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1
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[Introductory musical note]
2
00:00:02,567 --> 00:00:03,937
You would not
believe the extra work
3
00:00:03,960 --> 00:00:06,010
that comes with
being a sports agent.
4
00:00:06,093 --> 00:00:08,493
If a client wants property,
I'm scouting houses.
5
00:00:08,573 --> 00:00:11,273
Somebody on a diet,
I'm finding a nutritionist.
6
00:00:11,359 --> 00:00:13,619
Now one of our athletes
is having a bachelor party.
7
00:00:13,709 --> 00:00:14,929
Who do you think...
8
00:00:15,015 --> 00:00:16,355
You are not popping
out of a cake.
9
00:00:16,451 --> 00:00:18,761
[Laughter]
10
00:00:18,844 --> 00:00:20,724
No, but I have to
find someone who will.
11
00:00:20,803 --> 00:00:22,633
Just in case, be
available next Saturday.
12
00:00:22,718 --> 00:00:23,808
[Laughter]
13
00:00:23,893 --> 00:00:25,723
[Knock on door]
14
00:00:25,808 --> 00:00:27,678
Ooh! Pedicure party!
15
00:00:27,766 --> 00:00:29,456
Can I soak?
16
00:00:29,551 --> 00:00:31,161
Since when are
you into grooming?
17
00:00:31,248 --> 00:00:32,568
Since I need help
trying to hook up
18
00:00:32,597 --> 00:00:34,337
with this classy
girl I met at yoga.
19
00:00:34,425 --> 00:00:37,205
Yeah, been getting
my shocker on.
20
00:00:37,298 --> 00:00:38,818
Oh, a new girl?
21
00:00:38,908 --> 00:00:40,018
Well, I don't know
how I can help, but...
22
00:00:40,040 --> 00:00:41,300
Spencer: You can't.
23
00:00:41,389 --> 00:00:42,959
I'm here to see Dee
Dee, the classy one.
24
00:00:44,174 --> 00:00:45,574
No offense, Mona.
25
00:00:45,654 --> 00:00:47,074
None taken, but
next time you're broke,
26
00:00:47,090 --> 00:00:48,570
see if the classy
one loans you money.
27
00:00:48,657 --> 00:00:50,217
[Laughter]
28
00:00:50,311 --> 00:00:51,701
Her name's Gabrielle.
29
00:00:51,790 --> 00:00:54,620
She's smart, pretty, and
way out of my league.
30
00:00:54,706 --> 00:00:57,096
Well, Spencer, the first
way to impress a classy girl
31
00:00:57,187 --> 00:00:59,227
is to take her to
a classy place.
32
00:00:59,320 --> 00:01:01,060
Good idea.
33
00:01:01,148 --> 00:01:02,388
You think she'll
like the crab shack?
34
00:01:02,410 --> 00:01:05,110
Ladies love a good shellfish.
35
00:01:05,195 --> 00:01:07,065
Stay with me, Spence.
36
00:01:07,154 --> 00:01:09,164
My agency has a luxury skybox.
37
00:01:09,243 --> 00:01:11,133
The whole family's going
to a warriors game tonight.
38
00:01:11,158 --> 00:01:12,328
You should bring Gabrielle.
39
00:01:12,420 --> 00:01:13,440
Yeah, even my mom's bringing her
40
00:01:13,464 --> 00:01:16,164
smokin' hot new boy toy Glenn.
41
00:01:16,250 --> 00:01:18,120
She insists I call him that.
42
00:01:19,383 --> 00:01:21,303
I talked her down from
Mr. Hottie cchotterson.
43
00:01:22,517 --> 00:01:23,517
Who?
44
00:01:23,561 --> 00:01:25,131
[Laughter]
45
00:01:25,215 --> 00:01:26,825
[Introductory theme song]
46
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♪ through this
journey of discovery ♪
47
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♪ you finding you
I'm finding me ♪
48
00:01:36,487 --> 00:01:39,837
♪ now that I have
someone special ♪
49
00:01:39,925 --> 00:01:41,485
♪ who brings out the joy ♪
50
00:01:41,579 --> 00:01:43,669
♪ brings out the
joy inside of me ♪
51
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♪ inside of me ♪
52
00:01:46,193 --> 00:01:48,153
♪ we can become
whatever we want ♪
53
00:01:48,238 --> 00:01:50,408
♪ all we need is lovin' ♪
54
00:01:50,501 --> 00:01:53,981
♪ that's the way I
feel it should be ♪
55
00:01:54,070 --> 00:01:56,120
♪ you and me ♪
56
00:01:56,203 --> 00:01:58,553
[Off-key] ♪ me ♪
57
00:01:58,640 --> 00:02:00,250
Ooh. [Ironic laughter]
58
00:02:02,383 --> 00:02:04,693
[Introductory musical note]
59
00:02:04,776 --> 00:02:06,466
Thanks again for
inviting us, Dee Dee.
60
00:02:06,561 --> 00:02:09,651
I usually sit courtside,
so this is a cute change.
61
00:02:11,392 --> 00:02:12,612
Stick with me, Gabrielle.
62
00:02:12,697 --> 00:02:14,737
I'll take you to a
lot of fancy places.
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00:02:14,830 --> 00:02:17,400
Ooh! No skin on the shrimp?
64
00:02:17,485 --> 00:02:18,655
Nice!
65
00:02:18,747 --> 00:02:20,047
[Laughter]
66
00:02:20,140 --> 00:02:24,140
[Laughs] Spencer,
you are so funny!
67
00:02:24,231 --> 00:02:26,451
Stop acting like you've
never seen shrimp before!
68
00:02:28,713 --> 00:02:31,193
Ma, there are 20 chairs here.
69
00:02:31,281 --> 00:02:33,171
Get off of him. This is not
the back seat of a Chevy.
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00:02:33,196 --> 00:02:34,716
[Laughter]
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00:02:34,806 --> 00:02:37,106
I know. This lap is a Cadillac.
72
00:02:37,200 --> 00:02:38,590
[Laughter]
73
00:02:38,680 --> 00:02:41,200
Oh, fine. Come on, Glenn.
Let me make you a plate.
74
00:02:41,291 --> 00:02:43,471
We better hurry. Spencer
is killin' those shrimp.
75
00:02:43,554 --> 00:02:45,604
[Laughter]
76
00:02:45,687 --> 00:02:47,947
Hello, sports fans.
Sorry we're late.
77
00:02:48,037 --> 00:02:50,337
Your mom had a little trouble
choosing her game hair.
78
00:02:50,431 --> 00:02:52,131
[Laughter]
79
00:02:52,215 --> 00:02:53,775
- Mona: Hi, daddy.
- How are you?
80
00:02:53,869 --> 00:02:55,999
Little Dee, I am
really proud of you.
81
00:02:56,088 --> 00:02:57,868
Working hard, making
your own money.
82
00:02:57,960 --> 00:02:59,440
I get to reap the rewards!
83
00:02:59,527 --> 00:03:00,957
Well, it's good to know I work
84
00:03:01,050 --> 00:03:03,570
sixty hours a week
for your benefit, daddy.
85
00:03:03,661 --> 00:03:06,141
That's it? I worked
80 for yours.
86
00:03:06,229 --> 00:03:07,879
[Laughter]
87
00:03:07,970 --> 00:03:09,750
But I'm still proud.
88
00:03:09,841 --> 00:03:11,121
This luxury suite
adds sophistication
89
00:03:11,147 --> 00:03:14,057
to even a sweaty
sport like basketball.
90
00:03:14,150 --> 00:03:15,890
And speaking of
over-active sweat glands,
91
00:03:15,978 --> 00:03:17,198
who let Phyllis in?
92
00:03:17,284 --> 00:03:18,984
[Laughter]
93
00:03:19,068 --> 00:03:20,938
Your ex-husband's
hair isn't that greasy.
94
00:03:21,026 --> 00:03:22,736
I mean, he shouldn't stand
near an open flame, but...
95
00:03:22,767 --> 00:03:24,287
[Laughter]
96
00:03:24,378 --> 00:03:25,638
Charles, big Dee Dee,
97
00:03:25,727 --> 00:03:27,467
I'd like you to meet
Glenn stalworth.
98
00:03:27,555 --> 00:03:29,555
Nice to meet you.
99
00:03:29,644 --> 00:03:31,434
Phyllis, I didn't know
you were adopting.
100
00:03:31,515 --> 00:03:33,995
[Laughter]
101
00:03:34,083 --> 00:03:35,433
She's not.
102
00:03:35,519 --> 00:03:37,089
Nice hair, by the way.
103
00:03:37,173 --> 00:03:38,443
[Laughter]
104
00:03:38,522 --> 00:03:40,392
For your information,
he's my man.
105
00:03:40,481 --> 00:03:43,571
He's also a fireman. You
should see him in action.
106
00:03:43,658 --> 00:03:45,618
Glenn, go get your ladder
and climb big Dee Dee.
107
00:03:47,139 --> 00:03:48,679
I hear you're the one
that saved my property.
108
00:03:48,706 --> 00:03:50,186
I can't thank you enough.
109
00:03:50,273 --> 00:03:52,323
I have two very precious
jewels in that building.
110
00:03:52,406 --> 00:03:54,356
And one leftover lump of coal.
111
00:03:54,451 --> 00:03:55,541
[Laughter]
112
00:03:55,626 --> 00:03:56,666
[Yells] Yes!
113
00:03:56,758 --> 00:03:58,328
Tell me you saw that last play!
114
00:03:58,412 --> 00:04:00,892
Cross over, then take
it to the right, bam!
115
00:04:00,979 --> 00:04:02,369
Spencer, please!
116
00:04:02,459 --> 00:04:03,939
Let's use our skybox
voices. Come on.
117
00:04:04,026 --> 00:04:06,766
- [Laughter]
- Oh. My bad.
118
00:04:06,855 --> 00:04:08,985
I'll keep it down.
119
00:04:09,074 --> 00:04:10,904
This is pretty weird.
120
00:04:10,989 --> 00:04:13,249
[Dee Dee: There's
our dad, our moms,
121
00:04:13,340 --> 00:04:15,430
and your possible future daddy.
122
00:04:17,474 --> 00:04:19,744
We're like "the Brady
bunch" with afro sheen.
123
00:04:19,824 --> 00:04:21,574
[Laughter]
124
00:04:21,652 --> 00:04:23,012
Mona, I thought
you were supporting
125
00:04:23,045 --> 00:04:24,785
your mom's
relationship with Glenn.
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00:04:24,873 --> 00:04:27,443
I am, but if she keeps
acting like a teenager in heat,
127
00:04:27,528 --> 00:04:29,048
I won't make it to halftime.
128
00:04:29,138 --> 00:04:30,268
[Laughter]
129
00:04:30,357 --> 00:04:31,967
Anyway...
130
00:04:32,054 --> 00:04:34,324
Glenn's been planning a
little weekend get-away.
131
00:04:34,404 --> 00:04:35,624
A little lover's retreat.
132
00:04:35,710 --> 00:04:37,100
You're going away? That's great!
133
00:04:37,189 --> 00:04:38,799
If you leave now,
you can be there by...
134
00:04:38,887 --> 00:04:40,887
Well, who cares as long as
you go now? Go, come on.
135
00:04:42,064 --> 00:04:44,334
I have a cabin in
Aspen. No phone, no TV.
136
00:04:44,414 --> 00:04:46,814
We can spend every
uninterrupted moment together.
137
00:04:47,983 --> 00:04:50,253
Dear, don't you get enough
stress from your day job?
138
00:04:50,333 --> 00:04:51,513
[Laughter]
139
00:04:51,595 --> 00:04:53,545
[Introductory musical note]
140
00:04:54,642 --> 00:04:56,472
So sorry I'm late.
141
00:04:56,557 --> 00:04:58,037
I had to hold a
linebacker's hand
142
00:04:58,123 --> 00:04:59,783
while he got his first tattoo.
143
00:04:59,864 --> 00:05:01,344
[Laughter]
144
00:05:01,431 --> 00:05:03,521
Well, we already
ordered for you.
145
00:05:03,607 --> 00:05:06,037
And I'm so glad you
guys could join us.
146
00:05:06,131 --> 00:05:07,661
I just think it's so important
147
00:05:07,742 --> 00:05:10,272
to get to know your
boyfriend's friends.
148
00:05:10,353 --> 00:05:12,223
Especially when
they're girls, right?
149
00:05:12,312 --> 00:05:14,182
- [Fake laughs]
- [Laughter]
150
00:05:14,270 --> 00:05:17,620
So, you two hooked
up? Congratulations.
151
00:05:17,708 --> 00:05:19,358
[Sighs]Thanks to
you and the skybox,
152
00:05:19,449 --> 00:05:21,539
this is our one-weekiversary!
153
00:05:21,625 --> 00:05:23,795
[Both giggling]
154
00:05:23,888 --> 00:05:25,498
We've been to the
ballet, the opera,
155
00:05:25,586 --> 00:05:26,986
and I finally learned
the proper way
156
00:05:27,022 --> 00:05:28,092
to check for food in my teeth!
157
00:05:28,110 --> 00:05:29,420
Oh, oh, sweetie, sweetie,
158
00:05:29,503 --> 00:05:31,293
that's not something
we brag about, ok?
159
00:05:31,374 --> 00:05:32,464
[Laughter]
160
00:05:32,549 --> 00:05:34,119
- My bad.
- Yes!
161
00:05:35,291 --> 00:05:37,381
So, Dee Dee, how's the
bachelor party coming along?
162
00:05:37,467 --> 00:05:39,377
Great! Cigars, pretty ladies,
163
00:05:39,469 --> 00:05:41,079
six kinds of scotch.
164
00:05:41,166 --> 00:05:43,686
[Fake choke] Bachelor
parties are so immature.
165
00:05:43,778 --> 00:05:45,818
Spencer, I am so
glad you're not going,
166
00:05:45,910 --> 00:05:47,910
because I'd have
to put my foot down.
167
00:05:47,999 --> 00:05:49,649
[Laughs] Yeah, right.
168
00:05:49,740 --> 00:05:51,830
Like your size six and a
half can stop me from going.
169
00:05:51,916 --> 00:05:52,916
[Laughter]
170
00:05:53,004 --> 00:05:54,274
But who cares?
171
00:05:55,790 --> 00:05:57,910
Because I wasn't invited to
that immature foolishness.
172
00:05:57,966 --> 00:05:59,006
Gabrielle: Yes!
173
00:06:00,795 --> 00:06:03,055
Oh, I can't eat
these. They're cold.
174
00:06:03,145 --> 00:06:04,925
They just came from my kitchen.
175
00:06:05,016 --> 00:06:06,666
Then your kitchen
must be freezing.
176
00:06:06,757 --> 00:06:07,757
Sorry, hon.
177
00:06:09,804 --> 00:06:12,024
I see you've added
another winner to your crew.
178
00:06:12,110 --> 00:06:14,330
[Laughter]
179
00:06:14,417 --> 00:06:15,937
Could I get some more soy sauce?
180
00:06:16,027 --> 00:06:17,507
You don't need more sodium.
181
00:06:18,900 --> 00:06:20,420
I'll have these
noodles heated up.
182
00:06:20,510 --> 00:06:22,120
Thank you.
183
00:06:22,207 --> 00:06:24,167
Oh, Spencer, Spencer, sweetie.
184
00:06:24,253 --> 00:06:27,263
I know you're not gonna start
eating before me, are you?
185
00:06:27,343 --> 00:06:29,003
- My bad.
- Yes.
186
00:06:29,084 --> 00:06:30,744
Oh, excuse me, sweetie?
187
00:06:30,825 --> 00:06:33,735
Can you be a dear and
bring us both new, hot bowls?
188
00:06:33,828 --> 00:06:34,828
Hot.
189
00:06:37,701 --> 00:06:39,881
Spencer, I thought you
said you were starving.
190
00:06:39,964 --> 00:06:41,054
Nah, I'm cool.
191
00:06:41,139 --> 00:06:42,879
My girl's just
looking out for me.
192
00:06:42,967 --> 00:06:45,577
Oh, and I expect dessert
to be complimentary.
193
00:06:45,666 --> 00:06:47,146
Oh, you get
something free, all right.
194
00:06:47,189 --> 00:06:48,839
[Laughter]
195
00:06:48,930 --> 00:06:51,110
[Introductory musical note]
196
00:06:51,193 --> 00:06:54,283
Your plan for the bachelor
party looks fabulous!
197
00:06:54,370 --> 00:06:55,700
I see your client
spared no expense
198
00:06:55,719 --> 00:06:57,809
for female entertainment.
199
00:06:57,895 --> 00:07:00,455
You know, your mother's
no stranger to burlesque.
200
00:07:01,856 --> 00:07:03,546
Why am I not surprised?
201
00:07:03,640 --> 00:07:05,030
[Laughter]
202
00:07:05,120 --> 00:07:06,900
The time, sometime
after midnight.
203
00:07:06,991 --> 00:07:08,601
The place, somewhere in Vegas.
204
00:07:08,689 --> 00:07:10,599
I don't know where.
I was stuck in a cake.
205
00:07:10,691 --> 00:07:12,301
[Laughter]
206
00:07:12,388 --> 00:07:14,298
But when I popped out of it,
207
00:07:14,390 --> 00:07:15,830
I was looking
into the baby blues
208
00:07:15,913 --> 00:07:17,873
of one frank Sinatra.
209
00:07:17,959 --> 00:07:19,789
Oh, he downed his Martini
210
00:07:19,874 --> 00:07:23,364
and placed his olive
somewhere I'd rather not mention.
211
00:07:23,443 --> 00:07:25,183
But I still have the pit.
212
00:07:25,270 --> 00:07:26,620
- [Laughter]
- [Knock on door]
213
00:07:27,751 --> 00:07:29,011
Come in, whoever it is!
214
00:07:29,100 --> 00:07:30,930
Break it down if you have to!
215
00:07:31,015 --> 00:07:32,315
[Laughter]
216
00:07:32,408 --> 00:07:34,108
Yo, double dees.
217
00:07:34,192 --> 00:07:36,502
That's what frank called me.
218
00:07:36,586 --> 00:07:37,846
I was heavily padded.
219
00:07:37,935 --> 00:07:39,365
[Laughter]
220
00:07:40,590 --> 00:07:42,070
Hey, Dee.
221
00:07:42,157 --> 00:07:43,477
You know how you helped
me get with Gabrielle?
222
00:07:43,506 --> 00:07:45,376
I'm not taking credit for that.
223
00:07:45,465 --> 00:07:48,075
In fact, I saw little traces
of crazy in the skybox,
224
00:07:48,163 --> 00:07:49,513
which were confirmed
225
00:07:49,599 --> 00:07:51,139
by touches of whack-a-doo
in the noodle bar!
226
00:07:51,166 --> 00:07:52,856
[Laughter]
227
00:07:52,950 --> 00:07:54,950
I know. It's gotten to the point
228
00:07:55,039 --> 00:07:57,219
where I wake up
screaming "my bad, my bad"!
229
00:07:58,695 --> 00:08:01,015
- So what can I do to help?
- I need you to get her off me.
230
00:08:01,045 --> 00:08:02,475
See, my way of breaking up
231
00:08:02,569 --> 00:08:04,789
conflicts with the
new, mature Spencer.
232
00:08:04,875 --> 00:08:06,875
Spencer, you can
break up with her nicely
233
00:08:06,964 --> 00:08:08,714
and still maintain
your integrity.
234
00:08:08,792 --> 00:08:10,192
Just be firm, direct.
235
00:08:10,272 --> 00:08:12,452
There are no
maybes or probablys.
236
00:08:12,535 --> 00:08:14,725
Just get in the woman's face,
look her straight in the eye,
237
00:08:14,755 --> 00:08:16,225
and cut her loose.
238
00:08:16,321 --> 00:08:17,631
Ooh...
239
00:08:17,714 --> 00:08:19,194
That's much better
than my old way.
240
00:08:19,281 --> 00:08:20,761
They always cry when I say
241
00:08:20,848 --> 00:08:22,648
I'm being called to
Africa by the peace corps.
242
00:08:22,719 --> 00:08:23,979
[Laughter]
243
00:08:24,068 --> 00:08:27,068
[Introductory musical note]
244
00:08:28,203 --> 00:08:29,863
I can't believe Spencer's late.
245
00:08:29,944 --> 00:08:31,904
I need male input
on what tasteless gifts
246
00:08:31,989 --> 00:08:33,379
to get for this bachelor party.
247
00:08:33,469 --> 00:08:34,779
[Laughter]
248
00:08:34,862 --> 00:08:36,952
Whips, handcuffs.
249
00:08:37,038 --> 00:08:39,478
Studded leather spiky thingy...
250
00:08:40,694 --> 00:08:43,614
How desperate would you
have to be to buy this stuff?
251
00:08:43,697 --> 00:08:45,257
Phyllis: Wow, that's huge!
252
00:08:45,350 --> 00:08:46,920
How many batteries does it take?
253
00:08:47,004 --> 00:08:49,054
Four c's will get you
where you want to go.
254
00:08:49,137 --> 00:08:50,917
[Laughter]
255
00:08:52,314 --> 00:08:54,934
It also comes with an
adapter for your car.
256
00:08:55,012 --> 00:08:56,932
For those long road trips.
257
00:08:57,014 --> 00:08:59,104
[Laughter]
258
00:08:59,190 --> 00:09:01,800
Ma, what are you doing here?
259
00:09:01,889 --> 00:09:03,329
What are you doing here?
260
00:09:03,412 --> 00:09:05,592
Ma'am, if you buy
a fifth vibrating item,
261
00:09:05,675 --> 00:09:08,325
you get a free DVD
of "a night in Paris".
262
00:09:08,417 --> 00:09:10,327
[Laughter]
263
00:09:10,419 --> 00:09:12,509
Mom, a word now
in the bondage aisle.
264
00:09:12,595 --> 00:09:13,855
[Laughter]
265
00:09:16,425 --> 00:09:18,115
- Where have you been?
- Upstairs.
266
00:09:18,209 --> 00:09:19,859
That's where all the DVDs are.
267
00:09:19,950 --> 00:09:21,100
Now, that i'm a bachelor again,
268
00:09:21,125 --> 00:09:22,335
I need to buy back everything
269
00:09:22,431 --> 00:09:23,911
that Gabrielle made
me throw away.
270
00:09:25,173 --> 00:09:27,223
So your break-up went well?
271
00:09:27,305 --> 00:09:29,785
Oh, yeah. I followed
your advice to the letter,
272
00:09:29,873 --> 00:09:32,273
and I haven't spoken to
that control freak in two days.
273
00:09:32,354 --> 00:09:33,534
This is humiliating!
274
00:09:33,616 --> 00:09:35,436
Well, how do you think I feel?
275
00:09:35,531 --> 00:09:38,061
I need help, Mona.
This is hard to admit,
276
00:09:38,142 --> 00:09:41,022
but Glenn and I haven't
been intimate yet.
277
00:09:41,102 --> 00:09:42,892
But you're always
all over each other.
278
00:09:42,973 --> 00:09:46,413
The other night, he practically
had your neck for dessert.
279
00:09:46,498 --> 00:09:47,868
That's because it's
the only piece of flesh
280
00:09:47,891 --> 00:09:50,111
I've allowed him to see.
281
00:09:50,198 --> 00:09:51,848
Mona, I'm nervous.
282
00:09:51,939 --> 00:09:53,719
I mean, our big
get-away is this weekend,
283
00:09:53,810 --> 00:09:57,250
and he's so young
and sexy and virile.
284
00:09:57,335 --> 00:09:58,815
All the guys I've
been with up to now
285
00:09:58,902 --> 00:10:01,472
have barely been able
to keep up with me.
286
00:10:01,557 --> 00:10:04,257
I think Glenn can
go the distance...
287
00:10:04,342 --> 00:10:05,342
And then some.
288
00:10:05,387 --> 00:10:06,817
[Laughter]
289
00:10:06,910 --> 00:10:08,740
Look, ma, I will
help you through this.
290
00:10:08,825 --> 00:10:11,215
Now, put everything
back and let's go.
291
00:10:11,306 --> 00:10:12,606
Ok, well, maybe except
292
00:10:12,699 --> 00:10:14,399
for the chocolate-flavored
massage oil.
293
00:10:14,483 --> 00:10:15,623
[Laughter]
294
00:10:17,181 --> 00:10:19,051
$78 for a tickler?
295
00:10:19,140 --> 00:10:20,200
[Scoffs] Just give me the money.
296
00:10:20,228 --> 00:10:21,798
I'll tickle my damn self.
297
00:10:21,882 --> 00:10:22,972
[Laughter]
298
00:10:24,232 --> 00:10:25,972
Sweetie! [Giggle]
299
00:10:28,366 --> 00:10:31,276
I recognized your rusted-out
cutlass in the parking lot,
300
00:10:31,369 --> 00:10:34,019
so I decided to come
in here and surprise you!
301
00:10:34,111 --> 00:10:35,111
Surprise!
302
00:10:37,027 --> 00:10:39,417
It certainly is.
Look, I thought we...
303
00:10:39,508 --> 00:10:41,568
Oh, silly, I knew you didn't
want to break up with me!
304
00:10:41,597 --> 00:10:43,337
And you coming in here
305
00:10:43,425 --> 00:10:45,075
trying to find us a
little entertainment
306
00:10:45,166 --> 00:10:47,646
just proves it to me.
307
00:10:47,734 --> 00:10:49,694
- It does?
- And since I'm here,
308
00:10:49,779 --> 00:10:51,409
I'm gonna get us
something a little special too,
309
00:10:51,433 --> 00:10:53,783
because I can't wait
310
00:10:53,870 --> 00:10:56,350
to spend the night
making up to you.
311
00:10:56,438 --> 00:10:58,268
So you drink down
that gatorade, big boy.
312
00:10:58,353 --> 00:10:59,483
[Imitates yelp]
313
00:10:59,571 --> 00:11:00,881
[Laughter]
314
00:11:06,709 --> 00:11:07,879
Dee Dee, make her go away!
315
00:11:09,494 --> 00:11:10,804
Don't worry, Spencer.
316
00:11:10,887 --> 00:11:12,317
We are breaking
up with this girl
317
00:11:12,410 --> 00:11:14,800
if it's the last thing I do!
318
00:11:14,891 --> 00:11:17,071
Now, clearly, Gabrielle
is a "get-what-she-wants"
319
00:11:17,154 --> 00:11:19,814
type of girl. I know
how to handle her kind.
320
00:11:19,896 --> 00:11:21,416
I'm glad.
321
00:11:21,506 --> 00:11:23,346
Because her kind is
buying a lot of freaky stuff!
322
00:11:23,378 --> 00:11:24,858
[Introductory musical note]
323
00:11:26,642 --> 00:11:29,172
Wow. The first time
I'm giving a sex talk,
324
00:11:29,253 --> 00:11:30,863
and I'm giving it to my mother.
325
00:11:30,951 --> 00:11:32,171
[Laughter]
326
00:11:32,256 --> 00:11:34,476
Well, sex was
different in my day.
327
00:11:34,563 --> 00:11:36,093
Men were lucky just to get it.
328
00:11:37,435 --> 00:11:39,605
Now you've gotta
have tricks and whatnot.
329
00:11:39,699 --> 00:11:40,919
Mona, I don't have any tricks,
330
00:11:41,004 --> 00:11:42,794
and my whatnot's
seen better days.
331
00:11:44,355 --> 00:11:46,875
Don't worry, ma. It'll be ok.
332
00:11:46,967 --> 00:11:48,927
Now, remember, the
best intimacy comes
333
00:11:49,012 --> 00:11:50,542
when two people feel...
334
00:11:50,622 --> 00:11:52,122
Whatever. I just
want to rock his world.
335
00:11:52,146 --> 00:11:53,316
Give me some tips.
336
00:11:53,408 --> 00:11:55,578
[Laughter]
337
00:11:55,671 --> 00:11:58,371
Ok. Confidence is key.
338
00:11:58,456 --> 00:12:00,716
So I usually have
some wine, low lighting,
339
00:12:00,807 --> 00:12:02,547
and by low I mean off.
340
00:12:02,634 --> 00:12:05,164
And if you lay just right,
341
00:12:05,246 --> 00:12:06,546
it emphasizes the breasts
342
00:12:06,638 --> 00:12:08,678
and De-emphasized the back fat.
343
00:12:08,771 --> 00:12:09,771
[Laughter]
344
00:12:10,860 --> 00:12:13,040
Oh, god. It's the
blind leading the blind.
345
00:12:13,123 --> 00:12:15,303
- [Laughter]
- [Introductory musical note]
346
00:12:15,386 --> 00:12:17,166
Thanks for calling, Dee Dee.
347
00:12:17,258 --> 00:12:18,648
It's nice to hang
out with someone
348
00:12:18,738 --> 00:12:20,568
you have so much in common with.
349
00:12:20,652 --> 00:12:22,392
We both have great
style, fabulous hair,
350
00:12:22,480 --> 00:12:24,740
and we care so
much about Spencer.
351
00:12:24,831 --> 00:12:26,531
Actually...
352
00:12:26,615 --> 00:12:28,355
I'm here on his behalf.
353
00:12:28,443 --> 00:12:29,733
He's been trying
to be a gentleman
354
00:12:29,749 --> 00:12:30,859
and break up with you nicely,
355
00:12:30,880 --> 00:12:32,840
but you keep ignoring him.
356
00:12:32,926 --> 00:12:34,576
Of course I'm
ignoring him, honey.
357
00:12:34,666 --> 00:12:37,096
He's a man.
They're all confused.
358
00:12:37,191 --> 00:12:38,801
[Laughter]
359
00:12:38,888 --> 00:12:40,798
He's just afraid of
getting too close.
360
00:12:40,890 --> 00:12:43,810
But I'm helping him fix that.
361
00:12:43,893 --> 00:12:46,503
[Kindly] Come on now, Gabrielle.
362
00:12:46,591 --> 00:12:49,641
Let's hold up the
truth mirror, shall we?
363
00:12:49,725 --> 00:12:51,805
Now, I understand it may
be hard hearing it from him,
364
00:12:51,901 --> 00:12:54,731
but you and I, we speak
the same language.
365
00:12:54,817 --> 00:12:56,647
It's over.
366
00:12:56,732 --> 00:12:57,972
[Scoffs] Are you
sure he feels...
367
00:12:57,994 --> 00:12:59,394
It's over.
368
00:12:59,474 --> 00:13:01,264
- Yeah, but what about...
- [Emphasize] Over.
369
00:13:01,345 --> 00:13:03,215
[Laughter]
370
00:13:03,304 --> 00:13:04,874
Wow.
371
00:13:04,958 --> 00:13:07,128
No one's ever been that
honest with me before.
372
00:13:08,178 --> 00:13:09,478
Well, I guess I have no choice.
373
00:13:09,571 --> 00:13:11,051
I mean, if Spencer
wants to let me go,
374
00:13:11,138 --> 00:13:12,918
I'll let him go. [Fake laugh]
375
00:13:13,967 --> 00:13:17,057
Thank you for taking
the time to tell me this.
376
00:13:18,885 --> 00:13:20,755
I'm sorry if I was harsh,
377
00:13:20,843 --> 00:13:23,323
but it's for the
good of womankind!
378
00:13:25,065 --> 00:13:27,235
She left quickly.
379
00:13:27,328 --> 00:13:28,808
You know, you
could learn from her.
380
00:13:28,895 --> 00:13:31,245
[Laughter]
381
00:13:35,727 --> 00:13:38,167
[Introductory musical note]
382
00:13:38,252 --> 00:13:40,042
[Exotic music playing]
383
00:13:43,387 --> 00:13:45,867
[Zills chiming]
384
00:13:47,261 --> 00:13:49,521
Ok, so this next movement
385
00:13:49,611 --> 00:13:52,481
gets you in touch
with your sensual self.
386
00:13:52,570 --> 00:13:55,180
So think of your
body as an ocean...
387
00:13:55,269 --> 00:13:58,229
With waves of sexuality.
388
00:13:58,315 --> 00:13:59,355
[Exotic music continues]
389
00:14:01,449 --> 00:14:03,189
Oh, hell no!
390
00:14:03,277 --> 00:14:04,577
[Laughter]
391
00:14:07,890 --> 00:14:09,410
I'm trying to keep a young man.
392
00:14:09,500 --> 00:14:11,390
I don't need to slip a
disk trying to be Shakira!
393
00:14:11,415 --> 00:14:13,025
[Laughter]
394
00:14:13,113 --> 00:14:15,593
Phyllis, this is about
you being confident
395
00:14:15,680 --> 00:14:16,770
in your own skin.
396
00:14:16,856 --> 00:14:19,246
Shauna: Hmm! Wow!
397
00:14:19,336 --> 00:14:20,896
Where did you learn to do that?
398
00:14:20,990 --> 00:14:22,590
Shauna and I went
to law school together.
399
00:14:22,644 --> 00:14:24,394
I helped her with torts
400
00:14:24,472 --> 00:14:27,692
and she helped me belly dance
my waist down to 22 inches.
401
00:14:27,779 --> 00:14:30,169
Damn, my mom has a
cat with a 22-inch waist.
402
00:14:30,260 --> 00:14:31,700
[Laughter]
403
00:14:31,783 --> 00:14:34,313
Just remember, any body movement
404
00:14:34,395 --> 00:14:37,615
can be done in a
sexy, enticing way.
405
00:14:37,702 --> 00:14:39,622
I mean, just say you're...
406
00:14:39,704 --> 00:14:41,664
Taking out the trash.
407
00:14:42,925 --> 00:14:44,005
[Laughter]
408
00:14:46,450 --> 00:14:47,730
If I could do that,
I'd never have
409
00:14:47,756 --> 00:14:49,316
to take out the trash again!
410
00:14:50,541 --> 00:14:52,281
Ok, look, try this one.
411
00:14:54,023 --> 00:14:55,333
[Shauna groan]
412
00:14:55,416 --> 00:14:57,196
Uh! Yeah!
413
00:14:59,550 --> 00:15:02,340
Phyllis, work those abs!
414
00:15:02,423 --> 00:15:04,383
Ooh! Look at that.
I got me some abs!
415
00:15:06,383 --> 00:15:08,263
I'm starting to feel sexy.
416
00:15:09,299 --> 00:15:11,479
All I need is some lingerie
and some finger cymbals,
417
00:15:11,562 --> 00:15:13,242
and I'll get the groove
back in my whatnot!
418
00:15:13,260 --> 00:15:14,830
[Zills chiming]
419
00:15:14,914 --> 00:15:17,314
[Introductory musical note]
420
00:15:17,394 --> 00:15:18,744
Here's to me.
421
00:15:18,830 --> 00:15:21,010
I gave your mom
her sexuality back.
422
00:15:21,094 --> 00:15:24,664
I extricated Spencer from
that cling thing Gabrielle.
423
00:15:24,749 --> 00:15:27,359
She won't be hanging onto
another man anytime soon.
424
00:15:29,406 --> 00:15:30,406
[Laughter]
425
00:15:32,192 --> 00:15:34,802
Probably because she
hasn't let go of Spencer yet.
426
00:15:36,109 --> 00:15:37,939
She must be amazing in bed.
427
00:15:40,243 --> 00:15:41,773
I know what this looks like.
428
00:15:41,853 --> 00:15:43,593
But she's amazing in bed!
429
00:15:43,681 --> 00:15:45,161
[Laughter]
430
00:15:45,248 --> 00:15:46,818
Spencer, what happened?
431
00:15:46,902 --> 00:15:48,692
Gabrielle put a hood
on me or something.
432
00:15:49,992 --> 00:15:51,392
She made me do things that hurt
433
00:15:51,472 --> 00:15:53,562
and felt good at the same time.
434
00:15:55,563 --> 00:15:57,913
You gotta help me as soon
as we get back from cabo.
435
00:15:58,000 --> 00:15:59,830
What? It's rude
to sleep with a girl
436
00:15:59,915 --> 00:16:01,865
and not accept a
free Mexican vacation.
437
00:16:03,353 --> 00:16:05,403
Spencer, this isn't
about you anymore.
438
00:16:05,486 --> 00:16:07,746
This is about "good vs. Evil".
439
00:16:09,316 --> 00:16:11,966
Don't, don't. Hell hath no
fury like a Dee Dee scorned.
440
00:16:12,058 --> 00:16:13,758
[Laughter]
441
00:16:13,842 --> 00:16:15,242
Dee Dee: We had
an understanding.
442
00:16:15,322 --> 00:16:17,932
You were gonna
leave Spencer alone.
443
00:16:18,020 --> 00:16:20,540
I'm sure you've gone through
changes with your boyfriend.
444
00:16:20,631 --> 00:16:22,021
[Gasps] Oh, wait.
445
00:16:22,111 --> 00:16:24,161
You don't have one.
446
00:16:24,244 --> 00:16:25,744
Well, that's probably
because you're too busy
447
00:16:25,767 --> 00:16:27,457
all up in my business.
448
00:16:27,551 --> 00:16:28,771
[Laughter]
449
00:16:29,901 --> 00:16:31,291
You know, Gabrielle,
450
00:16:31,381 --> 00:16:33,561
by ignoring Spencer's
break-up attempts,
451
00:16:33,644 --> 00:16:36,654
you're playing into the whole
"crazy black woman" stereotype.
452
00:16:36,734 --> 00:16:39,134
Come on, girl. We barely
recovered from omarosa.
453
00:16:39,215 --> 00:16:40,605
[Laughter]
454
00:16:41,696 --> 00:16:44,696
Dee Dee, I eat girls
like you for breakfast,
455
00:16:44,786 --> 00:16:46,826
so why don't you
just go home alone
456
00:16:46,918 --> 00:16:48,138
like you do every night?
457
00:16:48,224 --> 00:16:50,234
I don't need a man to define me.
458
00:16:50,313 --> 00:16:52,923
Ah, the lonely woman's mantra.
459
00:16:53,012 --> 00:16:55,412
Gabrielle: Spencer! Let's go.
460
00:16:57,364 --> 00:16:59,844
All of a sudden, it's gotten
a little too crowded in here.
461
00:17:01,150 --> 00:17:02,240
[Yell] Come on!
462
00:17:02,325 --> 00:17:03,535
[Laughter]
463
00:17:06,329 --> 00:17:08,679
I brought you some ice cream
since you got your ass kicked.
464
00:17:08,766 --> 00:17:10,116
[Introductory musical note]
465
00:17:11,595 --> 00:17:15,555
Ok, ma, here's one
last thing for your trip.
466
00:17:15,643 --> 00:17:16,643
[Whispers] Condoms.
467
00:17:18,385 --> 00:17:20,425
But, remember, if you're
not ready, just say no.
468
00:17:20,517 --> 00:17:22,737
I mean, no one will judge
you for choosing abstinence.
469
00:17:23,999 --> 00:17:25,959
Dee Dee: Phyllis,
just relax and have fun.
470
00:17:26,045 --> 00:17:27,565
Make out on the nature trails.
471
00:17:27,655 --> 00:17:29,265
Frolic around
naked in the cabin.
472
00:17:29,352 --> 00:17:31,312
No, no, no. No
walking around naked.
473
00:17:31,398 --> 00:17:32,588
I don't want you
to get a splinter.
474
00:17:32,616 --> 00:17:33,786
[Laughter]
475
00:17:33,878 --> 00:17:35,048
[Knock on door]
476
00:17:37,882 --> 00:17:39,282
- Hi, honey.
- Hey.
477
00:17:41,277 --> 00:17:43,577
[Cheerful humming]
478
00:17:43,671 --> 00:17:46,201
[Groan] Wow.
479
00:17:46,282 --> 00:17:47,282
Up top.
480
00:17:49,198 --> 00:17:51,418
Ought to take you
out of town more often.
481
00:17:51,505 --> 00:17:53,155
Which reminds me,
do you have a number
482
00:17:53,246 --> 00:17:54,696
where you can be reached
and the address of the place
483
00:17:54,725 --> 00:17:55,895
you'll be staying?
484
00:17:55,987 --> 00:17:57,637
Yes, and at your
mother's request,
485
00:17:57,728 --> 00:17:59,028
I am not giving it to you.
486
00:17:59,121 --> 00:18:01,381
[Laughter]
487
00:18:01,471 --> 00:18:02,821
Oh, Mona, I don't think your mom
488
00:18:02,907 --> 00:18:04,557
can take that grooming
kit on the plane.
489
00:18:04,648 --> 00:18:05,888
She's right. We don't
want to get detained
490
00:18:05,910 --> 00:18:07,780
- and miss our flight.
- Oh, yeah.
491
00:18:07,869 --> 00:18:09,589
It'd be a shame if
something like that happened.
492
00:18:09,610 --> 00:18:12,960
Excuse me. I need
to go call Spencer.
493
00:18:14,049 --> 00:18:15,269
What are you gonna be cooking
494
00:18:15,355 --> 00:18:16,545
with all this
flavored oil, babe?
495
00:18:16,573 --> 00:18:17,623
[Laughter]
496
00:18:17,705 --> 00:18:19,185
[Surprise groan]
497
00:18:20,969 --> 00:18:22,319
Let's go now.
498
00:18:22,405 --> 00:18:24,015
[Introductory musical note]
499
00:18:32,415 --> 00:18:33,895
Wasn't it nice of Dee Dee
500
00:18:33,982 --> 00:18:35,392
to stop by this morning
and bring us muffins?
501
00:18:35,418 --> 00:18:37,638
Guess she knows
when she's been beaten.
502
00:18:37,725 --> 00:18:40,115
Uh, ma'am, I have to
look through your bag.
503
00:18:40,206 --> 00:18:41,206
Whatever.
504
00:18:44,035 --> 00:18:45,645
Uh, excuse me, ma'am.
505
00:18:45,733 --> 00:18:47,363
You're not allowed to take
sharp objects on board.
506
00:18:47,387 --> 00:18:49,817
That's not mine. I don't
even know how it got in there!
507
00:18:49,911 --> 00:18:51,651
Has anyone else had
access to your luggage?
508
00:18:51,739 --> 00:18:54,049
No! I packed it
myself last night!
509
00:18:54,133 --> 00:18:57,183
[Groans] Spencer, sweetie...
510
00:18:57,266 --> 00:18:58,676
Why don't you go to the
gate and save us some seats
511
00:18:58,702 --> 00:19:02,922
while I slowly explain
things to this guy?
512
00:19:03,011 --> 00:19:05,011
[Laugh] Ok. Nice knowing you.
513
00:19:05,100 --> 00:19:07,190
I mean, see you there.
514
00:19:07,276 --> 00:19:08,626
[Small laugh]
515
00:19:08,712 --> 00:19:10,852
Oh, just take the
stupid kit so I can go!
516
00:19:12,238 --> 00:19:14,038
Why are you traveling
with all this contraband?
517
00:19:14,065 --> 00:19:16,585
[Laughter]
518
00:19:16,677 --> 00:19:18,897
Dee Dee, that heifer, set me up.
519
00:19:18,983 --> 00:19:20,423
[Agrees ironically]
520
00:19:20,507 --> 00:19:22,637
Well, here at airport security,
521
00:19:22,726 --> 00:19:25,336
we don't take mystery
items in luggage lightly.
522
00:19:25,425 --> 00:19:26,595
Come with me.
523
00:19:26,687 --> 00:19:28,857
Oh, no, but I'll miss my flight!
524
00:19:28,950 --> 00:19:30,340
Yes, you will.
525
00:19:30,430 --> 00:19:32,070
- [Laughter]
- [Introductory musical note]
526
00:19:33,389 --> 00:19:34,959
- You look great.
- Thank you!
527
00:19:35,043 --> 00:19:36,133
[Knocks]
528
00:19:36,218 --> 00:19:38,868
Hello... Phyllis,
you're smiling.
529
00:19:38,960 --> 00:19:40,530
Good idea to stay
heavily medicated.
530
00:19:40,614 --> 00:19:41,944
That way, when your
boyfriend dumps you,
531
00:19:41,963 --> 00:19:43,183
it won't hurt so much.
532
00:19:43,269 --> 00:19:44,969
[Laughter]
533
00:19:45,053 --> 00:19:48,143
Glenn and I just got back
from our very romantic weekend.
534
00:19:48,230 --> 00:19:49,950
And this time, I didn't
have to carry my man
535
00:19:49,971 --> 00:19:51,491
over the threshold.
536
00:19:51,581 --> 00:19:52,671
[Laughter]
537
00:19:52,756 --> 00:19:54,016
You know, Phyllis,
538
00:19:54,105 --> 00:19:55,845
that's the only thing
I miss about you.
539
00:19:55,933 --> 00:19:57,813
The way you used
to put your back into it.
540
00:19:58,806 --> 00:20:00,286
Enough, Charles.
541
00:20:00,373 --> 00:20:02,003
Are those the pictures
of the morbid affair?
542
00:20:02,026 --> 00:20:04,456
Yes, and I was just
showing them to Mona.
543
00:20:04,551 --> 00:20:07,291
But, ma, these are all
taken from inside the room.
544
00:20:07,380 --> 00:20:09,430
That's because we
never made it outside...
545
00:20:09,512 --> 00:20:10,642
[Laughter]
546
00:20:10,731 --> 00:20:11,911
If you know what I mean.
547
00:20:14,343 --> 00:20:16,743
I'm gonna pretend like I
don't know what she means.
548
00:20:16,824 --> 00:20:18,004
What who means?
549
00:20:18,086 --> 00:20:19,256
[Laughter]
550
00:20:19,348 --> 00:20:20,608
As far as I'm concerned,
551
00:20:20,697 --> 00:20:22,257
the last two minutes
never happened.
552
00:20:22,351 --> 00:20:24,611
- [Laughter]
- [Introductory musical note]
553
00:20:25,920 --> 00:20:27,970
[Introductory theme song]
554
00:20:28,020 --> 00:20:32,570
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