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1
00:00:05,797 --> 00:00:08,341
-Look, man, I heard you out.
2
00:00:08,425 --> 00:00:10,218
And I didn't rule in your favor.
3
00:00:10,301 --> 00:00:12,470
Bye, bitch.
-Bitch?
4
00:00:12,554 --> 00:00:14,681
-Next!
-Nope! Ain't no next!
5
00:00:14,764 --> 00:00:17,392
Ay, brother, ay, ay,
ain't no next. I apologize.
6
00:00:17,475 --> 00:00:19,936
Uh, I need to get a pom-pom
uniform for my daughter.
7
00:00:20,019 --> 00:00:22,063
-It's fine, Daddy.
He's ignorant.
8
00:00:22,147 --> 00:00:23,732
-Maybe I am.
-You are.
9
00:00:23,815 --> 00:00:25,525
Hey, everybody in the store,
pay attention.
10
00:00:25,608 --> 00:00:26,776
Here's an announcement.
11
00:00:26,860 --> 00:00:28,319
Herbert's dumb ass
doesn't understand
12
00:00:28,403 --> 00:00:30,071
that since this says DBA
on my check,
13
00:00:30,155 --> 00:00:32,574
it stands for
"doing business as."
14
00:00:32,657 --> 00:00:34,659
He thinks I stole it
from somebody named Deeba.
15
00:00:34,743 --> 00:00:36,411
-I know a girl
named Deeba Jones.
16
00:00:36,494 --> 00:00:38,079
Went to Kenwood,
with the fat ass.
17
00:00:38,163 --> 00:00:39,956
She gets her checks stolen
all the time.
18
00:00:40,039 --> 00:00:42,083
Either way, it ain't you.
-Oh, my God!
19
00:00:42,167 --> 00:00:44,043
DBA is explained on the chart
right behind you.
20
00:00:44,127 --> 00:00:46,921
Just turn your broke neck ass
around!
21
00:00:47,005 --> 00:00:48,631
-Oh, I-I can't turn around.
22
00:00:48,715 --> 00:00:50,216
My back won't let me
turn around.
23
00:00:50,300 --> 00:00:52,260
-Use your neck.
-I gotta walk like this.
24
00:00:52,343 --> 00:00:54,679
-One of these will get me
where I need to be.
25
00:00:54,763 --> 00:00:55,972
Goddamn, you an asshole.
26
00:00:56,055 --> 00:00:57,474
Just turn around
for a little bit.
27
00:00:57,557 --> 00:00:58,808
You lucky this glass is here.
28
00:00:58,892 --> 00:01:00,602
-Yeah, you lucky
this glass is here.
29
00:01:00,685 --> 00:01:02,270
-Oh, really?
-Yeah.
30
00:01:02,353 --> 00:01:05,607
This is one way -- Yeah, no,
it's one way bulletproof glass.
31
00:01:05,690 --> 00:01:07,358
-Oh, I didn't know that.
-Yeah, so it's going that way
32
00:01:07,442 --> 00:01:09,903
and nothing's coming --
[ Imitating gunshots ]
33
00:01:11,529 --> 00:01:13,198
-Where in the hell
are you aiming?
34
00:01:13,281 --> 00:01:16,576
And you got bullets here, here,
over there, across the street.
35
00:01:16,659 --> 00:01:17,869
Where are -- You didn't even
36
00:01:17,952 --> 00:01:19,287
put up the scopes.
-It's gigantic.
37
00:01:19,370 --> 00:01:20,789
-That lets me know
you can't shoot.
38
00:01:20,872 --> 00:01:22,749
You don't know what you doing.
-Get out of my line!
39
00:01:22,832 --> 00:01:23,917
-No!
40
00:01:24,000 --> 00:01:25,919
-Next!
-Fuck you.
41
00:01:26,002 --> 00:01:28,129
I'm taking my business
elsewhere.
42
00:01:28,213 --> 00:01:29,798
To another Currency Exchange.
43
00:01:29,881 --> 00:01:30,799
Come on, baby.
44
00:01:30,882 --> 00:01:32,884
-T-X-E-N! Next!
45
00:01:32,967 --> 00:01:34,636
-♪ I was born on
the South Side ♪
46
00:01:34,719 --> 00:01:36,221
♪ I was raised
on the South Side ♪
47
00:01:36,304 --> 00:01:38,139
♪ Everybody stick together
like we in a line ♪
48
00:01:38,223 --> 00:01:39,974
♪ 'Cause it ain't no side
like the South Side ♪
49
00:01:40,058 --> 00:01:42,769
♪ On the South Side ♪
-♪ South Side ♪
50
00:01:42,852 --> 00:01:45,063
-Let me see those pupils.
51
00:01:45,146 --> 00:01:46,981
-Did I win?
-Yeah, buddy.
52
00:01:47,065 --> 00:01:48,483
-What are you doing?
You not a paramedic.
53
00:01:48,566 --> 00:01:49,901
-I have a flashlight.
I'm looking at his --
54
00:01:49,984 --> 00:01:51,444
-Okay, that's not helpful.
-Attention.
55
00:01:51,528 --> 00:01:52,987
I want to share a few words
about a hero I know,
56
00:01:53,071 --> 00:01:54,197
and his name is Aaron.
57
00:01:54,280 --> 00:01:55,657
Poison control says
we're on our own.
58
00:01:55,740 --> 00:01:57,617
-Shit.
-He's not the smartest.
59
00:01:57,700 --> 00:01:59,536
He doesn't dress good.
But there was a coyote
60
00:01:59,619 --> 00:02:02,330
in the store this morning,
and Aaron stood his ground.
61
00:02:02,413 --> 00:02:04,707
-Yeah.
[ Scattered clapping ]
62
00:02:04,791 --> 00:02:06,084
-Alright, man, sit up.
63
00:02:06,167 --> 00:02:08,253
I need you to wake up.
Come on, get up. Wake up.
64
00:02:08,336 --> 00:02:11,881
Seriously, guys, make sure
that this guy does not go to --
65
00:02:11,965 --> 00:02:14,759
[Yawning] sleep.
-[ Yawning ] Oh, God.
66
00:02:14,843 --> 00:02:16,553
-Sorry about that. Mm.
67
00:02:16,636 --> 00:02:18,096
Didn't mean to start
a yawnmageddon.
68
00:02:18,179 --> 00:02:19,389
I have not been sleeping well.
69
00:02:19,472 --> 00:02:21,015
-Have you tried
a weighted blanket?
70
00:02:21,099 --> 00:02:22,976
It's like two dudes holding
you down while you sleep.
71
00:02:23,059 --> 00:02:24,894
-Stacy, blink once
if you in trouble,
72
00:02:24,978 --> 00:02:27,063
blink three times
if you just a freak.
73
00:02:27,146 --> 00:02:28,356
1, 2, 3. Okay.
74
00:02:28,439 --> 00:02:29,774
Alright.
-It's four, four blinks.
75
00:02:29,858 --> 00:02:32,235
-Three, three.
-Is there any sign of him yet?
76
00:02:32,318 --> 00:02:36,114
[ Coins jingling ]
77
00:02:36,197 --> 00:02:37,532
-Nope!
78
00:02:37,615 --> 00:02:40,368
Guess we should all
just head on home!
79
00:02:40,451 --> 00:02:45,665
♪♪
80
00:02:45,748 --> 00:02:50,837
♪♪
81
00:02:50,920 --> 00:02:52,755
Yeah, no sign.
82
00:02:52,839 --> 00:02:54,090
-Aaron, as a reward
for your bravery,
83
00:02:54,173 --> 00:02:55,383
you don't have to worry
about helping me
84
00:02:55,466 --> 00:02:57,051
with the exhibition
at FurnitureCon.
85
00:02:57,135 --> 00:02:58,845
Greg and Jay-Mal are gonna
pick up the slack.
86
00:02:58,928 --> 00:03:00,930
I need you two Millennials
to watch the store this week.
87
00:03:01,014 --> 00:03:02,974
Stacy's busy,
and it can't be Keisha,
88
00:03:03,057 --> 00:03:05,935
because let's face it,
she steals.
89
00:03:06,019 --> 00:03:07,312
-Hey, Turner? Turner? Turner?
90
00:03:07,395 --> 00:03:08,730
-Yeah, what's up, girl?
-Hey, girl.
91
00:03:08,813 --> 00:03:10,857
-Hey.
-So, do the cops have a gym
92
00:03:10,940 --> 00:03:12,775
where y'all practice
beating up people and stuff?
93
00:03:12,859 --> 00:03:14,152
-Mm-hmm.
-Okay, cool.
94
00:03:14,235 --> 00:03:16,905
So, I put together
an RTO pom-pom squad
95
00:03:16,988 --> 00:03:18,197
for the Juke-a-Thon,
96
00:03:18,281 --> 00:03:19,616
and I was wondering
if we could --
97
00:03:19,699 --> 00:03:21,075
-Hey, hey, sorry.
Didn't mean to interrupt.
98
00:03:21,159 --> 00:03:23,244
Hey, this is for Nina's uniform.
-Oh, thank you.
99
00:03:23,328 --> 00:03:25,204
She's so sweet.
-That's sweet.
100
00:03:25,288 --> 00:03:27,248
-Girl, she the worst one.
101
00:03:27,332 --> 00:03:29,709
She got an attitude on her.
102
00:03:29,792 --> 00:03:33,129
I be having to get
all in her face.
103
00:03:33,212 --> 00:03:34,923
Anyway...
-Stacy,
104
00:03:35,006 --> 00:03:37,592
I would love to help you
coach the pom-pom squad.
105
00:03:37,675 --> 00:03:39,010
-Help me?
-Yeah.
106
00:03:39,093 --> 00:03:40,595
I mean, you know I was
on the Hyde Park Elites
107
00:03:40,678 --> 00:03:42,931
when I was young.
-Oh. Okay.
108
00:03:43,014 --> 00:03:44,766
They killed at the Juke-a-Thon
last year.
109
00:03:44,849 --> 00:03:47,644
-We can use the gym,
but on one condition.
110
00:03:47,727 --> 00:03:49,228
We gotta be nice
to the girls, okay?
111
00:03:49,312 --> 00:03:50,772
No more getting up in faces.
112
00:03:50,855 --> 00:03:53,066
-That shit works, okay?
113
00:03:53,149 --> 00:03:57,445
Some of these girls are cool,
but a few of them will test you.
114
00:03:57,528 --> 00:03:58,613
-And I'm hearing you, okay?
115
00:03:58,696 --> 00:04:02,116
But we are going to
lift these girls
116
00:04:02,200 --> 00:04:05,745
emotionally
and physically, okay?
117
00:04:05,828 --> 00:04:07,205
I'll see you at practice,
boo-boo.
118
00:04:07,288 --> 00:04:09,290
-Girl, ain't no lifts
in the routine.
119
00:04:09,374 --> 00:04:11,292
-Girl, we don't know what's
in the routine yet.
120
00:04:11,376 --> 00:04:13,169
-As you guys know,
RTO will have a booth
121
00:04:13,252 --> 00:04:18,800
at FurnitureCon, nay, the booth,
for I am creating a masterpiece.
122
00:04:18,883 --> 00:04:20,635
Behold.
123
00:04:20,718 --> 00:04:22,387
The Sarcophacouch.
-[ Gasps ]
124
00:04:22,470 --> 00:04:26,432
Oh, no, no, no.
You crazy, sick fuck!
125
00:04:26,516 --> 00:04:30,019
-The four-person standing couch?
126
00:04:30,103 --> 00:04:32,480
The holy grail of
the furniture industry?
127
00:04:32,563 --> 00:04:34,232
-Yes.
-I see you solved the ergonomic
128
00:04:34,315 --> 00:04:36,025
conundrum by making it
a pyramid.
129
00:04:36,109 --> 00:04:37,610
It's the most sacred shape.
130
00:04:37,694 --> 00:04:39,070
Praise Hotep.
131
00:04:39,153 --> 00:04:40,530
But this is dangerous.
132
00:04:40,613 --> 00:04:43,074
That shape is not
to be trifled with.
133
00:04:43,157 --> 00:04:45,159
-Stop. I'm not with Hotep.
134
00:04:45,243 --> 00:04:46,869
I fuck with Jesus Christ.
135
00:04:46,953 --> 00:04:48,079
Capiche?
136
00:04:48,162 --> 00:04:49,414
-Anubis forgive us.
137
00:04:49,497 --> 00:04:50,665
-What are the specs?
138
00:04:50,748 --> 00:04:52,333
-Leather adjustable-height
head rest,
139
00:04:52,417 --> 00:04:53,626
food trays and snack trays,
140
00:04:53,710 --> 00:04:55,586
because those aren't
the same thing.
141
00:04:55,670 --> 00:04:58,840
A USB keyboard, HDMI, HTML,
142
00:04:58,923 --> 00:05:02,218
D4L, liquid cooling,
and temple massager.
143
00:05:02,301 --> 00:05:05,388
-I think this is the year
you win the Furny.
144
00:05:05,471 --> 00:05:07,140
-Trinkets and baubles
are nice, Gregory,
145
00:05:07,223 --> 00:05:11,352
but after this, the whole world
will know my name.
146
00:05:11,436 --> 00:05:15,314
Goddamn, there's a lot
of roaches in here.
147
00:05:15,398 --> 00:05:17,191
-Kitty, time check.
-8:45.
148
00:05:17,275 --> 00:05:18,693
-Climate check.
-70.
149
00:05:18,776 --> 00:05:20,028
-Okay, I just had
a substantial BM,
150
00:05:20,111 --> 00:05:21,654
I read a chapter
of Josh's algebra book,
151
00:05:21,738 --> 00:05:23,364
and I had a mug
of chamomile tea.
152
00:05:23,448 --> 00:05:25,575
I have not looked at my phone
for approximately 46 minutes,
153
00:05:25,658 --> 00:05:27,118
per the Internet.
-We got rain sounds.
154
00:05:27,201 --> 00:05:28,369
-Great.
-White noise --
155
00:05:28,453 --> 00:05:31,080
-And a beej?
-Uh, you do me first?
156
00:05:31,164 --> 00:05:32,457
-Let's just do this.
-Alright.
157
00:05:32,540 --> 00:05:33,791
-Alright.
158
00:05:33,875 --> 00:05:36,669
Okay, Kitty, apply the blanket.
159
00:05:39,464 --> 00:05:41,215
Yeah, I-I mean, it's, uh...
160
00:05:43,426 --> 00:05:45,511
No way.
161
00:05:45,595 --> 00:05:46,888
-What do you want for lunch?
162
00:05:46,971 --> 00:05:50,391
-7 and 1, 2, 3, 4, 5, 6, 7,
163
00:05:50,475 --> 00:05:54,729
and 1, 2, 3, 4, 5, 6 --
164
00:05:54,812 --> 00:05:56,481
Stop.
165
00:06:00,234 --> 00:06:02,737
People from all over
the South Side
166
00:06:02,820 --> 00:06:04,655
to see the Juke-a-Thon.
167
00:06:04,739 --> 00:06:08,493
Everybody and they mama
wants to see which teams
168
00:06:08,576 --> 00:06:11,370
are gonna show up and show out.
169
00:06:11,454 --> 00:06:12,997
But y'all don't care.
170
00:06:13,081 --> 00:06:16,501
Instead, y'all woke up
this morning like,
171
00:06:16,584 --> 00:06:18,753
"Oh, I'm gonna mess up.
172
00:06:18,836 --> 00:06:20,213
Stacy won't notice,
173
00:06:20,296 --> 00:06:23,549
'cause she's a stupid bitch
who don't pay attention!"
174
00:06:23,633 --> 00:06:25,259
-No, no, no, no, no, no.
-But I'm paying attention!
175
00:06:25,343 --> 00:06:26,511
All eyes on y'all!
176
00:06:26,594 --> 00:06:28,346
-Hey, hey, hey, everybody.
177
00:06:28,429 --> 00:06:32,058
So, um, ladies, now,
what I saw --
178
00:06:32,141 --> 00:06:34,727
-Who is you?
-Excuse me?
179
00:06:34,811 --> 00:06:37,939
-I mean, you're in our business
giving instruction.
180
00:06:38,022 --> 00:06:41,317
Are we supposed to be listening
to this lady with ashy ankles?
181
00:06:41,400 --> 00:06:43,694
[ Laughter ]
-Okay, they're not ashy.
182
00:06:43,778 --> 00:06:46,614
-Her legs look like a whole-ass
ghost, and I'm scared.
183
00:06:46,697 --> 00:06:48,407
-Sidebar. Come over here.
I need to talk to you.
184
00:06:48,491 --> 00:06:50,243
Okay, one second. Real quick.
-Yes.
185
00:06:50,326 --> 00:06:52,036
-Okay. You gotta retaliate
186
00:06:52,120 --> 00:06:54,080
or else they not gonna
respect you.
187
00:06:54,163 --> 00:06:56,874
Yeah, listen, Nina mama
got kicked off the CTA
188
00:06:56,958 --> 00:06:58,251
for doing nails on empty buses.
189
00:06:58,334 --> 00:06:59,585
Use that. That's ammo.
190
00:06:59,669 --> 00:07:01,212
-No. No, absolutely not, okay?
191
00:07:01,295 --> 00:07:03,339
We're gonna do things different.
We're goddamn adults.
192
00:07:03,422 --> 00:07:04,674
I'm not letting them drag me
back down, okay?
193
00:07:04,757 --> 00:07:06,092
It's fucking children
here, okay?
194
00:07:06,175 --> 00:07:07,593
-Fine. You let them talk --
-Okay, ladies --
195
00:07:07,677 --> 00:07:09,220
-[ Screams ] It's a ghost.
196
00:07:09,303 --> 00:07:11,973
It's a ghost.
I'm hearing a ghost.
197
00:07:12,056 --> 00:07:13,766
I think --
I think we're hearing a ghost.
198
00:07:13,850 --> 00:07:14,976
-Right. Okay.
199
00:07:15,059 --> 00:07:16,435
Very clever.
Look, get it all out.
200
00:07:16,519 --> 00:07:17,854
Get it all out.
-It's a ghost.
201
00:07:17,937 --> 00:07:20,439
-I'm a ghost. Casper's my
baby daddy. Whoo-hoo-hoo.
202
00:07:20,523 --> 00:07:22,817
[ Indistinct conversations,
telephones ringing ]
203
00:07:22,900 --> 00:07:25,736
[ Glass shatters ]
204
00:07:25,820 --> 00:07:27,029
-[ Snoring ]
205
00:07:27,113 --> 00:07:28,948
-We're worse than
the Currency Exchange.
206
00:07:29,031 --> 00:07:30,283
At least they cash checks.
207
00:07:30,366 --> 00:07:32,368
All we do is
put people in debt, man.
208
00:07:32,451 --> 00:07:33,953
-News flash, nigga,
this place sucks.
209
00:07:34,036 --> 00:07:35,830
-Yeah. While we're
on the subject, did you, uh,
210
00:07:35,913 --> 00:07:37,957
give Geno permission
to be behind the desk?
211
00:07:38,040 --> 00:07:39,542
-Nope.
-Yeah, yeah. I'm good.
212
00:07:39,625 --> 00:07:41,419
Come through.
Well, if anything change,
213
00:07:41,502 --> 00:07:44,088
call me back on this number
and ask for Geno.
214
00:07:44,172 --> 00:07:46,215
-Did you know he got
Joust on this?
215
00:07:46,299 --> 00:07:47,675
-For real?
216
00:07:47,758 --> 00:07:50,511
♪♪
217
00:07:50,595 --> 00:07:52,388
-I can't believe
I'm still good at this.
218
00:07:52,471 --> 00:07:54,348
One egg, two egg.
219
00:07:54,432 --> 00:07:56,767
-I got an idea.
This place is ass, right?
220
00:07:56,851 --> 00:07:58,311
-Yes.
-What if I made it an ass
221
00:07:58,394 --> 00:08:00,980
we didn't mind smashing?
I mean, we're still the boss,
222
00:08:01,063 --> 00:08:02,190
until Friday.
223
00:08:02,273 --> 00:08:03,524
-Whatever it is, I'm down.
224
00:08:03,608 --> 00:08:05,484
-Good, good.
-Wait, what's the money play?
225
00:08:05,568 --> 00:08:07,570
-Ooh, brace yourself.
226
00:08:07,653 --> 00:08:11,616
It ain't one.
I just wanna see if I can do it.
227
00:08:11,699 --> 00:08:14,160
Yeah.
-What you thinking?
228
00:08:14,243 --> 00:08:16,245
'Cause I feel like
your whole mood just changed.
229
00:08:16,329 --> 00:08:18,456
-Mm.
230
00:08:18,539 --> 00:08:20,208
What are you doing here?
231
00:08:20,291 --> 00:08:23,044
-No. What are we doing here?
232
00:08:28,633 --> 00:08:30,176
-These lines are sloppy, guys.
233
00:08:30,259 --> 00:08:32,053
They told you five times.
234
00:08:32,136 --> 00:08:34,388
And that toe point
ain't sharp, Hattie.
235
00:08:34,472 --> 00:08:36,849
-Mama?
I think I twisted my ankle.
236
00:08:36,933 --> 00:08:38,476
-Oh, baby,
just stay off your leg.
237
00:08:38,559 --> 00:08:40,895
Mama get you a ice pack.
-Nuh-unh.
238
00:08:40,978 --> 00:08:42,939
Unh-unh.
239
00:08:44,857 --> 00:08:47,985
Everyone, I think
Hattie's being a quitter,
240
00:08:48,069 --> 00:08:49,237
so we're all gonna
give her our backs.
241
00:08:49,320 --> 00:08:50,780
Everybody turn your backs
to Hattie.
242
00:08:50,863 --> 00:08:53,032
No eye contact.
She does not deserve that.
243
00:08:53,115 --> 00:08:54,200
-Unh-unh.
244
00:08:54,283 --> 00:08:55,952
-Off my court.
245
00:08:58,829 --> 00:09:00,748
-I thought y'all
were my friends.
246
00:09:00,831 --> 00:09:02,500
-Come here.
247
00:09:02,583 --> 00:09:03,626
You thought wrong.
-Unh-unh.
248
00:09:03,709 --> 00:09:04,627
-Go sit with your mom.
249
00:09:04,710 --> 00:09:05,962
-Come on. Sit down right here.
250
00:09:06,045 --> 00:09:07,463
Let me look at your leg.
-What are you doing?
251
00:09:07,546 --> 00:09:09,590
-What? I said it super nice.
252
00:09:09,674 --> 00:09:11,425
I didn't call her a bitch
or nothing this time.
253
00:09:11,509 --> 00:09:13,052
Girl, do your thing.
254
00:09:13,135 --> 00:09:17,598
♪♪
255
00:09:17,682 --> 00:09:19,767
-Muffin Mechanics is
a small business, okay?
256
00:09:19,850 --> 00:09:22,853
So you gotta think like
a small business. Got me?
257
00:09:22,937 --> 00:09:25,481
Carla's Homemade Glue Sticks.
258
00:09:25,564 --> 00:09:26,857
I see you can't
stick to a budget.
259
00:09:26,941 --> 00:09:29,443
Dean's Fake Traffic Cones.
260
00:09:29,527 --> 00:09:30,945
Uh, man, you're gonna
need an attorney,
261
00:09:31,028 --> 00:09:32,822
and let me tell you,
I am not an attorney.
262
00:09:32,905 --> 00:09:34,282
I cannot give you legal advice.
263
00:09:34,365 --> 00:09:35,992
But you know what?
You can take it to Indiana.
264
00:09:36,075 --> 00:09:37,702
They don't give a fuck
over there.
265
00:09:37,785 --> 00:09:40,579
You can do anything you want.
-Hey, nice suit, John Wick.
266
00:09:40,663 --> 00:09:42,832
Where your dog at? It's dead.
I'm joking. Get out of here.
267
00:09:42,915 --> 00:09:45,793
-It's my only suit.
It's for funerals.
268
00:09:45,876 --> 00:09:48,963
-Your Uncle Spike said you need
to give me a job and a real name
269
00:09:49,046 --> 00:09:52,300
so I can have an I-9
and some legitimate income.
270
00:09:52,383 --> 00:09:55,303
-Perfect timing. You're hired.
271
00:09:55,386 --> 00:09:58,681
-Ladies, um, we're gonna break
up into groups by age, okay?
272
00:09:58,764 --> 00:10:00,099
So, everybody,
go to your groups.
273
00:10:00,182 --> 00:10:03,811
Nina, you doing good.
274
00:10:03,894 --> 00:10:05,229
Okay.
275
00:10:05,313 --> 00:10:07,773
Um, just keep being nice.
276
00:10:07,857 --> 00:10:09,942
-Just keep the cash flowing.
277
00:10:10,026 --> 00:10:11,485
-I fucking knew. I knew.
278
00:10:11,569 --> 00:10:13,362
I knew she was being
too damn nice.
279
00:10:13,446 --> 00:10:14,822
She don't even like these shoes.
280
00:10:14,905 --> 00:10:16,157
She complimented me today.
281
00:10:16,240 --> 00:10:18,492
You paying her?
282
00:10:18,576 --> 00:10:19,785
-Yeah, keep that shit down.
283
00:10:19,869 --> 00:10:21,078
I can't pay
all these goddamn kids.
284
00:10:21,162 --> 00:10:22,455
What's wrong with you?
285
00:10:22,538 --> 00:10:24,165
Besides, I figured,
Simon's daughter, shit,
286
00:10:24,248 --> 00:10:25,791
she know how to talk
that money talk.
287
00:10:25,875 --> 00:10:27,835
-You know, cussing they ass
out is much cheaper,
288
00:10:27,918 --> 00:10:30,004
but do your thing, moneybags.
-Thank you.
289
00:10:30,087 --> 00:10:31,297
Just support my vision.
290
00:10:31,380 --> 00:10:33,090
God damn.
-You got it.
291
00:10:33,174 --> 00:10:36,177
-Okay, everybody
looks super great.
292
00:10:36,260 --> 00:10:38,012
-Where you going?
What you doing?
293
00:10:38,095 --> 00:10:40,890
-Here's the thing you got
to know about coyotes.
294
00:10:40,973 --> 00:10:45,353
When they're out there
singing, yipping,
295
00:10:45,436 --> 00:10:47,938
they're counting us.
296
00:10:48,022 --> 00:10:50,858
-Ah, here we go. Yes.
297
00:10:50,941 --> 00:10:52,193
-This nigga.
298
00:10:52,276 --> 00:10:54,153
-Ugh. Herbert.
299
00:10:54,236 --> 00:10:55,488
I'm not "this" n-word.
300
00:10:55,571 --> 00:10:57,448
I'm "your" n-word.
You're here for a reason.
301
00:10:57,531 --> 00:10:59,867
-Yeah. I heard y'all bitch-ass
was doing financial planning.
302
00:10:59,950 --> 00:11:01,494
-The potty talk
is not necessary.
303
00:11:01,577 --> 00:11:03,662
You don't have to go there.
-Don't tell me how to talk.
304
00:11:03,746 --> 00:11:04,830
-Absolutely. No problem.
305
00:11:04,914 --> 00:11:07,083
Okay, so let's see
what we got here.
306
00:11:07,166 --> 00:11:10,211
Ah, yes.
I see your savings are in cash.
307
00:11:10,294 --> 00:11:13,381
You know, like Ray Dalio said,
"Cash is trash."
308
00:11:13,464 --> 00:11:14,715
-Who is Ray Dalio?
309
00:11:14,799 --> 00:11:16,217
-You like rap.
-No.
310
00:11:16,300 --> 00:11:20,096
-Mm. Okay. Um, he's
the Dolly Parton of finance.
311
00:11:20,179 --> 00:11:22,056
-Oh.
312
00:11:22,139 --> 00:11:24,058
Big ass titties.
-Yeah.
313
00:11:24,141 --> 00:11:26,227
Big ass financial titties.
314
00:11:26,310 --> 00:11:28,020
-I'm sold.
-Uh, you may want to consider
315
00:11:28,104 --> 00:11:29,355
a certificate of deposit.
316
00:11:29,438 --> 00:11:30,773
-A CD.
-Yeah.
317
00:11:30,856 --> 00:11:33,192
-A cee-deez.
-You bet not.
318
00:11:33,275 --> 00:11:34,902
-See deez.
-Don't.
319
00:11:34,985 --> 00:11:36,153
I see it. Don't do it.
320
00:11:36,237 --> 00:11:37,446
-See deez nuts, nigga.
321
00:11:37,530 --> 00:11:38,948
-[ Growls ]
322
00:11:39,031 --> 00:11:40,157
[ Mutters angrily ]
323
00:11:40,241 --> 00:11:41,909
-[ Chuckles ]
324
00:11:41,992 --> 00:11:43,411
-[ Sighs ] Okay. Mm.
325
00:11:43,494 --> 00:11:45,287
Brother, you seem hostile.
326
00:11:45,371 --> 00:11:47,456
-Oh, I seem hos--
I do seem hostile.
327
00:11:47,540 --> 00:11:50,584
Maybe it's 'cause
I am hostile, nigga.
328
00:11:50,668 --> 00:11:53,337
I'm mad --
I'm sad, to be honest.
329
00:11:53,421 --> 00:11:55,673
I hate my life.
Why do I have two name tags on?
330
00:11:55,756 --> 00:11:56,924
-Break it down, brother.
Come on.
331
00:11:57,007 --> 00:11:58,092
-They both say
Currency Exchange.
332
00:11:58,175 --> 00:11:59,718
-Mm.
-My favorite restaurant
333
00:11:59,802 --> 00:12:00,886
is Italian Fiesta,
334
00:12:00,970 --> 00:12:02,179
on the South Side.
-Love that place.
335
00:12:02,263 --> 00:12:03,431
-Them two words
don't go together.
336
00:12:03,514 --> 00:12:04,849
-Absolutely.
-One is Italian,
337
00:12:04,932 --> 00:12:07,935
one is Mexican.
I use to like Lou Malnati's.
338
00:12:08,018 --> 00:12:09,895
I can't say it.
It sound like Illuminati.
339
00:12:09,979 --> 00:12:11,480
-Ah.
-Every time I eat that pizza,
340
00:12:11,564 --> 00:12:13,441
I feel like I know too much.
-I'm holding the bucket,
341
00:12:13,524 --> 00:12:14,984
brother. Go ahead
and fill it up.
342
00:12:15,067 --> 00:12:16,318
-They don't
appreciate me at work.
343
00:12:16,402 --> 00:12:18,279
-Mm.
-You know why I smile so much?
344
00:12:18,362 --> 00:12:19,822
-Please tell me.
-Tears of a clown.
345
00:12:19,905 --> 00:12:21,323
-Mm.
-These glasses don't work.
346
00:12:21,407 --> 00:12:23,242
You blurry to me right now.
I could be talking
347
00:12:23,325 --> 00:12:25,786
to Scottie Pippen. I don't know.
-Mm. Okay.
348
00:12:25,870 --> 00:12:28,330
-I'm at war with a nigga
that don't even work in money,
349
00:12:28,414 --> 00:12:30,082
and he know more
about money than me.
350
00:12:30,166 --> 00:12:31,834
-Mm.
351
00:12:31,917 --> 00:12:33,127
-Thanks --
Thanks for listening, man.
352
00:12:33,210 --> 00:12:34,753
-No problem.
353
00:12:34,837 --> 00:12:36,964
-Fo sho.
354
00:12:37,047 --> 00:12:40,342
You shake hands like a bitch.
355
00:12:40,426 --> 00:12:41,385
-I didn't hear that.
356
00:12:41,469 --> 00:12:42,845
Alright, everybody,
357
00:12:42,928 --> 00:12:45,181
my experiment with the store
is moving into phase two.
358
00:12:45,264 --> 00:12:47,349
Unreturned items
don't make us shit.
359
00:12:47,433 --> 00:12:49,727
So, I present to you --
360
00:12:49,810 --> 00:12:52,438
boom -- Amnesty Day.
361
00:12:52,521 --> 00:12:54,482
Bring it back,
no questions asked.
362
00:12:54,565 --> 00:12:56,400
The store gets the merch
back in circulation,
363
00:12:56,484 --> 00:12:58,152
and the customers' debts
are forgiven.
364
00:12:58,235 --> 00:13:00,863
Oh, and a very important point,
it's gonna happen this Friday
365
00:13:00,946 --> 00:13:02,198
while Q is at FurnitureCon,
366
00:13:02,281 --> 00:13:03,824
so let's keep that
under the radar.
367
00:13:03,908 --> 00:13:06,494
-Just don't forget, Nina's show
is also this Friday.
368
00:13:06,577 --> 00:13:08,329
-I know that.
But she understands
369
00:13:08,412 --> 00:13:10,915
that everything I do
ultimately is for her.
370
00:13:10,998 --> 00:13:13,083
You think Jaden Smith was happy
371
00:13:13,167 --> 00:13:15,419
with Will only coming home
three days a month?
372
00:13:15,503 --> 00:13:19,131
No. But bam-boom-bip,
"Karate Kid." Wa-ha.
373
00:13:19,215 --> 00:13:20,174
-If you say so.
374
00:13:20,257 --> 00:13:21,675
-Jah-damn it.
375
00:13:21,759 --> 00:13:23,135
-"Jah" damn it?
376
00:13:23,219 --> 00:13:24,470
Jah is Jamaican.
377
00:13:24,553 --> 00:13:26,180
You in Jamaica or Egypt?
378
00:13:26,263 --> 00:13:27,556
What are you doing?
379
00:13:27,640 --> 00:13:29,016
-Uh, we're dealing
with a pyramid,
380
00:13:29,099 --> 00:13:31,352
so I'm imbuing it
with the wisdom of Horus.
381
00:13:31,435 --> 00:13:34,396
This symbol might be the only
thing that saves our lives.
382
00:13:34,480 --> 00:13:40,569
♪♪
383
00:13:40,653 --> 00:13:43,030
-Alright, let's roll.
Stay frosty out there.
384
00:13:43,113 --> 00:13:46,283
Oh, if anybody wants to sign up
for police union credit cards,
385
00:13:46,367 --> 00:13:49,745
introductory APY is 16.7%.
See me.
386
00:13:49,828 --> 00:13:51,247
Hey, Goodnight.
-Yeah?
387
00:13:51,330 --> 00:13:53,916
-You're having a great week.
-Yes, sir. Thank you.
388
00:13:53,999 --> 00:13:55,292
-Took two guns off the street,
389
00:13:55,376 --> 00:13:57,169
set a record at this morning's
live fire drill.
390
00:13:57,253 --> 00:13:58,629
You are tearing ass lately.
391
00:13:58,712 --> 00:14:00,130
-Well, you know, I've been
working on my tac reloads
392
00:14:00,214 --> 00:14:01,840
and my failure drills.
But the real secret
393
00:14:01,924 --> 00:14:04,385
is I am getting fantastic sleep.
-That's great. That's wonderful.
394
00:14:04,468 --> 00:14:05,886
-I mean, I'm up,
I'm all the way up.
395
00:14:05,970 --> 00:14:07,513
Hearing is up. Awareness is up.
-Yeah. Listen up,
396
00:14:07,596 --> 00:14:09,723
I got something special for you.
-Oh, yeah.
397
00:14:09,807 --> 00:14:12,268
-Alright? Putting you
on the mayor's detail
398
00:14:12,351 --> 00:14:14,061
for the Bulls-Bucks game.
399
00:14:14,144 --> 00:14:15,604
We got a foreign
dignitary coming, too.
400
00:14:15,688 --> 00:14:16,814
The mayor of Milwaukee.
401
00:14:16,897 --> 00:14:18,274
Congrats.
-Oh, my God. Thank you, sir.
402
00:14:18,357 --> 00:14:19,483
I appreciate the vote
of confidence.
403
00:14:19,567 --> 00:14:21,151
-It's a fun duty.
-I'm gonna --
404
00:14:21,235 --> 00:14:23,070
-She loves the force, really
gets along with all the guys.
405
00:14:23,153 --> 00:14:25,155
You'll have a great time.
-Thank you.
406
00:14:26,699 --> 00:14:28,617
[ Grunting ]
407
00:14:28,701 --> 00:14:29,785
Come on!
408
00:14:29,868 --> 00:14:39,461
♪♪
409
00:14:39,545 --> 00:14:41,714
[ Cheers and applause ]
410
00:14:41,797 --> 00:14:46,093
♪♪
411
00:14:46,176 --> 00:14:47,928
[ Camera shutter clicking ]
-Thank you!
412
00:14:48,012 --> 00:14:49,888
Thank you, parents! Thank you!
413
00:14:49,972 --> 00:14:52,766
Hey, Leandra! Girl, hi.
414
00:14:52,850 --> 00:14:54,435
I don't know you, but hey,
how you doing?
415
00:14:54,518 --> 00:14:57,771
Thank you so much for coming
to our last practice
416
00:14:57,855 --> 00:15:00,357
before tomorrow's Juke-a-Thon.
417
00:15:00,441 --> 00:15:01,525
Yeah!
418
00:15:01,609 --> 00:15:03,861
Okay, now, if you have
any criticism
419
00:15:03,944 --> 00:15:07,698
besides "That shit was raw,"
please keep it to yourselves.
420
00:15:07,781 --> 00:15:10,701
Thank you, parents,
so much for coming out.
421
00:15:10,784 --> 00:15:15,456
-Man, it was so on point, so
tight, but -- but still fluid.
422
00:15:15,539 --> 00:15:17,291
Look, it was just --
it -- it was amazing.
423
00:15:17,374 --> 00:15:18,834
Alright, y'all,
so go get some --
424
00:15:18,917 --> 00:15:21,253
We got some fish, some fish
sandwiches in the back,
425
00:15:21,337 --> 00:15:22,921
um, from Dock's.
Go get a fish sandwich.
426
00:15:23,005 --> 00:15:25,674
Come on. I know y'all hungry.
Y'all earned them!
427
00:15:25,758 --> 00:15:27,926
So good.
428
00:15:28,010 --> 00:15:30,346
Here you go.
-I don't want it.
429
00:15:30,429 --> 00:15:34,183
I just wanted to say thank you
for my solo.
430
00:15:34,266 --> 00:15:36,477
-Girl, come here.
-You so thirsty.
431
00:15:36,560 --> 00:15:38,395
-Girl, shut up
and let me love you.
432
00:15:38,479 --> 00:15:39,813
-Fine, fine.
433
00:15:39,897 --> 00:15:41,940
-Sandy, it's 1:37.
434
00:15:42,024 --> 00:15:43,984
You have to be at the
United Center first thing.
435
00:15:44,068 --> 00:15:46,195
-I know, I know.
-You're playing with fire.
436
00:15:46,278 --> 00:15:47,821
-I know. It's not me.
437
00:15:47,905 --> 00:15:50,240
It's Turner.
She keeps skipping night patrols
438
00:15:50,324 --> 00:15:52,242
so she can do her stupid
pom-pom thing,
439
00:15:52,326 --> 00:15:53,661
so I'm stuck doing it
all by myself.
440
00:15:53,744 --> 00:15:55,371
Tonight, I had to get a cat
out of a tree,
441
00:15:55,454 --> 00:15:57,039
but then I had to put it back
because that was his home.
442
00:15:57,122 --> 00:15:58,832
-I'm gonna grab the blanket.
-No, no.
443
00:15:58,916 --> 00:16:01,168
No. We don't need that.
It's too powerful.
444
00:16:01,251 --> 00:16:06,006
Besides, I've already banked
so much quality sleep,
445
00:16:06,090 --> 00:16:08,509
I got tons of reserves.
-That's not how sleep works.
446
00:16:08,592 --> 00:16:09,968
-You sure about that?
-Yeah.
447
00:16:10,052 --> 00:16:11,553
-I'll tell you what --
read that thing to me.
448
00:16:11,637 --> 00:16:13,722
-Okay.
-That'll knock me right out.
449
00:16:13,806 --> 00:16:16,308
-"And so, I asked
my barber Craigmond,
450
00:16:16,392 --> 00:16:19,144
how was I gonna be balance
being so heavy-handed
451
00:16:19,228 --> 00:16:20,854
while still being Lightfooted.
452
00:16:20,938 --> 00:16:24,400
You see, Preckwinkle wanted us
to Chica-stop.
453
00:16:24,483 --> 00:16:26,485
Girl, I wanted to Chica-go."
454
00:16:26,568 --> 00:16:28,696
[ Alarm rings ]
455
00:16:28,779 --> 00:16:30,155
-[ Grunts ]
456
00:16:30,239 --> 00:16:32,533
Yo, Josh, get in here
and finish your cereal, man.
457
00:16:32,616 --> 00:16:36,245
It's gonna get co--
It's gonna get soggy.
458
00:16:36,328 --> 00:16:39,123
Okay. Game is in three hours.
459
00:16:39,206 --> 00:16:42,710
Let's see. Good day.
460
00:16:42,793 --> 00:16:44,545
[ Car horn beeps ]
461
00:16:46,630 --> 00:16:47,881
Aah! Aah!
462
00:16:47,965 --> 00:16:50,217
Oh, no! I slept for 30 minutes.
463
00:16:50,300 --> 00:16:52,594
Okay. That is okay.
464
00:16:52,678 --> 00:16:55,222
I just need some coffee.
465
00:16:55,305 --> 00:16:56,932
Okay.
466
00:16:58,183 --> 00:17:00,060
Where's my cup, man?
467
00:17:00,144 --> 00:17:02,229
That's, uh...
468
00:17:02,312 --> 00:17:06,316
♪♪
469
00:17:06,400 --> 00:17:08,444
[ Dog barking ]
470
00:17:11,739 --> 00:17:13,365
No! No, no!
471
00:17:13,449 --> 00:17:15,075
Oh, my God. I slept standing up
for 19 minutes.
472
00:17:15,159 --> 00:17:17,077
How the hell did I do that?
473
00:17:17,161 --> 00:17:19,079
My body's fighting back.
474
00:17:19,163 --> 00:17:20,789
It wants that extra sleep.
475
00:17:20,873 --> 00:17:22,291
I'm in charge!
476
00:17:22,374 --> 00:17:24,251
[ Grunting ]
477
00:17:24,334 --> 00:17:25,753
You work for me!
478
00:17:25,836 --> 00:17:27,921
Okay. Just relax.
479
00:17:28,005 --> 00:17:31,175
You can do this.
Goodnight, don't be crazy.
480
00:17:31,258 --> 00:17:33,594
You gotta just wake up.
Just think.
481
00:17:33,677 --> 00:17:35,554
All I gotta do is think.
482
00:17:35,637 --> 00:17:46,023
♪♪
483
00:17:46,106 --> 00:17:47,441
Oh, no!
484
00:17:47,524 --> 00:17:49,777
My eyes were open that time!
485
00:17:51,862 --> 00:17:53,489
-Hey, man, we're here
for the convention.
486
00:17:53,572 --> 00:17:54,865
Where do we set up?
487
00:17:54,948 --> 00:17:56,450
-Wow. Y'all are early.
488
00:17:56,533 --> 00:17:59,119
-Rise early, work hard,
strike oil.
489
00:17:59,203 --> 00:18:01,663
-Alright, look,
I'm not supposed to do this,
490
00:18:01,747 --> 00:18:03,207
but I can see y'all got
something pretty special
491
00:18:03,290 --> 00:18:06,085
under the hood.
I'm-a give you a center spot.
492
00:18:06,168 --> 00:18:07,252
-Yes.
493
00:18:07,336 --> 00:18:08,670
Start unloading the truck.
494
00:18:08,754 --> 00:18:10,964
-It's pretty cool, huh?
-No, nigga.
495
00:18:11,048 --> 00:18:12,424
-I don't like that word.
496
00:18:12,508 --> 00:18:15,803
-Oh, my bad, ho.
497
00:18:15,886 --> 00:18:17,846
-Alright, right this way.
We'll get you all set up.
498
00:18:17,930 --> 00:18:19,598
Any place you want.
I got you, man.
499
00:18:19,681 --> 00:18:21,308
I mean, personally, I think
the center of the room is best,
500
00:18:21,391 --> 00:18:24,353
but, you know, dealer's choice.
Up to you. Got you.
501
00:18:24,436 --> 00:18:26,355
-You, sir, have just
earned yourself
502
00:18:26,438 --> 00:18:28,357
the honorary first
"sitsperience."
503
00:18:28,440 --> 00:18:30,734
-What? Ooh. [ Chuckles ]
504
00:18:30,818 --> 00:18:34,655
-This is where all my dreams
come true!
505
00:18:34,738 --> 00:18:37,699
-Alright, twirl, big man.
You happy.
506
00:18:37,783 --> 00:18:39,493
-Let's unload the truck!
507
00:18:39,576 --> 00:18:42,246
♪♪
508
00:18:42,329 --> 00:18:44,873
-Welcome to the festival
of forgiveness.
509
00:18:44,957 --> 00:18:47,543
Scary Barry, ring the bell.
510
00:18:47,626 --> 00:18:49,962
[ Bell jingling ]
511
00:18:53,048 --> 00:18:54,633
Barry, Barry, Barry.
512
00:18:54,716 --> 00:18:56,635
Entirely too much bell.
513
00:18:56,718 --> 00:18:57,886
-I'm proud of you, bro.
-Thanks.
514
00:18:57,970 --> 00:18:59,721
-You really put a battery
in my back.
515
00:18:59,805 --> 00:19:01,682
I got plans, too. Yeah.
516
00:19:01,765 --> 00:19:03,308
I got a bid coming up
based on what I was doing
517
00:19:03,392 --> 00:19:05,352
on that phone over there,
but I'm using that to become
518
00:19:05,435 --> 00:19:07,855
a reality mogul like
Soulja Boy and Shad Moss.
519
00:19:07,938 --> 00:19:09,106
-Ah, Bow Wow.
-Mm-hmm.
520
00:19:09,189 --> 00:19:11,191
First, I'm-a go on A&E
"60 Days In,"
521
00:19:11,275 --> 00:19:13,026
then after that,
I'm going "Love After Lockup"
522
00:19:13,110 --> 00:19:14,903
and "Life After Lockup,"
then "Locked Up Abroad,"
523
00:19:14,987 --> 00:19:16,238
because you know
I like to travel.
524
00:19:16,321 --> 00:19:18,073
-Uh-huh.
-Then after that, "Hoarders,"
525
00:19:18,156 --> 00:19:19,950
because now, I got a problem.
-Mm.
526
00:19:20,033 --> 00:19:21,910
-And then, when it's all
said and done,
527
00:19:21,994 --> 00:19:24,163
I think I'm-a let Iyanla
fix my life.
528
00:19:24,246 --> 00:19:25,873
-Mm. I believe in you.
529
00:19:25,956 --> 00:19:28,083
-Proud of you, bro.
-Thanks.
530
00:19:30,043 --> 00:19:32,087
-Simon, you did it.
-Yep.
531
00:19:32,170 --> 00:19:34,214
-Too bad it all ends today.
532
00:19:34,298 --> 00:19:36,300
-At least we're going out
in a bang.
533
00:19:36,383 --> 00:19:38,051
But that's still enough time
to talk to people
534
00:19:38,135 --> 00:19:39,720
about dollar cost averaging
535
00:19:39,803 --> 00:19:43,348
and how inflation killed
real yields in the 1940s.
536
00:19:43,432 --> 00:19:45,726
-Inflation always doing
stupid shit.
537
00:19:45,809 --> 00:19:47,644
♪♪
538
00:19:47,728 --> 00:19:49,229
[ Car horns honking ]
539
00:19:49,313 --> 00:19:50,230
-[ Snores ]
540
00:19:50,314 --> 00:19:53,025
[ Police radio chatter ]
541
00:19:53,108 --> 00:20:02,242
♪♪
542
00:20:02,326 --> 00:20:11,543
♪♪
543
00:20:11,627 --> 00:20:20,594
♪♪
544
00:20:20,677 --> 00:20:22,346
-Thank you for having me
here today.
545
00:20:22,429 --> 00:20:27,142
I am honored to be an officiant
of the 24th annual Juke-a-Thon.
546
00:20:27,225 --> 00:20:29,770
The Juke-a-Thon is back.
That's right.
547
00:20:29,853 --> 00:20:33,607
I want to introduce the man,
the myth, the stalwart
548
00:20:33,690 --> 00:20:34,858
of the Juke-a-Thon himself,
549
00:20:34,942 --> 00:20:39,029
our official mascot
Juke-a-Twaan!
550
00:20:39,112 --> 00:20:40,197
[ Cheers and applause ]
551
00:20:40,280 --> 00:20:41,323
Whoo!
552
00:20:41,406 --> 00:20:43,116
Hey, hey, hey!
553
00:20:43,200 --> 00:20:44,952
Go, Juke-a-Twaan!
Go, Juke-a-Twaan!
554
00:20:45,035 --> 00:20:47,079
Go, Juke-a-Twaan!
Go, Juke-a-Twaan!
555
00:20:47,162 --> 00:20:48,538
Hey, hey! Kill it.
556
00:20:48,622 --> 00:20:49,790
Let's bust!
557
00:20:49,873 --> 00:20:52,709
♪♪
558
00:20:52,793 --> 00:20:56,338
[ Grunting ]
559
00:20:56,421 --> 00:20:58,924
Ah. Ah.
560
00:20:59,007 --> 00:21:00,300
-You alright, man?
561
00:21:00,384 --> 00:21:02,803
-Ah, I'm fine.
Oh, it hurts. Okay.
562
00:21:02,886 --> 00:21:06,348
-♪ I know you heard about it,
then we gonna drop it down ♪
563
00:21:06,431 --> 00:21:09,768
♪ Drop it down, drop it down,
drop it down, drop it down ♪
564
00:21:09,851 --> 00:21:11,770
♪♪
565
00:21:11,853 --> 00:21:14,856
-♪ To da, to da ♪
566
00:21:14,940 --> 00:21:17,317
-♪ Skrrt skrrt, skrrt skrrt ♪
567
00:21:17,401 --> 00:21:25,909
♪♪
568
00:21:25,993 --> 00:21:29,621
-Hey, ladies, we're here, okay?
569
00:21:29,705 --> 00:21:32,874
So, um, I need that T-Pain crisp
570
00:21:32,958 --> 00:21:34,835
and I want that Round House
formation,
571
00:21:34,918 --> 00:21:36,795
yes, to hit, hit, hit.
572
00:21:36,878 --> 00:21:38,296
-Motherfuckers got us.
573
00:21:38,380 --> 00:21:39,506
-Hold on. Calm down.
574
00:21:39,589 --> 00:21:41,008
Breathe. I got the boogie.
What's up?
575
00:21:41,091 --> 00:21:43,677
-That parent show was just
too damn good, okay?
576
00:21:43,760 --> 00:21:46,722
Geraldine, Neicy, and Jackie
all got poached.
577
00:21:46,805 --> 00:21:48,307
They all went to other teams.
578
00:21:48,390 --> 00:21:51,018
-Stop. W-What?
579
00:21:51,101 --> 00:21:53,854
-They went to other teams.
They're gone.
580
00:21:53,937 --> 00:21:56,440
-Listen, listen.
581
00:21:56,523 --> 00:21:58,817
After all we did
for these little bitches,
582
00:21:58,900 --> 00:22:00,402
just need
a fucking minute over here.
583
00:22:00,485 --> 00:22:02,779
God damn it! God damn it!
Just -- Fuck, fuck this bitch!
584
00:22:02,863 --> 00:22:04,406
God damn it, shit.
Fuck her whole ass!
585
00:22:04,489 --> 00:22:07,451
I will stab you,
fucking prison style!
586
00:22:07,534 --> 00:22:10,746
Fuck! You! Kids!
587
00:22:10,829 --> 00:22:11,997
Sorry, y'all.
588
00:22:12,080 --> 00:22:15,000
Y'all ain't bitches.
You ain't hoes.
589
00:22:15,083 --> 00:22:17,044
But them sons of bitches
are some fucking hoes.
590
00:22:17,127 --> 00:22:18,128
-Hattie joined
the Hyde Park Elites
591
00:22:18,211 --> 00:22:19,296
and didn't even tell her mama.
592
00:22:19,379 --> 00:22:21,506
-She had her daddy drive her.
593
00:22:23,967 --> 00:22:25,635
-I knew I shouldn't have
trusted Hattie.
594
00:22:25,719 --> 00:22:27,554
That old slave-ass name.
595
00:22:27,637 --> 00:22:29,222
-She had her daddy name her.
596
00:22:29,306 --> 00:22:31,224
-This is on me, okay?
I knew I should have took
597
00:22:31,308 --> 00:22:33,060
the audience's phones,
not just their guns.
598
00:22:33,143 --> 00:22:34,728
Wasn't nobody even checking
for these girls
599
00:22:34,811 --> 00:22:36,188
until we got them together.
600
00:22:36,271 --> 00:22:37,522
-Fuck.
601
00:22:37,606 --> 00:22:39,649
We lost all our lifters.
602
00:22:39,733 --> 00:22:42,861
We can't do half the shit
we were supposed to do.
603
00:22:42,944 --> 00:22:44,780
Alright, girls, um, we need to
talk, so everybody just --
604
00:22:44,863 --> 00:22:47,240
-No, we don't. Unh-unh.
Y'all keep stretching.
605
00:22:47,324 --> 00:22:50,202
Look, girl, Mama Stace always
got a backup plan.
606
00:22:50,285 --> 00:22:51,244
Oh, yeah.
607
00:22:51,328 --> 00:22:52,621
Always. Here you go.
-Oh. Okay.
608
00:22:52,704 --> 00:22:54,956
Okay, I see you, I see it.
-You, too, Meech.
609
00:22:55,040 --> 00:22:56,500
Here. I keep a third spare.
610
00:22:56,583 --> 00:22:58,085
That's right.
A hating-ass ho would say
611
00:22:58,168 --> 00:22:59,669
this is doing too much,
but look who laughing now.
612
00:22:59,753 --> 00:23:01,213
Let's go.
-Ha-ha-ha! We'll be right back.
613
00:23:01,296 --> 00:23:03,423
We'll be right back.
-Thank you for being honest.
614
00:23:03,507 --> 00:23:05,592
Bye-bye.
-And thank you for the shoes.
615
00:23:05,675 --> 00:23:08,261
We don't sell them, but we will.
616
00:23:08,345 --> 00:23:10,806
Shoes?
617
00:23:10,889 --> 00:23:14,309
-Thanks, bruh.
I finally gave that TV back.
618
00:23:14,392 --> 00:23:15,769
Feels pretty good
to be debt-free.
619
00:23:15,852 --> 00:23:19,272
-Oh, that's sweet.
You wanna rent anything else?
620
00:23:19,356 --> 00:23:20,899
-Nah, I'm good.
-Okay.
621
00:23:20,982 --> 00:23:22,067
Then my work here is done.
622
00:23:22,150 --> 00:23:23,443
-Yeah, man. Ay.
623
00:23:23,527 --> 00:23:25,654
You still a bitch
for causing a scene at my gig.
624
00:23:25,737 --> 00:23:28,615
-Ah. Fuck you
and your gig, chief.
625
00:23:28,698 --> 00:23:31,785
-Oh, fuck me and my gig.
Hey, look, when you die,
626
00:23:31,868 --> 00:23:35,122
I'm-a find all your baby mamas
and I'm-a treat them real --
627
00:23:35,205 --> 00:23:36,957
I'm-a take them out
to a five-star dinner.
628
00:23:37,040 --> 00:23:39,209
Yeah, maybe Red Lobster
or, you know,
629
00:23:39,292 --> 00:23:40,794
Twofish or something
like that, yeah.
630
00:23:40,877 --> 00:23:43,505
And them I'm-a get
your daughters all braces,
631
00:23:43,588 --> 00:23:46,633
ballet classes, karate classes,
whatever they need.
632
00:23:46,716 --> 00:23:48,760
I'm gonna support them.
Yeah, that's what I'm on.
633
00:23:48,844 --> 00:23:51,888
-Mm.
-I'm fucking crazy.
634
00:23:51,972 --> 00:23:54,766
-Really nice guy.
Positive attitude. Yeah.
635
00:23:54,850 --> 00:23:56,810
-Yeah. Can I give you
some advice?
636
00:23:56,893 --> 00:23:58,436
-Um, shoot your shot.
637
00:23:58,520 --> 00:23:59,896
-Well, you've been
working with people
638
00:23:59,980 --> 00:24:01,648
to figure out their priorities.
639
00:24:01,731 --> 00:24:05,485
Maybe you should do the same.
-What do you mean?
640
00:24:05,569 --> 00:24:06,820
[ Sighs ]
641
00:24:06,903 --> 00:24:08,488
-These knock-kneed
bitches is cheating.
642
00:24:08,572 --> 00:24:10,782
Coaches ain't supposed
to be dancing with the girls.
643
00:24:10,866 --> 00:24:12,450
The Tiger Queenz
should be disqualified.
644
00:24:12,534 --> 00:24:15,078
-Uh, where in the rule book
does it say coaches can't dance?
645
00:24:15,162 --> 00:24:16,413
-Mm.
-Okay, it's common sense.
646
00:24:16,496 --> 00:24:18,331
We don't need no rule book.
-Unh-unh.
647
00:24:18,415 --> 00:24:20,000
In "Air Bud,"
haters tried to stop
648
00:24:20,083 --> 00:24:22,878
a beautiful Golden Retriever
from playing basketball,
649
00:24:22,961 --> 00:24:25,255
to which the referee's
response was,
650
00:24:25,338 --> 00:24:27,674
"Ain't no rules that say dogs
can't play basketball."
651
00:24:27,757 --> 00:24:30,135
So he did.
And that's what we wanna do.
652
00:24:30,218 --> 00:24:32,762
-Mm. We invoke the Air Bud Rule.
653
00:24:32,846 --> 00:24:34,222
-Y'all wildin'.
654
00:24:34,306 --> 00:24:36,766
Mr. Allen Gayle, you the most
important person here.
655
00:24:36,850 --> 00:24:38,393
-I am?
Oh, I don't know about that.
656
00:24:38,476 --> 00:24:40,520
We got my man Big Billy
of Big Billy Auto Parts here.
657
00:24:40,604 --> 00:24:42,105
I mean, like, you know,
you've heard that commercial
658
00:24:42,189 --> 00:24:43,190
on the radio.
659
00:24:43,273 --> 00:24:45,192
♪ Big, Big Billy, Big ♪
660
00:24:45,275 --> 00:24:47,569
-♪ Big Billy,
Big Billy got auto parts ♪
661
00:24:47,652 --> 00:24:49,070
♪ Big Billy got auto parts ♪
662
00:24:49,154 --> 00:24:51,531
I'm sorry, you had a dispute.
What was -- What was it?
663
00:24:51,615 --> 00:24:53,408
-You need to decide
who gets to perform.
664
00:24:53,491 --> 00:24:55,243
-We ain't got no heating pads,
but this is a bag
665
00:24:55,327 --> 00:24:57,037
full of hot pizza puffs.
-It'll do.
666
00:24:57,120 --> 00:24:59,789
Please apply it
to my lower back, please.
667
00:24:59,873 --> 00:25:00,999
Ooh. There we go.
668
00:25:01,082 --> 00:25:03,043
-Excuse me!
-Uh, excuse you!
669
00:25:03,126 --> 00:25:04,252
This man is in pain.
670
00:25:04,336 --> 00:25:06,046
-Nobody asked you,
Reynold's Wrap.
671
00:25:06,129 --> 00:25:08,590
-You just mad I look like
my daddy and you do, too.
672
00:25:08,673 --> 00:25:10,133
-Well, you need to go on
and shut up
673
00:25:10,217 --> 00:25:11,635
and -- and just go
be a baked potato.
674
00:25:11,718 --> 00:25:13,094
-You woulda been my mama
if you didn't swallow.
675
00:25:13,178 --> 00:25:14,721
-Oh, you need to go on back
to "The Wiz"
676
00:25:14,804 --> 00:25:16,556
and ease on down the road.
-You the one who showed up
677
00:25:16,640 --> 00:25:18,391
dressed for bingo.
-Okay, guys, listen,
678
00:25:18,475 --> 00:25:20,894
this is the Juke-a-Thon,
not the Dozens-a-Thon.
679
00:25:20,977 --> 00:25:24,064
That was two weeks ago, and we
all saw how that ended, okay?
680
00:25:24,147 --> 00:25:26,566
Ma'am, I can't argue
with the Air Bud Rule.
681
00:25:26,650 --> 00:25:28,151
The logic of that film is sound,
682
00:25:28,235 --> 00:25:30,904
and I'm going to decide
in the favor of the defendants.
683
00:25:30,987 --> 00:25:33,365
Case adjourned. Play ball!
-You mad. She's mad.
684
00:25:33,448 --> 00:25:34,824
-Be mad!
685
00:25:34,908 --> 00:25:36,618
♪♪
686
00:25:36,701 --> 00:25:39,037
-Fermat's last theorem.
687
00:25:39,120 --> 00:25:42,082
The Byzantine General's Problem.
688
00:25:42,165 --> 00:25:43,917
Planck's constant.
689
00:25:44,000 --> 00:25:47,212
And the four-person
pyramidal coach.
690
00:25:47,295 --> 00:25:48,922
-Ah, yes. Great.
-Well, today,
691
00:25:49,005 --> 00:25:51,841
we can scratch the last great
quandary off the list.
692
00:25:51,925 --> 00:25:55,971
World, I give you
the Sarcophacouch.
693
00:25:56,054 --> 00:26:00,517
-And the crowd goes
wild, wild, wild!
694
00:26:00,600 --> 00:26:02,978
-"And lo, they beheld
Pandora's Box.
695
00:26:03,061 --> 00:26:05,105
Their next great error
would be to open it."
696
00:26:05,188 --> 00:26:06,314
-What?
697
00:26:06,398 --> 00:26:09,484
-Oh, nothing. Great job, guys.
698
00:26:09,567 --> 00:26:11,403
-Yeah, right this way.
I'm-a give y'all a center spot.
699
00:26:11,486 --> 00:26:13,780
Yeah. Nice digs, pharaoh.
700
00:26:13,863 --> 00:26:17,867
-What the fuck is that?
701
00:26:17,951 --> 00:26:19,119
-Hey, man!
-This is the spot
702
00:26:19,202 --> 00:26:21,079
for FurnitureCon, right?
703
00:26:21,162 --> 00:26:22,956
-FurnitureCon?
-Yeah.
704
00:26:23,039 --> 00:26:24,624
-You got a pyramid, though.
705
00:26:24,708 --> 00:26:26,167
-It's a piece of furniture,
man!
706
00:26:26,251 --> 00:26:28,378
-Alright, alright,
alright, alright. Man.
707
00:26:28,461 --> 00:26:31,131
Alright, look. Nah, man, this is
the spot for EgyptiCon.
708
00:26:31,214 --> 00:26:33,383
See, we're here.
709
00:26:33,466 --> 00:26:35,135
FurnCon is...
710
00:26:38,263 --> 00:26:39,306
...here.
711
00:26:39,389 --> 00:26:40,598
-What have you done?
712
00:26:40,682 --> 00:26:42,100
-This is my dream.
713
00:26:42,183 --> 00:26:44,436
My name is on the line!
[ Men arguing indistinctly ]
714
00:26:44,519 --> 00:26:46,146
Let's go, guys! Come on!
715
00:26:46,229 --> 00:26:47,647
There's no time!
716
00:26:47,731 --> 00:26:49,524
Son of a bitch!
717
00:26:49,607 --> 00:26:52,319
-The first bad omen.
718
00:26:52,402 --> 00:26:54,279
-Move! I need this!
719
00:26:54,362 --> 00:27:00,577
♪♪
720
00:27:00,660 --> 00:27:03,663
-Go! Let's go!
721
00:27:03,747 --> 00:27:06,416
♪♪
722
00:27:06,499 --> 00:27:08,376
Come on. Push, man!
723
00:27:08,460 --> 00:27:10,378
Push it!
724
00:27:10,462 --> 00:27:11,838
Push it!
725
00:27:11,921 --> 00:27:18,094
♪♪
726
00:27:18,178 --> 00:27:20,347
[ Creaking ]
727
00:27:20,430 --> 00:27:27,687
♪♪
728
00:27:27,771 --> 00:27:35,028
♪♪
729
00:27:35,111 --> 00:27:37,989
[ Whooshing ]
730
00:28:16,069 --> 00:28:18,238
-Oh.
731
00:28:18,321 --> 00:28:19,739
-What the fuck-shit?
732
00:28:19,823 --> 00:28:22,575
-I did not think
this was gonna happen today.
733
00:28:22,659 --> 00:28:25,245
♪♪
734
00:28:25,328 --> 00:28:26,913
-It's so beautiful.
735
00:28:26,996 --> 00:28:29,082
[ Thunder crashes ]
736
00:28:29,165 --> 00:28:32,085
-Ah.
-Ah.
737
00:28:32,168 --> 00:28:33,753
-Wait, what are we looking at?
738
00:28:33,837 --> 00:28:36,214
-It's the birth
of the universe.
739
00:28:36,297 --> 00:28:41,344
♪♪
740
00:28:41,428 --> 00:28:43,972
-Earth, watch out!
741
00:28:44,055 --> 00:28:46,224
[ Monkeys screech, lion roars ]
742
00:28:46,307 --> 00:28:47,767
-Oh, man,
it's showing us everything.
743
00:28:47,851 --> 00:28:50,270
-It ain't showing us everything.
-What you trying to see?
744
00:28:50,353 --> 00:28:52,230
-Uh, Juke-a-Thon?
745
00:28:52,313 --> 00:28:54,816
[ Cheers and applause ]
746
00:28:54,899 --> 00:28:56,818
-♪ Ayo, boy, this is fire ♪
747
00:28:56,901 --> 00:29:00,530
♪♪
748
00:29:00,613 --> 00:29:02,699
♪ ESO, this shit is live ♪
749
00:29:02,782 --> 00:29:05,160
♪ Tionne on da beat,
they gone ghost, Danny Phantom ♪
750
00:29:05,243 --> 00:29:07,495
♪ Did it like gold, you could
say this star spangled ♪
751
00:29:07,579 --> 00:29:09,873
♪ Bitches know my name
like it's the national anthem ♪
752
00:29:09,956 --> 00:29:12,709
♪ Not even bit yet and I already
got a fandom, real classy ♪
753
00:29:12,792 --> 00:29:15,128
-That's my first cousin.
-Which one?
754
00:29:15,211 --> 00:29:17,130
-The one with the finger waves.
-♪ Gonna do what I demand 'em ♪
755
00:29:17,213 --> 00:29:19,591
-♪ Demand 'em, demand 'em,
demand 'em, demand 'em ♪
756
00:29:19,674 --> 00:29:22,635
♪ Puppeteer niggas,
they gonna do what I ♪
757
00:29:22,719 --> 00:29:24,888
-I'm good. You guys good?
Can we stop it?
758
00:29:24,971 --> 00:29:26,181
-No, wait!
-After this,
759
00:29:26,264 --> 00:29:28,099
the whole world
will know my name.
760
00:29:28,183 --> 00:29:29,601
This is my dream!
761
00:29:29,684 --> 00:29:31,478
My name is on the line!
762
00:29:31,561 --> 00:29:33,813
Yo, it's trying
to tell me something.
763
00:29:33,897 --> 00:29:35,148
Mama?
764
00:29:35,231 --> 00:29:37,901
-And look at you.
765
00:29:37,984 --> 00:29:41,279
Oh, I love you so much.
766
00:29:41,362 --> 00:29:42,614
-I love you, too, Mom.
767
00:29:42,697 --> 00:29:45,533
-You are the quintessence
of love.
768
00:29:45,617 --> 00:29:48,495
And that is
what your name will be.
769
00:29:48,578 --> 00:29:49,537
Quintessence.
770
00:29:49,621 --> 00:29:50,788
-My name is Quintessence?
771
00:29:50,872 --> 00:29:54,250
-But everyone
will call you Quincy.
772
00:29:54,334 --> 00:29:56,127
Yes.
773
00:29:56,211 --> 00:29:58,713
Kareme
774
00:29:58,796 --> 00:30:01,674
and Quincy.
775
00:30:01,758 --> 00:30:05,053
-Let Geb, Nut, and Shu behold.
776
00:30:05,136 --> 00:30:09,682
-♪ Amun ♪
777
00:30:09,766 --> 00:30:11,809
[ Cheers and applause ]
778
00:30:11,893 --> 00:30:20,860
♪♪
779
00:30:20,944 --> 00:30:29,869
♪♪
780
00:30:29,953 --> 00:30:32,413
-Yes! Yes!
781
00:30:32,497 --> 00:30:35,458
Yes, yes, yes, yes, yes!
782
00:30:35,542 --> 00:30:37,752
Go, baby! It's all about you!
783
00:30:37,835 --> 00:30:42,382
[ Cheers and applause ]
784
00:30:42,465 --> 00:30:45,051
-That was so good!
785
00:30:45,134 --> 00:30:47,887
I could cry right now, but
I'm emotionally underdeveloped.
786
00:30:47,971 --> 00:30:49,722
-And if anybody else decides
787
00:30:49,806 --> 00:30:51,808
that they want to
desert the team,
788
00:30:51,891 --> 00:30:53,268
we gon' find you.
789
00:30:53,351 --> 00:30:56,980
-That part.
-[ Clears throat ]
790
00:30:57,063 --> 00:31:01,401
So, y'all showed up
and showed out.
791
00:31:01,484 --> 00:31:02,652
This is my last year.
792
00:31:02,735 --> 00:31:04,946
I'm having bunion surgery
coming up.
793
00:31:05,029 --> 00:31:08,533
You want to coach the Elites?
-Ex-squeeze me.
794
00:31:08,616 --> 00:31:10,159
She already has a team.
795
00:31:10,243 --> 00:31:11,703
So, you can take that
little offer of yours and --
796
00:31:11,786 --> 00:31:14,080
-You know what? I can do both.
I'll make time.
797
00:31:14,163 --> 00:31:15,582
-Can't nobody coach two teams.
798
00:31:15,665 --> 00:31:17,250
-I'll make time.
799
00:31:17,333 --> 00:31:19,877
I can do both.
Stand the fuck down.
800
00:31:19,961 --> 00:31:20,962
-No!
801
00:31:21,045 --> 00:31:22,755
You got to pick, okay?
802
00:31:22,839 --> 00:31:26,009
-Uh, your little angry partner
here is right.
803
00:31:26,092 --> 00:31:27,760
You can't coach
two pom-pom teams.
804
00:31:27,844 --> 00:31:29,470
-We finally agree on something.
805
00:31:29,554 --> 00:31:31,264
What you gon' do?
806
00:31:33,141 --> 00:31:34,267
-Girls, gather round.
807
00:31:34,350 --> 00:31:35,560
-Wow!
808
00:31:35,643 --> 00:31:36,936
-You -- Stop!
You didn't even let me say --
809
00:31:37,020 --> 00:31:38,855
You don't know
what I'm finna say.
810
00:31:38,938 --> 00:31:40,273
Damn. You got me all flustered.
811
00:31:40,356 --> 00:31:42,483
Shit. Breathe. Relax.
-You right. You right.
812
00:31:42,567 --> 00:31:44,152
You right. Go ahead.
-Cool out, Stacy. Jesus.
813
00:31:44,235 --> 00:31:46,821
-Mm.
-Garsh.
814
00:31:46,904 --> 00:31:49,407
Alright. So, ladies,
815
00:31:49,490 --> 00:31:52,368
sometimes in life,
things change, okay?
816
00:31:52,452 --> 00:31:56,664
-Wo-o-o-o-w!
-And I love --
817
00:31:56,748 --> 00:31:58,291
-Asleep on the job.
818
00:31:58,374 --> 00:32:00,460
This is one of Chicago's finest,
819
00:32:00,543 --> 00:32:03,463
taking self-driving
to a whole new level.
820
00:32:03,546 --> 00:32:05,214
-[ Snoring ]
-I'm gonna tell Eddie Levert
821
00:32:05,298 --> 00:32:08,635
what his son out here doing when
he supposed to be on the job.
822
00:32:08,718 --> 00:32:11,429
This why you don't --
You need to chase your dreams.
823
00:32:11,512 --> 00:32:13,139
Look at this guy.
824
00:32:13,222 --> 00:32:14,515
He in -- He think he in a Tesla.
825
00:32:14,599 --> 00:32:17,018
I ain't even know Teslas
made police cars.
826
00:32:17,101 --> 00:32:19,854
Look at him! He's legit sleep!
827
00:32:19,937 --> 00:32:22,398
Look at this man!
This where y'all tax dollars go.
828
00:32:22,482 --> 00:32:24,901
This why I don't pay taxes.
At all.
829
00:32:24,984 --> 00:32:28,488
-♪ I got that Chi-town magic,
South Side habits ♪
830
00:32:28,571 --> 00:32:31,157
♪ Kenwood class but
your boy's still savage ♪
831
00:32:31,240 --> 00:32:34,118
♪ Corner store connoisseur,
land of milk and honey buns ♪
832
00:32:34,202 --> 00:32:36,954
♪ The flamin' hots with cheese
and quart of water jugs ♪
833
00:32:37,038 --> 00:32:38,831
♪ I'm comin' home
like when 'Ye dropped out ♪
834
00:32:38,915 --> 00:32:41,334
♪ Never would have made it's
what I'm singing, graduation ♪
835
00:32:41,417 --> 00:32:44,671
♪ Spent the summer drumming out
bangers in my mama's basement ♪
836
00:32:44,754 --> 00:32:47,507
♪ I'm still alive
so I guess my mind it ♪
837
00:32:47,590 --> 00:32:50,343
♪ I got big dreams,
that's it for big things ♪
838
00:32:50,426 --> 00:32:54,263
♪ But I'm still that little
singing boy from Aberdeen ♪
839
00:32:54,347 --> 00:32:55,932
♪ I had to leave home ♪
840
00:32:55,982 --> 00:33:00,532
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