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1
00:00:00,801 --> 00:00:02,335
We're gonna be late
for the parade!
2
00:00:02,469 --> 00:00:03,669
Okay. Relax, Andy.
3
00:00:03,671 --> 00:00:04,937
The parade
is not going anywhere.
4
00:00:05,072 --> 00:00:06,271
I don't want
to miss the floats.
5
00:00:06,407 --> 00:00:07,540
Nah, we're okay, buddy.
6
00:00:07,675 --> 00:00:09,342
Andy, why are you
so pumped up?
7
00:00:09,476 --> 00:00:10,876
Cause I love
the Thanksgiving parade.
8
00:00:10,878 --> 00:00:12,611
When I was a kid,
I loved seeing
9
00:00:12,613 --> 00:00:14,213
the engine go down the street.
10
00:00:14,349 --> 00:00:15,548
You still sound
like a little kid.
11
00:00:15,683 --> 00:00:17,082
I don't know about all that,
12
00:00:17,084 --> 00:00:18,817
but you could call me
a card-carrying
13
00:00:18,819 --> 00:00:20,152
Parade-ophile!
14
00:00:21,622 --> 00:00:23,155
I'd be careful
how you enunciate that.
15
00:00:23,290 --> 00:00:24,823
Ike, come on.
Let's get moving, hurry!
16
00:00:24,825 --> 00:00:26,359
Okay, little buddy.
We got lots of time.
17
00:00:26,493 --> 00:00:27,960
You know the parade route's
just two blocks
18
00:00:28,095 --> 00:00:29,428
from here, right?
Are we there yet?
19
00:00:29,564 --> 00:00:31,296
Are we there yet?
20
00:00:31,298 --> 00:00:32,431
All right,
we'll be there in a sec.
21
00:00:32,567 --> 00:00:34,433
Just kidding.
Are we there yet?
22
00:00:37,304 --> 00:00:40,673
Oh!
23
00:00:47,782 --> 00:00:50,649
No, sir.
This engine's going nowhere.
24
00:00:50,651 --> 00:00:53,518
No, no, not today.
Aw, I'm sorry, Andy.
25
00:00:53,654 --> 00:00:55,120
Well, why can't we
throw the truck in neutral?
26
00:00:55,256 --> 00:00:56,922
I could ride on top,
and then the rest of you guys
27
00:00:57,058 --> 00:00:58,591
could just push it down
the parade route.
28
00:00:58,726 --> 00:00:59,792
We need to get
the engine fixed
29
00:00:59,927 --> 00:01:01,326
in case we get a call.
Hey, Ike,
30
00:01:01,462 --> 00:01:02,928
call the superintendent
of apparatus.
31
00:01:03,064 --> 00:01:04,529
Spatchcock? No!
32
00:01:04,665 --> 00:01:06,531
Chief, please.
We need to get it fixed.
33
00:01:06,667 --> 00:01:07,733
Chief, not Spatchcock.
34
00:01:07,735 --> 00:01:09,534
Not today!
Ike, call him.
35
00:01:09,536 --> 00:01:11,737
Okay.
36
00:01:11,739 --> 00:01:14,673
Andy, don't act like a baby.
Okay. Go easy on him, Chief.
37
00:01:14,675 --> 00:01:16,742
He had his heart set on it.
That's no reason to pout.
38
00:01:16,744 --> 00:01:18,543
Well, leave me alone!
Hey!
39
00:01:18,679 --> 00:01:21,013
You go cool off
in the bunk room, pal.
40
00:01:21,148 --> 00:01:23,348
Fine!
Stupid engine...
41
00:01:23,350 --> 00:01:24,549
He'll be all right,
poor fella.
42
00:01:24,685 --> 00:01:26,018
He just needs his nap.
Hey, Andy,
43
00:01:26,153 --> 00:01:28,487
just remember everything
you should be thankful for.
44
00:01:28,623 --> 00:01:30,423
Fuck you!
Oh!
45
00:01:30,557 --> 00:01:31,757
You watch that mouth,
young man!
46
00:01:31,892 --> 00:01:33,492
See what happens
when you give him juice?
47
00:01:33,494 --> 00:01:36,429
Happy Thanksgiving,
everybody.
48
00:01:36,564 --> 00:01:39,432
49
00:01:39,567 --> 00:01:44,503
♪ ♪
50
00:01:44,505 --> 00:01:47,239
♪ Well, I'm hot-blooded ♪
51
00:01:47,374 --> 00:01:49,642
♪ Check it and see ♪
52
00:01:49,777 --> 00:01:53,779
♪ I got a fever of 103 ♪
53
00:01:53,781 --> 00:01:55,615
♪ I'm hot-blooded ♪
54
00:01:58,853 --> 00:02:00,653
Well, hopefully
a blown-out engine
55
00:02:00,788 --> 00:02:02,521
is the only problem
you guys have on Thanksgiving.
56
00:02:02,657 --> 00:02:04,123
What could be worse?
Don't jinx us.
57
00:02:04,125 --> 00:02:05,858
I predict three deep-fried
turkey fires today.
58
00:02:05,993 --> 00:02:07,660
All right, well,
now that the parade's a bust,
59
00:02:07,795 --> 00:02:09,328
I'm gonna head out
to the family dinner.
60
00:02:09,330 --> 00:02:11,530
Oh, you're leaving, Chief?
Are you sure you don't
61
00:02:11,666 --> 00:02:12,998
want to hang out with us
this year?
62
00:02:13,134 --> 00:02:14,199
Nah, Vicky's working,
63
00:02:14,335 --> 00:02:15,468
so I'm gonna join
Lucy's sisters
64
00:02:15,602 --> 00:02:16,669
over at their granddad's house.
65
00:02:16,804 --> 00:02:18,403
Thanksgiving
with the Commish.
66
00:02:18,405 --> 00:02:21,006
I've spent a lifetime trying
to avoid my dad on this day.
67
00:02:21,142 --> 00:02:23,476
I'm glad I'm on duty.
And I'm glad I'm not.
68
00:02:23,610 --> 00:02:24,810
I'm gonna go change
into my civvies
69
00:02:24,812 --> 00:02:26,211
and get outta here
before Spatchcock
70
00:02:26,213 --> 00:02:28,013
shows up to fix that engine.
71
00:02:28,015 --> 00:02:30,149
Ugh, Spatchcock
is disgusting.
72
00:02:30,151 --> 00:02:32,017
He's always covered
in grease and muck
73
00:02:32,019 --> 00:02:33,752
and he's always bleeding
from somewhere.
74
00:02:33,754 --> 00:02:35,620
Spatchcock is always
going on and on
75
00:02:35,622 --> 00:02:37,690
about some useless drivel. Ugh!
76
00:02:37,825 --> 00:02:40,025
Spatchcock.
He always makes me feel like
77
00:02:40,027 --> 00:02:41,494
it's my fault
when anything breaks down.
78
00:02:41,629 --> 00:02:43,496
All right.
Well, have fun everyone.
79
00:02:43,630 --> 00:02:45,698
We'll miss you deeply,
Chiefy!
80
00:02:45,833 --> 00:02:47,366
Nice acting job.
81
00:02:47,368 --> 00:02:49,302
Even I believed you wanted
Chief to stick around.
82
00:02:49,436 --> 00:02:52,037
Thank you. It really
was a masterclass, wasn't it?
83
00:02:52,039 --> 00:02:54,307
I love him, but the best part
about working on Thanksgiving
84
00:02:54,441 --> 00:02:57,576
is we get to do it our way,
not the Terry McConky way.
85
00:02:57,712 --> 00:02:59,578
He can be a bit overbearing.
86
00:02:59,714 --> 00:03:01,580
At home, he makes us
wear Pilgrim hats,
87
00:03:01,582 --> 00:03:04,317
play touch football,
eat all his lame dishes.
88
00:03:04,451 --> 00:03:05,851
This is gonna be
my first Thanksgiving
89
00:03:05,987 --> 00:03:07,720
without all his rules,
and I am very excited.
90
00:03:07,855 --> 00:03:09,855
Station Thanksgiving
has no rules.
91
00:03:09,857 --> 00:03:10,990
Now you're talking!
92
00:03:11,125 --> 00:03:11,991
For dinner, we can make
93
00:03:12,126 --> 00:03:12,992
whatever we want.
94
00:03:13,127 --> 00:03:14,660
I'm making spaghetti pie.
95
00:03:14,662 --> 00:03:16,395
I'm making turkey
and stuffing, but this year,
96
00:03:16,531 --> 00:03:18,531
it's a free-range
Narraganset turkey,
97
00:03:18,666 --> 00:03:20,799
and I'm stuffing it
with crab meat
98
00:03:20,801 --> 00:03:22,868
stuffed inside a salmon.
99
00:03:22,870 --> 00:03:25,738
Ooh, you're talking
about turcrabmon?
100
00:03:25,873 --> 00:03:27,806
I just read about that
in this November's issue
101
00:03:27,942 --> 00:03:30,275
of "Delicious AF."
Yeah!
102
00:03:30,411 --> 00:03:33,078
See, this is the Thanksgiving
I've always dreamed of.
103
00:03:33,080 --> 00:03:35,348
Let's get it started
with a homemade onion dip.
104
00:03:35,482 --> 00:03:37,883
Lucy, do me a favor
and chop some onions, please.
105
00:03:38,019 --> 00:03:39,618
How am I already
the onion bitch?
106
00:03:39,620 --> 00:03:41,086
Oh, yeah.
I'm just glad that
107
00:03:41,088 --> 00:03:43,022
I don't have to eat
my dad's yams this year.
108
00:03:43,024 --> 00:03:44,557
I've been hiding them
in my napkin
109
00:03:44,692 --> 00:03:46,491
and flushing them
down the toilet for ten years.
110
00:03:46,627 --> 00:03:48,361
But I love
a good sweet potato pie.
111
00:03:48,495 --> 00:03:49,828
Pretty sure
they're different.
112
00:03:49,964 --> 00:03:51,697
Sweet potatoes and yams
are the same thing.
113
00:03:51,699 --> 00:03:52,631
No, actually guys, I think
114
00:03:52,767 --> 00:03:54,900
all sweet potatoes are yams,
115
00:03:54,902 --> 00:03:58,103
but not all yams
are sweet potatoes.
116
00:03:58,105 --> 00:03:59,638
Wrong!
117
00:03:59,774 --> 00:04:02,775
A yam is not a yam at all.
118
00:04:02,910 --> 00:04:05,644
They're all sweet potatoes.
Ugh!
119
00:04:05,780 --> 00:04:07,913
Spatchcock.
Spatchcock.
120
00:04:07,915 --> 00:04:09,915
In the 1930s, a farmer called
121
00:04:10,051 --> 00:04:12,918
a soft, orange sweet potato
a yam
122
00:04:13,054 --> 00:04:15,588
to distinguish it
from other sweet potatoes.
123
00:04:15,723 --> 00:04:18,191
But a real yam
is a root vegetable
124
00:04:18,325 --> 00:04:19,858
found in tropical climates.
125
00:04:19,860 --> 00:04:23,862
So your yam
is not a yam at all!
126
00:04:23,864 --> 00:04:25,130
You got any duct tape?
127
00:04:25,132 --> 00:04:27,400
I sliced my thumb
on a fan blade.
128
00:04:27,534 --> 00:04:28,734
Come on, Spatchcock.
129
00:04:28,869 --> 00:04:30,269
Why don't you go
wash that off, man?
130
00:04:30,405 --> 00:04:32,204
We can put a bandage on it.
The tape's adhesive
131
00:04:32,339 --> 00:04:34,473
binds with the motor oil,
creates a salve.
132
00:04:34,475 --> 00:04:36,475
Most people don't know that.
133
00:04:36,611 --> 00:04:39,078
Oh, thank you there, Crysie.
134
00:04:39,080 --> 00:04:41,947
If only you could treat
the engine with as much care.
135
00:04:41,949 --> 00:04:43,416
I didn't do anything to it,
Spatchcock.
136
00:04:43,550 --> 00:04:47,420
That's funny. Always seems
to happen on your watch.
137
00:04:47,554 --> 00:04:48,888
Oh, dear Lord!
138
00:04:49,023 --> 00:04:51,556
Young lady, you're
throwing away the best part.
139
00:04:53,894 --> 00:04:56,361
Up to 35%
of the onion's vitamin C
140
00:04:56,363 --> 00:04:57,830
accumulates on the ends.
141
00:04:57,965 --> 00:05:00,299
Huh, no?
Okay, suit yourself.
142
00:05:00,301 --> 00:05:01,834
All right. Enjoy.
143
00:05:01,969 --> 00:05:03,969
She's an odd one, huh?
Okay, Spatchcock.
144
00:05:04,105 --> 00:05:05,638
The engine's outside.
Get to work.
145
00:05:05,773 --> 00:05:08,307
What, do you got yourself
a free-range bird there?
146
00:05:08,443 --> 00:05:09,708
Uh-huh.
147
00:05:09,710 --> 00:05:10,843
Definitely
the worst type to buy.
148
00:05:10,978 --> 00:05:12,645
Eventually, see,
when they do face death,
149
00:05:12,780 --> 00:05:15,380
they release
an adrenal fear hormone.
150
00:05:15,516 --> 00:05:17,516
Makes the meat taste bitter.
151
00:05:17,652 --> 00:05:19,719
Yeah.
152
00:05:21,789 --> 00:05:23,256
Bitter.
153
00:05:23,390 --> 00:05:26,058
Shut up, Spatchcock.
The meat is great.
154
00:05:26,193 --> 00:05:28,127
And don't you ever
touch my turkey again.
155
00:05:30,598 --> 00:05:32,598
Oh, the big mon!
156
00:05:32,733 --> 00:05:33,932
How do you do?
157
00:05:33,934 --> 00:05:35,801
Salutations, Chief.
158
00:05:35,936 --> 00:05:37,670
Spatchcock, how's the engine?
159
00:05:37,805 --> 00:05:39,805
Crystal did a number on it,
but I can fix it.
160
00:05:39,940 --> 00:05:41,674
In the meantime,
I brought you a spare engine.
161
00:05:41,809 --> 00:05:43,008
Fantastic.
I gotta get going, sorry.
162
00:05:43,144 --> 00:05:45,811
Hey, I like the ensemble.
163
00:05:45,946 --> 00:05:47,480
You look like
you stepped right out
164
00:05:47,615 --> 00:05:49,348
of a Norman Rockwell painting.
165
00:05:49,350 --> 00:05:51,016
Thank you very much.
I appreciate that.
166
00:05:51,018 --> 00:05:52,551
Yeah, interesting story.
167
00:05:52,687 --> 00:05:54,086
At the beginning
of World War I,
168
00:05:54,221 --> 00:05:56,755
Norman Rockwell tries
to enlist in the Navy.
169
00:05:56,757 --> 00:05:58,157
He gets rejected. Why?
170
00:05:58,293 --> 00:06:01,894
He's 17 pounds underweight.
Fascinating--
171
00:06:02,029 --> 00:06:03,896
Now check this out.
What's he do?
172
00:06:04,031 --> 00:06:05,764
He bulks up
for the next couple weeks
173
00:06:05,766 --> 00:06:08,901
on a diet
of donuts and bananas.
174
00:06:09,036 --> 00:06:10,769
Now I don't think
there was anything sexual,
175
00:06:10,771 --> 00:06:14,106
but we all have a dark side.
176
00:06:14,241 --> 00:06:16,041
Pretty sure
I know yours, Chief.
177
00:06:16,043 --> 00:06:17,810
Okay, pal.
Great.
178
00:06:19,847 --> 00:06:22,982
I'll show you
a masterclass in acting.
179
00:06:23,117 --> 00:06:24,116
Enjoy!
180
00:06:24,251 --> 00:06:25,985
Chief, are you sure
you can't stay?
181
00:06:25,987 --> 00:06:27,520
Oh, yeah, I gotta
get to the Commish's
182
00:06:27,654 --> 00:06:28,854
before they carve the bird.
183
00:06:28,990 --> 00:06:30,856
Well, just know
that Thanksgiving's
184
00:06:30,992 --> 00:06:33,258
not gonna be the same
without you.
185
00:06:33,394 --> 00:06:36,061
Aw, don't cry.
186
00:06:36,063 --> 00:06:37,596
My little girl doesn't
want to be away
187
00:06:37,732 --> 00:06:39,131
from her daddy on Thanksgiving.
188
00:06:39,266 --> 00:06:41,133
What was I thinking?
Of course I'll stay.
189
00:06:41,268 --> 00:06:43,468
I'm gonna spend the day
with my number-one girl.
190
00:06:43,604 --> 00:06:44,870
Oh, whoa, whoa!
Chief, Chief.
191
00:06:45,006 --> 00:06:46,539
What about
your other two daughters?
192
00:06:46,674 --> 00:06:48,941
Eh, I'll just call 'em and
tell 'em I'm not gonna make it.
193
00:06:49,076 --> 00:06:50,343
No, no, no.
You don't wanna do that.
194
00:06:50,477 --> 00:06:52,011
'Cause then they'll be upset--
195
00:06:52,146 --> 00:06:54,547
Yeah, Lucy will be fine.
I'm fine. I'm just--
196
00:06:54,682 --> 00:06:57,482
You know, I'm chopping onions.
I know you're fine.
197
00:06:57,484 --> 00:06:58,817
'Cause I'm staying.
198
00:06:58,819 --> 00:07:00,219
I wonder if I have
those Pilgrim hats
199
00:07:00,355 --> 00:07:01,287
still in my office.
200
00:07:03,424 --> 00:07:04,623
Poorly played, Lucy.
201
00:07:04,625 --> 00:07:06,025
You go get rid of him
right now.
202
00:07:06,160 --> 00:07:07,760
Okay, all right. I'm sorry.
203
00:07:07,895 --> 00:07:09,362
Station 24, 448 Reed Boulevard.
204
00:07:09,496 --> 00:07:11,163
Kitchen fire from a deep-fried turkey.
205
00:07:11,298 --> 00:07:13,099
When we get back,
you're getting rid of him.
206
00:07:21,876 --> 00:07:24,410
That turkey exploded like
it was stuffed with fireworks.
207
00:07:24,545 --> 00:07:26,945
No salmonella there.
That bird was overcooked.
208
00:07:26,947 --> 00:07:29,815
Spatchcock,
how's it going down there?
209
00:07:29,950 --> 00:07:31,684
Hope you're done soon
'cause that loaner sucks
210
00:07:31,819 --> 00:07:33,085
compared to my baby here.
211
00:07:33,221 --> 00:07:35,487
Yeah, how much longer?
212
00:07:35,489 --> 00:07:37,023
Hey, Spatchcock,
you hear me?
213
00:07:37,157 --> 00:07:39,425
Spatchie?
214
00:07:39,560 --> 00:07:41,827
Whoa! What the hell?
Oh!
215
00:07:45,566 --> 00:07:46,899
Uh-huh.
Thought so.
216
00:07:47,035 --> 00:07:49,167
Oops! Ah, busted.
217
00:07:49,169 --> 00:07:52,104
Just helping myself
to some of your delicacies.
218
00:07:52,240 --> 00:07:53,839
That's my French onion dip.
219
00:07:53,974 --> 00:07:56,242
Oui, oui.
Could use a bit more onion.
220
00:07:56,377 --> 00:07:58,044
That's a double dip?
Yeah.
221
00:07:58,178 --> 00:07:59,445
Plenty for everybody.
222
00:07:59,580 --> 00:08:01,980
Spatchcock, your blood
is in the bowl, man!
223
00:08:01,982 --> 00:08:04,383
Is it blood,
or food coloring?
224
00:08:04,518 --> 00:08:05,718
It's blood.
225
00:08:05,853 --> 00:08:07,053
Let's go watch some football.
Ugh!
226
00:08:07,187 --> 00:08:09,588
Yeah.
Yeah, get out of here.
227
00:08:09,590 --> 00:08:11,390
Busy, busy.
228
00:08:15,396 --> 00:08:17,329
Hey, Chief, we were
gonna watch some football.
229
00:08:17,465 --> 00:08:18,597
Lucy knows the routine.
230
00:08:18,733 --> 00:08:20,733
Parade first, then football.
231
00:08:20,868 --> 00:08:22,068
Don't worry.
I taped the game.
232
00:08:22,202 --> 00:08:23,335
Why didn't you
tape the parade
233
00:08:23,471 --> 00:08:24,536
and watch the game live?
234
00:08:24,538 --> 00:08:25,738
Parades are way better live!
235
00:08:25,740 --> 00:08:26,939
Andy, you love parades!
236
00:08:27,075 --> 00:08:28,807
I love riding in parades.
237
00:08:28,943 --> 00:08:30,076
Watching a parade on TV
238
00:08:30,210 --> 00:08:31,810
is for little kids
and psychopaths.
239
00:08:31,946 --> 00:08:33,345
Hey, simmer down, pal.
What?
240
00:08:33,347 --> 00:08:35,614
Here's Buzz Lightyear.
He's in that toy movie.
241
00:08:35,750 --> 00:08:36,815
About the story about the toys.
242
00:08:36,951 --> 00:08:38,350
I can't remember
the name of it.
243
00:08:38,486 --> 00:08:41,887
Be careful with those ropes!
He might really fly away.
244
00:08:42,022 --> 00:08:43,622
Man, I bet my little sisters
are so bummed
245
00:08:43,758 --> 00:08:45,624
they don't get to watch
the parade with you this year.
246
00:08:45,760 --> 00:08:47,893
No, I talked to them; they're
fine with me being here.
247
00:08:48,028 --> 00:08:49,095
You guys,
let's get cleaned up
248
00:08:49,229 --> 00:08:50,829
and get ready
for the Turkey giveaway.
249
00:08:50,831 --> 00:08:52,164
Hey, the cast of
"King Kong: The Musical"
250
00:08:52,300 --> 00:08:54,567
is on after the commercial.
Uh-huh.
251
00:08:54,702 --> 00:08:56,635
Okay.
What's that?
252
00:08:56,637 --> 00:08:57,970
It's my carving set.
253
00:08:57,972 --> 00:08:59,438
I brought it for dinner
at the Commish's,
254
00:08:59,440 --> 00:09:00,839
but now I'm just
gonna use it here.
255
00:09:02,376 --> 00:09:04,510
I carve the turkey here.
Not when I'm around.
256
00:09:04,645 --> 00:09:06,244
I carve the turkey.
It's tradition.
257
00:09:06,246 --> 00:09:07,513
Terry, this isn't your house.
258
00:09:07,648 --> 00:09:09,047
I'm carving the turkey here.
259
00:09:09,049 --> 00:09:11,717
I'm the Chief.
I carve the turkey, Captain.
260
00:09:15,389 --> 00:09:16,455
Super sharp.
261
00:09:18,793 --> 00:09:20,459
Uncle Eddie, I tried.
262
00:09:20,594 --> 00:09:22,795
Well, try harder.
Because there's no way
263
00:09:22,930 --> 00:09:25,731
he's gonna stab
my turcrabmon!
264
00:09:33,541 --> 00:09:34,941
You guys, man.
265
00:09:35,075 --> 00:09:38,344
He's making engine pizza
out of our scraps.
266
00:09:38,479 --> 00:09:40,146
Hey, Spatchcock,
you know you can use
267
00:09:40,281 --> 00:09:41,948
the stove inside,
if you want.
268
00:09:42,082 --> 00:09:43,882
Thanks, Granny,
but actually I prefer this.
269
00:09:43,884 --> 00:09:45,283
It's a technique
my wife taught me.
270
00:09:45,285 --> 00:09:46,618
She was a long-haul trucker.
271
00:09:46,620 --> 00:09:49,355
Cooked many a-engine pizza
in her days.
272
00:09:49,490 --> 00:09:50,957
Okay...
273
00:09:51,091 --> 00:09:52,224
You guys,
we should invite him
274
00:09:52,360 --> 00:09:53,826
to stay with us for dinner.
275
00:09:53,962 --> 00:09:55,227
No way!
Are you kidding me? No.
276
00:09:55,363 --> 00:09:57,095
Yeah, he can have dinner
with his wife.
277
00:09:57,097 --> 00:09:58,965
Haven't you seen "Planes,
Trains and Automobiles"?
278
00:09:59,099 --> 00:10:00,899
His wife's probably dead!
I haven't seen it.
279
00:10:00,901 --> 00:10:02,168
And you just ruined it.
I'm serious.
280
00:10:02,302 --> 00:10:03,636
His wife's probably dead.
281
00:10:03,771 --> 00:10:05,504
He's probably very alone
right now.
282
00:10:05,506 --> 00:10:07,039
You're right.
My wife is dead.
283
00:10:07,175 --> 00:10:08,975
Oh, you--I'm sorry, man.
284
00:10:09,109 --> 00:10:10,977
You could hear us?
Yeah, I hear everything.
285
00:10:11,111 --> 00:10:12,645
She died a couple years back.
286
00:10:12,647 --> 00:10:14,780
Logging accident.
287
00:10:14,915 --> 00:10:16,248
Yes, it was her fault.
Hey, man.
288
00:10:16,384 --> 00:10:19,185
Look, we're really sorry
to hear about that.
289
00:10:19,320 --> 00:10:21,587
And with that being said,
we'd like to invite you
290
00:10:21,722 --> 00:10:23,121
to join us for dinner.
291
00:10:23,123 --> 00:10:25,191
You're sweeter
than a honeycrisp, Granny,
292
00:10:25,326 --> 00:10:27,393
but, uh, actually
already have plans
293
00:10:27,528 --> 00:10:29,127
with my girlfriend.
294
00:10:29,129 --> 00:10:29,996
Who's a model.
295
00:10:30,130 --> 00:10:32,130
Yeah, and her twin sister,
296
00:10:32,132 --> 00:10:34,667
and we're gonna
probably hot tub
297
00:10:34,669 --> 00:10:36,869
and, uh, shave each other.
298
00:10:36,871 --> 00:10:38,470
Okay, cool.
See? He's not available.
299
00:10:38,472 --> 00:10:40,138
He's gonna be in a hot tub
with two twins
300
00:10:40,274 --> 00:10:41,740
and they're gonna
shave each other.
301
00:10:41,742 --> 00:10:44,410
Keep an eye on the pizza.
302
00:10:44,545 --> 00:10:47,079
I'm gonna go steal some cheese
from that spa-gah-ti pie.
303
00:10:47,215 --> 00:10:49,415
Spa-gah-ti!
That's how you say it.
304
00:10:49,550 --> 00:10:51,017
It's obvious that
he has too much pride
305
00:10:51,151 --> 00:10:53,819
to admit that
he has nowhere to go.
306
00:10:53,954 --> 00:10:55,354
I say,
over the course of the day,
307
00:10:55,356 --> 00:10:57,356
we secretly break equipment
for him to fix,
308
00:10:57,491 --> 00:10:58,891
and then,
by the time he's done,
309
00:10:59,027 --> 00:11:00,626
it'll be easy for him to stay.
310
00:11:00,761 --> 00:11:02,428
Pfft, lame!
Hey.
311
00:11:02,563 --> 00:11:04,430
Why don't you grow up
and start thinking
312
00:11:04,565 --> 00:11:06,965
about other people
instead of yourself, mister?
313
00:11:07,101 --> 00:11:09,035
Okay, listen.
I'll do it.
314
00:11:09,169 --> 00:11:11,037
But only because
I like breaking stuff.
315
00:11:11,171 --> 00:11:12,838
Scatter! Hurry, scatter!
What?
316
00:11:12,973 --> 00:11:15,107
Hurry! Come on! Go, go, go!
He's coming. He's coming.
317
00:11:15,109 --> 00:11:17,576
Hey, who's ready
for some football?
318
00:11:17,578 --> 00:11:20,312
Chief, right now
isn't a good time.
319
00:11:20,314 --> 00:11:22,381
Hey, Captain, button hook.
Come on, Terry.
320
00:11:22,383 --> 00:11:23,716
My hands are covered
with Crisco.
321
00:11:23,851 --> 00:11:25,584
I'm going long.
322
00:11:25,720 --> 00:11:26,985
Come on.
Whip it.
323
00:11:26,987 --> 00:11:28,654
Dad! Dad!
What are you doing?
324
00:11:28,789 --> 00:11:30,389
Oh!
Dad, are you okay?
325
00:11:30,524 --> 00:11:33,191
Hey. Hey, man.
I'm okay.
326
00:11:33,193 --> 00:11:36,662
Hey, touchdown!
327
00:11:36,797 --> 00:11:39,065
Okay. I didn't hurt my back,
so I consider that a victory.
328
00:11:39,199 --> 00:11:40,999
How about that
flattened turkey down there?
329
00:11:41,001 --> 00:11:42,935
This one?
Oh, boy.
330
00:11:43,071 --> 00:11:45,404
Oh, yeah.
It's a little squished, huh?
331
00:11:45,406 --> 00:11:47,139
It'll be okay.
Just rub some dirt in it.
332
00:11:47,141 --> 00:11:48,741
Right, guys? Hey!
333
00:11:48,876 --> 00:11:51,209
All right, who's up?
Somebody go for a pass.
334
00:11:51,345 --> 00:11:52,745
Oh, shit. My back.
All right, I'll go.
335
00:11:52,880 --> 00:11:55,448
Here you go--
oh, fuck.
336
00:12:01,489 --> 00:12:04,222
You making mashed potatoes?
Mm-hmm.
337
00:12:04,358 --> 00:12:06,358
You know the key
to good mashed potatoes?
338
00:12:06,360 --> 00:12:08,094
Butter.
The more butter, the better.
339
00:12:08,228 --> 00:12:09,495
That's what I always say.
340
00:12:09,630 --> 00:12:11,430
I'm not making
traditional mashed potatoes.
341
00:12:11,565 --> 00:12:14,032
This recipe calls for soy milk
and parmesan cheese.
342
00:12:14,034 --> 00:12:15,834
Ah, gross.
343
00:12:15,970 --> 00:12:18,504
You stir like a caveman.
344
00:12:18,639 --> 00:12:21,507
Is that crab meat?
Yes.
345
00:12:21,642 --> 00:12:23,375
In your stuffing?
Yes.
346
00:12:23,377 --> 00:12:25,043
Crab meat stuffing?
You know,
347
00:12:25,179 --> 00:12:26,712
if you don't like it,
you don't have to eat it.
348
00:12:26,847 --> 00:12:28,246
We should try Stove Top.
349
00:12:28,248 --> 00:12:29,582
Oh, God.
What are you, six years old?
350
00:12:29,717 --> 00:12:31,183
You've never let us
have it before,
351
00:12:31,185 --> 00:12:32,318
and I've always wanted
to try it.
352
00:12:32,453 --> 00:12:33,385
Let me tell you something:
353
00:12:33,387 --> 00:12:34,920
stuffing is a delicacy,
354
00:12:35,055 --> 00:12:36,522
and it deserves
delicious accents
355
00:12:36,657 --> 00:12:38,791
like pecans or figs.
356
00:12:38,793 --> 00:12:39,926
Ooh, or apples!
357
00:12:40,060 --> 00:12:42,128
I'm gonna get you apples.
358
00:12:42,263 --> 00:12:43,929
I would hide that turkey
right now.
359
00:12:44,064 --> 00:12:46,132
He's gonna give you ten
suggestions on how to cook it.
360
00:12:46,266 --> 00:12:47,666
And that's before he sees
361
00:12:47,668 --> 00:12:49,802
that you've stuffed it
with salmon and crab.
362
00:12:49,938 --> 00:12:51,304
Get rid of him!
363
00:12:54,008 --> 00:12:55,407
Well, I couldn't
find any apples,
364
00:12:55,543 --> 00:12:57,209
but I got raisins.
Next best thing, right?
365
00:12:57,345 --> 00:12:59,011
Dad, maybe you should
let him make what he wants.
366
00:12:59,013 --> 00:13:01,347
This looks like leftover
night at the United Nations.
367
00:13:01,482 --> 00:13:03,215
Dad, if you want
a traditional Thanksgiving,
368
00:13:03,351 --> 00:13:04,616
then go over
to Grandpa's house.
369
00:13:04,618 --> 00:13:06,152
We don't have any
of that stuff here.
370
00:13:06,286 --> 00:13:07,753
Oh, I do.
It's in my truck.
371
00:13:07,888 --> 00:13:09,688
I was gonna bring it
to your granddad's house.
372
00:13:09,690 --> 00:13:11,423
Go out to my truck.
I got canned corn,
373
00:13:11,425 --> 00:13:13,492
canned cranberries,
canned gravy.
374
00:13:13,494 --> 00:13:15,894
Oh, and your favorite,
canned yams, huh?
375
00:13:16,030 --> 00:13:19,097
Go ahead.
Quick like a bunny.
376
00:13:19,099 --> 00:13:21,500
Meanwhile,
I'm gonna raisin this up.
377
00:13:21,636 --> 00:13:23,369
What the hell are you doing?
I'm adding raisins.
378
00:13:23,504 --> 00:13:25,371
The more wrinkled the raisin,
the sweeter the fruit.
379
00:13:25,506 --> 00:13:29,041
You pick those
out of there right now.
380
00:13:30,778 --> 00:13:32,578
Why am I the one that needs
to squeeze back here?
381
00:13:32,713 --> 00:13:34,580
'Cause you're smaller
than we are.
382
00:13:34,715 --> 00:13:37,650
If we sabotage the air ducts,
then maybe I'll do it, okay?
383
00:13:37,652 --> 00:13:39,385
Just don't be a baby
about it, Andy.
384
00:13:41,121 --> 00:13:42,488
Ooh, busted.
385
00:13:43,992 --> 00:13:45,858
Washing machine down.
386
00:13:45,994 --> 00:13:47,059
Good job, little buddy.
387
00:13:47,195 --> 00:13:48,995
You made that washer
unusable.
388
00:13:49,129 --> 00:13:50,196
I'm gonna go tell Spatchcock.
389
00:13:50,331 --> 00:13:51,998
Chief.
Hey, Chief, Chief.
390
00:13:52,132 --> 00:13:54,066
Chief, Chief, Chief, Chief.
391
00:13:54,202 --> 00:13:56,202
You know, if they really
wanna fix football,
392
00:13:56,337 --> 00:13:58,204
they ought to hang a tire
from the goal post.
393
00:13:58,339 --> 00:14:00,006
If you kick the ball
through it, 75 points.
394
00:14:00,140 --> 00:14:01,273
That'd be a game.
395
00:14:01,409 --> 00:14:02,875
Don't you have something
to go fix?
396
00:14:02,877 --> 00:14:04,610
Trying to fix football.
397
00:14:04,745 --> 00:14:06,144
Hey, Spatchcock.
398
00:14:06,280 --> 00:14:07,479
Our washing machine
is acting up.
399
00:14:07,615 --> 00:14:09,081
You think you could
take a look at it?
400
00:14:09,083 --> 00:14:10,416
You guys are
a bunch of clowns.
401
00:14:10,551 --> 00:14:11,750
Right on.
402
00:14:11,752 --> 00:14:12,885
Okay, all right.
403
00:14:13,021 --> 00:14:14,753
Okay, Jesus.
404
00:14:14,889 --> 00:14:16,889
You should trim the ends
of those beans.
405
00:14:17,025 --> 00:14:18,957
Adds more flavor.
406
00:14:18,959 --> 00:14:21,293
We need this guy outta here.
He's gonna ruin our whole day.
407
00:14:21,295 --> 00:14:22,895
Station 24.
408
00:14:23,031 --> 00:14:25,364
Fire at 3002 Pembroke Avenue.
409
00:14:25,366 --> 00:14:28,567
Deep-fried turkey accident.
410
00:14:28,703 --> 00:14:31,169
Hey, sorry. I'd join you,
but I'm off-duty.
411
00:14:31,305 --> 00:14:32,771
And I just cracked number two.
412
00:14:32,773 --> 00:14:34,506
Yeah, I can tell
by your bar tan.
413
00:14:34,508 --> 00:14:36,174
Don't worry.
You just relax.
414
00:14:36,310 --> 00:14:38,176
And do me a favor and man
the turkey giveaway table
415
00:14:38,178 --> 00:14:40,512
while we're gone.
Will do.
416
00:14:40,648 --> 00:14:42,180
Oh, come on.
He jumped.
417
00:14:42,316 --> 00:14:43,482
He jumped!
418
00:14:45,386 --> 00:14:46,853
There you go.
That's a heavy one.
419
00:14:46,987 --> 00:14:49,788
15-pounder. Happy holiday, sir.
Thank you.
420
00:14:49,924 --> 00:14:52,458
Hi, how are ya?
421
00:14:52,593 --> 00:14:54,192
Hmm.
422
00:14:54,194 --> 00:14:56,128
Looks a little banged up, huh?
423
00:14:56,264 --> 00:14:58,997
Maybe we could find you
another one.
424
00:14:59,133 --> 00:15:02,735
I'm not sure if maybe--
425
00:15:02,737 --> 00:15:05,203
oh, I got one over here.
426
00:15:05,339 --> 00:15:07,806
Ah, look at this.
427
00:15:07,808 --> 00:15:09,675
Oh, it's heavy.
428
00:15:09,810 --> 00:15:11,811
Hey, keep the pan.
Thank you.
429
00:15:15,215 --> 00:15:17,215
Oh, yeah.
430
00:15:17,217 --> 00:15:18,484
Don't you worry,
my flat friend.
431
00:15:18,619 --> 00:15:21,019
We will find a home for you.
432
00:15:21,155 --> 00:15:22,288
Okay.
433
00:15:24,625 --> 00:15:28,026
Gonna watch some football!
434
00:15:28,162 --> 00:15:29,895
Ooh, baby!
Gotta tell you.
435
00:15:30,030 --> 00:15:32,098
That repaired engine
was purring like a kitten.
436
00:15:32,233 --> 00:15:33,566
It felt great.
437
00:15:33,701 --> 00:15:36,168
Thanks, Crystal.
Let's keep it that way.
438
00:15:36,304 --> 00:15:37,303
Yeah, you bet.
439
00:15:37,438 --> 00:15:38,504
Hoo-hoo!
440
00:15:38,639 --> 00:15:40,773
Can't wait to get my bird
in the oven.
441
00:15:40,775 --> 00:15:42,308
Where's my turkey?
442
00:15:42,443 --> 00:15:44,242
Might wanna ask the Chief.
443
00:15:44,244 --> 00:15:47,045
Nobody cooks my turkey
but me.
444
00:15:47,181 --> 00:15:48,647
Oh, brother.
445
00:15:48,649 --> 00:15:51,183
Time out, time out.
Call timeout! Come on.
446
00:15:51,319 --> 00:15:53,319
Where's my turkey?
What turkey?
447
00:15:53,454 --> 00:15:54,853
Spatchcock says you took it.
448
00:15:54,989 --> 00:15:56,789
Speaking of turkeys,
when's that guy gonna leave?
449
00:15:56,924 --> 00:15:59,458
What's this?
Oh, that's a smushed one.
450
00:15:59,460 --> 00:16:00,793
I figured we could use it
to round out
451
00:16:00,795 --> 00:16:02,594
our traditional
Thanksgiving dinner.
452
00:16:02,596 --> 00:16:04,730
I bought an expensive,
free-range, Narraganset turkey,
453
00:16:04,865 --> 00:16:06,398
and I had it out there
on the app floor.
454
00:16:06,400 --> 00:16:07,733
What happened to it?
That's where we keep
455
00:16:07,868 --> 00:16:09,802
the giveaways.
Why would you put it there?
456
00:16:09,804 --> 00:16:12,070
So you wouldn't mess with it.
Well, you should've put it
457
00:16:12,206 --> 00:16:13,472
somewhere else.
It's gone.
458
00:16:13,607 --> 00:16:15,073
But I stuffed it
with crab and salmon.
459
00:16:15,075 --> 00:16:17,243
Sounds gross.
That woman's gonna be bummed.
460
00:16:18,746 --> 00:16:20,879
Tape ain't gonna cut it
461
00:16:20,881 --> 00:16:23,081
for a big head like me.
I need my stapler.
462
00:16:23,083 --> 00:16:25,617
Enough is enough. It's time
to just come out and tell him.
463
00:16:25,619 --> 00:16:27,153
What am I supposed to say?
464
00:16:27,287 --> 00:16:28,887
He is ruining
our Thanksgiving.
465
00:16:29,023 --> 00:16:30,823
Pfft, Spatchcock.
466
00:16:30,959 --> 00:16:32,491
But he's my dad.
I can't just tell him
467
00:16:32,626 --> 00:16:34,827
we don't want him around.
468
00:16:34,829 --> 00:16:36,362
Did you know that
the guys are actually
469
00:16:36,497 --> 00:16:38,096
trying to get Spatchcock
to stay?
470
00:16:38,098 --> 00:16:39,565
Spatchcock? Why?
471
00:16:39,700 --> 00:16:41,233
They think
it'd be a good gesture.
472
00:16:41,369 --> 00:16:43,636
Think of the irony of that.
473
00:16:43,771 --> 00:16:45,371
Trying to get the Chief
to leave
474
00:16:45,506 --> 00:16:47,373
and Spatchcock to stay.
475
00:16:47,508 --> 00:16:49,775
Who woulda thunk it?
476
00:16:49,910 --> 00:16:51,844
All right.
I'll tell him.
477
00:16:51,846 --> 00:16:52,812
Okay.
478
00:16:54,915 --> 00:16:56,182
Dad.
479
00:16:56,317 --> 00:16:58,718
No, look.
Can I--can I explain?
480
00:17:00,188 --> 00:17:01,988
Dad, hold on.
481
00:17:02,122 --> 00:17:03,722
Dad, wait.
Gotta go.
482
00:17:03,724 --> 00:17:06,124
Gonna be late for dinner
with your sisters.
483
00:17:06,260 --> 00:17:08,727
Dad, come on.
484
00:17:08,729 --> 00:17:11,329
Dad.
485
00:17:11,331 --> 00:17:14,733
Hey, can we just talk?
486
00:17:14,869 --> 00:17:16,869
Dad?
487
00:17:16,871 --> 00:17:19,405
I can't hear you.
Okay, okay.
488
00:17:19,540 --> 00:17:22,074
Well, can you
roll the window down?
489
00:17:22,210 --> 00:17:23,609
I can't roll the window down.
490
00:17:23,744 --> 00:17:25,744
I thought
you couldn't hear me.
491
00:17:29,884 --> 00:17:31,617
I just had this truck serviced.
492
00:17:31,752 --> 00:17:33,151
Dad, please stay.
493
00:17:33,153 --> 00:17:34,820
Shouldn't you be saying that
to Spatchcock?
494
00:17:34,955 --> 00:17:36,755
Sounds like he's the one
you want to stay.
495
00:17:36,757 --> 00:17:38,824
I'm sorry. I should've
said something sooner.
496
00:17:38,959 --> 00:17:40,492
I love your traditions,
but this was
497
00:17:40,494 --> 00:17:41,627
my first Station Thanksgiving
498
00:17:41,762 --> 00:17:43,229
and I was excited about it.
499
00:17:43,364 --> 00:17:44,630
Because it was mine,
and, you know,
500
00:17:44,765 --> 00:17:46,498
I get to be one of the guys.
501
00:17:46,500 --> 00:17:47,900
Well, why'd you cry
when I was leaving?
502
00:17:47,902 --> 00:17:49,501
Because
I was chopping onions.
503
00:17:49,503 --> 00:17:51,503
Let that be a lesson to you.
504
00:17:51,505 --> 00:17:53,039
Only use canned onions.
Dad--
505
00:17:53,173 --> 00:17:54,306
You know, I was excited
506
00:17:54,442 --> 00:17:55,908
for your first
Station Thanksgiving too.
507
00:17:55,910 --> 00:17:58,977
Please stay.
I know where I'm not welcome.
508
00:17:58,979 --> 00:17:59,912
Dad!
509
00:18:01,115 --> 00:18:02,849
Dad.
510
00:18:02,983 --> 00:18:04,350
Seriously?
511
00:18:06,000 --> 00:18:12,074
Advertise your product or brand here
contact www.OpenSubtitles.org today
512
00:18:13,361 --> 00:18:15,093
This turkey is bullshit.
513
00:18:15,229 --> 00:18:16,562
There's no cavity anymore.
514
00:18:16,697 --> 00:18:18,631
It could never have held
a crab-stuffed salmon.
515
00:18:18,766 --> 00:18:20,699
I don't think it's bullshit.
516
00:18:20,701 --> 00:18:22,368
I think it's gonna be
a delicious turcrabmon,
517
00:18:22,503 --> 00:18:25,571
even if it's not stuffed with
salmon and crab or whatever.
518
00:18:25,706 --> 00:18:27,506
It won't be turcrabmon
without it.
519
00:18:27,508 --> 00:18:28,774
That's what the "crab"
and the "mon"
520
00:18:28,909 --> 00:18:31,377
in the name means.
Oh, right.
521
00:18:31,512 --> 00:18:33,179
Ah, man.
Yeah, we thought it was, like,
522
00:18:33,314 --> 00:18:34,647
named after the guy
who invented it,
523
00:18:34,649 --> 00:18:36,915
like Ignatius Turcrabmon,
or something.
524
00:18:36,917 --> 00:18:39,318
Who's "we"?
We all did.
525
00:18:39,453 --> 00:18:41,253
How'd it go?
Not great.
526
00:18:41,255 --> 00:18:42,521
Yo, the washing machine
is fixed,
527
00:18:42,657 --> 00:18:44,790
but I don't see Spatchcock
anywhere.
528
00:18:48,062 --> 00:18:49,728
Room for one more?
529
00:18:49,730 --> 00:18:51,263
Yes.
Hey!
530
00:18:51,399 --> 00:18:53,399
Yeah, man.
Get in here!
531
00:18:53,534 --> 00:18:56,468
Hey, how about another?
532
00:18:56,604 --> 00:18:58,537
You know it!
Yeah.
533
00:19:00,941 --> 00:19:01,941
The Cock!
534
00:19:03,811 --> 00:19:05,944
Why does Spatchcock get
to sit at the big table
535
00:19:05,946 --> 00:19:07,413
and I have to sit here
all by myself?
536
00:19:07,548 --> 00:19:09,147
Shh, stop.
Because he's our guest.
537
00:19:09,149 --> 00:19:11,483
Do you wanna have our guest
sit alone over here?
538
00:19:11,485 --> 00:19:12,885
Yeah.
Hey, cut it out.
539
00:19:14,689 --> 00:19:15,954
Excuse me.
Listen up, listen up.
540
00:19:16,090 --> 00:19:18,757
So I know I can be
a bit of a buttinsky--
541
00:19:18,759 --> 00:19:19,825
Come on!
No.
542
00:19:19,960 --> 00:19:22,028
No.
Yes, absolutely.
543
00:19:22,162 --> 00:19:25,297
But I was hoping that
you guys could tolerate
544
00:19:25,433 --> 00:19:26,899
one more
Thanksgiving tradition.
545
00:19:26,901 --> 00:19:28,835
I would love to go
around the table
546
00:19:28,969 --> 00:19:31,503
and hear
what everyone's thankful for.
547
00:19:31,505 --> 00:19:34,373
Okay? I'll go first,
I'll go first.
548
00:19:34,508 --> 00:19:37,576
All right, I am grateful
549
00:19:37,712 --> 00:19:40,246
that you guys put up with me
550
00:19:40,381 --> 00:19:43,382
for being, um,
551
00:19:43,384 --> 00:19:45,918
a tiny bit micromanage-y.
552
00:19:46,054 --> 00:19:48,987
But just so you know,
it's for your own good, okay?
553
00:19:49,123 --> 00:19:50,322
And that's it.
554
00:19:50,324 --> 00:19:52,524
I got one, guys.
Oh, okay.
555
00:19:52,660 --> 00:19:54,526
Things that
I am thankful for:
556
00:19:54,662 --> 00:19:56,729
good health, uh,
557
00:19:56,731 --> 00:19:59,798
learning from my mistakes,
558
00:19:59,934 --> 00:20:02,268
the kindness of strangers--
559
00:20:02,403 --> 00:20:03,802
Ike, what--what's this?
560
00:20:03,804 --> 00:20:06,072
I read an article about
things to be thankful for
561
00:20:06,206 --> 00:20:07,540
and wrote them down.
562
00:20:07,675 --> 00:20:08,807
Do it from the heart.
563
00:20:08,809 --> 00:20:10,409
Oh, yeah.
Yeah, sure.
564
00:20:10,411 --> 00:20:12,478
Um, of course.
565
00:20:12,613 --> 00:20:14,613
Uh, just off
the top of my head,
566
00:20:14,615 --> 00:20:18,484
uh, things that I am
personally thankful for:
567
00:20:18,619 --> 00:20:20,887
beautiful mountain streams,
the ocean,
568
00:20:21,021 --> 00:20:23,155
ladybugs, sisterhood--
Okay. Let me...
569
00:20:23,291 --> 00:20:24,857
From the heart.
570
00:20:26,694 --> 00:20:28,627
Uh...
571
00:20:28,763 --> 00:20:30,763
Spoons.
Like, clean spoons.
572
00:20:30,898 --> 00:20:32,498
A lot of countries don't have--
573
00:20:32,633 --> 00:20:34,500
actually don't have
clean spoons.
574
00:20:34,635 --> 00:20:35,902
Hey, Ike.
Hey, hey, hey, buddy.
575
00:20:36,036 --> 00:20:39,505
Guess what? I'm thankful
for Spatchcock joining us.
576
00:20:39,640 --> 00:20:40,639
Joining us.
That's what--
577
00:20:40,641 --> 00:20:41,907
Thank you, Granny.
578
00:20:42,042 --> 00:20:44,310
Wow, okay.
579
00:20:44,445 --> 00:20:46,912
I would say there are probably
580
00:20:47,047 --> 00:20:50,916
36 or 37 things
I'm grateful for this year.
581
00:20:54,254 --> 00:20:55,587
Okay, number one:
582
00:20:55,589 --> 00:20:57,523
Hirschman Engineering
came out with a new line
583
00:20:57,658 --> 00:20:58,925
of ball bearings
this past summer.
584
00:20:59,059 --> 00:21:01,059
Now, as you know,
Hirschman's typically known
585
00:21:01,061 --> 00:21:03,529
for their rod ends
or their axial shafts.
586
00:21:03,664 --> 00:21:05,197
And so, when they came out
with ball bearings,
587
00:21:05,333 --> 00:21:07,333
there was a bunch of us online
just having a chitchat,
588
00:21:07,468 --> 00:21:09,735
going, "Can you believe
what they just dropped on us?"
589
00:21:09,870 --> 00:21:14,673
'Cause Hirschman owns
the patents on 45 truck parts.
590
00:21:14,675 --> 00:21:16,408
Of those 45 truck parts--
Hi, Bernie.
591
00:21:16,544 --> 00:21:18,177
We've been thinking about you
all day.
592
00:21:20,280 --> 00:21:22,681
Sorry, gang. I know
you really had your heart set
593
00:21:22,817 --> 00:21:25,684
on me staying for dinner,
but these lovely ladies
594
00:21:25,686 --> 00:21:29,688
really, really wanna have me
for dinner.
595
00:21:29,690 --> 00:21:31,190
Little something to go.
596
00:21:33,561 --> 00:21:34,760
Ugh!
Thanks.
597
00:21:36,364 --> 00:21:37,896
Chief, one more thing.
598
00:21:38,032 --> 00:21:42,234
I took these out of your truck.
599
00:21:42,236 --> 00:21:43,769
My spark plugs.
600
00:21:43,904 --> 00:21:45,171
Yeah, I didn't want you
to get away
601
00:21:45,306 --> 00:21:47,974
without having a chance
to talk to your daughter.
602
00:21:48,108 --> 00:21:49,307
How did you--
603
00:21:49,309 --> 00:21:51,577
I hear everything.
604
00:21:51,712 --> 00:21:53,312
All right, ladies.
605
00:21:53,447 --> 00:21:55,181
Do your worst.
Uh-oh.
606
00:21:55,316 --> 00:21:57,716
I'm about to get punished.
607
00:21:57,852 --> 00:21:59,185
I did not see that coming.
608
00:21:59,319 --> 00:22:00,653
Awoo!
609
00:22:00,655 --> 00:22:02,921
Lates!
610
00:22:03,057 --> 00:22:05,123
Whoo!
611
00:22:05,125 --> 00:22:07,726
This is how "Planes,
Trains and Automobiles" ends?
612
00:22:07,862 --> 00:22:10,596
Not exactly, but damn,
I thought he was lying.
613
00:22:10,731 --> 00:22:12,598
All right, enough.
Let's eat.
614
00:22:12,733 --> 00:22:13,599
Yes!
Sounds great.
615
00:22:13,734 --> 00:22:14,733
I'm gonna let the Captain
616
00:22:14,869 --> 00:22:16,535
carve the flat turkey.
617
00:22:16,671 --> 00:22:18,070
Oh, what an honor!
618
00:22:18,206 --> 00:22:21,340
Station 24, a fire at 707 Commerce Drive.
619
00:22:21,475 --> 00:22:23,742
It's a fried turkey fire, again.
620
00:22:23,744 --> 00:22:26,144
Move out.
621
00:22:26,146 --> 00:22:28,881
I'll hold down the fort,
keep the food warm.
622
00:22:31,552 --> 00:22:32,618
Finally, dinner!
623
00:22:32,753 --> 00:22:35,621
Whoo, baby!
Ooh, yeah.
624
00:22:35,756 --> 00:22:37,423
Whoa.
Where's all the food?
625
00:22:37,558 --> 00:22:40,626
It's all gone!
626
00:22:40,761 --> 00:22:42,228
Who ate all this?
627
00:22:44,965 --> 00:22:47,033
Terry McConky.
628
00:22:47,167 --> 00:22:48,967
It actually
doesn't look half bad.
629
00:22:49,103 --> 00:22:51,169
Yeah, I like
the outside-the-box thinking.
630
00:22:51,171 --> 00:22:52,971
Hey, Andy, why don't you
slide that pizza around?
631
00:22:53,107 --> 00:22:54,440
That part's not cooked
over there.
632
00:22:54,575 --> 00:22:55,641
Why me?
633
00:22:55,776 --> 00:22:58,377
'Cause I bet
you'd be good at it.
634
00:22:59,513 --> 00:23:00,713
Aw!
Andy.
635
00:23:00,848 --> 00:23:02,448
Come on.
Pay attention, pal!
636
00:23:02,583 --> 00:23:03,782
Do it yourself next time!
637
00:23:03,918 --> 00:23:05,183
Hey, buddy.
Come here.
638
00:23:05,185 --> 00:23:06,785
Poor guy's
just having a rough day.
639
00:23:06,921 --> 00:23:08,987
Whoa!
640
00:23:09,123 --> 00:23:11,457
Ah, crap.
I hate to say it,
641
00:23:11,592 --> 00:23:13,926
but I think we're gonna have
to call Spatchcock.
642
00:23:16,397 --> 00:23:19,331
Did it stink?
You betcha!
643
00:23:21,269 --> 00:23:23,201
Spatchie, you're hysterical.
644
00:23:23,203 --> 00:23:26,072
Oh!
645
00:23:26,206 --> 00:23:29,207
Hey, Granny.
How you doing?
646
00:23:29,209 --> 00:23:32,210
Okay, I'll be right there.
647
00:23:32,346 --> 00:23:33,946
Sorry, ladies.
Duty calls.
648
00:23:34,082 --> 00:23:35,948
But Spatchles,
Pete Carroll's coming over,
649
00:23:36,084 --> 00:23:37,683
and we're supposed
to have a six-way.
650
00:23:37,818 --> 00:23:39,351
It's not gonna take too long.
651
00:23:39,353 --> 00:23:42,288
Just keep the water hot
and the champagne cold.
652
00:23:42,423 --> 00:23:43,622
Spatchie,
will you do the trick
653
00:23:43,758 --> 00:23:45,824
one more time before you leave?
654
00:23:45,826 --> 00:23:47,025
I really gotta go.
655
00:23:47,027 --> 00:23:48,627
Please, please, please,
656
00:23:48,763 --> 00:23:50,028
please, please, please!
657
00:23:50,030 --> 00:23:52,498
Okay.
Yay!
658
00:23:52,633 --> 00:23:54,366
All right.
658
00:23:55,305 --> 00:24:55,153
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