All language subtitles for The Tick s01e10 Pineapple Pokopo.eng

[Alarm buzzing]

[Sign buzzing]

[Man] Elapse orbital uration,
78 hours,

14 minutes, 30 secons
an counting.

Subject vital signs:

Bloo pressure, normal.
Heart rate an respiration, goo.

Brain wave pattern, A-OL.

It's feeing time.

[Hooting]

[Man 1] Activate automatic
foo paste ispensal unit.

[Man 2] Roger, FPDU is a go.

[Man 1] Affirmative.
We are blowing paste.

[Hooting]

He's eating it.
We have paste own.

[Hooting]

[Man 1] We are approaching
cosmic ray storm.

Initiate emergency evasive...
Oops, spille my coffee.

[Man 2] Hey! Get some paper towels!

I mean, eploy absorption panels.

[Man 1] Roger on the paing.
We're seeing progress.

- [Man 2] That's coming out.
- [Man 1] Thank you, Houston.

Looks like we're out of the woos
on that coffee stain.

[Controls beeping]

[Man 1 clears throat] Uh, Houston,
how's that monkey oing up there?

Oh, man.

- [Man 1] Houston, was that you?
- [Man 3] We in't copy that.

Copy this, you jerks.
Get me down out of here!

[Man 1] Uh, Houston,
that was the monkey.

[Man 3] Roger, central tracking.
We have talking monkey,

an brain waves inicate super-genius.

- [Man 1] Uh-oh.
- You clowns.

Why do you guys shoot monkeys
into space? It's been done to death.

[Man 3] Well, Yank, we just wante to
see what monkeys were like in space.

Oh, yeah? I'll save you time. I'll tell
you what monkeys are like in space.

- Very angry!
- [Man 3] We're sorry, little buy.

That storm blew out our remote guiance
system. Can't get you own without it.

Aw, forget it.
I'll get myself down, you dinks.

[Echoing] But I'll see you again!

[Snoring]

- [Door closes]
- [Footsteps approach]

[Mumbling over raio]

- Good morning, Arthur.
- Who are you?

What are you doing
in my apartment?

[Tick yawning]

If you guys are selling insurance,
we don't want any.

No, Tick, we're with the government.

Well, no, thanks. We've got
all the government we need.

We're secret agents
here on official business.

Pack a small bag.
Your flight leaves in three hours.

- Uh, OK.
- What?

[Agent] This is Yank. Until 0800 hours,
he was a normal monkey in space.

Due to massive ray exposure, he
possesses the highest IQ on the planet.

We want him to head our space program.
He's that good. Here's the problem.

Slide show, boring.

- Losing consciousness.
- [Thudding]

[Agent] He's about
to splash down here.

Near the small island nation of
Pokoponesia. This is Pineapple Pokopo.

International troublemaker and ugly
customer. He rules with an iron fist.

We're certain he
will grab our monkey.

- Tick.
- Grab the monkey, got it.

Our government can't enter
Pokopo's waters

without an international incident.
That's where you come in, gentlemen.

But why us?

You were recommended
by a patriotic hero.

[Woman] Hi, boys.

[Tick and Arthur] American Maid?

She's the third member of your team.

Here, you get two-way wrist radios.

Oh, smooth!

Where is everybody?
Where is my boat?

That's it! You're
in a lot of trouble, Houston!

This is abandonment!
This is mental anguish!

[Laughing] Great, great.

Don't think this isn't
gonna appear in my deposition.

Hey, get out of here! Hey!

Hey, that's government property.
Don't eat me! I'm smart!

[Footsteps approaching]

Little monkey.

Welcome to Pineapple Pokopo's
island domain.

You, Yank, will be
our guest for the next...

Uh, sorry, what is a monkey's
average life span?

20 to 40 years.
What's it to you?

Our guest for
the next 20 to 40 years.

[Yank] What? Where's your phone?

You will become Pokoponesia's
first chief military advisor.

I've had my eye on Hawaii for quite
some time, and that's where you come in.

You will build me some kind of
fantastic, genius technology machine

that will allow me to enslave Hawaii
and rule it with an iron fist.

Something with neutrons.
What do you think?

Hmm, come here. No, no, come here.
Back off, fruit-face!

Ah, yes, I expected you
might respond this way.

So I prepared a little speech.

[Clears throat]

I am not a smart man.

I am not an honest man.
I am not a clean man.

I am not a rational man, but...

...I am a very big man.

You are a very smart monkey.

But you are
a very, very small monkey.

Big man, small monkey.

- Get it?
- Got it.

[Tick imitates radio static]
Arthur, come in.

[Static] Repeat, come in, Arth...
I mean, Arnie.

- [Static] Over.
- Tick, cut it out.

Eh... [static] Arthur,
you're gonna blow my cover.

My code name is Nick.

I don't know you.

If you're going
to be that way about it.

- Tick!
- Nick.

Nick, we're not supposed
to know each other.

We're supposed to be
three separate tourists

enjoying a carefree island holiday.

But what about our secret mission?

Yes! That's the whole point.
It's a secret, so quit talking about it.

Stop spitting into your wrist radio,

or I swear I'll bust it
over your head.

Excuse me, I don't know
either of you gentlemen,

but I can't help but noticing...
that you're screwing everything up!

[Clears throat]

Would anyone care
for some complimentary tap water?

Oh, great. Great!

Could I have a fresh pillow?
This one's a little flat.

Could I have another one
of those salty peanuts?

Ooh, ooh! And my lips are a little dry.
Could I have some balm?

[Man] This is your captain speaking.

I've turne on
the "fasten seatbelt" sign.

Please make sure your seatbelts
are securely fastene

an that your seats are
in an upright position.

May I remin you that in
the likely event of a water laning,

the seat cushions beneath you
are the property of Pineapple Air

an may not be
remove from the cabin.

[Clears throat] An thank you
for choosing Pineapple Air.

- [Bell rings]
- Welcome to the Royal Pineapple Hotel.

- Name?
- Janine.

Very good. And the last name?

Oh, last name... uh... Smith.

[Static] Hey, no one told me we had
to think up last names. Over. [static]

- [Man] And you, sir?
- [Stutters] Arnie...

...uh... Jones.
- Very good.

- Sir?
- Oh, uh...

Nick, uh...

[muttering]

Nick Soapdish.

Uh-huh. Nick Soapdish.

Uh, yes. It's French.

That's funny. It sounds
more made-up to me.

[Chuckles] Well, time to hit the surf.

- Welcome to the...
- [Pokopo] I can't believe it.

Tourists have finally
come to Pokoponesia.

My ads in those travel magazines
are really starting to pay off.

Oh... and pretty too.

Whoa! Oh, hey!

Oh! Whoa!

Oh, oh! Down, boy.

Whoa! Whoa! Whoa-ho-ho!

How's the water, Mr. Soapdish?

Oh, you know, it's a little sharky.

But, it's OK
once you get used to it.

[Pokopo laughing]

At last, Pokoponesia's
becoming the new tourist hot spot.

Armpit of the Pacific, indeed.

But, General Pokopo,

something tells me those tourists
are secret agents from America.

Nonsense, they're just
plain folks out for a good time.

It's our job to give it to them.

We just have to find out
what they want.

I think they want the monkey.

And I think you
are not listening to me.

What we need here
is a little market research.

[Screams] General Pokopo, no!

Now, you get back to the hotel
and invite that pretty one up here.

We'll have dinner and find out

what she's looking for
in an island paradise.

Oh, and, little monkey,

how's that fantastic,
genius, technology machine coming?

I'm just itching to conquer Hawaii.

Oh, yeah. We'll have that island chain
on it's knees in no time.

Good, good. [chuckling]

Come in. Nick, Arnie.

All right. [static] This is
Secret Agent Nick, over. [static]

Listen, we've got to put together
a plan. What do we know so far?

Well, Pokopo stays
in a fortified palace

just off the north shore
of the island.

Yes, and it's surrounded by deadly
riptides and shark-infested waters.

- Nick, what did you get?
- [Static]

Well, I found some very pretty shells,
and I got this lovely lei. [static]

Watch it.
Someone's coming.

Janine Smith.

His Excellency, General Pokopo,

cordially invites you
to his palace for dinner.

Followed by a one-woman focus group
on tourism in Pokoponesia.

- It's free.
- Great.

I'll be there.

What a break!

You boys work your way
out to the palace.

I'll call when I find Yank.

[Welding]

How is my genius machine
coming along, little monkey?

- It'll be ready by tonight.
- Tonight, really?

Excellent, but tell me,
how does it work?

Well, you just aim it at Hawaii
and pull the trigger.

Ahh. Good work.

And after we've secured Honolulu,
we'll reload and conquer Wyoming.

Yeah, you know, Poke,

as your chief prisoner
and military advisor,

I feel I should inform you
that your logic is flawed.

You see, you're succumbing
to the fallacy of the unbounded middle.

- Wow, really?
- Oh, yeah, absolutely.

But what is this unbounded middle
you speak of, oh, genius monkey mine?

It's, well, you know... Oh...

On the ends it's...

And then it's creamy, but...

[stutters] I used to know, but
somehow... [hoots] I can't remember.

[Static] Come in, Secret Agent Arnie.

This is Secret Agent Nick.
[Static] Over.

Yeah, yeah. This is Arnie.
Where are you, Nick?

[Static] I'm in position
and prepared to embark.

Are you in position
and prepared to embark? [static]

[Arthur] Tick... I mean, Nick,

woul you give me a few minutes?
It's a jungle out here.

[Nick imitates static] That's
a big 10-4. Agent Nick, out. [static]

[Arthur] Ow. Ugh...

Well, Miss Smith,
my general philosophy is this:

Whether you're oppressing people
or running a resort,

you go with your strengths.

In America, you've got your
Grand Canyon, your Mount Rushmore.

In France, you've got
your Eiffel Tower.

And what exactly are
Pokoponesia's strengths, general?

Well, we got two things, basically.

We've got pineapples,
and we've got sharks.

Go with the pineapples.

[Yank thinking]
Yank's journal, last entry.

Oh, woe to the wick that withers
in the brief, bright canle of my min.

Earlier, when I was talking
to that big ape, Pokopo,

I coul feel it begin to happen.

Base on my calculations, the effects
of the cosmic ray storm on my brain

will wear off
in only a few short hours.

In... in other wors...

[hooting]

...I'm gonna be real umb, real soon.

[Static] Arnie, Arnie! Come in.
[Static] Ar...

Oh, come on, Arthur. Come in.

I won't spit
in the raio anymore, I promise.

[Arthur groans]

I think this sightseer
has seen enough sights for today.

Enough for a lifetime.

- [Both laughing]
- [Groaning] Huh?

Arthur, do you read me?
Are you OK?

Help! I told you, I'm a tourist. Help!

I'm gonna tell
my travel agent about this.

Yeah, right, Mr. Tourist. The only
thing you're going to be saying is,

"Ow, ow, there's
a shark biting my leg."

[Laughing] "Ow, ow."

Hey, you jerks!
Let that tourist go!

What? No!

Ee-hee-hee.

Contact.

[Both screaming]

- Ow.
- [Groaning]

Arthur!

[Whirring]

Oh! [groaning, whining]

"Let him go"?
How could you say "let him go"?

I didn't mean it in that sense.

Oh, forget it.

Now, listen, we've got to get out to the
fortress before they can warn Pokopo.

All right, then.
Let's hang ten for justice.

So, Janine...
Uh, may I call you Janine?

If I were to enslave
the population of, say, Hawaii

and rule it with an iron fist,

would that be a place
you might enjoy vacationing?

[Clears throat] You've got a little,
uh, pineapple on your face.

[Yank hooting]

[Pokopo] I'd like you meet Yank,

my pet monkey
and chief military advisor.

- [Spits]
- Oh. [laughs] He's actually very smart.

- Say something smart, Yank.
- [Phone rings]

Please excuse me, Janine.

Yank, I'm not really Janine Smith.

I'm American Maid. I'm a superhero.
I've been sent to get you out of here.

I think I should tell you,
I'm not the genius monkey I used to be.

[Hooting]

That's not the point.
My job is to get you back to America.

They want you to head
the space program.

Well, it's their money.
[Laughs, hoots]

Hello? Oh, why, no.
It's going wonderfully.

Why should? What?

I'm telling you, we just had a fight
with the other two in the jungle.

They're secret agents,
and they're heading your way.

Then they all must be secret agents.

Oh, this is so sad.

Now I have to feed
Janine to the sharks.

And we've still never had a tourist.

[Surf music]

Well, well, Janine Smith.
Where were we?

Oh, yes. Pokoponesia's strong points.

I trust you've enjoyed
our delicious pineapples.

Uh-oh.

Now, I think it's time
for you to sample our sharks.

[Hooting]

[Grunts]

Well, Miss Smith,
you played a little joke on me.

Now I have a little joke for you.

You'll never get away
with this, Pokopo.

How can you tell
if a shark likes you? [laughs]

He takes another bite. [laughing]

A little Pokoponesian humor.

[Alarm buzzing]

Ah, your friends must be arriving.

But I think we have
enough sharks to go around.

- [Laughs]
- [Computer beeps]

Uh-oh!

[Tick] Egad!

[Grunting]

Let me go!

Get back, you!

Yank! Throw me
that mooring line so I can...

- Yank!
- [Hoots] Fading fast.

Listen, the machine
I built for Pokopo,

it's not a weapon.

Yank, the mooring line?

[Hooting]

It's an escape pod.

[Screeching]

Great.

[Laughing]

- That was pretty good.
- You're not kidding.

Now put me down.

Come on. Yank built us
an escape pod.

Ooh, good monkey.

[Hoots]

[Groans]

No!

This is it.

[Man] Do you, Yank,
swear to fulfill your uties

an obligations as irector
of the National Space Program?

[Hooting]

Uh, let's put that own as a yes.

Someone get the irector a banana.

You know, gang,
when you're a superhero,

you never know
where the day will take you.

You may find yourself
halfway around the world

in the shark-infested waters
of true-to-life living.

Or you may find yourself
going down to the store for a lozenge.

You can't know, can you?

No. You got to ride that wave.

You got to suck that lozenge.

'Cause if you don't, who will?

Where do you get this stuff?

Where, indeed.

Repair and Synchronization by
Easy Subtitles Synchronizer 1.0.0.0