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[woman] I felt like...
2
00:00:20,421 --> 00:00:22,054
like you were...
3
00:00:22,056 --> 00:00:25,124
you wanted to act like
nothing happened and
4
00:00:26,660 --> 00:00:28,260
everything was fine
5
00:00:28,262 --> 00:00:30,329
and we had to pretend
6
00:00:30,331 --> 00:00:33,599
we could get our life back.
7
00:00:36,737 --> 00:00:38,804
But, actually, I...
8
00:00:38,806 --> 00:00:42,441
I really suffered
from what happened and,
9
00:00:42,443 --> 00:00:48,047
and I think we shouldn't
pretend that it's OK and...
10
00:00:54,789 --> 00:00:56,588
and it hurts.
11
00:00:58,726 --> 00:01:00,325
And I...
12
00:01:01,695 --> 00:01:04,129
- [water trickling]
- [soft music playing]
13
00:01:43,838 --> 00:01:47,206
[woman voiceover] It's not
like I want to be like this.
14
00:01:47,208 --> 00:01:48,841
I don't want to be empty.
15
00:01:50,744 --> 00:01:52,578
That's the problem though.
16
00:01:52,580 --> 00:01:56,415
I was on full and
wanted to be empty
17
00:01:56,417 --> 00:01:59,151
and now I'm empty
and I want to be full.
18
00:02:18,772 --> 00:02:20,372
[man on phone] Hey.
19
00:02:20,374 --> 00:02:21,907
I have a bunch of
meetings today
20
00:02:21,909 --> 00:02:24,276
so I won't be able
to make our lunch
21
00:02:24,278 --> 00:02:25,911
but I will make a
reservation for tonight
22
00:02:25,913 --> 00:02:28,747
and have Lucy
send you the details.
23
00:02:28,749 --> 00:02:29,781
OK?
24
00:02:29,783 --> 00:02:31,216
Love you.
25
00:02:35,322 --> 00:02:37,589
[woman voiceover]
It's easier for you.
26
00:02:37,591 --> 00:02:39,758
You laugh at the same things,
27
00:02:39,760 --> 00:02:41,894
play racquetball
with your friends.
28
00:02:43,430 --> 00:02:46,798
You have a manageable,
normal sadness.
29
00:02:48,369 --> 00:02:50,836
I don't know how to
forgive you for that.
30
00:02:55,276 --> 00:02:57,409
Hey, Lucy, could you
please call the restaurant
31
00:02:57,411 --> 00:03:00,946
and change the reservation
for four for tonight?
32
00:03:02,716 --> 00:03:04,216
Great, thanks.
33
00:03:07,755 --> 00:03:11,890
[woman voiceover] I never
liked making long-term plans.
34
00:03:11,892 --> 00:03:14,393
It felt like looking
down at a road
35
00:03:14,395 --> 00:03:17,196
and knowing what's at the end.
36
00:03:17,198 --> 00:03:21,233
I used to be able to see
the end of the road clearly.
37
00:03:22,436 --> 00:03:25,370
Did my body simply
reject that plan?
38
00:04:02,810 --> 00:04:04,843
[Lucy] Is there anything
else I can do for you?
39
00:04:04,845 --> 00:04:08,647
Yes. Please, could you call
down to the front desk
40
00:04:08,649 --> 00:04:11,850
and let them know that my
friend, Greg, is coming.
41
00:04:11,852 --> 00:04:12,918
Just send them up.
42
00:04:13,988 --> 00:04:16,021
Oh, never mind.
43
00:04:16,023 --> 00:04:18,390
Hi. I'm Greg.
44
00:04:18,392 --> 00:04:19,891
Hi, Greg, I'm Lucy.
45
00:04:19,893 --> 00:04:20,892
Lucy.
46
00:04:20,894 --> 00:04:22,427
Very nice to meet you.
47
00:04:22,429 --> 00:04:24,329
Thank you, Lucy.
48
00:04:33,907 --> 00:04:36,275
Has Marin seen her?
49
00:04:36,277 --> 00:04:37,776
Yep.
50
00:04:37,778 --> 00:04:38,944
Goodness.
51
00:04:39,913 --> 00:04:40,912
I mean, the legs?
52
00:04:40,914 --> 00:04:42,914
Everything about her.
53
00:04:42,916 --> 00:04:45,751
Where'd you find her, on Eros?
54
00:04:45,753 --> 00:04:47,619
I mean, seriously, how do you
get any amount of work done
55
00:04:47,621 --> 00:04:49,488
with that sitting 20
feet from your desk?
56
00:04:49,490 --> 00:04:51,923
If Emily knew I had an
assistant that looked like that,
57
00:04:51,925 --> 00:04:53,925
- she'd kill me.
- [chuckling]
58
00:04:53,927 --> 00:04:55,327
Is she single?
59
00:04:55,329 --> 00:04:56,928
Why do you care, you're married.
60
00:04:56,930 --> 00:04:58,497
Yeah.
61
00:05:01,402 --> 00:05:04,603
[camera snapping]
62
00:05:14,081 --> 00:05:15,314
Ah!
63
00:05:15,316 --> 00:05:16,982
So glad to see you.
64
00:05:18,485 --> 00:05:19,818
I have to finish
pulling a couple looks.
65
00:05:19,820 --> 00:05:20,886
You can help me.
66
00:05:22,956 --> 00:05:24,056
[Marin] That's pretty.
67
00:05:25,993 --> 00:05:27,659
Yes.
68
00:05:30,631 --> 00:05:31,697
So sexy.
69
00:05:33,567 --> 00:05:36,935
God, I wanna come back
as her in my next life.
70
00:05:36,937 --> 00:05:38,470
What legs.
71
00:05:38,472 --> 00:05:40,872
[Isabel] Jesus, so beautiful.
72
00:05:41,809 --> 00:05:43,408
Oh, one second.
73
00:05:48,449 --> 00:05:51,850
Hey, do you mind if
I jump in real quick?
74
00:05:51,852 --> 00:05:53,051
OK, looks fantastic.
75
00:05:53,053 --> 00:05:54,486
Just want to...
76
00:05:58,926 --> 00:06:00,425
Thank you.
77
00:06:04,131 --> 00:06:05,564
You wanna try one on?
78
00:06:05,566 --> 00:06:06,665
They look so real.
79
00:06:06,667 --> 00:06:09,134
You'd look so good in that one.
80
00:06:09,136 --> 00:06:11,470
Hey, do you have plans tonight?
81
00:06:11,472 --> 00:06:13,505
I'm here all day but I'm
hanging out with Sasha
82
00:06:13,507 --> 00:06:14,840
and a few of her friends
at a bar downtown.
83
00:06:14,842 --> 00:06:15,907
Come with.
84
00:06:15,909 --> 00:06:17,576
No, I have dinner with Mark.
85
00:06:17,578 --> 00:06:19,478
But any other night, I'm OK.
86
00:06:19,480 --> 00:06:22,814
Tomorrow, it's
Francesca's birthday.
87
00:06:22,816 --> 00:06:24,449
I know that you've
heard me talk about her
88
00:06:24,451 --> 00:06:27,953
and she's definitely
heard me talk about you.
89
00:06:27,955 --> 00:06:30,021
- Yeah, sure.
- Excellent.
90
00:06:30,023 --> 00:06:32,391
Ugh, I need a real night out.
91
00:06:32,393 --> 00:06:33,625
Come on, you have
real nights out
92
00:06:33,627 --> 00:06:35,427
like every other
night of the weak.
93
00:06:35,429 --> 00:06:36,661
Oh, my God. [laughing]
94
00:06:36,663 --> 00:06:38,163
Are you ready to laugh?
95
00:06:38,165 --> 00:06:39,564
Uh-huh.
96
00:06:39,566 --> 00:06:42,467
So, you remember
that erotica book
97
00:06:42,469 --> 00:06:44,469
I wanted you to read
a few years ago?
98
00:06:44,471 --> 00:06:45,971
You know,
99
00:06:45,973 --> 00:06:47,005
my brain.
100
00:06:47,007 --> 00:06:49,174
"The Story of the Eye."
101
00:06:49,176 --> 00:06:50,876
You're gonna die.
102
00:06:50,878 --> 00:06:53,779
So last night I go for
drinks with this guy that
103
00:06:53,781 --> 00:06:56,114
Daniella wanted to set
me up with a while back.
104
00:06:56,116 --> 00:06:57,449
He's cute, whatever.
105
00:06:57,451 --> 00:06:58,784
He can't keep up.
106
00:06:58,786 --> 00:07:00,685
So we end up at his place
107
00:07:00,687 --> 00:07:05,090
and he's got these cat drawings
hanging up in his hallway.
108
00:07:05,092 --> 00:07:07,526
So I ask him about them
109
00:07:07,528 --> 00:07:10,862
and, of course, I mention
"The Story of the Eye,"
110
00:07:10,864 --> 00:07:14,533
and he just looks at me,
gets up and he leaves.
111
00:07:14,535 --> 00:07:16,501
Comes back two seconds later
112
00:07:16,503 --> 00:07:18,970
and he's got this
saucepan of milk.
113
00:07:18,972 --> 00:07:23,074
He places it on the floor and
tells me to get undressed.
114
00:07:23,076 --> 00:07:24,776
[laughing]
115
00:07:24,778 --> 00:07:26,445
You know me, I'll do
anything for a good story.
116
00:07:26,447 --> 00:07:28,447
So I'm like, "Well, OK."
117
00:07:28,449 --> 00:07:31,016
So I take off all my
clothes and he goes,
118
00:07:31,018 --> 00:07:35,520
"Be a good little kitty cat
and dip that pussy in the milk
119
00:07:35,522 --> 00:07:38,857
and crawl towards me
so I can lick it off."
120
00:07:38,859 --> 00:07:40,459
No.
121
00:07:40,461 --> 00:07:42,093
"And don't forget to purr."
122
00:07:42,095 --> 00:07:44,095
[laughing]
123
00:07:44,097 --> 00:07:45,664
Oh my God.
124
00:07:45,666 --> 00:07:47,799
The best part,
he has to use almond milk
125
00:07:47,801 --> 00:07:50,168
because he lactose intolerant.
126
00:07:50,170 --> 00:07:52,704
Jesus Christ,
I'm completely traumatized.
127
00:07:52,706 --> 00:07:54,739
I'm ready to go back to women.
128
00:07:54,741 --> 00:07:57,142
Ugh.
129
00:07:57,144 --> 00:07:59,110
Aw. I thought you would
think that was funny.
130
00:07:59,112 --> 00:08:00,479
I do.
131
00:08:00,481 --> 00:08:01,480
I did.
132
00:08:01,482 --> 00:08:02,614
I am sorry, I'm...
133
00:08:02,616 --> 00:08:05,951
You need a good night out, girl.
134
00:08:05,953 --> 00:08:07,519
OK.
135
00:08:07,521 --> 00:08:09,054
I'm gonna leave you,
this is beautiful.
136
00:08:09,056 --> 00:08:10,689
- Thank you.
- Congrats.
137
00:08:10,691 --> 00:08:11,857
And so, tomorrow?
138
00:08:11,859 --> 00:08:12,924
Mm-hmm.
139
00:08:12,926 --> 00:08:14,960
- See you soon.
- Bye.
140
00:08:17,564 --> 00:08:19,865
[Marin voiceover]
Maybe if I pretended I'm happy
141
00:08:19,867 --> 00:08:21,867
that would convince
you that I'm OK
142
00:08:21,869 --> 00:08:25,070
and you'd stop asking
me if I feel better.
143
00:08:25,072 --> 00:08:29,908
But constantly asking me
is making me feel worse.
144
00:08:29,910 --> 00:08:32,143
["Breath Control"
by John Forté playing]
145
00:08:34,281 --> 00:08:36,982
[woman]
♪ Have life inside your body ♪
146
00:08:39,520 --> 00:08:41,186
♪ Have life inside your body ♪
147
00:08:41,188 --> 00:08:43,255
♪ Now, now ♪
148
00:08:44,625 --> 00:08:46,057
♪ Have life inside your body ♪
149
00:08:46,059 --> 00:08:47,859
[man]
♪ Respectable appeal, right ♪
150
00:08:47,861 --> 00:08:49,160
♪ This is something you
should feel, right ♪
151
00:08:49,162 --> 00:08:50,829
♪ Like a killer in the B ♪
152
00:08:50,831 --> 00:08:52,264
♪ Close your eyes in the movie ♪
153
00:08:52,266 --> 00:08:54,099
♪ The way things are ordered ♪
154
00:08:54,101 --> 00:08:56,134
♪ You remember me and
those killers from the B ♪
155
00:08:56,136 --> 00:08:59,237
♪ Study life in plain
sight, my plain's late ♪
156
00:08:59,239 --> 00:09:02,274
♪ Living life, you look
like you gained weight ♪
157
00:09:02,276 --> 00:09:04,042
♪ Here and now with
the same date ♪
158
00:09:04,044 --> 00:09:07,712
♪ Too fast to bring
down the frame rate ♪
159
00:09:11,184 --> 00:09:13,752
♪ Rest your lawless
your breath control ♪
160
00:09:13,754 --> 00:09:15,120
♪ Far from innocent ♪
161
00:09:15,122 --> 00:09:16,888
♪ In a sense,
it left your soul ♪
162
00:09:16,890 --> 00:09:18,557
♪ Rest your lawless
your breath control ♪
163
00:09:18,559 --> 00:09:19,925
♪ Far from innocent ♪
164
00:09:19,927 --> 00:09:21,693
♪ In a sense,
it left your soul ♪
165
00:09:21,695 --> 00:09:23,662
♪ Rest your lawless
your breath control ♪
166
00:09:23,664 --> 00:09:25,063
♪ Far from innocent ♪
167
00:09:25,065 --> 00:09:26,965
♪ In a sense,
it left your soul ♪
168
00:09:26,967 --> 00:09:29,200
[woman] And you feel
the tide of your breath.
169
00:09:32,973 --> 00:09:36,708
Hi, yeah, can I place
an order for delivery?
170
00:09:36,710 --> 00:09:37,976
Yeah, Marin.
171
00:09:57,631 --> 00:09:59,164
[phone chiming]
172
00:10:35,302 --> 00:10:36,368
[doorbell ringing]
173
00:10:36,370 --> 00:10:37,769
Yeah!
174
00:10:48,649 --> 00:10:50,949
Thank you.
I don't need change.
175
00:10:54,187 --> 00:10:55,720
I don't know what to do, man.
176
00:10:55,722 --> 00:10:57,856
She just doesn't want
to talk about it.
177
00:10:57,858 --> 00:11:00,792
You guys still
spending time together?
178
00:11:00,794 --> 00:11:02,861
Yeah, we're having
dinner tonight
179
00:11:02,863 --> 00:11:06,965
but I guarantee you
I will be going home alone.
180
00:11:06,967 --> 00:11:10,335
I can't touch her
without her pulling away.
181
00:11:10,337 --> 00:11:11,836
What happened to Emily,
182
00:11:11,838 --> 00:11:13,238
she acted like
everything was fine
183
00:11:13,240 --> 00:11:15,807
then had a meltdown
three weeks later.
184
00:11:15,809 --> 00:11:18,309
We used to be able to
talk about anything.
185
00:11:18,311 --> 00:11:20,311
Now everything I say is wrong.
186
00:11:20,313 --> 00:11:21,913
Just keep giving her space.
187
00:11:21,915 --> 00:11:24,349
She sees a therapist,
talks to Isabel.
188
00:11:24,351 --> 00:11:26,418
I'm sure she'll be OK...
189
00:11:26,420 --> 00:11:27,919
eventually.
190
00:11:30,957 --> 00:11:33,358
[Marin voiceover]
A painter will layer a canvas,
191
00:11:33,360 --> 00:11:34,993
paint on paint,
192
00:11:34,995 --> 00:11:37,429
until she finds the
texture she was wants,
193
00:11:37,431 --> 00:11:41,366
the shape and
desired elimination.
194
00:11:41,368 --> 00:11:43,368
Is that what I'm doing?
195
00:11:43,370 --> 00:11:45,870
Am I painting the layers
196
00:11:45,872 --> 00:11:48,173
or am I trying to
strip them off?
197
00:12:23,410 --> 00:12:25,110
[phone chiming]
198
00:12:27,380 --> 00:12:28,947
[Marin] Shit.
199
00:12:39,459 --> 00:12:41,025
[laughing]
200
00:12:41,027 --> 00:12:42,794
[man] Can we have
some more standup?
201
00:12:42,796 --> 00:12:44,395
No, I told him...
202
00:12:44,397 --> 00:12:47,332
[muffled speaking]
203
00:12:48,435 --> 00:12:51,469
[ominous music playing]
204
00:12:57,344 --> 00:12:58,843
[Marin voiceover]
I can't tell if I'm dreaming
205
00:12:58,845 --> 00:13:00,278
and everyone is awake,
206
00:13:00,280 --> 00:13:03,414
or if am I awake and
they're all dreaming.
207
00:13:04,918 --> 00:13:07,018
Sometimes I just
want to scream.
208
00:13:08,188 --> 00:13:10,054
If I did, would you hear me?
209
00:13:10,056 --> 00:13:13,057
Is my silence
comforting to you?
210
00:13:19,332 --> 00:13:21,432
[man] This thing
is perfect, right?
211
00:13:21,434 --> 00:13:23,434
It can run with you,
212
00:13:23,436 --> 00:13:25,470
it can hunt,
213
00:13:25,472 --> 00:13:26,504
if you did a lot of hunting.
214
00:13:26,506 --> 00:13:28,006
[woman] Maybe.
215
00:13:28,008 --> 00:13:29,407
[man] But, like,
it can be a watchdog.
216
00:13:29,409 --> 00:13:31,176
Whatever you want,
the thing is perfect.
217
00:13:31,178 --> 00:13:33,912
But we all know that Jasmine
is not gonna be happy
218
00:13:33,914 --> 00:13:36,948
with just any Australian
Labradoodle, right?
219
00:13:36,950 --> 00:13:40,585
It has to be a chocolate...
220
00:13:40,587 --> 00:13:43,321
Mini Australian
Labradoodle, right?
221
00:13:43,323 --> 00:13:46,457
From this one breeder
in South Carolina.
222
00:13:46,459 --> 00:13:48,827
[muffled speaking]
223
00:14:02,576 --> 00:14:04,475
Hey.
224
00:14:04,477 --> 00:14:06,978
I'm so, so sorry.
225
00:14:06,980 --> 00:14:09,914
When Ben and I went
through this two years ago,
226
00:14:09,916 --> 00:14:11,282
it was heartbreaking.
227
00:14:11,284 --> 00:14:13,017
I just couldn't
even get out of bed,
228
00:14:13,019 --> 00:14:16,020
so I totally know where
you're coming from.
229
00:14:16,022 --> 00:14:18,189
But it helps to go out
and be out with friends
230
00:14:18,191 --> 00:14:19,524
like you are now, really.
231
00:14:19,526 --> 00:14:22,460
So don't sweat it,
you'll be fine.
232
00:14:23,330 --> 00:14:24,896
If you ever need to talk.
233
00:14:27,901 --> 00:14:29,500
[Marin] Jasmine's your friend.
234
00:14:29,502 --> 00:14:31,069
So what she had a miscarriage.
235
00:14:31,071 --> 00:14:33,438
So does that make
her a therapist?
236
00:14:33,440 --> 00:14:36,975
Does that make her
my therapist?
237
00:14:36,977 --> 00:14:38,643
Who does she think
she is to just like
238
00:14:38,645 --> 00:14:40,278
casually bring up my miscarriage
239
00:14:40,280 --> 00:14:41,546
when you and Ben were
talking about whatever...
240
00:14:41,548 --> 00:14:43,381
We weren't talking about...
241
00:14:43,383 --> 00:14:46,384
Who do you think you're telling
her about my miscarriage?
242
00:14:46,386 --> 00:14:47,518
Who else knows?
243
00:14:47,520 --> 00:14:48,920
Greg?
244
00:14:48,922 --> 00:14:50,188
The rest of your friends?
Lucy?
245
00:14:50,190 --> 00:14:52,957
- Mar, she cares about you.
- Oh.
246
00:14:52,959 --> 00:14:54,292
She cares about us and she
was just trying to help.
247
00:14:54,294 --> 00:14:55,526
Would this have
been a coincidence?
248
00:14:55,528 --> 00:14:56,995
Look, I am just...
249
00:14:56,997 --> 00:14:58,630
You know what,
I don't even care.
250
00:14:58,632 --> 00:15:00,064
I'm going home.
251
00:15:10,543 --> 00:15:13,278
[clicking]
252
00:15:26,559 --> 00:15:28,693
[rustling]
253
00:15:38,571 --> 00:15:41,105
[buzzing]
254
00:15:42,642 --> 00:15:45,109
[sighing]
255
00:16:43,136 --> 00:16:46,471
[Marin] I can't even imagine
how I would start a conversation
256
00:16:46,473 --> 00:16:48,673
and then when he
tries to start it,
257
00:16:48,675 --> 00:16:51,142
my ears start to close and I...
258
00:16:51,144 --> 00:16:53,578
I just don't have any interest.
259
00:16:53,580 --> 00:16:56,180
[woman] But you do realize
that this isn't gonna end
260
00:16:56,182 --> 00:16:58,049
until you open up.
261
00:17:01,488 --> 00:17:03,721
Yeah but he doesn't get
what it is like for me.
262
00:17:03,723 --> 00:17:05,323
[woman] Well maybe
because he doesn't know
263
00:17:05,325 --> 00:17:07,191
you already had two abortions.
264
00:17:09,596 --> 00:17:12,764
[traffic commotion]
265
00:17:15,668 --> 00:17:17,668
You want me to open up to him.
266
00:17:17,670 --> 00:17:19,470
You want me to let him in.
267
00:17:23,176 --> 00:17:25,209
How can I do that if
I don't even understand
268
00:17:25,211 --> 00:17:28,579
why I'm grieving for
a baby I didn't even want?
269
00:17:28,581 --> 00:17:31,616
[woman] You've suffered
a very traumatic experience
270
00:17:31,618 --> 00:17:35,219
and isolating yourself is not
gonna make it easier for him.
271
00:17:37,590 --> 00:17:39,624
So, what, you want
me to go and say,
272
00:17:39,626 --> 00:17:42,827
"Hey, Mark, stop looking at
me with those sad puppy eyes.
273
00:17:42,829 --> 00:17:44,495
I didn't even want a baby.
274
00:17:44,497 --> 00:17:47,198
I just did it because
you wanted one so badly?"
275
00:18:05,085 --> 00:18:07,251
It's really not of interest.
Sorry.
276
00:18:07,253 --> 00:18:08,719
Sorry to bother you.
277
00:18:08,721 --> 00:18:10,721
There's a woman
downstairs named Michelle.
278
00:18:10,723 --> 00:18:12,623
She wants to come up.
279
00:18:12,625 --> 00:18:13,658
Yeah, that's my mom.
280
00:18:13,660 --> 00:18:15,159
You can send her up.
281
00:18:20,500 --> 00:18:21,833
Hey.
282
00:18:21,835 --> 00:18:24,235
Yeah, sorry.
283
00:18:24,237 --> 00:18:25,503
What were you saying?
284
00:18:28,408 --> 00:18:29,807
OK.
285
00:18:29,809 --> 00:18:31,676
Sweetheart, get off the
phone and give me a hug!
286
00:18:31,678 --> 00:18:33,678
I'll have to call
you back. OK, bye.
287
00:18:33,680 --> 00:18:35,546
- Hi.
- Hi, honey.
288
00:18:36,749 --> 00:18:37,849
Listen, I know I'm early.
289
00:18:37,851 --> 00:18:39,784
Can I get you anything to drink?
290
00:18:39,786 --> 00:18:42,286
Oh no, we're fine, dear.
291
00:18:42,288 --> 00:18:43,521
Thank you, Lucy.
292
00:18:45,358 --> 00:18:46,724
I need to talk to you.
293
00:18:55,502 --> 00:18:56,701
So,
294
00:18:57,570 --> 00:18:58,736
how is she?
295
00:19:00,340 --> 00:19:03,641
She's great.
She's almost back to normal.
296
00:19:04,844 --> 00:19:07,411
Where do you wanna eat?
297
00:19:07,413 --> 00:19:11,182
You forget, I raised
you and three daughters.
298
00:19:12,252 --> 00:19:14,185
Is she still not talking to you?
299
00:19:15,421 --> 00:19:17,889
I know what I'm doing, OK?
300
00:19:17,891 --> 00:19:21,392
I know Mar and I am fixing this.
301
00:19:21,394 --> 00:19:23,694
"Fixing this?"
302
00:19:23,696 --> 00:19:24,795
She lost a child.
303
00:19:24,797 --> 00:19:27,598
You lost a child.
304
00:19:27,600 --> 00:19:31,802
This isn't a
distressed debt buyout.
305
00:19:31,804 --> 00:19:33,304
This is your family.
306
00:19:33,306 --> 00:19:34,672
You know what I mean.
307
00:19:36,843 --> 00:19:38,509
Is she still seeing her shrink?
308
00:19:38,511 --> 00:19:41,546
Yes... I think.
309
00:19:41,548 --> 00:19:44,849
Well maybe you two should
go see someone together.
310
00:19:44,851 --> 00:19:46,617
Or I could talk to her.
311
00:19:46,619 --> 00:19:48,519
No.
312
00:19:48,521 --> 00:19:50,188
Thank you.
313
00:19:50,190 --> 00:19:52,590
No, you're not talking
to her about any of this.
314
00:19:52,592 --> 00:19:54,959
Actually,
315
00:19:54,961 --> 00:19:56,561
I'm serious, Mom.
316
00:20:19,786 --> 00:20:22,787
[Marin voiceover]
I'm tired of being in my head.
317
00:20:22,789 --> 00:20:26,857
When I look at myself,
I see negative space,
318
00:20:26,859 --> 00:20:28,659
everything that's missing.
319
00:20:30,597 --> 00:20:33,731
I wish I could see myself
through someone else's eyes.
320
00:20:39,339 --> 00:20:41,572
[crowd chattering]
321
00:20:43,810 --> 00:20:44,875
- Hi.
- Hey.
322
00:20:44,877 --> 00:20:46,410
Look at you.
323
00:20:47,280 --> 00:20:48,846
Marin, this is Francesca.
324
00:20:48,848 --> 00:20:50,615
Hi.
325
00:20:50,617 --> 00:20:52,683
Jesus, I can't believe you
guys still haven't met.
326
00:20:52,685 --> 00:20:54,285
Yeah, I know,
it's great to meet you.
327
00:20:54,287 --> 00:20:55,853
I've heard so much from her.
328
00:20:55,855 --> 00:20:57,822
Well, thank you for letting
me crash your party.
329
00:20:57,824 --> 00:20:59,023
Of course.
330
00:20:59,025 --> 00:21:01,359
I also need you to meet.
331
00:21:01,361 --> 00:21:02,627
Remember, this is...
332
00:21:02,629 --> 00:21:04,595
[all] Hey.
333
00:21:04,597 --> 00:21:05,930
And shots.
334
00:21:05,932 --> 00:21:07,965
We definitely need
birthday shots.
335
00:21:07,967 --> 00:21:09,767
[muffled speaking]
336
00:21:15,808 --> 00:21:17,875
On me, yeah.
337
00:21:17,877 --> 00:21:18,909
[woman] Shots, ladies.
338
00:21:18,911 --> 00:21:20,378
Yeah.
339
00:21:25,818 --> 00:21:27,985
[people chattering]
340
00:21:31,724 --> 00:21:34,025
- Hey.
- Oh.
341
00:21:34,027 --> 00:21:35,660
Oh, yeah,
342
00:21:35,662 --> 00:21:37,862
I tried but Marin has
this birthday thing
343
00:21:37,864 --> 00:21:41,032
with Isabel tonight, so I do
not think she's gonna make it.
344
00:21:41,034 --> 00:21:42,867
All right.
345
00:21:44,937 --> 00:21:45,970
Hi.
346
00:21:45,972 --> 00:21:48,072
[people chattering]
347
00:21:58,084 --> 00:22:00,451
[Marin voiceover]
When love is new,
348
00:22:00,453 --> 00:22:02,053
the world disappears.
349
00:22:03,089 --> 00:22:05,456
Nothing else seems to matter.
350
00:22:06,392 --> 00:22:08,092
You are entirely
inside your body
351
00:22:08,094 --> 00:22:10,494
and outside of it
at the same time.
352
00:22:12,365 --> 00:22:13,931
I want that feeling again.
353
00:22:17,036 --> 00:22:19,437
You didn't tell me she
was that beautiful.
354
00:22:19,439 --> 00:22:21,872
[giggling]
355
00:22:33,920 --> 00:22:35,786
[cheering]
356
00:22:49,969 --> 00:22:52,770
[Marin voiceover] I just
want to touch someone new.
357
00:22:53,706 --> 00:22:56,374
We have too much history.
358
00:22:56,376 --> 00:22:59,076
Will I always feel this way?
I don't know.
359
00:22:59,078 --> 00:23:04,048
But now I need someone who isn't
yearning for who I used to be.
360
00:23:46,559 --> 00:23:50,194
What would you do if
you were single again?
361
00:23:50,196 --> 00:23:52,196
What would I do?
362
00:23:52,198 --> 00:23:53,731
I don't know.
363
00:23:55,535 --> 00:23:57,701
I just want to feel
desirable again.
364
00:24:14,086 --> 00:24:15,586
Is this seat taken?
365
00:24:20,226 --> 00:24:21,225
Hi, I'm Rachel.
366
00:24:21,227 --> 00:24:22,927
Hi, Rachel, I'm Mark.
367
00:24:22,929 --> 00:24:24,628
- Nice to meet you.
- Nice to meet you.
368
00:24:24,630 --> 00:24:26,764
- Hey, I'm Greg.
- Hi.
369
00:24:26,766 --> 00:24:29,633
You don't wanna waste your
time talking to this one.
370
00:24:29,635 --> 00:24:32,069
What does that mean?
371
00:24:32,071 --> 00:24:34,071
That means that
I have a girlfriend.
372
00:24:34,073 --> 00:24:36,040
But why isn't she
here right now?
373
00:24:36,042 --> 00:24:38,042
♪ Truth be told ♪
374
00:24:38,044 --> 00:24:40,978
♪ What do you know of me ♪
375
00:24:40,980 --> 00:24:45,616
♪ Love, your love
will grow for me ♪
376
00:24:45,618 --> 00:24:48,185
["Your Love Will Grow For Me"
by Sophie Hiller playing]
377
00:25:39,605 --> 00:25:40,971
[phone beeping]
378
00:25:40,973 --> 00:25:42,139
[Marin on phone]
I know that you're going
379
00:25:42,141 --> 00:25:43,807
to Connecticut today.
380
00:25:43,809 --> 00:25:46,710
Please, say hello to
your mother and sisters.
381
00:25:46,712 --> 00:25:47,945
Have a good time.
382
00:26:11,938 --> 00:26:13,771
[wings fluttering]
383
00:26:33,659 --> 00:26:37,161
[Marin voiceover] This is not the life
I would have chosen for myself
384
00:26:37,163 --> 00:26:42,800
but you were loving and sweet
and you wanted it so much.
385
00:26:42,802 --> 00:26:46,637
It was like giving a part
of myself to your dream.
386
00:27:13,032 --> 00:27:15,966
When you're in pain
and afraid of something
387
00:27:15,968 --> 00:27:18,669
you'll do anything to
make the pain stop.
388
00:27:19,872 --> 00:27:22,406
I've succeeded in
making the pain stop
389
00:27:23,743 --> 00:27:25,976
but it just left me numb.
390
00:27:30,082 --> 00:27:32,016
[piano music plays]
391
00:28:02,748 --> 00:28:04,114
Thank you.
392
00:28:08,354 --> 00:28:11,455
[phone chiming]
393
00:28:13,325 --> 00:28:14,925
What?
394
00:28:19,331 --> 00:28:21,832
[people chattering]
395
00:28:49,361 --> 00:28:51,495
[sighing]
396
00:29:09,482 --> 00:29:11,148
[man] Hi, I'm Jonas.
397
00:29:15,321 --> 00:29:16,854
Anna.
398
00:29:16,856 --> 00:29:19,289
[Jonas]
Hey, it's nice to meet you.
399
00:29:19,291 --> 00:29:20,824
You too.
400
00:29:23,462 --> 00:29:25,829
So, um...
401
00:29:25,831 --> 00:29:28,365
hotel bar, Friday night,
all alone.
402
00:29:30,402 --> 00:29:32,369
You're not working, are you?
403
00:29:35,474 --> 00:29:37,407
Were you waiting for someone?
404
00:29:37,409 --> 00:29:38,776
Professional, maybe?
405
00:29:38,778 --> 00:29:41,411
[laughing]
406
00:29:44,450 --> 00:29:45,516
- No.
- No?
407
00:29:45,518 --> 00:29:48,485
Actually I am...
408
00:29:48,487 --> 00:29:51,855
I'm in town for a night for
my friend's gallery show.
409
00:29:53,292 --> 00:29:54,958
It's nearby.
410
00:29:54,960 --> 00:29:56,460
You should get a drink
and then come with me.
411
00:29:56,462 --> 00:29:58,061
What do you want?
412
00:30:02,067 --> 00:30:03,567
Well,
413
00:30:03,569 --> 00:30:06,303
I'll have a tequila
414
00:30:06,305 --> 00:30:08,172
with soda and lime.
415
00:30:08,174 --> 00:30:10,474
Mostly with soda
and lime, actually.
416
00:30:12,812 --> 00:30:16,213
Hey, sorry, can we
get a lime and soda
417
00:30:16,215 --> 00:30:18,448
with just a splash
of tequila, please?
418
00:30:18,450 --> 00:30:19,817
Thank you.
419
00:30:21,554 --> 00:30:24,388
So when are you
going back to Paris?
420
00:30:24,390 --> 00:30:27,457
What makes you think
I live in Paris?
421
00:30:27,459 --> 00:30:29,493
[laughing]
422
00:30:29,495 --> 00:30:31,595
No, I live here.
423
00:30:31,597 --> 00:30:33,330
Yeah.
424
00:30:36,468 --> 00:30:38,302
Thank you.
425
00:30:38,304 --> 00:30:39,903
Well.
426
00:30:44,176 --> 00:30:46,877
Um, do you like art?
427
00:30:46,879 --> 00:30:48,212
Mm-hmm.
428
00:30:49,481 --> 00:30:52,282
Yes, I went to art school.
429
00:30:52,284 --> 00:30:55,886
So I prefer looking
at it to analyzing it.
430
00:30:56,589 --> 00:30:57,955
Don't worry...
431
00:30:57,957 --> 00:31:00,290
[inaudible dialogue]
432
00:31:14,640 --> 00:31:16,373
[chattering]
433
00:31:25,251 --> 00:31:27,584
Why don't you take a look around
while I go get us some drinks?
434
00:31:27,586 --> 00:31:32,356
Oh, and really try
not to steal anything.
435
00:31:32,358 --> 00:31:33,390
OK.
436
00:31:33,392 --> 00:31:35,092
[chuckling]
437
00:32:00,653 --> 00:32:02,219
Oh, thank you.
438
00:32:02,221 --> 00:32:04,121
You know that's me, right?
439
00:32:05,424 --> 00:32:06,690
Yes.
440
00:32:06,692 --> 00:32:08,959
- You can't see my Speedo
- [laughing]
441
00:32:08,961 --> 00:32:11,395
in this picture but it was...
442
00:32:11,397 --> 00:32:12,496
Tiny.
443
00:32:12,498 --> 00:32:14,598
It was pretty compromising.
444
00:32:14,600 --> 00:32:16,500
[footsteps thumping]
445
00:32:17,636 --> 00:32:19,536
Oh, hey, you wanna
meet my friend?
446
00:32:19,538 --> 00:32:21,138
Oh yes, sure.
447
00:32:24,310 --> 00:32:26,109
[laughing]
448
00:32:26,111 --> 00:32:27,544
Thank you guys for coming, OK?
449
00:32:27,546 --> 00:32:28,412
Take care.
450
00:32:28,414 --> 00:32:29,947
Sorry.
451
00:32:29,949 --> 00:32:31,181
- Hey, man.
- How're you doing, man?
452
00:32:31,183 --> 00:32:32,482
- Good to see you!
- Good to see you.
453
00:32:32,484 --> 00:32:33,717
- Yeah, thanks, man.
- Congratulations.
454
00:32:33,719 --> 00:32:35,585
Thanks for coming,
I appreciate it.
455
00:32:35,587 --> 00:32:36,687
- Hey, there's somebody you should meet.
- Hi, I'm Anna.
456
00:32:36,689 --> 00:32:38,188
Anna, nice to meet you.
457
00:32:38,190 --> 00:32:39,256
You taking care
of this guy, here?
458
00:32:39,258 --> 00:32:40,324
Because you gotta watch him.
459
00:32:40,326 --> 00:32:41,391
No, strangely, she's not.
460
00:32:41,393 --> 00:32:42,359
No, yeah.
461
00:32:42,361 --> 00:32:43,627
You know.
462
00:32:43,629 --> 00:32:45,062
Could you take
care of me please?
463
00:32:45,064 --> 00:32:46,163
No.
Your photos are beautiful.
464
00:32:46,165 --> 00:32:47,064
Thank you, I appreciate that.
465
00:32:47,066 --> 00:32:47,998
They're OK.
466
00:32:48,000 --> 00:32:49,733
- Yeah.
- Well.
467
00:32:49,735 --> 00:32:52,169
And I guess it's a long way
from Bolivia to here, isn't it?
468
00:32:52,171 --> 00:32:53,403
You tell her about everything?
469
00:32:53,405 --> 00:32:55,439
- Not everything.
- Thank you.
470
00:32:55,441 --> 00:32:57,441
Excuse me.
471
00:32:57,443 --> 00:32:58,742
OK, all right.
472
00:32:58,744 --> 00:33:00,210
Sorry, I'll be right back.
473
00:33:00,212 --> 00:33:01,345
- OK.
- Sure.
474
00:33:01,347 --> 00:33:02,412
Thank you.
475
00:33:02,414 --> 00:33:03,613
He's nice.
476
00:33:04,683 --> 00:33:06,249
Yeah, he's really nice.
477
00:33:06,251 --> 00:33:08,051
You know what,
let's get out of here.
478
00:33:08,053 --> 00:33:09,653
OK, wait, no. Wait.
479
00:33:09,655 --> 00:33:12,990
- Wait, wait, wait, wait.
- Let's go, let's go, let's go.
480
00:33:15,661 --> 00:33:18,562
So, did you get stood up
481
00:33:18,564 --> 00:33:22,299
or do you just like hanging
out in hotel bars all alone?
482
00:33:22,301 --> 00:33:26,036
Yeah, no, I don't usually
hang out in hotel bars alone.
483
00:33:27,172 --> 00:33:28,472
Is he your boyfriend?
484
00:33:28,474 --> 00:33:30,240
No.
485
00:33:30,242 --> 00:33:33,377
A friend from out of town.
486
00:33:33,379 --> 00:33:35,612
His flight got messed up.
487
00:33:35,614 --> 00:33:38,648
Or he just flaked, I don't know.
It doesn't matter.
488
00:33:38,650 --> 00:33:39,783
Is he your ex?
489
00:33:40,652 --> 00:33:42,652
Something like that.
490
00:33:42,654 --> 00:33:44,388
You ask a lot of questions.
491
00:33:44,390 --> 00:33:46,056
I don't ask a lot of questions.
492
00:33:46,058 --> 00:33:48,025
I ask, you know, just
like the good questions.
493
00:33:48,027 --> 00:33:49,459
Yeah.
494
00:33:49,461 --> 00:33:51,028
So were you planning
on sleeping with him?
495
00:33:51,030 --> 00:33:53,130
What?
496
00:33:53,132 --> 00:33:55,298
You don't look
like you're dressed
497
00:33:55,300 --> 00:33:56,733
to catch up with an old friend.
498
00:33:56,735 --> 00:33:58,702
You look like you're
dressed for a date.
499
00:34:02,174 --> 00:34:06,376
I wouldn't say I'd plan on it
500
00:34:06,378 --> 00:34:09,479
but I wouldn't say I plan
on much the last few months.
501
00:34:11,250 --> 00:34:13,083
What does that mean?
502
00:34:14,253 --> 00:34:16,453
OK, tell me something
about yourself.
503
00:34:19,458 --> 00:34:22,759
OK, well, would it
be too forward to say
504
00:34:22,761 --> 00:34:27,264
that I really, really,
505
00:34:27,266 --> 00:34:29,199
really wanna kiss you?
506
00:34:29,201 --> 00:34:30,233
[chuckling]
507
00:34:30,235 --> 00:34:31,668
Don't spoil everything.
508
00:34:31,670 --> 00:34:34,137
- Oh.
- OK, where are we going?
509
00:34:34,139 --> 00:34:36,706
We're gonna get another drink.
510
00:34:36,708 --> 00:34:39,476
I don't really drink.
511
00:34:39,478 --> 00:34:41,478
I'll decide where we're going.
512
00:34:43,082 --> 00:34:44,681
OK.
513
00:34:44,683 --> 00:34:47,751
- [crowd commotion]
- [somber beat music playing]
514
00:35:00,132 --> 00:35:01,364
- This is great.
- Yeah.
515
00:35:01,366 --> 00:35:02,833
[Jonas]
This was a good decision.
516
00:35:02,835 --> 00:35:05,735
Hey, could we get an
order of fries, please?
517
00:35:05,737 --> 00:35:07,337
Yes.
518
00:35:07,339 --> 00:35:10,273
And two tequilas on
the rocks, please.
519
00:35:10,275 --> 00:35:11,641
And some water.
520
00:35:11,643 --> 00:35:13,110
Thank you.
521
00:35:15,547 --> 00:35:16,746
OK, so.
522
00:35:16,748 --> 00:35:18,548
So.
523
00:35:18,550 --> 00:35:19,583
- So.
- So.
524
00:35:19,585 --> 00:35:20,550
[giggling]
525
00:35:20,552 --> 00:35:21,751
Where's home for you?
526
00:35:21,753 --> 00:35:24,621
Home? Where's home?
527
00:35:25,691 --> 00:35:28,425
- Between L.A. and Chicago.
- Oh.
528
00:35:28,427 --> 00:35:31,261
L.A. by choice and Chicago by.
529
00:35:32,264 --> 00:35:34,531
I guess, necessity.
530
00:35:34,533 --> 00:35:35,732
Hmm.
531
00:35:39,638 --> 00:35:41,204
Do you like my hair?
532
00:35:41,206 --> 00:35:43,173
- Mm-hmm.
- I don't usually have bangs
533
00:35:43,175 --> 00:35:46,610
but my hairdresser just put
them in to see if I like them.
534
00:35:46,612 --> 00:35:49,779
- Do you like them?
- Mm-hmm, I do actually.
535
00:35:49,781 --> 00:35:51,348
I think I'm gonna keep it.
536
00:35:51,350 --> 00:35:53,683
You should definitely keep it.
537
00:35:53,685 --> 00:35:54,618
Thank you.
538
00:35:54,620 --> 00:35:55,752
Thank you.
539
00:35:55,754 --> 00:35:56,887
Where's home for you?
540
00:35:56,889 --> 00:35:58,622
Oh, well,
541
00:35:58,624 --> 00:36:00,924
I grew up in Paris,
so that will always be home
542
00:36:00,926 --> 00:36:02,726
but my mom is American
543
00:36:02,728 --> 00:36:06,163
and I lived in Tribeca
for a long time now.
544
00:36:06,165 --> 00:36:08,165
So, I guess that's home.
545
00:36:08,167 --> 00:36:09,499
Huh.
546
00:36:11,803 --> 00:36:13,336
Oh, God, OK.
547
00:36:13,338 --> 00:36:14,504
[clears throat]
548
00:36:14,506 --> 00:36:15,805
Salty.
549
00:36:15,807 --> 00:36:18,575
"Salty." [speaking French]
550
00:36:20,812 --> 00:36:22,812
Ugh.
551
00:36:22,814 --> 00:36:23,947
[moaning]
552
00:36:23,949 --> 00:36:25,949
Oh, my God.
553
00:36:25,951 --> 00:36:27,651
Yes.
554
00:36:31,256 --> 00:36:33,323
Do you live with your boyfriend?
555
00:36:34,860 --> 00:36:36,660
Do you live with yours?
556
00:36:38,664 --> 00:36:40,764
[laughing]
557
00:36:40,766 --> 00:36:42,399
My kid is in Chicago.
558
00:36:42,401 --> 00:36:43,366
Oh.
559
00:36:43,368 --> 00:36:45,268
And my work's in L.A.
560
00:36:45,270 --> 00:36:46,903
Necessity. I get it.
561
00:36:46,905 --> 00:36:50,607
I got a girl pregnant and
now I got an 11 year old boy
562
00:36:50,609 --> 00:36:53,944
and a lot of... [sighs]
563
00:36:55,280 --> 00:36:58,515
- air miles.
- [chuckling]
564
00:36:58,517 --> 00:37:00,483
Well I don't live
with my boyfriend.
565
00:37:00,485 --> 00:37:01,484
No?
566
00:37:01,486 --> 00:37:02,552
Mm-hmm.
567
00:37:02,554 --> 00:37:03,987
Are you still with the mom?
568
00:37:03,989 --> 00:37:06,856
- No.
- No?
569
00:37:06,858 --> 00:37:08,325
No, she's unbalanced
570
00:37:08,327 --> 00:37:12,262
and not the fun kind either, so.
571
00:37:16,235 --> 00:37:17,734
So is your ex coming back?
572
00:37:19,871 --> 00:37:20,870
Yes.
573
00:37:20,872 --> 00:37:22,572
- Yes?
- Tomorrow.
574
00:37:24,276 --> 00:37:25,809
You gonna go see him?
575
00:37:27,412 --> 00:37:28,812
I don't know.
576
00:37:31,984 --> 00:37:33,883
Does your boyfriend
know he's coming?
577
00:37:33,885 --> 00:37:35,986
Oh, my God,
OK one more question like this
578
00:37:35,988 --> 00:37:38,421
and this will start to
feel like an interrogation.
579
00:37:38,423 --> 00:37:39,889
Fries.
580
00:37:39,891 --> 00:37:40,890
[waitress] Can I get
you guys another round?
581
00:37:40,892 --> 00:37:41,992
No, thank you.
582
00:37:43,996 --> 00:37:45,662
No, not an interrogation.
583
00:37:45,664 --> 00:37:48,365
Just think of it more
like a, I don't know,
584
00:37:49,034 --> 00:37:50,567
like an interview.
585
00:37:50,569 --> 00:37:51,635
Mmmm.
586
00:37:51,637 --> 00:37:53,336
Yeah, I'm like a journalist,
587
00:37:53,338 --> 00:37:56,473
I'm trying to get to the
bottom of this mysterious,
588
00:37:56,475 --> 00:37:59,342
gorgeous half-French,
589
00:37:59,344 --> 00:38:02,012
- half-American artist.
- [muffled beat music playing]
590
00:38:02,014 --> 00:38:04,381
- You get the idea.
- Oh, my God.
591
00:38:04,383 --> 00:38:06,850
Oh, I love this song.
I have to go dance.
592
00:38:06,852 --> 00:38:08,718
When you gotta dance,
you gotta dance.
593
00:38:08,720 --> 00:38:09,853
I gotta dance.
594
00:38:10,856 --> 00:38:13,456
♪ Heavy from lying ♪
595
00:38:13,458 --> 00:38:16,326
♪ Empty from crying ♪
596
00:38:16,328 --> 00:38:19,863
♪ Ready for flying away ♪
597
00:38:19,865 --> 00:38:25,035
♪ For flying away,
hey, hey, hey ♪
598
00:38:25,037 --> 00:38:27,937
♪ Hey, hey, hey ♪
599
00:38:27,939 --> 00:38:30,340
♪ Hey, hey ♪
600
00:38:30,342 --> 00:38:34,878
♪ I'm flying away,
yay, yay, yay ♪
601
00:38:34,880 --> 00:38:37,814
♪ Yay, yay, yay ♪
602
00:38:37,816 --> 00:38:40,884
♪ Yay, yay ♪
603
00:38:40,886 --> 00:38:42,352
♪ I'm flying ♪
604
00:38:42,354 --> 00:38:44,954
♪ Heavy from trying ♪
605
00:38:44,956 --> 00:38:47,557
♪ Empty from crying ♪
606
00:38:47,559 --> 00:38:52,662
♪ Ready for flying away ♪
607
00:38:52,664 --> 00:38:55,465
♪ I'm heavy from trying ♪
608
00:38:55,467 --> 00:38:57,934
♪ Empty from crying ♪
609
00:38:57,936 --> 00:39:01,871
♪ Ready for flying away ♪
610
00:39:01,873 --> 00:39:07,077
♪ For flying away,
hey, hey, hey ♪
611
00:39:07,079 --> 00:39:10,013
♪ Hey, hey, hey ♪
612
00:39:10,015 --> 00:39:12,482
♪ Hey, hey ♪
613
00:39:12,484 --> 00:39:14,984
♪ I'm flying away ♪
614
00:39:14,986 --> 00:39:17,754
[muffled beat music playing]
615
00:39:55,093 --> 00:39:56,926
[door creaking]
616
00:40:08,006 --> 00:40:11,641
You know what I think this
evening needs a little more of?
617
00:40:14,079 --> 00:40:15,678
Tequila.
618
00:40:15,680 --> 00:40:17,113
Oh, my God, again?
619
00:40:17,115 --> 00:40:19,182
What do you mean?
620
00:40:19,184 --> 00:40:21,551
We barely had any.
621
00:40:21,553 --> 00:40:23,853
[giggling]
622
00:40:23,855 --> 00:40:26,089
Oh, thank you.
623
00:40:26,091 --> 00:40:27,791
- Cheers.
- Cheers.
624
00:40:29,060 --> 00:40:30,693
Mmmm.
625
00:40:30,695 --> 00:40:33,997
OK, tell me, the kid
you had 11 years ago,
626
00:40:33,999 --> 00:40:35,565
that was an accident, right?
627
00:40:38,870 --> 00:40:40,470
Well, I wouldn't want
him going around thinking
628
00:40:40,472 --> 00:40:42,038
that's what
I think of him, but...
629
00:40:42,941 --> 00:40:44,574
No.
630
00:40:44,576 --> 00:40:47,877
Yeah, I didn't
exactly plan it out.
631
00:40:47,879 --> 00:40:49,512
But,
632
00:40:49,514 --> 00:40:51,614
that was your only...
633
00:40:51,616 --> 00:40:53,049
My only accident?
634
00:40:54,119 --> 00:40:56,786
- No.
- No?
635
00:40:56,788 --> 00:41:00,023
There were a couple
more in my 20's and...
636
00:41:00,025 --> 00:41:04,227
the chances are those are just
the ones that I know about.
637
00:41:07,732 --> 00:41:08,932
Huh.
638
00:41:16,107 --> 00:41:18,608
I spent all of my 20's and...
639
00:41:20,212 --> 00:41:21,878
most of my 30's...
640
00:41:23,014 --> 00:41:25,648
going down rabbit
holes of various kinds.
641
00:41:27,152 --> 00:41:31,721
And I don't know where to tell
you to look for your answers
642
00:41:31,723 --> 00:41:34,791
but I can tell you,
643
00:41:34,793 --> 00:41:37,594
you're only gonna get so far
looking on your own.
644
00:41:37,596 --> 00:41:40,763
Sometimes you can spend so
many years looking on your own
645
00:41:40,765 --> 00:41:43,967
that you lose the chance
to have it any other way.
646
00:41:46,137 --> 00:41:47,537
Wow.
647
00:41:49,908 --> 00:41:53,042
Well, I don't know if I want
to look for answers or anything.
648
00:41:55,180 --> 00:41:57,914
Just hearing you talk about
649
00:41:57,916 --> 00:42:01,017
spending years
looking for something,
650
00:42:02,153 --> 00:42:04,721
it's tiring just to listen to.
651
00:42:11,029 --> 00:42:13,296
I don't know,
maybe I'm tired of my life
652
00:42:13,298 --> 00:42:15,832
or myself, I don't know
653
00:42:15,834 --> 00:42:19,669
but I don't want to spend
my 30's looking for anything.
654
00:42:22,173 --> 00:42:24,641
[sighing]
655
00:42:29,548 --> 00:42:30,914
Hey.
656
00:42:34,953 --> 00:42:36,719
I'd rather not go home tonight,
657
00:42:36,721 --> 00:42:38,855
do you mind if I stay?
658
00:44:26,197 --> 00:44:28,765
[traffic noise]
659
00:45:24,389 --> 00:45:26,022
I mean, Jake's not bad.
660
00:45:26,024 --> 00:45:29,058
He's a nice guy, hard working.
661
00:45:29,060 --> 00:45:32,261
Got green eyes, looks like
he's got a lot of hair
662
00:45:32,263 --> 00:45:34,263
under that beanie.
663
00:45:34,265 --> 00:45:35,498
Oh.
664
00:45:35,500 --> 00:45:37,934
No cancer in his family either.
665
00:45:37,936 --> 00:45:40,870
Kind of looking good here.
666
00:45:40,872 --> 00:45:44,373
Oh, he went to
Princeton, bummer.
667
00:45:44,375 --> 00:45:45,908
Ew, Sara.
668
00:45:48,279 --> 00:45:49,212
"Ew,"
669
00:45:49,214 --> 00:45:50,813
what?
670
00:45:50,815 --> 00:45:52,215
Ew, Princeton?
671
00:45:52,217 --> 00:45:53,883
Ew, hair?
672
00:45:53,885 --> 00:45:55,451
Ew, you didn't even look.
673
00:45:57,155 --> 00:45:58,354
OK.
674
00:46:00,992 --> 00:46:03,326
OK, fine, take it back.
675
00:46:03,328 --> 00:46:05,461
- Totally hot.
- He's cute.
676
00:46:05,463 --> 00:46:06,963
Right, Mom?
677
00:46:06,965 --> 00:46:08,531
Yes. Totally hot.
678
00:46:08,533 --> 00:46:10,900
Could you please just
wait until after breakfast
679
00:46:10,902 --> 00:46:12,902
before you start breeding her?
680
00:46:12,904 --> 00:46:16,305
- [chuckling]
- Oh, "her?"
681
00:46:16,307 --> 00:46:20,343
Well, "she" has been looking
for a sperm donor for months
682
00:46:20,345 --> 00:46:22,945
and "she" is on a clock.
683
00:46:22,947 --> 00:46:25,314
Why don't you just have
a kid the normal way?
684
00:46:25,316 --> 00:46:27,116
The "normal way?"
685
00:46:27,118 --> 00:46:30,052
Oh, my Gosh, where's your
empathy gene this morning?
686
00:46:30,054 --> 00:46:32,388
Nice, Mark,
do you see a guy around?
687
00:46:33,858 --> 00:46:35,191
[footsteps thumping]
688
00:46:35,193 --> 00:46:36,526
There she is.
689
00:46:36,528 --> 00:46:38,528
Hi, monkey.
690
00:46:43,034 --> 00:46:45,134
Mommy, may I please
have some French toast?
691
00:46:45,136 --> 00:46:46,869
But of course you may.
692
00:46:49,240 --> 00:46:51,073
Robbie, baby,
693
00:46:51,075 --> 00:46:52,441
your French toast will
ready in two minutes.
694
00:46:52,443 --> 00:46:53,943
Do you want whipped cream?
695
00:46:53,945 --> 00:46:55,244
Yes, please.
696
00:46:55,246 --> 00:46:56,512
It's not like
I have a boyfriend,
697
00:46:56,514 --> 00:46:58,080
you know what I'm saying?
698
00:46:58,082 --> 00:47:00,016
I mean, I'm not even
sure at this point
699
00:47:00,018 --> 00:47:02,185
that I want a boyfriend.
What I want is a baby.
700
00:47:02,187 --> 00:47:03,853
I really wanna have a baby
701
00:47:04,556 --> 00:47:05,822
and I'm gonna do this.
702
00:47:05,824 --> 00:47:07,957
I'm gonna do this.
703
00:47:07,959 --> 00:47:10,226
I want one like you,
with those little cheekies.
704
00:47:10,228 --> 00:47:12,461
[giggling]
705
00:47:15,200 --> 00:47:17,133
Do you think Mar
is gonna want them?
706
00:47:17,135 --> 00:47:19,302
You know, like, try again?
707
00:47:20,972 --> 00:47:22,505
I don't know.
708
00:47:22,507 --> 00:47:24,173
You guys totally should.
709
00:47:24,175 --> 00:47:26,843
It'll be like the
cutest baby ever.
710
00:47:26,845 --> 00:47:29,545
You know, you should
think about Mom's plumber.
711
00:47:29,547 --> 00:47:30,880
What's his name, Mom?
712
00:47:30,882 --> 00:47:32,615
- Roberto?
- Roberto.
713
00:47:32,617 --> 00:47:34,350
He's a very good looking guy.
714
00:47:35,253 --> 00:47:36,419
Square jaw line.
715
00:47:36,421 --> 00:47:37,420
He's a very good kisser.
716
00:47:37,422 --> 00:47:39,288
I gotta say, he is hot.
717
00:47:39,290 --> 00:47:41,357
I'm not having a baby
with Roberto, guys.
718
00:47:41,359 --> 00:47:43,526
Could you imagine,
anytime I needed something,
719
00:47:43,528 --> 00:47:46,028
he'd be fixing someone's
pipes in Westchester.
720
00:47:47,265 --> 00:47:48,464
Cherry!
721
00:47:48,466 --> 00:47:49,899
Thank you, Grandma.
722
00:47:49,901 --> 00:47:51,000
Yum.
723
00:47:51,002 --> 00:47:52,201
You're welcome, darling.
724
00:47:53,037 --> 00:47:54,904
[Laura] Your lucky day.
725
00:47:54,906 --> 00:47:56,505
[Sara] Can I have some?
726
00:47:56,507 --> 00:47:57,907
[Robbie] Can I eat if first?
727
00:47:57,909 --> 00:48:00,343
[Sara laughing]
728
00:48:10,989 --> 00:48:12,588
[Laura]
Have you guys been talking?
729
00:48:17,528 --> 00:48:19,929
I've barely even seen her.
730
00:48:21,633 --> 00:48:24,200
Hmm.
731
00:48:24,202 --> 00:48:27,036
We went out to dinner
a couple of nights ago
732
00:48:27,038 --> 00:48:28,537
with some friends of mine.
733
00:48:29,674 --> 00:48:32,208
It was like she was
barely even there.
734
00:48:33,111 --> 00:48:35,311
[water trickling]
735
00:48:35,313 --> 00:48:37,680
She doesn't really
wanna talk about it.
736
00:48:39,183 --> 00:48:40,516
To be honest,
737
00:48:40,518 --> 00:48:43,286
I'm not sure that
I want to anymore either.
738
00:48:49,427 --> 00:48:51,694
[tea pot whistling]
739
00:49:03,541 --> 00:49:05,441
[water trickling]
740
00:49:07,512 --> 00:49:10,579
I know you're tired
of talking about it.
741
00:49:10,581 --> 00:49:13,249
I know how exhausting it is
742
00:49:13,251 --> 00:49:17,186
and you're always the last one
to complain about anything.
743
00:49:17,188 --> 00:49:19,422
So I don't bring it
up to pick at a wound.
744
00:49:19,424 --> 00:49:21,724
It's just important to
me to keep reminding you
745
00:49:21,726 --> 00:49:23,225
how much I care
746
00:49:23,227 --> 00:49:25,461
and how we are
always here for you.
747
00:49:27,231 --> 00:49:29,598
We always pick the
complicated ones.
748
00:49:29,600 --> 00:49:32,168
[chuckling]
749
00:49:32,170 --> 00:49:34,370
Keep things interesting though,
750
00:49:34,372 --> 00:49:36,472
I guess.
751
00:49:36,474 --> 00:49:37,974
[water draining]
752
00:49:37,976 --> 00:49:40,576
She'll come around.
753
00:49:40,578 --> 00:49:42,378
I haven't gone through
what she's gone through
754
00:49:42,380 --> 00:49:44,714
but I know her.
755
00:49:46,017 --> 00:49:47,717
I know that it'll work out.
756
00:49:52,090 --> 00:49:53,990
[phone chiming]
757
00:50:10,408 --> 00:50:12,041
[phone chiming]
758
00:50:20,118 --> 00:50:22,585
I sat alone at the hotel
bar like a cheap hooker.
759
00:50:22,587 --> 00:50:25,488
Did you not think to just
text me a few hours earlier
760
00:50:25,490 --> 00:50:27,556
just to let me know?
761
00:50:27,558 --> 00:50:29,191
[phone chiming]
762
00:51:39,831 --> 00:51:42,098
[dial tone buzzing]
763
00:51:42,100 --> 00:51:43,599
[Isabel on phone]
Hey, girl, what's up?
764
00:51:43,601 --> 00:51:45,267
Hey, can you come over?
765
00:51:45,269 --> 00:51:47,403
Yeah, totally. I'm just picking
up a few things.
766
00:51:47,405 --> 00:51:48,571
OK, cool, see you soon.
767
00:51:48,573 --> 00:51:49,872
I'll be right over.
768
00:51:57,381 --> 00:51:58,781
OK.
769
00:51:58,783 --> 00:52:01,350
[knife chopping]
770
00:52:13,431 --> 00:52:15,664
[paper rustling]
771
00:52:25,776 --> 00:52:28,177
[knocking]
772
00:52:28,179 --> 00:52:29,378
Coming!
773
00:52:37,321 --> 00:52:39,522
Oh, that was so fast.
774
00:52:39,524 --> 00:52:41,290
I know.
775
00:52:41,292 --> 00:52:43,192
I was just pulling looks at
a store a few blocks away
776
00:52:43,194 --> 00:52:44,260
from my shoot on Monday.
777
00:52:44,262 --> 00:52:45,828
You OK?
778
00:52:45,830 --> 00:52:47,830
Not really.
779
00:52:47,832 --> 00:52:49,431
[Isabel] Do you mind if I smoke?
780
00:52:49,433 --> 00:52:50,466
Yeah.
781
00:52:52,737 --> 00:52:54,303
Max is in New York.
782
00:52:54,305 --> 00:52:56,639
Whoa. When was the last
time you saw him?
783
00:52:56,641 --> 00:52:58,908
Also, when the fuck
did you get bangs?
784
00:52:58,910 --> 00:53:01,410
Oh, they did them yesterday
to see if I liked them.
785
00:53:01,412 --> 00:53:03,779
They look fantastic on you,
you have to keep them.
786
00:53:03,781 --> 00:53:06,215
You've gotta make
those permanent.
787
00:53:06,217 --> 00:53:07,783
[laughs] Sorry, sorry, Max.
788
00:53:07,785 --> 00:53:11,854
Yeah, so I found a note
in my mail from him,
789
00:53:11,856 --> 00:53:13,656
so I sent him a message
790
00:53:13,658 --> 00:53:15,758
and he asked me to meet
him for drinks at his hotel
791
00:53:15,760 --> 00:53:18,794
and I'm sitting at
the bar and he texts me
792
00:53:18,796 --> 00:53:20,796
telling me he had
to change his flight
793
00:53:20,798 --> 00:53:22,364
and is coming the next day.
794
00:53:22,366 --> 00:53:23,966
So nothing's changed.
795
00:53:23,968 --> 00:53:25,234
No.
796
00:53:25,236 --> 00:53:26,535
Are you gonna meet him?
797
00:53:26,537 --> 00:53:27,603
Mm-hmm.
798
00:53:27,605 --> 00:53:30,639
I'm meeting him for dinner.
799
00:53:30,641 --> 00:53:33,776
We haven't seen each
other in over four years.
800
00:53:33,778 --> 00:53:36,312
We stopped talking when
I started seeing Mark.
801
00:53:36,314 --> 00:53:37,680
Mmmm.
802
00:53:37,682 --> 00:53:39,848
I wonder if he still
looks the same.
803
00:53:39,850 --> 00:53:41,450
Yeah.
804
00:53:42,853 --> 00:53:43,852
Does Mark know he's in town?
805
00:53:43,854 --> 00:53:45,721
No.
806
00:53:45,723 --> 00:53:47,656
I'd have to go back
to the beginning
807
00:53:47,658 --> 00:53:50,893
and get into literally
everything about Max
808
00:53:50,895 --> 00:53:53,462
and I just don't
need that right now.
809
00:53:54,398 --> 00:53:55,864
And Mark doesn't either.
810
00:53:55,866 --> 00:53:57,900
Mark still doesn't
know about Max, right?
811
00:53:57,902 --> 00:53:59,735
No.
812
00:53:59,737 --> 00:54:02,571
So, he doesn't know that you
were ever pregnant before?
813
00:54:02,573 --> 00:54:03,872
No.
814
00:54:03,874 --> 00:54:05,574
Neither of them do.
815
00:54:10,982 --> 00:54:13,649
Is it bad that I am
a little excited?
816
00:54:13,651 --> 00:54:16,485
It's bad that you're
only a little excited.
817
00:54:16,487 --> 00:54:18,020
It's Max.
818
00:54:18,022 --> 00:54:20,990
Have you decided if you're
gonna sleep with him?
819
00:54:22,026 --> 00:54:23,525
Wait.
820
00:54:32,803 --> 00:54:34,036
Wow.
821
00:54:35,539 --> 00:54:37,406
Wow.
822
00:54:37,408 --> 00:54:39,908
He took this just after
we started dating.
823
00:54:42,480 --> 00:54:45,381
How have I never
seen this before?
824
00:54:45,383 --> 00:54:47,049
I don't know.
825
00:54:47,051 --> 00:54:49,985
I put that in a box
under my skirts.
826
00:54:49,987 --> 00:54:52,021
I haven't looked
at it in a year.
827
00:54:52,023 --> 00:54:53,922
Does he do this professionally?
828
00:54:53,924 --> 00:54:55,624
No clue, no.
829
00:54:55,626 --> 00:54:57,960
He used to do that just
for fun but who knows?
830
00:54:59,297 --> 00:55:01,463
You nervous.
831
00:55:01,465 --> 00:55:02,598
Yeah, a little.
832
00:55:03,501 --> 00:55:05,301
What if it's weird?
833
00:55:05,303 --> 00:55:07,503
No, won't be weird.
834
00:55:07,505 --> 00:55:10,339
I mean, look, he's a dick
for flaking last night
835
00:55:10,341 --> 00:55:13,442
but it definitely
won't be weird.
836
00:55:13,444 --> 00:55:14,677
You think he's married?
837
00:55:15,579 --> 00:55:17,346
I honestly don't know.
838
00:55:17,348 --> 00:55:19,882
I know he was seeing
that girl from Miami
839
00:55:19,884 --> 00:55:22,918
but maybe he works in
the gallery, I don't know.
840
00:55:25,356 --> 00:55:26,855
Well you seem better.
841
00:55:27,958 --> 00:55:29,758
More yourself.
842
00:55:29,760 --> 00:55:30,993
Almost.
843
00:55:30,995 --> 00:55:32,328
You look like you
were having fun
844
00:55:32,330 --> 00:55:34,630
with Francesca the other night.
845
00:55:35,833 --> 00:55:37,066
It's weird.
846
00:55:38,903 --> 00:55:41,970
I have moments where
I feel like myself
847
00:55:41,972 --> 00:55:46,408
but it's like my body's here
848
00:55:46,410 --> 00:55:48,344
but I'm not in it.
849
00:55:48,346 --> 00:55:50,679
I'm, I don't even know where.
850
00:55:52,116 --> 00:55:54,917
But I had fun with you
on Thursday, thank you.
851
00:55:54,919 --> 00:55:56,452
I needed that.
852
00:55:57,355 --> 00:55:58,987
I don't know.
853
00:55:58,989 --> 00:56:02,424
I was bursting to tears
on my run the other day.
854
00:56:02,426 --> 00:56:04,927
- Almost?
- Yeah.
855
00:56:04,929 --> 00:56:08,797
When was the last time
you actually cried?
856
00:56:08,799 --> 00:56:11,867
On the plane coming
back from Paris.
857
00:56:11,869 --> 00:56:14,570
Honey, you haven't
cried in four years?
858
00:56:17,108 --> 00:56:19,375
- [phone buzzing]
- Shit.
859
00:56:19,377 --> 00:56:20,709
[Marin] What?
860
00:56:20,711 --> 00:56:22,511
[chuckling]
861
00:56:22,513 --> 00:56:24,880
I forgot, I'm supposed to
water my neighbor's plants.
862
00:56:24,882 --> 00:56:26,515
[laughing]
863
00:56:26,517 --> 00:56:27,850
I wish I was kidding.
864
00:56:27,852 --> 00:56:29,551
You set an alarm?
865
00:56:29,553 --> 00:56:31,720
Who knew plants were
so high maintenance?
866
00:56:31,722 --> 00:56:33,989
[laughing]
867
00:56:35,526 --> 00:56:37,025
I love you.
868
00:56:37,027 --> 00:56:40,963
Laughter is normal
and so is crying.
869
00:56:40,965 --> 00:56:42,564
I don't understand
how you haven't cried
870
00:56:42,566 --> 00:56:44,032
in four years or whatever
871
00:56:44,034 --> 00:56:46,034
but I think this is progress.
872
00:56:46,036 --> 00:56:47,569
Yeah.
873
00:56:47,571 --> 00:56:49,138
Have fun tonight.
874
00:56:49,140 --> 00:56:52,040
Seriously, just enjoy yourself.
875
00:56:52,042 --> 00:56:53,409
He's not a stranger.
876
00:56:53,411 --> 00:56:55,677
Four years isn't that long.
877
00:56:55,679 --> 00:56:58,113
Just, um...
878
00:56:58,115 --> 00:57:01,049
don't think so much for once.
879
00:57:01,051 --> 00:57:02,151
Love you.
880
00:57:02,153 --> 00:57:04,486
[Marin] Love you.
881
00:57:11,862 --> 00:57:13,429
Uncle Mark?
882
00:57:13,431 --> 00:57:14,997
Where is Marin?
883
00:57:16,434 --> 00:57:18,901
She's in the city this weekend.
884
00:57:18,903 --> 00:57:20,169
I miss her.
885
00:57:23,474 --> 00:57:25,507
I miss her too, sweetheart.
886
00:57:25,509 --> 00:57:28,877
Hey, hon, you gonna
stay for dinner?
887
00:57:30,815 --> 00:57:34,216
You know, I think so,
just give me a sec.
888
00:57:34,218 --> 00:57:35,751
Be right back.
889
00:57:52,136 --> 00:57:54,136
[phone jingling]
890
00:58:14,525 --> 00:58:15,958
Marin, um...
891
00:58:19,129 --> 00:58:21,630
I'm always gonna
be here for you.
892
00:58:31,141 --> 00:58:33,942
[phone chiming]
893
00:58:38,182 --> 00:58:39,715
[phone jingling]
894
00:58:49,126 --> 00:58:50,192
I'm staying for dinner.
895
00:58:50,194 --> 00:58:51,760
Fabulous.
896
00:59:04,842 --> 00:59:06,942
[Marin voiceover]
I know you're a good man.
897
00:59:06,944 --> 00:59:08,677
You're kind and steady.
898
00:59:10,014 --> 00:59:11,914
I probably don't deserve you.
899
00:59:13,183 --> 00:59:16,084
But you don't really see me.
900
00:59:16,086 --> 00:59:19,087
You see the idea of the
girl you met four years ago.
901
00:59:22,326 --> 00:59:23,825
She was perfect.
902
00:59:26,230 --> 00:59:27,729
I'm not.
903
00:59:34,204 --> 00:59:38,240
Everyone thinks about starting
their life over again,
904
00:59:38,242 --> 00:59:40,175
so they can somehow control it.
905
00:59:42,212 --> 00:59:44,580
But I'm living my life now
906
00:59:44,582 --> 00:59:46,715
and there is no
way to control it,
907
00:59:48,218 --> 00:59:49,918
so I just have to let go.
908
01:00:13,177 --> 01:00:15,143
[elevator bell dings]
909
01:00:48,045 --> 01:00:50,145
[Marin] Just a glass of water.
910
01:00:54,284 --> 01:00:55,784
Thank you.
911
01:01:08,098 --> 01:01:11,033
So, we'll have two
artichokes and two steaks.
912
01:01:11,035 --> 01:01:14,002
And for her, the sauce
on the side, please.
913
01:01:14,004 --> 01:01:15,270
Thank you.
914
01:01:15,272 --> 01:01:17,172
Still ordering
for people, I see.
915
01:01:17,174 --> 01:01:18,373
Just you.
916
01:01:19,309 --> 01:01:21,343
[speaking French]
917
01:01:21,345 --> 01:01:22,678
English.
918
01:01:23,781 --> 01:01:25,180
Did you forget all
your French already?
919
01:01:25,182 --> 01:01:27,749
No, I live here now,
so I speak English.
920
01:01:33,290 --> 01:01:35,223
You look good.
921
01:01:35,225 --> 01:01:36,892
Older but good.
922
01:01:36,894 --> 01:01:39,061
You too.
You look good.
923
01:01:40,030 --> 01:01:43,465
Not older, but more astute.
924
01:01:46,336 --> 01:01:47,803
You look the same.
925
01:01:51,842 --> 01:01:53,408
I don't know.
926
01:01:53,410 --> 01:01:55,777
I don't even know
what to say to you.
927
01:01:55,779 --> 01:01:57,946
You look like you're
going to interview me.
928
01:01:57,948 --> 01:01:59,081
Just relax.
929
01:02:02,386 --> 01:02:03,485
Are you married?
930
01:02:05,355 --> 01:02:06,421
No.
931
01:02:07,391 --> 01:02:08,724
Are you?
932
01:02:08,726 --> 01:02:10,358
No.
933
01:02:10,360 --> 01:02:11,893
Are you still with...
934
01:02:11,895 --> 01:02:13,795
- Mark?
- Yes, Mark.
935
01:02:13,797 --> 01:02:16,064
- Yeah.
- Yeah?
936
01:02:17,000 --> 01:02:18,934
So you think you'll marry him?
937
01:02:21,305 --> 01:02:22,471
I don't know.
938
01:02:25,275 --> 01:02:28,310
Why did you send me a copy
of that thing about Julian?
939
01:02:29,179 --> 01:02:30,812
I don't know.
940
01:02:30,814 --> 01:02:32,881
It didn't feel right
sending you a message.
941
01:02:32,883 --> 01:02:34,382
You could've emailed.
942
01:02:34,384 --> 01:02:35,951
I don't like emails.
943
01:02:37,421 --> 01:02:38,520
It surprised me.
944
01:02:41,492 --> 01:02:43,859
And what are you
doing in New York?
945
01:02:45,329 --> 01:02:48,396
I'm here to see you,
946
01:02:48,398 --> 01:02:49,531
including Iesha as well.
947
01:02:49,533 --> 01:02:51,867
Your sister lives in New York?
948
01:02:51,869 --> 01:02:54,402
She's doing a teaching
program at Columbia.
949
01:02:54,404 --> 01:02:55,904
Wow.
950
01:02:56,774 --> 01:02:58,073
So tell me about you.
951
01:02:58,075 --> 01:02:59,407
What's been going on?
952
01:02:59,409 --> 01:03:00,876
How's Mark?
953
01:03:02,212 --> 01:03:05,413
Mark's good.
He's in Connecticut.
954
01:03:05,415 --> 01:03:07,182
Does he know you're with me?
955
01:03:07,184 --> 01:03:09,084
No.
956
01:03:09,086 --> 01:03:10,952
He doesn't know about you.
957
01:03:12,055 --> 01:03:14,823
I don't want,
I don't need him...
958
01:03:15,459 --> 01:03:16,992
He doesn't need to know.
959
01:03:19,129 --> 01:03:21,263
Hey, do you remember
my friend, Isabel?
960
01:03:21,265 --> 01:03:22,531
Mm-hmm.
961
01:03:22,533 --> 01:03:24,366
So you'll laugh,
I was in my closet today
962
01:03:24,368 --> 01:03:27,269
and I was looking at
that picture you took of me,
963
01:03:27,271 --> 01:03:30,939
you know, when we were living
in that shitty apartment.
964
01:03:30,941 --> 01:03:33,408
Anyway, I haven't
looked at it in years
965
01:03:33,410 --> 01:03:36,077
and I showed it to her.
966
01:03:36,079 --> 01:03:37,479
I remember that photo.
967
01:03:37,481 --> 01:03:39,948
It's my favorite of you.
968
01:03:39,950 --> 01:03:41,449
Do you still take pictures?
969
01:03:41,451 --> 01:03:42,984
I am.
970
01:03:42,986 --> 01:03:45,353
I had a show
a few months ago in L.A.
971
01:03:45,355 --> 01:03:47,355
At Kate's gallery.
972
01:03:47,357 --> 01:03:49,090
Oh.
973
01:03:49,092 --> 01:03:50,525
You seem surprised.
974
01:03:51,428 --> 01:03:53,161
You always told me
975
01:03:53,163 --> 01:03:54,563
that if you had to take
pictures for your work
976
01:03:54,565 --> 01:03:56,531
it would take out
all the joy for you.
977
01:03:57,568 --> 01:03:59,067
Things change.
978
01:04:00,204 --> 01:04:02,070
And do you still take portraits?
979
01:04:04,508 --> 01:04:07,375
Do you photograph Kate?
980
01:04:07,377 --> 01:04:09,911
Sometimes.
She doesn't really like it.
981
01:04:12,216 --> 01:04:13,582
[chuckling]
982
01:04:15,853 --> 01:04:18,520
I'm kind of shocked
you're still with her.
983
01:04:18,522 --> 01:04:21,056
Why is that?
You're still with Mark.
984
01:04:21,058 --> 01:04:24,893
Yes, but I enjoy being in
a relationship and you don't.
985
01:04:25,929 --> 01:04:27,395
At least you didn't used to.
986
01:04:27,397 --> 01:04:30,432
I was in a
relationship with you.
987
01:04:30,434 --> 01:04:33,068
I asked you to marry me,
if you remember.
988
01:04:39,243 --> 01:04:41,176
She's... She's easy.
989
01:04:42,346 --> 01:04:44,512
She's not complicated.
990
01:04:44,514 --> 01:04:46,281
Am I complicated?
991
01:04:46,283 --> 01:04:47,549
Yes.
992
01:04:47,551 --> 01:04:49,117
Well, [chuckles]
993
01:04:49,119 --> 01:04:51,119
I don't know,
it's been a long time.
994
01:04:53,023 --> 01:04:55,523
You were complicated, very.
995
01:04:55,525 --> 01:04:58,159
That's what drew me to you.
996
01:04:58,161 --> 01:05:00,595
I never knew what
I was getting with you.
997
01:05:00,597 --> 01:05:02,530
So, "easy" was what you needed?
998
01:05:02,532 --> 01:05:03,632
No.
999
01:05:03,634 --> 01:05:06,001
Yes, you wanted someone easy.
1000
01:05:06,003 --> 01:05:08,637
Someone who didn't ask
you questions or push you.
1001
01:05:08,639 --> 01:05:11,339
You wanted someone who would
let you glide through life
1002
01:05:11,341 --> 01:05:12,941
without a care in the world.
1003
01:05:12,943 --> 01:05:14,376
You're the one who left.
1004
01:05:14,378 --> 01:05:16,478
I asked you to marry me
and you packed your bags
1005
01:05:16,480 --> 01:05:17,512
and left the next day.
1006
01:05:17,514 --> 01:05:19,514
But I couldn't marry you
1007
01:05:19,516 --> 01:05:21,349
because you didn't know what
you wanted to do with your life
1008
01:05:21,351 --> 01:05:23,385
because you didn't know
who you wanted to be.
1009
01:05:23,387 --> 01:05:24,519
Does Mark?
1010
01:05:24,521 --> 01:05:25,654
Yes.
1011
01:05:29,192 --> 01:05:30,959
You don't look very happy.
1012
01:05:31,695 --> 01:05:33,662
You don't get to say that to me.
1013
01:05:33,664 --> 01:05:35,497
Yes I do, you look sad.
1014
01:05:35,499 --> 01:05:36,932
I'm not.
1015
01:05:39,102 --> 01:05:41,069
You shouldn't
have sent the article.
1016
01:05:41,071 --> 01:05:43,004
Well you shouldn't have come.
1017
01:05:44,341 --> 01:05:46,508
I sent you the letter
because I had to.
1018
01:05:46,510 --> 01:05:49,110
I didn't have a choice.
1019
01:05:49,112 --> 01:05:50,345
I needed to see you.
1020
01:05:51,481 --> 01:05:52,981
You could have
just thrown it away
1021
01:05:52,983 --> 01:05:55,250
or maybe you should have.
1022
01:05:55,252 --> 01:05:58,153
But you didn't need to come
here and make me feel this way,
1023
01:05:58,155 --> 01:06:00,355
tell me what
I can and cannot say to you.
1024
01:06:07,097 --> 01:06:08,563
[exhales]
1025
01:06:10,434 --> 01:06:11,466
I lied.
1026
01:06:11,468 --> 01:06:13,034
You have changed.
1027
01:06:14,571 --> 01:06:16,504
You're getting even
more beautiful.
1028
01:06:19,176 --> 01:06:21,076
How's your family?
1029
01:06:21,078 --> 01:06:22,711
How's work?
1030
01:06:25,148 --> 01:06:26,581
Work's been better.
1031
01:06:27,417 --> 01:06:29,250
Mom's a pain, as usual.
1032
01:06:29,252 --> 01:06:31,519
She and Dad just bought
a house in Ramatuelle
1033
01:06:31,521 --> 01:06:33,388
so she's there a lot.
1034
01:06:33,390 --> 01:06:36,057
Julian, as you saw,
is doing well.
1035
01:06:36,059 --> 01:06:38,593
I see him every couple
of weeks for dinner.
1036
01:06:40,297 --> 01:06:41,296
And you?
1037
01:06:41,298 --> 01:06:42,664
How is your parents?
1038
01:06:42,666 --> 01:06:44,599
I miss your dad.
1039
01:06:44,601 --> 01:06:46,601
He misses you too, believe me.
1040
01:06:48,772 --> 01:06:50,472
Mom was in L.A. last week.
1041
01:06:50,474 --> 01:06:52,173
She's great.
1042
01:06:53,744 --> 01:06:55,577
They're exactly the same.
1043
01:06:56,646 --> 01:06:59,547
And do you think
Kate is the one?
1044
01:06:59,549 --> 01:07:01,216
I don't know.
1045
01:07:01,218 --> 01:07:03,018
We're engaged anyway.
1046
01:07:11,661 --> 01:07:14,362
We had a baby six months ago.
1047
01:07:17,401 --> 01:07:19,251
What?
1048
01:07:19,252 --> 01:07:21,102
I don't understand,
what are you doing here?
1049
01:07:21,104 --> 01:07:23,471
I mean, what are you doing
here in New York with me?
1050
01:07:23,473 --> 01:07:25,106
I'm here to see you.
1051
01:07:25,108 --> 01:07:26,808
But we haven't spoken
in over three years
1052
01:07:26,810 --> 01:07:28,376
and you're engaged?
1053
01:07:28,378 --> 01:07:30,178
You have a fucking baby?
1054
01:07:32,682 --> 01:07:34,649
This is unbelievable.
1055
01:07:37,187 --> 01:07:39,087
I don't even know
why I am surprised.
1056
01:07:39,089 --> 01:07:41,189
That's so you.
1057
01:07:41,191 --> 01:07:43,058
What is that supposed to mean?
1058
01:07:43,060 --> 01:07:44,459
I had a miscarriage.
1059
01:07:44,461 --> 01:07:46,227
My life is completely
turned upside down
1060
01:07:46,229 --> 01:07:48,463
and you come back into
my life and you have a baby.
1061
01:07:50,333 --> 01:07:52,434
I'm gonna smoke,
don't follow me.
1062
01:08:00,777 --> 01:08:02,610
[crickets chirping]
1063
01:08:18,762 --> 01:08:21,162
[distant police siren]
1064
01:08:37,781 --> 01:08:39,881
When did you have a miscarriage?
1065
01:08:39,883 --> 01:08:42,217
A few months ago.
1066
01:08:44,321 --> 01:08:46,454
I can't believe you have a baby.
1067
01:08:47,757 --> 01:08:50,425
Is it a boy or a girl?
1068
01:08:50,427 --> 01:08:51,693
Girl.
1069
01:08:52,562 --> 01:08:53,795
Her name is Vanessa.
1070
01:08:53,797 --> 01:08:56,664
[chuckling]
1071
01:08:56,666 --> 01:08:58,533
Are you OK now?
1072
01:08:58,535 --> 01:08:59,801
Yeah.
1073
01:09:00,770 --> 01:09:02,637
I didn't want a baby anyway.
1074
01:09:09,479 --> 01:09:10,719
I came here because I miss you.
1075
01:09:14,918 --> 01:09:16,551
I think about you.
1076
01:09:18,255 --> 01:09:20,455
Not always,
but I think about you.
1077
01:09:21,291 --> 01:09:22,824
I worry about you.
1078
01:09:24,394 --> 01:09:25,693
I wonder how you are.
1079
01:09:28,365 --> 01:09:30,598
I had a baby and it made
me want to be with you.
1080
01:09:32,536 --> 01:09:34,769
So, when I saw your
brother's piece
1081
01:09:34,771 --> 01:09:38,907
I thought it was a sign
that I needed to see you.
1082
01:09:41,811 --> 01:09:43,845
It's funny,
1083
01:09:43,847 --> 01:09:46,614
I always thought we'd
have babies together.
1084
01:09:47,684 --> 01:09:50,418
Not be together but,
I don't know,
1085
01:09:50,420 --> 01:09:52,020
I thought we'd
make good parents.
1086
01:10:01,731 --> 01:10:03,831
I went out with
someone last night.
1087
01:10:06,836 --> 01:10:08,403
When you stood me up,
1088
01:10:08,405 --> 01:10:10,672
this guy at the bar,
1089
01:10:10,674 --> 01:10:14,509
we went out and I came
back with him at the hotel.
1090
01:10:14,511 --> 01:10:16,778
It was nice spending
the night with someone
1091
01:10:16,780 --> 01:10:19,681
who didn't look at you like
a sad girl who lost a baby.
1092
01:10:35,232 --> 01:10:37,498
- You're jealous.
- Of course I am.
1093
01:10:43,340 --> 01:10:44,872
Does Kate know you're with me?
1094
01:10:45,709 --> 01:10:46,975
No.
1095
01:10:48,878 --> 01:10:50,245
She doesn't know.
1096
01:11:11,401 --> 01:11:12,800
I'm happy you're here.
1097
01:11:36,026 --> 01:11:37,925
[giggling]
1098
01:12:00,917 --> 01:12:03,017
Do you still drink tequila?
1099
01:12:03,019 --> 01:12:04,919
Yes I do.
1100
01:12:04,921 --> 01:12:06,554
Good.
1101
01:12:09,826 --> 01:12:11,359
That's beautiful.
1102
01:12:14,597 --> 01:12:16,431
It's very you, this place.
1103
01:12:16,433 --> 01:12:17,498
[Marin] Mm-hmm.
1104
01:12:17,500 --> 01:12:19,467
How long have you been here?
1105
01:12:21,037 --> 01:12:22,670
A year and a half.
1106
01:12:23,606 --> 01:12:24,972
I love how quiet it is.
1107
01:12:24,974 --> 01:12:26,808
My old apartment had a view
1108
01:12:26,810 --> 01:12:28,810
but it was so noisy,
I didn't like it.
1109
01:12:29,913 --> 01:12:31,646
Why don't you quit?
1110
01:12:31,648 --> 01:12:33,715
I did.
1111
01:12:33,717 --> 01:12:34,749
I cut down.
1112
01:12:39,756 --> 01:12:41,022
Thank you.
1113
01:12:54,404 --> 01:12:56,003
Are you happy?
1114
01:12:58,074 --> 01:12:59,941
Sometimes.
1115
01:12:59,943 --> 01:13:02,009
Sometimes is good enough,
I guess.
1116
01:13:02,011 --> 01:13:03,745
It has to be.
1117
01:13:06,015 --> 01:13:08,049
How is Kate?
1118
01:13:08,051 --> 01:13:09,851
Blonde.
1119
01:13:09,853 --> 01:13:12,587
Yeah, I know,
I don't usually like blonde.
1120
01:13:14,858 --> 01:13:17,625
But she's smart.
She's beautiful.
1121
01:13:17,627 --> 01:13:19,961
Do your parents still
have the house in Corsica?
1122
01:13:22,031 --> 01:13:23,664
Yes, they do.
1123
01:13:23,666 --> 01:13:24,966
[gasping]
1124
01:13:24,968 --> 01:13:26,834
I miss that pool.
1125
01:13:26,836 --> 01:13:29,704
You remember, it was so dark
you could be naked in there
1126
01:13:29,706 --> 01:13:30,938
and nobody could tell.
1127
01:13:40,049 --> 01:13:41,616
How did you meet Mark?
1128
01:13:42,552 --> 01:13:44,051
A friend of mine,
1129
01:13:44,053 --> 01:13:46,554
she invited me to this
party she was going to
1130
01:13:46,556 --> 01:13:50,758
and I was standing at the
window smoking a cigarette
1131
01:13:50,760 --> 01:13:54,095
and he came to me and he was...
1132
01:13:56,800 --> 01:13:58,800
He was what?
1133
01:13:58,802 --> 01:14:00,701
Nice...
1134
01:14:00,703 --> 01:14:02,203
and not pretentious.
1135
01:14:07,911 --> 01:14:10,211
Did you shut him out
like you did with me?
1136
01:14:11,948 --> 01:14:13,614
He'd probably say yes.
1137
01:14:17,086 --> 01:14:18,920
Did he want a baby?
1138
01:14:29,532 --> 01:14:31,732
I'm guessing you're not
really talking to him.
1139
01:14:33,570 --> 01:14:34,836
I'm not ready.
1140
01:14:37,507 --> 01:14:39,640
Well, that's your problem.
1141
01:14:41,144 --> 01:14:43,211
What is?
1142
01:14:43,213 --> 01:14:44,946
You never wanna talk.
1143
01:14:44,948 --> 01:14:47,882
You would rather keep
everything inside but
1144
01:14:49,018 --> 01:14:50,952
that's no way to live.
1145
01:14:50,954 --> 01:14:53,120
You sound like my therapist.
1146
01:14:53,122 --> 01:14:54,622
He's right.
1147
01:14:54,624 --> 01:14:55,890
You can't say that to me.
1148
01:14:55,892 --> 01:14:57,058
What, the truth?
1149
01:14:58,661 --> 01:15:00,094
You don't know me anymore.
1150
01:15:00,096 --> 01:15:01,963
[scoffs]
Stop the bullshit, please.
1151
01:15:01,965 --> 01:15:05,066
You were the love of
my life, I know you.
1152
01:15:05,068 --> 01:15:06,968
I know you always
shut people out.
1153
01:15:06,970 --> 01:15:09,670
You used to do it to
me and it killed me.
1154
01:15:09,672 --> 01:15:11,739
I can see you're
in a lot of pain,
1155
01:15:11,741 --> 01:15:13,541
so why not talk to him about it?
1156
01:15:14,811 --> 01:15:16,878
It's because I'm angry.
1157
01:15:21,784 --> 01:15:23,084
I'm so angry.
1158
01:15:24,287 --> 01:15:26,754
I didn't want to be
pregnant, he did,
1159
01:15:26,756 --> 01:15:29,056
but now I'm the one left
picking up the pieces.
1160
01:15:39,002 --> 01:15:40,868
Anyway, let's not talk about it.
1161
01:15:43,540 --> 01:15:46,274
["Breath Control"
by John Forté playing]
1162
01:15:46,276 --> 01:15:50,044
♪ And the subtle sensation
of the pulsation ♪
1163
01:15:50,046 --> 01:15:51,212
Ugh.
1164
01:15:51,214 --> 01:15:54,916
♪ Of life inside your body ♪
1165
01:16:06,029 --> 01:16:08,262
[giggling]
1166
01:16:08,264 --> 01:16:09,797
♪ Of life inside your body ♪
1167
01:16:09,799 --> 01:16:11,566
♪ Respectable appeal, right ♪
1168
01:16:11,568 --> 01:16:13,301
♪ This is something you
should feel, right ♪
1169
01:16:13,303 --> 01:16:14,802
♪ Like a killer in the B ♪
1170
01:16:14,804 --> 01:16:16,103
♪ Close your eyes and remember ♪
1171
01:16:16,105 --> 01:16:17,972
♪ The way things are order ♪
1172
01:16:17,974 --> 01:16:20,041
♪ You remember me and
those killers from the B ♪
1173
01:16:20,043 --> 01:16:22,777
♪ Study life in plain sight,
my plane's late ♪
1174
01:16:22,779 --> 01:16:25,746
♪ Living life, you looked
like you gained weight ♪
1175
01:16:25,748 --> 01:16:28,015
♪ Here and now with
the same date ♪
1176
01:16:28,017 --> 01:16:30,751
♪ Too fast, just bring
down the frame rate ♪
1177
01:16:34,857 --> 01:16:37,358
♪ Rest your lawless
your breath control ♪
1178
01:16:37,360 --> 01:16:38,926
♪ Far from innocent ♪
1179
01:16:38,928 --> 01:16:40,661
♪ In a sense,
it left your soul ♪
1180
01:16:40,663 --> 01:16:42,597
♪ Rest your lawless
your breath control ♪
1181
01:16:42,599 --> 01:16:43,998
♪ Far from innocent ♪
1182
01:16:44,000 --> 01:16:45,866
♪ In a sense,
it left your soul ♪
1183
01:16:45,868 --> 01:16:47,802
♪ Rest your lawless
your breath control ♪
1184
01:16:47,804 --> 01:16:49,203
♪ Far from innocent ♪
1185
01:16:49,205 --> 01:16:51,038
♪ In a sense,
it left your soul ♪
1186
01:16:51,040 --> 01:16:53,307
♪ And if you're ever
tired of your breath ♪
1187
01:16:59,282 --> 01:17:02,683
♪ And do you feel
your beating heart? ♪
1188
01:17:09,659 --> 01:17:11,792
[dramatic string music playing]
1189
01:18:22,298 --> 01:18:23,464
Lights.
1190
01:18:27,170 --> 01:18:28,469
I want them off.
1191
01:20:13,376 --> 01:20:15,910
[huffing]
1192
01:20:56,953 --> 01:21:00,354
[engine rumbling]
1193
01:21:37,026 --> 01:21:38,525
[Mark voicemail] Marin,
1194
01:21:41,030 --> 01:21:43,163
I'm always gonna
be here for you.
1195
01:21:44,533 --> 01:21:46,634
Whenever you're ready,
1196
01:21:46,636 --> 01:21:49,169
I don't care if it takes years.
1197
01:21:50,006 --> 01:21:51,672
I can promise you that.
1198
01:21:54,110 --> 01:21:57,945
But what I can't promise you is
1199
01:21:57,947 --> 01:22:00,381
the way I'm gonna
be here for you.
1200
01:22:02,184 --> 01:22:04,551
I really hope that
1201
01:22:05,955 --> 01:22:08,222
it's as your boyfriend,
1202
01:22:09,492 --> 01:22:11,525
your husband, partner,
1203
01:22:11,527 --> 01:22:13,294
whatever you wanna call us.
1204
01:22:16,132 --> 01:22:18,499
But one way or another,
life has to find a way
1205
01:22:18,501 --> 01:22:21,468
to propel itself forward
and I can't,
1206
01:22:22,705 --> 01:22:25,239
I can't be in
a relationship by myself.
1207
01:22:27,476 --> 01:22:32,646
So know that I am
waiting for the call,
1208
01:22:32,648 --> 01:22:37,651
a call to do whatever it
is that you need me to do
1209
01:22:37,653 --> 01:22:39,119
to help me through this.
1210
01:22:40,723 --> 01:22:43,557
But the day might come
when I am helping you
1211
01:22:43,559 --> 01:22:46,994
just as an old friend
and that's all.
1212
01:22:49,565 --> 01:22:51,432
And it won't be out of spite.
1213
01:23:02,511 --> 01:23:06,413
It'll be because I can only
tread water for so long
1214
01:23:06,415 --> 01:23:08,282
before my legs give out.
1215
01:23:10,086 --> 01:23:11,719
[phone chiming]
1216
01:24:06,809 --> 01:24:09,109
[speaking French]
1217
01:25:36,632 --> 01:25:38,365
Have a good day.
1218
01:25:56,819 --> 01:26:00,287
[Marin voiceover]
Who says endings have to be sad?
1219
01:26:00,289 --> 01:26:01,822
That goodbyes have to be sad?
1220
01:26:03,192 --> 01:26:04,658
I don't agree.
1221
01:26:05,494 --> 01:26:07,561
It's painful at first
1222
01:26:07,563 --> 01:26:09,796
when a part of
yourself is torn away
1223
01:26:11,400 --> 01:26:14,535
but endings are the
borders that constrain you
1224
01:26:14,537 --> 01:26:17,504
from going forward in your life.
1225
01:26:17,506 --> 01:26:20,541
One needs to break free
of those constraints
1226
01:26:20,543 --> 01:26:22,509
in order to move forward.
1227
01:26:55,578 --> 01:26:57,277
[water trickling]
1228
01:27:16,966 --> 01:27:18,565
[phone chiming]
1229
01:27:35,417 --> 01:27:36,783
Have you ever had a moment
1230
01:27:36,785 --> 01:27:39,586
when your conception
of yourself slips?
1231
01:27:39,588 --> 01:27:43,423
And you realize that the stories
you've been telling yourself...
1232
01:27:43,425 --> 01:27:44,858
about yourself,
1233
01:27:44,860 --> 01:27:46,727
for however long,
1234
01:27:46,729 --> 01:27:48,528
aren't necessarily true.
1235
01:27:50,432 --> 01:27:51,798
Sometimes you're alone,
1236
01:27:51,800 --> 01:27:54,568
staring out a window
at the sidewalk
1237
01:27:54,570 --> 01:27:56,837
and it all hits you.
1238
01:27:56,839 --> 01:27:59,673
You've become
something different.
1239
01:28:06,015 --> 01:28:09,916
We can't have beginnings
without endings after all.
1240
01:28:48,424 --> 01:28:50,357
Um...
1241
01:28:50,359 --> 01:28:53,093
I don't remember what
I wanted to tell you.
1242
01:29:00,336 --> 01:29:02,569
I didn't really know...
1243
01:29:08,610 --> 01:29:11,411
I don't know, I feel like I,
1244
01:29:13,082 --> 01:29:16,083
I think I felt sad, actually,
1245
01:29:16,085 --> 01:29:18,919
because this thing
happened to us
1246
01:29:18,921 --> 01:29:22,989
and I didn't feel like you
were there for me or anything
1247
01:29:22,991 --> 01:29:24,891
and you were here,
1248
01:29:24,893 --> 01:29:28,628
like you wanted to
pretend nothing happened
1249
01:29:28,630 --> 01:29:29,996
and that we would be OK
1250
01:29:29,998 --> 01:29:34,701
and that we had to
get back to our life
1251
01:29:34,703 --> 01:29:37,971
but that's not fair because
that's not what happened and,
1252
01:29:40,109 --> 01:29:42,709
and I'm sad.
[crying]
1253
01:29:44,680 --> 01:29:46,146
And...
1254
01:29:47,716 --> 01:29:49,916
And I'm...
1255
01:29:49,918 --> 01:29:52,486
I feel bad because I feel
like maybe it's my fault
1256
01:29:52,488 --> 01:29:55,689
because I wasn't ready
to be a mom and...
1257
01:30:01,130 --> 01:30:02,596
But I'm happy you're here
1258
01:30:02,598 --> 01:30:04,498
and we can
1259
01:30:04,500 --> 01:30:06,800
get to talk to each other.
1260
01:30:09,605 --> 01:30:13,073
♪ I play into deception ♪
1261
01:30:13,075 --> 01:30:16,810
♪ Convincing you I'm strong ♪
1262
01:30:16,812 --> 01:30:20,714
♪ Your world is
in my hands now ♪
1263
01:30:20,716 --> 01:30:24,451
♪ With grace, I take you on ♪
1264
01:30:24,453 --> 01:30:27,788
♪ Agreeing not to falter ♪
1265
01:30:27,790 --> 01:30:31,458
♪ Jailer in my own prison ♪
1266
01:30:31,460 --> 01:30:35,195
♪ Have I risen, have I risen ♪
1267
01:30:35,197 --> 01:30:38,064
♪ Right out of my mind ♪
1268
01:30:38,066 --> 01:30:43,470
♪ Eyes wide open,
eyes wide open ♪
1269
01:30:45,507 --> 01:30:49,509
♪ Still, I'm blind ♪
1270
01:30:54,149 --> 01:30:59,986
♪ I'm under the light
but I can't see myself ♪
1271
01:31:01,723 --> 01:31:07,494
♪ I'm fighting to breathe
but I can't be myself ♪
1272
01:31:07,496 --> 01:31:09,830
♪ Oh, oh, oh, oh Lord ♪
1273
01:31:09,832 --> 01:31:15,535
♪ These are the strangest
days and times ♪
1274
01:31:18,740 --> 01:31:21,508
♪ Oh, oh, oh, oh Lord ♪
1275
01:31:21,510 --> 01:31:25,245
♪ If life is one big road ♪
1276
01:31:25,247 --> 01:31:30,484
♪ Where are those signs ♪
1277
01:31:33,989 --> 01:31:38,058
♪ Can't stand the
taste of tears now ♪
1278
01:31:38,060 --> 01:31:41,561
♪ Afraid of drunken grief ♪
1279
01:31:41,563 --> 01:31:44,865
♪ If I begin to let it in ♪
1280
01:31:44,867 --> 01:31:48,935
♪ Will my restless
spirit cease? ♪
1281
01:31:48,937 --> 01:31:52,706
♪ This path may be a danger ♪
1282
01:31:52,708 --> 01:31:55,742
♪ Like a stranger is company ♪
1283
01:31:55,744 --> 01:32:00,213
♪ I'm a captive
to your every whim ♪
1284
01:32:00,215 --> 01:32:02,916
♪ In search of something free ♪
1285
01:32:02,918 --> 01:32:08,622
♪ Eyes wide open,
eyes wide open ♪
1286
01:32:10,526 --> 01:32:13,026
♪ I can't see ♪
1287
01:32:19,668 --> 01:32:25,138
♪ I'm under the light
but I can't see myself ♪
1288
01:32:26,708 --> 01:32:32,279
♪ I'm fighting to breathe
but I can't be myself ♪
1289
01:32:32,281 --> 01:32:34,714
♪ Oh, oh, oh, oh Lord ♪
1290
01:32:34,716 --> 01:32:40,220
♪ These are the strangest
days and times ♪
1291
01:32:43,592 --> 01:32:46,126
♪ Oh, oh, oh, oh Lord ♪
1292
01:32:46,128 --> 01:32:50,263
♪ If life is one big road ♪
1293
01:32:50,265 --> 01:32:55,635
♪ Where are those signs? ♪
81934
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