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00:00:00,118 --> 00:00:02,273
♪
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00:00:03,132 --> 00:00:05,178
So, that's our show.
Thanks for watching
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00:00:05,203 --> 00:00:07,136
"Murphy in the Morning," and remember,
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00:00:07,161 --> 00:00:08,880
if we can get up this early,
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00:00:08,905 --> 00:00:09,836
so can you.
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♪
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- And we're clear.
- [GROANS, SIGHS]
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00:00:15,650 --> 00:00:17,583
I must've been out of my mind
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00:00:17,615 --> 00:00:19,651
to agree to do another morning show.
10
00:00:19,676 --> 00:00:21,925
My internal clock is so off,
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00:00:21,950 --> 00:00:23,555
I never know what time it is.
12
00:00:23,580 --> 00:00:26,023
You think you're the only one
having trouble adjusting?
13
00:00:26,048 --> 00:00:29,236
I'll never meet a woman
working these crazy hours.
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00:00:29,261 --> 00:00:32,243
You know, Frank, you
should try that dating app
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Silver Singles.
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00:00:33,095 --> 00:00:35,141
I hear that if you swipe left,
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00:00:35,166 --> 00:00:36,521
it means you're not interested,
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00:00:36,560 --> 00:00:37,945
but if you swipe right,
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00:00:37,970 --> 00:00:40,582
it means you can drive after dark.
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00:00:43,036 --> 00:00:45,907
Great show, everyone!
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00:00:47,081 --> 00:00:49,050
Really, Murphy? Pajamas again?
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00:00:49,075 --> 00:00:51,443
Consider yourself lucky, Miles.
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00:00:51,468 --> 00:00:53,828
I heard that in the last
few years of his show,
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00:00:53,853 --> 00:00:55,838
Charlie Rose didn't even wear pants.
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00:00:55,863 --> 00:00:57,418
You know,
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00:00:57,443 --> 00:01:00,163
maybe you should set your
alarm a few minutes early
27
00:01:00,188 --> 00:01:02,125
so you're not in such a
rush in the morning.
28
00:01:02,150 --> 00:01:05,015
I schedule my time so that I can grab
29
00:01:05,040 --> 00:01:07,664
every last possible ounce of sleep.
30
00:01:07,689 --> 00:01:09,302
I brush my teeth in the car,
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00:01:09,327 --> 00:01:12,087
I spit out the window
on Wisconsin Avenue,
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00:01:12,112 --> 00:01:14,067
which was a blue state that turned red,
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00:01:14,092 --> 00:01:15,839
so it's also kind of a statement.
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Guys, guys.
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Quick reminder, with all
these high-tech monitors,
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00:01:22,157 --> 00:01:24,457
you may not always realize
when you're on the air.
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00:01:24,482 --> 00:01:27,913
So, try to keep the open-mouth
yawning to a minimum.
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Frank.
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Why are you singling me out?
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A viewer tweeted this
screenshot at 7:30 a.m.
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00:01:39,558 --> 00:01:41,848
You should really be
brushing your tongue, Frank.
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00:01:43,687 --> 00:01:44,966
Look at the bright side.
43
00:01:44,991 --> 00:01:46,500
Your social-media presence has expanded
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00:01:46,525 --> 00:01:47,810
across all platforms.
45
00:01:47,835 --> 00:01:49,921
Just a matter of time before
you can monetize that.
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Really? How much we talking about?
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Enough to keep you from stealing
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00:01:53,371 --> 00:01:55,866
those little boxes of
cereal from the break room.
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00:01:56,126 --> 00:01:57,475
You know, I didn't say
anything when you took
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00:01:57,500 --> 00:01:58,934
that case of printer paper
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00:01:58,959 --> 00:02:00,697
or the batteries out of the remotes.
52
00:02:01,528 --> 00:02:03,766
But touch my Froot Loops,
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00:02:04,192 --> 00:02:05,834
and you and I have a problem.
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00:02:08,785 --> 00:02:10,352
I don't know if I like that kid.
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Get used to him. Without Pat,
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none of this works.
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00:02:15,153 --> 00:02:17,498
And he showed me how to block
my parents on Facebook.
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So, who's up for Phil's? My treat.
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00:02:21,539 --> 00:02:24,073
What's the occasion? No occasion.
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00:02:24,098 --> 00:02:26,613
I'm just thrilled that we're
all back together again,
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00:02:27,008 --> 00:02:29,695
and I love my new condo
at the Watergate.
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Though the other day,
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I misplaced my keys and had to...
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00:02:33,771 --> 00:02:35,028
break in.
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Come on.
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Oh, guys, I'll be with
you in two minutes.
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- I just have some copy changes
- [ELEVATOR BELL DINGS]
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00:02:45,033 --> 00:02:46,187
to make for tomorrow.
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00:02:46,212 --> 00:02:48,515
[TELEPHONE RINGS]
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[SLURRING] Ms. Brown,
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I'm Addie Abrams, your new assistant.
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H-How did I know you
were going to say that?
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00:03:05,648 --> 00:03:09,083
And do I detect the unmistakable aroma
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00:03:09,108 --> 00:03:11,006
of last night's tequila?
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00:03:12,167 --> 00:03:15,598
You just got a call from a guy named...
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00:03:15,964 --> 00:03:17,975
Arnie. Ernie. Andy?
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00:03:18,000 --> 00:03:20,006
His voice was super loud.
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00:03:20,031 --> 00:03:21,864
I think he'll call back.
79
00:03:24,333 --> 00:03:26,922
Also, there was another call
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00:03:27,057 --> 00:03:28,657
from a woman...
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00:03:28,682 --> 00:03:30,765
about a thing...
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- from a country.
- Oh.
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It's big.
84
00:03:34,900 --> 00:03:36,742
They're into sauerkraut.
85
00:03:38,235 --> 00:03:40,001
Germany?!
86
00:03:40,026 --> 00:03:42,862
Angela Merkel returned my call?
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That's it.
88
00:03:44,469 --> 00:03:47,095
I'm gonna need you to
be a little quieter.
89
00:03:48,008 --> 00:03:50,406
- [COUGHS]
- Oh!
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00:03:50,664 --> 00:03:53,140
No. False alarm.
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00:03:54,024 --> 00:03:55,936
Anyone got any gum?
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♪
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PHYLLIS: So, Miguel Gonzales,
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00:04:03,486 --> 00:04:06,277
you are interested in the
exciting, fast-paced world
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00:04:06,302 --> 00:04:07,876
of the restaurant business.
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00:04:07,900 --> 00:04:09,297
You know how to put out a grease fire?
97
00:04:09,322 --> 00:04:11,489
[LAUGHS] My parents run a food truck,
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00:04:11,514 --> 00:04:13,546
so believe me, I've seen it all.
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00:04:13,571 --> 00:04:15,250
And I see you're in college.
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00:04:15,275 --> 00:04:17,819
You kids, you love your
beer pong and toga parties.
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00:04:17,844 --> 00:04:20,120
How do I know you'll show up for work?
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00:04:20,145 --> 00:04:21,908
I need the money.
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00:04:22,273 --> 00:04:24,208
I have a scholarship,
but [CLICKS TONGUE]
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00:04:24,233 --> 00:04:25,566
it doesn't cover everything.
105
00:04:25,591 --> 00:04:28,024
I still have to pay for
things like books, meals,
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00:04:28,049 --> 00:04:29,680
the border wall.
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00:04:29,896 --> 00:04:32,541
Oh, great, so you guys
are gonna pay for that?
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00:04:34,419 --> 00:04:37,558
Not that I want it. I just
don't want to pay for it.
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00:04:38,094 --> 00:04:40,004
We'll climb over it anyway.
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00:04:40,421 --> 00:04:42,532
But not me 'cause I'm DACA.
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00:04:42,557 --> 00:04:44,716
So, you're a Dreamer? Me too...
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00:04:44,741 --> 00:04:46,608
as in I never dreamed
I'd be doing this.
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00:04:47,957 --> 00:04:50,046
What, talking to a Mexican?
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00:04:52,179 --> 00:04:54,282
No. Running a restaurant.
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00:04:54,307 --> 00:04:56,607
I inherited this place
from my late brother.
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As it turns out, I'm not a
natural behind the bar.
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00:04:59,572 --> 00:05:01,385
People sit down and unload.
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00:05:01,410 --> 00:05:03,878
They got fired, their
mistress got a lawyer,
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00:05:03,903 --> 00:05:07,211
they're under indictment for
collusion with a foreign government.
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00:05:09,362 --> 00:05:10,661
Please.
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00:05:10,835 --> 00:05:12,783
I have my own problems.
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00:05:13,235 --> 00:05:14,434
I can tell.
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00:05:14,459 --> 00:05:15,926
Your ketchups are unmarried.
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00:05:15,968 --> 00:05:16,974
What?
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00:05:17,513 --> 00:05:19,913
Your ketchup bottles,
they're half-empty.
126
00:05:19,938 --> 00:05:22,219
But if you marry them at
night when you close up...
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00:05:24,720 --> 00:05:26,687
next day, it's like you
have brand-new botles.
128
00:05:26,712 --> 00:05:28,912
So, you put them together every night?
129
00:05:28,955 --> 00:05:30,919
'Cause I was married four
times, and that's not really
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00:05:30,944 --> 00:05:33,589
a fair representation of what happens.
131
00:05:34,629 --> 00:05:36,814
[POUNDING ON DOOR]
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00:05:36,839 --> 00:05:39,449
This better not be the
health inspector.
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00:05:41,270 --> 00:05:42,869
We're closed! Come back at 11:00.
134
00:05:42,894 --> 00:05:44,178
- Hey, Phyllis!
- Hey, hey, hey!
135
00:05:44,203 --> 00:05:45,697
For crying out loud,
136
00:05:45,722 --> 00:05:47,481
LeBron would have an easier time
137
00:05:47,506 --> 00:05:49,408
getting into Mar-a-Lago.
138
00:05:49,511 --> 00:05:51,180
- We're starving.
- Come on.
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00:05:51,205 --> 00:05:54,290
Fine, fine, but you have to take
your own chairs off the tables,
140
00:05:54,315 --> 00:05:57,109
and, uh, you might have
to marry some ketchups.
141
00:05:57,595 --> 00:05:59,665
It's not as fun as it sounds.
142
00:05:59,796 --> 00:06:00,944
All right, look alive.
143
00:06:00,969 --> 00:06:02,991
Those dishes aren't
gonna wash themselves.
144
00:06:03,016 --> 00:06:04,822
They haven't in the
last four days, anyway.
145
00:06:05,945 --> 00:06:07,995
Thanks. You won't regret this.
146
00:06:09,412 --> 00:06:10,612
Phyllis.
147
00:06:10,637 --> 00:06:12,870
How's the shrimp gumbo?
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00:06:12,895 --> 00:06:14,547
Tastes a lot like the burger.
149
00:06:15,464 --> 00:06:16,984
Looks a lot like it, too.
150
00:06:17,009 --> 00:06:18,994
- [KNOCK ON DOOR]
- MURPHY: Oh, my God,
151
00:06:19,019 --> 00:06:20,705
the nerve of some people.
152
00:06:20,730 --> 00:06:23,310
- Don't they know you're closed?
- [DOOR OPENS]
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00:06:23,335 --> 00:06:25,462
I'm gonna start adding a cover charge.
154
00:06:25,487 --> 00:06:27,262
[CHUCKLES] Hi, Phyllis.
155
00:06:27,287 --> 00:06:29,047
- There you are.
- ALL: Hey!
156
00:06:29,072 --> 00:06:30,562
Well, look who it is...
157
00:06:30,587 --> 00:06:32,396
Our morning-show competition.
158
00:06:32,421 --> 00:06:34,440
You can sit with us,
but just this once.
159
00:06:34,465 --> 00:06:36,165
Yeah, we don't usually
mingle with people
160
00:06:36,190 --> 00:06:38,421
- from The Wolf Network.
- [CHUCKLES]
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00:06:38,446 --> 00:06:40,123
Especially when their
ratings are getting
162
00:06:40,148 --> 00:06:43,070
- a little too close to ours.
- [CHUCKLES]
163
00:06:43,168 --> 00:06:45,755
It seems like just yesterday
I was changing your diaper.
164
00:06:45,780 --> 00:06:47,031
Well, in a few years, Uncle Frank,
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00:06:47,056 --> 00:06:49,504
I'll be happy to return the favor.
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00:06:52,051 --> 00:06:53,310
- Dude.
- Dude.
167
00:06:53,335 --> 00:06:55,319
- Dude!
- Hey!
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00:06:55,344 --> 00:06:57,563
So, how's everything going?
169
00:06:57,588 --> 00:06:59,879
How are things over at
the old Wolf Network,
170
00:06:59,904 --> 00:07:00,953
or as I like to call it,
171
00:07:00,978 --> 00:07:03,130
the Ministry of Propaganda?
172
00:07:03,980 --> 00:07:05,925
Yes, everything is
just fine, thank you.
173
00:07:05,950 --> 00:07:08,621
They're still playing nice
with their token liberal,
174
00:07:08,646 --> 00:07:10,992
but get this... so, as
I've been doing my show,
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00:07:11,017 --> 00:07:12,350
I've been all over the country
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00:07:12,375 --> 00:07:14,516
and I've gotten a real
earful from a lot of people
177
00:07:14,541 --> 00:07:16,937
about a bunch of topics,
and I started thinking,
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00:07:16,962 --> 00:07:18,398
"Why shouldn't the average American
179
00:07:18,423 --> 00:07:19,598
be able to be represented
180
00:07:19,623 --> 00:07:21,022
in the White House
Press Briefing room?"
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00:07:21,047 --> 00:07:23,847
So, I pitched the idea to Wolf,
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00:07:23,872 --> 00:07:25,905
and they gave me their seat at
tomorrow's press conference.
183
00:07:25,930 --> 00:07:27,230
- No, they didn't.
- So great!
184
00:07:27,255 --> 00:07:29,578
- You're kidding!
- Oh, my gosh.
185
00:07:30,919 --> 00:07:33,792
Try to contain your excitement, Mother.
186
00:07:33,817 --> 00:07:35,543
I am excited for you.
187
00:07:35,568 --> 00:07:38,885
I... This is a huge
step in your career.
188
00:07:39,124 --> 00:07:42,392
It's just that with this
particular White House,
189
00:07:42,417 --> 00:07:45,554
press briefings are a
colossal waste of time.
190
00:07:45,579 --> 00:07:46,859
Mm.
191
00:07:46,884 --> 00:07:48,005
You sure you're not saying that because
192
00:07:48,030 --> 00:07:50,626
you've been banned
from the White House?
193
00:07:50,911 --> 00:07:52,081
Again?
194
00:07:52,106 --> 00:07:54,360
For getting into a Twitter
war with the president.
195
00:07:54,385 --> 00:07:58,237
It was a series of verbal skirmishes...
196
00:07:58,865 --> 00:08:00,293
which I won.
197
00:08:00,318 --> 00:08:01,642
[LAUGHS]
198
00:08:01,667 --> 00:08:04,556
You can joke about it,
but we're a new show,
199
00:08:04,581 --> 00:08:06,010
and we are at a real disadvantage
200
00:08:06,035 --> 00:08:07,835
not having a presence
in that briefing room.
201
00:08:07,860 --> 00:08:09,159
It hurts our credibility.
202
00:08:09,184 --> 00:08:11,307
Miles, there's no point
in going over this.
203
00:08:11,332 --> 00:08:13,434
She's never gonna get
back into that room.
204
00:08:13,459 --> 00:08:15,319
Hey, if I wanted to, I could.
205
00:08:15,344 --> 00:08:16,142
Oh, good luck with that.
206
00:08:16,167 --> 00:08:17,727
I hear they're selling
"wanted" posters of you
207
00:08:17,752 --> 00:08:19,030
in the White House gift shop.
208
00:08:19,055 --> 00:08:20,255
[CHUCKLES]
209
00:08:20,280 --> 00:08:21,900
You know, if I did get back in there,
210
00:08:21,925 --> 00:08:23,085
I would ask a question
211
00:08:23,110 --> 00:08:25,689
that would blow the
roof off that place.
212
00:08:25,714 --> 00:08:27,429
Easy to say when you can't get
213
00:08:27,454 --> 00:08:29,056
under the roof to ask it.
214
00:08:29,081 --> 00:08:31,837
So, Avery, what is this
question you're gonna ask
215
00:08:31,862 --> 00:08:33,356
tomorrow at the White House?
216
00:08:33,381 --> 00:08:34,365
Well, the number-one issue
217
00:08:34,390 --> 00:08:35,352
for most of the people
that I've talked to
218
00:08:35,377 --> 00:08:36,834
is the cost of healthcare,
219
00:08:36,859 --> 00:08:38,677
so I'm gonna ask what
the government is doing
220
00:08:38,702 --> 00:08:40,947
to bring down prices
of prescription drugs.
221
00:08:40,972 --> 00:08:43,245
That's an excellent question,
222
00:08:43,270 --> 00:08:44,980
but do you think you're going to get
223
00:08:45,005 --> 00:08:48,015
"the government" to give
you a straight answer?
224
00:08:48,273 --> 00:08:50,357
And how do you know
Sarah Huckabee Sanders
225
00:08:50,382 --> 00:08:52,089
will even call on you?
226
00:08:52,114 --> 00:08:53,581
Oh, she'll call on me.
227
00:08:59,279 --> 00:09:01,646
What is that weird twinkle thing
228
00:09:01,671 --> 00:09:04,033
you're doing with your eye?
229
00:09:04,058 --> 00:09:06,462
I just ran into her a lot
on the campaign trail,
230
00:09:06,487 --> 00:09:09,118
and we developed a
kind of, uh, rapport.
231
00:09:09,143 --> 00:09:10,486
[GASPS]
232
00:09:10,511 --> 00:09:13,544
Are you saying she has a crush on you?
233
00:09:13,569 --> 00:09:15,384
I'm not saying anything.
234
00:09:15,409 --> 00:09:18,010
But she did call me last night
to tell me she likes my show.
235
00:09:18,035 --> 00:09:20,634
- Sarah?!
- Huckabee Sanders?!
236
00:09:22,845 --> 00:09:24,705
Do you know what room she called from?
237
00:09:26,622 --> 00:09:28,401
D-Did you hear any ambient sound?
238
00:09:29,375 --> 00:09:30,608
Splashing water,
239
00:09:30,633 --> 00:09:32,242
sound of a loofah
240
00:09:32,732 --> 00:09:35,042
gently exfoliating a comely shoulder?
241
00:09:38,751 --> 00:09:40,400
Oh, my God, Miles,
242
00:09:40,425 --> 00:09:43,726
are you fantasizing about
Sarah Huckabee Sanders?
243
00:09:45,151 --> 00:09:46,450
[QUIETLY] Occasionally.
244
00:09:47,809 --> 00:09:50,310
I have a thing for domineering women.
245
00:09:50,335 --> 00:09:52,068
It started with my
Hebrew school teacher,
246
00:09:52,093 --> 00:09:53,210
Estelle Fink.
247
00:09:53,235 --> 00:09:56,588
She had a smokey eye and a
sneer I found arousing at 13.
248
00:10:02,106 --> 00:10:03,606
I-I've said too much.
249
00:10:04,493 --> 00:10:06,026
AVERY: Okay.
250
00:10:06,051 --> 00:10:08,179
Well, I just stopped
by to share the news.
251
00:10:08,204 --> 00:10:10,611
Mom, you can tune into
the briefing tomorrow
252
00:10:10,636 --> 00:10:12,662
at the White House and live
through me vicariously.
253
00:10:12,687 --> 00:10:14,118
- Ha, ha.
- I'll see you, guys.
254
00:10:14,143 --> 00:10:15,319
- All right.
- Way to go, Avery.
255
00:10:15,344 --> 00:10:17,029
- Thanks.
- Good luck, buddy.
256
00:10:17,991 --> 00:10:19,891
- [DOOR CLOSES]
- I could get back into that room
257
00:10:19,916 --> 00:10:21,516
if I wanted to. I know people.
258
00:10:21,541 --> 00:10:23,314
It wouldn't be that hard.
259
00:10:23,339 --> 00:10:25,711
White House Communications Office?
260
00:10:25,736 --> 00:10:29,069
Hi, this is Murphy Brown
calling for Don Fitzgerald.
261
00:10:29,340 --> 00:10:31,672
Yes, of course he knows me.
262
00:10:31,697 --> 00:10:34,165
I need to renew my press credentials.
263
00:10:36,058 --> 00:10:38,214
Well, when was he fired?
264
00:10:40,582 --> 00:10:43,916
Okay, then transfer me to Denise West.
265
00:10:44,585 --> 00:10:46,009
She quit?
266
00:10:48,032 --> 00:10:51,214
Okay, uh, can you try Clark Prescott?
267
00:10:52,275 --> 00:10:55,022
In a shallow grave?
268
00:10:56,527 --> 00:10:58,461
Well, how long do you think you have?
269
00:10:58,486 --> 00:11:00,152
♪
270
00:11:04,845 --> 00:11:09,057
This wig is working out
really well, Murphy.
271
00:11:09,082 --> 00:11:10,763
I got it from my cousin Jesse.
272
00:11:10,788 --> 00:11:12,239
He owns a mortuary.
273
00:11:14,475 --> 00:11:16,867
It'd be a sin to bury a good wig.
274
00:11:17,881 --> 00:11:20,601
I thought I smelled formaldehyde.
275
00:11:21,061 --> 00:11:23,385
It's called Cadaver No. 5.
276
00:11:24,026 --> 00:11:25,225
Okay.
277
00:11:25,250 --> 00:11:27,402
Let's go over this one more time.
278
00:11:27,634 --> 00:11:29,932
The briefing starts at 3:00 p.m.
279
00:11:29,957 --> 00:11:31,300
on the dot.
280
00:11:31,325 --> 00:11:34,436
At 2:45, Murphy approaches
the West Wing guard house
281
00:11:34,461 --> 00:11:35,888
with the forged credentials.
282
00:11:35,913 --> 00:11:38,570
The guard on duty is...?
283
00:11:38,985 --> 00:11:40,703
- Roy.
- No.
284
00:11:40,728 --> 00:11:41,877
It's Cliff.
285
00:11:41,902 --> 00:11:42,795
Cliff!
286
00:11:42,820 --> 00:11:45,247
- Where did you get Roy?
- Who knows?
287
00:11:45,658 --> 00:11:48,626
Once you've got Cliff all softened up,
288
00:11:48,667 --> 00:11:50,633
you flash your fake credentials
289
00:11:50,658 --> 00:11:51,924
and you're on your way.
290
00:11:51,949 --> 00:11:53,983
We're all on our way...
291
00:11:55,203 --> 00:11:56,475
to hell.
292
00:11:57,331 --> 00:12:00,098
I can't believe you talked
me into doing this!
293
00:12:00,381 --> 00:12:03,504
Trespassing on White House
grounds is a felony!
294
00:12:03,529 --> 00:12:06,104
What kind of executive producer am I?!
295
00:12:06,686 --> 00:12:09,553
The small, sweaty kind who
makes everybody nervous.
296
00:12:10,252 --> 00:12:12,067
Okay.
297
00:12:12,656 --> 00:12:14,388
All clear outside.
298
00:12:14,413 --> 00:12:16,183
Oh, wow.
299
00:12:16,352 --> 00:12:18,027
I envy you, Murph.
300
00:12:18,052 --> 00:12:20,279
There is nothing I love
more than going undercover.
301
00:12:20,304 --> 00:12:21,746
I wish I could put on a dress
302
00:12:21,771 --> 00:12:23,751
and sneak into that briefing room now.
303
00:12:23,776 --> 00:12:24,942
You could, Frank.
304
00:12:24,967 --> 00:12:26,773
You're still shaving your legs, right?
305
00:12:27,167 --> 00:12:29,794
Because I swim!
306
00:12:31,140 --> 00:12:33,277
Just when everything in my
life was going so well,
307
00:12:33,302 --> 00:12:35,822
now we're all gonna get
arrested and thrown in jail.
308
00:12:35,909 --> 00:12:37,870
I'll be tried, sentenced,
put behind bars.
309
00:12:37,895 --> 00:12:40,798
Next thing you know, I'm
Bernie Madoff's bitch!
310
00:12:42,617 --> 00:12:43,872
Okay, I've got it...
311
00:12:43,897 --> 00:12:45,753
Murphy's fake press credentials.
312
00:12:46,034 --> 00:12:47,905
This is so cool!
313
00:12:47,930 --> 00:12:49,497
I mean, if this van comes with a futon
314
00:12:49,522 --> 00:12:50,539
and a month's supply of ramen,
315
00:12:50,564 --> 00:12:53,342
I'm giving my six
roommates notice tonight.
316
00:12:53,577 --> 00:12:55,179
Here you go.
317
00:12:55,796 --> 00:12:57,968
Okay, so I'm going undercover
318
00:12:57,993 --> 00:13:00,295
as a reporter for...
319
00:13:00,480 --> 00:13:03,630
Le Monde, and my name is...
320
00:13:04,710 --> 00:13:07,250
Cosette Peugeot?
321
00:13:07,404 --> 00:13:09,111
I knew you spoke French, so...
322
00:13:09,136 --> 00:13:10,769
Cosette, Frank?
323
00:13:10,794 --> 00:13:12,827
Where did I get my journalism degree?
324
00:13:12,852 --> 00:13:16,114
The Jean Valjean Academy
of Stolen Bread?
325
00:13:16,139 --> 00:13:17,453
And "Peugeot"?!
326
00:13:17,478 --> 00:13:19,103
I don't know a lot of French words!
327
00:13:19,128 --> 00:13:20,780
You should be glad I
came up with "Peugeot."
328
00:13:20,805 --> 00:13:23,210
You were almost "Cosette Le Pew."
329
00:13:23,414 --> 00:13:25,158
Time to go, Murphy.
330
00:13:25,300 --> 00:13:27,667
If you run into trouble,
we're right here.
331
00:13:27,692 --> 00:13:29,388
And remember... you're fully wired,
332
00:13:29,413 --> 00:13:30,879
so we'll be able to hear everything.
333
00:13:30,904 --> 00:13:33,014
Including trapped gas, full disclosure.
334
00:13:34,940 --> 00:13:36,597
Go with God, Cosette.
335
00:13:37,714 --> 00:13:39,046
Au revoir.
336
00:13:41,555 --> 00:13:43,857
MURPHY: I'm coming up
to the guard house.
337
00:13:44,334 --> 00:13:46,237
I don't see anybody inside.
338
00:13:46,262 --> 00:13:47,728
- Are you serious?
- Wait.
339
00:13:47,753 --> 00:13:49,586
There's a note on the window.
340
00:13:49,611 --> 00:13:51,263
It says...
341
00:13:51,320 --> 00:13:53,400
"Back in five"?!
342
00:13:54,465 --> 00:13:56,431
It's no time for jokes, Murphy!
343
00:13:56,456 --> 00:13:58,056
I'm not joking!
344
00:13:58,081 --> 00:13:59,296
Oh, my God!
345
00:13:59,321 --> 00:14:01,248
What is it? Is everything okay?
346
00:14:01,273 --> 00:14:02,963
The gate's open.
347
00:14:03,881 --> 00:14:05,659
Open? What do you mean "open"?
348
00:14:05,684 --> 00:14:08,836
I mean the opposite of closed, Miles.
349
00:14:08,861 --> 00:14:12,193
No guard, and the gate is open.
350
00:14:13,426 --> 00:14:16,041
This country is so screwed.
351
00:14:16,066 --> 00:14:18,360
♪
352
00:14:20,591 --> 00:14:24,814
♪
353
00:14:24,839 --> 00:14:27,241
Okay, I'm right outside
the briefing room.
354
00:14:28,268 --> 00:14:30,007
Bonjour, monsieur.
355
00:14:30,032 --> 00:14:32,542
J'espere que cette arme
n'est pas chargee.
356
00:14:35,100 --> 00:14:38,185
All right, it's au revoir, Cosette.
357
00:14:42,482 --> 00:14:44,816
SARAH: As I've said
repeatedly on legal matters
358
00:14:44,841 --> 00:14:46,653
dealing with the Meuller investigation,
359
00:14:46,678 --> 00:14:49,179
I refer you to the
president's outside counsel.
360
00:14:49,204 --> 00:14:50,374
Next question.
361
00:14:50,399 --> 00:14:52,144
[REPORTERS SHOUTING]
362
00:14:52,169 --> 00:14:54,775
I see we have some new
faces here today.
363
00:14:54,800 --> 00:14:57,149
Avery, I look forward to
taking your question,
364
00:14:57,174 --> 00:14:59,863
but, uh, I think I'll
save the best for last.
365
00:14:59,973 --> 00:15:02,106
Welcome.
366
00:15:03,610 --> 00:15:06,887
- Next question.
- [REPORTERS SHOUTING]
367
00:15:06,912 --> 00:15:08,651
Fred.
368
00:15:10,878 --> 00:15:12,865
Thanks for taking my question.
369
00:15:12,890 --> 00:15:15,205
[QUIETLY] You've got to be kidding me.
370
00:15:15,515 --> 00:15:17,274
SARAH: A-Actually, I said "Fred."
371
00:15:17,299 --> 00:15:19,589
[CHUCKLES] That's so weird.
I heard "Murphy."
372
00:15:20,517 --> 00:15:22,371
Uh, I don't know how you got in here,
373
00:15:22,396 --> 00:15:23,886
but it's inappropriate.
374
00:15:23,911 --> 00:15:25,597
- [REPORTERS SHOUTING]
- April.
375
00:15:25,622 --> 00:15:26,636
Excuse me.
376
00:15:26,661 --> 00:15:29,847
If you really want to talk
about what's inappropriate,
377
00:15:29,872 --> 00:15:31,947
how about the way you do your job?
378
00:15:32,259 --> 00:15:34,644
- Uh-oh.
- Game on.
379
00:15:34,669 --> 00:15:37,770
The role of the White
House Press Secretary
380
00:15:37,795 --> 00:15:40,425
is to create transparency
in the government
381
00:15:40,450 --> 00:15:42,964
and tell the American people the truth,
382
00:15:42,989 --> 00:15:45,316
but that's not what
happens in this room.
383
00:15:45,341 --> 00:15:47,956
Whether it's about a meeting
with Russians in Trump Tower
384
00:15:47,981 --> 00:15:51,297
or a made-up mandate
that requires separation
385
00:15:51,322 --> 00:15:54,206
between parents and their
children at the border,
386
00:15:54,231 --> 00:15:55,901
it all comes down to the same thing,
387
00:15:55,926 --> 00:15:57,826
so here's my question...
388
00:15:57,851 --> 00:15:59,335
Why do you lie?
389
00:15:59,360 --> 00:16:02,127
[REPORTERS GASPING]
390
00:16:02,323 --> 00:16:04,744
I think that's an absolutely
ridiculous question.
391
00:16:04,769 --> 00:16:06,583
- Wow.
- She used the "L" word.
392
00:16:06,608 --> 00:16:08,980
MURPHY: Excuse me. And
how demoralizing is it
393
00:16:09,005 --> 00:16:12,635
for us to be called the
enemy of the people?
394
00:16:12,660 --> 00:16:15,212
I mean, how do we go
back to our newspapers
395
00:16:15,237 --> 00:16:18,401
and our magazines and our
networks knowing that
396
00:16:18,426 --> 00:16:22,139
the most basic principle of
journalistic integrity...
397
00:16:22,164 --> 00:16:23,886
To report the facts...
398
00:16:23,911 --> 00:16:25,870
Is totally out of reach?
399
00:16:25,895 --> 00:16:28,362
If we can't get to the truth,
400
00:16:28,387 --> 00:16:30,716
why are we even here?
401
00:16:32,280 --> 00:16:36,745
I say we get up and walk out right now.
402
00:16:36,770 --> 00:16:38,569
Let's show this administration
403
00:16:38,594 --> 00:16:40,855
we're not gonna take it anymore.
404
00:16:40,880 --> 00:16:42,696
Come on, let's go!
405
00:16:49,030 --> 00:16:51,307
Look, I know a lot of
what I've said here
406
00:16:51,332 --> 00:16:53,534
has to resonate with you.
407
00:16:53,574 --> 00:16:55,274
I know a lot of you...
408
00:16:56,623 --> 00:16:58,498
personally.
409
00:16:59,503 --> 00:17:01,483
Some better than others.
410
00:17:03,296 --> 00:17:06,089
Maybe I don't know you as
well as I thought I did.
411
00:17:07,440 --> 00:17:10,491
[CAMERA SHUTTERS CLICKING]
412
00:17:13,430 --> 00:17:15,029
♪
413
00:17:15,054 --> 00:17:17,564
[GRUNTS]
414
00:17:17,589 --> 00:17:20,464
[STERNLY] Well, well, well.
415
00:17:20,489 --> 00:17:24,314
You are "well, well" -ing me?
416
00:17:24,339 --> 00:17:27,047
[SCOFFS] If anyone's earned the right
417
00:17:27,072 --> 00:17:28,972
to "well, well" today, I have.
418
00:17:28,997 --> 00:17:31,061
I am the well-weller.
419
00:17:32,120 --> 00:17:35,288
Of all the days to crash
the White House...
420
00:17:35,313 --> 00:17:36,175
[BAG THUDS]
421
00:17:36,200 --> 00:17:39,161
you pick my first press briefing?
422
00:17:39,448 --> 00:17:41,008
- Way to go, Mom.
- Don't worry.
423
00:17:41,033 --> 00:17:43,636
There'll be others. No,
that's not the point.
424
00:17:43,661 --> 00:17:44,971
I didn't get to ask my question.
425
00:17:44,996 --> 00:17:48,001
After you left, she pretty
much shut the party down.
426
00:17:48,026 --> 00:17:50,324
You know, when you get
an idea in your head,
427
00:17:50,349 --> 00:17:52,369
you get so obsessed
428
00:17:52,394 --> 00:17:55,089
that you become blind
to everything else...
429
00:17:55,114 --> 00:17:57,292
Logic, common sense,
430
00:17:57,332 --> 00:17:58,901
maternal instinct...
431
00:17:58,926 --> 00:18:00,175
Out the window.
432
00:18:00,208 --> 00:18:03,087
Somebody had to say what
everyone was thinking.
433
00:18:03,112 --> 00:18:04,879
- You should've cheered me on...
- [SIGHS]
434
00:18:04,904 --> 00:18:07,684
but you left me hanging
there with the rest of them,
435
00:18:07,709 --> 00:18:09,803
the rest that I didn't potty train.
436
00:18:09,828 --> 00:18:12,600
What was I supposed to do?!
437
00:18:12,625 --> 00:18:15,784
Hitch up my short pants and
grab my mommy's apron strings?
438
00:18:15,809 --> 00:18:18,074
You should have backed me up.
439
00:18:18,099 --> 00:18:19,604
You're my son.
440
00:18:19,629 --> 00:18:21,028
You know,
441
00:18:21,053 --> 00:18:22,386
it wasn't always easy
442
00:18:22,411 --> 00:18:25,378
growing up in the shadow
of the great Murphy Brown.
443
00:18:25,403 --> 00:18:27,916
I need to forge my own way.
444
00:18:27,941 --> 00:18:30,308
When I am in that press
room, I am not your kid.
445
00:18:30,333 --> 00:18:32,467
I am a reporter. I am
there to do a job...
446
00:18:32,492 --> 00:18:34,831
To fight the good fight.
447
00:18:34,856 --> 00:18:36,489
You know, a lot of those
reporters in there
448
00:18:36,514 --> 00:18:38,448
probably agreed with you today.
449
00:18:38,473 --> 00:18:40,299
Hell, I agreed with you,
450
00:18:40,324 --> 00:18:42,776
but if we all stormed out in protest,
451
00:18:42,801 --> 00:18:44,538
what would we be left with?
452
00:18:44,655 --> 00:18:46,621
The ones who drank the Kool-Aid
453
00:18:46,646 --> 00:18:49,315
and the president's
unhinged Twitter feed.
454
00:18:50,611 --> 00:18:51,743
[SIGHS]
455
00:18:51,768 --> 00:18:55,127
"Journalists are the only real firewall
456
00:18:55,152 --> 00:18:57,346
between power-hungry politicians
457
00:18:57,371 --> 00:19:00,238
and the people they're
elected to serve."
458
00:19:00,263 --> 00:19:01,985
Someone told me that once.
459
00:19:02,472 --> 00:19:04,139
Yeah, who?
460
00:19:06,869 --> 00:19:09,866
Oh, I don't know. Some French gal.
461
00:19:12,997 --> 00:19:14,924
I want to say...
462
00:19:14,949 --> 00:19:16,432
Culotte?
463
00:19:17,748 --> 00:19:19,281
"Culotte" is a French word
464
00:19:19,306 --> 00:19:21,733
that means "really ugly pants."
465
00:19:24,756 --> 00:19:26,643
[SIGHS]
466
00:19:26,668 --> 00:19:28,877
Maybe you were right not to
follow me out that door,
467
00:19:28,902 --> 00:19:30,783
and maybe... [CLEARS THROAT]
468
00:19:30,808 --> 00:19:33,456
I-I don't say this
very often, but...
469
00:19:35,663 --> 00:19:37,408
I-I'm sorry.
470
00:19:39,865 --> 00:19:41,192
Pardon?
471
00:19:42,026 --> 00:19:44,202
You're going to make me say it again?
472
00:19:44,227 --> 00:19:47,112
Just want to save it for posterity.
473
00:19:49,137 --> 00:19:50,570
Fine.
474
00:19:50,595 --> 00:19:52,163
I'm sorry.
475
00:19:52,473 --> 00:19:55,002
Sounded even better the second time.
476
00:19:55,940 --> 00:19:57,702
Scooch.
477
00:19:57,921 --> 00:19:59,471
[BUTTONS CLICKING]
478
00:19:59,505 --> 00:20:01,158
MURPHY: [CHUCKLES] Last
time you ran away,
479
00:20:01,183 --> 00:20:04,540
all you took was a Harry Potter
lunch box full of Go-Gurt.
480
00:20:06,120 --> 00:20:07,370
I'm not running away.
481
00:20:07,395 --> 00:20:09,096
I've got a flight at 5:00 a.m.
tomorrow.
482
00:20:09,121 --> 00:20:11,664
I'm doing a remote to talk
to farmers about tariffs.
483
00:20:11,689 --> 00:20:13,012
What, you really thought
I was moving out?
484
00:20:13,037 --> 00:20:14,382
No!
485
00:20:14,407 --> 00:20:17,772
No. [CHUCKLING] I mean,
you'd be crazy to.
486
00:20:17,797 --> 00:20:19,440
Where else would you
find such cheap rent?
487
00:20:19,465 --> 00:20:21,932
[LAUGHS]
488
00:20:22,100 --> 00:20:23,800
Good night, Mom.
489
00:20:26,015 --> 00:20:29,040
MURPHY'S VOICE: I'm sorry.
I'm sorry. I'm sorry.
490
00:20:29,065 --> 00:20:31,914
I'm sorry. I'm sorry. I'm sorry.
491
00:20:31,939 --> 00:20:34,961
I'm sorry. I'm sorry. I'm sorry.
492
00:20:34,986 --> 00:20:36,918
I'm sorry. I'm sorry.
493
00:20:36,943 --> 00:20:38,296
How do you like my new ringtone?
494
00:20:38,321 --> 00:20:41,190
I'm sorry. I'm sorry. I'm sorry.
495
00:20:41,276 --> 00:20:42,991
I'm sorry. I'm...
496
00:20:43,016 --> 00:20:44,536
Hi, Sarah.
497
00:20:44,866 --> 00:20:51,137
♪
498
00:20:53,153 --> 00:21:04,138
- Synced and corrected by martythecrazy -
- www.addic7ed.com -
35775
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