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These are the user uploaded subtitles that are being translated: 1 00:00:02,542 --> 00:00:04,715 â™Ș â™Ș 2 00:00:19,024 --> 00:00:21,263 â™Ș Thanksgiving, it's Thanksgiving â™Ș 3 00:00:21,330 --> 00:00:23,705 â™Ș And we're putting smiles on old people's â™Ș 4 00:00:23,805 --> 00:00:25,309 â™Ș Old person faces. â™Ș 5 00:00:25,375 --> 00:00:27,348 Not that I don't want to go to the Elegant Doily 6 00:00:27,448 --> 00:00:29,756 old people's home‐‐ I mean, I love doilies and all‐‐ 7 00:00:29,823 --> 00:00:32,463 but why are we doing this on Thanksgiving again? 8 00:00:32,531 --> 00:00:33,835 Ginger went there last Thanksgiving 9 00:00:33,935 --> 00:00:35,072 and said it was very rewarding. 10 00:00:35,172 --> 00:00:36,844 You know, play checkers with old people, 11 00:00:36,911 --> 00:00:39,351 let 'em pinch your cheeks, talk about their favorite wars. 12 00:00:39,451 --> 00:00:41,959 It's good to give back a little since we have so much. 13 00:00:42,059 --> 00:00:43,832 So much of what, exactly? 14 00:00:43,932 --> 00:00:45,571 Napkins, maybe? We did just stock up. 15 00:00:45,638 --> 00:00:48,411 Giving back sounds nice. I wish I could give back to Merryl, 16 00:00:48,478 --> 00:00:50,786 but she left the Elegant Doily and moved in with her boyfriend. 17 00:00:50,919 --> 00:00:52,959 Do you still say "boyfriend" when they're in their 90s? 18 00:00:53,092 --> 00:00:54,362 You say "elderberry." 19 00:00:54,396 --> 00:00:56,001 Plus, your father and I will probably end up 20 00:00:56,068 --> 00:00:57,471 in a home someday. 21 00:00:57,539 --> 00:00:59,044 It'll be a nice little preview. 22 00:00:59,144 --> 00:01:01,016 Oh, no, we'll never be able to afford that. 23 00:01:01,116 --> 00:01:02,889 I'm excited to get back home and get cracking 24 00:01:02,955 --> 00:01:04,225 on that maple glaze for the turkey. 25 00:01:04,292 --> 00:01:06,231 Man, Thanksgiving is the best holiday. 26 00:01:06,298 --> 00:01:08,873 There in the kitchen, the excitement, the adrenaline. 27 00:01:08,907 --> 00:01:12,016 Oh, yeah. You're all fun in the kitchen on Thanksgiving. 28 00:01:12,083 --> 00:01:13,319 Just, uh, getting a snack, uh... 29 00:01:13,386 --> 00:01:15,192 Hot plate! Hot plate! Out of the way! 30 00:01:15,258 --> 00:01:16,998 ‐Hey, Dad, do you think I could... ‐Ask your mother! 31 00:01:17,098 --> 00:01:18,401 ‐Dinner's in 20 minutes! ‐Aah! 32 00:01:18,468 --> 00:01:19,806 ‐No, no, no. 30. ‐Aah! 33 00:01:19,873 --> 00:01:22,380 So, what would you say is the minimum amount of time 34 00:01:22,446 --> 00:01:24,185 we can spend at the Elegant Doily? 35 00:01:24,319 --> 00:01:25,858 Don't you worry your pretty little hairy neck, Bob. 36 00:01:25,958 --> 00:01:28,532 We'll get you home soon so you can start doing your cooking. 37 00:01:28,565 --> 00:01:30,437 BOB: Oh, is my neck that hairy right now? 38 00:01:30,505 --> 00:01:32,511 GENE: Yeah, it's probably time to harvest. 39 00:01:32,577 --> 00:01:34,583 Yep. Just like I remembered it. 40 00:01:34,684 --> 00:01:36,422 Oh, this is where all the carpet is. 41 00:01:36,455 --> 00:01:38,930 Got‐dang it. Give me my damn orange soda! 42 00:01:39,030 --> 00:01:40,434 BOB: Oh, hi, Sergeant Bosco. 43 00:01:40,501 --> 00:01:43,242 Are you here visiting your very pleasant mom? 44 00:01:43,309 --> 00:01:44,848 Yeah, but she won't come out of her room. 45 00:01:44,915 --> 00:01:47,221 And if Mother doesn't do Thanksgiving activities 46 00:01:47,288 --> 00:01:49,127 with her nursing home friends today, 47 00:01:49,194 --> 00:01:51,836 she'll gripe about it all year long! 48 00:01:51,936 --> 00:01:53,072 You having soda troubles? 49 00:01:53,139 --> 00:01:54,543 You know, the front's just glass. 50 00:01:54,644 --> 00:01:55,848 ‐You could smash it. ‐Louise. 51 00:01:55,881 --> 00:01:57,987 ‐Or shoot it. ‐Interesting, interesting. 52 00:01:58,054 --> 00:01:59,290 Let me help you with that. 53 00:01:59,357 --> 00:02:01,330 This machine is quite the quarter gobbler. 54 00:02:01,430 --> 00:02:03,504 Ooh, stretchy keys. That's fun. 55 00:02:03,604 --> 00:02:05,108 Here you go. 56 00:02:05,175 --> 00:02:07,114 Ah, yeah. Get in there, fructose. 57 00:02:07,214 --> 00:02:08,920 Thanks, Deirdre. Wish me luck. 58 00:02:08,987 --> 00:02:10,893 Oh, you're Deirdre. I'm Linda. 59 00:02:10,993 --> 00:02:12,732 ‐We spoke on the phone. ‐Linda. 60 00:02:12,799 --> 00:02:14,570 And this must be your lovely family. 61 00:02:14,603 --> 00:02:16,609 We prefer "hot family," thank you. 62 00:02:16,677 --> 00:02:19,451 Well, we are thankful you're helping us out this morning. 63 00:02:19,518 --> 00:02:21,323 Follow me. I'll get you all set up. 64 00:02:21,423 --> 00:02:23,262 Oh, I left the hard candies in the car. 65 00:02:23,329 --> 00:02:25,268 Old people still like hard candy, right? 66 00:02:25,335 --> 00:02:27,441 They love to unwrap them whenever it's very quiet. 67 00:02:27,542 --> 00:02:29,816 You go ahead. I'll catch up. I'll catch up. 68 00:02:29,916 --> 00:02:31,119 You will be helping out with 69 00:02:31,186 --> 00:02:33,125 a very important Thanksgiving job: 70 00:02:33,192 --> 00:02:35,600 making the paper turkey decorations. 71 00:02:35,667 --> 00:02:37,673 Gotcha. Do you want sturdy turkeys or flirty turkeys? 72 00:02:37,740 --> 00:02:39,746 PAUL (on walkie‐talkie): Deirdre, it's Paul. 73 00:02:39,813 --> 00:02:41,450 Mr. Thompson said that you said 74 00:02:41,551 --> 00:02:43,624 that he didn't have to wear pants on holidays. 75 00:02:43,691 --> 00:02:46,431 No, I said always pants all the time. 76 00:02:46,498 --> 00:02:48,171 ‐Disagree. ‐Hi. How are you? 77 00:02:48,271 --> 00:02:49,608 Nice... nice turkey. 78 00:02:49,676 --> 00:02:52,383 You worry about your own turkey, fella. 79 00:02:52,483 --> 00:02:54,289 BOSCO: You want me to carry you? I could. 80 00:02:54,355 --> 00:02:55,994 I've been doing several push‐ups a day 81 00:02:56,061 --> 00:02:57,198 before I take a shower. 82 00:02:57,264 --> 00:02:59,003 (scoffs) Probably against the sink. 83 00:02:59,070 --> 00:03:00,575 Yeah, against the sink. So what? 84 00:03:00,641 --> 00:03:04,385 Hi. I couldn't help overhearing your loud conversation. 85 00:03:04,452 --> 00:03:06,124 Seems like someone doesn't want to join 86 00:03:06,225 --> 00:03:07,428 all the Thanksgiving fun. 87 00:03:07,494 --> 00:03:09,367 I'm Linda. My family's here today, 88 00:03:09,434 --> 00:03:11,139 giving back‐‐ no big deal. 89 00:03:11,240 --> 00:03:13,145 ‐So, can I help? ‐My son has a gun. 90 00:03:13,212 --> 00:03:14,650 ‐Don't mess with us. ‐Mother. 91 00:03:14,784 --> 00:03:17,258 Do you want two pounds of hard candy? 92 00:03:17,358 --> 00:03:18,963 Take the candy. Get rid of the lady. 93 00:03:19,030 --> 00:03:20,133 Close the door. 94 00:03:20,166 --> 00:03:21,604 GENE: I'm having real trouble 95 00:03:21,705 --> 00:03:23,745 making turkey waddles that don't look like testicles. 96 00:03:23,811 --> 00:03:25,148 ‐Me, too. ‐ZEKE: Come on! Come on! 97 00:03:25,248 --> 00:03:26,285 TINA: Is that Zeke? 98 00:03:26,385 --> 00:03:27,522 Is he wrestling his grandma? 99 00:03:27,589 --> 00:03:28,893 ‐Ah, come on! ‐Hey, Zeke. 100 00:03:28,960 --> 00:03:30,030 Hey, Tina, girl. 101 00:03:30,130 --> 00:03:31,567 ‐Louise. G‐man. ‐Doctor. 102 00:03:31,634 --> 00:03:33,439 Did your grandparents move in here or something? 103 00:03:33,540 --> 00:03:35,713 Tell 'em to watch out‐‐ the hazing process is crazy. 104 00:03:35,814 --> 00:03:38,823 Nah, we're making paper turkeys with testicles on their chins. 105 00:03:38,923 --> 00:03:40,528 ‐Oh, cool. ‐What are you doing? 106 00:03:40,594 --> 00:03:42,768 Every year, my grandma and the other elders watch 107 00:03:42,835 --> 00:03:46,011 the OMG Mall Group Thanksgiving Day Parade on the TV. 108 00:03:46,078 --> 00:03:49,153 Oh, the OMGMGTDP? I love that parade. 109 00:03:49,220 --> 00:03:51,059 Yeah, but the cable's out. 110 00:03:51,126 --> 00:03:53,299 Did you fix the cable yet, Zeke? 111 00:03:53,366 --> 00:03:54,603 Sorry, Grandma. 112 00:03:54,670 --> 00:03:57,211 I'm giving it all I got, but it's just not enough. 113 00:03:57,277 --> 00:03:58,715 I'm sorry, everyone. 114 00:03:58,783 --> 00:04:01,156 We're not gonna be able to watch the parade this year. 115 00:04:01,223 --> 00:04:02,393 ‐Oh, no. ‐(grumbling) 116 00:04:02,459 --> 00:04:03,965 Man, that's a lot of frowning. 117 00:04:03,998 --> 00:04:05,771 ‐And new wrinkles, I bet. ‐Dang it! 118 00:04:05,837 --> 00:04:08,277 I wish I was a wizard so I could give these angels 119 00:04:08,344 --> 00:04:09,414 the parade they deserve. 120 00:04:09,515 --> 00:04:13,560 No OMGMGTDP on TGD? That's BS! 121 00:04:13,660 --> 00:04:16,201 It would be nice to do something nice. 122 00:04:16,268 --> 00:04:18,207 Maybe that's how we could do our giving back‐ing. 123 00:04:18,274 --> 00:04:20,882 Maybe we could try to do some kind of entertainment? 124 00:04:20,949 --> 00:04:22,654 Not a parade, but like a parade? 125 00:04:22,754 --> 00:04:25,128 These people want a parade, specifically. 126 00:04:25,195 --> 00:04:26,599 They do have parade face. 127 00:04:26,666 --> 00:04:28,538 Hmm, we know they've got some basic art supplies, 128 00:04:28,638 --> 00:04:30,076 and we've got our charisma. 129 00:04:30,176 --> 00:04:31,949 And a deep knowledge of the American songbook. 130 00:04:32,015 --> 00:04:34,523 Are we doing a parade? I think we're doing a parade. 131 00:04:34,623 --> 00:04:35,894 Well, I'm here all day. 132 00:04:35,961 --> 00:04:37,833 And I've cut enough turkey face testicles 133 00:04:37,900 --> 00:04:39,538 for a lifetime, so I'm in. 134 00:04:39,605 --> 00:04:41,309 Good thing I brought my bass drum. 135 00:04:41,376 --> 00:04:42,647 (imitates drumbeat) 136 00:04:42,747 --> 00:04:45,355 Guess what, everyone. The parade is back on. 137 00:04:45,422 --> 00:04:47,461 ‐(cheering) ‐Not on TV, though. 138 00:04:47,562 --> 00:04:49,668 ‐(murmuring) ‐Oh, boy. Tough crowd. 139 00:04:49,735 --> 00:04:52,142 Your turkey is... I would just start over. 140 00:04:52,209 --> 00:04:53,479 Oh, my God. 141 00:04:53,613 --> 00:04:55,351 DEIRDRE: Hi. Can you cook lots of food? No? 142 00:04:55,485 --> 00:04:57,659 Hey. Feel like cooking a ton of food? No? 143 00:04:57,759 --> 00:04:59,999 Can anyone here cook lots of food? 144 00:05:00,066 --> 00:05:01,436 Um, I can. 145 00:05:01,504 --> 00:05:03,042 So, yeah, our cook had to step out 146 00:05:03,142 --> 00:05:05,048 for just a few minutes‐‐ probably more. 147 00:05:05,115 --> 00:05:06,318 Her water broke. 148 00:05:06,384 --> 00:05:07,655 She's in labor‐‐ at the hospital. 149 00:05:07,722 --> 00:05:09,929 And it turns out our other cook is the father, 150 00:05:10,029 --> 00:05:12,537 so he's probably out for the day as well. 151 00:05:12,604 --> 00:05:14,776 So there's no one to cook all of this food 152 00:05:14,878 --> 00:05:16,448 ‐for the whole place. ‐Right. 153 00:05:16,481 --> 00:05:18,354 ‐On Thanksgiving. ‐Yes. 154 00:05:18,420 --> 00:05:20,126 ‐Well, I'm happy to do it. ‐Really? 155 00:05:20,193 --> 00:05:21,865 I mean, even if you just made the turkey 156 00:05:21,932 --> 00:05:23,803 and maybe mashed potatoes, that would be amazing. 157 00:05:23,871 --> 00:05:25,977 Sure. Sure. Yeah, I think I can handle it. 158 00:05:26,077 --> 00:05:27,481 I‐I actually have a restaurant. 159 00:05:27,549 --> 00:05:29,487 That's incredible. We are so lucky. 160 00:05:29,555 --> 00:05:31,761 Well, we're not a popular restaurant. 161 00:05:31,827 --> 00:05:33,901 ‐Neither are we. ‐We‐we don't make a lot of money. 162 00:05:33,968 --> 00:05:35,907 Neither do I. Anyway, thank you. 163 00:05:36,007 --> 00:05:37,847 Hi, kitchen. I'm‐I'm Bob. 164 00:05:37,913 --> 00:05:39,383 Uh, let's get into it. 165 00:05:39,518 --> 00:05:41,791 No, that sounded lame. Sorry, kitchen. 166 00:05:41,824 --> 00:05:43,362 (in high‐pitched voice): It's okay. 167 00:05:43,429 --> 00:05:45,468 You're cooking Thanksgiving? For the whole place? 168 00:05:45,536 --> 00:05:48,244 I know! I'm like the guy in the audience who can play guitar 169 00:05:48,310 --> 00:05:50,149 and the band says, "Can anyone play guitar?" 170 00:05:50,250 --> 00:05:53,259 ‐And I go onstage, and it's amazing. ‐Yeah, it's just like that, Bob. 171 00:05:53,325 --> 00:05:55,599 We can have our own dinner at home a little late, right? 172 00:05:55,699 --> 00:05:57,538 Sure, but just keep it simple in there. 173 00:05:57,605 --> 00:05:59,210 You know how you get on Thanksgiving. 174 00:05:59,310 --> 00:06:00,380 You get a little amped up. 175 00:06:00,480 --> 00:06:01,952 What do you mean? I'm amped down. 176 00:06:02,019 --> 00:06:03,891 You're gonna need some help. I'll come soon. 177 00:06:03,991 --> 00:06:06,464 Sergeant Bosco's mom and I are just starting to hit it off. 178 00:06:06,565 --> 00:06:07,602 When will she leave? 179 00:06:07,669 --> 00:06:08,838 Wait, aren't the kids with you? 180 00:06:08,906 --> 00:06:11,346 No. They left me with the paper turkeys 181 00:06:11,446 --> 00:06:13,218 and a guy who was kind of mean. 182 00:06:13,285 --> 00:06:14,556 All right, I got to go. 183 00:06:14,656 --> 00:06:16,662 Knifey's ready to get dicey. 184 00:06:16,762 --> 00:06:19,136 You want us to be in the kitchen 185 00:06:19,203 --> 00:06:21,711 cooking with Dad on Thanksgiving? 186 00:06:21,777 --> 00:06:23,215 (laughing): No, thank you very much. 187 00:06:23,315 --> 00:06:24,753 He doesn't want anyone in the kitchen 188 00:06:24,820 --> 00:06:26,592 with him on Thanksgiving. He's a lone wolf. 189 00:06:26,659 --> 00:06:28,565 But slightly more hairy and more vicious. 190 00:06:28,665 --> 00:06:30,638 Okay, I know your father can be... 191 00:06:30,704 --> 00:06:32,209 ‐A Thankszilla? ‐A Thankszilla. 192 00:06:32,275 --> 00:06:35,218 But at least one of you needs to go in there and help out, okay? 193 00:06:35,318 --> 00:06:36,722 Ugh. Fine. Hand farts? 194 00:06:36,789 --> 00:06:38,662 ‐Weakest one goes with Dad? ‐Yeah. ‐Sure. 195 00:06:38,762 --> 00:06:40,601 (making fart sounds) 196 00:06:40,668 --> 00:06:41,737 (makes quiet sound) 197 00:06:41,804 --> 00:06:43,409 ‐No! ‐Yes. ‐Ha! 198 00:06:43,475 --> 00:06:44,646 I've been practicing. 199 00:06:44,746 --> 00:06:46,017 Damn these tiny hands! 200 00:06:46,084 --> 00:06:47,956 I don't want to cook with Thankszilla. 201 00:06:48,057 --> 00:06:50,029 Y'all hand‐farting? I like to hand‐fart. 202 00:06:54,208 --> 00:06:55,779 Dad? Mom told me to come in here 203 00:06:55,846 --> 00:06:57,351 to help you‐‐ in a kitchen, on Thanksgiving. 204 00:06:57,417 --> 00:06:59,190 ‐Thoughts? Concerns? ‐Oh, okay. Great. 205 00:06:59,256 --> 00:07:00,794 Oh, you don't seem so excited. 206 00:07:00,861 --> 00:07:02,165 Maybe I should just go. 207 00:07:02,232 --> 00:07:04,405 No, no, I mean, I probably do need the help. 208 00:07:04,472 --> 00:07:06,579 And it could be fun. Also, I feel like 209 00:07:06,679 --> 00:07:08,651 I got a good handle on everything, schedule‐wise. 210 00:07:08,685 --> 00:07:11,393 I guess, in a way, I've been training my whole life for this. 211 00:07:11,459 --> 00:07:14,268 ‐So, there's potatoes for mashed potatoes. ‐Good eye. 212 00:07:14,335 --> 00:07:16,842 I found sausage, so we'll make sausage stuffing. 213 00:07:16,909 --> 00:07:18,983 ‐There's turkey breasts. ‐Put a bra on those. 214 00:07:19,116 --> 00:07:21,156 There's green beans. There's cranberry sauce. 215 00:07:21,222 --> 00:07:23,095 Oh, you're probably gonna want a headband, 216 00:07:23,162 --> 00:07:25,301 'cause we're in the eye of the storm. 217 00:07:25,368 --> 00:07:27,074 ‐LOUIS: Settle down, tiger. ‐BOB: Hey. They have one of these. 218 00:07:27,174 --> 00:07:29,213 Whoa, what's that? Some kind of kitchen gun? 219 00:07:29,280 --> 00:07:32,456 Sort of. It's a torch used for finishing crĂšme brĂ»lĂ©e. 220 00:07:32,557 --> 00:07:34,361 It shoots fire when you press this button. 221 00:07:34,428 --> 00:07:36,101 Let me see, let me see, let me see. 222 00:07:36,167 --> 00:07:38,140 Hey, you know, I was gonna make sweet potato casserole, 223 00:07:38,173 --> 00:07:40,747 and we could use this to brown the marshmallows on top. 224 00:07:40,814 --> 00:07:43,122 A gun that makes fire? Yes, please. 225 00:07:43,188 --> 00:07:45,194 Should we make fire with it right now? 226 00:07:45,261 --> 00:07:47,134 No, we have lots to do before that. 227 00:07:47,200 --> 00:07:48,938 But, tell you what, how would you like 228 00:07:49,039 --> 00:07:51,112 to be Captain Casserole and learn how to make it? 229 00:07:51,179 --> 00:07:53,988 Does, uh, Captain Casserole get to shoot the fire gun? 230 00:07:54,054 --> 00:07:56,529 ‐She does, eventually. ‐Then call me Captain. 231 00:07:56,595 --> 00:07:58,935 Wait, do I outrank you? Oh, that's embarrassing. 232 00:07:59,036 --> 00:08:00,808 Uh‐oh. Now we're behind schedule. 233 00:08:00,908 --> 00:08:02,479 Uh, let's kick it in gear, okay? 234 00:08:02,513 --> 00:08:03,983 You‐you sure you don't want a headband? 235 00:08:04,118 --> 00:08:06,124 Ooh, you know, I hear that all the cool seniors 236 00:08:06,224 --> 00:08:07,962 are hanging out in the rec room today. 237 00:08:08,063 --> 00:08:10,002 You want to go check out that scene? I do. 238 00:08:10,069 --> 00:08:12,475 No! I'm not going until Gary calls. 239 00:08:12,543 --> 00:08:13,646 Who's Gary? 240 00:08:13,713 --> 00:08:15,586 ‐My brother. ‐My other son. 241 00:08:15,652 --> 00:08:16,922 That's it, I'm carrying you out. 242 00:08:17,023 --> 00:08:19,196 What? No. Uh, Sergeant Bosco, 243 00:08:19,263 --> 00:08:21,737 would you come look at these pretty flowers with me? 244 00:08:21,871 --> 00:08:23,475 I bought those. I've already seen 'em. 245 00:08:23,576 --> 00:08:24,846 Come on. 246 00:08:24,913 --> 00:08:26,184 Okay, this is not going great. 247 00:08:26,251 --> 00:08:28,056 Don't you do hostage negotiations? 248 00:08:28,123 --> 00:08:30,964 ‐This is a hostage negotiation, right? ‐I guess. 249 00:08:30,998 --> 00:08:32,904 So, what's the first step in one of those? 250 00:08:32,937 --> 00:08:34,943 Establish a rapport to gain their trust. 251 00:08:35,010 --> 00:08:36,782 Hello. She's your mother. 252 00:08:36,849 --> 00:08:38,120 Right, so too late for that. 253 00:08:38,186 --> 00:08:39,824 Well, well, wh‐what's after that? 254 00:08:39,925 --> 00:08:42,465 Asking open‐ended questions to give them a sense of control 255 00:08:42,533 --> 00:08:43,670 and feel them out. 256 00:08:43,736 --> 00:08:45,207 Okay. All right. 257 00:08:45,308 --> 00:08:47,782 So, Lillian, do you like 258 00:08:47,882 --> 00:08:49,788 ‐open‐ended questions? ‐No. 259 00:08:49,888 --> 00:08:51,660 That's a closed‐ended question, Linda. 260 00:08:51,727 --> 00:08:52,863 Oh, right. 261 00:08:52,930 --> 00:08:54,134 How are the sweet potatoes coming? 262 00:08:54,234 --> 00:08:56,040 Good, but I should check the marshmallows, 263 00:08:56,107 --> 00:08:57,511 make sure they're ripe. 264 00:08:57,612 --> 00:08:59,216 Mmm. Tough to tell. Mmm! 265 00:08:59,283 --> 00:09:00,319 No eating, more peeling. 266 00:09:00,386 --> 00:09:03,161 Oh, they have brussels sprouts. I can roast those. 267 00:09:03,195 --> 00:09:04,532 Wait, you want to add another dish? 268 00:09:04,633 --> 00:09:06,104 Yeah, it'll complement the stuffing. 269 00:09:06,170 --> 00:09:07,307 If we hustle, we can do it. 270 00:09:07,374 --> 00:09:09,113 Okay, I'm gonna need you to shift from 271 00:09:09,146 --> 00:09:10,917 sweet potato casserole duty to brussels sprouts. 272 00:09:10,984 --> 00:09:13,492 Whoa, whoa, whoa. I'm Captain Casserole. 273 00:09:13,559 --> 00:09:14,596 I took an oath. 274 00:09:14,663 --> 00:09:16,869 ‐I need you to wash these. ‐Feels like a demotion. 275 00:09:16,935 --> 00:09:18,307 Really get in there, and‐and hurry. 276 00:09:18,407 --> 00:09:19,343 How's it going in here? 277 00:09:19,410 --> 00:09:20,914 ‐LOUISE: Eh. ‐BOB: Going great. 278 00:09:20,981 --> 00:09:23,288 Welcome to the Almost OMG Mall Group 279 00:09:23,388 --> 00:09:24,659 Thanksgiving Day Parade. 280 00:09:24,759 --> 00:09:26,665 We've got a hell of a show for you today. 281 00:09:26,765 --> 00:09:28,571 Let's go to Tina, who's on the parade route. Tina? 282 00:09:28,638 --> 00:09:31,412 Thank you. I'm here with a very special person, Ruth. 283 00:09:31,479 --> 00:09:33,686 Ruth, where did you travel from today? 284 00:09:33,753 --> 00:09:35,625 ‐Room 3. ‐Wow. 285 00:09:35,726 --> 00:09:36,962 And you, Zeke's grandma? 286 00:09:37,062 --> 00:09:39,136 ‐Room 9. ‐That's so far. 287 00:09:39,203 --> 00:09:41,175 Gene, tell me where the parade's gonna go today. 288 00:09:41,242 --> 00:09:42,980 Well, we're gonna start over here by the bookcase. 289 00:09:43,047 --> 00:09:45,287 We're gonna run around the room, and then we're gonna stop. 290 00:09:45,354 --> 00:09:47,127 It should take about three hours. 291 00:09:47,193 --> 00:09:49,433 Good news. The cream of tartar was just hiding, 292 00:09:49,500 --> 00:09:51,472 so we can make biscuits from scratch. 293 00:09:51,607 --> 00:09:53,178 ‐How's the chopping coming? ‐Pretty good. 294 00:09:53,245 --> 00:09:55,083 You got to line 'em up just so, 295 00:09:55,184 --> 00:09:56,889 and then... hi‐ya! 296 00:09:56,955 --> 00:09:58,460 ‐Oh. ‐That's the best one so far. 297 00:09:58,528 --> 00:10:00,299 Oh, my God. Those should really be in the oven. 298 00:10:00,366 --> 00:10:02,573 ‐Here, let me take that. ‐Hey, I was just... 299 00:10:02,640 --> 00:10:04,077 You don't say "hi‐ya" at all? 300 00:10:04,178 --> 00:10:05,381 Uh, you know what? 301 00:10:05,481 --> 00:10:06,819 Louise, why don't I chop the rest of these? 302 00:10:06,885 --> 00:10:08,390 We can use a couple of the ones you chopped. 303 00:10:08,490 --> 00:10:10,329 ‐(sighs) ‐Crap. I gotta preheat the oven. 304 00:10:10,396 --> 00:10:12,402 Louise, watch out. Sorry, I need to get through. 305 00:10:12,503 --> 00:10:14,374 ‐And there's Thankszilla. ‐What? Huh? 306 00:10:14,475 --> 00:10:17,283 Nothing. I'm just gonna go to the bathroom. 307 00:10:17,383 --> 00:10:19,389 ‐I'll let you know how it goes. ‐Okay, great. 308 00:10:19,423 --> 00:10:21,964 Come out of your room and go join your friends. 309 00:10:22,097 --> 00:10:24,138 I repeat, go join your friends. 310 00:10:24,238 --> 00:10:26,410 I'm not leaving until Gary calls. 311 00:10:26,512 --> 00:10:29,153 Gary, Gary, Gary. Eh, I give up. 312 00:10:29,253 --> 00:10:31,292 What? No, no giving up. 313 00:10:31,392 --> 00:10:33,298 ‐Tell me more about Gary. ‐I'll tell you. 314 00:10:33,398 --> 00:10:35,304 He's a big‐shot tanning salon owner 315 00:10:35,404 --> 00:10:37,143 who won't visit his mother on Thanksgiving 316 00:10:37,243 --> 00:10:39,048 even though he lives ten minutes away! 317 00:10:39,115 --> 00:10:41,054 And he changed his Netflix password. 318 00:10:41,121 --> 00:10:42,492 That's terrible. 319 00:10:42,560 --> 00:10:44,264 Why won't Gary visit you? 320 00:10:44,331 --> 00:10:45,969 Well, this one would tell you 321 00:10:46,036 --> 00:10:47,908 it's because I'm a mean old lady. 322 00:10:48,008 --> 00:10:49,145 What? No. 323 00:10:49,246 --> 00:10:50,917 ‐That's not true. ‐No, it is. 324 00:10:51,017 --> 00:10:52,388 You'd be a mean old lady, too, 325 00:10:52,455 --> 00:10:54,093 if your kids didn't visit you 326 00:10:54,161 --> 00:10:55,364 and you're shivering all the time 327 00:10:55,464 --> 00:10:57,303 because it's freezing in here! 328 00:10:57,370 --> 00:11:00,144 Just wait, Linda. It'll happen to you, too. 329 00:11:00,212 --> 00:11:01,349 No, it won't. 330 00:11:01,415 --> 00:11:03,087 It is chilly in here, though. 331 00:11:03,188 --> 00:11:04,893 Oh, my God, it's already happening! 332 00:11:04,959 --> 00:11:07,032 Oh, Bob, I'm gonna be a grumpy old lady, 333 00:11:07,099 --> 00:11:08,470 and you probably will, too. 334 00:11:08,538 --> 00:11:09,974 What are... what are you talking about? 335 00:11:10,074 --> 00:11:11,212 The kids aren't gonna visit us 336 00:11:11,279 --> 00:11:12,616 when we're in an old folks' home 337 00:11:12,750 --> 00:11:14,254 'cause we'll be grumpy and cold. 338 00:11:14,321 --> 00:11:16,460 Okay, that‐that might not be a today problem. 339 00:11:16,562 --> 00:11:19,203 How are you doing in there? Is Louise helping you? 340 00:11:19,303 --> 00:11:21,677 "Help" is a strong word, but yeah. 341 00:11:21,777 --> 00:11:23,180 I mean, wait a minute. She was. 342 00:11:23,248 --> 00:11:24,418 She might have left. 343 00:11:24,519 --> 00:11:25,655 Oh, my God, see? 344 00:11:25,755 --> 00:11:27,125 They don't want to be with us. 345 00:11:27,227 --> 00:11:28,698 It's already happening. (groans) 346 00:11:28,798 --> 00:11:31,205 She just went to the bathroom, I think. She's coming back. 347 00:11:31,272 --> 00:11:32,475 You're keeping it simple, right, Bob? 348 00:11:32,543 --> 00:11:33,980 You're not going crazy in there? 349 00:11:34,080 --> 00:11:35,552 Simple‐ish. 350 00:11:35,652 --> 00:11:37,691 Bob, if Louise comes back in, take it extra easy with her. 351 00:11:37,791 --> 00:11:39,864 We want our kids to visit us when we live here. 352 00:11:39,931 --> 00:11:41,837 We still can't afford it, but I'll be... 353 00:11:41,937 --> 00:11:44,679 easy like Sunday morning‐‐ you know, Thursday morning. 354 00:11:44,779 --> 00:11:47,287 I'm leaving. I'm gonna go arrest somebody else's mom 355 00:11:47,387 --> 00:11:48,557 and pretend it's you. 356 00:11:48,658 --> 00:11:50,897 Bob, I got to go. Get Louise, but go easy. 357 00:11:50,964 --> 00:11:52,603 All right, I need everyone to imagine 358 00:11:52,670 --> 00:11:54,408 we're Shriners driving tiny cars. 359 00:11:54,509 --> 00:11:55,143 Beep‐beep! 360 00:11:55,244 --> 00:11:57,215 ‐Louise! ‐Uh‐oh. He found me. 361 00:11:57,283 --> 00:11:58,420 ‐Hey, Dad. ‐We're Shrining. 362 00:11:58,521 --> 00:12:00,225 I was totally headed to the kitchen, 363 00:12:00,292 --> 00:12:02,432 but now I got to drive this tiny car. 364 00:12:02,533 --> 00:12:04,572 Yeah, but maybe you can, um, come back. 365 00:12:04,639 --> 00:12:07,581 We'll definitely keep having fun like we were before 366 00:12:07,648 --> 00:12:09,687 and, uh, maybe even more fun. 367 00:12:09,754 --> 00:12:11,893 I mean, I'd love to, but there's that rule 368 00:12:11,994 --> 00:12:15,404 that you can't have less than four Shriners cars in a parade. 369 00:12:15,505 --> 00:12:17,175 Shriners three cannot be. 370 00:12:17,276 --> 00:12:19,917 Just waiting on those other tiny cars. (chuckles) 371 00:12:20,018 --> 00:12:21,054 TINA: Here I come. 372 00:12:21,154 --> 00:12:22,960 Look at all these smiling faces. 373 00:12:23,060 --> 00:12:24,230 I‐I‐I got to go. 374 00:12:24,331 --> 00:12:25,835 Also, you got to go, 375 00:12:25,902 --> 00:12:28,978 because there's a lot of things unwatched right now. 376 00:12:29,078 --> 00:12:30,583 Ugh. Fine. I'm coming. 377 00:12:30,650 --> 00:12:33,358 I don't even know why he wants me in there anyway. 378 00:12:33,425 --> 00:12:35,129 Apparently, I'm not doing anything right. 379 00:12:35,196 --> 00:12:37,336 ‐(Zeke and Tina grunt) ‐Uh‐oh. Shriner pileup. 380 00:12:37,370 --> 00:12:40,345 But if he kicks me out, then I'm free. 381 00:12:40,412 --> 00:12:42,385 Yes! I'm going to be such a bad cook 382 00:12:42,452 --> 00:12:45,695 that Thankszilla will banish me from Kitchenland in no time. 383 00:12:45,762 --> 00:12:48,504 ‐Ha! ‐Okay, time to Shrine, Gene! 384 00:12:48,604 --> 00:12:50,610 Feel that tiny car energy! 385 00:12:54,689 --> 00:12:55,959 Okay, time to baste the breasts. 386 00:12:56,059 --> 00:12:57,664 Do you want me to leave you guys alone? 387 00:12:57,731 --> 00:12:59,068 It's actually a really important job, Louise. 388 00:12:59,201 --> 00:13:01,007 We use the baster to suck up the juices 389 00:13:01,074 --> 00:13:03,314 and then evenly distribute them like so. 390 00:13:03,381 --> 00:13:05,219 Got it. Let me take a whack at this. 391 00:13:05,320 --> 00:13:06,490 Oh. Okay. 392 00:13:06,591 --> 00:13:08,162 Oh, whoops. (chuckles) Did I get it? 393 00:13:08,262 --> 00:13:11,573 Uh, nope, but I'm easy like Thursday morning. 394 00:13:11,640 --> 00:13:13,846 Oops. Missed the meat completely. 395 00:13:13,946 --> 00:13:16,454 Oh, that must be so frustrating for you. 396 00:13:16,521 --> 00:13:17,891 Why don't you try again? 397 00:13:17,991 --> 00:13:22,104 I'm‐I'm very relaxed about all this cooking stuff. 398 00:13:22,170 --> 00:13:23,207 Okay. 399 00:13:23,273 --> 00:13:24,745 Whoa. Missed again. 400 00:13:24,812 --> 00:13:27,453 Boy, you should need a license for this thing. 401 00:13:27,521 --> 00:13:29,326 Good job. That's done. 402 00:13:29,426 --> 00:13:31,499 Okay, uh, let's, uh, keep going. 403 00:13:31,633 --> 00:13:33,471 Uh, look at all that stuff we're making. 404 00:13:33,606 --> 00:13:35,344 ‐Over there. ‐Oh, great. 405 00:13:35,444 --> 00:13:37,249 Just closing the oven. 406 00:13:37,350 --> 00:13:38,888 Oh, and now I'm being told 407 00:13:38,988 --> 00:13:40,894 some really cool marching band is ready to perform. 408 00:13:40,960 --> 00:13:43,334 ‐Good for them. ‐Two, three, four. 409 00:13:43,434 --> 00:13:44,705 (makes trumpet sounds) 410 00:13:44,772 --> 00:13:46,511 Just imagine the thousands of hours 411 00:13:46,578 --> 00:13:48,551 they must have practiced for this very day. 412 00:13:48,617 --> 00:13:51,392 Are you kidding me? They got a flag waver? 413 00:13:51,458 --> 00:13:52,663 Hot damn. 414 00:13:52,763 --> 00:13:54,769 Wow, if I was watching this, I'd be impressed. 415 00:13:54,835 --> 00:13:56,508 And what the huh? 416 00:13:56,608 --> 00:13:59,315 ‐A gymnastics squad? ‐(both grunting) 417 00:13:59,382 --> 00:14:02,458 All right, how about you stir the cranberry sauce? 418 00:14:02,526 --> 00:14:03,696 I'm gonna use this guy. 419 00:14:03,829 --> 00:14:05,400 This is good for stirring, right? 420 00:14:05,500 --> 00:14:06,638 Nope. Nope. Nope. 421 00:14:06,705 --> 00:14:08,242 Ooh, this one's bigger. 422 00:14:08,308 --> 00:14:09,479 Let's use you. 423 00:14:09,547 --> 00:14:10,984 Uh, that wooden spoon looks like fun. 424 00:14:11,050 --> 00:14:12,990 And now, no parade can be complete 425 00:14:13,023 --> 00:14:15,531 without a song from a hit Broadway musical. 426 00:14:15,632 --> 00:14:17,235 Get ready for some singing! 427 00:14:17,302 --> 00:14:18,841 One, two, three, four! 428 00:14:18,908 --> 00:14:21,917 â™Ș Here we are on Broadway â™Ș 429 00:14:21,983 --> 00:14:25,528 â™Ș It's a street but also a place with musicals â™Ș 430 00:14:25,628 --> 00:14:26,932 â™Ș Like Oklahoma â™Ș 431 00:14:26,998 --> 00:14:29,507 â™Ș That's a state but also a musical â™Ș 432 00:14:29,607 --> 00:14:31,077 â™Ș And Rent, which is a musical â™Ș 433 00:14:31,177 --> 00:14:33,719 â™Ș And also a thing you have to pay â™Ș 434 00:14:33,786 --> 00:14:36,359 ‐â™Ș The end. â™Ș ‐â™Ș Oh, end. â™Ș 435 00:14:36,460 --> 00:14:38,265 (weak cheering) 436 00:14:38,365 --> 00:14:39,570 Oh, God. We bombed. 437 00:14:39,637 --> 00:14:40,840 They're just giving us grandparent claps. 438 00:14:40,907 --> 00:14:42,946 To be fair, we told them this was a parade, 439 00:14:43,046 --> 00:14:44,919 and we didn't have any floats or balloons. 440 00:14:45,019 --> 00:14:46,758 ‐And very little parading. ‐It's true. 441 00:14:46,858 --> 00:14:48,095 They could probably press charges. 442 00:14:48,195 --> 00:14:49,767 (gasps) Floats and balloons. Gosh darn it, 443 00:14:49,867 --> 00:14:51,506 we need to do floats and balloons somehow. 444 00:14:51,573 --> 00:14:52,676 It's Thanksgiving, and we're 445 00:14:52,809 --> 00:14:54,213 supposed to be doing the giving part. 446 00:14:54,313 --> 00:14:56,521 The Garfield balloon himself couldn't have said it better. 447 00:14:56,621 --> 00:14:57,958 Uh, guess what. We're not done. 448 00:14:58,058 --> 00:15:00,833 Actually, this was the finale before the finale. 449 00:15:00,933 --> 00:15:02,539 ‐The pre‐finale. ‐The pre‐nale. 450 00:15:02,639 --> 00:15:05,581 So don't go anywhere. This parade will be right back. 451 00:15:05,682 --> 00:15:06,818 With floats and balloons. 452 00:15:06,851 --> 00:15:07,988 ‐MAN: Oh, okay. ‐WOMAN: All right. 453 00:15:08,055 --> 00:15:09,560 We don't have any of those things. 454 00:15:09,660 --> 00:15:10,963 We're definitely getting sued. 455 00:15:11,064 --> 00:15:13,739 Okay, so just keep stirring the green beans like this 456 00:15:13,806 --> 00:15:15,912 so they don't burn, but also you want 457 00:15:15,978 --> 00:15:18,721 to keep them spread out so they cook evenly. 458 00:15:18,821 --> 00:15:21,462 Got it. So, like this, Papa? 459 00:15:21,529 --> 00:15:22,599 Is this good? 460 00:15:22,699 --> 00:15:24,303 Is this spread out enough? 461 00:15:24,370 --> 00:15:25,339 Mm‐hmm. Kind of. 462 00:15:25,406 --> 00:15:27,078 I hadn't thought of doing it that way. 463 00:15:27,145 --> 00:15:30,221 Just a big pile all the way over to the side. 464 00:15:30,254 --> 00:15:33,163 Oh, that cutting board's gonna fall. Go catch it. 465 00:15:33,230 --> 00:15:36,205 How about we race to where your friends are, huh? 466 00:15:36,272 --> 00:15:38,045 I bet you a dollar I'm faster. 467 00:15:38,111 --> 00:15:39,314 Gary could beat you. 468 00:15:39,381 --> 00:15:40,586 He keeps in shape. 469 00:15:40,686 --> 00:15:42,424 Unlike Mr. Orange Soda over here. 470 00:15:42,491 --> 00:15:43,729 Eats like a five‐year‐old. 471 00:15:43,796 --> 00:15:45,232 ‐(Bosco groans) ‐That's it! 472 00:15:45,299 --> 00:15:49,647 Lillian, stop talking about your precious Gary who isn't here. 473 00:15:49,747 --> 00:15:50,950 Sergeant Bosco is here 474 00:15:51,017 --> 00:15:52,789 visiting you, bringing you flowers. 475 00:15:52,856 --> 00:15:54,528 And you've got friends down the hall somehow, 476 00:15:54,628 --> 00:15:55,898 though it's hard to imagine. 477 00:15:55,965 --> 00:15:57,235 So why don't you spend Thanksgiving 478 00:15:57,335 --> 00:15:59,577 with people who want to spend it with you? 479 00:15:59,677 --> 00:16:00,847 I'm gonna go find my kids. 480 00:16:00,913 --> 00:16:02,117 And the only reason they won't visit me 481 00:16:02,217 --> 00:16:03,589 in a nursing home when I'm old is 482 00:16:03,689 --> 00:16:05,895 'cause I won't be able to afford to live in one. 483 00:16:05,962 --> 00:16:07,265 Happy Thanksgiving. 484 00:16:07,365 --> 00:16:09,371 I don't know where she's getting any of that. 485 00:16:09,438 --> 00:16:10,475 I'm on your side. 486 00:16:10,576 --> 00:16:12,280 Okay, the turkey needs a couple more minutes. 487 00:16:12,347 --> 00:16:14,219 Same with the brussels. And you're holding the pickles 488 00:16:14,253 --> 00:16:16,259 above the mashed potatoes. Uh, I'll just take that. 489 00:16:16,325 --> 00:16:17,931 Yeah, if you don't like flavor. 490 00:16:17,998 --> 00:16:19,837 Looks like some pickle juice might have fallen in. 491 00:16:19,904 --> 00:16:21,107 Hopefully not. 492 00:16:21,140 --> 00:16:22,546 The sweet potato casserole should be ready. 493 00:16:22,646 --> 00:16:24,618 And now it's time to brown the marshmallows. 494 00:16:24,718 --> 00:16:25,721 Oh, yes! 495 00:16:25,822 --> 00:16:27,527 The fire gun. Let's do this. 496 00:16:27,594 --> 00:16:29,364 Captain Casserole reporting for duty. 497 00:16:29,464 --> 00:16:32,073 Oh, uh, it's just that we only get one shot at this, Louise, 498 00:16:32,140 --> 00:16:33,912 and if we don't get it right, it's ruined, 499 00:16:33,979 --> 00:16:35,885 so I‐I'd better just do it. 500 00:16:35,985 --> 00:16:37,858 And also, you know, it's not that fun. 501 00:16:37,924 --> 00:16:39,697 What? No, I can be really careful! 502 00:16:39,797 --> 00:16:42,873 Dad, come on. I was being bad at cooking on purpose. 503 00:16:42,939 --> 00:16:44,343 Let me do it, please. 504 00:16:44,409 --> 00:16:46,985 You‐you... you were being bad on purpose? 505 00:16:47,085 --> 00:16:49,091 Yes. So you would kick me out. 506 00:16:49,157 --> 00:16:50,461 You wanted me to kick you out? 507 00:16:50,530 --> 00:16:53,203 Yeah. I did before, but now I don't. 508 00:16:53,303 --> 00:16:54,206 Why would you do that? 509 00:16:54,373 --> 00:16:56,513 Let's talk about it after you give me that thing. 510 00:16:56,614 --> 00:16:57,751 No, definitely not. 511 00:16:57,851 --> 00:16:59,087 ‐I'm doing this. ‐(yells in frustration) 512 00:16:59,187 --> 00:17:00,860 Since you don't want to be here so badly 513 00:17:00,960 --> 00:17:04,136 that you'd purposely mess up the most beautiful meal of the year. 514 00:17:04,169 --> 00:17:06,510 ‐None of us wanted to be in here. ‐What? 515 00:17:06,611 --> 00:17:08,081 The only reason I'm here at all is because 516 00:17:08,114 --> 00:17:09,653 I had the softest hand fart. 517 00:17:09,753 --> 00:17:11,057 I‐I don't know what that means, 518 00:17:11,090 --> 00:17:12,293 but I'm just gonna finish everything else myself. 519 00:17:12,360 --> 00:17:14,166 Fine! That's clearly how you wanted it 520 00:17:14,232 --> 00:17:16,506 from the beginning, you Thankszilla. 521 00:17:16,641 --> 00:17:19,081 ‐Bye. Bye! ‐Bye. 522 00:17:19,850 --> 00:17:21,354 I imagined that door slamming. 523 00:17:21,420 --> 00:17:23,393 I'm just gonna say it. Slam! 524 00:17:27,807 --> 00:17:29,244 This is beautiful. You kids. 525 00:17:29,344 --> 00:17:31,183 Uh, don't blow your nose on the toilet paper. 526 00:17:31,250 --> 00:17:32,822 ‐We need it for the float. ‐Oh. 527 00:17:32,922 --> 00:17:34,159 This is supposed to be a float? 528 00:17:34,259 --> 00:17:35,631 If you really squint and then shut your eyes. 529 00:17:35,731 --> 00:17:38,038 Louise, you're not helping in the kitchen? 530 00:17:38,138 --> 00:17:39,810 Nope. I'm back. What are we doing? 531 00:17:39,877 --> 00:17:41,447 We're aiming for the moon is what we're doing. 532 00:17:41,515 --> 00:17:44,256 Or at least to get that one guy to stop snoring at us. 533 00:17:44,323 --> 00:17:46,530 Hi, turkey. It's just me in here now. 534 00:17:46,664 --> 00:17:49,471 God, you're even more beautiful than you were five minutes ago. 535 00:17:49,539 --> 00:17:51,444 (in high‐pitched voice): Yeah, because you cooked me perfectly 536 00:17:51,545 --> 00:17:53,952 and you're a great chef and a great father 537 00:17:54,019 --> 00:17:56,058 and also unconventionally handsome. 538 00:17:56,125 --> 00:17:58,566 (in normal voice): Thanks. Uh, you didn't have to say all that. 539 00:17:58,633 --> 00:18:00,906 (in burly voice): Hey, I wasn't even gonna be a dish, 540 00:18:00,973 --> 00:18:02,679 and now look at me. Thank you. 541 00:18:02,712 --> 00:18:04,785 (in normal voice): You're welcome, brussels sprouts. 542 00:18:04,852 --> 00:18:07,827 I do very much enjoy cooking Thanksgiving dinner. 543 00:18:07,927 --> 00:18:09,331 (in childlike voice): And you're so good at it. 544 00:18:09,431 --> 00:18:10,836 (in normal voice): Thanks, green beans. 545 00:18:10,903 --> 00:18:12,340 But honestly, I‐I might not be 546 00:18:12,440 --> 00:18:16,252 the easiest to be around in the kitchen on T‐Day. 547 00:18:16,352 --> 00:18:17,690 (in high‐pitched voice): Are you kidding? 548 00:18:17,757 --> 00:18:20,097 I love being in the kitchen with you on T‐Day, Bob. 549 00:18:20,164 --> 00:18:21,535 And I love calling it T‐Day. 550 00:18:21,601 --> 00:18:23,273 (in normal voice): I‐I don't know, mashed potatoes. 551 00:18:23,373 --> 00:18:25,079 I feel like maybe you guys are just kind of 552 00:18:25,179 --> 00:18:26,550 telling me what I want to hear. 553 00:18:26,617 --> 00:18:28,421 (in Southern accent): No, we love you. You're the best. 554 00:18:28,488 --> 00:18:31,097 Leave your family, Bob. We'll run away together. 555 00:18:31,197 --> 00:18:33,002 (in normal accent): I mean, that might be nice 556 00:18:33,103 --> 00:18:34,473 for a little while, stuffing, 557 00:18:34,574 --> 00:18:36,914 but I don't want to run away with food. 558 00:18:37,014 --> 00:18:39,790 (in high‐pitched voice): You should. We could make you happy, Bob. 559 00:18:39,857 --> 00:18:41,227 (in normal voice): This is getting weird. 560 00:18:41,327 --> 00:18:42,699 I‐I think I'd better go talk to Louise. 561 00:18:42,799 --> 00:18:44,469 I'm just gonna put some foil over you guys real quick. 562 00:18:44,537 --> 00:18:46,075 (in high‐pitched voice): No, no, no! 563 00:18:46,142 --> 00:18:47,680 (in normal voice): Shh. No, it's okay. 564 00:18:47,714 --> 00:18:49,317 You guys need to stay warm. (screams in high‐pitched voice) 565 00:18:49,417 --> 00:18:51,157 Is this collection of inflated rubber gloves 566 00:18:51,290 --> 00:18:53,062 the best parade balloon ever? 567 00:18:53,129 --> 00:18:55,102 No, but is it a parade balloon? 568 00:18:55,169 --> 00:18:56,472 ‐Probably. ‐Hi, guys. 569 00:18:56,573 --> 00:18:59,181 ‐Louise, can we talk? ‐Sorry, we're busy. 570 00:18:59,281 --> 00:19:01,454 ‐Just for a sec. ‐Uh, I'm in the float zone, Dad, 571 00:19:01,521 --> 00:19:04,396 so unless you're a float or a balloon, I don't see you. 572 00:19:04,429 --> 00:19:06,368 Can't tell. Can't tell if we got there, 573 00:19:06,435 --> 00:19:08,810 but gosh darn it, it's too late to stop now, 574 00:19:08,877 --> 00:19:10,113 'cause we're rolling! 575 00:19:10,180 --> 00:19:11,585 Bye, Dad. Hee‐yah! 576 00:19:11,719 --> 00:19:14,392 How about a totally sincere round of applause for the float? 577 00:19:14,459 --> 00:19:17,536 The theme is: a mountain of medical supplies. 578 00:19:17,636 --> 00:19:20,010 Look at all the things they got on that thing. 579 00:19:20,077 --> 00:19:21,280 (murmuring) 580 00:19:21,347 --> 00:19:22,584 And how about these glove balloons, huh? 581 00:19:22,651 --> 00:19:24,422 Eat your heart out, giant Snoopy. 582 00:19:24,524 --> 00:19:26,362 I'm still light‐headed from blowing these up. 583 00:19:26,495 --> 00:19:29,037 Oh, so full of air, those balloons. 584 00:19:29,104 --> 00:19:31,913 Uh, and I'm another balloon. 585 00:19:31,979 --> 00:19:33,316 Do what? 586 00:19:33,383 --> 00:19:35,189 What's that balloon supposed to be? 587 00:19:35,289 --> 00:19:37,328 ‐Oh, um... ‐Ignore him. 588 00:19:37,395 --> 00:19:39,703 He's not really in the parade. He's the chef. 589 00:19:39,770 --> 00:19:41,440 The mean chef who works alone. 590 00:19:41,508 --> 00:19:44,785 Um, my balloon is a‐a character named... 591 00:19:44,851 --> 00:19:46,121 Sorry, Louise. 592 00:19:46,222 --> 00:19:47,961 Sorry Louise? Is that Pixar? 593 00:19:48,061 --> 00:19:49,397 What the hell is this? 594 00:19:49,497 --> 00:19:51,237 Aw, Lillian, you left your room. 595 00:19:51,303 --> 00:19:52,473 Kind of regret it now. 596 00:19:52,541 --> 00:19:54,145 ‐Hey, Lillian. ‐Hi, Ernie. 597 00:19:54,212 --> 00:19:55,382 What's this crap show? 598 00:19:55,482 --> 00:19:58,057 The TV's broken, and then I had a great nap. 599 00:19:58,157 --> 00:19:59,227 Louise, hey. 600 00:19:59,261 --> 00:20:00,665 I‐I really want to say something. 601 00:20:00,733 --> 00:20:03,172 Uh, I'm sorry I was a little bit of a Thankszilla. 602 00:20:03,239 --> 00:20:05,412 I really did want you to be in the kitchen with me 603 00:20:05,546 --> 00:20:07,586 and maybe even to teach you a few things. 604 00:20:07,686 --> 00:20:10,027 You know, I pictured us bustling around in there, 605 00:20:10,093 --> 00:20:11,665 high‐fiving with spatulas, 606 00:20:11,732 --> 00:20:15,375 but I was way too much of a cook and not enough of a dad. 607 00:20:15,442 --> 00:20:19,321 (sighs) Well, I guess I was kind of a jerk, too. 608 00:20:19,421 --> 00:20:21,193 Sorry. For what it's worth, 609 00:20:21,260 --> 00:20:24,369 every other day of the year, you're a pretty great dad. 610 00:20:24,469 --> 00:20:26,275 Though you're kind of a monster on Easter, too. 611 00:20:26,342 --> 00:20:27,579 And Russian May Day. 612 00:20:27,679 --> 00:20:29,284 Do parades normally talk this much? 613 00:20:29,384 --> 00:20:32,460 Let's give it up for the Sorry Louise balloon over here. 614 00:20:32,561 --> 00:20:34,366 Late entry. Crowd favorite. 615 00:20:34,432 --> 00:20:36,005 ‐Wow. ‐(murmuring) 616 00:20:36,071 --> 00:20:37,643 What an amazing parade. You loved it. 617 00:20:37,744 --> 00:20:39,515 We gave back. It counts. You're welcome. 618 00:20:39,582 --> 00:20:42,223 Uh‐oh, the wind's blowing this balloon off course. 619 00:20:42,323 --> 00:20:43,727 Look out. 620 00:20:43,795 --> 00:20:47,238 Oh, I was wondering where all the medical supplies went. 621 00:20:47,338 --> 00:20:50,247 (pleased murmuring) 622 00:20:50,347 --> 00:20:52,086 God, I freaking love Thanksgiving. 623 00:20:52,186 --> 00:20:53,322 Aw. 624 00:20:53,389 --> 00:20:54,627 Hey, Louise, there's one more thing 625 00:20:54,694 --> 00:20:56,098 I need your help with in the kitchen. 626 00:20:56,165 --> 00:20:57,134 What's that? 627 00:20:57,234 --> 00:20:58,438 (yelling) 628 00:20:58,539 --> 00:20:59,976 Captain Casserole! 629 00:21:00,043 --> 00:21:01,614 Woo‐hoo‐hoo! 630 00:21:01,681 --> 00:21:04,791 â™Ș Captain Casserole flings her fiery fire flame â™Ș 631 00:21:04,891 --> 00:21:08,134 â™Ș And makes other kitchen helpers look so lame â™Ș 632 00:21:08,234 --> 00:21:11,043 â™Ș With her million‐degree super butane torch â™Ș 633 00:21:11,110 --> 00:21:13,617 â™Ș All marshmallows will soon be scorched â™Ș 634 00:21:13,684 --> 00:21:17,830 â™Ș After Captain Casserole flings her fiery flame â™Ș 635 00:21:17,930 --> 00:21:21,541 â™Ș Captain Casserole flings her fiery fire flame â™Ș 636 00:21:21,608 --> 00:21:24,985 â™Ș Every single marshmallow will be maimed â™Ș 637 00:21:25,051 --> 00:21:27,425 â™Ș With a thousand degrees of butane blast â™Ș 638 00:21:27,491 --> 00:21:28,897 â™Ș She'll knock marshmallows â™Ș 639 00:21:28,997 --> 00:21:30,869 ‐â™Ș Right on their â™Ș ‐(makes whooshing sound) 640 00:21:30,969 --> 00:21:32,641 â™Ș After Captain Casserole flings her fiery flame. â™Ș 641 00:21:32,741 --> 00:21:33,476 Captioning sponsored by BENTO BOX ENTERTAINMENT 642 00:21:33,610 --> 00:21:35,115 and TOYOTA. 643 00:21:35,215 --> 00:21:36,954 Captioned by Media Access Group at WGBH access.wgbh.org 644 00:21:37,004 --> 00:21:41,554 Repair and Synchronization by Easy Subtitles Synchronizer 1.0.0.0 49965

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