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These are the user uploaded subtitles that are being translated: 1 00:00:15,319 --> 00:00:18,409 Look at what's happened to me 2 00:00:18,453 --> 00:00:22,500 I can't believe it myself 3 00:00:22,544 --> 00:00:26,765 Suddenly I'm up on top of the world 4 00:00:26,809 --> 00:00:32,684 It should have been somebody else 5 00:00:32,728 --> 00:00:35,818 Believe it or not I'm walking on air 6 00:00:35,861 --> 00:00:40,170 I never thought I could feel so free 7 00:00:40,214 --> 00:00:44,479 Flying away on a wing and a prayer 8 00:00:44,522 --> 00:00:48,613 Who could it be 9 00:00:48,657 --> 00:00:52,748 Believe it or not it's just me 10 00:00:55,142 --> 00:00:58,623 Just like the light of a new day 11 00:00:58,667 --> 00:01:02,627 It hit me from out of the blue 12 00:01:02,671 --> 00:01:05,935 Breaking me out of the spell I was in 13 00:01:05,978 --> 00:01:11,071 Making all of my wishes come true 14 00:01:12,420 --> 00:01:16,467 Believe it or not I'm walking on air 15 00:01:16,511 --> 00:01:20,602 I never thought I could feel so free 16 00:01:20,645 --> 00:01:24,780 Flying away on a wing and a prayer 17 00:01:24,823 --> 00:01:28,914 Who could it be 18 00:01:28,958 --> 00:01:33,354 Believe it or not it's just me 19 00:01:34,616 --> 00:01:39,142 Who could it be 20 00:01:39,186 --> 00:01:43,799 Believe it or not it's just me 21 00:02:03,035 --> 00:02:06,256 He's got a heart as big as Texas 22 00:02:09,390 --> 00:02:13,263 He's got a smile to warm the night 23 00:02:16,223 --> 00:02:20,879 And he's a champion of everything that's right 24 00:02:20,923 --> 00:02:23,969 He's a good guy 25 00:02:29,975 --> 00:02:33,457 He likes to set a good example 26 00:02:36,330 --> 00:02:39,681 For all the children that he meets 27 00:02:41,944 --> 00:02:47,776 Ooh And so you know he never lies or steals or cheats 28 00:02:47,819 --> 00:02:49,778 'Cause he's a good guy Good guy 29 00:02:55,392 --> 00:02:59,309 Good guys used to be so easy to spot 30 00:03:01,920 --> 00:03:06,098 Ooh, nowadays they're not 31 00:03:07,752 --> 00:03:11,887 I'm lookin' for the good guys 32 00:03:14,194 --> 00:03:17,545 Where could they be Where could they be 33 00:03:20,939 --> 00:03:26,945 I'm lookin' for the good guys 34 00:03:26,989 --> 00:03:30,993 Here's lookin' at me - 35 00:03:33,169 --> 00:03:37,042 - Yeah? - Herb, it's Calvin. 36 00:03:37,086 --> 00:03:39,001 Somebody just let themselves into our office. 37 00:03:39,044 --> 00:03:41,351 You think it's Donato? 38 00:03:41,395 --> 00:03:45,355 Could be. He's getting crazy. He acts like he's been taking his own pills. 39 00:03:45,399 --> 00:03:48,924 What's he doing in the office? 40 00:03:48,967 --> 00:03:51,187 You think he knows we're keeping a file on him? 41 00:03:59,804 --> 00:04:03,634 Look. You're a lot closer to the office than I am. You'd better get over there, 42 00:04:03,678 --> 00:04:05,984 fast. I'm in my pajamas. 43 00:04:06,028 --> 00:04:09,988 You look a lot better in your pajamas than a pine box. Now go. 44 00:04:10,032 --> 00:04:13,731 Okay, okay. I'm going. 45 00:04:48,244 --> 00:04:50,028 Cal, It's me. What's going on? 46 00:04:52,030 --> 00:04:54,076 You're not gonna believe it. It's Mickey. 47 00:04:54,119 --> 00:04:58,080 Mickey? I can't figure that one. 48 00:05:00,256 --> 00:05:02,998 He just sneaked out of the place. I'm not kidding. 49 00:05:05,392 --> 00:05:09,961 Herb, I'd better call Donato. We'd better put him aboard. He's gonna freak. 50 00:05:10,005 --> 00:05:13,704 Meet me at the factory in 20 minutes.Right. 51 00:05:13,748 --> 00:05:17,317 Maxwell, Interstate Narcotics desk. 52 00:05:17,360 --> 00:05:21,233 Yes, there's a truck leaving from L.A. tomorrow. 53 00:05:21,277 --> 00:05:23,192 I don't know what warehouse it's from, 54 00:05:23,235 --> 00:05:26,500 but it, uh, has a load of amphetamines on board. 55 00:05:26,543 --> 00:05:30,895 It's heading to Tucson on Interstate Five. 56 00:05:30,939 --> 00:05:34,116 - Uh, who is this, please? - John Q. Anonymous. 57 00:05:34,159 --> 00:05:37,380 Aw, come on, pal. You wanna tie a knot in their tail, let's be friends here. 58 00:05:37,424 --> 00:05:39,687 What's your name? 59 00:05:39,730 --> 00:05:43,560 The truck is hauling stuff for Hamburger Heaven. 60 00:05:43,604 --> 00:05:46,389 Now, look. There'll be two case of reds in the back. 61 00:05:46,433 --> 00:05:49,479 They'll be near the state line somewhere around 10:00, 10:30. 62 00:05:59,228 --> 00:06:02,579 Look, Mr. Friago. We're real sorry to disturb you. 63 00:06:02,623 --> 00:06:05,408 But we thought if we didn't tell you about his being in there, 64 00:06:05,452 --> 00:06:07,497 it might be a big mistake. 65 00:06:07,541 --> 00:06:11,632 Sidney. Come on, fellas. We ain't talkin' about... 66 00:06:11,675 --> 00:06:14,199 the guy with the hamburger on his chest? 67 00:06:14,243 --> 00:06:16,419 Captain What's-his-face? Yeah. 68 00:06:16,463 --> 00:06:20,989 Captain Bellybuster, our mascot. The guy was always weird, 69 00:06:21,032 --> 00:06:23,295 never wanting to be photographed out of his costume... 70 00:06:23,339 --> 00:06:26,560 in case kids might find out there wasn't any such guy. 71 00:06:26,603 --> 00:06:28,692 See, what I don't understand is... 72 00:06:28,736 --> 00:06:32,174 what you're doin' with this kind of info in your office... 73 00:06:32,217 --> 00:06:36,178 Unless you two guys is lookin' to trade me out of the picture. 74 00:06:36,221 --> 00:06:39,399 Maybe cop a plea with the D.A.? That's it, ain't it? 75 00:06:39,442 --> 00:06:42,140 I loan you two goofs the money to open these burger joints, 76 00:06:42,184 --> 00:06:46,318 and you pay me back by keeping records on our private transactions... 77 00:06:46,362 --> 00:06:49,234 so if the ax falls, you can turn state's evidence. 78 00:06:49,278 --> 00:06:51,759 This makes me very, very uptight. 79 00:06:51,802 --> 00:06:54,501 So, I'm gonna have Lew and Sidney here work out on both your melons! 80 00:06:54,544 --> 00:06:57,068 No, no. Please don't. D-D-Don't. We can explain. 81 00:06:57,112 --> 00:06:59,288 Trucking manifest sheets... That's all we had in there. 82 00:06:59,331 --> 00:07:01,638 This shipment was one of them. 83 00:07:01,682 --> 00:07:04,859 You guys spend too much time around hamburger patties. 84 00:07:04,902 --> 00:07:07,731 You think I just come in from Duluth, huh? 85 00:07:07,775 --> 00:07:11,169 You keep trucking invoices in a file cabinet not a mini-safe. 86 00:07:11,213 --> 00:07:14,434 Look. Maybe Mickey was just in there getting a spare costume. 87 00:07:14,477 --> 00:07:16,479 Maybe he wasn't into the safe. 88 00:07:16,523 --> 00:07:18,699 We just thought you should know. 89 00:07:18,742 --> 00:07:22,442 Your interest rate just doubled. Oh, come on. 90 00:07:22,485 --> 00:07:25,314 Hey, we got stiff rates for rat finks. 91 00:07:25,357 --> 00:07:28,578 You and Mr. Palm Springs here. You don't like it? 92 00:07:28,622 --> 00:07:32,234 I can always arrange for a little street surgery from the guys. 93 00:07:32,277 --> 00:07:34,845 You take your pick. 94 00:07:34,889 --> 00:07:39,110 Yeah, you got Warfel and 10 seconds. 95 00:07:39,154 --> 00:07:41,635 I'm pushin' a deadline here. Yeah, it's me. 96 00:07:41,678 --> 00:07:44,507 Hey! Hey, ya, Captain. You got it? 97 00:07:44,551 --> 00:07:48,642 Yeah. I-5 in the morning. I called the feds. 98 00:07:48,685 --> 00:07:52,123 They'll probably wait till the truck passes into Nevada. 99 00:07:52,167 --> 00:07:55,257 Hey, thanks, bunkie. I'll be at the state line with a camera. 100 00:07:55,300 --> 00:07:59,217 Great. 101 00:08:01,829 --> 00:08:05,180 This guy was sellin' pills in the student store. I couldn't believe it. 102 00:08:05,223 --> 00:08:08,052 He was sellin' it in candy bags and wrappers and things. 103 00:08:08,096 --> 00:08:12,317 Ah, Carlisle's got me on this Interstate Narcotics desk. 104 00:08:12,361 --> 00:08:14,276 Chasing trucks. Would you belive that? 105 00:08:14,319 --> 00:08:16,384 With my kill record, I oughta be droppin' a hammer... 106 00:08:16,408 --> 00:08:18,498 on the big, red mean machine. 107 00:08:18,541 --> 00:08:20,804 Instead of that... 108 00:08:20,848 --> 00:08:23,938 I'm playing squat tag with a hamburger truck. It's embarrassing. 109 00:08:23,981 --> 00:08:26,941 Damage these guys do in school to the students, it's unbelievable. 110 00:08:26,984 --> 00:08:29,117 I'd like to see all these dealers put behind bars. 111 00:08:29,160 --> 00:08:31,206 Yeah, yeah, yeah. Well, trouble is... 112 00:08:31,249 --> 00:08:33,469 just a truckload of dope doesn't mean anything. 113 00:08:33,513 --> 00:08:36,690 If we could find the factory that makes that stuff, that would be worth doin'. 114 00:08:41,085 --> 00:08:42,783 There it is! Huh? 115 00:08:46,482 --> 00:08:49,441 Come on. Here. 116 00:09:06,458 --> 00:09:08,504 The only thing I don't understand, Bill, 117 00:09:08,548 --> 00:09:10,743 is why do we have to come way out here to make the bust? 118 00:09:10,767 --> 00:09:13,857 Uh, well, we gotta let 'em get the load across state lines. 119 00:09:13,901 --> 00:09:17,513 Then it's definitely a federal bust and that's my bailiwick. 120 00:09:29,307 --> 00:09:32,484 Aha! And there it is right there. Okay, let's go get 'em. 121 00:09:32,528 --> 00:09:34,574 Yeah, let's get federal. 122 00:10:03,428 --> 00:10:06,257 You, turkey! Pull it over right there! 123 00:10:12,481 --> 00:10:16,354 - Pull over! - No way. 124 00:10:23,579 --> 00:10:26,234 Your turn. Do your business. 125 00:10:26,277 --> 00:10:28,453 Get it together. 126 00:10:34,155 --> 00:10:36,331 Just hold it steady. I'm going out. 127 00:10:36,374 --> 00:10:39,377 Oh! Be careful. Don't wreck a door on me now. Be careful! 128 00:10:49,605 --> 00:10:52,434 Way to go, Ralph! 129 00:10:59,571 --> 00:11:02,574 Okay, F.B.I. You guys are busted. Get down out of there! 130 00:11:02,618 --> 00:11:04,315 Right now! Out! 131 00:11:09,494 --> 00:11:11,627 What's goin' on here, man? Come over here. 132 00:11:11,671 --> 00:11:16,414 What'd we do? Back of the truck. Back of the truck! 133 00:11:22,638 --> 00:11:24,901 Now, open it up. I ain't got the key. 134 00:11:24,945 --> 00:11:26,990 They got it at the warehouse in Tucson. 135 00:11:27,034 --> 00:11:29,689 Oh, that's too bad. Ralph, take if off of there. 136 00:11:34,084 --> 00:11:37,000 - It's empty. - Who are you? 137 00:11:37,044 --> 00:11:39,133 I don't believe it, a bum steer. 138 00:11:39,176 --> 00:11:41,502 Well, I called the C.H.P., kid. You'd better get out of here. 139 00:11:41,526 --> 00:11:43,566 Hit the silk. I'll pick you up down the road. Right. 140 00:11:47,445 --> 00:11:49,578 I don't believe this. 141 00:12:02,591 --> 00:12:05,159 This is gonna be great, hon. I'll make a duck liver dip. 142 00:12:05,202 --> 00:12:07,552 Honey, this is a school dance. 143 00:12:07,596 --> 00:12:09,476 So? You're head of the hors d'oeuvres committee. 144 00:12:09,511 --> 00:12:11,774 Whatever happened to cookies and... punch? 145 00:12:11,818 --> 00:12:15,647 Don't worry. We'll stay inside your $20 budget. 146 00:12:15,691 --> 00:12:18,389 - Oh, no! - Oh, yeah. 147 00:12:18,433 --> 00:12:22,089 - Oh, no! - Ralph, what are you talking about? 148 00:12:24,221 --> 00:12:26,571 Oh, no. 149 00:12:26,615 --> 00:12:28,660 I'm finished. 150 00:12:34,841 --> 00:12:37,844 Burger alert! Burger alert! Come in, Capt. Bellybuster. 151 00:12:37,887 --> 00:12:40,194 Do you read me? 152 00:12:40,237 --> 00:12:43,763 Loud and clear! Hey, burger cadets, 153 00:12:43,806 --> 00:12:47,201 don't forget the opening of our new store in Tarzana. 154 00:12:47,244 --> 00:12:51,379 Come over for a belly-full of juicy, belly-busting burgers. 155 00:12:51,422 --> 00:12:54,164 See you there! Hamburger Heaven... 156 00:12:54,208 --> 00:12:57,994 And there he goes. As graceful as me in the early days. 157 00:12:58,038 --> 00:13:01,389 Maybe he has an instruction book. More likely a recipe book. 158 00:13:02,912 --> 00:13:05,262 You were right! You were right. It's right here. 159 00:13:05,306 --> 00:13:07,806 Right here in the middle of dead-center, front page. Look at that. 160 00:13:07,830 --> 00:13:10,504 I know. I've got one of my own right here. All right? It's terrible. 161 00:13:10,528 --> 00:13:13,053 Lucky your face was turned away. You can almost see your mouth. 162 00:13:13,096 --> 00:13:16,360 I know. If the guy's got this picture, he probably has more. 163 00:13:16,404 --> 00:13:18,493 Did you see the closing caption? 164 00:13:18,536 --> 00:13:20,669 "Identity of hero revealed tomorrow."G...! Boy! 165 00:13:20,712 --> 00:13:22,932 I've been thinking about this and I'm positive, 166 00:13:22,976 --> 00:13:25,084 this creep that took these pictures, you and me were set up. 167 00:13:25,108 --> 00:13:27,545 Well, I know. That's what Pam and I were talking about. 168 00:13:27,589 --> 00:13:29,634 You get a hot tip about a truck full of speed, 169 00:13:29,678 --> 00:13:31,636 we get out there, there's nothing in it. 170 00:13:31,680 --> 00:13:33,856 Warfel's probably sitting in the bushes with a camera. 171 00:13:33,900 --> 00:13:36,163 That's my scenario exactly. What are we going to do? 172 00:13:36,206 --> 00:13:39,403 We gotta stop this, Bill, before Ralph ends up bending spoons on The Merv Griffin Show. 173 00:13:39,427 --> 00:13:41,646 He'll end up more recognizable than Captain Bellybuster. 174 00:13:41,690 --> 00:13:45,607 - Captain what? - You know, the guy on the hamburger commercials. 175 00:13:45,650 --> 00:13:48,784 He flies like Ralph. He's got a suit and cape and everything. 176 00:13:48,828 --> 00:13:51,134 Yeah, you know, wires and mirrors. 177 00:13:51,178 --> 00:13:53,745 Who cares about that stuff? Give me a break. 178 00:13:53,789 --> 00:13:56,724 Boys and girls, if it ever gets out about the suit, I'm gonna tell you what happens. 179 00:13:56,748 --> 00:14:00,535 The first thing that happens is our government drops a net on the three of us. 180 00:14:00,578 --> 00:14:03,514 You, Ralph, you're gonna wind up in a steel cell someplace in deepest Arizona, 181 00:14:03,538 --> 00:14:07,020 while the eggheads from the Pentagon try to figure out what you can do with the suit. 182 00:14:07,063 --> 00:14:10,719 And since there's no answer to that, they're gonna take the suit and lock it up... 183 00:14:10,762 --> 00:14:13,113 and never let the three of us out ever. 184 00:14:13,156 --> 00:14:17,813 Because they're gonna be scared to death that the commies get their hands on this thing. 185 00:14:17,857 --> 00:14:20,729 So, the whole thing goes in the dustbin for the next 50 years, 186 00:14:20,772 --> 00:14:24,689 and we wind up packin' parachutes in a room with no windows. 187 00:14:24,733 --> 00:14:28,737 I don't believe it's that bad. It is that bad, believe it. 188 00:14:28,780 --> 00:14:31,305 Ralph's chances of makin' spoons bend onThe Griffin Show... 189 00:14:31,348 --> 00:14:34,743 are about as good as mine are of dancin' with the Russian Ballet. 190 00:14:34,786 --> 00:14:37,920 Warfel, Bruce. Warfel, okay, Daily Galaxy. Got 'em. 191 00:14:37,964 --> 00:14:41,271 Now, let's go stuff this guy and mount him over the fireplace. Come on! 192 00:14:41,315 --> 00:14:43,970 Warfel's probably a reject from a decent newspaper. 193 00:14:44,013 --> 00:14:47,887 Bill's right, you know. I'm afraid so, Ralph. 194 00:14:56,939 --> 00:14:59,333 Yeah, that's it. 195 00:15:00,421 --> 00:15:04,251 Okay, you're gonna get this Mickey guy. 196 00:15:04,294 --> 00:15:08,429 You bring 'em out here. We take him uptown and bury him in a shoe box. 197 00:15:08,472 --> 00:15:12,868 Then we bop this reporter guy, this Warfel character. 198 00:15:12,912 --> 00:15:15,131 Got me? Yes, sir. 199 00:15:15,175 --> 00:15:17,568 Okay, what are you waiting for? Let's do it. 200 00:15:45,683 --> 00:15:48,512 I've been having some trouble with the distributor. 201 00:15:48,556 --> 00:15:50,732 Hey, you're losin' your clutch, too, kiddo. 202 00:15:50,775 --> 00:15:53,175 Well, we could've taken your car, but it's always out of gas. 203 00:15:53,213 --> 00:15:55,737 Who is this Bruce Warfel, anyway? I've never heard of him. 204 00:15:55,780 --> 00:15:58,783 He's a very famous reporter, if you read those scandal sheets. 205 00:15:58,827 --> 00:16:02,004 How do you know? You don't read that garbage, do ya? 206 00:16:02,048 --> 00:16:04,441 Uh... I'm shocked with you. 207 00:16:04,485 --> 00:16:06,791 Standing on the checkout line. 208 00:16:06,835 --> 00:16:09,838 We're gonna Abscam those bums someday. I'll do it personally. 209 00:16:09,881 --> 00:16:11,666 Yeah, hello, there. Yes? 210 00:16:11,709 --> 00:16:13,973 We need to see, uh, Bruce, uh, Warfel. 211 00:16:14,016 --> 00:16:18,586 He's with the Galaxypalmist and he can't be disturbed or he'll miss his deadline. 212 00:16:18,629 --> 00:16:21,458 Oh? Oh, well, this is official government business. 213 00:16:21,502 --> 00:16:23,591 So, we're gonna disturb him anyway, aren't we? 214 00:16:23,634 --> 00:16:25,767 My exact thoughts. 215 00:16:25,810 --> 00:16:29,118 He's in Linotype, down the hall to the right.Okay. 216 00:16:29,162 --> 00:16:31,207 Thanks for the reading. 217 00:16:31,251 --> 00:16:34,994 Liz and Dick remarry, you got an extra 100. All right, kid. 218 00:16:35,037 --> 00:16:38,258 Ralph, let me do the talking. 219 00:16:38,301 --> 00:16:40,564 We're gonna spike this guy into concrete, no problem. 220 00:16:43,045 --> 00:16:45,743 Warfel? Maxwell, F.B.I. 221 00:16:47,571 --> 00:16:50,400 You're the guy. You're the two guys. 222 00:16:50,444 --> 00:16:53,273 You got big problems here, Bruce.Yeah. 223 00:16:53,316 --> 00:16:57,886 Well, look. We can't talk here. Come on. 224 00:16:57,929 --> 00:16:59,714 Say, that's quite an act you got there, kid. 225 00:16:59,757 --> 00:17:01,803 I never seen anything like it. 226 00:17:01,846 --> 00:17:05,937 Mr. Warfel, please, you cannotprint anything more about me. 227 00:17:05,981 --> 00:17:07,896 Whoa, whoa, whoa, kid, look.Please. 228 00:17:07,939 --> 00:17:10,116 Let me get to paragraph one. See, I'm a reporter. 229 00:17:10,159 --> 00:17:12,181 Now, I gotta admit, my mind was bent a little yesterday... 230 00:17:12,205 --> 00:17:16,339 because I move on a tip on drug running and there you are flying around and all. 231 00:17:16,383 --> 00:17:18,341 I went home and drank a whole bottle of scotch. 232 00:17:18,385 --> 00:17:20,667 And I almost had myself convinced I was dreaming, but then... 233 00:17:20,691 --> 00:17:25,087 Then I got my stills and I knew I had seen what I seen. 234 00:17:25,131 --> 00:17:27,089 There you are in your little red whatsit. 235 00:17:27,133 --> 00:17:29,222 So, I, uh, I run the story, 236 00:17:29,265 --> 00:17:31,528 and I put in that line about more to come tomorrow, 237 00:17:31,572 --> 00:17:36,229 hoping that it would draw you guys in and bingo! 238 00:17:38,318 --> 00:17:40,450 Now, what seems to be the problem? 239 00:17:42,887 --> 00:17:45,803 You see, Mr. Warfel, this suit is experimental. 240 00:17:45,847 --> 00:17:49,720 It's kind of a secret weapon being developed by the air force. 241 00:17:49,764 --> 00:17:53,333 Baloney, baloney. The air force is not runnin' around... 242 00:17:53,376 --> 00:17:56,988 tryin' to stop a hamburger truck with a box of reds in the back. 243 00:17:57,032 --> 00:18:01,776 I play hardball. The First Amendment of the good old Constitution is on my side. 244 00:18:01,819 --> 00:18:05,780 Now you try and muffle the press and you're gonna choke on Supreme Court writs. 245 00:18:05,823 --> 00:18:08,783 There is nothing, and I repeat, nothing you can do... 246 00:18:08,826 --> 00:18:10,872 to stop me from printing the rest of my pictures. 247 00:18:10,915 --> 00:18:16,312 Uh, Ralph, I think this gent needs a demonstration. 248 00:18:18,575 --> 00:18:20,882 Oh. 249 00:18:20,925 --> 00:18:25,060 That is oneof his parlor tricks, Bruce. 250 00:18:25,104 --> 00:18:28,803 You ought to see him atomize a high-rise or turn a flip-top like you... 251 00:18:28,846 --> 00:18:30,805 into a six-foot charcoal briquet. 252 00:18:30,848 --> 00:18:33,895 How'd you like to see that one, Bruce? We're not kiddin' here! 253 00:18:33,938 --> 00:18:37,290 All right. On the other hand, I don't have to print all the news, right? 254 00:18:37,333 --> 00:18:40,945 You've made the right decision, Bruce. You see this is bigger than all of us. 255 00:18:40,989 --> 00:18:44,166 All right, all right, look. I'm not Woodward or Bernstein. 256 00:18:44,210 --> 00:18:47,952 I got no journalistic integrity when it comes to saving mytuchus. 257 00:18:47,996 --> 00:18:51,869 All right, the First Amendment is a fool's paradise, besides. 258 00:18:51,913 --> 00:18:55,395 There was an anonymous call, it was an obvious scam, all right? 259 00:18:55,438 --> 00:18:57,962 - Right. - Good. 260 00:18:58,006 --> 00:19:00,095 Would you excuse me? I've gotta get back to work. 261 00:19:00,139 --> 00:19:02,184 Now, Bruce. Sir? 262 00:19:02,228 --> 00:19:06,057 If you turn around on this we're gonna drop on ya like a ton of buckwheat. 263 00:19:06,101 --> 00:19:08,190 No, sir, don't worry, because when this story... 264 00:19:08,234 --> 00:19:10,714 at the bottom I'm putting "3-0"... over and out. 265 00:19:10,758 --> 00:19:14,414 Finis. Punta e basta. Okay? That's the way to talk. 266 00:19:14,457 --> 00:19:16,590 I told you he was gonna be cooperative.Okay. 267 00:19:16,633 --> 00:19:19,854 I don't know, Bill. Warfel made a pretty fast U-turn. 268 00:19:19,897 --> 00:19:22,073 I think this guy's conning us, Bill. 269 00:19:22,117 --> 00:19:24,859 I don't look forward to ending up in a room with no windows. 270 00:19:24,902 --> 00:19:28,079 Ah, come on, Ralph. You torched his tape recorder and he fell apart. 271 00:19:28,123 --> 00:19:31,605 Under all the wise guy stuff, this bird is a tower of lemon Jell-O. 272 00:19:31,648 --> 00:19:34,651 No problem. Case closed. I promise. Trust me. 273 00:19:34,695 --> 00:19:37,785 Well, Agent Maxwell. 274 00:19:37,828 --> 00:19:40,918 You wanna try and explain this? 275 00:19:40,962 --> 00:19:44,095 You certainly have stirred up the dust this morning, haven't you? 276 00:19:44,139 --> 00:19:47,360 Don't strain your eyeballs, Billy. I'll give you the condensed version. 277 00:19:47,403 --> 00:19:52,974 This guy has photographs of you with some gooney-bird in red tights and a cape. 278 00:19:53,017 --> 00:19:55,150 The photo inset is on page 10. 279 00:19:55,194 --> 00:19:58,564 It's right under the story of the Kansas farmer who took a spaceship to Witch Mountain. 280 00:19:58,588 --> 00:20:01,722 "F.B.I. Attempts Cover-up of Flying Man." 281 00:20:01,765 --> 00:20:06,248 "Agent William Maxwell threatens reporter in attempted whitewash." 282 00:20:06,292 --> 00:20:09,120 "Flying man secret weapon," agent says. 283 00:20:09,164 --> 00:20:12,167 I didn't say that. Pam sai... 284 00:20:13,995 --> 00:20:18,217 Well, Bill, I think we finally got something... 285 00:20:18,260 --> 00:20:21,089 to take upstairs to the old head-basket ward. 286 00:20:23,613 --> 00:20:26,877 Well, no. Remember, I was on the, uh, 287 00:20:26,921 --> 00:20:29,097 th-th-the Interstate Narcotics desk. 288 00:20:29,140 --> 00:20:31,969 You remember where you put me? We got an anonymous call. 289 00:20:32,013 --> 00:20:35,103 Uh, I don't know who it was. It was anonymous. 290 00:20:35,146 --> 00:20:39,629 They said there was a hamburger truck full of amphetamines out on the I-5. 291 00:20:39,673 --> 00:20:41,936 So, what we... Bill. 292 00:20:41,979 --> 00:20:45,418 I'm bored already. Let me give you a little piece of advice. 293 00:20:45,461 --> 00:20:47,942 If you don't mind it. 294 00:20:47,985 --> 00:20:53,687 What I would do, Bill, is I would produce this guy in the red tights! 295 00:20:53,730 --> 00:20:56,429 - Wha... - And I would be prepared to prove... 296 00:20:56,472 --> 00:20:58,996 to the psychiatric review board that he flies... 297 00:20:59,040 --> 00:21:00,955 and lifts trucks and stuff. 298 00:21:00,998 --> 00:21:04,393 'Cause if you don't, Bill, I've got a terrible feeling... 299 00:21:04,437 --> 00:21:06,980 you're gonna find yourself in a padded room with a box of crayons. 300 00:21:07,004 --> 00:21:11,661 Well, there's a perfectly reasonable and rational explanation for all this stuff. 301 00:21:11,705 --> 00:21:16,362 Uh, obviously, maybe, I'm just a little thin on details right now, but... 302 00:21:16,405 --> 00:21:18,712 Bill, uh, are those your current cases? 303 00:21:18,755 --> 00:21:20,757 Yeah. Oh, yeah, you said you wanted to... 304 00:21:20,801 --> 00:21:24,108 Relieve you of all extra responsibilities so you could devote... 305 00:21:24,152 --> 00:21:26,328 your full time and attention... 306 00:21:26,372 --> 00:21:30,593 to finding this clown in the tights who flies. 307 00:21:30,637 --> 00:21:35,076 - Uh, that's very decent of you, sir. - Least I could do. 308 00:21:37,992 --> 00:21:42,257 Good hunting, soldier. 309 00:21:44,215 --> 00:21:46,305 You guys have anything to do? 310 00:21:48,132 --> 00:21:51,135 Well, old Bruce really did it to us this time. 311 00:21:51,179 --> 00:21:53,137 Did you read the closing caption? 312 00:21:53,181 --> 00:21:55,749 "Tomorrow Revealing Pictures of Hero." 313 00:21:55,792 --> 00:21:58,621 Carlisle's read it. The whole building has read it, I think. 314 00:21:58,665 --> 00:22:03,017 I'm up for a psychiatric review tomorrow morning. I'm hanging on a thread. 315 00:22:03,060 --> 00:22:05,062 Hang on, both of you. 316 00:22:05,106 --> 00:22:07,413 Tomorrow's paper doesn't go to press for another hour. 317 00:22:07,456 --> 00:22:11,939 - Yeah, where is your boss, Warfel? - You never give up, do you? 318 00:22:11,982 --> 00:22:15,203 - They don't pay me to give up. What about an answer? - He went down to Linotype. 319 00:22:15,246 --> 00:22:18,162 Uh, okay. Come on. 320 00:22:22,645 --> 00:22:25,213 Hold it. 321 00:22:25,256 --> 00:22:28,956 Get down! 322 00:22:44,841 --> 00:22:47,191 Davidson, what's happened? You okay? 323 00:22:47,235 --> 00:22:50,369 Honey, you all right? Yeah. Yeah, I'm not hit. I ducked and hit my head. 324 00:22:50,412 --> 00:22:52,414 That's all. Let me take a look. 325 00:22:52,458 --> 00:22:55,896 No, I must have bobbed when I should've weaved. What? 326 00:22:55,939 --> 00:23:00,770 Captain Bellybuster. 327 00:23:02,424 --> 00:23:05,427 Captain... What did he say? Captain Bellybuster. 328 00:23:05,471 --> 00:23:08,387 That's supposed to be a killer? That's what I got. 329 00:23:08,430 --> 00:23:11,172 Well, we gotta get out of here and find Captain What's-his-face. 330 00:23:11,215 --> 00:23:13,261 Let's go. Can you... Can you walk? 331 00:23:13,304 --> 00:23:16,003 I think so. Get your clothes. Right. 332 00:23:22,226 --> 00:23:24,272 Oh, brother. Get in. I'm gonna drive. 333 00:23:24,315 --> 00:23:26,100 Ralph, get rid of that cop. Do something. 334 00:23:26,143 --> 00:23:28,319 I'll meet you later.Yeah. 335 00:23:28,363 --> 00:23:30,583 Go on. I'll catch up. 336 00:23:37,677 --> 00:23:40,636 - Hold it right there. Don't move. - Look! 337 00:23:50,690 --> 00:23:52,996 There he is, Bill. Look at him. I can't look at him. 338 00:23:53,040 --> 00:23:55,259 I'm drivin'. What's he doin'? 339 00:24:04,312 --> 00:24:06,575 I don't know. Looks like he's trying something new. 340 00:24:06,619 --> 00:24:10,753 Oh, that's always disaster. What is he doing? 341 00:24:10,797 --> 00:24:13,495 Just like O.J. Simpson. 342 00:24:13,539 --> 00:24:16,280 Ha! That's fine. You can be real funny, 343 00:24:16,324 --> 00:24:19,153 but, uh, those guys saw us... they all did. 344 00:24:19,196 --> 00:24:23,853 We're gonna be tied to that guy's murder. I'm tellin' ya. 345 00:24:32,775 --> 00:24:35,561 We want Captain Bellybuster! 346 00:24:35,604 --> 00:24:41,175 We want Captain Bellybuster! We want Captain Bellybuster! 347 00:24:41,218 --> 00:24:43,917 We want Captain Bellybuster! 348 00:24:43,960 --> 00:24:46,920 Well, you said he was gonna show. 349 00:24:46,963 --> 00:24:50,489 You know, Herb, I hate to be taken for some kind of scungili. 350 00:24:50,532 --> 00:24:52,969 I'm tellin' you, Mr. Donato. I really thought he would. 351 00:24:53,013 --> 00:24:56,669 You don't know this guy like I do. He really lives for these kids. 352 00:24:56,712 --> 00:24:59,410 Even if his life depended on it? 353 00:24:59,454 --> 00:25:01,848 Hooray! Here he is! 354 00:25:04,241 --> 00:25:06,243 Bellybuster! 355 00:25:06,287 --> 00:25:09,551 Did I hear someone summon Captain Bellybuster? 356 00:25:09,595 --> 00:25:13,207 You bet, kids. 357 00:25:13,250 --> 00:25:15,383 Okay, who wants their picture taken... 358 00:25:15,426 --> 00:25:17,646 with Captain Bellybuster? 359 00:25:17,690 --> 00:25:21,258 I'd have never believed it. The guy's dumber than he looks. 360 00:25:22,956 --> 00:25:25,306 Smile. 361 00:25:27,961 --> 00:25:30,833 I don't believe this. I cannot believe this is happening to me. 362 00:25:30,877 --> 00:25:33,706 I mean, the secretary is gonna put me together with my shield. 363 00:25:33,749 --> 00:25:36,273 Now, we got a motorcycle cop who can put me together with... 364 00:25:36,317 --> 00:25:38,841 a looney tune in red jammies and a cape. 365 00:25:38,885 --> 00:25:40,843 Running away from the scene of the crime. 366 00:25:40,887 --> 00:25:43,324 We're looking down the barrel of a murder rap here, kids. 367 00:25:43,367 --> 00:25:45,544 Honey, you want a doctor to look at that? Oh, no, hon. 368 00:25:45,587 --> 00:25:48,895 It's just a little bump. Besides, I'd hate to have to explain to a doctor... 369 00:25:48,938 --> 00:25:51,351 how I bumped my head ducking a bullet at the scene of a murder. 370 00:25:51,375 --> 00:25:53,508 Which we're probably now wanted for, by the way. 371 00:25:53,552 --> 00:25:56,293 You know, Warfel had plenty of time to get that article in. 372 00:25:56,337 --> 00:26:00,820 There's probably a full-faced shot of me in tomorrow's issue. 373 00:26:00,863 --> 00:26:04,388 On top of everything else, the only clue we got to this mess is another lunatic... 374 00:26:04,432 --> 00:26:06,565 in red jammies and a cape. 375 00:26:06,608 --> 00:26:08,610 Well, I didn't mean that the way it sounded, Ralph. 376 00:26:08,654 --> 00:26:10,699 Thanks. Thanks. Just a slip of the tongue. 377 00:26:10,743 --> 00:26:14,964 - Where is this grand opening you're talking about? - I don't know, near Reseda. 378 00:26:15,008 --> 00:26:19,665 What would Captain Bellybuster have to do with some phony narcotics bust? 379 00:26:19,708 --> 00:26:23,320 I don't know. Maybe it's Burger Heaven's new offering of the week. 380 00:26:23,364 --> 00:26:27,281 A special: Buy a Bellybuster and get a bag of dope... 381 00:26:27,324 --> 00:26:30,240 in your party pack... the ultimate in junk food. 382 00:26:30,284 --> 00:26:32,982 You know, actually, Burger Heaven is not too bad. 383 00:26:33,026 --> 00:26:36,159 They serve their hamburgers on whole wheat buns with alfalfa sprouts. 384 00:26:36,203 --> 00:26:38,335 The Bellybuster is tremendous. Have you had it? 385 00:26:38,379 --> 00:26:40,816 Oh, I can't handle the big ones. I go for the Tummy Tingler. 386 00:26:40,860 --> 00:26:42,992 That's a good one. You ever try that, Bill? 387 00:26:43,036 --> 00:26:45,386 It is definitely the first order of business... 388 00:26:45,429 --> 00:26:47,349 as soon as we can solve this murder rap business. 389 00:26:50,478 --> 00:26:52,611 There he is, Captain Bellybuster. 390 00:26:52,654 --> 00:26:57,006 ...Captain Bellybuster hold you. There we go. Okay, Dad. 391 00:26:57,050 --> 00:27:00,096 Oh, boy, one of those guys. 392 00:27:00,140 --> 00:27:03,796 Okay, well, let's wait till he gets done with the kids. 393 00:27:03,839 --> 00:27:08,452 All right, kids. I just got a burger alert from Glendale. 394 00:27:08,496 --> 00:27:10,672 Let's hear it. 395 00:27:10,716 --> 00:27:14,458 Go get him. 396 00:27:18,332 --> 00:27:21,161 Well, that means I've gotta lift off. 397 00:27:21,204 --> 00:27:26,427 But don't forget, kids, a burger alert from Glendale means that I'll be back soon. 398 00:27:26,470 --> 00:27:28,429 And while I'm gone, I want you to all... 399 00:27:28,472 --> 00:27:31,780 to obey your parents and your teachers. 400 00:27:31,824 --> 00:27:35,871 Say, "please" and "thank you," and eat nutritiously, 401 00:27:35,915 --> 00:27:39,179 then, one day, you'll grow up to be like who? 402 00:27:39,222 --> 00:27:43,096 Captain Bellybuster! You bet. 403 00:27:45,402 --> 00:27:48,841 If you guys are interested in what the jolly captain has to say, you'd better move. 404 00:27:50,016 --> 00:27:52,758 Hey! I have to go to Glendale! 405 00:27:52,801 --> 00:27:55,064 Wait a minute. Look at that. 406 00:27:55,108 --> 00:27:56,936 What do you guys want? 407 00:27:59,242 --> 00:28:01,418 I don't need a limo. I've got my car in the back. 408 00:28:06,597 --> 00:28:09,470 Ralph! 409 00:28:09,513 --> 00:28:12,647 Ralph! You'd better hit the silk as quick as you can. 410 00:28:12,691 --> 00:28:14,823 I'm gonna follow with the counselor. All right. 411 00:28:14,867 --> 00:28:17,521 Hey, you're not... Captain Bellybuster! 412 00:28:17,565 --> 00:28:20,611 You're right, I'm not Captain Bellybuster. I'm Tummy Tingler. 413 00:28:20,655 --> 00:28:22,439 You'll be seeing me a lot in his commercials. 414 00:28:22,483 --> 00:28:24,833 - I've gotta go. - I got a burger alert. 415 00:28:30,012 --> 00:28:32,623 What are you gonna do to me? Shut up. 416 00:28:33,799 --> 00:28:36,323 Go through the park and head for the docks. 417 00:28:39,935 --> 00:28:42,721 Where did you get this thing, in a box of cornflakes? 418 00:28:42,764 --> 00:28:44,766 We're never gonna catch those guys. 419 00:28:46,725 --> 00:28:49,205 There's Ralph. It looks like he's headed towards the park. 420 00:28:49,249 --> 00:28:51,338 Yeah. Yeah. 421 00:29:27,940 --> 00:29:30,203 I'll get him! 422 00:29:32,640 --> 00:29:37,340 Stay here, Davidson. Why not? 423 00:29:53,008 --> 00:29:55,619 No! Please! 424 00:29:55,663 --> 00:29:58,023 Don't worry, I'm not gonna hurt you. I'm not gonna hurt you. 425 00:30:01,364 --> 00:30:03,976 Oh, hey, who are you? 426 00:30:04,019 --> 00:30:06,152 I'm not one of those guys who grabbed you. 427 00:30:06,195 --> 00:30:09,982 I can't see to good without my glasses. Come on. Let's go find them. 428 00:30:10,025 --> 00:30:12,723 Over here. Watch the curb. 429 00:30:15,204 --> 00:30:18,077 Oh, no. 430 00:30:21,994 --> 00:30:24,213 Bill, are you all right? 431 00:30:24,257 --> 00:30:27,303 Just a little cardiac seizure. No problem. 432 00:30:27,347 --> 00:30:30,567 How can a guy that looks like he's smuggling basketballs... 433 00:30:30,611 --> 00:30:32,613 run so fast? 434 00:30:32,656 --> 00:30:34,571 Who are you? He's a friend. Maxwell, 435 00:30:36,747 --> 00:30:38,880 Oh, thank God. 436 00:30:38,924 --> 00:30:40,969 Hey, listen. Have I got a lot to tell you. 437 00:30:41,013 --> 00:30:44,973 Yeah? Like why you phoned in a phony drug shipment. 438 00:30:45,017 --> 00:30:47,758 Phony drug shipment? Didn't you stop the truck on I-5? 439 00:30:47,802 --> 00:30:50,849 Yeah, we stopped it. All we got was an empty truck... 440 00:30:50,892 --> 00:30:53,112 and a near-miss case of pneumonia. 441 00:30:53,155 --> 00:30:55,917 Hey, Bill, take it easy on the guy, all right? He's scared and confused. 442 00:30:55,941 --> 00:30:58,073 Oh, hey, they must've changed the schedule... 443 00:30:58,117 --> 00:31:00,249 when they found out I knew about the run. 444 00:31:00,293 --> 00:31:02,599 That's why they tried to kill me. Here's your glasses. 445 00:31:02,643 --> 00:31:05,013 Well, in case everybody's forgotten, we're still in white water here. 446 00:31:05,037 --> 00:31:07,909 Let's find the counselor before we get spotted by a cop. Come on. 447 00:31:07,953 --> 00:31:10,303 Why the outfit? 448 00:31:10,346 --> 00:31:14,785 You're not the local guy they were gonna send in in case I didn't show up? 449 00:31:14,829 --> 00:31:17,397 No, I'm not your replacement. Oh, I hope not, 450 00:31:17,440 --> 00:31:20,530 because that's not an official Captain Bellybuster uniform. 451 00:31:20,574 --> 00:31:24,099 I mean, the kids would know right off that's not the real thing. 452 00:31:24,143 --> 00:31:26,319 Why the getup? Well, that's some question... 453 00:31:26,362 --> 00:31:28,408 comin' from a guy that's got himself all done up... 454 00:31:28,451 --> 00:31:30,497 like the head doorman at the funny farm. 455 00:31:30,540 --> 00:31:32,586 No offense, Ralph.Thanks. 456 00:31:32,629 --> 00:31:34,718 I use my uniform to sell nourishing hamburgers. 457 00:31:34,762 --> 00:31:37,460 How about you? Oh, it's, uh... 458 00:31:37,504 --> 00:31:40,768 It's a really long story.Oh. 459 00:31:40,811 --> 00:31:42,596 Let me have a look. 460 00:31:42,639 --> 00:31:45,338 Oh, believe me, it's really not a problem. 461 00:31:45,381 --> 00:31:47,731 Something to do with the distributor, that's all. 462 00:31:47,775 --> 00:31:51,518 That should be fine. I don't wanna be a bother. 463 00:31:51,561 --> 00:31:54,782 Just lookin' to help a pretty lady in distress. 464 00:31:54,825 --> 00:31:56,740 Hey, uh, how about tomorrow night? 465 00:31:56,784 --> 00:31:58,829 I can get my partner to cover for me. 466 00:31:58,873 --> 00:32:00,919 Well, I'm busy tomorrow night too. 467 00:32:00,962 --> 00:32:03,723 My boyfriend just went to get some help. He should be back any minute. 468 00:32:05,053 --> 00:32:07,534 Oh, great. 469 00:32:07,577 --> 00:32:10,885 What's happening here, the Macy's Day Parade? 470 00:32:10,929 --> 00:32:13,105 Well, well, look at what we got here. 471 00:32:13,148 --> 00:32:15,672 Huey, Dewey, and Louie. 472 00:32:15,716 --> 00:32:18,153 I bet your friends think you dress weird. Me? 473 00:32:18,197 --> 00:32:20,286 Okay, you two, let's see your I.D.'s. 474 00:32:20,329 --> 00:32:22,853 Uh, Officer, this is easily explained. 475 00:32:22,897 --> 00:32:26,901 - No, it's not. - Your two I.D.'s. Come on. 476 00:32:26,945 --> 00:32:29,904 - Wait a minute. I know you. - Me? 477 00:32:29,948 --> 00:32:32,646 No, not you, him. 478 00:32:32,689 --> 00:32:35,083 You're Captain Bellybuster. That's right. 479 00:32:35,127 --> 00:32:38,652 - He sure is. - Gee, my kids are crazy about you. 480 00:32:38,695 --> 00:32:43,004 The way you fly down and crash through that wall with them burgers in your hands. 481 00:32:43,048 --> 00:32:46,877 Hey, uh, could I get your autograph for my kids? 482 00:32:46,921 --> 00:32:51,317 Why sure. What are their names? Jennifer and Ryan. 483 00:32:51,360 --> 00:32:53,841 You know, they wake me up every Saturday morning... 484 00:32:53,884 --> 00:32:56,124 so we can go down and get some of them Breakfast Busters. 485 00:32:58,063 --> 00:33:01,718 And it's good for them too... Packed with nutritional value. 486 00:33:01,762 --> 00:33:06,810 - Hey, how 'bout yours? - Me? Um... 487 00:33:06,854 --> 00:33:08,963 Uh, well, Captain, I guess we better be going along... 488 00:33:08,987 --> 00:33:11,076 if we're gonna hit the rest of those locations. 489 00:33:11,119 --> 00:33:13,208 We're scouting locations for his new commercials. 490 00:33:13,252 --> 00:33:16,037 Burger alert! 491 00:33:16,081 --> 00:33:18,866 Burger alert. Gotta go. Bye. 492 00:33:18,909 --> 00:33:22,391 Let's go. Okay, Captain, after you. 493 00:33:22,435 --> 00:33:25,829 Right in there. Okay, thank you, Officer. 494 00:33:35,187 --> 00:33:37,537 Captain Bellybuster. 495 00:33:37,580 --> 00:33:40,192 It's Mickey, Mickey Michaelson... 496 00:33:40,235 --> 00:33:42,368 At least that's what my name is now. 497 00:33:42,411 --> 00:33:46,024 It used to be Michael Negausky, that's before I changed it and went into show business... 498 00:33:46,067 --> 00:33:48,069 and started doing the Playhouse... 499 00:33:48,113 --> 00:33:50,158 Playhouse? Playhouse 90? 500 00:33:50,202 --> 00:33:53,422 No, Mickey's Magic Playhouse. 501 00:33:53,466 --> 00:33:56,904 Mickey's Magic Playhouse. Yes, I remember seeing that quite a few times. 502 00:33:56,947 --> 00:33:58,906 It had Billy Bluejeans on it and that bird... 503 00:33:58,949 --> 00:34:01,082 and that rabbit that used to stump you at spelling. 504 00:34:01,126 --> 00:34:03,432 - Right, Cock Robin. - That's right. 505 00:34:03,476 --> 00:34:05,608 And Miss Spelling and the Alphabet. 506 00:34:05,652 --> 00:34:07,871 Bill, I used to watch his show all the time. 507 00:34:07,915 --> 00:34:11,484 It was on in the morning around 5:30. I used to watch before I took a shower. 508 00:34:11,527 --> 00:34:16,097 Yeah, that's what killed us in most of the major markets. We were on too early. 509 00:34:16,141 --> 00:34:19,883 Then they put on those early morning cartoons... Qwazy Qwackenbush. 510 00:34:19,927 --> 00:34:21,885 He's the one who knocked us off in Philly. 511 00:34:21,929 --> 00:34:26,194 Cap, could we talk about who knocked off Bruce Warfel? 512 00:34:26,238 --> 00:34:28,849 I'm really kind of more into that, actually. 513 00:34:28,892 --> 00:34:32,461 Oh, it must have been Donato Friago, the loan shark. 514 00:34:32,505 --> 00:34:37,597 He was the silent partner with Cal Freeman and Herb Teil of the Hamburger Heaven chain. 515 00:34:37,640 --> 00:34:40,078 Only his interests were using the interstate shipments... 516 00:34:40,121 --> 00:34:43,342 of Hamburger Heaven's supplies to move his drugs... that's what I found out. 517 00:34:43,385 --> 00:34:45,648 Well, you must've tipped your mitt, Mickey, 518 00:34:45,692 --> 00:34:48,390 because, obviously, they canceled the shipment, 519 00:34:48,434 --> 00:34:50,827 waited to see if we were gonna bust 'em... we tried... 520 00:34:50,871 --> 00:34:53,091 And then they knew it was you that fingered them. 521 00:34:53,134 --> 00:34:57,791 - That's when they decided to deep-fry your hamburgers. - Yeah, poor Mr. Warfel. 522 00:34:57,834 --> 00:34:59,793 I can't believe they did that to him. 523 00:34:59,836 --> 00:35:02,143 - Burger alert! Burger alert! - Uh-huh. 524 00:35:02,187 --> 00:35:04,145 Oh, boy. Did any cops spot you? 525 00:35:04,189 --> 00:35:06,321 Yeah. Coppers had me cornered. 526 00:35:06,365 --> 00:35:08,541 But I popped one and took it on the lam. 527 00:35:08,584 --> 00:35:10,717 Then I parked a few blocks away and I walked. 528 00:35:10,760 --> 00:35:14,851 Oh, that's wonderful. Keep the jokes comin'. Just enjoy yourself. 529 00:35:14,895 --> 00:35:18,899 They've got my name and my number and Ralph is a known associate. 530 00:35:18,942 --> 00:35:20,964 I mean, I'm startin' to sound like John Dillinger here. 531 00:35:20,988 --> 00:35:23,208 Bill, take it easy on the girl, all right? 532 00:35:23,251 --> 00:35:25,534 They think you're to smart to be dumb enough to come over here. 533 00:35:25,558 --> 00:35:28,213 - Thanks, Ralph... I think. - Here's your Bellybuster, Captain. 534 00:35:28,256 --> 00:35:30,345 Mickey, Miss Davidson. Thank you. 535 00:35:30,389 --> 00:35:34,915 I always get hungry when I get nervous, and I can't eat anything but Hamburger Heaven. 536 00:35:34,958 --> 00:35:38,919 Not since I put on the Captain Bellybuster outfit. 537 00:35:38,962 --> 00:35:41,051 Mmm! These are good! 538 00:35:41,095 --> 00:35:43,880 Mm. And fortified with all the vitamins... 539 00:35:43,924 --> 00:35:46,448 that make up your daily requirement. 540 00:35:46,492 --> 00:35:50,887 Gang, I think we're slippin' a little bit out of our assigned airspace here. 541 00:35:50,931 --> 00:35:53,281 We're tryin' to figure out how to get out of this mess. 542 00:35:53,325 --> 00:35:56,328 Well, the first thing we gotta do, is we gotta find Mickey some clothes. 543 00:35:56,371 --> 00:35:59,350 Believe me, I know what it feels like to be running around like Radar Man from Mars. 544 00:35:59,374 --> 00:36:01,724 I don't understand. What do you mean? 545 00:36:01,768 --> 00:36:05,598 - Well, don't you feel dumb? - Dumb? 546 00:36:05,641 --> 00:36:09,079 - Why should I feel dumb? - Come on. You're running around in red leotards... 547 00:36:09,123 --> 00:36:11,169 with a beef patty on your chest. 548 00:36:11,212 --> 00:36:14,824 I mean, you gotta feel silly and don't you feel embarrassed when people look at ya? 549 00:36:16,696 --> 00:36:19,829 Hey, lookit, pal. People look up to me... I mean, the kids. 550 00:36:19,873 --> 00:36:22,005 What do they have but me? 551 00:36:22,049 --> 00:36:24,356 The adults too. They come to me also... 552 00:36:24,399 --> 00:36:26,923 because I guess I kind of remind them of a superhero... 553 00:36:26,967 --> 00:36:30,927 of yesterday when the world was a simpler place. 554 00:36:30,971 --> 00:36:33,539 Good and bad and right and wrong were just as plain... 555 00:36:33,582 --> 00:36:36,019 As the patty melt on your chest. 556 00:36:36,063 --> 00:36:39,284 That's very funny. Hey, you can laugh if you want to, 557 00:36:39,327 --> 00:36:42,809 but I'm very proud to wear this uniform. 558 00:36:44,202 --> 00:36:47,292 Now, look. We've gotta do something about our situation. 559 00:36:47,335 --> 00:36:49,946 I mean, the police are bound to show up here sooner or later. 560 00:36:49,990 --> 00:36:53,123 Yeah, the counselor's right. We gotta find a speed factory... 561 00:36:53,167 --> 00:36:57,563 Wherever that is... and nail this Donato for killing Warfel. 562 00:36:57,606 --> 00:37:00,305 Hey, wait a minute. How you gonna do that? 563 00:37:00,348 --> 00:37:03,612 Where'd you say you found the manifest for the shipping routes? 564 00:37:03,656 --> 00:37:07,312 Oh, in the main offices of Hamburger Heaven in Century City. 565 00:37:07,355 --> 00:37:11,011 Hey, they cleaned those out a long time ago, as soon as they found out that I knew. 566 00:37:11,054 --> 00:37:14,101 Mickey, I'd like to thank you very much for your help. 567 00:37:14,144 --> 00:37:16,103 No, thank you. 568 00:37:16,146 --> 00:37:19,976 I'd hate the captain's name to get mixed up in a drug scandal. 569 00:37:20,020 --> 00:37:23,937 It would be terrible if I couldn't wear this uniform out in public... 570 00:37:23,980 --> 00:37:26,200 with pride. 571 00:37:39,474 --> 00:37:42,085 - It's locked. - I don't have the key. Ralph. 572 00:37:48,135 --> 00:37:51,269 How did he do that? The power of positive thinking. 573 00:37:53,140 --> 00:37:55,316 Well, looks like somebody left here in a hurry. 574 00:37:55,360 --> 00:37:58,319 Yeah, Donato Friago, housecleaning. 575 00:38:01,061 --> 00:38:03,324 Oh! 576 00:38:06,458 --> 00:38:08,721 Bill, I got something here. 577 00:38:08,764 --> 00:38:13,160 Seems they're packing drugs in Hamburger Heaven frozen patty containers. 578 00:38:13,203 --> 00:38:17,077 - Where? Where is it? - Warehouse or factory or something. Mickey! 579 00:38:17,120 --> 00:38:19,297 Does Hamburger Heaven have any warehouses in L.A.? 580 00:38:19,340 --> 00:38:21,342 I don't know. 581 00:38:21,386 --> 00:38:23,997 Well, how many Hamburger Heaven warehouses can there be in L.A.? 582 00:38:25,215 --> 00:38:27,479 Try "H.H." Run 'em all. They gotta be there. 583 00:38:27,522 --> 00:38:31,221 I'm gonna get us a cab. We need some wheels we can depend on. 584 00:38:32,310 --> 00:38:34,616 Mickey, how ya doin'? 585 00:38:34,660 --> 00:38:39,229 Okay. Just saying good-bye to Captain Bellybuster. 586 00:38:39,273 --> 00:38:43,016 You know, it was easier to say good-bye to Billy Bluejeans. 587 00:38:43,059 --> 00:38:46,193 Why good-bye? Are you kidding? 588 00:38:46,236 --> 00:38:48,717 This is the end of Hamburger Heaven. 589 00:38:48,761 --> 00:38:51,067 So, it's the end of Captain Bellybuster. 590 00:38:51,111 --> 00:38:53,243 Well, it doesn't have to be the end. 591 00:38:53,287 --> 00:38:56,377 So goes Hamburger Heaven, so goes the captain. 592 00:38:56,421 --> 00:38:58,640 The captain was Hamburger Heaven. 593 00:38:58,684 --> 00:39:01,469 Mickey, listen. You are Captain Bellybuster. 594 00:39:01,513 --> 00:39:04,603 Now, as long as you're around, Captain Bellybuster's around. 595 00:39:04,646 --> 00:39:07,127 You know, not just anybody can fill that suit. 596 00:39:09,651 --> 00:39:13,568 I guess you got a point. 597 00:39:13,612 --> 00:39:18,268 - Here it is. 11241 Sherman Way. - Okay. That's it. 598 00:39:18,312 --> 00:39:21,054 Cab should be out front. Come on, honey. 599 00:39:40,073 --> 00:39:43,076 C-Captain Bellybuster's in my cab! 600 00:39:43,119 --> 00:39:45,121 You kill me! Whenever I see you... 601 00:39:45,165 --> 00:39:48,777 flying around with those hamburger's in your hand, I just love it! 602 00:39:48,821 --> 00:39:51,650 Thank you. 603 00:39:51,693 --> 00:39:55,088 Uh, hello? 604 00:39:55,131 --> 00:39:59,222 11241 Sherman Way. 605 00:39:59,266 --> 00:40:01,747 And can we kill the laugh track? Yeah. The guys... 606 00:40:01,790 --> 00:40:04,358 at the garage are gonna kill me when they find out... 607 00:40:04,402 --> 00:40:07,230 that I had Captain Bellybuster in my cab! 608 00:40:07,274 --> 00:40:10,843 - Uh, we're in kind of a rush. - Yeah. Yeah. 609 00:40:10,886 --> 00:40:13,541 We're on burger alert. 610 00:40:21,549 --> 00:40:25,074 Okay, Ralph, that's it. Ralph, you on the inside. 611 00:40:25,118 --> 00:40:29,818 Counselor, you take Captain Bellybuster and the merry Mouseketeer, 612 00:40:29,862 --> 00:40:32,125 call Carlisle and get some backup. 613 00:40:32,168 --> 00:40:34,301 Hey, I don't understand. Where are you goin'? 614 00:40:34,344 --> 00:40:37,609 Uh, well, we're just gonna wing it. Wing it? 615 00:40:37,652 --> 00:40:39,959 Yeah. Hey, listen. I should go with you. 616 00:40:40,002 --> 00:40:42,067 I really should. We're just gonna keep and eye on them... 617 00:40:42,091 --> 00:40:44,156 until you and Pam come back with some backup, that's all. 618 00:40:44,180 --> 00:40:46,226 Yeah. Yeah, but, really. 619 00:40:46,269 --> 00:40:49,403 Mickey, please, this is the best thing. 620 00:40:49,447 --> 00:40:51,927 Would you mind taking us... To the telephone. Yeah. 621 00:40:51,971 --> 00:40:54,103 Doesn't he just kill ya? 622 00:40:54,147 --> 00:40:56,932 Well, uh, you get used to it. 623 00:40:56,976 --> 00:40:59,761 - Stop the cab! - Mickey, what are you doing? 624 00:40:59,805 --> 00:41:02,764 I gotta go help them. This is all my fault. 625 00:41:02,808 --> 00:41:05,158 Bruce getting killed, getting you guys in trouble. 626 00:41:05,201 --> 00:41:07,334 I gotta get you out. 627 00:41:07,377 --> 00:41:10,729 I know this is gonna come out kind of dumb, but... 628 00:41:10,772 --> 00:41:13,732 this is a job for Captain Bellybuster! 629 00:41:24,569 --> 00:41:26,614 You two make me laugh. 630 00:41:26,658 --> 00:41:28,790 I mean, what's this world comin' to? 631 00:41:28,834 --> 00:41:30,923 You come to me. You tell me you need some dough... 632 00:41:30,966 --> 00:41:33,055 to open up a fast-food chain. 633 00:41:33,099 --> 00:41:36,624 Yeah, okay, throw that on the truck. Didn't I give you the dough? 634 00:41:36,668 --> 00:41:40,585 Didn't I? Didn't I? Yeah, sure you did. And we appreciate it. 635 00:41:40,628 --> 00:41:43,283 With this you appreciate it? Keepin' records on me... 636 00:41:43,326 --> 00:41:46,808 so some goofball in stretch underwear can wipe me out? 637 00:41:46,852 --> 00:41:49,332 We gotta pack up and get out of here... 638 00:41:49,376 --> 00:41:51,683 and find another place to operate out of. 639 00:41:51,726 --> 00:41:55,077 How am I supposed to make up for my losses? 640 00:41:55,121 --> 00:41:57,839 We offered to make good on the money. We got the 100 G's you loaned us. 641 00:41:57,863 --> 00:42:00,953 We'll give it to ya. Ah! Angina, ya give me. 642 00:42:00,996 --> 00:42:03,912 Look, Don. It was a stupid mistake. 643 00:42:03,956 --> 00:42:06,785 You don't know how stupid. Hey, Donnie. 644 00:42:06,828 --> 00:42:09,439 Now, wait. Herb, talk to him. 645 00:42:09,483 --> 00:42:12,791 Fertilize an orange grove with 'em. Yes, sir. 646 00:42:12,834 --> 00:42:16,229 You guys are busted. Freeze! 647 00:42:16,272 --> 00:42:19,493 You heard him. Do as he says. 648 00:42:19,537 --> 00:42:22,104 Mickey, get out of the road! 649 00:43:07,323 --> 00:43:10,196 Okay, Friago, out! 650 00:43:27,169 --> 00:43:30,172 Up, baby, both of you! You want another one? 651 00:43:32,522 --> 00:43:35,961 Mickey! Mickey, you all right? 652 00:43:36,004 --> 00:43:38,006 Mickey! Mickey, talk to us. 653 00:43:39,791 --> 00:43:44,970 Captain Bellybuster's on burger alert. 654 00:43:54,501 --> 00:43:56,938 Burger alert! Burger alert! 655 00:43:56,982 --> 00:43:59,419 Come in, Captain Bellybuster. Do you read me? 656 00:43:59,462 --> 00:44:01,508 Now, uh, let me see if I've got this straight. 657 00:44:01,551 --> 00:44:04,946 This is the flying man that was in the picture in the paper with you? 658 00:44:04,990 --> 00:44:07,253 Yes, sir. It's all right here in my report. 659 00:44:07,296 --> 00:44:09,690 Yeah, Mickey Michaelson, 660 00:44:09,734 --> 00:44:12,475 Captain Bellybuster! 661 00:44:12,519 --> 00:44:15,565 Boy, oh, boy. A lot of people say one of the funniest guys on TV. 662 00:44:15,609 --> 00:44:17,655 My inside man at Hamburger Heaven... 663 00:44:17,698 --> 00:44:20,570 helped me bust their whole drug smuggling operation. 664 00:44:20,614 --> 00:44:23,356 Your kids probably love this guy, sir. 665 00:44:23,399 --> 00:44:25,401 He's been working with you right along? 666 00:44:25,445 --> 00:44:28,274 Yes, sir, and I'm sorry about before. 667 00:44:28,317 --> 00:44:33,148 I couldn't explain about Mickey being Captain Bellybuster. He had to remain anonymous. 668 00:44:33,192 --> 00:44:35,542 He was afraid for his life, because, well, uh, 669 00:44:35,585 --> 00:44:39,459 after Donato wiped out Bruce Warfel... 670 00:44:39,502 --> 00:44:43,855 Bruce Warfel, that's the publisher who put the article in the newspaper... 671 00:44:43,898 --> 00:44:48,337 so that I could flush out Donato and his whole speed factory. 672 00:44:49,425 --> 00:44:51,732 That's terrific, Billy.Yeah. 673 00:44:51,776 --> 00:44:55,431 I hate it. Makes all the sense in the world. Answers every question. 674 00:44:55,475 --> 00:44:58,173 Yes, it does, sir, doesn't it? 675 00:44:58,217 --> 00:45:00,262 Yes, I'm sorry, sir. 676 00:45:00,306 --> 00:45:04,702 Bill, I was really afraid you were going for the deep six on this one. 677 00:45:04,745 --> 00:45:06,834 Me too. What? 678 00:45:06,878 --> 00:45:09,184 What'd you say? 679 00:45:09,228 --> 00:45:11,534 I said, "Me too." 680 00:45:11,578 --> 00:45:14,973 Well, anyway, what the heck. Another day, another big bust. 681 00:45:15,016 --> 00:45:18,628 Another big, big diamond in the Maxwell package, right, sir? 682 00:45:20,108 --> 00:45:22,632 - Right? - Right. 683 00:45:22,676 --> 00:45:26,593 Gee, it's so nice to be able to put you in a good mood... 684 00:45:26,636 --> 00:45:28,813 at this time of the morning, sir. 685 00:45:28,856 --> 00:45:31,380 And I'm gonna try to get you Mickey's autograph. 686 00:45:32,599 --> 00:45:34,819 For your kids. 687 00:45:34,862 --> 00:45:37,909 I can't guarantee anything, but I'm gonna try. 688 00:45:45,612 --> 00:45:48,833 I can tell by that happy face... 689 00:45:48,876 --> 00:45:51,574 that Carlisle has bought the Captain Bellybuster story. 690 00:45:51,618 --> 00:45:54,012 Well, you just have to know what you're doin', that's all. 691 00:45:54,055 --> 00:45:57,102 I needed, uh, a guy with the funny suit... 692 00:45:57,145 --> 00:45:59,539 and the funny cape and the funny little booties. 693 00:45:59,582 --> 00:46:02,455 That's Captain Bellybuster It was a great idea. 694 00:46:02,498 --> 00:46:06,198 I was sensational. Carlisle bought it hook, line and sinker. 695 00:46:06,241 --> 00:46:08,330 You take good advice, Bill. Huh? 696 00:46:08,374 --> 00:46:10,506 Oh, uh, yeah. 697 00:46:10,550 --> 00:46:13,335 Okay, yeah, well, thanks, counselor. It was a good idea. 698 00:46:13,379 --> 00:46:15,468 Ralph, do you mind? I work here.Sorry. 699 00:46:16,556 --> 00:46:18,819 Anyway, it all went down real smooth. 700 00:46:18,863 --> 00:46:20,908 Yeah, except for Mickey. 701 00:46:20,952 --> 00:46:23,408 I guess now that Burger Heaven's shutting down, he's out of work. 702 00:46:23,432 --> 00:46:25,870 Nope. Take a look at this. 703 00:46:28,133 --> 00:46:32,485 - Wow! Look at that. He's actually a hero. - What? What? Let me see. 704 00:46:32,528 --> 00:46:37,185 He's had a couple of offers from some other fast-food chains to be their mascot. 705 00:46:37,229 --> 00:46:39,816 There's a deli in Santa Monica where he can be the new Scarlet Pumpernickel. 706 00:46:39,840 --> 00:46:42,800 There's some places back east where he can be the new Burger Meister. 707 00:46:42,843 --> 00:46:45,628 Oh, my name isn't mentioned in here once. 708 00:46:45,672 --> 00:46:48,501 You've gotten enough press from this particular paper. 709 00:46:48,544 --> 00:46:50,546 Wanna hear the best part of all? 710 00:46:50,590 --> 00:46:52,766 He asked me to be his new partner. 711 00:46:52,810 --> 00:46:55,987 Oh, Ralph. Give me a break. What do you know about hawking onion patty melts? 712 00:46:56,030 --> 00:46:59,294 He said I was the best partner he's ever had since Billy Bluejeans. 713 00:46:59,338 --> 00:47:02,732 Yeah, but isn't that the guy that went bananas on camera? They had to put him away. 714 00:47:02,776 --> 00:47:05,736 He had some emotional problems, but he used to run around on stage going... 715 00:47:09,696 --> 00:47:11,567 I liked him. 716 00:47:11,617 --> 00:47:16,167 Repair and Synchronization by Easy Subtitles Synchronizer 1.0.0.0 61495

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