All language subtitles for Episode 6003

To understand humanity is
to understand the sweet, lovely,

wonderful foolishness
of the human condition.

The best comedy comes
from your living experience.

Every comic sees the world through a prism

that the average person doesn't see through.

All we do is point out the obvious, really,

and then twist it somewhere.

I just can't believe the way people are.

What is it with humanity?

What kind of a world do we live in?

You're not alone, ultimately.

I think that's what the comic's saying.

Reality is the fodder for comedy
because it's what we have.

So where else can we find comedy
if not in real life?

As opposed to what, fake life?

You know.

Life is real.
Yeah, we got that.

First, a philosophical question.

Have you ever noticed when you're driving

that anyone who's driving
slower than you is an idiot?

And anyone driving faster
than you is a maniac!

You see a million things
a day in your life,

and they all go on the back burner

of your six-burner Wolf,
ridiculously priced mind.

A comedian comes out and brings
it to the front burner.

I don't like other people's showers.

There's always a problem
with temperature adjustment.

There's always a little hair
stuck on the wall.

And you want to get rid of it,
but you don't want to touch it.

I don't know how it got up
that high in the first place.

Real life is funny
because it's relatable, period.

That's it.

And if people are at home
watching something relatable,

that will make them laugh because they go,

"Oh, that happened to me, too."

Remember when you were a kid
and you'd go on vacation?

You'd be, like, "Why is dad
always in a bad mood?"

Now I understand.

Don't!
No!

Hyah!

Is this Grandma?

Yeah, she's still alive.

Why is the family
a good place to look for humor?

Was that it?

Where else --
Where else is it?

Maybe you should ask Santa for a new family.

I don't want a new family.
I don't want anyfamily.

Families suck.

Do you ever notice
where you trip on something,

when you're walking,
and you go, "What was that?"

Well, that was your family.

Would you forget the paper?

They put their foot out.

Just don't get so ahead of yourself.

Anybody got them mothers
that would hit you with a shoe?

I had a mother that would
throw a shoe at you

at the drop of a dime

and fuck you up wherever she was aiming.

I don't want to give you
the wrong impression of my dad.

He never hit us.

He carried a gun.

He never shot us.
He just --

When I started, I just did fat jokes.

I didn't know other families had that

insanity that I grew up with.

"Oh, yeah, Mom told me to tell you today.

You're adopted."

"You're ruining this whole family."

That's why we laugh.

That's why the family sitcom
has always prevailed.

Oh, I could just crawl into a hole and die!

That's the second hole
she's crawled into in two days.

In the '50s, you get
these sitcoms that, frankly,

aren't really trying to be that funny.

Boy, nobody can make pancakes like Mom.

Nobody can eat 'em like Pop.

These shows are presented
by soap sellers, car sellers.

They wanted their product
to be nice, with no sharp edges,

so they couldn't be that daring.

Very sort of white-bread
portrayals of family

were what the public wanted
to see at that time,

but in the '70s, all of that changed.

The comedy grew out of transgression.

Shows like "All in the Family"

showed a different side
of that nuclear family.

Do you realize how many boring things

I gotta do in a single day
that drive me crazy?

I gotta get up.
I gotta brush my teeth.

I have to shave, and I hate to shave.

There are mornings when I stand there,

debating with that mirror,

should I shave, or should I cut my throat?

But I shave.

You know, it's too bad
you always lose that argument.

What was it about "All in the Family"

that was so different from the things

that had come before?

I wasn't aware at the time
there was anything different.

I was writing out of my own experience.

I grew up with a father
much like Archie Bunker

who insisted that I was

the laziest white kid he ever met.

You are a meathead.

What did you call me?

A meathead --
dead from the neck up.

Meat.
Head.

Norman Lear blows the lid off
what a family sitcom is.

Oh, Archie!

Out of the way, Edith.

We were writing about what we knew,

what was happening our families --

up the street, down the street,

across the street from each other,

and that's how we got to the real problems.

I think it's time we had
a brother-to-brother talk.

Or to put it delicately,

a talk about the birds and the bees.

Well, I have to study right now.

I'll teach you about sex
some other time, okay?

Norman Lear gave you "All in the Family."

He gave you "Good Times."
He gave you "The Jeffersons."

He gave you different looks of what real,

niched versions of the American family

were in different segments of this country.

Well, he married into one
of them mixed-up families.

What do you mean, mixed-up?

Zebra city.

He's white.
She's black.

The kids are medium-rare.

It was basically all flawed characters,

but that was what was good about it.

People could relate to the fact

that these were not perfect
human beings, far from it.

You could draw a line right there.

That's where it started to change,

and that paved the way
for everything that came after.

I'm going to get married when I'm 23.

23.

And I'll have a husband named Bud.

Husband named Bud?

Bud what?

Bud Huxtable.

"The Cosby Show," in the '80s,
normalizes the black experience

in a way that was super important.

That felt more like my family

than when I heard what the myth
of the black family was.

How do you expect to get into
college with grades like this?

No problem.
Huh?

See, I'm not going to college.

Damn right.

We had "Cosby Show," "Family Ties."

We had the Seavers.

And those families were saying
we're all basically the same.

It was a more conservative era,

and so you had these
upper-middle-class households

who don't worry about money,

are able to, like, balance
their careers and their kids,

and then in comes "Roseanne."

I'm sorry.

What do you want me to do,
throw myself off a bridge?

Yeah, and take your brother
and sister with you.

Are you ever sorry we got married?

Every second of my life.

We're used to a certain amount
of slickness in our sitcoms,

but "Roseanne" got rid of all of that,

mostly because she was
never that kind of performer.

This was not "The Cosby Show."

They were letting it all hang
out and letting it be funny.

You're being totally unfair

just 'cause I don't want to eat
your stinkin' beans!

Wrong.
I am being totally unfair

because that is my job!

Now, you sit down and have
a nice dinner with your family.

I hate you.
Hey!

I say disown her.

I wanted to do a show

that was about real people, that wasn't about,

"Honey, bathroom bowl needs cleaning."

I wanted to do a show that was,
like, just the joy

and the horror of, like, life.

Every person from a family
recognizes all that stuff.

Human beings are a huge pain in the ass.

How do any of them get along
with any others of them?

Knock it off!

They really don't, actually.

Sometimes, I just --
I don't know what to do.

Sometimes I just want to smack you!

You're stuck with your family.

There's nothing you can do about them,

and you put up with stuff from your family

that you wouldn't put up
with from anybody else.

What do you mean, he don't eat no meat?

Oh, that's okay.
That's okay.

I make lamb.

Come.

Anything that you find
horrifying as a kid,

just write it down

because when you're older,
you can make money off it.

"You used to scream all night,
we didn't feed you.

You turned out fine."

I didn't turn out fine!
I'm a fat comedian with OCD.

I get up in front of strangers
and talk about my dick.

This is not good parenting.

I feel like I was
just here a minute ago.

I know what you mean,
but you'll get used to it.

Everybody does, eventually.

The workplace is something
we all have to endure

in some way or another.

I gotta get out of here.
I think I'm gonna lose it.

Uh-oh.

Sounds like somebody's
got a case of the Mondays.

You can go to work on a TV show,

you can go to work in an insurance office,

you're still gonna have a boss,

you're gonna have a pain-in-the-ass worker,

you got somebody maybe you're attracted to,

and you gotta deal with that.

So, this is a human experience

that transcends all generations.

Comedy's about an imbalance in power.

Everybody who's ever had a job
realizes it's a power imbalance

the minute that they get there.

I'm the new vice president
of East Coast Television

and Microwave Oven Programming.

That sounds like you program microwave ovens.

I like you.

You have the boldness of a much younger woman.

So, you go to work,
and your boss is an asshole.

If you write a joke about him,
and everyone laughs at him...

Is that decaf?
No, no, it's regular.

...suddenly, you go from being
his victim to being his captor.

The joke is refiguring the scales of justice.

When you were dismissing some of the staff,

did you intend to fire me, too?

Especiallyme.

I wanted to check.

I'm very sorry I troubled you,

you little runt!

Early sitcoms were just about home life,

and I used to make the joke all the time,

in "Ozzie and Harriet,"

you know, what did Ozzie do for a living?

And then Van Dyke was the first time

you saw his home life and his work life.

Oh, is that the comedy spot?

No, bubble-head, thisis a comedy spot.

Rob!
Buddy.

Sally.
Mel.

Rob!
Sally!

Buddy!

Go ahead, Curly, it's your turn.
Say, "Rob."

Rob!

Oh, wonderful, wonderful.

Somebody asked me to do a situation comedy

after I finished being on the "Show of Shows"

because situation comedies weren't very good.

They didn't mirror life.

I asked myself, what piece of ground

do I stand on that nobody else stands on?

Well, I worked as an actor/writer

on a variety show,

and I write about what happens at home.

And at home, I talk about
what goes on at the office.

Are you doing this because
you're afraid of Alan?

No, I'm doing it because I respect Alan Brady.

A man of his caliber
has great firing power.

Oh, geez.

It was a hybrid
of family life/work life,

and you cared about them like a family

because you saw them together every day.

They werea family.

Afternoon, everybody.

Norm! Norm!
Norm!

Hey, Mr. Peterson,

there's a cold one waiting for you.

I know.
And if she calls, I'm not here.

On TV, family sort of transcends blood.

You recognize that family system,

that family dynamic even
if it's not biological.

Sure, things didn't go your way.

Sure, we're a little disappointed,

but we'll get over it.

What's important here is that you tried

to do the wrong thing.

Hey, that's right.
I did, didn't I?

Sammy! Sammy!
Sammy! Sammy!

You have certain archetypes in the bar,

in the office, in the workplace,
in the taxi company.

They're there because they are real

and they're honest and they're true

and we all recognize them.

I don't deserve this.

You know? God damn it, I don't, but you do.

Because you are all losers!

Every motherfucking one of you.

Loser.

Loser!

The worst word you can hear

when you're trying to make a comedy

is "likable" from the suits.

It's not believable if everybody's likable.

We're not!

What's happened to the old idea

of doing something for your fellow man,

of service?

I mean, today, people just --
Mr. Fawlty!

Yes, I'm coming, I'm coming!
Wait a moment!

There's no comedy in likable.

I always go to Louie De Palma

on "Taxi," played by Danny DeVito.

Sunshine Cab!

Hey, crazy lady, gimme a break here!

It's Ma.

This was a troll -- mean,
said the worst possible things.

Is that likable?
No.

Is it lovable?
Yes.

Why?
He's really funny.

This guy does the best Ali G impersonation.

Ay! I can't.
You do it.

Go on.

I-I don't.
I think you mean someone else.

Oh! Sorry.

No, it's not you.
It's the other one.

The other --
The other what?

Um...

Paki?

Ah, that's racist.

I think the thing that made "The Office"

successful with Ricky Gervais

was the realism was more
relationship-oriented

and commented on
the mundaneness of situations

that we all find ourselves in.

If I have to work with him
for another day,

I'm just -- I will --
I will slit my throat.

You won't do it like that, though.

You get the knife in behind the windpipe,

pull it down, like that.

Or I could just apply for another job.

The jokes or the stories or
the emotion isn't from the work.

It's from the people who work together.

All right.
Where to first?

Your mother's butt.

All you need to relate is the human connection,

the believability

that these people live together,

know each other, love each other.

And it's that love underneath that allows

for all kinds of behavior.

I, um --
I can't argue with this.

"Puberty usually begins
between the ages of 11 and 14,

when profound hormonal changes occur.

The onset of these changes

is the function of a small gland

called the pituitary.

This gland sends chemical
signals throughout the body,

most notably resulting in height increase

and hair growth in the genital area.

Hey! Hey!
Knock it off.

Think this is funny?

Just try me.

Okay.

People love coming-of-age comedy

because it's innocence
to not innocence, you know?

Obstacles to growing up,

obstacles to maturing
are always really hilarious

because most of the time
things did not go well.

You don't know how to deal
with the emotions of it,

the physical aspects of it,

and so it's just gonna be very embarrassing.

Fred, she's gotten her boobies.

Oh!

I'd better go get my magnifying glass.

When I was in high school
and my mother said to me,

"Some day you'll look back
on all this and laugh,"

I didn't realize it would take like 20 years.

But ultimately, she was right.

My two front teeth didn't fall out

until I was in fifth grade.

Which is late.

And that same week, I got my period.

Which is early.

Any stage of life,

if you tell a story honestly, it can be funny.

That's what people connect with.

Everybody's been 12 years old.

Everybody knows what that feels like.

Were you typical?

Yeah, I was typical of a --

of a, I guess a young, budding future pervert.

Ever been sitting around

when you was young, man,
and just sitting in class,

and your dick get hard for nothing?

You'll be just sitting there, and your dick say,

"Hey, what's going on in here?"

That's when your teacher said,

"Mr. Murphy, want to come work
out this problem on the board?"

We're just trying to figure out
how to be humans,

and your body's changing.

And you're becoming aware
of how it's changing,

and sex is just this crazy, mysterious thing.

Jim?

Well, we'll just tell your mother

that we ate it all.

Let's face it, all of these unpleasant subjects,

one way of dealing with them is humor.

I can't believe this.
They fucking forgot my birthday.

John Hughes captured many different eras of life,

but he was one of the great storytellers

about being a high school student.

He took his teenage characters

incredibly seriously --
all of them.

I loathe the bus.

"Sixteen Candles"
was a revelation to me as a kid

because I thought,
"Oh, I'm Anthony Michael Hall.

That's who I am."

All right.

I knew you'd come around.

It epitomizes what it's like to be 15, 14,

you know, a freshman.

You know, he's anxious to be
at the senior parties,

anxious to be with this girl, you know.

That guy, who's normally
made fun of in other movies,

is a hero in this movie.

Farmer Ted is, you know, you could argue,

the lead of that flick for a lot of us.

Very nice.

We're five minutes and --

I'm at a loss.

Prior to John Hughes,

most of the comedies weren't aimed at us.

The teenager to us in the movies

was Olivia Newton-John and John Travolta.

These kids, when they were
in high school looked like,

you know, my parents.

It was kind of like he woke up
one day and was like,

"This is an entirely
underserved audience here.

Let's make movies about them,
for them, on their level,

talking the way they talk,

using actors that look their age."

I think one of the mistakes

that is commonly made
in Hollywood teenage pictures

is that they're going for the bucks,

and they're not going for the heart.

I think he's very honest,

and that he doesn't try to show us

for something that we're not.

He took the simplest of canvasses

and ones we were all familiar with.

Bueller?
Growing up...

Bueller.
...staying home from school,

the sneaky stuff we like to pull off.

Life moves pretty fast.

You don't stop and look around once in a while,

you could miss it.

John was obsessed

with sort of the middle-American outlook on life.

There is no clearer expression
of John's affection

for what is a flawed society,
but he loves it.

All right, that's it.

I'm gonna be right outside those doors.

The next time I have to come in here,

I'm cracking skulls.

He celebrated the normalcy in all of us.

He made it bigger.
He made the attention an event.

He made oddballs okay.

And we're all pretty bizarre.

Some of us are just better
at hiding it, that's all.

Oh, God.

Because he has cracked the code

with the teen audience,
others that followed realized,

"Oh, you don't have to talk down to 'em,

you can talk up to 'em,
or talk right at their level."

Man, I hate high school.

On "Freaks and Geeks,"

what was important to everybody at the show

was that it realistic.

Oh, my God!

All right, come on, guys, let's go!

Would somebody please tell me

what's supposed to be fun about this?

Paul Feig wrote characters
that were more authentic.

He really, more than anyone else,

to me, understands,

really, what it was like and hasn't forgotten

what it was like to feel like an outcast.

Homo.

Hey, hey, hey!

Now -- Now, if Sam wearing
something different to express

his individuality makes him a homo,

well, then, I guess

we should all be proud to be homos.

Now, you go ahead, Sam.

Paul had this idea

that he wanted to see a high school show

about the kids no one ever talked about.

You're dead, Weir.

That was very different
for network television.

What seemed bizarre to them --

Why did they fail all the time?

And we just thought,
because you fail all the time.

It was that simple.

I guess we live on the same floor.

If you live on this floor.

I don't know where you live.
I --

What I love about Judd Apatow

is that he took the smartness
of the John Hughes

but let the kids be a little
less articulate about it.

They're a little more lost.

They're not quite as sure of themselves.

It's just not fair

that they get to flaunt that stuff, you know,

when like, I have to hide
every erection I get.

I mean, just imagine if girls
weren't weirded out

by our boners and stuff and just,

like, wanted to see them.

I mean, that's the world
I want to one day live in.

No matter how much we try
to add new viewpoints to it,

we're still the same people
reacting to the same change,

and there's something
really startling about that.

Boop, boop, boop.

If you get to the heart of it,
beyond all the funny,

and find out there's a ticking, living,

breathing heart there
that you can identify with,

you've got the audience.

I love you.

I love you.

Women know what men want.
Men know what men want.

What do we want?

We want women.
That's it.

It's the only thing we know
for sure, it really is.

We want women.
How do we get them?

Oh, we don't know about that.
We don't know.

The reason relationships
are such a fertile area

for comedy is because what's --

what do you look for in life

anything more than love, except maybe money?

And money's just so not funny.

How man women's purses
are about five pounds heavier

in case you do sleep elsewhere this evening?

You guys may think we're being spontaneous,

but women have to pack
for these events, boy.

Whether you're in a very
insanely committed relationship,

or you've been dating somebody for a couple days,

you can recognize the ridiculousness

of this situation.

Like, we go through an awful lot...

...you know, just to get naked with people.

The only time I get hit on
is last call at the bar.

What a weird time of night, right?

The lights go on,

it just feels real rapey all of a sudden.

You see some dude in a full blackout

just walking at me like a zombie,

just pointing at his own dick like, "Here."

I'm like, "I'll get us a cab."

Romance is a great source for comedy

because everybody wants it.

Also, romance gives people
instant vulnerability.

It's a situation where stakes are really high,

and whenever the stakes are really high,

funny shit's gonna happen.

Did you want to see some brochures?

Ooh!

This is so awkward.
I really want you to leave,

but I don't know how to say it
without sounding like a dick.

Oh.

The idea that human beings couple up,

you know, for good, it's ridiculous.

Imagine if marriage didn't exist.

You're a guy, and you ask
a woman to get married.

You'd be like, "Hey, so, you know,

we've been hanging out together all the time,

spending a lot of time
together and everything."

"Yeah, yeah, I know."

"I want to keep doing that till you're dead."

It doesn't really make sense.

Because of that, it's rife with comedy.

That's terrible,

when the relationship is over,

but only you know.

And you're gonna break up,

but there just isn't a good time.

You just bought concert tickets.

A war breaks out.

You want your birthday present first.

Are you breaking up with me?

You know, I can't believe
I even thought of getting

back together with you.

We are so over.

Fine by me!

If I had a terrible breakup,

I would just come and wail about the breakup,

and I think because it was so real and honest,

it related to people.

It's actually really comforting to realize

that something that is just
truly troubling in your life

could be great fodder for comedy.

Now, those were the days

when people knew how to be in love.

You're a basket case.

They knew it.

Time, distance, nothing could separate them

because they knew it was right,

it was real, it was --

A movie.

That's your problem.
You don't want to be in love.

You want to be in love in a movie.

We have a love-hate relationship
with romantic comedies

because it sets these ideals

that you could never reach,
but love is so relatable,

you immediately empathize
with one of the people,

and you feel like you're falling in love.

Did you put that
breakfast burrito on my desk?

I just thought you might be hungry.

That's why I love you.

I love you, too.

Oh.

Yeah.

Yeah, you're right, I needed that.

The cliché about romantic comedies

is it's boy meets girl, boy gets girl,

boy loses girl, boy gets girl back.

There's no new stories, in that respect.

It's just, what's your take on the old story?

Alvy?

Let's face it.

You know, I don't think
our relationship is working.

I know.

A relationship, I think, is like a shark.

You know, it has to constantly
move forward, or it dies.

And I think what we got
on our hands is a dead shark.

"Annie Hall" was a game changer.

Woody said, "I want to do
a real film about real people,

where you could care about the characters

and be somewhat emotionally invested."

I think we better call
this relationship quits.

That's fine, that's fine, that's great.

Well, I don't know what I did wrong.

I mean, I can't believe this.

Somewhere, she cooled off to me.

Is -- Is it something that I did?

It's never something you do.
That's how people are.

Love fades.

Love fades?

God, that's a depressing thought.

There's no, you know,

happy ending with a neat bow tie at the end.

But ironically, "Annie Hall"

became one of the funniest movies ever.

It changed so much about
the way people thought of,

you know, romantic comedies.

One of the summer's
surprise hit movies stars

Billy Crystal and Meg Ryan.

It's called "When Harry met Sally."

Men and women can't be friends

because the sex part always gets in the way.

That's not true.

I have a number of men friends,
and there is no sex involved.

No, you don't.
Yes, I do.

No, you don't.
Yes, I do.

You only think you do.

You're saying I'm having sex

with these men without my knowledge?

No, what I'm saying is they
all want to have sex with you.

Nora Ephron wrote "When Harry Met Sally,"

and she got a lot of help

from Reiner creating
the neurotic main character.

That's because he was based on Rob Reiner.

"When Harry Met Sally" was, you know --

it was an extension

of what I had been through as a single person,

having been married for 10 years

and then being single for 10 years.

It was the experiences I had
with trying to get with women

and, you know, the confusion of,

can you be friends with a woman?

And if you have sex,
does it ruin the friendship?

Why can't we get past this?

I mean, are we gonna
carry this thing around forever?

Forever?
It just happened.

It happened three weeks ago.

You know how a year to a person
is like seven years to a dog?

Yes.

Is one of us supposed
to be a dog in this scenario?

Rob Reiner's collaboration with Nora Ephron,

they very much both worked together

to have an equal female and male perspective.

There are a lot of desperate women

out there looking for love.

Especially over a certain age.

You know, it's easier
to get killed by a terrorist

than it is to get married over the age of 40.

That is not true.
That statistic is not true.

That's right.
It's not true,

But it feels true.

Even a romantic comedy where you know

what's gonna happen,

there's still something satisfying about it.

I don't know why, but there's
still something that works.

I mean, that's why they use
the formula over and over.

I mean, love is the bottom line,

and there are so many billions
of ways to be with somebody.

It's never finished.

Relationship material is never finished.

Frankly, I wish I just had someone

I really cared about that I could hold.

But I don't have that person, so...

I'm just gonna jerk off and go to bed.

Aren't people stupid?

Not us, it's the others.
You ever notice...

Why is it...
Did you ever catch yourself...

Hey, does anybody else...

Why are hemorrhoids called hemorrhoids,

and asteroids called asteroids?

Wouldn't it make more sense
if it was the other way around?

But then if that was true,
you wouldn't be a proctologist.

You'd be an astronaut.

There's so many things that are distasteful

in life, and stupid.

There are these rules
that everybody has to follow.

It's tedious, so they deserve lampooning.

This was an awful morning.

Like, I get up this morning,

I put my maxi pad on adhesive side up.

Oh, come on, you've done it.

There is so much comedy
in the little details of life.

It's just taking a magnifying glass

and throwing it out to the audience.

Well, that's sort of my job,
to think about stuff

that a lot of us are too busy
for most of the time.

Little things that occur to us.

We have universal ground, you know.

Like, did you ever --

did you ever belch and almost puke?

We think that we're alone,

and then a comedian steps onstage and says,

"Have you ever noticed --"
Kaboom, it explodes.

In that moment, we all connect,

which is an amazing charge, really.

It's kind of an adrenaline rush

to connect on that kind of a level.

We have to fight these battles.

We're all alone in the bathroom.

Alone!

Whatever goes wrong, you have to handle it.

Did you ever flush a toilet in a big party,

and the water starts coming up?

This is the most frightening moment

in the life of a human being.

It's an illumination on something

that was right in front of you.

It was right there, but yet,
when they bring it up --

It's the way they shine the light on it.

What --
What are we doing?

What in God's name are we doing?

What?

What --
What kind of lives are these?

We're like children.
We're not men.

No, we're not.
We're not men.

We're pathetic, you know that?

Yeah, like I don't know that I'm pathetic.

"Seinfeld," you know, initially was,

they called it the show about nothing.

I mean, obviously, it was not about nothing,

but that's what they called it.

The initial idea was Larry David
and Jerry had an idea

about just two guys hanging out
and talking about stuff.

Listen to this.

Marcy comes over,

and she tells me that her ex-boyfriend

was over late last night,
"And yada, yada, yada,

I'm really tired today."

What do you think she was tired from?

Well, obviously, the "yada, yada."

Larry David and Jerry Seinfeld,
those two minds together,

you know, that's just comedy dynamite.

What do you think did it?

Can you take a step back
and say, "This made this show"?

I think it was the style
of the writing was fresh,

and I think it was the strength of the cast.

The cast is very, very strong,

and the writing had a different sound to it.

The conversation sounded different

than the other sitcoms that you see.

So, you think you're spongeworthy?

Yes, I think I'm spongeworthy.

I think I'm veryspongeworthy.

I'm out there, Jerry,

and I'm lovin' every minute of it!

The ideas were seemingly insignificant,

where the comedy came from.

Usually small, quirky, idiotic things.

Larry always carried this
little notepad in his pocket.

Whenever something would
happen that he thought

would make a good idea, you know,

he'd write it down,

and eventually, it would wind up in a show.

You mean shrinkage?

Yes!

Significant shrinkage.

It's a little thing that I might notice

that I could expound on.

Expound on or expand on?

Expand on.

Both.

Both, expound and expand, yeah.

I got it.
Oh, no, no, no, I'd like to pay for mine.

Now, Julie, Julie, don't insult me.

What difference does it
make who pays for lunch?

It's totally meaningless.

Okay.
Thanks, George.

Here's your big salad to go.

Oh, thank you.

I remember I was editing an episode with Larry,

and we took a break for dinner,

and he turned to the editor and he said,

"Carol and I are gonna get a bite.

Would you like something from the restaurant?"

And she said, "Yeah, will you
bring me back a big salad?"

And when we got back to the editing room,

I took the salad, and I gave it to Janet.

Thank you, Julie.

Oh, you're very welcome.

And then, like, two months later,

there's an episode that he's
written called "The Big Salad."

She just took credit for my salad.

That's not right.
No, it isn't.

I mean, I'm the one that bought it.
Yes, you did.

Don't you think she should have said something?

She could have.
Oh, I know.

It's, like, "Hmm, I wonder where that came from.

Oh, right, that was me.
Perfect."

A lot of Larry's humor
is based on the difficulty

of just being out in the world.

Smile.

And everything is a land mine

waiting for you to step on it.

Hey, mind your business.
How about that?

We all think that shit,

but Larry just points it out, you know?

It's so great.

it's just material.

I know, but really, look at these pants.

I've seen pants bunch up before, yes.

I have never seen a bunch-up
like this in my life.

I have.
This is like a five-inch bunch-up I got here.

"Curb Your Enthusiasm" is brilliant.

Larry took the essence
of himself, of Larry David.

I mean, it's not exactly Larry,
but it's pretty damn close,

and when you get close to the bone,

the audience can somehow
feel that that's real.

Get me off the speakerphone, please!

Hold on.
Now you're off the speakerphone.

What's the matter with you?

I thought I was having a private conversation.

I didn't know anybody else was in your car.

I think with "Curb,"

Larry gets to be
the full completion of himself.

It was the person I'd like to be,

but social mores prevent me

from being that way all the time.

Hey!

I'll call --
I'll call you back.

What --
What the hell are you doing?

What the fuck are you doing?

What am Idoing?
What are youdoing?

We decided that we should walk this line

where people watching it
wouldn't quite be certain

if it was really a documentary
or if it was embellished,

but to play it as close to real as possible.

And sure enough, there were
people who thought it was real.

When you walk through my door,
you play by my rules.

You take off your fucking shoes!

My feet have a tendency

to get a little chilly when I take my --

He's a psychotic.
Get him out of the house.

Gil!

I had no idea that,

until the show was on the air,

that anybody would ever have to leave the room

because they couldn't bear to watch a scene

because they were cringing as
to what was about to take place.

I kind of liked it, yeah.

Thank you for fixing Judy's hair.

Oh, you're welcome.

Mommy!
Mommy!

That bald man's in the bathroom,

and there's something hard in his pants!

Kick his ass!

Pervert!

Let's get him!

It always seems like such a shame

to just dump this in the trash.

Maybe birds would like
to make nests with it

or, I don't know, maybe you boys

could use it for school projects.

Arms up.

People love family comedies.

Dude.

And now it seems like
the family comedies they want

are, how strange can this family possibly be?

And now I'm expected to climb
back on top of Kitty

and do my thing again.

I mean, this family runs into problems,

it's, "Oh, let's have Gob our way out of it.
" What is wrong with you?

What is the matter with you?
Hey, come on.

There's a lot more variety

in families represented on television today

because it's represented in real life.

Okay, you're --
He's our son.

And my grandson.
I'm his daughter.

So, you're --
His uncle.

Cryer: I have to believe that,
for kids of today,

seeing that families can come

in all kinds of weird permutations

has to be pretty great.

What the hell is that?

I had Andre do it while we were gone.

We're floating above her,
always there to protect her.

Okay, well, that's reassuring, right, Lily?

Yes, we tore you away
from everything you know,

but don't worry, things are normal here.

Your fathers are floating fairies.

A show such as "Modern Family"
or "Will & Grace" before that

really sped up the conversation

about gay marriage and people's tolerance.

Huge news!

I have met -- are you ready
for this? -- Mr. Right.

Well, Mr. Right Now, anyway.
Ba-dum-bum.

Good night, folks.
I'm here all week. Jack 2000!

He works over at the Jumpin' Java --

you know, that coffee shop
on 72nd -- and his name is Paul.

He is cute with a capital "Q."

Seeing people you don't normally get

to see makes you realize,

oh, you should love them as
much as you love anybody else.

That's the finger.

Work in progress.

We're trying to actually say

that my family's different than yours.

You know, but if you look close enough,

you might see some things
that your family is, too.

Hey!
Hm?

Why don't the boys go with you?

Yeah!
Oh, no, no, not you.

You're way too precious to me.

Good.
Because Junior is the bad black person

who needs educating,

but after we get home,

he'll be a bona fide Black Panther.

Actually, Dr. King had problems
with the Black Panthers.

Do you know who the Black
Panthers had a problem with?

I think television has a history

of helping us figure out how to deal

with some very difficult discussions

or changes in our time.

Listen, can we just close up
shop here a little bit?

The knees.

Your male privilege
is leaking all over the place.

The fearlessness of comedians
bringing up subject matter

that we're afraid to talk about

is a wonderful conduit
to starting a conversation.

Keep yourself up and owning it.

Yeah.

I don't wanna freak you out,

but I think that I may be
the voice of my generation.

Or at least avoice of ageneration.

There's a number of amazingly great,

unique-voiced shows that are on TV right now.

They are standing apart from the wave of stuff

that's being thrown at us all the time.

The guy said this was their best-selling thing,

by far, okay?

I'm just trying to improve our sex lives.

Okay, well, here's an idea.

How about you stop rubbing your eye

every time you shove your junk in me?
What?

Yeah, you're always like...

It's distracting.

Now we're in this weird world
where there's a demand

that people take chances.

No one wants generic stuff anymore.

Mom, Dad, we've got something
we'd like to tell you --

talk to you about.

Um, it's lovely news.

that I think will --
will make you very happy,

and that's...

we're getting married.

Congratulations.

Thanks, Mum.

Thought you were gonna tell us

you were pregnant there for a minute.

And I'm pregnant.
That's also part of this.

The more realistic comedy gets,

the more drama is in them, because real life

is not just drama all the time,

and it's not just funny all the time.

Why do you say such hurtful things?

Because it's the only way
to get your attention.

That's why I have a rage problem.

Oh, shut up, all of you!

Can I talk?
Is it my turn yet?

I've waited 45 years to talk!

I screwed up my life!

I lost the best shitty job I could find!

I'm mentally doomed!

Look at all of you!
It's all your fault!

You're all disasters!

I don't want to be in this family anymore!

Wah, wah, wah.
What a baby.

What's great about comedy

is that comedy can't exist
unless it's true.

You don't laugh unless you know
there's an inherent truth to it.

Oh, my God.

I keep forgetting what
a freak show this family is

until somebody new comes in
and looks at us like that.

We all are human and fallible

and we're crazy and we have foibles

and we're all in it together.

There's nothing more interesting

than the foolishness of the human condition.

It takes the comedian to find the moment

that helps people laugh at themselves.

If you're lucky in life,
you will have seen it,

done it, eaten it,

fucked it, you know, all of it.

And now you can relive it
through storytelling

and from somebody's point
of view all over again.

Life is not that complicated.

You get up, you go to work,
you eat three meals,

you take one good shit,
and you go back to bed.

What's the fucking mystery?

When you see these things,
do you keep track of them?

I'm interested.
I do.

I write them down on a small pad.

Once I lost a pad, and it was --

it was the worst experience of my life.

And you can never get them back

because these incidents
where you get the thoughts,

it's -- it's very specific.

It never happens again.
It only happens that one time.

All those ideas -- gone.
They're still gone.

I've never thought of
one of those things again.