All language subtitles for All In the Family s09e06 Weekend in the Country.eng

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Would you like to inspect the original subtitles? These are the user uploaded subtitles that are being translated: 1 00:00:01,668 --> 00:00:05,115 ? Boy, the way Glenn Miller played ? 2 00:00:05,139 --> 00:00:08,618 ? Songs that made the hit parade ? 3 00:00:08,642 --> 00:00:11,721 ? Guys like us, we had it made ? 4 00:00:11,745 --> 00:00:14,724 ? Those were the days ? 5 00:00:14,748 --> 00:00:18,662 ? And you knew where you were then ? 6 00:00:18,686 --> 00:00:21,932 ? Girls were girls, and men were men ? 7 00:00:21,956 --> 00:00:26,903 ? Mister, we could use a man like Herbert Hoover again ? 8 00:00:26,927 --> 00:00:30,440 ? Didn't need no welfare state ? 9 00:00:30,464 --> 00:00:33,910 ? Everybody pulled his weight ? 10 00:00:33,934 --> 00:00:38,515 ? Gee, our old LaSalle ran great ? 11 00:00:38,539 --> 00:00:44,510 ? Those were the days ? 12 00:00:46,246 --> 00:00:49,392 ? Said the mama fitty, "'fim' if you can" ? 13 00:00:49,416 --> 00:00:53,597 ? And they fam and they fam all over the dam ? 14 00:00:53,621 --> 00:00:57,667 ? Boom boom dittem dattem whattem chu ? 15 00:00:57,691 --> 00:01:00,925 ? Boom boom dittem dattem whattem chu ? 16 00:01:06,266 --> 00:01:07,844 And this. 17 00:01:11,839 --> 00:01:13,605 This here. 18 00:01:19,913 --> 00:01:21,157 Wait a minute! Wait a min... 19 00:01:21,181 --> 00:01:24,227 Edith, what are you doing? I just packed these. 20 00:01:24,251 --> 00:01:26,529 You can't pack 'em like that. 21 00:01:26,553 --> 00:01:29,799 They'll be wrinkled by the time we get there. 22 00:01:29,823 --> 00:01:31,768 We're goin' fishing, Edith. 23 00:01:31,792 --> 00:01:36,539 The fish don't give a damn how I look as long as my worms smell good. 24 00:01:36,563 --> 00:01:41,344 Barney and Blanche'll think I don't take good care of you. 25 00:01:41,368 --> 00:01:44,347 Barney and Blanche, they shouldn't even be going with us. 26 00:01:44,371 --> 00:01:48,118 Why can't we go up to that little weekend cabin alone? 27 00:01:48,142 --> 00:01:53,378 Well, I guess 'cause it's Barney's cabin, and he invited us. 28 00:01:55,482 --> 00:01:58,428 And it's Barney's car and... 29 00:01:58,452 --> 00:02:00,063 All right, Edith. All right! 30 00:02:00,087 --> 00:02:03,888 You made a small point. Don't build it up. 31 00:02:06,794 --> 00:02:09,105 The point I'm tryin' to make is 32 00:02:09,129 --> 00:02:11,875 I can't warm up to Blanche. 33 00:02:11,899 --> 00:02:15,144 I can't forgive her for what she done to my poor pal Barney... 34 00:02:15,168 --> 00:02:17,981 Running off with another guy to Atlantic City. 35 00:02:18,005 --> 00:02:21,751 Archie, Blanche came back to him. 36 00:02:21,775 --> 00:02:24,542 That's what I can't forgive. 37 00:02:25,979 --> 00:02:28,491 She should have stood there in Atlantic City. 38 00:02:28,515 --> 00:02:30,460 Everybody'd be better off. 39 00:02:30,484 --> 00:02:33,829 The state of New Jersey would've had one more fallen woman, 40 00:02:33,853 --> 00:02:37,300 but over in Jersey, they'd never notice that. 41 00:02:37,324 --> 00:02:42,372 God forgives everybody that falls. 42 00:02:42,396 --> 00:02:45,608 I know that, Edith. 43 00:02:45,632 --> 00:02:48,834 But God expects more out of women. 44 00:02:50,671 --> 00:02:55,051 That's why He coined the phrase "fallen woman." 45 00:02:55,075 --> 00:02:58,355 Why do you think you never hear nothing about fallen men? 46 00:02:58,379 --> 00:03:00,256 Answer me that. 47 00:03:00,280 --> 00:03:02,625 That's right. 48 00:03:02,649 --> 00:03:04,661 You can't answer that. 49 00:03:04,685 --> 00:03:11,401 Maybe it's because so many men are falling all the time, 50 00:03:11,425 --> 00:03:14,292 nobody pays no attention. 51 00:03:16,864 --> 00:03:18,774 Edith, if you can't give me 52 00:03:18,798 --> 00:03:20,877 the right answers to my questions, 53 00:03:20,901 --> 00:03:24,168 then let's bring the discussion to a merciful end. 54 00:03:25,239 --> 00:03:27,217 Oh, I'm sorry. 55 00:03:29,309 --> 00:03:30,453 I'm all packed. 56 00:03:30,477 --> 00:03:33,623 Oh, that's good. 57 00:03:33,647 --> 00:03:35,458 Oh, my! You look nice. 58 00:03:35,482 --> 00:03:37,227 What do you mean you're all packed? 59 00:03:37,251 --> 00:03:39,162 When did we decide to take whosis? 60 00:03:39,186 --> 00:03:41,263 - Stephanie. - Whatever. 61 00:03:41,287 --> 00:03:45,167 Stephie's going to stay at the O'Briens' for the weekend. 62 00:03:45,191 --> 00:03:47,670 You got her staying another weekend 63 00:03:47,694 --> 00:03:49,171 with them Catholics there? 64 00:03:49,195 --> 00:03:51,407 They'll drag her off to Mass again. 65 00:03:51,431 --> 00:03:53,810 But I like it. 66 00:03:53,834 --> 00:03:56,512 Can I have some money for the collection plate? 67 00:03:56,536 --> 00:03:57,847 Oh, no dice. 68 00:03:57,871 --> 00:04:00,049 I ain't gonna give you no money 69 00:04:00,073 --> 00:04:01,584 for a Catholic collection plate. 70 00:04:01,608 --> 00:04:03,686 But I'll tell you what I'll do. 71 00:04:03,710 --> 00:04:07,150 I'll give you a buck, you can shoot it on a bingo game. 72 00:04:08,715 --> 00:04:11,060 Archie, that's gambling. 73 00:04:11,084 --> 00:04:14,297 That's one of the main things they do. 74 00:04:14,321 --> 00:04:18,334 She shouldn't be staying with them people anyway. What is the matter? 75 00:04:18,358 --> 00:04:19,802 Ain't there other people in the neighborhood 76 00:04:19,826 --> 00:04:21,337 here with kids? 77 00:04:21,361 --> 00:04:24,440 Hey, the Blooms. They got a kid like you, ain't they? 78 00:04:24,464 --> 00:04:27,576 Yeah, Amy Bloom. She's in my class, too. 79 00:04:27,600 --> 00:04:30,546 She said I can sleep over any time I want to. 80 00:04:30,570 --> 00:04:32,882 Well, there you go. That will be better. 81 00:04:32,906 --> 00:04:35,117 And I can go to Mass with them, too. 82 00:04:35,141 --> 00:04:37,754 Oh, no, no. You can't do that. 83 00:04:37,778 --> 00:04:41,591 No, Mass with the Blooms, no, kiddo. 84 00:04:41,615 --> 00:04:43,426 See, the Blooms are Jewish, 85 00:04:43,450 --> 00:04:46,195 and they go to a temple, 86 00:04:46,219 --> 00:04:48,998 and they have their Sundays on Saturdays. 87 00:04:49,022 --> 00:04:50,366 That's neat! 88 00:04:50,390 --> 00:04:52,502 I can go to temple on Saturday 89 00:04:52,526 --> 00:04:54,738 and church on Sunday. 90 00:04:54,762 --> 00:04:56,505 Holy cow. 91 00:04:56,529 --> 00:05:00,476 Well, then on Monday, you might as well shave the hair off your head 92 00:05:00,500 --> 00:05:03,268 and go beat your tangerine with the "hairy knishes." 93 00:05:05,205 --> 00:05:07,483 Okay, Edith, that's settled now. 94 00:05:07,507 --> 00:05:09,919 The next time, it's gonna be the Blooms 95 00:05:09,943 --> 00:05:12,355 'cause they ain't gonna convert the kid. 96 00:05:12,379 --> 00:05:16,226 You see, one of the good things about the Jews is... 97 00:05:16,250 --> 00:05:17,426 they don't want you. 98 00:05:18,752 --> 00:05:20,096 Oh, there they are! 99 00:05:20,120 --> 00:05:22,799 Stephie, you go down and get in the car. 100 00:05:22,823 --> 00:05:24,167 Okay! 101 00:05:24,191 --> 00:05:26,236 We're gonna drop you at the O'Briens'. 102 00:05:26,260 --> 00:05:28,605 Hiya, Barney! We'll be right down. 103 00:05:28,629 --> 00:05:31,006 Come on, Arch. Hurry up, will you? 104 00:05:31,030 --> 00:05:32,709 Hello, Archie. 105 00:05:32,733 --> 00:05:36,279 Oh, hello there, Blanche. 106 00:05:36,303 --> 00:05:39,249 Archie, hurry up. Here we go. 107 00:05:39,273 --> 00:05:42,518 Hold it, Edith, let's not forget this other big bag here. 108 00:05:42,542 --> 00:05:43,653 Oh, sure. 109 00:05:43,677 --> 00:05:45,288 Here. 110 00:05:45,312 --> 00:05:46,745 I got this here. 111 00:05:50,016 --> 00:05:53,596 Okay, here we go. 1-nothin'. 9! 112 00:05:53,620 --> 00:05:58,401 1, 2, 3, 4, 5, 6, 7, 8, 9. 113 00:05:58,425 --> 00:06:00,836 Oh, you just missed going to jail. 114 00:06:00,860 --> 00:06:02,405 All right, clear the decks there. 115 00:06:02,429 --> 00:06:03,906 All right. Here, I'm shooting now. 116 00:06:03,930 --> 00:06:05,808 Here we go. What did I get? 117 00:06:05,832 --> 00:06:06,942 - 6! - 6 there. 118 00:06:06,966 --> 00:06:10,647 1, 2, 3, 4, 5, 6. 119 00:06:10,671 --> 00:06:12,415 I can count by myself! 120 00:06:12,439 --> 00:06:14,984 That is Virginia Avenue, which I own. 121 00:06:15,008 --> 00:06:16,219 Yeah, okay. 122 00:06:16,243 --> 00:06:17,453 Now it's my turn. 123 00:06:17,477 --> 00:06:18,754 Go ahead, Edith, go ahead. 124 00:06:18,778 --> 00:06:20,055 Oh, come on, Daddy. 125 00:06:20,079 --> 00:06:22,113 Mommy needs a new pair of shoes. 126 00:06:24,351 --> 00:06:27,786 Don't spit on the dice, Edith. 127 00:06:29,489 --> 00:06:30,967 - 7! - 7! 128 00:06:30,991 --> 00:06:34,603 1, 2, 3, 4, 5, 6, 7! 129 00:06:34,627 --> 00:06:38,808 Short Line Railroad, $200. Can I buy it? 130 00:06:38,832 --> 00:06:41,010 - No, you can't buy it. - Why not? 131 00:06:41,034 --> 00:06:43,846 Because you already own it. 132 00:06:43,870 --> 00:06:46,081 Oh, good. 133 00:06:46,105 --> 00:06:48,206 Then I don't have to pay. 134 00:06:49,309 --> 00:06:51,086 - What did you get, Blanche? - 6! 135 00:06:51,110 --> 00:06:54,424 1, 2, 3, 4, 5, 6. 136 00:06:54,448 --> 00:06:57,360 Hey! You took a walk on my Boardwalk. 137 00:06:57,384 --> 00:06:58,728 Happens to have a hotel, 138 00:06:58,752 --> 00:07:01,564 and the rent for that is 2,000 simoleons. 139 00:07:01,588 --> 00:07:06,569 Okay, 16, 1650. Okay, I owe you $350. 140 00:07:06,593 --> 00:07:08,404 - No owings. - No owings, Blanche. 141 00:07:08,428 --> 00:07:10,440 - Strictly cash. - Strictly cash. 142 00:07:10,464 --> 00:07:13,142 - Then lend it to me. - No lendings. 143 00:07:13,166 --> 00:07:16,646 Oh, Barney, you're as cheap with this as you are with real money. 144 00:07:16,670 --> 00:07:20,182 And you're as loose with it as you are with my money. 145 00:07:24,945 --> 00:07:26,689 Well, whose turn is it? 146 00:07:26,713 --> 00:07:28,791 Hey, Blanche, learn the game. 147 00:07:28,815 --> 00:07:31,427 If you need more money, you oughta mortgage some of your houses 148 00:07:31,451 --> 00:07:33,029 or sell your property. 149 00:07:33,053 --> 00:07:35,832 If I do that, I'll lose money, and I won't collect any rents. 150 00:07:35,856 --> 00:07:38,500 He'd lend it to me if he wasn't so cheap. 151 00:07:38,524 --> 00:07:40,336 It's not a matter of cheap. 152 00:07:40,360 --> 00:07:42,004 It's against the rules of the game. 153 00:07:42,028 --> 00:07:43,840 No, it's 'cause you're so cheap. 154 00:07:43,864 --> 00:07:46,542 After all, rules are made to be broken. 155 00:07:46,566 --> 00:07:49,167 Well, you oughta know. 156 00:07:57,310 --> 00:07:59,822 Whose turn is it? 157 00:07:59,846 --> 00:08:02,258 I oughta know what? 158 00:08:02,282 --> 00:08:05,094 Nothing. Come on, let's play the game. 159 00:08:05,118 --> 00:08:06,662 - Yeah, play the game. - Come on! 160 00:08:06,686 --> 00:08:08,263 Okay, Barney, if you're so cheap, 161 00:08:08,287 --> 00:08:10,121 you can have all my property! 162 00:08:15,495 --> 00:08:17,128 This is a shame. 163 00:08:20,066 --> 00:08:21,443 Keep out of it! 164 00:08:21,467 --> 00:08:23,780 This is a private argument. 165 00:08:23,804 --> 00:08:26,482 All right, Blanche, all right, keep it private, then... 166 00:08:26,506 --> 00:08:30,219 You know, between Barney and you and the guy that got to you. 167 00:08:34,147 --> 00:08:35,491 That does it! 168 00:08:35,515 --> 00:08:37,793 You see what you've started, Barney? 169 00:08:37,817 --> 00:08:41,097 You promised you would never mention that exterminator again, 170 00:08:41,121 --> 00:08:44,255 and now you've got fatso talkin' about it. 171 00:08:46,126 --> 00:08:47,803 You hear your friend here? 172 00:08:47,827 --> 00:08:49,438 Do you hear your friend? 173 00:08:49,462 --> 00:08:51,207 - I think we're all tired. - Don't gloss it over. 174 00:08:51,231 --> 00:08:53,309 I think maybe we should go to bed. 175 00:08:53,333 --> 00:08:55,311 Barney's not sleeping with me. 176 00:08:55,335 --> 00:08:56,945 He can find another bed. 177 00:08:56,969 --> 00:08:58,847 Where am I supposed to go? 178 00:08:58,871 --> 00:09:01,606 Well, try your hotel on the Boardwalk! 179 00:09:02,976 --> 00:09:05,788 Now, look here, Blanche. 180 00:09:05,812 --> 00:09:08,791 Stop kidding around. I need a bed. 181 00:09:08,815 --> 00:09:11,827 Maybe you can squeeze in with him and Edith. 182 00:09:11,851 --> 00:09:13,530 Is she kiddin'? 183 00:09:13,554 --> 00:09:16,187 Yeah, she's kiddin'. 184 00:09:18,558 --> 00:09:21,470 Okay, Blanche, is that the way you want it? 185 00:09:21,494 --> 00:09:23,072 That's the way I want it! 186 00:09:23,096 --> 00:09:25,307 Well, wait a minute, hold it! 187 00:09:25,331 --> 00:09:28,144 That ain't the way I want it. 188 00:09:28,168 --> 00:09:31,246 I wouldn't be caught dead in your bed! 189 00:09:31,270 --> 00:09:34,505 If you were, I wouldn't notice the difference. 190 00:09:44,050 --> 00:09:46,884 She wouldn't notice the difference. 191 00:09:47,954 --> 00:09:52,390 Oh, Barney, that was a piece of surgery. 192 00:09:59,833 --> 00:10:02,979 Did you see where he went? 193 00:10:03,003 --> 00:10:06,404 Oh, yeah, our bedroom. 194 00:10:21,521 --> 00:10:23,566 What's with the hat? 195 00:10:23,590 --> 00:10:27,369 It's rainin' over the terlet. 196 00:10:27,393 --> 00:10:28,760 That happens. 197 00:10:30,097 --> 00:10:33,642 You'd think you'd fix that hole in the roof. 198 00:10:33,666 --> 00:10:36,134 Keeps it nice and fresh in there. 199 00:10:38,972 --> 00:10:40,449 Let me tell you something, Barney. 200 00:10:40,473 --> 00:10:43,886 This here is very unnatural. 201 00:10:43,910 --> 00:10:46,889 - Huh? - I mean, you, me... 202 00:10:46,913 --> 00:10:48,224 This is the kind of thing 203 00:10:48,248 --> 00:10:51,081 that sent Anita O'Bryant around the bend. 204 00:10:53,053 --> 00:10:54,830 That's a very good-lookin' woman. 205 00:10:54,854 --> 00:10:57,333 Who cares? 206 00:10:57,357 --> 00:10:59,368 And you're on my side of the bed. 207 00:10:59,392 --> 00:11:02,138 It also happens to be my side of the bed. 208 00:11:02,162 --> 00:11:03,673 I suppose you ain't movin', huh? 209 00:11:03,697 --> 00:11:06,475 - You got it. - Aah, I got no use for you. 210 00:11:06,499 --> 00:11:08,778 If you had any guts at all, you'd go in there 211 00:11:08,802 --> 00:11:11,369 and you'd force yourself on your wife. 212 00:11:12,973 --> 00:11:16,385 All this trouble tonight, it's all Blanche's fault. 213 00:11:16,409 --> 00:11:18,487 I don't want to hear that name again. 214 00:11:18,511 --> 00:11:20,122 Blanche, Blanche, Blanche! 215 00:11:20,146 --> 00:11:21,790 What do you want? 216 00:11:21,814 --> 00:11:23,859 Who's talkin' to you? 217 00:11:23,883 --> 00:11:26,150 It sounded like you, fatso! 218 00:11:34,327 --> 00:11:35,904 Hey, Barney. 219 00:11:35,928 --> 00:11:37,239 Huh? 220 00:11:37,263 --> 00:11:39,875 You know them big country spiders 221 00:11:39,899 --> 00:11:42,933 with the eight hairy legs and the seven red eyes? 222 00:11:44,070 --> 00:11:45,214 Yeah. 223 00:11:45,238 --> 00:11:47,049 You know they're very dangerous. 224 00:11:47,073 --> 00:11:49,518 Well, I just seen one crawl under you. 225 00:11:49,542 --> 00:11:52,254 Aah! Aah! Ohh! 226 00:11:52,278 --> 00:11:53,689 Get him off! Get him off! 227 00:11:53,713 --> 00:11:55,257 Oh, hey, is he on me? 228 00:11:55,281 --> 00:11:57,526 No, no. Barney. It's okay. You're safe. 229 00:11:57,550 --> 00:12:00,496 I just crushed it with my behind. 230 00:12:00,520 --> 00:12:02,998 - Boy, what a low-down trick. - Ha ha ha! 231 00:12:03,022 --> 00:12:04,533 You'd resort to anything, won't you? 232 00:12:04,557 --> 00:12:06,635 Quit your beefing. Quit your beefing. 233 00:12:06,659 --> 00:12:07,870 Don't fight, boys! 234 00:12:07,894 --> 00:12:09,738 Try to be happy together! 235 00:12:09,762 --> 00:12:11,996 - Ah, shut up! - Shut up! 236 00:12:13,766 --> 00:12:16,946 Didn't anybody try to warn you about Blanche 237 00:12:16,970 --> 00:12:18,781 before you got married to her? 238 00:12:18,805 --> 00:12:21,217 Yeah, a couple of people. 239 00:12:21,241 --> 00:12:24,053 But I didn't pay any attention to them 240 00:12:24,077 --> 00:12:26,511 because I knew they didn't like her from the beginning. 241 00:12:27,581 --> 00:12:28,581 Who were they? 242 00:12:29,682 --> 00:12:31,549 Her mother and father. 243 00:12:36,089 --> 00:12:37,733 Ohh. 244 00:12:37,757 --> 00:12:41,237 Oh, Blanche, don't worry. 245 00:12:41,261 --> 00:12:44,706 Everything's going to be all right in the morning. 246 00:12:44,730 --> 00:12:46,142 All right for who? 247 00:12:46,166 --> 00:12:49,011 For you and Barney. 248 00:12:49,035 --> 00:12:51,947 And Archie, if he can ever forget 249 00:12:51,971 --> 00:12:54,605 that he spent the night with a man. 250 00:12:56,042 --> 00:12:57,052 Edith. 251 00:12:57,076 --> 00:13:00,311 Oh, look at your face. 252 00:13:02,048 --> 00:13:04,488 Didn't you ever think of leaving Archie? 253 00:13:05,785 --> 00:13:07,997 Oh, Blanche. 254 00:13:08,021 --> 00:13:10,066 Well, didn't you? Didn't you? 255 00:13:10,090 --> 00:13:11,767 Come on, you can tell me. 256 00:13:11,791 --> 00:13:14,492 Well, once. 257 00:13:15,895 --> 00:13:20,164 I thought he was having an affair with another woman. 258 00:13:21,267 --> 00:13:22,411 Was he? 259 00:13:22,435 --> 00:13:26,482 Oh, Archie could never do that. 260 00:13:26,506 --> 00:13:29,106 I didn't think he could. 261 00:13:32,845 --> 00:13:34,690 But you, Edith. 262 00:13:34,714 --> 00:13:38,027 Didn't you ever have an affair with another man? 263 00:13:38,051 --> 00:13:40,529 Oh, Blanche. 264 00:13:40,553 --> 00:13:43,299 Come on, tell me. Come on. Come on. 265 00:13:43,323 --> 00:13:44,588 Come on, tell me. 266 00:13:47,460 --> 00:13:49,571 Well... 267 00:13:49,595 --> 00:13:51,840 why would I want another man 268 00:13:51,864 --> 00:13:53,797 when I got Archie? 269 00:13:54,934 --> 00:13:56,500 That's why. 270 00:14:00,539 --> 00:14:04,208 Archie's the only man for me. 271 00:14:05,378 --> 00:14:07,738 He can't be much of a lover. 272 00:14:11,084 --> 00:14:14,230 Blanche, I'd rather not talk about it. 273 00:14:14,254 --> 00:14:16,587 Oh, that bad, huh? 274 00:14:18,124 --> 00:14:20,436 No, I didn't say that. 275 00:14:20,460 --> 00:14:23,272 Just between us, you know? 276 00:14:23,296 --> 00:14:26,308 Two old friends, girl talk. Let's be honest. 277 00:14:26,332 --> 00:14:29,578 Now, on a scale of 1 to 10, 278 00:14:29,602 --> 00:14:30,979 as a lover, 279 00:14:31,003 --> 00:14:34,984 I would put Barney at about 1 1/2. 280 00:14:35,008 --> 00:14:37,208 Oh... 281 00:14:38,378 --> 00:14:40,511 Oh! 282 00:14:43,083 --> 00:14:44,460 Ho ho ho. 283 00:14:44,484 --> 00:14:46,629 Where would you put Archie? 284 00:14:46,653 --> 00:14:48,363 Oh. 285 00:14:51,290 --> 00:14:54,670 I never heard of a scale like that. 286 00:14:54,694 --> 00:14:57,740 Call it The Bedroom Scale. 287 00:15:01,934 --> 00:15:04,747 Put Archie on it! 288 00:15:04,771 --> 00:15:08,851 I can't even get Archie on the bathroom scale. 289 00:15:17,617 --> 00:15:19,461 You hear that, Barney? 290 00:15:19,485 --> 00:15:21,018 They're laughin' at you. 291 00:15:23,989 --> 00:15:25,367 Oh, yeah? 292 00:15:25,391 --> 00:15:27,871 How do you know they ain't laughin' at you? 293 00:15:32,598 --> 00:15:34,476 Well... 294 00:15:34,500 --> 00:15:36,099 Well, I'll find out. 295 00:15:39,905 --> 00:15:41,806 Oh, my God. 296 00:15:43,142 --> 00:15:45,221 You know, Blanche, with that face, 297 00:15:45,245 --> 00:15:46,889 you could stand outside the cabin 298 00:15:46,913 --> 00:15:49,158 and keep the bears away. 299 00:15:49,182 --> 00:15:52,894 Archie, if you was the last man on Earth 300 00:15:52,918 --> 00:15:55,063 and I was the last woman, 301 00:15:55,087 --> 00:15:57,521 I'd start lookin' at bears. 302 00:16:00,326 --> 00:16:02,926 Wait a minute, you can't escape me in the terlet. 303 00:16:03,929 --> 00:16:05,674 Hey, don't do nothing yet. 304 00:16:05,698 --> 00:16:07,710 Get out of here! 305 00:16:07,734 --> 00:16:09,812 If I was the last man on Earth 306 00:16:09,836 --> 00:16:11,780 and you was the last woman, 307 00:16:11,804 --> 00:16:14,438 I would go to bed with a bush. 308 00:16:18,010 --> 00:16:20,289 Archie, is something wrong? 309 00:16:20,313 --> 00:16:22,158 The only thing wrong is there's no lock on that door 310 00:16:22,182 --> 00:16:24,226 to lock her the hell out of here. 311 00:16:24,250 --> 00:16:25,227 Look out, Edith. 312 00:16:25,251 --> 00:16:28,263 What are you doin'? 313 00:16:28,287 --> 00:16:30,265 I'm gettin' in bed with my wife, 314 00:16:30,289 --> 00:16:33,335 the same as I done for the last 28 years. 315 00:16:33,359 --> 00:16:34,336 29! 316 00:16:34,360 --> 00:16:35,938 Yeah, whatever. 317 00:16:35,962 --> 00:16:37,039 Ahh. 318 00:16:37,063 --> 00:16:38,941 Of course it's not only my habit, 319 00:16:38,965 --> 00:16:43,812 but it happens to be a husband's con-jungle right. 320 00:16:43,836 --> 00:16:47,616 And a wife's convivial obligation. 321 00:16:47,640 --> 00:16:52,221 But Blanche is comin' right back. 322 00:16:52,245 --> 00:16:56,559 Let her go and get into bed with her husband there, 323 00:16:56,583 --> 00:16:59,528 which is a habit that she oughta get back into. 324 00:16:59,552 --> 00:17:02,286 And I hope the two of them punch each other out. 325 00:17:04,390 --> 00:17:07,570 Don't be looking at me with the two eyes. 326 00:17:07,594 --> 00:17:09,672 Close them eyes. 327 00:17:09,696 --> 00:17:12,341 And you go to sleep. 328 00:17:12,365 --> 00:17:13,809 The two of us, 329 00:17:13,833 --> 00:17:15,444 we make out, if she comes back, 330 00:17:15,468 --> 00:17:17,313 like we're dead to the world. 331 00:17:17,337 --> 00:17:20,771 Now, come on, Edith, lights out. 332 00:17:24,944 --> 00:17:28,312 Brrr! Am I cold! 333 00:17:38,224 --> 00:17:39,457 Edith. 334 00:17:46,198 --> 00:17:48,399 Hmm... 335 00:17:51,504 --> 00:17:53,671 Give me a little room, will you? 336 00:17:56,943 --> 00:18:02,413 Blanche, I think you'd better turn on the light. 337 00:18:04,350 --> 00:18:08,118 Edith, this doesn't feel like you. 338 00:18:12,459 --> 00:18:14,992 That's because you're feelin' me. 339 00:18:24,336 --> 00:18:26,948 Don't it strike you funny, Blanche, 340 00:18:26,972 --> 00:18:29,951 that the only guy who could ever get rid of you 341 00:18:29,975 --> 00:18:31,776 was an exterminator? 342 00:18:33,245 --> 00:18:37,448 Well, he'd sure know how to handle a louse like you. 343 00:18:39,218 --> 00:18:45,801 Archie, I think you'd better go back to bed with Barney. 344 00:18:45,825 --> 00:18:49,171 No, let her go back to bed with Barney! 345 00:18:49,195 --> 00:18:50,939 You go back to bed with Barney! 346 00:18:50,963 --> 00:18:52,675 This is my bed! 347 00:18:52,699 --> 00:18:54,276 Well, let me tell you something. 348 00:18:54,300 --> 00:18:57,179 Whilst my wife is in this bed, this is my bed. 349 00:18:57,203 --> 00:18:59,581 And I will not get out of this bed 350 00:18:59,605 --> 00:19:01,483 until my wife gets out of it. 351 00:19:01,507 --> 00:19:04,686 Then I'll get out of it. 352 00:19:04,710 --> 00:19:07,556 And leave me in it with Archie? 353 00:19:07,580 --> 00:19:09,325 Oh! 354 00:19:09,349 --> 00:19:12,727 Oh, no. 355 00:19:12,751 --> 00:19:16,298 Ahh, Blanche, maybe Barney took you back and forgive you, 356 00:19:16,322 --> 00:19:18,467 but not the world and not me. 357 00:19:18,491 --> 00:19:21,670 Archie Bunker speaks for the world, I suppose. 358 00:19:21,694 --> 00:19:24,739 When the world is doin' right, I speak for it. 359 00:19:24,763 --> 00:19:27,264 When it's doin' wrong, I speak to it. 360 00:19:28,901 --> 00:19:30,467 What a dummy. 361 00:19:32,538 --> 00:19:34,416 I'll tell you something else, Blanche. 362 00:19:34,440 --> 00:19:36,218 At this point in time, 363 00:19:36,242 --> 00:19:40,422 the world and me is very disappointed in you. 364 00:19:40,446 --> 00:19:41,924 We are very sorry 365 00:19:41,948 --> 00:19:45,582 that you have turned into a "pyronymphiac." 366 00:19:48,654 --> 00:19:52,101 Archie, be nice. 367 00:19:52,125 --> 00:19:54,670 Edith, this is as nice as I get. 368 00:19:54,694 --> 00:19:56,293 What the hell is go... 369 00:20:02,735 --> 00:20:05,214 Well, excuse me! 370 00:20:05,238 --> 00:20:07,449 This is all your fault, Barney. 371 00:20:07,473 --> 00:20:09,151 I didn't want to fight up here. 372 00:20:09,175 --> 00:20:11,053 It ain't what it looks like! 373 00:20:11,077 --> 00:20:12,955 It was an accident! 374 00:20:12,979 --> 00:20:14,990 See, Blanche went into the bathroom 375 00:20:15,014 --> 00:20:17,760 to... to... to get ready, you know. 376 00:20:17,784 --> 00:20:20,863 And then she jumped into bed with Archie. 377 00:20:20,887 --> 00:20:24,466 I mean, she thought Archie was me. 378 00:20:24,490 --> 00:20:25,867 Get out of here. 379 00:20:25,891 --> 00:20:29,671 If you was a gentleman, you wouldn't be in bed with me. 380 00:20:29,695 --> 00:20:32,507 You get out of here. 381 00:20:32,531 --> 00:20:33,875 If you was a lady, 382 00:20:33,899 --> 00:20:36,500 you certainly wouldn't be in bed with me. 383 00:20:38,571 --> 00:20:42,684 This is my bed, and I am gonna stay in it! 384 00:20:42,708 --> 00:20:46,188 Okay, Blanche, any woman who insists 385 00:20:46,212 --> 00:20:48,490 on remaining in bed with Archie Bunker 386 00:20:48,514 --> 00:20:50,914 has got to face the consequentials. 387 00:20:53,552 --> 00:20:57,566 I can't resist it, Blanche! I can't resist it, Blanche! 388 00:20:57,590 --> 00:20:59,435 What happened? 389 00:20:59,459 --> 00:21:01,659 Your best friend tried to attack me! 390 00:21:02,962 --> 00:21:04,595 A likely story! 391 00:21:05,764 --> 00:21:08,210 Well, you heard him, it's a likely story! 392 00:21:08,234 --> 00:21:10,012 What's the use? 393 00:21:10,036 --> 00:21:12,647 You don't believe anything I say. 394 00:21:12,671 --> 00:21:15,117 Oh, Blanche, listen to me. 395 00:21:15,141 --> 00:21:17,386 Everybody, this whole thing started 396 00:21:17,410 --> 00:21:20,356 because of a little fight over Monopoly money. 397 00:21:20,380 --> 00:21:21,890 Oh, no, no, no, Edith. 398 00:21:21,914 --> 00:21:23,458 It goes way deeper than that. 399 00:21:23,482 --> 00:21:25,327 Archie's right. 400 00:21:25,351 --> 00:21:27,762 It isn't just Monopoly money. 401 00:21:27,786 --> 00:21:29,097 I made a mistake, 402 00:21:29,121 --> 00:21:32,100 and now everybody reminds me of it... 403 00:21:32,124 --> 00:21:34,436 Barney's family, my family, 404 00:21:34,460 --> 00:21:37,105 the whole neighborhood. 405 00:21:37,129 --> 00:21:39,507 Maybe Archie's right. 406 00:21:39,531 --> 00:21:42,177 Maybe he is speaking for the whole world. 407 00:21:42,201 --> 00:21:45,547 Oh, well, there's no maybes about that, Blanche. 408 00:21:45,571 --> 00:21:48,016 Well, what does everybody want me to do? 409 00:21:48,040 --> 00:21:49,951 Disappear? Put my head in the oven? 410 00:21:49,975 --> 00:21:52,021 Oh, no, don't do that. 411 00:21:52,045 --> 00:21:55,958 No, that would be a sin, but you could disappear. 412 00:21:55,982 --> 00:21:57,725 Knock it off, will you, Arch? 413 00:21:57,749 --> 00:22:00,262 I'm trying to be your pal, I'm on your side. 414 00:22:00,286 --> 00:22:02,097 No, wait a minute. 415 00:22:02,121 --> 00:22:04,566 Listen to me, Blanche. 416 00:22:04,590 --> 00:22:07,136 All that's really important 417 00:22:07,160 --> 00:22:11,140 is how you and Barney feel about each other. 418 00:22:11,164 --> 00:22:14,643 It's like what my Aunt Frida from Freeport 419 00:22:14,667 --> 00:22:16,011 always used to say... 420 00:22:16,035 --> 00:22:19,547 "You can't run away from your own head, 421 00:22:19,571 --> 00:22:22,350 so you might as well make friends with it." 422 00:22:22,374 --> 00:22:26,155 So let's everybody make friends 423 00:22:26,179 --> 00:22:30,192 with their own heads and shake hands. 424 00:22:30,216 --> 00:22:31,994 Come on, Archie! 425 00:22:32,018 --> 00:22:33,162 All right, Edith. 426 00:22:33,186 --> 00:22:36,231 No, no, shake hands with Blanche. 427 00:22:36,255 --> 00:22:37,733 Why should I shake hands with her? 428 00:22:37,757 --> 00:22:40,135 She should be shaking hands with him and him with her. 429 00:22:40,159 --> 00:22:42,471 After all, this is the guy that she done wrong. 430 00:22:42,495 --> 00:22:44,005 Archie Bunker! 431 00:22:44,029 --> 00:22:46,375 Will you stay out of this? 432 00:22:46,399 --> 00:22:47,743 Talkin' the truth. 433 00:22:47,767 --> 00:22:50,945 Blanche, honey, listen to me. Edith is right. 434 00:22:50,969 --> 00:22:53,148 The only thing that's really important 435 00:22:53,172 --> 00:22:55,784 is how we feel about each other. 436 00:22:55,808 --> 00:22:58,186 And I think you're beautiful. 437 00:22:58,210 --> 00:23:01,045 I think you're beautiful, too, Barney. 438 00:23:03,015 --> 00:23:05,393 Oh. 439 00:23:05,417 --> 00:23:09,264 Archie, ain't that nice? 440 00:23:09,288 --> 00:23:11,066 I think it's stupid. 441 00:23:11,090 --> 00:23:12,401 Come on, honey. 442 00:23:12,425 --> 00:23:15,337 We'll grab a few Z's, huh? 443 00:23:15,361 --> 00:23:16,638 Good night! 444 00:23:16,662 --> 00:23:18,740 Wait a minute, wait a minute! Hold it, Barney! 445 00:23:18,764 --> 00:23:20,475 Where the hell you think you're going? 446 00:23:20,499 --> 00:23:21,743 To bed. 447 00:23:21,767 --> 00:23:23,711 To bed there? Well, I mean... 448 00:23:23,735 --> 00:23:26,014 But daybreak is breaking over here... 449 00:23:26,038 --> 00:23:27,482 At least out there. 450 00:23:27,506 --> 00:23:29,785 That's why it's time to go to bed. 451 00:23:29,809 --> 00:23:31,553 No, it's time to get into the boat 452 00:23:31,577 --> 00:23:33,455 and get out on the lake to fish, fish, fish! 453 00:23:33,479 --> 00:23:35,958 We came up here to fish. The fish are jumpin' there. 454 00:23:35,982 --> 00:23:38,460 Why are you lookin' at me as if I was a nut? 455 00:23:38,484 --> 00:23:41,196 'Cause that's the way you look. 456 00:23:41,220 --> 00:23:43,598 Don't look at me no more, huh? 457 00:23:43,622 --> 00:23:46,468 Just go into the kitchen there, will you, please? 458 00:23:46,492 --> 00:23:48,002 And make coffee and make toast. 459 00:23:48,026 --> 00:23:50,038 Blanche, will you go into the kitchen there 460 00:23:50,062 --> 00:23:52,073 and make the eggs and make bacon, huh? 461 00:23:52,097 --> 00:23:54,676 Barney, don't stand there. Make the... make the beds. 462 00:23:54,700 --> 00:23:56,745 And what are you gonna make? 463 00:23:56,769 --> 00:23:57,813 I... 464 00:23:57,837 --> 00:23:59,381 am gonna make... 465 00:23:59,405 --> 00:24:01,872 believe that none of this ever happened. 466 00:24:42,882 --> 00:24:45,494 All in the Family was played to a studio audience 467 00:24:45,518 --> 00:24:47,217 for live responses. 468 00:24:47,267 --> 00:24:51,817 Repair and Synchronization by Easy Subtitles Synchronizer 1.0.0.0 33280

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