All language subtitles for Grand Crew s01e02 Wine & Serendipity.eng

- Okay, so we all like
this bar,

and we're all interested

in getting more into wine.

Agreed?
all: Agreed.

- Well, I think to ensure that
this remains the go-to spot,

we need to set
some ground rules.

I'll go first.

Ground rule number one,

Noah cannot date
anybody that works here.

- Okay.
Okay, yeah, I can do that.

- Ground rule number two,
Noah cannot introduce himself

to anyone who works here.

It's a slippery slope.
- Mm-hmm.

- Then the bartenders are
gonna think I'm mean.

- Okay,
then just the tip them more.

Ooh, I got one.

Ground rule number three,
Noah can't even date

anyone in the immediate area,

'cause that'll prevent
awkward run-ins.

- How are we defining
the immediate area?

- Fantastic question.

Ground rule number four,

the immediate area
is a one-mile radius.

- For real?
- Yes.

- I like that.
- Come on, y'all.

Can we please make up a ground
rule about someone else?

- Okay,
this one's for all of us.

Ground rule number five,
if anybody complains

about the ground rules,
they got to buy a round.

- That's it right there.
- I see what you did there.

- But no one else
is gonna complain

because all the ground rules
are about me.

- Sounds like
a complaint to me.

- Damn it,
I just bought this round.

- Another complaint,
another round.

- This is unfair.
- Another one.

- I'm gonna stop
because I cannot afford this.

It's just that y'all--
all: Another one.

- ♪ Whoop, whoop

♪ Cabernet and sauvignon

♪ Team is here
and now it's on ♪

♪ Carry on and Carignan,
sippin' on Perignon ♪

♪ Fine wine,
got notes like a cello ♪

♪ Pull up in the spot
like hello ♪

♪ If you got me,
then I got you ♪

♪ This is the vibe,
this is the crew ♪

♪ Grand crew, grand crew, uh

♪ Grand crew, grand crew,
grand crew, uh ♪

♪ Grand crew

[laughter, chatter]

- Okay,
I'd like to make a toast.

Alicia is gone and in her stead
is the mythical, single Noah,

a creature not seen
in many moons.

Bask in this moment,

for soon he shall return
to his true form,

Monogamous Man.

- Monogamous Man.

- Very funny, but, you know,
I've been single before,

and I'm not always
looking for love.

- Okay, stop the show.
I'm your sister.

I've seen you in the tub.
- What's that mean?

- We were bucky
as babies together.

I know your truth.

You are always
trying to be boo'd up.

That's why you are so obsessed
with rom-coms.

You think
they're how life should be.

- So what?
I may prefer companionship,

and I have a taste
for romantically-based films.

What is so bad about that?

- Remember your
"Love & Basketball" fiasco?

- I'll play you.
- For what?

- Your heart.

[hip-hop music]

- It's over!

Get out of my life!

- She was a starter for UConn.

What were you thinking?

- That love would win
in the end.

- You're dumb.

You need to stop
looking for love

every second of the day.

You need to learn
how to love yourself.

You know what you need.
- What?

- Self-care.

- I self-care constantly.

- You do?
- Yeah, I do.

As a matter of fact,
I'm taking myself out

to lunch tomorrow.

Just me and an empty seat
across from the table.

And you know what?
I was thinking

I'll maybe even do a Sudoku.

[all oohing]

- What up, what up, my family?

[all greeting]

What's going on?

Oh.

Anthony.

- Sherman.

- What was that?
- Explain that.

- I'm just saying hey
to my friend.

- Nah, look at your posture.
Y'all are too erect.

Something's up.
- Fine.

This afternoon, I caught
Anthony here in the bathroom.

- Naked?
- Worse.

- Oh, God.
Are you crying?

- [sniffles]
Look away.

- I don't understand.
So crying is worse

than seeing
someone's genitalia?

- Way worse.
He saw my emotional genitalia.

It's one thing
to cry on your own,

but in front of the homey?

Nah.
Real Gs cry in silence.

- Back up.
Why were you crying?

- I had just watched
"Paddington 2."

- The kid's movie
with the talking bear?

both: It has adult themes.
- Thank you, Noah.

That damn bear really made me
feel some things.

- Y'all are being ridiculous.
This is silly.

- Man, you ain't seen
what I've seen.

Can't shake the sight.

Those bare,
glistening, wet cheeks

on his face.

- You said
they weren't that wet.

- I lied.

[groovy beat]

- Noah.
- Nicky.

Hi. What are you doing here?

- Well, I was in the area.
I remembered your little lunch.

I figured I'd drop by
and say hi.

Hi.
- Aww.

That's really nice of you.

Um, I would offer you a seat,

but unfortunately, I'm here
on a date, uh, with myself.

Let me introduce you.
Myself, Nicky.

Nicky, myself.
- Drop the act.

You're here
trying to meet a girl.

- No, the only person
I'm interested in meeting

is a better me.

What are you doing?
- Sherlocking your ass.

You got a weathered moleskin
to make yourself seem artistic,

an untouched salad to indicate
healthy eating habits,

a summer scarf
to project wealth and class.

Oh, we got a book.

"She Comes First" to indicate
unselfish bedroom habits.

- So what?
I did all that stuff for me.

- Of course, that makes sense.
- Yeah, right?

It does
- Then explain this.

A strategically placed
driver's license on the ground

in hopes that a beautiful woman
will pick it up

and return it to you.

Admit it.
You're not self-caring.

Your meet-cuteing.
Ha-ha.

[in British accent]
You've been caught, sir.

- Fine!
You got me.

What do you want me to say,
that I came here

looking for love,
and I can't help myself?

But you know what?

I don't regret it.
I would do it again if I could.

It makes me feel alive.
- Oh, no, no.

Noah.
Look at yourself.

All of this, ooh.

It's really sad.
- Oh, please.

You're making me sound
like I'm crazy.

I am fine.
- Hi, I think you dropped--

- That's not meant for you!

♪

- Sherm.
- Anthony.

Why is it that every time
I open a damn door,

you're on the other side?

- Wyatt asked me to help put
together some new furniture.

- Same.
Well, where is he, then?

- Uh, he said
he was running behind.

He'd be out on a few.

- Word.

- So nice weather today.
- Yeah.

- Like, 72 degrees.
- Mm.

- 30% humidity, partly cloudy--

- Look, man,
this is awkward as hell.

I'ma go to the bathroom.

When I come back,
try not to be so damn weird.

- How do I do that?
- I don't know!

Just try it.

- [crying]

[both scream]

- Not again.
More crying?

- Don't look at my face.

- Oh, no.

- Don't look at my face.

- A rose for the lady.

- Oh, got the whole waitstaff
in on it not too, eh?

- Benjamin is rooting for me,
unlike somebody I know.

- Noah, life isn't a rom-com.

If anything,
it is a psychological thriller

where at every corner,
someone's trying to trick you

or kill you.

- Ah, but you're
not exactly an expert

on successful relationships
or love

with those walls of yours.

- [scoffs]
Please, I've had plenty

of successful relationships.

- Oh, have you?
- Yes.

- What about Marcellus?
He treated you great.

- He ate crunchy peanut butter.
He was literally insane.

- Huh, okay, but also,
most of your friendships

have only lasted
a matter of weeks.

Remember Tasha?
- She moved away.

She gave me no choice.

- She moved to West LA.

- It's a 50-minute ride
in traffic.

She gave me no choice.

Look, I just want you
to be happy,

and I can tell that you're not.

Lest we forget,
I've seen you in the tub.

- Please stop saying that.
It is so gross.

- You can't do it, can you?

You can't exist
without trying to find love.

- That's ridiculous.
Of course I can.

- Then let me show you
some real self-care

where you focus on yourself
before trying

to find somebody else.

And if you don't feel better,

you can go back
to living out your failed

straight-to-streaming
rom-com plots.

- Okay.
All right, I--

I suppose that couldn't hurt.

- Thank you.

The first stop
in our self-care journey

is diving
into an elegant art form.

- Pole dancing?
- Yeah.

Self-care's all about
loving yourself,

and I never love myself more

than when I'm freaking it
on the pole...for me.

- Brother and sister pole
dancing together feels weird.

- What's weird about it?
It's just like

a normal form of exercise.

- Hi, everyone.
I'm Blair Saddles.

And for all my first-timers,
just know that this class

is exactly like sex.

.

- That was hard,
but surprisingly

pretty great,
I'm not gonna lie.

Even though it did get kind of
weird during your solo routine.

- What was weird?

[hip-hop music]

- Yes, yes!
[cheers]

- I was working
on that move for weeks.

All you were looking at
was some hard work

and determination, okay?

- Okay, respect to you

and all your hard twerk.

[both laugh]

Oh.
- Oh.

[romantic music]

- Hey, I'm sorry about that.

- You're stepping on my foot
and I can't move.

- Oh, my bad.

- We're going.
We're leaving.

- Okay, okay.
- We're leaving.

- Man, what the hell
did I just walk in on?

- Anthony had mentioned
"Paddington 2,"

so I had to see
what all the fuss was about,

and that damn bear played
a tune on my heartstrings.

- It's an emotional
masterpiece.

- Okay, but why was you
butt-ass naked, man?

- I cried so much
that my clothes got soaked.

- Huh?
- I said I cried so much

that my clothes got soaked!

- [laughing]
- Man, why are you laughing?

- I just remembered you saying
we were being ridiculous.

- That was before Sherm saw
my big juicy ducts.

And just so you know, my tears
are not usually that thick.

- Okay.
Whatever.

Can we just not talk
about it anymore, please?

- Yeah, yeah, we should just
build the furniture, yeah?

- Nah, I think we should go
our separate ways.

- Dope, I'm down to leave.
- Yep, yep. Me too.

- Awesome, bye.

[mellow music plays]

♪

- What's up with you, Noah?

- Ah, just thinking
about this girl I met earlier.

There was a spark.
It's like time stood still.

- No, you stood still
on that poor girl's foot.

There was no spark.

Your heart is like
a gas station bathroom,

open 24 hours
and an absolute mess.

- My heart is not
like a bathroom.

- It's a dirty bathroom,
and clearly,

you need more self-care

'cause we haven't broken
this sappy cycle.

- Hey, Nicky.
Hey, Noah.

Wyatt, Anthony.

both: Sherman.
- Okay.

What the hell's going on
with you three now?

- We don't wanna talk about it.
- I saw Wyatt naked crying.

both: What?
- "Paddington 2."

Wet clothes from the tears.

- Ah, been there.

- Paddington ain't nothing

but a Black man trying
to do his best.

- Mm-hmm.
- So let me get this straight.

The three of you are
just gonna be, like,

really weird all the time.

Y'all are grown-ass children.

- You know what?
Nicky's right.

We're being immature.
We can be adults about this.

We need to make Sherman cry.

- Huh?
- What?

- Don't you see our dynamic
as friends

is hanging off a cliff
by two fingers?

Things will never be the same

if we don't restore
the balance.

- That's right.

He's seen
our emotional genitalia.

Now it's time we see his.

- Sorry, fellas,
but I do not cry.

Even when I was born,
the doctors thought I was dead

because I wouldn't cry,
no matter how many times

they slapped my ass.

I just took it like a G.
- Oh, we'll see.

Because I'm still
within a 48-hour rental period

of a pretty emotional movie.

- Oh, my God.

That "Paddington" was
truly heartwarming.

But not warm enough.

- Who hurt you?

- Welcome to the next stage
of self-care:

positive reinforcements.

We're gonna do
some affirmations.

- Cool, from, like, a book
or something?

- Nah,
these are Nicky originals.

I record them all the time.
Just repeat the phrases.

I am sexy.
I am sultry.

I am sent from heaven.

both: I am sexy.
I am sultry.

I am sent from heaven.

[bicycle bell rings]

[romantic music]

- Is that that girl again?

- I need you to focus up.

No. Focus up.

I'm a strong Black woman.

both: I'm a strong Black woman.

- Yes.

And after doing
my affirmations,

this is where I come
for stress relief.

- Yeah, I was thinking more

massage tables
and essential oils.

- Okay, well,
the axe is essential

for chopping through the BS.

Self-care, bitch!

- Yeah!
- Ah!

- Yeah!

[romantic music]

Chop-chop!

And here it is,
the final boss level

of self-care, the mall.

You want a manicure?
Ooh, baby, we got it.

You want a new car?

We got that too,
for some reason.

What are you looking at?

- There she is again.

♪

- Are you [bleep] kidding me?

.

- Ooh, yes.
This screams,

"I am ready to be single
for more than a second."

- Come on, Nicky.

How is it possible
that we've seen

the same woman
everywhere we go?

- I see the same Black people
all the time on the Eastside.

There's only
so many of us over here.

- You're not seeing
what's happening

because you have
a giant block of ice

where your heart should be.

- Oh, okay, well, you have

a giant Nicholas Sparks novel

with two white people
on the cover

where your heart should be.

Wait, Noah,
are you planting your ID again?

- No, this isn't mine.

Oh, crap. It's girl.

- Girl who?

- "Girl from everywhere" girl.

Don't you see?
It's another sign.

Her name is Fay.
Fay.

Short for fate.

We got to get this back to her
before she gets on that plane.

- Wait, what plane?
- There's always a plane.

Come on, Nicky,
even you have to admit

there's been too many moments
to ignore.

- Okay, I'll admit there's
been a few coincidences.

- So you're on board?
- I'm not on board.

At best, I'm on the dock
watching you drown.

But if you wanna go after her,
go after her.

- [sighs]
You're supposed to say,

"Go to her."

- I don't talk like that.

[hip-hop beat]

- It's time to see
those tears, Sherm.

- Fellas, this is
a fool's errand,

and y'all are the fools.

You've tried every sad movie
you can think of.

And don't get me wrong.

When Will Smith was
pursuing his happiness,

it got me in the gut,
just not in my eye-guts.

- Okay,
so movies don't make you cry,

but you know what might?

A reunion with an old friend.

One you haven't seen
in ten years.

- Ron Ron?
- Hey, Sherm.

- You punk-ass bitch.
- Oh, hey!

- Hey, what's going on?
- This dude owes me money.

That's why I ain't seen him
in ten years.

- But you always talking about

how you wish
you could see him again.

- Yeah,
so I could get my damn cash.

I should bop you in the lip.

- Oh, so you wanna boogie bop?

- Yeah, let's bop the boogie.

- Whoa, whoa, whoa--
- Hey, hey, fellas!

Fellas, come on now.
We're supposed to be brothers.

- Why you got to be
like that, man?

I got your cash
right here, man.

- It's about damn time.

- Look, I'm sorry.

I miss you, man.

I want my friend back, man.

[jaunty music]

- Oh, no, Ron Ron.
Not you.

- Damn, Ron Ron.

- I'm making fusilli tonight
in a cream sauce.

Get his ass out of here.

- We've looked all over, Noah.

I don't think
she's here anymore.

- No, no, no.
We can't give up.

If I've learned anything
from rom-coms,

it's that this is the moment

that she should
just suddenly appear.

- Holy crap.
You're right.

- I am?
- Yes.

- I am!
- Yes.

- Aw, man,
but she's on the move.

[Hall & Oates'
"You Make My Dreams"]

- I have an idea.

Come on, come on, come on.

Sir, excuse me.
Sir, we need your golf cart.

- Yes.
- The hell you talking about?

I'm not gonna give you
my golf cart.

- It's for love.

- We'll give you money.

- Well, why didn't you say so?

Go get her.

- Thank you, sir.
- Thank you.

- Um, excuse me.
[horn honks]

- Whoa, whoa!
- Hey!

- Pardon me.
- [screams]

- Whoa, whoa, whoa!

- [whimpering]
Ah!

- That one's on you.

We weren't even
anywhere near you.

- ♪ Yeah, yeah

♪ You make my dreams
come true ♪

- Damn it.
Where is she?

- There she is.

- Come on, let's move.
- Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah.

- There she is!
- Thank God.

- ♪ You make my dreams
come true ♪

- ♪ Ooh, ooh, ooh, ooh
- ♪ Me, you, me, you, me

- You got a problem, buddy?

[hip-hop music]

- Oh, Sherman!

- What are y'all doing now?
- You left us no choice

but to burn
your favorite pair of sneakers.

- Are y'all for real?

- There's a tear.
We have a tear.

- Ha, we did it!
- We have a tear!

- We did it!
- We got a tear, mm.

- Sucker.

Yo--yo, Sherm, you good?

- Burning my shoes
is messed up,

but that's not why I'm crying.

Those were my Uncle Malcolm's.

He was an important figure
for me growing up.

He took me in when my dad
moved to Washington,

and he helped me
get back on track

when I was skipping school
and smoking joints.

[soft music]

He was always on me
to do the right thing.

I guess he's gone for good now.

♪

- Hey, guys,
I'd like to make a toast.

To life, an ugly beast

that is only interested
in eating you alive.

- Oh, I'll drink to that.

- Sherm, we're really so--
- Shh.

- Okay, the energy here
is extra funky.

Noah, you need to cheer up.
Everything's gonna be okay.

- No.
The world isn't a rom-com.

You were right.

- Or was I?

[The Cranberries' "Linger"]

♪

- It's fate.
I mean, Fay.

I can't believe she's here.

- Well, I did
some Internet sleuthing.

I tracked her down,
sent her a text message,

and said, "Come on down
and pick up your ID."

Well, what are you waiting for?
This is your big moment.

Go to her.

- Go to her.

You said it.

- Go. Go.

- There you are again.

- Again?
Who are you?

[music distorts and stops]

- Uh...

- Can you tell
what's going on with Noah?

'Cause I can't hear anything.

- No, I'ma get closer.

- I'm sorry.
Let me back up.

I am the person
who found your ID.

- No, the person
who found my ID is a woman.

- Yes, but I was with her.

I'm the guy
from all those run-ins.

I stepped on your foot
at the pole dancing studio.

- Oh, you're the dude
who stomped on my foot.

- Yes, that was me.

I mean, we--
we had a moment, right?

- No.
- Well, maybe I misread things,

but you have to admit
it was kind of weird

that we kept seeing
each other everywhere.

- Not really.
I see the same Black people

all the time on the Eastside.

There's only so many of us.
- I say the same thing.

Especially at the mall.

- Oh, I know, right?
That's my favorite place.

both:
I'd lived there if I could.

- Whoa.
Did we just become friends?

- I think so.
- Hi, I'm Nicky.

I'm the one who texted you.

- Oh, you're the one
who found my ID.

- Well--
- You look so familiar.

Were you at the pole dancing
studio yesterday?

- Mm-hmm.
- And the park?

- I was there too.
- Again,

I really don't remember you.

[slow hip-hop beat]

- Sherm, we need to talk.

Da, da, da, da!
Just hear us out.

We messed up.

We were insecure
about our emotions

and we projected that onto you
and we took it too far.

- Yeah, way too far.

We hope this will
make up for it.

- [laughs]
You got--

[continues laughing]

- What's going on?
- Oh, man, I got y'all.

Man, y'all were
losing your minds

and I wanted you to stop,

so I made
that whole sob story up

in the moment.

- Oh, my God.

- [echoing]
Those were my Uncle Malcolm's.

An important figure for me.

My dad moved to Washington.

Skipping school
and smoking joints.

And smoking joints.

Making sure
I do the right thing in life.

Do the right thing in life.

- Wow, you really didn't look
around the room at all.

Just that one
"Malcolm X" poster.

- I know.

I'm surprised
you didn't notice.

I mean, come on, man.
I don't smoke joints.

I smoke blunts.

- Wait, what about the tears?

- Oh, the tears?

Fake tears.

Honestly, man, I knew y'all
was gonna give me something,

but I did not expect it to be

these rare-ass Jordan Retros.

These are rare as hell.
Come on, man!

[laughs]

- That's great, Sherman.
You got us.

- Hey, my bad, man.
Look, to be real--

[sighs]
When I was growing up,

my dad was always on me
to man up.

He said that crying
was a weakness.

I never saw him cry,
not even once.

So I just grew up thinking that
that's not what real men do.

I still get emotional,

but I guess I just got
a lot of stuff pent up.

- That was really vulnerable
of you.

Thanks for sharing that.

- I'm not gonna cry.
- And we're fine with that.

But what we're not fine with
is you having these Jordans.

- Hold on, man.
- I was actually

kind of okay with it.

[funky beat]

♪

- Hey, I am sorry
about how things went down.

- Sorry for what?
I couldn't be happier.

- Oh, no.
Your brain broke.

- No, my brain is tip-top.

I just realized

that I wasn't wrong
about the meet-cutes.

All those places were
your favorite places.

You found her ID
and you invited her to the bar.

It was your rom-com all along.

You know, the one
where the closed-off cynic

opens her heart
and finds a new friend.

And it's called "The Perks
of Being a Mallflower."

- I truly cannot believe
we're related,

but I'm glad that we are.

And I guess you kind of sort of
rubbed off on me a little.

- Well, I guess
you kind of sort of

rubbed off on me a little too.

I'm not gonna lie,
self-care is my jam.

- Well, I'm happy you're happy.
- You don't have to say that.

I can always tell
when you're happy.

After all,
I have seen you in a tub.

- Oh.
Don't say that.

That's disgusting.
- Wait, but you said at first.

- Well, it sounds different
when I say it.

- What? How?
- What do you mean how?

- How is it different
when you say it?

- It just sounds
a little bit better--

- We should both
stop saying it.

[Dionne Warwick's
"That's What Friends Are For"]

♪

- ♪ And I never thought
I'd feel this way ♪

♪ And as far
as I'm concerned ♪

♪ I'm glad I got the chance
to say ♪

♪ That I do believe
I love you ♪

♪ For good times
and bad times ♪

♪ I'll be on your side
forevermore ♪

[saxophone riff]
- Yah.

- Not a doctor.
- Shh.

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