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1
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? BOY, THE WAY
GLENN MILLER PLAYED ?
2
00:00:05,973 --> 00:00:09,508
? SONGS THAT MADE
THE HIT PARADE ?
3
00:00:09,576 --> 00:00:13,212
? GUYS LIKE US, WE HAD IT MADE ?
4
00:00:13,280 --> 00:00:16,481
? THOSE WERE THE DAYS ?
5
00:00:16,550 --> 00:00:20,185
? AND YOU KNEW
WHERE YOU WERE THEN ?
6
00:00:20,254 --> 00:00:24,055
? GIRLS WERE GIRLS
AND MEN WERE MEN ?
7
00:00:24,124 --> 00:00:26,324
? MISTER, WE COULD USE A MAN ?
8
00:00:26,393 --> 00:00:30,395
? LIKE HERBERT HOOVER AGAIN ?
9
00:00:30,464 --> 00:00:33,431
? DIDN'T NEED NO
WELFARE STATES ?
10
00:00:33,500 --> 00:00:36,702
? EVERYBODY PULLED HIS WEIGHT ?
11
00:00:36,770 --> 00:00:41,039
? GEE, OUR OLD
LASALLE RAN GREAT ?
12
00:00:41,108 --> 00:00:42,274
? THOSE WERE ?
13
00:00:42,342 --> 00:00:46,478
? THE DAYS ?
14
00:00:48,000 --> 00:00:54,074
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15
00:00:58,025 --> 00:00:59,545
HI, MA. HMM.
16
00:00:59,593 --> 00:01:03,295
WHERE'S MICHAEL? OH, HE'S
UPSTAIRS, TRYING TO FIX THE TOILET
17
00:01:04,064 --> 00:01:06,198
OH.
18
00:01:06,267 --> 00:01:10,702
WHAT'S WRONG WITH IT? WELL,
IT KEEPS MAKIN' FUNNY NOISES.
19
00:01:10,771 --> 00:01:14,131
MAYBE THE LITTLE MAN IN THE
ROW BOAT GOT AN OUTBOARD MOTOR.
20
00:01:15,709 --> 00:01:18,076
OH, NO.
21
00:01:18,145 --> 00:01:21,113
SEE, THE WATER GOES DOWN
22
00:01:21,181 --> 00:01:22,680
AND IT KEEPS RUNNIN'.
23
00:01:22,750 --> 00:01:25,316
AND TO FILL THE TANK,
YOU GOTTA REACH IN
24
00:01:25,385 --> 00:01:29,020
AND PULL UP THAT BIG
METAL BALL AND HOLD IT.
25
00:01:29,089 --> 00:01:32,157
BUT NOBODY'S GOT
TIME TO HOLD IT ALL DAY.
26
00:01:33,393 --> 00:01:35,738
MA, WHY DIDN'T YOU
CALL THE PLUMBER?
27
00:01:35,762 --> 00:01:40,032
OH, NO, ARCHIE SAYS PLUMBERS
CHARGE MORE THAN DOCTORS
28
00:01:40,100 --> 00:01:42,901
FOR HOUSE CALLS. $18.
29
00:01:42,969 --> 00:01:44,802
WELL, THEN, LET'S CALL A DOCTOR.
30
00:01:44,871 --> 00:01:47,338
OH.
31
00:01:47,407 --> 00:01:49,707
OH, MIKE, DID YOU FIX IT?
32
00:01:49,777 --> 00:01:52,244
WELL, I TIED UP THE METAL
BALL SO THAT IT JUST FLOATS.
33
00:01:52,313 --> 00:01:54,746
BUT NOW YOU GOT TO UNTIE IT,
EVERY TIME YOU WANNA FLUSH IT.
34
00:01:57,384 --> 00:01:59,051
HELLO? AND HERE I AM.
35
00:01:59,119 --> 00:02:01,198
EVERYTHING'S OK. THERE
AIN'T NOTHIN' TO WORRY ABOUT.
36
00:02:01,222 --> 00:02:03,266
EVERYTHING'S OK. THERE
AIN'T NOTHIN' TO WORRY ABOUT.
37
00:02:03,290 --> 00:02:04,922
ARCHIE! WHAT'S THE MATTER?
38
00:02:04,991 --> 00:02:06,831
OH, EDITH, EDITH,
EDITH. NONE OF THEM
39
00:02:06,893 --> 00:02:09,005
"HOW WAS YOUR DAY'S" OR
"WHOOP-DEE-WOO'S" TONIGHT.
40
00:02:09,029 --> 00:02:11,074
EDITH, HERE. TAKE MY COAT.
41
00:02:11,098 --> 00:02:14,344
THIS AIN'T ONE OF YOUR SLIGHT-HEARTED
OCCASIONS HERE THIS EVENING.
42
00:02:14,368 --> 00:02:16,808
COME HERE TO ME, MY LITTLE GIRL.
43
00:02:17,137 --> 00:02:18,403
GET OVER HERE.
44
00:02:22,276 --> 00:02:25,343
YOU KNOW, YOU... YOU NEARLY
LOST YOUR DADDY TODAY.
45
00:02:25,412 --> 00:02:26,811
WHY? WHAT HAPPENED?
46
00:02:26,880 --> 00:02:29,013
IT'S ALL RIGHT,
GLORIA, HE'S JUST FINE...
47
00:02:29,082 --> 00:02:33,251
WHAT DO YOU MEAN "FINE"? I
AIN'T FINE, I'M ANYTHING BUT FINE.
48
00:02:33,320 --> 00:02:34,931
TELL 'EM WHAT HAPPENED
THERE, STRETCH.
49
00:02:34,955 --> 00:02:36,833
UH, HE NEARLY GOT
HIMSELF KILLED AT WORK.
50
00:02:36,857 --> 00:02:38,234
AND THAT'S WHAT YOU CALL FINE?
51
00:02:38,258 --> 00:02:40,258
I NEARLY GOT MYSELF
KILLED TODAY AT WORK.
52
00:02:40,327 --> 00:02:42,639
- OH, DADDY, ARE YOU HURT?
- ARCHIE, ARE YOU OK?
53
00:02:42,663 --> 00:02:44,641
ARCHIE, WHAT
HAPPENED? YOU KNOW...
54
00:02:44,665 --> 00:02:47,398
A WHOLE CRATE OF MACHINE PARTS
55
00:02:47,467 --> 00:02:49,835
FELL OFF THE CRANE AND
MISSED HIM BY THAT MUCH.
56
00:02:49,903 --> 00:02:53,272
GET OUTTA HERE. IT MISSED
ME BY THIS HERE MUCH.
57
00:02:53,340 --> 00:02:55,907
YEAH, ANOTHER INCH, WE COULD'VE
MAILED HIM HOME IN AN ENVELOPE.
58
00:02:57,878 --> 00:02:59,277
WHERE'S MY LUNCH BOX?
59
00:02:59,346 --> 00:03:01,346
BRING THE LUNCH HERE,
LET ME SHOW THEM THIS.
60
00:03:01,414 --> 00:03:04,216
THIS IS MY LUNCH
BOX, I BROUGHT HOME.
61
00:03:06,920 --> 00:03:10,360
HOW WOULD YOU LIKE IT IF I WALKED
IN THE DOOR LOOKIN' LIKE THAT?
62
00:03:11,658 --> 00:03:14,159
OH, ARCHIE!
63
00:03:14,228 --> 00:03:16,395
ARE YOU SURE YOU AIN'T HURT?
64
00:03:16,463 --> 00:03:17,829
OH, NOT A SCRATCH.
65
00:03:17,897 --> 00:03:20,210
ME AND IRENE JUST RODE HIM HOME
IN THE SUBWAY 'CAUSE OLD ARCH
66
00:03:20,234 --> 00:03:21,874
WAS LIKE THIS... YOU KNOW?
67
00:03:21,935 --> 00:03:24,769
YEAH, AND THAT WAS
AFTER HE'D CALMED DOWN.
68
00:03:24,838 --> 00:03:26,949
THANK YOU, BOTH OF YOU,
FOR BRINGIN' HIM HOME.
69
00:03:26,973 --> 00:03:30,408
HEY, HEY, STRETCH COME WAY OUT
OF HIS WAY TO COME HOME WITH ME.
70
00:03:30,477 --> 00:03:32,777
THEY... THEY DON'T MAKE
GUYS LIKE HIM NO MORE.
71
00:03:32,846 --> 00:03:34,546
NO, NOT SINCE MY FATHER DIED.
72
00:03:38,686 --> 00:03:40,052
LAUGH, WILL YA?
73
00:03:44,624 --> 00:03:48,459
OH, ARCHIE, I'M SO
GLAD YOU'RE SAFE.
74
00:03:48,528 --> 00:03:51,129
IT'S A MIRACLE, EDITH,
THAT I WASN'T KILLED.
75
00:03:51,198 --> 00:03:53,332
YEAH, IT SURE WAS.
AND LUCKY FOR ME, TOO.
76
00:03:53,400 --> 00:03:54,680
'CAUSE I AIN'T GOT A BLACK SUIT.
77
00:03:58,171 --> 00:04:00,772
WHO... WHO SAID THAT?
78
00:04:00,841 --> 00:04:03,408
- I THINK WE OUGHT TO GO.
- YEAH, SEE YOU LATER.
79
00:04:03,476 --> 00:04:05,955
WELL, LISTEN, YOUSE TWO, I
MEAN, THANK YOU VERY, VERY MUCH.
80
00:04:05,979 --> 00:04:09,481
IN OTHER WORDS, I MEAN TO SAY, WHAT I
MEAN TO SAY IS, GOD BLESS THE TWO OF YOUSE.
81
00:04:09,550 --> 00:04:11,828
WE'LL SEE YOU, ARCH. I'LL SEE
YOU IN THE MORNING, ARCHIE.
82
00:04:11,852 --> 00:04:13,784
BYE, EVERYBODY BYE.
83
00:04:13,853 --> 00:04:17,889
ARCHIE, DO YOU FEEL UP
TO TALKIN' ABOUT IT NOW?
84
00:04:17,957 --> 00:04:19,802
WHAT DO YOU MEAN,
UP TO TALKIN' ABOUT IT?
85
00:04:19,826 --> 00:04:22,260
I WAS JUST GETTIN'
DOWN TO TALKIN' ABOUT IT.
86
00:04:22,328 --> 00:04:24,541
THIS HAPPENED ON THE LAST
COFFEE BREAK OF THE DAY.
87
00:04:24,565 --> 00:04:27,410
FOR ME, IT COULD'VE BEEN THE LAST
COFFEE BREAK OF ALL TIME, EDITH.
88
00:04:27,434 --> 00:04:28,767
I'M SITTIN' THERE
89
00:04:28,835 --> 00:04:31,781
WHEN DUTCH KRIEGER UPS TO ME
AND OFFERS ME A HARD BOILED EGG
90
00:04:31,805 --> 00:04:33,672
LEFT OVER FROM HIS
LUNCH, YOU KNOW?
91
00:04:33,740 --> 00:04:35,941
SO, I TAKE THEM EGG,
YOU KNOW, I... I PEEL IT OFF
92
00:04:36,009 --> 00:04:39,277
AND I'M JUST ABOUT TO EAT
IT, WHEN ALL OF A SUDDEN
93
00:04:39,345 --> 00:04:42,881
A VOICE, YOU KNOW, COME LIKE
OUT OF NOWHERE INTO MY HEAD.
94
00:04:42,950 --> 00:04:44,816
AND IT SAYS TO ME:
95
00:04:44,885 --> 00:04:46,618
"YOU NEED SALT ON THAT EGG."
96
00:04:49,456 --> 00:04:51,456
YOUR VOICE WAS RIGHT.
97
00:04:51,524 --> 00:04:55,860
BECAUSE A HARDBOILED EGG ALWAYS
TASTES BETTER WITH SALT ON IT.
98
00:04:57,731 --> 00:05:00,632
IF YOU WANT, STARTIN'
TOMORROW, I'LL PUT A HARD BOILED...
99
00:05:00,701 --> 00:05:04,341
WOULD YOU SHUT UP AND
LET ME FINISH THE STORY HERE?
100
00:05:05,405 --> 00:05:08,706
SO, I TAKE A COUPLE OF STEPS
OVER TO DUTCH TO GET THE SALT,
101
00:05:08,775 --> 00:05:10,675
AND I HERE A WHOOSH BEHIND ME.
102
00:05:10,744 --> 00:05:14,746
I TURN AROUND AND BAM, THIS CRATE
COMES RIGHT DOWN OFF OF A CRANE,
103
00:05:14,815 --> 00:05:17,315
DOWN ON A LOADIN' PLATFORM
RIGHT WHERE I WAS SITTIN'.
104
00:05:17,383 --> 00:05:19,984
NOW CAN YOU IMAGINE IF THAT
THING HAD HIT ME ON TOP OF MY HEAD?
105
00:05:20,053 --> 00:05:22,587
WASN'T YOU WEARING
YOUR SAFETY HAT?
106
00:05:29,563 --> 00:05:31,996
THE CRATE WEIGHED ONE TON.
107
00:05:33,099 --> 00:05:34,299
IF I HADN'T HAVE MOVED,
108
00:05:34,367 --> 00:05:37,302
MY FEET WOULD'VE BEEN
WEARING MY SAFETY HAT.
109
00:05:38,305 --> 00:05:40,338
GEE, ARCH, YOU SURE WERE LUCKY.
110
00:05:40,407 --> 00:05:42,307
AW, COME ON, IT WASN'T LUCK.
111
00:05:42,376 --> 00:05:44,209
IT WASN'T LUCK, IT WAS GOD.
112
00:05:44,844 --> 00:05:46,411
WHO?
113
00:05:46,480 --> 00:05:49,381
YOU HEARD ME, IT WAS GOD'S VOICE
114
00:05:49,450 --> 00:05:51,649
THAT WARNED ME
AND SAVED ME THERE.
115
00:05:51,718 --> 00:05:54,553
UH-UH, HOW DID YOU
KNOW IT WAS GOD'S VOICE?
116
00:05:54,621 --> 00:05:57,322
BECAUSE, BUDDY, GOD
HAS ONE OF THEM VOICES
117
00:05:57,391 --> 00:05:59,691
THAT YOU NEVER EVER FORGET.
118
00:06:01,795 --> 00:06:03,955
YOU KNOW, LIKE BING CROSBY.
119
00:06:05,999 --> 00:06:10,134
OH, MY, ARCHIE.
120
00:06:10,203 --> 00:06:13,605
IT'S LIKE A MIRACLE
YOU WASN'T KILLED.
121
00:06:13,674 --> 00:06:15,384
WHAT DO YOU MEAN,
LIKE A MIRACLE?
122
00:06:15,408 --> 00:06:17,219
I'M TELLING YA,
IT WAS A MIRACLE.
123
00:06:17,243 --> 00:06:20,011
AW, COME ON ARCHIE, IT WAS LUCK,
THERE'S NO SUCH THING AS MIRACLES.
124
00:06:20,079 --> 00:06:22,447
AH? WHAT THE HELL DO YOU KNOW?
125
00:06:22,516 --> 00:06:24,960
THERE'S MILLIONS AND BILLIONS
OF PEOPLE THAT READ THE BIBLE.
126
00:06:24,984 --> 00:06:28,085
THERE ARE PLENTY OF MIRACLES.
MIRACLES RUN ALL THROUGH THE BIBLE THERE.
127
00:06:28,155 --> 00:06:30,555
WHAT ABOUT YOUR STORY OF
NOAH AND THE WHALE THERE?
128
00:06:30,624 --> 00:06:32,123
WHAT ABOUT SAMSON?
129
00:06:32,192 --> 00:06:34,025
HE TAKES A JAWBONE
OUT OF THE GRASS
130
00:06:34,093 --> 00:06:36,594
AND HE KILLS THE WHOLE
ARMY OF THE PHILIPPINES.
131
00:06:41,301 --> 00:06:43,768
WHAT'S IMPORTANT
IS YOU'RE ALIVE!
132
00:06:43,837 --> 00:06:46,171
YEAH, ALL RIGHT, EDITH,
ALL RIGHT, ALL RIGHT!
133
00:06:46,240 --> 00:06:47,783
I'M ALIVE AND I'M HUNGRY,
134
00:06:47,807 --> 00:06:50,153
SO, SHAKE A LEG AND GET SUPPER
ON THE TABLE THERE, WILL YA?
135
00:06:50,177 --> 00:06:51,576
OH, I'LL... I'LL HELP YOU, MA.
136
00:06:51,645 --> 00:06:52,977
OH, YES, THANK YOU.
137
00:06:53,046 --> 00:06:57,949
OH, MY, I'M LUCKY I HAVE
YOU TO SHAKE A LEG FOR.
138
00:06:59,987 --> 00:07:01,786
LOOK AT THIS.
139
00:07:01,855 --> 00:07:05,590
THIS COULD BE ME I'M
HOLDING IN MY HAND HERE.
140
00:07:05,658 --> 00:07:08,927
WELL, I'M TELLIN' YOU, IT
MAKES A GUY STOP AND THINK
141
00:07:08,996 --> 00:07:11,462
WHEN HE'S JUST BEEN
THE VICTIM OF A MIRACLE.
142
00:07:11,531 --> 00:07:13,109
COME ON, YOU JUST
HAD A CLOSE CALL.
143
00:07:13,133 --> 00:07:15,144
YOU DON'T HAVE TO PRETEND
TO GET RELIGIOUS ABOUT IT.
144
00:07:15,168 --> 00:07:17,880
HEY, HEY, THERE. I DON'T PRETEND
NOTHING WHEN IT COMES TO RELIGION.
145
00:07:17,904 --> 00:07:19,704
I'LL SHOW YOU HOW
MUCH I PRETEND.
146
00:07:19,773 --> 00:07:21,772
HEY, EDITH, GET
OUT HERE, WILL YA?
147
00:07:21,841 --> 00:07:24,642
HERE, ARCHIE,
DINNER'S ALMOST READY.
148
00:07:24,711 --> 00:07:27,390
YEAH, WELL, HOLD DINNER FOR A
MINUTE. NOW YOU GOT THE NUMBER,
149
00:07:27,414 --> 00:07:30,314
I WANT YOU TO GET ON THE PHONE
AND GET AHOLD OF REVEREND FLETCHER.
150
00:07:30,383 --> 00:07:32,383
FELCHER. WHATEVER.
151
00:07:32,452 --> 00:07:35,119
GET HIM ON THE BLOWER THERE, EH?
152
00:07:35,188 --> 00:07:37,388
WHAT DO YOU WANNA
TALK TO HIM FOR?
153
00:07:37,458 --> 00:07:39,458
I GOT A LITTLE SURPRISE FOR HIM.
154
00:07:39,526 --> 00:07:42,193
AND A SURPRISE FOR YOU,
TOO. HURRY UP THERE, HUH?
155
00:07:42,262 --> 00:07:43,661
OH, ALL RIGHT.
156
00:07:46,666 --> 00:07:48,132
OH.
157
00:07:48,201 --> 00:07:51,603
THIS GUY'S BEEN FLYING AROUND
THE HOUSE SINCE JULY THE 4TH.
158
00:07:53,006 --> 00:07:54,672
I'LL GET HIM NOW.
159
00:08:04,484 --> 00:08:07,618
ALL RIGHT, HOLD IT, HOLD IT.
HOLD IT, MEATHEAD, DON'T MOVE.
160
00:08:08,521 --> 00:08:10,922
DON'T MOVE, DON'T MOVE.
161
00:08:12,893 --> 00:08:15,193
YEAH, I FINALLY
KNOCKED HIS BRAINS OUT.
162
00:08:16,496 --> 00:08:19,831
ARCH, YOU KILLED A FLY.
ONE OF GOD'S CREATURES.
163
00:08:19,900 --> 00:08:21,933
AW, THAT'S GONNA
MAKE NO DIFFERENCE.
164
00:08:22,002 --> 00:08:25,436
INSECTS AND ANIMALS DON'T
COUNT, THEY AIN'T GOT NO SOULS.
165
00:08:25,505 --> 00:08:28,006
WHICH MEANS THEY CAN'T
GET INTO HEAVEN? THAT'S RIGHT.
166
00:08:28,075 --> 00:08:30,842
WHO'D WANT TO GO TO HEAVEN
IF IT WAS FULL OF FLIES AND DOGS?
167
00:08:35,315 --> 00:08:37,315
MIGHT AS WELL STAY IN NEW YORK.
168
00:08:40,954 --> 00:08:42,721
HELLO, REVEREND FELCHER?
169
00:08:42,789 --> 00:08:44,834
YEAH, I'LL BE RIGHT THERE, EDIE.
170
00:08:44,858 --> 00:08:46,524
YOU STILL GOT SOME
FLY ON YOU, THERE.
171
00:08:46,593 --> 00:08:49,260
YEAH, ARCHIE WANTS
TO TALK TO YOU.
172
00:08:49,329 --> 00:08:50,695
HERE. YEAH.
173
00:08:50,764 --> 00:08:53,164
UH, HELLO THERE,
REVEREND FLETCHER.
174
00:08:53,299 --> 00:08:55,700
WHATEVER.
175
00:08:55,768 --> 00:08:58,169
UH, LISTEN, WHAT I
WANTED TO SAY WAS, UH,
176
00:08:58,238 --> 00:09:02,073
YOU REMEMBER THE ANNUAL APPEAL
FOR THE "LEAK IN ROOF" ENVELOPES?
177
00:09:02,141 --> 00:09:05,410
WE'RE SUPPOSED TO PUT
SOME MONEY IN AND SEND BACK.
178
00:09:05,479 --> 00:09:07,211
I KNOW YOU NEVER GOT MINE.
179
00:09:07,280 --> 00:09:08,891
THAT'S WHAT I'M
TRYING TO TELL YA.
180
00:09:08,915 --> 00:09:11,816
I'M GONNA PUT AN EXTRA BUCK IN
THE BASKET ON SUNDAY FOR THAT.
181
00:09:12,652 --> 00:09:14,552
THAT'S RIGHT, I AM GONNA DO...
182
00:09:14,621 --> 00:09:16,554
YOU'RE GONNA KNOW IT'S MY BUCK.
183
00:09:16,623 --> 00:09:20,258
LOOK FOR THE DOLLAR THAT HAS
"A.B." UNDER "IN GOD WE TRUST."
184
00:09:20,326 --> 00:09:21,760
YEAH.
185
00:09:21,828 --> 00:09:24,362
AND I WANT TO COME TO
CHURCH EVERY SUNDAY NOW.
186
00:09:24,431 --> 00:09:27,799
AND I PROMISE I'M GONNA DO
GOOD WORK FOR THE CHURCH.
187
00:09:27,867 --> 00:09:30,168
ABSOLUTELY, REVEREND.
188
00:09:30,237 --> 00:09:32,648
YEAH, WELL, LISTEN. WE'VE
GOT TO EAT NOW, SO, UH,
189
00:09:32,672 --> 00:09:34,117
I'LL SEE YOU IN CHURCH, HUH?
190
00:09:34,141 --> 00:09:37,742
UH-HUH, YEAH, YEAH, OK, BYE.
191
00:09:37,811 --> 00:09:39,978
THERE. OH, ARCHIE!
192
00:09:40,047 --> 00:09:42,814
I'M SO PROUD OF YOU.
193
00:09:42,882 --> 00:09:44,027
YEAH, CERTAINLY YOU ARE.
194
00:09:44,051 --> 00:09:46,450
I'LL GET DINNER. GET IT, YEAH.
195
00:09:46,519 --> 00:09:48,986
ALL RIGHT. YOU HEARD THAT
TELEPHONE CONVERSATION, DIDN'T YA?
196
00:09:49,055 --> 00:09:51,355
I HEARD IT, I HEARD IT,
BUT I DON'T BELIEVE IT.
197
00:09:51,425 --> 00:09:54,504
BECAUSE COME THIS SUNDAY, YOU'RE
GONNA BE DOING WHAT YOU ALWAYS DO.
198
00:09:54,528 --> 00:09:57,039
YOU'RE GONNA BE SITTING RIGHT
IN THIS CHAIR, DRINKING BEER,
199
00:09:57,063 --> 00:09:59,798
WATCHING T.V. AND
SWEARING AT JOE NAMATH.
200
00:09:59,866 --> 00:10:02,099
YOU WANNA BET ME $5000?
201
00:10:02,169 --> 00:10:04,280
ARCH, DID YOU EVER STOP TO THINK
202
00:10:04,304 --> 00:10:05,836
WHEN THAT CRATE DROPPED...
203
00:10:05,905 --> 00:10:08,239
MAYBE GOD WAS OUT
TO GET YOU AND MISSED?
204
00:10:16,450 --> 00:10:19,451
COME AND GET IT.
OH, BOY, AM I HUNGRY!
205
00:10:19,519 --> 00:10:20,585
OH!
206
00:10:20,653 --> 00:10:22,553
WHO DO YOU THINK YOU ARE?
207
00:10:22,622 --> 00:10:26,291
DIVING AFTER THE FOOD THE
WAY A PELICAN DIVES AFTER FISH.
208
00:10:26,360 --> 00:10:28,125
HOLD IT, HOLD IT, HOLD IT.
209
00:10:28,194 --> 00:10:31,229
NOBODY EATS NOTHIN'
HERE, UNTIL WE SAY GRACE.
210
00:10:32,899 --> 00:10:33,964
WE NEVER SAY GRACE.
211
00:10:34,033 --> 00:10:36,901
WELL, WE'RE GONNA
SAY IT FROM NOW ON.
212
00:10:36,970 --> 00:10:39,904
I ALWAYS SAY GRACE IN MY HEART.
213
00:10:39,973 --> 00:10:42,706
WELL, IN YOUR MOUTH,
YOU'RE GONNA SAY IT TONIGHT.
214
00:10:45,145 --> 00:10:48,112
UH, WE'RE GONNA GIVE GOD
THANKS FOR THE FOOD ON THIS TABLE
215
00:10:48,181 --> 00:10:49,647
WHICH COMES FROM HIM.
216
00:10:49,716 --> 00:10:51,682
MAYBE WE CAN ASK HIM
TO LOWER HIS PRICES.
217
00:10:53,253 --> 00:10:55,353
NEVER MIND. YOU'RE
BLASPHEMING THERE.
218
00:10:56,789 --> 00:10:59,858
JUST CLAM UP, ALL OF YOUSE
NOW AND BOW YOUR HEADS DOWN.
219
00:11:00,460 --> 00:11:01,926
BOW THAT HEAD DOWN.
220
00:11:06,866 --> 00:11:08,666
HELLO, LORD, A. BUNKER HERE.
221
00:11:11,070 --> 00:11:15,406
I WANNA GIVE THOU THANKS FOR THE
FOOD THAT THOU PUT ON THE TABLE HERE.
222
00:11:15,475 --> 00:11:17,809
FOR INSTANCE, THE SALAD.
223
00:11:17,877 --> 00:11:19,343
THE, UH, MEATLOAF,
224
00:11:20,347 --> 00:11:22,747
PEARL POTATOES, UM,
225
00:11:22,815 --> 00:11:24,648
CHOPPED UP GREEN STUFF HERE.
226
00:11:25,885 --> 00:11:27,652
BROCCOLI.
227
00:11:27,720 --> 00:11:29,720
SHE SAYS IT'S BROCCOLI, LORD,
228
00:11:34,327 --> 00:11:37,595
AND FOR SNATCHING ME FROM THE,
WHAT DO YOU CALL, "JAWS OF DEATH,"
229
00:11:37,664 --> 00:11:42,133
I'LL THANK YOU FOR THAT IN PRIVATE
BEFORE I GO TO BED TONIGHT. AMEN.
230
00:11:42,201 --> 00:11:44,869
OH, ARCHIE, THAT WAS BEAUTIFUL.
231
00:11:44,938 --> 00:11:46,178
DAMN RIGHT IT WAS.
232
00:11:49,943 --> 00:11:51,508
ALL RIGHT, CAN WE EAT NOW?
233
00:11:51,578 --> 00:11:53,110
HOLD IT, HOLD IT.
234
00:11:53,914 --> 00:11:55,154
GIVE ME THAT.
235
00:11:57,650 --> 00:11:58,650
NOW.
236
00:12:28,281 --> 00:12:29,948
HEY, DADDY.
237
00:12:30,016 --> 00:12:32,995
DID YOU EVER THINK THAT CRATE JUST
MISSING YOU WAS PROBABLY PURE LUCK?
238
00:12:33,019 --> 00:12:37,355
AW, LUCK, LUCK, LUCK. WHO DO YOU
THINK IS THE BOSS OVER ALL LUCK?
239
00:12:37,423 --> 00:12:39,623
GOD. THAT'S RIGHT.
240
00:12:39,692 --> 00:12:42,238
IT WAS GOOD LUCK. ANYTHING
BAD COMES FROM THE DEVIL.
241
00:12:42,262 --> 00:12:44,896
ARCH, THERE IS NO DEVIL,
THERE IS NO HEAVEN,
242
00:12:44,965 --> 00:12:46,925
THERE IS NO HELL,
AND THERE IS NO GOD.
243
00:12:46,966 --> 00:12:48,678
OH, THERE HE GOES AGAIN, LORD!
244
00:12:50,003 --> 00:12:52,014
THAT'S RIGHT, ARCH, I'LL
TELL YOU SOMETHING ELSE...
245
00:12:52,038 --> 00:12:53,850
LORD, LISTEN TO THIS.
246
00:12:53,874 --> 00:12:56,018
HEY, HEY, HEY. MICHAEL,
WHAT'S THE MATTER?
247
00:12:56,042 --> 00:12:58,142
FOOD WENT DOWN THE WRONG WAY.
248
00:12:58,211 --> 00:13:01,123
OH, NO! WHAT THE LORD SERVIN' THEM
WORDS BACK DOWN YOUR THROAT AGAIN.
249
00:13:03,784 --> 00:13:06,818
RAISE YOUR ARMS OVER YOUR HEAD.
250
00:13:08,488 --> 00:13:10,066
SHUT UP. GO ON.
251
00:13:10,090 --> 00:13:12,368
THAT'LL SHOW YOU TO FOOL
AROUND WITH THE LORD, YOU WISE GUY.
252
00:13:12,392 --> 00:13:13,958
HONEY, SIT DOWN.
253
00:13:14,027 --> 00:13:16,472
PUT YOUR HEAD BETWEEN YOUR LEGS!
254
00:13:16,496 --> 00:13:18,777
STICK HIS HEAD OUT
THE FRONT DOOR.
255
00:13:19,666 --> 00:13:21,432
GET AFTER HIM, LORD
256
00:13:21,501 --> 00:13:25,736
GO AHEAD, HA-HA, DO YOUR
STUFF, LORD, DO YOUR STUFF!
257
00:13:33,846 --> 00:13:35,580
OH, HI, HONEY.
258
00:13:35,648 --> 00:13:37,415
HI. BREAKFAST READY YET?
259
00:13:37,484 --> 00:13:40,162
OH, WE'LL HAVE OURS AFTER MA
AND DADDY GO TO CHURCH, OK?
260
00:13:40,186 --> 00:13:43,053
GEE. I GOTTA ADMIT, I NEVER
THOUGHT HE'D LAST THIS LONG.
261
00:13:43,123 --> 00:13:47,392
3 SUNDAYS IN A ROW, THAT GUY
MUST BE BUCKING FOR SAINTHOOD.
262
00:13:47,460 --> 00:13:50,239
YEAH, MA SAYS, HE SAYS HIS
PRAYERS EVERY NIGHT AT BEDTIME
263
00:13:50,263 --> 00:13:52,074
AND HE'S STILL SAYING
GRACE AT EVERY MEAL.
264
00:13:52,098 --> 00:13:55,867
YEAH, BUT HAVE YOU NOTICED THE GRACES
ARE GETTING SHORTER AND SHORTER?
265
00:13:55,935 --> 00:13:59,036
LAST NIGHT'S GRACE WAS JUST
ENOUGH TO COVER THE SOUP.
266
00:13:59,105 --> 00:14:01,840
HURRY, YOU DON'T WANNA
MISS THE FIRST HYMN.
267
00:14:01,908 --> 00:14:05,143
I'LL WHISTLE THE FIRST HYMN FOR
YOU ON THE WAY OVER TO THE CHURCH.
268
00:14:05,212 --> 00:14:08,246
NOW REMEMBER, WHEN THE
SERVICES ARE OVER, I DON'T WANT YOU
269
00:14:08,315 --> 00:14:10,893
WASTIN' TIME YAPPIN' WITH
THAT REVEREND FLETCHER.
270
00:14:10,917 --> 00:14:13,751
FELCHER. WHATEVER.
271
00:14:13,820 --> 00:14:17,088
I WANNA RACE RIGHT HOME AND TUNE
IN ON THE FOOTBALL GAME HERE ON T.V.
272
00:14:17,157 --> 00:14:19,790
HAVE YOU GOT YOUR DOLLAR
FOR THE COLLECTION PLATE?
273
00:14:19,860 --> 00:14:22,060
I GOT IT RIGHT OVER
HERE IN MY WALLET.
274
00:14:22,128 --> 00:14:25,263
JEEZ, A DOLLAR A WEEK, IN
THAT PLATE FROM NOW ON.
275
00:14:26,466 --> 00:14:30,134
THAT COMES TO WHAT,
NEARLY $50 A YEAR.
276
00:14:30,203 --> 00:14:32,014
WELL, ARCHIE, YOU SAID YOURSELF
277
00:14:32,038 --> 00:14:35,807
YOU WAS PAYIN' BACK THE
LORD FOR SAVIN' YOUR LIFE.
278
00:14:35,875 --> 00:14:37,442
10 CENTS WOULD'VE COVERED THAT.
279
00:14:40,813 --> 00:14:42,791
HAVE YOU GOT THE RAFFLE TICKET?
280
00:14:42,815 --> 00:14:44,348
YEAH, I GOT IT RIGHT HERE.
281
00:14:44,417 --> 00:14:46,083
THEY'RE GONNA ANNOUNCE
THE WINNER TODAY.
282
00:14:46,152 --> 00:14:49,420
THIS LITTLE ITEM IS GONNA GET THE
FAMILY A BRAND NEW COLOR T.V. SET.
283
00:14:49,489 --> 00:14:51,989
OH, DID THAT LITTLE
VOICE TELL YOU THAT?
284
00:14:52,058 --> 00:14:53,657
THAT'S RIGHT, MEATHEAD.
285
00:14:53,726 --> 00:14:56,205
THE LITTLE VOICE TOLD ME TO GET
THIS TICKET 'CAUSE IT'S NUMBER 18
286
00:14:56,229 --> 00:14:57,461
WHICH IS MY LUCKY NUMBER.
287
00:14:57,530 --> 00:14:59,830
OH, YOU BELIEVE IN
LUCKY NUMBERS TOO, HUH?
288
00:14:59,899 --> 00:15:03,067
WHEN IT'S BASED ON
COLD HARD FACTS, YEAH.
289
00:15:03,136 --> 00:15:06,104
FOR INSTANCE, THE LORD SAVED
ME ON THE 18TH OF THE MONTH.
290
00:15:06,172 --> 00:15:08,506
I WAS BORN ON THE
18TH OF THE MONTH.
291
00:15:08,575 --> 00:15:11,576
USED TO HAVE A LOCKER YEARS
AGO WITH WORK: NUMBER 18.
292
00:15:11,644 --> 00:15:14,912
AND WHEN YOU FIRST
MET ME, I WAS 18.
293
00:15:21,487 --> 00:15:23,855
WELL, NOT EVERY
SYSTEM IS PERFECT, EDITH.
294
00:15:26,959 --> 00:15:27,959
BYE.
295
00:15:28,027 --> 00:15:29,027
BYE.
296
00:15:29,095 --> 00:15:30,095
SO LONG.
297
00:15:32,799 --> 00:15:34,165
I DON'T KNOW, I DON'T KNOW,
298
00:15:34,234 --> 00:15:36,734
I TRIED FIXING THAT
TOILET AGAIN, I CAN'T DO IT.
299
00:15:36,803 --> 00:15:38,502
MAYBE WE'LL JUST HAVE
TO GET ANOTHER ONE.
300
00:15:38,571 --> 00:15:39,703
YEAH.
301
00:15:39,773 --> 00:15:41,733
2 HEADS ARE BETTER THAN ONE.
302
00:15:48,614 --> 00:15:51,049
YOO-HOO! WE'RE HOME.
303
00:15:51,117 --> 00:15:52,550
HI, MA.
304
00:15:52,618 --> 00:15:54,496
HI, DADDY, HOW WAS THE SERMON?
305
00:15:54,520 --> 00:15:57,254
AH, THAT GUY
NEVER STOPS TALKIN'.
306
00:15:57,323 --> 00:16:00,524
HE DON'T GIVE SERMONS, HE
GIVES A WEEKLY FILIBOOSTER.
307
00:16:00,593 --> 00:16:04,829
AND YOU, DON'T YOU NEVER POKE
ME IN THE RIBS IN CHURCH NO MORE.
308
00:16:04,897 --> 00:16:07,531
BUT, ARCHIE, YOU
WERE SOUND ASLEEP.
309
00:16:09,369 --> 00:16:11,449
THE WHOLE
CONJUGATION WAS ASLEEP.
310
00:16:13,439 --> 00:16:14,872
PICTURE PUZZLE.
311
00:16:14,941 --> 00:16:17,808
WHAT MAN IN THIS ROOM DID
NOT WIN A COLOR T.V. TODAY?
312
00:16:17,877 --> 00:16:20,010
ARCHIE DIDN'T.
313
00:16:20,079 --> 00:16:21,979
MIKE, HOW DID YOU KNOW?
314
00:16:22,982 --> 00:16:24,047
OH, WHO WON IT?
315
00:16:24,117 --> 00:16:27,151
OH, SOME WOMAN FROM
TRENTON, NEW JERSEY.
316
00:16:27,220 --> 00:16:29,198
AND SHE DON'T EVEN
GO TO OUR CHURCH.
317
00:16:29,222 --> 00:16:32,102
DO I RUN DOWN TO TRENTON TO
WIN PRIZES FROM THEM PEOPLE?
318
00:16:34,193 --> 00:16:38,061
MY 2 POOR KNEES ARE WORE OUT FROM
KNEELIN' DOWN AND PRAYIN' FOR THAT THING.
319
00:16:38,131 --> 00:16:41,031
UH, WHAT'S THE MATTER, ARCH,
YOU LOSING YOUR FAITH IN GOD?
320
00:16:41,100 --> 00:16:43,634
NO, DID YOU FIX THE
BALL IN THE TOILET YET?
321
00:16:43,703 --> 00:16:45,014
I WAS WORKING ON IT, ALL RIGHT?
322
00:16:45,038 --> 00:16:46,804
GIVE ME A HAND UPSTAIRS
WILL YOU, GLORIA?
323
00:16:46,872 --> 00:16:48,550
WELL, YOU FIX IT
THIS TIME, WILL YA?
324
00:16:48,574 --> 00:16:52,443
FIGHTING THAT COPPER BALL TAKES
ALL THE FUN OUT OF GOIN' TO THE TOILET.
325
00:16:58,084 --> 00:16:59,483
I'LL GET IT.
326
00:16:59,551 --> 00:17:01,511
GET THE PHONE, EDITH.
327
00:17:02,054 --> 00:17:03,120
HELLO.
328
00:17:03,189 --> 00:17:05,823
OH, HELLO, REVEREND FELCHER.
329
00:17:06,492 --> 00:17:07,858
YEAH, HE IS.
330
00:17:09,896 --> 00:17:12,663
I DON'T KNOW, I'LL ASK HIM.
331
00:17:12,732 --> 00:17:13,830
ASK ME WHAT?
332
00:17:13,899 --> 00:17:15,766
HOLD ON, JUST A MINUTE.
333
00:17:15,835 --> 00:17:19,370
THE REVEREND FELCHER WANTS
YOU TO DRIVE THE CHURCH BUS
334
00:17:19,439 --> 00:17:21,639
ON SUNDAY AFTERNOON.
335
00:17:21,708 --> 00:17:23,340
WHAT CHURCH BUS?
336
00:17:23,409 --> 00:17:28,179
WELL, THEY GOT A BUS NOW TO DRIVE
AROUND THE SENIOR CIRCLE SOCIETY.
337
00:17:28,247 --> 00:17:29,747
OH, JEEZ.
338
00:17:29,816 --> 00:17:33,150
HE SAID IT WOULD BE LIKE
DRIVING FOR THE LORD.
339
00:17:33,219 --> 00:17:34,952
DOESN'T THAT SOUND NICE?
340
00:17:38,124 --> 00:17:39,489
GIVE ME THE PHONE.
341
00:17:39,558 --> 00:17:40,758
WELL, IT'S OVER THERE.
342
00:17:40,827 --> 00:17:42,292
GET OUT OF THE WAY.
343
00:17:43,329 --> 00:17:45,295
ARCHIE, BE NICE.
344
00:17:45,364 --> 00:17:47,631
SHUSH, YOU.
345
00:17:47,700 --> 00:17:51,001
HEY, BEFORE YOU SAY ANYTHING,
REVEREND, MY SUNDAYS ARE ALL JAMMED UP.
346
00:17:51,771 --> 00:17:53,237
HUH?
347
00:17:53,305 --> 00:17:55,540
WELL, I... I KNOW I PROM...
348
00:17:55,608 --> 00:17:57,875
YEAH, I KNOW I PROMISED.
349
00:17:57,944 --> 00:17:59,788
YEAH, I KNOW I PROMISED...
350
00:17:59,812 --> 00:18:02,113
WHY THE HELL DID YOU
ANSWER THIS PHONE?
351
00:18:04,083 --> 00:18:05,583
YEAH.
352
00:18:05,651 --> 00:18:09,787
YEAH, OK, WELL, YEAH, I'M GONNA
KEEP THE PROMISE, SURE. WHAT TIME?
353
00:18:09,856 --> 00:18:12,857
2:00. YEAH, I'LL BE THERE.
354
00:18:12,925 --> 00:18:14,958
NO, I WON'T FORGET.
355
00:18:15,027 --> 00:18:17,995
NO, I'LL REMEMBER,
BECAUSE 2:00 IS KICK-OFF TIME.
356
00:18:19,632 --> 00:18:21,098
GOD BLESS YOU, TOO.
357
00:18:22,268 --> 00:18:25,169
DAMN, DAMN, AND DAMN!
358
00:18:25,238 --> 00:18:26,503
ARCHIE.
359
00:18:27,406 --> 00:18:29,907
PLEASE DON'T SWEAR ON SUNDAY.
360
00:18:29,976 --> 00:18:33,177
I WILL SWEAR ON ANY SUNDAY
WHEN THAT SUNDAY IS RUINED.
361
00:18:33,246 --> 00:18:34,912
AND THIS SUNDAY IS RUINED.
362
00:18:34,980 --> 00:18:39,716
I GOTTA SPEND IT BUSSING A LOT
OF OLD HAS-BEENS AND HOLDOVERS.
363
00:18:39,785 --> 00:18:42,486
I GOTTA TAKE 'EM TO THAT
SUPPER SERVICE TONIGHT
364
00:18:42,555 --> 00:18:45,401
THEN I GOTTA WAIT AROUND WITH
THE BUS AND BUS 'EM ALL HOME AGAIN.
365
00:18:45,425 --> 00:18:47,892
YOU'LL GET A FREE CHURCH DINNER.
366
00:18:47,961 --> 00:18:50,706
OH, JEEZ, BIG DEAL, A
FREE CHURCH DINNER.
367
00:18:50,730 --> 00:18:53,363
I COULD GET ONE OF THEM
AT THE SALIVATION ARMY.
368
00:18:54,333 --> 00:18:56,166
HI, ARCH. HIYA, STRETCH.
369
00:18:56,235 --> 00:18:57,768
OH, HI THERE, EDITH. HI.
370
00:18:57,837 --> 00:18:59,715
HEY, ARCH, HAVE I GOT
SOMETHIN' FOR THE 2 OF US.
371
00:18:59,739 --> 00:19:02,573
HUH? 2 TICKETS TO THE
JETS GAME FOR TODAY.
372
00:19:02,642 --> 00:19:04,175
WHAT?
373
00:19:04,243 --> 00:19:06,410
LOOK AT THAT. RIGHT
ON THE 50 YARD LINE,
374
00:19:06,479 --> 00:19:08,190
CLOSE ENOUGH TO
HEAR THE BONES BREAK.
375
00:19:10,216 --> 00:19:13,217
EDITH, THEY'RE TICKETS
TO THE JETS GAME TODAY.
376
00:19:13,286 --> 00:19:17,288
UH, ARCHIE CAN'T GO, STRETCH, 'CAUSE
HE PROMISED THE REVEREND FELCHER
377
00:19:17,356 --> 00:19:19,990
HE'D DRIVE FOR THE LORD TODAY.
378
00:19:20,059 --> 00:19:22,593
I GOTTA DRIVE FOR
THE LORD TODAY.
379
00:19:22,662 --> 00:19:25,029
UH, WHAT ARE YOU
DRIVING, ARCH, A HEARSE?
380
00:19:27,867 --> 00:19:30,233
YEAH, BUT THE PEOPLE
ARE ALL SITTIN' UP.
381
00:19:32,304 --> 00:19:34,805
WELL, IT'S, UH, TOO BAD
YOU CAN'T GO TO THE GAME.
382
00:19:34,874 --> 00:19:36,184
BUT LIKE IT SAYS IN THE BIBLE,
383
00:19:36,208 --> 00:19:38,542
THE LORD GIVETH AND
THE LORD TAKETH AWAY.
384
00:19:38,611 --> 00:19:40,611
OH, JEEZ.
385
00:19:40,680 --> 00:19:41,945
TOUGH LUCKETH.
386
00:19:43,683 --> 00:19:45,082
DADDY,
387
00:19:45,150 --> 00:19:46,850
MICHAEL NEEDS
YOUR HELP UPSTAIRS.
388
00:19:46,919 --> 00:19:48,630
EVERYBODY NEEDS MY HELP TODAY.
389
00:19:48,654 --> 00:19:51,421
WHEN IS SOMEONE GOIN'
TO GIVE ME SOME HELP?
390
00:19:51,490 --> 00:19:53,824
BOY, IS HE GETTIN' CRABBY.
391
00:19:53,893 --> 00:19:57,828
OH, NO, GLORIA, HE'S
SO DISAPPOINTED.
392
00:19:57,896 --> 00:20:01,232
HE CAN'T GO TO THE JETS
GAME WITH STRETCH TODAY
393
00:20:01,300 --> 00:20:05,135
'CAUSE HE WAS CALLED
TO DRIVE THE CHURCH BUS.
394
00:20:05,204 --> 00:20:07,871
CALLED? YOU MEAN HE
HEARD A VOICE AGAIN?
395
00:20:07,940 --> 00:20:10,341
OH, NO.
396
00:20:10,409 --> 00:20:14,778
WELL, YEAH, THE REVEREND
FELCHER'S VOICE ON THE PHONE.
397
00:20:16,048 --> 00:20:17,792
OH. OH!
398
00:20:17,816 --> 00:20:19,083
ARCHIE, WHAT IS THE MATTER?
399
00:20:19,152 --> 00:20:20,529
DADDY! WHAT HAPPENED?
400
00:20:20,553 --> 00:20:22,486
DADDY? I'M SORRY, ARCH.
401
00:20:22,555 --> 00:20:24,967
GET AWAY FROM ME,
YOU MEATHEAD, YOU.
402
00:20:24,991 --> 00:20:27,136
WHAT? I WAS JUST TRYING
TO HELP YOU. GET AWAY.
403
00:20:27,160 --> 00:20:28,759
I'M SORRY. AWAY.
404
00:20:28,828 --> 00:20:31,395
EVERY TIME HE COMES NEAR
ME, SOMETHING HAPPENS HERE.
405
00:20:31,464 --> 00:20:33,030
WHAT HAPPENED?
406
00:20:33,099 --> 00:20:36,733
THIS DUMBBELL DROPPED THE
HEAVY LID OF THE TOILET TANK
407
00:20:36,802 --> 00:20:39,370
RIGHT ON MY INSTOOP, HERE.
408
00:20:39,439 --> 00:20:42,473
HERE, LET ME GIVE YOU A HAND,
ARCH. GET AWAY FROM ME, YOU.
409
00:20:42,541 --> 00:20:43,852
WELL, LET ME LOOK AT IT. OH.
410
00:20:43,876 --> 00:20:45,553
LOOK, WHAT... WHAT
ARE YOU GONNA LOOK?
411
00:20:45,577 --> 00:20:47,044
HOW'RE YOU GONNA SEE PAIN?
412
00:20:49,215 --> 00:20:51,082
ARCHIE,
413
00:20:51,150 --> 00:20:54,418
DO YOU THINK YOU'LL STILL BE
ABLE TO DRIVE THE CHURCH BUS?
414
00:21:04,263 --> 00:21:06,797
OH, JEEZ, I WOULDN'T
THINK SO, EDITH.
415
00:21:06,866 --> 00:21:10,634
I MEAN, IT'S THE RIGHT FOOT. HOW CAN
I DRIVE, DEAR? I CAN HARDLY STAND UP.
416
00:21:10,703 --> 00:21:13,370
WELL, LET ME SIT DOWN. THE
PAIN'S GETTING WORSE HERE.
417
00:21:13,439 --> 00:21:15,105
GEE.
418
00:21:15,174 --> 00:21:18,053
I TELL YOU WHAT, YOU BETTER
CALL UP THE REVEREND FLETCHER.
419
00:21:18,077 --> 00:21:20,844
FELCHER. WHATEVER.
420
00:21:20,913 --> 00:21:22,924
AND TELL HIM TO GET
SOMEBODY ELSE TO DRIVE
421
00:21:22,948 --> 00:21:26,450
'CAUSE I WOULDN'T WANNA
DISAPPOINT ALL THEM NICE OLD FOLKS.
422
00:21:26,519 --> 00:21:28,163
ALL RIGHT. RIGHT AWAY.
423
00:21:28,187 --> 00:21:29,653
WE BETTER ELEVATE THAT FOOT.
424
00:21:29,722 --> 00:21:32,522
MICHAEL, PULL OVER THE COFFEE
TABLE. GET A PILLOW FOR IT.
425
00:21:32,591 --> 00:21:34,903
WILL THAT HELP ME, LITTLE
GIRL? I THINK IT'LL HELP, DADDY.
426
00:21:34,927 --> 00:21:37,261
YEAH, YOU'RE A
GOOD GIRL. I KNOW.
427
00:21:37,329 --> 00:21:41,131
ARCH, LET ME TAKE YOUR SHOE
OFF... GET AWAY FROM THERE!
428
00:21:41,200 --> 00:21:43,967
THAT SHOE MIGHT BE THE ONLY
THING HOLDIN' THE FOOT TOGETHER.
429
00:21:45,871 --> 00:21:49,473
DADDY, IF THE FOOT'S THAT BAD, MAYBE
WE SHOULD BE CALLING THE DOCTOR.
430
00:21:49,542 --> 00:21:51,420
NEVER MIND THE DOCTOR,
GET A PLUMBER, WILL YA?
431
00:21:51,444 --> 00:21:54,445
THAT TOILET'S OUT TO KILL ME.
432
00:21:54,514 --> 00:21:58,281
OH, THANK YOU VERY
MUCH, YEAH. OH, GOODBYE.
433
00:21:58,350 --> 00:22:02,219
REVEREND FELCHER SAYS HE'LL
GET SOMEBODY TO DRIVE THE BUS.
434
00:22:02,287 --> 00:22:04,989
AND HE SAID HE'D SAY
A PRAYER FOR YOU.
435
00:22:05,057 --> 00:22:08,092
I HOPE HE KEEPS IT SHORT,
HE'LL PUT THE LORD TO SLEEP.
436
00:22:08,160 --> 00:22:09,392
DADDY, DOES IT HURT?
437
00:22:09,461 --> 00:22:10,772
I GOT PAIN HERE.
438
00:22:10,796 --> 00:22:13,264
I'LL GET IT. I'LL GET
YOU AN ICE BAG.
439
00:22:13,332 --> 00:22:14,409
THANK YOU, SWEETHEART.
440
00:22:14,433 --> 00:22:16,833
OH, HI, IRENE. COME IN. HI.
441
00:22:16,902 --> 00:22:20,537
I JUST CAME OVER TO SEE IF I
COULD BORROW ARCHIE'S BINOCULARS.
442
00:22:20,606 --> 00:22:22,639
OF COURSE. AH! THE PAIN HERE.
443
00:22:23,809 --> 00:22:25,420
WHAT'S THE MATTER
WITH YOUR FOOT?
444
00:22:25,444 --> 00:22:27,277
GOD'S AIM IS GETTIN' BETTER.
445
00:22:30,415 --> 00:22:32,249
HERE YOU GO, IRENE.
446
00:22:32,317 --> 00:22:33,950
OH, THANK YOU, EDITH.
447
00:22:34,019 --> 00:22:35,830
HEY, WHAT DO YOU WANT THE
BINOCULARS FOR THERE, IRENE?
448
00:22:35,854 --> 00:22:39,156
DON'T TELL ME BARNEY HEFNER
IS LEAVIN' HIS SHADES UP AGAIN.
449
00:22:39,224 --> 00:22:41,892
NO, STRETCH WANTS
THEM FOR THE GAME TODAY.
450
00:22:41,961 --> 00:22:44,428
WAIT A MINUTE. AIN'T STRETCH
LEFT FOR THE GAME YET?
451
00:22:44,496 --> 00:22:47,464
OH, HE'S OVER AT MY HOUSE HAVIN'
MILK AND COOKIES. HOLD EVERYTHING,
452
00:22:47,533 --> 00:22:50,734
MAYBE I'M IN LUCK. MAYBE I
CAN CATCH HIM BEFORE HE GOES.
453
00:22:50,803 --> 00:22:53,571
ARCHIE! LOOK, YOU'RE
WALKIN' GOOD AGAIN.
454
00:22:53,639 --> 00:22:56,051
HEY, I WAS SITTIN' IN THE
CHAIR THERE, PRAYIN' FOR RELIEF
455
00:22:56,075 --> 00:22:58,342
AND GUESS WHAT
HAPPENED? I GOT RELIEF.
456
00:23:03,182 --> 00:23:05,316
ANOTHER MIRACLE.
PRAISE THE LORD!
457
00:23:06,685 --> 00:23:08,586
SHUT UP, YOU.
458
00:23:08,654 --> 00:23:12,189
DADDY, I GOT THE ICE BAG. WHAT
ARE YOU DOIN' ON YOUR BAD FOOT?
459
00:23:12,258 --> 00:23:15,337
I KNOW I SHOULDN'T BE, BUT I CAN'T
LET STRETCH GO TO A BALL GAME ALONE.
460
00:23:15,361 --> 00:23:17,127
OH, HE'S NOT GOING ALONE.
461
00:23:17,195 --> 00:23:18,529
HUH?
462
00:23:18,597 --> 00:23:21,264
HE SAID YOU COULDN'T
MAKE IT AND THEN HE TOLD ME:
463
00:23:21,333 --> 00:23:25,069
"ARCH CAN'T GO, SO I'M TAKING ONE
OF THE OTHER GUYS FROM WORK."
464
00:23:25,137 --> 00:23:27,404
DON'T TELL ME THAT, IRENE.
465
00:23:27,473 --> 00:23:28,738
WHO'S HE TAKIN'?
466
00:23:28,807 --> 00:23:29,807
ME.
467
00:23:39,418 --> 00:23:40,418
OH!
468
00:23:45,624 --> 00:23:48,358
WHY DO THESE
THINGS HAPPEN TO ME?
469
00:23:49,662 --> 00:23:52,129
THE LORD WORKS IN
MYSTERIOUS WAYS, ARCHIE.
470
00:24:17,556 --> 00:24:19,668
ALL IN THE FAMILY WAS
RECORDED ON TAPE
471
00:24:19,692 --> 00:24:21,324
BEFORE A LIVE AUDIENCE.
472
00:24:22,305 --> 00:25:22,400
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473
00:25:22,450 --> 00:25:27,000
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