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1
00:00:01,802 --> 00:00:03,572
(Crow caws)
2
00:00:03,604 --> 00:00:05,314
(Toast crunching)
3
00:00:05,339 --> 00:00:07,279
(Door opens)
4
00:00:09,743 --> 00:00:12,253
- Kids, it happens to be
our anniversary today,
5
00:00:12,280 --> 00:00:13,610
so it might be a nice idea
if you wished your mother
6
00:00:13,647 --> 00:00:15,217
a happy anniversary.
7
00:00:15,249 --> 00:00:17,189
- Okay, um...
8
00:00:17,218 --> 00:00:19,318
What would you like us to say?
9
00:00:19,353 --> 00:00:20,623
- Well, you could start
by saying,
10
00:00:20,654 --> 00:00:22,694
"happy anniversary."
11
00:00:22,723 --> 00:00:24,433
- Mmm, okay, but why
are we wishing her
12
00:00:24,458 --> 00:00:26,058
a happy anniversary?
13
00:00:26,094 --> 00:00:27,264
Isn't that something
that you two
14
00:00:27,295 --> 00:00:28,495
are supposed to say
to each other?
15
00:00:28,529 --> 00:00:30,459
- Yeah, it's called being
courteous, honey.
16
00:00:30,498 --> 00:00:32,428
You know, the Bloomfield kids
used to throw their parents
17
00:00:32,466 --> 00:00:33,726
an anniversary party
every year.
18
00:00:33,767 --> 00:00:36,137
- Mhmm... um,
if we're truth telling,
19
00:00:36,170 --> 00:00:37,770
the Bloomfields were always
a little too friendly
20
00:00:37,805 --> 00:00:39,235
with one another.
21
00:00:39,273 --> 00:00:40,513
I just don't understand
what kind of family
22
00:00:40,541 --> 00:00:42,441
skinny dips together.
23
00:00:42,476 --> 00:00:44,246
- John, are you ready?
24
00:00:44,278 --> 00:00:45,408
- Yes, sweetheart.
25
00:00:45,446 --> 00:00:47,216
- Happy anniversary!
26
00:00:47,248 --> 00:00:49,478
- Congratulations on your
ongoing love for one another.
27
00:00:49,517 --> 00:00:51,287
You did it!
28
00:00:51,319 --> 00:00:52,689
- Okay kids, that's enough.
29
00:00:52,720 --> 00:00:54,760
You sound like the incestuous
Bloomfields.
30
00:00:54,788 --> 00:00:56,158
- Have a blessed day.
31
00:00:58,859 --> 00:01:02,399
*
32
00:01:04,698 --> 00:01:06,728
- Ahem! Hello there, Roses.
33
00:01:06,767 --> 00:01:07,667
- Hello there, you!
- Yes...
34
00:01:07,701 --> 00:01:09,341
- May we join you?
35
00:01:09,370 --> 00:01:11,570
- Oh, we just ordered to go.
- Yeah, we're not staying,
36
00:01:11,605 --> 00:01:13,205
we've got a million
things to do.
37
00:01:13,241 --> 00:01:14,741
- Oh, well then,
I guess you don't want
38
00:01:14,775 --> 00:01:16,435
your present then, huh?
39
00:01:16,477 --> 00:01:18,547
(Laughs)
40
00:01:18,579 --> 00:01:19,709
You wanna guess what
your present is?
41
00:01:19,747 --> 00:01:22,547
- No, I do not.
- Dinner!
42
00:01:22,583 --> 00:01:24,693
- We're gifting you a dinner!
43
00:01:24,718 --> 00:01:27,718
- At the most exclusive eatery
in Elmdale.
44
00:01:27,755 --> 00:01:29,555
- Oh.
- It's very hard to get
a table.
45
00:01:29,590 --> 00:01:31,590
But uh, I pulled a few strings.
46
00:01:31,625 --> 00:01:34,625
That sounds too good to--
What's the catch?
47
00:01:34,662 --> 00:01:35,702
- No, there's-there's no catch,
48
00:01:35,729 --> 00:01:38,469
Just every new council member
gets a dinner, so.
49
00:01:38,499 --> 00:01:40,899
- Oh, how very civilized.
50
00:01:40,934 --> 00:01:44,274
- It is... thank you, Roland.
We accept.
51
00:01:44,305 --> 00:01:45,835
- Terrific, so we'll pick
you up around seven.
52
00:01:45,873 --> 00:01:48,283
- We?
- Yeah, we have a coupon.
53
00:01:48,309 --> 00:01:49,839
Four entrees for the price
of three,
54
00:01:49,877 --> 00:01:51,747
it expires soon, though.
55
00:01:51,779 --> 00:01:53,579
It should be really fun,
you guys.
56
00:01:53,614 --> 00:01:56,324
- Yes, it will be fun...
57
00:01:56,350 --> 00:01:57,550
- Well, it would be fun,
58
00:01:57,585 --> 00:01:59,785
if today were not
our anniversary.
59
00:01:59,820 --> 00:02:02,320
- Yeah...
- Wow, happy anniversary!
60
00:02:02,356 --> 00:02:04,256
- Well, thank you,
thank you.
61
00:02:04,292 --> 00:02:05,862
- You two are obviously
gonna want to spend tonight
62
00:02:05,893 --> 00:02:07,933
just the two of you, so--
63
00:02:07,961 --> 00:02:09,901
- Yes, that was the plan.
JOCELYN: Yeah.
64
00:02:09,930 --> 00:02:11,530
- Oh, well you know,
the coupon expires
65
00:02:11,565 --> 00:02:12,865
in three weeks, so...
66
00:02:12,900 --> 00:02:14,540
- Okay, all right, let it go.
67
00:02:14,568 --> 00:02:16,268
- You have fun, you guys!
68
00:02:16,304 --> 00:02:17,514
- Okay.
- Okay?
69
00:02:17,538 --> 00:02:20,608
- Bye bye, now.
- Bye!
70
00:02:20,641 --> 00:02:22,541
- Boy, that was a close call.
71
00:02:22,576 --> 00:02:23,806
(Bell on door jangles)
72
00:02:28,782 --> 00:02:31,652
- What are you doing with that?
73
00:02:31,685 --> 00:02:33,415
- With what, this yearbook?
74
00:02:33,454 --> 00:02:36,194
- Could you put it back,
please?!
75
00:02:36,224 --> 00:02:37,694
- Why would I put it back,
76
00:02:37,725 --> 00:02:39,655
when Stevie Budd was voted:
77
00:02:39,693 --> 00:02:42,503
"Most likely to get the guy."
78
00:02:42,530 --> 00:02:44,370
With that hair cut?!
79
00:02:44,398 --> 00:02:46,668
- I'll have you know I was very
popular with the boys.
80
00:02:46,700 --> 00:02:48,570
- And girls, it seems.
81
00:02:48,602 --> 00:02:50,442
- Wow, well, according
to the internet,
82
00:02:50,471 --> 00:02:53,411
you were "Mister Popular."
83
00:02:53,441 --> 00:02:54,781
- I will have you know that
that headshot
84
00:02:54,808 --> 00:02:57,448
got me a two-episode arc
on a TV series.
85
00:02:57,478 --> 00:02:59,278
- What series?
86
00:02:59,313 --> 00:03:00,653
- "Dateline."
87
00:03:00,681 --> 00:03:03,821
I played a boy who got abducted
from a grocery store.
88
00:03:03,851 --> 00:03:05,921
- Wow.
- Yeah.
89
00:03:05,953 --> 00:03:07,093
And the performance
was so riveting,
90
00:03:07,120 --> 00:03:10,320
people thought I actually was
the "Value Mart Victim."
91
00:03:10,358 --> 00:03:12,688
- Hmm, bet that got you laid.
92
00:03:12,726 --> 00:03:16,256
- It did. It really did.
93
00:03:18,866 --> 00:03:20,426
- You know, I am surprised
that you haven't asked me
94
00:03:20,468 --> 00:03:21,968
to leave early today.
95
00:03:22,002 --> 00:03:23,742
- Are you telepathic
or something,
96
00:03:23,771 --> 00:03:25,541
because I have been thinking
about asking you that question
97
00:03:25,573 --> 00:03:27,743
every day this week.
98
00:03:27,775 --> 00:03:30,335
- I was just kidding.
99
00:03:30,378 --> 00:03:33,278
- Oh... no yeah, me too.
100
00:03:33,314 --> 00:03:35,584
- No, just with the big soiree
at Mutt's tonight,
101
00:03:35,616 --> 00:03:38,646
I figured that you would need
ample time to get ready.
102
00:03:38,686 --> 00:03:40,886
- Mutt's having a soiree?
103
00:03:40,921 --> 00:03:42,921
- Well, I'm sure you're invited.
104
00:03:42,956 --> 00:03:45,626
- Yeah, no. Yeah, no,
why wouldn't I be?
105
00:03:45,659 --> 00:03:47,459
Um, were you invited?
106
00:03:47,495 --> 00:03:48,855
- Yeah. Yeah.
107
00:03:48,896 --> 00:03:51,666
I guess it's just-just a bit
of a pride issue,
108
00:03:51,699 --> 00:03:53,769
you know, do I attend the party
hosted by the guy
109
00:03:53,801 --> 00:03:56,471
that you left me for?
110
00:03:56,504 --> 00:03:58,014
- Yeah, no, I'm sure
he wouldn't mind.
111
00:03:58,038 --> 00:04:00,838
- Yeah, but I really would
have to basically throw
112
00:04:00,874 --> 00:04:03,844
all my self-respect just right
out the window.
113
00:04:03,877 --> 00:04:06,007
(Both laugh)
- Aww, that's so sweet.
114
00:04:06,046 --> 00:04:08,376
So um, what time
is the party tonight?
115
00:04:10,784 --> 00:04:12,924
- (Small laugh)
- Happy anniversary, sweetheart.
116
00:04:12,953 --> 00:04:14,763
- Oh darling,
what a sweet gesture,
117
00:04:14,788 --> 00:04:16,358
and a precursor no doubt,
118
00:04:16,390 --> 00:04:18,990
to something more grand planned.
119
00:04:19,593 --> 00:04:21,403
- Something more grand?
120
00:04:21,429 --> 00:04:23,299
- Ah, knowing your penchant
for surprises,
121
00:04:23,331 --> 00:04:27,701
I'm guessing you have something
else up your sleeve.
122
00:04:27,735 --> 00:04:30,565
- Yes, I do.
- Uh oh!
123
00:04:30,604 --> 00:04:32,944
- I do, I...
124
00:04:32,973 --> 00:04:34,743
was going to tell you later,
125
00:04:34,775 --> 00:04:37,675
but I booked a restaurant
in Elmdale,
126
00:04:37,711 --> 00:04:39,781
it's supposed to be very fancy!
127
00:04:39,813 --> 00:04:42,323
- The one that Roland
and Jocelyn just told us about?
128
00:04:42,350 --> 00:04:44,520
- Yes! Yes, but...
129
00:04:44,552 --> 00:04:46,422
who knew they were asking
us tonight!
130
00:04:46,454 --> 00:04:48,094
- Just the two of us?
- Mhmm.
131
00:04:48,121 --> 00:04:50,621
- Sort of a "Lady and the
Tramp" meets "9 1/2 Weeks"
132
00:04:50,658 --> 00:04:52,528
kind of dinner date?
133
00:04:52,560 --> 00:04:54,460
- Could for one second believe
that I would not
134
00:04:54,495 --> 00:04:56,955
have planned something...
for our anniversary?
135
00:04:56,997 --> 00:04:58,497
Tonight?
136
00:04:59,867 --> 00:05:01,567
The two of us?
137
00:05:03,637 --> 00:05:07,337
*
138
00:05:07,375 --> 00:05:09,505
(Soft classical music plays)
139
00:05:11,712 --> 00:05:14,112
- Hi, Rose, party of two.
140
00:05:14,147 --> 00:05:15,717
- Yeah, we spoke on the phone
this afternoon.
141
00:05:15,749 --> 00:05:17,889
You're lucky we had
that cancellation.
142
00:05:17,918 --> 00:05:19,518
- Yes, well, lucky for someone.
143
00:05:19,553 --> 00:05:22,763
We had a reservation which
I of course made uh,
144
00:05:22,790 --> 00:05:24,890
weeks ago.
145
00:05:24,925 --> 00:05:26,125
- You always could swing
a good table
146
00:05:26,159 --> 00:05:29,029
at the last minute, John.
147
00:05:29,062 --> 00:05:30,362
- Okay, it'll just be
a few minutes.
148
00:05:30,398 --> 00:05:31,968
- Thank you.
- Okay.
149
00:05:31,999 --> 00:05:33,999
- Moira?
150
00:05:34,034 --> 00:05:35,504
- Bev?
- Don!
151
00:05:35,536 --> 00:05:36,866
- Moira!
- Bev!
152
00:05:36,904 --> 00:05:38,514
- Oh my God, the Roses!
You're alive!
153
00:05:38,539 --> 00:05:40,369
MOIRA: Ohhhh!
JOHNNY: Oh my gosh!
154
00:05:40,408 --> 00:05:43,408
Good to see you!
- Wow! What? Don?
155
00:05:43,444 --> 00:05:45,714
DON: Oh, I don't believe it!
MOIRA: Come on, Don!
156
00:05:45,746 --> 00:05:47,076
BEV: Muah! Muah!
157
00:05:47,114 --> 00:05:48,724
- What are you two doing here?
158
00:05:48,749 --> 00:05:50,119
- Well, we were dropping
Mackenzie off at college,
159
00:05:50,150 --> 00:05:51,820
and decided we'd take
the scenic route home.
160
00:05:51,852 --> 00:05:54,392
- You must-they should-
you must join us!
161
00:05:54,422 --> 00:05:55,922
- Join us for dinner!
162
00:05:55,956 --> 00:05:57,056
BEV: Well- oh, yes!
DON: That would be great!
163
00:05:57,090 --> 00:06:00,730
- We are just dying to find out
what you've been up to!
164
00:06:00,761 --> 00:06:02,701
- We're dying to tell you!
165
00:06:02,730 --> 00:06:03,960
(All laugh)
BEV: Okay.
166
00:06:03,997 --> 00:06:05,767
ALL: Ohhh...
167
00:06:07,901 --> 00:06:10,941
(Loud, upbeat rock song plays)
168
00:06:10,971 --> 00:06:13,071
* I set your world on fire!
169
00:06:13,106 --> 00:06:14,476
(Bottles clink)
170
00:06:14,508 --> 00:06:16,478
* Come on, let's go
171
00:06:16,510 --> 00:06:18,780
* Come on, let's go
172
00:06:18,812 --> 00:06:20,552
- Oh, I wouldn't do that
if I were you.
173
00:06:20,581 --> 00:06:21,981
- Oh, I wouldn't either,
174
00:06:22,015 --> 00:06:23,675
but I couldn't find
a cocktail shaker,
175
00:06:23,717 --> 00:06:25,547
and someone brought room
temperature vodka.
176
00:06:25,586 --> 00:06:29,586
- N-No, I mean Mutt made those
ice cubes from well water,
177
00:06:29,623 --> 00:06:31,963
so they smell a little fishy.
178
00:06:31,992 --> 00:06:33,732
- Oh.
179
00:06:33,761 --> 00:06:35,201
Yeah, wouldn't want that
melting in my drink,
180
00:06:35,228 --> 00:06:36,698
thank you very much.
181
00:06:36,730 --> 00:06:39,530
- I'm Jake.
- David.
182
00:06:39,567 --> 00:06:40,967
- It's nice to meet you,
handsome.
183
00:06:46,740 --> 00:06:49,580
- I-I'll-I'm gonna--
so I'll just...
184
00:06:53,681 --> 00:06:54,721
Wow! Look at you.
185
00:06:56,517 --> 00:06:58,147
- What's that supposed to mean?
186
00:06:58,185 --> 00:07:00,715
- No, I've just never seen you
this dressed up before.
187
00:07:00,754 --> 00:07:02,594
- I do what I want.
188
00:07:02,623 --> 00:07:05,063
And tonight, I'm wanting
to meet someone.
189
00:07:05,092 --> 00:07:06,692
- Hmm.
190
00:07:06,727 --> 00:07:08,057
- So, I have a certain
high school reputation
191
00:07:08,095 --> 00:07:09,625
I need to live up to.
192
00:07:09,663 --> 00:07:11,163
- Uh huh, yeah,
and good luck with that.
193
00:07:11,198 --> 00:07:13,628
- Um, speaking of sexual
popularity,
194
00:07:13,667 --> 00:07:16,497
I'm pretty sure that um...
195
00:07:16,537 --> 00:07:18,737
that guy at the bar,
is into me.
196
00:07:21,241 --> 00:07:24,481
- Who, Jake?
- Yeah. Jake.
197
00:07:24,512 --> 00:07:28,482
Why, was he one of your
high school conquests?
198
00:07:28,516 --> 00:07:30,476
- Actually, no.
199
00:07:30,518 --> 00:07:32,618
But I have a pretty stellar
radar for being able to tell
200
00:07:32,653 --> 00:07:33,993
when guys are into me.
201
00:07:34,021 --> 00:07:38,261
- Mhmm... um, and having
swam in both ponds,
202
00:07:38,291 --> 00:07:40,831
I can say that I might be able
to navigate those waters
203
00:07:40,861 --> 00:07:42,801
a little but better than you.
204
00:07:42,830 --> 00:07:45,670
- Uh huh? Well, we'll see.
205
00:07:45,699 --> 00:07:47,229
- Hmm.
206
00:07:47,267 --> 00:07:54,877
*
207
00:07:58,111 --> 00:08:00,551
(Soft classical music plays)
208
00:08:00,581 --> 00:08:03,221
- So-so there we are at Izzy
Tennison's country home--
209
00:08:03,250 --> 00:08:05,190
MOIRA: Oh, tell me she doesn't
still have that stuffed bison.
210
00:08:05,218 --> 00:08:06,718
- Oh, does she have it?
211
00:08:06,754 --> 00:08:09,264
She's moved it
to the front hall!
212
00:08:09,289 --> 00:08:11,219
- What?!
- Grier wanted to hang
her coat on the horns!
213
00:08:11,258 --> 00:08:13,658
(All laugh)
214
00:08:13,694 --> 00:08:15,934
- And it gets better. Don here--
215
00:08:15,963 --> 00:08:16,763
- Oh, wait now,
don't throw me under the bus,
216
00:08:16,797 --> 00:08:18,297
it was Borden
who started it all.
217
00:08:18,331 --> 00:08:20,001
- Borden Simons?
218
00:08:20,033 --> 00:08:21,803
It's like old home week!
219
00:08:21,835 --> 00:08:25,105
- Anyway, I look over,
220
00:08:25,138 --> 00:08:27,908
and Don and Borden
are on their hands and knees,
221
00:08:27,941 --> 00:08:30,911
crawling through the doggie
door in the kitchen!
222
00:08:30,944 --> 00:08:34,314
It was too funny!
(All laugh uproariously)
223
00:08:34,347 --> 00:08:37,147
- Oh, you should've been there.
- Oh, wish we could've been.
224
00:08:37,184 --> 00:08:39,194
- Maybe next time.
- Well, cheers to that!
225
00:08:39,219 --> 00:08:40,789
ALL: Cheers.
226
00:08:40,821 --> 00:08:43,021
(Glasses clink)
227
00:08:43,056 --> 00:08:45,886
- Hey uh... Johnny? Moira?
228
00:08:45,926 --> 00:08:47,326
- Oh my God!
229
00:08:47,360 --> 00:08:49,900
- Um, what are you guys
doing here?
230
00:08:49,930 --> 00:08:53,070
- Well, we-we just
ran into each other.
231
00:08:53,100 --> 00:08:54,600
JOCELYN: It's their
anniversary, Roland,
232
00:08:54,635 --> 00:08:55,835
just let them do
what they want.
233
00:08:55,869 --> 00:08:57,139
- It's your anniversary?
You should've told us!
234
00:08:57,170 --> 00:08:58,310
We don't want to intrude.
235
00:08:58,338 --> 00:09:01,138
MOIRA: No, you're not intruding,
this is a surprise treat.
236
00:09:01,174 --> 00:09:04,684
- Oh, okay, well then,
are we intruding?
237
00:09:04,712 --> 00:09:05,912
Because before you were saying
238
00:09:05,946 --> 00:09:08,676
that you didn't wanna go
out tonight, so...
239
00:09:08,716 --> 00:09:11,746
- No, no, we-we uh...
You can certainly join us,
240
00:09:11,785 --> 00:09:14,045
if you don't have your own
table.
241
00:09:14,087 --> 00:09:15,887
- We do, but that
would be great!
242
00:09:15,923 --> 00:09:18,293
- Okay!
- Yes, well then, by all means,
243
00:09:18,325 --> 00:09:22,195
yes, let's uh- let's...
let's all sit at one table.
244
00:09:22,229 --> 00:09:23,599
BEV: This is cozy. Hello.
JOCELYN: Hi.
245
00:09:23,631 --> 00:09:25,801
BEV: Good evening.
246
00:09:25,833 --> 00:09:27,773
("Learn To Love" by W. Darling)
247
00:09:27,801 --> 00:09:31,711
* You can stand with a shield
at your side *
248
00:09:31,739 --> 00:09:35,739
* Never breaking protecting
your pride *
249
00:09:35,776 --> 00:09:37,946
* But you can't really win
250
00:09:37,978 --> 00:09:40,648
* If you've nothing to lose
251
00:09:40,681 --> 00:09:43,351
- Wow. Look at you.
252
00:09:43,383 --> 00:09:45,053
- Is it weird that I'm here?
253
00:09:45,085 --> 00:09:46,215
- It's only weird if you think
it's weird.
254
00:09:46,253 --> 00:09:48,693
- Yeah. Okay.
I don't if you don't.
255
00:09:48,722 --> 00:09:50,822
Um, in fact, I don't actually
know how late I can stay.
256
00:09:50,858 --> 00:09:54,358
I just wanted to pop in,
and say hey.
257
00:09:54,394 --> 00:09:56,864
- Well, you're awfully
dolled up for a "pop in."
258
00:09:56,897 --> 00:10:00,127
- (Laughs) Oh my God, stop,
I basically came from work.
259
00:10:00,167 --> 00:10:02,197
- Babe, your stove's
being testy again,
260
00:10:02,235 --> 00:10:03,765
should I just serve
the cider cold?
261
00:10:03,804 --> 00:10:08,414
- Uh... Alexis,
this is uh, my girlfriend,
262
00:10:08,441 --> 00:10:11,751
Tennessee.
- Wow!
263
00:10:11,779 --> 00:10:13,379
Wow. Woweee.
264
00:10:13,413 --> 00:10:15,353
(Laughs)
- Alexis, hi.
265
00:10:15,382 --> 00:10:16,922
It's so nice to finally
meet you,
266
00:10:16,950 --> 00:10:18,820
Mutt's told me so much
about you.
267
00:10:18,852 --> 00:10:21,662
The way he describes you,
it's like you're this...
268
00:10:21,689 --> 00:10:23,419
beautiful little poem.
269
00:10:23,456 --> 00:10:25,256
- Well, love "little!"
270
00:10:25,292 --> 00:10:29,032
Look at you!
You're like a poem too.
271
00:10:29,062 --> 00:10:31,732
Like, a really pretty poem,
or like,
272
00:10:31,765 --> 00:10:34,965
a mermaid, or something.
273
00:10:35,002 --> 00:10:36,302
Mutt, you're growing back
your beard.
274
00:10:36,336 --> 00:10:39,036
- Yeah, she likes it.
275
00:10:39,072 --> 00:10:41,012
- Okay.
276
00:10:41,041 --> 00:10:44,981
- Um, okay uh,
I'm gonna go grab a drink.
277
00:10:45,012 --> 00:10:47,252
But um, it was so nice
to finally meet you,
278
00:10:47,280 --> 00:10:48,880
Tallahassee, so...
279
00:10:48,916 --> 00:10:51,216
- It's ah, Tennessee.
- Yes, Tennessee.
280
00:10:51,251 --> 00:10:54,121
I love that name,
it's so unique.
281
00:10:54,154 --> 00:10:55,194
Um, thank God you look
the way you do,
282
00:10:55,222 --> 00:10:57,792
because that name on the wrong
girl would just...
283
00:10:57,825 --> 00:10:59,825
Ooh! So...
284
00:10:59,860 --> 00:11:03,460
You should feel really good
about yourself.
285
00:11:03,496 --> 00:11:06,066
- She's cute.
286
00:11:06,099 --> 00:11:07,299
- You guys haven't ordered yet,
have you?
287
00:11:07,334 --> 00:11:12,114
Because I need to present this
coupon to the waiter first.
288
00:11:12,139 --> 00:11:14,779
- Don't know what that means.
289
00:11:14,808 --> 00:11:16,438
- He's so ironic, this one.
290
00:11:16,476 --> 00:11:18,106
- Oh! (Laughs)
291
00:11:18,145 --> 00:11:20,775
- So where are you
living now, Moira?
292
00:11:20,814 --> 00:11:23,054
Tell us all about it.
293
00:11:23,083 --> 00:11:25,893
MOIRA: Oh, we're in a rustic,
ranch style...
294
00:11:25,919 --> 00:11:28,089
bungalow... that--
295
00:11:29,823 --> 00:11:31,063
JOCELYN: It's very nice.
296
00:11:31,091 --> 00:11:33,731
Very nice, it's got plenty
of parking,
297
00:11:33,761 --> 00:11:35,861
and a TV in every room.
298
00:11:35,896 --> 00:11:37,766
DON: Oh, how many bedrooms?
299
00:11:37,798 --> 00:11:40,098
- Ten.
- Ten bedrooms!
300
00:11:40,133 --> 00:11:43,073
- Yeah, well, we don't use
all the bedrooms.
301
00:11:43,103 --> 00:11:45,013
- That must be a nightmare
to clean!
302
00:11:45,038 --> 00:11:47,138
- Um, Stevie does
an adequate job.
303
00:11:47,174 --> 00:11:48,884
- Stevie's one of your staff?
- Mhmm!
304
00:11:48,909 --> 00:11:52,179
- (Laughs) Stevie's the only
staff.
305
00:11:52,212 --> 00:11:53,912
JOCELYN: This olive tapenade
is--
306
00:11:53,947 --> 00:11:56,017
- Salty, I know!
307
00:11:56,049 --> 00:11:57,279
- Is it? I-I thought
it was good,
308
00:11:57,317 --> 00:12:00,287
but yeah, it's salty.
309
00:12:00,320 --> 00:12:03,190
BEV: Hmm! Here's a funny story.
- Oh, good.
310
00:12:03,223 --> 00:12:06,393
- On our way here,
we drove through a town...
311
00:12:06,426 --> 00:12:10,026
not a word of a lie, called...
"Schittstown!"
312
00:12:11,464 --> 00:12:14,274
- Oh! No, it was called,
"Schittsville!"
313
00:12:14,301 --> 00:12:15,971
- Schittsville! (Laughs)
314
00:12:16,003 --> 00:12:17,303
- And from the looks of it,
315
00:12:17,337 --> 00:12:19,307
the town was living up
to its name!
316
00:12:19,339 --> 00:12:22,339
- Let's not go for the
low-hanging fruit here, Don.
317
00:12:22,375 --> 00:12:25,175
Okay?
- No, these are funny jokes.
318
00:12:25,212 --> 00:12:27,312
Please continue, Don.
319
00:12:27,347 --> 00:12:29,747
- You see, Roland gets it!
(Chuckles)
320
00:12:33,520 --> 00:12:36,190
(Loud rock song plays)
321
00:12:42,062 --> 00:12:43,402
- You know, I'm actually having
more fun at this party
322
00:12:43,430 --> 00:12:45,430
than I thought I would.
323
00:12:45,465 --> 00:12:47,565
- How did you do it?
324
00:12:47,600 --> 00:12:49,800
- Well, I started
by drinking all four
325
00:12:49,837 --> 00:12:51,467
of those peach schnapps
that you left in my fridge--
326
00:12:51,504 --> 00:12:53,914
- No, I mean you seemed
so cool about everything
327
00:12:53,941 --> 00:12:57,441
after we broke up.
It was almost annoying.
328
00:12:57,477 --> 00:12:59,907
- Cool?
329
00:12:59,947 --> 00:13:03,977
Alexis, I couldn't stop crying.
330
00:13:04,017 --> 00:13:05,987
I was scaring all
the animals at work.
331
00:13:06,019 --> 00:13:11,119
But when I... had to go on our
honeymoon without you,
332
00:13:13,326 --> 00:13:15,126
the zip line instructor
333
00:13:15,162 --> 00:13:17,402
at the Los Passions Couples
Resort told me
334
00:13:17,430 --> 00:13:21,600
that I just gotta get
through it.
335
00:13:21,634 --> 00:13:25,014
Meaning my fear of heights,
which I did get through.
336
00:13:25,038 --> 00:13:27,408
But with you, it just...
337
00:13:29,009 --> 00:13:31,309
it took a little longer.
338
00:13:32,946 --> 00:13:35,046
- I'm sorry.
339
00:13:35,082 --> 00:13:37,182
- It's okay.
340
00:13:39,987 --> 00:13:41,957
Staff dance?
341
00:13:41,989 --> 00:13:44,159
- Yes!
342
00:13:52,632 --> 00:13:54,102
- Mmm!
343
00:13:56,036 --> 00:13:57,636
Hmm, I thought I was shame
eating in private.
344
00:13:57,670 --> 00:14:00,140
- What is shame eating?
345
00:14:00,173 --> 00:14:03,943
- I don't think we have enough
time for that tonight.
346
00:14:03,977 --> 00:14:05,877
- Are you looking for someone?
347
00:14:05,913 --> 00:14:07,583
- No, yeah, I mean, sorry,
348
00:14:07,614 --> 00:14:10,924
I'm just, I lost my friend
who should be around here
349
00:14:10,951 --> 00:14:12,951
somewhere um, watching this so.
350
00:14:12,986 --> 00:14:14,486
- Are you here with Stevie?
351
00:14:14,521 --> 00:14:16,991
- I am. Yeah.
352
00:14:17,024 --> 00:14:18,364
- Okay.
- Not here "with."
353
00:14:18,391 --> 00:14:20,591
No, we're not together,
I'm very much single, so.
354
00:14:20,627 --> 00:14:22,657
- You wanna get some air?
355
00:14:22,695 --> 00:14:24,895
- Yeah. Uh huh.
356
00:14:24,932 --> 00:14:26,432
Mm! Yeah.
357
00:14:34,607 --> 00:14:37,177
to get another bottle of this
undrinkable wine?
358
00:14:37,210 --> 00:14:39,650
- I think it's good.
359
00:14:39,679 --> 00:14:41,649
I ordered the one with
the highest alcohol content.
360
00:14:41,681 --> 00:14:44,021
- What do you do, Roland?
361
00:14:44,051 --> 00:14:47,191
BEV: Something in agriculture,
by the looks of it?
362
00:14:47,220 --> 00:14:50,090
JOCELYN: Roland is actually
the mayor of our town.
363
00:14:50,123 --> 00:14:51,663
BEV AND DON: Oh!
364
00:14:51,691 --> 00:14:55,161
- Not Schittsville, I hope!
(Bev and Don laugh)
365
00:14:55,195 --> 00:14:56,955
- What do you even call
someone from Schittsville?
366
00:14:56,997 --> 00:14:58,667
A Schitter? A Schitthead?
367
00:14:58,698 --> 00:15:01,938
- Okay, you know what?
- John, John.
368
00:15:01,969 --> 00:15:03,499
- Don't worry, Moira,
I won't say anything untoward.
369
00:15:03,536 --> 00:15:05,366
- We're just having fun, John.
370
00:15:05,405 --> 00:15:06,965
- And I thought we were
having fun, Bev,
371
00:15:07,007 --> 00:15:08,177
but you know what, we're not.
372
00:15:08,208 --> 00:15:10,438
- Oh come on, it's just a joke!
373
00:15:10,477 --> 00:15:13,177
- No Don, here's the joke.
374
00:15:13,213 --> 00:15:15,623
The joke is I'm sitting here
in a half decent restaurant
375
00:15:15,648 --> 00:15:18,648
with my wife and our friends...
376
00:15:21,254 --> 00:15:23,494
and all you two have done
is complain about the food,
377
00:15:23,523 --> 00:15:26,363
and pretend that you didn't
leave us high and dry
378
00:15:26,393 --> 00:15:28,433
after we lost everything.
379
00:15:28,461 --> 00:15:29,631
- Oh, we're past all that now.
380
00:15:29,662 --> 00:15:32,272
- I'm not quite past it, Moira.
381
00:15:32,299 --> 00:15:34,129
You wrote us off, Don.
382
00:15:35,402 --> 00:15:37,402
Not a phone call,
383
00:15:37,437 --> 00:15:39,367
not an email,
384
00:15:39,406 --> 00:15:42,206
not a nickel.
385
00:15:42,242 --> 00:15:44,682
Roland and Jocelyn here,
386
00:15:44,711 --> 00:15:46,481
could not have been
more generous
387
00:15:46,513 --> 00:15:48,683
with what little they have.
388
00:15:50,183 --> 00:15:52,523
They found us a place to live,
389
00:15:52,552 --> 00:15:56,092
they've offered us their truck
whenever we've needed it.
390
00:15:56,123 --> 00:15:59,233
they've invited us
to their parties,
391
00:15:59,259 --> 00:16:03,299
they even offered to take us
out to dinner tonight.
392
00:16:03,330 --> 00:16:05,030
- Well, just to be clear,
Johnny,
393
00:16:05,065 --> 00:16:06,395
we were always gonna split
the bill,
394
00:16:06,433 --> 00:16:07,733
it's just with the coupon--
395
00:16:07,767 --> 00:16:09,567
JOCELYN: Rollie, Rollie.
396
00:16:10,803 --> 00:16:13,213
- (Laughs)
397
00:16:13,240 --> 00:16:15,610
- And that town
you passed through,
398
00:16:15,642 --> 00:16:17,482
it's not called Schittsville.
399
00:16:17,510 --> 00:16:20,010
It's called Schitt's Creek.
400
00:16:20,047 --> 00:16:22,117
And it's where we live.
401
00:16:33,126 --> 00:16:35,096
- So Jake, um...
402
00:16:35,128 --> 00:16:37,298
do you drink red wine,
or white wine?
403
00:16:37,330 --> 00:16:39,270
- I don't really drink wine.
404
00:16:39,299 --> 00:16:40,529
I'm more of a beer guy.
405
00:16:40,567 --> 00:16:42,097
- Right. Yeah.
406
00:16:42,135 --> 00:16:44,435
That doesn't help me much. Um...
407
00:16:44,471 --> 00:16:47,171
- Well, I better get going.
408
00:16:47,207 --> 00:16:49,237
I've gotta get to the shop
early tomorrow morning, so.
409
00:16:49,276 --> 00:16:51,376
- Oh, you work retail as well?
410
00:16:51,411 --> 00:16:54,781
- No, no. The wood shop.
I make furniture.
411
00:16:54,814 --> 00:16:57,824
- Ah. Yeah.
No, I did a lot of um...
412
00:16:57,850 --> 00:16:59,320
I did a lot of wood working
in high school.
413
00:16:59,352 --> 00:17:01,092
- Oh.
- Yeah, uh,
414
00:17:01,121 --> 00:17:02,721
Christie McFadden accidentally
nailed her hand
415
00:17:02,755 --> 00:17:04,615
to her paper towel holder,
416
00:17:04,657 --> 00:17:07,187
so that's-the lesson is just
not to nail stuff--
417
00:17:11,664 --> 00:17:14,274
- You know, I'm a pretty
open-minded guy.
418
00:17:14,301 --> 00:17:17,471
So... why don't you stop
by the shop sometime?
419
00:17:17,504 --> 00:17:18,774
- Okay.
420
00:17:18,805 --> 00:17:21,265
- Good night.
- Good night.
421
00:17:25,178 --> 00:17:27,108
I knew it!
422
00:17:27,147 --> 00:17:33,547
*
423
00:17:33,586 --> 00:17:35,686
(Stevie and Twyla chat quietly)
424
00:17:37,224 --> 00:17:39,494
- Uh...
425
00:17:39,526 --> 00:17:41,856
- Where were you?
426
00:17:41,894 --> 00:17:44,304
- Where were you?!
427
00:17:44,331 --> 00:17:46,331
- Some townies were trying
to get us high,
428
00:17:46,366 --> 00:17:48,336
and we didn't want
to offend them,
429
00:17:48,368 --> 00:17:50,798
because they're doing
so well in life.
430
00:17:50,837 --> 00:17:54,207
Didn't want to burn a bridge.
431
00:17:54,241 --> 00:17:56,841
- Actually, those boys did burn
a bridge last summer.
432
00:17:56,876 --> 00:18:00,306
Luckily they don't get as bored
as they used to.
433
00:18:00,347 --> 00:18:02,117
- Okay. Um...
434
00:18:02,149 --> 00:18:03,549
So Jake is into me.
435
00:18:06,219 --> 00:18:07,889
- Is he?
436
00:18:07,920 --> 00:18:10,890
- Yeah!
- What makes you think that?
437
00:18:10,923 --> 00:18:15,633
- Because we just necked
out behind the barn.
438
00:18:15,662 --> 00:18:18,732
- Seriously, what makes
you think that?
439
00:18:20,767 --> 00:18:23,397
- Because we put our
mouths together,
440
00:18:23,436 --> 00:18:25,906
out behind the barn.
441
00:18:25,938 --> 00:18:28,838
- Just so you know,
I kissed him too.
442
00:18:31,911 --> 00:18:34,581
- Well, that didn't happen.
443
00:18:34,614 --> 00:18:37,584
- Who's to say?
444
00:18:37,617 --> 00:18:41,217
- Well, when would you have
had time to do that?
445
00:18:41,254 --> 00:18:43,664
Did he invite you
to his wood shop?
446
00:18:43,690 --> 00:18:45,860
Sorry, that came out wrong.
447
00:18:47,660 --> 00:18:49,630
("Precious Love"
by James Morrison)
448
00:18:49,662 --> 00:18:52,572
(Slow rock song plays)
449
00:18:52,599 --> 00:18:56,669
*
450
00:18:56,703 --> 00:18:58,743
- Smells like grass in here.
451
00:18:58,771 --> 00:19:01,441
- Oh my God!
- Oh my God!
452
00:19:03,743 --> 00:19:05,753
- Okay, this is not okay!
What are you guys doing here?!
453
00:19:05,778 --> 00:19:08,418
- Shhh, Alexis!
454
00:19:08,448 --> 00:19:11,578
For once in your life shhhh!
455
00:19:11,618 --> 00:19:14,288
- I don't care what snarky
remarks you kids are gonna make
456
00:19:14,321 --> 00:19:17,761
under your breath, tonight
we are dancing as a family.
457
00:19:17,790 --> 00:19:19,460
- What is happening?
458
00:19:19,492 --> 00:19:20,892
* Well, I'm down on my knees
459
00:19:20,927 --> 00:19:22,457
* Begging you please
460
00:19:22,495 --> 00:19:26,465
* To give me some more
of that stuff *
461
00:19:26,499 --> 00:19:28,669
- Do you know your father and I
462
00:19:28,701 --> 00:19:32,371
hold great affection
for the two of you?
463
00:19:32,405 --> 00:19:34,335
it may not always be obvious,
but--
464
00:19:34,374 --> 00:19:36,844
- Just say it, Moira!
465
00:19:36,876 --> 00:19:39,276
- We love you both very much.
466
00:19:39,312 --> 00:19:41,252
- Love you too!
467
00:19:45,285 --> 00:19:46,545
- Love you too.
468
00:19:46,586 --> 00:19:47,916
- (Laughs)
469
00:19:49,522 --> 00:19:53,232
* Understand, understand
470
00:19:53,260 --> 00:19:56,600
* This is love love love love
471
00:19:56,629 --> 00:19:58,629
* Precious love
472
00:19:58,665 --> 00:20:00,325
* This is precious love
473
00:20:00,367 --> 00:20:04,267
* And is teaching me
to be a better man *
474
00:20:04,304 --> 00:20:06,844
* This is precious love,
Precious love *
475
00:20:06,873 --> 00:20:09,543
* No I can't get enough
476
00:20:09,576 --> 00:20:12,576
* Oh I'm down on my knees
then I see *
477
00:20:12,612 --> 00:20:14,782
* You must be
from heaven above *
478
00:20:14,814 --> 00:20:18,994
* It's love love
love love love *
479
00:20:19,018 --> 00:20:20,848
* Precious love
480
00:20:20,887 --> 00:20:23,957
* Oh, it's love love love love
Precious love *
32545
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