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These are the user uploaded subtitles that are being translated: 1 00:00:22,023 --> 00:00:26,194 [birds chirping, shrieking] 2 00:00:26,277 --> 00:00:29,948 [man narrating] 'Twas brillig, and the slithy toves 3 00:00:30,031 --> 00:00:33,410 did gyre and gimble in the wabe. 4 00:00:33,493 --> 00:00:36,663 All mimsy were the borogoves, 5 00:00:36,746 --> 00:00:39,374 and the mome raths outgrabe. 6 00:00:42,961 --> 00:00:46,089 [whistling melody] 7 00:01:05,150 --> 00:01:07,360 [whistling continues] 8 00:01:11,656 --> 00:01:14,576 [stomping] 9 00:01:17,871 --> 00:01:20,707 [whistling continues] 10 00:01:21,708 --> 00:01:24,127 [animal whimpering] 11 00:01:31,468 --> 00:01:33,303 [whistling stops] 12 00:01:34,429 --> 00:01:37,849 - [whistling continues] - [animal snarling] 13 00:01:51,780 --> 00:01:55,033 [whistling continues] 14 00:01:55,116 --> 00:01:57,744 [animal continues snarling] 15 00:02:12,592 --> 00:02:15,595 [low growling] 16 00:02:22,268 --> 00:02:24,437 [growling continues] 17 00:02:28,733 --> 00:02:32,070 [creature snarling] 18 00:02:32,153 --> 00:02:34,364 [man screaming] 19 00:02:34,447 --> 00:02:37,450 [creature roaring] 20 00:02:50,046 --> 00:02:53,258 [creature breathing] 21 00:02:54,342 --> 00:02:56,344 [heavy footsteps] 22 00:02:56,427 --> 00:02:58,429 [animal chittering] 23 00:03:06,855 --> 00:03:08,648 - [crowd shouting] - [bell tolling] 24 00:03:08,731 --> 00:03:12,068 [narrator] It is the middle of the Dark Ages. 25 00:03:12,151 --> 00:03:16,865 Ages darker than anyone had ever expected. 26 00:03:16,948 --> 00:03:22,203 An horrendous monster casts a dreadful pall of fear 27 00:03:22,287 --> 00:03:24,664 over a once-happy land. 28 00:03:25,415 --> 00:03:28,793 As towns and villages are torn apart, 29 00:03:28,877 --> 00:03:32,046 the helpless survivors seek refuge 30 00:03:32,130 --> 00:03:35,133 behind the walls of the great city. 31 00:03:36,134 --> 00:03:38,887 But out in the forest, 32 00:03:38,970 --> 00:03:43,516 in isolated pockets still untouched 33 00:03:43,600 --> 00:03:46,436 by the ravages of the monster, 34 00:03:46,519 --> 00:03:52,275 life and business goes on as usual. 35 00:03:53,401 --> 00:03:57,322 [man] Twelve, 13, 14. 36 00:03:57,405 --> 00:03:59,073 There's another little one. Fifteen. 37 00:03:59,157 --> 00:04:01,326 What are you doing out there, Dennis? 38 00:04:01,409 --> 00:04:03,328 Stock-taking, Father. 39 00:04:03,411 --> 00:04:05,622 [Father] Thought you took stock this morning. 40 00:04:05,705 --> 00:04:06,789 Oh, yes, I did. 41 00:04:06,873 --> 00:04:09,626 But it never hurts to keep an accurate, up-to-the-moment account of your stock. 42 00:04:09,709 --> 00:04:11,294 In business nowadays, Father... 43 00:04:11,377 --> 00:04:14,797 Never mind that nonsense and come and help me with this cask. 44 00:04:15,590 --> 00:04:18,176 All right, Father. I'll finish stock-taking later. 45 00:04:18,259 --> 00:04:20,386 [grunts] 46 00:04:20,470 --> 00:04:22,013 There. 47 00:04:22,096 --> 00:04:26,601 You see, the secret of the craft is to keep the stake... 48 00:04:28,353 --> 00:04:30,605 Take hold of the hoop. 49 00:04:30,688 --> 00:04:33,775 - [bell clanging] - Hello, Dennis. Ralph. 50 00:04:34,525 --> 00:04:36,486 - Oh. - [grumbles] 51 00:04:37,445 --> 00:04:39,155 - Good day, Mr. Fishfinger. - Aye. 52 00:04:39,238 --> 00:04:42,518 - Can I be of some assistance to you today? - [Father] Oh, Dennis. What are you... 53 00:04:42,575 --> 00:04:45,578 - [grumbles] - [laughs] 54 00:04:46,287 --> 00:04:49,457 Yes, well, uh, you see, I need some barrels, Dennis, 55 00:04:49,540 --> 00:04:52,251 for shipping dried fish to the city. 56 00:04:52,335 --> 00:04:55,046 Big demand there, you know, since this monster scare. 57 00:04:55,129 --> 00:04:58,091 Oh, my goodness. Prices going up all the time. 58 00:04:58,174 --> 00:04:59,926 That's great. That's great. 59 00:05:00,009 --> 00:05:04,305 But tell me, do you believe all these stories about, uh, whole villages being destroyed? 60 00:05:05,056 --> 00:05:07,517 Well, I haven't actually seen the monster myself, you know. 61 00:05:07,600 --> 00:05:10,395 But when I was over in Muckley the other day... 62 00:05:10,478 --> 00:05:12,814 Muckley? That's quite a ways, isn't it? 63 00:05:12,897 --> 00:05:14,899 It's two mile or more, easy. 64 00:05:15,650 --> 00:05:18,444 Gosh, I'd like to travel someday, Mr. Fishfinger. 65 00:05:19,237 --> 00:05:21,197 - Anyway, about the monster... - Oh, yes. 66 00:05:21,280 --> 00:05:24,367 Well, uh, this grain merchant, you see, over in Muckley, 67 00:05:24,450 --> 00:05:28,079 he claimed that he'd actually seen it. 68 00:05:30,081 --> 00:05:34,627 Turned his teeth snow-white overnight, they say. 69 00:05:35,378 --> 00:05:38,673 - [groans] - [groans] Ugh. 70 00:05:38,756 --> 00:05:40,258 Anyway, about the barrels. 71 00:05:40,341 --> 00:05:42,719 Yes, well, must be cheap. 72 00:05:42,802 --> 00:05:44,721 First class, but cheap. Must be cheap. 73 00:05:44,804 --> 00:05:47,348 I think we can attend to your needs, Mr. Fishfinger. 74 00:05:47,432 --> 00:05:50,852 Exactly how, uh... [whispers] inexpensive? 75 00:05:52,353 --> 00:05:54,522 No more than a tuppence apiece. 76 00:05:54,605 --> 00:05:57,400 Tuppence? What are you talking about, Fishfinger? 77 00:05:57,483 --> 00:06:00,778 I can't turn out a decent barrel for that price and you know it. 78 00:06:00,862 --> 00:06:04,240 - Look, Father, don't you think... - Now, Ralph, look, be sensible. 79 00:06:04,323 --> 00:06:07,910 The barrels have only got to last until they get to the city. It's easy money. 80 00:06:07,994 --> 00:06:08,994 No! 81 00:06:09,037 --> 00:06:13,041 I don't make barrels to last two or three days, Fishfinger. 82 00:06:13,916 --> 00:06:16,961 I make barrels to last a lifetime. I'm a craftsman. 83 00:06:17,045 --> 00:06:20,006 - Yes, we know. Everybody knows. - It's something you'll never understand. 84 00:06:20,089 --> 00:06:22,842 - [Fishfinger stammers] - Or you either, Dennis, I'm afraid. 85 00:06:22,925 --> 00:06:26,554 - [Fishfinger continues stammering] - You don't want barrels! You want bags! 86 00:06:26,637 --> 00:06:28,181 - I... - Now get out! 87 00:06:28,264 --> 00:06:29,766 - Look, Father... - Out! 88 00:06:29,849 --> 00:06:31,809 And don't come back here with your shoddy deals. 89 00:06:31,893 --> 00:06:33,770 - Yes. - Bah! 90 00:06:33,853 --> 00:06:35,855 - Good-bye. Good-bye, Ralph. - Tuppence. 91 00:06:35,938 --> 00:06:39,400 - I'm sorry, Mr. Fishfinger. - It's all right, Dennis. It's all right. 92 00:06:39,484 --> 00:06:42,111 He's given me a very good idea. 93 00:06:43,237 --> 00:06:44,240 It's all right. 94 00:06:44,265 --> 00:06:46,473 Wait, Mr. Fishfinger! I think I can get it... 95 00:06:46,532 --> 00:06:48,910 Bye, Dennis. Salute! 96 00:06:48,993 --> 00:06:52,163 Tuppence. [grumbling] 97 00:07:02,507 --> 00:07:04,217 Griselda. 98 00:07:05,635 --> 00:07:07,887 - Griselda. - Yeah? 99 00:07:07,970 --> 00:07:11,099 It is I, Dennis, come to see you. 100 00:07:11,182 --> 00:07:12,433 I see. 101 00:07:13,351 --> 00:07:16,020 - How are you, my love? - [grunts] 102 00:07:17,855 --> 00:07:20,691 - Have you missed me? - Huh? 103 00:07:20,775 --> 00:07:23,194 Oh, Griselda, it's lovely to see you again. 104 00:07:23,277 --> 00:07:25,655 I think about you all day long when I'm taking stock. 105 00:07:25,738 --> 00:07:28,699 I dream of the day when I'll ask your father for your hand in marriage. 106 00:07:28,783 --> 00:07:30,701 We'll build that little cottage near the village green. 107 00:07:30,785 --> 00:07:32,912 I'll come home from the shop. We'll have supper together. 108 00:07:32,995 --> 00:07:36,165 - [urinating] - Hey, Roger! Roger, what are you doing? 109 00:07:36,249 --> 00:07:37,750 - I just... You... - What? 110 00:07:42,755 --> 00:07:43,923 Oh, Griselda. 111 00:07:44,841 --> 00:07:46,175 Sorry. 112 00:07:46,259 --> 00:07:47,635 Griselda. 113 00:07:48,719 --> 00:07:52,431 I can't ask you to declare your love for me till I'm in a better position to marry you. 114 00:07:52,515 --> 00:07:55,893 But say you'll wait for me. Say I've got a chance. 115 00:07:55,977 --> 00:07:57,979 Oh, let go. 116 00:07:58,062 --> 00:08:00,773 - Why, Griselda? Why? - I've gotta scratch. 117 00:08:01,524 --> 00:08:03,693 Oh, Griselda. Griselda, I... 118 00:08:04,402 --> 00:08:06,279 Oh! Sorry, Dennis. 119 00:08:07,071 --> 00:08:10,032 - How's your father? - Oh, never better, Mrs. Fishfinger. 120 00:08:10,116 --> 00:08:12,118 [gasping] 121 00:08:13,703 --> 00:08:16,423 - [Fishfinger] That Dennis Cooper out there? - [Mrs. Fishfinger] Yes. 122 00:08:17,790 --> 00:08:19,667 Hello, Dennis. 123 00:08:19,750 --> 00:08:21,502 You've got garbage all over your vest. 124 00:08:21,586 --> 00:08:23,296 Tsk-tsk-tsk-tsk. 125 00:08:23,379 --> 00:08:27,175 Really ought to look after your appearance, you know. Very bad for business. 126 00:08:27,258 --> 00:08:29,719 Oh, by the way, I thought you'd like to know, 127 00:08:29,802 --> 00:08:32,722 I got Wat, the mercer, to run me up a few cloth bags. 128 00:08:32,805 --> 00:08:34,015 Only a ha'penny each. 129 00:08:34,098 --> 00:08:37,518 I wish I could have convinced Father to see it your way, Mr. Fishfinger. 130 00:08:37,602 --> 00:08:41,189 Yes, well, you see, a man's got to move with the times. 131 00:08:41,272 --> 00:08:43,024 Still, when you take over the shop, 132 00:08:43,107 --> 00:08:45,234 no doubt we'll do a lot of business together, you and I. 133 00:08:45,318 --> 00:08:47,291 That won't be for some time yet, Mr. Fishfinger. 134 00:08:47,316 --> 00:08:48,845 Well, you never know. Never know. 135 00:08:49,572 --> 00:08:52,241 Oh, well, it's getting late. I'd better be going. 136 00:08:52,325 --> 00:08:54,160 Okay by me. 137 00:08:55,036 --> 00:08:57,038 [Fishfinger] Drop in any time, Dennis. 138 00:08:57,830 --> 00:08:59,498 Good-bye, Griselda. 139 00:09:02,335 --> 00:09:05,338 [thunder rumbling] 140 00:09:10,343 --> 00:09:13,512 [clanking] 141 00:09:14,722 --> 00:09:18,100 - [clanking continues] - [thunder continues rumbling] 142 00:09:22,730 --> 00:09:25,608 - [chattering] - [priest murmuring last rites] 143 00:09:25,691 --> 00:09:27,318 Father! 144 00:09:32,114 --> 00:09:35,034 - [groaning] - [priest continues murmuring] 145 00:09:35,117 --> 00:09:38,204 - Is that you, Dennis? - Yes, Father. 146 00:09:39,538 --> 00:09:42,959 Come closer, Dennis. 147 00:09:43,042 --> 00:09:44,126 Yes, Father. 148 00:09:48,881 --> 00:09:50,466 What happened? 149 00:09:50,549 --> 00:09:52,260 My heart. 150 00:09:53,219 --> 00:09:55,054 I haven't long. 151 00:09:56,973 --> 00:10:00,017 I'm going to... I'm going to... [grunting] 152 00:10:00,643 --> 00:10:02,019 Throw up? 153 00:10:02,103 --> 00:10:04,021 No. 154 00:10:06,774 --> 00:10:08,484 - Oh, Father. - Son. 155 00:10:08,567 --> 00:10:12,321 What shall I do without your guiding hand, without your skill? 156 00:10:14,240 --> 00:10:15,992 - Son. - Yes, Father? 157 00:10:17,368 --> 00:10:18,619 I'll tell you. 158 00:10:20,204 --> 00:10:22,456 You're going to end up just like that... 159 00:10:22,540 --> 00:10:25,501 F... F... F... 160 00:10:27,003 --> 00:10:28,879 Fishfinger. 161 00:10:28,963 --> 00:10:30,923 - Who, me? - [groans] 162 00:10:31,757 --> 00:10:34,802 Oh, Father, I know Mr. Fishfinger is a very successful businessman, but... 163 00:10:34,885 --> 00:10:36,554 [groans] 164 00:10:37,471 --> 00:10:40,516 Because you've got no understanding 165 00:10:40,599 --> 00:10:43,644 of craftsmanship, 166 00:10:43,728 --> 00:10:48,733 no appreciation of the beauty of the wood. 167 00:10:48,816 --> 00:10:50,318 [stammering] 168 00:10:50,401 --> 00:10:52,862 [shouting] Because you're just a shallow, 169 00:10:53,779 --> 00:10:55,740 dull, pretentious... 170 00:10:55,823 --> 00:10:57,241 - Father! - Little... 171 00:10:57,325 --> 00:11:00,745 s-s-s-stock-taker. 172 00:11:00,828 --> 00:11:02,913 Oh, Father, you're delirious. 173 00:11:02,997 --> 00:11:05,082 - Yeah. - You don't know what you're saying. 174 00:11:05,166 --> 00:11:08,377 Oh, yes, I do, you... you whimpering, 175 00:11:08,461 --> 00:11:13,090 snotty-nosed, cretinous oaf! 176 00:11:13,174 --> 00:11:17,178 [grunts] I've wanted to say this for years. 177 00:11:17,261 --> 00:11:18,846 Father, we're not alone. 178 00:11:18,929 --> 00:11:22,016 You're everything I despise! 179 00:11:22,725 --> 00:11:24,352 Dad's raving, I'm afraid. 180 00:11:24,435 --> 00:11:26,937 [man] No, he's not. 181 00:11:27,021 --> 00:11:31,901 You and your kind will drive good, honest craftsmen to the wall. 182 00:11:31,984 --> 00:11:34,862 Do you hear? To the wall! 183 00:11:34,945 --> 00:11:37,365 Honestly, Dad, I was only trying to improve the business. 184 00:11:37,448 --> 00:11:39,325 [grumbling] 185 00:11:39,408 --> 00:11:42,328 You won't have my business... 186 00:11:43,204 --> 00:11:45,206 to improve anymore. 187 00:11:45,289 --> 00:11:47,666 Not my cooperage. 188 00:11:47,750 --> 00:11:51,253 Because I'm... I'm taking it with me. 189 00:11:51,337 --> 00:11:54,965 - But, Dad, I don't understand. - Don't understand, you damn ninny? 190 00:11:55,049 --> 00:11:59,470 I'm renouncing you. You're no son of mine. You're no craftsman's son. 191 00:11:59,553 --> 00:12:00,930 Get out. 192 00:12:01,013 --> 00:12:03,140 Out of my sight... 193 00:12:04,308 --> 00:12:06,936 stock-taker! 194 00:12:07,019 --> 00:12:08,604 [gasps] 195 00:12:08,687 --> 00:12:11,482 [onlookers gasping, murmuring] 196 00:12:15,820 --> 00:12:18,823 [croaking] 197 00:12:21,867 --> 00:12:24,203 - [coughing] - [chattering] 198 00:12:24,286 --> 00:12:26,789 [man burps] 199 00:12:26,872 --> 00:12:28,707 [man farts, groans] 200 00:12:32,336 --> 00:12:35,047 [Dennis] Griselda! Griselda, my angel! 201 00:12:35,923 --> 00:12:37,508 [man] Go away. We're eating. 202 00:12:37,591 --> 00:12:38,801 [Dennis] Is Griselda there? 203 00:12:38,884 --> 00:12:41,303 - [Fishfinger] Is that Dennis Cooper? - Uh, yes, sir. 204 00:12:41,387 --> 00:12:43,973 - Can I speak to Griselda? - She's eating, Dennis. 205 00:12:44,056 --> 00:12:45,072 What do you want? 206 00:12:45,097 --> 00:12:48,084 I'm going away, Mr. Fishfinger, to the city. 207 00:12:48,144 --> 00:12:51,605 I'm going to make good, come back and claim Griselda's hand. 208 00:12:51,689 --> 00:12:53,482 So you will, Dennis. Good-bye. 209 00:12:53,566 --> 00:12:55,484 [Fishfinger family grunting, munching, smacking] 210 00:12:55,568 --> 00:12:58,028 Griselda. Griselda, I'm going away. 211 00:12:58,112 --> 00:13:00,281 Say something. Say anything. 212 00:13:00,364 --> 00:13:01,866 [Griselda, with mouth full] Pass the potatoes. 213 00:13:01,949 --> 00:13:04,785 I heard that! You are in there, Griselda! 214 00:13:05,578 --> 00:13:08,164 My darling, I'm going away. I may not even see you... 215 00:13:08,247 --> 00:13:10,833 [Griselda retches] That's rotten! 216 00:13:12,585 --> 00:13:14,587 [family grunting, smacking] 217 00:13:14,670 --> 00:13:16,630 For me? 218 00:13:16,714 --> 00:13:18,257 Griselda, you do care. 219 00:13:18,340 --> 00:13:20,468 A keepsake. 220 00:13:20,551 --> 00:13:23,137 Something that will always remind me of you. 221 00:13:23,220 --> 00:13:27,099 Oh, Griselda, I'll carry this next to my heart until the day when we next... 222 00:13:27,183 --> 00:13:29,185 [Fishfinger] Say good-bye to the boy, Grissy. 223 00:13:29,268 --> 00:13:31,770 [Griselda grunting, farting] 224 00:13:31,854 --> 00:13:33,481 Meet. 225 00:13:41,447 --> 00:13:43,199 Good-bye, Griselda. 226 00:14:20,653 --> 00:14:22,071 [man exhales] 227 00:14:23,364 --> 00:14:26,283 [whimpers, shouts] No, no! 228 00:14:26,367 --> 00:14:30,287 [grunting] Stay away! Stay away from me! [groans] No! 229 00:14:32,998 --> 00:14:36,210 No! [grunting] 230 00:14:36,293 --> 00:14:38,462 [gasping] 231 00:14:38,546 --> 00:14:41,340 [grunting, coughing] 232 00:14:41,423 --> 00:14:43,259 [snoring] 233 00:14:52,434 --> 00:14:54,103 [sighs] 234 00:14:54,186 --> 00:14:56,021 [snoring continues] 235 00:14:56,105 --> 00:14:58,732 What's that? What's that? 236 00:14:58,816 --> 00:15:01,986 - No! Aaah! Aaah! - [sniffing] 237 00:15:02,069 --> 00:15:04,822 - [grunting continues] - Ahh. 238 00:15:04,905 --> 00:15:07,783 [snoring continues] 239 00:15:13,414 --> 00:15:15,374 [shouting, whimpering] 240 00:15:15,457 --> 00:15:17,626 Good morning, Your Majesty. 241 00:15:18,586 --> 00:15:20,337 [sighs, chuckles] 242 00:15:20,421 --> 00:15:22,339 Good morning, Passelewe. 243 00:15:22,423 --> 00:15:25,968 - Good morning to you, sir! - And to you, sir! A fine day! 244 00:15:26,051 --> 00:15:28,762 Truly. Your business goes well, I trust. 245 00:15:28,846 --> 00:15:31,765 One doesn't like to complain. And your own commercial efforts? 246 00:15:31,849 --> 00:15:34,143 Oh-ho! One does one's best, you know. 247 00:15:34,226 --> 00:15:36,312 I understand you're opening a new shop. 248 00:15:36,395 --> 00:15:39,315 Yes, down by the town gate. It's an area of considerable growth. 249 00:15:39,398 --> 00:15:42,776 Oh, I agree. I trust we'll be hearing from you with an order soon. 250 00:15:42,860 --> 00:15:45,779 Oh, certainly. That is, if your prices are as competitive as they were. 251 00:15:45,863 --> 00:15:47,573 Ah, surely. 252 00:15:47,656 --> 00:15:49,616 By the way, what's the latest wine-to-water ratio? 253 00:15:49,658 --> 00:15:52,258 - Did you see it this morning? - It came just as I left the house. 254 00:15:52,286 --> 00:15:55,581 It's two wine to one water still, but I don't see how it can hold at that rate. 255 00:15:55,664 --> 00:15:58,042 They're very lucky to be getting any wine at all, you know. 256 00:15:58,125 --> 00:16:02,963 Is that all? I thought I detected a certain wanness in the last consignment you sent me. 257 00:16:03,047 --> 00:16:06,216 Oh, that's odd. It was very robust when it left my premises. 258 00:16:06,300 --> 00:16:07,968 Get a move on. 259 00:16:08,052 --> 00:16:11,388 Let me send you a sample of our new shipment of port with my compliments. 260 00:16:11,472 --> 00:16:13,098 [whispers] Move it, you lame buggers. 261 00:16:13,182 --> 00:16:15,100 That would be most kind of you. 262 00:16:15,184 --> 00:16:17,394 Why do you suppose the king has called this council? 263 00:16:17,478 --> 00:16:20,105 Only the Lord knows... Get going, you. 264 00:16:20,189 --> 00:16:23,709 But I have heard that the chamberlain is urging him to take measures against the monster. 265 00:16:23,734 --> 00:16:27,112 Measures? That would allow the peasants to leave the city? 266 00:16:27,196 --> 00:16:29,990 It could very well be. And that would not be good for business. 267 00:16:30,074 --> 00:16:31,617 Move it, you slugs! Move! 268 00:16:31,700 --> 00:16:35,120 - Come on! - Get a move on! 269 00:16:35,204 --> 00:16:37,498 - Come on! Move! - [peasants gasping] 270 00:16:37,581 --> 00:16:40,084 Come on! Move it! 271 00:16:44,296 --> 00:16:47,341 [groaning] 272 00:16:47,424 --> 00:16:49,802 Dig in! Come on! 273 00:16:49,885 --> 00:16:52,888 - Stop! - [peasants gasping, wheezing] 274 00:17:03,315 --> 00:17:05,609 - After you. - No, you first. Please. 275 00:17:05,693 --> 00:17:07,111 You're too kind. 276 00:17:10,447 --> 00:17:13,784 [man coughing] 277 00:17:21,041 --> 00:17:24,044 [coughing continues] 278 00:17:56,326 --> 00:17:59,538 - [banging on floor] - [man] Attention! 279 00:17:59,621 --> 00:18:01,623 Your Most Glorious Majesty, 280 00:18:01,707 --> 00:18:04,168 King Bruno the Questionable... 281 00:18:10,382 --> 00:18:14,428 son of Olaf the Loud. 282 00:18:14,511 --> 00:18:17,055 Oh! he's coming! H-He's coming! 283 00:18:17,139 --> 00:18:20,934 - [woman] I'm not finished yet. - Oh, look out! He's here! 284 00:18:21,018 --> 00:18:22,770 - Oh! Aah! - [man groans] 285 00:18:22,853 --> 00:18:25,856 [fanfare playing] 286 00:18:27,274 --> 00:18:29,401 Your Majesty. 287 00:18:29,485 --> 00:18:31,528 Do pay attention, Your Majesty. 288 00:18:31,612 --> 00:18:34,823 Surely you must see it's a matter of the gravest urgency. 289 00:18:34,907 --> 00:18:37,785 - Yes. Yes, of course, Passelewe. - [guard] Jesus Christ! 290 00:18:40,120 --> 00:18:42,372 - Quick, sire, down! - [grunting] 291 00:18:46,418 --> 00:18:48,504 - Stop it! - [man groans] 292 00:18:50,130 --> 00:18:52,174 - Go on. - [grunting] 293 00:18:54,426 --> 00:18:56,011 Bless my soul. 294 00:18:56,094 --> 00:19:01,058 Great-grand-nephew 295 00:19:01,141 --> 00:19:03,894 of Emperor Otto the Bent... 296 00:19:05,896 --> 00:19:08,982 conqueror... 297 00:19:10,901 --> 00:19:12,402 of Freedonia. 298 00:19:12,486 --> 00:19:15,280 - [King Bruno] Let him go! - Get up, man. 299 00:19:15,364 --> 00:19:18,951 Silly thing. You'll get your rags all dirty. 300 00:19:20,160 --> 00:19:22,955 Sire. Help us, sire. 301 00:19:23,038 --> 00:19:25,707 The monster is ravaging the countryside. 302 00:19:25,791 --> 00:19:28,168 It has destroyed our homes. 303 00:19:28,252 --> 00:19:30,379 W-We haven't eaten in days. 304 00:19:30,462 --> 00:19:31,964 - Weeks. - Months. 305 00:19:32,047 --> 00:19:34,258 E-Except I et my shoe yesterday. 306 00:19:34,341 --> 00:19:39,680 Oh, that's nothin'. I et three toes off of my, um... right foot. 307 00:19:39,763 --> 00:19:42,724 - Terrible monster which... - That ain't your right foot. 308 00:19:42,808 --> 00:19:45,310 Know-it-all. Are you a doctor or summat? 309 00:19:45,394 --> 00:19:47,729 - But please... - I saw a doctor once. 310 00:19:47,813 --> 00:19:50,649 He didn't see me. I was hiding. 311 00:19:50,732 --> 00:19:52,901 Y-Your Majesty, 312 00:19:52,985 --> 00:19:55,320 save us from the great, green beast. 313 00:19:55,404 --> 00:19:58,323 - Gray! - The side I saw was a dirty yellow. 314 00:19:58,407 --> 00:20:01,326 - No, it were more orange-y. - No, it was gray! 315 00:20:01,410 --> 00:20:04,121 [all arguing] 316 00:20:05,038 --> 00:20:06,832 What... Now stop it. 317 00:20:07,833 --> 00:20:10,586 Stop it, all of you! Go on, get out, get out, get out. 318 00:20:10,669 --> 00:20:13,171 What are you doing? Go on, get out. 319 00:20:13,255 --> 00:20:15,549 - I'll read this to the king. - [arguing continues] 320 00:20:15,632 --> 00:20:17,843 [guard] Stop it! Go on! 321 00:20:20,012 --> 00:20:21,930 You know, it seems to me, Passelewe, 322 00:20:22,014 --> 00:20:24,766 that my subjects are becoming a pain in the arse. 323 00:20:24,850 --> 00:20:27,477 Yes, well, my dear, you must do something. 324 00:20:27,561 --> 00:20:29,980 I mean, your kingdom is paralyzed with fear. 325 00:20:30,063 --> 00:20:32,107 The city below is overflowing with refugees. 326 00:20:32,190 --> 00:20:34,109 I mean, they're simple people, Bruno, 327 00:20:34,192 --> 00:20:37,195 and easy prey for every sharp-witted merchant and trickster. 328 00:20:37,279 --> 00:20:39,406 Past Grand Master, Royal Order of Lowndes, 329 00:20:39,489 --> 00:20:41,658 Victor, Savior of Wales. 330 00:20:41,742 --> 00:20:43,327 - [trumpet fanfare] - [coughs] 331 00:20:44,369 --> 00:20:46,496 - Hey! - Thank you. 332 00:20:46,580 --> 00:20:49,833 [fanfare continues] 333 00:20:51,460 --> 00:20:54,171 [coughing] 334 00:21:00,427 --> 00:21:04,264 [fanfare concludes] 335 00:21:08,435 --> 00:21:13,023 Your Majesty, your council meets today in solemn session 336 00:21:13,106 --> 00:21:18,153 to urgently discuss the terrible havoc wreaked by the monster 337 00:21:18,236 --> 00:21:20,155 all over the countryside. 338 00:21:20,238 --> 00:21:22,199 Look, I'm telling ya, 339 00:21:22,282 --> 00:21:24,743 nobody gets in here without money or possessions. 340 00:21:24,826 --> 00:21:26,370 But I've got possessions. 341 00:21:26,453 --> 00:21:29,081 - See? - Ah, that's only a rock. 342 00:21:29,164 --> 00:21:30,874 - Only a rock? - Yeah. 343 00:21:30,958 --> 00:21:34,753 Listen. What if this is not just an ordinary rock? 344 00:21:34,836 --> 00:21:38,173 What if this is a diamond? 345 00:21:38,256 --> 00:21:40,884 It don't shine. Now get outta here! 346 00:21:40,968 --> 00:21:43,220 Get outta here! Get outta here! 347 00:21:43,303 --> 00:21:46,223 - Right. Next. What have you got? - [blows landing, man screaming] 348 00:21:46,306 --> 00:21:48,809 - Any grain? Any cloth? - [screaming continues] 349 00:21:48,892 --> 00:21:50,560 Uh, no, I haven't got anything, really. 350 00:21:50,644 --> 00:21:52,598 But it's very important that I get in the city. 351 00:21:52,623 --> 00:21:54,088 Yeah, that's what they all say. 352 00:21:54,147 --> 00:21:56,107 - Now, move along. - No, no, you don't understand. 353 00:21:56,149 --> 00:21:58,652 I've come to get a job. I'm starting all over again. 354 00:21:58,735 --> 00:22:01,405 I've got lots of good ideas, and I think that once in there I could... 355 00:22:01,488 --> 00:22:03,490 Now, look, sonny. Shove off, eh? 356 00:22:03,573 --> 00:22:06,410 Wait a minute. What have you got here? 357 00:22:06,493 --> 00:22:08,161 What's this? 358 00:22:09,246 --> 00:22:11,790 You told us you had nothing. 359 00:22:11,873 --> 00:22:14,209 - Cor! - That's not for eating. 360 00:22:14,292 --> 00:22:17,587 What do you mean? You could last for a week on that. 361 00:22:18,755 --> 00:22:21,842 Just a minute. What are you up to, sonny? 362 00:22:21,925 --> 00:22:23,969 Oh, nothing, nothing. It's a memento. 363 00:22:24,761 --> 00:22:25,971 A memento? 364 00:22:27,431 --> 00:22:29,433 My sweetheart gave it to me before I left home. 365 00:22:29,516 --> 00:22:31,852 She gave you that? 366 00:22:31,935 --> 00:22:34,688 Yes. Can I have it back, please? 367 00:22:35,564 --> 00:22:38,275 Gosh, she must really love you. 368 00:22:38,358 --> 00:22:40,569 - Do you really think so? - Yeah. 369 00:22:40,652 --> 00:22:44,823 I've got a sort of sticky feeling inside me just thinking of it. 370 00:22:44,906 --> 00:22:46,742 You sure are a lucky guy. 371 00:22:46,825 --> 00:22:48,785 Come on, Fred, cut it out! 372 00:22:48,869 --> 00:22:51,121 - He's not getting in. - I've got to! 373 00:22:51,204 --> 00:22:53,832 - Give him a break. Just this once. - No chance. 374 00:22:53,915 --> 00:22:55,250 Now push off, you. 375 00:22:55,333 --> 00:22:58,336 [onlookers muttering, chuckling] 376 00:23:03,258 --> 00:23:05,052 Just 'cause he's got a potato... 377 00:23:05,135 --> 00:23:08,180 Look, I'm telling you, that's what they all say. 378 00:23:08,263 --> 00:23:10,557 Wait a minute. Hey, you! 379 00:23:12,225 --> 00:23:13,435 Come back! 380 00:23:17,981 --> 00:23:19,191 That's far enough! 381 00:23:21,610 --> 00:23:24,154 Let's have a look at your legs. 382 00:23:32,037 --> 00:23:35,040 [onlookers chuckling] 383 00:23:40,212 --> 00:23:41,296 [both] No. 384 00:23:41,379 --> 00:23:43,381 - [onlookers chattering] - Next! 385 00:23:49,054 --> 00:23:50,889 [Passelewe] And so, Your Majesty, 386 00:23:50,972 --> 00:23:56,061 your great-great-great-great-great-grandfather, 387 00:23:56,144 --> 00:23:58,480 King Max the Vainglorious, 388 00:23:58,563 --> 00:24:00,107 by a tournament 389 00:24:00,190 --> 00:24:05,320 chose from his knights a champion to free the kingdom from the pestilence. 390 00:24:05,403 --> 00:24:09,699 "Mounted on his mighty charger, Sir Bromiades waged ..." 391 00:24:09,783 --> 00:24:11,827 [King Bruno grunting] 392 00:24:15,956 --> 00:24:17,916 What's that? 393 00:24:17,999 --> 00:24:20,877 Quickly, man. Somebody might be trying to poison me. 394 00:24:25,382 --> 00:24:27,259 Plaster, Your Majesty. 395 00:24:27,342 --> 00:24:29,886 Oh. Carry on, Passelewe. 396 00:24:29,970 --> 00:24:33,265 - "Mounted on his, uh, 11th ..." - Wait. 397 00:24:34,599 --> 00:24:36,810 - "Mounted on his mighty ..." - No, wait. 398 00:24:36,893 --> 00:24:39,062 - Twelfth century, I think. - Shut up! 399 00:24:40,147 --> 00:24:43,191 Fool. Carry on, Passelewe. 400 00:24:43,275 --> 00:24:47,154 "Until peace was once more restored to the kingdom. 401 00:24:47,237 --> 00:24:51,324 With that, King Max rode back to the cheers of his subjects, 402 00:24:51,408 --> 00:24:54,077 who lined the road for over 50 miles." 403 00:24:54,703 --> 00:24:56,454 Fifty miles? 404 00:24:56,538 --> 00:24:59,291 You mean they cheered him all that way? 405 00:24:59,374 --> 00:25:01,001 Wow. 406 00:25:01,084 --> 00:25:03,712 They certainly must have respected him. 407 00:25:04,921 --> 00:25:08,049 You're right, Passelewe. We'll hold a tournament. 408 00:25:08,133 --> 00:25:12,512 It's years since we heard the clash of sword against shield, 409 00:25:12,596 --> 00:25:16,474 the clamor of mightily armored knights crashing to the ground, 410 00:25:16,558 --> 00:25:21,479 the spurt of blood as the dagger is thrust into unprotected groin. 411 00:25:21,563 --> 00:25:23,315 - [King Bruno chuckling] - Oh, no. 412 00:25:23,398 --> 00:25:25,233 Oh, no, dear. No, no, no, no. 413 00:25:25,317 --> 00:25:29,696 What I had in mind was a... was a tournament à plaisance. 414 00:25:31,198 --> 00:25:33,283 À plaisance? 415 00:25:33,366 --> 00:25:37,454 Passelewe, do my ear holes hear right? 416 00:25:37,537 --> 00:25:42,083 À plaisance, with blunted sword and collared lance? 417 00:25:42,167 --> 00:25:44,753 [indignant chuckle] Where's the honor in that? 418 00:25:44,836 --> 00:25:48,965 Where's the glory in a bunch of buffoons playing pillow fights, eh? 419 00:25:49,049 --> 00:25:53,053 No, it must be l'outrance. 420 00:25:53,136 --> 00:25:54,387 To the death. 421 00:25:54,471 --> 00:25:57,515 - Please, Bruno, please. - No, no, no. 422 00:25:57,599 --> 00:26:00,727 Go with all speed and make the arrangements. 423 00:26:00,810 --> 00:26:04,356 [chuckles] I can't wait to tell the princess. 424 00:26:16,993 --> 00:26:19,162 Daughter? 425 00:26:19,829 --> 00:26:23,416 Still working hard, I see. [chuckles] 426 00:26:23,500 --> 00:26:27,337 You and the blessed sisters of misery. [chuckles] 427 00:26:27,420 --> 00:26:28,630 Well... 428 00:26:29,798 --> 00:26:31,633 what are you making, Daughter? 429 00:26:31,716 --> 00:26:36,388 A tapestry, Father, depicting the famous siege of Castle Apcadwallader. 430 00:26:36,471 --> 00:26:38,098 See? 431 00:26:38,181 --> 00:26:41,434 In this portion, the king is eating his horse 432 00:26:41,518 --> 00:26:43,728 on the 98th day of the siege. 433 00:26:43,812 --> 00:26:46,231 - [both laughing] - Splendid! 434 00:26:47,649 --> 00:26:50,193 Very pretty, Daughter. Yes, but you were always... 435 00:26:52,153 --> 00:26:55,657 Careful, Father. Sister Winnet fell out last week. 436 00:26:58,326 --> 00:27:02,831 Daughter, our kingdom will soon be free of the monster. 437 00:27:02,914 --> 00:27:06,835 I have declared a tournament to find a champion to destroy it. 438 00:27:06,918 --> 00:27:08,878 What, the kingdom? 439 00:27:08,962 --> 00:27:11,423 Oh, no, of course not, silly. No, the monster. 440 00:27:12,132 --> 00:27:14,217 Oh! I see. 441 00:27:14,301 --> 00:27:16,094 Yes, and not only that, 442 00:27:16,177 --> 00:27:19,681 but the successful knight will win your hand in marriage. 443 00:27:20,724 --> 00:27:22,559 - Marriage? - [chuckles] 444 00:27:22,642 --> 00:27:26,855 - [thunder rumbling] - Yes, well, you want to be married, surely? 445 00:27:26,938 --> 00:27:28,940 - Of course I do, Daddy. - Well, then... 446 00:27:29,024 --> 00:27:32,902 But I want to marry a prince. I'm supposed to marry a prince. 447 00:27:32,986 --> 00:27:36,614 That's why I wait in this tower, just like all the books say to do. 448 00:27:37,324 --> 00:27:39,951 Are any of the contestants princes? 449 00:27:41,953 --> 00:27:44,581 Well, not exactly. 450 00:27:45,707 --> 00:27:47,042 - No? - No. 451 00:27:47,125 --> 00:27:49,961 - But I could make one a prince, couldn't I? - [sobbing] No. 452 00:27:50,045 --> 00:27:52,505 - No, I mean, the winner. - It's not the same. 453 00:27:52,589 --> 00:27:55,050 No, not really. 454 00:27:56,051 --> 00:27:57,552 Ah, well, never mind. 455 00:27:57,635 --> 00:27:59,387 Once the monster is destroyed, 456 00:27:59,471 --> 00:28:02,766 I will build you a beautiful bridal suite 457 00:28:02,849 --> 00:28:04,976 in the lovely West Tower. 458 00:28:15,945 --> 00:28:18,114 On second thought, 459 00:28:18,198 --> 00:28:23,203 I think the view from the lovely East Tower would be infinitely more preferable. 460 00:28:23,286 --> 00:28:25,955 - Hmm? - [monster screeching] 461 00:28:26,998 --> 00:28:30,001 [screeching continues] 462 00:29:00,907 --> 00:29:03,910 [coughing, chattering] 463 00:29:10,291 --> 00:29:12,710 - Who is it? - Uh, excuse me. 464 00:29:12,794 --> 00:29:14,170 Watch him. Watch him. 465 00:29:14,254 --> 00:29:16,673 I wonder if I could have some of your soup? 466 00:29:16,756 --> 00:29:19,384 - [chattering continues] - He's after our soup. 467 00:29:19,467 --> 00:29:21,177 - Somebody stop him! - Poke a hole in 'im! 468 00:29:22,637 --> 00:29:24,389 - I'll do anything. - Anything? 469 00:29:24,472 --> 00:29:27,517 - Will he gather firewood? - I don't know. What do you think? 470 00:29:27,600 --> 00:29:29,686 I think we should poke a hole in 'im. 471 00:29:29,769 --> 00:29:33,314 I'll collect some firewood for you if you let me have some of your soup. 472 00:29:33,398 --> 00:29:35,191 Where do I get it from? 473 00:29:35,275 --> 00:29:37,152 [murmuring, hissing] 474 00:29:38,528 --> 00:29:40,822 [monster roaring] 475 00:29:44,284 --> 00:29:45,994 Ah. 476 00:29:46,077 --> 00:29:47,537 Oh. Um... 477 00:29:49,956 --> 00:29:54,127 Well... could I have a little taste of the soup first, just to see if I like it? 478 00:29:54,210 --> 00:29:56,629 - [all grumbling] - No, I thought not. 479 00:29:59,757 --> 00:30:01,759 Well, I'd better go then. 480 00:30:01,843 --> 00:30:04,095 - The firewood, was it? - [grumbling, coughing] 481 00:30:04,179 --> 00:30:06,681 Uh... yes. 482 00:30:10,852 --> 00:30:13,855 [thunder rumbling] 483 00:30:32,415 --> 00:30:34,417 [bird shrieking] 484 00:30:55,980 --> 00:30:58,066 [both shriek, gasp] 485 00:30:59,108 --> 00:31:01,694 So, you've discovered my diamond mine, have you? 486 00:31:01,778 --> 00:31:03,988 - No. I was just gathering firewood. - Liar! 487 00:31:04,072 --> 00:31:06,199 It's the diamonds you're after, isn't it? 488 00:31:06,282 --> 00:31:08,284 These are not diamonds. They're just rocks. 489 00:31:08,368 --> 00:31:09,536 Just rocks? 490 00:31:12,163 --> 00:31:13,623 Quick thinking. 491 00:31:13,706 --> 00:31:16,125 But not quick enough to save your skin. 492 00:31:16,209 --> 00:31:19,796 The secret of my diamond mine dies with you! 493 00:31:19,879 --> 00:31:22,549 [Dennis shouting, groaning] 494 00:31:24,801 --> 00:31:29,097 - [screams] - [monster shrieking] 495 00:31:29,180 --> 00:31:32,183 [roaring] 496 00:31:40,275 --> 00:31:43,403 [gasping, whimpering] 497 00:31:44,445 --> 00:31:47,365 - [monster shrieking] - [gasping, chattering] 498 00:31:50,201 --> 00:31:53,788 - [old man] Oh, shit. Oh, shit. - [chattering] 499 00:31:53,871 --> 00:31:57,417 I just dropped in to tell you to, uh, start without me. 500 00:31:59,043 --> 00:32:02,213 - Perhaps another night. - [murmuring, grumbling] 501 00:32:08,511 --> 00:32:11,514 [rooster crowing] 502 00:32:13,891 --> 00:32:15,518 [snoring] 503 00:32:15,602 --> 00:32:17,604 [grunting] 504 00:32:21,566 --> 00:32:22,650 Huh? 505 00:32:25,862 --> 00:32:27,989 [groaning] 506 00:32:28,072 --> 00:32:29,324 [spits] 507 00:32:29,407 --> 00:32:32,452 [urinating] 508 00:32:37,540 --> 00:32:39,083 [door lock slides] 509 00:32:41,461 --> 00:32:42,879 Huh? 510 00:32:46,591 --> 00:32:49,719 [muttering] 511 00:32:54,265 --> 00:32:56,476 [guard grunting] 512 00:32:58,978 --> 00:33:01,981 [grunting continues, intensifies] 513 00:33:04,150 --> 00:33:08,404 [gasps] Hey! Hey! Oi! Oi! Hold on there! 514 00:33:08,488 --> 00:33:10,907 - [pounding on door] - Open up! Open the door! 515 00:33:10,990 --> 00:33:13,076 Open it up! Open up in there! 516 00:33:13,159 --> 00:33:16,079 Oi! Open it! Open the door! 517 00:33:17,038 --> 00:33:18,956 Open the door! 518 00:34:01,999 --> 00:34:04,752 [bell clanging] 519 00:34:04,836 --> 00:34:06,713 Rush hour! 520 00:34:06,796 --> 00:34:09,632 - [bell tolling] - [shouting, chattering] 521 00:34:25,648 --> 00:34:29,569 [cymbal clanging] 522 00:34:32,488 --> 00:34:35,324 Harken, before it is too late! 523 00:34:35,408 --> 00:34:37,160 Prepare! 524 00:34:37,952 --> 00:34:41,873 Cleanse yourselves! The beast is at the gates! 525 00:34:41,956 --> 00:34:43,958 - [groaning] - Prepare yourselves! 526 00:34:45,251 --> 00:34:47,587 The beast is at the gates! 527 00:34:49,714 --> 00:34:51,549 Cleanse yourselves! 528 00:34:53,384 --> 00:34:55,136 [laughing] 529 00:34:55,219 --> 00:34:56,721 Prepare! 530 00:34:56,804 --> 00:34:59,640 The beast is at the gates! 531 00:35:00,725 --> 00:35:03,269 Cleanse yourselves! 532 00:35:04,061 --> 00:35:07,023 All citizens, listen to me! 533 00:35:07,106 --> 00:35:09,400 - Yeah, you better listen! - [all shouting] 534 00:35:09,484 --> 00:35:11,277 You'd better bloody listen! 535 00:35:12,111 --> 00:35:14,989 - Are you listening up? - Listen up! Listen up! 536 00:35:15,072 --> 00:35:16,824 You'd better listen up! 537 00:35:16,908 --> 00:35:18,868 Shut up! 538 00:35:18,951 --> 00:35:21,788 - [shouting quiets, chattering] - You never listen. 539 00:35:21,871 --> 00:35:24,832 - Sin! - [all chattering] Sin! Sin! 540 00:35:24,916 --> 00:35:26,959 Yes, the bristling spikes of the pondylus. 541 00:35:27,043 --> 00:35:28,085 The pondylus! 542 00:35:28,169 --> 00:35:30,254 The pointed crests of the dactylopters. 543 00:35:30,338 --> 00:35:31,589 The dactylopters! 544 00:35:31,672 --> 00:35:33,716 - The trigla. - The trigla! 545 00:35:33,800 --> 00:35:35,885 ♪ And the flying hogfish ♪ 546 00:35:35,968 --> 00:35:39,138 ♪ And the flying hogfish ♪ 547 00:35:39,222 --> 00:35:45,019 Are as nothing compared to the beast that holds us prisoner! 548 00:35:45,102 --> 00:35:47,438 The beast that... 549 00:35:47,522 --> 00:35:49,065 Flying hogfish? 550 00:35:51,067 --> 00:35:53,653 I seen a gliding hogfish once. 551 00:35:53,736 --> 00:35:55,655 Never flying. 552 00:35:55,738 --> 00:35:57,490 Not actually flying. 553 00:36:01,953 --> 00:36:06,499 [shouting, chattering] 554 00:36:10,545 --> 00:36:12,171 [man] Cabbages. 555 00:36:13,297 --> 00:36:14,507 Cabbages. 556 00:36:14,590 --> 00:36:17,885 Rats killed, lady. All very tidy. 557 00:36:17,969 --> 00:36:19,637 All very quiet. 558 00:36:19,720 --> 00:36:21,264 - Morning. - Oh, morning. 559 00:36:21,347 --> 00:36:25,059 - I'm afraid I haven't got any money. - Oh. Oh, that's all right. 560 00:36:25,142 --> 00:36:27,937 Thank you, guv... Oh! Thank you. 561 00:36:28,688 --> 00:36:30,064 Thank you. 562 00:36:30,147 --> 00:36:31,732 Is that yours? 563 00:36:31,816 --> 00:36:33,609 Of course it is. 564 00:36:33,693 --> 00:36:35,486 Whose did you think it was? 565 00:36:36,237 --> 00:36:38,447 - You're new to the city? - Uh, yes. Yes. 566 00:36:38,531 --> 00:36:41,450 I came here from the country to start a new life here, get a job. 567 00:36:41,534 --> 00:36:44,328 A job? No chance, son. 568 00:36:44,412 --> 00:36:45,788 Oh, thank you, guv'nor. 569 00:36:45,872 --> 00:36:48,833 Well, surely there must be plenty of opportunities. 570 00:36:48,916 --> 00:36:51,335 - Morning. Thank you. - [coin drops in cup] 571 00:36:51,419 --> 00:36:53,713 I am a qualified cooper's apprentice. 572 00:36:54,755 --> 00:36:56,924 A cooper's apprentice. 573 00:36:57,008 --> 00:36:59,302 Well, what a coincidence. 574 00:36:59,385 --> 00:37:01,387 I'm a cooper myself. 575 00:37:01,470 --> 00:37:04,724 You may even have heard of me. Wat Dabney. 576 00:37:05,433 --> 00:37:07,435 Wat Dabney? 577 00:37:07,518 --> 00:37:09,645 Not the Wat Dabney. 578 00:37:09,729 --> 00:37:12,899 - The inventor of the inverted firkin? - The very same, lad. 579 00:37:12,982 --> 00:37:15,026 - Cor! - Now... 580 00:37:15,109 --> 00:37:18,321 if I can't get a job here, what chance have you got? 581 00:37:18,404 --> 00:37:20,031 Come here. Here. 582 00:37:21,449 --> 00:37:24,452 You see that plaque? There. Under the barrel. 583 00:37:24,535 --> 00:37:27,204 - [Dennis] Oh, yeah. - Well, that's a guild sign. 584 00:37:27,914 --> 00:37:30,666 To work there you've got to be a member of the guild. 585 00:37:31,584 --> 00:37:33,920 But you're not and I'm not. 586 00:37:34,003 --> 00:37:35,963 And not likely to be. 587 00:37:36,047 --> 00:37:37,381 But that's not fair. 588 00:37:37,465 --> 00:37:40,217 Fair or not, the guilds have this town sewn up. 589 00:37:40,301 --> 00:37:41,761 Morning. 590 00:37:41,844 --> 00:37:43,763 But what am I gonna do? 591 00:37:43,846 --> 00:37:47,099 Well, it's no good going round with a long face, is it? 592 00:37:47,183 --> 00:37:49,393 I did for weeks. Nearly starved. 593 00:37:49,477 --> 00:37:52,104 Then, only this morning I thought of this. 594 00:37:54,398 --> 00:37:56,025 - Hey. - [coin drops in cup] 595 00:37:57,068 --> 00:37:59,612 Maybe we could team up together. 596 00:38:00,738 --> 00:38:02,323 Sure. 597 00:38:02,406 --> 00:38:04,825 - All you gotta do is... - No. No, thank you. 598 00:38:04,909 --> 00:38:07,828 No, no, good-bye. I think it's a one-man business, really. 599 00:38:08,496 --> 00:38:12,083 Well, what a golden chance he's missing. 600 00:38:12,166 --> 00:38:16,170 [horn blowing sour notes] 601 00:38:41,612 --> 00:38:44,448 Attention! Attention, ladies and gentlemen! 602 00:38:44,532 --> 00:38:47,159 - Your attention, please! - [staff tapping on platform] 603 00:38:47,243 --> 00:38:51,872 "In my humble capacity as herald to His Magn... 604 00:38:52,331 --> 00:38:53,749 Magnificence, 605 00:38:53,833 --> 00:38:56,335 King Bruno the Questionable... 606 00:38:58,004 --> 00:39:00,881 it is my privilege to announce... 607 00:39:00,965 --> 00:39:03,217 [horn blowing sour notes] 608 00:39:06,554 --> 00:39:07,763 A joost ..." 609 00:39:09,348 --> 00:39:11,183 Sorry. "A joust... 610 00:39:12,476 --> 00:39:13,519 to the death 611 00:39:13,978 --> 00:39:16,814 to choose a... champion... 612 00:39:16,897 --> 00:39:20,151 - [horn blowing sour, screeching notes] - champion to free the country... 613 00:39:20,234 --> 00:39:25,156 to... to free the country from the torments of the ..." 614 00:39:28,784 --> 00:39:30,619 Excuse me. Um... please? 615 00:39:31,662 --> 00:39:32,872 Thank you very much. 616 00:39:39,670 --> 00:39:43,382 "As a reward for killing the monster, 617 00:39:43,466 --> 00:39:46,886 the king's champion will receive 618 00:39:46,969 --> 00:39:51,682 half the princess's hand and the entire kingdom in marriage." 619 00:39:53,017 --> 00:39:55,019 [whispering] 620 00:39:56,020 --> 00:39:58,647 Correction. It is, of course... 621 00:39:58,731 --> 00:40:02,735 It is, of course, the king's hand and half the princess's kingdom. 622 00:40:03,903 --> 00:40:05,696 [whispering] 623 00:40:05,780 --> 00:40:07,198 Excuse me. 624 00:40:07,281 --> 00:40:09,366 - [whispering continues] - Yes. Yes. 625 00:40:10,367 --> 00:40:12,953 Yes. Yes, I see. Thank you. Thank you. 626 00:40:13,037 --> 00:40:16,582 I've just received final confirmation of the final terms. 627 00:40:16,665 --> 00:40:19,585 It is, of course, the princess's hand 628 00:40:19,668 --> 00:40:22,963 and half the entire kingdom. 629 00:40:36,227 --> 00:40:39,188 [cheering, shouting] 630 00:40:43,359 --> 00:40:45,402 [no audible dialogue] 631 00:40:47,780 --> 00:40:52,660 [fanfare playing] 632 00:41:18,310 --> 00:41:21,313 [horn blowing sour notes] 633 00:41:34,994 --> 00:41:36,996 [crowd quiets] 634 00:42:17,286 --> 00:42:21,081 [man] Beware the Jabberwock, my son. 635 00:42:21,165 --> 00:42:23,584 - Cabbages. Cabbages. - The jaws that bite. 636 00:42:23,667 --> 00:42:25,669 - The claws that catch. - Could I have one for nothing? 637 00:42:25,753 --> 00:42:27,296 [merchant] Go on. Get off. 638 00:42:27,379 --> 00:42:31,383 - [fanfare playing] - [blowing sour notes] 639 00:42:53,197 --> 00:42:55,199 [murmuring, chattering] 640 00:42:59,453 --> 00:43:02,498 [horse whinnying] 641 00:43:30,567 --> 00:43:32,486 [crowd cheering] 642 00:43:52,047 --> 00:43:54,049 [all gasping] 643 00:44:11,984 --> 00:44:15,612 Hot roasted rats! Only a farthing! 644 00:44:16,238 --> 00:44:17,656 Rats on a stick! 645 00:44:17,740 --> 00:44:21,035 In a very short time one of you is going to be the lucky owner of this egg! 646 00:44:21,118 --> 00:44:23,495 Get 'em hot! 647 00:44:23,579 --> 00:44:25,831 There you are, sonny. Off you go then. 648 00:44:27,082 --> 00:44:30,461 Get your rats! Only a farthing! 649 00:44:30,544 --> 00:44:34,131 Turnips. Turnips. Get your tur... Get your turnips here. 650 00:44:34,214 --> 00:44:37,051 Turnips. Turnips. Get your turnips. 651 00:44:51,357 --> 00:44:55,361 [crowd continues cheering] 652 00:44:58,864 --> 00:45:00,282 I want it! 653 00:45:05,037 --> 00:45:07,873 - [loud crash] - [Dennis yelps] 654 00:45:09,625 --> 00:45:12,252 [Dennis gasping, panting] 655 00:45:12,336 --> 00:45:14,713 [shouting] 656 00:45:14,797 --> 00:45:16,840 Jesus Christ! 657 00:45:19,968 --> 00:45:22,763 I'm awfully sorry. I only wanted a bite of turnip. 658 00:45:22,846 --> 00:45:24,515 Just keep walking. 659 00:45:25,557 --> 00:45:29,770 Oh! Hold up one minute, sir. I'll have you out in two shakes. 660 00:45:29,853 --> 00:45:31,480 I'm on it, really. 661 00:45:35,109 --> 00:45:36,735 How about that, then? 662 00:45:36,819 --> 00:45:40,739 First-class service as advertised. Don't forget. Tell your friends. 663 00:45:45,077 --> 00:45:48,038 - Where do you want it? - Over there by the burnishing pit. 664 00:45:48,122 --> 00:45:50,207 [man] Over there by the burnishing pit! 665 00:45:50,290 --> 00:45:52,334 I suppose you want this lot due in today? 666 00:45:52,418 --> 00:45:54,336 What happened? A tree fall on him? 667 00:45:54,420 --> 00:45:56,630 [laughs] 668 00:45:57,673 --> 00:45:59,299 All right up there, are you? 669 00:46:01,885 --> 00:46:05,431 You the master armorer here? Just look at this arm brace. 670 00:46:05,514 --> 00:46:07,349 You call that workmanship? 671 00:46:07,433 --> 00:46:09,893 - I can't do... - And look at this damned bar! 672 00:46:09,977 --> 00:46:12,688 - What's wrong with it? - [loud grinding] 673 00:46:12,771 --> 00:46:14,815 You can't please some people. They want miracles. 674 00:46:14,898 --> 00:46:18,152 - I said the best Italian armor. - Yes, but them arm braces I sent for... 675 00:46:18,235 --> 00:46:21,780 I don't want to hear it. You said Friday afternoon. 676 00:46:21,864 --> 00:46:24,704 - And to me that means Friday afternoon! - [armorer] Don't be impatient. 677 00:46:24,783 --> 00:46:28,412 - I put three of my best men on the job. - No good! No good! 678 00:46:28,495 --> 00:46:30,706 - Here... - Get back! 679 00:46:30,789 --> 00:46:32,666 Come on, boys. Come on. 680 00:46:34,460 --> 00:46:36,545 And don't bother sending a bill either. 681 00:46:51,477 --> 00:46:52,769 Excuse me. 682 00:46:57,483 --> 00:47:00,068 Excuse me! I couldn't help noticing... 683 00:47:00,152 --> 00:47:01,612 Get outta here! 684 00:47:03,530 --> 00:47:06,366 I couldn't help noticing that you could increase your efficiency 685 00:47:06,450 --> 00:47:08,076 if you moved your box to here. 686 00:47:08,660 --> 00:47:11,455 [screams] 687 00:47:13,540 --> 00:47:15,459 [groaning] 688 00:47:16,919 --> 00:47:19,421 [screaming] 689 00:47:20,631 --> 00:47:23,091 [workers shouting, screaming] 690 00:47:31,892 --> 00:47:34,853 [screaming continues] 691 00:47:54,164 --> 00:47:56,291 [cackling] Yeah! 692 00:47:57,376 --> 00:47:59,962 [cackling continues] 693 00:48:03,006 --> 00:48:04,967 [armorer] Clumsy idiot! 694 00:48:05,050 --> 00:48:07,553 - Come on. Let's get out of here. - I was just trying to improve his efficiency. 695 00:48:07,636 --> 00:48:10,389 - You did it beautifully. Beautiful! - What about him? 696 00:48:10,472 --> 00:48:13,600 Come on! I'll buy you a drink! 697 00:48:13,684 --> 00:48:15,686 We'll go to the Queen's Hemorrhoids, lad. 698 00:48:20,232 --> 00:48:22,651 - Mmm. - That better? 699 00:48:22,734 --> 00:48:23,986 Oh, yes. 700 00:48:24,069 --> 00:48:27,030 - I can't remember when I ate last. - Yes, I know. 701 00:48:27,114 --> 00:48:29,992 I once went without food for 147 days. 702 00:48:30,784 --> 00:48:32,244 147 days? 703 00:48:32,327 --> 00:48:34,913 Yeah, the winter of '52. The siege of Caerlaverock. 704 00:48:34,997 --> 00:48:38,500 Food was so short... What's the matter? You got a stomachache or something? 705 00:48:38,584 --> 00:48:42,546 Oh, no. No, no, I was just trying to work out what my next move would be, that's all. 706 00:48:42,629 --> 00:48:44,131 Yeah, so was I. 707 00:48:44,214 --> 00:48:46,633 What? Geez, why worry? 708 00:48:46,717 --> 00:48:48,343 But I've got to worry. 709 00:48:48,427 --> 00:48:51,471 It's a very big step coming from a small village to a big city like this. 710 00:48:51,555 --> 00:48:52,973 Don't I know! 711 00:48:53,056 --> 00:48:56,643 That's what attracted me to the life of a squire... the traveling. 712 00:48:56,727 --> 00:48:59,146 One day you're out in Hertford hunting heretics, 713 00:48:59,229 --> 00:49:03,358 the next day up in Scotland being burned at the stake. 714 00:49:03,442 --> 00:49:05,193 It's the adventure. 715 00:49:05,861 --> 00:49:07,779 Like the time me and my knights 716 00:49:07,863 --> 00:49:10,282 was fighting the Blessed Sisters of St. Alopecia. 717 00:49:10,365 --> 00:49:12,701 A band of warrior nuns. They really... 718 00:49:12,784 --> 00:49:16,163 It sounds very exciting, yes. But how secure is it? 719 00:49:16,246 --> 00:49:18,206 - Now, you take coopering. - Coopering? 720 00:49:18,290 --> 00:49:20,208 [laughs] Coopering! 721 00:49:20,292 --> 00:49:22,711 Hell, that's no life for a man! 722 00:49:22,794 --> 00:49:26,006 It is too! Barrels and casks are very important. 723 00:49:26,089 --> 00:49:27,966 - Now, in commerce... - Commerce? 724 00:49:28,842 --> 00:49:30,469 Rubbish! [spits] 725 00:49:30,552 --> 00:49:32,554 Now, you listen to me. 726 00:49:32,638 --> 00:49:34,806 My knight was wounded, see, 727 00:49:34,890 --> 00:49:37,059 and there was I with my back to the wall, 728 00:49:37,142 --> 00:49:40,520 two whacking great nuns coming at me with maces. 729 00:49:40,604 --> 00:49:43,204 Well, I hardly think fighting nuns is a very respectable way to... 730 00:49:43,231 --> 00:49:45,567 Here! I'll show you! Come here! 731 00:49:45,651 --> 00:49:48,362 There. You try. Come at me. Put up! 732 00:49:48,445 --> 00:49:50,739 - Pretend that drumstick is a mace. - I don't... 733 00:49:50,822 --> 00:49:52,908 Oh, come on. 734 00:49:53,533 --> 00:49:55,702 Really let me have it. Hmm? 735 00:49:55,786 --> 00:49:57,120 - Come on. - I can't. 736 00:49:57,204 --> 00:49:59,706 Go for me! Hyah! I deflected the mace! 737 00:49:59,790 --> 00:50:02,459 - [Dennis groaning] - [grunting] 738 00:50:02,542 --> 00:50:04,503 Then I grabbed her like this! 739 00:50:05,420 --> 00:50:07,506 - I want you to talk to the landlord for me. - What? 740 00:50:07,589 --> 00:50:10,050 Then I threw her again, like that! 741 00:50:10,926 --> 00:50:13,512 - I want you to distract him. - What for? 742 00:50:13,595 --> 00:50:16,848 You berk! She was tough, see. But I grabbed her in the old‒ 743 00:50:16,932 --> 00:50:18,684 - [Dennis] Ooh! - Just keep him talking. 744 00:50:18,767 --> 00:50:21,061 - I don't understand. - You will. 745 00:50:21,144 --> 00:50:23,522 Just do it! 746 00:50:23,605 --> 00:50:26,233 Now, here comes the best part. 747 00:50:26,316 --> 00:50:29,069 She broke my grip, see. She was coming in for the kill! 748 00:50:29,152 --> 00:50:31,238 - Aah! When... - [Dennis groans] 749 00:50:31,321 --> 00:50:35,826 I turned tail and ran for it, slamming shut the castle doors! 750 00:50:35,909 --> 00:50:37,202 I barred them with a lance! 751 00:50:37,285 --> 00:50:40,414 Grabbing one of the novices as a hostage... 752 00:50:40,497 --> 00:50:42,207 [murmuring] 753 00:50:42,290 --> 00:50:45,419 I fought my way up to the battlements, 754 00:50:45,502 --> 00:50:47,838 hacking and slashing as I went! 755 00:50:47,921 --> 00:50:50,590 Voilà! In tears! In cuts! 756 00:50:50,674 --> 00:50:52,843 [shouts, laughing] 757 00:50:52,926 --> 00:50:55,303 Easily outdistancing the enemy... 758 00:50:56,179 --> 00:50:57,639 I escaped. 759 00:51:00,934 --> 00:51:02,561 [muffled shout] 760 00:51:04,020 --> 00:51:07,065 [banging] 761 00:51:09,401 --> 00:51:12,904 [man grunting] 762 00:51:12,988 --> 00:51:15,157 What the bloody... Open this! Boy! 763 00:51:16,158 --> 00:51:19,077 Open it up! Open it up! 764 00:51:19,161 --> 00:51:21,496 Boy. [grunting] 765 00:51:23,039 --> 00:51:24,875 - [laughing, shouting] - What the bloody hell? 766 00:51:33,759 --> 00:51:35,886 All right, let's have a bit of decorum here. 767 00:51:35,969 --> 00:51:38,805 [laughing, shouting continue] 768 00:51:49,107 --> 00:51:52,569 - What do you want? - Uh, well, I was just wondering if, um... 769 00:51:52,652 --> 00:51:54,003 Well, speak up. I'm a busy man. 770 00:51:54,028 --> 00:51:56,222 Yes, that's what I wanted to talk to you about. 771 00:51:56,281 --> 00:51:59,951 Um, I used to be a cooper's apprentice, and I was, uh... 772 00:52:00,035 --> 00:52:02,788 All right, coming up right away. Well, what is it, boy? Spit it out. 773 00:52:02,871 --> 00:52:06,416 I j-just wondered whether you could tell me something about the inn-keeping business. 774 00:52:06,500 --> 00:52:09,002 - Is there a way to change trades... - What, now? 775 00:52:09,085 --> 00:52:13,048 [whimpering] Mr. Rotcod, the party in the corner is still waiting. 776 00:52:13,131 --> 00:52:16,134 Tell them it's coming up right away. Just go away. I've got no time. 777 00:52:16,218 --> 00:52:19,304 Perhaps it would help if you'd put the pitcher of ale over here 778 00:52:19,387 --> 00:52:21,181 and the jar of mead over here. 779 00:52:21,264 --> 00:52:24,267 'Cause I couldn't help noticing you were impairing your efficiency by... 780 00:52:24,351 --> 00:52:26,561 Christ's kidneys. Will you get out of my way! 781 00:52:26,645 --> 00:52:28,647 Here, Betty. Come and give me a hand here. 782 00:52:28,730 --> 00:52:30,482 Your wife's not here! 783 00:52:32,067 --> 00:52:34,903 - Your wife? - Not here? 784 00:52:34,986 --> 00:52:36,655 Not here? Where is she? 785 00:52:37,989 --> 00:52:40,116 Well, s-she's... 786 00:52:40,200 --> 00:52:41,660 - She's what? - I don't know. 787 00:52:41,743 --> 00:52:43,119 M-M-Maybe she's... 788 00:52:43,203 --> 00:52:46,540 And where's that friend of yours? That loudmouthed squire? 789 00:52:49,417 --> 00:52:50,919 What? 790 00:52:51,002 --> 00:52:52,462 - No. No. - "No" what? 791 00:52:52,546 --> 00:52:55,340 They're not upstairs. I mean, they're not... they're not... here. 792 00:52:55,423 --> 00:52:57,884 N-N-No, no, they're not here. Not here. 793 00:52:57,968 --> 00:52:59,302 What? 794 00:53:00,595 --> 00:53:02,764 You swine! 795 00:53:05,016 --> 00:53:07,978 I'm gonna kill him. Then I'm gonna kill you. 796 00:53:08,061 --> 00:53:09,688 Right. 797 00:53:11,731 --> 00:53:14,234 [grunting] 798 00:53:22,868 --> 00:53:25,954 [gasps, whimpering] 799 00:53:29,249 --> 00:53:30,876 [whimpering continues] 800 00:53:32,377 --> 00:53:34,546 [screaming] 801 00:53:34,629 --> 00:53:36,047 [grunting] 802 00:53:36,131 --> 00:53:37,966 - Oh-ho! - You... 803 00:53:38,049 --> 00:53:40,927 - [whines] - I'm going to get you! 804 00:53:41,011 --> 00:53:43,013 Oh, you sweet-talker, you! 805 00:53:45,807 --> 00:53:47,726 Oh, you toad! 806 00:53:47,809 --> 00:53:50,395 [gasping] 807 00:53:51,771 --> 00:53:54,733 Right! What's all this? 808 00:53:54,816 --> 00:53:59,070 Brawling in the public streets. Disturbing the king's peace, eh? 809 00:53:59,154 --> 00:54:01,615 This man... My wife... Let go of me. 810 00:54:01,698 --> 00:54:04,910 All right, hold him, Fred. Now, young fella... 811 00:54:04,993 --> 00:54:07,913 Here, I know you! 812 00:54:07,996 --> 00:54:11,166 Fred, it was him who tried to get in the other day. 813 00:54:11,249 --> 00:54:13,293 - My wife and that squire! - Let's take 'em to the dungeon. 814 00:54:13,376 --> 00:54:14,878 A few days there will sort 'em out. 815 00:54:14,961 --> 00:54:19,215 [laughs] Righto. Then we can put irons on their legs, eh? 816 00:54:19,299 --> 00:54:20,508 - [screams] - But... 817 00:54:20,592 --> 00:54:21,635 You can't! 818 00:54:21,718 --> 00:54:26,389 Destroy the monster? Oh, sire. [chuckles] 819 00:54:26,473 --> 00:54:28,934 If you destroy the monster, you destroy the city. 820 00:54:29,017 --> 00:54:32,812 In the long term, it will be shown that we owe to the monster 821 00:54:32,896 --> 00:54:36,566 a period of prosperity unprecedented in this kingdom. 822 00:54:36,650 --> 00:54:40,153 Oh, this is ridiculous. Your Majesty, the tournament must continue. 823 00:54:40,236 --> 00:54:42,238 A champion must be chosen. 824 00:54:42,322 --> 00:54:44,032 - Bruno. - Eh? 825 00:54:44,115 --> 00:54:47,619 The merchants may be prospering, but your kingdom's on the verge of collapse. 826 00:54:47,702 --> 00:54:50,455 Oh. Yes. Oh, well, ah... Now, that... 827 00:54:50,538 --> 00:54:52,165 Now hear this! 828 00:54:53,708 --> 00:54:55,210 The king, 829 00:54:55,293 --> 00:54:58,046 that flower of chivalry, that prince of monarchs, 830 00:54:58,129 --> 00:55:01,800 that paragon of potentates, is going to speak. 831 00:55:02,550 --> 00:55:05,053 Hear the wisdom, witness the wit, 832 00:55:05,136 --> 00:55:07,764 observe the oratorical eloquence, 833 00:55:07,847 --> 00:55:10,016 lend an ear... 834 00:55:11,184 --> 00:55:12,352 Beautifully said. 835 00:55:12,435 --> 00:55:16,064 To the mellow voice, the tender tones, 836 00:55:16,147 --> 00:55:19,484 the voluptuous vowels, the coruscating consonants 837 00:55:19,567 --> 00:55:23,321 of His Majesty King Bruno. 838 00:55:24,447 --> 00:55:26,324 Very lovely. Well, I... 839 00:55:26,408 --> 00:55:29,869 Who is going to give it to you straight, illuminate the essence, 840 00:55:29,953 --> 00:55:33,540 clarify the conundrums, dazzle us with logic. 841 00:55:34,416 --> 00:55:38,086 My lords, Your Grace, Your Honor... 842 00:55:39,087 --> 00:55:40,088 the king. 843 00:55:40,171 --> 00:55:43,425 Eh? Oh! Oh, yes, yes. 844 00:55:43,508 --> 00:55:48,888 Bishop, my dear fellow, how can you, a man of God, say that the beast is good? Hmm? 845 00:55:48,972 --> 00:55:52,017 I, uh, welcome your question. Yes. 846 00:55:52,100 --> 00:55:55,353 Uh, indeed, it may seem paradoxical, but... 847 00:55:55,437 --> 00:55:58,523 [chuckles] since the advent of the beast, 848 00:55:58,606 --> 00:56:02,444 church attendance has tripled, tithing has increased, 849 00:56:02,527 --> 00:56:06,614 long lines of sinners wait eagerly outside the confessionals. 850 00:56:06,698 --> 00:56:08,575 Piety has never been higher. 851 00:56:08,658 --> 00:56:11,161 - Oh, bravo, bravo. - Bravo. Bravo. 852 00:56:11,244 --> 00:56:12,829 Well, my lord Bishop... 853 00:56:12,912 --> 00:56:15,290 Oh, yes. Oh, yes. 854 00:56:15,373 --> 00:56:18,084 The king will speak. 855 00:56:18,168 --> 00:56:19,669 The king. 856 00:56:20,170 --> 00:56:23,381 Thank you. [chuckling] 857 00:56:23,465 --> 00:56:25,717 - Guard! - Sire. 858 00:56:25,800 --> 00:56:27,469 - Kill that man. - Sire. 859 00:56:27,552 --> 00:56:29,054 What? 860 00:56:29,137 --> 00:56:31,139 Who? Oh. 861 00:56:31,222 --> 00:56:33,892 Anyway, the most potent... 862 00:56:35,393 --> 00:56:39,439 Most poetical, most prestigious‒ 863 00:56:39,522 --> 00:56:42,358 - [screams] - [thuds] 864 00:56:44,194 --> 00:56:47,739 Well, Your Majesty, what is your opinion? 865 00:56:47,822 --> 00:56:49,422 - Your Highness. - Give us your guidance. 866 00:56:49,491 --> 00:56:52,952 - Even a hint. - Well, I think... 867 00:56:53,036 --> 00:56:55,914 [shouting, muttering] 868 00:56:55,997 --> 00:57:00,001 Oh, no. What's that? What's going on here? 869 00:57:00,085 --> 00:57:01,961 Just one moment. 870 00:57:03,004 --> 00:57:05,215 [men shouting continues] 871 00:57:07,300 --> 00:57:09,385 [grunting] 872 00:57:10,011 --> 00:57:11,846 What is going on here? 873 00:57:11,930 --> 00:57:15,683 Who dares sully my castle with unseemly brawls? 874 00:57:15,767 --> 00:57:17,852 Guard, bring them in. 875 00:57:18,895 --> 00:57:21,147 We'll show them who's king around here. 876 00:57:21,231 --> 00:57:23,108 But, Your Majesty, we have important matters to... 877 00:57:23,191 --> 00:57:26,319 Important matters, Passelewe? 878 00:57:26,402 --> 00:57:30,490 Surely keeping the peace in my own castle is important. 879 00:57:30,573 --> 00:57:32,408 First things first. 880 00:57:33,118 --> 00:57:34,661 Oh! 881 00:57:34,744 --> 00:57:35,870 Ew. 882 00:57:39,082 --> 00:57:42,085 They'll taste the king's justice. 883 00:57:43,294 --> 00:57:44,712 [man] Let me go! 884 00:57:44,796 --> 00:57:46,506 [shouting] 885 00:57:52,345 --> 00:57:53,930 [King Bruno] Silence! 886 00:57:56,683 --> 00:57:58,393 Silence! 887 00:57:59,310 --> 00:58:01,020 Now, what's this all about? 888 00:58:01,104 --> 00:58:03,398 The squire... behind my back! 889 00:58:03,481 --> 00:58:08,403 Calm, my man. Remember, you're in the presence of your king. 890 00:58:08,486 --> 00:58:10,530 Guards, let him go. 891 00:58:11,823 --> 00:58:13,324 Let him speak. 892 00:58:13,408 --> 00:58:15,618 Your Majesty. 893 00:58:15,702 --> 00:58:19,956 This man... This ma... This man! 894 00:58:20,039 --> 00:58:23,126 - [shouting] - Look out, sire! Get down! 895 00:58:25,420 --> 00:58:27,505 [grunting, shouting] 896 00:58:27,589 --> 00:58:29,174 [cries out] 897 00:58:35,138 --> 00:58:36,764 [shouts] 898 00:58:36,848 --> 00:58:39,267 - Wait. Hold it. - [shouting continues] 899 00:58:49,444 --> 00:58:50,486 [sneezes] 900 00:58:53,489 --> 00:58:56,242 - [gasps] - [King Bruno] This is outrageous! 901 00:58:58,203 --> 00:59:01,831 - Weren't there two of them to begin with? - Yes, sir. 902 00:59:02,415 --> 00:59:06,127 - Well, where's the other one got to? - I don't know, sir. 903 00:59:06,211 --> 00:59:09,464 - [all coughing] - Right. Hmm. Yes. 904 00:59:10,506 --> 00:59:12,425 - [groans] - [man coughing] 905 00:59:12,508 --> 00:59:17,055 Right. Then it falls upon us to find this man guilty. 906 00:59:18,389 --> 00:59:21,517 Guilty? Guilty of what, sire? 907 00:59:22,393 --> 00:59:23,728 Cannibalism. 908 00:59:31,027 --> 00:59:32,528 [gasps] 909 00:59:33,947 --> 00:59:35,907 - Keep your eyes peeled. - Right. 910 00:59:38,451 --> 00:59:40,453 Quick, down this way! 911 01:00:11,276 --> 01:00:12,777 [gasps] 912 01:00:23,288 --> 01:00:25,915 - Check up there. - No. Come on. 913 01:00:35,425 --> 01:00:38,136 [all screaming] 914 01:00:39,470 --> 01:00:41,139 [nun] Watch the princess! Oh! 915 01:00:43,266 --> 01:00:45,977 At last you've come! 916 01:00:49,981 --> 01:00:52,608 - I'm terribly sorry for barging in. - Oh, don't be shy. 917 01:00:52,692 --> 01:00:54,819 - I knew you'd come some day. - Oh, Princess, for Christ's sake. 918 01:00:54,902 --> 01:00:56,654 I was coming up the stairs and saw your door... 919 01:00:56,738 --> 01:00:58,865 Put on this robe. And you, turn around. 920 01:00:58,948 --> 01:01:00,325 I don't want to b-bother any... 921 01:01:00,408 --> 01:01:03,536 [princess] Oh, you must have traveled far to reach me. 922 01:01:03,619 --> 01:01:07,832 Swum rivers, climbed mountains, fought battles. 923 01:01:07,915 --> 01:01:09,917 You can turn around now. 924 01:01:12,170 --> 01:01:15,715 There. Do I come up to your expectations? 925 01:01:15,798 --> 01:01:18,718 Do you find me beautiful? 926 01:01:19,469 --> 01:01:20,720 Oh, yes. Thank you. 927 01:01:20,803 --> 01:01:24,349 Oh, come, my prince. Don't be shy. 928 01:01:24,432 --> 01:01:27,393 But I can't. Look at me. I'm not dressed for the occasion. 929 01:01:27,477 --> 01:01:29,145 Oh. Tsk, tsk, tsk. Hush. 930 01:01:30,188 --> 01:01:34,108 You mustn't worry about those filthy peasant rags, 931 01:01:34,192 --> 01:01:37,653 which you were no doubt forced to don in some romantic adventure. 932 01:01:37,737 --> 01:01:41,824 Soon we'll have you attired once more in princely finery. 933 01:01:41,908 --> 01:01:43,826 No, no, no. You see, there's been some mistake. 934 01:01:43,910 --> 01:01:47,747 - See, uh, my name is Dennis. - Prince Dennis! 935 01:01:47,830 --> 01:01:51,417 - No, no. Dennis Cooper. I used to be... - But, oh, your face. 936 01:01:51,501 --> 01:01:55,254 - You're wounded. - Oh, no, it's nothing. Just a bruise. 937 01:01:55,338 --> 01:01:59,258 Just a bruise? Oh, how brave you are, my prince. 938 01:01:59,342 --> 01:02:03,054 For surely it must have been a terrible blow from a Saracen's blade. 939 01:02:03,137 --> 01:02:05,223 No, an innkeeper sat on me. 940 01:02:05,306 --> 01:02:09,060 You see, uh, he thought that... well, that this squire, you see... 941 01:02:09,143 --> 01:02:10,686 uh, his wife... 942 01:02:10,770 --> 01:02:14,273 - What, the innkeeper's wife was a squire? - Oh, no, no, no. 943 01:02:14,357 --> 01:02:18,111 Oh, I've been dreaming of this day for so long. 944 01:02:18,194 --> 01:02:23,199 But little did I expect one so brave and valiant and wise, 945 01:02:23,282 --> 01:02:26,327 one who's crossed the seven seas for me 946 01:02:26,411 --> 01:02:31,916 and galloped across deserts and dark canyons to be by my side at last. 947 01:02:31,999 --> 01:02:33,835 - [grunting] My love! - Come. 948 01:02:33,918 --> 01:02:37,004 - [screaming] - You must tell me of your many adventures. 949 01:02:37,088 --> 01:02:40,133 We must get to know each other before we're married. 950 01:02:40,758 --> 01:02:43,761 Married? Uh, no, I'm sorry, miss. 951 01:02:43,845 --> 01:02:48,182 - I-I can't. I can't do that. - Can't? Can't? 952 01:02:48,266 --> 01:02:50,393 Oh, my prince, did I hear you right? 953 01:02:51,185 --> 01:02:53,688 - It's very kind of you to ask, but... - No. 954 01:02:53,771 --> 01:02:56,023 No, don't tell me. I know. 955 01:02:56,107 --> 01:02:58,192 - I know. - You know? 956 01:02:58,276 --> 01:03:02,697 In your adventures, you rescued a maiden chained to a dark cliff. 957 01:03:03,781 --> 01:03:06,159 - Uh, no, not exactly. - She fell in love. 958 01:03:06,242 --> 01:03:08,119 - You fell in love. - No. 959 01:03:08,202 --> 01:03:11,205 And there and then, before the gods themselves, 960 01:03:11,289 --> 01:03:14,041 you made a pact that only death could break. 961 01:03:14,125 --> 01:03:16,794 - No, no, you're on the wrong tack. - But come, my prince. 962 01:03:16,878 --> 01:03:19,922 You must not linger in idle conversation. 963 01:03:20,798 --> 01:03:23,551 You gained entry to the castle by stealth, 964 01:03:23,634 --> 01:03:27,138 and now you must leave in the same way. 965 01:03:27,221 --> 01:03:28,848 I know! 966 01:03:28,931 --> 01:03:32,351 Sister Jessica, you must give your habit to the prince. 967 01:03:32,435 --> 01:03:35,438 - My habit, Princess? - Yes, and hurry. 968 01:03:35,521 --> 01:03:38,733 But... But what's wrong with Sister Marian's habit? 969 01:03:38,816 --> 01:03:41,652 - Don't be silly. Here. - But... 970 01:03:45,615 --> 01:03:48,618 Now, my prince, this is the plan. 971 01:03:49,952 --> 01:03:51,996 Tomorrow is St. Talulah's Day, 972 01:03:52,079 --> 01:03:55,416 and by first light, a nun of the order must depart the city 973 01:03:55,500 --> 01:03:58,336 and lay fresh dogwood on the spot 974 01:03:58,419 --> 01:04:02,006 where St. Talulah was martyred by the Ralph Benslow Four. 975 01:04:04,217 --> 01:04:06,344 You shall be that nun. 976 01:04:06,427 --> 01:04:08,846 Sister Jessica? 977 01:04:08,930 --> 01:04:10,431 Sister Jessica. 978 01:04:13,476 --> 01:04:15,937 Well, give it to the prince. 979 01:04:16,020 --> 01:04:18,105 Thank you, Sister Jes... 980 01:04:20,149 --> 01:04:21,943 sica. 981 01:04:22,026 --> 01:04:24,612 Then proceed to the western wall, 982 01:04:24,695 --> 01:04:27,281 but by the back streets only. 983 01:04:27,365 --> 01:04:29,825 When you get to the western gate, say, 984 01:04:29,909 --> 01:04:33,037 "I have the holy dogwood for St. Talulah's spot. 985 01:04:33,120 --> 01:04:35,039 Let me pass that I might pray a while." 986 01:04:42,630 --> 01:04:44,882 Oh, my prince. My prince. 987 01:04:45,925 --> 01:04:48,427 - Is this yours? - Uh, yes. No! 988 01:04:48,511 --> 01:04:51,514 Oh, please! Please let me have it. 989 01:04:51,597 --> 01:04:55,893 Let me have it as a souvenir of our hopeless, flawless love. 990 01:04:55,977 --> 01:04:58,688 - I'll cherish it always. - No, I can't. It was given... 991 01:04:58,771 --> 01:05:01,649 And now, my prince, you must flee. 992 01:05:01,732 --> 01:05:05,736 No! No, don't kiss me. I couldn't stand it. 993 01:05:05,820 --> 01:05:08,573 - I wasn't going to. - No. Just go. 994 01:05:08,656 --> 01:05:11,367 Just go, my prince. 995 01:05:11,450 --> 01:05:13,452 And remember, 996 01:05:13,536 --> 01:05:17,123 "I have the holy dogwood for St. Talulah's spot." 997 01:05:18,165 --> 01:05:20,543 In Latin, my love! 998 01:05:53,075 --> 01:05:55,661 - [thuds] - [animal growling] 999 01:05:55,745 --> 01:05:58,372 [dog barking] 1000 01:06:02,960 --> 01:06:04,837 - Evening, Sister. - [high voice] Evening. 1001 01:06:04,920 --> 01:06:07,923 [drunken singing] ♪ Oh, I met a maid ♪ 1002 01:06:08,841 --> 01:06:11,677 ♪ At Stepney Fair ♪ 1003 01:06:12,261 --> 01:06:15,014 ♪ Te-dum, te-dum ♪ 1004 01:06:15,097 --> 01:06:18,017 ♪ And golden hair ♪ 1005 01:06:18,100 --> 01:06:20,603 ♪ She said to me ♪ 1006 01:06:20,686 --> 01:06:23,147 ♪ O soldier brave ♪ 1007 01:06:23,230 --> 01:06:25,483 ♪ Te-dum, te-dum ♪ 1008 01:06:25,566 --> 01:06:29,070 ♪ Te-dum, te-dum ♪ 1009 01:06:29,153 --> 01:06:32,531 Ah! What have we got here? 1010 01:06:32,615 --> 01:06:35,326 A strange face? [laughing] 1011 01:06:35,409 --> 01:06:37,662 And a pretty one. 1012 01:06:37,745 --> 01:06:40,206 Well, now, let's have a look. 1013 01:06:40,289 --> 01:06:42,917 - Let's have a kiss. - Come on, Sarge. She's a nun. 1014 01:06:43,000 --> 01:06:44,794 So she is. 1015 01:06:44,877 --> 01:06:49,090 Let's have a Christian kiss. 1016 01:06:49,173 --> 01:06:50,966 - [shouts] - [gasps] 1017 01:06:51,050 --> 01:06:52,259 - [gasps] - [grunts] 1018 01:06:55,012 --> 01:06:56,639 What's the matter, Sarge? 1019 01:06:56,722 --> 01:07:00,059 Put me to bed, boys! Put me to bed. 1020 01:07:05,981 --> 01:07:07,566 [panting] 1021 01:07:10,111 --> 01:07:11,654 [people shouting] 1022 01:07:11,737 --> 01:07:14,156 Look, it's the devil in the guise of a nun! 1023 01:07:14,240 --> 01:07:16,492 [woman] No, it's a nun in the guise of a devil! 1024 01:07:16,575 --> 01:07:17,702 - Get her! - Get him! 1025 01:07:17,785 --> 01:07:18,994 Get them both! 1026 01:07:20,037 --> 01:07:24,917 Citizens, a sacrifice must be made to appease the monster 1027 01:07:25,000 --> 01:07:28,421 that lurks in the darkness in wait for us all! 1028 01:07:28,504 --> 01:07:31,716 And what better than to sacrifice 1029 01:07:31,799 --> 01:07:33,676 one of the beast's own servants, 1030 01:07:33,759 --> 01:07:38,764 whom we caught masquerading as a holy sister of the Mother Church? 1031 01:07:38,848 --> 01:07:41,684 - [shrieking] - [all groaning] 1032 01:07:44,019 --> 01:07:47,314 We will fire him into the eternal darkness 1033 01:07:47,398 --> 01:07:51,777 as a testimony to our piety and godliness! 1034 01:07:53,779 --> 01:07:57,616 Imagine his agony as the flames rise higher, 1035 01:07:57,700 --> 01:08:01,328 higher until he is but a ball of living fire! 1036 01:08:01,412 --> 01:08:02,872 Oh, the agony! 1037 01:08:02,955 --> 01:08:05,624 Imagine his horror 1038 01:08:05,708 --> 01:08:09,545 as the mighty ballistic device hurls him high 1039 01:08:09,628 --> 01:08:12,131 into the depths of the blackened sky! 1040 01:08:12,214 --> 01:08:15,426 I am imagining the horror of it all! 1041 01:08:15,509 --> 01:08:18,888 Imagine the terror of his suspense 1042 01:08:18,971 --> 01:08:21,807 as our poor sacrifice waits, waits, 1043 01:08:21,891 --> 01:08:28,147 waits for the darkling earth to rise up and crush him to its harsh bosom! 1044 01:08:28,230 --> 01:08:30,274 [shouting] 1045 01:08:30,357 --> 01:08:32,193 The incertitude. 1046 01:08:32,276 --> 01:08:34,153 Oh, the uncertainty! 1047 01:08:34,236 --> 01:08:35,613 I like suspense. 1048 01:08:35,696 --> 01:08:38,324 Imagine his final horror 1049 01:08:38,407 --> 01:08:41,535 as his miserable little life is snuffed out 1050 01:08:41,619 --> 01:08:45,664 in a glorious bone-crushing cascade of phosphorescence 1051 01:08:45,748 --> 01:08:50,711 as he finally, agonizingly smashes into the ground! 1052 01:08:55,216 --> 01:08:58,260 - That's not fair, that. - No, that's not fair at all. 1053 01:08:58,344 --> 01:09:01,806 - It isn't fair. - What's not fair? 1054 01:09:01,889 --> 01:09:03,557 How come he gets to go? 1055 01:09:03,641 --> 01:09:05,726 Why should he have all the pain and all the agony? 1056 01:09:05,810 --> 01:09:09,104 All that bone-crushing horror. I want to go! 1057 01:09:09,188 --> 01:09:11,524 - [man] No, I want to go. - No, I want to burn. 1058 01:09:11,607 --> 01:09:15,152 I want to feel my bones bursting into a billion pieces! 1059 01:09:15,236 --> 01:09:20,491 I want to trace across the firmament, a glowing ball of flame, 1060 01:09:20,574 --> 01:09:24,328 a testament to my godliness and piety! 1061 01:09:24,411 --> 01:09:25,913 What does that mean? 1062 01:09:25,996 --> 01:09:28,457 - I don't know, but I want it! - [shouting] 1063 01:09:28,541 --> 01:09:30,167 I want it! 1064 01:09:36,340 --> 01:09:39,552 [laughing hysterically] 1065 01:09:42,179 --> 01:09:44,223 Fire! 1066 01:09:50,771 --> 01:09:52,398 [laughing, shouting stop] 1067 01:09:53,065 --> 01:09:54,733 [man] Nice. 1068 01:09:57,820 --> 01:09:59,363 [bell tolling] 1069 01:10:00,823 --> 01:10:04,285 [King Bruno] Another glorious day for a tournament, eh, Passelewe? 1070 01:10:04,368 --> 01:10:06,245 I suppose so, Your Majesty. 1071 01:10:07,204 --> 01:10:10,624 You suppose so? You suppose so? 1072 01:10:10,708 --> 01:10:12,751 Buck up, man. Buck up. 1073 01:10:12,835 --> 01:10:14,461 It's tournament time! 1074 01:10:15,379 --> 01:10:16,839 [Passelewe] Certainly, Your Majesty. 1075 01:10:17,464 --> 01:10:22,469 But I can't but think there must be a better way to choose a champion. 1076 01:10:22,553 --> 01:10:24,722 A better way, Passelewe? 1077 01:10:24,805 --> 01:10:27,266 What better than the shattering of lances, 1078 01:10:27,349 --> 01:10:30,853 the flailing of the mace, the cut and thrust of broadswords, 1079 01:10:30,936 --> 01:10:33,397 the ring of falchion on cuissart? 1080 01:10:33,480 --> 01:10:36,275 What better way than an honest tournament? 1081 01:10:36,358 --> 01:10:39,778 Hmm, Passelewe? [chuckling] Yes. 1082 01:10:39,862 --> 01:10:42,406 Ah, my dear. 1083 01:10:42,489 --> 01:10:46,035 How beautiful you look. [chuckling] 1084 01:10:46,118 --> 01:10:48,579 Ah! Yes. 1085 01:10:48,662 --> 01:10:51,206 Th... [sniffs] 1086 01:10:51,290 --> 01:10:53,834 What on earth is that? 1087 01:10:53,918 --> 01:10:55,377 - But, Daddy... - Ugh! 1088 01:10:57,838 --> 01:10:59,381 Daddy! 1089 01:11:05,846 --> 01:11:08,265 - [trumpet fanfare] - [horse whinnying] 1090 01:11:16,106 --> 01:11:18,359 - [lance hitting body] - Look at that. 1091 01:11:18,442 --> 01:11:22,154 Did you see that? Right in the middle of the old demi-brassard. 1092 01:11:22,237 --> 01:11:24,323 Jolly good. Bravo! 1093 01:11:25,491 --> 01:11:28,452 Another one on the maimed list, probably dead by now. 1094 01:11:28,535 --> 01:11:32,164 Ah, merely a scratch, that's all. Plenty more knights where he came from. 1095 01:11:32,247 --> 01:11:34,667 Not really, sire. 1096 01:11:34,750 --> 01:11:38,796 What do you mean, Passelewe, "Not really, sire"? 1097 01:11:38,879 --> 01:11:42,925 Now, which part of this is giving you difficulty, Your Majesty? 1098 01:11:43,008 --> 01:11:46,804 Well, all of it, frankly. What do you mean by it? 1099 01:11:46,887 --> 01:11:49,306 Well, basically, I mean by saying, "Not really, sire," 1100 01:11:49,390 --> 01:11:53,435 I mean that the true situation is, or is likely to be... 1101 01:11:53,519 --> 01:11:55,521 - Yes? - Ipso facto to the contrary 1102 01:11:55,604 --> 01:11:59,316 and the exact opposite to that which you may perceive. 1103 01:11:59,400 --> 01:12:01,652 I appended "sire," because, after all, you are the king. 1104 01:12:01,735 --> 01:12:03,654 - I mean, you are the king, aren't you? - Yes. 1105 01:12:03,737 --> 01:12:06,407 And that seems to be a reasonable way of addressing a monarch. 1106 01:12:06,490 --> 01:12:08,492 - Yes. - Daddy. 1107 01:12:08,575 --> 01:12:10,411 What is it, darling? 1108 01:12:10,494 --> 01:12:12,663 Oh, I'm sorry, Passelewe. What is it, darling? 1109 01:12:12,746 --> 01:12:16,208 Look at that brute of a knight. I couldn't marry anything like that. 1110 01:12:16,291 --> 01:12:19,128 Of course not. You won't have to. 1111 01:12:19,211 --> 01:12:22,131 [laughing] He won't... 1112 01:12:23,382 --> 01:12:25,759 - [cheers] - [metal clattering] 1113 01:12:25,843 --> 01:12:27,636 Win. 1114 01:12:27,720 --> 01:12:29,388 [coughing] 1115 01:12:29,471 --> 01:12:32,766 Passelewe, what were we discussing a moment ago? 1116 01:12:32,850 --> 01:12:35,602 The toll of your knights, sir. According to my record... 1117 01:12:35,686 --> 01:12:38,230 Ah, just a moment, Passelewe. 1118 01:12:38,313 --> 01:12:41,483 You used that "sire" for the same reason 1119 01:12:41,567 --> 01:12:44,111 that you used it in the first place, right? 1120 01:12:44,194 --> 01:12:46,196 - Right. - Right. [chuckles] 1121 01:12:46,280 --> 01:12:48,032 - I thought so. - Right. 1122 01:12:48,115 --> 01:12:53,495 Well, according to my records, approximately 65 percent of the knights of your realm 1123 01:12:53,579 --> 01:12:56,040 have been killed or maimed since this tournament began. 1124 01:12:56,749 --> 01:12:59,501 - [crowd cheering] - But, Passelewe, that's no figure at all. 1125 01:12:59,585 --> 01:13:01,295 No figure at all. 1126 01:13:01,378 --> 01:13:05,632 Now, if it was 83.3 percent or 97.4 percent, 1127 01:13:05,716 --> 01:13:08,093 now, that is a true percentage 1128 01:13:08,177 --> 01:13:10,637 in absolutely the truest sense of the word. 1129 01:13:10,721 --> 01:13:12,347 Now, my dearest Bruno, do listen. 1130 01:13:12,431 --> 01:13:16,060 If this carnage continues even until the end of the week, where on earth... 1131 01:13:16,143 --> 01:13:17,770 - Hold it, hold it! - What? 1132 01:13:17,853 --> 01:13:20,064 - This one I must see. - [horses galloping] 1133 01:13:21,857 --> 01:13:25,235 - [metal clanging] - [crowd cheering] 1134 01:13:25,319 --> 01:13:27,863 There must be a better way of choosing a champion. 1135 01:13:30,866 --> 01:13:32,367 Psst. Ethel? 1136 01:13:33,368 --> 01:13:35,162 - Is that you, Ethel? - [gasps] 1137 01:13:35,245 --> 01:13:37,748 Yeah. I wondered what the hell happened to you last night. 1138 01:13:37,831 --> 01:13:40,042 - Well, I had some incredible adventures. - Can't talk now. 1139 01:13:40,125 --> 01:13:43,337 - Due in the lists in 10 minutes' time. - I'm coming, Mother. 1140 01:13:45,380 --> 01:13:47,049 Aye! 1141 01:13:47,132 --> 01:13:50,677 Watch where you're getting the blood, will you? Christ Almighty! 1142 01:13:50,761 --> 01:13:53,388 How else can we choose a champion? 1143 01:13:53,472 --> 01:13:55,641 Well, I suppose we could call an election. 1144 01:13:55,724 --> 01:13:57,893 - Election, Passelewe? - Yes. 1145 01:13:57,976 --> 01:14:01,688 Oh, no, nonsense. It wouldn't be fair to the knights. 1146 01:14:01,772 --> 01:14:03,982 Well, they could draw lots. 1147 01:14:04,066 --> 01:14:06,110 - Draw lots? - Yes. 1148 01:14:06,193 --> 01:14:09,947 [laughing] Bless my soul. 1149 01:14:10,030 --> 01:14:13,742 I mean to say, you might just as well do it dip-dip-dip, my little ship 1150 01:14:13,826 --> 01:14:16,245 or one potato, two potatoes. 1151 01:14:16,328 --> 01:14:20,165 - [chuckling] Or even hide and seek. - [horses galloping] 1152 01:14:20,249 --> 01:14:22,292 Uh... 1153 01:14:22,376 --> 01:14:26,547 Forty-eight, 49, 50. 1154 01:14:27,756 --> 01:14:29,508 Coming! 1155 01:14:31,510 --> 01:14:33,011 [cheering] 1156 01:14:34,471 --> 01:14:35,848 [armor squeaking] 1157 01:14:35,931 --> 01:14:39,017 - The cardinal said, "I asked for 13 vergers." - Vergers? 1158 01:14:39,101 --> 01:14:43,147 "Why have you brought me 13 virgins?" [laughing] 1159 01:14:43,230 --> 01:14:47,943 Now, we're in the garden, and a thousand voices said as one man, 1160 01:14:48,026 --> 01:14:52,531 "Ave, ave, passed through this way, the old grub." 1161 01:14:54,116 --> 01:14:57,369 - "Ave, ave" what? - [laughing] 1162 01:14:57,452 --> 01:14:59,037 Why do I need to say "Ave"? 1163 01:14:59,121 --> 01:15:03,292 Dennis, why don't you sit back and let something nice happen to you for a change? 1164 01:15:03,375 --> 01:15:06,712 - [crowd cheering] - Looks like they've chosen a champion. 1165 01:15:06,795 --> 01:15:09,047 - Can you see who it is? - [trumpets blaring] 1166 01:15:09,131 --> 01:15:11,091 [trumpet fanfare] 1167 01:15:13,552 --> 01:15:16,638 It's my boss. Christ. 1168 01:15:16,722 --> 01:15:20,517 Well, congratulations, sire. We have a champion. 1169 01:15:20,601 --> 01:15:22,394 Good. [chuckling] 1170 01:15:22,477 --> 01:15:24,771 - Where is he? - Oh, they haven't found him yet. 1171 01:15:24,855 --> 01:15:27,316 - Oh. Is that good? - Oh, yes. 1172 01:15:27,399 --> 01:15:30,110 That's what makes him a champion. 1173 01:15:30,194 --> 01:15:31,820 [sighs] I see. 1174 01:15:37,284 --> 01:15:40,162 - [horse whinnies] - They will find him, won't they? 1175 01:15:44,499 --> 01:15:47,544 - You must be very proud. - Proud? You shit! 1176 01:15:48,545 --> 01:15:50,380 - Shit! - It's a great honor, isn't it? 1177 01:15:50,464 --> 01:15:53,342 Honor? Maybe he'll get the honor. 1178 01:15:53,425 --> 01:15:57,304 I'll probably end up with a dragon's tooth up my bum and a shilling a year pension. 1179 01:15:58,513 --> 01:16:01,767 I'll have to sit vigil with him all night as well. 1180 01:16:01,850 --> 01:16:03,810 Christ, what luck! 1181 01:16:06,605 --> 01:16:09,399 I promised my body to a woman tonight. 1182 01:16:10,484 --> 01:16:12,653 Look, maybe I could go and tell the lady that... 1183 01:16:12,736 --> 01:16:14,279 [shouts] What? 1184 01:16:15,656 --> 01:16:17,157 [grunts] 1185 01:16:17,574 --> 01:16:20,285 Wait a minute. Maybe you could do it. 1186 01:16:20,369 --> 01:16:22,579 Certainly I could. I'll tell the lady you've had a great... 1187 01:16:22,663 --> 01:16:26,541 No, not that. Sit the vigil. 1188 01:16:26,625 --> 01:16:28,168 Me? 1189 01:16:28,252 --> 01:16:32,005 I could give you my hat, my cape. 1190 01:16:32,881 --> 01:16:35,509 Just keep your head down. He'll never know. 1191 01:16:35,592 --> 01:16:37,261 I can't do that. It's not right. 1192 01:16:37,344 --> 01:16:39,596 - [trumpet fanfare] - Who'll know? Come on! 1193 01:16:39,680 --> 01:16:42,391 [woman laughing] 1194 01:16:43,976 --> 01:16:45,978 [muffled shouting] 1195 01:16:46,061 --> 01:16:50,399 - [roaring] - [screams] Beast! 1196 01:16:50,482 --> 01:16:52,025 Here I am, I am! 1197 01:16:52,109 --> 01:16:56,321 - Oh, not you! - [roaring continues] 1198 01:16:56,405 --> 01:16:58,490 Ah, forget it. 1199 01:16:58,573 --> 01:17:01,285 - [grunting] - [laughing] 1200 01:17:03,870 --> 01:17:06,331 [loud roaring] 1201 01:17:08,000 --> 01:17:09,960 [snoring] 1202 01:17:10,043 --> 01:17:13,046 - [roaring, shrieking] - [screaming] 1203 01:17:13,130 --> 01:17:15,674 [snoring] 1204 01:17:23,181 --> 01:17:25,684 [growling quietly] 1205 01:17:25,767 --> 01:17:28,979 [rooster crows] 1206 01:17:39,823 --> 01:17:42,576 [snoring continues] 1207 01:17:42,659 --> 01:17:45,704 [muttering] 1208 01:17:57,174 --> 01:17:58,800 [Betty] Squire? What squire? 1209 01:17:58,884 --> 01:18:04,056 [landlord] You know what squire! Oh! My rheumatism. 1210 01:18:04,139 --> 01:18:06,016 That cell was so damp. 1211 01:18:06,099 --> 01:18:09,144 - Two whole nights. - Oh, you poor dear. 1212 01:18:09,227 --> 01:18:12,731 Come, let me undress you and put you to bed. 1213 01:18:12,814 --> 01:18:15,525 It must have been an awful experience. 1214 01:18:16,735 --> 01:18:18,612 It was. 1215 01:18:18,695 --> 01:18:21,114 Oh, Betty. 1216 01:18:21,198 --> 01:18:24,159 Your hands are so soft and warm. 1217 01:18:24,242 --> 01:18:29,373 You don't really think there was a squire up here in our bed, do you? 1218 01:18:29,456 --> 01:18:31,291 - Well... - Do you? 1219 01:18:31,375 --> 01:18:34,211 Come, let me take those off. 1220 01:18:34,294 --> 01:18:35,962 And that. 1221 01:18:36,046 --> 01:18:39,257 Mmm. Doesn't that feel better? 1222 01:18:39,341 --> 01:18:42,094 Oh, Betty. 1223 01:18:42,177 --> 01:18:45,013 Bernard, my darling. 1224 01:18:45,097 --> 01:18:49,518 - [Bernard moaning] - [gasps] 1225 01:18:53,522 --> 01:18:55,482 [Betty giggling] 1226 01:18:56,400 --> 01:18:58,360 [snoring] 1227 01:18:58,443 --> 01:19:00,987 - [snorts] - Come. 1228 01:19:01,071 --> 01:19:02,906 [cheering] 1229 01:19:28,890 --> 01:19:31,184 [pounding on ground] 1230 01:19:31,268 --> 01:19:34,354 [voice breaking] Citizens, nobles... 1231 01:19:36,064 --> 01:19:38,150 gentry, 1232 01:19:38,233 --> 01:19:40,402 the king. 1233 01:19:41,778 --> 01:19:43,655 Heh? Oh, yes. 1234 01:19:47,576 --> 01:19:51,997 Good Sir Knight, you have proved your worth on the field of honor. 1235 01:19:52,080 --> 01:19:53,457 [giggles, snorts] 1236 01:19:55,625 --> 01:19:57,794 [clears throat] 1237 01:19:57,878 --> 01:20:01,631 And now you must prove yourself in mortal combat 1238 01:20:01,715 --> 01:20:03,633 with a monster so terrifying, 1239 01:20:03,717 --> 01:20:06,761 so awe-inspiring, so horrible, 1240 01:20:06,845 --> 01:20:08,722 so soul-destroying... 1241 01:20:10,056 --> 01:20:12,058 that even I would hesitate... 1242 01:20:13,143 --> 01:20:16,062 to meet it face-to-face... 1243 01:20:17,314 --> 01:20:20,358 in, um, um, hand-to-hand combat. 1244 01:20:21,359 --> 01:20:22,736 Was that all right? 1245 01:20:22,819 --> 01:20:25,197 Well, I suppose so, my darling, yes. 1246 01:20:26,281 --> 01:20:30,619 And so, go forth and slay the beast. 1247 01:20:30,702 --> 01:20:35,499 [chuckling] And take with you the royal blessings... 1248 01:20:36,958 --> 01:20:39,419 and also the blessings 1249 01:20:39,503 --> 01:20:41,880 of Mother Church. 1250 01:20:43,757 --> 01:20:44,799 Bishop! 1251 01:20:44,883 --> 01:20:48,720 [chorus chanting dirge] 1252 01:20:58,939 --> 01:21:00,941 [grunts] Hey! 1253 01:21:04,110 --> 01:21:05,904 Ow! Ooh! Get out of here! 1254 01:21:05,987 --> 01:21:07,697 Bloody swords! 1255 01:21:30,512 --> 01:21:32,347 [dirge stops] 1256 01:21:42,649 --> 01:21:45,277 - Is that all? - That's it. 1257 01:21:48,697 --> 01:21:50,532 Oh. [sniffs] 1258 01:21:50,615 --> 01:21:53,743 Right. Uh, herald. 1259 01:21:54,703 --> 01:21:56,705 Have the gates opened. 1260 01:21:59,916 --> 01:22:00,917 Well, carry on! 1261 01:22:03,253 --> 01:22:06,715 - Open the gates! - [blowing sour notes] 1262 01:22:06,798 --> 01:22:09,467 [creaking] 1263 01:22:22,188 --> 01:22:23,690 Farewell. 1264 01:22:27,193 --> 01:22:28,445 Wait! 1265 01:22:32,782 --> 01:22:35,201 [puppeteer] Ah. 1266 01:22:36,119 --> 01:22:39,331 He took his vorpal sword in hand, 1267 01:22:39,414 --> 01:22:43,084 long time the manxome foe he sought. 1268 01:22:43,168 --> 01:22:47,756 So rested he by the Tumtum tree 1269 01:22:47,839 --> 01:22:51,468 and stood a while... in thought. 1270 01:22:52,177 --> 01:22:55,221 And as in uffish thought he stood, 1271 01:22:55,305 --> 01:22:58,725 the Jabberwock with eyes aflame 1272 01:22:58,808 --> 01:23:02,771 came whiffling through the tulgey wood 1273 01:23:02,854 --> 01:23:05,440 and burbled as it came. 1274 01:23:05,523 --> 01:23:07,025 [shrieking] 1275 01:23:07,108 --> 01:23:10,278 - Lance. - [people screaming] 1276 01:23:10,362 --> 01:23:12,364 Lance. Lance. 1277 01:23:12,447 --> 01:23:15,200 [screaming, shouting] 1278 01:23:19,204 --> 01:23:21,414 Whoa-ha! 1279 01:23:29,255 --> 01:23:30,882 [woman screaming] 1280 01:23:37,138 --> 01:23:39,140 [screaming continues] 1281 01:23:40,433 --> 01:23:43,144 [man groaning] 1282 01:23:54,698 --> 01:23:55,907 [braying] 1283 01:24:04,249 --> 01:24:06,835 [gasping, groaning] 1284 01:24:08,628 --> 01:24:10,880 [screaming] 1285 01:24:11,756 --> 01:24:12,757 Griselda! 1286 01:24:17,595 --> 01:24:19,264 Go get 'em, boys! 1287 01:24:22,350 --> 01:24:25,019 [all shouting] 1288 01:24:25,770 --> 01:24:28,148 Monster? Monster? 1289 01:24:28,231 --> 01:24:30,358 [men laughing, shouting] 1290 01:24:30,442 --> 01:24:33,695 - Oh. - [knight] Where monster? 1291 01:24:33,778 --> 01:24:36,072 Oh! Oh! Oh! 1292 01:24:37,532 --> 01:24:39,242 - Oh! - [bandit] There he is! 1293 01:24:42,954 --> 01:24:47,000 - Come on. Don't let him get away. - [man screams] 1294 01:24:47,083 --> 01:24:50,128 Monster? Monster? 1295 01:24:50,211 --> 01:24:52,213 No Mon... [gasps] 1296 01:24:52,297 --> 01:24:54,174 Ha-ha! 1297 01:24:55,675 --> 01:24:57,177 [farts] 1298 01:24:58,762 --> 01:25:00,764 [grunting] 1299 01:25:00,847 --> 01:25:03,558 [all screaming] 1300 01:25:04,601 --> 01:25:07,687 - [knight grunting] - [metal creaking] 1301 01:25:14,736 --> 01:25:17,906 I am here, Griselda. Fear not. 1302 01:25:17,989 --> 01:25:20,200 Gee, a knight. 1303 01:25:20,283 --> 01:25:22,619 I never saw a knight before. 1304 01:25:23,870 --> 01:25:27,290 - [loud groaning] - Oh, Mr. Fishfinger. 1305 01:25:27,373 --> 01:25:30,001 - [Mrs. Fishfinger sobbing] - Oh, stop dribbling, woman! 1306 01:25:30,084 --> 01:25:32,629 Oh, bless you. Oh, noble lad. 1307 01:25:32,712 --> 01:25:35,340 Oh, thank you. Oh! 1308 01:25:35,715 --> 01:25:38,593 Stand aside, Mrs. Fishfinger. And... 1309 01:25:38,676 --> 01:25:42,889 [screaming] Oh, fuck! Aah! 1310 01:25:42,972 --> 01:25:45,141 Sorry, Mr. Fishfinger. Are you all right? 1311 01:25:45,225 --> 01:25:48,353 - [crying] - You almost cut my arm off! 1312 01:25:48,436 --> 01:25:53,775 Oh, you always were a clumsy one, Dennis Cooper. 1313 01:25:53,858 --> 01:25:55,985 Shame on you! 1314 01:25:56,069 --> 01:25:58,029 Get out! 1315 01:25:58,112 --> 01:26:00,406 Jesus! 1316 01:26:00,490 --> 01:26:03,660 I could get blood poisoning. Was that sword sterilized? 1317 01:26:03,743 --> 01:26:05,954 I'm terribly sorry. I didn't mean to. 1318 01:26:06,037 --> 01:26:08,790 Look, I-I'll bind it up for you. I'll get some bandages. 1319 01:26:08,873 --> 01:26:10,875 Jesus. Get off! 1320 01:26:12,418 --> 01:26:13,920 Dad! 1321 01:26:15,171 --> 01:26:17,340 - What? - Look! 1322 01:26:20,885 --> 01:26:22,929 - [knight grunting] - Huh? 1323 01:26:23,721 --> 01:26:26,057 Good Sir Knight. Good Sir Knight. 1324 01:26:26,140 --> 01:26:31,729 We're so grateful to you for rescuing us from the clutches of those foul fiends. 1325 01:26:31,813 --> 01:26:34,232 - Easy. - Very good. 1326 01:26:34,315 --> 01:26:36,276 - Very gracious of you, Sir Knight. - Yes. 1327 01:26:36,359 --> 01:26:40,446 We're very undeserving really, being just humble fisher folk. 1328 01:26:40,530 --> 01:26:44,284 Yes, however, we do have this maiden daughter, you see. 1329 01:26:44,367 --> 01:26:46,786 And as there is a custom in these parts, 1330 01:26:46,870 --> 01:26:51,082 the knight quite often marries the maiden he's rescued. 1331 01:26:51,165 --> 01:26:53,918 Say hello to the knight, Griselda, honey. 1332 01:26:54,002 --> 01:26:56,796 Mr. Fishfinger. Mr. Fishfinger. It was me that rescued you. 1333 01:26:56,880 --> 01:27:00,800 Will you clear off? What do you say, Sir Knight, hmm? 1334 01:27:00,884 --> 01:27:03,219 Good Sir Knight. 1335 01:27:03,303 --> 01:27:05,513 [grunting] 1336 01:27:07,891 --> 01:27:09,601 [horse whinnies] 1337 01:27:11,144 --> 01:27:13,104 - Well? - Come. We go. 1338 01:27:13,187 --> 01:27:17,984 Wait, wait! Come back here! Sir Knight, come back, please! 1339 01:27:18,067 --> 01:27:19,861 - Whoo-hoo! - You will think it over, won't you? 1340 01:27:19,944 --> 01:27:23,239 Griselda, Mr. Fishfinger. I've gotta go. I'm sorry about your hand. 1341 01:27:23,323 --> 01:27:26,117 - It hurts! It... - Griselda, I've missed you so much. 1342 01:27:26,200 --> 01:27:29,662 - I've kept your potato. - Ugh! Bye! 1343 01:27:30,622 --> 01:27:33,917 You really are a big disappointment to me, Dennis. 1344 01:27:34,000 --> 01:27:36,961 Get out. I thought you were going to make something of yourself! 1345 01:27:37,045 --> 01:27:39,589 Mr. Fishfinger, he is the king's champion. 1346 01:27:39,672 --> 01:27:43,134 Shame! Call yourself an eligible suitor for our fair Griselda? 1347 01:27:43,217 --> 01:27:44,844 You're nothing but a vagrant! 1348 01:27:44,928 --> 01:27:47,263 Hold him, Madge. Hold him! 1349 01:27:47,347 --> 01:27:51,351 - You leave her alone. Leave her alone! - Get on with you. 1350 01:27:51,434 --> 01:27:54,062 [braying] 1351 01:27:54,145 --> 01:27:56,439 - [shouts] - Go on! 1352 01:27:56,522 --> 01:27:58,232 Go on! 1353 01:27:58,316 --> 01:28:00,526 Go on. Get out of here. 1354 01:28:04,364 --> 01:28:06,324 Go on! Get off! 1355 01:28:06,407 --> 01:28:08,785 - Go on with you. - Go on! 1356 01:28:08,868 --> 01:28:10,370 - Yes! - Go home! 1357 01:28:32,600 --> 01:28:35,311 [screaming] 1358 01:28:35,395 --> 01:28:37,563 Someone at the door, dear. 1359 01:28:37,647 --> 01:28:40,316 [man] We've got to make up our minds now! 1360 01:28:40,400 --> 01:28:42,402 - Gentlemen! - We can't delay another day. 1361 01:28:42,485 --> 01:28:43,987 We must do something. 1362 01:28:44,070 --> 01:28:46,614 This king's champion must be stopped. 1363 01:28:46,698 --> 01:28:49,993 The monster must be protected. 1364 01:28:50,076 --> 01:28:53,287 If he kills the monster, we'll all be ruined. Ruined! 1365 01:28:53,371 --> 01:28:57,208 Let me prevail upon you. No more argy-bargy is necessary. 1366 01:28:57,291 --> 01:29:00,378 - No? - Because I have a plan. 1367 01:29:03,047 --> 01:29:05,466 [whispering] 1368 01:29:07,301 --> 01:29:09,178 - Behold! - [gasps] 1369 01:29:09,262 --> 01:29:11,139 The Black Knight. 1370 01:29:12,390 --> 01:29:15,435 Oh, wonderful! 1371 01:29:44,005 --> 01:29:47,175 [flies buzzing] 1372 01:29:51,304 --> 01:29:52,805 [Dennis gasps] 1373 01:29:58,644 --> 01:30:00,146 [horse blusters] 1374 01:30:06,319 --> 01:30:08,946 - [squishing sound] - [gasps] Ew! 1375 01:30:09,030 --> 01:30:10,865 Ugh. Ew! 1376 01:30:12,283 --> 01:30:14,952 [gagging] 1377 01:30:15,036 --> 01:30:16,954 I think we must be getting closer. 1378 01:30:38,017 --> 01:30:40,603 [rocks falling] 1379 01:30:41,646 --> 01:30:43,397 [men muttering, cackling] 1380 01:30:44,482 --> 01:30:46,818 [cackling continues] 1381 01:30:48,319 --> 01:30:52,323 [animals howling in distance] 1382 01:31:13,219 --> 01:31:15,763 - [horse whinnying] - [gasps] 1383 01:31:19,225 --> 01:31:21,352 [man laughing] 1384 01:31:22,186 --> 01:31:24,355 [horse whinnying] 1385 01:31:26,691 --> 01:31:28,943 [muttering] 1386 01:31:29,026 --> 01:31:32,029 Cuissart. Cuissart. 1387 01:31:38,494 --> 01:31:40,496 No, no, no, no. Cuissart. Cuissart. 1388 01:31:41,539 --> 01:31:42,832 No, no. 1389 01:31:45,543 --> 01:31:48,921 No, no. Come on, come on. 1390 01:31:49,005 --> 01:31:50,506 Oh. 1391 01:31:55,136 --> 01:31:56,637 Lance. 1392 01:31:58,806 --> 01:32:00,641 [horse whinnies] 1393 01:32:03,060 --> 01:32:04,687 Oh. [whimpers] 1394 01:32:11,235 --> 01:32:13,196 [whinnying] 1395 01:32:15,489 --> 01:32:17,450 [shouts] 1396 01:32:37,803 --> 01:32:39,305 Oh. 1397 01:32:48,940 --> 01:32:49,941 Oh. 1398 01:32:52,693 --> 01:32:54,362 [whinnying grows louder] 1399 01:32:54,445 --> 01:32:56,155 [cackling] 1400 01:32:59,533 --> 01:33:01,369 - No. - Get him. Get him. 1401 01:33:05,998 --> 01:33:10,920 [grunts, laughing] 1402 01:33:28,896 --> 01:33:30,481 [laughing] 1403 01:33:38,990 --> 01:33:41,325 [groaning] 1404 01:33:53,129 --> 01:33:55,631 [all grunting] 1405 01:34:02,179 --> 01:34:04,390 - [cheering] - Whee! 1406 01:34:40,217 --> 01:34:42,011 [men cackling] 1407 01:34:52,605 --> 01:34:56,317 [growling] 1408 01:35:17,838 --> 01:35:19,673 [cackling stops] 1409 01:35:29,517 --> 01:35:31,894 [wind whistling] 1410 01:35:31,977 --> 01:35:34,313 [Dennis gasping] 1411 01:35:37,983 --> 01:35:39,485 Oh! 1412 01:35:42,446 --> 01:35:44,281 Huh? 1413 01:35:44,365 --> 01:35:45,991 [whimpering] 1414 01:35:53,666 --> 01:35:58,003 [roaring] 1415 01:36:05,511 --> 01:36:07,847 - [shouts] - [roars] 1416 01:36:11,684 --> 01:36:13,978 [shrieking] 1417 01:37:20,711 --> 01:37:24,215 [stomping] 1418 01:37:24,298 --> 01:37:28,302 [growling] 1419 01:37:30,888 --> 01:37:33,516 [roars] 1420 01:37:47,738 --> 01:37:49,114 [groans] 1421 01:38:02,002 --> 01:38:04,171 [panting] 1422 01:38:09,927 --> 01:38:11,095 [shrieks] 1423 01:38:13,013 --> 01:38:15,599 [screaming] 1424 01:38:15,683 --> 01:38:17,560 [thuds] 1425 01:38:22,064 --> 01:38:24,149 [shrieking] 1426 01:38:34,743 --> 01:38:38,205 And hast thou slain the Jabberwock? 1427 01:38:38,289 --> 01:38:41,750 Come to my arms, my beamish boy. 1428 01:38:41,834 --> 01:38:45,379 - O frabjous day! - [man] The monster's dead! 1429 01:38:45,462 --> 01:38:49,466 - [woman] The monster's dead! - [cheering] 1430 01:39:19,079 --> 01:39:21,081 [loud cheering] 1431 01:39:22,333 --> 01:39:26,170 Stop! No one's to enter the city unless they have some money! 1432 01:39:26,253 --> 01:39:28,964 Stop, I say! Stop. 1433 01:39:43,020 --> 01:39:44,605 Oh, my God! 1434 01:39:44,688 --> 01:39:46,231 Aaah! Ooh! 1435 01:39:47,191 --> 01:39:51,945 Cancel those shipments of wine, grain, straw! Cancel everything! 1436 01:39:53,739 --> 01:39:55,324 [cheering] 1437 01:40:04,500 --> 01:40:06,293 Dennis! 1438 01:40:06,377 --> 01:40:09,922 - Dennis, here she is, Griselda. - Dennis, here I am! 1439 01:40:10,005 --> 01:40:12,966 Here I am! Whoo! Dennis! 1440 01:40:13,050 --> 01:40:14,551 It's me! 1441 01:40:15,552 --> 01:40:17,262 Dennis! 1442 01:40:17,346 --> 01:40:19,640 Dennis, it was always you! 1443 01:40:19,723 --> 01:40:22,226 You was the one we was always pushing for. 1444 01:40:22,309 --> 01:40:25,437 We'll have the wedding tomorrow, even this afternoon. 1445 01:40:25,521 --> 01:40:27,481 We'll get the bishop. 1446 01:40:29,108 --> 01:40:31,276 Dennis, you're wonderful. 1447 01:40:31,360 --> 01:40:34,780 Griselda, at last we can have the life we always wanted. 1448 01:40:36,949 --> 01:40:39,451 - [trumpet fanfare] - [cheering] 1449 01:40:51,296 --> 01:40:53,132 Ah. 1450 01:40:53,215 --> 01:40:55,259 [grunting] 1451 01:41:06,478 --> 01:41:09,565 My boy, congratulations. 1452 01:41:09,648 --> 01:41:12,276 We offer you our heartfelt thanks. 1453 01:41:12,359 --> 01:41:15,779 You have cleared the kingdom of a great menace. 1454 01:41:15,863 --> 01:41:19,950 And I am very happy to fulfill my promise 1455 01:41:20,033 --> 01:41:22,035 and to bestow upon you... 1456 01:41:22,119 --> 01:41:23,912 Uh, what's his name? 1457 01:41:23,996 --> 01:41:27,791 It's Dennis. Uh, Dennis Cooper, Your Royalshipness. 1458 01:41:27,875 --> 01:41:29,710 And that's his fiancée, my daughter. 1459 01:41:29,793 --> 01:41:32,254 Eh, you, Dennis, 1460 01:41:32,337 --> 01:41:34,715 one-half of my entire kingdom. 1461 01:41:34,798 --> 01:41:38,010 [all gasping] 1462 01:41:38,093 --> 01:41:42,139 And the hand in marriage of my daughter, the princess. 1463 01:41:43,265 --> 01:41:45,893 Come, my boy, to the palace. 1464 01:41:45,976 --> 01:41:47,853 - But... - Come. 1465 01:41:47,936 --> 01:41:51,106 - [Griselda] Oh! Oh! - Griselda. 1466 01:41:51,190 --> 01:41:52,983 [gasping] 1467 01:41:53,066 --> 01:41:56,361 - [bell tolling] - I pronounce you man and wife. 1468 01:41:56,445 --> 01:41:58,739 Prince and princess. 1469 01:41:59,615 --> 01:42:01,742 [crowd cheering] 1470 01:42:09,041 --> 01:42:12,753 [bell chiming] 1471 01:42:16,256 --> 01:42:18,217 Dennis! 1472 01:42:19,176 --> 01:42:21,261 Griselda! 1473 01:42:23,889 --> 01:42:27,017 Whose idea was it when you come up and you said... 1474 01:42:27,100 --> 01:42:28,435 - [crying] - Will you shut up? 1475 01:42:40,405 --> 01:42:42,699 Look out, sire! 1476 01:42:50,666 --> 01:42:52,292 [gate slams shut] 107968