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These are the user uploaded subtitles that are being translated: 1 00:01:03,600 --> 00:01:06,527 As long as I can remember, I've had hemorrhoids. 2 00:01:06,710 --> 00:01:09,406 And I've thought for many years, I shouldn't tell this. 3 00:01:09,589 --> 00:01:11,784 Because I associate hemorrhoids only with grandpas. 4 00:01:12,123 --> 00:01:14,668 I saw them as very unfeminine. 5 00:01:42,376 --> 00:01:45,106 Zinc ointment helps against the outer itching. 6 00:01:46,062 --> 00:01:50,441 A hazelnut-sized amount on the finger with the shortest nail. 7 00:01:51,014 --> 00:01:54,749 Then, rub it on the cauliflower, that proliferates down there. 8 00:01:57,426 --> 00:02:02,351 One can also introduce the ointment anal, to still the itching on the inside. 9 00:03:25,844 --> 00:03:28,344 My mother has told me, that it is difficult, 10 00:03:28,531 --> 00:03:30,682 to keep a pussy really clean. 11 00:03:30,911 --> 00:03:34,176 A pussy gets sick a lot easier than a penis. 12 00:03:34,367 --> 00:03:37,174 That is why hygiene in the bathroom has the top priority. 13 00:03:37,361 --> 00:03:40,933 Helen, are you ready? If everything is fresh again? 14 00:03:41,124 --> 00:03:43,552 Almost. 15 00:03:50,338 --> 00:03:52,766 Come on 16 00:04:27,195 --> 00:04:28,428 Jump. 17 00:04:44,395 --> 00:04:47,049 Trust no one. Not even your parents. 18 00:04:49,538 --> 00:04:53,655 It' s better to have a scratched knee now, than to have a broken heart later on. 19 00:04:56,257 --> 00:04:59,752 I do not agree... 20 00:04:59,943 --> 00:05:02,597 with a lot of things that I was taught. 21 00:05:02,938 --> 00:05:04,249 So I subjected myself 22 00:05:04,589 --> 00:05:07,318 to a living pussy hygiene self-experiment. 23 00:05:07,506 --> 00:05:09,472 At a public toilet my mother pees 24 00:05:09,657 --> 00:05:11,502 in a floating squatting position. 25 00:05:11,730 --> 00:05:16,534 I take a lot of pleasure from seating myself fully on the dirty toilet seat. 26 00:05:17,219 --> 00:05:20,867 Then, I wipe the seat clean with my pussy, in a neat circle. 27 00:05:21,060 --> 00:05:23,712 The dirtier the toilet, the better. 28 00:05:24,321 --> 00:05:26,670 I've done this experiment for many years, 29 00:05:26,856 --> 00:05:29,237 and I've never had a single mushroom. 30 00:05:30,044 --> 00:05:32,620 I have a very healthy pussy flora. 31 00:05:36,877 --> 00:05:39,344 Hygiene is a lowercase word to me. 32 00:05:40,677 --> 00:05:43,254 One shouldn't wash one's pussy too much. 33 00:05:44,824 --> 00:05:49,356 My goal is that it can be smelled easily and seductively right through the pants. 34 00:05:50,851 --> 00:05:53,778 Men will then perceive this, unconsciously, 35 00:05:53,999 --> 00:05:56,883 because we are all animals so, who want to mate. 36 00:05:58,337 --> 00:06:01,680 Preferably with people who smell of pussy. 37 00:06:04,750 --> 00:06:06,180 Are you hungry? 38 00:06:07,206 --> 00:06:10,744 The consistency of the pussy-mucus plays a major role. 39 00:06:10,931 --> 00:06:13,006 It is always different. 40 00:06:13,235 --> 00:06:16,161 Sometimes like olive oil, today more like cottage cheese. 41 00:06:16,344 --> 00:06:18,156 Many strongly prefer cottage cheese. 42 00:06:18,340 --> 00:06:21,037 You may not believe me. But it's true. 43 00:06:24,982 --> 00:06:26,019 Taste alright? 44 00:06:37,421 --> 00:06:39,890 - Can I take a picture of you? - Now? 45 00:06:40,109 --> 00:06:42,537 Yes. 46 00:06:49,015 --> 00:06:51,975 Thank you. Looks good. 47 00:06:52,318 --> 00:06:53,901 As if you're dying. 48 00:07:15,007 --> 00:07:16,623 My sex-souvenir candy. 49 00:07:17,426 --> 00:07:21,468 If you find dicks, sperm and other bodily fluids disgusting, 50 00:07:21,650 --> 00:07:24,423 it's better just to leave sex alone. 51 00:07:24,605 --> 00:07:26,571 That, for sure, is not my intention. 52 00:08:32,176 --> 00:08:35,987 Cooking me something? - Nope, I just borrowed the vegetables. 53 00:08:36,207 --> 00:08:38,250 That's Toni, my brother. 54 00:08:38,434 --> 00:08:40,661 As a baby he was always yapping about. 55 00:08:40,852 --> 00:08:45,658 But today he says nothing. Well, only if you touch his teddy bear. 56 00:08:45,882 --> 00:08:47,193 Stop it now! 57 00:08:48,301 --> 00:08:50,146 Everyone needs hobbies. 58 00:08:50,336 --> 00:08:53,525 For me, besides fucking, it' s growing avocado trees. 59 00:08:53,715 --> 00:08:56,566 The seeds are my own little family. 60 00:08:59,089 --> 00:09:01,940 That's mama. She has tried every religious 61 00:09:02,161 --> 00:09:04,815 and spiritual thing there is. 62 00:09:05,308 --> 00:09:06,773 Hallelujah! 63 00:09:13,869 --> 00:09:15,147 After the divorce 64 00:09:15,329 --> 00:09:19,174 she has gone for the most bizarre religion of them all. 65 00:09:19,553 --> 00:09:20,710 Catholicism. 66 00:09:27,385 --> 00:09:30,388 Amen ! 67 00:09:38,095 --> 00:09:40,869 - Hi. - Oh, hi. Neighbors. 68 00:09:41,205 --> 00:09:42,941 - Great. - I'm Corinna. 69 00:09:43,317 --> 00:09:47,161 - Bye, Corinna. - Helen, don't be so rude. 70 00:09:49,345 --> 00:09:51,496 It 's not worth it, get to know us, you know? 71 00:09:51,840 --> 00:09:54,461 Because soon my mother will wink at the next guy. 72 00:09:54,643 --> 00:09:56,488 And we move away again. 73 00:09:56,678 --> 00:09:58,567 - It' s not that bad. - Still is though. 74 00:09:58,943 --> 00:10:03,059 - Yeah, men are not that easy. - We need to be off again. 75 00:10:03,397 --> 00:10:05,471 Otherwise my vegetarian roast will burn. 76 00:10:05,662 --> 00:10:07,398 You can take your mom over sometimes. 77 00:10:07,581 --> 00:10:10,049 Right. We' ll invite all of her ex-lovers. 78 00:10:10,269 --> 00:10:12,846 Then we have a really cozy gangbang evening. 79 00:10:13,225 --> 00:10:15,038 See you soon, take care. 80 00:10:15,797 --> 00:10:18,023 Bye. 81 00:10:18,024 --> 00:10:20,482 Why do you embarrass us like that? What will people think of us? 82 00:10:20,597 --> 00:10:23,981 I have no idea, what Corinna thought about us. 83 00:10:24,320 --> 00:10:26,745 I just know that she will soon be my best friend. 84 00:10:26,931 --> 00:10:31,507 And that she had a knack for always picking the wrong types. 85 00:10:37,681 --> 00:10:41,371 Her last boyfriend was the drummer in a heavy metal band. 86 00:10:46,205 --> 00:10:48,628 As Corinna would soon find out 87 00:10:48,814 --> 00:10:52,626 the drummer had a very special fondness during sex. 88 00:10:56,684 --> 00:10:58,268 I love you. 89 00:11:01,139 --> 00:11:03,600 I love you too. 90 00:11:03,672 --> 00:11:05,561 Can you poop on my stomach? 91 00:11:05,937 --> 00:11:08,365 What? 92 00:11:35,846 --> 00:11:37,385 Corinna did her best. 93 00:11:37,611 --> 00:11:41,303 But the worst thing was that afterwards, everybody knew about it. 94 00:12:38,194 --> 00:12:40,622 Papa? 95 00:12:48,674 --> 00:12:50,632 Papa? 96 00:12:50,633 --> 00:12:52,293 Can I live with you? 97 00:13:14,897 --> 00:13:16,710 Your eggs are burnt. 98 00:13:24,687 --> 00:13:27,155 Hey, why don' t you ring the doorbell? 99 00:13:27,337 --> 00:13:28,487 My dad. 100 00:13:28,488 --> 00:13:30,868 He often hurts me a lot, without realizing it. 101 00:13:46,916 --> 00:13:49,418 To dance so uninhibited you've got 102 00:13:49,603 --> 00:13:52,225 to have a lot of money. Or a big penis. 103 00:13:52,561 --> 00:13:54,406 Or both, like my father. 104 00:14:14,943 --> 00:14:19,289 As a child of divorce I hope, as do almost all children of divorce, 105 00:14:19,474 --> 00:14:21,516 for my parents to get back together. 106 00:14:21,738 --> 00:14:22,889 Why? 107 00:14:22,890 --> 00:14:26,003 Because every child loves his parents unconditionally. 108 00:14:26,192 --> 00:14:28,573 Whether they deserve it or not. 109 00:14:28,764 --> 00:14:30,423 Are you dreaming? 110 00:14:30,952 --> 00:14:32,383 No, I'm thinking. 111 00:14:32,565 --> 00:14:34,792 Abraham! 112 00:14:34,793 --> 00:14:37,827 - Here I am. - Take your son, Isaac, 113 00:14:38,054 --> 00:14:40,053 and take him there. as a burnt offering 114 00:14:40,244 --> 00:14:42,439 - Father? - Yes, my son? 115 00:14:43,085 --> 00:14:44,821 Here is fire and wood. 116 00:14:45,004 --> 00:14:47,733 But where is the lamb, we wanted to sacrifice? 117 00:14:48,075 --> 00:14:50,381 God will choose the sacrificial lamb, my son. 118 00:14:51,070 --> 00:14:52,655 What are you thinking about? 119 00:14:55,523 --> 00:14:57,598 How it' ll be when you're old. 120 00:14:59,210 --> 00:15:00,870 - Ah yes? - Uh-huh. 121 00:15:01,090 --> 00:15:03,166 And how would it be? Good or what? 122 00:15:03,893 --> 00:15:05,204 Do you feel old? 123 00:15:07,616 --> 00:15:09,922 I do not want to talk about it. 124 00:15:12,415 --> 00:15:14,075 - Do you understand? - Uh-huh. 125 00:15:14,259 --> 00:15:17,142 I mean you're old already, but I mean really old. 126 00:15:19,635 --> 00:15:22,057 Are you afraid that I'd die soon? 127 00:15:29,079 --> 00:15:30,508 Do not be afraid. 128 00:15:31,996 --> 00:15:35,644 No. I mean, if you are old and in need of care. 129 00:15:35,989 --> 00:15:38,216 And I have to wash your ass. 130 00:15:39,635 --> 00:15:43,557 I'd do this at home, within the family circle. 131 00:15:44,397 --> 00:15:45,784 What do you think? 132 00:15:46,586 --> 00:15:47,862 I find it... 133 00:15:49,964 --> 00:15:51,079 nice. All right. 134 00:15:52,728 --> 00:15:55,196 And her I'd stuff in a nursing home. 135 00:16:06,089 --> 00:16:07,247 And about me? 136 00:16:08,661 --> 00:16:11,434 I'll lay you down in the same bed as mom. 137 00:16:16,609 --> 00:16:18,072 Until you die. 138 00:16:19,796 --> 00:16:24,250 You'd tie me to the bed with your father, until I die? 139 00:16:29,124 --> 00:16:32,237 After all this man has done to me? 140 00:16:33,962 --> 00:16:36,072 Yes. 141 00:16:36,073 --> 00:16:38,377 How come you want to punish me like that? 142 00:16:40,719 --> 00:16:42,182 Punish? 143 00:16:49,740 --> 00:16:52,438 Sometimes, I just have to wait patiently, 144 00:16:52,621 --> 00:16:54,313 it' s in my hands. 145 00:18:15,241 --> 00:18:18,199 Since I really don't like shaving 146 00:18:18,389 --> 00:18:20,889 I always do it too fast and too hard. 147 00:18:24,608 --> 00:18:27,262 To me, the ass belongs to the domain of sex. 148 00:18:27,488 --> 00:18:30,905 So it is subjected to this modern shaving-duty as well. 149 00:18:33,208 --> 00:18:35,830 Perhaps not everyone knows what an anal fissure is. 150 00:18:36,050 --> 00:18:39,512 This is a small, small crack in the anus. 151 00:18:39,696 --> 00:18:42,809 And you can get it easily. For example, when shaving. 152 00:18:44,764 --> 00:18:49,034 This causes me one of the greatest pains I've ever had. 153 00:19:17,436 --> 00:19:19,020 Ahhh...! 154 00:19:22,734 --> 00:19:25,160 - Hello, my sweetheart. - Hello. 155 00:19:25,999 --> 00:19:27,079 Is everything okay? 156 00:19:27,418 --> 00:19:28,728 Mhm. 157 00:19:28,953 --> 00:19:30,309 - Are you sure? - Uh-huh. 158 00:19:30,489 --> 00:19:32,487 Did you smoke weed? 159 00:19:32,717 --> 00:19:35,144 Okay. 160 00:19:36,171 --> 00:19:37,940 The swollen hemorrhoids 161 00:19:38,129 --> 00:19:40,904 are now pressing full force against my shaving injury, 162 00:19:41,086 --> 00:19:43,205 and let the fissure tear ever further. 163 00:20:13,297 --> 00:20:17,600 On the ass-injury, a bulging blister has formed, 164 00:20:17,827 --> 00:20:19,792 which hangs out of the anus, 165 00:20:19,978 --> 00:20:22,674 like the neck skin of these tropical birds, 166 00:20:23,011 --> 00:20:26,506 when during mating season they pump a lot of air into it. 167 00:20:30,727 --> 00:20:34,614 It must look very inflamed. All who come in say... 168 00:20:34,951 --> 00:20:36,533 Ohh! 169 00:20:40,940 --> 00:20:43,320 I'm Doctor Notz. 170 00:20:43,705 --> 00:20:44,708 Ahhh! 171 00:20:45,469 --> 00:20:47,774 - Oh! - Warn me first, please! 172 00:20:48,118 --> 00:20:49,549 Damn! 173 00:20:50,730 --> 00:20:51,921 What was that? 174 00:20:52,573 --> 00:20:53,927 That was my thumb. 175 00:20:55,989 --> 00:20:57,911 Do you always introduce yourself like that? 176 00:20:58,293 --> 00:21:00,291 Yes I do, imagine that. 177 00:21:01,785 --> 00:21:05,129 No. First of all, with that thick bubble in place I can't see a thing. 178 00:21:05,318 --> 00:21:08,705 And secondly, it presses against the skin lesions and hurts you. 179 00:21:08,889 --> 00:21:11,773 And now it no longer hurts. That's quite a success. 180 00:21:12,114 --> 00:21:14,189 So, gentlemen, what's to be done here? 181 00:21:14,418 --> 00:21:16,963 I think operate, Professor. - I didn't ask you yet. 182 00:21:17,143 --> 00:21:19,994 - Rocco. - I'd suggest it as well. 183 00:21:20,214 --> 00:21:24,441 Surgery? Yes, operate. But right away, right? Nils? 184 00:21:24,630 --> 00:21:25,973 Definitely. 185 00:21:25,974 --> 00:21:27,972 Have you already eaten anything this morning? - No. 186 00:21:28,162 --> 00:21:29,319 - Eaten nothing, drank nothing? - No. 187 00:21:29,505 --> 00:21:31,195 Out of sheer pain I have not eaten anything. 188 00:21:31,733 --> 00:21:34,769 Wonderful, then we apply general anesthesia. Why? Michael. 189 00:21:40,601 --> 00:21:43,256 - An awkward silence. - Yes. 190 00:21:43,596 --> 00:21:45,638 Which spares us the everlasting chatter. 191 00:21:45,823 --> 00:21:46,937 Alright then. 192 00:21:47,166 --> 00:21:49,124 We'll see you later, looking forward to it, bye. 193 00:21:49,202 --> 00:21:53,121 And what exactly will you do in the operating room? 194 00:21:53,308 --> 00:21:56,464 In the OR we will cut the inflamed tissue... 195 00:21:56,688 --> 00:21:58,577 around the skin lesion out in a wedge-shape. 196 00:21:59,644 --> 00:22:00,921 - Okay. - Good. 197 00:22:01,102 --> 00:22:04,565 Can you draw it for me? I can't imagine it.. 198 00:22:04,749 --> 00:22:07,179 Uh... 199 00:22:14,463 --> 00:22:17,085 So the circle represents your behind. 200 00:22:17,266 --> 00:22:19,810 The circle is my anus. 201 00:22:22,411 --> 00:22:24,486 Oooaaahhh! 202 00:22:24,791 --> 00:22:28,208 You have to read these documents. 203 00:22:28,591 --> 00:22:29,902 And sign at the end. 204 00:22:30,549 --> 00:22:32,515 It says something about incontinence. 205 00:22:33,237 --> 00:22:34,744 What does that have to do with pee? 206 00:22:35,233 --> 00:22:38,269 - This is anal incontinence. - Never heard of it. 207 00:22:40,033 --> 00:22:44,029 Ah, that means I can no longer close my sphincter. 208 00:22:44,371 --> 00:22:46,643 - And shit will just run right out of me. - Right. 209 00:22:46,828 --> 00:22:50,171 - You' ll need a diaper then. - Exactly. 210 00:22:50,398 --> 00:22:52,319 But happens relatively rarely. 211 00:22:52,701 --> 00:22:54,285 So, will you sign here? 212 00:22:55,159 --> 00:22:57,889 I can't really operate myself at home. 213 00:22:58,116 --> 00:23:00,005 Right, Valerie? 214 00:23:00,342 --> 00:23:02,770 That's right. 215 00:23:02,953 --> 00:23:04,646 That' s where it got me now. 216 00:23:04,872 --> 00:23:06,761 Shit, man. 217 00:23:06,946 --> 00:23:08,791 All the fault of a Ladyshave. 218 00:23:09,402 --> 00:23:12,483 Actually I shave myself only because of Kanell. 219 00:23:13,204 --> 00:23:17,626 If I had not met him, this would not have happened. 220 00:23:34,436 --> 00:23:36,477 - Are you shaven? - What? 221 00:23:38,274 --> 00:23:39,628 Whether you've shaved. 222 00:23:40,655 --> 00:23:42,085 No, why do you ask? 223 00:23:43,341 --> 00:23:46,039 Because I would like to shave you sometime. 224 00:23:46,835 --> 00:23:48,419 Here is my address. 225 00:23:51,059 --> 00:23:54,476 This is one of my most spontaneous dates for sures. 226 00:25:45,659 --> 00:25:48,663 So I don't bruise my knees. 227 00:26:57,262 --> 00:26:59,150 Want to fuck me now? 228 00:27:00,563 --> 00:27:02,409 But you are too young. 229 00:27:06,322 --> 00:27:08,470 Too bad. 230 00:27:08,471 --> 00:27:10,900 Get dressed. 231 00:27:24,635 --> 00:27:27,015 Helen, hi. I'm Robin, the nurse. 232 00:27:31,239 --> 00:27:32,702 I've got some news for you, 233 00:27:34,232 --> 00:27:36,962 we' ve managed to plan your operation real soon. 234 00:27:41,183 --> 00:27:45,069 So, you are operated on the anus, a very unsanitary body part. 235 00:27:45,251 --> 00:27:48,669 In fact, the most unhygienic part of the whole body. 236 00:27:49,052 --> 00:27:52,437 Just the coat, please. You need to take it all off. 237 00:27:52,622 --> 00:27:54,207 - Completely naked? - Exactly. 238 00:27:55,042 --> 00:27:56,154 Problem? 239 00:27:56,155 --> 00:27:57,193 - Yes. - Why? 240 00:27:57,768 --> 00:27:59,994 I think that's just awful. 241 00:28:01,145 --> 00:28:03,952 They all just talk about what you look like. 242 00:28:04,141 --> 00:28:07,832 - Oh, these are all professionals. - Yes, of course. Professionals. 243 00:28:10,706 --> 00:28:13,939 I can hear what they're talking about. 244 00:28:14,123 --> 00:28:15,859 In my subconscious. 245 00:28:16,848 --> 00:28:18,737 Then I'll go crazy, 246 00:28:19,344 --> 00:28:21,845 in a few years, and no one knows why. 247 00:28:24,259 --> 00:28:25,372 Uh, the... 248 00:28:26,024 --> 00:28:27,411 - the skirt as well. - Ah. 249 00:28:29,326 --> 00:28:31,554 Yes, it does some patients like that. 250 00:28:31,745 --> 00:28:34,173 Mhm. 251 00:28:42,225 --> 00:28:44,654 Okay. 252 00:28:54,473 --> 00:28:55,903 - Excited? - Yes. 253 00:28:56,124 --> 00:28:58,552 Very good. 254 00:28:58,772 --> 00:29:02,815 - What are you writing about? - A list of my hobbies. 255 00:29:02,996 --> 00:29:04,536 I have to think over, 256 00:29:04,916 --> 00:29:07,569 what I'll sacrifice to God non-existent, 257 00:29:07,756 --> 00:29:10,333 so that he' ll spare me anal incontinence. 258 00:29:10,828 --> 00:29:12,063 Okay. 259 00:29:12,249 --> 00:29:14,215 And what do you want to offer him? 260 00:29:14,974 --> 00:29:16,089 Point 2 261 00:29:16,779 --> 00:29:17,937 Or point 3 262 00:29:18,928 --> 00:29:21,080 Drugs or hookers. 263 00:29:24,303 --> 00:29:27,612 - Yes, that's good. - That's a great sacrifice, I think. 264 00:29:27,836 --> 00:29:30,183 Here's a sedative for you. 265 00:29:30,370 --> 00:29:32,794 It makes the transition to general anesthesia soft and supple. 266 00:29:33,480 --> 00:29:35,865 Here. 267 00:29:40,583 --> 00:29:43,465 That hit my uvula hard. 268 00:29:44,037 --> 00:29:46,233 Mine is quite sensitive. 269 00:29:46,418 --> 00:29:48,461 I know that from cock sucking. 270 00:29:48,645 --> 00:29:50,840 When they poke real deep, you know? 271 00:29:51,025 --> 00:29:53,024 - Classic. - Yeah, or something. 272 00:29:57,360 --> 00:30:00,363 Has your girlfriend got gagging problems as well? 273 00:30:00,700 --> 00:30:03,813 Uh, no, she doesn' t do oral sex that much. 274 00:30:04,002 --> 00:30:06,546 - Too bad. - Yeah, I thinks so as well. 275 00:30:07,303 --> 00:30:09,531 What do you think so as well? 276 00:30:10,989 --> 00:30:12,070 Nothing. 277 00:30:12,256 --> 00:30:15,062 We are talking about an undersupply of oral sex. 278 00:30:15,595 --> 00:30:16,746 Aw. 279 00:30:16,747 --> 00:30:17,753 Mhm. 280 00:30:19,935 --> 00:30:22,363 How nice. 281 00:30:28,688 --> 00:30:29,802 Valerie! 282 00:30:36,981 --> 00:30:38,794 - Girlfriend? - Well, 283 00:30:39,131 --> 00:30:41,981 we 're having a kind of relationship break. 284 00:30:42,163 --> 00:30:44,358 Wow. For how long? 285 00:30:47,155 --> 00:30:48,236 Two years. 286 00:30:49,381 --> 00:30:50,691 All right. 287 00:30:52,798 --> 00:30:55,101 Here. 288 00:30:55,102 --> 00:30:57,756 So can I call you someone? 289 00:30:58,096 --> 00:30:59,592 Your parents? 290 00:30:59,593 --> 00:31:01,474 No. 291 00:31:01,475 --> 00:31:04,556 My parents died tragically. 292 00:31:05,392 --> 00:31:07,617 Really? 293 00:31:07,618 --> 00:31:09,354 Could these eyes lie? 294 00:31:10,805 --> 00:31:11,809 I think so. 295 00:31:13,915 --> 00:31:15,717 Right. 296 00:31:15,718 --> 00:31:16,755 Very well in fact. 297 00:31:26,929 --> 00:31:28,818 - Okay, come over here. - What is it? 298 00:31:29,002 --> 00:31:30,739 Where is the ball-point pen? 299 00:31:30,922 --> 00:31:33,390 You will call my parents, okay? - Yes. 300 00:31:34,070 --> 00:31:35,687 - That' s dad. - Yes. 301 00:31:36,604 --> 00:31:38,034 And that's mom. 302 00:31:39,100 --> 00:31:40,945 They have to come at the same time. 303 00:31:41,172 --> 00:31:42,636 - Okay. - That is important. 304 00:31:42,824 --> 00:31:44,397 - Do you understand? - I promise. - Okay. 305 00:31:44,512 --> 00:31:47,396 - United at their daughters bedside. - Okay. 306 00:32:17,453 --> 00:32:19,190 Look here, it's the foot. 307 00:32:21,562 --> 00:32:23,101 It' s constantly kicking me. 308 00:32:28,011 --> 00:32:30,473 Do you feel that? 309 00:32:31,620 --> 00:32:34,080 Not so hard. 310 00:33:22,376 --> 00:33:25,837 Come on, the face doesn' t hurt that much. 311 00:33:31,972 --> 00:33:33,556 Have you washed yourself? 312 00:33:36,350 --> 00:33:37,661 Show me your butt. 313 00:33:47,676 --> 00:33:48,980 All right. 314 00:33:48,981 --> 00:33:50,640 This afternoon, 315 00:33:50,862 --> 00:33:53,788 the Dutch city of Enschede. Was shaken by a huge explosion, 316 00:33:53,972 --> 00:33:57,051 The first reports of the fire at a fireworks factory 317 00:33:57,235 --> 00:34:00,577 were only vague, yet later it became a certainty. 318 00:34:00,766 --> 00:34:03,115 Enschede, hours after the explosion. 319 00:34:03,339 --> 00:34:05,261 Clouds of smoke still rise in the sky 320 00:34:05,450 --> 00:34:09,415 and give a first impression of the size of the disaster... 321 00:34:14,358 --> 00:34:16,825 So now it is just as if we had kissed. 322 00:34:17,353 --> 00:34:19,090 Since it had my spit on it. 323 00:34:20,501 --> 00:34:22,227 Here. 324 00:34:22,228 --> 00:34:24,346 It's better than plastic toys. 325 00:34:30,828 --> 00:34:32,674 At the time there happened to be 326 00:34:32,862 --> 00:34:36,937 a cameraman for the Dutch Local TV station TV Oost at the site. 327 00:34:37,125 --> 00:34:39,975 His pictures are a cinematic document. 328 00:34:40,157 --> 00:34:42,702 Of the minutes of terror that took place. 329 00:34:48,297 --> 00:34:52,796 Nah, too tight for me, just go over to your mattress. 330 00:35:18,589 --> 00:35:19,854 Ah! 331 00:35:19,855 --> 00:35:21,242 Come here, little one. 332 00:35:21,583 --> 00:35:25,776 After Toni's birth my parents just argued. 333 00:35:27,111 --> 00:35:29,919 Blow it out, sweetie, make a wish. 334 00:35:32,141 --> 00:35:34,030 Please let dad back inside. 335 00:35:43,275 --> 00:35:44,858 Ta-da! For you. 336 00:35:46,307 --> 00:35:49,922 The most beautiful thing was the reconciliation after each battle. 337 00:35:50,761 --> 00:35:53,797 Sometimes you had to help out a little. 338 00:35:59,784 --> 00:36:02,710 Eventually they didn't want to be helped anymore, 339 00:36:03,047 --> 00:36:04,739 and divorced. 340 00:36:04,927 --> 00:36:07,549 And they put me in a boarding school. 341 00:36:10,265 --> 00:36:13,190 But I couldn't stand it for too long. 342 00:36:13,374 --> 00:36:16,869 And luckily there were others, who sorely needed my help. 343 00:36:17,060 --> 00:36:19,407 Okay, then just stick your finger inside. 344 00:36:28,462 --> 00:36:29,818 And then smell it. 345 00:36:38,560 --> 00:36:39,641 Do it one more time. 346 00:36:48,042 --> 00:36:49,397 Hi. 347 00:36:50,845 --> 00:36:52,275 Make yourself at home. 348 00:36:52,458 --> 00:36:53,539 This is Michael. 349 00:36:53,725 --> 00:36:57,798 The boy Corinna is head over heels in love with. 350 00:36:58,024 --> 00:37:00,453 Hi. 351 00:37:02,017 --> 00:37:04,397 And Michael has other advantages. 352 00:37:05,242 --> 00:37:08,049 He pushed the best grass in town. 353 00:37:08,236 --> 00:37:10,271 Do you have money? 354 00:37:10,272 --> 00:37:12,391 Watch out that he doesn' t steal anything. 355 00:37:12,576 --> 00:37:15,003 I'll get money. 356 00:37:27,011 --> 00:37:28,475 So, what do you do? 357 00:37:30,197 --> 00:37:31,552 I sell drugs. 358 00:37:33,652 --> 00:37:36,121 Nah, I mean in your spare time. 359 00:37:37,454 --> 00:37:38,730 I listen to music. 360 00:37:39,065 --> 00:37:40,216 Cool. 361 00:37:40,217 --> 00:37:41,911 Hm - And... 362 00:37:42,290 --> 00:37:44,442 - what do you listen to? - Minimal. 363 00:38:24,983 --> 00:38:26,218 Uh! 364 00:38:31,586 --> 00:38:33,126 Stop it. 365 00:38:39,764 --> 00:38:42,028 Stop it! 366 00:38:42,029 --> 00:38:43,951 Give me my teddy! Right now! 367 00:38:44,564 --> 00:38:47,566 Your teddy looks completely torn. We must bury him, Toni. 368 00:38:47,903 --> 00:38:49,016 No! 369 00:38:49,017 --> 00:38:50,481 Give me my teddy! 370 00:39:04,335 --> 00:39:05,842 You have beautiful breasts. 371 00:39:16,928 --> 00:39:19,505 When I bathe, I always dive right in. 372 00:39:20,230 --> 00:39:21,341 Mhm. 373 00:39:21,342 --> 00:39:22,730 Everything is warm then. 374 00:39:23,954 --> 00:39:25,308 - Hot? - And quiet. 375 00:39:27,294 --> 00:39:29,522 Somehow one feels so... 376 00:39:30,326 --> 00:39:31,758 sheltered or something. 377 00:39:32,515 --> 00:39:34,434 Like a child. 378 00:39:34,435 --> 00:39:36,864 Like a child? 379 00:39:37,353 --> 00:39:39,820 I would sure like to be real small again. 380 00:39:40,002 --> 00:39:41,586 Do you? 381 00:39:42,651 --> 00:39:44,724 No. 382 00:39:44,725 --> 00:39:47,454 I don' t know my way around children. 383 00:39:52,441 --> 00:39:54,713 I've had me sterilized. 384 00:39:57,508 --> 00:39:59,627 And what does your mother say about that? 385 00:40:02,039 --> 00:40:03,349 She doesn' t know. 386 00:40:35,902 --> 00:40:38,095 It's all gone well. 387 00:40:42,735 --> 00:40:47,419 How can one be so stupid, as to cut oneself in the ass? 388 00:40:47,611 --> 00:40:49,576 Well, maybe there is a loving God after all, 389 00:40:49,761 --> 00:40:51,420 and everyone gets the injury, he deserves. 390 00:40:52,563 --> 00:40:53,722 Is it possible 391 00:40:54,100 --> 00:40:58,172 to see what they cut away at the surgery? 392 00:40:59,358 --> 00:41:02,854 I do not want that a part of me ends up in the trash, 393 00:41:03,198 --> 00:41:06,278 with appendices and abortions. 394 00:41:06,500 --> 00:41:08,772 I 'll ask around if it's ok. 395 00:41:08,957 --> 00:41:10,387 Did my parents come? 396 00:41:10,723 --> 00:41:13,377 No, I could only reach their voicemail. 397 00:41:13,564 --> 00:41:16,599 But I told them about the fissure and the successful OP.. 398 00:41:16,789 --> 00:41:18,482 And about the hemorrhoids. 399 00:41:24,199 --> 00:41:25,553 What are you listening to? 400 00:41:31,225 --> 00:41:33,191 Valerie, it's me. 401 00:41:33,413 --> 00:41:35,564 I do not know whether you'll ever hear this, 402 00:41:35,755 --> 00:41:37,337 but this is for you. 403 00:42:34,073 --> 00:42:35,185 Oh. 404 00:42:35,186 --> 00:42:37,411 What's up? 405 00:42:37,412 --> 00:42:38,601 I've got it. 406 00:42:38,602 --> 00:42:40,831 I'm impressed, nurse Robin. 407 00:42:44,439 --> 00:42:45,977 Where 's my clothes? 408 00:42:46,358 --> 00:42:48,819 They're over here. 409 00:42:49,699 --> 00:42:50,965 Oh. 410 00:42:50,966 --> 00:42:53,664 This is the situation, mom is so afraid of. 411 00:42:53,844 --> 00:42:55,351 Her absolute nightmare. 412 00:42:57,799 --> 00:43:00,988 My mom thinks the most important thing for a woman is, 413 00:43:01,178 --> 00:43:04,104 to have clean underwear in hospital. 414 00:43:04,287 --> 00:43:08,666 But unfortunately you do not know in advance, when you get to the hospital. 415 00:43:47,478 --> 00:43:51,291 Mamas's last thoughts before her death at the scene would be: 416 00:43:51,664 --> 00:43:54,699 How many hours have I worn my underpants? 417 00:43:56,731 --> 00:43:58,162 Are there any traces yet? 418 00:44:21,724 --> 00:44:23,646 I can gladly wash it for you if you want. 419 00:44:23,990 --> 00:44:26,142 No. I can wear them one more week. 420 00:44:27,331 --> 00:44:29,405 Can you call my parents? 421 00:44:30,017 --> 00:44:34,900 You have to order them here. Tomorrow. At five. It' s important. 422 00:44:35,240 --> 00:44:36,592 Both of them together. 423 00:44:36,813 --> 00:44:39,663 Tomorrow, five o' clock, together. 424 00:44:39,846 --> 00:44:42,074 Here. In this room. 425 00:44:43,993 --> 00:44:45,346 Yes, got it. 426 00:44:45,682 --> 00:44:47,298 If you're in pain, simply ring... 427 00:44:47,486 --> 00:44:49,175 I will. 428 00:44:49,176 --> 00:44:50,442 Okay. 429 00:44:50,443 --> 00:44:51,950 - Robin? - Yes? 430 00:44:53,667 --> 00:44:56,095 Thank you. 431 00:45:03,226 --> 00:45:05,727 Don't be frightened Light comes on. 432 00:45:05,915 --> 00:45:08,262 It' s a high-fiber diet for you. 433 00:45:11,442 --> 00:45:13,561 And what if I have a bowel movement? 434 00:45:14,207 --> 00:45:16,326 The wound will heal with daily bowel movements, 435 00:45:16,511 --> 00:45:18,814 so that everything expands nicely. Come on. 436 00:45:23,882 --> 00:45:26,311 One more. 437 00:45:28,796 --> 00:45:31,144 After your bowel movement you are discharged from the hospital. 438 00:45:31,560 --> 00:45:32,871 So eat it all up. 439 00:46:16,595 --> 00:46:19,023 Shit. 440 00:47:06,083 --> 00:47:09,271 Sorry. How can I help you, Helen? 441 00:47:11,803 --> 00:47:13,190 Do you smell something? 442 00:47:15,450 --> 00:47:17,264 Hmm... barely. 443 00:47:30,308 --> 00:47:34,000 - Can we speak less formally now? - Yes, of course. 444 00:47:37,333 --> 00:47:39,070 I need to ask you something. 445 00:47:40,137 --> 00:47:42,565 Yes? 446 00:47:44,129 --> 00:47:46,598 Could you photograph my wound? 447 00:47:47,430 --> 00:47:49,312 My butt hole? 448 00:47:49,313 --> 00:47:50,896 - Nope. - Nope? 449 00:47:51,078 --> 00:47:54,005 - That... that's not allowed. - That's not allowed? 450 00:47:54,187 --> 00:47:55,801 Nope. Well I do not know if it is allowed, 451 00:47:55,877 --> 00:47:57,341 but I think it's not allowed. 452 00:47:57,529 --> 00:47:59,908 But noone has to know if we do this. 453 00:48:01,252 --> 00:48:03,218 You only have to take your cellphone. 454 00:48:03,402 --> 00:48:06,973 No, my phone is not allowed in the patients rooms for sure. 455 00:48:07,165 --> 00:48:09,741 But it's not for calling someone up now is it, Robin. 456 00:48:10,081 --> 00:48:12,507 You do want to photograph my ass. 457 00:48:12,732 --> 00:48:15,160 Right? 458 00:48:18,529 --> 00:48:22,263 - This is really good. - That's it. I know it. 459 00:48:24,249 --> 00:48:25,440 Here. 460 00:48:25,632 --> 00:48:28,175 That's more hole than ass, man. 461 00:48:29,048 --> 00:48:31,549 I can't be an ass-model anymore with that. 462 00:48:31,927 --> 00:48:34,276 I've never been allowed to see the wounds of other patients. 463 00:48:34,462 --> 00:48:35,848 - Yes? - Yes. Right. 464 00:48:36,036 --> 00:48:38,887 Now maybe a bit more... Just take your hand away from there. 465 00:48:39,069 --> 00:48:41,497 - So? - Yes. 466 00:48:46,017 --> 00:48:48,486 - Have you had a bowel movement? - No. 467 00:48:49,934 --> 00:48:51,245 - Really? - Really. 468 00:48:53,696 --> 00:48:55,432 How are we feeling today? 469 00:48:56,806 --> 00:48:59,231 - Crappy. - Crappy? 470 00:48:59,417 --> 00:49:00,951 Yes. 471 00:49:00,952 --> 00:49:03,606 I have a picture of your masterpiece. 472 00:49:04,369 --> 00:49:05,724 Uh, here. 473 00:49:08,783 --> 00:49:12,748 But as far as I can see the photo has been made at close range 474 00:49:18,229 --> 00:49:20,032 Yes. 475 00:49:20,033 --> 00:49:22,461 Yes. 476 00:49:24,295 --> 00:49:25,485 Very close. 477 00:49:26,559 --> 00:49:27,672 Well, 478 00:49:27,673 --> 00:49:30,938 in this routine procedure there were no complications. 479 00:49:31,321 --> 00:49:32,752 Except for anal incontinence? 480 00:49:33,549 --> 00:49:35,468 You do not know that, what you're talking about. 481 00:49:35,658 --> 00:49:37,243 Of course, I know that 482 00:49:37,425 --> 00:49:40,123 - Anal incontinence? - Yes. - Is the wound bleeding then? 483 00:49:40,458 --> 00:49:41,769 - Nope. - You see. 484 00:49:42,148 --> 00:49:46,035 So, once you have a bowel movement, You can go home. Yes? 485 00:49:46,216 --> 00:49:49,483 And that can happen today. 486 00:49:49,711 --> 00:49:53,751 - Memel. I am Helen's mom. - Ah! Excellent. Glad to meet you. 487 00:49:53,934 --> 00:49:56,817 We have just noticed how wonderful the operation went. 488 00:49:57,005 --> 00:49:59,889 - Oh, wonderful! I am pleased. - I beg to differ, mama. 489 00:50:00,115 --> 00:50:02,036 She's a bit high-strung of course, your daughter 490 00:50:02,226 --> 00:50:03,810 It's quite normal in girls at that age. 491 00:50:04,031 --> 00:50:05,385 - Exactly. - Oh, really? 492 00:50:05,568 --> 00:50:07,915 Yes. don't worry. 493 00:50:08,255 --> 00:50:10,831 We have befriended each other. Right? Michael? Yes? 494 00:50:11,019 --> 00:50:12,985 But when you need tips for bringing her up, 495 00:50:13,168 --> 00:50:14,906 then we will help you. 496 00:50:15,088 --> 00:50:17,468 We have to deal with difficult personalities more often here. 497 00:50:19,733 --> 00:50:21,622 - And you were? - Professor Dr. Notz. 498 00:50:21,807 --> 00:50:23,652 - I am the head doctor of this clinic. - Ah, yes. 499 00:50:24,303 --> 00:50:25,655 Doctor Notz, 500 00:50:26,029 --> 00:50:28,497 Her mother is perhaps a difficult personality, 501 00:50:28,678 --> 00:50:31,377 but not my daughter. If I may give you a hint: 502 00:50:32,058 --> 00:50:35,246 Keep your mouth shut and do your work. 503 00:50:35,935 --> 00:50:38,363 Bye. 504 00:50:41,426 --> 00:50:44,155 Cede repugnanti! Cedendo victor abibis. 505 00:50:44,535 --> 00:50:46,763 Yield to him who opposes you... 506 00:50:47,145 --> 00:50:50,412 By yielding you conquer. Hm? 507 00:50:55,591 --> 00:50:58,978 Now they will all hate me here. Because of you. 508 00:51:00,007 --> 00:51:01,470 How was the surgery? 509 00:51:03,462 --> 00:51:04,544 Was not there. 510 00:51:05,305 --> 00:51:06,583 It was general anesthesia. 511 00:51:06,918 --> 00:51:08,992 You're too early. I appointed you at five. 512 00:51:09,221 --> 00:51:11,416 Can you come again after work? 513 00:51:11,755 --> 00:51:14,714 My god, one can't do anything right with you. 514 00:51:16,937 --> 00:51:18,522 God again. 515 00:51:20,585 --> 00:51:23,010 Can you take that god up there down? 516 00:51:23,350 --> 00:51:26,200 - No, I can not. - Still. It bothers me. 517 00:51:26,997 --> 00:51:29,039 Quit that nonsense, Helen. 518 00:51:29,415 --> 00:51:31,109 I can do it myself as well. 519 00:51:31,490 --> 00:51:33,917 No. 520 00:51:37,747 --> 00:51:39,254 All right, I'll do it already! 521 00:51:46,461 --> 00:51:48,890 Careful. 522 00:51:52,642 --> 00:51:54,259 Since when did you have.. 523 00:51:55,983 --> 00:51:57,676 These things there on you? 524 00:51:58,555 --> 00:52:00,983 Hemorrhoids? 525 00:52:01,396 --> 00:52:02,750 - Yes. - Always have. 526 00:52:03,124 --> 00:52:04,783 Not true, I have bathed you as a baby. 527 00:52:05,158 --> 00:52:06,513 It's been a while. 528 00:52:07,693 --> 00:52:08,843 Yes. 529 00:52:08,844 --> 00:52:11,225 They are hereditary. The hemorrhoids. 530 00:52:12,722 --> 00:52:16,337 - Do you have them, or dad? - You got them from your father 531 00:52:16,561 --> 00:52:18,712 I got your stuff, without which you can not even... 532 00:52:18,903 --> 00:52:19,984 Yes. I see it. 533 00:52:20,362 --> 00:52:22,984 There are seven. That's the second. 534 00:52:26,735 --> 00:52:28,624 I love soft surfaces. 535 00:52:29,384 --> 00:52:34,146 As the greasy leather of the buck in our sports hall in the past. 536 00:52:35,412 --> 00:52:38,601 But you have to save these moments for 537 00:52:38,790 --> 00:52:40,221 when nobody notices. 538 00:52:40,442 --> 00:52:42,407 Helen! What are you doing? 539 00:52:42,745 --> 00:52:44,132 What is that nonsense? 540 00:52:45,855 --> 00:52:49,198 Or so soft like the glans of a penis. 541 00:55:39,964 --> 00:55:43,611 I really want, ever since I can remember, to have a child. 542 00:55:44,340 --> 00:55:49,070 But in our family there is a recurring pattern: 543 00:55:51,943 --> 00:55:53,602 My great-grandmother. 544 00:55:53,786 --> 00:55:55,139 My grandma. 545 00:55:55,360 --> 00:55:56,550 My mama. 546 00:55:56,742 --> 00:55:57,748 And I. 547 00:55:57,931 --> 00:55:59,121 All firstborn. 548 00:55:59,467 --> 00:56:00,579 All girls. 549 00:56:00,580 --> 00:56:03,464 All weak nerves, disturbed and unhappy. 550 00:56:13,557 --> 00:56:16,712 With my sterilization I have broken this cycle. 551 00:56:18,510 --> 00:56:19,668 From my tummy 552 00:56:20,008 --> 00:56:23,621 unhappy, disturbed beings will never crawl out. 553 00:56:49,569 --> 00:56:51,304 Okay! Thank you! 554 00:56:52,102 --> 00:56:55,641 I have brought you something from America. 555 00:56:55,866 --> 00:56:58,717 The Turduck roast. 556 00:56:59,052 --> 00:57:02,819 You take a quail, the quail one stuffs into a chicken, 557 00:57:03,160 --> 00:57:05,082 the chicken into a goose 558 00:57:05,311 --> 00:57:10,956 and in the end we have the turkey, which entirely covers the goose. 559 00:57:11,184 --> 00:57:12,800 Okay. 560 00:57:14,985 --> 00:57:17,180 Oh, it makes me feel queasy in the stomach. 561 00:57:19,438 --> 00:57:22,704 At Helen's birth, the doctors had to make an episiotomy. 562 00:57:22,895 --> 00:57:24,706 There was a noise just like this. 563 00:57:36,024 --> 00:57:37,258 And actually... 564 00:57:38,097 --> 00:57:39,943 it looked exactly like this as well. 565 00:57:45,968 --> 00:57:49,385 It's an organic turkey, so everyone, even the vegetarians... 566 00:57:54,606 --> 00:57:57,034 Cheers! 567 00:57:57,485 --> 00:57:59,560 You want me to applaude you? 568 00:58:00,327 --> 00:58:02,904 Look, that's where they've cut. 569 00:58:04,127 --> 00:58:07,819 It's all I wanted to say. That's where they've cut in. 570 00:58:10,501 --> 00:58:12,928 Ass. 571 00:58:23,207 --> 00:58:27,052 Slugs. Is this an allusion to my butt hole? 572 00:58:27,240 --> 00:58:30,625 I thought you were interested in slugs. 573 00:58:30,849 --> 00:58:32,845 You asked me about them sometimes. 574 00:58:33,036 --> 00:58:35,384 And now I have a whole book. 575 00:58:36,031 --> 00:58:38,460 Yes. 576 00:58:40,484 --> 00:58:43,214 I get tablets for the pain. 577 00:58:43,556 --> 00:58:45,820 What pain? 578 00:58:45,821 --> 00:58:46,979 At my butt. 579 00:58:48,086 --> 00:58:49,275 Of ourse. 580 00:58:50,467 --> 00:58:53,426 - What kind of tablets? - Neon coloured. 581 00:59:01,793 --> 00:59:03,606 Do you still have an appointment? 582 00:59:04,980 --> 00:59:07,281 No. 583 00:59:07,282 --> 00:59:09,904 You? - I need to leave you alone again unfortunately. 584 00:59:10,124 --> 00:59:13,772 Hospitals, those are not for me. I feel myself quite ill. 585 00:59:16,919 --> 00:59:19,956 But you can still read to me a bit. 586 00:59:23,139 --> 00:59:26,601 It's summer now, everything is dry and the snail is scared... 587 00:59:26,786 --> 00:59:28,555 dying of heat. 588 00:59:30,434 --> 00:59:33,774 I will read to you gladly. When I pick you up. 589 00:59:37,497 --> 00:59:39,845 Well, a friendly greeting to your colleagues then. 590 00:59:41,413 --> 00:59:42,723 Which colleagues? 591 00:59:44,830 --> 00:59:46,447 Your work colleagues. 592 00:59:53,392 --> 00:59:55,008 - Be well. - Uh-huh. 593 01:00:03,413 --> 01:00:04,843 Good to see you. 594 01:00:06,598 --> 01:00:09,372 That's good, I have to tell you something. 595 01:00:14,392 --> 01:00:15,430 I love you. 596 01:00:15,621 --> 01:00:18,243 I will stay with you forever, even if I do not love you. 597 01:00:18,424 --> 01:00:20,007 It has to be so, when you have children. 598 01:00:40,000 --> 01:00:41,354 Get well soon. 599 01:01:00,079 --> 01:01:03,542 I've been thinking about your wound and about your... 600 01:01:03,727 --> 01:01:05,112 ...Looseness. 601 01:01:06,413 --> 01:01:09,831 I've talked it over with a buddy and he told me... 602 01:01:11,866 --> 01:01:15,174 that you're an exhibitionist or something. 603 01:01:15,359 --> 01:01:17,248 I don' t know how he gets that idea. 604 01:01:18,047 --> 01:01:20,624 Loving to show, I always say. 605 01:01:21,272 --> 01:01:23,696 - Yes. Is that bad? - Not at all, I... 606 01:01:23,882 --> 01:01:26,809 On the contrary, I would hope that more girls... 607 01:01:28,145 --> 01:01:31,639 be like this, ehm, who take the initiative, you know.. 608 01:01:32,790 --> 01:01:33,827 Come a little closer. 609 01:01:36,014 --> 01:01:38,443 Come closer. 610 01:01:43,424 --> 01:01:45,117 Now close your eyes. 611 01:01:45,306 --> 01:01:47,733 What? 612 01:01:49,297 --> 01:01:50,991 Close your eyes. 613 01:01:52,524 --> 01:01:54,599 I 'll tell you a story. 614 01:01:55,365 --> 01:01:59,405 In the street where I live, is a brothel. The Sauna Oasis. 615 01:01:59,971 --> 01:02:04,165 Guys are always invited for their 18th birthday by their parents. 616 01:02:04,348 --> 01:02:07,656 I was not invited. So I did everything myself. 617 01:02:11,528 --> 01:02:12,609 Hi. 618 01:02:12,948 --> 01:02:14,411 Any women who do it with women? 619 01:02:26,578 --> 01:02:27,812 Cynthia! 620 01:02:36,636 --> 01:02:38,482 And I pick one. 621 01:03:15,527 --> 01:03:17,341 Come on. 622 01:03:21,400 --> 01:03:22,756 Put it on the table. 623 01:03:28,043 --> 01:03:30,472 Thank you. 624 01:03:48,852 --> 01:03:50,282 Can I lick you? 625 01:03:50,503 --> 01:03:52,932 Yes. 626 01:04:36,114 --> 01:04:37,271 Did you come? 627 01:04:38,493 --> 01:04:39,759 Yes. 628 01:04:39,760 --> 01:04:41,344 That went pretty fast alright. 629 01:04:46,058 --> 01:04:47,640 Do you know why I picked you? 630 01:04:48,014 --> 01:04:50,442 Nope. 631 01:04:51,393 --> 01:04:53,698 Copper roof, always damp in the basement. 632 01:04:55,425 --> 01:04:57,345 That's what my father always said. 633 01:05:03,180 --> 01:05:05,374 I will give it to her. 634 01:05:05,560 --> 01:05:08,749 These are the residues that they have cut away from your anus. 635 01:05:08,938 --> 01:05:10,828 - Here you go. - Thank you. 636 01:05:13,008 --> 01:05:16,165 - Did you have a bowel movement? - I do not think so. 637 01:05:16,655 --> 01:05:19,084 And you? 638 01:05:19,496 --> 01:05:21,647 The material in the bag is highly infectious. 639 01:05:21,838 --> 01:05:23,116 So deal with it accordingly, ok? 640 01:05:23,297 --> 01:05:24,685 Hygiene is paramount in the hospital. 641 01:05:25,025 --> 01:05:28,258 It's at home with me, also an important issue. 642 01:05:29,093 --> 01:05:31,868 You know, the sooner you dump, the sooner we are rid of you, ok? 643 01:05:33,318 --> 01:05:34,399 Do you understand me? 644 01:05:34,738 --> 01:05:37,741 When you're finished playing with your ass parts 645 01:05:37,963 --> 01:05:40,463 make sure they go back to the hospital waste. 646 01:05:40,842 --> 01:05:43,147 You've got great eyelashes. 647 01:05:43,339 --> 01:05:46,526 One can't beat natural lashes like that, right, Mrs. Memel? 648 01:05:46,715 --> 01:05:47,982 Mhm. 649 01:05:47,983 --> 01:05:51,445 You must be proud of your daughter. Hello, sweetness. 650 01:05:53,435 --> 01:05:55,554 - Well then, pleasure to talk to you. - Yeah. 651 01:05:55,738 --> 01:05:57,245 - Goodbye. - Goodbye. 652 01:06:00,961 --> 01:06:02,806 An old gypsy saying goes, 653 01:06:03,147 --> 01:06:05,573 when one gets too many compliments for something, 654 01:06:05,797 --> 01:06:07,643 then perhaps it's about to break down. 655 01:06:11,979 --> 01:06:13,744 Look. 656 01:06:13,745 --> 01:06:16,205 Here, for you. 657 01:06:22,267 --> 01:06:25,074 This is all just a dream, sweetheart. 658 01:06:25,416 --> 01:06:26,528 Go back to sleep. 659 01:06:26,529 --> 01:06:29,183 I'm not sure mama really did this, 660 01:06:29,370 --> 01:06:32,908 because I often mix up reality, lies and dreams. 661 01:06:33,095 --> 01:06:36,709 Mainly because of the many drugs, I've taken. 662 01:06:44,497 --> 01:06:47,151 Michael left his box of drugs 663 01:06:47,337 --> 01:06:49,074 And went off with the real cola. 664 01:06:53,826 --> 01:06:55,824 Do we need to notice him? 665 01:07:03,501 --> 01:07:04,778 A mustache kiss. 666 01:07:06,341 --> 01:07:07,577 Oh, my God. 667 01:07:09,376 --> 01:07:11,035 This one is a bit longer. 668 01:07:28,035 --> 01:07:30,461 Slowly. 669 01:07:39,282 --> 01:07:41,711 Stop. 670 01:07:51,376 --> 01:07:53,375 Hi, this is Michael. First I, then beep, then you 671 01:07:53,718 --> 01:07:55,411 Oh man, voicemail again. 672 01:07:56,674 --> 01:07:58,640 Here is your favorite Helen. 673 01:07:59,016 --> 01:08:02,205 If you are looking for your Coke can, uh, we have it. 674 01:08:02,396 --> 01:08:05,703 We have started to drink, the Coke already. Bye. 675 01:08:05,888 --> 01:08:07,352 Okay, he knows. 676 01:08:08,192 --> 01:08:09,427 Yummy! 677 01:08:12,069 --> 01:08:15,258 Have you actually ever slept together? 678 01:08:15,448 --> 01:08:18,070 No. He waits for the right moment. - I see. 679 01:08:56,797 --> 01:08:58,031 Um... 680 01:09:33,538 --> 01:09:35,967 Yay! 681 01:09:53,310 --> 01:09:55,276 Hey, we were here before. 682 01:09:55,614 --> 01:09:57,612 I think I am completely sober. 683 01:09:57,995 --> 01:09:59,883 I'm cold. Fire! 684 01:11:27,832 --> 01:11:31,217 Debt was the main outcome of our adventure. 685 01:11:32,133 --> 01:11:35,550 Michael wouldn't talk to us for a week. 686 01:11:42,653 --> 01:11:47,106 And to appease Michael, I baptized the rat Michael 2. 687 01:11:48,256 --> 01:11:51,872 Unfortunately Michael 2 had left us again soon.. 688 01:12:00,275 --> 01:12:02,928 In revenge, I decided kill her new husband. 689 01:12:11,638 --> 01:12:15,711 But that I would have done my mother a favor. 690 01:12:44,117 --> 01:12:47,765 What are you doing? - I'll cover you up, you're very exposed. 691 01:12:47,995 --> 01:12:49,579 Just let it go. 692 01:12:50,607 --> 01:12:54,220 - Doesn't matter what it looks like. - Then stay like that, in God's name. 693 01:12:54,407 --> 01:12:55,444 Yes. 694 01:12:55,674 --> 01:12:58,175 You're late. You can leave again. 695 01:12:59,168 --> 01:13:00,403 You're impossible. 696 01:13:01,893 --> 01:13:03,936 I wish that once you have a daughter, 697 01:13:04,159 --> 01:13:06,812 she acts to you like this as well, tit for tat. 698 01:13:07,039 --> 01:13:08,807 Then you're in for a long wait. 699 01:13:09,303 --> 01:13:11,145 Why? 700 01:13:11,146 --> 01:13:12,685 Don't you want children? 701 01:13:16,023 --> 01:13:17,299 Can this be thrown out? 702 01:13:19,362 --> 01:13:20,666 Give it to me. 703 01:13:20,667 --> 01:13:22,589 These are the parts from my ass. 704 01:13:23,279 --> 01:13:24,785 Can you go now? 705 01:13:25,466 --> 01:13:27,202 Can come back tomorrow. 706 01:13:29,805 --> 01:13:32,233 Just go. 707 01:13:35,832 --> 01:13:37,187 And be on time tomorrow. 708 01:14:17,027 --> 01:14:18,382 Valerie... 709 01:14:22,710 --> 01:14:24,599 we only wanted to say to you 710 01:14:24,975 --> 01:14:28,054 that we'd like to thank you for the last two years 711 01:14:28,391 --> 01:14:30,543 and the 175 night shifts, you've taken... 712 01:14:35,648 --> 01:14:36,760 Thank you. 713 01:14:36,761 --> 01:14:38,497 And all the best for your birthday and... 714 01:14:57,224 --> 01:14:59,692 Hello, Spacko. I need a pizza. 715 01:15:00,180 --> 01:15:04,788 Yes, a spinach pizza and a six pack At the Hilf... Maria Hilf Hospital. 716 01:15:04,980 --> 01:15:07,557 Room 265 Did you write that down? 717 01:15:08,243 --> 01:15:09,355 All right. 718 01:15:09,356 --> 01:15:12,621 If the pizza is cold, I'll shove it up your ass. 719 01:16:11,090 --> 01:16:13,559 Corrina is such a good friend of mine, 720 01:16:13,740 --> 01:16:16,972 that we are always get our period at the same time. 721 01:16:18,193 --> 01:16:21,503 And we made up something special about that. 722 01:16:21,879 --> 01:16:22,917 Are you ready? 723 01:16:23,109 --> 01:16:25,380 We exchanged our Tampons. 724 01:16:25,564 --> 01:16:28,033 Corinna put my self-made one in, 725 01:16:28,367 --> 01:16:31,404 with which I hope to ban the American Tampon industry. 726 01:16:31,784 --> 01:16:33,706 There it comes, okay? 727 01:16:46,527 --> 01:16:47,882 My blood sister. 728 01:16:52,477 --> 01:16:53,832 My blood sister. 729 01:16:56,587 --> 01:16:59,053 Say, do you actually get those things back out? 730 01:16:59,887 --> 01:17:01,154 Most of the time. 731 01:17:01,155 --> 01:17:04,572 The only small disadvantage to my homemade tampons is, 732 01:17:04,917 --> 01:17:07,768 that they lack the small blue filament. 733 01:17:10,944 --> 01:17:13,751 - I can't get it out. - Okay, do not panic. 734 01:17:37,781 --> 01:17:38,895 Ah. 735 01:17:39,087 --> 01:17:40,703 Where was it? Thank you. 736 01:17:53,445 --> 01:17:56,405 Where are you going? Hello? I'm talking to you. 737 01:17:56,593 --> 01:17:58,287 - Hi. - Hello. 738 01:17:58,475 --> 01:18:01,401 - Well that took forever. - Oh, you ordered pizza? 739 01:18:01,777 --> 01:18:04,659 - That makes 19 euros. - So, I 'll give you 12 740 01:18:05,002 --> 01:18:07,959 Helen, shouldn't you eat high fiber food after surgery? 741 01:18:08,148 --> 01:18:09,690 The prices are not negotiable. 742 01:18:10,031 --> 01:18:11,690 Can you advance me something? I'm broke. 743 01:18:14,177 --> 01:18:17,518 - What about tipping? - Say a nice greeting to the kitchen. 744 01:18:18,093 --> 01:18:21,980 Tell them a drunken monkey could bake a better pizza. 745 01:18:22,393 --> 01:18:24,817 - All right. - Helen Memel is the name. 746 01:18:25,003 --> 01:18:26,269 - Fuck you. - Wow. 747 01:18:26,270 --> 01:18:28,269 - Give it to me. - Mmm. 748 01:18:28,459 --> 01:18:30,764 - Give it to me! - That is proper juicy. 749 01:18:35,138 --> 01:18:37,104 Want some? 750 01:18:37,481 --> 01:18:39,170 - No thanks, I've had some. - Do you want beer? 751 01:18:39,248 --> 01:18:40,831 You know, there simply are certain rules. 752 01:18:41,704 --> 01:18:44,052 - For you or for me? - Well, for all of us. 753 01:18:44,238 --> 01:18:46,127 For all. 754 01:18:47,194 --> 01:18:48,659 Stop that! Man! 755 01:18:51,840 --> 01:18:54,267 Thank you. 756 01:18:56,832 --> 01:18:59,297 - Do you know my pizza story? - Nope. 757 01:18:59,634 --> 01:19:01,632 - You don't? - Nah, tell me. 758 01:19:02,628 --> 01:19:05,708 That's why I'm so soggy with the delivery boy. 759 01:19:05,892 --> 01:19:07,426 Mhm. 760 01:19:07,427 --> 01:19:09,163 Because I want sex. 761 01:19:09,692 --> 01:19:11,614 With very many different men. 762 01:19:11,842 --> 01:19:13,763 - At the same time. - Sounds logical. 763 01:19:14,915 --> 01:19:17,381 First of all. - This story has gone around for a long time. 764 01:19:17,755 --> 01:19:20,102 Two girls order pizza. 765 01:19:21,057 --> 01:19:22,903 But the pizza doesn't arrive. 766 01:19:23,283 --> 01:19:26,515 And so the girls keep calling back and complain. 767 01:19:29,196 --> 01:19:31,085 Sometime later, the pizza arrives. 768 01:19:32,498 --> 01:19:35,119 But somehow the pizza tastes funny. 769 01:19:36,529 --> 01:19:38,724 So the girls bring the pizza to one of their fathers, 770 01:19:39,063 --> 01:19:42,218 coincidentally a food chemist. 771 01:19:42,594 --> 01:19:44,636 Still, they all think the pizza has gone bad or so. 772 01:19:46,011 --> 01:19:50,008 But the analysis tells a different story. 773 01:19:50,234 --> 01:19:51,774 On the pizza... 774 01:19:52,154 --> 01:19:55,770 is the cum of four different men. 775 01:19:58,067 --> 01:19:59,987 Well, I imagine the origin of the story like this: 776 01:20:00,754 --> 01:20:02,294 Our friends are annoyed. 777 01:20:05,092 --> 01:20:09,777 And because the main characters are girls, they have rape fantasies. 778 01:20:11,466 --> 01:20:13,192 Normal. 779 01:20:13,193 --> 01:20:16,502 So they get their cocks out and jerk off together on the pizza. 780 01:21:21,417 --> 01:21:23,883 I would like to eat such a pizza. 781 01:21:24,257 --> 01:21:28,713 That would be as if four men ejaculate directly into my mouth. 782 01:21:29,095 --> 01:21:31,749 Did you ever get an opportunity like that before? 783 01:21:32,281 --> 01:21:34,978 Uh, rather rare. 784 01:21:36,735 --> 01:21:38,318 Ahh... is delicious. 785 01:21:47,446 --> 01:21:49,211 Good night. 786 01:21:49,212 --> 01:21:50,489 Sleep. 787 01:22:08,639 --> 01:22:10,757 Got my money yet? 788 01:22:10,943 --> 01:22:13,519 I've almost shit my pants, you Spacko. 789 01:22:16,855 --> 01:22:20,350 - Corinna and I need the money. - Corinna and you? 790 01:22:21,079 --> 01:22:23,305 Do you want to move in together or what? 791 01:22:24,188 --> 01:22:25,225 Something like that. 792 01:22:39,968 --> 01:22:42,009 What 's wrong with Michael? 793 01:22:49,488 --> 01:22:53,180 What? Did you finally get to play on his magic flute? 794 01:22:53,559 --> 01:22:56,026 No. Could you? 795 01:22:57,205 --> 01:22:58,439 I am pregnant. 796 01:23:00,123 --> 01:23:02,551 Aha. 797 01:23:05,038 --> 01:23:07,462 You know, I'm looking forward to it. 798 01:23:22,391 --> 01:23:24,356 I think it's selfish of you. 799 01:23:25,923 --> 01:23:29,658 But that doesn't change a thing between us. - This changes everything. 800 01:23:32,564 --> 01:23:34,071 And you know it 801 01:23:40,012 --> 01:23:42,557 Do you know why you have a family like you do? 802 01:23:52,260 --> 01:23:54,335 Do you know why you have no friends? 803 01:23:59,132 --> 01:24:00,290 You stink. 804 01:24:08,001 --> 01:24:09,661 I feel sorry for you. 805 01:24:11,763 --> 01:24:12,998 Get out! 806 01:25:23,979 --> 01:25:25,595 In Helen's birth, 807 01:25:25,937 --> 01:25:28,482 because the doctors had to make an episiotomy. 808 01:25:31,236 --> 01:25:33,660 makes me feel queasy. 809 01:26:28,018 --> 01:26:30,322 It smells of gas in my room. 810 01:26:46,907 --> 01:26:48,064 I smell nothing. 811 01:26:49,939 --> 01:26:52,211 Maybe not. 812 01:26:54,278 --> 01:26:55,742 It was just a joke. 813 01:26:56,082 --> 01:26:57,770 What is this? 814 01:26:57,771 --> 01:26:59,847 I thought it was boring without you. 815 01:27:01,150 --> 01:27:04,383 Do me a favor and don't take me for a fool, okay? 816 01:27:05,757 --> 01:27:07,907 No, I get this sometimes. 817 01:27:10,633 --> 01:27:13,134 - But I do not know why. 818 01:27:15,239 --> 01:27:17,669 Good night. 819 01:27:19,579 --> 01:27:21,272 Yeah, fuck you too, Robin. 820 01:27:21,613 --> 01:27:22,617 What? 821 01:27:22,957 --> 01:27:25,385 Nothing. 822 01:27:26,297 --> 01:27:27,575 Fuck you all. 823 01:27:28,064 --> 01:27:30,492 Assholes. 824 01:28:08,952 --> 01:28:10,142 Good day, daughter. 825 01:28:10,372 --> 01:28:11,410 Good day, dad. 826 01:28:16,591 --> 01:28:19,019 Surprise? 827 01:28:22,849 --> 01:28:25,151 A balloon? 828 01:28:25,152 --> 01:28:26,310 A red balloon. 829 01:28:27,571 --> 01:28:29,460 That will make me better for sure, dad. 830 01:28:29,645 --> 01:28:30,879 No idea what that is? 831 01:28:32,025 --> 01:28:33,761 A hemorrhoid cushion. 832 01:28:33,945 --> 01:28:36,140 You can sit on it, with no pain. 833 01:28:36,478 --> 01:28:38,215 Did you get this from the plumbing trade? 834 01:28:38,551 --> 01:28:40,473 Isn't it called the medical trade? 835 01:28:40,816 --> 01:28:43,244 Right. 836 01:28:50,261 --> 01:28:51,616 Your hair is gray. 837 01:28:56,748 --> 01:28:57,862 Well. 838 01:28:57,863 --> 01:29:01,205 Maybe I should leave you be for now. 839 01:29:01,548 --> 01:29:03,514 Start with the grieving process. 840 01:29:05,502 --> 01:29:06,858 If you're gone then, 841 01:29:07,039 --> 01:29:09,387 everyone will wonder why I'm so well off. 842 01:29:10,801 --> 01:29:12,385 Sounds reasonable. 843 01:29:36,371 --> 01:29:37,801 - What? - Nothing. 844 01:29:39,096 --> 01:29:40,833 Thanks for inflating it. 845 01:29:57,255 --> 01:29:59,636 I've got to be back on the road. 846 01:29:59,829 --> 01:30:02,558 It really is hard with your schedule. 847 01:30:04,280 --> 01:30:06,171 Yes, work is waiting. 848 01:30:10,732 --> 01:30:13,385 What are you by profession, dad? 849 01:30:14,916 --> 01:30:17,068 You have no idea, what do I do? 850 01:30:18,833 --> 01:30:20,220 Not exactly, no. 851 01:30:22,979 --> 01:30:24,170 I am an engineer. 852 01:30:28,700 --> 01:30:30,742 Should I also become an engineer? 853 01:30:32,193 --> 01:30:34,621 Yes. 854 01:30:35,034 --> 01:30:37,959 But you're so bad at math 855 01:30:56,802 --> 01:30:58,266 Are you in pain? 856 01:31:01,948 --> 01:31:04,491 I discourage the use of this pillow. 857 01:31:05,364 --> 01:31:08,061 It's for people with unoperated hemorrhoids, 858 01:31:09,510 --> 01:31:13,660 and if you sit on it, then everything breaks again. 859 01:31:18,264 --> 01:31:19,455 Is the wound bleeding? 860 01:31:20,874 --> 01:31:23,302 No. 861 01:31:23,831 --> 01:31:25,523 Then everything is good. 862 01:31:26,058 --> 01:31:27,718 We can dismiss you. 863 01:31:28,093 --> 01:31:31,826 No, I need to stay there, I still have to have bowel movements. 864 01:31:32,929 --> 01:31:36,742 This pressure on defecation, brings nothing good. 865 01:31:36,922 --> 01:31:39,619 Try it in peace. At home. 866 01:31:39,955 --> 01:31:42,151 Can I still stay one day? 867 01:31:43,296 --> 01:31:46,451 No, we only see each other if the wound is bleeding. 868 01:31:48,402 --> 01:31:50,829 Well. 869 01:31:51,089 --> 01:31:52,476 Never to be seen again. 870 01:31:53,509 --> 01:31:55,124 I say, good-bye. 871 01:33:38,511 --> 01:33:40,050 Yes? What are you doing? 872 01:33:43,348 --> 01:33:44,583 Holy shit! 873 01:33:44,770 --> 01:33:48,231 I moved a little weird earlier. 874 01:33:53,944 --> 01:33:55,222 Out of my way, please! 875 01:34:02,046 --> 01:34:03,552 Prepare general anesthesia. 876 01:34:09,609 --> 01:34:11,302 Caution! Man! 877 01:34:11,643 --> 01:34:13,489 Robin, you have to call my parents. 878 01:34:13,831 --> 01:34:15,263 - Both, okay? - Yes. 879 01:34:15,598 --> 01:34:17,028 Tell them what happened. 880 01:34:17,364 --> 01:34:19,908 This is my last chance to get them here together. 881 01:34:20,090 --> 01:34:23,432 They are preparing the OR for you right now. 882 01:34:23,814 --> 01:34:26,042 They don't have to clean it up for me. 883 01:34:26,233 --> 01:34:28,537 I don' t care too much about order. 884 01:34:28,727 --> 01:34:29,885 Yes. I know. 885 01:34:30,225 --> 01:34:33,611 - So, there you go. - Robin, I'm afraid. 886 01:34:33,949 --> 01:34:37,138 Yes, I'm scared too. I'm scared for you. 887 01:34:56,140 --> 01:34:59,755 We need to start now, because you lost a lot of blood. 888 01:34:59,941 --> 01:35:02,365 You may think that you're still aware of everything, 889 01:35:02,705 --> 01:35:05,741 but this is in reality only a fraction of of what is going on. 890 01:35:10,460 --> 01:35:12,841 Here we have all had a bit of bad luck. 891 01:35:13,033 --> 01:35:14,038 Especially you. 892 01:37:15,697 --> 01:37:18,471 Everyone hoped that I'd forget. 893 01:37:19,113 --> 01:37:22,804 But through her silence it has become ever greater. 894 01:37:23,259 --> 01:37:25,148 Until it has swallowed me. 895 01:37:31,936 --> 01:37:33,979 I have Toni tells everything. 896 01:37:34,163 --> 01:37:37,122 The hardest conversation I've ever had to perform. 897 01:37:40,229 --> 01:37:43,919 - The did you know? - I always have this shit dreams. 898 01:38:19,312 --> 01:38:22,272 - Where is he? - I do not know who you mean. 899 01:38:23,152 --> 01:38:24,965 He gave me this thing over here. 900 01:38:25,149 --> 01:38:27,114 I got it turned on, but there is nothing on it. 901 01:38:28,258 --> 01:38:30,685 Only noise. 902 01:38:58,627 --> 01:39:01,055 Helen? 903 01:39:01,506 --> 01:39:03,580 Are you laid off? 904 01:39:05,191 --> 01:39:06,622 I've been looking for you. 905 01:39:08,839 --> 01:39:11,764 Yes, I'm just on the way home. 906 01:39:11,949 --> 01:39:13,870 You're lucky that you still caught me.. 907 01:39:14,059 --> 01:39:15,065 You too. 908 01:39:15,442 --> 01:39:17,094 Because you can take me to your home. 909 01:39:19,511 --> 01:39:22,975 You really have to think over whether that's okay with you. 910 01:39:23,582 --> 01:39:24,696 Yes. 911 01:39:26,191 --> 01:39:29,228 Yes, you still have to think, or yes, you're okay with it? 912 01:39:49,995 --> 01:39:53,567 If I live with you, surely you want to sleep with me. 913 01:39:58,096 --> 01:40:01,208 Yes. But for starters, not in the ass. 914 01:40:30,000 --> 01:40:31,463 Get me out of here. 66105

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