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1
00:00:04,072 --> 00:00:05,539
Okay,
here's your food.
2
00:00:06,440 --> 00:00:08,309
Why is Becky
bringing you food?
3
00:00:08,342 --> 00:00:10,878
Darlene's ex-boyfriend's
new-agey vegan place
4
00:00:10,911 --> 00:00:12,213
is on my way home.
5
00:00:12,246 --> 00:00:13,481
Yeah, I love the food,
6
00:00:13,514 --> 00:00:15,649
but it would be way too awkward
to run into Nick.
7
00:00:15,683 --> 00:00:18,519
Well, I'm not
doing it anymore.
8
00:00:18,552 --> 00:00:21,021
It's full of people who think
natural deodorant works,
9
00:00:21,055 --> 00:00:22,856
but it doesn't.
10
00:00:22,890 --> 00:00:24,592
Their patchouli
disorients you
11
00:00:24,625 --> 00:00:26,727
so the B.O. can attach itself
to your clothes
12
00:00:26,760 --> 00:00:28,996
and follow you home.
13
00:00:29,029 --> 00:00:31,199
Oh, yeah.
It's on there.
14
00:00:32,233 --> 00:00:34,435
Why would it be awkward
for you to run into Nick?
15
00:00:34,468 --> 00:00:35,669
I'm gonna tell you
16
00:00:35,703 --> 00:00:37,438
so that you don't make
the same dating mistakes
17
00:00:37,471 --> 00:00:39,373
that I did.
18
00:00:39,407 --> 00:00:41,409
Ben was a schmuck.
19
00:00:41,442 --> 00:00:44,278
And he baited me into a fight
that drove Nick away.
20
00:00:44,312 --> 00:00:45,613
Dad said
Nick broke up with you
21
00:00:45,646 --> 00:00:47,014
because you're
a black widow spider
22
00:00:47,047 --> 00:00:48,249
who sucks the souls
out of men
23
00:00:48,282 --> 00:00:50,418
and leaves their dreams
tangled in your web.
24
00:00:52,586 --> 00:00:54,054
Prove me wrong.
25
00:00:54,088 --> 00:00:55,389
You know what?
26
00:00:55,423 --> 00:00:58,292
I've had enough of you people
making a bad situation worse.
27
00:00:58,326 --> 00:01:00,294
Yes, I've had
terrible relationships.
28
00:01:00,328 --> 00:01:03,030
Thanks for reminding me
every minute of my waking life.
29
00:01:03,063 --> 00:01:04,765
I'm gonna go eat
in the living room.
30
00:01:05,733 --> 00:01:08,035
Wow.
She's really upset.
31
00:01:08,068 --> 00:01:12,072
She just needs to be alone
with her thoughts.
32
00:01:12,106 --> 00:01:15,143
I think we know
what we have to do.
33
00:01:15,176 --> 00:01:18,045
Together: Oh, Darlene!
34
00:01:18,078 --> 00:01:20,148
Come here, big baby!
35
00:01:22,516 --> 00:01:25,486
-- Captions by VITA --
36
00:01:25,519 --> 00:01:31,525
**
37
00:01:33,261 --> 00:01:39,267
**
38
00:01:40,968 --> 00:01:46,974
**
39
00:01:48,642 --> 00:01:55,349
**
40
00:01:59,387 --> 00:02:02,156
Thank you so much for making
sandwiches for Aldo's boys.
41
00:02:02,190 --> 00:02:04,292
They're odd, but they're
actually pretty sweet.
42
00:02:04,325 --> 00:02:05,993
They like me now.
Be careful.
43
00:02:06,026 --> 00:02:08,796
They liked the hamster
before they decided to play
44
00:02:08,829 --> 00:02:11,465
"Hey, let's see how far
we can throw the hamster!"
45
00:02:13,367 --> 00:02:14,768
Sorry for barging in,
guys.
46
00:02:14,802 --> 00:02:16,036
Um, Harris,
47
00:02:16,069 --> 00:02:17,471
my dad just showed up
out of nowhere
48
00:02:17,505 --> 00:02:18,972
and wants to see the kids.
49
00:02:19,006 --> 00:02:20,208
Could you help me
get them packed up?
50
00:02:20,241 --> 00:02:21,775
Okay, well,
I'll come with you.
51
00:02:21,809 --> 00:02:22,976
I'd love to meet your dad.
52
00:02:23,010 --> 00:02:24,144
Not a good idea.
53
00:02:24,178 --> 00:02:26,347
See, the thing is,
he just wants to see the boys.
54
00:02:26,380 --> 00:02:28,216
He doesn't want to see you.
55
00:02:28,249 --> 00:02:31,485
I've been with those kids.
That's not the pick I'd make.
56
00:02:31,519 --> 00:02:33,053
Wait, what's his problem
with me?
57
00:02:33,086 --> 00:02:34,788
Have you told him
anything about me?
58
00:02:34,822 --> 00:02:36,123
Yeah, totally.
59
00:02:36,156 --> 00:02:37,791
I told him you're a hot
19-year-old
60
00:02:37,825 --> 00:02:39,327
who I met
at a tattoo parlor,
61
00:02:39,360 --> 00:02:42,496
and somehow, he spun that
into a bad thing.
62
00:02:42,530 --> 00:02:44,164
You gotta get this sorted out
before I move in,
63
00:02:44,198 --> 00:02:45,966
or it's gonna be weird
when he visits.
64
00:02:45,999 --> 00:02:49,803
Yeah, um, more bad news
on that front.
65
00:02:49,837 --> 00:02:51,305
Um...
66
00:02:51,339 --> 00:02:53,474
he's totally against
you moving in.
67
00:02:53,507 --> 00:02:54,842
What?
68
00:02:54,875 --> 00:02:56,143
That's insane.
69
00:02:56,176 --> 00:02:57,645
You're 38 years old.
70
00:02:57,678 --> 00:02:59,247
Why are you even
listening to him?
71
00:02:59,280 --> 00:03:00,748
He's my dad.
72
00:03:00,781 --> 00:03:02,916
I can't just shut him down
without hearing him out, babe.
73
00:03:03,917 --> 00:03:07,020
Look, let's see if we can
handle things differently
74
00:03:07,054 --> 00:03:08,856
with your dad
this time.
75
00:03:08,889 --> 00:03:10,724
Ask him to come over
and talk to me,
76
00:03:10,758 --> 00:03:12,025
geezer to geezer.
77
00:03:12,059 --> 00:03:13,427
Really?
You would do that?
78
00:03:13,461 --> 00:03:15,162
Yeah.
Thank you, Grandpa.
79
00:03:15,195 --> 00:03:16,897
Aww, that's super cool.
80
00:03:19,967 --> 00:03:22,069
I would have never
asked you to do that.
81
00:03:22,102 --> 00:03:24,238
I'd do anything to make
my granddaughter happy.
82
00:03:24,272 --> 00:03:27,040
And you remind me
of my younger self --
83
00:03:27,074 --> 00:03:29,877
an irresponsible dumbass.
84
00:03:29,910 --> 00:03:31,279
I was, uh --
I was talking to my friends
85
00:03:31,312 --> 00:03:33,914
down at the arcade,
and they said at 38,
86
00:03:33,947 --> 00:03:36,450
guys' brains aren't even
fully developed.
87
00:03:36,484 --> 00:03:39,152
Don't strain yourself, man.
Just take the compliment.
88
00:03:42,155 --> 00:03:44,392
I really needed
a chill movie night.
89
00:03:44,425 --> 00:03:46,026
Why do we have to sit
so close?
90
00:03:46,059 --> 00:03:48,228
Oh, Ben likes being
near the screen,
91
00:03:48,262 --> 00:03:50,331
and I guess
I got used to it.
92
00:03:52,433 --> 00:03:54,802
Well, that explains why
he's sitting with a date
93
00:03:54,835 --> 00:03:57,070
in the row
right in front of us.
94
00:03:57,104 --> 00:03:58,672
Oh, crap.
95
00:03:59,640 --> 00:04:01,442
Let's go.
No, no.
96
00:04:01,475 --> 00:04:02,810
I can handle this.
97
00:04:02,843 --> 00:04:05,946
Even though he busted up
my relationship with Nick,
98
00:04:05,979 --> 00:04:08,248
I'm gonna show him
that I am way healthier
99
00:04:08,282 --> 00:04:09,950
and I am fine
with him dating.
100
00:04:09,983 --> 00:04:11,084
Then how about this?
101
00:04:11,118 --> 00:04:14,254
We sit in the back
and lob Milk Duds at him.
102
00:04:14,288 --> 00:04:16,757
He'll never know
where they're coming from.
103
00:04:16,790 --> 00:04:19,092
No. But I-I-I have to
tell him I'm here.
104
00:04:19,126 --> 00:04:20,227
Otherwise, if he sees me,
105
00:04:20,260 --> 00:04:22,229
he's gonna think
I'm stalking him.
106
00:04:22,262 --> 00:04:25,165
Wait, is that why
we're here?
107
00:04:25,198 --> 00:04:26,667
Are you stalking him?
108
00:04:26,700 --> 00:04:29,136
No. If I were stalking him,
I wouldn't have brought you.
109
00:04:29,169 --> 00:04:30,671
You're super loud.
110
00:04:32,673 --> 00:04:34,141
[ Indistinct chatter ]
111
00:04:34,174 --> 00:04:35,476
Hey, there!
112
00:04:36,677 --> 00:04:38,812
Hey. Okay, well --
113
00:04:38,846 --> 00:04:40,180
I guess living
in a small town
114
00:04:40,213 --> 00:04:42,516
means this is gonna happen
once in a while.
115
00:04:42,550 --> 00:04:46,520
Especially at the [Chuckles]
Lanford Monoplex.
116
00:04:46,554 --> 00:04:48,522
Darlene, this is Laura.
117
00:04:48,556 --> 00:04:51,459
Hi, I'm Darlene --
the ex.
118
00:04:51,492 --> 00:04:53,193
Oh, hello.
[ Laughs ]
119
00:04:53,226 --> 00:04:54,595
Uh, sorry to bother you.
Yep.
120
00:04:54,628 --> 00:04:57,197
I just wanted Ben to know
this was a total accident...
121
00:04:57,230 --> 00:04:59,132
Oh.
...and I have no problem
122
00:04:59,166 --> 00:05:00,468
with him dating.
Oh.
123
00:05:00,501 --> 00:05:04,137
So, if you guys wanna
hold hands, go for it.
124
00:05:04,171 --> 00:05:06,374
I'm just gonna be
back here with Becky.
125
00:05:08,342 --> 00:05:09,377
Hey, Becky.
126
00:05:09,410 --> 00:05:10,644
Hi, Ben.
127
00:05:12,012 --> 00:05:14,281
So...
128
00:05:14,314 --> 00:05:15,649
enjoy the movie!
129
00:05:18,819 --> 00:05:20,554
[ Sighs ]
130
00:05:20,588 --> 00:05:22,790
What do you think?
Handled that well, right?
131
00:05:22,823 --> 00:05:24,057
Yeah.
132
00:05:24,091 --> 00:05:28,028
It was just the right amount
of excruciatingly awkward.
133
00:05:28,061 --> 00:05:29,463
Oh, man.
134
00:05:29,497 --> 00:05:31,264
What, you think I made
his date uncomfortable?
135
00:05:32,232 --> 00:05:34,001
Let me go fix that.
Darlene --
136
00:05:35,603 --> 00:05:37,538
Hi, Laura.
137
00:05:37,571 --> 00:05:39,907
My sister feels like
I made you uncomfortable.
138
00:05:39,940 --> 00:05:42,810
But don't be --
I am not stalking him.
139
00:05:42,843 --> 00:05:44,678
The only reason
we're at the same movie
140
00:05:44,712 --> 00:05:49,149
is because I love "Ghost World,"
so I turned him onto it.
141
00:05:49,182 --> 00:05:50,984
But you know what --
it's not like it's our movie.
142
00:05:51,018 --> 00:05:51,985
You know what?
143
00:05:52,019 --> 00:05:54,021
You can make it your movie.
144
00:05:54,054 --> 00:05:56,590
I gift you the movie.
145
00:05:56,624 --> 00:05:57,925
I mean, I'm still
gonna be back here,
146
00:05:57,958 --> 00:05:59,259
but you know what I mean.
Okay, thanks.
147
00:05:59,292 --> 00:06:01,762
Enjoy the movie.
You too.
148
00:06:03,964 --> 00:06:05,566
Okay.
149
00:06:05,599 --> 00:06:07,668
Done and done.
150
00:06:07,701 --> 00:06:09,169
You sure?
151
00:06:09,202 --> 00:06:10,571
You done?
152
00:06:11,905 --> 00:06:13,474
Good!
153
00:06:15,042 --> 00:06:17,110
I kinda like
his date's hair.
154
00:06:17,144 --> 00:06:18,846
[ Sighs ]
155
00:06:18,879 --> 00:06:20,548
I do, too.
156
00:06:20,581 --> 00:06:22,049
I should tell her.
157
00:06:24,151 --> 00:06:25,619
Hey, by the way...
Oh, my God.
158
00:06:25,653 --> 00:06:27,588
...I love your hair.
159
00:06:27,621 --> 00:06:28,722
I mean, just 'cause
I'm the ex
160
00:06:28,756 --> 00:06:31,124
doesn't mean I can't
enjoy your style, right?
161
00:06:31,158 --> 00:06:32,125
Y-You know what?
162
00:06:32,159 --> 00:06:33,761
We should get coffee sometime.
163
00:06:33,794 --> 00:06:36,464
Talk about this guy, huh?
Darlene.
164
00:06:36,497 --> 00:06:40,133
Darlene, just stop
talking to us.
165
00:06:40,167 --> 00:06:42,736
Stop talking to her.
Stop talking to me.
166
00:06:42,770 --> 00:06:44,738
Just -- On behalf
of people everywhere,
167
00:06:44,772 --> 00:06:46,607
stop talking.
168
00:06:46,640 --> 00:06:47,608
Sorry.
[ Sighs ]
169
00:06:47,641 --> 00:06:50,043
I am very, very sorry.
170
00:06:50,077 --> 00:06:51,479
Let's just go
somewhere else
171
00:06:51,512 --> 00:06:53,747
where they don't
let crazy people in.
172
00:06:58,486 --> 00:07:01,154
[ Sighs ] I can't believe
you didn't stop me.
173
00:07:02,289 --> 00:07:03,791
I told you we should leave!
174
00:07:03,824 --> 00:07:05,593
I told you
you couldn't handle it!
175
00:07:05,626 --> 00:07:07,127
I told you
we should sit in the back
176
00:07:07,160 --> 00:07:08,929
and throw Milk Duds at him!
177
00:07:08,962 --> 00:07:11,732
Shh!
[ Mockingly ] I told you you were loud.
178
00:07:16,737 --> 00:07:17,370
[ Knock on door ]
[ Groans ]
179
00:07:19,707 --> 00:07:22,442
Remember, Harris really
wants this to work out.
180
00:07:22,476 --> 00:07:25,112
Aldo's dad is here,
so be nice.
181
00:07:26,313 --> 00:07:28,315
When the hell am I not nice?
182
00:07:30,117 --> 00:07:31,919
Hey.
Hey! You must be Jesse.
183
00:07:31,952 --> 00:07:33,120
I'm Dan. Come on in.
184
00:07:33,153 --> 00:07:34,254
Thanks, man.
Yeah.
185
00:07:34,287 --> 00:07:36,256
And I'm Harris' aunt,
Jackie.
186
00:07:36,289 --> 00:07:38,325
Oh, it's so sweet of you
to bring beer.
187
00:07:38,358 --> 00:07:40,360
It's really refreshing
to see somebody
188
00:07:40,393 --> 00:07:43,130
who doesn't show up
to the door empty-handed.
189
00:07:43,163 --> 00:07:44,765
Oh, I just
brought these for me
190
00:07:44,798 --> 00:07:47,200
'cause I didn't know
what kind you guys have.
191
00:07:47,234 --> 00:07:50,604
You get used to something,
you want it all the time.
192
00:07:50,638 --> 00:07:53,641
It's kinda like
your favorite pickle.
193
00:07:53,674 --> 00:07:55,676
I get it.
I like gherkins.
194
00:07:55,709 --> 00:07:57,611
You can put one
between your cheek and gum
195
00:07:57,645 --> 00:08:00,648
and have your own
secret little treat.
196
00:08:00,681 --> 00:08:04,685
Well, I will leave you men
to talk about your pickles.
197
00:08:04,718 --> 00:08:06,954
[ Chuckles ] I'd stay,
but, uh, I have an appointment
198
00:08:06,987 --> 00:08:08,488
with my psychic.
199
00:08:08,522 --> 00:08:10,724
Aldo's mom was a psychic!
200
00:08:10,758 --> 00:08:12,325
No wait, psy-- psy--
201
00:08:12,359 --> 00:08:13,360
psychotic.
202
00:08:13,393 --> 00:08:15,162
I get those confused.
203
00:08:18,365 --> 00:08:20,801
Why don't we take this
in the kitchen?
204
00:08:20,834 --> 00:08:23,537
I'd be a bad host
if I let you drink alone.
205
00:08:23,571 --> 00:08:25,573
Yeah, you would.
206
00:08:27,675 --> 00:08:29,309
Oh, I didn't know
you had that kind.
207
00:08:29,342 --> 00:08:30,844
I'll take one.
208
00:08:32,012 --> 00:08:33,647
I'll put these back
in my truck.
209
00:08:33,681 --> 00:08:35,515
My gas gauge doesn't work,
210
00:08:35,549 --> 00:08:38,351
so I like to have
emergency "walking beer"
211
00:08:38,385 --> 00:08:40,453
for when the truck
stops coasting.
212
00:08:42,422 --> 00:08:43,624
Good plan.
213
00:08:45,025 --> 00:08:46,927
So... [ Sighs ]
214
00:08:47,861 --> 00:08:49,597
I hear tell you don't think
it's a good idea
215
00:08:49,630 --> 00:08:51,765
for Harris to move in
with your son.
216
00:08:51,799 --> 00:08:55,102
No, I think
it's a terrible idea.
217
00:08:55,135 --> 00:08:57,104
She's not
the right woman for him.
218
00:08:57,137 --> 00:08:58,639
Hey, you got
anything crunchy?
219
00:09:00,040 --> 00:09:02,242
Just our milk. Listen.
220
00:09:02,275 --> 00:09:03,611
You and I
have been alive long enough
221
00:09:03,644 --> 00:09:05,445
to be a good judge
of people.
222
00:09:05,478 --> 00:09:08,949
Harris isn't just
some irresponsible dropout.
223
00:09:08,982 --> 00:09:10,283
She pays rent.
224
00:09:10,317 --> 00:09:13,453
She's got a steady job.
She's a solid person.
225
00:09:13,486 --> 00:09:16,089
Way I see it,
Aldo is damn lucky to have her.
226
00:09:16,123 --> 00:09:18,458
I didn't say she's bad.
227
00:09:18,491 --> 00:09:20,427
I said she's not right.
228
00:09:20,460 --> 00:09:22,129
I'm a roofer, Dan.
229
00:09:22,162 --> 00:09:23,363
And like a lot of roofers,
230
00:09:23,396 --> 00:09:26,600
a couple bees chased me
off a two-story
231
00:09:26,634 --> 00:09:29,637
into a wheelbarrow
full of bricks.
232
00:09:34,975 --> 00:09:36,777
[ Clears throat ]
233
00:09:36,810 --> 00:09:40,080
Were the bees mad 'cause
your story didn't have a point?
234
00:09:40,113 --> 00:09:41,081
I'm getting there.
235
00:09:41,114 --> 00:09:43,316
I'm a storyteller, Dan.
236
00:09:43,350 --> 00:09:48,121
Anyway, [Coughs] a man needs
a woman he can count on.
237
00:09:48,155 --> 00:09:51,959
And Aldo's mom, Marlene --
238
00:09:51,992 --> 00:09:56,496
she was there for me
after the accident.
239
00:09:56,529 --> 00:09:58,465
She taught me
how to read and write
240
00:09:58,498 --> 00:10:01,268
and play harmonica again.
241
00:10:01,301 --> 00:10:02,770
You're a lucky man.
242
00:10:02,803 --> 00:10:05,005
That must have been
before she went psychotic.
243
00:10:05,038 --> 00:10:07,174
No, that happened
244
00:10:07,207 --> 00:10:09,609
right after I slept
with her sister.
245
00:10:10,844 --> 00:10:12,746
Oh.
I told her --
246
00:10:12,780 --> 00:10:14,614
I told her
it was dark, and --
247
00:10:14,648 --> 00:10:17,484
and they're pretty much
the same height.
248
00:10:18,786 --> 00:10:21,321
She came at me
with the rake anyway.
249
00:10:22,990 --> 00:10:25,392
You never know what's gonna
set a woman off.
250
00:10:26,794 --> 00:10:28,996
But bottom line is,
251
00:10:29,029 --> 00:10:31,131
what you and I think...
252
00:10:31,164 --> 00:10:32,532
don't mean squat.
253
00:10:32,565 --> 00:10:34,634
Harris and Aldo are adults.
254
00:10:34,668 --> 00:10:36,303
You can't tell 'em
what to do.
255
00:10:36,336 --> 00:10:39,106
Aldo's not an adult, Dan.
256
00:10:39,139 --> 00:10:41,274
It's painful for me
to say this,
257
00:10:41,308 --> 00:10:44,011
'cause they never set
my jaw right...
258
00:10:45,813 --> 00:10:47,948
...but he...
259
00:10:47,981 --> 00:10:51,685
is a 38-year-old
man-baby
260
00:10:51,719 --> 00:10:54,387
who still likes to
jump up and down on the bed
261
00:10:54,421 --> 00:10:56,123
in the morning.
262
00:10:56,156 --> 00:10:58,992
He still watches
"Blue's Clues."
263
00:11:00,360 --> 00:11:03,030
He never fell off a --
a roof or nothin'.
264
00:11:03,063 --> 00:11:05,598
That's just the way he is.
265
00:11:07,167 --> 00:11:09,369
Wait, I-I'm confused.
266
00:11:09,402 --> 00:11:10,637
Harris isn't the problem.
267
00:11:10,670 --> 00:11:13,306
You're saying Aldo isn't
mature enough for her.
268
00:11:13,340 --> 00:11:15,675
That's exactly
what I'm saying.
269
00:11:15,709 --> 00:11:17,978
You heard about
the first wife, right?
270
00:11:18,011 --> 00:11:20,647
Only that she was
a drug addict.
271
00:11:20,680 --> 00:11:22,315
Not at the beginning.
272
00:11:22,349 --> 00:11:24,351
The woman had
a Master's degree.
273
00:11:24,384 --> 00:11:27,520
When Aldo and those creepy kids
were done with her...
274
00:11:28,688 --> 00:11:31,358
...she was smokin' rock
under a bridge
275
00:11:31,391 --> 00:11:33,426
and talking to her foot.
276
00:11:35,428 --> 00:11:38,732
If you give a crap
about your granddaughter...
277
00:11:40,200 --> 00:11:42,803
...you gotta get her
out of this.
278
00:11:43,871 --> 00:11:44,972
Wow.
279
00:11:46,306 --> 00:11:48,541
Thanks, Jesse.
280
00:11:48,575 --> 00:11:51,344
I know it must be hard
for a parent
281
00:11:51,378 --> 00:11:53,646
to see their kid
the way they really are.
282
00:11:55,115 --> 00:11:56,784
I'll talk to Harris.
283
00:11:56,817 --> 00:11:58,218
Good.
284
00:11:58,251 --> 00:12:00,387
Good.
285
00:12:00,420 --> 00:12:03,090
Um, can I siphon some gas
286
00:12:03,123 --> 00:12:05,225
out of your lawnmower
to get home?
287
00:12:06,960 --> 00:12:09,196
I'm sorry, man.
I don't have a lawnmower.
288
00:12:09,229 --> 00:12:12,766
All right, uh, why don't you
just give me ten bucks
289
00:12:12,800 --> 00:12:14,701
and we'll call it even?
290
00:12:14,734 --> 00:12:16,103
How about this --
you give me 20
291
00:12:16,136 --> 00:12:17,604
and I'll owe you 10.
292
00:12:17,637 --> 00:12:18,906
Nice.
[ Chuckles ]
293
00:12:18,939 --> 00:12:20,941
I'm gonna remember that one.
294
00:12:22,242 --> 00:12:27,147
**
295
00:12:31,518 --> 00:12:35,388
So, I just spent 45 minutes
on the phone with Laura
296
00:12:35,422 --> 00:12:36,623
trying to convince her
297
00:12:36,656 --> 00:12:40,660
that it is safe
to go on another date with me.
298
00:12:40,693 --> 00:12:42,996
Why did you do that?
299
00:12:43,030 --> 00:12:44,832
I was just trying
to show you
300
00:12:44,865 --> 00:12:46,466
that I was cool
with you dating.
301
00:12:46,499 --> 00:12:48,902
[ Scoffs ]
I'll tell her.
302
00:12:48,936 --> 00:12:50,437
[ Scoffs ]
Hey, Siri?
303
00:12:50,470 --> 00:12:52,272
Call Laura.
304
00:12:52,305 --> 00:12:53,440
Siri: Calling Laura.
305
00:12:53,473 --> 00:12:54,942
God, no!
306
00:12:59,980 --> 00:13:01,849
[ Groans ]
307
00:13:03,783 --> 00:13:06,119
Look, I'm sorry, okay?
308
00:13:06,153 --> 00:13:09,322
I didn't expect
to see you with somebody.
309
00:13:09,356 --> 00:13:11,624
And it caught me
a little off-guard,
310
00:13:11,658 --> 00:13:15,195
and I went too far
in front of your new girlfriend.
311
00:13:16,629 --> 00:13:18,531
Is she your new girlfriend?
312
00:13:18,565 --> 00:13:23,103
Is that what that insanity
at the theater was all about?
313
00:13:23,136 --> 00:13:26,673
Trying to figure out
how serious I am about Laura?
314
00:13:26,706 --> 00:13:29,609
No, absolutely not.
315
00:13:29,642 --> 00:13:32,679
But obviously, you're dying
to tell me, so go ahead.
316
00:13:35,082 --> 00:13:37,050
We've only been
on three dates, okay?
317
00:13:37,084 --> 00:13:40,287
So I don't know
where it's going.
318
00:13:40,320 --> 00:13:42,689
Actually, two, 'cause she's not
letting me count last night
319
00:13:42,722 --> 00:13:45,592
'cause of, you know,
the "tiny lunatic."
320
00:13:47,494 --> 00:13:48,962
Sorry.
321
00:13:48,996 --> 00:13:50,830
It's hard.
322
00:13:50,864 --> 00:13:52,232
I know.
323
00:13:59,772 --> 00:14:01,341
So?
324
00:14:01,374 --> 00:14:03,476
Is she a nice person?
325
00:14:03,510 --> 00:14:06,179
Yeah, I like her.
326
00:14:06,213 --> 00:14:08,848
You know, she's easy
to be with.
327
00:14:09,950 --> 00:14:12,352
Well, that must be
a nice change of pace, huh?
328
00:14:14,587 --> 00:14:16,356
You know,
you go through stuff,
329
00:14:16,389 --> 00:14:19,626
and you figure out
what you want.
330
00:14:22,095 --> 00:14:24,097
I think I want easy.
331
00:14:36,476 --> 00:14:38,678
[ Insects chirping ]
332
00:14:38,711 --> 00:14:40,547
[ Door closes ]
333
00:14:45,418 --> 00:14:46,853
Hey.
Hey.
334
00:14:46,886 --> 00:14:48,922
Don't tell the kids
we went sledding.
335
00:14:48,956 --> 00:14:51,224
Everything's more fun
without them.
336
00:14:51,258 --> 00:14:52,425
Whew!
337
00:14:52,459 --> 00:14:54,094
Dad pulled me
behind his truck!
338
00:14:54,127 --> 00:14:56,296
Yeah, the exhaust
makes you giddy,
339
00:14:56,329 --> 00:14:58,999
and the intersections
are a real rush.
340
00:15:00,300 --> 00:15:01,734
Sounds like fun.
341
00:15:01,768 --> 00:15:03,603
Ah, she's gonna ruin
our buzz.
342
00:15:03,636 --> 00:15:04,972
I know it.
343
00:15:05,005 --> 00:15:06,773
Let's get out quick.
344
00:15:06,806 --> 00:15:08,108
It's too late.
345
00:15:08,141 --> 00:15:09,476
She's seen us.
346
00:15:09,509 --> 00:15:10,910
[ Laughs ]
347
00:15:10,944 --> 00:15:11,911
What's wrong?
348
00:15:11,945 --> 00:15:13,947
Ben was just over here.
349
00:15:13,981 --> 00:15:16,549
Ah, he come to read you
the riot act?
350
00:15:16,583 --> 00:15:17,417
He said
he doesn't want to be
351
00:15:17,450 --> 00:15:18,986
with someone like me
anymore.
352
00:15:19,019 --> 00:15:21,654
Well, he -- he did
leave you some clues --
353
00:15:21,688 --> 00:15:23,123
the breakup, uh,
354
00:15:23,156 --> 00:15:26,893
his devastating rejection
of your proposal,
355
00:15:26,926 --> 00:15:28,795
his moving on
with another woman.
356
00:15:28,828 --> 00:15:31,264
I mean, individually,
it doesn't seem like much,
357
00:15:31,298 --> 00:15:33,666
but when you put it
all together...
358
00:15:35,768 --> 00:15:38,238
No, I know that.
359
00:15:38,271 --> 00:15:41,574
I guess when I started
my spiritual journey,
360
00:15:41,608 --> 00:15:43,943
on some level,
I thought when I was, like,
361
00:15:43,977 --> 00:15:46,779
the new, improved Darlene,
I could get him back.
362
00:15:46,813 --> 00:15:49,116
There's no reason
that can't happen.
363
00:15:49,149 --> 00:15:51,018
Yeah, there is.
He wants easy.
364
00:15:51,051 --> 00:15:52,119
I'm never gonna be that.
365
00:15:52,152 --> 00:15:53,820
I'm always gonna be hard.
366
00:15:55,455 --> 00:15:56,856
[ Sighs ]
367
00:15:56,889 --> 00:15:59,159
I freakin' told you
she'd kill our buzz!
368
00:15:59,192 --> 00:16:01,228
Damn it!
369
00:16:02,895 --> 00:16:04,297
So? I'm dying to know.
370
00:16:04,331 --> 00:16:05,465
How'd it go
with Aldo's dad?
371
00:16:05,498 --> 00:16:07,167
I'll tell you.
372
00:16:07,200 --> 00:16:09,336
But watch the game with me.
Okay, but I'm starving.
373
00:16:09,369 --> 00:16:10,703
I'm gonna grab a yogurt.
374
00:16:10,737 --> 00:16:12,705
Uh, while you're in there,
could you grab some chips...
375
00:16:12,739 --> 00:16:14,941
Mm-hmm.
...and decide not to stay with Aldo
376
00:16:14,974 --> 00:16:17,210
'cause you're too young for him
and he's too immature
377
00:16:17,244 --> 00:16:19,312
and I don't want to see you
throw your life away?
378
00:16:19,346 --> 00:16:21,114
Appreciate it.
379
00:16:21,148 --> 00:16:23,283
[ Knock on door ]
What are you talking about?
380
00:16:23,316 --> 00:16:25,385
I thought you were okay
with me and Aldo.
381
00:16:25,418 --> 00:16:27,154
What happened yesterday?
382
00:16:28,655 --> 00:16:30,790
Sorry -- I know we spent
a lot of time
383
00:16:30,823 --> 00:16:32,959
detailing the Maserati,
but unfortunately,
384
00:16:32,992 --> 00:16:35,162
we're not going
to race slot cars today.
385
00:16:35,195 --> 00:16:38,465
'Cause I just found out
my dad convinced your grandpa
386
00:16:38,498 --> 00:16:39,732
we shouldn't be together
387
00:16:39,766 --> 00:16:41,934
when he should've
worked it out with me, Dad.
388
00:16:43,170 --> 00:16:45,372
Hi, I'm Jesse.
389
00:16:45,405 --> 00:16:47,640
And I'm Harris,
and I really don't appreciate
390
00:16:47,674 --> 00:16:50,009
you butting into our lives!
391
00:16:50,043 --> 00:16:52,212
I was attacked by bees.
392
00:16:52,245 --> 00:16:53,780
You don't scare me.
393
00:16:54,747 --> 00:16:58,585
Okay, I-I-I-I think
we all need to sit down
394
00:16:58,618 --> 00:17:00,720
and have a respectful
conversation.
395
00:17:01,754 --> 00:17:03,823
So everybody shut
your dumb old pie-holes
396
00:17:03,856 --> 00:17:05,658
and listen to me!
397
00:17:05,692 --> 00:17:07,927
First of all,
watch your mouth.
398
00:17:07,960 --> 00:17:09,262
I'm not dumb.
399
00:17:09,296 --> 00:17:13,366
Second of all, my hole
also enjoys cakes and donuts.
400
00:17:14,467 --> 00:17:16,002
I-I'm sorry, sir.
401
00:17:16,035 --> 00:17:17,904
My father should not have
come over here
402
00:17:17,937 --> 00:17:20,107
and told you that
I'm some kinda loser
403
00:17:20,140 --> 00:17:22,209
who's gonna screw up
Harris' life.
404
00:17:22,242 --> 00:17:23,943
I'm looking at this
differently, son.
405
00:17:23,976 --> 00:17:25,345
I just don't think
Harris is ready
406
00:17:25,378 --> 00:17:27,614
to take on everything
you've got going on.
407
00:17:27,647 --> 00:17:29,216
Can everyone stop
talking about me
408
00:17:29,249 --> 00:17:31,851
like I'm not in the room and
making decisions about my life?
409
00:17:31,884 --> 00:17:33,220
I can speak for myself.
410
00:17:33,253 --> 00:17:35,088
Sure, but I just don't think
you ought to be playing mother
411
00:17:35,122 --> 00:17:36,623
to three kids.
412
00:17:36,656 --> 00:17:38,225
I only have two.
413
00:17:40,227 --> 00:17:41,794
Oh.
414
00:17:41,828 --> 00:17:43,062
Yeah.
415
00:17:44,297 --> 00:17:47,234
How hard do you
really want to fight
416
00:17:47,267 --> 00:17:49,702
when this is the prize?
417
00:17:49,736 --> 00:17:51,271
I'll show you how hard.
418
00:17:51,304 --> 00:17:53,206
I don't care
what any of you say.
419
00:17:53,240 --> 00:17:54,574
I'm moving in
with Aldo and the boys,
420
00:17:54,607 --> 00:17:56,109
and it's gonna be great.
421
00:17:56,143 --> 00:17:57,610
That's right.
422
00:17:57,644 --> 00:17:59,212
Harris is moving in
with me,
423
00:17:59,246 --> 00:18:00,780
and it starts now.
424
00:18:00,813 --> 00:18:03,250
And I don't need
anybody's approval!
425
00:18:03,283 --> 00:18:05,118
How'd I do, baby?
You did great.
426
00:18:05,152 --> 00:18:07,420
Yes!
Let's get the rest of my stuff.
427
00:18:10,590 --> 00:18:13,126
Well, Dan,
it looks like you and me
428
00:18:13,160 --> 00:18:16,163
are probably gonna end up
being in-laws.
429
00:18:16,196 --> 00:18:17,664
Yeah.
430
00:18:19,999 --> 00:18:23,936
And now my boy's mad at me,
I don't have any place to stay.
431
00:18:25,272 --> 00:18:28,341
And, uh, since we're
practically in-laws...
432
00:18:28,375 --> 00:18:29,776
I hear you, Jesse.
433
00:18:29,809 --> 00:18:31,778
And if I didn't like you
so damn much,
434
00:18:31,811 --> 00:18:33,980
I wouldn't be offering you
this here beer
435
00:18:34,013 --> 00:18:36,449
for your walking journey.
436
00:18:36,483 --> 00:18:37,750
Gee, thanks.
437
00:18:37,784 --> 00:18:39,786
One will get me
out to the porch,
438
00:18:39,819 --> 00:18:42,455
two will get me
out of the yard.
439
00:18:42,489 --> 00:18:43,856
See ya.
440
00:18:43,890 --> 00:18:48,328
**
441
00:18:54,234 --> 00:18:55,668
Oh, wow.
442
00:18:55,702 --> 00:18:57,036
I thought it was kids
playing a joke,
443
00:18:57,069 --> 00:18:58,137
'cause when I looked
through the peephole,
444
00:18:58,171 --> 00:19:00,607
there was nobody there.
445
00:19:00,640 --> 00:19:02,542
If you could jump up and down
next time,
446
00:19:02,575 --> 00:19:04,944
then I'd know
the place isn't haunted.
447
00:19:04,977 --> 00:19:06,546
I brought you something.
448
00:19:06,579 --> 00:19:08,315
Oh!
449
00:19:08,348 --> 00:19:10,149
That's nice.
Come on in.
450
00:19:12,519 --> 00:19:14,387
Wow!
451
00:19:14,421 --> 00:19:16,689
Very cute place.
Eh?
452
00:19:16,723 --> 00:19:18,124
Uh-huh.
Thank you.
453
00:19:18,157 --> 00:19:19,792
I mean, it's still
a work in progress, you know?
454
00:19:19,826 --> 00:19:21,294
I'm still trying
to figure out
455
00:19:21,328 --> 00:19:23,963
which wall to hang
my Smash Mouth poster on.
456
00:19:23,996 --> 00:19:26,799
Oh, well, uh,
your closets have walls.
457
00:19:26,833 --> 00:19:28,835
I'd go with one of those.
458
00:19:28,868 --> 00:19:31,638
So, this whole visit's
for the plant?
459
00:19:31,671 --> 00:19:33,206
And to say thank you.
460
00:19:33,240 --> 00:19:34,974
Uh, you were honest
with me,
461
00:19:35,007 --> 00:19:37,009
and it helped me
be honest with myself.
462
00:19:37,043 --> 00:19:39,045
You've moved on,
you got your own place,
463
00:19:39,078 --> 00:19:40,847
and I gotta do
the same thing.
464
00:19:40,880 --> 00:19:42,382
Well, good for you.
465
00:19:42,415 --> 00:19:44,884
And thanks for
the housewarming gift.
466
00:19:44,917 --> 00:19:46,386
Oh. Yeah.
467
00:19:46,419 --> 00:19:48,120
It's really more
of a goodbye gift.
468
00:19:49,622 --> 00:19:51,324
Really?
[ Chuckles ]
469
00:19:51,358 --> 00:19:52,925
Y-You know I work
with your dad
470
00:19:52,959 --> 00:19:55,562
and spend a lot of time
with your kid.
471
00:19:55,595 --> 00:19:57,096
I will be coming over
to the house,
472
00:19:57,129 --> 00:19:58,731
so it's not really goodbye.
473
00:19:58,765 --> 00:20:01,334
I mean, unless you're here
to kill me.
474
00:20:01,368 --> 00:20:04,471
I don't think it's
the right move at this time.
475
00:20:06,138 --> 00:20:08,408
It's not a physical goodbye.
476
00:20:08,441 --> 00:20:10,310
It's an emotional one.
477
00:20:14,213 --> 00:20:16,449
Right.
478
00:20:16,483 --> 00:20:19,552
Well, I hope
everything works out.
479
00:20:19,586 --> 00:20:22,188
And when you find a place,
I'm gonna come over
480
00:20:22,221 --> 00:20:24,757
with a $4 plant I got
from the drugstore, too.
481
00:20:25,792 --> 00:20:27,894
Oh, that's $2 more
than I spent.
482
00:20:27,927 --> 00:20:30,297
I'm saving up
for a house here, so... [ Chuckles ]
483
00:20:33,633 --> 00:20:35,302
**
484
00:20:35,335 --> 00:20:37,169
[ Door closes ]
485
00:20:40,307 --> 00:20:41,941
* I'm going up
486
00:20:41,974 --> 00:20:43,910
* He's going up
487
00:20:43,943 --> 00:20:45,244
* Going down
488
00:20:45,278 --> 00:20:46,579
* He's going down
489
00:20:46,613 --> 00:20:50,082
* Going up, down, down, up
490
00:20:50,116 --> 00:20:53,219
* Any way
you want-a me to *
491
00:20:53,252 --> 00:20:55,722
**
492
00:20:55,755 --> 00:20:58,991
* Yeah, yeah, yeah
493
00:20:59,025 --> 00:21:00,327
Oh, yeah.
494
00:21:00,360 --> 00:21:03,330
[ Guitar riff ]
495
00:21:03,363 --> 00:21:07,066
* I'm going up, down,
Jackson Browne *
496
00:21:07,099 --> 00:21:08,435
**
497
00:21:08,468 --> 00:21:09,836
* Lost and found
498
00:21:09,869 --> 00:21:11,270
* All around
499
00:21:11,304 --> 00:21:12,505
* Downtown
500
00:21:12,539 --> 00:21:14,941
* Liquor clown
501
00:21:14,974 --> 00:21:17,477
**
502
00:21:17,510 --> 00:21:20,146
[ Plays harmonica ]
503
00:21:20,179 --> 00:21:26,386
**
504
00:21:26,436 --> 00:21:30,986
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