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These are the user uploaded subtitles that are being translated: 1 00:00:00,446 --> 00:00:02,856 (rock music) 2 00:00:36,730 --> 00:00:37,610 - Where were you? 3 00:00:37,612 --> 00:00:40,012 - Hanging out with the women of my camogie team. 4 00:00:41,255 --> 00:00:44,005 Camogie, the stick and ball team sport played by women. 5 00:00:45,060 --> 00:00:48,250 Camogie, it's almost identical to curling played by men 6 00:00:48,250 --> 00:00:49,210 but it's played by women. 7 00:00:49,210 --> 00:00:51,290 - How am I supposed to watch Different Strokes in peace? 8 00:00:51,290 --> 00:00:53,560 I have 6 to 8 kids up in the attic screaming to get out 9 00:00:53,561 --> 00:00:54,761 and wanting to be fed. 10 00:00:54,760 --> 00:00:56,190 They'd be wrecking me head all day. 11 00:00:56,193 --> 00:00:58,783 (upbeat music) 12 00:01:20,185 --> 00:01:21,015 (laughing) 13 00:01:21,018 --> 00:01:21,848 Sick. 14 00:01:22,920 --> 00:01:23,970 You're not going out again. 15 00:01:23,970 --> 00:01:25,310 - Excuse me. 16 00:01:25,310 --> 00:01:27,150 I'm part of the local camogie team 17 00:01:27,150 --> 00:01:28,390 and they love me. 18 00:01:28,390 --> 00:01:29,710 Okay, maybe love is a strong word. 19 00:01:29,710 --> 00:01:32,420 They know my name and it's a sisterhood. 20 00:01:32,418 --> 00:01:34,868 A group of sassy women who talk about each other 21 00:01:34,872 --> 00:01:37,742 behind their backs and fantasize about each others husbands. 22 00:01:37,740 --> 00:01:39,120 It's perfect for me. 23 00:01:39,120 --> 00:01:41,520 - I reckon women played a shitty version of a man's game 24 00:01:41,520 --> 00:01:42,350 isn't a sisterhood. 25 00:01:42,353 --> 00:01:43,453 It's a disgrace. 26 00:01:43,450 --> 00:01:44,940 And you're not going out that door again. 27 00:01:44,940 --> 00:01:46,740 Not if I got anything to do with it. 28 00:01:48,286 --> 00:01:51,156 Bridget. 29 00:01:51,156 --> 00:01:52,546 Bridget. 30 00:01:52,546 --> 00:01:53,376 Bridget. 31 00:01:57,129 --> 00:01:57,959 Bridget. 32 00:02:01,596 --> 00:02:02,426 Bridget. 33 00:02:06,489 --> 00:02:08,149 Bridget. 34 00:02:08,150 --> 00:02:10,730 (upbeat music) 35 00:02:29,196 --> 00:02:33,656 - Goalie, goalie, goalie, goalie, goalie, goalie, goalie. 36 00:02:37,100 --> 00:02:39,630 - Cheers to the best goalie in the whole county 37 00:02:39,630 --> 00:02:42,260 and from what I was feeling the best gluts too. 38 00:02:43,179 --> 00:02:44,009 (cheering) 39 00:02:44,012 --> 00:02:45,782 That's the smallest lass in the history of the club. 40 00:02:45,780 --> 00:02:47,570 Well done goalie. 41 00:02:47,570 --> 00:02:49,940 - And yes, I'm not actually the goalie. 42 00:02:49,940 --> 00:02:50,770 That's Concepta. 43 00:02:50,773 --> 00:02:51,793 I'm Bridget. 44 00:02:51,790 --> 00:02:52,800 - Oh, sorry. 45 00:02:52,800 --> 00:02:53,630 Drop her. 46 00:02:53,633 --> 00:02:55,723 (screams) 47 00:02:57,420 --> 00:02:58,250 - Thanks Mary. 48 00:02:58,253 --> 00:03:00,243 - Sure, it was no bother. 49 00:03:00,240 --> 00:03:01,930 I should probably tell you all 50 00:03:01,925 --> 00:03:06,925 that I will be leaving the team for obvious reasons. 51 00:03:07,335 --> 00:03:09,095 - [All] Awe. 52 00:03:09,100 --> 00:03:11,630 - Yeah, I've been so happy these last few months 53 00:03:11,630 --> 00:03:14,980 because I will be starting my new job as 54 00:03:14,980 --> 00:03:17,540 a skydiving instructor next week. 55 00:03:17,540 --> 00:03:19,380 - What are you doing Concepta? 56 00:03:19,380 --> 00:03:20,210 - What Bridget? 57 00:03:20,213 --> 00:03:21,053 - Whatcha doing? 58 00:03:21,046 --> 00:03:24,106 - Concepta, I'm delighted for ya. 59 00:03:24,114 --> 00:03:27,744 No, really I am so fricken delighted for ya. 60 00:03:27,740 --> 00:03:30,380 We're all delighted for her ladies, aren't we? 61 00:03:30,382 --> 00:03:33,942 Especially since we face the biggest game 62 00:03:33,940 --> 00:03:36,530 of our entire camogie career. 63 00:03:36,530 --> 00:03:38,510 But I understand Concepta. 64 00:03:38,510 --> 00:03:41,050 No, really I do understand. 65 00:03:43,230 --> 00:03:47,350 No one leaves here without a proper send of though, do they? 66 00:03:47,350 --> 00:03:48,180 - No they don't, Mary. 67 00:03:48,183 --> 00:03:49,583 - Shut up. 68 00:03:49,577 --> 00:03:52,777 Now, it's only tradition that you leave here 69 00:03:52,780 --> 00:03:55,880 with a taste of camogie in your mouth. 70 00:03:55,878 --> 00:03:59,078 You need to taste all the work the girls 71 00:03:59,080 --> 00:04:00,550 have been putting into this club. 72 00:04:00,550 --> 00:04:01,900 Isn't that right ladies? 73 00:04:01,900 --> 00:04:02,730 - Yes Mary. 74 00:04:02,733 --> 00:04:03,573 - Get the tin. 75 00:04:03,566 --> 00:04:04,396 - I'll get it. 76 00:04:04,399 --> 00:04:07,649 - I always keep a stare just in case one of the Marys 77 00:04:07,650 --> 00:04:09,030 step out of line. 78 00:04:09,032 --> 00:04:11,692 - I don't think this is necessary, do you? 79 00:04:14,194 --> 00:04:16,824 - Eat this, it's tradition. 80 00:04:21,720 --> 00:04:22,550 - [Eamon] Where's dinner? 81 00:04:22,553 --> 00:04:23,563 I'm starving. 82 00:04:23,561 --> 00:04:27,481 - Eamon, what are you doing? 83 00:04:27,480 --> 00:04:28,600 - Sorry to interrupt ladies 84 00:04:28,600 --> 00:04:30,350 but get the fuck out of me house. 85 00:04:30,352 --> 00:04:31,962 - He's so funny. 86 00:04:31,960 --> 00:04:32,810 He's hilarious. 87 00:04:32,806 --> 00:04:33,636 He does this all the time. 88 00:04:33,639 --> 00:04:35,339 He's hilarious. 89 00:04:35,340 --> 00:04:37,010 Go, go, go, go, go, go. 90 00:04:37,010 --> 00:04:38,430 What do you think you're doing? 91 00:04:38,432 --> 00:04:39,712 You're not a (mumbles) 92 00:04:39,712 --> 00:04:41,002 with my friends and you're ruining it. 93 00:04:41,000 --> 00:04:42,570 - Bridget, you've been drinking all morning. 94 00:04:42,570 --> 00:04:43,650 I saw two women kiss each other 95 00:04:43,650 --> 00:04:44,480 and that's illegal. 96 00:04:44,483 --> 00:04:45,803 It's absolutely disgraceful. 97 00:04:45,800 --> 00:04:46,630 It's disgusting. 98 00:04:46,633 --> 00:04:47,693 I've never seen such filth in me whole life 99 00:04:47,690 --> 00:04:48,520 when I went in. 100 00:04:48,523 --> 00:04:49,363 - What? 101 00:04:49,356 --> 00:04:50,186 - Yeah, I want to join team. 102 00:04:50,189 --> 00:04:51,019 - Well you can't. 103 00:04:51,022 --> 00:04:51,862 You're a man. 104 00:04:51,855 --> 00:04:52,945 You have a beard. 105 00:04:52,950 --> 00:04:53,840 - Have you seen your full back leg. 106 00:04:53,840 --> 00:04:56,490 Ursula, Finula and Edna, they look like the Bee Gees. 107 00:04:59,020 --> 00:05:00,200 I can ruin this on you Bridget 108 00:05:00,200 --> 00:05:01,640 and to do with your hopes and dreams 109 00:05:01,640 --> 00:05:03,200 and easily do it to your stupid camogie team. 110 00:05:03,200 --> 00:05:05,120 - Oh, I'd like to see you try. 111 00:05:05,120 --> 00:05:06,010 - Yeah, I will. 112 00:05:06,013 --> 00:05:07,073 - Go on then. 113 00:05:07,070 --> 00:05:07,900 - Yeah, I will go on. 114 00:05:07,903 --> 00:05:08,743 - Why'd I say try? 115 00:05:08,736 --> 00:05:09,566 - I said it first. 116 00:05:09,569 --> 00:05:10,399 - No, I said. 117 00:05:10,402 --> 00:05:11,392 - No, I said it first. (mumbles) 118 00:05:11,394 --> 00:05:13,144 - You said you were gonna ruin my. 119 00:05:13,136 --> 00:05:13,966 - My words. 120 00:05:13,969 --> 00:05:14,799 - You said, lalala. 121 00:05:14,802 --> 00:05:15,642 You said you're going to ruin. 122 00:05:15,635 --> 00:05:17,375 I said I'd like to see you try. 123 00:05:17,380 --> 00:05:18,960 - I will. 124 00:05:18,960 --> 00:05:19,910 Mark my words. 125 00:05:19,910 --> 00:05:22,290 - Ease up you fucking idiot. 126 00:05:25,448 --> 00:05:27,928 - Looks like the women of this town aren't brave enough 127 00:05:27,930 --> 00:05:29,970 to follow their sisters into battle. 128 00:05:29,970 --> 00:05:30,930 We'll have to call off the game 129 00:05:30,930 --> 00:05:32,080 if we don't get a new goalie. 130 00:05:32,080 --> 00:05:34,760 We can't put the virgin in goals again. 131 00:05:34,761 --> 00:05:37,281 None of the women in this town are brave enough 132 00:05:37,277 --> 00:05:38,887 to fight the good fight. 133 00:05:38,890 --> 00:05:40,020 - Is there going to be a fight? 134 00:05:40,020 --> 00:05:41,470 'Cause I have a huge amount of latent aggression 135 00:05:41,470 --> 00:05:42,940 I'm dying to try on someone. 136 00:05:42,937 --> 00:05:44,877 - No, I meant metaphorically. 137 00:05:44,880 --> 00:05:45,740 - Oh, I've them too. 138 00:05:45,739 --> 00:05:46,579 They help me sleep. 139 00:05:46,580 --> 00:05:47,600 Do you want one? 140 00:05:47,600 --> 00:05:49,390 - No, what I meant was-- 141 00:05:49,390 --> 00:05:50,390 - I'm here. 142 00:05:50,390 --> 00:05:51,220 I'm here. 143 00:05:51,223 --> 00:05:54,063 I'm here for the goalie tryouts. 144 00:05:54,061 --> 00:05:54,891 Hello. 145 00:05:54,894 --> 00:05:56,934 - Oh my God. 146 00:05:58,740 --> 00:06:00,310 - I'm here. 147 00:06:00,311 --> 00:06:01,731 (laughing) 148 00:06:01,730 --> 00:06:03,810 - He's a laugh, isn't he? 149 00:06:06,012 --> 00:06:07,252 - I'm here for. 150 00:06:07,246 --> 00:06:09,666 I'm here for the goalie tryouts. 151 00:06:10,530 --> 00:06:11,600 - He's a laugh. 152 00:06:11,600 --> 00:06:12,860 Ignore him. 153 00:06:12,860 --> 00:06:13,810 - Who are you? 154 00:06:13,810 --> 00:06:15,370 - Who am I? 155 00:06:15,368 --> 00:06:16,688 Who are you? 156 00:06:16,690 --> 00:06:17,800 - Mary. 157 00:06:17,800 --> 00:06:19,410 - Yeah, I'm Mary. 158 00:06:19,410 --> 00:06:20,800 - What's your surname Mary? 159 00:06:20,800 --> 00:06:22,670 - Yeah, what's your surname Mary? 160 00:06:23,620 --> 00:06:25,190 - What's your surname? 161 00:06:25,190 --> 00:06:26,170 - O'Brumhall. 162 00:06:26,170 --> 00:06:28,060 - Yeah, that's my surname O'Brumhall. 163 00:06:28,060 --> 00:06:29,950 - So, you're name is Mary O'Brumhall. 164 00:06:29,950 --> 00:06:31,700 - Yep, Mary O'Brumhall. 165 00:06:31,700 --> 00:06:32,530 That's my name. 166 00:06:32,533 --> 00:06:33,373 Don't wear it out. 167 00:06:33,366 --> 00:06:36,666 - Strange because in the last senses of the Irish public 168 00:06:36,670 --> 00:06:40,760 I won a prize that said I was the only Mary O'Brumhall 169 00:06:40,760 --> 00:06:42,500 on the entire island. 170 00:06:42,500 --> 00:06:43,330 Look. 171 00:06:43,333 --> 00:06:44,413 I even brought it with me. 172 00:06:44,410 --> 00:06:47,090 - Oh, there seems to be a bit of a problem Mary. 173 00:06:51,202 --> 00:06:52,502 - I know what's going on here. 174 00:06:52,500 --> 00:06:53,330 It's obvious. 175 00:06:53,333 --> 00:06:55,263 - Really 'cause of them have bushier beards than I do. 176 00:06:55,260 --> 00:06:56,090 - It's how you spell it. 177 00:06:56,093 --> 00:06:57,243 You're probably one of those idiots 178 00:06:57,240 --> 00:06:58,780 that spells it with a double M. 179 00:06:58,782 --> 00:06:59,622 - That's it. 180 00:06:59,615 --> 00:07:00,775 I spell it with two M's. 181 00:07:00,780 --> 00:07:03,760 Mmary, Mary. 182 00:07:03,760 --> 00:07:05,520 - Yeah okay, that makes sense. 183 00:07:05,515 --> 00:07:06,895 - No, it doesn't. 184 00:07:06,900 --> 00:07:09,570 - Oh, well actually there's loads of examples. 185 00:07:09,570 --> 00:07:10,420 There's Aardvark. 186 00:07:11,398 --> 00:07:12,638 There's eel. 187 00:07:12,639 --> 00:07:13,859 Eery. 188 00:07:13,857 --> 00:07:15,387 Llama. 189 00:07:15,390 --> 00:07:16,270 - Shut up Dolores. 190 00:07:16,270 --> 00:07:17,170 She's a he. 191 00:07:17,169 --> 00:07:17,999 - Mary. 192 00:07:18,002 --> 00:07:19,612 Yeah, she (mumbles). 193 00:07:20,680 --> 00:07:22,600 But how are we supposed to tell you apart 194 00:07:22,600 --> 00:07:24,640 from the other 11 Marys on the team? 195 00:07:24,640 --> 00:07:26,220 - Simple you dob. 196 00:07:26,220 --> 00:07:27,970 We just call her Mamary. 197 00:07:27,970 --> 00:07:29,120 - Mamary. 198 00:07:29,120 --> 00:07:31,780 - First of all we have to see if Mamary here is any good. 199 00:07:31,780 --> 00:07:33,510 Get into the goals Mamary. 200 00:07:33,510 --> 00:07:34,530 Right. 201 00:07:34,528 --> 00:07:37,108 (upbeat music) 202 00:07:41,340 --> 00:07:42,170 Right. 203 00:07:42,173 --> 00:07:46,613 Let a real woman see how great Mamary is, shall we? 204 00:07:46,607 --> 00:07:49,187 (upbeat music) 205 00:08:29,160 --> 00:08:30,140 - Sorry. 206 00:08:30,140 --> 00:08:32,350 How does that not hurt Mamary? 207 00:08:32,350 --> 00:08:33,340 - I'll tell you why. 208 00:08:33,340 --> 00:08:35,330 Because Mamary here has tough tits. 209 00:08:35,333 --> 00:08:37,273 That's who I want in goals. 210 00:08:37,270 --> 00:08:38,990 You're playing in the match Mamary. 211 00:08:43,031 --> 00:08:44,501 - Oh, I hope you're happy. 212 00:08:44,500 --> 00:08:46,210 And take off my Playtex cross your heart bra. 213 00:08:46,210 --> 00:08:48,570 You know I've been saving it for a (mumbles) concert. 214 00:08:48,570 --> 00:08:49,400 - No way Bridget. 215 00:08:49,403 --> 00:08:50,243 They love me. 216 00:08:50,236 --> 00:08:51,066 Mighty mask won they out. 217 00:08:51,069 --> 00:08:52,129 - Too much (mumbles). 218 00:08:52,130 --> 00:08:53,660 They think you're a woman. 219 00:08:53,660 --> 00:08:55,580 - I'll just introduce them to me self and go, 220 00:08:55,580 --> 00:08:56,710 this is my best friend Eamon. 221 00:08:56,710 --> 00:08:59,160 He's really lovely and give him a big kiss on the willy. 222 00:08:59,160 --> 00:09:00,560 - You know that time you ate all the asbestos 223 00:09:00,560 --> 00:09:02,140 to hide from the county council, 224 00:09:02,140 --> 00:09:03,370 it made you more stupider. 225 00:09:03,370 --> 00:09:04,270 - Yeah. 226 00:09:04,267 --> 00:09:06,197 Stupidlier, brilliantlier. 227 00:09:06,200 --> 00:09:07,030 - Don't. 228 00:09:07,033 --> 00:09:08,003 I don't know what's worst you fooling all of them 229 00:09:08,000 --> 00:09:10,440 or you wearing my good bra. 230 00:09:10,440 --> 00:09:12,770 - Actually now that I have you Playtex cross your heart bra 231 00:09:12,770 --> 00:09:15,140 is known for having no underwire or hurtful 232 00:09:15,140 --> 00:09:16,190 but it's actually under there. 233 00:09:16,190 --> 00:09:17,020 It's really sore. 234 00:09:17,023 --> 00:09:18,033 - God you prick. 235 00:09:19,389 --> 00:09:21,069 (whistle blows) 236 00:09:21,069 --> 00:09:21,899 - Go on. 237 00:09:21,902 --> 00:09:22,742 Get out there. 238 00:09:22,735 --> 00:09:23,565 Get out there. 239 00:09:23,568 --> 00:09:24,398 Don't be marking space. 240 00:09:24,401 --> 00:09:25,471 Space never scored a goal. 241 00:09:25,469 --> 00:09:26,369 Hey you. 242 00:09:26,371 --> 00:09:27,821 What are you doing over there? 243 00:09:27,820 --> 00:09:28,650 You stand like a statue. 244 00:09:28,653 --> 00:09:29,493 Sorry, you are a statue. 245 00:09:29,486 --> 00:09:31,406 Sorry virgin, very sorry. 246 00:09:31,408 --> 00:09:33,658 (cheering) 247 00:09:38,094 --> 00:09:41,924 - Jesus, that is the first game in over 30 years 248 00:09:41,920 --> 00:09:42,970 that we've won. 249 00:09:42,972 --> 00:09:46,502 Only one more win and we're in the finals. 250 00:09:49,087 --> 00:09:49,917 - Quick question. 251 00:09:49,920 --> 00:09:50,790 How is that possible? 252 00:09:50,786 --> 00:09:53,396 You know, if we've only ever won one game 253 00:09:53,400 --> 00:09:54,840 and we're only one game away from the final. 254 00:09:54,840 --> 00:09:58,470 It just seems too good to be true. 255 00:09:58,470 --> 00:10:00,330 - I tell ya who's too good to be true. 256 00:10:00,330 --> 00:10:01,530 Mamary. 257 00:10:01,530 --> 00:10:02,560 - She was amazing. 258 00:10:02,560 --> 00:10:04,660 Tacked half their team on her own 259 00:10:04,660 --> 00:10:06,690 and most of all ours too. 260 00:10:06,690 --> 00:10:08,420 Kept going for their breasts. 261 00:10:08,420 --> 00:10:09,900 - I saw that. 262 00:10:09,900 --> 00:10:14,900 She, he stayed well away from me. 263 00:10:15,140 --> 00:10:16,390 - I don't care. 264 00:10:16,390 --> 00:10:18,650 Mamary is great and if anybody, 265 00:10:18,650 --> 00:10:20,690 I mean anybody has a problem with that 266 00:10:20,690 --> 00:10:23,040 I'll shove their teeth so far down their throat 267 00:10:23,040 --> 00:10:25,690 they'll be able to graze the curl with their foo foo. 268 00:10:29,880 --> 00:10:31,210 - Oh, come one. 269 00:10:31,210 --> 00:10:34,040 Does anybody not notice anything about him? 270 00:10:34,040 --> 00:10:34,870 Come on anybody? 271 00:10:37,670 --> 00:10:38,560 - Oh my God. 272 00:10:38,560 --> 00:10:39,580 - Finally. 273 00:10:39,580 --> 00:10:41,420 - Everybody over here now. 274 00:10:41,423 --> 00:10:42,263 (mumbles) 275 00:10:42,256 --> 00:10:43,396 Mamary dry yourself. 276 00:10:43,400 --> 00:10:45,120 Quick rub her all over. 277 00:10:45,120 --> 00:10:46,660 We can't risk her getting a cold 278 00:10:46,660 --> 00:10:48,040 for the big semi. 279 00:10:48,040 --> 00:10:52,730 - That's what I'm trying to say that her teeny tiny semi. 280 00:10:52,730 --> 00:10:53,720 - Medium. 281 00:10:53,721 --> 00:10:54,791 - Shut up Bridget. 282 00:10:57,757 --> 00:11:00,007 (laughing) 283 00:11:06,814 --> 00:11:08,974 It's not just about quality. 284 00:11:08,970 --> 00:11:10,290 It's about respect. 285 00:11:10,290 --> 00:11:11,120 - Yeah. 286 00:11:11,123 --> 00:11:11,963 Do you know what? 287 00:11:11,956 --> 00:11:12,786 You have the best of thighs 288 00:11:12,789 --> 00:11:14,269 I've seen in a woman in a longtime. 289 00:11:14,270 --> 00:11:16,210 - Mamary, you're a scream. 290 00:11:17,920 --> 00:11:19,360 - What about what you got in between your knees? 291 00:11:19,360 --> 00:11:20,190 - Shut up Bridget. 292 00:11:20,193 --> 00:11:21,383 Good point though. 293 00:11:23,520 --> 00:11:25,770 (laughing) 294 00:11:29,282 --> 00:11:30,662 - It's time for the sisters to take back 295 00:11:30,660 --> 00:11:32,130 what's rightfully ours. 296 00:11:32,130 --> 00:11:34,180 - I mean, they're muscular 297 00:11:34,180 --> 00:11:35,570 but they look soft at the same time 298 00:11:35,570 --> 00:11:37,260 - Are you still talking about my thighs? 299 00:11:37,258 --> 00:11:38,458 - Oh, he is. 300 00:11:38,460 --> 00:11:39,290 He is. 301 00:11:39,293 --> 00:11:40,133 He. 302 00:11:40,126 --> 00:11:40,956 Do you notice I'm saying he? 303 00:11:40,959 --> 00:11:42,169 He. 304 00:11:42,174 --> 00:11:43,014 No, okay. 305 00:11:46,387 --> 00:11:49,047 - I've been able to free trades. 306 00:11:50,016 --> 00:11:51,106 Ow. 307 00:11:51,111 --> 00:11:53,361 (laughing) 308 00:11:54,344 --> 00:11:55,914 Yeah, (mumbles) too. 309 00:11:55,908 --> 00:11:57,688 - Do you understand what I'm saying Mamary? 310 00:11:57,690 --> 00:11:59,290 It's about how men oppress women. 311 00:11:59,290 --> 00:12:02,130 If a man could see things from our point of view 312 00:12:02,130 --> 00:12:04,470 he'd see how difficult it is being a woman, 313 00:12:04,470 --> 00:12:06,500 really difficult. 314 00:12:06,500 --> 00:12:09,040 - See things from a woman's point of view. 315 00:12:10,320 --> 00:12:11,780 A woman's point of view. 316 00:12:12,697 --> 00:12:15,217 A woman's point of view. 317 00:12:15,221 --> 00:12:17,801 (upbeat music) 318 00:12:36,680 --> 00:12:38,280 Oh my God, I get it. 319 00:12:38,280 --> 00:12:39,500 I get it. 320 00:12:39,500 --> 00:12:40,330 No, I don't get it. 321 00:12:40,333 --> 00:12:41,563 I have indigestion. 322 00:12:41,560 --> 00:12:43,110 No, I get it. 323 00:12:43,110 --> 00:12:44,360 Women, slaves. 324 00:12:44,360 --> 00:12:45,450 Yeah. 325 00:12:45,450 --> 00:12:46,430 Or maybe it's indigestion. 326 00:12:46,430 --> 00:12:47,350 Is this indigestion? 327 00:12:47,350 --> 00:12:48,180 No, I get it. 328 00:12:48,183 --> 00:12:49,193 Yeah, yeah. 329 00:12:49,190 --> 00:12:50,020 I get it. 330 00:12:50,023 --> 00:12:50,923 From a woman's point of view. 331 00:12:51,850 --> 00:12:53,350 And I have indigestion though. 332 00:12:56,039 --> 00:12:58,289 (clanking) 333 00:13:11,663 --> 00:13:13,393 - Breakfast on the table. 334 00:13:13,390 --> 00:13:15,290 You're all dressed and ready for school. 335 00:13:15,288 --> 00:13:16,288 The kitchen is perfect. 336 00:13:16,291 --> 00:13:17,601 Who did this to you? 337 00:13:17,597 --> 00:13:18,837 - [Eamon] I did. 338 00:13:18,843 --> 00:13:21,383 (screaming) 339 00:13:21,380 --> 00:13:23,960 (upbeat music) 340 00:13:27,218 --> 00:13:29,548 (screaming) 341 00:13:31,280 --> 00:13:32,230 Sorry I did. 342 00:13:32,230 --> 00:13:33,940 I have terrible indigestion. 343 00:13:33,941 --> 00:13:34,771 - Why? 344 00:13:34,774 --> 00:13:35,614 - Why? 345 00:13:35,607 --> 00:13:37,137 Because you're not just some simple housewife, 346 00:13:37,140 --> 00:13:38,310 you're a woman. 347 00:13:38,310 --> 00:13:39,610 A woman who hurts, who laughs, 348 00:13:39,610 --> 00:13:42,050 who cries, who fries food each day 349 00:13:42,050 --> 00:13:44,990 under the impressive regime of me, man. 350 00:13:44,990 --> 00:13:46,660 - Did you (mumbles). 351 00:13:46,660 --> 00:13:47,780 You're going to have to get your stomach pumped. 352 00:13:47,780 --> 00:13:48,760 Forget your coat. 353 00:13:48,760 --> 00:13:50,950 - The only I'm pumped with is the deep rage, 354 00:13:50,950 --> 00:13:54,190 a rage so deep I don't even know how I'm gonna begin 355 00:13:54,190 --> 00:13:55,270 to make it up to you. 356 00:13:55,270 --> 00:13:57,980 - I'll take a bit of deep rage if it's gone. 357 00:13:57,980 --> 00:13:58,810 - Sure. 358 00:13:58,813 --> 00:13:59,663 Take a seat first. 359 00:13:59,660 --> 00:14:01,660 I'll bring you over some breakfast love. 360 00:14:05,034 --> 00:14:07,614 - [Announcer] And here is your host Gay Byrne. 361 00:14:09,460 --> 00:14:10,290 - Time for tea. 362 00:14:10,293 --> 00:14:12,073 - No, you stay there love. 363 00:14:12,070 --> 00:14:12,950 I'll go get the tea. 364 00:14:12,950 --> 00:14:13,780 - Who you talking to? 365 00:14:13,783 --> 00:14:15,313 - It's okay love. 366 00:14:15,313 --> 00:14:16,153 - What? 367 00:14:16,146 --> 00:14:16,976 Me. 368 00:14:16,979 --> 00:14:17,809 (mumbles) 369 00:14:17,812 --> 00:14:18,652 Are you feeling okay? 370 00:14:18,645 --> 00:14:20,265 - What do you mean? 371 00:14:20,273 --> 00:14:21,353 - What do I mean? 372 00:14:21,350 --> 00:14:22,730 I always make the tea when the sick people come on 373 00:14:22,730 --> 00:14:23,560 the late late. 374 00:14:23,563 --> 00:14:24,943 Are you trying to poison me again? 375 00:14:24,938 --> 00:14:25,808 Oh I'm not going to forfeit. 376 00:14:25,810 --> 00:14:26,920 Not this time Eamon. 377 00:14:26,920 --> 00:14:28,080 No, I'm not. 378 00:14:28,080 --> 00:14:32,230 - Bridget, can a person not make another person a cup of tea 379 00:14:32,230 --> 00:14:35,180 without that person questioning this person suspiciously? 380 00:14:36,030 --> 00:14:37,500 - I am not a person. 381 00:14:37,500 --> 00:14:38,940 I'm your wife. 382 00:14:38,940 --> 00:14:40,930 - Oh, you are a person Bridget. 383 00:14:40,930 --> 00:14:42,540 You're not just some badly dressed big ass 384 00:14:42,540 --> 00:14:43,370 narrow minded housewife. 385 00:14:43,373 --> 00:14:44,703 I realize that now. 386 00:14:44,697 --> 00:14:45,827 So, you sit here. 387 00:14:45,832 --> 00:14:46,772 I'll get the tea. 388 00:14:46,773 --> 00:14:47,953 Okay. 389 00:14:47,950 --> 00:14:52,900 Oh, I just nipped out today and bought you some jammy pads. 390 00:14:52,900 --> 00:14:54,980 I noticed you were running low. 391 00:14:57,030 --> 00:14:57,870 I just took one there. 392 00:14:57,870 --> 00:14:58,970 I hope you don't mind. 393 00:15:04,943 --> 00:15:07,573 (upbeat music) 394 00:15:07,570 --> 00:15:09,690 Bridget would you like a drinks or some nuts? 395 00:15:09,690 --> 00:15:11,160 - We have enough nuts. 396 00:15:11,160 --> 00:15:12,500 Thank you very much. 397 00:15:12,500 --> 00:15:15,120 Now piss off back to your crummy little shame house. 398 00:15:16,040 --> 00:15:18,560 - No, I'm grand. 399 00:15:18,560 --> 00:15:19,790 Thanks. 400 00:15:19,790 --> 00:15:22,180 - Mary, you seem a bit aggressive. 401 00:15:22,180 --> 00:15:24,330 Would you like me to catch you a (mumbles). 402 00:15:27,976 --> 00:15:31,226 I want my sexual liberty and gender independence. 403 00:15:31,230 --> 00:15:32,060 I don't think-- 404 00:15:32,063 --> 00:15:33,023 - We have any of that. 405 00:15:33,020 --> 00:15:35,200 But about the match I was thinking I could play 406 00:15:35,200 --> 00:15:37,660 a more full forward role in the semi. 407 00:15:37,660 --> 00:15:39,010 Just a little. 408 00:15:39,011 --> 00:15:41,991 - It's a great idea Bridget. 409 00:15:41,986 --> 00:15:43,876 - Yeah, whatever Eamon. 410 00:15:48,007 --> 00:15:49,507 - Men. 411 00:15:49,510 --> 00:15:53,730 Can't live with them but can kill them. 412 00:15:53,731 --> 00:15:55,981 (laughing) 413 00:16:02,750 --> 00:16:05,000 - Did you say you can kill them? 414 00:16:04,997 --> 00:16:05,827 - Yeah. 415 00:16:05,830 --> 00:16:08,830 (laughing) 416 00:16:08,830 --> 00:16:11,230 - Like kill them like you can legally kill them. 417 00:16:12,380 --> 00:16:14,370 - Not legally, no. 418 00:16:14,370 --> 00:16:16,380 But imagine doing it, it's funny right. 419 00:16:16,376 --> 00:16:18,626 (laughing) 420 00:16:24,069 --> 00:16:28,049 - Anyway, about the match. 421 00:16:28,053 --> 00:16:30,343 - I got to shoot off. 422 00:16:30,336 --> 00:16:32,586 (laughing) 423 00:16:35,589 --> 00:16:36,519 - That's not weird. 424 00:16:36,524 --> 00:16:37,724 That's not weird. 425 00:16:37,720 --> 00:16:38,640 She's my best friend. 426 00:16:38,640 --> 00:16:40,280 It's not weird at all. 427 00:16:41,735 --> 00:16:42,565 Yes. 428 00:16:42,568 --> 00:16:43,398 No. 429 00:16:43,401 --> 00:16:44,231 Left a bit. 430 00:16:44,234 --> 00:16:45,074 Right. 431 00:16:45,067 --> 00:16:45,967 My left. 432 00:16:45,970 --> 00:16:47,190 Okay, right. 433 00:16:49,720 --> 00:16:50,550 Yes lovely. 434 00:16:50,553 --> 00:16:51,393 Okay. 435 00:16:51,386 --> 00:16:52,216 That was great. 436 00:16:52,219 --> 00:16:53,059 Eamon thank you very much. 437 00:16:53,060 --> 00:16:56,780 Oh my God, you have never ever done that to me before. 438 00:16:56,780 --> 00:16:58,310 Oh, there was that time you got very frisky 439 00:16:58,310 --> 00:16:59,270 when I put on your mother's nighty. 440 00:16:59,270 --> 00:17:00,100 No sorry. 441 00:17:00,103 --> 00:17:01,303 You put on your mother's. 442 00:17:04,667 --> 00:17:05,497 Are you crying? 443 00:17:07,577 --> 00:17:11,337 - I just feel so connected to you right now. 444 00:17:12,420 --> 00:17:14,170 I really like it. 445 00:17:14,171 --> 00:17:15,001 (mumbles) 446 00:17:15,004 --> 00:17:15,844 - A drink. 447 00:17:15,837 --> 00:17:17,017 Do you want me to call Frank? 448 00:17:17,019 --> 00:17:17,989 - A cuddle. 449 00:17:17,990 --> 00:17:19,140 - A what? 450 00:17:19,140 --> 00:17:20,810 - Hold me Bridget. 451 00:17:20,810 --> 00:17:22,230 - Hold you. 452 00:17:28,870 --> 00:17:30,060 No, I don't like it. 453 00:17:32,020 --> 00:17:33,960 - Bridget, what's wrong? 454 00:17:33,960 --> 00:17:36,620 Tell me how you're feeling. 455 00:17:36,620 --> 00:17:37,760 - I don't like it. 456 00:17:37,757 --> 00:17:39,047 I can't take you cleaning the house 457 00:17:39,050 --> 00:17:39,930 and doing a better job than me. 458 00:17:39,930 --> 00:17:41,610 I can't take you spending time with those kids. 459 00:17:41,610 --> 00:17:44,260 And I can't taking you wanting to cuddle after sex 460 00:17:44,260 --> 00:17:45,090 and crying. 461 00:17:45,093 --> 00:17:46,103 You big funny! 462 00:17:54,412 --> 00:17:55,252 - I'm okay. 463 00:17:55,245 --> 00:17:56,075 I'm okay. 464 00:17:56,078 --> 00:17:56,908 I'm okay. 465 00:17:56,911 --> 00:17:57,741 I'm okay. 466 00:17:57,744 --> 00:17:58,584 I'm okay. 467 00:17:59,880 --> 00:18:02,220 I'm fine just give me two minutes. 468 00:18:02,220 --> 00:18:03,470 Just give me two minutes. 469 00:18:04,400 --> 00:18:05,990 - Do you want a hot water bottle? 470 00:18:05,987 --> 00:18:07,497 - Yeah. 471 00:18:07,498 --> 00:18:11,078 Can I get some chocolate, maybe a magazine? 472 00:18:14,970 --> 00:18:18,060 - This ends today or tomorrow. 473 00:18:20,680 --> 00:18:22,970 - Oh God, what am I like? 474 00:18:22,973 --> 00:18:24,313 What am I like? 475 00:18:25,618 --> 00:18:28,138 (mumbles) 476 00:18:28,140 --> 00:18:31,010 - Oh, it's nice to talk to people who actually care 477 00:18:31,010 --> 00:18:32,520 about what you're saying. 478 00:18:32,524 --> 00:18:34,354 You know, I try talking to Bridget about it. 479 00:18:34,350 --> 00:18:36,350 She said, "I hate seeing people crying." 480 00:18:37,782 --> 00:18:39,812 And then she called me a funny. 481 00:18:40,785 --> 00:18:41,615 - What a bitch. 482 00:18:41,618 --> 00:18:43,418 - I never liked here. 483 00:18:43,420 --> 00:18:44,250 - Who's Bridget? 484 00:18:45,710 --> 00:18:46,540 - I'm Bridget. 485 00:18:46,543 --> 00:18:47,823 Don't listen to any of that shit. 486 00:18:47,820 --> 00:18:50,470 There's something you need to know about your Mamary. 487 00:18:53,469 --> 00:18:56,179 Mamary is not the Mamary you think Mamary is. 488 00:18:56,181 --> 00:18:59,321 Mamary is my husband. 489 00:18:59,320 --> 00:19:01,070 - That's okay Bridget. 490 00:19:01,070 --> 00:19:03,450 Sure Mary Mulloney and Mary Morrisey have been together 491 00:19:03,450 --> 00:19:06,100 since Mary Morrisey broke it off with her (mumbles). 492 00:19:06,098 --> 00:19:07,138 - What? 493 00:19:07,140 --> 00:19:08,050 No. 494 00:19:08,049 --> 00:19:09,379 - Mamary is my husband. 495 00:19:09,380 --> 00:19:10,630 Mamary is M. 496 00:19:10,630 --> 00:19:11,730 Mamary is a man. 497 00:19:11,730 --> 00:19:13,450 Look, I'll prove it. 498 00:19:15,940 --> 00:19:18,110 Okay, you're going to have to go a little bit closer. 499 00:19:19,430 --> 00:19:20,900 Okay, a little bit closer. 500 00:19:22,640 --> 00:19:24,950 Okay, maybe just a little bit closer. 501 00:19:24,950 --> 00:19:27,950 - Jesus Bridget, it's you I feel sorry for. 502 00:19:28,990 --> 00:19:30,010 - Thanks Mary. 503 00:19:30,010 --> 00:19:32,150 - No, it's you I feel sorry for 504 00:19:32,150 --> 00:19:35,530 and not because of your husband's teeny, tiny micro penis. 505 00:19:35,530 --> 00:19:36,590 - Can I just interject here please? 506 00:19:36,593 --> 00:19:37,723 Right. 507 00:19:37,720 --> 00:19:40,870 The chamber is much bigger than the barrel. 508 00:19:40,870 --> 00:19:42,990 So say the chamber is where the testicles are, 509 00:19:42,990 --> 00:19:46,340 the bullets per say and the barrel is the penis. 510 00:19:46,340 --> 00:19:47,480 Why am I explaining this again? 511 00:19:47,477 --> 00:19:49,387 - I've known all along. 512 00:19:49,390 --> 00:19:51,040 - You have the same problem. 513 00:19:51,040 --> 00:19:51,870 - No. 514 00:19:51,873 --> 00:19:56,503 I've known all along that Mamary was a man. 515 00:19:56,500 --> 00:19:59,180 It's all been part of my plan. 516 00:19:59,180 --> 00:20:01,550 I've just been waiting for a couple stupid enough 517 00:20:01,550 --> 00:20:02,380 to fall for it. 518 00:20:02,383 --> 00:20:03,883 - We're part of a plan? 519 00:20:03,880 --> 00:20:04,710 Great. 520 00:20:04,713 --> 00:20:05,933 What's the plan? 521 00:20:05,930 --> 00:20:08,610 - We're going to shoot Eamon and then tie his dead body 522 00:20:08,610 --> 00:20:11,800 to the goal post for everyone to see. 523 00:20:11,800 --> 00:20:14,390 If no one will pay attention to our camogie team, 524 00:20:14,387 --> 00:20:15,907 I make them. 525 00:20:17,070 --> 00:20:18,220 - Could you not just get better at it? 526 00:20:18,220 --> 00:20:20,240 - What would you know about camogie Eamon? 527 00:20:20,240 --> 00:20:21,300 You're a man. 528 00:20:21,296 --> 00:20:24,416 Well, after seeing that we're not so sure. 529 00:20:24,420 --> 00:20:27,380 (laughing) 530 00:20:27,383 --> 00:20:28,713 - I'm not explaining this again. 531 00:20:28,708 --> 00:20:30,668 - Say goodbye Bridget. 532 00:20:31,720 --> 00:20:32,550 - Bye Eamon. 533 00:20:32,553 --> 00:20:35,153 No about the (mumbles), I say we could try short puck out, 534 00:20:35,150 --> 00:20:35,980 triple punch. 535 00:20:35,983 --> 00:20:37,443 - Tie him up. 536 00:20:37,440 --> 00:20:38,270 - No, no. 537 00:20:38,273 --> 00:20:39,323 No, you should try that short puck out. 538 00:20:39,315 --> 00:20:41,075 You should try that short puck out. 539 00:20:43,840 --> 00:20:45,650 - This is our stand. 540 00:20:45,650 --> 00:20:48,420 He is a small sacrifice to pay for what our sisters 541 00:20:48,421 --> 00:20:51,751 have had to put up with for thousands of years. 542 00:20:51,750 --> 00:20:54,210 Any last words man? 543 00:20:54,210 --> 00:20:55,420 - What? 544 00:20:55,420 --> 00:20:57,550 - Any last words? 545 00:20:57,550 --> 00:20:59,000 - I don't know any (mumbles). 546 00:20:59,873 --> 00:21:00,713 - Any. 547 00:21:00,707 --> 00:21:01,537 You know he can't hear me. 548 00:21:01,540 --> 00:21:03,580 Any last words? 549 00:21:05,310 --> 00:21:07,190 - No, I don't want ham. 550 00:21:07,190 --> 00:21:08,190 Wednesday. 551 00:21:09,060 --> 00:21:10,050 What are you talking about? 552 00:21:10,050 --> 00:21:10,880 I can't. 553 00:21:10,883 --> 00:21:12,473 What? 554 00:21:12,470 --> 00:21:13,610 - Last words. 555 00:21:13,610 --> 00:21:15,070 Any last words? 556 00:21:15,070 --> 00:21:17,620 - For the last time, I don't own a jack russell. 557 00:21:17,620 --> 00:21:19,640 If you've lost a jack Russell contact the local 558 00:21:19,642 --> 00:21:20,542 (mumbles) station. 559 00:21:20,540 --> 00:21:21,400 It's nothing to do with me. 560 00:21:21,400 --> 00:21:23,440 - Any last words? 561 00:21:23,437 --> 00:21:25,697 - I can't hear you. 562 00:21:25,700 --> 00:21:27,680 - Oh, I'm gonna have to go over. 563 00:21:29,396 --> 00:21:30,876 - Any last words? 564 00:21:32,050 --> 00:21:32,880 - Oh yeah, last words. 565 00:21:32,883 --> 00:21:33,723 Yeah, yeah, yeah. 566 00:21:35,180 --> 00:21:38,410 Tell my children that if they didn't come into my life 567 00:21:38,410 --> 00:21:41,550 when they did I'd have a massive (mumbles) by now. 568 00:21:43,481 --> 00:21:45,801 (mumbles) 569 00:21:45,796 --> 00:21:46,626 (screaming) 570 00:21:46,629 --> 00:21:48,799 (gunshot) 571 00:21:49,700 --> 00:21:50,760 - You missed there Mary. 572 00:21:50,760 --> 00:21:52,050 - Yeah, I know but I won't this time. 573 00:21:52,045 --> 00:21:53,185 (gunshot) 574 00:21:53,190 --> 00:21:56,400 - I'll probably be the bass player in Horse Lips. 575 00:21:56,400 --> 00:21:57,450 - No, you missed again. 576 00:21:57,450 --> 00:21:59,670 How many more bullets are left in the chamber? 577 00:21:59,670 --> 00:22:01,670 - Oh, wouldn't it not be easier Mary to go up 578 00:22:01,670 --> 00:22:03,040 and put the gun right up to his head 579 00:22:03,038 --> 00:22:04,618 and blow him away. 580 00:22:04,620 --> 00:22:05,940 Just saying. 581 00:22:05,940 --> 00:22:06,910 No offense Bridget. 582 00:22:06,910 --> 00:22:08,010 - No, no, none taken. 583 00:22:08,010 --> 00:22:09,650 That's how I fantasize about it actually. 584 00:22:09,650 --> 00:22:10,480 - Aw, shut up. 585 00:22:10,483 --> 00:22:11,393 You all do nothing but criticize. 586 00:22:11,390 --> 00:22:13,560 You're just like me mother. 587 00:22:13,560 --> 00:22:14,460 Mary do this. 588 00:22:14,463 --> 00:22:15,383 Mary do that. 589 00:22:15,380 --> 00:22:17,570 Oh, that's not very good now Mary. 590 00:22:17,570 --> 00:22:18,400 Is it? 591 00:22:18,403 --> 00:22:21,663 Oh Mary, your sisters are so much better than you are. 592 00:22:21,660 --> 00:22:23,310 Shut Mary you big (screams). 593 00:22:26,080 --> 00:22:29,970 Oh no, Mary shot herself in the leg. 594 00:22:29,970 --> 00:22:32,240 She's going to have to go on goals. 595 00:22:32,240 --> 00:22:34,510 Try the short puck out. 596 00:22:34,510 --> 00:22:36,060 - Yeah, try the short puck out. 597 00:22:38,520 --> 00:22:40,060 You still cant tie a knot. 598 00:22:40,060 --> 00:22:41,850 You are the biggest bunch of (mumbles) horrors 599 00:22:41,850 --> 00:22:44,300 I've ever hung around with in my whole life. 600 00:22:44,300 --> 00:22:47,110 And I've (mumbles) for the Norland sisters one summer. 601 00:22:48,590 --> 00:22:50,280 I'm keeping the bra. 602 00:22:50,280 --> 00:22:51,360 - Don't listen to him. 603 00:22:52,330 --> 00:22:55,610 Now, I know we haven't had the best preparation 604 00:22:55,610 --> 00:22:58,460 for this match with Mary shooting herself in the leg 605 00:22:58,460 --> 00:23:00,450 and her botched feminist uprising 606 00:23:00,450 --> 00:23:03,570 but we can decide right here, right now, 607 00:23:03,570 --> 00:23:06,650 that we're gonna grab this game by the ball. 608 00:23:06,650 --> 00:23:07,850 Run bottom. 609 00:23:07,850 --> 00:23:09,030 Run bottom. 610 00:23:09,030 --> 00:23:10,760 I kick some ass. 611 00:23:11,610 --> 00:23:14,910 Now, I know there's a lot of body references in there 612 00:23:14,910 --> 00:23:16,530 but you get the jist. 613 00:23:16,533 --> 00:23:20,083 - Oh Bridget that was a very powerful speech. 614 00:23:20,083 --> 00:23:23,153 But can someone please call me an ambulance? 615 00:23:23,150 --> 00:23:24,010 - No time Mary. 616 00:23:24,010 --> 00:23:25,610 Someone get that woman some flat Seven-Up 617 00:23:25,610 --> 00:23:27,540 'cause we have a game to win. 618 00:23:27,540 --> 00:23:28,750 Let's go ladies. 619 00:23:29,920 --> 00:23:32,250 (screaming) 620 00:23:33,825 --> 00:23:36,405 (upbeat music) 621 00:23:40,862 --> 00:23:42,782 (whistle blowing) 622 00:23:42,780 --> 00:23:44,820 - No, no, no. 623 00:23:44,815 --> 00:23:46,335 Oh no, no. 624 00:23:46,337 --> 00:23:48,097 Ladies, it's okay. 625 00:23:48,104 --> 00:23:50,804 There's always badminton. 626 00:23:50,800 --> 00:23:51,750 - Badminton. 627 00:23:51,750 --> 00:23:55,310 You wouldn't last two minutes on the badminton field. 628 00:23:55,307 --> 00:23:56,417 (screaming) 629 00:23:56,416 --> 00:23:57,246 - Okay. 630 00:23:58,154 --> 00:24:00,324 (gunshot) 631 00:24:02,524 --> 00:24:04,944 (rock music) 632 00:24:04,994 --> 00:24:09,544 Repair and Synchronization by Easy Subtitles Synchronizer 1.0.0.0 41379

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