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1
00:00:37,470 --> 00:00:40,306
♪ HERE WE ARE
2
00:00:40,340 --> 00:00:43,510
♪ SUCH GOOD FRIENDS
3
00:00:43,543 --> 00:00:47,580
♪ REUNITED ONCE AGAIN
4
00:00:49,816 --> 00:00:53,319
♪ BEEN THROUGH GOOD TIMES
5
00:00:53,353 --> 00:00:55,855
♪ THROUGH THE BAD
6
00:00:55,889 --> 00:00:59,793
♪ YOU'VE BEEN FAMILY
I'VE NEVER HAD ♪
7
00:01:02,829 --> 00:01:05,899
♪ COULD WE BE FRIENDS
AND LOVERS? ♪
8
00:01:05,932 --> 00:01:09,536
♪ YOU KNOW ME
LIKE NO OTHER ♪
9
00:01:09,569 --> 00:01:13,573
♪ WOULD WE RUIN IT ALL
WITH A KISS? ♪
10
00:01:15,608 --> 00:01:18,845
♪ WE HAVE STUCK THROUGH
11
00:01:18,878 --> 00:01:21,514
♪ THICK AND THIN
12
00:01:21,548 --> 00:01:26,686
♪ OOH, WITH EYES OF LOVE
YOU LOOK WITHIN ♪
13
00:01:28,354 --> 00:01:31,624
♪ STILL REMAIN HERE
14
00:01:31,658 --> 00:01:34,527
♪ BY MY SIDE
15
00:01:34,561 --> 00:01:38,798
♪ BUT NOW FEELINGS STIR
I CANNOT HIDE ♪
16
00:01:41,267 --> 00:01:43,937
♪ COULD WE BE FRIENDS
AND LOVERS? ♪
17
00:01:43,970 --> 00:01:46,673
♪ WHO KNOWS,
WE MIGHT DISCOVER ♪
18
00:01:46,706 --> 00:01:49,642
♪ A MUCH DEEPER LOVE
THAN THIS ♪
19
00:01:49,676 --> 00:01:53,680
♪ FIND THE THING
WE'VE ALWAYS MISSED... ♪
20
00:01:55,248 --> 00:01:56,616
MERRY CHRISTMAS, SIR.
21
00:01:56,649 --> 00:01:58,351
MERRY CHRISTMAS.
22
00:01:58,384 --> 00:02:00,520
CAN YOU SHOW ME
YOUR MOST HANDSOME
SCOTCH PINES, PLEASE?
23
00:02:00,553 --> 00:02:02,789
SURE.
RIGHT THERE NEXT TO
THE DOUGLAS FIR.
24
00:02:02,822 --> 00:02:05,558
AH, THANK YOU.
25
00:02:05,592 --> 00:02:06,793
MM!
26
00:02:06,826 --> 00:02:09,295
BEAUTIFUL, BEAUTIFUL,
BEAUTIFUL.
27
00:02:09,329 --> 00:02:12,499
[SNIFFS]
MM! MM MM MM!
28
00:02:15,435 --> 00:02:16,836
WHAT ARE
YOU DOING, IAN?
29
00:02:16,870 --> 00:02:18,638
I'VE DECIDED
WE'RE NOT GONNA HAVE
30
00:02:18,671 --> 00:02:21,207
A LONG-NEEDLE,
SHORT-NEEDLE THING
AGAIN THIS YEAR.
31
00:02:21,241 --> 00:02:23,443
IT'S GONNA
BE LONG NEEDLE.
32
00:02:23,476 --> 00:02:24,611
MM!
33
00:02:24,644 --> 00:02:25,945
WE HAVE IT
EVERY YEAR.
34
00:02:25,979 --> 00:02:27,514
WELL, IT'S AT
MY HOUSE. MY CHOICE.
35
00:02:27,547 --> 00:02:28,648
NEXT YEAR,
YOUR HOUSE,
YOUR CHOICE.
36
00:02:28,681 --> 00:02:30,250
OK. ONE VOTE
FOR LONG NEEDLE.
37
00:02:30,283 --> 00:02:32,385
OK. THE ONE VOTE
THAT COUNTS.
38
00:02:32,418 --> 00:02:34,554
THAT'S THE THING
ABOUT LIVING
IN A DEMOCRACY.
39
00:02:34,587 --> 00:02:35,822
REPUBLIC.
40
00:02:35,855 --> 00:02:37,557
YEAH, IT ALWAYS
COMES DOWN TO ONE THING
41
00:02:37,590 --> 00:02:38,992
AND ONE VOTE,
AND YOU ALWAYS LOSE.
42
00:02:39,025 --> 00:02:40,360
HEY, THIS IS
A GOOD ONE.
43
00:02:40,393 --> 00:02:42,595
THAT'S RIGHT.
NOW PUT IT BACK.
44
00:02:47,333 --> 00:02:48,902
SUPPOSED TO TRY IT
WITH THE BREADCRUMBS.
45
00:02:48,935 --> 00:02:50,436
NO, IT'S
THE CREAMY SOUP
THAT MAKES IT--
46
00:02:50,470 --> 00:02:51,704
HELLO!
47
00:02:51,738 --> 00:02:52,906
HELLO.
MERRY CHRISTMAS.
48
00:02:52,939 --> 00:02:54,274
PROMISE ME ONE THING?
49
00:02:54,307 --> 00:02:55,408
[TOGETHER]
MAYBE.
MAYBE.
50
00:02:55,441 --> 00:02:56,576
THAT WE WILL
STILL BE FRIENDS
51
00:02:56,609 --> 00:02:58,611
NO MATTER
WHAT TREE WE PICK.
52
00:02:58,645 --> 00:03:00,847
CHILDREN...
MERRY CHRISTMAS.
53
00:03:00,880 --> 00:03:02,615
OH, GOD,
LOOK AT THIS ONE.
54
00:03:02,649 --> 00:03:03,783
THIS IS GREAT.
THIS IS PERFECT.
THIS IS THE ONE.
55
00:03:03,816 --> 00:03:05,652
All: WE HATE
LONG NEEDLES!
56
00:03:05,685 --> 00:03:06,853
JUST DON'T LIKE THEM.
57
00:03:06,886 --> 00:03:08,454
STOP.
58
00:03:08,488 --> 00:03:10,957
JUST STOP.
IT'S AN UGLY TREE.
59
00:03:10,990 --> 00:03:12,892
HO HO HO!
60
00:03:12,926 --> 00:03:14,460
LOOK AT THIS.
61
00:03:14,494 --> 00:03:15,728
NICE UNI.
62
00:03:15,762 --> 00:03:17,864
I'M A HO.
63
00:03:17,897 --> 00:03:19,499
YOU'RE ROTTEN, JON.
64
00:03:19,532 --> 00:03:20,934
CHECK THIS OUT.
65
00:03:20,967 --> 00:03:23,670
I WISH
IT WAS CHRISTMAS
ALL YEAR LONG.
66
00:03:23,703 --> 00:03:25,772
TELL YOU,
THE SANTA CLAUS UNI
67
00:03:25,805 --> 00:03:28,408
IS THE ULTIMATE
MAGNET.
68
00:03:28,441 --> 00:03:29,776
FORGET ABOUT
THAT WHOLE THING
69
00:03:29,809 --> 00:03:31,744
WITH THE SHEEPS
IN WOLF CLOTHING.
70
00:03:31,778 --> 00:03:33,546
DID YOU GET
A NUMBER, JON?
71
00:03:33,580 --> 00:03:35,548
I WOULD'VE GOT HER NUMBER,
BUT THE HUSBAND CAME BACK.
72
00:03:35,582 --> 00:03:37,450
OH, THOSE PESKY
HUSBANDS.
73
00:03:37,483 --> 00:03:39,619
EXACTLY.
HEH HEH HEH!
74
00:03:40,987 --> 00:03:44,390
SANTA, SANTA!
DID YOU GET MY LETTER?
75
00:03:44,424 --> 00:03:46,326
WELL, OF COURSE
I DID, ANGEL.
76
00:03:46,359 --> 00:03:49,362
NOW...
WHERE'S YOUR MOMMY?
77
00:03:52,632 --> 00:03:54,434
Jon: YECCH.
78
00:03:54,467 --> 00:03:58,304
OK, THANK YOU
VERY MUCH, HONEY.
THAT'S GOOD.
79
00:03:58,338 --> 00:04:01,841
DIDN'T YOU GET IT?
I SENT IT
TO THE NORTH POLE.
80
00:04:01,874 --> 00:04:05,044
WELL, YOU KNOW,
SANTA'S BEEN
VERY, VERY BUSY.
81
00:04:05,078 --> 00:04:07,914
VERY GOOD.
NOW GO ON AND SCRAM
OUT OF HERE. GO ON.
82
00:04:07,947 --> 00:04:10,383
NO, NO, NO, NO!
83
00:04:13,853 --> 00:04:15,955
ALL RIGHT,
NOW LISTEN, KID.
84
00:04:15,989 --> 00:04:18,491
I AIN'T SANTA CLAUS,
AND THERE IS
NO SANTA CLAUS,
85
00:04:18,524 --> 00:04:21,394
SO YOU WANT SOMETHING,
YOU GO ASK YOUR MOM.
86
00:04:21,427 --> 00:04:22,962
NOW SCRAM.
87
00:04:25,865 --> 00:04:27,433
YOU'RE UNBELIEVABLE.
88
00:04:27,467 --> 00:04:29,936
YOU ARE
SO MEAN-SPIRITED!
89
00:04:29,969 --> 00:04:32,538
♪ WANT TO SPEND
SOME TIME ♪
90
00:04:32,572 --> 00:04:36,609
♪ IN ANOTHER UNIVERSE
91
00:04:36,643 --> 00:04:39,445
♪ LEAVING THINGS
BEHIND ♪
92
00:04:39,479 --> 00:04:42,615
♪ FAR AWAY
FROM SISTER MOON... ♪
93
00:04:42,649 --> 00:04:45,318
[ALL LAUGHING
AND CHATTERING]
94
00:04:47,553 --> 00:04:49,756
NO, NO, NO!
THAT CORNER'S
ALL WRONG.
95
00:04:49,789 --> 00:04:51,791
WE ALWAYS PUT IT
IN THERE.
96
00:04:51,824 --> 00:04:53,559
Man: YOU'RE REALLY GOOD
WITH CHILDREN, JON.
97
00:04:53,593 --> 00:04:55,028
Ian: RIGHT THERE.
RIGHT OVER THERE.
98
00:04:55,061 --> 00:04:56,929
Woman: DON'T HURT
THE TREE.
99
00:04:56,963 --> 00:04:59,098
Man: JUST STICK IT
IN THE HOLE.
YOU KNOW HOW TO DO THAT.
100
00:04:59,132 --> 00:05:00,800
HA HA.
101
00:05:00,833 --> 00:05:02,902
KNOW WHAT? I THINK
THIS IS GONNA BE
OUR BEST TREE EVER.
102
00:05:02,935 --> 00:05:04,103
WHAT DO YOU
GOT TO EAT?
103
00:05:04,137 --> 00:05:05,505
LOOK IN THE FRIDGE.
104
00:05:06,806 --> 00:05:08,474
[TELEPHONE RINGS]
105
00:05:08,508 --> 00:05:10,543
I'LL GET IT.
NO, NO! LET
THE MACHINE GET IT.
106
00:05:10,576 --> 00:05:11,911
I'LL GET IT!
107
00:05:11,944 --> 00:05:14,714
WHO ARE YOU AVOIDING?
WE'RE ALL HERE.
108
00:05:14,747 --> 00:05:16,683
I'M NOT AVOIDING ANYONE.
COULD BE THE OFFICE.
109
00:05:16,716 --> 00:05:18,151
I DON'T WANT THEM
TO GET AHOLD OF ME TILL
WE GET THE TREE TRIMMED.
110
00:05:18,184 --> 00:05:21,054
Ian on machine:
HI. IT'S IAN. I'M NOT IN.
111
00:05:21,087 --> 00:05:23,089
IF YOU DON'T LEAVE A MESSAGE,
I CAN'T CALL YOU BACK.
[MACHINE BEEPS]
112
00:05:23,122 --> 00:05:24,657
Man on machine:
IAN, THIS IS YOUR FATHER.
113
00:05:24,691 --> 00:05:27,093
I'M SORRY TO BOTHER YOU,
BUT I NEED TO KNOW
114
00:05:27,126 --> 00:05:28,928
WHETHER YOU
AND YOUR FRIENDS
ARE COMING SKIING.
115
00:05:28,961 --> 00:05:30,697
THERE'S SOMETHING
THAT I...
116
00:05:30,730 --> 00:05:32,632
THAT I HAVE TO SAY,
117
00:05:32,665 --> 00:05:34,133
AND I WOULD FEEL
MORE COMFORTABLE
118
00:05:34,167 --> 00:05:35,635
TELLING YOU IN PERSON,
IF THAT'S ALL RIGHT.
119
00:05:35,668 --> 00:05:37,603
SO, I LOOK FORWARD
TO YOUR CALL.
120
00:05:37,637 --> 00:05:39,138
[MACHINE BEEPS]
121
00:05:41,174 --> 00:05:43,743
YOU REALLY WANT TO GO?
122
00:05:43,776 --> 00:05:46,646
WHAT PART OF
FREE SKIING DIDN'T
YOU UNDERSTAND?
123
00:05:46,679 --> 00:05:48,681
WAIT A MINUTE. I THOUGHT
YOU AND YOUR FATHER
WEREN'T SPEAKING.
124
00:05:48,715 --> 00:05:50,883
WE SPEAK. A LITTLE.
125
00:05:50,917 --> 00:05:52,819
WHAT? HE JUST CALLS YOU
OUT OF THE BLUE?
126
00:05:52,852 --> 00:05:54,620
LOOK, HE CALLS
EVERY 6 MONTHS.
127
00:05:54,654 --> 00:05:56,022
IT'S NO BIG DEAL.
LET'S GET THAT TREE TRIMMED.
128
00:05:56,055 --> 00:05:57,890
I'LL START DINNER!
129
00:05:57,924 --> 00:05:59,859
SO, THEN, IAN,
IF YOU DO SEE YOUR DAD
130
00:05:59,892 --> 00:06:01,861
OR YOU DON'T SEE YOUR DAD,
IT'S NO BIGGIE?
131
00:06:01,894 --> 00:06:03,463
YEAH. THAT'S
WHAT I'M SAYING.
132
00:06:03,496 --> 00:06:04,564
GREAT. WHEN ARE
WE LEAVING?
133
00:06:04,597 --> 00:06:05,965
Man: JON.
134
00:06:05,998 --> 00:06:07,467
WELL, I MEAN,
ISN'T THIS
AN OPPORTUNITY
135
00:06:07,500 --> 00:06:08,768
FOR, YOU KNOW,
YOUR DAD AND YOU
136
00:06:08,801 --> 00:06:10,670
TO KIND OF
KISS AND MAKE UP?
137
00:06:10,703 --> 00:06:12,772
YOU GUYS ARE
TAKING THIS THING
WAY TOO SERIOUSLY.
138
00:06:12,805 --> 00:06:14,107
NO, NO, NO.
I'M WITH LISA.
139
00:06:14,140 --> 00:06:16,109
I MEAN, HE DID
CALL, RIGHT?
140
00:06:16,142 --> 00:06:18,010
SO HE MADE A CALL.
WHOOPEE.
141
00:06:18,044 --> 00:06:20,513
MY BIRTHDAY
WAS 2 MONTHS AGO.
DID HE CALL THEN?
142
00:06:20,546 --> 00:06:21,881
SEND A LETTER?
ANYTHING?
143
00:06:21,914 --> 00:06:23,149
NO.
144
00:06:23,182 --> 00:06:24,984
AND WHICH
I'M COOL WITH, RIGHT.
145
00:06:25,017 --> 00:06:26,219
I WORKED MY WAY THROUGH COLLEGE
WAITING TABLES.
146
00:06:26,252 --> 00:06:27,754
DID HE SHOW UP
FOR MY GRADUATION?
147
00:06:27,787 --> 00:06:29,122
Man: NO.
148
00:06:29,155 --> 00:06:30,923
BUT HE OFFERED YOU
THE MONEY.
149
00:06:30,957 --> 00:06:31,958
YOU WOULDN'T
TAKE IT.
150
00:06:31,991 --> 00:06:33,693
FREE SKIING!
151
00:06:33,726 --> 00:06:35,862
COME ON, IAN.
HE'S YOUR FATHER.
152
00:06:35,895 --> 00:06:38,131
HEY, GUYS,
I HAVE A GREAT LIFE.
153
00:06:38,164 --> 00:06:39,565
I STARTED
MY OWN BUSINESS.
154
00:06:39,599 --> 00:06:41,134
WE STARTED
OUR OWN BUSINESS.
155
00:06:41,167 --> 00:06:44,036
SORRY. WE STARTED
OUR OWN BUSINESS.
156
00:06:44,070 --> 00:06:45,805
BESIDES,
I HAVE YOU GUYS.
157
00:06:45,838 --> 00:06:47,607
LOOK...
158
00:06:47,640 --> 00:06:49,041
[WHISPERING]
...very much.
159
00:06:49,075 --> 00:06:50,977
I DON'T SKI.
I DON'T LIKE THE COLD.
160
00:06:51,010 --> 00:06:53,780
I DON'T LIKE
FATHERS IN GENERAL,
MINE IN PARTICULAR.
161
00:06:53,813 --> 00:06:55,615
WELL, AT LEAST
ALL OF YOU KNOW...
162
00:06:55,648 --> 00:06:57,150
All: WHO YOUR FATHER IS.
163
00:06:57,183 --> 00:07:00,086
[LAUGHING]
FUCK ALL OF YOU.
164
00:07:00,119 --> 00:07:03,556
HOWEVER, I THINK
WE SHOULD GO.
165
00:07:03,589 --> 00:07:05,825
COME ON. YOU CAN'T
SERIOUSLY BE THINKING
OF DOING THIS.
166
00:07:05,858 --> 00:07:07,193
FREE SKIING!
167
00:07:07,226 --> 00:07:08,861
JON!
168
00:07:08,895 --> 00:07:10,062
WHAT?
169
00:07:11,864 --> 00:07:14,567
IT AIN'T GONNA HAPPEN,
ALL RIGHT?
170
00:07:14,600 --> 00:07:17,203
YOU KNOW, I THINK
YOU'RE TAKING THIS
REALLY, REALLY WELL.
171
00:07:17,236 --> 00:07:20,606
YEAH. I DON'T KNOW
WHY I DIDN'T THINK
OF THIS BEFORE.
172
00:07:20,640 --> 00:07:22,141
ALL I HAVE TO DO
IS GO UP THERE,
173
00:07:22,175 --> 00:07:24,076
LET HIM TALK AT ME
A LITTLE BIT,
174
00:07:24,110 --> 00:07:26,012
TAKE MY LUMPS,
WE GET THE RUN
OF THE PLACE, RIGHT?
175
00:07:26,045 --> 00:07:28,514
WE'RE GOLDEN.
FREE SKIING MAYBE
ALL WINTER, HUH?
176
00:07:28,548 --> 00:07:30,750
NOTHING BUT THE BEST
FOR MY GOOD BUDDY.
177
00:07:30,783 --> 00:07:31,918
HEY, JONNY!
178
00:07:36,322 --> 00:07:38,724
I'LL PUT ANY AMOUNT
ON THIS ONE, FELLAS.
179
00:07:40,827 --> 00:07:42,528
Ian: AH.
180
00:07:42,562 --> 00:07:44,197
UGLY.
181
00:07:48,701 --> 00:07:51,003
I DON'T KNOW, JON.
SHE SEEMS WAY OUT
OF YOUR LEAGUE.
182
00:07:51,037 --> 00:07:52,772
YEAH, SHE ALMOST
SEEMS, YOU KNOW,
183
00:07:52,805 --> 00:07:55,842
TOO PRETTY TO IMAGINE
THE ACT, SO...
184
00:07:55,875 --> 00:07:57,643
HELL, I WOULDN'T
BE ABLE TO GET
A CHUBBY,
185
00:07:57,677 --> 00:07:59,078
LET ALONE
MAINTAIN IT.
186
00:07:59,111 --> 00:08:02,215
LIAR.
ALL BETS ARE ON.
187
00:08:02,248 --> 00:08:04,083
SO, LET ME TAKE
YOUR BAG.
188
00:08:04,116 --> 00:08:05,751
NO, NO, NO,
I'M COOL.
I GOT IT.
189
00:08:07,687 --> 00:08:10,623
UM, IAN.
YOU'RE COMING, RIGHT?
190
00:08:10,656 --> 00:08:12,024
I MEAN, YOU'RE NOT GONNA
PULL ONE OF YOUR...
191
00:08:12,058 --> 00:08:15,761
NO, I JUST NEED TO KNOW
I GOT A WAY TO GO,
192
00:08:15,795 --> 00:08:17,163
I GOTTA GO. YOU KNOW?
193
00:08:17,196 --> 00:08:18,731
RIGHT ON.
194
00:08:18,764 --> 00:08:20,166
TAKE CARE.
195
00:08:29,909 --> 00:08:32,278
YOU ARE SO...
196
00:08:34,947 --> 00:08:36,048
MMH!
197
00:08:36,082 --> 00:08:39,585
JON. [CHUCKLES]
198
00:08:39,619 --> 00:08:41,087
UH, JON.
199
00:08:41,120 --> 00:08:43,856
I'M SORRY.
CAN I GET A HUG?
200
00:08:43,890 --> 00:08:45,658
OK.
201
00:08:45,691 --> 00:08:47,226
GREAT.
202
00:08:47,260 --> 00:08:48,327
UNH!
203
00:08:48,361 --> 00:08:50,763
OW! THE HAIR!
204
00:08:50,796 --> 00:08:53,032
OK. WELL,
MIND YOUR MANNERS.
205
00:08:53,065 --> 00:08:54,734
OF COURSE.
206
00:08:54,767 --> 00:08:57,136
I'M SORRY.
207
00:09:18,024 --> 00:09:19,392
NOW, HOLD ON.
208
00:09:19,425 --> 00:09:20,826
WHAT?
209
00:09:20,860 --> 00:09:22,862
WELL, YOU DIDN'T
GET A LOVER
210
00:09:22,895 --> 00:09:24,797
WHEN I SAID
I'M COME ALONG.
211
00:09:24,830 --> 00:09:26,198
YOU GOT A MODEL.
212
00:09:26,232 --> 00:09:27,600
I SEE.
213
00:09:29,268 --> 00:09:31,604
ARE YOU REALLY
A PHOTOGRAPHER?
214
00:09:35,241 --> 00:09:37,176
ARE YOU KIDDING ME?
215
00:09:38,277 --> 00:09:39,812
OK.
216
00:09:39,845 --> 00:09:41,814
I'M ABSOLUTELY
A PHOTOGRAPHER.
217
00:09:41,847 --> 00:09:43,182
MM-HMM.
218
00:09:43,215 --> 00:09:46,319
THERE SHE IS.
RIGHT ON TIME.
219
00:09:48,988 --> 00:09:50,323
OH, MY GOD.
220
00:09:50,356 --> 00:09:52,391
HEY, BIG BROTHER!
221
00:09:52,425 --> 00:09:54,093
LITTLE SISTER!
222
00:09:55,328 --> 00:09:56,896
BIG SISTER.
223
00:09:56,929 --> 00:09:58,764
YOU LOOK VERY, UH...
224
00:09:58,798 --> 00:09:59,899
PREGNANT.
YEAH.
225
00:09:59,932 --> 00:10:01,133
OH, MAN,
DO YOU THINK?
226
00:10:01,167 --> 00:10:03,135
GOD, I THOUGHT I WAS
JUST GETTING FAT
227
00:10:03,169 --> 00:10:04,870
AND HAD A MEAN CASE
OF INDIGESTION.
228
00:10:04,904 --> 00:10:06,305
HEH HEH HEH!
229
00:10:06,339 --> 00:10:08,708
I TOLD YOU
THERE WAS SOMETHING
230
00:10:08,741 --> 00:10:09,942
I WANTED TO TALK
TO YOU ABOUT.
231
00:10:09,976 --> 00:10:11,277
NO SHIT.
232
00:10:11,310 --> 00:10:13,045
GREETINGS FROM HOME.
233
00:10:13,079 --> 00:10:14,146
I'LL BET.
234
00:10:24,256 --> 00:10:26,125
WELL, I'M NOT
REALLY A MODEL.
235
00:10:26,158 --> 00:10:28,427
I CAN'T SKI.
I DON'T KNOW
ANY OF YOUR FRIENDS.
236
00:10:28,461 --> 00:10:30,196
I MEAN, WHAT AM I
DOING HERE?
237
00:10:30,229 --> 00:10:33,132
THIS IS GONNA BE GREAT.
YOU'LL SEE.
238
00:10:33,165 --> 00:10:36,202
COME ON.
THIS IS GONNA BE GREAT.
239
00:10:41,140 --> 00:10:43,175
BABY.
240
00:10:43,209 --> 00:10:44,377
KEATON, JEEZ.
241
00:10:44,410 --> 00:10:46,879
DAD TOOK THIS
BETTER THAN YOU.
242
00:10:46,912 --> 00:10:48,414
ALL RIGHT,
EXPLAIN THAT AGAIN.
243
00:10:48,447 --> 00:10:51,217
WHAT, THAT I.U.D.s
AREN'T 100% RELIABLE?
244
00:10:53,352 --> 00:10:55,921
NO, THE PART ABOUT
NOT TELLING THE FATHER
HE'S THE FATHER.
245
00:10:55,955 --> 00:10:58,124
WELL, YOU SEEM
TO HAVE HEARD ME.
246
00:10:58,157 --> 00:10:59,458
I HEARD HER.
247
00:10:59,492 --> 00:11:02,194
WHAT YOU'RE DOING
IS TOTALLY UNFAIR.
248
00:11:02,228 --> 00:11:03,763
NO, IT'S NOT.
249
00:11:03,796 --> 00:11:06,032
SHE TOLD HIM.
250
00:11:06,065 --> 00:11:09,268
I ASKED HIM IF HE WANTED
TO HAVE A CHILD WITH ME,
251
00:11:09,301 --> 00:11:11,404
AND HE SAID NO.
252
00:11:11,437 --> 00:11:13,239
THAT'S NOT
THE SAME THING
253
00:11:13,272 --> 00:11:15,007
AS TELLING HIM
YOU'RE GONNA
HAVE HIS CHILD.
254
00:11:15,041 --> 00:11:17,910
IT'S NOT HIS CHILD.
IT'S THEIR CHILD.
255
00:11:17,943 --> 00:11:19,378
HEY, I DON'T NEED
SOME GUY TO TELL ME
256
00:11:19,412 --> 00:11:20,746
TO GO GET AN ABORTION.
257
00:11:20,780 --> 00:11:22,381
SO YOU'RE HAPPY
ABOUT THE BABY?
258
00:11:22,415 --> 00:11:24,383
ECSTATIC.
259
00:11:24,417 --> 00:11:26,085
THAT'S GREAT.
260
00:11:29,121 --> 00:11:32,324
[GERMAN ACCENT] SHIT!
261
00:11:32,358 --> 00:11:35,327
4,000 DEUTSCHE MARKS,
AND I'M STRANDED!
262
00:11:35,361 --> 00:11:39,231
[SCREAMING IN GERMAN]
263
00:11:50,843 --> 00:11:52,044
HEY, FELLA!
264
00:11:52,078 --> 00:11:53,846
JA?
265
00:11:53,879 --> 00:11:56,115
WHICH WAY IS
TIMBER RIDGE ROAD?
266
00:11:56,148 --> 00:11:58,184
IT'S THAT WAY--OH!
267
00:11:58,217 --> 00:12:00,519
BITTE, MEIN
AUTO IS
TOTALED, IS DEAD,
268
00:12:00,553 --> 00:12:02,221
AND I'M STRANDED,
269
00:12:02,254 --> 00:12:03,823
SO PLEASE GIVE ME
A RIDE INTO TOWN.
270
00:12:03,856 --> 00:12:07,460
I'LL SHOW YOU
THE WAY. PLEASE?
271
00:12:09,028 --> 00:12:10,296
YEAH, SURE.
COME ON, GET IN.
272
00:12:10,329 --> 00:12:12,064
DANKE.
273
00:12:14,567 --> 00:12:17,036
[SHOUTING IN GERMAN]
274
00:12:21,373 --> 00:12:23,476
OH, HOW SERENDIPITOUS.
275
00:12:23,509 --> 00:12:25,845
I NEED RIDE,
AND YOU NEED DIRECTIONS.
276
00:12:25,878 --> 00:12:28,347
MY NAME IS HANS.
277
00:12:28,380 --> 00:12:30,883
HELLO, HANS.
I'M JON.
THIS IS CARLA.
278
00:12:30,916 --> 00:12:33,152
HELLO, JON.
HELLLOOO, CARLA.
279
00:12:35,855 --> 00:12:37,990
OH, TIMBER RIDGE ROAD
IS JUST UP HERE
A LITTLE WAYS,
280
00:12:38,023 --> 00:12:39,225
A LITTLE BIT
281
00:12:39,258 --> 00:12:42,361
AROUND THE BEND
AND SO FORTH.
282
00:12:44,864 --> 00:12:47,833
[SPEAKING GERMAN]
283
00:12:47,867 --> 00:12:49,301
I'M FROM BAVARIA.
284
00:12:49,335 --> 00:12:50,903
WHERE FROM
IN DEUTSCHLAND
DO YOU HAIL, SWEET?
285
00:12:50,936 --> 00:12:51,937
FROM STUTTGART.
286
00:12:51,971 --> 00:12:53,472
STUTTGART. SO MARVELOUS!
287
00:12:53,506 --> 00:12:55,608
WHICH WAY
AM I GOING, PLEASE?
288
00:12:55,641 --> 00:12:57,910
YOU JUST RIGHT, LEFT.
I'LL SHOW YOU HOW TO
GET THERE, SWEETIE.
289
00:12:57,943 --> 00:13:00,279
THANKS FOR THE RIDE.
I WAS SO STRANDED.
290
00:13:02,882 --> 00:13:06,252
SO, MY CAR IS SO MUCH
TROUBLES LATELY, A LITTLE--
291
00:13:06,285 --> 00:13:08,888
WHY DON'T YOU SIT
BACK A LITTLE THERE,
HANS, AND RELAX.
292
00:13:08,921 --> 00:13:10,389
OK, PAL? THANKS.
293
00:13:10,422 --> 00:13:12,091
BE NICE. HOW MUCH FUN
CAN YOU HAVE
294
00:13:12,124 --> 00:13:14,160
WHEN YOUR CAR
BREAKS DOWN?
295
00:13:14,193 --> 00:13:16,462
DON'T WORRY.
I'M SURE IT'S ONLY MINOR.
296
00:13:16,495 --> 00:13:19,298
OH, MY GOD. SHE HAS GOT
THE MOST BEAUTIFUL HANDS.
297
00:13:19,331 --> 00:13:22,635
WHICH IS INTERESTING
BECAUSE MY NAME IS
ALSO STRANGELY HANS.
298
00:13:22,668 --> 00:13:24,136
I LEARNED
FROM MY GRANDMOTHER
299
00:13:24,170 --> 00:13:26,172
BACK IN SCHWARZWALD--
IN BADEN-BADEN.
300
00:13:26,205 --> 00:13:27,873
HOW TO READ PALMS
A LONG TIME AGO.
301
00:13:27,907 --> 00:13:29,475
IT'S JUST A LITTLE SKILL
THAT I STILL POSSESS.
302
00:13:29,508 --> 00:13:31,010
REALLY?
YES.
303
00:13:31,043 --> 00:13:32,178
CAN YOU READ MINE?
304
00:13:32,211 --> 00:13:33,946
YES, I'D BE HAPPY TO.
305
00:13:33,979 --> 00:13:35,514
DO YOU WANT
TO KNOW THE PRESENT
OR THE FUTURE?
306
00:13:35,548 --> 00:13:37,316
THE FUTURE.
307
00:13:37,349 --> 00:13:40,052
VERY WELL. THIS HERE
IS YOUR LIFELINE.
308
00:13:40,085 --> 00:13:42,421
LOOK DOWN HERE.
SEE HOW THIS ARCS
AROUND LIKE THIS?
309
00:13:42,454 --> 00:13:44,256
THIS IS YOUR LIFELINE.
YOU HAVE GOOD, LONG,
310
00:13:44,290 --> 00:13:46,292
LONG, LONG LIFE.
311
00:13:46,325 --> 00:13:48,460
STRONG STOCK.
312
00:13:48,494 --> 00:13:50,229
BUT I SEE HERE
ON THE LOVELINE
THERE'S A BREAK,
313
00:13:50,262 --> 00:13:52,064
WHICH MEANS MANY THINGS.
314
00:13:52,097 --> 00:13:54,266
WHAT YOU THINK
MIGHT HAPPEN IS
NOT GOING TO HAPPEN,
315
00:13:54,300 --> 00:13:57,570
AND PERHAPS
SOMETHING ELSE
WILL HAPPEN.
316
00:14:01,540 --> 00:14:03,075
YOU KNOW,
I THOUGHT FOR SURE
317
00:14:03,108 --> 00:14:04,376
YOU'D HAVE, LIKE,
A BONEHEAD BAVARIAN
318
00:14:04,410 --> 00:14:05,644
IN YOUR
IMMEDIATE FUTURE.
319
00:14:09,014 --> 00:14:11,217
JON, BEHAVE. COME ON.
320
00:14:11,250 --> 00:14:13,552
I ALSO SEE HERE FINALLY--
321
00:14:13,586 --> 00:14:16,522
OH!
FUNF KINDER!
5 LITTLE CHILDREN.
322
00:14:16,555 --> 00:14:18,357
NOT WITH YOU, HANS.
NOW SIT BACK AND RELAX.
323
00:14:18,390 --> 00:14:20,559
JON! WHAT?
324
00:14:20,593 --> 00:14:22,928
HE'S FROM EUROPE.
325
00:14:22,962 --> 00:14:25,231
I MEAN, YOU CAN'T
EXPECT HIM TO ACT
LIKE A NORMAL AMERICAN.
326
00:14:25,264 --> 00:14:28,167
YOU'RE NOT REALLY
GOING FOR THIS
BULLSHIT ARE YOU?
327
00:14:28,200 --> 00:14:29,935
WHAT?
328
00:14:29,969 --> 00:14:32,638
YOU KNOW WHAT?
FORGET IT.
329
00:14:32,671 --> 00:14:34,306
JUST LET'S FORGET IT.
I'M GONNA PULL OVER.
330
00:14:34,340 --> 00:14:35,975
I'D LIKE YOU TO GET OUT.
OK THERE, HANS?
331
00:14:36,008 --> 00:14:37,509
I DO SOMETHING WRONG?
332
00:14:37,543 --> 00:14:39,378
I WANT YOU OUT OF
MY FUCKING CAR,
OK, BAVARIAN?
333
00:14:39,411 --> 00:14:40,713
HAVE YOU GONE NUTS?
334
00:14:40,746 --> 00:14:42,514
THIS IS
UNBELIEVABLE.
335
00:14:42,548 --> 00:14:44,483
YOU WANT THIS GUY
COMING ON TO YOU?
IS THAT IT?
336
00:14:44,516 --> 00:14:47,653
HE'S NOT COMING
ON TO ME. ARE YOU?
337
00:14:47,686 --> 00:14:49,488
JON, I WASN'T
COMING ON TO HER
IN THE SLIGHTEST, JON.
338
00:14:49,521 --> 00:14:51,023
SIT BACK, BUDDY!
339
00:14:51,056 --> 00:14:52,291
YOU'RE CRAZY.
340
00:14:52,324 --> 00:14:55,327
I'M CRAZY?
YOU'RE CRAZY.
341
00:14:55,361 --> 00:14:57,162
WHAT, DO YOU
THINK THIS WACKO IS
CUTE OR SOMETHING?
342
00:14:58,464 --> 00:14:59,665
YEAH, HE'S CUTE.
343
00:14:59,698 --> 00:15:01,100
OOH!
344
00:15:01,133 --> 00:15:02,167
CUTE, MY ASS!
345
00:15:04,670 --> 00:15:06,505
Hans: JON, DID I DO
SOMETHING WRONG TO JON?
346
00:15:06,538 --> 00:15:08,040
GET OUT.
347
00:15:08,073 --> 00:15:10,009
RIGHT, THANKS.
348
00:15:19,318 --> 00:15:21,320
KISS
MEIN ARSCHLOCH!
349
00:15:22,588 --> 00:15:25,557
HA HA!
SHE LIKES ME BETTER.
350
00:15:25,591 --> 00:15:27,459
HE CAN'T HANDLE IT.
351
00:15:27,493 --> 00:15:29,028
HANS READ HER HANDS.
352
00:15:29,061 --> 00:15:30,496
NOW SHE WANTS ME
IN HER PANTS.
353
00:15:30,529 --> 00:15:32,264
♪ SWIM THE DEEPEST OCEAN
354
00:15:32,298 --> 00:15:36,101
♪ JUST TO SEE YOU SMILE
355
00:15:36,135 --> 00:15:40,239
♪ SCALE THE HIGHEST MOUNTAIN,
TOUCH THE SKY ♪
356
00:15:42,107 --> 00:15:44,576
♪ FOR YOU I CROSS A DESERT
357
00:15:44,610 --> 00:15:48,047
♪ WALK FOR MILES AND MILES
358
00:15:48,080 --> 00:15:53,585
♪ JUST TO WIPE A TEAR
FROM YOUR EYE ♪
359
00:15:53,619 --> 00:15:59,458
♪ BABY, I'D DO
ANYTHING FOR YOU... ♪
360
00:16:03,529 --> 00:16:05,698
YOU KNOW, KEAT? HMM?
361
00:16:05,731 --> 00:16:08,434
I'VE BEEN THINKING.
MAYBE, YOU COULD FIX
ME UP WITH IAN.
362
00:16:08,467 --> 00:16:09,768
OH, SCORE.
363
00:16:09,802 --> 00:16:11,737
THAT'S NOT FUNNY.
364
00:16:11,770 --> 00:16:13,539
I'M NOT JOKING.
I'VE SEEN THE WAY
HE LOOKS AT ME.
365
00:16:13,572 --> 00:16:14,740
HE LOOKS AT EVERYONE
THAT WAY.
366
00:16:14,773 --> 00:16:16,175
DOES NOT.
HE DOES TOO.
367
00:16:16,208 --> 00:16:17,443
DOES NOT.
HELLO!
368
00:16:17,476 --> 00:16:19,111
LOOK!
THAT'S IAN'S FATHER.
369
00:16:23,782 --> 00:16:25,384
HOW YOU DOING,
MR. WICKHAM?
370
00:16:25,417 --> 00:16:27,119
HI.
KEATON.
371
00:16:27,152 --> 00:16:29,221
OH, YES. KEATON.
IAN'S TOLD ME
ABOUT YOU.
372
00:16:29,254 --> 00:16:30,656
NOW, RICHARD, OK?
CALL ME RICHARD.
373
00:16:30,689 --> 00:16:31,824
NO IAN?
374
00:16:31,857 --> 00:16:33,125
HE'S DRIVING HIMSELF.
375
00:16:33,158 --> 00:16:34,259
ALL RIGHT.
376
00:16:34,293 --> 00:16:35,461
THIS IS LISA,
377
00:16:35,494 --> 00:16:37,162
AND THIS IS
MY SISTER JANE.
378
00:16:37,196 --> 00:16:38,364
SHE'S PREGNANT.
379
00:16:38,397 --> 00:16:39,531
GREAT.
380
00:16:39,565 --> 00:16:41,300
I HAVE HEARD
SO MUCH ABOUT YOU.
381
00:16:41,333 --> 00:16:42,534
OH, THANK YOU.
I'M SO GLAD
YOU COULD COME.
382
00:16:42,568 --> 00:16:44,770
MY--OH, YOU--
YOU ARE PREGNANT!
383
00:16:44,803 --> 00:16:47,106
LET'S GET YOU INSIDE
AND COMFORTABLE,
ALL RIGHT?
384
00:16:47,139 --> 00:16:48,273
THERE'S A BEAUTIFUL
FIREPLACE.
385
00:16:48,307 --> 00:16:49,475
OH, YUMMY.
386
00:16:51,243 --> 00:16:53,345
HE DOESN'T SEEM
SO HORRIBLE TO ME.
387
00:16:53,379 --> 00:16:55,647
EVERYBODY'S
PARENTS ARE GREAT
EXCEPT YOUR OWN.
388
00:16:55,681 --> 00:16:57,583
Richard: FOR YOU.
389
00:16:57,616 --> 00:16:59,318
HI, GUYS!
390
00:16:59,351 --> 00:17:01,186
All: HEY!
391
00:17:01,220 --> 00:17:02,721
HI, THERE. I'M JON.
392
00:17:02,755 --> 00:17:05,858
WELCOME.
I'M RICHARD, AND
MERRY CHRISTMAS.
393
00:17:05,891 --> 00:17:07,626
THANK YOU, RICHARD.
MERRY CHRISTMAS
TO YOU, TOO.
394
00:17:07,659 --> 00:17:08,694
AND YOU ARE?
395
00:17:08,727 --> 00:17:10,129
CARLA.
NICE TO MEET YOU.
396
00:17:10,162 --> 00:17:12,765
THIS IS
MY NEW FRIEND CARLA.
397
00:17:12,798 --> 00:17:14,166
HI, CARLA.
398
00:17:14,199 --> 00:17:15,768
CAN I INTEREST YOU
IN A GLASS OF WINE.
399
00:17:15,801 --> 00:17:19,304
REAL CORK
OR A PLASTIC CAP?
400
00:17:19,338 --> 00:17:22,274
IT'S MOUTON
ROTHSCHILD '75.
401
00:17:22,307 --> 00:17:25,477
1975? WOW.
WHERE'D YOU GET THAT?
402
00:17:25,511 --> 00:17:26,845
OH, DIDN'T
IAN TELL YOU?
403
00:17:26,879 --> 00:17:28,680
WELL,
I'M IN THE BUSINESS.
404
00:17:28,714 --> 00:17:31,150
ALL RIGHT, A TOAST.
THIS'LL BE ON ME.
405
00:17:31,183 --> 00:17:33,552
TO FRIENDS
AND FAMILY.
406
00:17:33,585 --> 00:17:36,255
All: HEAR, HEAR.
407
00:17:36,288 --> 00:17:38,690
OR ANYTHING
RESEMBLING.
408
00:17:41,760 --> 00:17:43,495
KEATON!
409
00:17:43,529 --> 00:17:45,130
WHAT?
BE CAREFUL.
410
00:17:45,164 --> 00:17:47,166
THAT'S VERY SENSITIVE
EQUIPMENT. PLEASE!
411
00:17:47,199 --> 00:17:49,435
JON, I DON'T EVEN KNOW
WHY YOU'RE BRINGING
ALL THIS CRAP, ANYWAY.
412
00:17:49,468 --> 00:17:51,270
WE DIDN'T EVEN TAKE
A GROUP PHOTO LAST YEAR.
413
00:17:51,303 --> 00:17:52,504
WELL, WE'RE GOING TO
TAKE ONE THIS YEAR.
414
00:17:52,538 --> 00:17:54,473
AND SOMETHING ELSE.
415
00:17:54,506 --> 00:17:56,475
YOU'RE GONNA WANT
TO GET IN ON THIS
THING ABOUT CARLA.
416
00:17:56,508 --> 00:17:58,811
I'M TELLING YOU,
I HAVE A SIXTH SENSE
ABOUT THESE MATTERS.
417
00:17:58,844 --> 00:18:01,380
SHE'S AT LEAST
AN INCH AND A HALF,
MAYBE 2.
418
00:18:01,413 --> 00:18:04,817
I PROMISE YOU,
THE WOMAN NEEDS
A NIPPLE-ECTOMY.
419
00:18:06,518 --> 00:18:07,753
GOD!
420
00:18:07,786 --> 00:18:09,288
WHAT?
421
00:18:09,321 --> 00:18:11,690
I'VE GOT AN AEROBICS
INSTRUCTOR INSIDE THERE.
422
00:18:11,723 --> 00:18:12,791
OOH.
423
00:18:12,825 --> 00:18:14,193
YEAH.
424
00:18:14,226 --> 00:18:15,527
YOU'RE SO BRAVE.
425
00:18:15,561 --> 00:18:17,529
REALLY?
426
00:18:17,563 --> 00:18:20,165
YEAH. I MEAN, HAVING
A CHILD, I WOULD NOT
KNOW WHERE TO START.
427
00:18:20,199 --> 00:18:21,800
OH, STARTING,
THAT'S THE EASY PART.
428
00:18:21,834 --> 00:18:23,769
YOU JUST GOTTA LIE THERE
FOR ABOUT 60 SECONDS,
429
00:18:23,802 --> 00:18:25,737
AND THEN YOU'RE
WELL ON YOUR WAY.
430
00:18:25,771 --> 00:18:27,372
I SEE.
431
00:18:29,374 --> 00:18:32,544
COULD I ASK YOU
SOMETHING
EMBARRASSING?
432
00:18:32,578 --> 00:18:34,246
THE ANSWER IS YES.
433
00:18:34,279 --> 00:18:35,814
HEMORRHOIDS
AND FLATULENCE
434
00:18:35,848 --> 00:18:37,816
WILL BECOME YOUR FRIENDS
DURING PREGNANCY.
435
00:18:37,850 --> 00:18:39,551
OK, WELL...
436
00:18:42,354 --> 00:18:45,424
WELL, I DON'T
UNDERSTAND.
I MEAN, WHY--
437
00:18:45,457 --> 00:18:47,860
WHY AM I SUCH
A MAGNET FOR LOSERS?
438
00:18:47,893 --> 00:18:50,662
WELL, THERE'S NO SHORTAGE
OF LOSERS IN THE WORLD.
439
00:18:52,464 --> 00:18:54,500
OHH.
440
00:18:54,533 --> 00:18:57,236
DO YOU THINK
JON IS A LOSER?
441
00:18:57,269 --> 00:19:00,239
NO, I'M AFRAID
I'M NOT MUCH OF A COOK.
442
00:19:00,272 --> 00:19:02,374
MY WIFE TOOK CARE
OF MOST OF THAT.
443
00:19:02,407 --> 00:19:04,276
OH, I'M SORRY TO HEAR
ABOUT HER PASSING.
444
00:19:04,309 --> 00:19:07,813
OH. THIS HOUSE
WAS HER PRIDE AND JOY.
445
00:19:07,846 --> 00:19:11,216
AND IAN, OH, HE ALWAYS
LOVED THIS PLACE.
446
00:19:11,250 --> 00:19:14,219
RIGHT, RIGHT.
447
00:19:14,253 --> 00:19:16,555
HELLO.
448
00:19:16,588 --> 00:19:17,956
BABY, COME HERE.
449
00:19:17,990 --> 00:19:19,258
WHAT?
450
00:19:19,291 --> 00:19:21,560
[JANE WHISPERING]
451
00:19:21,593 --> 00:19:23,562
[LISA AND JANE LAUGH]
452
00:19:23,595 --> 00:19:26,331
UM, JON?
453
00:19:26,365 --> 00:19:27,599
MM-HMM. MM-HMM.
454
00:19:27,633 --> 00:19:30,502
WHAT DID HE HIT YOU WITH,
THE MODELING LINE?
455
00:19:30,536 --> 00:19:32,671
[ALL GIGGLE]
456
00:19:32,704 --> 00:19:33,939
OHH!
457
00:19:33,972 --> 00:19:35,340
OH, BABY.
458
00:19:35,374 --> 00:19:36,808
I GUESS
I FELL FOR IT. OK.
459
00:19:39,278 --> 00:19:40,746
I MEAN, HOW DO YOU
TELL THE DIFFERENCE
460
00:19:40,779 --> 00:19:42,481
BETWEEN THE GOOD
AND THE BAD ONES?
461
00:19:42,514 --> 00:19:45,584
OK, WELL,
I JUST MAKE A LIST--
462
00:19:45,617 --> 00:19:48,987
YOU KNOW, 2 COLUMNS,
PROS AND CONS.
463
00:19:49,021 --> 00:19:50,722
REALLY?
MM-HMM.
464
00:19:50,756 --> 00:19:52,491
I JUST FEEL THEIR HEADS,
AND IF THEY'RE NOT POINTED,
465
00:19:52,524 --> 00:19:55,861
I FIGURED I'M ON
THE RIGHT TRACK. CHEESE?
466
00:19:55,894 --> 00:19:57,729
YEAH, PASS ME
A LOG, BABY.
467
00:19:57,763 --> 00:19:59,464
LITTLE LOGGY.
468
00:19:59,498 --> 00:20:00,933
MM!
469
00:20:00,966 --> 00:20:02,935
I'VE GOT IT.
I'VE GOT IT.
470
00:20:02,968 --> 00:20:04,403
YOU LOOSEN
THIS FIRST--
471
00:20:04,436 --> 00:20:07,005
JON, I GOT IT.
I'M LOOSENING IT.
472
00:20:07,039 --> 00:20:08,707
Lisa: RIGHT THERE.
473
00:20:08,740 --> 00:20:12,277
LOOSEN THERE--STOP IT.
PLEASE GET OFF!
474
00:20:12,311 --> 00:20:14,446
OH, YOU GOT
A HUGE POINT HERE.
475
00:20:14,479 --> 00:20:16,048
GET OFF. STOP.
476
00:20:16,081 --> 00:20:17,749
I HAVE A POINT
BECAUSE WHEN I WAS A KID
477
00:20:17,783 --> 00:20:19,284
I FELL DOWN
AND BUMPED MY HEAD.
478
00:20:19,318 --> 00:20:20,485
REALLY, YOU DID?
479
00:20:20,519 --> 00:20:22,321
STOP IT.
THAT'S CROOKED.
480
00:20:22,354 --> 00:20:24,590
IT'S NOT YOUR DICK, KEATON.
IT CAN'T BE CROOKED.
481
00:20:24,623 --> 00:20:26,024
STOP!
482
00:20:26,058 --> 00:20:28,627
STOP! STOP!
483
00:20:31,663 --> 00:20:33,932
[LAUGHING]
484
00:20:33,966 --> 00:20:35,567
STOP IT! STOP!
485
00:20:35,601 --> 00:20:37,736
PLEASE STOP,
STOP, STOP! STOP.
486
00:20:41,006 --> 00:20:43,875
[DOORBELL RINGS]
487
00:20:43,909 --> 00:20:45,844
AND THAT WILL BE...
488
00:20:45,877 --> 00:20:47,980
Richard: AHH.
489
00:20:49,414 --> 00:20:51,917
IAN!
490
00:20:51,950 --> 00:20:54,653
UH, MERRY CHRISTMAS.
I'M DAVID.
491
00:20:54,686 --> 00:20:56,922
MERRY CHRISTMAS.
WELCOME.
492
00:20:56,955 --> 00:20:59,558
IS IAN WITH YOU?
493
00:20:59,591 --> 00:21:00,959
HE'S NOT HERE?
494
00:21:02,461 --> 00:21:03,862
COME ON IN.
I'M RICHARD.
495
00:21:03,895 --> 00:21:05,864
HI.
496
00:21:09,468 --> 00:21:11,770
Keaton:
SASSY DAVE IS HERE.
497
00:21:11,803 --> 00:21:13,905
Lisa: OH, DUCKY!
498
00:21:15,407 --> 00:21:16,775
Jon: UH,
THIS IS CARLA.
499
00:21:16,808 --> 00:21:18,844
HI. DAVID.
NICE TO MEET YOU.
500
00:21:18,877 --> 00:21:19,845
Jane: HEY, BABY.
501
00:21:19,878 --> 00:21:22,414
HEY! OH, MY GOD!
502
00:21:22,447 --> 00:21:24,082
BABY IS RIGHT.
503
00:21:24,116 --> 00:21:25,417
DID YOU BRING THE FATHER?
504
00:21:25,450 --> 00:21:26,785
OH, NO.
TURKEY BASTER.
505
00:21:26,818 --> 00:21:28,420
KEATON, WHY DIDN'T
YOU TELL ME?
506
00:21:28,453 --> 00:21:29,554
I DON'T WANT TO TALK
ABOUT IT, DAVID.
507
00:21:29,588 --> 00:21:31,023
Jane: OH, JESUS.
508
00:21:32,391 --> 00:21:33,959
SO, UH, WHERE'S IAN?
509
00:21:33,992 --> 00:21:35,961
Jon: HE'S
A SLOW DRIVER.
510
00:21:35,994 --> 00:21:37,763
YEAH! IF I KNOW IAN,
511
00:21:37,796 --> 00:21:39,364
HE HASN'T EVEN LEFT YET.
512
00:21:39,398 --> 00:21:42,401
I'LL CALL HIM.
513
00:21:42,434 --> 00:21:45,437
[VIDEO GAME BEEPING]
514
00:21:45,470 --> 00:21:49,841
[TELEPHONE RINGS]
515
00:21:49,875 --> 00:21:51,510
IAN HERE.
516
00:21:51,543 --> 00:21:54,646
OH, HI--AHEM. HI, DAD.
HOW YOU DOING?
517
00:21:54,680 --> 00:21:56,782
[WHISPERING]
What do we do
if Ian doesn't show?
518
00:21:58,617 --> 00:22:00,519
PRETEND LIKE
NOTHING HAPPENED,
519
00:22:00,552 --> 00:22:02,921
AT LEAST UNTIL WE
GET IN ONE DAY OF SKIING.
520
00:22:02,954 --> 00:22:03,922
Women: JON!
521
00:22:03,955 --> 00:22:05,390
TRY NOT TO SPEAK.
522
00:22:06,491 --> 00:22:07,793
[HANGS UP]
523
00:22:09,494 --> 00:22:10,996
WELL, HE SAID
524
00:22:11,029 --> 00:22:12,998
HE MUST'VE LOST
TRACK OF TIME,
525
00:22:13,031 --> 00:22:15,133
AND HE'S GOING TO
JUMP IN THE CAR
526
00:22:15,167 --> 00:22:16,868
AND DRIVE RIGHT OVER.
527
00:22:16,902 --> 00:22:18,704
Jane: GREAT.
GOOD.
528
00:22:18,737 --> 00:22:19,871
PERFECT.
529
00:22:26,578 --> 00:22:30,449
LOOK, I REALLY DON'T
THINK HE'S GONNA
COME AT THIS POINT.
530
00:22:30,482 --> 00:22:32,050
WE'RE SORRY,
MR. WICKHAM.
531
00:22:32,084 --> 00:22:34,619
IT'S ALL RIGHT,
BUT I JUST WANT
YOU TO KNOW
532
00:22:34,653 --> 00:22:37,189
THAT, UH, IF YOU
WANT TO STAY,
533
00:22:37,222 --> 00:22:38,890
YOU'RE MORE
THAN WELCOME.
534
00:22:38,924 --> 00:22:40,792
ALL RIGHT? REALLY,
ENJOY YOURSELVES.
535
00:22:40,826 --> 00:22:43,095
HE'S COMING, RICHARD.
I MEAN, YOU HEARD HIM.
536
00:22:43,128 --> 00:22:47,065
WELL, THANK YOU,
BUT I DON'T THINK SO.
537
00:22:49,134 --> 00:22:50,602
GOD.
538
00:22:50,635 --> 00:22:52,070
Jon: I DON'T KNOW
ABOUT YOU GUYS,
539
00:22:52,104 --> 00:22:54,773
BUT TOMORROW,
I AM SKIING ALL DAY.
540
00:22:54,806 --> 00:22:57,776
I DON'T KNOW.
I THINK WE SHOULD
GO HOME.
541
00:22:57,809 --> 00:22:59,745
NO! COME ON.
542
00:22:59,778 --> 00:23:02,047
I KNOW. LET'S TAKE
THE PICTURE.
543
00:23:02,080 --> 00:23:04,449
EVERYBODY ON THE COUCH.
COME ON, LET'S GO.
544
00:23:09,821 --> 00:23:12,224
HI. I THOUGHT WE'D
HAVE SOMETHING SWEET
545
00:23:12,257 --> 00:23:14,659
AND THEN JUST
TURN IN SO WE CAN
GET UP EARLY.
546
00:23:14,693 --> 00:23:16,461
SOUNDS GOOD.
GOOD.
547
00:23:16,495 --> 00:23:17,929
CAN YOU READ THAT?
I DON'T HAVE
MY GLASSES.
548
00:23:17,963 --> 00:23:20,699
HOW MUCH TIME
DOES THAT TAKE?
549
00:23:20,732 --> 00:23:22,667
IT SAYS ABOUT...
550
00:23:22,701 --> 00:23:24,069
30 MINUTES.
551
00:23:24,102 --> 00:23:25,904
PERFECT. ALL RIGHT.
552
00:23:25,937 --> 00:23:27,072
YOU READY FOR US?
553
00:23:27,105 --> 00:23:28,807
FOR WHAT?
554
00:23:28,840 --> 00:23:30,542
WELL, EVERY YEAR,
WE DO A CHRISTMAS
PHOTO OF THE GROUP,
555
00:23:30,575 --> 00:23:32,177
AND WE'D LOVE FOR YOU
TO JOIN US.
556
00:23:32,210 --> 00:23:34,846
HEH! ALL RIGHT.
557
00:23:34,880 --> 00:23:37,182
ALL RIGHT. OK.
558
00:23:37,215 --> 00:23:38,817
30 MINUTES.
559
00:23:47,826 --> 00:23:48,927
CARLA, IF YOU CAN
JUST SIT UP
560
00:23:48,960 --> 00:23:50,862
A LITTLE BIT
FOR ME, PLEASE.
561
00:23:50,896 --> 00:23:52,097
UNCROSS YOUR LEGS.
562
00:23:52,130 --> 00:23:54,032
CHIN DOWN,
3/4 PROFILE.
563
00:23:54,065 --> 00:23:56,935
RIGHT. OK,
NOW JUST SIT UP MORE
AND ARCH YOUR BACK.
564
00:23:56,968 --> 00:23:58,570
A LITTLE BIT MORE.
HARDER.
565
00:23:58,603 --> 00:23:59,838
JON!
JON!
566
00:23:59,871 --> 00:24:03,575
SORRY. JUST GONNA
SET THE TIMER.
567
00:24:03,608 --> 00:24:05,710
AND...HERE WE GO.
568
00:24:05,744 --> 00:24:07,579
AND I'M COMING IN HERE.
569
00:24:07,612 --> 00:24:11,082
LET ME JUST--I NEED TO JUST
SQUEEZE IN RIGHT HERE.
570
00:24:11,116 --> 00:24:12,884
HOLD STILL. PUT YOUR ARM
AROUND MY NECK.
571
00:24:12,918 --> 00:24:13,919
ALL RIGHT, WAIT!
YOU'LL BLOW THE PICTURE.
572
00:24:13,952 --> 00:24:15,120
HOLD STILL, AND...
573
00:24:15,153 --> 00:24:18,857
EVERYBODY SAY,
"WE LOVE YOU!"
574
00:24:18,890 --> 00:24:20,992
WE LOVE YOU!
575
00:24:21,026 --> 00:24:22,093
[EXPLOSION]
576
00:24:22,127 --> 00:24:24,229
[ALL SCREAMING]
577
00:24:25,897 --> 00:24:28,166
DON'T PUSH ME!
DON'T PUSH!
578
00:24:29,768 --> 00:24:32,571
OH, MY GOD!
579
00:24:32,604 --> 00:24:35,006
THAT WAS SO WEIRD.
I DON'T KNOW!
580
00:24:35,040 --> 00:24:36,975
WAIT, WAIT.
581
00:24:37,008 --> 00:24:38,944
I MIGHT KNOW.
582
00:24:40,178 --> 00:24:41,613
GO CHECK!
583
00:24:41,646 --> 00:24:42,914
HE SHOULDN'T
GO IN LIKE THAT.
584
00:24:42,948 --> 00:24:44,082
HE SHOULDN'T GO
IN THERE ALONE.
585
00:24:44,115 --> 00:24:45,283
I THOUGHT IT WAS YOU.
586
00:24:45,317 --> 00:24:46,852
IT SOUNDED
LIKE A BOMB.
587
00:24:46,885 --> 00:24:47,986
I HOPE IT WASN'T ME.
I'M NOT READY.
588
00:24:49,721 --> 00:24:51,089
ARE YOU SURE
YOU WANT TO DO THIS?
589
00:24:51,122 --> 00:24:52,591
IT COULD BE GAS.
590
00:24:52,624 --> 00:24:54,125
NO, I DON'T THINK
IT'S GAS.
591
00:24:54,159 --> 00:24:57,095
NO, I HAVE THIS
SINKING FEELING.
592
00:24:57,128 --> 00:24:59,598
NO, THE FUSE BOX
IS HERE SOMEWHERE.
593
00:24:59,631 --> 00:25:01,199
AI-YI-YI-YI-YI.
594
00:25:01,233 --> 00:25:02,634
HERE'S THE FUSE BOX.
595
00:25:02,667 --> 00:25:04,836
OH, THANK YOU.
596
00:25:07,239 --> 00:25:08,707
THERE WE ARE.
597
00:25:08,740 --> 00:25:10,108
HUH.
598
00:25:10,141 --> 00:25:11,309
I DON'T THINK
WE'RE GONNA BE HAVING
599
00:25:11,343 --> 00:25:12,711
ANY CHRISTMAS PUDDING.
600
00:25:12,744 --> 00:25:14,145
ALL RIGHT, LOOK,
UM...
601
00:25:14,179 --> 00:25:17,082
I WILL CLEAN THIS UP
TOMORROW MORNING, ALL RIGHT?
602
00:25:17,115 --> 00:25:19,284
WELL, OBVIOUSLY--
603
00:25:19,317 --> 00:25:21,820
WHAT THE HELL WAS IT?
604
00:25:21,853 --> 00:25:23,221
THE MICROWAVE BLEW.
605
00:25:23,255 --> 00:25:24,656
NO.
606
00:25:24,689 --> 00:25:25,957
YOU KIDDING?
607
00:25:25,991 --> 00:25:27,325
I'M FREEZING.
WHAT'S IN THERE?
608
00:25:27,359 --> 00:25:28,660
OH, MY GOD,
THE CHRISTMAS
PUDDING!
609
00:25:28,693 --> 00:25:29,928
THAT CAN--
610
00:25:29,961 --> 00:25:31,329
GO, GO!
IT'S FREEZING!
611
00:25:31,363 --> 00:25:32,864
HE PUT THE WHOLE CAN
IN THERE?
612
00:25:32,898 --> 00:25:34,699
I HOPE HE DOESN'T
HAVE ANY PETS.
613
00:25:36,234 --> 00:25:37,736
OH, MY GOD!
614
00:25:37,769 --> 00:25:40,305
[LAUGHS]
WHOA!
615
00:25:40,338 --> 00:25:42,674
THIS COULD HAVE
TAKEN SOMEONE'S
EYE OUT.
616
00:25:42,707 --> 00:25:44,376
Jon:
YOU KNOW WHAT, THOUGH?
617
00:25:44,409 --> 00:25:46,845
IT'S NOT BAD.
618
00:25:46,878 --> 00:25:48,813
OK, LET'S
CLEAN THIS UP.
619
00:25:48,847 --> 00:25:50,715
RICHARD SAID
HE'D CLEAN IT UP
IN THE MORNING.
620
00:25:50,749 --> 00:25:53,218
Lisa: WE CAN'T
LEAVE IT LIKE THIS.
621
00:25:53,251 --> 00:25:55,020
THAT'S WHAT THE MAN WANTS.
WE'RE HIS GUESTS.
622
00:25:55,053 --> 00:25:56,855
IF YOU DON'T WANT
TO DO WHAT HE WANTS,
623
00:25:56,888 --> 00:25:58,256
KNOCK YOURSELVES OUT.
624
00:25:58,290 --> 00:25:59,958
OH, MEN ARE
RIDICULOUS.
625
00:25:59,991 --> 00:26:01,293
TOTALLY.
626
00:26:01,326 --> 00:26:03,828
OK, BOYS WITH THE BOYS
IN THE FIRST ROOM.
627
00:26:03,862 --> 00:26:05,730
GIRLS WITH THE GIRLS
IN THE SECOND.
628
00:26:05,764 --> 00:26:07,666
THAT'S WHAT THE MAN WANTS,
THAT'S WHAT THE MAN GETS.
629
00:26:07,699 --> 00:26:09,067
THIS REALLY SUCKS.
630
00:26:09,100 --> 00:26:10,168
IT'LL BE
JUST LIKE CAMP.
631
00:26:10,201 --> 00:26:11,903
DAVID...
632
00:26:11,937 --> 00:26:14,172
YOU'RE NOT GETTING ANY,
AND THAT'S FINAL.
633
00:26:14,205 --> 00:26:16,041
JON.
634
00:26:16,074 --> 00:26:17,275
YES?
635
00:26:26,151 --> 00:26:28,086
[CHUCKLES]
636
00:26:28,119 --> 00:26:30,188
Richard: NO,
HE TOLD HIS FRIENDS
637
00:26:30,221 --> 00:26:32,390
THAT HE WAS
GOING TO DRIVE UP
WHEN THEY DROVE UP.
638
00:26:32,424 --> 00:26:35,026
I DON'T KNOW
WHY YOU'RE MAKING SUCH
A BIG DEAL OUT OF THIS.
639
00:26:35,060 --> 00:26:36,828
BECAUSE, SWEETHEART,
640
00:26:36,861 --> 00:26:38,129
IF YOU'RE WILLING
TO WALK AWAY
641
00:26:38,163 --> 00:26:39,931
FROM YOUR OWN CHILD
WITHOUT PUTTING UP A FIGHT
642
00:26:39,965 --> 00:26:41,866
OR AT LEAST TRYING
TO FIX THINGS,
643
00:26:41,900 --> 00:26:43,868
HONEY, WHAT DOES THAT SAY
ABOUT OUR CHANCES
644
00:26:43,902 --> 00:26:45,236
COME SOME CLOUDY DAY?
645
00:26:45,270 --> 00:26:47,138
WHY DON'T YOU
JUST COME UP ANYWAY?
646
00:26:47,172 --> 00:26:48,273
REALLY.
647
00:26:48,306 --> 00:26:49,874
[LAUGHING]
648
00:26:49,908 --> 00:26:52,978
SO WHAT'S THE GROUP
YOU'VE GOT GOING?
649
00:26:53,011 --> 00:26:54,412
WHAT, THE BOYS AND ME?
650
00:26:54,446 --> 00:26:58,016
CHEZ GEORGE,
IF YOU CAN BELIEVE IT.
651
00:26:58,049 --> 00:26:59,884
HMM. ON MAIN?
652
00:26:59,918 --> 00:27:01,219
MM-HMM.
653
00:27:01,252 --> 00:27:02,387
10 YEARS AGO,
WE ALL WORKED THERE.
654
00:27:02,420 --> 00:27:03,788
IT WAS
OUR FIRST JOBS.
655
00:27:03,822 --> 00:27:05,056
REALLY?
656
00:27:05,090 --> 00:27:07,292
AFTER THAT,
WE JUST SORT OF STUCK.
657
00:27:07,325 --> 00:27:08,793
Jane: OH, SHIT.
658
00:27:08,827 --> 00:27:10,261
ARE YOU OK DOING THIS?
659
00:27:10,295 --> 00:27:13,798
I'M PREGNANT,
NOT PARALYZED.
660
00:27:13,832 --> 00:27:15,166
[PASSES WIND]
661
00:27:15,200 --> 00:27:16,301
JESUS!
662
00:27:16,334 --> 00:27:18,203
[LAUGHS]
663
00:27:19,337 --> 00:27:21,239
I--I'M SORRY.
664
00:27:21,272 --> 00:27:23,875
[JANE LAUGHING]
665
00:27:25,110 --> 00:27:27,812
MMM.
666
00:27:29,981 --> 00:27:31,383
Jon: I MEAN,
WHAT IS THE BIG DEAL
667
00:27:31,416 --> 00:27:33,351
IF I STAY
IN THE SAME BED
WITH CARLA?
668
00:27:33,385 --> 00:27:35,320
YOU THINK RICHARD'S
REALLY GONNA GET
THAT FREAKED OUT?
669
00:27:35,353 --> 00:27:36,888
TAKE HER TO A MOTEL.
670
00:27:36,921 --> 00:27:38,123
I CAN'T TAKE HER
TO A MOTEL.
671
00:27:38,156 --> 00:27:39,791
IT'LL RUIN
THE WHOLE...
672
00:27:39,824 --> 00:27:40,859
MOOD?
673
00:27:40,892 --> 00:27:42,460
EXACTLY.
674
00:27:42,494 --> 00:27:43,795
WELL, THEN,
YOU'RE STUCK HERE
WITH US, JON.
675
00:27:43,828 --> 00:27:45,263
Jon: FINE.
676
00:27:45,296 --> 00:27:48,299
I JUST DON'T WANT ANYONE
CALLING ME A LIAR.
677
00:27:48,333 --> 00:27:52,137
OH, NO, HERE WE GO
ON THIS PECULIAR
NOTION OF YOURS
678
00:27:52,170 --> 00:27:53,872
ABOUT THE SIZE
OF A WOMAN'S--
679
00:27:53,905 --> 00:27:56,141
LUSCIOUS LIPS.
680
00:27:56,174 --> 00:27:58,410
AND BASED ON
THE CORRESPONDENCE
TO THE--
681
00:27:58,443 --> 00:28:00,045
Jon: LENGTH
OF THE NIPPLE.
682
00:28:00,078 --> 00:28:03,148
GENTLEMEN,
MY ADVANCED
RESEARCH PROVES
683
00:28:03,181 --> 00:28:04,949
BEYOND THE SHADOW
OF A DOUBT
684
00:28:04,983 --> 00:28:07,185
THAT THE LIPS
ARE A DEFINITIVE
INDICATOR OF THE--
685
00:28:07,218 --> 00:28:08,787
Both: ERECTIVE NIPPLES.
686
00:28:08,820 --> 00:28:11,156
WE KNOW.
Jon: EXACTLY.
687
00:28:11,189 --> 00:28:13,792
FELLAS, TAKE A GOOD LOOK
AT THOSE LIPS.
688
00:28:18,963 --> 00:28:20,365
YOU'RE SICK.
689
00:28:20,398 --> 00:28:22,233
I MEAN, WE'RE TALKING
ABOUT AT LEAST AN INCH,
690
00:28:22,267 --> 00:28:24,536
PROBABLY AN INCH AND A HALF.
I'M WILLING TO BET 2 INCHES.
691
00:28:24,569 --> 00:28:25,970
NOW...
692
00:28:26,004 --> 00:28:28,206
WHO WOULD LIKE
TO PUT THEIR MONEY
693
00:28:28,239 --> 00:28:31,476
WHERE THEIR MOUTHS
WISH THEY WERE?
694
00:28:31,509 --> 00:28:33,211
WELL, MAYBE
JUST YOU, KEATON.
695
00:28:33,244 --> 00:28:34,446
OK, HA HA.
696
00:28:34,479 --> 00:28:35,947
WELL, TELL ME THIS, JON.
697
00:28:35,980 --> 00:28:37,315
WHAT EXACTLY IS
THE SCIENTIFIC FORMULA
698
00:28:37,348 --> 00:28:38,483
FOR EXTRAPOLATING
THE LENGTH
699
00:28:38,516 --> 00:28:40,852
OF AN ERECT NIPPLE
FROM THE, UH--
700
00:28:40,885 --> 00:28:42,153
SURFACE AREA
701
00:28:42,187 --> 00:28:43,521
AND GIRTH
OF THE LIPS.
702
00:28:43,555 --> 00:28:45,223
DAVID,
IT'S SO SIMPLE.
703
00:28:45,256 --> 00:28:47,525
"L" EQUALS
"EN" SQUARED.
704
00:28:47,559 --> 00:28:50,328
LIPS EQUALS
ERECT NIPPLES SQUARED.
705
00:28:50,361 --> 00:28:52,897
[BOTH LAUGHING]
706
00:28:54,232 --> 00:28:55,266
David:
THANKS, PROFESSOR.
707
00:28:55,300 --> 00:28:57,402
FINE, GO AHEAD.
708
00:28:57,435 --> 00:28:58,570
LAUGH, LAUGH.
709
00:28:58,603 --> 00:29:00,872
WOULD YOU LIKE ME
TO GET...
710
00:29:00,905 --> 00:29:02,307
PHOTOGRAPHIC PROOF?
711
00:29:04,209 --> 00:29:06,010
I MEAN, DO YOU
ACTUALLY THINK
THAT I WOULD, LIKE,
712
00:29:06,044 --> 00:29:08,346
RETOUCH THESE
LUSCIOUS GIFTS
FROM GOD?
713
00:29:08,379 --> 00:29:10,415
YES, I DO.
714
00:29:13,384 --> 00:29:15,019
OK.
715
00:29:15,053 --> 00:29:17,522
[SNAPS FINGERS]
I GOT IT.
716
00:29:17,555 --> 00:29:20,291
THE JACUZZI.
717
00:29:20,325 --> 00:29:22,160
SO I MAKE A LIST
OF EVERYTHING
718
00:29:22,193 --> 00:29:23,962
I THINK I WANT
FROM A GUY,
719
00:29:23,995 --> 00:29:25,930
YOU KNOW,
IN A RELATIONSHIP,
720
00:29:25,964 --> 00:29:28,166
AND THEN I JUST
MAKE A LIST OF ALL
THE GUYS I KNOW,
721
00:29:28,199 --> 00:29:32,203
AND THEN I'LL SEE
IF ANYTHING MATCHES.
722
00:29:32,237 --> 00:29:34,839
AND THEN WHAT?
723
00:29:34,873 --> 00:29:36,574
THEN I TAKE 'EM HOME
AND FUCK 'EM.
724
00:29:36,608 --> 00:29:38,376
[LAUGHS]
725
00:29:40,345 --> 00:29:41,980
NICE.
726
00:29:42,013 --> 00:29:43,148
YEAH, AND THAT WORKS.
IT ACTUALLY WORKS, RIGHT?
727
00:29:43,181 --> 00:29:44,449
YOU FIND SOMEBODY
VERY GOOD THAT WAY.
728
00:29:44,482 --> 00:29:47,185
WELL, HEY, I FOUND
AN IMPREGNATOR.
729
00:29:47,218 --> 00:29:49,487
YEAH, BUT NOT A HUSBAND.
730
00:29:49,521 --> 00:29:50,588
NO.
731
00:29:50,622 --> 00:29:52,223
OH.
732
00:29:56,361 --> 00:29:58,630
WELL, I KNOW WHAT I WANT.
733
00:29:58,663 --> 00:30:00,965
I JUST NEED TO KNOW
WHAT THEY'RE REALLY LIKE.
734
00:30:00,999 --> 00:30:02,233
Lisa: WHAT, THE BOYS?
735
00:30:02,267 --> 00:30:04,469
WELL, THEY'RE
PRETTY TRUE TO FORM.
736
00:30:04,502 --> 00:30:06,504
I MEAN, WHAT YOU SEE
IS WHAT YOU GET.
737
00:30:06,538 --> 00:30:09,174
NO, I MEAN IN BED.
738
00:30:09,207 --> 00:30:10,608
OH.
739
00:30:10,642 --> 00:30:14,546
WELL, NOW THIS IS
GETTING INTERESTING.
740
00:30:14,579 --> 00:30:17,015
WHAT? WHAT--
741
00:30:17,048 --> 00:30:18,183
DON'T LOOK AT ME.
742
00:30:18,216 --> 00:30:19,551
I'VE NEVER SLEPT
WITH THEM.
743
00:30:19,584 --> 00:30:21,419
Jane: PLEASE,
DO WE BUY THIS?
744
00:30:21,452 --> 00:30:24,088
COME ON.
I MEAN, YOU KNOW A BUNCH
OF GUYS FOR 10 YEARS,
745
00:30:24,122 --> 00:30:25,890
AND YOU DON'T
DO IT WITH THEM?
746
00:30:25,924 --> 00:30:28,092
NO, I DIDN'T.
747
00:30:28,126 --> 00:30:29,427
OH, PLEASE,
THAT DOESN'T SOUND
VERY NATURAL,
748
00:30:29,460 --> 00:30:30,662
DOES IT?
749
00:30:30,695 --> 00:30:31,996
NO.
NO.
750
00:30:33,631 --> 00:30:35,433
YOU'RE NOT A LESBO,
ARE YOU?
751
00:30:35,466 --> 00:30:38,970
NO! JESUS!
752
00:30:39,003 --> 00:30:40,438
THERE'S NOTHING
WRONG WITH IT.
753
00:30:40,471 --> 00:30:42,273
NO!
754
00:30:42,307 --> 00:30:44,976
WELL, THE ONLY THING
I KNOW IS THAT
MY BROTHER, KEATON,
755
00:30:45,009 --> 00:30:46,344
HE'S SUPPOSED TO, UM...
756
00:30:46,377 --> 00:30:48,513
HAVE A LONG PENIS.
757
00:30:48,546 --> 00:30:53,117
I MEAN, A REALLY,
REALLY LONG PENIS.
758
00:30:53,151 --> 00:30:55,320
REALLY?
759
00:30:56,654 --> 00:30:59,891
OK, NOW WAIT.
760
00:31:01,125 --> 00:31:02,527
NOW, REMEMBER,
761
00:31:02,560 --> 00:31:04,629
A WOLF
IN SHEEP'S CLOTHING.
762
00:31:04,662 --> 00:31:06,231
AROOO.
763
00:31:06,264 --> 00:31:07,599
SO IS THE BELLYBUTTON
LIKE ONE OF THOSE
764
00:31:07,632 --> 00:31:09,133
LITTLE TURKEY
POPPER THINGS?
765
00:31:09,167 --> 00:31:11,135
LIKE, WHEN IT'S DONE,
IT "POOP"!
766
00:31:11,169 --> 00:31:12,270
HA HA HA.
767
00:31:12,303 --> 00:31:14,205
IT'S ALMOST DONE!
768
00:31:14,239 --> 00:31:16,207
HEY.
769
00:31:16,241 --> 00:31:19,244
LISTEN, YOU GUYS
DON'T WANT TO TAKE
A JACUZZI, DO YOU?
770
00:31:19,277 --> 00:31:21,346
Carla: SURE.
YEAH.
771
00:31:21,379 --> 00:31:23,481
WELL, IT'S NOT GONNA BE
READY FOR A HALF-HOUR.
772
00:31:23,514 --> 00:31:25,350
I MEAN, YOU GUYS STILL
HAVE TO CLEAN UP, RIGHT?
773
00:31:25,383 --> 00:31:27,418
WE'RE DONE NOW.
774
00:31:27,452 --> 00:31:28,620
YEAH.
775
00:31:28,653 --> 00:31:30,688
WE JUST HAVE
TO GET CHANGED.
776
00:31:30,722 --> 00:31:33,358
OK, I'LL, UH...
TELL 'EM YOU'RE COMING.
777
00:31:35,026 --> 00:31:36,060
HE'S SO CUTE.
778
00:31:36,094 --> 00:31:38,196
I THINK
HE'S A VIRGIN.
779
00:31:38,229 --> 00:31:39,530
NO.
ARE YOU KIDDING?
780
00:31:39,564 --> 00:31:41,132
NO.
781
00:31:41,165 --> 00:31:43,067
WELL, LET'S GET HIM
TO LOSE THE ANTLERS,
782
00:31:43,101 --> 00:31:44,335
AND MAYBE WE CAN
FIND HIM SOMEONE.
783
00:31:44,369 --> 00:31:45,637
[LAUGHS]
784
00:31:45,670 --> 00:31:48,039
OK, I WILL GO
TO THE JACUZZI,
785
00:31:48,072 --> 00:31:49,540
REMOVE THE THERMOMETER.
786
00:31:49,574 --> 00:31:51,042
I WILL LOOK AT IT.
THEN I WILL SAY,
787
00:31:51,075 --> 00:31:53,711
"OK, THE JACUZZI IS READY."
788
00:31:53,745 --> 00:31:57,115
THEN YOU WILL SAY,
"OK, EVERYBODY STRIP."
789
00:31:57,148 --> 00:31:58,449
AND YOU THINK
THAT'S GONNA WORK?
790
00:31:58,483 --> 00:32:00,018
I KNOW IT'S GOING TO WORK!
791
00:32:00,051 --> 00:32:02,086
JUST BE SURE THAT CARLA IS
IN THE PRECISE POSITION.
792
00:32:02,120 --> 00:32:03,187
THEY'RE COMING!
793
00:32:03,221 --> 00:32:05,523
WHAT?!
UHH!
794
00:32:05,556 --> 00:32:06,724
OH, SHIT!
795
00:32:06,758 --> 00:32:08,993
[LAUGHS]
ARE YOU ALL RIGHT?
796
00:32:13,164 --> 00:32:14,532
IT'S ONLY 65 DEGREES.
797
00:32:14,565 --> 00:32:15,767
THEY DON'T HAVE TO GET
IN THE JACUZZI.
798
00:32:15,800 --> 00:32:17,368
THEY JUST HAVE
TO GET NAKED.
799
00:32:17,402 --> 00:32:20,071
HI, GUYS.
HEY.
800
00:32:20,104 --> 00:32:21,339
HOW'S THE WATER?
801
00:32:21,372 --> 00:32:23,007
WATER'S GOOD.
WATER'S GOOD.
802
00:32:23,041 --> 00:32:24,208
REALLY?
SURE.
803
00:32:24,242 --> 00:32:26,477
ARE YOU WEARING
A BATHING SUIT, JON?
804
00:32:26,511 --> 00:32:29,681
YOU DON'T HAVE
TO WEAR A BATHING SUIT
IN THE JACUZZI.
805
00:32:29,714 --> 00:32:32,250
WHY NOT?
806
00:32:32,283 --> 00:32:34,218
WELL, BECAUSE YOU'RE
SUPPOSED TO GO...
807
00:32:34,252 --> 00:32:35,586
AU NATUREL.
808
00:32:35,620 --> 00:32:37,622
Jane: YEAH, WELL,
YOU CAN COUNT ME OUT.
809
00:32:37,655 --> 00:32:40,224
I CAN'T GO IN.
I'LL JUST DIP MY TOES.
810
00:32:40,258 --> 00:32:42,226
Carla: SO...
811
00:32:42,260 --> 00:32:43,361
EVERYBODY'S
GETTING NAKED?
812
00:32:43,394 --> 00:32:45,063
YUP.
813
00:32:46,164 --> 00:32:47,332
YUP.
814
00:32:48,433 --> 00:32:49,500
YUP.
815
00:32:49,534 --> 00:32:51,703
OK.
816
00:32:51,736 --> 00:32:54,272
COME HERE.
COME HERE.
817
00:32:56,841 --> 00:32:59,277
[WHISPERING]
I didn't agree
to this.
818
00:33:02,447 --> 00:33:04,182
OK, BUT, UH...
819
00:33:04,215 --> 00:33:05,350
YOU GUYS GO FIRST.
820
00:33:05,383 --> 00:33:06,551
NO OFFENSE.
YEAH.
821
00:33:08,820 --> 00:33:10,621
STRIP.
822
00:33:10,655 --> 00:33:13,691
OK. NO PROBLEM.
823
00:33:13,725 --> 00:33:14,792
STRIP.
824
00:33:14,826 --> 00:33:17,695
STRIP.
825
00:33:19,697 --> 00:33:20,798
GET READY.
826
00:33:25,336 --> 00:33:28,473
OH, MY GOD!
HOLY SHIT!
827
00:33:28,506 --> 00:33:30,274
Lisa: IT'S FUCKING
GARGANTUAN!
828
00:33:30,308 --> 00:33:31,743
I TOLD YOU.
[LISA SCREAMS]
829
00:33:31,776 --> 00:33:34,045
IT'S HUGE! AAH!
830
00:33:35,413 --> 00:33:37,081
Jon: DAMN IT!
831
00:33:37,115 --> 00:33:39,083
[DOOR CLOSES]
KEATON!
832
00:33:39,117 --> 00:33:40,551
WHAT?
833
00:33:40,585 --> 00:33:42,186
YOU SCARED 'EM AWAY!
834
00:33:43,454 --> 00:33:45,123
IT WAS YOUR IDEA, JON.
835
00:33:45,156 --> 00:33:47,492
[ALL LAUGHING]
836
00:33:58,803 --> 00:34:02,240
Lisa: I WAS
NEVER SO FRIGHTENED
IN MY ENTIRE LIFE.
837
00:34:02,273 --> 00:34:04,709
THAT WOULD GIVE ANY WOMEN
SECOND THOUGHTS, HUH?
838
00:34:04,742 --> 00:34:06,310
JESUS!
839
00:34:06,344 --> 00:34:08,379
WHAT WOULD YOU
EVEN DO WITH THAT?
840
00:34:08,413 --> 00:34:11,416
DON'T ASK ME.
I'M HIS SISTER.
841
00:34:11,449 --> 00:34:13,151
OH, ARE YOU OK?
842
00:34:13,184 --> 00:34:14,786
NO, IT'S JUST
THE BABY KICKED.
843
00:34:14,819 --> 00:34:16,154
CAN I FEEL?
844
00:34:16,187 --> 00:34:17,789
YEAH, SURE.
HERE. COME HERE.
845
00:34:20,291 --> 00:34:22,360
Jane:
AH, YOU FEEL THAT?
846
00:34:22,393 --> 00:34:23,795
Carla: NO.
HERE.
847
00:34:23,828 --> 00:34:25,263
WAIT.
848
00:34:27,265 --> 00:34:29,267
GOD, I CAN'T
HEAR IT, EITHER.
849
00:34:29,300 --> 00:34:30,768
HER.
IT'S A SHE.
850
00:34:30,802 --> 00:34:32,703
OH, YOU HAD AN AMNIO?
851
00:34:32,737 --> 00:34:34,238
NO.
852
00:34:34,272 --> 00:34:35,673
THERE'S NO WIENIE
ON THE ULTRASOUND.
853
00:34:35,706 --> 00:34:37,508
OH, ALL RIGHT!
854
00:34:37,542 --> 00:34:39,343
Carla: YEAH,
AND WITH THOSE PENISES
IN YOUR FAMILY,
855
00:34:39,377 --> 00:34:40,845
YOU'D DEFINITELY SEE IT.
856
00:34:40,878 --> 00:34:43,514
YOU'D PROBABLY
JUST GIVE BIRTH
TO ONE LARGE PENIS.
857
00:34:43,548 --> 00:34:45,683
THERE WOULDN'T BE
MUCH ROOM IN THERE
FOR ANYTHING ELSE.
858
00:34:45,716 --> 00:34:47,852
Lisa: DEFINITELY.
IT WOULD BE THE WHOLE BABY.
859
00:34:47,885 --> 00:34:49,754
JUST A PENIS.
860
00:34:49,787 --> 00:34:51,889
OH, YEAH!
[LAUGHS]
861
00:34:51,923 --> 00:34:54,459
DO NOT FEAR,
GENTLEMEN.
862
00:34:54,492 --> 00:34:55,693
VICTORY IS NOT LOST.
863
00:34:55,726 --> 00:34:57,228
OH, WILL YOU QUIT?
864
00:34:57,261 --> 00:34:59,430
WHAT WE NEED IS
A REALLY GOOD PLAN "B."
865
00:34:59,464 --> 00:35:00,698
FUCK PLAN "B."
866
00:35:00,731 --> 00:35:04,669
OK, ODD MAN GETS THE COT.
867
00:35:04,702 --> 00:35:06,704
EVEN MAN BUNKS UP.
868
00:35:06,737 --> 00:35:09,474
THERE'S ONE FOR YOU.
869
00:35:09,507 --> 00:35:11,342
ONE FOR YOU.
ON 3.
870
00:35:11,375 --> 00:35:14,178
1, 2, 3, FLIP.
871
00:35:15,313 --> 00:35:16,781
HEADS.
HEADS.
872
00:35:16,814 --> 00:35:18,282
TAILS! HA HA!
873
00:35:18,316 --> 00:35:19,717
SHIT.
874
00:35:19,750 --> 00:35:21,586
YOU SHOULD KNOW, JON,
THAT I LIKE TO SLEEP...
875
00:35:21,619 --> 00:35:23,221
AU NATUREL.
876
00:35:25,590 --> 00:35:26,624
[DAVID LAUGHS]
877
00:35:26,657 --> 00:35:27,892
Jon: JERK.
878
00:35:29,393 --> 00:35:30,561
[SIGHS]
879
00:35:32,396 --> 00:35:34,365
CAN'T BELIEVE
MY SISTER'S PREGNANT.
880
00:35:34,398 --> 00:35:36,634
OH, UNCLE KEATON.
881
00:35:38,402 --> 00:35:40,271
YOU KNOW, KEATON,
I'VE BEEN WONDERING,
882
00:35:40,304 --> 00:35:41,672
IF I HAVE SEX
WITH A PREGNANT WOMAN,
883
00:35:41,706 --> 00:35:42,940
IS THAT CHILD ABUSE?
884
00:35:44,775 --> 00:35:47,645
THAT DEPENDS
ON THE SIZE
OF YOUR PENIS, JON.
885
00:35:51,616 --> 00:35:52,950
YOU SHOULD BE ALL RIGHT.
886
00:35:52,984 --> 00:35:54,485
HMM, EXACTLY.
887
00:35:54,519 --> 00:35:55,620
MM-HMM.
888
00:36:00,291 --> 00:36:01,592
[SNIFFS]
889
00:36:14,639 --> 00:36:15,840
YOU KNOW, JANE...
890
00:36:15,873 --> 00:36:17,441
MM-HMM?
891
00:36:17,475 --> 00:36:20,545
I'VE BEEN MEANING
TO ASK YOU A QUESTION.
892
00:36:20,578 --> 00:36:22,580
SHOOT.
893
00:36:22,613 --> 00:36:24,515
WHEN YOU'RE--
894
00:36:24,549 --> 00:36:26,984
YOU KNOW...
895
00:36:27,018 --> 00:36:28,920
PREGNANT?
896
00:36:28,953 --> 00:36:30,688
RIGHT.
897
00:36:30,721 --> 00:36:32,723
CAN YOU STILL...
898
00:36:34,825 --> 00:36:36,460
YOU KNOW?
899
00:36:38,462 --> 00:36:40,598
HAVE SEX?
900
00:36:40,631 --> 00:36:41,933
EXACTLY.
901
00:36:45,469 --> 00:36:49,273
WELL, YOU CAN,
BUT, UM...
902
00:36:51,342 --> 00:36:55,846
I PREFER TO JUST GIVE
A REALLY GOOD BLOW JOB.
903
00:36:56,948 --> 00:36:58,482
NIGHT.
904
00:37:10,361 --> 00:37:13,531
[DOOR CREAKING]
905
00:37:48,065 --> 00:37:49,700
[WHISPERING]
Carla.
906
00:37:50,801 --> 00:37:52,103
WHAT?
907
00:37:52,136 --> 00:37:53,971
Are you sleeping?
908
00:37:54,005 --> 00:37:57,575
[CHUCKLES]
DO I SOUND ASLEEP?
909
00:37:57,608 --> 00:37:59,777
I NEED A PLACE
TO SLEEP.
910
00:37:59,810 --> 00:38:01,646
YOU HAVE A PLACE
TO SLEEP.
911
00:38:01,679 --> 00:38:03,681
WHAT? UHH!
912
00:38:03,714 --> 00:38:04,915
CARLA!
913
00:38:04,949 --> 00:38:07,718
JON, BLOW THIS.
914
00:38:07,752 --> 00:38:08,986
STOP IT!
915
00:38:09,020 --> 00:38:10,488
ATTACK!
916
00:38:11,722 --> 00:38:13,324
[DOOR OPENS]
917
00:38:14,425 --> 00:38:15,826
[DOOR CLOSES]
918
00:38:22,033 --> 00:38:23,567
IAN?
919
00:38:32,009 --> 00:38:33,744
[KNOCKS ON DOOR]
920
00:38:33,778 --> 00:38:34,979
IAN?
921
00:38:37,148 --> 00:38:38,816
[KNOCKS]
922
00:38:38,849 --> 00:38:40,351
IAN?
923
00:38:45,156 --> 00:38:47,825
IAN...
924
00:38:47,858 --> 00:38:49,460
I'M SO GLAD
YOU MADE IT.
925
00:38:49,493 --> 00:38:52,063
[DROWSY]
HUH? I'M SLEEPING.
926
00:38:52,096 --> 00:38:53,931
WE'LL TALK
IN THE MORNING.
927
00:38:53,964 --> 00:38:55,700
OK.
928
00:39:23,961 --> 00:39:25,429
IAN...
929
00:39:28,132 --> 00:39:30,701
I JUST WANT YOU TO KNOW
HOW DELIGHTED I AM
930
00:39:30,735 --> 00:39:32,069
THAT YOU'VE COME.
931
00:39:40,745 --> 00:39:43,214
OK, LOOK, I--
I HAVE SOMETHING
TO SAY TO YOU,
932
00:39:43,247 --> 00:39:46,550
AND IF YOU WILL
JUST LET ME SAY IT
WITHOUT INTERRUPTING,
933
00:39:46,584 --> 00:39:49,186
I THINK I CAN
GET THROUGH IT.
934
00:39:51,222 --> 00:39:53,691
I REALIZED WHEN
I DIDN'T HEAR FROM YOU
935
00:39:53,724 --> 00:39:54,892
AFTER YOUR MOTHER DIED--
936
00:39:56,594 --> 00:39:57,928
WELL, I TRIED
TO THINK BACK
937
00:39:57,962 --> 00:39:59,897
TO WHEN IT WAS
THAT WE LAST TALKED,
938
00:39:59,930 --> 00:40:03,067
AND I REALIZED THAT WE--
939
00:40:05,536 --> 00:40:07,805
WELL, THAT YOUR MOTHER
ALWAYS TALKED FOR US,
940
00:40:07,838 --> 00:40:10,741
AND THAT WE--
941
00:40:10,775 --> 00:40:12,710
WE NEVER REALLY TALKED.
942
00:40:14,912 --> 00:40:17,014
I REALIZE I WAS WORKING,
943
00:40:17,047 --> 00:40:20,885
BUT, SEE, WHEN YOU OWN
YOUR OWN BUSINESS, YOU--
944
00:40:20,918 --> 00:40:23,954
YOU GET CAUGHT UP IN
THE DAY-TO-DAY OPERATIONS,
945
00:40:23,988 --> 00:40:28,559
AND YOU JUST-- YOU START
PUTTING OTHER THINGS SECOND.
946
00:40:30,528 --> 00:40:32,596
SEE, MY GENERATION
THOUGHT THAT WORKING
947
00:40:32,630 --> 00:40:35,533
WAS THE BEST WAY TO TAKE CARE
OF OUR FAMILIES.
948
00:40:38,669 --> 00:40:40,004
I'VE THOUGHT ABOUT THAT.
949
00:40:43,774 --> 00:40:45,209
THEN I LOOK AT
THAT PHOTOGRAPH OF YOU
950
00:40:45,242 --> 00:40:49,213
THAT I ALWAYS KEEP
ON MY DESK, AND...
951
00:40:49,246 --> 00:40:51,782
IT'S 20 YEARS OLD,
AND I JUST--
952
00:40:51,816 --> 00:40:53,551
I JUST-- I DON'T KNOW,
953
00:40:53,584 --> 00:40:56,854
HOW DID I NOT NOTICE
THE TIME SLIP BY?
954
00:41:06,997 --> 00:41:10,034
SO WHAT I WOULD
LIKE TO DO IF I CAN
955
00:41:10,067 --> 00:41:14,071
IS I WOULD LIKE
TO TRY TO MAKE IT UP
TO YOU SOMEHOW,
956
00:41:14,104 --> 00:41:16,974
OR-- OR WE CAN
JUST START AGAIN.
957
00:41:19,743 --> 00:41:23,747
'CAUSE YOU'RE MY SON,
AND I'M YOUR FATHER.
958
00:41:23,781 --> 00:41:25,883
I MEAN, IF-- IF--
IF YOU WANT TO.
959
00:41:28,586 --> 00:41:30,287
SO THAT'S WHAT
I WANTED TO TELL YOU...
960
00:41:32,590 --> 00:41:34,725
THAT I LOVE YOU.
961
00:41:36,894 --> 00:41:41,732
OH, MY SON.
MY BEAUTIFUL SON.
962
00:41:41,765 --> 00:41:43,300
WHAT--JON!
WHOA!
963
00:41:43,334 --> 00:41:46,237
WHY DID YOU LET ME
GO ON AND ON LIKE THAT?
964
00:41:46,270 --> 00:41:48,973
I JUST-- AND JUST
MAKE A FOOL OUT OF MYSELF?
965
00:41:49,006 --> 00:41:51,242
MR. WICKHAM, PLEASE,
966
00:41:51,275 --> 00:41:53,611
YOU DIDN'T MAKE A FOOL
OUT OF YOURSELF.
967
00:41:53,644 --> 00:41:56,046
LOOK, I'M SORRY...
968
00:41:56,080 --> 00:41:57,882
BUT THAT'S
THE MOST BEAUTIFUL THING
969
00:41:57,915 --> 00:41:59,283
I'VE EVER HEARD
ANYONE EVER SAY.
970
00:41:59,316 --> 00:42:02,353
OH, JON.
PLEASE, JUST--
971
00:42:02,386 --> 00:42:04,755
Jon: MR. WICKHAM?
972
00:42:04,788 --> 00:42:06,090
LOOK,
I'M VERY SORRY,
973
00:42:06,123 --> 00:42:07,925
BUT WHEN IAN
DIDN'T SHOW UP,
974
00:42:07,958 --> 00:42:09,126
I DIDN'T THINK
THAT ANYBODY
WOULD MIND IF I--
975
00:42:09,159 --> 00:42:10,995
IF I SLEPT THERE.
976
00:42:11,028 --> 00:42:12,796
WELL, IT'S TIME
TO GET UP ANYWAY,
ISN'T IT?
977
00:42:12,830 --> 00:42:14,899
YOU'LL WANT TO GET
AN EARLY START BACK.
978
00:42:16,834 --> 00:42:19,904
[SIGHS]
979
00:42:19,937 --> 00:42:22,072
IAN? OH HO HO!
980
00:42:22,106 --> 00:42:25,809
OH, GREAT, HERE YOU ARE
ON THE GODDAMN COUCH!
981
00:42:25,843 --> 00:42:27,211
AH!
982
00:42:27,244 --> 00:42:29,847
WHAT THE HELL
WAS I THINKING?
983
00:42:29,880 --> 00:42:31,682
IAN, BUDDY!
984
00:42:31,715 --> 00:42:33,217
LET ME TELL YOU,
YOUR DAD IS GREAT!
985
00:42:33,250 --> 00:42:34,752
I'M LEAVING.
986
00:42:37,855 --> 00:42:39,089
IAN?
987
00:42:39,123 --> 00:42:40,324
Keaton: JON,
WHERE'S HE GOING?
988
00:42:40,357 --> 00:42:41,625
OH, HE'S LEAVING.
989
00:42:41,659 --> 00:42:42,893
David: OH, NO, HE'S NOT!
990
00:42:42,927 --> 00:42:44,395
OH, SHIT!
HE'S LEAVING!
991
00:42:44,428 --> 00:42:45,763
IAN!
992
00:42:45,796 --> 00:42:47,865
IAN, COME BACK HERE!
993
00:42:49,366 --> 00:42:51,201
HEY! BREAKFAST!
994
00:42:51,235 --> 00:42:52,836
EVERYBODY UP!
995
00:42:52,870 --> 00:42:55,239
I BROKE THE PAN.
I'M COOKING SOMETHING ELSE.
996
00:42:55,272 --> 00:42:56,774
Richard: COME ON!
EVERYBODY UP!
997
00:42:56,807 --> 00:42:59,343
OH, SHIT.
HE'S COOKING AGAIN.
998
00:43:01,145 --> 00:43:02,646
IAN, WHERE ARE YOU GOING?
999
00:43:02,680 --> 00:43:03,981
OH, A LITTLE PLACE
CALLED "NOT HERE."
1000
00:43:04,014 --> 00:43:05,249
IAN?
1001
00:43:05,282 --> 00:43:06,684
WHAT?!
1002
00:43:06,717 --> 00:43:08,085
WOULD YOU PLEASE
ASK THIS WOMAN
1003
00:43:08,118 --> 00:43:09,787
TO STOP
HARASSING ME?
1004
00:43:09,820 --> 00:43:12,723
OK, I KNOW MY WAY
AROUND A KITCHEN.
1005
00:43:12,756 --> 00:43:14,224
NO, NO, JUST--
1006
00:43:14,258 --> 00:43:16,026
AND CLEAN UP AND
HAVE SOME BREAKFAST
1007
00:43:16,060 --> 00:43:17,728
BEFORE YOU TAKE OFF
FOR THE SLOPES,
ALL RIGHT?
1008
00:43:17,761 --> 00:43:18,963
OK, LOOK, I KNOW--
1009
00:43:20,230 --> 00:43:21,899
FUCK!
1010
00:43:21,932 --> 00:43:23,434
COME ON.
1011
00:43:23,467 --> 00:43:24,902
YOU'LL THANK US LATER.
1012
00:43:26,804 --> 00:43:28,739
WHERE--
WHERE ARE YOU, DAD?!
1013
00:43:28,772 --> 00:43:30,774
Richard:
IN THE KITCHEN.
1014
00:43:34,278 --> 00:43:36,013
WELL, LOOK AT YOU.
[CHUCKLES]
1015
00:43:38,182 --> 00:43:39,850
YOU'VE NEVER BEEN
MORE BEAUTIFUL.
1016
00:43:41,251 --> 00:43:42,920
YOU'RE A PRINCE
AMONG MEN.
1017
00:43:44,421 --> 00:43:46,290
Richard: IAN!
1018
00:43:48,792 --> 00:43:50,327
JUST LET ME--
PLEASE.
1019
00:43:50,361 --> 00:43:53,130
WE HAVE TO TALK.
THIS PASSIVE-AGGRESSIVE SHIT--
1020
00:43:53,163 --> 00:43:55,099
IAN, YOUR FATHER
IS GONNA COOK.
1021
00:43:55,132 --> 00:43:56,900
[SCOFFS]
LIKE HE CAN COOK.
1022
00:43:56,934 --> 00:43:58,969
EXCUSE ME, HAVE YOU
SEEN THE CARNAGE?
1023
00:43:59,003 --> 00:44:00,704
WHAT?
I'LL BUY A NEW ONE.
1024
00:44:00,738 --> 00:44:02,006
I DON'T KNOW--WHAT
IS THE BIG DEAL?
1025
00:44:02,039 --> 00:44:03,741
SOMEBODY COULD HAVE
LOST AN EYE.
1026
00:44:03,774 --> 00:44:04,942
OH,
THAT'S RIDICULOUS.
1027
00:44:04,975 --> 00:44:06,877
DO YOU WANT TO TALK?
IAN...
1028
00:44:06,910 --> 00:44:08,779
I THOUGHT I WOULD
MAKE YOU SOMETHING
NICE FOR BREAKFAST.
1029
00:44:08,812 --> 00:44:11,248
BREAKFAST.
1030
00:44:11,281 --> 00:44:13,283
MAY I?
1031
00:44:13,317 --> 00:44:16,320
I WANT TO JUST--
WHATEVER.
1032
00:44:16,353 --> 00:44:18,689
HI.
HEY.
1033
00:44:20,124 --> 00:44:22,726
YOU KNOW, UH...
1034
00:44:22,760 --> 00:44:24,228
[CLEARS THROAT]
1035
00:44:24,261 --> 00:44:26,096
WE DON'T REALLY HAVE
TIME FOR BREAKFAST, OK?
1036
00:44:26,130 --> 00:44:27,731
YEAH.
1037
00:44:27,765 --> 00:44:29,066
LIFT LINES ARE GONNA BE
3 HOURS LONG AS IT IS,
1038
00:44:29,099 --> 00:44:30,334
SO WHY DON'T
WE JUST GO SKIING?
1039
00:44:30,367 --> 00:44:32,136
WE CAME TO SKI,
AND WE'LL, UH--
1040
00:44:32,169 --> 00:44:33,237
WE CAN ALWAYS
TALK LATER.
1041
00:44:33,270 --> 00:44:35,039
LOT TO TALK.
1042
00:44:35,072 --> 00:44:36,840
LET'S GET OUT
OF THE KITCHEN,
AND WE'LL GO SKIING.
1043
00:44:36,874 --> 00:44:38,809
OK, WE'LL LEAVE THAT.
1044
00:44:53,190 --> 00:44:55,259
OH, MY GOD.
1045
00:44:55,292 --> 00:44:57,161
Hans: GOOD MORNING, GROUP.
1046
00:44:57,194 --> 00:44:59,963
WHAT A VERY LUCKY
AND SPECIAL GROUP
OF PEOPLE YOU ARE,
1047
00:44:59,997 --> 00:45:02,032
BECAUSE YOU WILL BE
LEARNING TO SKI
1048
00:45:02,066 --> 00:45:03,767
FROM HANS. THAT IS ME.
1049
00:45:03,801 --> 00:45:04,902
WHAT, YOU KNOW HIM?
1050
00:45:04,935 --> 00:45:07,004
SORT OF.
1051
00:45:07,037 --> 00:45:08,839
Hans: I'VE BEEN SKIING
SINCE I WAS KNEE-HIGH
TO A GRASSHOPPER.
1052
00:45:08,872 --> 00:45:10,374
NOW, I'M GOING TO TELL YOU
RIGHT OFF THE BAT
1053
00:45:10,407 --> 00:45:12,076
THAT I'M GOING
TO TEACH YOU TO SKI
1054
00:45:12,109 --> 00:45:15,479
THE WAY WHAT I LEARNED
HOW TO SKI MYSELF,
1055
00:45:15,512 --> 00:45:18,515
WHAT IS THE BEST WAY
IN THE WORLD.
1056
00:45:18,549 --> 00:45:20,050
THERE ARE ONLY 2 RULES.
1057
00:45:20,084 --> 00:45:22,986
ONE IS NEVER
LEAVE THE GROUP,
1058
00:45:23,020 --> 00:45:26,490
AND RULE NUMBER 2 IS
DO EXACTLY WHAT I SAY
1059
00:45:26,523 --> 00:45:28,192
AT ALL TIMES
WHEN I SAY IT.
1060
00:45:28,225 --> 00:45:30,794
SHOULD I ASK YOU
TO SKEWER YOURSELF
1061
00:45:30,828 --> 00:45:32,563
WITH YOUR SKI POLE
IN THE GENITALS, YOU MUST.
1062
00:45:32,596 --> 00:45:35,365
IT COULD SAVE YOUR LIFE
LATER ON AT SOME POINT.
1063
00:45:35,399 --> 00:45:37,201
SHOULD I EVEN
ASK YOU PERHAPS,
1064
00:45:37,234 --> 00:45:38,902
NO REASON,
OUT OF LEFT FIELD,
1065
00:45:38,936 --> 00:45:41,805
TO JUST TAKE A LITTLE BITE
OF A SNOWBALL, YOU MUST.
1066
00:45:41,839 --> 00:45:43,307
IT COULD SAVE YOUR LIFE.
1067
00:45:44,908 --> 00:45:46,343
IT IS YOU.
Carla: YUP.
1068
00:45:46,376 --> 00:45:48,378
CA--
CAR--
1069
00:45:48,412 --> 00:45:50,214
CARLA.
CARLA.
1070
00:45:50,247 --> 00:45:51,515
CARLA!
I'M WORKING WITH CARLA!
1071
00:45:51,548 --> 00:45:53,183
EVERYONE ELSE,
DO NOT LEAVE THE GROUP!
1072
00:45:53,217 --> 00:45:55,853
DO EXACTLY WHAT I SAY
WHEN I SAY IT AT ALL TIMES!
1073
00:45:57,354 --> 00:45:59,056
I'M GOING TO GIVE YOU
A PRIVATE LESSON.
1074
00:45:59,089 --> 00:46:00,491
OK.
1075
00:46:00,524 --> 00:46:02,292
DO YOU KNOW THE EXPRESSION
THE BIGGER THEY ARE,
1076
00:46:02,326 --> 00:46:03,494
THE HARDER THEY FALL?
1077
00:46:03,527 --> 00:46:06,163
JA.
JA.
1078
00:46:06,196 --> 00:46:10,100
SO, OK, GIVE UP TO ME
THE TIP OF YOUR POLE.
1079
00:46:10,134 --> 00:46:12,136
JA!
1080
00:46:12,169 --> 00:46:13,137
EVERYONE MAY NOW LOOK.
1081
00:46:13,170 --> 00:46:15,005
YOU SEE CARLA HAS FALLEN.
1082
00:46:15,038 --> 00:46:17,875
I NOW GIVE HER
WHAT IS KNOWN
AS A POLE-UP.
1083
00:46:17,908 --> 00:46:19,143
OOF!
1084
00:46:19,176 --> 00:46:20,477
THAT IS...
1085
00:46:20,511 --> 00:46:22,112
HMM?
1086
00:46:22,146 --> 00:46:24,214
MEIN GOTT.
1087
00:46:24,248 --> 00:46:25,849
YOU ARE THE GOODS.
1088
00:46:25,883 --> 00:46:27,384
EVERYONE CAN STOP RELAXING!
1089
00:46:27,417 --> 00:46:29,153
WE HAVE ONE NATURAL
IN THE GROUP!
1090
00:46:29,186 --> 00:46:32,623
THE REST OF YOU ARE PROBABLY
NOT EVEN WORTH MENTIONING,
1091
00:46:32,656 --> 00:46:34,124
BUT WE WILL
CONTINUE ANYWAY.
1092
00:46:36,059 --> 00:46:38,595
♪ WATCH ME, 'CAUSE
I'M KING OF THE HILL ♪
1093
00:46:38,629 --> 00:46:41,165
♪ SET ME IN MOTION,
YEAH, YOU GIVE ME A THRILL ♪
1094
00:46:41,198 --> 00:46:43,467
♪ WHEN YOU COME NEAR ME,
WHEN YOU COME NEAR ME ♪
1095
00:46:43,500 --> 00:46:46,870
♪ I CAN'T KEEP STILL
1096
00:46:50,474 --> 00:46:53,110
♪ TILL THEN,
I CAN'T KEEP STILL ♪
1097
00:46:53,143 --> 00:46:55,145
♪ NO, I JUST CAN'T
KEEP STILL ♪
1098
00:46:55,179 --> 00:46:57,614
♪ BE MY BABY,
SAY YOU WILL... ♪
1099
00:47:00,250 --> 00:47:02,085
WELL, YOU'RE GOOD,
MR. WICKHAM, DAMN GOOD.
1100
00:47:02,119 --> 00:47:04,888
RICHARD.
CALL ME RICHARD, OK?
1101
00:47:04,922 --> 00:47:06,056
NOW, WHERE'S IAN?
1102
00:47:06,089 --> 00:47:07,324
OH, HE'S COMING.
1103
00:47:07,357 --> 00:47:08,525
IS HE ALL RIGHT?
1104
00:47:08,559 --> 00:47:09,927
HE'S FINE.
HE'S FINE.
1105
00:47:09,960 --> 00:47:11,261
WELL, THEN, SHALL WE?
1106
00:47:11,295 --> 00:47:12,663
DON'T YOU GUYS WANT
TO WAIT FOR IAN?
1107
00:47:12,696 --> 00:47:14,531
NAH, LET'S GO.
THE HECK WITH IAN.
1108
00:47:14,565 --> 00:47:16,200
HERE WE GO.
1109
00:47:16,233 --> 00:47:17,301
SEE YOU BELOW!
1110
00:47:17,334 --> 00:47:18,969
LOSERS.
1111
00:47:19,002 --> 00:47:21,238
♪ WATCH ME COMING IN
FOR THE KILL ♪
1112
00:47:21,271 --> 00:47:23,974
♪ GOTTA KISS THOSE LIPS,
GOTTA HAVE MY FILL ♪
1113
00:47:24,007 --> 00:47:26,143
♪ MAKE ME SHIVER
1114
00:47:26,176 --> 00:47:27,578
♪ FEEL THOSE CHILLS
1115
00:47:27,611 --> 00:47:31,181
♪ DO ME TILL
I CAN'T KEEP STILL... ♪
1116
00:47:34,151 --> 00:47:36,253
OH, MY GOD.
OH, MY GOD.
1117
00:47:36,286 --> 00:47:38,155
IAN?
ARE YOU ALL RIGHT?
1118
00:47:38,188 --> 00:47:39,656
[WEAK]
I CAN'T FEEL MY LEGS.
1119
00:47:39,690 --> 00:47:42,192
I CAN'T FEEL MY LEGS.
I THINK I BROKE MY BACK.
1120
00:47:42,226 --> 00:47:43,360
OH, MY GOD.
DON'T MOVE.
1121
00:47:43,393 --> 00:47:45,229
DON'T...MOVE!
1122
00:47:45,262 --> 00:47:47,164
[GASPING]
GOD. OH, GOD!
1123
00:47:47,197 --> 00:47:50,100
OH, I SEE THE LIGHT.
I SEE THE LIGHT.
1124
00:47:50,133 --> 00:47:51,235
I SEE THE LIGHT--
1125
00:47:51,268 --> 00:47:53,203
MEDIC!
MEDIC!
1126
00:47:53,237 --> 00:47:55,272
HOW'S MY FACE?
HOW'S MY FACE?
1127
00:47:55,305 --> 00:47:57,608
I'VE ALWAYS WANTED
AN OPEN CASKET, SERIOUSLY.
1128
00:47:57,641 --> 00:48:00,143
OH, GOD!
YOU KNOW WHAT?
1129
00:48:00,177 --> 00:48:02,179
I'VE HAD IT WITH YOU
AND YOUR FATHER
1130
00:48:02,212 --> 00:48:04,348
AND THIS WHOLE
SHITTY WEEKEND!
1131
00:48:06,083 --> 00:48:07,451
[LAUGHS]
1132
00:48:07,484 --> 00:48:09,686
HEY.
HI!
1133
00:48:09,720 --> 00:48:11,088
YOU LOOK GOOD.
1134
00:48:11,121 --> 00:48:12,990
YEAH, I FALL DOWN
REALLY WELL.
1135
00:48:13,023 --> 00:48:16,226
SO, UH, SHE'S GETTIN'
A PRIVATE LESSON, HUH?
1136
00:48:16,260 --> 00:48:19,229
YEAH, I FELL IN LOVE
WITH A TEACHER ONCE.
1137
00:48:19,263 --> 00:48:20,264
YEAH, AND NOT SINCE?
1138
00:48:20,297 --> 00:48:22,699
IT'S BEEN A WHILE.
1139
00:48:22,733 --> 00:48:25,135
THANK YOU. UGH.
1140
00:48:25,168 --> 00:48:26,637
UGH.
1141
00:48:26,670 --> 00:48:27,671
YOU ALL RIGHT?
1142
00:48:27,704 --> 00:48:29,306
SO, UH...
1143
00:48:29,339 --> 00:48:31,208
THERE'S SOME TRUTH
TO THE RUMOR?
1144
00:48:32,542 --> 00:48:34,444
OH, I BELIEVE
EVERYTHING I HEAR.
1145
00:48:34,478 --> 00:48:36,079
YOU'RE
STILL A VIRGIN?
1146
00:48:36,113 --> 00:48:37,681
EXCUSE ME?
1147
00:48:37,714 --> 00:48:40,017
LISA SAID YOU'RE
STILL A VIRGIN.
1148
00:48:40,050 --> 00:48:42,286
[SIGHS]
1149
00:48:43,620 --> 00:48:45,289
WELL, YOU KNOW,
I MEAN, I'VE--
1150
00:48:45,322 --> 00:48:46,990
KISSED AND STUFF?
1151
00:48:47,024 --> 00:48:48,592
[LAUGHTER]
YEAH.
1152
00:48:48,625 --> 00:48:50,460
DAVID.
1153
00:48:50,494 --> 00:48:52,296
LOOK...
I KNOW IT'S SILLY,
1154
00:48:52,329 --> 00:48:55,532
BUT I REALLY WANTED
TO WAIT FOR SOMEONE SPECIAL.
1155
00:48:55,565 --> 00:48:58,035
I JUST NEVER THOUGHT
IT WOULD TAKE THIS LONG.
1156
00:48:58,068 --> 00:48:59,236
[LAUGHING]
1157
00:48:59,269 --> 00:49:01,038
SO, WAIT. YOU--
1158
00:49:01,071 --> 00:49:03,206
YOU HAVE NEVER DONE
THE DIRTY DEED?
1159
00:49:03,240 --> 00:49:07,477
WELL, HOW EXACTLY WOULD YOU
DEFINE THAT IN MY CASE?
1160
00:49:12,482 --> 00:49:14,251
TECHNICALLY A VIRGIN.
1161
00:49:14,284 --> 00:49:16,320
SPIRITUALLY...A WHORE.
1162
00:49:16,353 --> 00:49:18,255
[LAUGHS]
UGH.
1163
00:49:18,288 --> 00:49:20,257
[SIGHS]
1164
00:49:20,290 --> 00:49:23,226
DEVA. DO YOU KNOW
WHAT THIS IS?
1165
00:49:23,260 --> 00:49:25,062
WHAT'S THIS WORD?
DEVA?
1166
00:49:25,095 --> 00:49:27,331
HMM...A SINGER?
1167
00:49:27,364 --> 00:49:29,032
[LAUGHS]
1168
00:49:29,066 --> 00:49:30,600
NO. NO.
1169
00:49:30,634 --> 00:49:32,703
SILLY. DEVA IS
A GHOST WHAT LIVES
IN THE FOREST.
1170
00:49:32,736 --> 00:49:34,204
SURE.
1171
00:49:34,237 --> 00:49:35,605
IT'S--WELL,
IT'S VERY SUBTLE.
1172
00:49:35,639 --> 00:49:37,741
ONLY A TRAINED EYE
CAN ACTUALLY SEE IT.
1173
00:49:37,774 --> 00:49:39,376
THE SPIRIT GHOST.
1174
00:49:39,409 --> 00:49:40,811
MM-HMM.
1175
00:49:40,844 --> 00:49:44,247
MY LORD, DEVA.
RIGHT THERE.
LOOK THERE.
1176
00:49:44,281 --> 00:49:45,415
FOLLOW THE POLE.
1177
00:49:45,449 --> 00:49:46,750
FOLLOW THE POLE,
YOU SEE?
1178
00:49:46,783 --> 00:49:48,051
YOU SEE
THE DEVA THERE?
1179
00:49:48,085 --> 00:49:49,453
WHAT AM I LOOKING FOR?
1180
00:49:49,486 --> 00:49:51,088
WELL, IT'S SO SUBTLE.
IT'S A MIST.
1181
00:49:51,121 --> 00:49:55,292
IT IS A MIST, A COHESION
OF THE ENERGY OF LIFE.
1182
00:49:55,325 --> 00:49:57,260
[SIGHS]
1183
00:49:57,294 --> 00:49:58,628
MM-HMM.
1184
00:49:58,662 --> 00:50:00,263
IT'S--
YOU CAN'T SEE IT.
1185
00:50:00,297 --> 00:50:01,531
I CAN'T SEE IT.
1186
00:50:01,565 --> 00:50:03,133
YOU CAN'T SEE.
IT'S CLEAR.
1187
00:50:03,166 --> 00:50:06,103
IT'S SO CLEAR TO ME.
THIS IS BECAUSE...
1188
00:50:06,136 --> 00:50:08,538
WELL, YOUR CHAKRAS
ARE BLOCKED.
1189
00:50:08,572 --> 00:50:10,474
MM-HMM.
1190
00:50:10,507 --> 00:50:13,543
YES, MEDIATION,
MEDITATION, IS--
1191
00:50:13,577 --> 00:50:15,278
IT'S THE ONLY CURE.
1192
00:50:15,312 --> 00:50:17,514
THE PENETRATION
OF THE DIRTY,
1193
00:50:17,547 --> 00:50:19,750
ROTTEN, CLOUDED
CONSCIOUS MIND
1194
00:50:19,783 --> 00:50:22,352
INTO THE WET,
DARK, VILE,
SNAPPING TURTLE
1195
00:50:22,386 --> 00:50:23,754
OF THE SUBCONSCIOUS.
PLUNGING!
1196
00:50:23,787 --> 00:50:26,123
THE PLUNGING,
PLUNGING, PLUNGING
1197
00:50:26,156 --> 00:50:27,858
OVER AND OVER AGAIN,
1198
00:50:27,891 --> 00:50:29,326
YOU LIKE
THIS PLUNGING?
1199
00:50:29,359 --> 00:50:31,128
[GIGGLES] I LOVE
THE WAY YOU TALK.
1200
00:50:31,161 --> 00:50:33,296
YES, WELL,
AT LAST, AFTER ALL,
1201
00:50:33,330 --> 00:50:35,732
YOU HAVE TO FIND OUT
THE MEANING OF LIFE.
1202
00:50:35,766 --> 00:50:37,601
[LAUGHS]
1203
00:51:16,440 --> 00:51:17,908
IS IT REALLY SUCH
A TERRIBLE THING
1204
00:51:17,941 --> 00:51:21,144
THAT I WANNA MEND
THIS RELATIONSHIP?
1205
00:51:21,178 --> 00:51:22,646
YOU'RE MY SON.
1206
00:51:24,414 --> 00:51:26,183
WHAT DO YOU WANT?
1207
00:51:27,617 --> 00:51:29,619
ISN'T IT OBVIOUS?
1208
00:51:29,653 --> 00:51:31,421
OK, JUST-- JUST SAY--
1209
00:51:31,455 --> 00:51:33,256
SAY IT, OK?
JUST LAY IT OUT THERE.
1210
00:51:33,290 --> 00:51:34,658
OK, I'M SORRY.
I REALLY AM.
1211
00:51:34,691 --> 00:51:36,460
I'M SORRY, THIS--
THIS-- THIS HAS--
1212
00:51:36,493 --> 00:51:37,594
THIS HAS BEEN
A MISTAKE.
1213
00:51:37,627 --> 00:51:38,829
I-- I SEE THAT NOW.
1214
00:51:38,862 --> 00:51:41,565
IT'S JUST...
1215
00:51:41,598 --> 00:51:43,733
I FEEL LIKE I'M NOT
A GOOD FATHER
1216
00:51:43,767 --> 00:51:46,470
WHEN YOU WON'T EVEN
TALK TO ME.
1217
00:51:46,503 --> 00:51:48,405
SEE, I-- I WANT US
TO BE ABLE TO BE--
1218
00:51:48,438 --> 00:51:50,807
I WANT US
TO BE SPEAKING.
I WANNA BE ABLE TO--
1219
00:51:50,841 --> 00:51:53,743
FOR HEAVEN'S SAKES,
PICK UP THE PHONE
AND TALK TO YOU.
1220
00:51:53,777 --> 00:51:55,479
[LAUGHING]
1221
00:51:55,512 --> 00:51:56,847
NOT A GOOD FATHER?
1222
00:51:56,880 --> 00:51:58,348
WELL, YOU'RE--
YOU'RE NOT A GOOD FATHER.
1223
00:51:58,381 --> 00:51:59,583
YOU'RE NOT REALLY
A FATHER AT ALL.
1224
00:51:59,616 --> 00:52:00,817
ALL RIGHT.
1225
00:52:00,851 --> 00:52:02,552
THANK YOU.
1226
00:52:02,586 --> 00:52:03,820
I KNOW WE HAVE
PROBLEMS, IAN,
1227
00:52:03,854 --> 00:52:05,188
BUT I DON'T
THINK THIS--
1228
00:52:05,222 --> 00:52:06,389
WHERE-- WHERE--
JUST TELL ME,
1229
00:52:06,423 --> 00:52:07,891
WHERE WERE YOU
WHEN IT MATTERED?
1230
00:52:09,459 --> 00:52:10,594
I WAS WORKING.
1231
00:52:10,627 --> 00:52:11,895
[SCOFFS]
COME ON, WORK.
1232
00:52:11,928 --> 00:52:13,396
WHAT, YOU-- YOU OWN
YOUR OWN BUSINESS.
1233
00:52:13,430 --> 00:52:15,198
YOU CAN TAKE ALL
THE TIME OFF IN THE WORLD.
1234
00:52:15,232 --> 00:52:16,399
THAT'S-- THAT'S--
THAT-- THAT'S--
1235
00:52:16,433 --> 00:52:17,567
THAT'S TRUE.
1236
00:52:17,601 --> 00:52:19,503
WELL, WHAT WAS IT?
IS IT OTHER WOMEN?
1237
00:52:19,536 --> 00:52:21,304
DON'T BE RIDICULOUS, IAN.
1238
00:52:21,338 --> 00:52:23,440
OK. OK, NOT
TO HEAR IT FROM MOM.
1239
00:52:23,473 --> 00:52:25,408
YOUR MOTHER
NEVER THOUGHT THAT.
1240
00:52:26,510 --> 00:52:29,579
I-- YOU NEVER LOVED ME.
1241
00:52:29,613 --> 00:52:31,915
ALL RIGHT?
YOU JUST SAY THAT.
1242
00:52:31,948 --> 00:52:34,584
YOU NEVER LOVED ME.
1243
00:52:34,618 --> 00:52:36,219
RIGHT?
1244
00:52:37,654 --> 00:52:39,356
I MEAN, IT'S OK,
'CAUSE, YOU KNOW,
1245
00:52:39,389 --> 00:52:40,757
I'VE-- I'VE ACCEPTED IT,
BUT IF YOU'D SAY IT,
1246
00:52:40,790 --> 00:52:43,560
IT WOULD MAKE THINGS
A WHOLE LOT EASIER, YOU KNOW?
1247
00:52:43,593 --> 00:52:45,228
YOU KNOW,
BUT THIS WHOLE CHARADE
1248
00:52:45,262 --> 00:52:47,264
OF YOU, LIKE, YOU KNOW,
WANTING TO BE SUPERDAD
1249
00:52:47,297 --> 00:52:49,266
AND, LIKE, YOU KNOW,
UH, SUMMING UP YOUR LIFE
1250
00:52:49,299 --> 00:52:51,868
AND WANTING TO GET
A SOME GOLD STAR FATHERING
IS A BUNCH OF BULLSHIT,
1251
00:52:51,902 --> 00:52:53,637
IAN. IAN.
YOU KNOW?
1252
00:53:00,810 --> 00:53:02,812
YOU KNOW WHAT?
I'M-- I'M-- I'M JUST GONNA--
I'M GONNA GO HOME,
1253
00:53:02,846 --> 00:53:04,347
IF THAT'S
ALL RIGHT WITH YOU.
1254
00:53:04,381 --> 00:53:05,782
OF COURSE YOU ARE.
1255
00:53:29,306 --> 00:53:30,974
YOU REALLY DON'T HAVE TO.
I MEAN, I CAN CALL JON.
1256
00:53:31,007 --> 00:53:32,342
NOOO.
1257
00:53:32,375 --> 00:53:33,810
HE CAN
COME AND GET ME.
1258
00:53:33,843 --> 00:53:35,312
NO, DON'T CALL JON.
JON IS UNNECESSARY.
1259
00:53:35,345 --> 00:53:36,346
OK.
OK?
1260
00:53:36,379 --> 00:53:37,514
GOD, I'M SO STIFF.
1261
00:53:37,547 --> 00:53:38,982
I KNOW.
1262
00:53:39,015 --> 00:53:40,784
YOU KNOW, FROM SKIING.
I DIDN'T THINK IT'D BE--
1263
00:53:40,817 --> 00:53:42,652
WELL, IT'S
PARTIALLY SPIRITUAL,
PARTIALLY PHYSICAL,
1264
00:53:42,686 --> 00:53:43,820
PARTIALLY--
ALLOW ME.
1265
00:53:43,853 --> 00:53:44,888
OH.
1266
00:53:44,921 --> 00:53:46,356
[CHUCKLES]
1267
00:53:46,389 --> 00:53:47,624
I'M THE KIND OF GIRL
YOU MARRY.
1268
00:53:47,657 --> 00:53:49,025
YES. YES.
1269
00:53:49,059 --> 00:53:50,327
I CAN RESPECT THIS.
NO, I--
1270
00:53:50,360 --> 00:53:51,561
GET OFF ME NOW.
1271
00:53:51,595 --> 00:53:52,796
WHA-- WELL-- I--
KOMPLICK.
1272
00:53:52,829 --> 00:53:55,332
DO YOU KNOW
WHAT THIS MEANS?
1273
00:53:55,365 --> 00:53:56,633
KOMPLICK?
1274
00:53:56,666 --> 00:53:58,568
YES,
KOMPLICK.
NO.
1275
00:53:58,602 --> 00:54:00,570
IT MEANS-- IT MEANS
THE PERSON THAT
YOU FALL DEEPLY,
1276
00:54:00,604 --> 00:54:02,539
PASSIONATELY,
WILDLY IN LOVE--
1277
00:54:02,572 --> 00:54:04,708
THIS IS
THE FIRST SIGHTING.
1278
00:54:04,741 --> 00:54:05,942
HMM.
1279
00:54:05,976 --> 00:54:07,777
CARLA, THIS IS WHAT
HAS HAPPENED TO ME,
1280
00:54:07,811 --> 00:54:10,080
KOMPLICK
WITH YOU.
I AM IN LOVE
WITH YOU.
KOMPLICK.
1281
00:54:10,113 --> 00:54:12,349
OH, REALLY?
I SWEAR.
1282
00:54:12,382 --> 00:54:13,617
OK, WELL, MAYBE
WE COULD KISS.
1283
00:54:17,420 --> 00:54:18,955
DID YOU SAY
KOMPLICK?
1284
00:54:18,989 --> 00:54:21,291
YES,
KOMPLICK.
1285
00:54:23,526 --> 00:54:24,894
CAN YOU SAY
KOMPLICK?
1286
00:54:24,928 --> 00:54:26,696
YEAH, CERTAINLY.
1287
00:54:26,730 --> 00:54:27,797
OH!
OH!
1288
00:54:27,831 --> 00:54:29,799
[MOANING]
1289
00:54:29,833 --> 00:54:31,434
[HORN HONKS]
1290
00:54:31,468 --> 00:54:33,803
♪ HERE I AM
1291
00:54:33,837 --> 00:54:36,673
♪ STUCK IN THE MIDDLE,
DON'T YOU KNOW ♪
1292
00:54:36,706 --> 00:54:38,375
♪ HERE I AM...
1293
00:54:38,408 --> 00:54:39,609
Jane: NOW.
David: JUST STOP.
1294
00:54:39,643 --> 00:54:41,444
♪ STUCK IN THE MIDDLE...
1295
00:54:41,478 --> 00:54:42,646
NO!
1296
00:54:42,679 --> 00:54:43,880
I THOUGHT WE WERE
GONNA TALK.
1297
00:54:43,913 --> 00:54:46,016
WE CAN TALK.
THE TWO OF US.
1298
00:54:46,049 --> 00:54:47,484
GREAT. YOU TWO TALK.
1299
00:54:47,517 --> 00:54:48,752
NO. YOU'RE NOT
LEAVING THIS TABLE
1300
00:54:48,785 --> 00:54:49,886
UNTIL YOU
MAKE UP YOUR MIND.
1301
00:54:49,919 --> 00:54:51,488
KEATON, HELP ME.
1302
00:54:51,521 --> 00:54:52,956
I AM NOT GONNA
LET YOU RUIN YOUR LIFE.
1303
00:54:52,989 --> 00:54:54,891
ALL YOU HAVE TO DO
IS LOOK AROUND THE ROOM
AND PICK.
1304
00:54:54,924 --> 00:54:55,992
PICK WHAT?
1305
00:54:56,026 --> 00:54:57,427
ANYBODY.
1306
00:54:57,460 --> 00:54:58,828
PARDON ME
IF I CHALK IT UP
1307
00:54:58,862 --> 00:55:00,730
TO THE HORMONAL PSYCHOSIS
OF THE BUN IN YOUR OVEN.
1308
00:55:00,764 --> 00:55:02,899
HEY! ONE DAY, YOU ARE
GONNA WAKE UP OLD,
1309
00:55:02,932 --> 00:55:04,034
AND YOU'RE GONNA
STARE IN THE MIRROR
1310
00:55:04,067 --> 00:55:05,802
AT A WRINKLED,
LITTLE FACE,
1311
00:55:05,835 --> 00:55:07,671
AND YOU'RE GONNA REALIZE
YOUR WHOLE LIFE IS OVER,
1312
00:55:07,704 --> 00:55:08,972
AND YA STILL
HAVEN'T GOT THE BALLS
1313
00:55:09,005 --> 00:55:10,407
TO WALK ACROSS A ROOM
AND SAY HELLO.
1314
00:55:10,440 --> 00:55:12,075
FIRST OF ALL,
I'VE GOT GREAT GENES,
1315
00:55:12,108 --> 00:55:13,743
AND SECOND OF ALL,
IT'S MY LIFE, RIGHT?
1316
00:55:13,777 --> 00:55:14,911
PICK.
PICK.
1317
00:55:14,944 --> 00:55:16,513
KEATON.
1318
00:55:16,546 --> 00:55:18,815
PICK.
1319
00:55:18,848 --> 00:55:23,620
♪ STUCK IN THE MIDDLE
OF IT ALL... ♪
1320
00:55:23,653 --> 00:55:25,422
THE GUY
AT THE REFRESHMENT STAND.
1321
00:55:25,455 --> 00:55:26,856
WHICH GUY?
1322
00:55:29,025 --> 00:55:30,894
THE TALL ONE
WITH THE GRAY JACKET.
1323
00:55:30,927 --> 00:55:32,495
COOL.
1324
00:55:32,529 --> 00:55:34,130
OOH, HE'S GORGEOUS.
NOW GET OVER THERE.
1325
00:55:34,164 --> 00:55:35,765
GET OVER THERE AND WHAT?
1326
00:55:35,799 --> 00:55:37,534
COULD HE USE
MY MODUS OPERANDI ON A GUY
1327
00:55:37,567 --> 00:55:38,802
LIKE I DO ON A CHICK?
1328
00:55:38,835 --> 00:55:39,803
A CHICK?
1329
00:55:39,836 --> 00:55:40,937
A WOMAN.
1330
00:55:40,970 --> 00:55:43,006
LOOK, GUYS,
THIS IS RIDICULOUS. I--
1331
00:55:43,039 --> 00:55:44,441
SHUT UP, DAVID.
1332
00:55:44,474 --> 00:55:45,875
WHAT'S YOUR M.O.?
1333
00:55:45,909 --> 00:55:47,510
ASK A
WOMAN
SOMETHING
ABOUT HERSELF.
1334
00:55:47,544 --> 00:55:49,446
THEN I SHUT UP AND
LET HER DO THE TALKING.
1335
00:55:51,715 --> 00:55:53,717
AND THAT WORKS?
EVERY TIME.
1336
00:55:53,750 --> 00:55:56,986
SEE, THE KEY HERE IS TO ACT
LIKE YOU'RE REALLY LISTENING.
1337
00:55:57,020 --> 00:55:59,556
OH, MEN ARE PIGS.
1338
00:55:59,589 --> 00:56:00,690
AND WOMEN ARE?
1339
00:56:00,724 --> 00:56:02,058
PIG LOVERS.
1340
00:56:02,092 --> 00:56:03,626
NOW GET OVER THERE,
ASK HIM SOMETHING,
1341
00:56:03,660 --> 00:56:04,828
SHUT UP, AND PRETEND
YOU'RE LISTENING.
1342
00:56:04,861 --> 00:56:06,596
YOU THINK YOU CAN
HANDLE THAT?
1343
00:56:06,629 --> 00:56:07,964
WHAT AM I GONNA ASK HIM?
1344
00:56:07,997 --> 00:56:10,734
ASK HIM IF HE LIFTS.
GUYS LOVE THAT SHIT,
1345
00:56:10,767 --> 00:56:12,769
ESPECIALLY
IF THEY DON'T.
1346
00:56:12,802 --> 00:56:14,437
WHAT'S THE WORST THING
THAT CAN HAPPEN?
1347
00:56:14,471 --> 00:56:17,640
UM, HE HAS 10 FRIENDS, AND
THEY BEAT THE SHIT OUTTA ME.
1348
00:56:17,674 --> 00:56:18,975
UH, GOOD POINT.
1349
00:56:19,008 --> 00:56:20,744
THANK YOU.
1350
00:56:20,777 --> 00:56:21,778
SO WE DONE WITH THIS?
1351
00:56:21,811 --> 00:56:23,012
NO.
1352
00:56:23,046 --> 00:56:25,582
THE MacCARTHYS
ARE HERE FOR YOU,
1353
00:56:25,615 --> 00:56:26,883
SO GET OVER THERE.
1354
00:56:26,916 --> 00:56:28,518
GO.
1355
00:56:28,551 --> 00:56:30,053
GO!
1356
00:56:30,086 --> 00:56:32,889
[SIGHS]
1357
00:56:32,922 --> 00:56:34,424
I DON'T LIKE
THE MacCARTHYS.
1358
00:56:44,801 --> 00:56:47,103
♪ IF THAT YOU WOULD
LOOK MY WAY ♪
1359
00:56:47,137 --> 00:56:49,639
♪ THAT WOULD REALLY
MAKE MY DAY ♪
1360
00:56:49,672 --> 00:56:51,641
♪ 'CAUSE I'M TOO SHY
1361
00:56:51,674 --> 00:56:54,644
♪ YES, I'M TOO SHY
1362
00:56:54,677 --> 00:56:57,680
♪ SINCE I SAW YOU
SITTING THERE ♪
1363
00:56:57,714 --> 00:56:59,983
♪ CAN'T DO ANYTHING
BUT STARE ♪
1364
00:57:00,016 --> 00:57:01,117
♪ 'CAUSE I'M TOO SHY...
1365
00:57:01,151 --> 00:57:02,252
EXCUSE ME.
1366
00:57:02,285 --> 00:57:04,888
♪ YES, I'M TOO SHY
1367
00:57:04,921 --> 00:57:06,656
♪ SO I'VE GOT TO GET MY...
1368
00:57:06,689 --> 00:57:07,824
HE'S NOT INTERESTED.
1369
00:57:07,857 --> 00:57:09,025
YES, HE IS.
1370
00:57:09,058 --> 00:57:10,527
NO, I'M NOT GOING.
1371
00:57:10,560 --> 00:57:11,761
COME ON.
1372
00:57:11,795 --> 00:57:13,062
COME ON,
YOU'RE GONNA LOSE HIM.
1373
00:57:13,096 --> 00:57:16,599
♪ WHEN I'M STANDIN' THERE
1374
00:57:16,633 --> 00:57:19,803
♪ DO YOU, BABY...
1375
00:57:19,836 --> 00:57:21,538
WHERE'S HE GOING?
1376
00:57:21,571 --> 00:57:23,173
HE'S LEAVING.
ACCEPT IT. I HAVE.
1377
00:57:23,206 --> 00:57:24,841
NO, HURRY.
1378
00:57:26,843 --> 00:57:28,144
OH, GOOD CHRIST,
HE'S GOING INTO THE MEN'S ROOM.
1379
00:57:28,178 --> 00:57:29,612
PERFECT.
PERFECT.
1380
00:57:29,646 --> 00:57:31,548
GO.
PERFECT.
PERFECT?
1381
00:57:33,983 --> 00:57:35,585
WAIT A MINUTE.
1382
00:57:35,618 --> 00:57:37,220
YOU WANT ME TO GO INTO
A PUBLIC MEN'S ROOM
1383
00:57:37,253 --> 00:57:39,022
AND SAY TO A GUY
I'VE NEVER MET,
"DO YOU LIFT?"
1384
00:57:39,055 --> 00:57:40,757
OH, OK. HOW 'BOUT
NICE JACKET?
1385
00:57:40,790 --> 00:57:41,925
TAKE A PEEK
AT HIS PACKAGE.
1386
00:57:41,958 --> 00:57:43,293
HE'LL GET THE IDEA.
YEAH.
1387
00:57:43,326 --> 00:57:44,761
THEN WHAT, BLOW HIM
IN ONE OF THE STALLS?
1388
00:57:44,794 --> 00:57:46,062
YEAH,
THAT'S A START.
1389
00:57:46,095 --> 00:57:47,197
I HATE YOU.
1390
00:57:52,135 --> 00:57:53,937
NOW WHAT?
1391
00:57:53,970 --> 00:57:57,574
WAIT TILL HE FINISHES
AND, UM, GET HIM AT THE SINKS.
1392
00:58:12,188 --> 00:58:13,923
YOU, UH, PLAY CHESS?
1393
00:58:13,957 --> 00:58:15,892
I'M TOTALLY
ADDICTED, DUDE.
1394
00:58:15,925 --> 00:58:17,861
YEAH, ME, TOO.
1395
00:58:17,894 --> 00:58:21,231
ALTHOUGH I DON'T GET MUCH
OF A CHANCE TO PLAY THESE DAYS.
1396
00:58:21,264 --> 00:58:23,867
CAN'T FIND GOOD
COMPETITION.
1397
00:58:23,900 --> 00:58:26,102
OH, REALLY?
YOU'RE THAT GOOD?
1398
00:58:26,135 --> 00:58:28,037
OH, I DECIMATE
THE COMPUTER.
1399
00:58:28,071 --> 00:58:29,205
ME, TOO.
1400
00:58:29,239 --> 00:58:30,907
REALLY?
1401
00:58:30,940 --> 00:58:32,575
WELL, LISTEN, UH,
1402
00:58:32,609 --> 00:58:33,877
SOME FRIENDS AND I
ARE STAYING AT A CHALET,
1403
00:58:33,910 --> 00:58:35,979
AND THEY, UH, HAPPEN
TO HAVE A CHESSBOARD.
1404
00:58:36,012 --> 00:58:37,247
WHEREVER,
WHENEVER, DUDE.
1405
00:58:37,280 --> 00:58:38,681
DAVID.
1406
00:58:38,715 --> 00:58:39,849
MANNY.
1407
00:58:39,883 --> 00:58:41,084
GREAT.
1408
00:58:41,117 --> 00:58:43,286
WHAT ABOUT
YOUR FRIEND PEEIN'?
1409
00:58:43,319 --> 00:58:45,989
David: OH.
1410
00:58:57,367 --> 00:58:58,668
DAMN IT!
1411
00:58:58,701 --> 00:58:59,869
NICE DRIVIN',
FANCY BOY.
1412
00:58:59,903 --> 00:59:01,037
FUCK YOU, FELLA.
1413
00:59:01,070 --> 00:59:02,238
Ian: NO,
FUCK YOU, OK?
1414
00:59:02,272 --> 00:59:03,606
Jon: UH-HUH.
1415
00:59:03,640 --> 00:59:04,941
Ian: OH, GREAT.
1416
00:59:04,974 --> 00:59:06,109
IAN, YOU'RE NOT
LEAVING, ARE YOU?
1417
00:59:06,142 --> 00:59:07,343
WAIT.
1418
00:59:07,377 --> 00:59:08,711
Jon: IF THERE'S
ANY DAMAGE, MISTER--
1419
00:59:08,745 --> 00:59:11,014
Lisa: JANE,
CAREFUL OF THE BABY.
1420
00:59:11,047 --> 00:59:12,282
WHAT IS WITH
THESE PEOPLE? COME ON!
1421
00:59:12,315 --> 00:59:13,650
Jon: SOME GRATITUDE
YOU GOT THERE.
1422
00:59:13,683 --> 00:59:14,984
Jane: I'M NOT
GETTING OUT.
1423
00:59:16,085 --> 00:59:17,287
Keaton: JANE...
1424
00:59:17,320 --> 00:59:18,855
WAIT A SECOND!
1425
00:59:18,888 --> 00:59:24,227
BRITISH MATCHBOX COMPARED
TO MY GERMAN TECHNOLOGY.
1426
00:59:24,260 --> 00:59:26,095
Keaton: WHAT DID
YOU DO NOW, JON?
1427
00:59:32,735 --> 00:59:35,872
I'LL DROP YOU OFF
WHENEVER YOU WANT.
1428
00:59:37,240 --> 00:59:40,209
ALL RIGHT,
SUIT YOURSELF.
1429
00:59:44,113 --> 00:59:47,050
YOU JUST DON'T GET IT,
DO YOU, IAN?
1430
00:59:47,083 --> 00:59:49,118
WELL, MAYBE NO ONE'S
EXPLAINING IT RIGHT.
1431
00:59:49,152 --> 00:59:51,854
IT DOESN'T MATTER
HOW ANYONE EXPLAINS IT.
1432
00:59:51,888 --> 00:59:54,090
HIS COMING HERE
IS STILL A LOVING ACT.
1433
00:59:54,123 --> 00:59:55,959
WHY DON'T YOU GET THAT?
1434
00:59:55,992 --> 00:59:57,293
YOU DON'T KNOW
MY FATHER.
1435
00:59:58,928 --> 01:00:00,330
I DON'T KNOW YOUR DAD,
1436
01:00:00,363 --> 01:00:04,367
BUT I DO KNOW THAT
FATHERING A CHILD IS ONE THING
1437
01:00:04,400 --> 01:00:07,370
AND BEING
A FATHER,
THAT'S ANOTHER.
1438
01:00:09,005 --> 01:00:10,306
HE'S REACHING OUT TO YOU.
1439
01:00:10,340 --> 01:00:11,841
YOU DON'T KNOW
HOW LUCKY YOU ARE.
1440
01:00:11,874 --> 01:00:13,743
[SCOFFS] LUCKY?
1441
01:00:13,776 --> 01:00:15,745
[SCOFFS] OK.
1442
01:00:15,778 --> 01:00:17,013
I KNOW IT SEEMS
LIKE HE CARES,
1443
01:00:17,046 --> 01:00:19,349
BUT THE GUY
WAS NEVER THERE.
1444
01:00:19,382 --> 01:00:21,651
[CHUCKLES]
1445
01:00:22,852 --> 01:00:24,387
EVEN IF HE DOES MEAN IT,
1446
01:00:24,420 --> 01:00:26,923
WHAT DIFFERENCE DOES IT MAKE?
IT'S TOO LATE.
1447
01:00:26,956 --> 01:00:29,125
OH, WELL...
1448
01:00:29,158 --> 01:00:31,995
HOLD ON TO THAT.
THAT'S GOOD.
1449
01:00:32,028 --> 01:00:33,296
[LAUGHS]
1450
01:00:34,397 --> 01:00:35,732
WHAT DO YOU MEAN?
1451
01:00:35,765 --> 01:00:37,266
OH, 'CAUSE YOU'RE--
1452
01:00:37,300 --> 01:00:39,802
YOU'RE REALLY TEACHIN' HIM
A LESSON, AREN'T YA?
1453
01:00:42,438 --> 01:00:44,240
GOD, IAN,
YOU'RE FUCKIN' UP.
1454
01:00:44,273 --> 01:00:46,009
[SIGHS]
1455
01:00:46,042 --> 01:00:47,377
MY LIFE.
1456
01:00:47,410 --> 01:00:49,946
MY FUCKUP.
1457
01:00:51,214 --> 01:00:53,182
YEAH.
1458
01:00:57,220 --> 01:00:59,088
[TELEPHONE RINGING]
1459
01:01:00,289 --> 01:01:01,858
HELLO?
1460
01:01:01,891 --> 01:01:03,359
RICHARD, MY FLIGHT'S
BEEN DELAYED.
1461
01:01:03,393 --> 01:01:05,261
OH. OH.
1462
01:01:05,294 --> 01:01:08,164
OK, WELL, UH, LET ME KNOW
WHAT TIME YOU'RE COMING,
1463
01:01:08,197 --> 01:01:10,166
AND I'LL COME
AND PICK YOU UP.
1464
01:01:10,199 --> 01:01:11,801
NO, NO, NO. HONEY,
I THINK I'M JUST
GONNA RENT A CAR.
1465
01:01:11,834 --> 01:01:13,036
THERE'S NO TELLING
WHAT TIME I'D GET IN
1466
01:01:13,069 --> 01:01:14,904
UNTIL THIS DAMN
PLANE TAKES OFF.
1467
01:01:14,937 --> 01:01:17,173
ARE YOU OK?
YOU SOUND,
I DON'T KNOW--
1468
01:01:17,206 --> 01:01:20,243
NO, IT'S--
IT'S NOTHING. I'M JUST...
1469
01:01:20,276 --> 01:01:22,311
TRYING TO KEEP UP
WITH THE KIDS.
1470
01:01:22,345 --> 01:01:25,014
YOU TOLD HIM.
HE TOOK IT BADLY.
1471
01:01:25,048 --> 01:01:26,282
[SIGHS]
1472
01:01:27,483 --> 01:01:29,485
HE'S SO ANGRY.
1473
01:01:31,220 --> 01:01:34,724
HE'S VERY,
VERY, VERY ANGRY.
1474
01:01:36,325 --> 01:01:38,361
GOD, HE HATES
THE WHOLE IDEA?
1475
01:01:38,394 --> 01:01:41,097
NO, NO. I-- I DIDN'T--
I DIDN'T TELL HIM.
1476
01:01:44,267 --> 01:01:47,103
RICHARD, YOU HAD BETTER
TELL HIM BEFORE I GET THERE.
1477
01:01:47,136 --> 01:01:48,771
PLEASE, HONEY,
YOU PROMISED.
1478
01:01:48,805 --> 01:01:51,074
I JUST DON'T WANT US
TO AMBUSH HIM, OK?
1479
01:01:51,107 --> 01:01:52,775
OK?
1480
01:01:52,809 --> 01:01:54,043
[SIGHS]
1481
01:01:54,077 --> 01:01:55,411
I'LL TELL HIM
WHEN HE GETS BACK.
1482
01:01:55,445 --> 01:01:57,413
OK, PLEASE.
1483
01:01:57,447 --> 01:01:59,215
AND I LOVE YOU.
1484
01:01:59,248 --> 01:02:01,084
[KISS]
1485
01:02:01,117 --> 01:02:04,087
Jon: SLOWLY, KEATON!
1486
01:02:04,120 --> 01:02:05,254
David: YEP. WHOA.
1487
01:02:05,288 --> 01:02:06,456
Manny: GREAT.
1488
01:02:06,489 --> 01:02:08,024
David: WHOA.
1489
01:02:11,394 --> 01:02:15,231
HEY. WE NEED TO TALK.
1490
01:02:15,264 --> 01:02:16,299
OK.
1491
01:02:16,332 --> 01:02:17,967
LET'S TALK.
1492
01:02:18,000 --> 01:02:19,402
ALONE? YEAH.
1493
01:02:19,435 --> 01:02:20,937
OK.
1494
01:02:25,541 --> 01:02:27,543
David: SEE YA LATER
AT THE HOUSE!
1495
01:02:32,215 --> 01:02:35,384
I NEED TO TELL YOU
SOMETHING...
1496
01:02:35,418 --> 01:02:39,355
SOMETHING I'VE NEVER
TOLD ANYONE.
1497
01:02:39,388 --> 01:02:41,924
GO ON.
1498
01:02:41,958 --> 01:02:44,861
I HAD THIS PARAKEET
NAMED GERTIE.
1499
01:02:44,894 --> 01:02:46,429
WHAT COLOR?
1500
01:02:46,462 --> 01:02:47,530
BLUE. WHY?
1501
01:02:47,563 --> 01:02:49,332
JUST CHECKING.
1502
01:02:49,365 --> 01:02:51,367
DID YOU REALLY
HAVE A PARAKEET?
1503
01:02:51,400 --> 01:02:54,537
KEATON, I'M TRYING
TO TRUST YOU WITH SOMETHING
1504
01:02:54,570 --> 01:02:56,072
THAT MEANS A LOT TO ME.
1505
01:02:56,105 --> 01:02:58,274
DO YOU WANNA
HEAR THIS OR NOT?
1506
01:02:58,307 --> 01:02:59,942
I DO.
I DO. I'M SORRY.
1507
01:03:02,178 --> 01:03:04,580
OK.
ANYWAY,
1508
01:03:04,614 --> 01:03:07,350
I HAD
THIS
BLUE
PARAKEET...
1509
01:03:07,383 --> 01:03:10,386
[LAUGHS]
NAMED GERTIE,
1510
01:03:10,419 --> 01:03:15,958
AND MY DAD TOLD ME
THAT CAGED BIRDS CAN'T FLY.
1511
01:03:15,992 --> 01:03:18,995
I MEAN, HE SAID EVEN IF YOU
LEAVE THE CAGE DOOR OPEN,
1512
01:03:19,028 --> 01:03:21,497
THEY WON'T FLY AWAY.
1513
01:03:21,531 --> 01:03:23,399
THEY'LL JUST--
1514
01:03:23,432 --> 01:03:26,235
JUST STAY THERE
IN THE SAFETY OF THEIR CAGE.
1515
01:03:28,237 --> 01:03:30,006
DO YOU UNDERSTAND?
1516
01:03:30,039 --> 01:03:32,241
YEAH.
1517
01:03:33,676 --> 01:03:36,579
I LOVED GERTIE.
1518
01:03:36,612 --> 01:03:38,881
BUT YOU LOVED
YOUR FATHER MORE.
1519
01:03:38,915 --> 01:03:41,918
WHAT'S THAT
SUPPOSED TO MEAN?
1520
01:03:41,951 --> 01:03:43,920
YOU OPENED THE DOOR.
1521
01:03:43,953 --> 01:03:47,190
OH, GOD, KEATON,
IT WAS SO AWFUL.
1522
01:03:47,223 --> 01:03:48,391
AND?
1523
01:03:48,424 --> 01:03:49,659
AND WHAT?
1524
01:03:49,692 --> 01:03:51,194
AND YOU OPENED
THE DOOR AND--
1525
01:03:51,227 --> 01:03:54,263
AND SHE FLEW OUT THE WINDOW
AND DOWN THE STREET
1526
01:03:54,297 --> 01:03:56,566
AND RIGHT INTO
THE WINDSHIELD OF A BUS.
1527
01:03:56,599 --> 01:03:58,634
I MEAN, IT HAPPENED,
LIKE, 2 SECONDS--
1528
01:03:58,668 --> 01:03:59,936
IT WAS AWFUL.
1529
01:03:59,969 --> 01:04:01,103
[LAUGHS]
1530
01:04:01,137 --> 01:04:03,172
[SCOFFS]
YOU LAUGH?
1531
01:04:03,206 --> 01:04:06,008
YOU KNOW,
MY FATHER LAUGHED.
1532
01:04:06,042 --> 01:04:08,945
OH, COME ON, LISA.
WHAT DID YOU EXPECT?
1533
01:04:08,978 --> 01:04:11,881
I WANTED HER TO GO FREE.
1534
01:04:14,217 --> 01:04:16,252
NO, NO, NO. THAT'S--
1535
01:04:16,285 --> 01:04:17,320
THAT'S
WHAT YOU WANTED.
1536
01:04:17,353 --> 01:04:19,455
WHAT'D YOU EXPECT?
1537
01:04:22,158 --> 01:04:24,227
I EXPECTED HER
TO STAY IN THE CAGE
1538
01:04:24,260 --> 01:04:26,062
LIKE A GOOD BIRD,
1539
01:04:26,095 --> 01:04:28,364
LIKE HE
TOLD ME
SHE WOULD.
1540
01:04:33,603 --> 01:04:36,472
I'LL-- I'LL JUST ASSUME
THAT WHATEVER IT WAS
1541
01:04:36,505 --> 01:04:38,307
THAT YOU WANTED TO TELL
ME OUT HERE IN PRIVATE
1542
01:04:38,341 --> 01:04:41,978
WAS IN THAT STORY
SOMEWHERE.
1543
01:04:42,011 --> 01:04:44,013
[SIGHS]
1544
01:04:45,147 --> 01:04:48,050
OH, FUCK IT.
1545
01:04:58,694 --> 01:05:00,496
Jane: THANK YOU.
1546
01:05:00,529 --> 01:05:01,697
FOR WHAT?
1547
01:05:01,731 --> 01:05:04,367
UGH. I WAS SO HUNGRY.
1548
01:05:06,302 --> 01:05:07,336
MY PLEASURE.
1549
01:05:07,370 --> 01:05:09,538
[LAUGHS]
1550
01:05:13,409 --> 01:05:15,745
I WANNA THANK YOU.
1551
01:05:15,778 --> 01:05:17,380
FOR WHAT?
1552
01:05:19,448 --> 01:05:22,985
WELL, FOR EVERYTHING,
REALLY.
1553
01:05:32,728 --> 01:05:34,430
WHOA, WOW.
1554
01:05:34,463 --> 01:05:38,000
WELL, UH, THIS IS--
THIS IS WEIRD.
1555
01:05:38,034 --> 01:05:39,235
AHEM.
1556
01:05:39,268 --> 01:05:41,037
THAT'S NOT RIGHT.
YOU'RE MY--
1557
01:05:41,070 --> 01:05:42,271
YOU'RE
MY BEST FRIEND'S
LITTLE SISTER.
1558
01:05:42,305 --> 01:05:43,606
IT'S NOT-- THAT'S--
1559
01:05:43,639 --> 01:05:45,508
IT'S TOO WEIRD.
IT'S NOT RIGHT.
1560
01:05:49,245 --> 01:05:53,015
MO-- MO-- MO-- MO--
1561
01:05:53,049 --> 01:05:54,450
TEL?
1562
01:05:54,483 --> 01:05:56,218
MOTEL?
MM-HMM.
1563
01:05:56,252 --> 01:05:57,486
MOTEL.
SOUNDS GOOD.
1564
01:05:57,520 --> 01:05:59,388
MOTEL.
1565
01:06:04,593 --> 01:06:05,795
NO VACANCIES.
1566
01:06:05,828 --> 01:06:08,164
YOU KNOW, IT'S
CHRISTMAS EVE.
1567
01:06:08,197 --> 01:06:10,066
NO ROOM
AT THE INN.
1568
01:06:10,099 --> 01:06:13,369
UM...IS THERE
ANYPLACE ELSE AROUND HERE?
1569
01:06:13,402 --> 01:06:15,371
I COULD CHECK.
1570
01:06:15,404 --> 01:06:17,773
GREAT.
1571
01:06:17,807 --> 01:06:20,109
YOU KNOW I'VE GOT
EVERY HOTEL AND MOTEL
1572
01:06:20,142 --> 01:06:22,578
IN THE WHOLE COUNTRY
RIGHT HERE IN THIS
COMPUTER.
1573
01:06:22,611 --> 01:06:23,713
RIGHT ON.
1574
01:06:23,746 --> 01:06:25,581
UM, WHICH WAY
YOU HEADED?
1575
01:06:25,614 --> 01:06:27,350
EAST.
1576
01:06:27,383 --> 01:06:29,652
EAST.
1577
01:06:33,756 --> 01:06:35,257
[COMPUTER BEEPS]
1578
01:06:35,291 --> 01:06:38,728
NOTHING.
NOTHING BETWEEN
HERE AND THE COAST.
1579
01:06:38,761 --> 01:06:40,062
SHIT.
1580
01:06:50,106 --> 01:06:53,809
[MOANING]
1581
01:06:53,843 --> 01:06:56,112
WHO'S THAT?
1582
01:06:56,145 --> 01:06:57,413
[DOORBELL RINGS]
1583
01:06:57,446 --> 01:07:00,082
AND THAT WILL BE...IAN.
1584
01:07:00,116 --> 01:07:01,217
OH.
1585
01:07:01,250 --> 01:07:02,418
IS-- IS IAN
WITH YOU?
1586
01:07:02,451 --> 01:07:03,753
IT'S THAT FUCKIN' GUY!
1587
01:07:03,786 --> 01:07:05,521
COME ON IN.
YOU MUST BE FREEZING.
1588
01:07:05,554 --> 01:07:06,722
YES, COLD US.
1589
01:07:06,756 --> 01:07:08,124
YES, HELLO.
1590
01:07:08,157 --> 01:07:09,425
WE BROUGHT
THE MISTLETOE.
1591
01:07:09,458 --> 01:07:10,860
WHO'S NEXT?
1592
01:07:10,893 --> 01:07:12,828
I CAN'T TAKE THIS ANYMORE.
I'VE HAD IT.
1593
01:07:12,862 --> 01:07:14,864
OK, THE CHAMPAGNE
IS THIS WAY.
1594
01:07:14,897 --> 01:07:17,833
OH, HO, HO, DEAR.
COME ON.
1595
01:07:25,207 --> 01:07:26,509
WOULD YOU LIKE
SOME CHAMPAGNE?
1596
01:07:26,542 --> 01:07:27,676
OH, THANK YOU.
1597
01:07:27,710 --> 01:07:29,211
GOOD.
YOU'RE WELCOME.
1598
01:07:29,245 --> 01:07:30,646
Hans: I PLAY PIANO
JUST A LITTLE BIT,
1599
01:07:30,679 --> 01:07:32,281
BUT I'M SINGULARLY
INSIDE MY SPIRIT GUIDES,
1600
01:07:32,314 --> 01:07:34,216
WHICH ARE COMING
INTO MY BODY RIGHT NOW.
1601
01:07:34,250 --> 01:07:35,584
THEY'RE SAYING
THERE'S A SONG.
1602
01:07:35,618 --> 01:07:36,752
UH-HUH.
1603
01:07:36,786 --> 01:07:38,454
LET ME CHECK.
1604
01:07:38,487 --> 01:07:40,589
YES, A SONG IS HERE,
AND IT'S CALLED
CARLA.
1605
01:07:40,623 --> 01:07:43,759
[PLAYING PIANO]
1606
01:07:55,905 --> 01:07:57,873
Hans: ♪ A BOY LIKE ME...
1607
01:07:57,907 --> 01:07:59,475
ARE YOU ALL RIGHT?
1608
01:07:59,508 --> 01:08:02,611
I'M BEGINNING TO THINK
IT'S NOT THE WOMEN.
1609
01:08:02,645 --> 01:08:05,281
THAT'S IMPOSSIBLE.
WHO IF NOT THEM?
1610
01:08:05,314 --> 01:08:08,551
♪ MY GUN'S FOR HIRE,
MY HORSE ENJOYS A RIDE ♪
1611
01:08:11,220 --> 01:08:12,688
ME.
1612
01:08:12,721 --> 01:08:14,924
♪ SEEK MY VOTE
1613
01:08:14,957 --> 01:08:19,495
♪ SLEAZY DOWNTOWN GIRL
1614
01:08:19,528 --> 01:08:21,330
♪ THIS FRAULEIN
CARLA'S ♪
1615
01:08:21,363 --> 01:08:25,668
♪ GOT MY HEAD IN A WHIRL,
MY HEART IN A WHIRL, TOO ♪
1616
01:08:25,701 --> 01:08:27,870
♪ MY UNIVERSE
IN A WHIRL NOW ♪
1617
01:08:27,903 --> 01:08:32,241
♪ I KNOW I GOTTA
HEAR HER IN EVERYTHING... ♪
1618
01:08:42,451 --> 01:08:43,786
[STOPS PLAYING]
1619
01:08:43,819 --> 01:08:45,721
OH, THANK YOU.
THAT WAS WONDERFUL.
1620
01:08:45,754 --> 01:08:47,223
YES, BUT NOW
THE SONG'S OVER,
THE LIBIDO'S UP,
1621
01:08:47,256 --> 01:08:49,258
SO COME ON. MAY I
STEAL YOU AWAY?
1622
01:08:49,291 --> 01:08:50,559
OK.
1623
01:08:50,593 --> 01:08:51,760
GRAB THE CHAMPAGNE.
1624
01:08:51,794 --> 01:08:53,395
OH, THANKS.
1625
01:09:06,308 --> 01:09:07,510
THANKS.
1626
01:09:11,547 --> 01:09:14,283
SO...ARE YOU GUYS,
YOU KNOW--
1627
01:09:16,819 --> 01:09:18,754
I DON'T KNOW.
I HAVEN'T ASKED HIM YET.
1628
01:09:18,787 --> 01:09:21,891
WHAT DO YOU MEAN
YOU HAVEN'T
ASKED HIM YET?
1629
01:09:21,924 --> 01:09:23,492
[CHUCKLES]
1630
01:09:25,427 --> 01:09:29,431
ASK HIM TO HANG
THE MISTLETOE WITH YOU.
1631
01:09:29,465 --> 01:09:31,800
HMM? THE REST
IS AUTOMATIC.
1632
01:09:37,973 --> 01:09:39,608
MANNY, YOU WANNA
GO OUTSIDE
1633
01:09:39,642 --> 01:09:41,277
AND HELP ME
HANG THE MISTLETOE?
1634
01:09:41,310 --> 01:09:42,878
SEEIN' AS YOU'RE
TALL AND EVERYTHING.
1635
01:09:42,912 --> 01:09:44,647
SURE.
1636
01:09:45,748 --> 01:09:47,483
WHERE ARE YOU GOING?
1637
01:09:47,516 --> 01:09:48,784
I AM GOING UPSTAIRS
1638
01:09:48,817 --> 01:09:50,553
TO TELL THAT EVIL
TWO-TIMING VIXEN
1639
01:09:50,586 --> 01:09:53,923
AND HER SKI INSTRUCTOR
HANS BOYFRIEND
1640
01:09:53,956 --> 01:09:56,358
THAT I GOT FIRSTS.
1641
01:10:09,638 --> 01:10:11,540
BE CAREFUL, DUDE.
1642
01:10:17,046 --> 01:10:19,381
I GOT IT.
1643
01:10:21,483 --> 01:10:23,586
YEAH, THAT'S COOL.
1644
01:10:23,619 --> 01:10:24,787
THERE.
1645
01:10:24,820 --> 01:10:26,922
YEP, THERE IT IS.
1646
01:10:29,758 --> 01:10:31,794
ARE YOU
A SINGLE GAY MAN?
1647
01:10:31,827 --> 01:10:34,430
NO, I'M NOT.
1648
01:10:35,831 --> 01:10:37,266
I'M SORRY.
1649
01:10:39,702 --> 01:10:41,303
SORRY?
1650
01:10:41,337 --> 01:10:43,072
WHAT, THAT'S IT?
1651
01:10:43,105 --> 01:10:44,540
I'M SUPPOSED
TO JUST SPLIT NOW?
1652
01:10:44,573 --> 01:10:49,645
NO, I JUST KINDA
FIGURED YOU'D WANT TO.
1653
01:10:49,678 --> 01:10:51,747
WELL, YOU FIGURED WRONG.
1654
01:10:51,780 --> 01:10:53,382
OK.
1655
01:10:53,415 --> 01:10:55,351
LET'S GO PLAY
SOME CHESS. COME ON.
1656
01:10:56,785 --> 01:10:58,587
YOU KNOW,
TO TELL YOU THE TRUTH,
1657
01:10:58,621 --> 01:11:00,456
I DON'T KNOW
WHAT I WOULD'VE DONE
IF YOU HAD SAID YES.
1658
01:11:00,489 --> 01:11:02,891
[LAUGHS] YEAH, WELL,
NEITHER DO I.
1659
01:11:02,925 --> 01:11:05,561
SO I WAS--
I CAUGHT AN EDGE,
AND I FELL DOWN,
1660
01:11:05,594 --> 01:11:07,896
AND THIS GUY HELPED ME,
SO I THOUGHT--
1661
01:11:07,930 --> 01:11:09,898
David:
WE'RE FRIENDS.
1662
01:11:09,932 --> 01:11:11,400
IS EVERYBODY
ALL RIGHT WITH THAT?
1663
01:11:11,433 --> 01:11:12,735
GREAT!
GREAT!
1664
01:11:12,768 --> 01:11:15,371
SO I GOT UP,
AND HE GAVE ME BACK
MY POLES.
1665
01:11:17,072 --> 01:11:19,408
I'M COLD.
1666
01:11:19,441 --> 01:11:20,909
HE KICKED ME.
1667
01:11:20,943 --> 01:11:22,111
[LAUGHS]
SHE.
1668
01:11:22,144 --> 01:11:23,712
SHE.
1669
01:11:27,449 --> 01:11:31,020
I REMEMBER WHEN I FIRST
FELL IN LOVE WITH YOU.
1670
01:11:32,955 --> 01:11:35,724
I HAD
NO IDEA WHAT TO SAY.
1671
01:11:35,758 --> 01:11:39,762
I SPENT 2 HOURS
TRYING TO COME UP
WITH AN OPENING LINE
1672
01:11:39,795 --> 01:11:43,599
WITH ONE OF MY BUSBOYS
TITO MORALES.
1673
01:11:43,632 --> 01:11:44,833
NEXT THING I KNEW,
1674
01:11:44,867 --> 01:11:46,502
HE WAS USING
MY LINE ON YOU,
1675
01:11:46,535 --> 01:11:48,037
AND I SPENT THE SUMMER
BUSSING HIS TABLES.
1676
01:11:48,070 --> 01:11:49,972
DOES THAT
SOUND FAMILIAR?
1677
01:11:50,005 --> 01:11:51,807
YEAH. HE WAS CUTE.
1678
01:11:51,840 --> 01:11:54,476
[LAUGHS]
1679
01:11:59,748 --> 01:12:00,983
OW.
1680
01:12:01,016 --> 01:12:02,418
SORRY. SORRY.
1681
01:12:02,451 --> 01:12:03,752
I'M SORRY.
AH, LOOK AT ME.
1682
01:12:03,786 --> 01:12:05,421
I CAN'T DO IT
IN A CAR,
1683
01:12:05,454 --> 01:12:07,089
AND I DON'T WANT TO.
1684
01:12:07,122 --> 01:12:09,858
THIS IS OUR FIRST TIME.
I WANT IT TO BE SPECIAL.
1685
01:12:09,892 --> 01:12:11,560
IT SHOULD BE SPECIAL.
YEAH.
1686
01:12:11,593 --> 01:12:12,961
I'LL MAKE IT SPECIAL.
IT'LL BE SPECIAL.
1687
01:12:12,995 --> 01:12:15,597
OH, IAN--
IAN, I'M SERIOUS.
1688
01:12:15,631 --> 01:12:16,765
WHAT?
1689
01:12:16,799 --> 01:12:17,766
COME ON.
1690
01:12:17,800 --> 01:12:20,969
LET'S GO BACK.
1691
01:12:21,003 --> 01:12:23,572
BACK THERE?
YOU GOTTA BE CRAZY.
NO WAY.
1692
01:12:23,605 --> 01:12:24,740
COME ON, IAN.
1693
01:12:24,773 --> 01:12:27,876
IT'S 375 HOURS
TO YOUR HOUSE,
1694
01:12:27,910 --> 01:12:30,179
AND YOUR DAD'S PLACE
IS JUST AROUND THE CORNER.
1695
01:12:30,212 --> 01:12:31,814
NO.
1696
01:12:31,847 --> 01:12:33,849
IT'S FINAL.
1697
01:12:33,882 --> 01:12:35,517
OH, COME ON.
1698
01:12:36,618 --> 01:12:38,520
[SIGHS]
1699
01:12:42,825 --> 01:12:44,493
KISS?
1700
01:12:46,762 --> 01:12:48,664
CANDY STORE'S CLOSED.
1701
01:12:50,632 --> 01:12:52,634
[SIGHS]
1702
01:12:56,038 --> 01:12:57,973
SHIT.
1703
01:13:08,083 --> 01:13:12,488
[SHARP EXHALE]
1704
01:13:26,068 --> 01:13:27,903
OH, COME ON.
1705
01:13:29,071 --> 01:13:31,540
JON, THIS IS NOT
A GOOD THING.
1706
01:13:31,573 --> 01:13:33,008
SHH.
1707
01:13:33,041 --> 01:13:35,878
[WHISPERING]
Or I can't hear anything.
1708
01:13:42,017 --> 01:13:46,054
JON, THERE'S A WHOLE
BIG, BRIGHT, BEAUTIFUL
WORLD OUT THERE
1709
01:13:46,088 --> 01:13:49,491
BEYOND
THE 5 INCHES
OF YOUR PENIS.
1710
01:13:49,525 --> 01:13:51,026
[WHISPERING] Fuck you.
1711
01:13:51,059 --> 01:13:52,528
[WHISPERING]
Fuck you.
Fuck you.
1712
01:13:52,561 --> 01:13:53,695
PSSST!
1713
01:13:54,830 --> 01:13:56,532
FUCK ME.
1714
01:13:56,565 --> 01:13:59,001
[WHISPERING]
Keaton! Keaton!
1715
01:14:06,608 --> 01:14:10,078
KEATON, LISA,
OPEN THIS DOOR!
1716
01:14:11,580 --> 01:14:14,783
Jon: OPEN THIS DOOR,
DAMN IT!
1717
01:14:19,955 --> 01:14:24,126
COME ON, GUYS, OPEN UP!
WE NEED TO TALK ABOUT THIS!
1718
01:14:24,159 --> 01:14:26,295
JON, THIS IS NOT
A GOOD TIME!
1719
01:14:26,328 --> 01:14:27,896
OH!
1720
01:14:27,930 --> 01:14:29,965
[GIGGLES]
1721
01:14:29,998 --> 01:14:31,834
Jon: KEATON, LISA,
OPEN THIS DOOR.
1722
01:14:31,867 --> 01:14:32,968
[KNOCKS AT DOOR]
1723
01:14:33,001 --> 01:14:34,770
JON, PISS OFF!
1724
01:14:34,803 --> 01:14:36,905
YOU'RE MAKING
A TERRIBLE MISTAKE!
1725
01:14:36,939 --> 01:14:39,708
OH, GOD, KEATON,
SQUEEZE 'EM HARDER.
1726
01:14:39,741 --> 01:14:41,243
[SCREAMS]
1727
01:14:41,276 --> 01:14:42,578
[LAUGHS] YEAH.
1728
01:14:42,611 --> 01:14:44,146
YEAH, OW!
1729
01:14:44,179 --> 01:14:45,848
[GRUNTS]
1730
01:14:50,619 --> 01:14:52,688
[SIGHS]
1731
01:15:17,079 --> 01:15:19,982
[DEEP BREATHING]
1732
01:15:26,788 --> 01:15:29,691
CAN I JOIN YOU GUYS?
1733
01:15:29,725 --> 01:15:31,860
HANS IS TEACHING ME
HOW TO MEDITATE.
1734
01:15:31,894 --> 01:15:33,195
THAT'S CORRECT, JON.
1735
01:15:33,228 --> 01:15:35,898
I BELIEVE THE WORD
IS "PENETRATE," CARLA.
1736
01:15:35,931 --> 01:15:37,165
OH.
1737
01:15:37,199 --> 01:15:40,235
NO, JON, AND IN ORDER
FOR THE PENE--
1738
01:15:40,269 --> 01:15:41,803
MEDITATION TO WORK,
1739
01:15:41,837 --> 01:15:44,773
I MUST-- IF YOU LEAVE,
PERHAPS WE FIND GOD.
1740
01:15:46,875 --> 01:15:49,778
COME ON, CARLA, YOU'RE NOT
REALLY GOING FOR THIS CRAP.
1741
01:15:49,811 --> 01:15:52,681
THIS IS THE STUPIDEST
COME-ON I HAVE EVER SEEN,
1742
01:15:52,714 --> 01:15:54,049
AND I AM THE KING OF STUPID.
1743
01:15:54,082 --> 01:15:55,317
YEAH, YOU CAN
SAY THAT AGAIN.
1744
01:15:55,350 --> 01:15:56,685
YES, YOU CAN, JON,
1745
01:15:56,718 --> 01:16:00,088
BECAUSE
YOU ARE INTERRUPTING!
1746
01:16:00,122 --> 01:16:03,091
FORGET ABOUT HIM.
YOU JUST RELAX.
1747
01:16:03,125 --> 01:16:06,094
KEEP THE EYES CLOSED.
THE WHITE LIGHT IS ATOP.
1748
01:16:06,128 --> 01:16:08,864
VISUALIZE
THE LIGHT COME DOWN
THE TOP OF THE HEAD.
1749
01:16:08,897 --> 01:16:12,768
I WILL DEAL
WITH THE PROBLEM
CALLED JON!
1750
01:16:12,801 --> 01:16:14,736
[DEEP EXHALES]
1751
01:16:16,104 --> 01:16:18,840
I CAN'T FIND
THE WHITE LIGHT.
1752
01:16:18,874 --> 01:16:20,642
IT'S
TOO DARK IN HERE.
1753
01:16:20,676 --> 01:16:21,977
JON, JON,
IF YOU PLEASE.
1754
01:16:22,010 --> 01:16:24,313
EVERYTHING I DO WITH CARLA
IS ON YOUR BEHALF.
1755
01:16:24,346 --> 01:16:26,281
I CLEANSE THE CHAKRAS,
I START WITH THE HEART,
1756
01:16:26,315 --> 01:16:28,383
I GO TO THE PLEXUS,
I DEAL WITH THE SPLEEN,
1757
01:16:28,417 --> 01:16:30,052
I ARRIVE AT THE ROOT,
1758
01:16:30,085 --> 01:16:32,654
AND THEN
SHE IS ALL YOURS.
1759
01:16:37,159 --> 01:16:38,694
[SIGHS]
1760
01:16:38,727 --> 01:16:41,330
THIS GUY IS OFFERING
ME SLOPPY SECONDS.
1761
01:16:41,363 --> 01:16:44,199
CAN'T BELIEVE THAT
HE'S OFFERING ME
SLOPPY SECONDS.
1762
01:16:46,001 --> 01:16:48,236
AH, I COULD
LIVE WITH THAT.
1763
01:16:55,377 --> 01:16:57,012
GENTLEMEN...
1764
01:16:57,045 --> 01:16:59,214
WE'RE OUTTA HERE.
1765
01:16:59,247 --> 01:17:01,116
WHERE WE GOIN'?
1766
01:17:01,149 --> 01:17:04,152
THERE'S A WHOLE BIG, BRIGHT,
BEAUTIFUL WORLD OUT THERE
1767
01:17:04,186 --> 01:17:06,755
BEYOND THE 7 INCHES
OF MY PENIS,
1768
01:17:06,788 --> 01:17:08,957
AND I INTEND
TO EXPLORE IT.
1769
01:17:08,991 --> 01:17:10,292
David: REALLY?
1770
01:17:10,325 --> 01:17:11,960
REALLY.
1771
01:17:15,931 --> 01:17:18,266
[CAR STEREO BLARING]
1772
01:17:24,306 --> 01:17:26,875
JON, PLEASE,
JUST STOP.
1773
01:17:26,908 --> 01:17:29,244
NO, JUST ONE MORE TRY.
1774
01:17:29,277 --> 01:17:31,747
UH, EXCUSE ME, MISS?
YES?
1775
01:17:31,780 --> 01:17:33,181
HI.
HI.
1776
01:17:33,215 --> 01:17:35,250
YOU EVER THOUGHT
ABOUT DOING
SOME MODELING?
1777
01:17:35,283 --> 01:17:37,252
[LAUGHS]
YOU'RE KIDDING, RIGHT?
1778
01:17:37,285 --> 01:17:39,021
NO, NO, NO.
I'M VERY SERIOUS.
1779
01:17:39,054 --> 01:17:40,155
I'M A PHOTOGRAPHER,
AND I THOUGHT PERHAPS
1780
01:17:40,188 --> 01:17:41,390
WE COULD GET
TOGETHER AND...
1781
01:17:41,423 --> 01:17:43,058
SHOOT SOME PHOTOS.
1782
01:17:43,091 --> 01:17:46,161
MM. WELL, MY RATE
IS $2,000 A DAY.
1783
01:17:46,194 --> 01:17:48,030
[LAUGHS]
1784
01:17:48,063 --> 01:17:49,498
YOU CAN
REACH ME AT
CHIC.
1785
01:17:49,531 --> 01:17:51,266
[WHISPERING]
Ask for Sasha.
1786
01:17:53,468 --> 01:17:55,270
Sasha:
HEY, BABY.
1787
01:17:56,972 --> 01:17:59,441
OH, WELL, I TRIED.
1788
01:17:59,474 --> 01:18:01,109
NOW WHAT?
1789
01:18:01,143 --> 01:18:02,944
TRY AGAIN.
1790
01:18:02,978 --> 01:18:04,746
JUST NOT TONIGHT.
1791
01:18:04,780 --> 01:18:06,481
LET'S GO.
1792
01:18:08,216 --> 01:18:10,118
AHH, SO UNFORTUNATE.
1793
01:18:10,152 --> 01:18:13,088
MY DEAR, WHAT DOES
THESE PEOPLE DO TO YOU
ALL YOUR LIFE?
1794
01:18:13,121 --> 01:18:16,825
OH, SWEETHEART, I WANT
IT OUT OF YOU AT THIS POINT.
1795
01:18:16,858 --> 01:18:20,829
OUT OF HERE,
OH, SO BAD.
1796
01:18:20,862 --> 01:18:22,397
I DON'T KNOW
WHAT TO DO.
1797
01:18:22,431 --> 01:18:25,133
OH, IT'S TERRIBLE.
WE MUST CLEAN YOU.
1798
01:18:25,167 --> 01:18:27,135
I MUST CLEAN YOU, CARLA.
1799
01:18:27,169 --> 01:18:30,138
I'M GOING
TO CLEAN YOU, CARLA.
1800
01:18:30,172 --> 01:18:35,444
OK, SEE, ALL THE ARTICLES
OF CLOTHING ARE RESTRICTING
THE FLOW OF THE ENERGY.
1801
01:18:35,477 --> 01:18:37,212
I MUST--YES,
IN FACT, YEAH,
1802
01:18:37,245 --> 01:18:40,782
THERE IS ANOTHER
ARTICLE ALSO. WATCH THIS.
1803
01:18:40,816 --> 01:18:42,517
[EXHALES]
1804
01:18:42,551 --> 01:18:44,319
YOU MUST BELIEVE.
1805
01:18:44,352 --> 01:18:47,022
YES, INTUITIVELY,
YOU KNOW THIS IS VERY GOOD.
1806
01:18:47,055 --> 01:18:48,990
OH, YES, WE ARE
WORKING TOGETHER NOW.
1807
01:18:49,024 --> 01:18:50,258
THIS IS A
GROUP EFFORT,
JA?
1808
01:18:50,292 --> 01:18:51,460
OH, MY GOD.
1809
01:18:51,493 --> 01:18:52,861
I BELIEVE YOU.
1810
01:18:52,894 --> 01:18:54,896
YES, THIS IS NOTHING
NOT TO BELIEVE.
1811
01:18:54,930 --> 01:18:58,366
LET ME CHECK.
ALL RIGHT, NOW I AM FREE.
1812
01:18:58,400 --> 01:18:59,835
YES, IT'S OBVIOUS
YEAH?
1813
01:18:59,868 --> 01:19:02,437
ALL OF MY SPIRIT
GUIDES HAVE TOLD ME
1814
01:19:02,471 --> 01:19:04,873
THAT I AM
NOW FREE TO WORK.
1815
01:19:04,906 --> 01:19:06,408
LET ME CHECK.
1816
01:19:09,277 --> 01:19:11,213
YEAH, I NEED
TO TAKE A SECOND.
1817
01:19:14,449 --> 01:19:15,851
ALL RIGHT,
I HAVE TO ADMIT
1818
01:19:15,884 --> 01:19:18,420
THIS PLACE
IS PRETTY BEAUTIFUL.
1819
01:19:18,453 --> 01:19:21,790
YEAH, IT SURE IS.
1820
01:19:23,091 --> 01:19:25,327
I EVER TELL YA
YOU HAVE BEAUTIFUL EYES?
1821
01:19:25,360 --> 01:19:27,295
WELL, YOU CAN
TELL ME AGAIN.
1822
01:19:27,329 --> 01:19:28,530
ALL RIGHT,
YOU HAVE BEAUTIFUL EYES.
1823
01:19:28,563 --> 01:19:29,931
THANK YOU.
1824
01:19:29,965 --> 01:19:32,000
AND A BEAUTIFUL NOSE
1825
01:19:32,033 --> 01:19:34,336
AND LIPS...
1826
01:19:34,369 --> 01:19:37,005
AND TEETH...
1827
01:19:37,038 --> 01:19:38,807
AND JAW...
1828
01:19:40,575 --> 01:19:42,477
AND EARS.
1829
01:19:59,928 --> 01:20:01,496
OH. OW! NOT HERE.
1830
01:20:04,132 --> 01:20:05,267
HELLO?
1831
01:20:05,300 --> 01:20:06,868
HELLO?
HELLO?
1832
01:20:06,902 --> 01:20:08,470
HELLO?
1833
01:20:08,503 --> 01:20:10,405
OH.
1834
01:20:23,218 --> 01:20:24,886
David:
LOOK. IAN'S HERE.
1835
01:20:24,920 --> 01:20:27,322
OH, GREAT.
1836
01:20:27,355 --> 01:20:29,558
GREAT.
1837
01:20:45,507 --> 01:20:48,410
OH, MY GOD!
JANE! IAN!
1838
01:20:48,443 --> 01:20:52,147
HI.
HI.
1839
01:20:53,648 --> 01:20:55,250
HOW YOU DOING, BUDDY?.
NIGHT, GUYS.
1840
01:21:00,288 --> 01:21:03,291
WHY IS THIS HAPPENING?
1841
01:21:03,325 --> 01:21:04,693
WHAT THE HELL IS GOING ON
AROUND HERE?!
1842
01:21:04,726 --> 01:21:07,028
SHE'S PREGNANT,
FOR GOD'S SAKES!
1843
01:21:07,062 --> 01:21:09,664
Jon: IAN!
1844
01:21:09,698 --> 01:21:11,533
IAN!
1845
01:21:14,269 --> 01:21:15,470
Jon: IAN, OPEN THE DOOR NOW.
1846
01:21:15,503 --> 01:21:17,105
DADDY.
1847
01:21:17,138 --> 01:21:19,140
KEATON'S GONNA
KICK YOUR ASS FOR THIS!
1848
01:21:19,174 --> 01:21:20,475
GOOD NIGHT, JON!
1849
01:21:20,508 --> 01:21:22,344
OH, COME ON, IAN.
1850
01:21:22,377 --> 01:21:25,380
YOU GUYS ARE
IN BUSINESS TOGETHER!
1851
01:21:25,413 --> 01:21:27,682
[GIGGLING]
1852
01:21:27,716 --> 01:21:29,050
NIGHT, JONNY.
1853
01:21:29,084 --> 01:21:30,652
[THUD]
1854
01:21:30,685 --> 01:21:32,254
WHOO-HOO-HOO!
1855
01:21:32,287 --> 01:21:34,122
COME ON. COME ON.
COME ON. COME ON.
1856
01:21:34,155 --> 01:21:35,257
GOD, RIGHT NOW.
RIGHT NOW.
1857
01:21:35,290 --> 01:21:36,625
IAN?
YES, DARLING?
1858
01:21:36,658 --> 01:21:38,159
[GROWLS]
1859
01:21:41,663 --> 01:21:43,131
KEATON!
1860
01:21:44,532 --> 01:21:46,134
KEATON, IT'S JON.
1861
01:21:46,167 --> 01:21:47,369
YOU MIGHT WANT
TO COME OUT HERE, BUDDY.
1862
01:21:47,402 --> 01:21:48,503
WE GOT A LOT GOING ON.
1863
01:21:52,707 --> 01:21:55,010
Jon: UH, KEATON?
[KNOCKING]
1864
01:21:55,043 --> 01:21:56,378
GOT A LITTLE
INSIDER TRADING WORKING
1865
01:21:56,411 --> 01:21:58,280
OVER IN THE OTHER
BEDROOM, BUDDY.
1866
01:21:58,313 --> 01:22:01,216
A LITTLE
PORK BELLY ACTIVITY,
IF YOU KNOW WHAT I MEAN.
1867
01:22:01,249 --> 01:22:03,985
THINK PORKING
AND A BIG BELLY!
1868
01:22:04,019 --> 01:22:06,621
YES!
AAH!
1869
01:22:08,790 --> 01:22:11,326
YES!
1870
01:22:11,359 --> 01:22:14,696
IAN'S FUCKING YOUR SISTER,
FOR GOD'S SAKES!
1871
01:22:14,729 --> 01:22:18,133
THAT WAS THE BEST ORGASM
I'VE EVER HAD.
1872
01:22:21,169 --> 01:22:23,371
CARLA?
1873
01:22:23,405 --> 01:22:25,573
Hans: I'VE SOMETIMES
BEEN KNOWN...
1874
01:22:27,709 --> 01:22:29,644
Jon: CARLA?
[KNOCKING]
1875
01:22:29,678 --> 01:22:31,379
IT'S JON.
TO SUCK THE WHITE LIGHT
1876
01:22:31,413 --> 01:22:34,582
RIGHT INTO
A PERSON'S BODY.
1877
01:22:34,616 --> 01:22:37,152
OK.
1878
01:22:37,185 --> 01:22:38,520
CARLA!
1879
01:22:39,621 --> 01:22:42,357
MMM.
1880
01:22:42,390 --> 01:22:43,591
I SEE THE LIGHT.
1881
01:22:43,625 --> 01:22:45,360
YOU DO?
UH-HUH.
1882
01:22:48,496 --> 01:22:50,031
IT'S PURPLE.
1883
01:22:50,065 --> 01:22:51,666
WELL,
IT SOON WILL BE.
1884
01:22:51,700 --> 01:22:53,101
ONE CHAKRA
AT A TIME.
1885
01:22:53,134 --> 01:22:54,736
OK.
1886
01:22:54,769 --> 01:22:56,104
AH.
1887
01:22:56,137 --> 01:22:57,205
OK.
1888
01:22:57,238 --> 01:22:58,273
[GROWLS]
1889
01:22:58,306 --> 01:23:00,575
OK. OH!
1890
01:23:00,608 --> 01:23:02,043
YELLOW...
1891
01:23:02,077 --> 01:23:03,144
YES.
1892
01:23:03,178 --> 01:23:04,813
[GROWLS]
RED...
1893
01:23:04,846 --> 01:23:07,582
[GROWLS]
OH, WHITE LIGHT!
1894
01:23:07,615 --> 01:23:09,751
HANS, WE HAD A DEAL!
1895
01:23:12,487 --> 01:23:14,589
ALL RIGHT! THAT'S IT!
1896
01:23:14,622 --> 01:23:16,257
IT'S MY TURN!
1897
01:23:16,291 --> 01:23:19,327
Hans: GOOMBAH, HEY!
1898
01:23:19,361 --> 01:23:21,062
[NEW JERSEY ACCENT]
I HAVE BEEN WORKIN'
THIS HOLE FOR DAYS.
1899
01:23:21,096 --> 01:23:23,398
YOU BLOW THIS FOR ME,
I WILL BUST A CAP IN YOUR ASS,
1900
01:23:23,431 --> 01:23:24,699
AND I WILL
GO HAVE A QUIET LUNCH.
1901
01:23:24,733 --> 01:23:26,368
CAPISCE?
1902
01:23:26,401 --> 01:23:27,635
CAPISCE.
1903
01:23:27,669 --> 01:23:30,271
WHERE ARE YOU FROM?
1904
01:23:30,305 --> 01:23:32,440
JERSEY, BABY.
1905
01:23:34,175 --> 01:23:36,578
[GERMAN ACCENT]
CARLA, I'M SOON TO BE COMING.
1906
01:23:41,182 --> 01:23:46,788
♪ AND THEN I'LL TELL YOU
WHAT YOU SURELY KNOW ♪
1907
01:23:46,821 --> 01:23:49,591
♪ I LOVE YOU,
I LOVE YOU ♪
1908
01:23:49,624 --> 01:23:52,861
♪ I LOVE YOU,
I LOVE YOU ♪
1909
01:23:52,894 --> 01:23:55,230
♪ I LOVE YOU
1910
01:23:55,263 --> 01:23:58,299
♪ I LOVE YOU,
I LOVE YOU ♪
1911
01:23:58,333 --> 01:24:00,835
♪ I LOVE YOU
1912
01:24:00,869 --> 01:24:03,772
♪ SO.
1913
01:24:11,579 --> 01:24:13,548
HOW DO YOU
LIKE THE CIGAR?
1914
01:24:14,916 --> 01:24:17,852
I LIKE IT ALMOST
AS MUCH AS THAT SONG.
1915
01:24:21,790 --> 01:24:23,725
JON...
1916
01:24:23,758 --> 01:24:25,760
LET ME ASK YOU SOMETHING,
RICHIE.
1917
01:24:28,329 --> 01:24:31,266
WHAT DO YOU DO
WHEN YOU'VE TRIED
AND TRIED AND...
1918
01:24:31,299 --> 01:24:34,736
TRIED AGAIN?
1919
01:24:38,573 --> 01:24:40,475
YOU LET GO.
1920
01:24:47,715 --> 01:24:51,419
[BEGINS PLAYING]
1921
01:24:53,521 --> 01:24:54,689
[SMACK]
1922
01:24:54,722 --> 01:24:56,324
OKAY.
OH, YES.
1923
01:24:56,357 --> 01:24:57,692
COME ON.
THAT'S RIGHT.
I'M A BAD BOY.
1924
01:24:57,725 --> 01:24:59,160
NOW SMACK THE BAD BOY.
1925
01:24:59,194 --> 01:25:00,795
SMACK THE BAD BOY.
1926
01:25:03,598 --> 01:25:06,634
[MOANING]
1927
01:25:10,605 --> 01:25:13,241
OH! OH!
1928
01:25:13,274 --> 01:25:14,609
OH!
1929
01:25:14,642 --> 01:25:16,511
MARRY ME, YES?
1930
01:25:16,544 --> 01:25:17,812
CONSIDER?
1931
01:25:17,846 --> 01:25:19,180
OH, HANS.
OH, DARLING.
1932
01:25:19,214 --> 01:25:20,615
OK.
CARLA.
1933
01:25:20,648 --> 01:25:23,418
OK. OK.
1934
01:25:23,451 --> 01:25:24,719
WE WORK AS A COUPLE.
1935
01:25:24,752 --> 01:25:27,255
WE'RE WORKING.
THIS IS WORKING.
1936
01:25:31,459 --> 01:25:32,694
SMACK MY ASS,
EVEN THOUGH I'M DONE.
1937
01:25:32,727 --> 01:25:33,895
OKAY.
1938
01:25:33,928 --> 01:25:36,331
OH, SCHEIßE.
OH, YES!
1939
01:25:41,870 --> 01:25:45,640
SO, UM, WHEN'D
YOU FIGURE OUT
YOU WERE GAY?
1940
01:25:48,676 --> 01:25:51,446
PROBABLY THE SAME TIME
YOU FIGURED OUT
YOU WERE STRAIGHT.
1941
01:25:52,547 --> 01:25:53,681
THANK YOU.
1942
01:25:55,817 --> 01:25:58,219
SO, LIKE, UM,
WHAT DO YOU DO?
1943
01:25:58,253 --> 01:26:01,422
I TOLD YOU.
I ART-DIRECT COMPUTER GAMES.
1944
01:26:01,456 --> 01:26:03,258
NO, I MEAN,
LIKE WITH GUYS.
1945
01:26:06,594 --> 01:26:07,795
YOU MEAN IN BED?
1946
01:26:07,829 --> 01:26:10,465
IN OR OUT OF BED.
1947
01:26:13,501 --> 01:26:15,470
WELL, UH...
1948
01:26:15,503 --> 01:26:17,972
OUT OF BED, I DO PRETTY MUCH
WHAT WE'RE DOING NOW.
1949
01:26:20,708 --> 01:26:22,710
AND IN BED?
1950
01:26:25,914 --> 01:26:27,649
WHATEVER COMES TO MIND.
1951
01:26:31,019 --> 01:26:32,587
NO, NO, NO.
I THINK IT'S GOOD.
1952
01:26:32,620 --> 01:26:34,289
I THINK IT'S GOOD,
JON.
1953
01:26:34,322 --> 01:26:36,357
I THINK YOU HAVE
A REAL FLAIR
FOR LANGUAGES.
1954
01:26:36,391 --> 01:26:37,525
JUST LET ME
HEAR IT AGAIN.
1955
01:26:37,559 --> 01:26:38,860
[GUTTURAL SOUNDS]
1956
01:26:38,893 --> 01:26:40,762
IT'S-- THAT'S
NOT QUITE IT.
1957
01:26:40,795 --> 01:26:42,630
ICH LIEBE DICH.
1958
01:26:42,664 --> 01:26:43,765
IT'S VERY SOFT.
1959
01:26:43,798 --> 01:26:45,300
YOU'RE SAYING,
"I LOVE YOU."
1960
01:26:45,333 --> 01:26:46,301
SAY IT BEAUTIFULLY.
1961
01:26:46,334 --> 01:26:47,635
ICH LIEBE DICH.
1962
01:26:47,669 --> 01:26:48,636
Richard:
THAT'S CLOSER.
1963
01:26:48,670 --> 01:26:51,506
Jon:
ICH LIEBE DICH.
1964
01:26:51,539 --> 01:26:52,941
Richard:
THAT'S NOT TOO GOOD.
1965
01:26:52,974 --> 01:26:54,609
IT'S NOT SO GUTTURAL.
ICH LIEBE DICH.
1966
01:26:54,642 --> 01:26:55,877
IT'S VERY SOFT.
1967
01:26:55,910 --> 01:26:58,012
ICH LIEBE...
1968
01:26:58,046 --> 01:27:01,382
OK, THAT'S A GERMAN
WITH A CLEFT PALATE,
BUT THAT'S OK.
1969
01:27:01,416 --> 01:27:05,553
NO, YOU'LL BE FINE.
NO, NO. RELAX.
I'M KIDDING.
1970
01:27:07,088 --> 01:27:09,023
ICH LIEBE DICH.
1971
01:27:09,057 --> 01:27:11,326
YOU THINK IT'LL WORK?
1972
01:27:11,359 --> 01:27:14,395
IF ANYTHING WILL WORK,
THIS--
1973
01:27:18,833 --> 01:27:20,835
YOU COMING BACK?
1974
01:27:20,868 --> 01:27:23,371
WE'RE GOING.
1975
01:27:23,404 --> 01:27:26,441
ICH LIEBE DICH.
1976
01:27:26,474 --> 01:27:28,343
OH!
1977
01:27:28,376 --> 01:27:31,813
OH, THANK YOU
FOR A WONDERFUL TIME.
1978
01:27:31,846 --> 01:27:32,981
NO, THANK YOU.
1979
01:27:33,014 --> 01:27:34,549
WHAT'S GOING ON?
1980
01:27:34,582 --> 01:27:35,717
WE'RE GOING
TO GET MARRIED.
1981
01:27:35,750 --> 01:27:37,919
YES, IS IT
NOT WONDERFUL?
1982
01:27:37,952 --> 01:27:39,954
Richard:
ALL THE LUCK
IN THE WORLD.
1983
01:27:39,988 --> 01:27:42,690
VERY WELL.
JON,
AUF WIEDERSEHEN.
1984
01:27:42,724 --> 01:27:44,859
GOOD NIGHT.
GUTE NACHT.
1985
01:27:44,892 --> 01:27:46,928
THANKS.
1986
01:27:49,697 --> 01:27:51,065
CHECK.
1987
01:27:54,035 --> 01:27:57,005
MERRY FUCKING CHRISTMAS.
1988
01:27:58,506 --> 01:27:59,874
MERRY CHRISTMAS
TO YOU, JON.
1989
01:28:08,850 --> 01:28:11,786
AND MATE.
1990
01:28:11,819 --> 01:28:13,554
GOOD GAME.
1991
01:28:13,588 --> 01:28:15,757
BUT NEXT TIME,
YOUR ASS IS MINE.
1992
01:28:15,790 --> 01:28:19,761
WHATEVER YOU SAY.
1993
01:28:19,794 --> 01:28:22,096
FUCK YOU, MAN.
I'M NOT DOWN WITH THAT.
1994
01:28:22,130 --> 01:28:23,998
TAKE ME HOME.
1995
01:28:34,108 --> 01:28:35,910
WHY DO YOU HAVE TO BE
A HOMO, HUH?
1996
01:28:35,943 --> 01:28:37,679
I CAN'T HELP IT!
1997
01:28:52,060 --> 01:28:53,928
SO TELL ME:
1998
01:28:53,961 --> 01:28:55,997
I MEAN,
WHAT'S IT EVEN LIKE
TO KISS A GUY?
1999
01:28:57,598 --> 01:28:59,834
IT'S BEEN SO LONG,
I DON'T REMEMBER.
2000
01:28:59,867 --> 01:29:02,904
WHAT'S IT LIKE
TO KISS A GIRL?
2001
01:29:02,937 --> 01:29:05,940
YOU DON'T EVEN
KNOW WHAT IT'S LIKE
TO KISS A GIRL?
2002
01:29:05,973 --> 01:29:08,076
WELL, I MEAN...
2003
01:29:10,578 --> 01:29:12,380
I...
2004
01:29:14,115 --> 01:29:16,017
KISSING A GIRL
IS A LOT SOFTER.
2005
01:29:17,885 --> 01:29:20,655
YEAH, DEFINITELY SOFTER.
2006
01:29:20,688 --> 01:29:22,757
WOW.
2007
01:29:23,991 --> 01:29:25,760
YOU KNOW,
WHAT YOU SAID YESTERDAY,
2008
01:29:25,793 --> 01:29:27,428
YOU REALLY
OUGHT TO SAY TO IAN.
2009
01:29:29,464 --> 01:29:31,432
I'M PLANNING TO.
2010
01:29:31,466 --> 01:29:33,468
IT WORKED ON ME.
2011
01:29:33,501 --> 01:29:34,769
YEAH.
2012
01:29:35,937 --> 01:29:38,206
[DOOR OPENS]
WHAT IS THAT?
2013
01:29:38,239 --> 01:29:39,674
[CLOSES]
2014
01:29:44,779 --> 01:29:45,980
COLD OUTSIDE.
2015
01:29:46,013 --> 01:29:47,582
VERY COLD.
2016
01:29:47,615 --> 01:29:48,883
DEFINITELY.
CAN I GET YOU SOMETHING?
2017
01:29:48,916 --> 01:29:50,118
WOULD YOU LIKE
SOME COFFEE?
2018
01:29:50,151 --> 01:29:53,187
UH, NO, I'M GONNA TURN IN.
NIGHT.
2019
01:29:57,125 --> 01:29:59,160
'FRAID THAT PUTS YOU
ON THE COUCH.
2020
01:30:06,667 --> 01:30:09,570
[SOBBING
OUTSIDE]
2021
01:30:16,844 --> 01:30:18,513
COME ON, HONEY.
2022
01:30:21,082 --> 01:30:24,118
[SOBBING CONTINUES]
2023
01:30:27,255 --> 01:30:29,590
JANE?
2024
01:30:31,726 --> 01:30:33,694
ARE YOU-- ARE YOU OK?
2025
01:30:35,530 --> 01:30:36,898
I--
2026
01:30:36,931 --> 01:30:39,200
I-- I--
2027
01:30:39,233 --> 01:30:42,970
THERE'S--
IT'S JUST I--
2028
01:30:43,004 --> 01:30:44,272
AWFUL?
2029
01:30:44,305 --> 01:30:46,073
NO.
2030
01:30:46,107 --> 01:30:47,542
NO, I--
2031
01:30:47,575 --> 01:30:49,811
I-- I-- I FEEL--
2032
01:30:49,844 --> 01:30:50,912
NO, IT'S JUST--
2033
01:30:50,945 --> 01:30:52,213
LONELY?
NO.
2034
01:30:52,246 --> 01:30:54,115
NO.
NO?
2035
01:30:54,148 --> 01:30:57,652
NO, I--
I FEEL LIKE--
2036
01:30:57,685 --> 01:31:01,689
LIKE I--
I JUST FEEL--
I FEEL LIKE--
2037
01:31:01,722 --> 01:31:06,661
I-- I FEEL...
2038
01:31:06,694 --> 01:31:10,231
SO UNBELIEVABLY
WONDERFUL.
2039
01:31:10,264 --> 01:31:11,799
WHAT?
2040
01:31:11,833 --> 01:31:14,936
I JUST--
I FEEL LIKE--
2041
01:31:14,969 --> 01:31:16,237
LIKE FINALLY--
2042
01:31:16,270 --> 01:31:17,638
THE BABY?
2043
01:31:17,672 --> 01:31:19,640
YEAH. UH-HUH.
2044
01:31:19,674 --> 01:31:21,909
IAN?
2045
01:31:21,943 --> 01:31:24,011
UH-HUH.
2046
01:31:24,045 --> 01:31:25,646
YEAH.
2047
01:31:27,114 --> 01:31:28,950
AND, UH...
2048
01:31:30,618 --> 01:31:32,019
AND YOU.
2049
01:31:32,053 --> 01:31:33,788
ME?
YEAH.
2050
01:32:13,828 --> 01:32:16,163
SO UNBELIEVABLY SEXY.
2051
01:32:20,668 --> 01:32:21,903
BREAKFAST!
2052
01:32:21,936 --> 01:32:24,138
OH, MY GOD!
2053
01:32:24,171 --> 01:32:25,773
WHAT? WHAT? WHAT?
2054
01:32:25,806 --> 01:32:27,909
HE'S COOKING AGAIN.
2055
01:32:27,942 --> 01:32:29,877
OH, JESUS.
OH, MAN.
2056
01:32:33,114 --> 01:32:34,282
WHOOP! OH!
2057
01:32:48,996 --> 01:32:52,199
CARLA. HEH.
2058
01:33:04,412 --> 01:33:06,747
OH, WHOA!
DAD, YOU KNOW WHAT?
2059
01:33:06,781 --> 01:33:09,183
YOU KINDA--
YOU GOTTA PAY A LITTLE MORE
ATTENTION TO THE, UH--
2060
01:33:09,216 --> 01:33:11,152
TO THE, UH--
THE COFFEE HERE.
2061
01:33:11,185 --> 01:33:12,887
ACTUALLY,
WITH THIS KIND OF MACHINE,
2062
01:33:12,920 --> 01:33:15,723
IT WORKS PRETTY WELL
WITH A FILTER.
2063
01:33:15,756 --> 01:33:17,358
SO, UH...
2064
01:33:18,793 --> 01:33:19,927
THERE WE GO.
2065
01:33:21,262 --> 01:33:23,164
WHOA, WHOA, WHOA.
2066
01:33:23,197 --> 01:33:25,232
HOT!
2067
01:33:25,266 --> 01:33:27,268
WHEW! HOT. HOT.
2068
01:33:28,402 --> 01:33:29,403
UH...
2069
01:33:33,441 --> 01:33:35,109
ACTUALLY,
YOU MIGHT WANT
TO START OVER, DAD.
2070
01:33:35,142 --> 01:33:37,812
THOSE LOOK A LITTLE
TOO FAR GONE.
2071
01:33:37,845 --> 01:33:39,146
RIGHT.
2072
01:33:39,180 --> 01:33:40,815
RIGHT.
2073
01:33:48,823 --> 01:33:51,125
[COUGHS]
2074
01:33:52,927 --> 01:33:55,129
SO, I'M NOT DOING
TOO BAD, AM I?
2075
01:33:56,430 --> 01:33:58,265
NOT TOO BAD.
2076
01:34:03,971 --> 01:34:05,373
I'VE BEEN TRYING
TO TELL YOU SOMETHING
2077
01:34:05,406 --> 01:34:08,242
SINCE YOU GOT HERE,
IF YOU HAVEN'T NOTICED...
2078
01:34:10,344 --> 01:34:13,247
UNSUCCESSFULLY
FOR VARIOUS REASONS.
2079
01:34:13,280 --> 01:34:15,383
JON IS A VERY
INTERESTING PERSON.
2080
01:34:15,416 --> 01:34:18,252
YES, HE IS.
2081
01:34:18,285 --> 01:34:20,087
AND IF YOU DON'T WANT
TO LISTEN TO ME,
2082
01:34:20,121 --> 01:34:22,990
BELIEVE ME, I UNDERSTAND.
2083
01:34:29,530 --> 01:34:31,699
WELL, YOU WERE RIGHT.
2084
01:34:33,000 --> 01:34:34,268
I MISSED YOUR CHILDHOOD.
2085
01:34:35,803 --> 01:34:37,138
I MISSED YOU GROWING UP.
2086
01:34:37,171 --> 01:34:41,909
I-- I JUST--
I DIDN'T PAY ATTENTION.
2087
01:34:41,942 --> 01:34:44,145
BUT, SEE, NOW I...
2088
01:34:44,178 --> 01:34:46,747
I WAKE UP IN THE MORNING,
2089
01:34:46,781 --> 01:34:48,416
AND YOUR MOTHER
ISN'T THERE.
2090
01:34:48,449 --> 01:34:51,819
AND THEN I GO
TO THE OFFICE,
2091
01:34:51,852 --> 01:34:53,821
AND I LOOK
AT THIS BUSINESS
2092
01:34:53,854 --> 01:34:56,290
THAT I HAVE SPENT
SO MUCH OF MY LIFE
2093
01:34:56,323 --> 01:34:59,160
AND SO MUCH COMMITMENT
AND SWEAT AND TIME
2094
01:34:59,193 --> 01:35:01,295
JUST TRYING TO BUILD IT UP,
2095
01:35:01,328 --> 01:35:03,230
AND I LOOK AT IT.
2096
01:35:03,264 --> 01:35:05,166
IT DOESN'T LOOK LIKE MUCH.
2097
01:35:06,267 --> 01:35:07,768
I CALL YOU.
2098
01:35:10,304 --> 01:35:11,906
YOU DON'T RESPOND.
2099
01:35:13,174 --> 01:35:15,810
YOU-- YOU DON'T CALL ME BACK.
2100
01:35:15,843 --> 01:35:17,978
I MEAN, I JUST--
IT'S LIKE I'M TALKING
TO A STONE.
2101
01:35:18,012 --> 01:35:22,016
AND I THINK, WELL,
SEE, I DON'T UNDERSTAND THAT.
2102
01:35:22,049 --> 01:35:23,317
WHAT-- WHAT HAVE I DONE?
2103
01:35:23,350 --> 01:35:25,186
WHAT TERRIBLE CRIME
HAVE I COMMITTED
2104
01:35:25,219 --> 01:35:27,421
THAT YOU WOULD TREAT ME
LIKE THAT?
2105
01:35:29,423 --> 01:35:31,058
YOU SEE, IAN...
2106
01:35:32,560 --> 01:35:35,129
I DIDN'T UNDERSTAND.
2107
01:35:35,162 --> 01:35:36,831
I-- I DIDN'T.
2108
01:35:36,864 --> 01:35:38,232
I DIDN'T UNDERSTAND
TILL NOW...
2109
01:35:40,401 --> 01:35:43,104
HOW MUCH PAIN
I'VE CAUSED YOU.
2110
01:35:44,305 --> 01:35:46,040
I'M SORRY.
2111
01:35:47,308 --> 01:35:49,176
I'M SORRY.
2112
01:35:50,945 --> 01:35:52,880
I JUST WANT YOU TO KNOW
IT WAS NOT YOUR FAULT.
2113
01:35:52,913 --> 01:35:55,850
YOU ARE NOT TO BLAME.
2114
01:35:55,883 --> 01:35:57,118
IT WAS ME.
2115
01:35:57,151 --> 01:36:00,087
I-- I DIDN'T
SOLVE MY PROBLEMS.
2116
01:36:02,923 --> 01:36:06,293
BUT I WANT YOU TO KNOW,
2117
01:36:06,327 --> 01:36:08,162
THAT I LOVE YOU...
2118
01:36:10,331 --> 01:36:11,799
MY SON.
2119
01:36:15,870 --> 01:36:17,071
I--
2120
01:36:17,104 --> 01:36:18,572
NO, I-- I GET IT, DAD.
2121
01:36:18,606 --> 01:36:21,275
IT'S OKAY.
2122
01:36:21,308 --> 01:36:23,978
I GET IT LOUD AND CLEAR.
2123
01:36:28,616 --> 01:36:30,217
[HORN HONKS]
2124
01:36:30,251 --> 01:36:31,952
OH.
YEAH.
2125
01:36:31,986 --> 01:36:34,021
OH, GOD! IAN--
2126
01:36:35,289 --> 01:36:36,857
Ian: WHO THE HECK
IS THAT?
2127
01:36:36,891 --> 01:36:38,626
IAN...
2128
01:36:38,659 --> 01:36:40,928
THAT'S YOUR SECRETARY?
YES, IT'S MY SECRETARY.
2129
01:36:40,961 --> 01:36:42,129
WHAT'S SHE DOING HERE?
2130
01:36:42,163 --> 01:36:43,397
WELL, OK,
THAT'S SOMETHING ELSE
2131
01:36:43,430 --> 01:36:45,166
THAT I WAS GOING
TO TELL YOU.
2132
01:36:45,199 --> 01:36:47,268
WHAT?
KATHERINE AND I
ARE GETTING MARRIED,
2133
01:36:47,301 --> 01:36:49,370
AND WE WOULD LIKE YOU
TO BE OUR BEST MAN.
2134
01:36:49,403 --> 01:36:51,205
Katherine: RICHARD.
2135
01:36:51,238 --> 01:36:53,641
UH...
2136
01:36:53,674 --> 01:36:55,476
RICHARD?
2137
01:36:55,509 --> 01:36:56,977
HI.
2138
01:37:01,282 --> 01:37:03,117
I THINK
HE'S STUNNED.
2139
01:37:03,150 --> 01:37:04,952
HAPPILY, I HOPE.
2140
01:37:04,985 --> 01:37:06,053
NICE TO MEET YOU AGAIN.
2141
01:37:06,086 --> 01:37:07,288
CONGRATULATIONS.
2142
01:37:07,321 --> 01:37:08,556
[FIRE ALARM BEEPS]
2143
01:37:08,589 --> 01:37:10,424
OH, NO,
HE'S NOT COOKING, IS HE?
2144
01:37:10,457 --> 01:37:12,092
IT'S ACTUALLY ON FIRE.
SHIT!
2145
01:37:12,126 --> 01:37:14,028
Richard: OH, MY GOD!
2146
01:37:14,061 --> 01:37:15,930
Ian: BE CAREFUL.
BE CAREFUL.
WAIT! WAIT! WAIT!
2147
01:37:15,963 --> 01:37:17,932
NO, JUST
PUT IT IN THE SINK.
PUT IT IN THE SINK!
2148
01:37:17,965 --> 01:37:20,067
Richard: GET SOME WATER.
WE'LL DOUSE IT--
2149
01:37:20,100 --> 01:37:22,136
I KNOW WHAT I'M DOING.
PLEASE!
2150
01:37:22,169 --> 01:37:24,238
I'M GONNA--
I KNOW WHAT I'M DOING!
2151
01:37:24,271 --> 01:37:25,372
OH, GOD!
2152
01:37:25,406 --> 01:37:27,141
[LAUGHING]
2153
01:37:27,174 --> 01:37:29,243
RICHARD, I TOLD YOU
NOT TO COOK.
2154
01:37:29,276 --> 01:37:32,146
I KNOW.
I THOUGHT I COULD HELP.
2155
01:37:32,179 --> 01:37:33,647
I GUESS THAT MEANS
NO BREAKFAST?
2156
01:37:33,681 --> 01:37:36,016
YEAH, NO BREAKFAST.
OH, GOD.
2157
01:37:39,653 --> 01:37:42,556
Ian: IT'S UNBELIEVABLE.
2158
01:37:48,095 --> 01:37:50,264
WELL, THIS SUCKS.
2159
01:37:50,297 --> 01:37:52,299
THIS REALLY SUCKS.
2160
01:37:53,400 --> 01:37:54,468
WHO'S THAT GUY?
2161
01:37:54,501 --> 01:37:57,371
WELL, YOU MIGHT ASK.
2162
01:38:01,575 --> 01:38:03,277
[HONKS]
2163
01:38:07,748 --> 01:38:09,416
Jon: HOW'S HANS?
2164
01:38:10,517 --> 01:38:11,952
OH, FUCK OFF.
2165
01:38:16,190 --> 01:38:18,058
YOU OK?
2166
01:38:19,393 --> 01:38:20,995
YES.
2167
01:38:21,028 --> 01:38:23,397
YOU KNOW,
IF YOU WEREN'T SUCH A JERK,
2168
01:38:23,430 --> 01:38:25,032
WE COULD HAVE HAD
A GREAT WEEKEND
2169
01:38:25,065 --> 01:38:28,202
GETTING TO KNOW EACH OTHER,
SKIING, TAKING PICTURES,
2170
01:38:28,235 --> 01:38:31,138
BUT INSTEAD
YOU TREAT ME LIKE AIR,
2171
01:38:31,171 --> 01:38:33,207
AND YOU FORCE ME
IN THE ARMS OF THAT...
2172
01:38:33,240 --> 01:38:36,143
MANIAC FROM--
FROM WHEREVER HE'S FROM.
2173
01:38:36,176 --> 01:38:37,444
NEW JERSEY.
2174
01:38:37,478 --> 01:38:38,646
SHUT UP WHILE I'M TALKING.
2175
01:38:38,679 --> 01:38:40,114
AT LEAST HE RECOGNIZES
2176
01:38:40,147 --> 01:38:41,749
A WOMAN HAS EMOTIONAL
AND SPIRITUAL NEEDS
2177
01:38:41,782 --> 01:38:44,351
BEYOND THE PURELY SEXUAL.
2178
01:38:44,385 --> 01:38:45,552
YOU UNDERSTAND ME?
2179
01:38:45,586 --> 01:38:47,354
YES.
2180
01:38:47,388 --> 01:38:48,756
IF YOU WANT ME
TO CARE ABOUT YOU,
2181
01:38:48,789 --> 01:38:51,025
IT'S GOING TO TAKE
MORE THAN A MERCEDES
2182
01:38:51,058 --> 01:38:54,428
OR THAT WORN-OUT LINE OF YOURS
ABOUT DISCOVERING SUPERMODELS.
2183
01:38:56,463 --> 01:38:58,499
YOU HAVE TO FOCUS
YOUR ATTENTION ON ME
2184
01:38:58,532 --> 01:39:00,401
AND MAKE IT ABOUT ME.
2185
01:39:00,434 --> 01:39:01,735
YOU GOT THAT?
2186
01:39:01,769 --> 01:39:03,504
YES.
2187
01:39:03,537 --> 01:39:05,406
BECAUSE I'M
THE KIND OF GIRL YOU MARRY.
2188
01:39:28,529 --> 01:39:30,631
ICH LIEBE DICH.
2189
01:40:19,179 --> 01:40:22,583
♪ HOW COULD I KNOW
I'D FEEL THIS WAY? ♪
2190
01:40:26,353 --> 01:40:29,623
♪ HOW COULD I KNOW
THAT ONE FINE DAY ♪
2191
01:40:31,525 --> 01:40:34,728
♪ YOU'D BE MINE?
2192
01:40:34,762 --> 01:40:38,365
♪ I HAD SEARCHED
MY WHOLE LIFE THROUGH ♪
2193
01:40:38,399 --> 01:40:41,635
♪ JUST TO FIND
2194
01:40:41,668 --> 01:40:43,704
♪ I'D BEEN WAITIN'
2195
01:40:43,737 --> 01:40:47,307
♪ FOR SOMEONE LIKE YOU
2196
01:40:48,442 --> 01:40:51,745
♪ SOMEONE LIKE YOU
2197
01:40:51,779 --> 01:40:55,449
♪ SOMEONE LIKE YOU
2198
01:40:55,482 --> 01:40:57,751
♪ SOMEONE LIKE YOU
2199
01:41:00,487 --> 01:41:04,224
♪ I HAD SOME DREAM,
SOME FANTASY ♪
2200
01:41:07,494 --> 01:41:11,265
♪ OF WHO
THAT SOMEONE WOULD BE ♪
2201
01:41:12,599 --> 01:41:16,403
♪ I'VE BEEN SO BLIND
2202
01:41:16,437 --> 01:41:19,506
♪ UP TILL NOW
I COULDN'T SEE ♪
2203
01:41:19,540 --> 01:41:23,310
♪ THAT ALL THIS TIME
2204
01:41:23,343 --> 01:41:28,449
♪ YOU'VE BEEN STANDING
RIGHT IN FRONT OF ME ♪
2205
01:41:30,217 --> 01:41:33,454
♪ SOMEONE FOR ME
2206
01:41:33,487 --> 01:41:36,824
♪ SOMEONE FOR ME
2207
01:41:36,857 --> 01:41:39,893
♪ SOMEONE FOR ME
2208
01:41:56,210 --> 01:41:59,746
♪ NOW EVERY DAY
AND EVERY NIGHT ♪
2209
01:42:02,983 --> 01:42:06,420
♪ I GET TO BE
WITH ONE SO RIGHT ♪
2210
01:42:07,988 --> 01:42:11,859
♪ SO GOOD FOR ME
2211
01:42:11,892 --> 01:42:14,862
♪ I CAN'T BELIEVE
THAT THIS IS TRUE ♪
2212
01:42:14,895 --> 01:42:18,699
♪ NOW, I CAN SEE
2213
01:42:18,732 --> 01:42:24,171
♪ THAT MY HEART
HAD BEEN HOLDIN' OUT FOR YOU ♪
2214
01:42:25,506 --> 01:42:28,942
♪ SOMEONE LIKE YOU
2215
01:42:28,976 --> 01:42:32,479
♪ SOMEONE LIKE YOU
2216
01:42:32,513 --> 01:42:35,883
♪ SOMEONE LIKE YOU
2217
01:42:35,916 --> 01:42:39,553
♪ SOMEONE LIKE YOU
2218
01:42:39,586 --> 01:42:42,856
♪ SOMEONE LIKE YOU
2219
01:42:42,890 --> 01:42:46,426
♪ SOMEONE LIKE ME
2220
01:42:46,460 --> 01:42:48,862
♪ SOMEONE LIKE YOU
2221
01:42:48,896 --> 01:42:51,265
♪ YEAH.
2222
01:43:05,913 --> 01:43:10,651
WHY DOES IT ALWAYS
HAVE TO BE ABOUT SEX?!
137764
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