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1
00:00:03,568 --> 00:00:07,268
Well, if it isn't tall,
dark and withered.
2
00:00:07,355 --> 00:00:09,225
Thanks. Looks like
you're fresh from the track.
3
00:00:09,313 --> 00:00:12,453
I trust you held your own
with the rest of the mares?
4
00:00:12,534 --> 00:00:14,934
I'll have you know I just
joined the spinning class.
5
00:00:15,015 --> 00:00:15,835
Today was my first workout.
6
00:00:15,928 --> 00:00:17,368
Heh. It is the only way
7
00:00:17,452 --> 00:00:19,982
you'll ever hear
heavy breathing again.
8
00:00:20,063 --> 00:00:21,743
If memory serves,
you don't hear it either.
9
00:00:21,804 --> 00:00:23,044
I believe the pattern
with Charles is
10
00:00:23,066 --> 00:00:24,416
grunt, whimper, snore?
11
00:00:25,373 --> 00:00:26,813
When he's with a real woman,
12
00:00:26,896 --> 00:00:29,586
he doesn't try to
get done so quickly.
13
00:00:29,681 --> 00:00:31,551
Please. Once you
pull off those eyelashes
14
00:00:31,640 --> 00:00:32,730
and hang up your hair,
15
00:00:32,815 --> 00:00:34,375
there's very little
real woman left.
16
00:00:37,689 --> 00:00:43,219
♪ Through this
journey of discovery ♪
17
00:00:43,304 --> 00:00:47,444
♪ you're finding
you, I'm finding me ♪
18
00:00:47,525 --> 00:00:50,745
♪ now that I have
someone special ♪
19
00:00:50,833 --> 00:00:52,843
♪ who brings out the joy ♪
20
00:00:52,922 --> 00:00:53,842
♪ brings out the joy ♪
21
00:00:53,923 --> 00:00:57,363
♪ inside of me ♪
22
00:00:57,448 --> 00:00:59,408
♪ we can become
whatever we want ♪
23
00:00:59,494 --> 00:01:01,894
♪ all we need is lovin', yeah ♪
24
00:01:01,974 --> 00:01:05,414
♪ that's the way I
feel it should be ♪
25
00:01:05,500 --> 00:01:07,110
♪ you and me ♪
26
00:01:07,197 --> 00:01:10,287
[Off-key] ♪ me ♪
27
00:01:10,374 --> 00:01:11,984
Ooh. [Laughs]
28
00:01:17,990 --> 00:01:20,990
Is that a well-crafted
masterpiece or what?
29
00:01:21,081 --> 00:01:22,431
It simply takes my breath away.
30
00:01:22,517 --> 00:01:25,087
The attention to
detail, the realism...
31
00:01:25,172 --> 00:01:27,912
Every time I look at it,
I see something new.
32
00:01:28,000 --> 00:01:29,130
What do you think, Mona?
33
00:01:29,219 --> 00:01:32,089
Well...
34
00:01:32,179 --> 00:01:34,619
Uh, I can see...
35
00:01:34,703 --> 00:01:36,333
An interesting highlight
pattern happening
36
00:01:36,357 --> 00:01:37,527
around the, uh...
37
00:01:37,619 --> 00:01:38,859
Ok, you know what? It looks like
38
00:01:38,924 --> 00:01:40,494
the same hair I
saw in the window
39
00:01:40,578 --> 00:01:42,538
of the korean beauty
supply place down the street.
40
00:01:43,451 --> 00:01:45,841
But then, you know, I
don't have an eye for wig art.
41
00:01:45,931 --> 00:01:47,631
Clearly. Because mister Marcel
42
00:01:47,716 --> 00:01:49,236
pours his soul into every style.
43
00:01:49,326 --> 00:01:50,846
That's right. He
does my hair, too.
44
00:01:50,936 --> 00:01:53,086
Oh, honey. Don't forget about
your appointment tomorrow.
45
00:01:53,113 --> 00:01:54,903
Oh, and remember to
bring him his soy latte
46
00:01:54,984 --> 00:01:57,604
if you want him to
use the good shampoo.
47
00:01:58,596 --> 00:02:00,416
Extra hot, extra foam,
48
00:02:00,511 --> 00:02:02,191
and I've cleared my
calendar for the whole day.
49
00:02:02,209 --> 00:02:03,599
Because like mister Marcel says,
50
00:02:03,688 --> 00:02:07,128
both: Beauty has a
schedule of its own.
51
00:02:07,214 --> 00:02:08,694
Ah, a nice way of saying
52
00:02:08,780 --> 00:02:09,980
you'll be sittin' under
the dryer for 6 hours
53
00:02:09,999 --> 00:02:11,219
readin' old issues of ebony.
54
00:02:11,305 --> 00:02:12,995
Well, where else am I gonna read
55
00:02:13,089 --> 00:02:14,569
about the current
events of my people?
56
00:02:14,612 --> 00:02:16,792
Did you know that Nelson
and Winnie Mandela
57
00:02:16,875 --> 00:02:18,435
are on the rocks?
58
00:02:18,529 --> 00:02:21,969
Yes, and we're allowed
to read and vote now, too.
59
00:02:23,708 --> 00:02:25,058
You know, I just don't get
60
00:02:25,145 --> 00:02:27,065
planning your whole life
around your hairdresser.
61
00:02:27,147 --> 00:02:30,797
Oh, Mona. This is mister Marcel.
62
00:02:30,889 --> 00:02:32,409
He islife.
63
00:02:32,500 --> 00:02:34,810
Now all I have to
do is find an outfit
64
00:02:34,893 --> 00:02:35,893
to go with my new hair.
65
00:02:35,938 --> 00:02:37,198
Well, mom, what's the occasion?
66
00:02:37,287 --> 00:02:39,767
I was just cast in a
play as a social misfit
67
00:02:39,855 --> 00:02:41,025
whose life has been plagued
68
00:02:41,117 --> 00:02:43,027
by misfortune,
sadness and shame.
69
00:02:43,119 --> 00:02:47,519
But I'm not exactly sure
where to turn for inspiration to...
70
00:02:47,602 --> 00:02:49,432
Curly cue.
71
00:02:51,432 --> 00:02:54,172
Tell me all about
your childhood.
72
00:02:57,742 --> 00:02:59,792
Wow, they're giving
this woman new boobs,
73
00:02:59,875 --> 00:03:02,525
a new nose, new lips,
and a new set of teeth.
74
00:03:02,617 --> 00:03:04,357
That is amazing.
75
00:03:04,445 --> 00:03:05,615
You know, as a therapist,
76
00:03:05,707 --> 00:03:07,747
I disagree with these
radical makeovers.
77
00:03:07,839 --> 00:03:09,489
Real change comes from inside.
78
00:03:09,580 --> 00:03:12,800
That is the only way you
will ever find true happiness.
79
00:03:12,888 --> 00:03:15,198
[All laugh]
80
00:03:15,282 --> 00:03:17,722
I almost convinced myself.
81
00:03:17,806 --> 00:03:18,806
Ooh, commercial.
82
00:03:18,894 --> 00:03:19,904
Refill on the popcorn.
83
00:03:19,982 --> 00:03:21,072
Let's see what else is on.
84
00:03:21,157 --> 00:03:22,637
Ok, but turn it right back.
85
00:03:22,724 --> 00:03:23,924
I don't wanna miss the
part where her kids cry
86
00:03:23,942 --> 00:03:26,162
'cause they don't
recognize "new mommy."
87
00:03:26,249 --> 00:03:28,339
I can't believe you
broke your foot.
88
00:03:28,425 --> 00:03:30,245
Damn cats.
89
00:03:30,340 --> 00:03:32,430
I forgot to scoop their
kitty litter for 2 days
90
00:03:32,516 --> 00:03:34,076
and they pushed
the box into my path
91
00:03:34,170 --> 00:03:35,250
in the middle of the night.
92
00:03:35,302 --> 00:03:37,392
Hey.
93
00:03:37,478 --> 00:03:39,698
Isn't that Dee Dee's
ex man, Carter del toro?
94
00:03:39,784 --> 00:03:41,184
He sure disappeared quick.
95
00:03:41,264 --> 00:03:42,744
Must've met big girl.
96
00:03:42,831 --> 00:03:44,461
I bet they're interviewing
him about his book.
97
00:03:44,485 --> 00:03:46,745
Turn the channel before
Dee Dee sees and gets upset.
98
00:03:46,835 --> 00:03:49,315
It's been 3 months. How long
does it take that girl to heal?
99
00:03:49,403 --> 00:03:52,013
I got over your father
in a long weekend.
100
00:03:52,101 --> 00:03:54,801
Dee Dee, look who's on TV!
101
00:03:54,886 --> 00:03:56,526
Announcer: He sat
down for this interview.
102
00:03:56,584 --> 00:03:57,724
Carter?
103
00:03:57,802 --> 00:03:59,852
So, Carter del toro,
your latest book,
104
00:03:59,935 --> 00:04:01,415
a bullet before
bedtime is number one
105
00:04:01,502 --> 00:04:03,722
on the New York
times best seller list.
106
00:04:03,808 --> 00:04:04,938
That has to feel great, huh?
107
00:04:05,027 --> 00:04:06,197
Yes, it does.
108
00:04:06,289 --> 00:04:08,339
I'm truly overwhelmed
by the response.
109
00:04:08,422 --> 00:04:10,902
Speaking of response,
you certainly have a lot of it
110
00:04:10,989 --> 00:04:12,119
from your female fans,
111
00:04:12,208 --> 00:04:14,298
and the question
on everyone's mind...
112
00:04:14,384 --> 00:04:16,784
Is Carter del toro
on or off the market?
113
00:04:16,865 --> 00:04:19,735
Well, I don't really like
talking about my personal life.
114
00:04:19,824 --> 00:04:22,094
But I'm glad people
are enjoying the book.
115
00:04:22,174 --> 00:04:24,264
I see. Speaking of enjoying,
116
00:04:24,351 --> 00:04:25,441
who does Carter del toro
117
00:04:25,526 --> 00:04:27,746
enjoy spending his
private time with?
118
00:04:27,832 --> 00:04:29,252
You're not gonna
give this up, are you?
119
00:04:29,269 --> 00:04:30,439
[Laughs] Of course I will.
120
00:04:30,531 --> 00:04:32,181
But speaking of giving it up,
121
00:04:32,272 --> 00:04:33,972
who does Carter del toro...
122
00:04:34,056 --> 00:04:36,446
Ok, ok, yes, yes.
123
00:04:36,537 --> 00:04:38,927
I am seeing someone special.
124
00:04:39,017 --> 00:04:40,797
Walk-down-the-aisle special
125
00:04:40,889 --> 00:04:42,759
or park-down-the-block special?
126
00:04:42,847 --> 00:04:45,067
Have you even read my book?
127
00:04:45,154 --> 00:04:48,164
[Laughs] Oh, you...
128
00:04:50,507 --> 00:04:53,287
Ok, that's enough of that.
129
00:04:53,380 --> 00:04:54,990
I'm sorry, Dee Dee.
I know it was hard
130
00:04:55,077 --> 00:04:57,777
hearing that Carter's
seeing someone else.
131
00:04:57,862 --> 00:04:59,212
Did he say that?
132
00:04:59,299 --> 00:05:01,179
I guess I was too distracted
by his face powder.
133
00:05:01,257 --> 00:05:03,777
It was a bit on
the orangey side.
134
00:05:03,868 --> 00:05:06,178
You don't have
to be strong for us.
135
00:05:06,262 --> 00:05:08,612
I'm fine. I'm
just a little tired.
136
00:05:08,699 --> 00:05:11,569
I'm gonna go now.
137
00:05:11,659 --> 00:05:13,139
Bye.
138
00:05:14,531 --> 00:05:17,801
Ok, maybe it was too soon
for Dee Dee to see Carter.
139
00:05:17,882 --> 00:05:21,542
Anyway, damage is done.
Back to the boob job chick.
140
00:05:21,625 --> 00:05:22,835
Oh, we missed it.
141
00:05:22,931 --> 00:05:25,241
The kids are already
runnin' away from her.
142
00:05:30,765 --> 00:05:32,155
Hey, you still lookin'
143
00:05:32,244 --> 00:05:34,164
for somethin' to do with
Dee Dee to cheer her up?
144
00:05:34,203 --> 00:05:36,553
Yeah, seeing Carter on
TV last night hit her hard.
145
00:05:36,640 --> 00:05:37,820
You got any ideas?
146
00:05:37,902 --> 00:05:39,822
Well, when I need a boost,
147
00:05:39,904 --> 00:05:43,304
I always drop by
"girls, girls, girls."
148
00:05:43,386 --> 00:05:45,166
Spencer.
149
00:05:45,257 --> 00:05:46,347
My bad.
150
00:05:46,433 --> 00:05:49,913
I mean, "ladies,
ladies, ladies."
151
00:05:50,001 --> 00:05:51,391
I'm sorry. When I said "ideas,"
152
00:05:51,481 --> 00:05:53,701
I meant ones
that weren't idiotic.
153
00:05:53,788 --> 00:05:56,358
Shine and rise.
Coffee's percolatin',
154
00:05:56,443 --> 00:05:58,493
and the work day
has officially begun.
155
00:05:58,575 --> 00:05:59,725
The morning paper
for your perusal.
156
00:05:59,750 --> 00:06:01,010
Oh.
157
00:06:01,099 --> 00:06:02,409
It's almost lunchtime.
158
00:06:02,492 --> 00:06:05,062
This is last week's paper.
159
00:06:05,147 --> 00:06:09,017
So it is. Oh, well, "a" for
effort. What are we doing?
160
00:06:09,107 --> 00:06:11,887
Looking for a Carter
del toro diversion.
161
00:06:11,980 --> 00:06:13,550
Ooh, I caught his
interview last night.
162
00:06:13,634 --> 00:06:15,034
How terrible was that?
163
00:06:15,113 --> 00:06:16,203
I know. Dee Dee was crushed
164
00:06:16,288 --> 00:06:17,728
when she heard he
was dating someone.
165
00:06:17,812 --> 00:06:19,212
I was talkin' about
his face powder.
166
00:06:19,291 --> 00:06:20,601
A bit on the orangey side.
167
00:06:20,684 --> 00:06:22,514
But, of course,
Dee Dee's welfare
168
00:06:22,599 --> 00:06:24,989
was first and
foremost on my mind.
169
00:06:25,080 --> 00:06:26,730
Yeah, I'm sure it was.
170
00:06:26,821 --> 00:06:29,001
Hey! Do you want me
to put out my feelers
171
00:06:29,084 --> 00:06:30,874
and find out who
Carter's new whore is?
172
00:06:30,955 --> 00:06:32,435
I can do it. I know people.
173
00:06:32,522 --> 00:06:34,542
And just for fun, we can
harass her and make her cry.
174
00:06:34,568 --> 00:06:35,868
Who's in?
175
00:06:36,874 --> 00:06:39,364
No one. I've been
nursing Dee Dee
176
00:06:39,442 --> 00:06:40,512
through this
break-up for months,
177
00:06:40,530 --> 00:06:42,100
and she's finally
feeling better.
178
00:06:42,184 --> 00:06:43,864
So I'm not gonna let this
turn into another excuse
179
00:06:43,881 --> 00:06:45,671
for her to lay in
bed eating 1/2 a bag
180
00:06:45,753 --> 00:06:48,193
of reduced fat soy chips.
181
00:06:48,277 --> 00:06:50,407
That's big for her.
182
00:06:50,497 --> 00:06:51,927
I know what will
cheer Dee Dee up.
183
00:06:52,020 --> 00:06:54,280
A night out with me
at my favorite boy bar.
184
00:06:54,370 --> 00:06:55,830
There's nothing like a
room full of sweaty men
185
00:06:55,850 --> 00:06:57,370
dancing in net shirts
and leather chaps
186
00:06:57,460 --> 00:07:00,070
to make her feel
good about herself.
187
00:07:00,158 --> 00:07:01,348
You know, when she said "ideas,"
188
00:07:01,377 --> 00:07:04,467
she meant ones
that weren't idiotic.
189
00:07:05,076 --> 00:07:06,226
Hey, you know,
I've heard Dee Dee
190
00:07:06,251 --> 00:07:07,821
talk about this
photographer before.
191
00:07:07,905 --> 00:07:09,825
She's having a showing
tonight, and it's perfect.
192
00:07:09,907 --> 00:07:10,947
Pretentious art for her.
193
00:07:11,039 --> 00:07:12,519
Free wine and cheese for me.
194
00:07:12,606 --> 00:07:14,216
I like wine and cheese.
195
00:07:14,303 --> 00:07:15,613
And I like free.
196
00:07:15,696 --> 00:07:18,046
And I like an empty
office. Get out.
197
00:07:23,138 --> 00:07:26,138
Mona, thanks for
getting me out tonight.
198
00:07:26,228 --> 00:07:28,398
Yeah. Let's just
have a good time.
199
00:07:28,491 --> 00:07:31,021
Ooh, starting with the vino.
200
00:07:31,886 --> 00:07:34,446
Hmm, a picture
of some blurry fruit.
201
00:07:34,541 --> 00:07:37,071
Man, I wouldn't pay
18 bucks for that.
202
00:07:37,152 --> 00:07:40,112
It's a flower. And it's 1,800.
203
00:07:40,198 --> 00:07:42,368
Man, that's the
best hustle I've seen
204
00:07:42,462 --> 00:07:44,512
since my cousin shay
shay was selling tube socks
205
00:07:44,594 --> 00:07:47,604
and Internet service
out of his trunk.
206
00:07:48,206 --> 00:07:49,636
This place bores me.
207
00:07:49,730 --> 00:07:51,730
I was hopeful when I
saw the initials on the door,
208
00:07:51,819 --> 00:07:55,389
then I realized it stood
for fine arts gallery.
209
00:07:56,388 --> 00:07:59,388
I'm going out for a smoke.
210
00:08:06,050 --> 00:08:08,310
Composition on
this is incredible.
211
00:08:08,400 --> 00:08:09,730
Look how the objects
in the foreground
212
00:08:09,750 --> 00:08:11,270
heighten the depth of field.
213
00:08:11,360 --> 00:08:14,490
Yeah. That tree looks big.
214
00:08:15,930 --> 00:08:17,190
Dee Dee, did I tell you
215
00:08:17,279 --> 00:08:18,559
your hair looks especially
fabu this evening.
216
00:08:18,585 --> 00:08:19,795
Can I touch it? Thanks.
217
00:08:19,890 --> 00:08:21,890
It's the magic of mister Marcel.
218
00:08:21,979 --> 00:08:22,979
Carter's here.
219
00:08:23,024 --> 00:08:24,374
What? Where?
220
00:08:24,460 --> 00:08:26,050
It's so silky. I want to
roll around naked in it.
221
00:08:26,070 --> 00:08:28,290
He was just in the hall.
222
00:08:28,377 --> 00:08:29,597
And it smells so sweet.
223
00:08:29,683 --> 00:08:30,753
What is that,
hyacinth, tuberose?
224
00:08:30,771 --> 00:08:31,771
I think it's Jasmine.
225
00:08:31,859 --> 00:08:33,139
What should we do? I don't know.
226
00:08:33,164 --> 00:08:35,824
I can't stroke and
think at the same time.
227
00:08:36,559 --> 00:08:38,169
Oh, Dee Dee, let's go.
228
00:08:38,256 --> 00:08:39,606
I'm not feeling so good.
229
00:08:39,693 --> 00:08:41,833
Me, neither. Must be
something in the spicy Jack.
230
00:08:41,912 --> 00:08:43,872
Well, I feel fine.
231
00:08:44,959 --> 00:08:45,959
Carter.
232
00:08:46,003 --> 00:08:47,443
Dee Dee.
233
00:08:47,527 --> 00:08:48,347
Carter. Mona.
234
00:08:48,440 --> 00:08:50,360
Carter. who are you?
235
00:08:50,442 --> 00:08:51,532
It doesn't matter.
236
00:08:51,618 --> 00:08:53,138
I just don't like
being left out.
237
00:08:53,228 --> 00:08:56,008
It's good to see
you. You look well.
238
00:08:56,100 --> 00:08:58,280
Thanks. You look well yourself.
239
00:08:58,363 --> 00:09:01,323
If I see his whore,
I'm taking her down.
240
00:09:01,410 --> 00:09:03,370
So, it was good seeing everyone.
241
00:09:03,455 --> 00:09:05,235
Enjoy your evening.
242
00:09:05,327 --> 00:09:07,067
Sorry. We tried
to get you out bef...
243
00:09:07,155 --> 00:09:09,895
It's ok. I just need
a moment alone.
244
00:09:09,984 --> 00:09:11,904
I'm going to find
the ladies' room.
245
00:09:11,986 --> 00:09:14,336
Oh, of all the
spots in the city,
246
00:09:14,423 --> 00:09:16,733
I would pick the one place
where Carter shows up.
247
00:09:16,817 --> 00:09:19,427
Don't beat yourself
up about it, hon.
248
00:09:19,515 --> 00:09:20,815
Of all the spots in the city,
249
00:09:20,908 --> 00:09:24,258
you picked the one place
where Carter shows up.
250
00:09:24,346 --> 00:09:25,346
Thanks, Spence.
251
00:09:25,390 --> 00:09:27,180
Well, on the bright side,
252
00:09:27,262 --> 00:09:30,532
it would've been worse if we
ran into him at the strip club.
253
00:09:32,223 --> 00:09:33,833
Hey, Adam.
254
00:09:33,921 --> 00:09:37,321
Someone paid 5,000 bucks
for one of this chick's pictures.
255
00:09:37,402 --> 00:09:40,492
I think photography's
gonna be my new hobby.
256
00:09:40,580 --> 00:09:43,100
If you need a model, I posed
for underwear ads in college.
257
00:09:43,191 --> 00:09:47,411
I had the second most popular
crotch in the Sunday circulars.
258
00:09:47,499 --> 00:09:49,369
Shawn Boston had
the most popular,
259
00:09:49,458 --> 00:09:51,548
but everybody knows he stuffed.
260
00:09:51,634 --> 00:09:54,514
Have you guys seen Dee
Dee? She's not in the bathroom.
261
00:09:54,594 --> 00:09:55,904
Maybe she took a cab home.
262
00:09:55,986 --> 00:09:57,636
Without telling me?
That's not like her.
263
00:09:57,727 --> 00:10:01,377
Why would she leave? They
just put out fresh cheddar.
264
00:10:01,470 --> 00:10:04,650
I'm gonna go look for her.
265
00:10:08,042 --> 00:10:09,482
[Moaning]
266
00:10:09,565 --> 00:10:11,045
Dee Dee?
267
00:10:13,743 --> 00:10:14,923
Dee Dee!
268
00:10:15,005 --> 00:10:16,085
Mona. Carter!
269
00:10:16,180 --> 00:10:17,440
Ok, saying each other's names
270
00:10:17,529 --> 00:10:18,589
every time we have
an awkward moment
271
00:10:18,618 --> 00:10:20,318
actually makes it more awkward.
272
00:10:20,402 --> 00:10:24,892
It might be a tad less so if
I could just re-hook my bra.
273
00:10:31,631 --> 00:10:33,431
Carter, you just announced
on national television
274
00:10:33,458 --> 00:10:35,028
that you're seeing
someone special,
275
00:10:35,112 --> 00:10:37,592
and here you are
tonguing down my sister?
276
00:10:37,680 --> 00:10:39,620
Come on, Dee Dee, let's
go. This is not your fault.
277
00:10:39,639 --> 00:10:41,289
You were vulnerable and horny,
278
00:10:41,379 --> 00:10:43,029
and that is a
recipe for ho-cake.
279
00:10:43,120 --> 00:10:44,560
Mona, wait.
280
00:10:44,644 --> 00:10:46,064
What? You can fix
your bra in the car.
281
00:10:46,080 --> 00:10:49,170
No, no, no, no. Mona, I
am the someone special.
282
00:10:49,257 --> 00:10:52,427
Oh, of course you
are. You're very special.
283
00:10:52,521 --> 00:10:55,181
Now, come on, let's go.
Don't embarrass yourself.
284
00:10:55,263 --> 00:10:57,053
Mona, listen.
285
00:10:57,134 --> 00:10:59,484
Dee Dee and I have been
seeing each other for over a month.
286
00:10:59,571 --> 00:11:01,011
You mean... yeah.
287
00:11:01,095 --> 00:11:02,835
So, all this time,
you two have been...
288
00:11:02,923 --> 00:11:04,123
Pretty much. And
you just let me...
289
00:11:04,141 --> 00:11:05,841
I know. Oh, thanks
a lot, Dee Dee.
290
00:11:05,926 --> 00:11:08,276
Ok, I don't know
what you two just said,
291
00:11:08,363 --> 00:11:12,063
but I'm guessing you're
gonna need a ride home.
292
00:11:13,847 --> 00:11:17,067
You know, if this photography
thing's gonna pay off,
293
00:11:17,154 --> 00:11:20,074
I'm gonna need
a lot of practice.
294
00:11:20,157 --> 00:11:21,897
Right there, babe.
295
00:11:21,985 --> 00:11:23,115
Yeah.
296
00:11:23,204 --> 00:11:25,164
You know, Dee Dee
has got some nerve.
297
00:11:25,249 --> 00:11:26,949
I was a good sister to her.
298
00:11:27,034 --> 00:11:29,564
All her misery over Carter,
I was there for her and i...
299
00:11:29,645 --> 00:11:31,125
Hold it!
300
00:11:32,474 --> 00:11:33,474
Where was I?
301
00:11:33,518 --> 00:11:34,258
You were there for her.
302
00:11:34,345 --> 00:11:35,385
I was there for her.
303
00:11:35,477 --> 00:11:36,907
And this is the
thanks that I get?
304
00:11:37,000 --> 00:11:38,260
I mean... [Knock on door]
305
00:11:40,003 --> 00:11:45,793
Ooh, I'm gonna call
this one, sister kills sister.
306
00:11:46,706 --> 00:11:49,056
And... fight!
307
00:11:49,143 --> 00:11:50,453
Go home!
308
00:11:50,535 --> 00:11:54,755
That's cool. I only have
2 shots left anyway.
309
00:11:56,063 --> 00:11:58,283
Make that one shot.
310
00:12:00,589 --> 00:12:02,719
Mona, I'm sorry I lied.
311
00:12:02,809 --> 00:12:03,999
But too many people got involved
312
00:12:04,027 --> 00:12:05,727
in my relationship
with Carter before.
313
00:12:05,812 --> 00:12:07,012
That's a big reason we broke up.
314
00:12:07,030 --> 00:12:08,420
So we wanted to keep it private.
315
00:12:08,510 --> 00:12:09,750
Oh, that explains why
you were making out
316
00:12:09,772 --> 00:12:11,772
at a public art gallery.
317
00:12:11,861 --> 00:12:13,731
I told Carter I was
going to be there,
318
00:12:13,820 --> 00:12:15,650
and he thought it
would be fun to drop by
319
00:12:15,735 --> 00:12:16,555
and cuddle up on some cashmere,
320
00:12:16,648 --> 00:12:17,908
but then you guys saw him,
321
00:12:17,998 --> 00:12:18,688
and things didn't
go as planned...
322
00:12:18,781 --> 00:12:20,091
And before you knew it,
323
00:12:20,174 --> 00:12:21,974
you were freaking each
other behind a curtain.
324
00:12:22,002 --> 00:12:23,002
No!
325
00:12:23,090 --> 00:12:24,660
Well, yeah.
326
00:12:24,744 --> 00:12:27,624
So you just let me make a
fool out of myself all this time,
327
00:12:27,703 --> 00:12:29,713
taking care of you,
checking on you?
328
00:12:29,792 --> 00:12:30,882
I made you soup!
329
00:12:30,967 --> 00:12:34,407
All the stuff you
did really helped.
330
00:12:34,492 --> 00:12:36,542
And the heartburn
I got from your soup
331
00:12:36,625 --> 00:12:38,535
kept my mind off
of Carter for weeks.
332
00:12:38,627 --> 00:12:39,847
But then he called to say hi.
333
00:12:39,933 --> 00:12:41,263
And we met for an
innocent cup of coffee...
334
00:12:41,282 --> 00:12:43,152
And next thing you
know, your clothes fell off
335
00:12:43,240 --> 00:12:44,550
and you were in bed together.
336
00:12:44,633 --> 00:12:45,553
No!
337
00:12:45,634 --> 00:12:47,594
Well, yeah.
338
00:12:47,679 --> 00:12:50,379
But we didn't
make it to the bed.
339
00:12:50,465 --> 00:12:51,725
Look, I like Carter.
340
00:12:51,814 --> 00:12:53,564
But it took a lot for
you to get over him.
341
00:12:53,642 --> 00:12:55,122
But it's different this time.
342
00:12:55,209 --> 00:12:56,689
His kids don't even
know about us,
343
00:12:56,776 --> 00:12:58,386
which is hard
because I adore them,
344
00:12:58,473 --> 00:12:59,873
but it's better this way.
345
00:12:59,953 --> 00:13:01,233
We're just keeping
things fun and casual.
346
00:13:01,258 --> 00:13:03,088
You don't do casual.
347
00:13:03,173 --> 00:13:04,653
Well, I'm doing it now.
348
00:13:04,740 --> 00:13:06,060
I think this is
dangerous for you.
349
00:13:06,089 --> 00:13:07,699
You were totally
in love with this guy,
350
00:13:07,787 --> 00:13:09,417
and if you think you can get
back in it without getting hurt,
351
00:13:09,440 --> 00:13:11,010
you're wrong.
352
00:13:11,094 --> 00:13:12,974
This is exactly why I
didn't tell you about him.
353
00:13:13,009 --> 00:13:14,919
Fine. But when this
blows up in your face,
354
00:13:15,011 --> 00:13:17,451
I'm not gonna be there to help
you pick up the pieces again.
355
00:13:17,535 --> 00:13:19,315
Good. Because I
don't need you to.
356
00:13:22,279 --> 00:13:23,319
Damn!
357
00:13:23,411 --> 00:13:24,801
Could you come out again?
358
00:13:24,891 --> 00:13:26,531
I forgot to twist the
fast forward thingy.
359
00:13:29,591 --> 00:13:32,591
You look good when
you mad. Hold on.
360
00:13:43,083 --> 00:13:45,003
I hope you bought
a lot of those.
361
00:13:45,085 --> 00:13:46,955
I had 4, but Kai smashed one
362
00:13:47,043 --> 00:13:49,703
after I took a picture of her
smacking Dave upside the head
363
00:13:49,785 --> 00:13:51,065
for eating the last tootsie pop.
364
00:13:51,091 --> 00:13:52,441
Oh, too bad for Dave.
365
00:13:52,527 --> 00:13:54,357
Especially since I'm
the one who ate it.
366
00:13:55,008 --> 00:13:57,748
Incoming scoop. I was at
lunch gossiping about Carter
367
00:13:57,837 --> 00:13:59,417
and how we all thought
he had a new whore,
368
00:13:59,447 --> 00:14:01,377
but it turned out the whore
was just Dee Dee and...
369
00:14:01,405 --> 00:14:02,445
Man, what do you do,
370
00:14:02,537 --> 00:14:04,057
go to lunch and
gossip every day?
371
00:14:04,147 --> 00:14:06,797
Not when I can get me
some lunchtime lovin'.
372
00:14:06,889 --> 00:14:09,239
Anyway, when I mentioned Carter,
373
00:14:09,326 --> 00:14:10,826
my friend said that
his boyfriend's sister
374
00:14:10,850 --> 00:14:12,980
is the receptionist at
Carter's publishing company.
375
00:14:13,069 --> 00:14:14,869
She's also sleeping
with an editor, an intern,
376
00:14:14,897 --> 00:14:16,767
and a night security
guard, but I digress.
377
00:14:16,856 --> 00:14:19,816
She happens to know
that Carter's book,
378
00:14:19,902 --> 00:14:21,562
the killer wears a kimono,
379
00:14:21,643 --> 00:14:22,993
is being turned
into a miniseries,
380
00:14:23,079 --> 00:14:25,599
and he's moving to Japan
for a year, maybe more.
381
00:14:25,690 --> 00:14:27,430
Wow, that's not good.
382
00:14:27,518 --> 00:14:28,758
I know. The leads
have already been cast,
383
00:14:28,780 --> 00:14:29,930
and I didn't even
get an audition
384
00:14:29,956 --> 00:14:31,566
for the role of Mr. Fujiyama,
385
00:14:33,002 --> 00:14:36,442
the mysterious businessman
with a smile that hides his cruelty.
386
00:14:46,320 --> 00:14:48,500
So I'm staying out of
Dee Dee's mess this time,
387
00:14:48,583 --> 00:14:50,853
and I'm definitely
not making soup.
388
00:14:50,933 --> 00:14:52,983
You are not staying out of this.
389
00:14:53,066 --> 00:14:54,626
When it comes to family,
390
00:14:54,719 --> 00:14:56,649
even if they keep running
into the same old storm,
391
00:14:56,678 --> 00:14:57,878
you've gotta be standing there
392
00:14:57,940 --> 00:14:59,310
holding the umbrella
when they come back.
393
00:14:59,333 --> 00:15:02,083
Well, my arm is tired.
394
00:15:02,162 --> 00:15:03,492
Hey, haven't I always
been there for you
395
00:15:03,511 --> 00:15:05,031
and your disastrous love life?
396
00:15:05,121 --> 00:15:06,581
Lord knows, it's worn
me down to a nub.
397
00:15:06,601 --> 00:15:09,041
But I'm still here.
398
00:15:09,125 --> 00:15:10,535
And the last thing
you needed to hear
399
00:15:10,561 --> 00:15:11,561
was "I told you so."
400
00:15:11,649 --> 00:15:13,429
I believe you coined the phrase.
401
00:15:13,521 --> 00:15:15,921
Well, I'm the mama. I earned it.
402
00:15:17,090 --> 00:15:18,790
[Knock knock]
403
00:15:18,874 --> 00:15:21,014
Life is so unfair.
404
00:15:21,094 --> 00:15:23,184
I can't believe he's leaving.
405
00:15:23,270 --> 00:15:25,710
Well, Mona is here to listen.
406
00:15:27,665 --> 00:15:29,615
No notice. No warning.
407
00:15:29,711 --> 00:15:32,241
Just "bye. I'm moving to Aspen."
408
00:15:32,322 --> 00:15:33,582
Aspen?
409
00:15:33,671 --> 00:15:35,671
Yeah, that's where mister Marcel
410
00:15:35,760 --> 00:15:37,150
is opening his new salon.
411
00:15:38,459 --> 00:15:40,199
He's leaving tonight.
412
00:15:40,287 --> 00:15:41,897
He didn't even
straighten out my edges
413
00:15:41,984 --> 00:15:44,074
before he got on the plane.
414
00:15:44,160 --> 00:15:47,690
Oh, so you're not
talkin' about car... toons.
415
00:15:47,772 --> 00:15:49,472
Why would I be
talking about cartoons?
416
00:15:49,557 --> 00:15:51,077
Well, you know, 'cause sometimes
417
00:15:51,167 --> 00:15:52,297
you like to talk about 'em.
418
00:15:52,386 --> 00:15:53,466
No, I don't.
419
00:15:53,561 --> 00:15:55,911
Then why are we
talking about them?
420
00:15:55,998 --> 00:15:57,828
Look, I just came by to say
421
00:15:57,913 --> 00:15:59,613
if you hear a blood
curdling scream,
422
00:15:59,697 --> 00:16:01,127
don't call the police.
423
00:16:01,221 --> 00:16:02,941
It's just me breaking
the news to my mother.
424
00:16:05,051 --> 00:16:07,711
Oh, she doesn't even
know about Carter yet.
425
00:16:07,792 --> 00:16:09,142
This is bad.
426
00:16:09,229 --> 00:16:12,189
Not as bad as this
itch on my instep.
427
00:16:12,275 --> 00:16:14,185
Go get me a barbecue fork.
428
00:16:15,670 --> 00:16:17,320
Big Dee Dee. Not now, Phyllis.
429
00:16:17,411 --> 00:16:18,631
I'm hardly in the mood for you
430
00:16:18,716 --> 00:16:19,756
and your synthetic fibers.
431
00:16:19,804 --> 00:16:21,284
Well, I'll leave you alone
432
00:16:21,371 --> 00:16:23,241
since your wig man
left you high and dry.
433
00:16:24,200 --> 00:16:25,290
Mister Marcel?
434
00:16:25,375 --> 00:16:26,415
Left where?
435
00:16:26,507 --> 00:16:28,287
To open a salon in Aspen.
436
00:16:28,378 --> 00:16:29,728
Didn't Dee Dee tell you?
437
00:16:29,814 --> 00:16:31,164
She said she
wanted to talk to me
438
00:16:31,251 --> 00:16:32,361
about something
of great concern.
439
00:16:32,382 --> 00:16:33,582
I mean, my mind went to pregnant
440
00:16:33,601 --> 00:16:35,471
or hooked on pain killers...
441
00:16:35,559 --> 00:16:37,209
Not something as
horrendous as this!
442
00:16:40,695 --> 00:16:42,255
Well, I just lucked
into that one.
443
00:16:42,349 --> 00:16:45,269
[Pounding] Dee Dee, Dee Dee,
444
00:16:45,352 --> 00:16:46,352
Dee Dee!!!
445
00:16:48,920 --> 00:16:51,230
[Knocks]
446
00:16:53,316 --> 00:16:56,056
So when exactly are you
planning on telling Dee Dee
447
00:16:56,145 --> 00:16:57,405
you're going to Japan?
448
00:16:57,494 --> 00:16:59,374
Good evening, Mona,
and welcome to my home.
449
00:16:59,453 --> 00:17:01,133
Sorry. Hi. Love what
you've done with the place.
450
00:17:01,150 --> 00:17:03,020
Answer the question.
451
00:17:03,109 --> 00:17:05,759
First of all, that isn't
even public information.
452
00:17:05,850 --> 00:17:06,940
So how do you know that?
453
00:17:07,026 --> 00:17:08,806
I know people...
People who gossip
454
00:17:08,897 --> 00:17:10,677
over lunchtime vodka smoothies.
455
00:17:10,768 --> 00:17:13,378
I didn't wanna say
anything about my movie
456
00:17:13,467 --> 00:17:14,637
until it was final,
457
00:17:14,729 --> 00:17:16,189
and then I was gonna
tell Dee Dee today.
458
00:17:16,209 --> 00:17:18,599
But she was so broken
up over mister Marcel,
459
00:17:18,689 --> 00:17:20,129
and I know not to upset a woman
460
00:17:20,213 --> 00:17:22,653
when she's havin'
a bad hair day.
461
00:17:22,737 --> 00:17:26,307
Look, it's best to just
be honest with Dee Dee.
462
00:17:26,393 --> 00:17:28,023
But don't tell her that
I knew before she did
463
00:17:28,047 --> 00:17:29,937
or that I came over here or
that I snuck into her apartment
464
00:17:29,961 --> 00:17:31,041
and stole her palm pilot...
465
00:17:31,093 --> 00:17:32,293
Please, don't tell me any more.
466
00:17:32,312 --> 00:17:35,622
But since we're
kind of being honest,
467
00:17:35,706 --> 00:17:38,406
I will admit I have
been avoiding
468
00:17:38,492 --> 00:17:39,692
this conversation with Dee Dee
469
00:17:39,710 --> 00:17:41,580
because I know how
hard it's gonna be.
470
00:17:41,669 --> 00:17:43,669
Yeah. She puts on a good act.
471
00:17:43,758 --> 00:17:45,058
But she's in pretty deep.
472
00:17:45,151 --> 00:17:46,801
I'm not just talkin'
about Dee Dee.
473
00:17:46,891 --> 00:17:49,941
I knew we were
just fooling ourselves
474
00:17:50,025 --> 00:17:52,375
with this whole casual thing.
475
00:17:52,462 --> 00:17:54,202
Love makes you kinda stupid.
476
00:17:54,290 --> 00:17:56,420
I'm learning that.
477
00:17:56,510 --> 00:17:58,510
I can't ask her to
go to Japan with me.
478
00:17:58,599 --> 00:18:00,299
'Cause we're not ready for that.
479
00:18:00,383 --> 00:18:01,933
And I can't ask her
to put her life on hold
480
00:18:01,950 --> 00:18:03,300
while I'm over there.
481
00:18:03,995 --> 00:18:06,085
Then I think you
should talk to her.
482
00:18:06,172 --> 00:18:07,302
Let her know the deal.
483
00:18:10,480 --> 00:18:12,180
You're right.
484
00:18:12,265 --> 00:18:13,345
I'll see her tonight.
485
00:18:14,789 --> 00:18:16,619
You're a good sister, Mona...
486
00:18:16,704 --> 00:18:18,274
Aside from the lying,
487
00:18:18,358 --> 00:18:21,008
breaking and entering and theft.
488
00:18:21,100 --> 00:18:22,750
Thanks. And hey,
489
00:18:22,840 --> 00:18:25,890
if any man had to rip
out my sister's heart
490
00:18:25,974 --> 00:18:28,154
and turn her into
a blubbering mess,
491
00:18:28,237 --> 00:18:30,067
I'm glad it was you.
492
00:18:30,152 --> 00:18:32,552
Thanks.
493
00:18:32,633 --> 00:18:35,983
Hey. About those
people you know...
494
00:18:36,071 --> 00:18:38,161
I bet it was that receptionist.
495
00:18:38,247 --> 00:18:40,157
I heard she's sleeping
with one of the editors.
496
00:18:40,249 --> 00:18:42,729
Sorry. I never
reveal my sources...
497
00:18:42,817 --> 00:18:45,597
And it's not just an editor. Ah!
498
00:18:50,564 --> 00:18:53,004
♪ Fear the rising sun ♪
499
00:18:53,088 --> 00:18:57,048
♪ surrounded by everything
I want ♪ [Knock on door]
500
00:18:57,136 --> 00:18:59,826
♪ But nothing that I need ♪
501
00:18:59,921 --> 00:19:03,711
♪ I was blinded
by the uncertainty ♪
502
00:19:03,794 --> 00:19:05,934
♪ losing all my dignity ♪
503
00:19:06,014 --> 00:19:10,584
♪ sometimes what you fear
the most is what you need ♪
504
00:19:10,671 --> 00:19:13,411
♪ to find that road ♪
505
00:19:13,500 --> 00:19:16,810
♪ try to round that
curve, a lesson learned ♪
506
00:19:16,894 --> 00:19:19,904
♪ now that I have
the eyes to see ♪
507
00:19:19,984 --> 00:19:21,684
This isn't about
mister Marcel, right?
508
00:19:21,769 --> 00:19:28,779
♪ A hurricane ♪
509
00:19:28,863 --> 00:19:31,003
♪ is sometimes the only way ♪
510
00:19:31,082 --> 00:19:33,522
♪ to wash away the pain ♪
511
00:19:35,435 --> 00:19:37,125
So you two are
actually flying to Aspen
512
00:19:37,219 --> 00:19:39,439
to see mister Marcel?
513
00:19:39,526 --> 00:19:41,566
Yep. It's part of my
healing process from Carter.
514
00:19:41,658 --> 00:19:43,358
Plus, we figured
why let 1,100 miles
515
00:19:43,443 --> 00:19:44,973
come between us
and our full potential.
516
00:19:45,662 --> 00:19:49,192
And daddy got sick of hearing
mother cry herself to sleep.
517
00:19:50,014 --> 00:19:51,804
Ooh! Well, glamour calls. Ooh!
518
00:19:51,886 --> 00:19:53,406
Our appointment's in 8 hours.
519
00:19:53,496 --> 00:19:55,016
Oh! We're cutting
it close! Bye! Bye!
520
00:19:56,934 --> 00:19:58,894
Can you believe the Dee dees?
521
00:19:58,980 --> 00:20:00,630
They obsess over
the most trivial things.
522
00:20:00,721 --> 00:20:03,591
Oh, lord! Cheesy burger
is going out of business.
523
00:20:03,680 --> 00:20:06,640
No notice, no warnin',
nothin'! Just gone!
524
00:20:06,727 --> 00:20:08,077
What?! You can't take away
525
00:20:08,163 --> 00:20:09,313
one of the greatest
comforts known to man.
526
00:20:09,338 --> 00:20:10,638
I mean, where am I gonna get
527
00:20:10,731 --> 00:20:12,451
my extra thick chocolate
shakes at 3:00 A.M.?!
528
00:20:12,472 --> 00:20:14,622
You know, somethin' has got to
be done about this foolishness.
529
00:20:14,648 --> 00:20:15,948
I'll tell you what I'm gonna do.
530
00:20:16,040 --> 00:20:17,430
I'm callin' my congress person.
531
00:20:17,520 --> 00:20:19,080
Forget that. I'm
e-mailing Colin Powell.
532
00:20:20,784 --> 00:20:21,824
Does he still work for us?
533
00:20:21,874 --> 00:20:26,424
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