of trouble for me. 1071 01:23:21,455 --> 01:23:23,748 I need that money, and I know it's close. 1072 01:23:23,916 --> 01:23:25,583 And I'll be damned if some... 1073 01:23:25,751 --> 01:23:28,252 ...snot-nosed kid is gonna stand in my way. 1074 01:23:28,420 --> 01:23:30,713 So, what's it gonna be, pal? 1075 01:23:31,215 --> 01:23:34,092 Friends or enemies? 1076 01:23:42,893 --> 01:23:45,728 -Defend yourself. -Huh? 1077 01:23:46,522 --> 01:23:47,897 [GROANING] 1078 01:23:59,993 --> 01:24:02,370 STAN: Where is it? 1079 01:24:02,538 --> 01:24:04,080 Where's the money? Where is it? 1080 01:24:04,248 --> 01:24:06,082 [WALTER GRUNTING] 1081 01:24:06,250 --> 01:24:09,293 STAN: Where is it? Where is it? 1082 01:24:09,461 --> 01:24:10,628 [GROWLING] 1083 01:24:11,630 --> 01:24:14,424 STAN: Tell me where it is. 1084 01:24:14,591 --> 01:24:15,925 Tell me where it is. 1085 01:24:16,510 --> 01:24:17,552 Where is it? 1086 01:24:17,720 --> 01:24:19,137 [JASMINE ROARING] 1087 01:24:21,390 --> 01:24:23,141 [STAN SCREAMING] 1088 01:24:29,481 --> 01:24:31,774 MAE: I heard some noise. 1089 01:24:32,693 --> 01:24:34,360 Oh, God. 1090 01:24:36,989 --> 01:24:38,364 Jasmine? 1091 01:24:42,035 --> 01:24:47,039 Oh, my goodness. Oh, my goodness. Stan. 1092 01:24:47,416 --> 01:24:48,541 It's dead. 1093 01:24:48,709 --> 01:24:51,335 Oh, my God, he's dead. Stan's dead. 1094 01:24:51,503 --> 01:24:53,087 He'll live. I'm talking about the lion. 1095 01:24:53,255 --> 01:24:54,797 MAE: Oh! 1096 01:24:54,965 --> 01:24:57,884 We have to get him to the hospital. Mae, get your car. 1097 01:24:58,051 --> 01:24:59,886 -I can't, I can't. -Mae, your car. 1098 01:25:00,053 --> 01:25:02,513 -Get it, get it. -Okay, okay. 1099 01:25:02,681 --> 01:25:04,891 GARTH: Let's get this lion off him. HUB: Okay. 1100 01:25:05,058 --> 01:25:07,185 [BOTH GRUNTING] 1101 01:25:08,896 --> 01:25:11,731 -This man's gonna need stitches. -A lot of damn stitches. 1102 01:25:11,899 --> 01:25:13,316 [STAN GROANS] 1103 01:25:13,484 --> 01:25:15,026 What happened to her? 1104 01:25:16,028 --> 01:25:19,030 Looks like her heart gave out in all the excitement. 1105 01:25:19,198 --> 01:25:21,574 -Yeah. -She was plenty old, you know? 1106 01:25:24,119 --> 01:25:25,578 Look. 1107 01:25:26,997 --> 01:25:28,706 I think she's smiling. 1108 01:25:28,874 --> 01:25:32,752 Yeah. I guess she died happy. 1109 01:25:34,546 --> 01:25:36,881 She died with her boots on, that's the main thing. 1110 01:25:37,299 --> 01:25:39,550 Protecting her cub. 1111 01:25:45,516 --> 01:25:48,267 She was a real lion, wasn't she? 1112 01:25:48,894 --> 01:25:50,019 There at the end. 1113 01:25:51,063 --> 01:25:52,355 Sure. 1114 01:25:52,940 --> 01:25:55,233 WALTER: A real jungle lion. 1115 01:25:57,903 --> 01:26:00,363 A real Africa lion. 1116 01:26:25,138 --> 01:26:27,348 You finished packing? 1117 01:26:30,727 --> 01:26:33,396 GARTH: Your momma's gonna be back from the hospital soon. 1118 01:26:34,106 --> 01:26:36,983 You can wait for her on the front porch. 1119 01:26:48,078 --> 01:26:50,872 [SWING MUSIC PLAYING ON CAR RADIO] 1120 01:26:56,962 --> 01:26:58,713 MAE: Stay right here. 1121 01:26:58,881 --> 01:27:00,965 Don't you move a muscle. 1122 01:27:05,429 --> 01:27:08,055 So you all packed? Where's your suitcase? 1123 01:27:08,223 --> 01:27:09,765 [DOG BARKING] 1124 01:27:09,933 --> 01:27:11,058 Don't be fresh. 1125 01:27:11,226 --> 01:27:12,560 [WHIMPERS] 1126 01:27:12,978 --> 01:27:16,022 -Upstairs in my room. -Well, let's go get it. 1127 01:27:25,490 --> 01:27:26,574 Howdy, Stan. 1128 01:27:26,742 --> 01:27:27,950 [STAN MUMBLES] 1129 01:27:30,996 --> 01:27:33,331 You know, you're lucky, Stan. 1130 01:27:33,498 --> 01:27:35,917 Lucky that lion got to you before we did. 1131 01:27:36,084 --> 01:27:37,460 [STAN GROANS] 1132 01:27:38,754 --> 01:27:41,172 I wonder what your uncles are saying to Stan. 1133 01:27:42,966 --> 01:27:46,385 Probably their "What every boy needs to know about being a man" speech. 1134 01:27:46,553 --> 01:27:50,389 Well, I'm glad to see they're making friends. 1135 01:27:51,266 --> 01:27:53,726 So you all set? 1136 01:27:55,437 --> 01:27:57,229 Let's go. 1137 01:27:58,190 --> 01:28:02,652 To make a long story short, Stan, you and me, we can be friends... 1138 01:28:02,819 --> 01:28:04,862 ...or we can be enemies. 1139 01:28:05,030 --> 01:28:06,113 [STAN GROANS] 1140 01:28:08,450 --> 01:28:11,744 MAE: Well, boys, I hope Walter wasn't too much trouble. 1141 01:28:11,912 --> 01:28:14,705 HUB: We managed. -What's gonna happen to him? 1142 01:28:14,873 --> 01:28:17,541 A man like that's got no business being around your boy. 1143 01:28:17,709 --> 01:28:21,253 Well, of course not. What kind of mother would I be? 1144 01:28:21,421 --> 01:28:23,255 I'm gonna drop him off in Las Vegas. 1145 01:28:36,019 --> 01:28:39,230 I'll be back for the... 1146 01:28:39,398 --> 01:28:41,941 ...rest of that speech if.... 1147 01:28:43,485 --> 01:28:45,695 I'll be here. 1148 01:28:53,453 --> 01:28:55,329 Good boy. 1149 01:29:01,920 --> 01:29:03,963 WALTER: Thanks for the stories... 1150 01:29:04,131 --> 01:29:07,091 ...and everything. It-- it-- 1151 01:29:07,259 --> 01:29:09,593 It meant an-- 1152 01:29:09,761 --> 01:29:12,596 An awful, awful lot. 1153 01:29:14,725 --> 01:29:16,559 I'm glad. 1154 01:29:31,908 --> 01:29:34,952 MAE: Well, come on, honey. We're burning daylight. 1155 01:29:50,635 --> 01:29:52,261 [DOGS WHIMPERING] 1156 01:30:01,605 --> 01:30:03,314 [CAR STARTS] 1157 01:30:11,698 --> 01:30:15,534 Damn. She doesn't deserve that kid. 1158 01:30:15,702 --> 01:30:17,828 Maybe we should get a lawyer. 1159 01:30:17,996 --> 01:30:20,164 No judge is gonna take a child away from its mother... 1160 01:30:20,332 --> 01:30:23,042 ...and give it to two old bachelor uncles. 1161 01:30:23,210 --> 01:30:25,795 Maybe she'll sell him to us. How much money we got? 1162 01:30:25,962 --> 01:30:27,838 Hub. 1163 01:30:28,006 --> 01:30:31,884 There's nothing we can do. He's gone. 1164 01:30:58,620 --> 01:31:01,580 [MAE HUMMING] 1165 01:31:07,879 --> 01:31:12,550 -So where are we going? -I told you, Las Vegas. 1166 01:31:12,717 --> 01:31:16,178 I mean after. After we drop Stan off. 1167 01:31:16,346 --> 01:31:20,307 Well, honey, ugh, Stan's gonna need a lot of looking after. 1168 01:31:24,229 --> 01:31:25,479 [CHUCKLES] 1169 01:31:34,489 --> 01:31:36,157 Walter! 1170 01:31:37,784 --> 01:31:39,076 What are you doing? 1171 01:31:41,621 --> 01:31:43,289 Oh, my God. 1172 01:31:43,456 --> 01:31:44,832 [STAN GROAN ING] 1173 01:31:49,462 --> 01:31:50,838 [STAN GROAN ING] 1174 01:31:51,006 --> 01:31:52,715 Walter! Walter! 1175 01:31:53,800 --> 01:31:56,594 Walter, stop! 1176 01:31:56,761 --> 01:31:58,762 Stop right there! 1177 01:31:59,764 --> 01:32:01,599 What's gotten into you? 1178 01:32:03,101 --> 01:32:07,813 Oh, honey, are you all right? You gave me a heart attack. 1179 01:32:07,981 --> 01:32:10,816 You're still marrying him after everything. 1180 01:32:10,984 --> 01:32:12,484 Oh, he's not so bad. 1181 01:32:12,652 --> 01:32:15,112 A little rough around the edges, but he can change. 1182 01:32:15,280 --> 01:32:16,864 Mom! 1183 01:32:18,450 --> 01:32:20,326 He says he loves me. 1184 01:32:20,493 --> 01:32:24,079 -Has he hit you yet? -Mind your own business. 1185 01:32:26,666 --> 01:32:29,877 You always think a new boyfriend solves everything... 1186 01:32:30,045 --> 01:32:33,130 ...but you always pick losers, and he's the worst of them all. 1187 01:32:35,008 --> 01:32:39,303 Walter, I had no choice. 1188 01:32:41,973 --> 01:32:43,766 Maybe you don't. 1189 01:32:46,144 --> 01:32:47,645 What? 1190 01:32:51,942 --> 01:32:54,985 -Mom? -What? 1191 01:33:00,075 --> 01:33:02,785 WALTER: Do something for me. 1192 01:33:03,662 --> 01:33:05,329 For once. 1193 01:33:07,832 --> 01:33:10,709 Do something that's best for me. 1194 01:33:11,711 --> 01:33:12,836 Okay? 1195 01:33:54,921 --> 01:33:58,841 Salesmen ought to be here in two, three hours. 1196 01:33:59,009 --> 01:34:01,760 Whoop-de-doo. 1197 01:34:06,391 --> 01:34:07,891 [DOGS WHIMPERING] 1198 01:34:10,729 --> 01:34:11,770 Lookie yonder. 1199 01:34:11,938 --> 01:34:13,814 [DOGS BARKING] 1200 01:34:50,101 --> 01:34:52,102 Okay, if I'm gonna live here... 1201 01:34:52,270 --> 01:34:54,271 ...there's gonna be some conditions. 1202 01:34:55,273 --> 01:34:56,940 Conditions? Ha. 1203 01:34:57,108 --> 01:34:59,026 One, you two gotta stick around... 1204 01:34:59,194 --> 01:35:01,195 ...until I'm through with high school at least... 1205 01:35:01,363 --> 01:35:02,780 ...preferably college. 1206 01:35:02,947 --> 01:35:04,907 You both got responsibilities now: 1207 01:35:05,075 --> 01:35:07,659 PTA, Boy Scouts, Little League... 1208 01:35:07,827 --> 01:35:09,620 ...the works. 1209 01:35:09,788 --> 01:35:11,789 Sounds like we don't have much choice. 1210 01:35:13,041 --> 01:35:16,960 Two, you both gotta take better care of yourselves. 1211 01:35:17,128 --> 01:35:18,337 More vegetables, less meat. 1212 01:35:18,505 --> 01:35:19,963 [HUB GROANS] 1213 01:35:20,507 --> 01:35:23,801 I wonder if, uh, traveling salesmen sells school supplies? 1214 01:35:23,968 --> 01:35:28,013 And three, no more dangerous stuff. 1215 01:35:28,181 --> 01:35:31,517 -No fighting teenagers, no airplanes-- -Now, wait one minute. 1216 01:35:31,684 --> 01:35:33,477 At least till I'm through with college. 1217 01:35:33,645 --> 01:35:36,438 -Maybe longer. -What do you expect us to die of? 1218 01:35:36,606 --> 01:35:37,940 Old age? 1219 01:35:46,032 --> 01:35:47,491 Well.... 1220 01:35:51,079 --> 01:35:53,247 Welcome home. 1221 01:36:21,651 --> 01:36:23,902 [GARTH & HUB YELLING AND LAUGH ING] 1222 01:36:30,368 --> 01:36:33,704 [PHONE RINGING] 1223 01:36:37,208 --> 01:36:39,251 WALTER: Hello? MAN [OVER PHONE]: Walter? 1224 01:36:39,419 --> 01:36:42,212 WALTER: Yes? GRADY: This is Sheriff Grady. 1225 01:36:42,380 --> 01:36:44,590 I'm afraid I have some bad news for you. 1226 01:36:44,757 --> 01:36:47,134 It's about your two uncles. 1227 01:36:47,302 --> 01:36:49,928 Uh, I'm sorry, they passed away. 1228 01:36:50,096 --> 01:36:52,306 There was an accident... 1229 01:36:52,474 --> 01:36:55,559 ...and it's a blessing that they didn't suffer. 1230 01:36:55,727 --> 01:36:59,563 It's a blessing too, in a way, that they went together. 1231 01:36:59,731 --> 01:37:02,149 You understand. 1232 01:37:02,317 --> 01:37:04,401 I'm over here at your uncles' place now. 1233 01:37:04,569 --> 01:37:06,403 You need to come on over here. 1234 01:37:06,571 --> 01:37:08,822 You need to see this for yourself. 1235 01:38:15,390 --> 01:38:17,307 GRADY: Walter? -How you doing? 1236 01:38:17,475 --> 01:38:18,850 All right. 1237 01:38:26,192 --> 01:38:28,151 Best I can figure, they were trying to fly... 1238 01:38:28,319 --> 01:38:30,487 ...through that barn upside down. 1239 01:38:34,284 --> 01:38:37,744 Had a bunch of reporters out here earlier, even CNN. 1240 01:38:37,912 --> 01:38:40,330 I guess any time a biplane... 1241 01:38:40,498 --> 01:38:43,667 ...from the First World War crashes doing acrobatics... 1242 01:38:43,835 --> 01:38:46,003 ...being flown by two 90-year-old men-- 1243 01:38:46,170 --> 01:38:48,630 Neither one of them with pilot's licenses. 1244 01:38:48,798 --> 01:38:51,174 --well.... Ha-ha-ha. 1245 01:38:52,302 --> 01:38:55,178 Well, they had a good long run, both of them. 1246 01:38:55,930 --> 01:38:58,557 They went out with their boots on. 1247 01:39:00,560 --> 01:39:01,852 Ha, ha. 1248 01:39:02,186 --> 01:39:05,606 Here. I found their will. 1249 01:39:10,445 --> 01:39:12,029 [CHUCKLES] 1250 01:39:14,157 --> 01:39:16,033 "The kid gets it all. 1251 01:39:17,535 --> 01:39:20,537 Just plant us in the damn garden... 1252 01:39:21,706 --> 01:39:23,999 ...with the stupid lion." 1253 01:39:25,960 --> 01:39:27,961 [HELICOPTER WHIRRING] 1254 01:39:41,976 --> 01:39:43,977 GRADY: Hey. 1255 01:39:44,145 --> 01:39:46,521 We've got some company. 1256 01:40:09,587 --> 01:40:11,755 This is it. 1257 01:40:11,923 --> 01:40:13,090 This is where they lived. 1258 01:40:15,385 --> 01:40:17,094 It's okay. Come here, buddy. 1259 01:40:17,637 --> 01:40:20,305 Come here. Look at this. 1260 01:40:20,473 --> 01:40:22,516 Look at this. 1261 01:40:24,602 --> 01:40:26,269 Uh, forgive me. 1262 01:40:26,437 --> 01:40:29,106 We were in Houston when we heard their names on the news... 1263 01:40:29,273 --> 01:40:31,942 ...and, well, we just had to come. 1264 01:40:32,110 --> 01:40:35,487 When I was a boy, my grandfather told me such stories. 1265 01:40:35,655 --> 01:40:39,032 -Your grandfather? -A very wealthy sheik. 1266 01:40:39,951 --> 01:40:42,869 He used to love to tell me stories about his wild youth. 1267 01:40:43,037 --> 01:40:46,748 Amazing, unbelievable stories all about two brothers... 1268 01:40:46,916 --> 01:40:48,542 ...Hub and Garth McCann... 1269 01:40:48,710 --> 01:40:52,170 ...the most valiant and brave men, huh? 1270 01:40:52,338 --> 01:40:55,465 He called them his most honored adversaries. 1271 01:40:55,633 --> 01:40:57,759 [ARABIC ACCENT] "The only men who outsmarted me." 1272 01:40:57,927 --> 01:40:59,136 [CHUCKLES] 1273 01:40:59,303 --> 01:41:00,679 [IN NORMAL VOICE] Wait, so you--? 1274 01:41:02,140 --> 01:41:03,974 You knew these two men? 1275 01:41:05,226 --> 01:41:07,394 They raised me. 1276 01:41:08,312 --> 01:41:09,855 It's an honor. Ha, ha. 1277 01:41:10,773 --> 01:41:13,984 -Nice to meet you. -It's nice to meet you. 1278 01:41:14,152 --> 01:41:15,569 Wow. 1279 01:41:17,905 --> 01:41:19,823 Aha. 1280 01:41:19,991 --> 01:41:21,825 I see they spent my grandfather's gold wisely. 1281 01:41:21,993 --> 01:41:23,160 Yeah. 1282 01:41:23,327 --> 01:41:25,454 [BOTH LAUGHING] 1283 01:41:26,539 --> 01:41:29,708 Well, there was this one traveling salesman. 1284 01:41:29,876 --> 01:41:31,877 [CHUCKLING] 1285 01:41:32,044 --> 01:41:33,336 BOY: So... 1286 01:41:33,504 --> 01:41:35,881 ...the two men from great-grandfather's stories... 1287 01:41:36,048 --> 01:41:37,507 ...they really lived? 1288 01:41:40,678 --> 01:41:42,804 Yeah. 1289 01:41:44,390 --> 01:41:46,933 They really lived. 1290 01:49:04,622 --> 01:49:06,623 [ENGLISH SDH] 87823