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Chapter 15.
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The Hayworth siblings
usually had Thanksgiving
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with their parents in Sacramento,
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but this year, they were hosting,
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and the pressure was on.
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Their mother had seemed down lately,
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so they were going above and beyond
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to create the perfect day.
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I love that Connor hired
a caterer, huh, guys?
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Yeah. It's going to be so easy!
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I mean, it's a little weird
that someone else is cooking,
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but I guess the real tradition
of Thanksgiving is eating.
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The real tradition of
Thanksgiving is smallpox
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and stolen land.
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Yeah. I guess I kind of walked
right into that one, huh?
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- Not all facts are fun, Tom.
- Okay.
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Ah, two bottles of mezcal?
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Oh, your sister's coming.
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Yeah. It'll be fine.
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It'll be great because
it's Thanksgiving,
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and she's my sister, and it'll be great.
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- And I'll be fine.
- Yeah. See? Denise gets it.
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Thanksgiving is about family.
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It's about traditions. It's about...
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[steel drums playing gently]
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Steel drums?
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00:00:53,270 --> 00:01:00,299
?
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What is happening?
29
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Welcome to the Caribbean!
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Pilgrim colada?
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? Hey, hey, hey, hey ?
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Connor, I don't get what happened here.
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You thought "traditional Thanksgiving"
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and went straight to... Caribbean?
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Well, this is all for Mom, right?
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She hasn't been herself lately,
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really ever since I had to cancel
that trip to Turks and Caicos
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because you guys wanted
to be all together
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as a family or whatever.
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Yeah, kind of the point of the holiday.
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So I thought to myself,
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"If I can't bring Mom to
the Turks and the Caicos,
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might as well bring the Turks
and the Caicos to her."
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Mixing it up on the skillet!
We got my man, JP.
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It is Jean Pierre.
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He's the best private
Caribbean chef in town.
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He cooks for Christian Bale.
JP, hit them with the menu.
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We have conch fritters
in a tomato vinaigrette,
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followed by a slow-roasted jerk turkey
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and a simple goat water.
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Connor, this is so, so great.
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And, Jean Pierre, thank you for
sharing your culture with us.
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Mm.
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Merci.
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We're not doing regular turkey?
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What about Mom's
creamed onion casserole?
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We wanna do all mom stuff,
you know, the classics.
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Okay, yeah, no, I'm a
little conflicted here
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because I do like moving away
from Euro-centric paradigm...
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This guy was really hard to book, okay?
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He cooks for Christian Bale!
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- Why is that a selling point?
- Yeah, how many times a week
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does Christian Bale eat Caribbean food?
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Can we just try to enjoy
this day? For Mom.
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- Totally. I'm easy. Yup.
- For Mom.
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- Cool.
- Okay.
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Hey, Jean Pierre. Hey, buddy.
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I noticed you got a couple spare
onions kicking around here.
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What about cooking those grits
in a plant-based oil, huh?
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I do things a certain way.
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- Totally.
- Yeah.
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- No, well, we respect that.
- Understood. Yeah.
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But do you have any marshmallows?
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You got to have yams
with marshmallows, right?
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[growls]
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[slurps drink]
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I am loving this Thanksgiving!
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No cooking, alcohol in a pineapple.
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Viva Turks and Caicos.
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Do you wanna go walk
barefoot in the sand?
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It's basically a free pedicure.
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Denise? Free pedi?
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Sorry. I was just mentally
preparing for Joanne.
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Oh, I thought her name was JoJo?
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The Internet calls her JoJo,
which is a child's name.
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I didn't even want her to be here.
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Usually she just goes back to Tampa,
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but our parents are on another
Jimmy Buffett Cruise,
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so they asked me to invite her.
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Come on. It's Thanksgiving.
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Maybe this is a perfect time
for you two to clear the slate.
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Wouldn't it feel great to
repair that family bond?
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Don't you have a brother you never call?
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That's different. He's awful.
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[doorbell rings]
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Oh, God.
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Easy there. You're gonna
get a brain freeze.
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That's what I'm going for.
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[screams] Denise! Sara!
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- Look at my two gorgeous gay sisters!
- Oh.
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You can just say sisters.
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Joanne, also known as JoJo,
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was Denise's carefree younger sister.
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Emphasis on the carefree.
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She called herself a travel influencer,
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whatever that meant.
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Like most siblings,
Denise loved her sister,
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but she didn't always like her.
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Oh, wow.
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That's so nice. You didn't
have to bring anything.
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Hmm? Oh!
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This is just trash from my car.
Can you do something with it?
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- Hi.
- Aloha!
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- Hey!
- Hello, Hayworth clan.
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It has been years!
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Connor, Tom, looking fine as ever.
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- Happy Thanksgiving.
- Welcome to the islands.
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And, Marina, you look so good,
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I thought Tom left you and
married a younger woman!
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Oh, stop!
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I mean, thank you so much, Joanne.
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- Auntie!
- Up here!
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Kelvin? Shamiah?
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00:04:43,370 --> 00:04:45,452
When did you two get so grown?
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00:04:45,460 --> 00:04:47,913
Hey, you wanna watch me make a TikTok?
126
00:04:47,920 --> 00:04:49,373
- Yes!
- Yeah!
127
00:04:49,380 --> 00:04:51,375
Oh, we try to limit their social media.
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00:04:51,380 --> 00:04:55,060
Oh, me too. 12 hours a day max. Yeah.
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Now, where can I get
one of those pineapples?
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Right this way.
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So, remember, it's just one day.
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And today is supposed
to be about family.
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- Yes.
- So... oh, my God.
134
00:05:04,350 --> 00:05:06,723
Stupid Connor and his stupid sand!
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00:05:07,900 --> 00:05:09,393
What was I saying?
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- Family.
- Right. Family. So important.
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00:05:12,690 --> 00:05:15,190
- So important. Yeah.
- Yeah.
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What up, Japes?
We almost done with the...
139
00:05:18,620 --> 00:05:20,460
Oh, what's that smell?
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00:05:20,480 --> 00:05:22,030
Is that creamed onion casserole?
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That is the smell of
tradition... and onions.
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- I asked him to make that.
- I thought you said you were good.
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I was good. Now I'm great
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since we're adding some of
the Hayworth stuff in the mix.
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It's just, Connor,
we agreed to catering,
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not necessarily Caribbean catering.
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Although, we love your culture
and appreciate the diversity
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you're adding to our holiday.
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Mm.
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Look, I paid for JP,
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which means I'm in charge here, okay?
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JP, can we throw in some,
maybe some pineapples in here?
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You know what? His name is
Jean Pierre. And that's gross.
154
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Creamed onion casserole is gross.
155
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So because it's your money
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we don't get a say in our
own family traditions?
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- That's gross!
- Hey, Sarah.
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- Connor!
- Stop it! This is embarrassing!
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Let go. Your being ridiculous.
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Hey, you're being... stop it. Stop.
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- You're both being ridiculous!
- I'm being ridiculous?
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- I'm... I'm trying to help!
- Oh!
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[doorbell rings]
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ALL: Mom.
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Okay. So sorry. Sorry. Sorry.
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So sorry.
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Connor's ruining Thanksgiving.
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These two are being so annoying.
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Okay, first, let me say, cultural
diversity is essential, but...
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It's all over for me.
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- Your mother got some bad news.
- Mom, what's going on?
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- I can't talk about it.
- Oh, my God.
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Oh, my God. She's got melanoma.
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00:06:33,080 --> 00:06:34,559
She sits outside in
the sun like a raisin.
175
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Of course, she's got melanoma.
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Why would your mind
immediately go there?
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- It's probably her colon.
- Guys, stop fighting!
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The important thing is, Mom is dying!
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It's none of those things. It's worse!
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00:06:43,560 --> 00:06:44,947
I didn't get menopause!
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We're going to have a baby brother?
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The musical.
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00:06:50,460 --> 00:06:52,871
I wasn't cast in "Menopause:
The Musical!"
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00:06:52,880 --> 00:06:54,100
Oh, my God, Mom.
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00:06:54,120 --> 00:06:55,374
Mom, we thought you were dying.
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It's the death of my career!
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I'm too old for "Menopause"?
Then there are no roles left.
188
00:07:00,510 --> 00:07:02,600
Who am I if I'm not treading the boards?
189
00:07:02,620 --> 00:07:04,007
I think it's trodding?
190
00:07:04,010 --> 00:07:07,720
- Mom, look, Turks and Caicos!
- I'm not in the mood.
191
00:07:07,740 --> 00:07:10,138
- Okay.
- Come here.
192
00:07:10,140 --> 00:07:11,319
Well, should we return the sand?
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- Forget about the sand.
- I wish I could.
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00:07:12,980 --> 00:07:14,476
It's 2,000 pounds of sand.
195
00:07:14,480 --> 00:07:17,600
Guys, this is serious.
She's in a really bad place.
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We need to make today great for Mom.
197
00:07:19,610 --> 00:07:21,960
Okay. Yeah. I mean,
normally Thanksgiving
198
00:07:21,980 --> 00:07:23,270
is our special day of fighting,
199
00:07:23,290 --> 00:07:25,234
but I say we just put
that aside for today.
200
00:07:25,235 --> 00:07:26,240
- Agreed.
- Mm-hmm.
201
00:07:26,250 --> 00:07:28,019
Now, if you two can stop
bickering about the food
202
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and let Jean Pierre do his job,
203
00:07:29,950 --> 00:07:31,069
we can comfort Mom.
204
00:07:31,070 --> 00:07:32,369
- Okay. Can we...
- Hey, but you're the one...
205
00:07:32,370 --> 00:07:33,870
Ah-bap-bap-bap.
206
00:07:33,880 --> 00:07:35,330
- Oh...
- Bap.
207
00:07:35,350 --> 00:07:37,470
[light music]
208
00:07:37,500 --> 00:07:38,580
Mom.
209
00:07:38,600 --> 00:07:42,000
?
210
00:07:42,020 --> 00:07:44,040
Hey, sweetie. You seen the chef?
211
00:07:44,050 --> 00:07:45,260
He left out the back.
212
00:07:45,280 --> 00:07:47,439
He said you were the worst
people he's ever cooked for,
213
00:07:47,440 --> 00:07:48,927
and he cooked for Christian Bale.
214
00:07:49,900 --> 00:07:51,590
Okay. This is fine.
215
00:07:51,600 --> 00:07:53,473
Not a big deal. We can handle this.
216
00:07:53,480 --> 00:07:54,640
We can cook dinner ourselves.
217
00:07:54,650 --> 00:07:56,189
I mean, he left us all the ingredients.
218
00:07:56,190 --> 00:07:57,200
Yeah.
219
00:07:57,220 --> 00:07:58,290
- Yeah.
- Yeah.
220
00:07:59,646 --> 00:08:01,523
We're worse than Christian Bale?
221
00:08:01,530 --> 00:08:03,483
So, basically, what
I'm doing now is a mix
222
00:08:03,490 --> 00:08:05,902
of, like, product ambassador,
content creator
223
00:08:05,910 --> 00:08:08,613
and, like, overall multi-hyphenate.
224
00:08:08,620 --> 00:08:10,000
Ah!
225
00:08:10,020 --> 00:08:12,659
So many roles. So it pays well?
226
00:08:12,660 --> 00:08:14,990
Well, it's not always money per se.
227
00:08:15,000 --> 00:08:16,900
It's usually perks like offer codes,
228
00:08:16,920 --> 00:08:19,166
party invites, free diet soup.
229
00:08:19,170 --> 00:08:20,190
Oh.
230
00:08:20,200 --> 00:08:22,169
So you're still being subsidized
by Mom and Dad?
231
00:08:22,170 --> 00:08:24,046
I'm building my brand, Denise.
232
00:08:24,050 --> 00:08:25,172
She's building her brand.
233
00:08:25,180 --> 00:08:28,060
Oh, yeah? And that's the brand of...
234
00:08:28,080 --> 00:08:29,920
I'm sorry. What skill do you possess?
235
00:08:29,940 --> 00:08:31,139
I know it's not graphic design,
236
00:08:31,140 --> 00:08:33,059
because you dropped out of
school after one semester.
237
00:08:33,060 --> 00:08:35,307
Hey, is the drummer playing Chaka Khan?
238
00:08:35,310 --> 00:08:36,919
It's the skill of building an audience.
239
00:08:36,920 --> 00:08:38,960
And Mom and Dad aren't subsidizing me,
240
00:08:38,980 --> 00:08:40,562
they're investing in me.
241
00:08:40,570 --> 00:08:42,120
Oh. Wanna know the last time
242
00:08:42,140 --> 00:08:43,500
Mom and Dad spent money on me?
243
00:08:43,520 --> 00:08:45,150
I was 11, and I wanted a soda.
244
00:08:45,160 --> 00:08:48,695
Speaking of childhood, should
we go check in on the kids?
245
00:08:48,700 --> 00:08:49,946
Yeah. I'll go.
246
00:08:52,950 --> 00:08:55,143
I know. Clear the slate.
247
00:08:55,150 --> 00:08:57,339
It just drives me crazy how
much our parents enable her.
248
00:08:57,340 --> 00:08:59,040
And it's not like they
have money to spare.
249
00:08:59,920 --> 00:09:00,950
Mm!
250
00:09:00,960 --> 00:09:04,086
- Brain freeze?
- Yes! Finally.
251
00:09:04,090 --> 00:09:06,379
Okay. Connor, you chop vegetables.
252
00:09:06,380 --> 00:09:08,757
- Sarah, gravy?
- Okay. Yeah.
253
00:09:08,760 --> 00:09:12,844
[upbeat music]
254
00:09:12,850 --> 00:09:14,221
Oh!
255
00:09:15,770 --> 00:09:17,240
Oh, yeah.
256
00:09:19,351 --> 00:09:20,727
Nice.
257
00:09:20,730 --> 00:09:22,020
Hey, hey, hey!
258
00:09:22,030 --> 00:09:24,356
- That's not...
- BOTH: Oh.
259
00:09:24,360 --> 00:09:26,660
- [oven bell dings]
- Oh!
260
00:09:26,680 --> 00:09:28,520
Moment of truth.
261
00:09:29,910 --> 00:09:31,700
- Oh!
- Smells good.
262
00:09:32,640 --> 00:09:34,820
Guys, are we pulling this off?
263
00:09:34,830 --> 00:09:37,869
These yams look, dare I say, delicioso.
264
00:09:38,640 --> 00:09:40,540
I think I'm, like, a legit chef.
265
00:09:40,560 --> 00:09:43,291
Mom's going to love this.
Mom, you're going to love this!
266
00:09:43,300 --> 00:09:45,120
Coming.
267
00:09:45,140 --> 00:09:47,380
It's hard to hustle with
one foot in the grave.
268
00:09:47,400 --> 00:09:49,500
- What is it?
- Ta-da!
269
00:09:49,520 --> 00:09:51,341
It's a work in progress, but...
270
00:09:51,350 --> 00:09:52,801
You did all this yourselves?
271
00:09:52,802 --> 00:09:53,809
Just the three of us.
272
00:09:53,810 --> 00:09:55,178
We made Thanksgiving on our own!
273
00:09:56,200 --> 00:09:58,040
First the theater doesn't need me,
274
00:09:58,760 --> 00:10:00,560
and now my own children.
275
00:10:01,650 --> 00:10:04,780
I'm useless. Useless!
276
00:10:04,790 --> 00:10:06,648
[sobbing]
277
00:10:11,820 --> 00:10:14,281
[steel drums playing]
278
00:10:14,290 --> 00:10:16,324
Muriel, come on, now.
279
00:10:18,620 --> 00:10:19,828
What... what are you doing?
280
00:10:19,830 --> 00:10:22,840
Two generations of hotties
on a beautiful beach?
281
00:10:22,860 --> 00:10:24,840
This is premium content!
282
00:10:26,090 --> 00:10:28,460
Okay. I see you, Muriel.
283
00:10:28,480 --> 00:10:31,140
Turn up. Sad girl fall.
284
00:10:31,170 --> 00:10:33,860
Hmm, this is so tragic.
285
00:10:33,880 --> 00:10:36,380
You may think you and your
sister have nothing in common,
286
00:10:36,400 --> 00:10:38,500
but you share one key thing.
287
00:10:38,520 --> 00:10:40,265
Ready to reject whatever this is.
288
00:10:40,270 --> 00:10:41,933
You both have good hearts.
289
00:10:43,720 --> 00:10:45,180
Maybe.
290
00:10:46,150 --> 00:10:47,760
She is trying to cheer Muriel up,
291
00:10:47,780 --> 00:10:49,149
which is more than what we're doing.
292
00:10:49,150 --> 00:10:50,560
Just talk to her.
293
00:10:50,580 --> 00:10:51,600
It would be nice to have
294
00:10:51,620 --> 00:10:55,030
at least one heartwarming
family moment today.
295
00:10:56,920 --> 00:11:00,202
Hey-o. What's clucking, turkeys?
296
00:11:01,100 --> 00:11:02,849
I don't think it's going
to come from Marshall.
297
00:11:02,850 --> 00:11:03,872
Yeah.
298
00:11:03,880 --> 00:11:06,291
Mind if we switch over to the game?
299
00:11:06,300 --> 00:11:08,200
Not now. The toy group
is about to go on.
300
00:11:08,220 --> 00:11:10,500
Yeah, Shamiah, honey,
Thanksgiving tradition is clear.
301
00:11:10,520 --> 00:11:14,549
We watch football.
This is not a day to watch...
302
00:11:14,550 --> 00:11:19,471
oh, the most cuddly ball
of fur I've ever seen.
303
00:11:19,480 --> 00:11:20,847
It's an Affenpinscher.
304
00:11:20,850 --> 00:11:23,240
You've got to be affin' kidding me.
305
00:11:23,260 --> 00:11:26,102
Oh, I just want to hug that little guy.
306
00:11:26,110 --> 00:11:29,033
[steel drums playing moodily]
307
00:11:29,040 --> 00:11:30,660
?
308
00:11:30,680 --> 00:11:32,984
Hey, man, maybe play something
a little more upbeat?
309
00:11:32,990 --> 00:11:36,203
[playing upbeat music]
310
00:11:36,210 --> 00:11:38,420
?
311
00:11:38,440 --> 00:11:39,866
Okay. Maybe just take a five?
312
00:11:41,980 --> 00:11:43,620
Mom, we're sorry we upset you.
313
00:11:43,640 --> 00:11:45,119
Yeah, we just wanted to make you proud.
314
00:11:45,120 --> 00:11:48,080
It's not your fault.
And I am proud of you.
315
00:11:48,100 --> 00:11:51,586
I raised three beautiful,
self-sufficient children
316
00:11:51,590 --> 00:11:55,700
who don't need me and
won't miss me when I die.
317
00:11:57,140 --> 00:11:58,480
- Mom...
- No, no, thank you.
318
00:11:58,490 --> 00:12:00,119
- I don't need it. I don't need it!
- No, let us...
319
00:12:00,120 --> 00:12:01,600
- Thank you.
- Oh, no.
320
00:12:01,620 --> 00:12:03,580
- I hate when she does this.
- Oh, my God.
321
00:12:03,590 --> 00:12:04,600
We did too good a job.
322
00:12:04,610 --> 00:12:06,142
- We made her feel unnecessary.
- Yeah.
323
00:12:06,150 --> 00:12:07,449
Almost like she would have been happier
324
00:12:07,450 --> 00:12:09,062
if we just ruined Thanksgiving.
325
00:12:09,070 --> 00:12:10,729
I think the Pilgrims
ruined it just fine.
326
00:12:10,730 --> 00:12:13,800
- The Pilgrims invented Thanksgiving.
- Not now.
327
00:12:13,820 --> 00:12:15,277
How do we make her feel better?
328
00:12:16,000 --> 00:12:17,680
Wait a second.
329
00:12:17,700 --> 00:12:19,322
What if we did ruin Thanksgiving?
330
00:12:20,540 --> 00:12:22,340
We trash one dish,
tell her we screwed up.
331
00:12:22,360 --> 00:12:24,160
She has to swoop in,
fix it, save the day.
332
00:12:24,170 --> 00:12:25,340
I love that! Okay.
333
00:12:25,360 --> 00:12:26,621
So which dish should we ruin?
334
00:12:27,920 --> 00:12:30,040
- Uh...
- No! Not my green beans.
335
00:12:30,050 --> 00:12:31,918
Come on, what about
Tom's gross casserole?
336
00:12:31,920 --> 00:12:33,299
Yeah, that's fine by me.
That thing is gross.
337
00:12:33,300 --> 00:12:35,839
It's incredibly gross,
but it's tradition.
338
00:12:35,840 --> 00:12:39,634
[light tense music]
339
00:12:39,640 --> 00:12:41,140
?
340
00:12:41,170 --> 00:12:42,480
Get out... no!
341
00:12:44,140 --> 00:12:45,870
Stop it, Thomas!
342
00:12:45,880 --> 00:12:49,760
?
343
00:12:49,780 --> 00:12:51,313
Hey, can we talk for a second?
344
00:12:51,320 --> 00:12:54,232
What, are you upset because
Mom and Dad gave me their car?
345
00:12:54,240 --> 00:12:55,692
They gave you their car?
346
00:12:57,920 --> 00:13:00,520
Mm. [breathes deeply]
347
00:13:00,540 --> 00:13:04,701
Okay. Uh, Joanne, I...
348
00:13:04,710 --> 00:13:10,900
JoJo, I feel like I've been unfair.
349
00:13:10,920 --> 00:13:14,750
I know that I'm super critical
of you and your lifestyle
350
00:13:14,770 --> 00:13:17,422
and your career and
your relationships...
351
00:13:17,430 --> 00:13:18,673
You can just say et cetera.
352
00:13:19,460 --> 00:13:23,428
Well, I just wanted to say I'm...
353
00:13:24,850 --> 00:13:27,265
sorry.
354
00:13:27,270 --> 00:13:28,391
Hmm.
355
00:13:28,400 --> 00:13:30,640
- What are you doing?
- Shh!
356
00:13:31,240 --> 00:13:33,480
I'm bringing people together.
357
00:13:35,040 --> 00:13:38,610
- I just feel like we're so different.
- [cell phone chimes]
358
00:13:38,620 --> 00:13:42,900
We just have, um,
different paths in life...
359
00:13:42,920 --> 00:13:45,240
- [cell phone chimes]
- And different...
360
00:13:45,250 --> 00:13:47,202
- values.
- [cell phone chiming]
361
00:13:47,210 --> 00:13:49,120
- Do you need to get that?
- No.
362
00:13:49,140 --> 00:13:50,288
I mean, if you don't mind.
363
00:13:53,170 --> 00:13:55,374
- Oh, my God!
- What? Did Dad have a heart attack?
364
00:13:55,375 --> 00:13:58,040
- Kelvin and Shamiah are going viral!
- Viral how?
365
00:13:58,060 --> 00:14:01,300
I made a video of them going to
town in Gretchen's candy room.
366
00:14:01,310 --> 00:14:03,580
You need to monetize these likes.
367
00:14:04,900 --> 00:14:06,805
You want me to monetize my children?
368
00:14:06,810 --> 00:14:09,682
Yeah. Deadass. Tweens
make bank on TikTok.
369
00:14:09,690 --> 00:14:12,644
I can't believe you posted my kids
online without my permission!
370
00:14:13,540 --> 00:14:15,770
We were just having fun.
What is the big deal?
371
00:14:15,780 --> 00:14:17,980
The big deal is that you
don't think about anyone else,
372
00:14:18,000 --> 00:14:19,260
and I'm sick of it.
373
00:14:19,280 --> 00:14:21,460
I can't believe I was
apologizing to you...
374
00:14:21,470 --> 00:14:22,479
deadass!
375
00:14:22,480 --> 00:14:23,947
That's not how you use that.
376
00:14:23,950 --> 00:14:25,840
Ugh, this is typical Denise.
377
00:14:25,860 --> 00:14:27,899
Always judgy. Always uptight.
378
00:14:27,900 --> 00:14:29,660
You think I want to get this uptight?
379
00:14:29,680 --> 00:14:32,000
You think I wouldn't love
to just be on a pier all day
380
00:14:32,010 --> 00:14:33,359
learning how to play the mandolin?
381
00:14:33,360 --> 00:14:34,833
I would love to play the mandolin!
382
00:14:34,840 --> 00:14:38,119
It's a lute, and I'm
getting really good.
383
00:14:38,120 --> 00:14:40,340
Well, I can't do that
because I'm a grown-up,
384
00:14:40,360 --> 00:14:41,880
and have responsibilities.
385
00:14:41,900 --> 00:14:44,755
And unlike you, I have a
little think called shame.
386
00:14:44,756 --> 00:14:47,060
Damn, Denise, if this
is really how you feel,
387
00:14:47,080 --> 00:14:48,471
why did you even invite me here?
388
00:14:48,480 --> 00:14:51,080
Because Mom and Dad made me,
and I should have said no.
389
00:14:52,800 --> 00:14:53,893
Wow.
390
00:14:53,900 --> 00:14:56,187
[punchy music]
391
00:14:56,190 --> 00:14:58,647
?
392
00:14:58,648 --> 00:15:00,358
[quietly] Go, go.
393
00:15:01,740 --> 00:15:02,920
[all groan]
394
00:15:02,940 --> 00:15:04,946
Come on! What kind of call was that?
395
00:15:04,950 --> 00:15:06,799
If that Boxer snout
is not breed standard,
396
00:15:06,800 --> 00:15:08,020
I don't know what is!
397
00:15:08,030 --> 00:15:10,952
I told you Sanchez has a
bias against working dogs.
398
00:15:10,960 --> 00:15:13,730
Yeah, well, 50 bucks
says the Brussels Griffon
399
00:15:13,750 --> 00:15:14,919
is going to take Best in Show.
400
00:15:14,920 --> 00:15:16,416
I'll take your money, old man.
401
00:15:18,710 --> 00:15:20,380
Nope. No, no, no, no, no,
402
00:15:20,400 --> 00:15:22,019
- no, no, no, no, no.
- Okay. Guys, guys, guys, guys.
403
00:15:22,020 --> 00:15:25,717
Let's just... let's just
settle this like adults.
404
00:15:25,720 --> 00:15:29,040
Yes, let's relax and calmly
destroy this meal for Mom.
405
00:15:29,060 --> 00:15:31,980
Whoa. Hey! No.
406
00:15:32,000 --> 00:15:34,029
Look, if anything, we should
destroy the casserole, right?
407
00:15:34,030 --> 00:15:35,869
- That's what made Mom cry.
- No. No, no, no, no, no, no.
408
00:15:35,870 --> 00:15:37,069
You and your stupid traditions!
409
00:15:37,070 --> 00:15:40,080
Your only tradition is
criticizing other traditions!
410
00:15:40,100 --> 00:15:42,025
Look, guys, guys, guys,
guys, guys, guys, guys.
411
00:15:42,030 --> 00:15:43,680
What?
412
00:15:43,700 --> 00:15:45,860
Is... you smell something burning?
413
00:15:45,870 --> 00:15:47,319
Oh, God!
414
00:15:47,320 --> 00:15:49,430
- Oh, no, no, no! Uh...
- Oh! All right. All right.
415
00:15:50,120 --> 00:15:51,280
- Okay, okay.
- Aah!
416
00:15:51,300 --> 00:15:52,320
Oh!
417
00:15:53,190 --> 00:15:55,490
- Oh, God! It got worse!
- It's so much worse!
418
00:15:55,500 --> 00:15:57,549
Uh, look, uh, Lupe said there's
a fire extinguisher somewhere.
419
00:15:57,550 --> 00:15:58,919
- Okay. What do we do?
- What do we do? What do we do?
420
00:15:58,920 --> 00:16:00,059
- What do we do? What do we do?
- What do we do? What do we do?
421
00:16:00,060 --> 00:16:02,740
- You're the oldest!
- Sand! Get as much as you can!
422
00:16:02,760 --> 00:16:04,130
Okay!
423
00:16:04,140 --> 00:16:05,700
Come on. Come on. Come on. Come on!
424
00:16:05,720 --> 00:16:08,051
Okay. Okay. Okay. Oh, my God.
425
00:16:08,060 --> 00:16:11,304
- Why isn't it going out? Mom!
- Coming in hot!
426
00:16:11,310 --> 00:16:15,010
?
427
00:16:15,030 --> 00:16:16,309
[smoke alarm beeping]
428
00:16:16,310 --> 00:16:18,183
Yeah!
429
00:16:18,190 --> 00:16:19,854
Whoo!
430
00:16:19,860 --> 00:16:22,520
[smoke alarm beeping]
431
00:16:28,060 --> 00:16:29,610
What have you done?
432
00:16:29,620 --> 00:16:30,907
Sorry, Mom.
433
00:16:32,950 --> 00:16:35,161
[gentle music]
434
00:16:35,170 --> 00:16:37,621
?
435
00:16:37,622 --> 00:16:39,958
Okay. Mom's in charge now.
436
00:16:39,960 --> 00:16:41,649
Come on, everyone,
we have a dinner to produce.
437
00:16:41,650 --> 00:16:42,750
Tom, you're on silverware.
438
00:16:42,770 --> 00:16:45,630
Sarah, find me whatever spices you
have in this tiny little kitchen.
439
00:16:46,480 --> 00:16:47,760
Mom's back.
440
00:16:49,350 --> 00:16:50,430
So you were right.
441
00:16:50,450 --> 00:16:52,845
The Pomeranian dominated.
442
00:16:52,850 --> 00:16:54,597
College fund.
443
00:16:54,600 --> 00:16:57,599
Okay, I got this, I got this, okay?
444
00:16:57,600 --> 00:16:59,928
- Special day of drinking?
- Special day of drinking.
445
00:16:59,930 --> 00:17:02,689
?
446
00:17:02,690 --> 00:17:04,065
What exactly is this?
447
00:17:04,070 --> 00:17:06,620
Spaghetti casserole with
a vegan corn dog crust.
448
00:17:06,640 --> 00:17:08,236
We have limited options.
449
00:17:08,240 --> 00:17:09,821
It smells great, Mom.
450
00:17:09,830 --> 00:17:12,120
Hey, I'm sorry about your kitchen.
451
00:17:12,140 --> 00:17:13,366
Lupe's going to kill me.
452
00:17:13,370 --> 00:17:14,701
Stop the chit-chat, people!
453
00:17:14,710 --> 00:17:16,035
Let's go! Move it! Move it!
Move it! Come on!
454
00:17:16,036 --> 00:17:17,760
Let's go! Go! Get the lead out!
455
00:17:17,780 --> 00:17:22,208
?
456
00:17:23,340 --> 00:17:25,830
- Hey.
- [groans] Don't worry.
457
00:17:25,850 --> 00:17:26,860
I am heading out soon.
458
00:17:26,880 --> 00:17:29,240
I'm just seeing if any Black
Friday deals have started.
459
00:17:30,480 --> 00:17:36,260
Um, look, I just wanted
to say I'm sorry.
460
00:17:36,280 --> 00:17:37,640
For real this time.
461
00:17:38,640 --> 00:17:41,860
I guess a part of me
is jealous of your life
462
00:17:41,880 --> 00:17:45,820
because you get to do whatever you want.
463
00:17:45,840 --> 00:17:46,880
Even when we were kids,
464
00:17:46,900 --> 00:17:49,277
our parents never asked anything of you.
465
00:17:50,780 --> 00:17:53,780
Because they never expected
anything from me.
466
00:17:53,800 --> 00:17:55,491
You're their golden child.
467
00:17:55,500 --> 00:17:58,980
Yes, I can get into
whatever club I want,
468
00:17:59,000 --> 00:18:01,000
I get free bikinis sent to me,
469
00:18:01,020 --> 00:18:02,790
I've literally never paid for brunch...
470
00:18:02,800 --> 00:18:03,879
I hope this is heading somewhere.
471
00:18:03,880 --> 00:18:07,462
But I have always been jealous of you.
472
00:18:08,620 --> 00:18:10,000
For what?
473
00:18:10,020 --> 00:18:13,340
Because you have
everything that matters.
474
00:18:13,360 --> 00:18:16,290
A beautiful family, a meaningful job,
475
00:18:16,300 --> 00:18:17,764
a loving wife and crap.
476
00:18:19,780 --> 00:18:22,580
But I don't have any of that.
477
00:18:22,600 --> 00:18:25,780
I'm just... broke and single.
478
00:18:25,800 --> 00:18:27,273
Hot, broke and single.
479
00:18:27,960 --> 00:18:31,840
Well, in the spirit of Thanksgiving...
480
00:18:31,860 --> 00:18:33,270
In the spirit of Thanksgiving.
481
00:18:33,280 --> 00:18:36,324
- Oh!
- Oh. Oh.
482
00:18:37,100 --> 00:18:38,760
Sorry.
483
00:18:38,780 --> 00:18:41,920
Sorry, I just wanted some,
uh... some fresh air.
484
00:18:44,360 --> 00:18:45,579
Okay.
485
00:18:45,580 --> 00:18:47,299
[whispering] We got our
heartwarming family moment.
486
00:18:47,300 --> 00:18:49,550
[whispering] We did. I'm
going to go back to it now.
487
00:18:51,380 --> 00:18:54,467
- She's fun.
- She's fun. Yeah.
488
00:18:54,470 --> 00:18:58,800
Hey, Jo, if you're free
around Christmas,
489
00:18:58,820 --> 00:19:00,800
maybe you could come back and visit us?
490
00:19:01,510 --> 00:19:04,185
I would love to stay through Christmas!
491
00:19:04,190 --> 00:19:05,300
Through?
492
00:19:05,320 --> 00:19:08,106
I... uh, not through Christmas.
I didn't say through.
493
00:19:08,620 --> 00:19:09,900
Okay. Here's the thing.
494
00:19:09,920 --> 00:19:12,480
This brand deal I had with Courtyard
by Marriott fell through,
495
00:19:12,500 --> 00:19:15,120
so I was kind of homeless-ish.
496
00:19:15,140 --> 00:19:17,570
But now I'm not!
497
00:19:17,590 --> 00:19:19,701
Now you're not!
Because you're staying...
498
00:19:19,710 --> 00:19:21,500
- Here.
- Okay.
499
00:19:21,520 --> 00:19:24,831
- Yeah.
- Well... of course!
500
00:19:24,840 --> 00:19:26,165
- Yay!
- Yeah. Yeah.
501
00:19:26,170 --> 00:19:27,750
It's going to be so much fun.
502
00:19:28,460 --> 00:19:30,120
So much fun.
503
00:19:30,130 --> 00:19:31,671
Yay!
504
00:19:33,740 --> 00:19:36,200
Tom was right. Traditions are important.
505
00:19:36,220 --> 00:19:37,940
Just not the ones he thought.
506
00:19:37,960 --> 00:19:41,150
All his mom wanted was to feel
like there was still a role for her.
507
00:19:41,160 --> 00:19:42,180
So they made that happen
508
00:19:42,200 --> 00:19:44,720
by upholding the most
important tradition of all,
509
00:19:44,730 --> 00:19:47,979
turning Thanksgiving into
their special day of fighting.
510
00:19:47,980 --> 00:19:49,149
Tom, are you going to help us clean up
511
00:19:49,150 --> 00:19:50,398
or just let the women do it?
512
00:19:50,400 --> 00:19:52,692
- Yeah, Tom.
- Same goes for you, Connor.
513
00:19:52,700 --> 00:19:54,019
I'm not done eating.
514
00:19:54,020 --> 00:19:55,659
You always say that to
get out of cleaning up.
515
00:19:55,660 --> 00:19:57,447
- I have a very healthy appetite!
- Okay.
516
00:19:57,450 --> 00:19:59,199
And you always say you have
a very healthy appetite...
517
00:19:59,200 --> 00:20:02,243
You clearly just put more on
your plate when we started...
518
00:20:02,250 --> 00:20:06,690
- My beautiful babies.
- You're not even chewing!
519
00:20:13,900 --> 00:20:16,130
Tom, you have to wash
both sides of the plate!
520
00:20:16,140 --> 00:20:18,920
- I've washed a dish before.
- Have you, though?
521
00:20:19,880 --> 00:20:22,900
Oh, man. Mom took down our video.
522
00:20:22,920 --> 00:20:24,724
Dang it! We were going to be famous.
523
00:20:24,725 --> 00:20:30,760
JoJo tagged me in a selfie,
and I got six new followers!
524
00:20:30,780 --> 00:20:32,356
I'm a viral!
525
00:20:33,120 --> 00:20:36,730
Hey, yo, Steve, can you play
some dishwashing music?
526
00:20:38,740 --> 00:20:43,819
[playing steel drums gently]
527
00:20:43,820 --> 00:20:48,580
?
528
00:20:48,600 --> 00:20:50,180
Come on, Tom, give us a shimmy.
529
00:20:50,200 --> 00:20:53,461
Give us a shimmy. Give us a shimmy!
530
00:20:54,770 --> 00:20:59,550
531
00:20:59,600 --> 00:21:04,150
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