All language subtitles for tacoma.fd.s03e05.1080p.webrip.x264-cakes

af Afrikaans
ak Akan
sq Albanian
am Amharic
ar Arabic
hy Armenian
az Azerbaijani
eu Basque
be Belarusian
bem Bemba
bn Bengali
bh Bihari
bs Bosnian
br Breton
bg Bulgarian
km Cambodian
ca Catalan
ceb Cebuano
chr Cherokee
ny Chichewa
zh-CN Chinese (Simplified)
zh-TW Chinese (Traditional)
co Corsican
hr Croatian
cs Czech
da Danish
nl Dutch
en English
eo Esperanto
et Estonian
ee Ewe
fo Faroese
tl Filipino
fi Finnish
fr French Download
fy Frisian
gaa Ga
gl Galician
ka Georgian
de German
el Greek
gn Guarani
gu Gujarati
ht Haitian Creole
ha Hausa
haw Hawaiian
iw Hebrew
hi Hindi
hmn Hmong
hu Hungarian
is Icelandic
ig Igbo
id Indonesian
ia Interlingua
ga Irish
it Italian
ja Japanese
jw Javanese
kn Kannada
kk Kazakh
rw Kinyarwanda
rn Kirundi
kg Kongo
ko Korean
kri Krio (Sierra Leone)
ku Kurdish
ckb Kurdish (Soranî)
ky Kyrgyz
lo Laothian
la Latin
lv Latvian
ln Lingala
lt Lithuanian
loz Lozi
lg Luganda
ach Luo
lb Luxembourgish
mk Macedonian
mg Malagasy
ms Malay
ml Malayalam
mt Maltese
mi Maori
mr Marathi
mfe Mauritian Creole
mo Moldavian
mn Mongolian
my Myanmar (Burmese)
sr-ME Montenegrin
ne Nepali
pcm Nigerian Pidgin
nso Northern Sotho
no Norwegian
nn Norwegian (Nynorsk)
oc Occitan
or Oriya
om Oromo
ps Pashto
fa Persian
pl Polish
pt-BR Portuguese (Brazil)
pt Portuguese (Portugal)
pa Punjabi
qu Quechua
ro Romanian
rm Romansh
nyn Runyakitara
ru Russian
sm Samoan
gd Scots Gaelic
sr Serbian
sh Serbo-Croatian
st Sesotho
tn Setswana
crs Seychellois Creole
sn Shona
sd Sindhi
si Sinhalese
sk Slovak
sl Slovenian
so Somali
es Spanish
es-419 Spanish (Latin American)
su Sundanese
sw Swahili
sv Swedish
tg Tajik
ta Tamil
tt Tatar
te Telugu
th Thai
ti Tigrinya
to Tonga
lua Tshiluba
tum Tumbuka
tr Turkish
tk Turkmen
tw Twi
ug Uighur
uk Ukrainian
ur Urdu
uz Uzbek
vi Vietnamese
cy Welsh
wo Wolof
xh Xhosa
yi Yiddish
yo Yoruba
zu Zulu
Would you like to inspect the original subtitles? These are the user uploaded subtitles that are being translated: 1 00:00:01,268 --> 00:00:02,868 Cut the wheel. There you go. 2 00:00:02,870 --> 00:00:04,203 Good job. A little more. 3 00:00:04,339 --> 00:00:06,138 A little more. Right there. Right there. 4 00:00:06,273 --> 00:00:09,208 [laughing] Hey! Yes. 5 00:00:09,210 --> 00:00:10,943 Way to go, honey. I love it. 6 00:00:11,078 --> 00:00:12,345 - Yes. - Come here. 7 00:00:12,479 --> 00:00:13,812 I'm so proud of you. Come here. 8 00:00:13,814 --> 00:00:15,214 [smooching] I want a kiss from you. 9 00:00:15,216 --> 00:00:16,459 Come on, baby. - Jeez, stop. 10 00:00:16,483 --> 00:00:17,816 - Oh, I love you. - Let go of me. 11 00:00:17,818 --> 00:00:20,886 - You're my baby. - Hey, get off me. 12 00:00:20,888 --> 00:00:21,888 - [smooching] 13 00:00:21,956 --> 00:00:23,689 - Oh, you have got to be kidding me. 14 00:00:23,824 --> 00:00:25,891 In what world do you think it's okay 15 00:00:25,893 --> 00:00:27,626 to speak to a female employee that way? 16 00:00:27,628 --> 00:00:29,428 - No, sir, you don't understand. 17 00:00:29,430 --> 00:00:32,165 - And you certainly don't touch them inappropriately like that. 18 00:00:32,299 --> 00:00:33,498 - Oh, uh... 19 00:00:33,634 --> 00:00:34,945 - The city is gonna hear about this. 20 00:00:34,969 --> 00:00:36,169 - Hold on a second. 21 00:00:36,303 --> 00:00:38,063 - I got your back, female firefighter. 22 00:00:38,773 --> 00:00:40,373 - Can we still go get ice cream? 23 00:00:40,441 --> 00:00:42,107 - Yeah, okay. Who's driving? 24 00:00:42,109 --> 00:00:43,709 - Me! [whoops] 25 00:00:43,711 --> 00:00:46,912 [Foreigner's "Hot Blooded"] 26 00:00:46,914 --> 00:00:50,649 ♪ ♪ 27 00:00:50,785 --> 00:00:53,386 - ♪ Well, I'm hot-blooded ♪ 28 00:00:53,520 --> 00:00:56,188 ♪ Check it and see ♪ 29 00:00:56,323 --> 00:00:59,658 ♪ I got a fever of 103 ♪ 30 00:00:59,794 --> 00:01:02,728 ♪ I'm hot-blooded ♪ 31 00:01:03,398 --> 00:01:05,530 [light music] 32 00:01:05,532 --> 00:01:07,266 - Hey. Still studying, Luce? 33 00:01:07,402 --> 00:01:11,136 - I got the test today. - Second time's the charm, huh? 34 00:01:11,272 --> 00:01:12,337 [laughter] - Yeah. 35 00:01:12,339 --> 00:01:13,806 Well, I'm still gonna be 36 00:01:13,941 --> 00:01:16,341 the first female at Station 24 with a 2Q license. 37 00:01:16,343 --> 00:01:18,077 And then you better watch out, Ike, 38 00:01:18,079 --> 00:01:19,945 because I'm gonna be driving that engine. 39 00:01:19,947 --> 00:01:21,546 - Whoo, scary. 40 00:01:21,548 --> 00:01:22,859 Just remember, the mirrors in there, 41 00:01:22,883 --> 00:01:24,483 they're not for checking your makeup. 42 00:01:24,551 --> 00:01:26,551 - [laughs] Yeah. And no selfies while driving. 43 00:01:26,687 --> 00:01:28,331 - Y'all ever hear about the female driver 44 00:01:28,355 --> 00:01:29,554 that ran out of gas? 45 00:01:29,556 --> 00:01:32,224 She thought the car ran on emotions. 46 00:01:32,359 --> 00:01:33,692 - [laughs sarcastically] 47 00:01:33,694 --> 00:01:35,072 Yeah, keep laughing, Granny, because next, 48 00:01:35,096 --> 00:01:36,339 I'm gonna get my paramedic license, 49 00:01:36,363 --> 00:01:38,030 and then you'll be out of work. 50 00:01:38,165 --> 00:01:39,410 All: Ooh. - What? Can she do that? 51 00:01:39,434 --> 00:01:40,766 - Lucy, I'm rooting for you. 52 00:01:40,768 --> 00:01:42,345 I love a woman who drives a truck. 53 00:01:42,369 --> 00:01:44,347 Actually, it's on my list of Penisi's top qualities. 54 00:01:44,371 --> 00:01:45,771 [ding] 55 00:01:45,773 --> 00:01:47,172 - What are some of the other ones, Cap? 56 00:01:47,174 --> 00:01:49,442 A woman who doesn't "mess with my hair"? 57 00:01:49,576 --> 00:01:51,710 [laughter] 58 00:01:51,846 --> 00:01:53,606 - Actually, there are several things 59 00:01:53,648 --> 00:01:55,380 I find irresistible in a woman. 60 00:01:55,516 --> 00:01:56,516 For example, 61 00:01:56,583 --> 00:01:58,517 I like female commuters 62 00:01:58,519 --> 00:02:00,586 who wear business suits and sneakers. 63 00:02:00,721 --> 00:02:03,989 I'm a sucker for girls who like Patrick Swayze movies. 64 00:02:03,991 --> 00:02:05,324 - I like that too. 65 00:02:05,326 --> 00:02:06,992 - I love tall women. 6 feet and up. 66 00:02:06,994 --> 00:02:08,914 - I actually worked with an exotic dancer once 67 00:02:08,996 --> 00:02:10,395 who was over 7 feet tall. 68 00:02:10,397 --> 00:02:11,530 You know what her name was? 69 00:02:11,532 --> 00:02:13,732 Andrea the Giant. - Whoa. 70 00:02:13,734 --> 00:02:16,269 - Her G-string was like a parasail. 71 00:02:16,403 --> 00:02:17,270 - Where is she now? 72 00:02:17,404 --> 00:02:19,204 - She fell off a cliff. 73 00:02:19,340 --> 00:02:20,606 - [exhales] 74 00:02:20,741 --> 00:02:22,541 - The city takes sexual harassment complaints 75 00:02:22,543 --> 00:02:23,943 very seriously. 76 00:02:24,078 --> 00:02:25,478 - Councilwoman, 77 00:02:25,612 --> 00:02:27,190 you cannot sexually harass your own daughter. 78 00:02:27,214 --> 00:02:29,059 - We both know the TFD has a lot of ground to make up 79 00:02:29,083 --> 00:02:31,016 when it comes to gender equality. 80 00:02:31,152 --> 00:02:32,152 - Oh, really? 81 00:02:32,219 --> 00:02:33,352 Did you know we're about to get 82 00:02:33,354 --> 00:02:35,420 our first female engine driver? 83 00:02:35,556 --> 00:02:38,757 - Cool. Welcome to the 19th century. 84 00:02:38,759 --> 00:02:40,693 This shift hasn't had sexual bias training 85 00:02:40,828 --> 00:02:41,894 in over four years, 86 00:02:42,029 --> 00:02:43,749 and now you have a female firefighter. 87 00:02:43,831 --> 00:02:45,364 So I've arranged for a counselor 88 00:02:45,366 --> 00:02:46,699 to run a session today. 89 00:02:46,834 --> 00:02:49,402 - Today? What if we're busy? 90 00:02:50,237 --> 00:02:52,605 - Make some time... sweetie. 91 00:02:54,309 --> 00:02:56,008 [cries out] - Oh! 92 00:02:58,445 --> 00:03:00,379 Might wanna get that fixed! 93 00:03:00,381 --> 00:03:02,247 - I can call my daughter "sweetie." 94 00:03:02,249 --> 00:03:04,129 - And you know who else I think is hot? 95 00:03:04,251 --> 00:03:05,584 Marge Simpson, 96 00:03:05,720 --> 00:03:07,230 but that's really about the blue hair 97 00:03:07,254 --> 00:03:09,054 because I love blue hair. 98 00:03:09,190 --> 00:03:10,789 I love a woman who eats with her hands, 99 00:03:10,791 --> 00:03:12,791 and I love a woman who likes black coffee. 100 00:03:12,927 --> 00:03:14,305 - [snoring] - Hey, everybody. 101 00:03:14,329 --> 00:03:15,594 I just met with Linda Price. 102 00:03:15,730 --> 00:03:17,107 - What? Is she still here? - She's gone. 103 00:03:17,131 --> 00:03:18,463 - Whew. 104 00:03:18,465 --> 00:03:19,576 - What does she check on your list? 105 00:03:19,600 --> 00:03:20,760 - Municipal authority figure. 106 00:03:20,868 --> 00:03:22,267 - Oh, that's so specific. 107 00:03:22,269 --> 00:03:23,536 - She has ordered us to undergo 108 00:03:23,671 --> 00:03:25,804 a sexual bias training session today. 109 00:03:25,806 --> 00:03:26,939 - I told you not to kiss me. 110 00:03:27,074 --> 00:03:28,251 - I can kiss you whatever I want! 111 00:03:28,275 --> 00:03:29,742 You're my daughter. 112 00:03:29,877 --> 00:03:31,410 The instructor will be here shortly. 113 00:03:31,412 --> 00:03:32,878 - Okay. 114 00:03:32,880 --> 00:03:34,257 - Ugh, is this gonna be more role-playing? 115 00:03:34,281 --> 00:03:35,659 - Are they gonna check our social media? 116 00:03:35,683 --> 00:03:36,749 - Guys, stop. 117 00:03:36,884 --> 00:03:38,083 As the most woke person here, 118 00:03:38,219 --> 00:03:40,085 I can tell you that sexual bias training 119 00:03:40,087 --> 00:03:41,754 is something we can all learn from, 120 00:03:41,889 --> 00:03:44,357 especially a chief who hugs his female employees. 121 00:03:44,491 --> 00:03:46,051 - Watch it. Next time, I'll hug you. 122 00:03:46,093 --> 00:03:48,071 - Yeah, and I'll hug you back because I'm that woke. 123 00:03:48,095 --> 00:03:50,295 - [growls] - Why are you growling? 124 00:03:50,297 --> 00:03:51,931 - [growls] 125 00:03:52,900 --> 00:03:54,634 [sighing] 126 00:03:55,170 --> 00:03:57,036 Oh, Jesus! Come on. 127 00:03:57,171 --> 00:04:00,573 Ah, sheep shit! - You okay, Chief? 128 00:04:00,708 --> 00:04:02,775 - Ah, I just spilt my coffee over the rug. 129 00:04:02,910 --> 00:04:04,710 - Oh, man. Yeah, right there? 130 00:04:04,845 --> 00:04:06,623 - No, actually, that's when Eddie tried to surprise me 131 00:04:06,647 --> 00:04:08,581 on my birthday in his birthday suit... oof. 132 00:04:08,716 --> 00:04:09,893 - Oh, there it is. - Nope. 133 00:04:09,917 --> 00:04:11,294 That is when Eddie tried to show me 134 00:04:11,318 --> 00:04:12,763 how bouncy his new Super Ball was. 135 00:04:12,787 --> 00:04:14,031 It's actually this one over here. 136 00:04:14,055 --> 00:04:15,654 - Oh, man. - It's a freshy. 137 00:04:15,790 --> 00:04:17,901 - Why don't you just get a new carpet in here, Chief? 138 00:04:17,925 --> 00:04:19,836 - Ah, I don't know; it's such a headache, you know? 139 00:04:19,860 --> 00:04:21,304 Those carpet guys are always trying to rip you off. 140 00:04:21,328 --> 00:04:23,328 - You do know that Andy's side job is selling carpet 141 00:04:23,330 --> 00:04:24,908 for his uncle's carpet company, right? 142 00:04:24,932 --> 00:04:25,998 - Huh. 143 00:04:26,133 --> 00:04:27,911 - I'm sure he'd give you a great deal, Chief. 144 00:04:27,935 --> 00:04:29,512 - I never really think of Andy outside of this building. 145 00:04:29,536 --> 00:04:30,669 - Andy! 146 00:04:30,671 --> 00:04:31,670 - Maybe I should just flip it over. 147 00:04:31,672 --> 00:04:33,138 - Andy! - Hey! 148 00:04:33,274 --> 00:04:34,514 - What's up? - Ah. 149 00:04:34,541 --> 00:04:36,221 - Chief needs a new carpet, right? 150 00:04:36,343 --> 00:04:37,876 That's you, baby. 151 00:04:37,878 --> 00:04:39,522 - Eh, I don't like to mix business with business. 152 00:04:39,546 --> 00:04:40,679 - Neither do I. 153 00:04:40,815 --> 00:04:41,858 Actually, I'm a very tough customer 154 00:04:41,882 --> 00:04:43,416 and a very savvy customer. 155 00:04:43,550 --> 00:04:45,796 I just figured if you're gonna give me a sweet deal, well... 156 00:04:45,820 --> 00:04:47,152 - Of course I would. 157 00:04:47,154 --> 00:04:48,154 The problem is, 158 00:04:48,289 --> 00:04:49,488 I give my friends too sweet of a deal, 159 00:04:49,490 --> 00:04:50,756 and then my uncle gets mad. 160 00:04:50,891 --> 00:04:52,157 - Well, we're not really friends, right? 161 00:04:52,159 --> 00:04:54,293 I mean, huh? Not friends? Wink, wink. 162 00:04:54,295 --> 00:04:56,006 Uh-huh. You know what I mean? - [laughs] 163 00:04:56,030 --> 00:04:57,963 No, no, we're not. - Yeah. All right. 164 00:04:58,099 --> 00:05:00,433 - Yeah. Okay, let's do it. I'll hook you up. 165 00:05:00,567 --> 00:05:02,567 - Ah, you'll hook me up. I love that. 166 00:05:02,569 --> 00:05:03,702 - Let's do it. - It all worked out. 167 00:05:03,704 --> 00:05:05,370 That's awesome. - Yeah. 168 00:05:05,372 --> 00:05:07,551 Let's stop standing around and let's get back to work. 169 00:05:07,575 --> 00:05:10,909 I'd love to talk some more, but I don't wanna anymore. 170 00:05:10,911 --> 00:05:12,756 - Hey, Luce, if you need any help learning how 171 00:05:12,780 --> 00:05:14,780 to read a map, you can ask any one of us. 172 00:05:14,782 --> 00:05:16,315 [all hollering] - Oh, wow. Thanks. 173 00:05:16,317 --> 00:05:18,383 Coming from the guy who thought that AM radio 174 00:05:18,385 --> 00:05:19,518 only played in the morning. 175 00:05:19,520 --> 00:05:20,853 All: Oh! [laughter] 176 00:05:20,988 --> 00:05:22,721 - You're thinking of someone else. 177 00:05:22,857 --> 00:05:24,723 I know it means "after midnight." 178 00:05:24,725 --> 00:05:26,392 [door clicks open] 179 00:05:27,328 --> 00:05:30,263 - Hi, everyone. I'm Courtney Brixton. 180 00:05:30,397 --> 00:05:34,399 I'm your sexual bias training instructor. 181 00:05:34,535 --> 00:05:36,401 ♪ ♪ 182 00:05:36,537 --> 00:05:38,471 How is it going? 183 00:05:38,605 --> 00:05:40,072 - Hi. - Hi. How are you? 184 00:05:40,207 --> 00:05:41,874 - Nice to meet you. - Hi. 185 00:05:42,009 --> 00:05:44,209 Oh, do you need some help with that, Captain? 186 00:05:44,345 --> 00:05:47,212 I got it. It's a little high. [both chuckle] 187 00:05:47,214 --> 00:05:49,392 - I hope you're still here when I need to wipe up a spill. 188 00:05:49,416 --> 00:05:52,417 - [laughs] 189 00:05:52,419 --> 00:05:54,219 - Oh, God, I needed a laugh. 190 00:05:54,221 --> 00:05:56,822 Oh, I hope it's okay that I parked my truck out back. 191 00:05:56,957 --> 00:05:59,024 I just could not find a spot. 192 00:05:59,026 --> 00:06:01,694 I mean, just the bed is so wide. 193 00:06:01,829 --> 00:06:04,297 Okay. 194 00:06:04,431 --> 00:06:06,632 Ready to get started, Captain? 195 00:06:06,767 --> 00:06:07,900 - Um, yeah. 196 00:06:08,035 --> 00:06:09,768 [ding] Yeah. 197 00:06:09,904 --> 00:06:12,705 Let me, uh, get you set up in the meeting room. 198 00:06:12,840 --> 00:06:14,639 Right this way. - Okay. 199 00:06:14,641 --> 00:06:16,375 I'll just follow you. 200 00:06:16,511 --> 00:06:18,777 - See you in there. - Okay! See you in a bit. 201 00:06:18,913 --> 00:06:22,114 - Tall, sneakers, truck, and hair. 202 00:06:22,249 --> 00:06:23,648 She hit him with the knockout combo. 203 00:06:23,650 --> 00:06:24,650 - Yeah. 204 00:06:24,785 --> 00:06:25,945 I hope he can appreciate that 205 00:06:26,053 --> 00:06:27,786 that's the sexual harassment teacher. 206 00:06:27,788 --> 00:06:29,454 - Oh, man. - [laughing] 207 00:06:29,456 --> 00:06:31,056 - Wait, wait, wait, he wouldn't make a move, would he? 208 00:06:31,058 --> 00:06:33,592 - On his dream girl? [sarcastically] No. 209 00:06:33,594 --> 00:06:36,929 [laughter] 210 00:06:37,064 --> 00:06:38,775 We should keep an eye on him. - No, yeah. For sure. 211 00:06:38,799 --> 00:06:40,043 - Of course. - Absolutely. Absolutely. 212 00:06:40,067 --> 00:06:41,578 - I'm definitely going to keep my... 213 00:06:41,602 --> 00:06:43,402 - I'm sure you guys think this is just gonna be 214 00:06:43,404 --> 00:06:45,738 another boring corporate presentation, 215 00:06:45,873 --> 00:06:49,141 and I assure you, it is gonna be exactly that. 216 00:06:49,276 --> 00:06:52,545 But I will try to make it short. 217 00:06:52,680 --> 00:06:54,680 Hmm. I prefer shag carpet. 218 00:06:54,682 --> 00:06:56,615 [laughter] 219 00:06:56,617 --> 00:06:57,950 Whew. All right. 220 00:06:58,085 --> 00:06:59,284 I would normally be reading 221 00:06:59,420 --> 00:07:01,286 about two hours of stuff to you guys, 222 00:07:01,288 --> 00:07:02,933 but what if we just talk some shit 223 00:07:02,957 --> 00:07:04,735 and get out of here as quickly as possible? 224 00:07:04,759 --> 00:07:05,936 - Cool. - Does that sound good? 225 00:07:05,960 --> 00:07:07,270 - Take your time. - Yes, ma'am. 226 00:07:07,294 --> 00:07:08,605 - I know you think you're being played, 227 00:07:08,629 --> 00:07:09,669 but don't call me "ma'am." 228 00:07:09,697 --> 00:07:11,230 Calling me "ma'am," 229 00:07:11,232 --> 00:07:13,344 that's like putting an elevator in an outhouse. 230 00:07:13,368 --> 00:07:14,700 It don't belong. 231 00:07:14,835 --> 00:07:16,146 - Did you just quote "Road House"? 232 00:07:16,170 --> 00:07:18,637 - I did. [laughs] Thank you for noticing. 233 00:07:18,773 --> 00:07:20,573 I have this tic where I just, like, 234 00:07:20,708 --> 00:07:22,775 quote Patrick Swayze movies. 235 00:07:22,910 --> 00:07:24,643 I'm crazy for Swayze, I know. 236 00:07:24,645 --> 00:07:26,379 - [dreamily] No way-ze. - Okay. 237 00:07:26,513 --> 00:07:30,115 So has anyone ever heard of a term called unconscious bias? 238 00:07:30,117 --> 00:07:32,718 - Oh, I'm not sure. Why don't you run it "bi-us"? 239 00:07:32,720 --> 00:07:35,721 - [laughing] - Woof. 240 00:07:36,057 --> 00:07:39,725 - Okay. Let's dive in. - [sighs happily] 241 00:07:39,860 --> 00:07:42,061 She is perfect. 242 00:07:42,063 --> 00:07:43,863 Absolutely perfect. [exhales] 243 00:07:43,998 --> 00:07:46,131 Blue hair with streaks of purple... ooh. Tall... 244 00:07:46,267 --> 00:07:49,001 - Yeah, congrats on kind of keeping yourself under control. 245 00:07:49,136 --> 00:07:50,202 - I'm not an idiot. 246 00:07:50,337 --> 00:07:52,605 She's the sexual bias instructor. 247 00:07:52,740 --> 00:07:54,073 - Hey, sorry to interrupt. 248 00:07:54,208 --> 00:07:56,275 It's just, is there a lady's bathroom anywhere? 249 00:07:56,411 --> 00:07:57,877 - Mm, not really, 250 00:07:58,012 --> 00:07:59,723 but the closest thing's down the hall, to the right. 251 00:07:59,747 --> 00:08:00,946 - Cool. Thanks. 252 00:08:00,948 --> 00:08:02,393 - Oh, hey, Courtney. - Yes? 253 00:08:02,417 --> 00:08:04,127 - We're about to have lunch. Are you hungry? 254 00:08:04,151 --> 00:08:06,151 - Oh, I couldn't. Thank you, though. 255 00:08:06,287 --> 00:08:08,353 - Hold on, hold on. I'm cooking something special. 256 00:08:08,355 --> 00:08:10,133 And I was thinking maybe you could help us find 257 00:08:10,157 --> 00:08:12,691 some more of our blind spots, because we got some. 258 00:08:12,693 --> 00:08:14,093 - Sure. 259 00:08:14,095 --> 00:08:16,561 I don't have a ton of time, but it's a deal. 260 00:08:16,563 --> 00:08:17,630 You better be a good cook. 261 00:08:17,765 --> 00:08:19,232 - The best. 262 00:08:19,366 --> 00:08:21,234 - Okay. 263 00:08:21,702 --> 00:08:23,302 - Boy, is you stuck on stupid? 264 00:08:23,438 --> 00:08:25,104 We just got done with that seminar. 265 00:08:25,239 --> 00:08:26,839 - With all your woman driver jokes, 266 00:08:26,974 --> 00:08:28,974 I'm thinking maybe you need to learn some more. 267 00:08:28,976 --> 00:08:30,843 - Uh-uh, stop. We see what you're doing. 268 00:08:30,978 --> 00:08:32,177 - I'm not doing anything. 269 00:08:32,313 --> 00:08:33,712 Although, it has occurred to me 270 00:08:33,714 --> 00:08:35,180 that it's not harassment 271 00:08:35,316 --> 00:08:37,983 if I get her to ask me out. 272 00:08:38,119 --> 00:08:39,918 [laughter] - Son of a bitch. 273 00:08:39,920 --> 00:08:41,386 - You think you're gonna get 274 00:08:41,522 --> 00:08:43,522 the sexual harassment instructor to ask you out 275 00:08:43,590 --> 00:08:45,258 after the sexual harassment class? 276 00:08:45,392 --> 00:08:46,992 - I'm already doing well with stage one: 277 00:08:46,994 --> 00:08:48,461 non-flirting flirting. 278 00:08:48,596 --> 00:08:50,195 - Non-flirting flirting? 279 00:08:50,197 --> 00:08:51,664 - It's master-level stuff. 280 00:08:51,799 --> 00:08:53,110 - Yeah; that's where I hit on her 281 00:08:53,134 --> 00:08:54,711 without actually hitting on her. 282 00:08:54,735 --> 00:08:56,068 It's so imperceptible. 283 00:08:56,203 --> 00:08:57,848 She doesn't even realize it's already working. 284 00:08:57,872 --> 00:09:00,273 - Like carbon monoxide. - Exactly. 285 00:09:00,941 --> 00:09:02,875 I gotta go cook lunch. - Okay. 286 00:09:03,010 --> 00:09:04,610 - It ain't gonna work! 287 00:09:04,745 --> 00:09:07,012 That ain't gonna work. She's a trained professional. 288 00:09:07,014 --> 00:09:08,481 - I don't know, man. 289 00:09:08,616 --> 00:09:10,683 I think Cap could pull it off. 290 00:09:10,818 --> 00:09:11,995 - Put your money where your mouth is. 291 00:09:12,019 --> 00:09:13,552 - Wait, you guys, don't you think 292 00:09:13,554 --> 00:09:15,532 we should be putting a stop to these Cap moves? 293 00:09:15,556 --> 00:09:18,824 - 50 bucks says Cap gets her to ask him out. 294 00:09:18,826 --> 00:09:20,693 - Deal. - Boom. 295 00:09:20,828 --> 00:09:21,939 - Have you guys learned nothing? 296 00:09:21,963 --> 00:09:23,523 - What you mean? - About what? 297 00:09:25,566 --> 00:09:26,865 - All right. 298 00:09:26,867 --> 00:09:28,400 Johnny, get some measurements in here. 299 00:09:28,402 --> 00:09:29,980 Carl, let's see what the subfloor looks like, huh? 300 00:09:30,004 --> 00:09:31,204 Let's move. - Wow. 301 00:09:31,271 --> 00:09:32,449 There's a different Andy, huh? 302 00:09:32,473 --> 00:09:34,184 - Chief, did you look at the book? 303 00:09:34,208 --> 00:09:35,474 - The sample book? Yeah, I got it right here. 304 00:09:35,476 --> 00:09:37,075 I was thinking about a medium pile. 305 00:09:37,077 --> 00:09:38,655 - No, you don't want a medium pile. 306 00:09:38,679 --> 00:09:40,056 You want a low pile. This is a high-traffic area. 307 00:09:40,080 --> 00:09:41,547 What about color? 308 00:09:41,682 --> 00:09:43,762 - I thought Raspberry Tart looked pretty tasty. 309 00:09:43,818 --> 00:09:45,017 - Too dark. 310 00:09:45,153 --> 00:09:46,463 You want something in the beige family, 311 00:09:46,487 --> 00:09:48,327 like Tuscan Marvel or the Sedona Tidewater. 312 00:09:48,422 --> 00:09:50,222 - Oh, okay. Tuscan. Marvel looks nice. 313 00:09:50,358 --> 00:09:52,090 - Tuscan Marvel it is. Good choice. 314 00:09:52,092 --> 00:09:53,804 - Very similar to what I have. - Tuscan Marvel. 315 00:09:53,828 --> 00:09:55,561 Good choice. 316 00:09:55,696 --> 00:09:56,762 - Okay, Tuscan Marvel. 317 00:09:56,897 --> 00:09:58,697 - Johnny! What's taking so long, man? 318 00:09:58,699 --> 00:10:00,967 It's just a simple measurement. It's 17, 3. 319 00:10:01,101 --> 00:10:02,568 - Hah. 17, 3. 320 00:10:02,703 --> 00:10:04,481 You just saw that? - I can eyeball that. 321 00:10:04,505 --> 00:10:06,905 - I bet you're way off. - Johnny, bring it over. 322 00:10:07,041 --> 00:10:08,507 - Oh. 323 00:10:08,509 --> 00:10:10,643 Whoa, right on the money. How'd you do that? 324 00:10:10,778 --> 00:10:13,179 - It's what I do. - Huh! Wow. 325 00:10:13,313 --> 00:10:15,425 - Okay, well, I was thinking about this brand right here. 326 00:10:15,449 --> 00:10:17,049 - No, I wouldn't even wipe my feet with that. 327 00:10:17,051 --> 00:10:18,651 I'd go with this brand. 328 00:10:18,653 --> 00:10:20,653 It's a dollar more per yard, but it's well worth it. 329 00:10:20,655 --> 00:10:22,054 - Okay, stop, stop, stop. 330 00:10:22,190 --> 00:10:23,522 I know what you're trying to do, Andy. 331 00:10:23,524 --> 00:10:26,792 I don't need the more expensive one. 332 00:10:26,927 --> 00:10:29,996 - Ah, look at that beauty of a family. 333 00:10:30,130 --> 00:10:31,530 You and your four daughters. 334 00:10:31,666 --> 00:10:33,310 - Well, that's my wife. Of course you know that. 335 00:10:33,334 --> 00:10:37,203 - Man, how old are they now? Like, what, 20-ish? 336 00:10:37,338 --> 00:10:39,071 - The younger ones are teenagers. 337 00:10:39,073 --> 00:10:40,339 - Teenagers, yeah. - And Lucy is, you know, Lucy. 338 00:10:40,341 --> 00:10:42,274 - Sure. Lucy is Lucy. - Yeah. 339 00:10:42,276 --> 00:10:44,677 - You probably only get the best for your daughters. 340 00:10:44,679 --> 00:10:46,278 - I do, yeah. Mm-hmm. 341 00:10:46,280 --> 00:10:48,124 - You should get the best for yourself. 342 00:10:48,148 --> 00:10:49,748 I mean you are the chief, right? 343 00:10:49,750 --> 00:10:50,883 - Yeah. 344 00:10:51,019 --> 00:10:52,951 - This brand is so high quality, 345 00:10:53,087 --> 00:10:54,953 you'll actually be saving money. 346 00:10:55,089 --> 00:10:57,089 - Saving money? - Yeah. 347 00:10:57,225 --> 00:10:59,358 - Okay, well... - Okay! Let's do that. 348 00:10:59,493 --> 00:11:01,159 And let's get some of this stuff out of here. 349 00:11:01,161 --> 00:11:03,161 Come on, chop, chop. Let's go. 350 00:11:03,297 --> 00:11:05,898 [traditional Italian music] - Lunch is served. 351 00:11:06,034 --> 00:11:08,367 - Wow. - Cioppino Penisi. 352 00:11:08,369 --> 00:11:12,304 Il pesce piu fresco per tutto Tacoma. 353 00:11:12,306 --> 00:11:13,972 - You speak Italian? - Eh. 354 00:11:14,108 --> 00:11:16,508 Un pochino. Mangiate, per favore. 355 00:11:16,510 --> 00:11:18,577 - God, you guys get crab legs for lunch? 356 00:11:18,713 --> 00:11:20,579 I love crab legs. 357 00:11:20,581 --> 00:11:23,449 Do you mind if I eat with my hands, or... 358 00:11:23,584 --> 00:11:24,961 - Yeah, of course. - Oh, okay! 359 00:11:24,985 --> 00:11:26,318 Because they're way better 360 00:11:26,320 --> 00:11:27,564 when you're just eating with your hands. 361 00:11:27,588 --> 00:11:29,988 Look how soft. 362 00:11:30,124 --> 00:11:32,190 Mmm! Oh, my God. 363 00:11:32,192 --> 00:11:33,459 Splendido. 364 00:11:33,594 --> 00:11:35,039 - Grazie, Courtney. Mangiamo. 365 00:11:35,063 --> 00:11:37,463 - Mmm! 366 00:11:37,598 --> 00:11:39,398 - Yeah, there's cracks all along here. 367 00:11:39,533 --> 00:11:40,599 Do you see those? 368 00:11:40,601 --> 00:11:42,200 - Look at those cracks over there. 369 00:11:42,202 --> 00:11:43,447 - So many cracks. Cracks here, cracks there. 370 00:11:43,471 --> 00:11:44,803 I mean, they're... - Wow. Okay. 371 00:11:44,805 --> 00:11:46,338 - The whole floor. - I mean, 372 00:11:46,340 --> 00:11:48,184 and then there's a bunch of cracks over here, Chief. 373 00:11:48,208 --> 00:11:49,653 - Cracks everywhere. - Yeah. 374 00:11:49,677 --> 00:11:51,388 This would usually cost you so much more, 375 00:11:51,412 --> 00:11:53,879 but I'm gonna absorb the patchwork on my end. 376 00:11:54,014 --> 00:11:55,147 Okay, Chief? 377 00:11:55,149 --> 00:11:56,749 - Yeah, okay. - Just for you. 378 00:11:56,751 --> 00:11:59,217 Carl! Let me see that. 379 00:11:59,353 --> 00:12:00,993 Where did you get this blade, huh? 380 00:12:01,089 --> 00:12:02,688 The bottom of a cereal box? 381 00:12:03,223 --> 00:12:04,623 Go. Get a new blade! 382 00:12:04,759 --> 00:12:07,493 You're embarrassing me. Blades are cheap! 383 00:12:08,162 --> 00:12:11,697 Johnny. Thank you so much. 384 00:12:11,832 --> 00:12:13,165 Mmm! 385 00:12:13,167 --> 00:12:16,235 Johnny, nice "cappuccins." 386 00:12:16,370 --> 00:12:19,105 You want one of these, Chief? - Nope. I'm good. 387 00:12:19,239 --> 00:12:20,884 That's how we got here in the first place. 388 00:12:20,908 --> 00:12:22,574 [both laughing] 389 00:12:22,576 --> 00:12:23,909 - Man, nice one. 390 00:12:24,044 --> 00:12:26,512 So funny, Chief. You are so funny. 391 00:12:26,647 --> 00:12:29,982 So we have you done for the super-blend poly adhesive. 392 00:12:29,984 --> 00:12:32,318 I also have you down for that stain guard coating. 393 00:12:32,453 --> 00:12:36,322 - Oh, I don't need that. - Chief, it's only $50 more. 394 00:12:36,457 --> 00:12:38,924 Plus I'm absorbing all of the patchwork 395 00:12:39,059 --> 00:12:40,504 and you're not getting padding in here. 396 00:12:40,528 --> 00:12:42,261 I wouldn't skimp on the stain guard. 397 00:12:42,396 --> 00:12:43,640 - Stop with the upselling, Andy. 398 00:12:43,664 --> 00:12:44,931 You think I don't get it? 399 00:12:45,065 --> 00:12:46,865 I'm a savvy customer. 400 00:12:46,867 --> 00:12:48,244 I'm not gonna pay the extra costs. 401 00:12:48,268 --> 00:12:50,202 - Wow! You did it. You got me. 402 00:12:50,204 --> 00:12:52,939 - Yeah. - Boy, you are good. 403 00:12:53,073 --> 00:12:54,873 - I've never seen Salesman Andy before. 404 00:12:54,875 --> 00:12:56,408 It's kinda weird. 405 00:12:56,410 --> 00:12:58,455 - Well, they have a saying in the carpet business, 406 00:12:58,479 --> 00:13:01,480 "You show weakness, you get walked on." 407 00:13:01,615 --> 00:13:03,855 - [chuckling] Okay. All right. Well, you know what? 408 00:13:03,884 --> 00:13:06,152 I can see it a mile away. So don't waste your time. 409 00:13:06,287 --> 00:13:07,998 - I'm not gonna waste any more of your time. 410 00:13:08,022 --> 00:13:10,356 You just need to pick a scent for the carpet deodorizer. 411 00:13:10,491 --> 00:13:12,491 - Okay, I don't need any carpet deodorizer. 412 00:13:12,627 --> 00:13:14,467 - What about the smell in here, Chief? 413 00:13:14,495 --> 00:13:17,229 - What smell? - Ah, no offense, Chief, 414 00:13:17,231 --> 00:13:20,232 but it smells like breath and hot dog water in here. 415 00:13:20,368 --> 00:13:22,568 - Hot-dog water? - No. Hot dog water. 416 00:13:22,703 --> 00:13:24,703 Everybody's talking about it. Trust me. 417 00:13:24,839 --> 00:13:28,040 This is the way to stop the whispering around here. 418 00:13:28,042 --> 00:13:30,442 - Okay. 419 00:13:30,444 --> 00:13:32,310 I think it smells fine in here. 420 00:13:32,312 --> 00:13:33,980 It smells like me. 421 00:13:34,114 --> 00:13:36,182 [upbeat music playing on speaker] 422 00:13:36,316 --> 00:13:38,028 - Hey Captain, do you want some help with that? 423 00:13:38,052 --> 00:13:39,852 - No, no. I love doing dishes. 424 00:13:39,854 --> 00:13:41,119 It's something I'm good at. 425 00:13:41,121 --> 00:13:42,699 - You're also good at making lunch. 426 00:13:42,723 --> 00:13:44,657 - Well, feeding people makes me happy. 427 00:13:44,659 --> 00:13:47,326 - Courtney, can I get you a cup of coffee or something? 428 00:13:47,328 --> 00:13:48,727 - Yeah, just black, though. 429 00:13:48,863 --> 00:13:50,929 [dish clatters loudly] 430 00:13:51,065 --> 00:13:52,531 Are you okay? 431 00:13:52,667 --> 00:13:54,244 - Yeah, yeah, yeah. Everything's fine. 432 00:13:54,268 --> 00:13:57,135 Just listening to the tune. Vibing out. 433 00:13:57,271 --> 00:13:59,538 Man, I feel this one in my bones. 434 00:13:59,674 --> 00:14:02,274 Yeah, you can't help but move to this one. 435 00:14:02,410 --> 00:14:05,878 - Oh, there he goes. - He's a pretty good dancer. 436 00:14:05,880 --> 00:14:08,214 - Oh, yeah? - Hey! Yeah! 437 00:14:08,349 --> 00:14:10,482 - Oh! - Come on. Who's feeling it? 438 00:14:10,618 --> 00:14:12,284 All right. Come on up here. 439 00:14:12,420 --> 00:14:13,930 You don't need a reason to get on the dance floor. 440 00:14:13,954 --> 00:14:15,465 Come on, Ike, you're a dancer. - Yeah, yeah. 441 00:14:15,489 --> 00:14:16,889 I mean... - It'd be weird if I... 442 00:14:16,891 --> 00:14:20,226 - No, it looks fun. - Oh, there we go. 443 00:14:20,361 --> 00:14:22,695 - Whoa. - Come on. Yeah. 444 00:14:22,697 --> 00:14:25,564 Oh, yeah. There we go. - I love dancing, but I can't. 445 00:14:25,700 --> 00:14:27,366 We're working. - Yeah? 446 00:14:27,501 --> 00:14:29,013 Courtney, you know, I used to be a break-dancer. 447 00:14:29,037 --> 00:14:30,436 - Really? - Yeah. 448 00:14:30,571 --> 00:14:31,970 Break-dancing was my thing. 449 00:14:32,106 --> 00:14:33,906 - Really? - Check it out. 450 00:14:34,042 --> 00:14:35,507 - Oh, yeah. - Oh. 451 00:14:35,509 --> 00:14:37,376 - Watch out. Oh, it's going down there. 452 00:14:37,378 --> 00:14:38,977 - Oh. - It's coming back up. 453 00:14:38,979 --> 00:14:41,247 - Whoo. - Whoa, baby. 454 00:14:41,382 --> 00:14:44,316 - Oh, hey what's that? - Oh, that? 455 00:14:45,119 --> 00:14:46,985 - Who put this piece of cardboard here? 456 00:14:46,987 --> 00:14:49,027 - Yeah, I must have left it there by accident. 457 00:14:49,123 --> 00:14:50,723 - That's so weird. 458 00:14:50,858 --> 00:14:52,858 [Run DMC's "It's Tricky" playing on speaker] 459 00:14:52,993 --> 00:14:54,571 - ♪ This beat is my recital, I think it's very vital ♪ 460 00:14:54,595 --> 00:14:56,262 ♪ To rock ♪ - ♪ A rhyme ♪ 461 00:14:56,397 --> 00:14:57,974 - ♪ That's right ♪ - ♪ On time ♪ 462 00:14:57,998 --> 00:14:59,576 - ♪ "It's Tricky" is the title ♪ 463 00:14:59,600 --> 00:15:01,111 - ♪ Here we go! It's tricky ♪ 464 00:15:01,135 --> 00:15:02,801 ♪ To rock a rhyme, to rock a rhyme ♪ 465 00:15:02,803 --> 00:15:05,404 ♪ That's right on time, it's tricky ♪ 466 00:15:05,539 --> 00:15:07,139 ♪ It's tricky ♪ - Whoa! 467 00:15:07,141 --> 00:15:08,874 - ♪ Tricky, tricky, 468 00:15:09,009 --> 00:15:10,787 ♪ It's tricky to rock a rhyme, to rock a rhyme ♪ 469 00:15:10,811 --> 00:15:12,611 ♪ That's right on time, it's tricky ♪ 470 00:15:12,613 --> 00:15:14,058 - ♪ T-t-t-tricky ♪ - ♪ Tricky ♪ 471 00:15:14,082 --> 00:15:15,281 - ♪ Tricky! ♪ 472 00:15:15,416 --> 00:15:16,615 - ♪ I met this little girly ♪ 473 00:15:16,617 --> 00:15:18,817 ♪ Her hair was kind of curly ♪ 474 00:15:18,819 --> 00:15:20,530 ♪ Went to her house and bust her out ♪ 475 00:15:20,554 --> 00:15:22,354 ♪ I had to love real early ♪ 476 00:15:22,356 --> 00:15:23,934 ♪ These girls are really sleazy ♪ 477 00:15:23,958 --> 00:15:25,891 - Oh, oh! - Whoa! 478 00:15:26,026 --> 00:15:27,804 - ♪ Or spend some time and rock a rhyme ♪ 479 00:15:27,828 --> 00:15:29,895 ♪ I said, "It's not that easy" ♪ 480 00:15:30,030 --> 00:15:31,898 ♪ It's tricky to rock a rhyme... ♪ 481 00:15:32,032 --> 00:15:34,032 - They don't call it the break room for nothing. 482 00:15:34,168 --> 00:15:36,502 - Oh, my God. Oh, my God. [laughing] 483 00:15:36,637 --> 00:15:38,170 - Holy shit. 484 00:15:38,306 --> 00:15:39,838 - Oh, my instructor is here. 485 00:15:39,840 --> 00:15:41,573 Time for my test. Wish me, luck guys. 486 00:15:41,575 --> 00:15:44,176 - Good luck, Luce. - Good luck! 487 00:15:44,178 --> 00:15:46,845 - Whoo! - That was awesome. 488 00:15:46,847 --> 00:15:48,647 - Who wants to dance? Come on, Granny. 489 00:15:48,783 --> 00:15:50,849 - Come on, guys. - Come on. 490 00:15:50,985 --> 00:15:52,651 Yeah. All right! Yeah! 491 00:15:52,787 --> 00:15:54,520 - ♪ It's tricky to rock a rhyme ♪ 492 00:15:54,655 --> 00:15:56,166 ♪ To rock a rhyme that's right on time ♪ 493 00:15:56,190 --> 00:15:57,656 ♪ It's tricky! ♪ 494 00:15:57,792 --> 00:15:58,857 ♪ Huh! ♪ 495 00:15:58,859 --> 00:16:00,392 - Wow, it looks like a new office. 496 00:16:00,394 --> 00:16:03,129 - Hah! That's what I said. Oh my, gosh. 497 00:16:03,264 --> 00:16:04,797 Chief, we're on the same page. 498 00:16:04,799 --> 00:16:08,134 - Tuscan Marvel, right? - Good choice. 499 00:16:08,269 --> 00:16:10,669 Well, Chief, it has been a pleasure 500 00:16:10,671 --> 00:16:13,071 so I'm just gonna go ahead and leave that with you. 501 00:16:13,073 --> 00:16:15,541 Okay. Thank you so much. - Great. 502 00:16:15,676 --> 00:16:17,209 Whoa, whoa, whoa. What is this? 503 00:16:17,211 --> 00:16:18,477 A joke? - I'm sorry? 504 00:16:18,612 --> 00:16:20,056 - You said you were gonna hook me up. 505 00:16:20,080 --> 00:16:21,814 - Oh, I did. - This is not a "hook me up." 506 00:16:21,816 --> 00:16:23,727 This is a "hook me down." - I don't know what that means. 507 00:16:23,751 --> 00:16:25,617 - You are gouging me with these add-ons. 508 00:16:25,619 --> 00:16:27,486 - Oh, come on, Chief, you can just spread it around 509 00:16:27,488 --> 00:16:28,821 the station budget, right? 510 00:16:28,823 --> 00:16:30,823 - Spread what around? - The money. 511 00:16:30,959 --> 00:16:32,669 - What do think I am? A mob boss? 512 00:16:32,693 --> 00:16:34,627 - Chief, it feels like a nice office. 513 00:16:34,629 --> 00:16:36,495 This is where a chief should hang out. 514 00:16:36,497 --> 00:16:40,633 Smooth floors. "Oh! I'm the Chief." 515 00:16:40,635 --> 00:16:43,235 Think about that. - I'm not paying for this. 516 00:16:43,237 --> 00:16:45,371 - We'll see. 517 00:16:45,506 --> 00:16:47,373 - [dramatically] If you want the ultimate, 518 00:16:47,508 --> 00:16:49,708 you've got to be willing to pay the ultimate price. 519 00:16:49,710 --> 00:16:51,087 - [dramatically] It's not tragic 520 00:16:51,111 --> 00:16:52,511 to die doing what you love. 521 00:16:52,647 --> 00:16:54,913 - Fucking "Point Break." 522 00:16:55,049 --> 00:16:58,717 - "Point Break"! You get it. - "Point Break." Swayze. 523 00:16:58,853 --> 00:17:00,919 - [laughing] It is the best movie. 524 00:17:01,055 --> 00:17:02,921 - Of all time. 525 00:17:02,923 --> 00:17:05,257 - [exhales] Well, it is a workday. 526 00:17:05,393 --> 00:17:06,859 I should probably head out. 527 00:17:06,995 --> 00:17:09,395 But thank you guys so much. It was good to see you. 528 00:17:09,530 --> 00:17:11,597 - Are you sure you can't stay longer? 529 00:17:11,732 --> 00:17:14,266 Maybe another cup of coffee, black? Hmm? 530 00:17:14,268 --> 00:17:15,934 - No, thanks. 531 00:17:15,936 --> 00:17:18,804 I'm gonna grab my stuff and I'll just see myself out. 532 00:17:18,939 --> 00:17:20,406 - [sighs] 533 00:17:20,541 --> 00:17:22,008 - Oh, man. 534 00:17:22,142 --> 00:17:24,188 That did not go the way I thought it was gonna go. 535 00:17:24,212 --> 00:17:25,878 - I was so subtle and so smooth. 536 00:17:26,014 --> 00:17:27,413 - No, you weren't. 537 00:17:27,548 --> 00:17:29,726 Dude, you made crab legs cioppino for a Tuesday lunch. 538 00:17:29,750 --> 00:17:31,950 - I've done that before. - No, you haven't. 539 00:17:31,952 --> 00:17:33,285 - Guys... 540 00:17:33,287 --> 00:17:34,420 [inspiring music] 541 00:17:34,555 --> 00:17:36,555 Cupid's arrow strikes... 542 00:17:36,691 --> 00:17:40,426 six, maybe seven times in a man's life. 543 00:17:40,561 --> 00:17:42,072 This was my ninth. - [scoffs] 544 00:17:42,096 --> 00:17:43,495 - That means something. 545 00:17:43,497 --> 00:17:45,097 The woman of my dreams just walked out that door 546 00:17:45,099 --> 00:17:46,432 and I may never see her again. 547 00:17:46,567 --> 00:17:48,967 - Mm, tragic. 548 00:17:48,969 --> 00:17:50,236 Tragic. 549 00:17:50,371 --> 00:17:52,038 ♪ ♪ 550 00:17:52,172 --> 00:17:53,873 - [sighs forlornly] 551 00:17:56,644 --> 00:17:58,088 - I order you to lower this bill. 552 00:17:58,112 --> 00:17:59,445 - You're not my carpet boss. 553 00:17:59,447 --> 00:18:00,690 - What the hell happened to you? 554 00:18:00,714 --> 00:18:03,916 This is not the Andy I know. 555 00:18:04,051 --> 00:18:07,052 - [sighs] You're right. 556 00:18:07,054 --> 00:18:09,855 You know, this is why I don't do business with my friends. 557 00:18:09,991 --> 00:18:11,390 This is not me. 558 00:18:11,525 --> 00:18:13,103 It's just a character that I play, 559 00:18:13,127 --> 00:18:14,660 and I hate it. 560 00:18:14,796 --> 00:18:16,262 I love being a firefighter 561 00:18:16,397 --> 00:18:18,530 because I can be Andy Myawani, 562 00:18:18,666 --> 00:18:20,933 not Special K, 563 00:18:21,068 --> 00:18:23,669 the asshole who gets everything done. 564 00:18:23,671 --> 00:18:25,537 I don't want to be that guy. 565 00:18:25,539 --> 00:18:27,739 In the carpet business... 566 00:18:27,875 --> 00:18:30,977 [voice cracks] This is the only way to survive. 567 00:18:32,480 --> 00:18:34,814 - Don't beat yourself up, man. 568 00:18:34,949 --> 00:18:37,617 I know you gotta pay the bills. 569 00:18:37,751 --> 00:18:39,819 When I was your age, I had all kinds of side jobs. 570 00:18:39,953 --> 00:18:42,087 We called them paper routes. [chuckles] 571 00:18:42,223 --> 00:18:43,755 I was a housepainter. 572 00:18:43,757 --> 00:18:46,025 I sold wooden Bibles door-to-door. 573 00:18:46,160 --> 00:18:47,759 - Whoa. 574 00:18:47,761 --> 00:18:49,406 - I drove the Zamboni at the Tacoma Ice Pavilion. 575 00:18:49,430 --> 00:18:50,830 - Oh, cool! 576 00:18:50,964 --> 00:18:53,899 - Listen, Linda Price hated that old carpet. 577 00:18:53,901 --> 00:18:56,702 I bet we could get the city to pick this up. 578 00:18:56,704 --> 00:18:59,171 - Really? - Yeah. Why not? 579 00:18:59,173 --> 00:19:01,707 - I mean, it is a nice carpet. - Tuscan Marvel. 580 00:19:01,709 --> 00:19:03,353 - Yeah, you picked that! - [laughs] 581 00:19:03,377 --> 00:19:05,057 - It'll last you a long time, Chief. 582 00:19:05,179 --> 00:19:06,512 [chuckles] 583 00:19:06,514 --> 00:19:08,447 Especially if you got the fade resistance. 584 00:19:08,582 --> 00:19:09,849 - What was that? 585 00:19:09,983 --> 00:19:12,251 - If you got the fade resistance... 586 00:19:12,386 --> 00:19:14,987 You know, to hold the color forever. 587 00:19:15,122 --> 00:19:17,789 - Is that an add-on? - No, it's not an add-on. 588 00:19:17,791 --> 00:19:20,560 It's just 25 bucks. 589 00:19:21,663 --> 00:19:24,063 A yard. [sighs] Man, thank you. 590 00:19:24,198 --> 00:19:26,318 - [whispering] I'm not paying for this carpet. 591 00:19:26,400 --> 00:19:28,334 ♪ ♪ 592 00:19:28,336 --> 00:19:30,670 - Cap, if Courtney leaving bothers you so much, 593 00:19:30,804 --> 00:19:32,471 do something about it. 594 00:19:32,606 --> 00:19:33,739 - I don't know about that. 595 00:19:33,875 --> 00:19:36,008 Might be best not to poke the bear. 596 00:19:36,010 --> 00:19:37,543 - Did you guys make a bet? - Yes. 597 00:19:37,545 --> 00:19:38,610 - No. - Yes, we did. 598 00:19:38,612 --> 00:19:40,079 - Not cool. Not cool. 599 00:19:40,214 --> 00:19:42,192 - Hey, Eddie, could you meet me out by my truck? 600 00:19:42,216 --> 00:19:44,483 I just have a quick question. Bye, guys. 601 00:19:44,618 --> 00:19:48,688 ♪ ♪ 602 00:19:48,822 --> 00:19:50,756 - "All you gotta do is jump." 603 00:19:50,758 --> 00:19:53,359 Fucking "Point Break." 604 00:19:53,494 --> 00:19:56,028 both: "Point Break." 605 00:19:56,030 --> 00:19:59,031 - Son of a bitch. - Get her, Cap. 606 00:19:59,033 --> 00:20:05,972 ♪ ♪ 607 00:20:07,108 --> 00:20:08,774 - What's up? - Hey. 608 00:20:08,776 --> 00:20:10,442 I just wanted to talk to you in private real quick. 609 00:20:10,444 --> 00:20:11,977 I'm sure you know what I'm gonna say. 610 00:20:11,979 --> 00:20:14,046 - I do. You don't have to say anything. 611 00:20:14,048 --> 00:20:17,049 - Okay. - I feel the exact same way. 612 00:20:17,184 --> 00:20:18,384 I'm into you too, 613 00:20:18,519 --> 00:20:20,230 and I would love to take you out to dinner 614 00:20:20,254 --> 00:20:21,921 because today, 615 00:20:22,056 --> 00:20:23,389 I had... 616 00:20:23,524 --> 00:20:25,791 "the time of my life." 617 00:20:25,793 --> 00:20:29,261 - [chuckles] That's a good... [exhales] 618 00:20:29,397 --> 00:20:32,064 Here. I'll just give you that. 619 00:20:32,199 --> 00:20:33,865 - Uh, what's this? 620 00:20:34,001 --> 00:20:37,136 - It's the information for your sexual bias training boot camp. 621 00:20:37,871 --> 00:20:39,538 - What? - Since I got here today, 622 00:20:39,673 --> 00:20:40,872 you've objectified me. 623 00:20:40,874 --> 00:20:42,474 You haven't really learned anything. 624 00:20:42,476 --> 00:20:44,454 You've been trying to pick me up pretty much all day 625 00:20:44,478 --> 00:20:46,412 with your non-flirting flirting. 626 00:20:46,414 --> 00:20:48,280 The cooking, the dancing, 627 00:20:48,282 --> 00:20:50,082 and now you're gonna... 628 00:20:50,084 --> 00:20:52,351 ask out your sexual bias instructor? 629 00:20:52,486 --> 00:20:54,086 I mean, it's a little crazy. 630 00:20:54,221 --> 00:20:56,622 - I feel like I did an excellent job 631 00:20:56,758 --> 00:20:58,157 of not hitting on you. 632 00:20:58,292 --> 00:20:59,825 - And for the next four weekends, 633 00:20:59,827 --> 00:21:01,427 you'll learn why that's wrong. 634 00:21:01,562 --> 00:21:04,230 So I'll see you at the boot camp. 635 00:21:04,365 --> 00:21:05,631 Yeah? 636 00:21:05,767 --> 00:21:08,500 [engine turns over] 637 00:21:08,502 --> 00:21:10,436 - Wait. Courtney... - Bye. 638 00:21:10,571 --> 00:21:14,906 ♪ ♪ 639 00:21:14,908 --> 00:21:17,042 - Uncle, Eddie, I did it. I did it. 640 00:21:17,044 --> 00:21:19,645 I passed the engineer test. - Cool. 641 00:21:19,781 --> 00:21:21,313 - This means I can drive the engine now, 642 00:21:21,315 --> 00:21:22,714 why are you not more excited? 643 00:21:22,850 --> 00:21:24,450 - No, I am excited, Lucy. 644 00:21:24,452 --> 00:21:25,985 Congrats. - Hey, guys! I passed. 645 00:21:26,120 --> 00:21:27,765 - [flatly] Yeah, never doubted you for a second. 646 00:21:27,789 --> 00:21:29,054 - [flatly] That's great. Cap, where's Courtney? 647 00:21:29,056 --> 00:21:30,056 What happened? 648 00:21:30,124 --> 00:21:31,991 - She just left, but before she did, 649 00:21:32,126 --> 00:21:34,726 she read me the Riot Act for my behavior today. 650 00:21:34,728 --> 00:21:35,995 And then she ordered me 651 00:21:36,130 --> 00:21:38,664 to attend her sexual harassment boot camp. 652 00:21:38,666 --> 00:21:40,532 - [laughs] 653 00:21:40,668 --> 00:21:42,268 - Okay. - Thank you. 654 00:21:42,403 --> 00:21:43,603 - Why are you smiling? 655 00:21:43,737 --> 00:21:45,115 Now you have to go to boot camp. 656 00:21:45,139 --> 00:21:47,739 - Because this means I got another shot. 657 00:21:47,741 --> 00:21:49,941 [funky music] - ♪ Eddie! ♪ 658 00:21:49,943 --> 00:21:53,012 - Yes, you do, Cap. Yes, you do. 659 00:21:53,147 --> 00:21:54,925 - But seriously, can we please celebrate the fact 660 00:21:54,949 --> 00:21:56,482 that I passed the driver's test? 661 00:21:56,618 --> 00:21:57,883 - Yes! That's amazing! - Yes! 662 00:21:57,885 --> 00:21:59,151 - Come on. - Oh, whoa, whoa. 663 00:21:59,153 --> 00:22:00,730 Hey, what are you doing? - What? 664 00:22:00,754 --> 00:22:01,865 - Remember the seminar and stuff? 665 00:22:01,889 --> 00:22:02,954 Just one of these. - Oh. 666 00:22:02,956 --> 00:22:04,267 - Thank you. - No, no. 667 00:22:04,291 --> 00:22:05,625 - Coworker. 668 00:22:05,759 --> 00:22:06,870 - That was a good job that you did. 669 00:22:06,894 --> 00:22:08,360 - Thanks, guys. 670 00:22:08,362 --> 00:22:10,930 Got any of that cioppino left? Get outta here. 671 00:22:13,034 --> 00:22:15,567 - [chuckling] 672 00:22:15,569 --> 00:22:18,770 - Wait a minute, you're giving me a bad Yelp review? 673 00:22:18,772 --> 00:22:21,373 - "The salesman, Andy Myawani, 674 00:22:21,509 --> 00:22:23,108 "pulled the old bait and switch. 675 00:22:23,244 --> 00:22:24,844 "Beware these tactics, 676 00:22:24,979 --> 00:22:28,980 "and definitely beware the phrase, 677 00:22:28,982 --> 00:22:31,317 'I'll hook you up.'" 678 00:22:31,452 --> 00:22:33,919 - I thought we were gonna handle this like gentlemen. 679 00:22:34,055 --> 00:22:36,188 - That was before I submitted the bill to City Hall. 680 00:22:36,190 --> 00:22:39,325 Linda Price isn't gonna pay for it and neither am I. 681 00:22:39,460 --> 00:22:41,060 I'm disappointed in you, Andy. 682 00:22:41,195 --> 00:22:43,507 - I'll tell you what, Chief. We're basically at cost now. 683 00:22:43,531 --> 00:22:47,333 So the best I can do is knock off my commission. 684 00:22:47,335 --> 00:22:48,668 - Now we're talking. 685 00:22:48,802 --> 00:22:51,136 - You're cool with me forfeiting my commission? 686 00:22:51,138 --> 00:22:54,674 - I wasn't born yesterday. You're not forfeiting anything. 687 00:22:55,609 --> 00:22:57,076 - Damn, you're good. 688 00:22:57,211 --> 00:22:59,478 Real good. 689 00:22:59,613 --> 00:23:02,147 Let me see this. Jeez. 690 00:23:02,149 --> 00:23:03,593 You're the toughest customer I've ever had. 691 00:23:03,617 --> 00:23:04,884 I'll tell you that right now. 692 00:23:05,019 --> 00:23:06,330 - I think I told you that before we started. 693 00:23:06,354 --> 00:23:08,287 - All right, Chief, there you go. 694 00:23:08,422 --> 00:23:09,889 There's your new price. 695 00:23:10,024 --> 00:23:11,357 You should love that number, then. 696 00:23:11,359 --> 00:23:12,491 - Yes. 697 00:23:12,626 --> 00:23:14,826 Andy... 698 00:23:14,962 --> 00:23:16,362 pleasure doing business with you. 699 00:23:16,364 --> 00:23:18,230 [both laugh] 700 00:23:18,232 --> 00:23:20,900 - Are you sure you don't want that stain guard coating? 701 00:23:21,035 --> 00:23:22,768 You know, with a carpet this light, 702 00:23:22,904 --> 00:23:24,014 it might be a smart idea, Chief. 703 00:23:24,038 --> 00:23:25,415 - Stop, stop, stop. Okay? 704 00:23:25,439 --> 00:23:27,839 Go sell some other chump the stain guard coating. 705 00:23:27,841 --> 00:23:29,174 All right? Dismissed. 706 00:23:29,310 --> 00:23:30,510 - Got it. 707 00:23:30,644 --> 00:23:33,379 Hey, thanks, Johnny. 708 00:23:33,514 --> 00:23:34,714 Ooh, so good, Johnny. 709 00:23:34,848 --> 00:23:36,026 Are you sure you don't want a coffee? 710 00:23:36,050 --> 00:23:38,117 - How much per yard for that? 711 00:23:38,252 --> 00:23:40,119 [laughter] 712 00:23:40,254 --> 00:23:42,099 - Well, me and the guys have to head out. 713 00:23:42,123 --> 00:23:44,056 Vicky found out we were redoing your office 714 00:23:44,058 --> 00:23:47,593 and she hired me to recarpet your whole house. 715 00:23:47,595 --> 00:23:50,196 - She what? - Yep. 716 00:23:50,331 --> 00:23:52,998 - [growls] 717 00:23:53,134 --> 00:23:54,667 Damn it! 718 00:23:57,271 --> 00:23:59,705 Fuuuuu! 719 00:23:59,729 --> 00:24:01,729 >>>>oakislandtk<<<<< www.opensubtitles.org 52431

Can't find what you're looking for?
Get subtitles in any language from opensubtitles.com, and translate them here.