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First time in Africa men?
-Yes. Yes first time -Do you like Africa?
-Wonderfull -The landscape?
- Nice that also. The car sucks, Gatho
They said NCC. -Don't worry. this car is a bomb (never fails)
30 years with me and it never betray me
we have to proceed walking
Come on it's a nice day
It has been month that it did't rain
Where are we?
-We are in the territory of Kasu a really dangerous tribe
Even
But don't worry men is impossible to meet them at this time
-Don't worry men I'll talk... -No No. You will stay silent, I'll talk.
Good evening we came in peace
Good evening...Sorry for the time
-Who is this guy -He's Dogon theie king
Good evening Dogon
He said that you sneaked in his land
No, no please let's make it clear I'm just passing through here. Translate
I don't have intention of stealing
Also because they have nothing... -èàòè... -Shut up
He does't trust white human he said that they have a big head and no heart... -No those are from Milan
He wants to know the story of your soul to understand if you are worthy to go through this land
-What if I'm not worthy? You will be burned alive in this fire and your ashes will be fertilizer for this ground
Well right it look right
So you want to listen to the whole story of my life? Look it's long guys Well, ok..
Where shall i begin?! Look Dogon I think that our god since we are young
gives us some flair
That we have to preserve and make them grow
You for example,Clarissa. What do you want to be? I want to be a veterinary
and you,Martina The musician
you Caio. -The scientist
And you Kekko. what do you want to be? I want to do the permanent employee...Like you
Like my dad that used to bring me to the public offices to see the permanent employments
What peaceful people, what satisfied existences -No I don't pay from the office how's the weather at Toronto?
My father used to tell me that there was a guardian angel that was going to help me to become a permanent employee
But I must work hard
Hey it's uncle is dad there? -Wait I'll call you back because i don't pay
In conclusion I was destined
Here your hunting license Liuzzi. -Thank you. I've bring you a quail
-No, the quail. You're great Liuzzi, you know that just today I was thinking that... -Kecco is not that this is not corruption?
Psychosis around. Liuzzi, corruption is if you don't have the right to have the hunting license and come to me public permanent employee and say
"can you give me the hunting license" but we haven't done this deal did we? -No,no -And give me this qail
Is this aged Liuzzi. -Wait Keccois not that this is graft?
A graft is if you have the right of hunting license and I say "No, you must give me the quail". Did I made this imposition to you? No, gentlemen of the court you. You bring the quail to me spontaneously
-Rigth, right - Are we convinced now?
-Yes, yes -Give it to me
-Is not that... -Is not that you go fuck off you and the quail,today I'm sorry but at the television they talk just about corruption, graft..
-Education, it's called. Here everybody,for education, bring something to the permanent employee. Now give it to me
-Do you know how to cook this? -My mother-in-law does it cool
-Meh, how is it? - 6--
It's gristly and lacks of salt. -Shut up
Lacks of salt and it's a little gristly. -Yes you're right is gristly
It's the first time i cook it, sweety. -Why didn't let your mother cook it? -So when you will be married you won't complain
Sweety I was thinking for tonight... -Tonight there's the football match. Did you prepare the carryall (bag)
We, permanent employees, were venerated like gods. - The hot tea
To marry one of us would means that in the life you have made... GOOL...
But there was another girl in my life
So, a lovely mother. Food,light and gas at the expense of my father
Dogol do you believe in reincarnation?
The one who reincarnated in me was fucking luck
But clearly all this luck was annoying some god up there
I still remember that morning
I went to work in advance
It looked like a morning like all the others. Gout from home with bike ... a nice ride to the office
I pick up the badge already signed, i go to the bar where i find all my colleagues Minister Magno explain us the meaning of this law
Look I was thinking about an entire revolution of public administration
Oh, that's awful they suppress us
The objective it to slim down, modernize.. Guys we are the permanent employees nobody can do anything to us
the last numerous programs haven't done anything. Today I can say that this revolution started
and with a gradual suppression of provincial bodies. There will be summoned to the Rome ministry
for the replacement of those entities that does't satisfies the following requirements
comma one of the law
And what it means? -Chitchat, nothing it means nothing
-Means that who belongs to the following categories is not part of the measure so he has nothing to worry
let's start
A) the worker with more than 30 year of service
Darn you
B) worker who does police service on the territory
C) the married worker or with children
I'm not married and I don't have children but I don't worry
I said just think if there is not my category
and he moved on
D .... E .... F....
G
the worker with handicap. -Thanks mom
And.... H
the worker with a person with handicap in his family. -My brother Mario is deaf-mute
Deaf-mute thanks Mario. -What the fuck are you screaming at? He can't hear you. -All this noise for nothing
Vanelli, and me?
Me... -But now don't break down (alla mamma) -Mum you have to be quiet,mum -Why? What have i done now?
You always took care of yourself mum, it was sufficient that you was a little invalid.
You had the poly-cyst and you cure yourself... -and by the best doctor ...and the diabetes and you cure it
"I have to be healthy" ... at 70 years she has to be healthy
this is egoism -Sorry kecco what I have to do? -He's right an invalid in the family is always useful
Why don't you do it? - If only i could
I they recognize me the occupational disease, carpal tunnel
You told me hundred of time this story dad, now let's think a little about me
There's only one solution to come out of this
Let's go
-Do you know what this means? - Yes, but I want you to tell me -It means that sometimes in your life
One decide to.. -Decide to? -Wait a second there's Fanelli the office manager, try it in the meanwhile
Good evening, madam. Fanelli. -What are you doing here?
I asked my girl to marry me so I'll avoid the mobility
Bravo
The effects of the marriage are not retroactive
And what that means? -Means that you had to be married before the law entered into force
Mum, he decided, he give up
Hi Fanelli. -Hi, break a leg
This guy is completely stupid
So, you where saying that it means that?
It means that there's the intention, there's the ring, when there is going to be the decision
we will marry. Now let's get out of here
And where are we going now? -Another place come on -With the carriage?
Look to move with your feet. The carriage ... 300€
you're not even retroactive
No guy no. She didn't love me
She loved my permanencity of my job
For sure I didn't let her fasted that night it is not in my style
I risk the transfer to 30,40,50 km of distance and you talk me about marriage
But i love you
So if you love me go and take me a beer, fast
So. after 15 years to service of my nation they force me to leave my office
Because the law is arid and it doesn't take into account the feeling
Kecco can i leave you couple of oil-packed? -No take everything with you I don't want memories of this ....
I arrived at Rome and I still had the image of the sad face of my girlfriend in my mind. Who knows how much she was grieve for me
-Can you pass me Penelope? -Don't call again between you it's over.
So you were saying. What impress you of a women?
The sincerity madam
Now, I was really alone .At the mercy of a malevolent fate
But the guardian angel. Doesn't abandon his permanent employees
Yes guys it was not an illusion it was him
I'm a scrap. who I placed I placed. No senator, you already placed me. I'm your country
you placed my dad at the town hall and my uncle at the region hall
-Where i placed you to do shit? -At the province hall -Oh sweat, sweat. -But now you heard the new law
- they put me in mobility -What mobility? Those want to fire, do you know what they do those motherfuckers of the ministry?
The last available place is in Valdultima, Trentino Alto Adige (somewhere in the nowhere in north Italy)
Ok, i got it I'll sing the resignation. -You made the wisest choice
Lionero del Vulture? -Is the closest...
Of course will follow you in a path of reinsertion
a real extortion and the people who fall into it
And I would have fall too if i didn't meet him. So I sign the resignation..
Don't blaspheme, the permanent employment it's holy
I must not be penetrated like all the others
Tell me... - No, you have to have an interview with the doctor
I saw that she was a girl and i though she was the secretary
No, I'm the manager -And you the secretary?
Where the fuck we are...
So, Zalone you matured a severance packet of 27'482€ -482 I did the calculation
well
I managed to get, if you write to me the voluntary termination of employment, a severance packet of 35000€
I don't believe that doctor. It a digit disproportionate if it was real I would sign with my eyes shut
Here it is
Are you kidding me?
No I'm not kidding. -I do. You think that I leave my permanent job
For 7000€ more in the TFR but is she of this profession at least?
What was your essential duty that you conducted in this strategic provincial hall?
No No don't gat angry. -No angry? this was my job
I put the stamps to the licenses of hunting and fishing for 10 years, then I changed
then in the intense periods. Even, in the period of Easter
I had to use the auxiliary arm
Oh so fun... You will never put those stamps again
Do you know where I'll send you. -Please don't tell me, I love surprises
Mum don't be worried for me, here is wonderful. They sent me in Val di Susa (near Turin)
-For doing what?
Good morning I have to check the decree of expropriation of this house
We don't want the high speed here..Nhè (Turin expression)
We have to expropriate your house
little by little until 7 of evening
Province of Nuoro? Sardinia?
Ahio (hi in Sardinian) Fanelli! feel like a million bucks here!
Practically my colleagues organized to me this treatment..
where if there's something to do, also a photocopy, they say "no you can't du that let your colleague do it"
How is it called? -Mobbing -Yes mobbing how it relax me...
Ah... From val di Susa to Medusa, so tell them to fuck off. Don't sign
For me is yes. Welcome to Italy
No No guys! the graduated ones after! is there a midfielder? No guy we play in 11 there's no place for everyone
Dr. Sironi
Soon you're going to work with me in my office
Really?
I've read your performance
You solved 1000 and? -1243 contracts
Of? -1244 minister
So only one employee resisted to your lethal charm? -Yes, and i'm going to meet him now
Don't be so cruel
So, this is tomin Piemontese (kind of cheese from Piemonte)
Original? -Really original
Michele Notavo gave it to me
this is the capper from Lampedusa. Totò Scafiesch** gave it to me
this is iron wire (grappa)
Sardinian grappa
Beautiful doctor
For you we have the sausage
Valle di Susa but also under
So take it
Thank you so much but I have offer to make to you -Me too doctor
Toscana...mmm gez... if you can...if you can
Zalone
Those are 50.000€
Until we're joking we joke, but our country is in disastrous conditions and what do you do?
you give 50.000€ to me?
Is graduated this girl?
Please... -No eh?!
Some politics? We need valid people
Otherwise you can't restore (cure) the country
Tell me a shitty place
so shitty where also a radioactive waste, a parasite would feel awkward
Come on I want a piece of crap
It just arrived this request
Doctor do I send immediately a communication? -No
He likes the surprises
I won't leave my permanent employment, understand?
I won't leave my privileges
understand?
they think that I'll give up. I have to give up for them
Only because they sent me here
"Morti di mammata" - insulting you via your dead loved ones (literal translation: "Your mother ugly dead relatives")
They sent me to north pole. Let's talk about this also a part time is fine "Morti di mammata" - insulting you via your dead loved ones (literal translation: "Your mother ugly dead relatives")
"Morti di mammata" - insulting you via your dead loved ones (literal translation: "Your mother ugly dead relatives")
Let me call her. This big bastard
Look who's here
Do i reply? -No, let's make him cold down a little
Also here thanks
Porca puttana (bitch pig -> damn it,fuck)
Is anyone here?
Jesus help me
give me a sign of live
Mum
at the Arctic Circle is fucking cold
More than Roccaraso more
Mum i can't hear you I'll call you later
I get it but where are we?
What I have to do here? -We are in the area on national research of Ni olizont
and you have to defend one of our researcher for polar bear attacks
Me?
That sadly are becoming more frequent. Jeson knows something
Who is the person that you'll substitute
She shut it down
Listen, but... what do you do here We do a lot of stuff here, especially stuff about the melting of icecap
Ah is melting the icecap? -Eh (yes, a lot)
Listen, did you already saw the psychologist
Of course there the psychologist. Is not easy to stay here
Six mouth of light, six mouth of darkness
Look doctor when I was young and my mother bought me the calippo
by looking it melting I already suffered a lot
Now imagine with the icecap. Those are things that I can't handle, I know myself
Is strange Zalone because the dr. Sironi
describes you as a decided and resolute man
with a strong inclination to adaptation and sacrifice
-Forget it -That's sad because call the researcher with you would work side by side -Another shall be researched
He does the researcher, he can research another one
So sad, see you!
Oh here ***
our researcher, the doctor Nobili. -Nice to meet you
Valeria -Hi, Kecco
Valeria I've talked with the sir Zalone but he said that...
I'm a person decided and resolute with a strong inclination to sacrifice. When will we begin?
Pull more a smile of a girl that a rhinoceros
We also say like that Dogon
But instead of the rhinoceros wee put the oxcar and instead of the smile we put... (fur of vagina)
You're more romantic
Why did you decided to come up here?
the truth? for saving this place
Nice, I like it
Is a little utopian but is the right attitude
I mean my place
Yes, your place, my place... -oh, she didn't get a fuck -...because the world is everyone place
I don't tolerate the people who think only about themselves -Egotists
Yes, because the pollution of sea and the earth worming is everyone problem
Indeed the increase of the polar bear attacks is a direct consequence on the icecap melting
But now Valeria they have to face me
What is that? -What? -That one It's a lemming
it doesn't hurst -Look you can say lion, tiger and I won't be scared but the lemming I always had...
Because is smart the lemming is a bastard
-Look i pick up this samples of snow
where there might can be some atmosphere particulate that might contains some toxic material
You should watch my back
what cause me that girl
in few moments she was able to transform in paradise what it looked like hell
In a pleasant fresh what was the polar ice
and in a cute lemming what was a sewer rat because that's what a lemming is
But there with here, it had poetry (being nice)
What is love?!
Kecco the bucket
Go
how do you call it this paranza (kind of fish)? -This is krill and is the base of the food chain on the whole artic fauna
Lead, mercury, hydrocarbon I've seen everything in here
Also the arsenic is there
Look that the arsenic is not present in this sea yet -Instead, It is Massimo
Also the arsenic arrived. -A little a little it smell of
If you have some question ask me guys
Write cadmium...
From the last spectrometric analysis. there will be soon some genetic mutation
by now is a vicious circle
Sorry can you make me part of it
what is this vicious circle?
Ou! I'm part of the team I want to understand
who feeds of krill?
the seal - and who feeds of seal?
Mattarella
God, look how is beautiful
A adult men. prepare the reagent we have to sedate it for couple of hours
did you take the anesthetic?
-I took a sedative - Not for you for the bear, for the shotgun
Come on, go closer
Done
Go before we lose it, come on go
Good now it's in position ... shot
I hit it, right?
I don't think so
I told you not to do it -You told me that you can shot -I can shot the quail not the polar bear
wait!
wait
you hit it
you hit it. I have an unerring aim, don't I?
Do I say lies? -No -I hit it!!
Don't glare at me!
"I'm the polar bear the biggest animal in the world and you pass out with a bit of anesthetic
you don't move anymore
Poor, look
the high temperatures are damaging also the wool
What do you do now? -I collect a sample of blood
The best thing would be a spermiogram but...
you understand that is not possible
doctor what about Zalone?
Do you want to listen live the surrender of a man?
yes
I'll use the speakerphone
Doctor -Zalone
I've noticed that you were looking for me insistently. What are you doing?
I'm masturbating the polar bear, doctor
I wanted to thank you
you gave me a dream
Hey, I left you the analysis in the lab
there's also the spermiogram
Impossible -Yes is true, practically he did....
Have you seen kecco?
He was here for a moment and then he went away -Ok, thanks
Mum, now there's another girl in my life, so for now on you hate to call me less frequently
Yes -Kecco can I? -Sure
Hey, I wanted to say hi I'm leaving
Right you go back home during the weekend
Yes...What do you do here?
What you think i can do here?
Isn't that you want to come with me? -No Valeria you might want to stay with your boyfriend
I don't have a boyfriend. Come on, how much does it take to do your bag?
Done
Let's go
There we are this si my home
Sorry give me one moment
I'll wait you inside
Mum? -Can you tell me now how is this girl?
how's?how's? Do you have in mind Cameron Diaz?
Put inside Margherita hack a spraying of Licia Colo and there she is
But mum don't call me so frequently call me just if you can't handle it anymore for the melancholy
Bye, I go to her
this is a collection of photographs of my life
Wonderful you went around the world and only for the animals
Yes you know where there are the emergency
Look this is my African period
I worked there for two years I left there my heart
He's Babu my boyfriend of that time, the dad of Ysaid
This is my period in the Philippine, what a wonderful place
And he's Himuel my boyfriend of Philippine the dad of Emily
This is my recent period in Norway where I knew Gunnar the dad of Ilars
Did you adopt them right?
No, they are my natural children....and this is Carula
A friend? -Well, more than a friend I had a relation with her
A confused period
Damn I have to shout down the fire, you an continue
Kecco, can you come and help me? -Yes I just finish the equine period and I come
Sorry, I'm a little hungry
God, bless this food
and let anyone be able to eat
Amen
and you? -I'm atheist -Thanks god
So this is like? -Salmon with sour creme
and this is apple juice
Maybe is the combination that doen't work
Ah Norvigian period -Yes, Hilar's dad
Sadly he cannot stop by for dinner -So sad
Let me understand, he lives with you. -Not for so long, he's going to marry
Kecco how old are you?
-38 -Are you married?
No, I live with my mum and dad
Kids
Excuse them, they find you a little strange
No wait, let me understand, in here I'm the strange one
the kids were sorry they was afraid that they hurt you -That's why you get up here
let them come
Up up! come on!
Let's go to bad that is late! this is a Sergio Pascuzzi it costs 600€ is that you miss the real values
ok let's go to sleep, also because is midnight
there's a wonderful sun
But I'm strange, me
It's green
Go Isaid,go!
Isaid come here
So, when you are in the penalty area as soon as the rival touch you
you fall, some paroxysm and the referee gives you the penalty kick, understand?
go,go. -But it's unfair
What does it means? -That is not correct
Suddenly I had a doubt. Isn't that I was the strange one
I felt the need to change and trying to be...
more civil
Let me understand, to be civil how long I have to wait, after the light became green, to honk to the car in front on me? -Never
I'd never honk
you'll see that sooner or later the car will move -Seee (I don't believe that)
Wow.
How many useless "fuck you" I said in my life?!
Nothing I'm just training to respect the queue in a civil way. Congratulation you are a great country
and in a great country like that
there could not lack the unmissable appointments with the civilization
Nice, right? -Really nice
is already one hour and half that their are playing
what king of event is this?
Is the concert in order to not forget
No, who's going to forget this night
But it is nice, it's civil, I like this country you know?
Civilization means also equality in the housekeeping
and taking care of children ... also if their are not yours
they're fighting
Hey, hey, I'll go
Guys, guys! Come here! give it to me!
Let's make one thing clear
Here nobody prevail on someone else
Right? -Right!
Because, it's true, you're occidental race, superior race, but you're younger
You're the big brother but you're much more black
So you're equivalent. Right?
Yes, ok Kecco. Let's go! -I'll take this
Ok, guys I was still learning but I knew how make them like me
Oh, the panserotti those ones are delicious! Emily the pray. -No, no those ones have to be eaten while they are still hot I already pray them for you while I was spreading out the dough.
This is the Buddhist, this is the Islamic, this is the Christian and this is the best one the Atheist
Rise, potato and krill (actually the recipe is with mussels instead on krill they adapted to Norway :D)
and also the scientific world started to appreciate my knowhow
Try now...
Guys 15 year of public work, those are the basics
then I'll learn you to take the snacks without paying
But now
only one thing was missing
to reach the idyll
I graduated in Italy -But all that north
maybe it cool down my latin instinct
or maybe I was thinking that it would be a little rede
and I gave up
but than I learned one thing
that in a civilic world
is the girl who use the tongue
So guys, at the end we end up together. They wanted to punish me but I was happy
But someone realized that in addition to my basic salary of 1300€ I took also
900€ of travel expenses benefit, plus 1200€ of risk benefit
A total of 3700€ per month
to be spent in the wonderful fjord frame
I was thinking... -You were thinking
what the fuck were you thinking?
How the fuck do you work'
the photo on the newspaper... the minister of (money) waste
Now you have to resolve this immediately this incident
and you'll send him immediately home otherwise you'll be the one who'll go home
I'm so happy that you found love between glaciers
sadly you have to go back to Italy
doctor but here I'm giving my contribution to the research
the science will get over it
Italy needs you
Is there a way to stay here doctor? -Just one
you'll sign your demissions with this check in your pocket
60000€
give me a pen -Here your pen
I have a itch back here
I'll ask help from home -Zalone where are you going?
Now they wants to transfer me back to Italy
and the only way is to sign the demissions.. -NOO
Don't you dare
remember the permanent employment is holy -and what can I do senator?
play the bonus ... time off work
thank, senator you're a genius
thank a lot. Good night to senators (italian saying is good night to musicians (suonatori->senatori) )
After those 3 month you'll come to me and we'll see who's going to win
you're not even helping me?! -No, I'm occupational disease doctor, how can I do that?
Without assurance if something happens... no no
is better if I don't
How's the fish of Adriatic sea? -Is much thiner than nordic one
because it doesn't need to produce fat
is the gran coreale a crustacean? -Yes -Darling, enough with questions
why? I is really a pleasure to answer
Yes, is a crustacean that lives in the Athentic ocean
in the nordic seas and if I'm not wrong... -Carl
Baltic -Carl
When I finally thought I became a civil man another obstacle shown up..
jealousy
This one?? -Is a mum's friend
Did they had a relationship together?
I don't know. -Why don't you know that?
Did they have it or not?
Kecco, he's Carl!
tomorrow we would like to do rafting are you going to watch over the kids, right?
Sure, it please me. Go go tomorrow we would like to do rafting are you going to watch over the kids, right?
Sure, it please me. Go go
I'll stay with them
how deep lives the grancoreale?
Kecco, how deep lives the grancoreale? -I don't know check on wikipedia
she's going to rafting with Carl
the hemorrhoids should have Carl, the hemorrhoids...
I was all the night awake for the pain
The morning it was me that civilly I bring Valeria to Carl
So, we'll see tonight
I'll try to make it as fast as possible. -Don't worry you can stay as long as you want I passed through that
What? -Nothing, go...
thank you, bye
yes, guys!
Now I was free from that latin inheritance
which is jealousy
What happened? -He said he doesn't feel well
Oh, there they are
The got the hemorrhoids, I swear!
Anyway
I was a completely different man. I wasn't uncivil, I wasn't disrespectful
I wasn't jealous
I was completely changed
and also my parents noticed that
of how much i was integrated there in Norway
Mum
dad....mum....
are you completely blind?
Come on, lest's go!
Sorry when the occupational disease finished, what are you going to do?
I'll stay in Norway, this place is fantastic
Civilization, efficiency
Did you know that here the state pays you if you don't work?
What have we done in Italy until now? Asshole!
Irony, you're so good to laugh, Italians..
Mum, the seatbelt
But I'm in the rear seat. -Also in the rear seats in the civil countries
Look!
What happened?
An Italian passed from here
Ignore it!
I hate you! when you act like this, I hate you!
-Dad, say that I changed, I look strange to you, I really don't understand
All this children
are her's? are you talking to me using 'her'? Of course their are mine (In Italian we use the third person for formality)
Darlin, for the marriage tomorrow skirt or slacks?
Slacks, darling,... and also the red shirt. -Already done
Can you please give me an hankie
what now for two tears we cut down a tree?
do you know what happen in Amazzonia?
I don't know. -Inform yourself, mummy
Darlin Hinger arrived. -I'm coming
My name is Hinger
and you?
Sorry kecco, can you tell me what time is it?
Kecco, I was having a shower and the warm water finished, Why?
Come on, tell me where is the boiler
Fantastic. -Lady, can you tell to my son to fuck off?
In Norwegian...
Who is going to marry tomorrow?
the third Valeria's boyfriend
The dad of the little son. -Ah, Arsel
But if Valeria's boyfriend
got another son from this new relation, the child that will born
what reation has with Kecco?
He' would be
let me think
There's no the problem of the son
This is music, not pizzica (traditional Puglia's (my region) music), much more elegant
how's wonderful the civilization.
Thank you
Caterina, so?
What makes you suffer?
the facts that I had other boyfriends?
No, in not that
My children?
No, they're wonderful
So, what's wrong?
there's one thing that i cannot accept,Valeria. -What?
My son's blond goatee
So I did that small concession
Finally!
Happy now! Anyway, I was fine with that!
Vale, we're going! Have a nice trip Caterina!
I recommend for Kecco, do the tomato sauce without garlic
Yes, he always does it like that
See you soon!
ciao
Come boys!
Come on daddy I'm not asking much
Can you promise me that you'll open your view, that you'll open your mind. -That you open the gate that wa havev to go
My parents run right away
But I was more convinced to stay there
But I haven't deal with the long Norwegian winter, yet
6 month where it alternate the dark of night
with the dark of the morning
And of course, all of this affects a lot the people's state of mind
Morning madam! I had an appointment with your colleague of the foreign office
but there's none. -He suicided
He jumped form the 6th floor
I don't know, Can I leave this to you?
We'll see tomorrow at 1.42
OK
Madam, one question...
which is your floor?
First floor -Ah ok so I'll come tomorrow
See you!
Then one night it happened that I was there
to do astronomic lesson to Lark
what happen to the white dwarf...
Kecco! -Who's calling? -Your mother -I'll call her tomorrow
and it doesn't have the power to oppose the gravity
and collapse on itself and
And what heppen? ♫You can feel in the air, our love song that flies, like a thought that knows about happiness ♫ -That they come back together
they're back together!
Who? -Who!
they're back together
And I didn't know anything
Do you know what does this means for my country?
what?
what the fuck, Is it possible that you're so arid?
And here, I lost all of that
Mother earth Italy
Started to make call me back
Hinger this language is uselessly difficult. I can translate all those phrases in one word, 2 letters
How was the work interview?
How do you say that?
I'll make you a discount
If I catch you, you're in trouble
I'm quite happy about how it went
At this point I think is useless to continue the lessons
-(Now you understand)
Please my house is full of that, bring them back. -Come on take them!
Only when we loose thing we start to understand the value
Understand? I didn't want to pass trough the queue
But since I have just one bottle and you have the bucket full. We in Italy
We let people pass in front because we are not civil, we are educated
-Come on Kecco let's go -Eat, eat that you're wasting away
let me understand
you come in Italy, you tried our cuisine and then you opened a restaurant here
Yes -And tell me, how do you cook this spaghetto?
Easy take the water, put pasta and light the fire
mmm 30 minutes
Mha I waited to let water boil, I' such an asshole
Do you want something else? -Yes, a screwdriver and a ladder
What are you doing?
V:don't worry! K:Fuck your sister!
What are you doing? K:Don't write "Italy" in vain!
Viking, you're a Viking
What are you doing? V: No, kecco no
Sorry darling but I need this! V:Ok but just once
what the funk are you honking?
I'm Italian
Don't you find it splendid?
Yes, Bergen in the night is wonderful
No the car double-parked
It's natural position
That how they stay! V:Now darling is enough
come on go down and move it
I like it like that
Tomorrow you'll move it. promised?
Let's go to sleep is night! K: Also this morning was night...
I want to go bask to Italy
He was a work
But what are you going to do in Italy!
I got some qualifications
I'll send some CV, I'll so some interview, they'll call back right? -In Italy?
Think carefully!
Guys, enough with those clichés about Italy
Announced delay of the flight from Roma fiumicino to Milano we'll land with 4 hours of delay
It's ours
I already fell home
It has to be due to strike
So, I went back to Italy with my whole new family. Dr. Sironi was a little agry about that
he's mad, he's out of his mind. I hate him!
What's up? what happened?
I offerd hin 70000€
he refused 70000€
Where can I send him? I need a place where he'll feel
in danger, intimidated
Send him where I come from
After the nordic darkness I was finally seeing again the south sunshine
I just arrived and I was immediately enrolled in the Forest Rangers
In order to intimidate me the dr. Sironi gave me a really dangerous task
confiscate the animal owned illegally by mafia's boss
Write a tiger boss Vincenzo Stino
Shut up!
Or I'll come inside
I was good at talking with those people. Don't worry boss it's going to be great
Let's go! Wait a second..
And in short time I became the king of the ..... forest service
Is there someone at the house arrest?
Finally, come in!
Why do we have it?
My son went to the cinema to see the film.. how was it? ...Madagascar
And he was obsessed over having a penguin
And the dad who has a good heart bought it. K:Is he here now? -No, in jail
He played two days and now he doesn't eve look at it
it doesn't play, it doesn't fly e doesn't do a fuck. Take it!
He called it skipper as the idol of he's favorite cartoon
but to welcome it there wasn't the cold glaciers of Madagascar
but a really warm house of Castrovizzo
can we do a plea to those who owns those animals? K: Sure!
Don't take your children to see Dumbo otherwise I'm fucked!
Sorry, can you tell me who are you? -I'm Don Michiele
and they are the guy cooperative to whom has been gave the estate
This is the tribunal letter
And this is instead my cousin's letter, from Brasil,
whom,being the owner of the estate writes:
about the house sticked in the forest you can stay how long as you want -Confiscated not sticked
Oh is an 's' not a 'c'
I have no words
... Tanino? -Tanino la Cirenza is the local boss
I'm really sorry,just give me the time to wake up the children and take our stuff
No but if you want you can stay few more weeks
We don't know what to do here,yet
What do you want to do here?
A social initiative to rescue people. K:Do we want to rescue my cousin?
And was that moment that Valeria
had a great idea
Look mayor in the confiscated estate with the cooperative's people we want to create an oasis for amimals
to cure them and bring them back to their own habitat
Isn't that a nice project for the community?
And what are these papers?
There it is an evaluation of the environmental impact, the earmarking, geologic...
We create an unpleasant situation for the mayor and the community
we don't need the hole for IMU (tax) V:darling? K: I?ll handle that
See you! K: Mayor..
I'll promise that in one week we'll have irregularity to standards
Bravo!
Now let's go and see the animals!
Here there are our chimpanzee, we'll cure them and bring them back to their habitat
This one that you see in isolation is a rare sample of ararauna. It belongs to a Sicilian boss
Suck! -No madam it hat to still to recover don't worry
The enthusiasm was through the roof
but reality bring our feet on the ground
acts of vandalism during the night, great damages for the "oasis of legality"
we have the heartfelt plea of don Michele Vannucci...listen:
I'm speaking to the healthy part of this land
You can change
K: and indeed... -Changed the priest of Castrovizzo
Don Michiele has been transferred in another location
Don Michele stay calm, resist!
we are doing our best also to make the kids integrate here
C...D...E...F...G...H (said with dialect accent)
Sorry kids! Salvino why don't you let him play?
- we don't want foreigners K:But he's not foreigner! tell him where are you from... -I'm from Gioiacauru
Nduja is a particularly spicy, spreadable pork salame from Italy. Really! so what it is "nduja"?
Nduja is a particularly spicy, spreadable pork salame from Italy.
He doesn't know because he's vegetarian -Also gay! Nduja is a particularly spicy, spreadable pork salame from Italy.
He doesn't know because he's vegetarian -Also gay!
But I was looking for a meeting point between our cultures
I avoided Salvino in collaborating with us
?dialect? and them come back here, come on! -Salvo, no
not the bullying
with this you spry the window and with this you clean
Emily no the paradox no!
there are some world equilibrium that have to be respected
despite of my strives there was always more trouble for the integration
It has been month that we don't receive founds
How we cure them? How are we going to feed them?
-Stay calm
This morning I have a visit from a schoolchildren
I refuse to tell again the fairy tale of legality
And tell them "Snow White"! -Fuck you!
Stay calm! I'll go
What eats those felines?
Can I give it a snack? K:Yes! T:No please kids! K:why not?
they are snacks eater so let's give them the snack
also the soppressata (italian salami), pasta with aubergines
is this a skin backpack? you can throw this also
Kids not all to them that there are also chimpanzee that haven't eaten in a month
Come on!
But Valeria had already decided
Valeria why are you so impulsive? I talked with the mayor
and now he'll find you a seasonal job
A seasonal job? K: But it'll become permanent
thank you I was worrying
Kecco what am i going to teach to me sons?
To accept everything like you do
What do I accept?
Where are you going, Valeria?
Listen to me!
Tell me!
I can't live without you! V:don't you?
So lose this obsession of the permanent employment
and come with me
Ok I'll do! because I love you, Valeria
they are congratulating with you! K:Yes, I understood
Thank you guys! It was a love choice
What did he say? -That you lied
No no I didn't lied guys..
I said the truth
A shaman has the power to read in your soul
and now you say that..
asshole!
Dogon, actually it didn't go that way
So lose this obsession of the permanent employment
and come with me
What? are you idiot. Dear, life is done also of concrete stuff. V: Let's go!
Secure salary, trade union protection, sickness leave
paid vacation, family allowances.
I would be lucky if I had that,madam K: We agree
V: Are we going or not? K: Valeria where do you want to go?
Valeria do you know that guarantee fund can be attributable to military years
I deposited too much for resigning
You can't rescind like that without advance notice
I have to dispute you, darling
I know it's easy to judge for you!
What is the job of this guy?
Hunt boars! K:Perfect
let's imagine that you each month
you hunt one boar
in January one arrow, one boar
February one arrow, one boar
and then arrives December
throw you're little arrow and you find two boar
Did ever happen to you?
(thirteenth or christmas bonus: an extra salary for public employee) It's called thirteenth
(thirteenth or christmas bonus: an extra salary for public employee)
If your heart doesn't know this joy, shut up! (thirteenth or christmas bonus: an extra salary for public employee)
If your heart doesn't know this joy, shut up!
because gods condemned you to VAT registration (private workers)
understand?
anyway I was suffering, a lot!
the white dwarf is a star of small dimensions
with a small brightness and a color...
krill, the basic nutrition of seal is mostly in Norwegians sea
the polar bear K:what the fuck today! Without her I became arid and fussy
I didn't let anything go
You can't smoke in the forest
Can't i? K: No, turn it off immediately
Sure, immediately
My goodness!
In order to forget
I started to take shelter into alcohol
Kecco, come and seat with us
Like I did it guys don't worry
Also here doctor, please don't! D:Don't worry I'm here for vacation! Can I join you?
First she seats, and then asks...
Who knows what idea you made about me?
Nobody really knows me deep down
my weaknesses
my desire to fell possessed you a man
Is in that moments that a permanent employee becomes weak and fall down
Now you sign here and I swear that I'll follow you in a reintegration program
No , I want the permanent employment
But I won't leave you alone
Are you going to give me another permanent job?
look here there are 100000€ all for you!
A nice sign here K: where here?
Yes here...
K:give me one moment
There's no other way, ask for work disease
I'm sick I can't sign
Also it is sick both of us are sitk
Here you're 100000€. with them buy yourself a sex doll
Instead of pissing of young people
you sucks!
Go away D:parasite! K: I'll press charges on you
stalking, mouth-ing
Milf-ing
joking
So I went back home
and I fall in depression
My mum attentions were useless
I was destroyed
In the meanwhile in Rome that girl was angrier at me
Minister, believe me Zalone is exhausted
In one week convalescence is over and I was thinking of transferring him -On Pluton...
Zalone on Pluton(e)
Nice newspaper title! Maybe also with my photo below
Don't think anymore doctor
I'll be fine in Bolzano
Is not so cold after all
Good morning everyone, sorry for the late!
we called you
because we just finished
our long work on the public administration
Morning! -Morning! K:What is that? -Minister
Let see where you'll send me this time
Yes, I won!
I swear in my life I had a lot of emotions but come back here to province...
No what province? haven't you read the newspaper?
I still have to get used to it
My first call
yes? -Hello! Public office of hunting and fishing?
"Provincial" you might say to your sister. Now we are metropolitan area of hunting and fishing. Be careful!
And what changed? - A fuck,madam
Why did they do so? K:Now, I'll explain you, madam
The first republic
will not be forgotten
the first republic
what do you pretend to know about?!
about forty-year-old people pensioned that was dancing on the grass
after 10 years flew in the aeronautic
and the paraplegics ushers was jumping
and the janitor deaf-mute where singing
and for a cold they give them
four month to Abano's thermal
and with a ingrowing toenail you were invalid
for all your life
the first republic
will not be forgotten
the first republic
what do you pretend to know about?!
Everything like before you might say
But it wasn't
there was something I missed
I figure it out when I saw that bird flying
I still got her number
Hello! I saw a bird flying free in the air and I was thinking about you
There's nothing this morning, Kecco!
What nothing?
If is here why should not be there?
Wait, wait! K: Bring me a quail Liuzzi!
This is a great day, dad!
because recognizing me the professional disease I'm going to have 250€ more on my pension
Good aren't them?
the quail that nobody can cooked is as well as you're mother does. Where is he going?
I don't know. Someone called him
Who?
Look, I was so angry
I was thinking not to say anything but it wouldn't be right
I'm pregnant
Do you know the ethnicity?
I just say that is this month he never moved, he was "permanent"
are you saying that he's mine?
Yes Kecco, Is your son
Where are you now?
That's why I'm here Dogon!
Friends, in some hours if it didn't already happened I'll become a dad!
And hopefully god is going to give me a boy!
Dogon, I'm asking you
to let me free, I beg you
You lived a miserable life thinking only to your privileges
and doing this you condemned yourself
But also he's daughter is waiting a child
and a son can change your life
Yes I agree, Dogon!
I agree, meh(so what now?)!
try to be a better man that the one you was
we can go K: thanks, Dogon!
thaks guys, thank to everyone
Fuck you!
thanks Dogon! I'll coll him after you!
In so anxious! -Don't worry man, is going to be a little boy!
She's beautiful!
How you named her?
I was waiting for you
I like Ines
Ines is nice
Means purity! K:Also (I)National (N)Institution (E)State (S)Corporation, but purity is fine!
Are you leaving soon? K: No, open that file
You signed your demissions?!
This is the parental leave, this give us 3 month free!
Then my medic friend
certificated a typhus for me and malaria for you
That give us other 6 month
that if you want typhus i can take malaria
And for Ines I have a certification... V: Look that Ines can be infected for real!
and here there's no vaccines!
What do you mean? V: No Kecco, because they are expensive
and when and if they arrives the are rationed!
Rationed? For my daughter rationed? V: Yes!
I'll show you what we do where I come from
What donation?
You don't see where are we do you?
You don't feel a little of emotion or pity
Come on,give my daughter! K:But it's the routine
Come here, my love!
Take your stuff
those scrap papers and go
Zalone, you ruined my life, ant the end of the month they are going to transfer me, what do you want from me?
Don't move! Stay there
Did you ever took psychiatric drugs?
I heard a lot about you doctor
Did you? And from who? From Zalone?
You'll find him much more mature
those are your 31182€
But I asked 50000€ doctor!
This is what is rightful, then you was late in your decision, the reform is over and so the money
I got the solution
You'll put the rest
So, I won't sign!
Sit down!
Ok, ok!
I'll put them
But you'll sign
Immediately!
The pen doesn't work is the destiny!
My love, I'll take yours!
This is your severance pay!
This is my check
I wish you'll spend them for drugs (wishing dab luck/health)
Is not emotion, is not pity, is education
Where is she?
where's our grand-daughter? K:There she is!
Just kidding!
take the original one
Look what I did
My love!
did you want the grandchild now watch over here we are going to research
So cute!
If your son was still working now he would get the family allowance
Fuck you!
I'm form Gioiatauru! (in dialect)
I needed an assistant just for me
me assistant?
OU! I pay you the contributions!
We wanted to take you for this act of generosity
this is our hospital
You are a girl with a big hearth
Thanks doctor!
Welcome in my staff!
Excuse me
she's moved!
So this girl has an heart?!
Zalone
Doctor! -What a surprise you made me?
Did you see?
I moved! K: Did you see that you also have an heart?
You know what I think?
It's so nice give an hand to others
Also two doctor
~~~Subtitled by Andrea Mauro ~~~
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