All language subtitles for People Just Do Nothing Big in Japan (2021)

And you're locked in to
the sounds of the legendary...

- Yeah.
- Kurupt FM.

Hold tight.
The phone line crew inside, yeah?

Phone line number
to get you through, once again,

is 07050-030-108.9!

Kurupt FM was one of
the biggest pirate radio stations

in the whole of Brentford, yeah?

- Like...
- It was the only one in Brentford.

It was the only one in Brentford, that's
what I mean, SO it was the biggest.

- So Th-that's... Yeah.
- No, just...

Hold tight. The drive time massive.
All the sexy ladies round town.

Sexy ladies!

What made Kurupt FM different
is we always played the same songs.

Not a lot of DJs do that.
And that's a confidence thing.

I'll start doing...

Decoy.

We was the first generation
to be like, "Enough of the guitars."

- Do you know what I mean?
- Yeah.

Enough of that fucking weird singing.
Pick up a mic, get some decks

- and do some real music.
- Yeah.

- Do you know what I mean?
- Golden era.

You're looking
at '01 to '04, golden era, like.

- Do you know what I mean?
- And when did music get shit? 2005.

Exactly.

♪ B stands for brutality

- ♪ I said E
- ♪ e stands for the energy

- ♪ I said A
- ♪ A stands for Audi

- ♪ I said T - ♪ Audi TT

- ♪ T - ♪ Guaranteed

- ♪ T - ♪ Riding the beat

♪ T

♪ T

And was it the right time
to end Kurupt?

Looking back at it, probably.

Did we want to drag it on?

Well, yes, if I could.

I dragged it On for years.
Do you know what I mean?

It's lovely, innit?

Iconic blocks, you know what I mean?

We were legends within our own right.
DO you know what I mean?

- Self-proclaimed.
- Exactly.

- What, I'm a legend as well?
- Oh, God, yeah. Yeah, yeah.

If anything, one day,
the music industry will wake up

and realize that Kurupt FM
was the biggest mistake they ever made.

Facts only.

Funny to think
that this all used to be mine.

Yeah, man.

Madness.

- Oh, shit.
- So why are you living in a van?

One doesn't choose to live in a van.

Uh, life deals you a set of cards,
and they're all jokers.

As you can see,
I've got everything I need here.

Uh, got the shirts.

If I've got a business meeting,
no problem.

Uh, just put that on there.

Hello, mate. Uh, businessman.

You know, ready for business.
Uh, got towel.

I wouldn't, uh, touch that right now.

Have I made a lot of money
managing Kurupt FM?

Yes and no.

Actually, just no.

But recently, let's just say
I've been on the phone

to a record label in Japan, mate.

Lovely.

Apparently, their music is being used

on a TV show out there.

So it's great to have
a second opportunity, a second shot.

And I will be the best manager
they've ever had in their lives.

GRINDAH, GRINDAH...

Where are you?

Wait till I find him, mate.

He's gonna absolutely shit his arse
when he hears the news.

Oh, I think I see him.

GRINDAH!

GRINDAH! GRINDAH!

- Oh, mate.
- Fuck are you doing here?

- What are you doing?
- Mate.

Don't film this. Don't film this.

- What is this?
- Japan called me back.

They called me back.
We're gonna get a record deal.

- Like an actual record deal?
- Yes, mate!

Your song is being used on the telly.

They're actually flying us out,
definitely?

Yes, mate. It's happening.

- That's fucking cool, man.
- Yeah. Yeah.

All right, then.

Check this, then, yeah?

Fuck the system, bruv.

Man quits, like. You get me, yeah?

This what I fucking think
of Your Majesty and that, yeah?

Fuck them, yeah? Man quits, like.

Hey, you just gonna leave that there?
So you've got...

Well, yeah, I'm above that now.

You said we're definitely going,
we definitely got a deal, yeah?

Yeah, I think so.

- You think so?
- I'm like 80% sure.

- Oh, for fuck's sake.
- Sorry.

I might just finish this round, then,
just make sure I get

- this month's pay...
- Yeah, that's smart.

But then after that,
I'll definitely quit, right?

Yeah.

There it is, Our world-famous track
that Japan's absolutely obsessed with.

♪ Bang, lyrical blow to the jaw

♪ Bang, lyrical blow
to the jaw, bang...

Oh, mate. That is mad.

Me and Beats, the main ones.

My best mate Beats alongside.

Yeah. That's DJ Decoy.

He don't really say much,
but he made the track.

Steves. They probably think Steve's
disabled, though, looking at it.

But check this. Bare comments.

Most of it's in Japanese.
I can't even fucking read it.

And it... "Bang."
It says "bang" as well.

There are quite a few "bangs." Wow.

They're quoting my lyrics in Japan!

Hey, Tony! You're gonna be a star, mate!

Yeah.

You'll be delivering your own bloody
royalty checks to yourself soon.

No, I won't be doing this anymore.
That's the point.

Oh, yeah, yeah.

BEATS, OVER PA:
This is a colleague announcement.

Charnice, please take your break.

Charnice, please take your break.
Thank you.

I'd recognize that MC voice anywhere.

- Shh, shh, shh, shh.
- Oh.

- Beats, you piece of shit!
- Fucking hell.

Yes, bruv.

- How you doing?
- What're you doing here?

Uh, well, got some big news, ain't I?

- I've already told Kevin.
- I wanted to tell him.

- We're definitely going, yeah?
- We're going, mate.

- It's happening, mate. Sold the van.
- Ha-ha! Sick!

- I sold the van. He's quit his job.
- I've quit my job.

- Wow, fucking hell. That's mad!
- Hey, we're doing it.

- Kevin.
- We're doing it.

- It's happening.
- It's happening.

Kevin, Kevin. Did you call Jeff, yeah?

- My son slash boss.
- I'm not your son.

Well, stepson, but same smoky eyes,

so people assume I'm his dad,
which I love.

- Can you just get back to work?
- Uh, I'm a proud dad, Craig.

Craig, what do you think of
your dad's record deal?

Yeah, just get Off me
and just go finish your shift, yeah?

Fine.

- Yeah.
- That's mad.

- Mad, innit?
- Yeah.

Ah, bruv.

When the music industry come knocking
at your door, like, you drop everything.

Yeah, yeah, you rush to that door
and you Open it.

- And guess who's standing there.
- Who?

- Tiny little three-foot Japanese fella.
- NO, he's not tiny.

- It's a massive record label.
- A lot of them are.

Yeah, well, and it's a massive
record label and he's saying,

"Oh, I want to sign you lot.
I want to take your lot track,

put it on a TV show
and fly you out to Japan immediately."

Yeah, and we say, "Yeah, definitely",

as long as you lot
pay for flights and hotels."

- Oh, God, yeah. Yeah.
- Yeah.

- They agreed?
- Yeah.

- Yeah.
- What did you say?

- I said, "Yeah."
- Yeah.

I just want to thank everyone

for the past year and a half
of working with me.

I've had the greatest time.

Wilf, Charnice,

- thank you for all your support.
- Kevin, Kevin. Get off. Get off.

And Kurupt FM are taking over Japan!

- Anyway, see you in a bit, mate.
- Nice One, Kevin.

- Angel!
- What?

Angel, come help Daddy fold his
clothes. You know he struggles.

Got it. Great.

- What are you doing?
- Just trying to fit everything in.

They're gonna get all creased
and you'll be upset.

Angel! We got a plane to catch!

What's the first thing
you guys are gonna do in Japan?

- Uh, what are we gonna do, babe?
- Uh, right...

- Get some good pictures, basically.
- Oh, yeah.

We're just gonna, like, take in the
culture by getting selfies everywhere.

- Beats, you still there?
- Yeah, still here, mate.

- Is Roche there?
- Did that stop...

Can I see her?
I haven't seen her for ages. Let me see.

- I thought I could hear her.
- Hi.

Is Roche coming to Japan as well?

- NO.
- Oh, that's sad.

It's not sad. Not everyone wants to go.

- Look, babe...
- My talent alone

has taken my whole family
to the best city in the world.

Japan.

Who's that? Robyn? Hello!

Hello! It's Uncle Tony!

It's Uncle Tony!

Hello!

- Oh, she's hiding.
- She's hiding from you.

- Yeah, she's a bit scared.
- She's not scared.

- Bubby...
- It's Uncle Tony! Hello!

Right.

Yeah, record labels
don't normally fly managers out,

so I've had to sell the Merc.

To four different people.

Whoever gets here first can have it.

I'll be long gone by then.

Gonna miss the Merc.

- Is it actually a Merc?
- Yeah.

Bon voyage.

Right, I'm good to go.

So what have you got there?

So we got uppers, downers, uh,
ones to help you sleep.

These ones wake you up.

Um, those are good for anxiety,
which is good

'cause pretty much
all of these create anxiety.

Um... yeah.

Now just got to get it all up my arse
and we're good to go.

Yeah, Japan sounds sick and everything,

but, uh, apparently they've got
a massive drugs problem over there.

Um, you can't get drugs anywhere.

All packed for Japan.

So that's something that I'm having
to take into consideration.

- Do you not have a door?
- Huh?

Are you filming?

Here you go, airport.

Do you know where
the Japan entrance is?

- Over there, mate.
- Oh, that way.

Yeah.

Yeah, once the condoms ran out,
I just started getting sandwich bags.

A bit bigger,
but you can sort of fold them into...

Just... They still slid in all right,
to be honest.

That's not Kurupt FM, is it?

Oh. Kurupt FM is back.

Oh!

♪ Back like we never left
Colder than...

- ♪ Everest - Yes!

- Coldest mountain in the sea.
- Yeah.

Okay, guys,
I've got the boarding passes.

- You did there?
- I've printed them out.

- Okay.
- Oh, sick, guys.

- Did you do something to your hair?
- NO.

Um, okay, Deeky, that's for you.

- Anthony Zogra...
- Zografos.

Yeah, okay.

Don't touch it. Don't touch it.
Steven Green.

There we go. Kevin Bates.

- There you go. Good to go.
- Yes.

- Uh, last but not least...
- Yeah, yeah.

Oh, Lady Miche.
Sorry, uh, I didn't know...

I didn't know that you were coming.

- Are you joking?
- They only paid for the boys.

They haven't even paid for me.
I had to pay for myself.

Why the fuck didn't you tell me earlier?

- Yeah.
- Well, I don't know.

I thought they were just coming
to wave us off, friendly.

What?

Uh... So, sorry to butt in,

but we are cutting into
the very valuable duty-free time.

I know you're excited about duty-free,
though.

Tell you what, I can hustle it.
I will negotiate,

and I'll say he needs
his hair and makeup team.

- We'll fly you out.
- Yes.

- Okay, thanks, yeah.
- Yes, duty-free!

- We'll see you in a bit, yeah?
- Yeah.

- What even is duty-free?
- It's this place,

apparently, where they've got
massive Toblerones

- and big packs of fags and that.
- You're joking. Toblerones.

- And you look after Mummy as well.
- Decoy, come On!

- Yeah.
- Yeah? All right.

- Decoy! Get in!
- I'm just saying bye.

Taking ages
with weird emotional goodbyes.

- I'll see you guys later, yeah?
- Bye-bye. We'll see you.

Grindah's trying Toblerone.
We're gonna watch.

- Come on, hurry up.
- Sorry.

- Love you!
- Uh, yeah, same!

- Yeah.
- Bye!

- Hello, mate.
- Hi.

- MC GRINDAH.
- Beg your pardon?

This is... No.

And where are you traveling to
today?

Tokyo. Uh...

We just got signed to a music...
You know the... yeah.

Sir. Sir.

Oh, mate. Big risk, big risk.
But you know what?

This is what entrepreneurs do.
We take risks, you know?

I mean, look at me, yeah?

I came to this country in '95

with nothing but five pound
and my brother's passport. My passport.

My passport.

Where you traveling to today?

- Japan.
- Japan?

- And what are you doing over there?
- Nothing.

- Nothing?
- Uh... business. Sorry.

- Okay.
- Yeah?

Good to go.

- Oh, thank God.
- Thanks.

Have you told anyone about Japan?

Not really.

I've told literally
all my followers.

NO One cares
about your Instagram.

So glamorous, isn't it?

This is mad.

- Breathe in.
- Seat four, yeah.

- Sorry. Watch.
- Um...

Can you just chuck that in there?

It's salty.

Got about 20 Toblerones in that bag.

- Give that to Decoy.
- We're on our second block.

Mmm, mmm.

Oh, hard.

Oh.

Ah, sorry about that.

Oh, fuck.

Not this again.

How do you get off?

Oh, God.

- Deeky, guess what.
- What?

I've only gone and done it, haven't I?

What have you done?

I've joined the mile high club.

You serious?

So naughty. It just happened.

Oh, my heart's still beating. Feel it.

- Uh, no, no.
- Feel it.

Y-You actually fucked someone?

No, on my own.

Just had a wank, isn't it?

Mate...

I'm gonna have a nap, yeah?

I'm knackered after that.

Was gushing Out.
It was gushing out, mate.

From the pressure.

Came out like a bloody burst pipe, mate.

- Miche.
- Can I ask you a massive favor?

Basically I've told the entire Internet
that I've gone to Japan with GRINDAH,

but now it turns Out
we weren't included.

Oh, fuck. Sorry.

It's okay, though. I've got a plan.

- All right. Uh...
- Can I just...?

- Have you got chopsticks?
- What?

Can you bring those in, Angel?

- Give us that one.
- Oh, I'm so tired, you know.

Aren't we going home?

We can't go home.

But why can't you go home?

- We're supposed to be in Japan.
- One more.

What are you doing, Steve?

Bruv, I need to open the window.

Well, you can't open the window.

No, I'm suffocating. I need to get off.

Well, you can't get off.
We're on a plane, Steven.

We need to get off it because...

Fuck are you two doing, man?

- What the fuck's going on?
- The plane's shrinking.

Steve's being weird.
I think his wraps have burst.

Bruv, you missed it.
The plane's shrinking,

and, well, I need to tell the pilot.

No, the plane's normal size, innit?

- What?
- Let's get our heads together.

- Tie this around him.
- Ah, what's that?

- Why are they coming down?
- What?

Steve, we just need you to calm down.

- The government is sedating us.
- Keep talking to me. Yeah.

When you look up in the sky,
you see those lines?

We need to speak to the crew.
I want to speak to the pilot.

It's all right, it's all right.
It's all right.

We're gonna speak to the pilot. It's all
right. We're gonna speak to the pilot.

- It's all right.
- Steves! No.

No, Steves, no, no, no, don't.
They'll fucking...

- Listen, everyone...
- No, no, you're not allowed.

- We should tell everyone.
- Come On.

- They don't know what's happening.
- Shh.

- Everybody, get down.
- Yeah, it's all good.

We're his carers.

It's been compromised.
The plane's been compromised.

I never take more than I can handle.
That's the key with drugs.

Know your limit
and take exactly that amount.

- Oh, no. No.
- It's all right, mate.

Ah, shit.

Oh, fuck's sake.

- Sorry, sorry.
- We need to get away.

What are you doing?

Literally the only side effects
I've ever had from drugs is

I've got dyslexia from smoking skunk,
and I got a free laptop for that.

So, in a way, it was a victory.

- Tie his hands up!
- Why can't anyone see?!

- Shut up, Steve.
- Why can't you see?

Can't take him anywhere.

Look happier, Angel.

- Why?
- Come on. Smile for the camera.

You're in Japan. You should be happy.

- We're not in Japan.
- Well, eat some noodles, then.

No. This is so stupid.

If you're gonna look miserable,
then pout at least.

All right, Miche?

Oh, yeah, Roche.
Can you get a pic for us, actually?

I'm struggling a bit
to get one of the two of us.

Do you not think that this is
maybe completely mental?

No, God, no. I need to be there
with GRINDAH in Japan.

- I'm supporting him.
- But you're not there.

I am on Instagram.

Temple.

I haven't been to that temple.

- God, you could've fooled me.
- Yeah, exactly.

I'm not doing that.

Well, you are. 'Cause you're in Japan.

No, I'm tired of this.

Kids. They won't do anything.

- They don't want to go to school.
- Yeah.

Don't want to go to Japan.
What do they want?

It's the kids that's the problem, innit?

Yeah. Hard work.

All right.
Well, have a lovely, um, evening.

Oh, thank you. Or as we say in Japan...

Thank you.

All right.

Should we take
his life jacket off?

Nah.

Great neck support, actually.

- Yeah.
- Might get mine out.

You might not be up for this,

but do you want to watch Fast & Furious
at the exact same time?

- Um...
- And talk about it while it plays.

I'd love nothing more.

Three, two, one.

- Nice.
- Yeah, spot-on.

- Perfectly in sync.
- Exact same time, yeah.

I wonder if we're gonna
have fans at the airport.

- Put shades on him.
- What are you doing?

- I want to go home now.
- Come here.

- Get your bag On.
- I want to go home now.

Sorry, sir, can I...

Sorry, can I take this from you
before you leave, please?

- What is it?
- I'm sorry.

You can't leave the aircraft
with this on.

Smell that.

- Petrol.
- No, it's success.

- Japan City!
- Japan!

Look at the Eiffel Tower.
That is mad, innit?

Oh, yeah, fuck.
They must have moved it.

Oh, my days. Look how much neon
there is everywhere.

Oh, God, whoever does
their electricity...

Scottish Power,
they must be raking it in up here.

- Jesus Christ.
- Look, mate.

Kurupt FM!

Oh, they was all looking.
They was all looking.

Think I might be sick on myself.

- No, open me first.
- This is it, boys.

- You all right?
- These are bellboys.

- They're gonna take our luggage for us.
- Bellboys.

- Do you get it? Bellboys.
- What?

Bell-end.

Oh, my days, bruv.

- Yeah.
- Oh, my God, look at the view!

Wow, Japan City.

All looks the same, but it is sick.

- Oh, God, yeah. Yeah.
- Innit?

I need to go toilet.

- Bags my bed.
- Bags this one.

Bags my bed.

Right.

- You're gonna love it.
- Go. Go.

Oh, didn't realize
they had a staircase here.

Fucking hell, you bastard.

- Do you get it?
- Yeah, let me do one.

- Miming. Miming.
- Let me do One.

Uh, check this, check this, check this.

- What's that?
- Skllng.

- Skllng.
- Ski... I'm skllng.

- That's good.
- You can literally do anything.

- Yeah. Oh, I got another one.
- Yeah, go.

Go. Tap in.

- Level three, please.
- Yeah.

- Minus three.
- Yeah.

Lift! Oh, I should've thought of that.

- It's quite comfortable.
- Yeah.

Fucking hell.

- Bruv?
- Yeah.

We finally fucking made it.

I think we have, mate.

Madness.

Check this out!

Oh, that's insane.

Is this Pissing Alley?

- What? Huh?
- Pissing Alley.

Can you just piss anywhere down here?

- Yeah, basically.
- What we out here for?

What's it look like we're out here for?

Do you know what I'm saying?
We're out here to get a record deal.

Look at that.

We're out here to take over Japan,

- repair their music scene...
- Yeah.

And show 'em what Kurupt FM's about.
DO you know what I'm saying, like?

Never do that chick.

I'd give her one.

- They don't know what they're in for.
- No.

- Lucky bastards.
- Innit?

15 years later, we're here, mate.

- Madness. Throw your "K" s up.
- Trust me.

- Kurupt FM, the rebirth, like.
- Yeah.

- Trust me.
- Oh, I'm fucking starving, mate.

- Yeah, let's get some food.
- You hungry?

- Yeah, yeah.
- Oh, I know a spot. I know a spot.

This way, boys! Come On! Tokyo!

Fucking hell, this is nuts!

Why is there so many crossings?

Decoy?

Decoy?

Decoy!

- Decoy!
- Over here, Steves.

- Follow my voice.
- Bruv, where are you going, bruv?

You fucking left me
in the middle of the road.

- Do you even know where we are?
- Yeah, Tokyo.

- Go that way.
- Chabzy, I'm starving.

Yes, okay, we'll get ramen.

- Oh.
- Oh.

Wow.

- Mmm.
- This is soup.

That looks delicious.
With a brown egg in.

How's that?

- I don't like it.
- Ah, I don't...

Come, boys, this way.

Be a lot easier to read
if it was in English, innit?

- Where are we going?
- I don't know, mate.

This place is like a bloody maze, mate.

- Bro! McD's!
- Oh!

- Fucking McD's!
- Got a McD's here!

I knew it, I knew it! I knew I was...

I was taking them this way,
SO I meant to do that.

Are we really gonna go,
like, McDonald's, like?

Oh, shut up, Decoy.
Don't you dare take this away from me.

Come on, Deeky.

- The golden arches!
- Deeky, come on!

- Bonsai!
- Bonsai!

Bonsai. Drink this, Steves.

God, it's like the future, innit?

Salaryman.
Check out these salarywomans.

It's mad how everyone's
dressed in suits. Ah, this is mad, bruv.

Steve?

Steves. Look at me.

You got to concentrate on not looking
like an absolute mess, yeah?

It's gonna be One Of
the most important meetings

of our lives today, all right? Yeah?

- Wipe the gak.
- Yeah.

Side of your mouth.

Oh?

Yeah. And the other side.

Cool. Okay, yeah.

Now you're good.
I don't want to look at him anymore.

Let's roll.

- Wow.
- Wow.

- Fucking hell.
- It's massive.

This is it, boys.
Big time, big time!

Ah! Ariga... Uh, konnichiwa.

Kurupt FM.

- Uh, manager.
- Okay.

Okay, so ticket... uh, I'll do it, yeah.

- Give to you. No, no, no.
- Oh, a ticket.

- I'll do it. Yeah, take that.
- What's that for?

You give to me and I'll give to them.
GO.

- That's the lift?
- Oh, my God.

- Fucking hell.
- Massive.

- Wow.
- Fucking hell.

Yeah, pretty high up, boys.

- What a view.
- Gotham City shit.

Stevie, keep it together,
mate. Keep it together.

- All right, just act...
- I'll follow your lead.

- Hello.
- All right.

Oh, wow, that's finally
the respect we deserve.

Love that. Loving all that.

Cheers. Oh, sorry.

Uh...

He says you don't need to do that.

All good. We insist.

Yeah, we heard you lot
get weird about it, so...

What are you doing?
Steves, not your socks.

Not the socks.

Sorry, I'm just, uh,
very excited to be here.

- What a place you've got here.
- Yeah.

- Good lumbar on these as well.
- Oh, God, yeah.

Well, um, you guys can call me Taka,
A&R manager.

We're really excited to have you here.

And this is MIKI,
who I've organized to be

- your translator and fixer.
- Great.

Fixer?

Well, if you wanted a fixer,
I would've brought my bloody tool belt.

Oh, sorry, I'm CHABUDDY G.
I'm the boys' manager of Kurupt FM.

- Oh, okay.
- Yeah.

We weren't expecting you, so...

No, no, I paid for myself. Yeah.

- Should I get some more chairs?
- Oh, no, no, it's totally fine.

I can, uh, free roam. I can hot desk.

- Sure?
- Yeah, he's fine. It's...

First of all, on behalf of

- Global Business Development...
- I think he's speaking.

We'd like to formally welcome you
to Japan.

Okay, are you saying
the same thing he's saying

- or is that to...
- Yeah.

Oh, okay. And first of all,
we would like to...

To him, yeah?

Yes.

FOrmally accept
your invitation to your country

and show you a little bit
of what we have to offer.

- Let's just start with the "ays."
- Yeah.

♪ Hey!

♪ Deppon the mic
Me have to kick on riddim

♪ MC GRINDAH pon the mix Anna blend

♪ DJ Beat, him me right-hand friend

♪ Bust microphone
just like a automatic skeng!

- Ragga rap.
- Wow!

Uh, do you want
to translate that for them?

- Uh...
- I'm not sure I can.

- Too deep to translate.
- Yeah.

Thanks again for coming.

So, obviously people know
your track from the TV show.

Fucking hell, yeah.

This is great, right?

♪ Bang, lyrical blow to the jaw

Really?

So, what do you think of
the game show?

The game show is weird, innit?
Do you know what I'm saying?

I wouldn't say we like the show,
but, like, it's what they do out here.

It's what they... it's culture.
Like, who am I to judge?

Do you know what I'm saying?

If you want to dress up
in a pink leotard

and start dancing around
dressed as a strawberry

listening to my track, that's up to you.

It's like when you hear
a drum and bass tune in an advert.

And that drum and bass tune
wasn't made for the new Fiat Punto.

- NO, it wasn't.
- Do you know what I mean?

It was made for ten white bros
with dreadlocks in a squat rave.

They're nuts out here, in't they?

- Mental.
- This TV show is massive in Japan,

so basically, everyone in Japan
knows your track.

So what we want to do now is to put...

- Please, uh, excuse me.
- Are you...

- Um...
- I was... I'm just gonna go toilet...

- Steves, this is the best bit.
- Uh...

I'll show you where it is.

Thank you. It's just a piss,
so I won't take long.

- Thank you.
- Back to it. Um...

- Looks like a Calvin Klein advert.
- Yeah, it does as well.

Yeah. I love you guys,
and I think there's great potential.

We look fucking great
in black and white, mate.

Okay, so, um...

What the fuck are you doing?

This... the toilet sprayed me.

- Sprayed water.
- Oh.

- Oh.
- Does it look like I pissed myself?

Yes, a little bit.

I actually haven't this time.

This time?

I mean, some...

- You are funny.
- Yeah, no.

I was joking about that.

- Um...
- Uh, there's a dryer in the toilet.

Okay.

- Can you pull the pants?
- And then take...

Pull-pull pants down?

No, no, no, no. Just pull Th-this area.

I've developed a plan
for you guys.

Some promo work with TV shows and radio,

and then a big concert
to introduce you to your Japanese fans.

- Yes! Yeah.
- Fireworks as well.

I've developed a plan,
uh, for you guys as well.

Um, I think we'll do some promo work,

then big concert to introduce you
to the Japanese fans.

Yes, what do you think about that?

- Yes, I agree with that.
- Yeah? Yeah.

Great idea. Uh...

Hi. Manager.

- The manager.
- Yeah, manager, manager.

- Hi.
- Hi.

Just get right in there.

Okay, oh.

You can... you can put on my shoulder.

Thank you.

You're welcome.

How many tracks do you have?

- Ballpark is, uh, about two...
- Two...

I mean...

I mean, two, three.

- Do you know what I mean? At least.
- Max.

Yeah, at least max.

- So, you know.
- Two.

So, I mean,
that's how potent our tracks are.

- Do you know what I mean?
- Yeah.

- And-and they've lasted that test...
- Beats.

- Timeless.
- Why you showing me your crotch?

I mean, Leonardo da Vinci
only did one painting.

- Think about it.
- Yeah.

Um, so, um,
MIKI will look after you guys...

And I'll look after you.
Obviously I'm here as well.

Whatever you guys need, just ask.

Yes. Uh, can we get weed?

Steves, come on.

- NO.
- Don't lower the tone.

Enough Of the foreplay.
Let's get down... to business.

We want 10,000 Japanese yen,
up front, in cash, each.

- Yeah.
- 10,000 yen?

But that's just like 70 quid, right?

What do you mean it's like... 10,000.

Oh, well, not that, then. Not-not that.

- Guys.
- Yeah.

We wanted to talk to you
about the money side of things as well.

Um, did the TV show never contact you
about the rights to the song?

- No.
- No.

Haven't got anything. Yeah.

Actually, they did contact me, um,

but the thing is, I've had to actually
completely delete my email address

'cause I'm in the process
of being, uh, blackmailed

- at the moment.
- Oh.

Why would they blackmail you?

They said they've got footage
of me wanking through the webcam,

- and they're gonna upload...
- Bruv, that's just a scam.

Well, then how do they know
I was wanking, Deeky?

Don't translate this bit.

Uh, we'll-we'll make sure
you're looked after.

- Great.
- You're our VIPs.

Oh.

This concert is
a big opportunity for you guys.

- Where do we sign? Yeah, let's do it.
- Come On!

Let's get in the queue.

No, we-we don't queue.

Oh, yeah, we don't queue.

- Oh, wow, look, paparazzi.
- Oh.

- Let's do it.
- Going for screw face or natural?

No, just act completely natural.

Nice, huh?

- This is mad.
- Check that.

- Massive club, mate, yeah?
- It's massive, innit?

- Mad in here, innit?
- Yeah, proper, man.

- Thank you.
- Smoky, smoky?

VIPs coming through!

Very important people.

- Oh. Chicks, chicks, chicks.
- Chicks, chicks.

Steve, chicks.

- What do I do?
- Tell Decoy.

Oh. Decoy, Decoy. Chicks.

- Here we are.
- Oh, amazing.

This is SHIRO.
He's another artist on our label.

- Wagwan, G. Good, yeah?
- Yeah.

GRINDAH. GRINDAH.

- What?
- Oh. Hey, cool cap.

GRINDAH, ginger hair.

I didn't know you had gingers out here.

- Nice.
- My hair?

- Yeah.
- I-I dye.

You... Oh, you choose to be ginger?

- Wow.
- I choose to be ginger.

In England, it's the sign
Of a weaker person.

- Very, very weak.
- Yeah. Bye.

We've got our own champagne.
Beats! Oh, here we go!

Is that Brut?

Uh, Taka, one for the manager?

- One glass for me?
- Yes.

Where is it? It's coming?

Okay, guys, shall we do a toast?

- Yes, yes. Wait for it.
- Maybe wait for my glass.

Oh, here we go.

- Kurupt FM.
- Wait, wait.

The rest are irrelevant!

So, um, what's your role in Japan?

I've got a lot to do.
Lot of jobs to do, lot of tasks.

Any examples?

Examples? I mean, SO many things.
I don't even know where I could start.

I mean, I need to walk around,

talk to people,
make sure everyone's all right.

I need to make sure that,
you know, the-the...

you know, everything's all right.

- Any specific job?
- I just gave you specific.

Making sure everything's all right.

Taka, can I get my glass?
Is my glass coming?

- Yes, it's coming. It's coming.
- It's coming?

Why should I give you
all my secrets and tips

on how to be a successful manager?
You know what I mean? I'm smart.

'Cause then you could just
become the manager.

Taka could become, like...
He's not the manager, though.

I'm the manager.
Let's get that straight.

Really, tell me what you want,
I'll make it happen.

- Everything. Yep.
- Okay, okay.

Tell me, as well. Tell me what you want,
and I can make it happen, as well.

Yeah, that's really loud.
I can't hear him.

- Don't hesitate.
- Okay.

Weed, anyone?

Anyone... anyone smoke?

Anyone got any fucking weed?

Steve! Steve!

I wanted to give you this away from Taka
because he doesn't like it.

What's that? Is that a zoot?

- That's a zoot!
- Yes, it's weed.

- Yes?
- Yeah.

Oh, my God. Yes!

- I could literally hug you.
- Okay.

Yeah.

This place is absolutely mental.

- Best club I've ever been to.
- Oh, yeah.

- Oh.
- Oh.

Taka.

- Wait, can you hear that?
- MC GRINDAH...

- Uh-oh.
- Oh, my God!

- Oh, you bastard. You bastard.
- Oh!

One-nil to Taka.

- I had no idea.
- They're playing our song!

That's what I'm saying about Kurupt FM.

We can never die. Worldwide!
Do you know what I'm saying?

- Worldwide, bruv!
- Worldwide.

Watch this.

Japan have decided

- that garage is happening.
- Yeah.

Me and Beats was always gonna
take over the world.

So, how many people
have you performed to in the past?

I mean, in the past,
we've done about...

- Uh, about...
- We're looking at about...

- 20?
- No. About 200, maybe.

That's MC GRINDAH. MC GRINDAH.

I'm the manager.

Sometimes we went on at weird
times when the DJs were changing over.

Yeah, yeah, 20 people
right at that time when we were MCing,

- but to a 200-cap venue, so...
- Yeah.

- Put it that way.
- Yeah.

Boys, I got us a bottle.

- I got us a...
- Why is it half empty?

- Uh, I don't know.
- Did you steal that?

No, no, it just came like that.
I just thought it, you know...

- Hey!
- No. No, no, no.

Shit.

Come on. Okay, okay, okay, okay.
Shit, shit, shit.

Uh, boys, that's on me, yeah?

Uh, I'm gonna...
I'm gonna go back to the hotel.

I'll see you lot in a bit, yeah?

- See you later, boy.
- Watch the ponytail, mate!

- Boosh! Studio, like a studio star!
- Morning.

- Studio!
- Bah-bah-bah!

Man's going studio right now.
Do you know what I'm saying?

- Cannot fucking wait.
- Hey, you good, yeah?

- You all right?
- Yeah.

- Jump in. Jump in.
- Studio!

- Studio.
- Yeah.

Studio!

(HORN HONKS)

All right, sorry.

- Studio.
- Yeah.

Have you been to studio a lot?

We choose to go to studio
once every couple years, like, when...

'Cause the type of music we make
is, like, timeless.

- Do you know what I mean? Like...
- Yeah.

These two tunes have lasted us
a span Of 15 year.

- Yeah.
- Which is good.

Not a lot of people can do that,
not even bands like the Beatles.

- NO. Oh, God, no.
- They had to keep making albums.

- Yeah.
- 'Cause it was so dry.

- Yeah.
- They had to keep...

Keep-keep doing new...

- Reinventing themselves.
- Keep trying to find themselves.

Whereas we already knew, like.

- Do you know what I mean?
- Yeah.

- Wow.
- Studio!

Studio.

My door first.

Always my door first. Thank you.

- We're here.
- Ah, studio!

Decoy.

- Yeah, I love studio.
- Studio. Exactly.

- Yeah, course he fucking does.
- Studio!

- Oh, shoes off.
- Oh.

NO, no, no,
you don't need to do that.

- Oh, okay.
- Oh, no?

- NO.
- What you doing?

- Studio!
- Uh...

Hey, guys. Welcome.

- Mm...
- Huh?

- Come on in.
- Sorry, um...

I- I think there's been a mix-up.

- This is a fucking dance studio.
- Yes.

I thought we was doing beats today.
I'm wearing jeans.

- Yeah, I know...
- Guys, guys, this is Hiroto.

He will be teaching you
the dance routine.

He's also a huge fan, though.

We don't really do dance routines,
so this is...

- Yeah.
- Okay.

Shall we just show you, though?
It's really cool.

- We don't have to do this, do we?
- No, definitely not.

People love this dance already.

This punch is from the show.

Nice, right?

His nipple's poking out. Ugh.

Yeah, I just saw that, as well.

No, stop, stop, stop. That's...

We-we can't do that.

That's not what Kurupt FM's about.

- Yeah.
- Yeah.

Sorry. I'm...

Can I talk to you for a moment,
GRINDAH-San?

GRINDAH-San?

Yes, sensei.

- Karate Kid.
- Yeah.

This way, please.

Yeah, let's talk out here.

Yep.

I know you're the guy
that calls the shots with these boys.

- Am I right?
- Oh, God, yeah.

- I've always been a natural leader.
- Yes, I can tell. You're very clever.

- Yeah. Yeah.
- You get how the music industry works.

Dancing is what
will make you big out here.

This is the stage that you're gonna be
performing On in a few days' time.

- Oh, my days. That is nuts.
- Right?

Yeah, no, I can see myself there now.

- Look. It's me.
- Yeah, exactly.

- Cap On, innit?
- Isn't it exciting?

- And all these people...
- Yeah.

- Going crazy only for you.
- Oh, my God. Yeah.

What do you want to do?

Just stand there MCing at people.

- Stand there?
- Yeah.

In front of thousands of people?

How will they react
if you're just standing there?

Grindah's probably
going mental at him.

Yeah, man.

You're Officially
my favorite person in Japan ever.

You're okay, too.

For a gaijin.

What does that mean?
Something to do with ganja?

No. A foreigner, like an alien.

- Oh. Alien?
- Yeah.

I've been abducted by aliens.

A different sort of alien.

Oh. Mine were Greys,
if you know about them.

- Is it true?
- Yeah, yeah.

Uh, sorry, man. I'm just a bit fucking
nervous thinking about it, bruv.

- That's mad.
- This is exciting.

This is a really exciting time
for you, right?

Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah.

I hope I can do it, because...

You can, you can,
because you have natural rhythm.

- Fuck. We got to get ready.
- All right. Let's do it.

No, we've got to get on top of this.

Look. You see that there? That's...

- Yeah. There's a scar here.
- It's a little scar, yeah.

So that's where I picked out a, uh...

Well, I tried to pick out, like,
a chip that they put in my neck.

Yeah, you're special.

- Yeah, I suppose.
- Yeah, chosen.

Right, boys, uh,
we're gonna give it a go.

Um, basically,
it's music industry sort of shit,

so we just got to give the fans
what they want.

I don't know.
Can I just be, like, a DJ at the back?

Yeah, could I be a DJ at the back
as well?

No one's being a DJ at the back,
all right, yeah?

We're doing the dance,
end of, all right?

It's just what people do out here.

If you don't agree with it, you're
basically being racist, all right?

- Yeah, I don't want to be racist.
- Good.

It's gonna be hard for me
'cause I got jeans On.

Yeah, well, you're gonna
have to take 'em Off.

- Come on.
- Really?

Yeah. Take your jeans off. Come on.

Trust me,
you're gonna thank me though.

We're gonna be playing to thousands
of people on a massive stage.

Pretty lonely without the boys.

Apparently, I'm not needed.

The manager. Can you believe it?

You know what it is, yeah?

Taka's trying to push me out.

"Oh, don't worry about coming.
We've got it all sorted."

Listen, Taka is not on my level, yeah?

I'm like bloody Simon Cowell.
I'm a showman.

I used to run a titty bar back
in Hounslow, yeah, back in the '90s.

And I turned that place around,
you know?

Mercedes, she was one of
Our top strippers, yeah?

She was 62, yeah?

Caesarean scar, fake teeth.

She was busy all night long.

And who did that? I did that.
I turned that place around.

I'll tell you what, yeah,
if Taka doesn't take me seriously, yeah,

then he's gonna make himself
a very, very dangerous enemy.

He will help you.

Yeah, Okay.
That-that's really close to my arse.

Yeah. I can sort of feel it.

Okay.

So this definitely looks good,
yeah?

- Very good.
- It feels a bit mad, but I trust you.

This is what the people want to see.

Can you MC and dance
at the same time? Uh...

I didn't think you could.

- No.
- But we're still working it out.

Yeah. But you can,
because you can have headsets.

So you're excited
about playing the gig?

- Yeah, definitely.
- Yeah, I'm excited about the gig.

It's just all this
sort of mad shit around it

- that's a bit weird, innit?
- Yeah.

- Like, uh, all the dancing.
- Yeah, but it's got to be done, innit?

Yeah, well, I mean,
a lot of people don't do it,

- but it seems to be a thing out here.
- Well...

One, two, three, four.
One, two, three...

And then we go forward. One, two...

Just concentrate on the hips.

One, two, three, four.

One, two... Nice.

Four. One, two...

Can we go karaoke later?

- Konnichiwa, bitches!
- Wh-what...

Surprise! Aw.

Oh, look, you can see Japan
out the window.

- SO cool.
- Yeah, yeah, yeah. That's...

- You flew her out?
- No, I didn't fly her out.

I didn't... I didn't know.

I- I bought a ticket.

Oh, wow. Where did you get
the money from?

Oh, Roche lent me some. Yeah.

She said I should come out, or otherwise
we'd all go completely insane.

- Uh...
- Best surprise ever!

Well, it's definitely a surprise.

- Oh, man, man. That's...
- Oh! It's crazy.

Are we still sharing a room,
or am I gonna have to move?

Uh, hmm.

Wh-What did you think?
Did you have a...?

Obviously,
I was gonna stay in here with you.

- Yeah? No, okay. Yeah, no.
- Yeah.

- Of course. Yeah... Yeah, probably.
- Shall I just get your key card now?

Well, we don't have to do it now.

- How are you, then, Bubby?
- Yeah.

Tell me all about Japan.
I love it from up here.

You do need to be there
to support your partner.

You know, it's important, even
if they say they don't want you there.

Yeah, I know. Me, too.
I'm knackered, but I'm gonna keep going.

'Cause I was reading about jet lag,
and I was like,

- you stay awake, then it's fine.
- Yeah.

You know, it's about me
making sure Grindah's okay.

Has he eaten enough?
Has he eaten too much?

You know, is he tired?
Is he happy? Is he sad?

And, you know, I suppose, in return,
that gives my life some purpose.

'Cause I'd love another baby,
but until then, I've got him.

- See you later.
- You all good?

What shall we do about the room service?

Oh, she can have it.

The honeymoon suite.

Hello.

- All right? What you saying?
- Yeah, good, man. You all right?

- Kevin.
- What you doing?

Oh, it stinks in here, man.

What's happening?

Yes, bruv.

So, I'm in here now.

Where can I sleep?

Oh, tell you what, you can have it.

Hold on, let me just clear it up
for you.

Sorry, I just had a bit of a cold,
basically.

So, yeah, just go for it, man.
It's all yours.

Beats, does it smell of skunk?

Yeah.

- Did they straighten your hair as well?
- Yeah.

- It feels really weird without the hat.
- Yeah.

Hi, Steves.

- Good. That's good.
- Good, yeah?

- Sweet. Okay.
- Okay, let's go.

- Can I get my hat?
- Yeah.

Yes, yes, yes.

I'm not sure about this, mate.
It's a bit... It's not really Kurupt FM.

- Okay. Let's go.
- What the fuck does that mean?

- Let's go.
- Here we go.

- Signature fringe.
- Come on, boys.

Spot on.

Like that?

Um, no, a bit more front.

Nice.

Well, GRINDAH...
just-just GRINDAH, uh, step forward.

- Just GRINDAH?
- Okay. Yeah, yeah.

And, boys, let's step back.

Me, like, back here a little bit?

- Nice.
- Bubby, remember your angles, yeah?

- Your chin's coming out.
- Oh. Yeah, okay.

And, Beats, step back, please.

- Oh, with... Okay.
- Oh, beautiful.

I just want to make sure
we're definitely in shot.

- Yes. Yes.
- Definitely getting us back there?

Yes. Okay.

- More back.
- More back.

- More back.
- More back? Hmm.

Well, maybe ten steps back.

- Ten?
- Ten.

Something like that, just leaning?

Oh, GRINDAH, that looks amazing.

Feel like
I'm in quite an unnatural position.

Hi. Hi.

What does Taka wear?

I read a lot of literature.

And One book that I love
is Sun Tzu, The Art of War.

Don't know if you've read of it.

But in there, he basically says
that in order to defeat your enemy,

you first must know your enemy,
become your enemy.

Oh, it's a bit tight.

Oh, shit.

Sorry. Yeah, sorry, it's a bit tight.

Just get... It's too small.

Sorry, get... get it off me.

- Slowly, slowly.
- Pull. AH!

- Oh.
- Oh, God.

I nearly had a panic attack then.

Oh, benchod.

- Are you jealous, then?
- I'm not jealous of Taka.

What's to be jealous of?

Like, yeah, okay, sure,
he's, you know, young,

successful, good-looking, handsome.

He smells amazing.

Like, really good.

But what's to be jealous of, mate?

- No. No. No.
- NO. NO.

- Yeah, probably...
- No.

- This One.
- No. Too fat.

I'm not jealous!

Look at this, look at this 'tache.

He can't grow this
if his bloody life depended on it.

Got pubes on his face, mate.

Taka...

Too fat.

All right, you've said that.
Stop saying that.

All right, then get me that one.

GRINDAH, GRINDAH, maybe bow to the lens.

- Okay.
- But, uh, GRINDAH, look at the lens.

- Okay.
- And, guys, uh, look at the ground.

I don't know, man. Can I try One
where I look at the lens as well?

- Just to see what it looks like.
- Okay, we can, we can have a go at it.

- Okay, let's do it.
- Okay, you ready?

Start again, then? On three.

- Okay.
- Three.

It doesn't work. Okay, thank you.

Are you guys a boy band now?

Well, not really a boy band
as per Se, but...

It's going that way, though.

No, it's not going that way.
What is a boy band?

- Was Heartless Crew a boy band?
- No.

Think about it. It's a group of boys
that are in a... like, a band.

- Something like this?
- SO we're together?

Um, actually, let's do individual ones.

- Okay.
- Okay.

Uh, just me. Cheers.

I declare war, Taka!

Have you told him that?

No, I haven't told him that yet.

But when I see him, I'm declaring war.

Lovely to meet you, Taka.

He doesn't really know
there's a war going on,

but I know there's a war going on.

So I'm ten steps ahead. Chess.

And guess what, Taka?

Checkmate, mate.

Hey, Taka, remember me?
I'm CHABUDDY G, the manager!

Sorry. Sorry.

Ah, yes, lovely.

One more. One more.

Yes, we got it! I think we're done.

- Oh, sick.
- Well done, Bubby.

- Thank you so much.
- Where do you want me?

Just like... here?

Sorry. Uh, we ran out of time. Um...

I thought you said
it was individual shots.

Yes, um, but, um...

While they're just here, maybe one?
Maybe a couple?

- Yeah, but we got some...
- Okay, well, just take one.

- Just take one.
- Okay.

Done.

We, uh,
still on for dinner later?

You know it, brother.

- What?
- Let's go.

But I thought he said
we were all going karaoke.

The things that I learned today,

the different sort of looks I could do.

- Yeah. Very versatile, though.
- Yeah.

Innit, boys? It was good fun

for Kurupt FM first photo shoot
out in Tokyo, innit?

Yeah.

- Oh...
- Yeah.

Oh, Beats,
you're not still being salty

because he was doing
more Of me than you?

No. But I feel like an idiot.

Beats, if you feel like an idiot,
you will look like an idiot.

So, at the moment, you look
like a fucking idiot. Well done.

Do you not feel like an idiot?

Well, no, 'cause I'm wearing it
with confidence.

Do you know what I mean?
Like an admiral.

Well, I don't think anyone pulls Off
this admiral look, to be honest, like.

- Oh, really?
- We're a garage crew.

- Oh, thanks, mate.
- We're not, we're not...

- A garage?
- We don't work on a boat.

Oh, that's funny, 'cause where did
pirate radio come from, then?

- On pirate ships back in the day, bruv.
- Yeah...

Think about it.
This all makes sense, bruv.

He's looked into the history of it.
You're not thinking about that.

The original pirate radio, yeah,
was On a ship, yeah?

Pirates on boats, yeah?

I am the captain of our ship.

Why did we straighten our hair, though?

Yeah. Pirates don't have hair like this.

I look like fucking Leslie
from EastEnders.

Do you reckon, uh,
it's a bit much, what you're wearing?

NO, I googled, "What do
Japanese women wear to dinner?"

and this came up.

Taka! You all right? Oh.

Sorry. Forgot about the old shoes.

- Is she Okay?
- Yes, she's fine. She...

- Does she need to do that?
- No... Yes.

Okay.

Oh, my God!

- This is mad, innit?
- Fucking hell!

- I've never seen anything like this.
- Yeah.

- Please, have a seat.
- So, just, yeah, have a seat.

- That's mad. Just on the floor?
- No one look.

Look, origami. That's so cool.

Yes, I can make it...

Oh, and then it becomes a napkin.

Ah.

- Hi, Steves.
- Fucking hell. This place is nuts.

I normally just pick up
from Decoy's uncle's car.

Just doing it here?

- Are you in a rush?
- No.

Do you want a drink?

Uh, oh, what, just sit and have a drink?

Pretend we're normal people?

- Yeah, we can try.
- Yeah. Yeah.

- Cheers.
- Cheers.

Uh...

Uh, how long shall we...?

We... I suppose we finish
the beers at least, yeah?

Yeah.

- And-and then that's her performing.
- Wow.

She does a bit of singing.

- Wow.
- Sort of a professional dancer.

- Are you her father?
- Yeah. Yeah, yeah.

- But...
- I know what you're thinking.

She's a little bit darker than I am,

but that's because
I'm a quarter Cypriot,

so she's got the, uh, lovely coloring.

Yeah, uh,
and when I was pregnant,

I used a lot of fake tan,
um, On my skin,

and then it seeped through
just into my womb.

But, uh, who-who is the man
in the photo?

That is, uh... that's just Decoy.

Yeah, no, he, um...
he's just a family friend.

Yeah, he's got nothing
to do with it, so...

Oh, hey, guys.

Sorry I'm late. What have I missed?

You all right, CHABUDDY?

- Yeah.
- Why are you here?

Why are you dressed like that,
and barefoot as well?

Well, this is what I'm wearing.
This is what managers wear.

I'm your manager, aren't I? So...

- Nice Kindle.
- Yeah?

It's cheaper than your iPad, mate.

Bruv, what you doing here, man?
We're fucking having a meal.

- I'm supposed to be your manager.
- Yeah, supposed to be. It's...

You can't do everything without me.

We seem to be doing okay, right?

I wasn't talking to you, Taka.

I'm talking to my artist.

Come on. I mean,
what-what are you saying?

That y-you basically...
You don't need me?

What have you done
since you've come out here?

You've just followed us
and done fuck all, as usual.

I- I get it. No, I get it.
It's like that, yeah?

So I might as well just go home.

Huh? Shall I go home, Tony?

How long have I known you for, man?

Been through so much.

Okay, just think.
I'm giving you ultimatum.

It's me or Taka.

Well...

It's up to you. It's not my game, is it?

Okay, I'm going now.

This is me going home.

What's...?

Sorry.

- Wow.
- Wow.

So, is that tea in there?
Is that see-through tea?

- No, no, it's sake.
- No, no, sake.

Okay, look, that didn't go
exactly as I planned. Um...

Just to be clear,
did I just fire myself?

- Yeah.
- Yeah, I think that's what happened.

That was also my understanding.

Okay, just checking.

- Back home, I have a weed farm.
- Yes?

- I grow my own cannabis.
- Really?

- Yeah, yeah, I'm a cannabis expert...
- You-you have a farm?

I would say. Yeah.

You're-you're a DJ?

- Yeah.
- And a farmer?

- Yeah, yeah, yeah.
- You do a lot.

- Yeah.
- You're a hard worker.

Yeah, very...

- I mean, for me...
- Wow!

For me, it's very easy.

Have you ever had a girlfriend?

I do look at people who, like,
are in, like, relationships and that,

and I sometimes think, "What am I doing
that's so different to them?"

Thank you.

And then I think, it's probably just
that I don't leave the house ever.

Fucking hell. Watch the doorway.
Oh, you don't need to.

And that I sleep on the floor
and don't wash that much.

Apart from that, though, it's like,
"What do you want from me?"

- Okay, well, you have my number.
- Yeah, yeah, yeah.

- Yeah.
- I'll just, uh, yeah...

- Yeah, okay.
- Skype you or whatever.

- Yeah.
- Yeah, o... yeah.

- All right, yeah.
- Yeah, all right.

Oh.

- Good night.
- Night.

MIKI?

MIKI, come back!
I need to say something.

- I forgot to get the weed off you.
- Yeah, I forgot!

I know.

The point of the drinks.

Whole thing would've been
completely pointless.

Um, yeah.

Well, it was still fun.

- Shall we...?
- Yeah.

Uh, let's go over there.

- Over there? Oh, yeah.
- Yeah.

That's a bit bait, innit?

All right? There you go.

Sick. All right, see you later.

Drug dealers are mad out here, innit?
SO elaborate.

Me and Alfie Danger, literally,
never been for a drink once.

Shall we try it and see if it's...?

Let's see.

It's...

- Good?
- Oh, yeah.

Yeah, it tastes normal. Tastes normal.

Now, GRINDAH-San, one thing I wanted
to run by you is the name change.

Mm. Yeah.

For what? What name change?

We're a bit worried people will
find the name Kurupt FM confusing.

- Really?
- You're not a radio station now.

You want to be a successful music act.
Right?

- Uh, yeah, but...
- Yeah.

So we're gonna be looking
at rethinking the name

to something a bit more relevant.

We're thinking Bang Boys.

- Bang Boys?
- Bang Boys.

- Bang Boys.
- Bang Boys?

People have already
started calling you the Bang Boys.

- I haven't heard that.
- "Oh, my God, it's the Bang Boys."

- Really?
- Yeah. "Where's the Bang Boys?"

See? So we're really
just doing it for the fans.

It's all about as many people
knowing who you are

- as possible, right?
- Yeah.

The audience will love it. Trust me.

Bubby,
are you feeling a bit nervous?

I'm not nervous.
I'm excited, if anything.

First time on telly, innit, boys?

It's not my first time.
I-I was On Live & Kicking.

Wait, what is it we're doing?

Look, promo is very important.

And one of the main things about promo

is doing things you wouldn't
really usually want to do.

- Yeah.
- Nice, innit, Beats?

Yeah, it's weird.

Fucking hell, this is pink.

- Who'd have thought it, innit?
- Yeah, I would never have thought this.

Wow.

If we do do well, like,
Taka said he's gonna hook us up

with one of the biggest artists
in Japan.

- Oh, yeah, exactly, yeah.
- SO...

- And probably sort of grime or...
- Reggae. Yeah.

And maybe doing, like, a...
like, a double album or something.

Yeah.
Sort of like, um, Shaggy and Sting.

- That's a great album.
- Really good.

- Mad.
- Look how they're dressed. All right?

Massive. GM probably.

- "Bang Boys."
- Yeah.

- What's that?
- That's our new name now.

- What?
- It's our new name.

- I'll talk to you about it later.
- Bang Boys?

- Yes, Bang Boys. What?
- What do you mean, that's our new name?

It's our new name just for now.

We can change it back to Kurupt FM
when we're ready.

- Taka... look...
- Wait, hold on.

That's a big change,
Bang Boys from Kurupt FM.

- Bang Boys?
- Yeah, Bang Boys.

Yeah, yeah, no, it's 'cause
of the "bang" song, innit? Bang Boys.

- What?
- It's not a big deal. It's what they...

It's what you translate our name
Out here.

- Yeah.
- Do you know what I mean? So...

- Bang Boys?
- It's just...

- It's easier for them.
- Yes, Bang Boys.

- What's wrong with Kurupt FM?
- It sounds like a pirate radio station.

Yeah, well, that's what we are.

But we're not anymore. That's the point.

There's no bands that sound
like radio stations, are there?

Yeah, but there's no bands
that sound like a pedophile ring either.

Yeah, it doesn't sound
like a pedophile ring.

It sounds like
we bang people in the face.

So we're going with Bang Boys.

Okay, these are your outfits.

- There you are.
- Fuck's sake.

- Can't we just wear our own stuff?
- It's called promo, mate.

If you can't handle the fame,
get Out the kitchen.

- There you are.
- What?

Fucking Taka.

Thinks he can come over here
and shit On my plate, yeah?

Fucking benchod.

Thinks he's won the war, yeah?

Well, guess who's still paying
for my drinks, mate.

Barmaid.

Yes?

Double whiskey on the rocks.
Hold the ice.

And I'll tell you what,
get yourself one as well.

It's on me, Taka.

Who else wants one, huh?

Boys, you want a drink?

Come on, let me get you a drink.

It's on me, Taka.

Come on!

Aw, look at you lot.
You look so cute.

All your little bottoms walking along.

I've never seen so much of you all.

Aw! Cute bum.

We're actually doing it.

- Beats.
- Yeah.

- Are you all right?
- Yeah.

- Sure?
- Yeah.

It'll be done soon, and then...
DO you know what I mean?

- I don't think I can do this.
- Oh, great. Here we go.

Stop being selfish. It's not about you.

Just, uh, w-with the swimming...
I'm not sure if I can swim.

Yeah, we're not doing this.
Me and Steves aren't doing it.

- Oh...
- Yo, I'm out, too, man.

What the fuck are we even doing here?
This ain't what Kurupt FM's about.

This is bigger than Kurupt FM, bruv.
Look at it.

What? Nothing's bigger than Kurupt FM.
You used to say that.

Yeah? And you used to work in Megabowl.

Yeah? Well, I'd rather work in Megabowl
than be a fucking Bang Boy.

So why don't you and Taka
be the Bang Boys

since he loves you so much?

N-No. I'd just do it on my own, yeah?
I'd be called the Bang Boy.

Or, uh, MC GRINDAH,
brackets, Solo Project.

How's about that? Yeah?
Hold me back, bruv.

- Hmm?
- Hold me back.

You're fucking lucky Decoy's holding me
back, bruv. I swear down.

He's-he's not even touching you.

Oh, is he not? He's not touching me?

- No.
- Okay. All right, then. Cool.

- What you doing? What you doing?
- He's not touching me. No, no.

No, you want me in your face, do you?
Huh? Huh?

- Not really.
- Oh, you want me, yeah?

Oh, you want me off the leash? Okay.

- Yeah, well, go off the leash.
- See what happens then.

- Go off the fucking leash.
- Fucking see what happens.

- Go off the leash. I'm ready.
- Oh, my God.

- My jaw's clenched ready for impact.
- Oh, my God.

I beg you, I beg you, try something now.

- Yeah? I'm waiting for you.
- I beg you... No, go on.

- Free hit.
- I'm waiting for you.

- Oh, I'm waiting for it.
- Come on, boy, hit me. Hit me.

- I'd love to. I'd fucking love to.
- GO On, sweetheart.

- What you doing?
- Fuck you doing?!

- What are you fucking doing?
- Boys...

Don't you dare touch my hat!

- The hat's fine.
- Stop it.

- Get off me!
- Stop.

No punching!

Aah! That's my leg!

I've got you by the balls now.
Got you by the balls now.

No cocks. No cock grabbing.

- Don't you...
- Stop it.

Stop it. Stop it.

Stop it. Stop.

Stop.

- Say sorry!
- You say sorry!

- No, you say sorry!
- You say sorry!

- NO, you say sorry!
- Your shoe's come off.

Beats, I'm putting your shoe back on.

Yeah, that's right. Your shoe's off now.

And that's what fucking happens
if you fuck with me, yeah?

- I'm done.
- You're fired! You're all fired.

Come on, Steve, let's go.

Where's my helmet?

What are you doing?

Sayonara, you fat lemon.

Bubby, calm down. Stop it.

- Are you crying?
- I'm not crying!

Okay, calm down.
You've got a show on, right?

- Please stop it.
- What are you doing now?

It's making me cry 'cause of
the adrenaline coming through my body.

- SO you are crying?
- I'm not crying. It's adrenaline!

You're not making sense.

Stop it.

- Fucking little prick.
- Shh.

- How dare he try to fight me!
- Stop it.

- Please keep your voice down.
- It's adrenaline.

It's natural for this to happen
after a fight.

This happens after fights.
You've never had One.

- I'm gonna go.
- I'm so angry!

I'm so angry.

Nice.

Hey!

Fuck Taka.

Fuck Taka!

Oh! More drink! Hey!

This is a bloody wooden box.

We're drinking out a bloody wooden box.

- Have you called them?
- Yeah.

- They're not answering their phones.
- Fucking little pussy's, man.

Are you ready?

- You'll be fine.
- Yeah.

It's just a bit of fun. Come on.

It looks fucking tiny.

- He's a bit worried about the size.
- What is tiny?

- I'm not worried. No, no.
- What's tiny?

- I'm trying...
- Nothing's tiny.

- Stop telling everyone.
- Come on. You're on.

- But you're on telly. It's amazing.
- Have fun.

Bang, bang, bang, bang, bang, bang!

Bang!

Yes!

Oh, my God. Yeah!

Come on, come on!

Um, I think there's been a mix-up.

I- I don't know how to do this.

No, I've... Fuck's sake.

I- I've never done
anything like this before.

What?

I don't know how to do it.
I don't know how to do it!

Ah!

Ah! Whoa!

Fuck!

Oh... I'm doing it.

I'm doing it.

♪ Bang, lyrical blow to the jaw

♪ Bang, lyrical blow to the jaw

♪ Bang, lyrical blow to the jaw

everyone wants to be famous.

That's the main ambition everyone has.
And if they don't get that,

then they want to be, like, a teacher
or whatever until they become famous.

It's not funny.

It's dangerous.

- Oh, his face, though.
- I know.

And I pop the shoulder out.
I pop it back in.

I pop the shoulder out.
I pop it back in.

I'm a hard geezer.

I look like a nice guy,
but, really, I'll kill you.

Excuse me. The bill.

It's okay. Put it on the room tab.
The room tab.

- That's what I'm saying. I'm a hard...
- Sorry. The tab has been closed.

No tab.

What?

Hey, listen, guys. Guys, guys.

There's been a mix-up, and I need
you lot to help me with the bill.

Because I-I...

Okay, no problem.

No problem. I'll be back.

- Ex-Excuse me.
- Yes.

You-you know the guys there
at the table?

Um, they actually...

'Cause they're so nice,
they're really nice guys,

they said that they're gonna
pay for the bill.

- Yes?
- Yeah, they said they will pay.

They're going to pay, so...

Hey, if you're gonna pay for the bill,
say, "Fuck Taka!"

- Fuck Taka!
- Okay?

Okay, thank you.

Uh, I'll go for a wee... a wee-wee.

- Fuck Taka.
- Fuck Taka.

Just popping out for some fresh air...

Shit.

I'm...

Yeah, I'm just... I'll be right back!

- Ah... Oh...
- Don't go!

I'll be right back! Don't worry!

- Oi!
- I'll be right back!

I wish GRINDAH all the best.
I-I really do.

And I don't really want him to fail,
but if he does fail, good.

Oh, you need me
to go back-to-back, do you,

for a comeback set in England?

Well, no one gives a shit anymore.

And I'll tell you why.
Because you sold out.

I thought he cared, like,
and, like, if someone cared, yeah,

they'd just put on the fucking leotard.
Do you know what I mean?

Is a leotard worth
a friendship of 15 years?

Okay, okay. Okay, I'll go.

Okay, I'm going.

Bloody hell.

You know what,
all these years, yeah,

I thought, yeah, I'm a hustler,
I'm an entrepreneur.

But you know what,
maybe I just messed this one up.

Maybe I have failed.
Maybe I'm not a hustler.

Maybe I'm not an entrepreneur.

All good things do have
to come to an end eventually.

Like Queen, like,
one of the greatest bands of all time

till Eddie Murphy got fucked up
On-On coke and ruined it.

Even when he's dead, yeah,
those songs will live On.

I'm just thinking, um...

DO we, um...
Do we have anyone there that...

- Taka?
- Yeah?

Do we have anyone there
that would, uh...

Uh, sorry. Hang on.

What...

Just got to...

Uh, he's just doing an email, I think.

I presume he's emailing.

So, we're at studio.

You always open
the back one first. Why did you...

- Bubby. Bubby.
- GRINDAH-San.

- Bubby, I can't believe I'm at studio!
- Don't shout so much.

- Say it. Studio!
- Come on.

- Studio!
- Studio!

Hey, we don't say it too many times
when we do it, SO just come On.

Yeah? Some of that, you fucking prick!

What you saying, Steves?

Uh, just, uh, texting MIKI.

- Yeah?
- Yeah.

Trying to link her
before we leave, yeah?

Uh, no, I've got enough draw now, so...

What? Bruv, come on.

Like, you like her, innit?

Just lips her, for God's sake, Steve.

You're exotic out here.

Back home, you're just a butters freak.

Make the most of it.

Yeah, listen, yeah,
if you like her, just tell her.

You're both weird. It makes sense.

Yeah, don't overthink it.

Like, just go down there. Be a man.

- Be a man?
- Be confident, as well, sort of...

Yeah, exactly.

And make your voice deeper
and push your shoulders back.

Here we go.

Oh, my God.
I feel like we're in a Drake video.

Yeah.

- What is that?
- Just a classic mixing desk.

- It just turns it up and down.
- Really?

- Ooh.
- GRINDAH.

- Yeah?
- You remember SHIRO, right?

- Yeah. I'm not working with him, am I?
- Oh, yes.

He's got millions Of fans Out here in
Japan, so it'll really get you noticed.

Well, if you're famous,
we should get a selfie,

- shouldn't we?
- Yeah, yeah. Yeah.

I'm sorry.

What shall I say to her?

Should I say, like,
"Do you want to link or something?"

Write W-Y-D...

W-Y-D.

Space.

- Space.
- Safe.

- S-A-F-E?
- Yeah.

- "WYD safe."
- Yeah.

- Send that, yeah?
- Yeah.

- Sent.
- Sick.

No, the intro, the in...

Shh, just talking on the intro.

♪ It's the MC GRINDAH

♪ Featuring... SHIRO

♪ Let's go

♪ One, two, three, let's go!

You.

Oh, fucking hell.

Start again. You've missed the drop.
Start again.

Stop. Start again.

Shh. You missed the drop.

Oh, she's replied.

Oh, sick. What'd she say?

- Uh, question mark.
- Ooh.

- That's good.
- Is that good?

Do a question mark back.

Sick.

♪ It's the MC GRINDAH

♪ Alongside man like SHIRO

♪ And we're ready to roll right now

♪ Why?

♪ We got the lyrical flow right now

GO!

♪ With the lyrical, biblical
sound, sound, sound

♪ When I pick up the mic, I get down

♪ Say, oh, I get back up
all ready to bounce...

♪ Bass, lyrical shout, lyrical shout

♪ Down with the roughneck vibe

♪ Bass, lyrical shout, went up on left

♪ Then I bring it back to the right

Obviously go, then, if I've stopped.

Fucking hell.

- Just sing. Sing.
- Sing?

Steves.

- Is everything Okay?
- Yeah, yeah, just, um...

- Normal. Yeah.
- Um, I don't know what this text means.

Uh, I just wanted to come
and, um, speak to you,

'cause obviously we've been...

And... I guess, um...

What I'm trying to say is that you're...

- weird and...
- What?

And I'm leaving, so it's, um...

Just wanted to come to say that, really,
and just see, um...

What do you think about that?

I don't know. I'm a bit confused.

- Yeah, I'm-I'm...
- Yeah.

Confused, as well,
but it's just, I guess...

I- I feel like, for me, um...

I feel like I'm doing
all the talking at the moment,

and just, like, maybe it'd be good
if you just said something just to...

help.

Okay, um, um...

I'm not sure what you're trying to say.

I'm trying to say that I'm a man,
and what are you saying?

- About...
- I-I don't know.

Okay, well, you don't know.
That's fair enough.

- What do you mean?
- I'll just, um...

I've obviously embarrassed myself,
as usual, SO...

- All right.
- S-Steves, uh...

I'll see you later.

It's that way, innit?

How far are we from the place?

- Uh, in five minutes.
- Right.

- Right.
- Yes.

Is that Japanese time or UK time?

What's the difference?

Well, there's a seven-hour
time difference, isn't there?

Five...

Just classic five minutes, is it?

- Normal five minutes.
- Yeah. Normal.

- Normal. Right, okay.
- Yeah.

- So that's quite soon. Great.
- So... so, English.

Exciting.

- Smile.
- Oh, for fuck...

Smile! Go on.

Aw.

To be honest, yeah, like,

I had a different view
of what fame would be like.

Like, I always thought fame
would just be, like, me and my boys,

yeah, on a private jet, blazing zoots,
going out to every country

and spitting
the finest UKG lyrics, yeah?

- Now what?
- Okay, now look a bit stronger

and prouder and happier.

It turns out fame is, um,
me and Miche, mainly,

and Taka making me do weird shit.

Fuck's sake.

That's... I'm on the flyer.

Fuck's sake. Why have I got
a guitar in my hand, yeah?

You got it?

Bubby. Okay.

Oh, my God. Look.

- "Bang Boys dressing room."
- Yeah.

Do you want to say it?

Why? It just says it there.

Sausage rolls.

Yeah. Me and Beats used
to insist on them for the rider, so...

Well, more for you now, so, you know,

- that's one of the perks of them going.
- Yeah. Yeah.

Why are all the boys
still On the poster?

Yes, I'm glad you asked, GRINDAH-San,
because we've got a little surprise.

- MIKI. MIKI.
- Yes?

- Go and get the guys.
- Yes.

The guys? Are you joking?

You little bastard!

You bastard!

- Did you know about this?
- Oh, my God.

- No. The big reunion.
- Yes, you did.

- You lot knew about this, innit?
- Oh, my God!

Oh, my days.
We're all gonna be on stage together.

- Yes, all four of you.
- Oh, my God, you've been so worried.

- And you didn't need to panic.
- I know.

The Bang Boys.

What the fuck is that?

It's just their heads.

Yes, we were gonna go
with even bigger heads,

but we thought we'd keep it subtle.

How is that subtle?
Look at the size of that.

Hajimemashite.

- They're cute, aren't they?
- No, they're not cute.

Decoy hasn't even got an Afro
in real life.

I know, but we thought it made him look
more cool and hip-hop this way.

Hip...? It's not meant to be hip-hop,
for fuck's sake.

We got you a foam head as well,
if you want.

Bubby? Are you sulking?

So cool!

Amazing.

You okay, hon?

I'm not okay. This is mad.

- Come On, you were born to do this.
- This ain't how I imagined it, though.

But you're gonna be amazing.
You're just nervous.

It's not nerves. It's just...

It's just this. What the fuck is this?

Come on, let's look excited
for a pic-pic.

Just do that... Bubby.

Okay, I'll just get you
walking Off for now.

Really good emotion.

What's this? What's going on?

♪ Bang, lyrical blow to the jaw

♪ Bang, lyrical blow to the jaw...

Bang Boys? What's he done to them?!

That bloody bastard benchod!

Oi!

Oh, I'll tell you what, yeah?

If I can fire myself,
I can bloody hire myself, too!

I'm coming, boys!

Clap your hands!

- Come On!
- Yeah! Tokyo!

Whoo!

Tokyo!

- Tokyo.
- Where's GRINDAH?

Oh, he's getting changed. Why? Why?

He's in the bathroom.

He won't come out.

What song we doing?

"Dry Your Eyes" by The Streets.

GRINDAH would love this.

Gold mic as well.

♪ Ln one single moment

♪ Your whole life can turn around

♪ I stand there for a minute

♪ Staring straight at the ground

♪ Looking to the left slightly

♪ Then looking back down

♪ World feels like it's caved in

♪ Proper sorry frown

♪ Please let me show you

♪ How we could only just be for us

♪ I can change, I can grow
or we can adjust

♪ The wicked thing about us
is we always have trust

♪ We can even have
an open relationship if we must

♪ I look at her,
she stares almost straight

♪ Back at me

♪ Her eyes glaze over

♪ She's looking straight through me

♪ Then her eyes must have closed

♪ For what seems an eternity

♪ When, um, they open up

♪ She's looking down at her feet

♪ Dry your eyes, mate

♪ I know it's hard to take

♪ But her mind has been made up

♪ There's plenty more fish in the sea

♪ Dry your eyes, mate

♪ I know you want to make her see

♪ How much this pain hurts

♪ But you've got to walk away now

♪ It's over

Bubby.

Bubby? Bubby, are you okay?

Bubby?

I'm staying here
till everyone's gone away.

Bubby.

Bubby, it's just...
um, just me talking to you, okay?

We don't have time.

I can hear people whispering.
Who's that?

- It's Taka and, um...
- Oh, great.

The-the girl that follows you round.

Uh...

- Shit. Hi.
- Hi.

I'm manager of the Bang Boys.

Uh, I need to come in.

Uh... oh.

Th-This for Taka. He forget. Ha!

- Taka?
- Taka, yes.

It's his. I need to come in.

- Yes? Very good.
- Okay.

Listen, mate, yeah?

The music industry
is filled with snakes, okay?

And if you give these snakes
too much control,

they'll ruin everything, okay?

They don't know about music.

They haven't even got ears.
They're snakes.

- I don't want it anymore.
- No, I'm not.

- I don't want any of this.
- Beats and everyone else...

- I want Beats!
- They don't like you anymore.

No, I don't like you anymore!

You know what, though? We are here.

Come On, quickly.
Boys, boys, I'm here! Sorry!

Where are they? Where are they?

Oh, God. Sausage rolls.

They've definitely been here.

Oh, I'm starving as well.

All right, come, come.

♪ She brings her hands up
towards where my hands rested

♪ She wraps her fingers round mine
with the softness she's blessed with

♪ She peels away my fingers,
looks at me and then gestures

♪ By pushing my hand away
to my chest from hers

♪ Dry your eyes, mate

♪ I know it's hard to take

♪ But her mind has been made up...

Hey! Where are the boys?!

I demand to speak to my clients.
I don't care what you say, Taka.

I'm not leaving
till I've spoken to them!

They've all quit
apart from GRINDAH, babe.

- What?
- Yeah.

Right, okay, well, then I demand
to speak to Tony, then.

No, he's locked himself in the toilet.
We can't get him out.

Okay, Tony... Get out the way.

- Please let us in! I'm worried!
- Okay.

Okay, Tony, I'm coming in. Stand back!

Oh, where is he? His clothes.

Shit. Tony?!

- Tony!
- Bubby!

♪ But we've got to walk away now

♪ It's over

Sorry if I was a bit flat
with some of the...

That performance was great, mate.

Felt like I went a bit high-pitched
with some of it.

Really good performance.

His clothes are here. He must be naked.
He's gonna get hypothermia.

No, he was wearing other clothes.

Bubby?

You've fucked up now, haven't you, Taka?
You dickhead. Huh?

See?! See what happened?!

Oh, how the tide has changed!

How the tide has changed!

Let's go for a more up-tempo one now.

- Yeah?
- Yeah.

Shall I do the...?

♪ Turn around

♪ every now and then
I get a little bit lonely

♪ And you're never coming round

♪ Turn around

♪ every now and then
I get a little bit tired

♪ Of listening to the sound of my tears

♪ Turn around

♪ every now...

GRINDAH.

Beats.

You're back.

If you'll have me.

Yeah, of course I'll have you.

It's good to have you back.

I don't want to do this music shit
without you, man.

Same.

Kurupt FM, yeah?

The rest are irrelevant.

Feels good.

How did you know where we were, man?

I...

I knew you wanted to do karaoke, so...

Yeah. But how did you know which one?

Like, there's thousands of them here.

- Yeah, I... Well, I texted Decoy.
- Oh.

I'm sorry.

You're the best thing
that's ever happened to me.

Same.

Uh, where's-where's Miche?

Oh, yeah.

I should probably text her,
let her know.

What's happened, Taka? Huh?

Yeah, but...

- What's he saying?
- He's saying we can do it without him.

You can't do it without GRINDAH.
That's his group, hon.

- Yeah.
- Your husband is replaceable.

Are you joking me?
You do not disrespect my family.

I don't care who you think you are.

- You do not disrespect my family.
- Don't-don't do that.

Is he saying something else
about my family?

'Cause I will slap him.
Did you hear what I said?

- He said GRINDAH needs to be Onstage.
- Yeah, he does need to be on the stage.

GRINDAH will never be on your stage.
You know what, Taka?

You're lucky
I don't lick you clean out, mate.

Shit manager.

- Come on.
- What did you say?

I told him that Taka knows
the dance routine.

- Fuck Taka!
- Fuck Taka!

Ahh!

Hang On.
I missed what happened there.

Nah.

You sure you spelt Kurupt properly?

- Yeah. Yeah.
- With a "K." Yeah.

- They ain't got it.
- Oh, for fuck's sake.

Um...

Try "Bang Boys."

Oh, my days. Bruv, we're on karaoke.

Oh, my days. Steves!

- Bruv, we're in the karaoke machine.
- That is nuts, bruv!

It's not easy managing Kurupt.

I've lost, I mean,
roughly around seven K.

And, uh, deep, deep, deep in the red.

Deep.

And it made me realize
that, God, I'm a good friend.

Because any...

sane manager would have quit
a long time ago, but not me.

I'm loyal.

CHABUDDY G, not the best manager,

but the best friend
you will ever have in your life.

Hey, boys!

- Hey!
- Hey!

Guess who defeated Taka

- and rescued the fair maiden!
- Yeah!

- That's mental.
- Innit?

- I love you. Oh!
- Oh, uh... Oh.

- You all right?
- Yes. And you?

- You came.
- Yeah.

Uh, chicken nugget or anything or...

- Yes, thank you.
- Uh...

- Deeky, man, bring it in.
- What are you doing?

Oh, my God,
you're on the karaoke!

- Yeah.
- That's mental!

- We're in the karaoke machine.
- That's cool.

- Kurupt FM?
- Look.

- ♪ GRINDAH...
- What?

♪ Bang, lyrical blow to the jaw

♪ Bang, lyrical blow to the jaw

♪ Bang, lyrical blow to the jaw

♪ Leaving every MC down on the floor

♪ Bang, lyrical blow to the jaw

♪ Bang, lyrical blow to the jaw

♪ Bang, lyrical blow to the jaw

♪ Leaving every MC down on the floor

♪ Call 999, it's an emergency

♪ Beats and GRINDAH killed an MC

♪ Someone take him to A&e

♪ And perform some lyrical surgery

♪ Bang, lyrical blow to the jaw

♪ Bang, lyrical blow to the jaw

♪ Bang, lyrical blow to the jaw

- Whoo!
- ♪ Leaving every MC down on the floor

♪ Bang, lyrical blow to the jaw

♪ Bang, lyrical blow to the jaw

♪ Bang, lyrical blow to the jaw

♪ Leaving every MC down on the floor

♪ With bandaged knuckles
I dipped 'em in glass

♪ Leaving the MC up on their arse

♪ Lyrical dragon punch so damn fast

♪ Leave your head spinning
for more than my bars

♪ Beats and GRINDAH up on the track

♪ Guess you could call that
double impact

♪ Why are we so lyrically big?

♪ 'Cause we've been training

♪ Punching a tree for a week!

- Oh, my days.
- Oh, my God!

Make some noise!

When I say "Kurupt," you say "FM!"

- Kurupt!
- FM!

- Kurupt!
- FM!

- Kurupt!
- FM!

Kurupt FM!

Deeky, shall we do a duet?

- A love ballad?
- Yeah, go On.

- Go, Deeky.
- Oh, no, man.

Um...

Chabuds and Deeky back-to-back.

- Um, I want to sing...
- I was gonna...

- Oh.
- Oh...

- You... NO...
- You... you go ahead.

- You go ahead. Yeah.
- Uh, Okay.

I was just gonna say, can I lips you?

- If that's... if you want.
- Uh, I...

- But you don't have to.
- I don't know what that means.

Oh, great. So I've literally
embarrassed myself again.

Um, yeah, uh, it means,
"Can I kiss you?"

But, obviously,
the moment's sort of gone now.

Oh. Oh, my God.

Look at Steves
thinking he can lips!

- That is great!
- Love is in the air, mate!

Steves, you dirty bastard!

Thank you.

- Can we... can we do more?
- Sure.

That's my Stevie boy. That's my Steves.

The little things in life
are the most important.

Like, if you start thinking too big,

you realize the world's ending, like,

everything's completely pointless.

Ah!

Focus on just enjoying
the things around you that are good,

like your mates,
like make music, make art,

make a fucking spaghetti Bolognese,
whatever you make.

Do something for someone else.
Make them a fucking spaghetti Bolognese.

Yeah, drink! I want a drink!

That's mine. That's mine. Cheers.

You know, obviously,
we've been trying

for a long time now
for his fame to sort of birth.

Have they got other drinks? I love you.

But he'll probably go back
to postman stuff, as well.

That's fine 'cause, you know,
he can dream still.

He can be a postman in the day,

and he can dream
about being a pop star at night.

And that's our life,
and I'm happy with it.

I just wanted to say I'm sorry, brother.

- Listen, it's water off a ducky's back.
- All right?

Water off a ducky's back, mate.

- Cheers, mate.
- NO problem.

I'll tell you what,
Chabuddy's a hustler.

And you can't hustle a hustler.
I'm CHABUDDY G.

The thing with Taka, yeah,
is that he's a Salaryman.

You know what I mean? Robot.

Oh, wake up, have my, uh, coffee,

go to work, pay my taxes, die.

Me, I've never received a salary
in my life, mate.

I've never been paid for anything
in my whole life.

Think about that, mate.

Stevie! Stevie!

A lot of people have bad things
to say about going away.

They say, "Oh, it's expensive."

"Oh, it's a long flight."

But I tell you what,
get out your comfort zone.

- Yeah. Yeah.
- Go somewhere, like, different.

Do you know what I mean?
'Cause do you know what?

You might not enjoy it at the time,
yeah?

- You won't.
- You won't. No one...

You don't enjoy things in the moment.
That's a fact.

- So you didn't enjoy it?
- No.

- But...
- But that's the whole point, innit?

- But I fucking loved it.
- Exactly.

- Do you know what I mean?
- Yeah.

- No, I didn't enjoy it, but...
- Yeah. But I loved it.

After it was done.

So go and do it.

You'll fucking love it.

- Oh, yeah!
- Kurupt FM.

The rest are irrelevant, like.

Always and forever, the
brothers. Do you know what I'm saying?

The Kurupt FM brothers, man. You get me?

That is what I'm saying, brother!

What's mad is, yeah,
is that after all of this,

GRINDAH put it in perspective for me
that it was just all my fault.

- And that's, like...
- Do you know what I'm saying?

Sometimes I can't even see
where I'm going wrong.

- Yeah, yeah, yeah.
- Like, it's...

But sometimes you need that.

It was just... I don't know how it was
my fault, but somehow it was, wasn't it?

- Yeah, yeah, yeah.
- You were saying last night.

- And I just want to apologize.
- Yeah. NO, it's all good.

NO need to apologize.
I mean, and I apologize...

- But I am sorry.
- No, no, but I apologize

for not explaining that to you earlier.

Yeah. It kind of makes a little...

- Perfect sense. Yeah.
- Yeah.

Or a little bit of perfect sense,
I guess.

- Yeah.
- Yeah.

Subtitles: IYUNO-SDI GROUP