All language subtitles for Half And Half s03e15 Fast Track 1.eng

Cheers to my little girl
for landing a position

at the very prestigious law firm

of seriff, banks,
and Washington.

Soon to be seriff, banks,
Washington, and Thorne,

or as we'll call it,
Thorne and others.

Well, I was the
firm's top intern,

hand-picked by the
Darrell Washington,

one of esquiremagazine's
"top 10 men to watch,"

and I got paid to watch him.

[Chuckles]

After 14 years
of private school,

4 years of college, and
3 years of law school,

my business manager is ecstatic

that you've ended up with a job.

Dee Dee Thorne is finally
joining the workforce.

You do realize that's
Monday through Friday, right?

♪ Through this
journey of discovery ♪

♪ you're finding
you, I'm finding me ♪

♪ now that I have
someone special ♪

♪ who brings out the joy ♪

♪ brings out the joy ♪

♪ inside of me ♪

♪ we can become
whatever we want ♪

♪ all we need is lovin', yeah ♪

♪ that's the way I
feel it should be ♪

♪ you and me ♪

[Off-key] ♪ me ♪

So I said to Cameron,

"surely you don't expect
me to go home with you

before we finish dinner,"

and then he showed
me his ripped abs

and I said, "screw the
McNuggets, I'll get us a cab."

So Mona, we're
getting down to the wire.

What's going on
with these producers

you've been promising
me for the talent search?

Trust me, they are mega a-list,

and I am minutes away
from closing the deal.

So who are they?

You know I hate secrets.

And Jim belushi, but
that's a whole 'nother story.

Look, I know it
sounds superstitious,

but I just... i don't
want to jinx it.

Fine. You know I'm really
trusting you on this one.

And if you don't come through,

that's your ass.

Adam, your phone's
just ringing and ringing.

Oh, sorry. I'll go
turn the ringer off.

Here's the final contracts.

I dotted every "i"
and crossed every "t."

Whoo, I can breathe again.

You know, I can't believe

we actually signed Jimmy
jam and Terry Lewis,

the most successful music
producing team of all time.

I gotta go tell Kai...

Wait... wait. The
dates are wrong.

No way.

We booked them
for a year from now?

How the hell did this happen?

It must've gotten
switched at some point.

I bet it was Cheryl
in business affairs.

You know she's had it out for me

ever since I dropped her
off at the b.A.R.T. Station

after we had, uh... relations.

She lives in Oakland
and I was tired.

You can't blame this
on business affairs.

I trusted you
with these details.

I know, but don't worry.

I think I got a plan
that will fix this.

What are we gonna do, change all the
computers and calendars to next year?

Ok, then give me a minute
to come up with plan b.

So you're telling me in
order to get Jimmy and Terry

all I have to do is find
a new producer for pink,

pay for a Learjet to fly
them in from London,

and get p. Diddy to
cancel his white party?

Let me get back to you.

No, I'm not crying.

[Voice breaks] It's
just a bad connection.

Oh, baby, I hate
to see you so upset.

Have some gumbo.

Nothing relieves
stress like gumbo.

Yesterday you said nothing
relieves stress like chicken pot pie.

Well, yesterday I had chicken
pot pie, today I have gumbo.

Now eat up.

[Sighs] I can't believe I blew the
biggest opportunity of my career.

But it's my own fault because I put
all my energy into my first choice...

Oh, baby, I know what you mean. I
did the same thing with your father.

Mom, you're not helping.

I'm running out of time here and
I need somebody with a name.

Have you tried Morgan Freeman?

He's a celebrity
and he likes music.

And if you need
help sealing the deal,

I'd be willing to have
dinner and then some.

I just got the worst news ever.

Bangs are going out of style?

No. The firm that offered
me the job is downsizing.

And my mentor Darrell Washington
and I got downsized with it.

You lost your job
before you even got it?

Girl, let me get you some gumbo.

Nothing relieves
stress like some gumbo.

This is gonna take
a whole lot more

than your mom's
leftover leftovers.

Oh, please. You'll just get daddy
to fix it for you like you always do.

Mona, I'm a grown woman.

I don't make a habit of running to
my daddy every time I have a problem.

Didn't you get him to send
over his mechanic this morning

because your
beemer had a flat tire?

That's different.
That involves grease.

And didn't he get
you this very job?

No. Dad's connections might
have gotten me in the door,

but I'm the one who
earned the internship

and I'm the one
who got the job offer.

Then problem solved.

If you got this without daddy,
you can fix this without daddy.

Of course I can. And I will.

And you can't have your mother
talk to daddy about fixing it either.

Damn you.

Hey.

I brought you some
forgive-me brownies.

You think you can make
this better with food?

But they're homemade.

All right, they're from a mix.

All right, I bought 'em.

Oh, all right, I found
'em in the break room

and took 'em before thick
Nicky from promotions got to 'em.

But my heart was
in the right place.

Spencer, my job is on
the line thanks to you.

The finalists are
gonna be here on Friday

and we only have a week to
get them ready for the showcase.

And now they don't have any
producers to get ready with.

If the finalists tank, Kai's
not gonna sign any of them.

So, look, I need to think.

So close the door
on your way out...

If you can do that right.

Wow. You're really mad at me.

Maybe because I was up all night

trying to find replacements
because of your screw-up.

Mona, I can't tell
you how bad I feel.

I'd better take these
brownies back to thick Nicky,

'cause if she gets hungry,
nobody's own meal is safe.

Kai's looking for you.

I told her you were out
getting your hair done.

She found that hard to believe,
but it bought you a little time.

Thanks. I just, I don't want to
talk to her until I figure this out.

Have you heard back
from the other producers?

Yeah. 3 are in the studio,
2 are out of the country,

and one is getting
calf implants.

And that's not where he
needs a little extra, believe me.

I just can't believe the
showcase is falling apart.

Mona. Every cloud
has a silver lining.

Let me tell you a little story.

The time: Last Monday.

The place: The coffee station.

You've been spending way
too much time with big Dee Dee.

You can't spend too much time
in the presence of greatness.

Anyway, Dave was arguing with Harry
from accounting about some unpaid invoice.

Well, it got more heated
than either of them expected.

And the next thing you know,

they were having a vicious slap
fight with the hot chocolate packets.

All the while I stood
calmly by, observing.

Got to be a point
in there somewhere.

My point is there's
a similarity in that

and what's happening
between you and Spencer.

Hello! I'm not involved
in either conflict.

For once I'm blameless.
My job's secure.

You call that a silver lining?

No. I call it a
frigging miracle.

So you can see, from
my academic record

and my stellar performance here,

that I am an asset to your firm,

and it would behoove
you to keep me.

I will work diligently
without complaint.

I truly believe it is in the
best interest of this firm

to reconsider my
reconsideration.

I must say I'm very impressed

by the eloquence of
your speech, Ms. Thorne.

And even more impressed

that you managed to slip past
security and get in here to see me.

You can file that
under resourceful.

Now, can I file my
name under employed?

There's no question in my mind
that you belong with this firm.

Ah, I knew you'd agree.

Unfortunately, I have
no say in the matter.

You see, my position has
been eliminated as well.

But you're the seriff of
seriff, banks, and Washington.

If Washington is gone
and seriff is gone, then...

Yes. It's now just
the law firm of banks.

May he rot in hell.

Ohh... what am I
supposed to do now?

Same thing I'm doing...
Start looking for a job.

With the economy the way it
is, I'm gonna call my daddy first.

He's got great connections.

There's got to be at least one
job opening in the legal profession.

You think it's too late to send
my application in to the apprentice?

I could be the crazy black one.

No child of mine will
be an underling to a man

who has such a profoundly unnatural
relationship with his blow dryer.

Mom, this is so much harder
than I thought it would be.

Every other good firm has
already filled their positions.

Sweetheart, please
let your father help you.

I mean, what's the use
of being well-connected

if you don't use
the connections?

I don't want daddy involved.

Then let me help you.

I have been dying to
cash in on some of the dirt

I've collected over the years at
those boring city council bruncheons.

Mother, that would be
unethical. What kind of dirt?

Let's just say what some
of our local male judges

wear under their robes is racy,
Lacey, and definitely hand-washable.

I can make you a judge
with one phone call.

Mom, I'm gonna
do this on my own.

But thanks for offering to commit
a felony to advance my career.

Wait till you see what I do
to get you a rich husband.

So that's the whole story, Kai, and I
take full responsibility for what happened.

But I'm sure that the
showcase will be a success

even without
celebrity producers.

Well, say something.

I say the truth sucks.

Yeah, you need
to go with my idea.

I'm not doing that.

Trust me. Kai is not gonna fire
somebody who has two months to live.

I'm not telling Kai I have dengue
fever. I don't even know what it is.

Nobody does.

That's the beauty.

It got me out of two leases
and a commitment ceremony.

I'm gonna use it to
get out of jury duty.

I've run out of wisdom teeth.

You've run out of wisdom.

That's why we're in this mess.

Just... I'm gonna
have to find a way

to talk to Jimmy
and Terry alone.

No agents, no managers, and
no stories of imminent death.

Mona: You'll just get
daddy to fix it for you.

Big Dee Dee: Sweetheart,
please let your father help you.

No! No.

That is weak, and I
am better than that.

[Telephone rings]

Hello?

Hey, Dee, it's daddy.
Did you just call me?

Uh... yeah.

I just called to say hi.

Hi.

Uh-oh. I recognize that
tone from your mother.

You need something.

Are you gonna
wear it or drive it?

I do need something.

I need...

To let you know that...

I love you.

I love you, too. Bye!

Damn caller I.D.

Dee Dee, this thing with the
producers has gotten... dad.

What are you doing here?

Uh, Dee Dee was just catching
me up on what's going on with her.

I knew she'd get around to it.

Tea, Mona? It's hot and
you might burn your tongue,

which would keep you from
saying something you shouldn't.

[Cell phone ringing]

Uh-oh.

Sorry, girls, I
gotta take this one.

It's American express.

You know, ever
since my heart attack

they always give me a heads-up
when your mother's on a shopping spree.

Break it to me gently, yolanda.
I got my medicine standing by.

I knew you'd go
to daddy to fix this.

I haven't told him anything about
my situation and I'm not gonna.

But that would be
completely out of character.

How could I be judgmental if
you keep changing up on me?

I like to keep you guessing.

But it has been hard
not to ask daddy for help,

especially once I realized I'd
exhausted all my other resources.

I guess we both
needed a plan b, huh?

Yeah, but I've never
needed one before.

Usually by this time, fate has
stepped in and rescued me.

Well, Dee Dee, you just have
to have faith in your own ability.

But I do have to give you
credit for not running to dad

when the law firm
rescinded their offer.

What?! Sweetheart, why
didn't you say something?

I could fix that
with one phone call.

Hey, I didn't tell him, you did.

[Knock on door]

You.

Isn't the cloud over
my head dark enough?

Well, I'm here to lift it up, 'cause I
got Jimmy and Terry on the phone.

They've rearranged their
schedule and they'll be here today.

If you're lying you're gonna
get a stapler to the head.

No, it's true.

I just did what any strong male
professional in my position would do...

Cry like a woman
till they said "yes."

Ha ha ha! Thank you! I
can't believe you did it!

Ah, it was your idea.

Besides, I was the one
who messed things up.

I couldn't let
you take the fall.

'Cause you know I would
have put a staple in your head.

I'm gonna go tell
Kai the good news.

Thank you!

Yes.

I take it things
are back on track?

Yep, and I owe it all to you.

How long did you tell Jimmy
and Terry Mona had to live?

3 months.

I thought the extra month would make
it less of a bummer being around her.

Out of thousands of submissions,
you are the best of the best.

I know most of you thought
you'd never get a shot like this,

but you did. You
deserve it. Don't blow it.

I love it when Kai
takes charge like this.

Mm-hmm. The strength, the
power. I feel oddly aroused.

But she's a woman.

Well, everyone has a flaw.

This is going to be an
intense and exciting week.

And it's already started out
with a highlight... you've met me.

And now Mona Thorne, my wisely
chosen protege, has a special surprise.

I'm about to bring out 2
legends in the music business.

Now these guys will help
determine who gets a deal with us.

I'm as thrilled to
introduce them

as you're gonna be
to work with them.

I give you grammy
award-winning super-producers

Jimmy jam and Terry Lewis!

[Cheers and applause]

[Applause stops]

Well, obviously you
know who we are.

And if you don't,
you shouldn't be here.

Yes, this is correct, Jimmy jam.

We came here to hear about you.

So, we're gonna get
started right over... here.

I'm chip days,

and I'm a 24-year-old
singer-songwriter from the atl,

by way of hartsville,
south Carolina.

I'm Tiffany...

And I'm Serena, and we are pol.

We're singer-songwriters
from New York.

I work in merchandising,
and Serena works at a bank.

I'm Craig... and I'm zaena.

I'm an 18-year-old
singer-songwriter...

And I'm a 22-year-old
songwriter/rapper

and a part-time construction
worker from the south side of Chicago.

I'm yasmeen, I'm
22, I'm from Oakland,

and I've been a singer-songwriter
for the last 4 years.

And we're jam balaya from L.A.

I'm Sean... I'm marson...

I'm Regina. I'm Andrew.

And when we're
not playing music,

Andrew and myself are
waiters, Regina's in marketing,

and marson's a photographer.

Now that we're done with
the Kumbaya, let's get to work.

Mona looked pretty good
for somebody in her condition.

She's not contagious, is she?

No.

Well, today was a
total waste of makeup.

Speak for yourself... oh,
that's right, you always do.

Look, I know I get paid to
listen to people complain,

but by the time I got to
my last patient, I was fried.

And after she droned on

about having to stare at the
computer screen all day, I snapped.

"Oh, you hate your job?

"Well, there's a support group
for that. It's called everybody!"

And when are you seeing
your shrink again, ma?

Tuesday.

And I hope she's in a better
mood than she was the last time.

Oh. Hey, Phyllis.

Hey.

Mona, can I use your laptop?

I'm researching new law
firms and my dsl's not working.

You're still
looking for that job?

Yep. The search continues.

I stopped dad from
making that call.

It wouldn't have worked
anyway. The man has no juice.

I don't know why you
put him on a pedestal.

Ok, I do know... makes it
easier to look him in the eye.

I'm just gonna keep looking

until I find a job on my own.

Because I chose to
believe my big sister

who said if I have faith in my
abilities, something good will happen.

Something good
will happen, right?

Dee, what makes life interesting

is not always knowing
what's gonna happen next.

[Knock on door]

Oh, excuse me.

Mona Thorne? Mm-hmm.

These are for you.

Really? Really?

Thank you.

Ok. Ooh!

Oh, they're from
Jimmy and Terry.

"For a brave girl in
these trying final days."

What does that mean?

Uh, I guess it means the
finalists are all so talented

it's gonna be tough
deciding who we'll sign.

But wasn't it thoughtful
of them to send these?

It sure was.

Usually to score
flowers this nice,

you've got to be
dying or something.

I believe I have a small
Asian man to crush.

And I am extremely embarrassed

and a little disappointed
to admit I am not dying.

And I understand completely
if you want to back out.

Come on, girl, that's not us.

We always knew Spencer's
story was a little shady.

But we love what you're doing
here, so you can count us in.

[Softly] Great!

Yeah, and besides, we may have a
chance to transform somebody's life.

Get a chance to take
a break from the studio

and possibly get a little sleep.

Hmm, sleep. I've heard of that.

[Chuckles]

Well, I love you guys,

and thank you for telling me

that Spencer is the one who
told you I only had 3 months to live.

Now, if you'll excuse me, I
have a large black man to crush.

So, if you have any questions or you
need anything the night of the showcase,

see Adam. He is
our point person.

Uh, venue management specialist.

I think you should be happy
with the title "employee."

And Spencer has hired
his shady friend maceo

to shoot everything going on
this week for a documentary.

And this isn't girls gone wild, so I don't
want to see anybody drunk and naked.

This label needs to
sign a breakout artist.

Some of your
jobs are riding on it.

I won't say who.

That's part of the fun for me.

So get out there
and make me proud.

Or at the very least,
don't embarrass me.

Why is everybody looking at me?

So, about the finalists. Do
you have an early favorite?

'Cause if you do, I can really
clean up in the office pool.

First of all, that's unethical.

And that will be a problem in
the music business because...

Secondly, I have no
inside info to give you,

since I like all 5 acts.

Well, you have to like
4 of them a little less,

so get ready to crush
some dreams, toots.

Can you believe Kai? What does
she mean by "don't embarrass me?"

Jimmy! Terry! My
favorite super-producers!

What's up, y'all?

Listen, um, I thought we were
supposed to hook up together last night.

I went to that club y'all told me
about but I didn't see y'all there.

Uh, something else came up.

Oh. Well, y'all want to
hit that place tonight?

Well, something else is
gonna come up tonight, too.

Well, you gotta tell me how you
hooked up with such hot women.

I want me one of them...
Not yours, but somebody hot.

Ha ha ha ha!

I'll get back to you on that.

Jimmy: Yeah.

Ok, I'll call you.

Yeah, ok. Good, good.

Damn, gonna have to get the
cell phone number changed again.

Yeah.

[Theme music playing]

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