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Would you like to inspect the original subtitles? These are the user uploaded subtitles that are being translated: 1 00:00:00,226 --> 00:00:06,645 ♪ 2 00:00:06,648 --> 00:00:08,057 [CLATTER] 3 00:00:08,059 --> 00:00:09,358 MAN: Crazy, right? 4 00:00:09,360 --> 00:00:11,527 6:30, and all the good stuff's already gone. 5 00:00:11,529 --> 00:00:13,529 This isn't a yard sale. 6 00:00:13,531 --> 00:00:16,973 They sold our house and put my family out on the street. 7 00:00:16,976 --> 00:00:18,868 - 3 bucks. - Cool. 8 00:00:18,870 --> 00:00:20,804 So, what's the plan? 9 00:00:20,807 --> 00:00:22,538 - [WATER SPRAYING] - RAY: Oh! Sprinklers! Oh, no. 10 00:00:22,540 --> 00:00:23,639 Oh! Soap! Soap! 11 00:00:23,641 --> 00:00:24,707 Everyone take soap! 12 00:00:24,709 --> 00:00:25,941 Shower while you can. 13 00:00:25,943 --> 00:00:28,882 The plan is, I will find us a place to live. 14 00:00:28,885 --> 00:00:31,753 Well, w-while you look, you guys could come stay with me. 15 00:00:31,756 --> 00:00:32,942 Kenneth, that's lovely of you, 16 00:00:32,944 --> 00:00:34,449 - but we really couldn't. - I insist. 17 00:00:34,452 --> 00:00:36,919 I don't have a ton of room, but... it'll be fun. 18 00:00:36,921 --> 00:00:38,487 Yeah, it could be fun. 19 00:00:38,489 --> 00:00:40,185 The six of us under one roof. 20 00:00:40,188 --> 00:00:42,224 Yeah, living, loving, muddling through. 21 00:00:42,226 --> 00:00:44,093 - It'll be like an '80s sitcom. - Hmm. 22 00:00:44,095 --> 00:00:46,962 I can almost hear you and me singing the theme song. 23 00:00:46,965 --> 00:00:50,466 _ 24 00:00:50,468 --> 00:00:53,669 ♪ You don't get the life I lead ♪ 25 00:00:53,671 --> 00:00:56,125 ♪ You don't get my family ♪ 26 00:00:56,128 --> 00:00:58,840 ♪ What we've got ♪ 27 00:00:58,843 --> 00:01:02,077 ♪ Is living proof ♪ 28 00:01:02,079 --> 00:01:03,945 ♪ That under one roof ♪ 29 00:01:03,948 --> 00:01:07,216 ♪ We just needed more of each other ♪ 30 00:01:07,218 --> 00:01:08,584 ♪ Every day ♪ 31 00:01:08,586 --> 00:01:10,386 ♪ And under one roof ♪ 32 00:01:10,388 --> 00:01:13,622 ♪ They think that we're oil and water ♪ 33 00:01:13,624 --> 00:01:15,591 ♪ Let 'em say ♪ 34 00:01:15,593 --> 00:01:17,193 ♪ That it can't be done ♪ 35 00:01:17,195 --> 00:01:18,861 ♪ That life won't be fun ♪ 36 00:01:18,863 --> 00:01:23,195 ♪ They just don't know the truth ♪ 37 00:01:23,198 --> 00:01:27,569 ♪ That six lives get sweeter ♪ 38 00:01:27,572 --> 00:01:29,250 - ♪ Under one... ♪ - Oh, stop it! 39 00:01:29,253 --> 00:01:31,006 - Ugh, get off me. - Oh, would you stop it?! 40 00:01:31,008 --> 00:01:32,808 Stop it! This is torture. 41 00:01:32,810 --> 00:01:34,730 Torture! I can't take it anymore. 42 00:01:37,081 --> 00:01:39,367 ♪ Under one roof ♪ 43 00:01:39,370 --> 00:01:43,312 - Synced and corrected by VitoSilans - -- www.Addic7ed.com -- 44 00:01:43,315 --> 00:01:44,814 Kenneth, we feel terrible. 45 00:01:44,817 --> 00:01:46,617 We never thought we'd be here for a month. 46 00:01:46,620 --> 00:01:50,054 If we had any other place to go, we'd be doing it. 47 00:01:50,057 --> 00:01:52,093 We keep seeing places, but nothing we can afford 48 00:01:52,096 --> 00:01:53,460 that's big enough in the district. 49 00:01:53,463 --> 00:01:54,964 My parents are in a retirement village. 50 00:01:54,966 --> 00:01:58,300 Maya's mom is all over the world for work. 51 00:01:58,302 --> 00:02:00,069 Guys, it's okay. 52 00:02:00,071 --> 00:02:02,721 You don't have to prove that you have no other options. 53 00:02:02,723 --> 00:02:06,358 You could stay here even if you did have other options. 54 00:02:06,360 --> 00:02:09,862 But would you mind proving that Maya's dad isn't an option? 55 00:02:10,772 --> 00:02:12,706 I mean, he... He could help. 56 00:02:12,709 --> 00:02:14,300 No. No. 57 00:02:14,302 --> 00:02:16,046 Maya has not talked to her father 58 00:02:16,049 --> 00:02:18,749 or his awful wife in 20 years. 59 00:02:18,752 --> 00:02:21,195 I am not making you do that. 60 00:02:21,973 --> 00:02:24,642 And so here you'll stay. 61 00:02:24,645 --> 00:02:25,851 Now, if you'll excuse me, 62 00:02:25,854 --> 00:02:28,289 I'll enjoy a little privacy. 63 00:02:31,052 --> 00:02:33,452 [SOBBING] 64 00:02:33,454 --> 00:02:35,078 This isn't working, people. 65 00:02:35,081 --> 00:02:36,622 Kenneth doesn't even go to the bathroom 66 00:02:36,624 --> 00:02:38,046 to hide and cry anymore. 67 00:02:38,049 --> 00:02:39,449 Dylan and I share a couch 68 00:02:39,452 --> 00:02:42,152 and wake up daily in a very troubling embrace. 69 00:02:42,155 --> 00:02:46,140 Okay, I didn't want to say this, but our neighbor Maddie... 70 00:02:46,143 --> 00:02:47,576 She's on my track team. 71 00:02:47,579 --> 00:02:50,513 Her folks said I could stay with them as long as I want. 72 00:02:50,516 --> 00:02:52,416 Wait. You want to separate? 73 00:02:52,419 --> 00:02:54,540 Well, JJ could stay here for a bit. 74 00:02:54,542 --> 00:02:56,242 That wouldn't be so bad. 75 00:02:56,244 --> 00:02:58,710 The airline gives out these hotel vouchers. 76 00:02:58,713 --> 00:03:01,846 I could swipe a couple of those if it's just for us and Ray. 77 00:03:01,849 --> 00:03:03,289 No, my friend's parents 78 00:03:03,292 --> 00:03:05,150 said they'd love to have me stay with them, too. 79 00:03:05,152 --> 00:03:07,419 Who, Ray? What friend? 80 00:03:07,421 --> 00:03:10,022 - Tom. - Ray, please don't make this sadder. 81 00:03:10,024 --> 00:03:12,091 He's real! 82 00:03:12,093 --> 00:03:13,759 Tom! 83 00:03:13,761 --> 00:03:15,210 Tom Thompson. 84 00:03:15,213 --> 00:03:17,046 Move over, Kenneth. I need the cry corner. 85 00:03:17,049 --> 00:03:20,099 No, no, no, no, no. I think we should do it. 86 00:03:20,101 --> 00:03:22,968 It'll just be temporary. 87 00:03:22,970 --> 00:03:24,904 [SIGHING] Oh. 88 00:03:24,906 --> 00:03:27,640 Well, all right, Dylan. I'll call Maddie's mum. 89 00:03:27,642 --> 00:03:30,254 And thank you, Kenneth. It won't be for long. 90 00:03:30,257 --> 00:03:31,911 God. It can't be for long. 91 00:03:31,913 --> 00:03:37,182 ♪ 92 00:03:37,184 --> 00:03:40,219 RAY: Okay, gonna firm things up with Tom's mom. 93 00:03:40,221 --> 00:03:41,253 Mom Thompson. 94 00:03:41,255 --> 00:03:42,821 - Oh. Honestly. - For God sake. 95 00:03:42,823 --> 00:03:46,458 Dylan, while you're at Maddie's, please remember your manners. 96 00:03:46,460 --> 00:03:48,861 Learn your manners. 97 00:03:48,863 --> 00:03:51,063 - Just flush. - I will try. 98 00:03:51,065 --> 00:03:53,365 It's just a few past our house, isn't it? 99 00:03:53,367 --> 00:03:55,534 The white one? 100 00:03:55,536 --> 00:03:58,137 Our house is for sale? 101 00:03:58,139 --> 00:04:00,239 ♪ 102 00:04:00,241 --> 00:04:02,141 Is this a dream? 103 00:04:02,143 --> 00:04:04,156 I don't want to wake up kissing Dylan. 104 00:04:04,159 --> 00:04:05,778 Had not mentioned kissing. 105 00:04:05,780 --> 00:04:07,746 I don't understand. The place was sold. 106 00:04:07,748 --> 00:04:09,748 Oh, yeah. The buyer pulled out. 107 00:04:09,750 --> 00:04:11,550 - Why? - [CHUCKLES] 108 00:04:11,552 --> 00:04:13,710 I assume he... saw it? 109 00:04:13,713 --> 00:04:15,821 - So, it's available again? - Yeah. 110 00:04:15,823 --> 00:04:18,991 You guys in the market for a 1,000-square-foot gas-station toilet bowl? 111 00:04:18,993 --> 00:04:23,095 Oof. When I hear myself talk, I realize I am a bad Realtor. 112 00:04:23,097 --> 00:04:25,264 - We'll take it. - BOTH: What? 113 00:04:25,266 --> 00:04:27,333 - We don't have the money. - Well, my father does. 114 00:04:27,335 --> 00:04:29,435 - Maya, no. - Asking price? 115 00:04:29,437 --> 00:04:32,538 - Do we have a deal? - For this? I mean... 116 00:04:32,540 --> 00:04:33,572 sure. 117 00:04:33,574 --> 00:04:35,841 Great. Right. Daddy, here we come. 118 00:04:35,843 --> 00:04:37,843 The DiMeos are going to London. 119 00:04:37,845 --> 00:04:40,045 Tom, hey. Good news. 120 00:04:40,047 --> 00:04:42,546 Looks like I don't have to crash with you anymore. 121 00:04:42,549 --> 00:04:44,589 - You're a very sad person. - Have some dignity, Ray. 122 00:04:44,591 --> 00:04:46,187 Good job getting these flights, love. 123 00:04:46,190 --> 00:04:47,626 Yeah, that sixth voucher for Kenneth 124 00:04:47,628 --> 00:04:49,898 was kind of a big ask with the guys upstairs. 125 00:04:49,901 --> 00:04:52,132 Yeah, why on Earth did he insist on coming? 126 00:04:52,135 --> 00:04:54,869 Hey, I earned this trip. 127 00:04:54,872 --> 00:04:56,812 You all took over my house for a month. 128 00:04:56,814 --> 00:04:58,881 - Jimmy using my deodorant. - I did not! 129 00:04:58,883 --> 00:05:00,582 [SNIFFS] 130 00:05:00,584 --> 00:05:02,451 Island Spice. Deny it. 131 00:05:02,453 --> 00:05:06,610 ♪ 132 00:05:06,613 --> 00:05:08,824 Look, I know you don't like to travel. 133 00:05:08,826 --> 00:05:11,660 Planes are hard. The airlines always bang up your chair. 134 00:05:11,662 --> 00:05:14,789 But come on. We're going to London! 135 00:05:14,792 --> 00:05:17,266 Just wish we weren't going there to see a guy we've never met 136 00:05:17,269 --> 00:05:19,003 - who doesn't even want us. - MAYA: Nonsense. 137 00:05:19,005 --> 00:05:21,170 - My father doesn't know we're coming. - You didn't call? 138 00:05:21,172 --> 00:05:23,305 I'm sorry. Did the Japanese call first? 139 00:05:23,307 --> 00:05:25,708 "Hey, Pearl Harbor, we're thinking of dropping by. 140 00:05:25,710 --> 00:05:27,289 - How's the 7th?" - JIMMY: Wow. 141 00:05:27,292 --> 00:05:29,792 You'll have to excuse your mother's historical references. 142 00:05:29,795 --> 00:05:31,810 She's processing a lot of emotions 143 00:05:31,813 --> 00:05:33,446 - and hopefully drunk. - Very. 144 00:05:33,449 --> 00:05:34,927 - See? - I just hope we have time for 145 00:05:34,930 --> 00:05:36,318 some culture while we're there. 146 00:05:36,320 --> 00:05:40,289 We're finally away from stupid California, where all we have there is... 147 00:05:40,291 --> 00:05:41,590 [SURFER ACCENT] "Hey, dude. 148 00:05:41,592 --> 00:05:44,953 Oh, gnarly, wave, dude. Hey, can you spot me some guac?" 149 00:05:44,956 --> 00:05:46,695 [BRITISH ACCENT] Are you from California? 150 00:05:46,697 --> 00:05:48,197 I love your accent. 151 00:05:48,199 --> 00:05:49,750 ♪ 152 00:05:49,753 --> 00:05:51,987 I'm totally from Cali. 153 00:05:51,990 --> 00:05:55,124 So, in England, that's, like, exotic and sexy? 154 00:05:55,127 --> 00:05:56,472 Very much so. 155 00:05:56,474 --> 00:05:59,641 Oh, gnarly reframing on this trip, dude. 156 00:05:59,643 --> 00:06:01,110 [CHUCKLES] 157 00:06:01,112 --> 00:06:03,212 ♪ 158 00:06:03,214 --> 00:06:06,215 Excuse me. Uh, do you have any periodicals 159 00:06:06,217 --> 00:06:09,084 about the royal family... The fabulous lifestyles, 160 00:06:09,086 --> 00:06:12,287 the palace intrigue... But, you know, for men? 161 00:06:12,289 --> 00:06:13,836 Sorry, but if I come across anything, 162 00:06:13,839 --> 00:06:15,256 I can bring it to you in your seat. 163 00:06:15,259 --> 00:06:16,625 Oh, no, that's okay. 164 00:06:16,628 --> 00:06:19,093 I'm traveling with a pretty judgmental party. 165 00:06:19,096 --> 00:06:22,064 If they knew that I loved all things royal family... 166 00:06:22,066 --> 00:06:23,365 [GASPS] 167 00:06:23,367 --> 00:06:25,501 Two things... I just tried to flush an apple, 168 00:06:25,503 --> 00:06:27,069 so we're down to one pooper. 169 00:06:27,071 --> 00:06:28,537 Also... 170 00:06:28,539 --> 00:06:30,635 Mom, Dad! Kenneth loves the royals! 171 00:06:30,638 --> 00:06:31,904 - What?! - What?! 172 00:06:31,907 --> 00:06:33,609 - That is so lame! - So lame. 173 00:06:33,611 --> 00:06:35,244 Oh, wait. 174 00:06:35,246 --> 00:06:36,779 I-Is this about Meghan Markle 175 00:06:36,781 --> 00:06:38,580 and the laudable and healing evolution 176 00:06:38,582 --> 00:06:40,249 - of racial sensibilities? - 'Cause that's actually very positive. 177 00:06:40,251 --> 00:06:41,984 - Nothing funny about that. - Laudable. Laudable. 178 00:06:41,986 --> 00:06:43,874 No, it has nothing to do with that. 179 00:06:43,877 --> 00:06:45,787 Oh, good! Ha-ha-ha-ha-ha. 180 00:06:45,790 --> 00:06:47,601 - Lame! - You loser. 181 00:06:47,604 --> 00:06:50,405 [LAUGHS MOCKINGLY] A loser your ass is taking to England. 182 00:06:50,408 --> 00:06:52,219 FLIGHT ATTENDANT: Good morning, ladies and gentlemen. 183 00:06:52,221 --> 00:06:54,746 We've begun our initial descent into London Heathrow. 184 00:06:54,749 --> 00:06:56,498 We'll be landing in 30 minutes. 185 00:06:56,500 --> 00:06:58,333 We're really here. 186 00:06:58,335 --> 00:07:00,269 Oh, I can't bear it. 187 00:07:00,271 --> 00:07:02,577 Now I'm actually gonna have to see my father 188 00:07:02,580 --> 00:07:05,465 and his dreadful, phony wife, with her, "Can I get you something, dear?" 189 00:07:05,468 --> 00:07:08,243 It's like, "Oh, yeah, you want to get me dead, is what you want to get me, innit?" 190 00:07:08,245 --> 00:07:10,163 I just said "innit." Now we're really here. 191 00:07:10,166 --> 00:07:12,681 Okay, so maybe you're not ready to go to your dad's house just yet. 192 00:07:12,683 --> 00:07:14,283 Maybe we take a day to acclimate. 193 00:07:14,285 --> 00:07:15,788 No. 194 00:07:15,791 --> 00:07:17,684 I came here to provide for my family. 195 00:07:17,687 --> 00:07:19,888 I mean, until I've done that, 196 00:07:19,890 --> 00:07:22,457 I really don't believe I could enjoy a single moment. 197 00:07:22,459 --> 00:07:26,109 - ["RULE, BRITANNIA" PLAYS] - Mother England, I am home! 198 00:07:26,112 --> 00:07:27,577 Oh, look at the pubs! 199 00:07:27,580 --> 00:07:29,681 Look at the sun! You can't! 200 00:07:29,684 --> 00:07:33,385 Look at the people! So delightfully pasty-faced. 201 00:07:33,388 --> 00:07:35,637 All right, Fun Dad took care of her. 202 00:07:35,639 --> 00:07:36,805 Time for you. 203 00:07:36,807 --> 00:07:38,179 Okay, hear me out. 204 00:07:38,182 --> 00:07:41,371 That building over there... it's where I first fell in love with London. 205 00:07:41,374 --> 00:07:43,779 That tower... Best views in the city. 206 00:07:43,781 --> 00:07:47,316 You're a filmmaker. How about a great vista? 207 00:07:47,318 --> 00:07:50,385 "That actually sounds cool." 208 00:07:50,387 --> 00:07:53,155 All right. There we go. Let's check it out. 209 00:07:53,157 --> 00:07:54,812 Uh, Central Hall Westminster. 210 00:07:54,815 --> 00:07:56,859 "Stunning views from observation deck. 211 00:07:56,861 --> 00:07:59,862 Wheelchair access... All areas except... 212 00:07:59,864 --> 00:08:01,921 observation deck. 213 00:08:01,924 --> 00:08:05,666 So, screw you, Jimmy DiMeo." Huh. 214 00:08:05,669 --> 00:08:07,603 ♪ 215 00:08:07,605 --> 00:08:10,505 [SURFER ACCENT] And that's a Cali 6.0 earthquake. 216 00:08:10,507 --> 00:08:11,827 You're so cool, Ray. 217 00:08:11,830 --> 00:08:13,763 How come you're dressed this way? 218 00:08:13,766 --> 00:08:16,200 Oh. Awesome story, dude. 219 00:08:16,203 --> 00:08:18,269 I was so wasted when I landed, 220 00:08:18,272 --> 00:08:20,671 - I grabbed the wrong suitcase. - [CHUCKLES] 221 00:08:20,674 --> 00:08:23,806 So, some loser's walking around in your cool clothes. 222 00:08:23,809 --> 00:08:26,210 Meanwhile, this guy's shirt's a ladies' medium. 223 00:08:26,213 --> 00:08:28,390 Probably because he's between boy sizes. 224 00:08:28,393 --> 00:08:29,693 [BOTH LAUGH] 225 00:08:29,696 --> 00:08:32,430 - That guy's so lame! - [LAUGHTER CONTINUES] 226 00:08:32,433 --> 00:08:35,229 ♪ 227 00:08:35,232 --> 00:08:38,700 Okay, that's enough Buckingham Palace for you. 228 00:08:38,702 --> 00:08:41,536 Hold on. I'm working on a plan to meet the Queen. 229 00:08:41,538 --> 00:08:43,572 Queen! 230 00:08:43,574 --> 00:08:45,574 - Come outside! - Come on. 231 00:08:45,576 --> 00:08:47,876 She's not even there. The Union Flag is flying. 232 00:08:47,878 --> 00:08:49,544 It's the Royal Sovereign when she's there. 233 00:08:49,546 --> 00:08:51,647 ♪ 234 00:08:51,649 --> 00:08:54,416 - Hey! Royals lover! - [WHISPERS] Keep it down. 235 00:08:54,418 --> 00:08:57,085 I'm ashamed, okay? I shouldn't like the royals. 236 00:08:57,087 --> 00:08:59,359 They're famous for nothing, they're not American, and... 237 00:08:59,362 --> 00:09:02,297 - Yeah, and you can't get enough of 'em! - They've got ahold on me. 238 00:09:02,300 --> 00:09:04,626 I didn't even set an alarm for Harry's wedding. 239 00:09:04,628 --> 00:09:06,085 My body just knew. 240 00:09:06,088 --> 00:09:07,654 But this can't get out, all right? 241 00:09:07,657 --> 00:09:10,398 I'm 14 years old. My brand is everything. 242 00:09:10,401 --> 00:09:12,100 Okay. My lips are sealed. 243 00:09:12,102 --> 00:09:13,869 - [SIGHS] - But that wedding, though. 244 00:09:13,871 --> 00:09:15,737 Stop it! 245 00:09:15,739 --> 00:09:17,906 It was beautiful. 246 00:09:17,908 --> 00:09:20,108 ♪ 247 00:09:20,110 --> 00:09:23,218 Where were you, and why do you look like that? 248 00:09:23,221 --> 00:09:24,921 Had to look the part, brah. 249 00:09:24,924 --> 00:09:27,549 Luckily, there's a sick PacSun 2 miles away. 250 00:09:27,551 --> 00:09:29,551 My boy Damien hooked me up. 251 00:09:29,553 --> 00:09:30,741 You look ridiculous, 252 00:09:30,744 --> 00:09:32,999 and you're missing everything you came here to see. 253 00:09:33,002 --> 00:09:35,189 You're gonna regret this... brah. 254 00:09:35,192 --> 00:09:38,560 You sound just like Damien! 255 00:09:38,562 --> 00:09:41,531 - This was such a good idea. Thank you. - Oh, please. 256 00:09:41,534 --> 00:09:43,695 It's not like I was in a big rush to see your father. 257 00:09:43,698 --> 00:09:45,598 All his jokes about me being short. 258 00:09:45,601 --> 00:09:47,868 I am average height. He's the freak. 259 00:09:47,871 --> 00:09:49,337 Who wants to be 6'5"? 260 00:09:49,340 --> 00:09:52,007 Buy a special sleeping bag? No, thank you. 261 00:09:52,010 --> 00:09:54,010 ♪ 262 00:09:54,013 --> 00:09:56,380 - You are the perfect height. - Take longer to say it. 263 00:09:56,383 --> 00:09:58,513 Oh, rad. Is that Westminster Abbey? 264 00:09:58,515 --> 00:10:01,516 So, you know any movie stars? 265 00:10:01,518 --> 00:10:03,886 Fiona, I just asked a question. 266 00:10:03,888 --> 00:10:05,554 I'm down to share my SoCal vibes, 267 00:10:05,556 --> 00:10:07,586 but, like, there's got to be a little give-and-take. 268 00:10:07,588 --> 00:10:08,857 Do you go to Venice Beach a lot? 269 00:10:08,859 --> 00:10:11,026 I just answered that! 270 00:10:11,028 --> 00:10:13,965 JIMMY: Fun, right? A day of this, and you'll be ready to talk to your dad. 271 00:10:13,968 --> 00:10:15,531 Oh, God. 272 00:10:15,534 --> 00:10:17,832 Oh, no, we're getting awfully close to his place. 273 00:10:17,835 --> 00:10:20,469 - Ah, it'll be okay. - Hello, stupid bus! 274 00:10:20,471 --> 00:10:22,070 Oh, bloody hell! 275 00:10:22,072 --> 00:10:23,705 Welcome, dull tourists. 276 00:10:23,707 --> 00:10:25,240 - Is that your dad? - Yeah. 277 00:10:25,242 --> 00:10:30,178 Now, your guide today is... ooh, Benjamin. 278 00:10:30,180 --> 00:10:34,650 Oh, you're in for a treat. He's an extra-boring one. 279 00:10:34,652 --> 00:10:36,718 - Morning, Benjamin. - Just ignore him. 280 00:10:36,720 --> 00:10:38,153 Now, movie lovers, 281 00:10:38,155 --> 00:10:41,356 any guess what movie shot at this building? 282 00:10:41,358 --> 00:10:43,781 A sickle and five knuts to the winner. 283 00:10:43,784 --> 00:10:47,229 It's "Harry Potter and the Order of the bloody Phoenix"! 284 00:10:47,231 --> 00:10:48,697 - You know how I know? - If I may... 285 00:10:48,699 --> 00:10:53,835 Because I get to hear this 500 times every day! 286 00:10:53,837 --> 00:10:58,073 I know the script so well, I can throw insults at you 287 00:10:58,075 --> 00:11:02,544 and fit them into Benjamin's insipid narrative perfectly. 288 00:11:02,546 --> 00:11:05,414 - Sirius Black's familial residence... - Black's familial... Die! 289 00:11:05,416 --> 00:11:08,450 BOTH: ...inherited by Harry and used as the headquarters... 290 00:11:08,452 --> 00:11:10,335 Fall off the bus! 291 00:11:10,338 --> 00:11:11,820 - ...of The Order of the Phoenix. - The Phoenix. 292 00:11:11,822 --> 00:11:13,588 Would you shut up?! 293 00:11:13,590 --> 00:11:16,491 Oh, no. 294 00:11:16,493 --> 00:11:18,070 - You?! - "Oh, no, you"? 295 00:11:18,073 --> 00:11:20,027 That's all you have to say after 20 years? 296 00:11:20,030 --> 00:11:22,264 Well, you started it! Didn't she, Benjamin? 297 00:11:22,266 --> 00:11:23,565 What are you doing here? 298 00:11:23,567 --> 00:11:26,001 Actually came to make up with you, you blustering buffoon. 299 00:11:26,003 --> 00:11:28,904 When did you get that dreadful American accent? 300 00:11:28,906 --> 00:11:30,472 What accent? I don't have an accent. 301 00:11:30,474 --> 00:11:32,641 [IMITATING SOUTHERN ACCENT] Well, looky here! 302 00:11:32,643 --> 00:11:37,245 You're madder than a one-eyed fox in a sack 'a honey maggots. 303 00:11:37,247 --> 00:11:39,414 - Yee-hoo! - What the hell is a honey maggot, 304 00:11:39,416 --> 00:11:41,187 you ridiculous old man? 305 00:11:41,190 --> 00:11:43,352 - You're a honey maggot! - No, you're a honey maggot! 306 00:11:43,354 --> 00:11:45,120 You're a honey maggot! 307 00:11:45,122 --> 00:11:47,255 Grand to see you, darling. Off you go. 308 00:11:47,257 --> 00:11:49,257 Benjamin, take her away. 309 00:11:49,259 --> 00:11:51,981 Frustrating the efforts of several Death Eaters... 310 00:11:51,984 --> 00:11:55,464 BOTH: and the evil Voldemort. 311 00:11:55,466 --> 00:11:57,466 Right, just around the corner, 312 00:11:57,468 --> 00:11:59,585 we've a real treat for you. 313 00:11:59,588 --> 00:12:01,944 - [WINDOW CLOSES] - Oh, can you buy us a house? 314 00:12:02,731 --> 00:12:06,173 Ugh! That man... So loud, so dramatic, 315 00:12:06,176 --> 00:12:08,176 holding a grudge for so long! 316 00:12:08,178 --> 00:12:10,312 Have you ever met such a person? 317 00:12:10,315 --> 00:12:11,879 Oh, I can think of one person. 318 00:12:11,882 --> 00:12:14,883 Well, obviously it's me! 319 00:12:14,885 --> 00:12:17,219 He and I are the same. That's the bloody problem. 320 00:12:17,221 --> 00:12:19,488 Well, he knows we're here. Now I'm gonna have to go up, 321 00:12:19,490 --> 00:12:21,456 and he's clearly not pleased to see me. 322 00:12:21,458 --> 00:12:24,659 "Would he be happy to see his grandchildren?" 323 00:12:24,661 --> 00:12:26,261 Where's Dylan? 324 00:12:26,263 --> 00:12:28,764 KENNETH: Your Highness. 325 00:12:28,766 --> 00:12:30,198 - Dylan? - Daddy? 326 00:12:30,200 --> 00:12:33,502 Thank God! He forced me to do this. 327 00:12:33,504 --> 00:12:35,937 I'm not sending anyone up there. The man's a terror. 328 00:12:35,939 --> 00:12:38,607 "If we get the money, can we go back to America?" 329 00:12:38,609 --> 00:12:40,142 - Well, of course you can. - [TIRES SQUEALING] 330 00:12:40,144 --> 00:12:41,143 Oh. 331 00:12:41,145 --> 00:12:42,411 ♪ 332 00:12:42,413 --> 00:12:44,579 - [KNOCK ON DOOR] - She's here! 333 00:12:44,581 --> 00:12:46,481 Fetch the defibrillator, darling. 334 00:12:46,483 --> 00:12:47,716 I'm about to shout myself 335 00:12:47,718 --> 00:12:50,352 into my most worthwhile heart attack yet. 336 00:12:51,288 --> 00:12:53,688 Oh. You're not one awful person. 337 00:12:53,690 --> 00:12:56,158 You're three disappointingly cute ones. 338 00:12:56,160 --> 00:12:58,093 Okay, the kids butter him up, 339 00:12:58,095 --> 00:13:00,554 then I'll go and make up with him, we'll get a check, leave. 340 00:13:00,557 --> 00:13:02,824 - When do you think we should go in? - How dare you?! 341 00:13:02,827 --> 00:13:05,794 - A minute ago? - And if you think you can barge in on me?! 342 00:13:05,797 --> 00:13:07,497 [LAUGHS] We got her. 343 00:13:07,500 --> 00:13:09,570 "Good one, Grandpa." 344 00:13:09,573 --> 00:13:10,672 How fun. 345 00:13:10,674 --> 00:13:13,075 Very quick forming of an alliance. 346 00:13:13,077 --> 00:13:14,804 - Father. - Daughter. 347 00:13:14,807 --> 00:13:16,912 - Frances. - Top of Jimmy's head. 348 00:13:16,914 --> 00:13:18,780 - [WHISPERS] And there it is. - Why don't you come inside, dear? 349 00:13:18,782 --> 00:13:21,817 We're about to have tea. - It begins. 350 00:13:21,819 --> 00:13:23,452 ♪ 351 00:13:23,454 --> 00:13:25,320 So, it's been some time. Uh... 352 00:13:25,322 --> 00:13:28,098 ruin any more weddings since we last met? 353 00:13:28,099 --> 00:13:29,056 A few. 354 00:13:29,059 --> 00:13:31,560 Martin, let's talk of more pleasant things. 355 00:13:31,562 --> 00:13:32,861 Always the voice of reason. 356 00:13:32,863 --> 00:13:34,496 [WHISPERS] You're not fooling anyone. 357 00:13:34,498 --> 00:13:35,964 JIMMY: Maya, you remember 358 00:13:35,966 --> 00:13:38,066 you had something you wanted to say to your father. 359 00:13:38,068 --> 00:13:41,169 Yes, I seem to have rather lost the taste for it. 360 00:13:41,171 --> 00:13:43,171 Like the horse he bought you that you never rode. 361 00:13:43,173 --> 00:13:44,739 How long did we leave you in here? 362 00:13:44,741 --> 00:13:46,441 If you're at a loss for something to say, 363 00:13:46,443 --> 00:13:49,144 perhaps an apology would be a good place to start. 364 00:13:49,146 --> 00:13:50,545 Oh, I agree. 365 00:13:50,547 --> 00:13:54,116 "Maya, I should not have shut you out for the past 20 years. 366 00:13:54,118 --> 00:13:56,451 I am so sorry." Something like that? 367 00:13:56,453 --> 00:13:58,587 Well, perhaps more, uh, 368 00:13:58,589 --> 00:14:01,456 "Dear Father, I'm sorry I turned the happiest day of your life 369 00:14:01,458 --> 00:14:04,159 into a scene, the footage of which somehow made its way 370 00:14:04,161 --> 00:14:08,396 onto a program called 'Britain's Most Embarrassing Weddings, ' 371 00:14:08,398 --> 00:14:10,732 hosted by a since-confirmed pedophile. 372 00:14:10,734 --> 00:14:13,156 Oh, and, uh, sorry for leaving for America 373 00:14:13,159 --> 00:14:16,393 and never looking back." 374 00:14:16,396 --> 00:14:18,540 So... 375 00:14:18,542 --> 00:14:19,841 you missed me? 376 00:14:21,512 --> 00:14:23,445 Well, I mean, if we're going back, 377 00:14:23,447 --> 00:14:25,580 then perhaps... 378 00:14:25,582 --> 00:14:27,883 "Maya, I am sorry 379 00:14:27,885 --> 00:14:29,651 that when I left your mother"... 380 00:14:29,653 --> 00:14:31,553 Which, come on, who bloody wouldn't... 381 00:14:31,555 --> 00:14:36,625 "I also left you, Maya, as well." 382 00:14:36,627 --> 00:14:38,927 Oh, my. 383 00:14:38,929 --> 00:14:42,430 Um... well, um, to that, I would add, uh, 384 00:14:42,432 --> 00:14:45,500 "Daddy, I'm sorry I waited so many years 385 00:14:45,502 --> 00:14:48,203 to tell you that you had hurt me. 386 00:14:48,205 --> 00:14:53,642 It would've explained and changed things so very much." 387 00:14:53,644 --> 00:14:55,179 "Oh, my God. 388 00:14:55,182 --> 00:14:57,549 I'm so sorry, Maya! My little girl." 389 00:14:57,552 --> 00:15:00,715 "I'm sorry, Daddy! I missed you so." 390 00:15:00,717 --> 00:15:03,685 I can't believe they apologized. 391 00:15:03,687 --> 00:15:04,753 Did they? 392 00:15:06,089 --> 00:15:09,424 KENNETH: "We have to go back to the hotel. 393 00:15:09,426 --> 00:15:11,092 My battery is dying." 394 00:15:11,094 --> 00:15:12,694 Whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa. Go back? 395 00:15:12,696 --> 00:15:16,198 There is an outlet right over there. 396 00:15:16,200 --> 00:15:18,366 "But, Dad, the outlets are different over here!" 397 00:15:18,368 --> 00:15:20,835 I have an adapter! 398 00:15:20,837 --> 00:15:22,637 Fun Dad meets Practical Dad? 399 00:15:22,639 --> 00:15:24,606 But one's Marvel and one's D.C. 400 00:15:24,608 --> 00:15:26,208 What?! Come on. 401 00:15:26,210 --> 00:15:30,178 Look, I'm sorry I sold you out back there. 402 00:15:30,180 --> 00:15:31,713 Just let me see what you got. 403 00:15:31,715 --> 00:15:33,738 Hey, don't be sorry to me. Be sorry to you. 404 00:15:33,741 --> 00:15:35,684 You love something, but you're ashamed of it 405 00:15:35,686 --> 00:15:37,192 because of what people might think? 406 00:15:37,195 --> 00:15:39,287 [CHUCKLES] I just don't understand that. 407 00:15:39,289 --> 00:15:41,289 You were hiding the exact same thing 408 00:15:41,291 --> 00:15:43,525 until literally six hours ago. 409 00:15:43,527 --> 00:15:45,527 [JIMMY MUMBLES] 410 00:15:45,529 --> 00:15:47,028 [ELECTRICITY CRACKLES] 411 00:15:47,030 --> 00:15:49,598 ♪ 412 00:15:49,600 --> 00:15:51,233 [SIGHS] 413 00:15:51,235 --> 00:15:53,702 "The voltage is different here. 414 00:15:53,704 --> 00:15:55,971 Fun!" 415 00:15:55,973 --> 00:15:58,073 Ah, actually, this is perfect. 416 00:15:58,075 --> 00:16:01,409 Look where we are. Central Hall Westminster. 417 00:16:01,411 --> 00:16:02,644 [SIGHS] 418 00:16:02,646 --> 00:16:05,480 KENNETH: "A place I definitely can't go." 419 00:16:05,482 --> 00:16:07,716 And you're going, straight to the top. 420 00:16:07,718 --> 00:16:11,786 "No. This is why I don't like to travel. 421 00:16:11,788 --> 00:16:14,189 But it's all fun for you." 422 00:16:14,191 --> 00:16:16,825 Ha! [CHUCKLES] Do you think I'm happy? 423 00:16:16,827 --> 00:16:19,160 We're here because I couldn't save the house. 424 00:16:19,162 --> 00:16:22,464 I couldn't save your mom from having to beg to get it back. 425 00:16:22,466 --> 00:16:27,135 I am trying to make the best of this, and I'm failing. 426 00:16:27,137 --> 00:16:31,006 I need a win. You wanted to go up there. 427 00:16:31,008 --> 00:16:34,009 Let me do this for you, for me. 428 00:16:34,011 --> 00:16:37,746 ♪ 429 00:16:37,748 --> 00:16:39,314 So, JJ... 430 00:16:39,316 --> 00:16:41,416 - he's going to college next year. - Ah. 431 00:16:41,418 --> 00:16:43,251 Ray is a brilliant scholar. 432 00:16:43,253 --> 00:16:45,620 Must've skipped a generation. He gets that from you. 433 00:16:45,622 --> 00:16:48,023 Apparently, you're not bad at this mother thing. 434 00:16:48,025 --> 00:16:51,860 Honestly, Daddy... I'm great at it. 435 00:16:51,862 --> 00:16:55,130 Plus, all the crazy I inherited from you... 436 00:16:55,132 --> 00:16:58,133 With JJ, I get to channel it into something positive. 437 00:16:58,135 --> 00:17:00,068 You think yelling at a bus feels good? 438 00:17:00,070 --> 00:17:02,737 Add "wheelchair" to any complaint, 439 00:17:02,739 --> 00:17:03,872 it's an instant win. 440 00:17:03,874 --> 00:17:05,206 - Pardon me. - Really? 441 00:17:05,208 --> 00:17:07,509 I'll have to ask you, please, not to feed the birds. 442 00:17:07,511 --> 00:17:08,977 How dare you, sir? 443 00:17:08,979 --> 00:17:11,059 I have a grandson who has a wheelchair. 444 00:17:12,816 --> 00:17:15,350 That was intoxicating. 445 00:17:15,352 --> 00:17:16,785 [LAUGHS] 446 00:17:16,787 --> 00:17:18,053 ♪ 447 00:17:18,055 --> 00:17:19,754 WOMAN: Excuse me. 448 00:17:19,756 --> 00:17:22,824 - ["RULE, BRITANNIA" PLAYS] - Oh, that's my royal tracker app. 449 00:17:22,826 --> 00:17:25,593 Lady Rose Gilman is getting froyo in the West End. 450 00:17:25,595 --> 00:17:27,762 She's 33rd in line for succession. 451 00:17:27,764 --> 00:17:29,331 - Come on, man. - But I should... 452 00:17:29,333 --> 00:17:30,699 probably stay here. 453 00:17:30,701 --> 00:17:31,766 Go. 454 00:17:31,768 --> 00:17:34,402 I'll hurt my back if I carry JJ by myself, 455 00:17:34,404 --> 00:17:37,138 but I'll die if I listen to one more word of this. 456 00:17:37,140 --> 00:17:38,973 DYLAN: Yeah, it's so stupid. 457 00:17:38,975 --> 00:17:41,242 I mean, you probably want someone to go make fun of you 458 00:17:41,244 --> 00:17:42,510 while you're there, right? 459 00:17:42,512 --> 00:17:44,045 Yeah, well, I'd love the company 460 00:17:44,047 --> 00:17:46,348 of a woman who's being honest with herself. 461 00:17:46,350 --> 00:17:48,016 Oh, my God. Why are you still here? 462 00:17:48,018 --> 00:17:50,018 Hey, California. 463 00:17:50,020 --> 00:17:52,253 Oh, no. How many are there? 464 00:17:52,255 --> 00:17:53,888 Uh, you're not gonna be stoked. 465 00:17:53,890 --> 00:17:55,169 - I like your necklace. - Me too. 466 00:17:55,171 --> 00:17:57,192 Oi! You slags. We saw him first. 467 00:17:57,194 --> 00:17:58,293 Are you daft? 468 00:17:58,295 --> 00:18:01,029 [SURFER ACCENT] Everybody, just chill out! 469 00:18:01,031 --> 00:18:03,631 [SIGHS] I'm not who you think I am. 470 00:18:03,633 --> 00:18:06,132 I'm not gnarly. 471 00:18:06,236 --> 00:18:09,471 [NORMAL VOICE] I am not gnarly. 472 00:18:09,473 --> 00:18:12,407 I'm Ray, and I want this to stop 473 00:18:12,409 --> 00:18:15,343 so I can visit museums and enunciate consonants. 474 00:18:15,345 --> 00:18:16,611 ♪ 475 00:18:16,613 --> 00:18:18,713 I haven't been true to myself, either. 476 00:18:18,715 --> 00:18:21,049 But unlike Ray, in my case, it's a bad thing. 477 00:18:21,051 --> 00:18:23,043 I don't always like sharing a room with two boys. 478 00:18:23,046 --> 00:18:25,854 A world full of jumping on people, pinning them down, and farting on them. 479 00:18:25,856 --> 00:18:28,056 That's you, only you, every time. 480 00:18:28,058 --> 00:18:31,326 I like things that might not make me seem tough or cool. 481 00:18:31,328 --> 00:18:34,362 And darn it, I love the royals. 482 00:18:34,364 --> 00:18:37,565 Now, if you'll excuse me, I really need to know 483 00:18:37,567 --> 00:18:40,769 what kind of yogurt toppings Lady Rose likes. 484 00:18:40,771 --> 00:18:43,738 And I need to go check the return policy at PacSun. 485 00:18:43,740 --> 00:18:45,585 Good luck, guys. Sorry. 486 00:18:45,588 --> 00:18:48,877 [SIGHS] This is dumb. We should go down. 487 00:18:48,879 --> 00:18:50,912 ♪ 488 00:18:50,914 --> 00:18:52,480 It's gonna take forever with just me. 489 00:18:52,482 --> 00:18:53,726 You'd do that for me? 490 00:18:55,624 --> 00:18:57,095 The first time I saw your face... 491 00:18:57,098 --> 00:18:58,820 - Oh! - Stupid Americans. 492 00:18:58,823 --> 00:18:59,888 Sorry, sorry. 493 00:18:59,890 --> 00:19:02,457 Kenneth! Kenneth! I told them. 494 00:19:02,459 --> 00:19:03,958 I admitted I love the royals. 495 00:19:03,960 --> 00:19:05,827 It felt great. 496 00:19:05,829 --> 00:19:08,897 Ladies, this is Dylan. 497 00:19:08,899 --> 00:19:10,632 - She's one of us. - [SCATTER GREETINGS] 498 00:19:10,634 --> 00:19:12,499 Oh, I, uh... 499 00:19:12,502 --> 00:19:13,701 I got you something. 500 00:19:13,703 --> 00:19:17,639 ♪ 501 00:19:17,641 --> 00:19:19,974 - It's Lady Gilman! - Where? 502 00:19:19,976 --> 00:19:23,711 - Oh. Oh! - Lady Gilman! I love you! 503 00:19:23,713 --> 00:19:25,180 - I love you! - Oh, Lady Gilman! 504 00:19:25,182 --> 00:19:28,016 She looked at me! She just looked at me! 505 00:19:28,018 --> 00:19:31,219 So, you live in California, but where exactly? 506 00:19:31,221 --> 00:19:34,189 Well, it's convenient 507 00:19:34,191 --> 00:19:37,024 that you ask about where we live, bec... 508 00:19:37,027 --> 00:19:38,317 Ooh, Daddy, careful. 509 00:19:38,320 --> 00:19:40,662 Oh! That's nice. 510 00:19:40,664 --> 00:19:43,064 [MUMBLING] I don't know. I can't... 511 00:19:43,066 --> 00:19:45,567 Well, bound to be another one. [CHUCKLES] 512 00:19:45,569 --> 00:19:47,769 I can't believe this feeling. 513 00:19:47,771 --> 00:19:49,804 I feel so at peace. 514 00:19:49,806 --> 00:19:51,339 WOMAN: ...after Albert and... 515 00:19:51,341 --> 00:19:54,576 You are an eyesore and an abomination! 516 00:19:54,578 --> 00:19:58,640 Take the next left and explore the bottom of the Thames! 517 00:19:58,643 --> 00:20:01,281 You see, I always knew we'd see each other again, 518 00:20:01,284 --> 00:20:03,952 but I thought when you came, you'd might, you know, 519 00:20:03,954 --> 00:20:06,688 be asking for help or money, something like that, 520 00:20:06,690 --> 00:20:09,991 but you just came to see me. 521 00:20:09,993 --> 00:20:12,060 Makes a difference. 522 00:20:12,062 --> 00:20:15,730 ♪ 523 00:20:15,732 --> 00:20:19,167 So, tell me about this house of yours. 524 00:20:22,411 --> 00:20:24,738 [GRUNTS] 525 00:20:24,741 --> 00:20:26,441 Whoa. 526 00:20:26,443 --> 00:20:31,012 Oh, yeah. We did it. 527 00:20:31,014 --> 00:20:33,147 "You did." 528 00:20:33,149 --> 00:20:34,549 Eh, yeah. 529 00:20:34,551 --> 00:20:37,051 What'd I say, huh? Best view in the city. 530 00:20:38,989 --> 00:20:41,022 Oh, hey. It's the London Eye. 531 00:20:41,024 --> 00:20:43,057 That wasn't here last time I was. 532 00:20:43,059 --> 00:20:45,410 So, like I said, 533 00:20:45,413 --> 00:20:48,763 it's the best view of that... 534 00:20:48,765 --> 00:20:51,132 completely accessible thing 535 00:20:51,134 --> 00:20:52,800 with a better view. 536 00:20:52,802 --> 00:20:56,109 Why did you let us do this? 537 00:20:56,112 --> 00:21:00,801 - Synced and corrected by VitoSilans - -- www.Addic7ed.com -- 39673

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