All language subtitles for Lethal.Weapon.S03E08.720p.BluRay.x264-YELLOWBiRD

What are we doing?
It's Christmastime.

Tell me if this stings.

Yeah, it stings.

Good.

Not expired.

So, what happened?

Same as every day.

Tomas and his dumbass crew
gave me crap

'cause I don't know
the language yet.

I just hate it here.

Remember you said
the same thing in Cairo?

And before that, in Athens.

Ten bucks says,
by next Christmas,

you and Tomas will be best friends.

- Ow.
- Oh, sorry. That one's deep.

- Ow.
- Okay, just hold still, baby.

Close your eyes.

If you could be

anywhere in the world right now,
where would you want to be?

Armenia.

I liked Armenia.

Okay, so...

picture the mountains
above Jermuk.

There's two feet
of fresh snow.

You're skiing
from hot spring

to hot spring.

There.

Done.

Better?

Yeah.

Put on the hat.

What?

Every year. Why?

It's a Cole family tradition.

'Cause some memories

are worth holding on to.

Aw, you blinked.

Gonna try another one.

We already did
another one.

Why do we have
to keep doing this?

Cole family tradition.

Some memories
are worth holding on to.

I thought
the Cole family tradition

was a phone call each Christmas
from a different war zone.

Well...

this is a year
of new traditions.

I'm here.

Your mom's engaged.

You're not sorry you're...

not celebrating Christmas
with Andrew's parents, are you?

Are you kidding?

They live on a golf course
in San Diego.

That's basically, like,
a retirement community.

Okay, here's the plan.

We're gonna have a Christmas

that makes up
for all the ones that I missed.

It's gonna be
the best Christmas ever.

You don't have to say that.

Mom told me to keep
my expectations low.

So...

Okay. Well, I'm doubling down.

Best Christmas ever.

Hey, buddy.
Cool flippers.

I think Jacques Cousteau's
here to see you.

Hey, Sam.

Are you coming?
My dad chucked

a bunch of quarters
into the deep end.

Dad, can I go swimming already?

Yeah, of course.

After one more picture.

Here we go.

All right.

I'm loving it, man.

I'm there six weeks,

and they already put me in
charge of tires and brake pads.

It's just a matter of time
before they name you

the third Pep Boy.

Yeah, my parole officer's happy

about it.

Sam and I will be able
to move out

of this place pretty soon.

Well, you got to make sure
you come say goodbye first.

We're gonna miss you guys.

Well, it won't be for a while.

I mean, I got to save
some more money.

Can't even afford to buy this
guy Christmas gifts right now.

Hey, this is a
guy from work.

You mind keeping
an eye on Sam for me?

Yeah, of course.

Did you pack?

How are you getting
to the airport?

Uh, I think

- there's a bus from downtown.
- Don't think.

And don't take the bus.

Take a cab. We'll pay for it.

- It's RJ. Look. It's your mother.
- Hi.

- Yup, Dad, we can see him. Yup.
- Say hi.

Well, give it to me
when you're done.

- Yeah.
- Oh, RJ,

bring back Costa Rica T-shirts,
please.

Hey, did you,

um, print out your
boarding pass?

Yeah, yeah. I-I printed
my boarding pass. I'm good.

Don't just open up the e-mail.

- You have to print it.
- He just said he printed it.

Okay, and when is
your return flight?

Uh, I don't know.
I haven't booked it.

Um, I was gonna do that
when I got home.

Okay.

That's-that's a good idea, son.

All right. Love you,
and I will see you tomorrow.

Did you hear that?

The part where you
didn't hand me the phone?

No. The return flight.

He didn't make one. Maybe
he's given up on Costa Rica,

and maybe
we can convince him to stay.

Baby, we can't convince RJ
to do anything.

- It is not our job. He is an adu...
- Yes, it is.

- No, it's not.
- It is.

Roger, he's an adult.

But that gives
me an idea.

- Hmm?
- We can do a family dinner.

Family dinner?
No, we got to go bigger.

I'm thinking a partay.

- A partay?
- Yes.

- Roger, I don't kn...
- With the get down,

- like the kids are doing.
- Oh, my gosh.

- No.
- Uh... Wait, seriously?

A partay
for coming home?

- I'm here all the time.
- Yeah, and we'll have

a party for you
when you're 35 years old

and married to the guy
that we both approve.

- Thank you.
- In the meantime,

let's make this a night
that RJ remembers.

Okay. Fine.

Fine.

A small party.

- Yes.
- Okay?

Okay. Wh... You act
like I'm gonna go overboard.

Alan,

I heard something downstairs.

Probably just
the house settling.

That's not a real thing.
Go look.

- I'm calling 911.
- Screw that.

Sorry, hon,

you're getting
your Christmas present early.

You got me a shotgun
for Christmas?

You always return
the sweaters.

Nobody move!

Those firearm lessons
really paid off.

I mean, who knew?

I'm assuming you have
a permit for that thing.

Yeah, she does. A permit
to splatter a guy

all over our Christmas tree
and soak all the ornaments.

Okay, Doc, let's go.

You've got teeth
to straighten.

Are you okay, Roger?

You're very quiet
this morning.

Very banter-free.

Yeah, me, I'm good.

Just a little pensive.

You know, thinking about things,
things like...

how hard is it for you
to RSVP to a party

to which you were invited?

Roger, did you invite me
to a party?

Yeah, don't.
It's digital,

which means I know you read it.

I know when you read it.

Early this morning.

Oh. That party.

- Yeah, that party.
- Yeah.

Yeah, I can't make that.

It's my first holiday
season with Maya.

So bring her.

There's a space
on the RSVP for guests.

Just that one click,

and I get that satisfying ding.

Like that.

Scorsese.

Plus four?!

W... I don't know exactly

who they're gonna be yet.
Is that too many?

You didn't cap off
the invite list.

Do you mind if I...

It is my favorite part, but...

yeah.

What is it?

I'm giving you your RSVP.

I'm not gonna be able to make it
to that party, Roger.

Three home invasions
in the last month,

and you got him.
How is this not open-and-shut?

You have your dead perp,
Lewis Fowler,

and you know
who his partner is.

Actually, we don't.
There's a lot of nuances here.

Wait, you saw your dead home
invader conspiring yesterday

at your hotel with an ex-con.

"Conspiring"
is a loaded term.

Oscar's a good man.

He is an ex-con

who literally did time
for breaking and entering.

I know the guy.

Our kids are friends.
He's turned his life around.

Huh. And what does
your partner think?

He thinks he did it.

But, between us, Roger's
a little preoccupied

with this party he's throwing.

What party?

He didn't invite me.

Well, that's because
you and Todd go

to Wyoming every Christmas

- to see his parents.
- I'm sorry, is this Wyoming?

Are we in Wyoming right now?

No.
It's not Wyoming.

Are you okay, Captain?

Everything good
with you and Todd?

And now I'm being interrogated
about the status

of my relationship
on Christmas Eve?

That's perfect.

Okay.

So we'll, uh, just go
to the motel and talk to Oscar.

Great.

I'll let Roger know
you're in town for the holidays.

Awesome.

Okay.

Ah, Detectives.

It's a pre-Christmas miracle.

Let me guess... you guys heard
about my holiday cookies.

We need to borrow your slab.

What do we got?

Chopped-up
body parts.

A jogger found them
in Griffith Park.

It's the holidays,
so, of course,

Murtaugh and Cole catch
a simple case,

and we get to spend
the day putting together

some random guy's bits.

The patriarchy strikes again.

I think we got
the better gig.

Come on, guys, we get
to make a puzzle

out of body parts.

You're kind of a weirdo,

aren't you?

Hey, you're both going
to Murtaugh's, right?

Any interest
in a little pre-game action?

I know this spicy,
spicy kombucha joint.

- Zero interest.
- I'm in.

Cool.

All right.
I'll text you the details.

Ran out of gloves.

Be right back.

Just so you know, you don't
have to be polite to Scorsese.

You'll want to, you know, shut
him down earlier in the day,

before he gets his hopes up.

Oh, I wasn't
gonna shut him down.

I love kombucha.

Everybody does.

But it's Scorsese.

So...

Dude seems interesting.

I keep forgetting
that you're new.

Some people have
to learn the hard way.

I like the hard way.

Listen, the only reason

I'm letting you guys in here
is 'cause of my respect

and affection
for your partner.

Also, we have
a warrant.

Well, yeah,
you have that, too,

but a lot of it's 'cause of the respect -
Yeah.

- and affection for your partner.
- For the-for the partner. Yeah.

- Yeah.
- Open the door.

Okay. Yeah, yeah,
I can do that.

I've got a magnetic personality.

The Howard Hughes of this place.

I am.

Why don't you and the president
of your fan club get started.

I got to take this.

- Hey, baby. How you doing?
- Roger,

remember when you said we were
keeping RJ's party small?

Now...

did you order
an ice sculpture?

Of course I didn't.

Now, did I
make a call and get a quote

from a guy
for a ice sculpture? Uh...

Ah... maybe.

Roger, if you called just to get
a quote, why is the guy here?

With a block of ice
and a chisel?

And two DJs, Roger. Really?
Two DJs?!

I don't hear you.

Baby, I'm gonna
have to call you back.

Oscar Ripley?

LAPD. We need to ta...

Oh...

- Dad?
- He's not gonna stop.

Roger, don't shoot!

Oscar, hit the brakes!

Dad, your room.

Don't worry, sweetie.
It's just a little mess,

- we'll clean it all up.
- Get your hands

- behind your back.
- Still gonna be the best Christmas ever.

Dad?

It's not just the room.

It's what was
in the room.

Tree, decorations.

I had these little
cute dancing elves.

You just wind 'em up,
and they're...

Not a single one survived.

Look, I-I'm sorry, man.

I truly am.
I panicked.

Not a good look
on an innocent man.

I heard about the burglary,
all right,

and I know
you saw me talking to Lewis.

I was worried that you would
think I was involved.

Guess what I think now.

Lewis offered me the
job, but I said no.

I got Sam to look after now.

Speaking of which...

Found this in your room.

Stolen from a home invasion
last week.

Oh, see, I bought that
off of Lewis.

I'm just trying
to give Sam a great Christmas,

especially since I've
missed so many already.

I'm not the guy
you're looking for, Wes.

Would you please tell Cole
that this is exactly the guy

that we're looking for,
and we want to go home?

Not me. I never
want to go home again.

Okay, Mr. Dark and Stormy,
what's going on?

- Cole told me that you and Todd cancelled your trip.
- Not cancelled.

- Todd's in Wyoming. You know, I don't want to talk about it.
- Perfect, because I don't like...

I mean, if he wants
to be apart

for the holidays,
we'll be apart.

Solo. Some people
find that peaceful.

They do. And that's
the right attitude. Relax.

All alone in a big, quiet,
empty house, room

after room of...

Okay, look, hey,
you want to come over early

and help me prep
for RJ's party?

Oh, God, please, yes.

Okay, yeah.

Can you let me go, man?

Like, just-just for tonight?
I promised Sam

that I-I'd take him
to the parade tomorrow

to meet Santa.

I can't.

Everything's pointing
to you right now.

Yeah.

Then can you do this?

Don't let Sam
go to some foster family,

not for Christmas, man.

♪♪ Hark! the herald... ♪♪

Why can't you get him out?
Dad, you know him.

- He's innocent.
- My dad promised.

He doesn't do the stuff
he did before.

- I believe him. It's just not enough to get him out of jail.
- Okay,

well, what would
be enough?

Well, we'd have
to find the burglar

who was at the scene
to prove it wasn't

Sam's dad, but that's
a long shot.

What about him?

He's the guy in the car
with my dad's friend yesterday.

While you were swimming?

There was somebody else
in the car with Lewis?

Yeah. We saw him when we
went in to grab snacks.

That looks a lot
like Santa, buddy.

It's not Santa, Dad.

We're 12.

You left out
the birthmark.

White beard, red cheeks

and a peanut-shaped
birthmark.

- Like this.
- Yeah. Just like that.

You said this was gonna be
the best Christmas ever.

Well, I don't want a tree
or wind-up dancing elves.

Find him.

Get Sam's dad out.

♪♪ Everybody knows ♪♪

♪♪ A man is supposed
to be so strong... ♪♪

All right,
just tell me.

I can tell
something's wrong.

Ever since
I lost the election,

Todd's disappointment
has been palpable.

- That does not sound like Todd.
- You'd be surprised.

Hey, hey, we're at party
in minus 50 minutes, people.

Can I get some help here?

Okay, Roger, Brooks
is in a crisis.

He needs someone to
listen to him right now.

Well, can we listen
while he dices onions?

It'll help mask his tears.

Roger!

That's probably the photo booth.

He... By the way,
he left early today to do this.

He did.

Ah. I had you down for
a "will not attend."

Plus zero, by the way.

Change of plans. Do you mind

if these guys
hang out here for a bit?

Uh, Murtaugh,

this is my best
friend Sam.

Hey, Sam.
Do you dice vegetables?

Honey. What?

I'm serious.

Maya, come on.
Bring your friend in.

Come on.

Thanks for helping my dad.

You got it.

Hey, Oscar's kid...
what did he mean?

He gave us a lead. Let's go.

I can't. I got a party.
I can't just go.

No problem. Why don't
you tell his kid, then?

I'm sure he'll understand.

All right. What's the lead?

That's not a lead.

That's a kid killing time
between French fries.

It's exactly what I thought

until I scoured about a
half-dozen mug books,

and I found this.
Calvin Marks.

Armed robbery, assault,

home invasion.

Plus, he shared a halfway
house with our DOA, Lewis.

Look at the birthmark.

Yeah.

- Okay, we got to be back here by 8:00, all right?
- Okay.

And I drive.
Let's go.

This is the last
known address.

Looks like nobody's
been here in forever.

Well, this thing
is bolted shut.

No one's getting
through that door tonight.

I have a pitch.

We come back tomorrow
with some warrants

and heavy machinery.

Hey, Tarzan, where you going?

Looking for another way in.

Hey, Roger,
do you believe in miracles?

Come on.
You've never heard of...

A fictional character. Get...

See you downstairs.

Come on down, Rog.

Piece of cake.

Roger, what's happening?

Piece of cake?

I'm stuck.

Get me out of here.

All right, all right,
settle down.

Come on!

Come on.

Maybe a piece of cake
was the problem.

All right, you stay right here.

I'll be right back, buddy.

I'm gonna get some, uh, cooking
spray or something slippery

to get you out of there.

Where you going?!
Don't leave me here!

Hey, Roger!

Oh, boy.

Oh! Cole!

Huh.

Cole,
where did they go?!

In a surprising turn of events,

it looks like
the front door opens after all.

You know you're not invited
to my party, right?

Roger.

We call the arraignmentjudge

at home and tell him
to spring Oscar

because we have
two better suspects.

Except we don't, do we?

No, I mean, technically,
we don't have them.

Technically, that's
what we need.

You have no... you have no
perps, you have no evidence.

We have a thumb.
A human thumb.

Right. The, uh,
missing digit,

which, even if you did have it,
would prove what, again?

I don't know.

But the wrong guy's in jail,
Captain. I'm sure of it.

You're probably right.

But without suspects
or evidence,

there is no way
he's getting released.

I'm sorry, Cole.
Merry Christmas.

We're gonna get him out.

But not tonight.

I did everything I could.

Well, it wasn't enough.

I promised Sam you would
get his Dad out by tomorrow.

Honey, why would
you promise him that?

Because I know what it's like

to not have your dad there
for Christmas.

I've done it my entire life,
and it sucks.

Maya.

Let her go.

This'll pass.

I don't even have a place
for her to sleep tonight.

Cole, come on.
You both will stay here.

You go back to the motel,
get some of your stuff.

She knows
you're doing your best.

Maybe.

Deep down, I know she's right.

It's not enough.

How's your body?

The one in the morgue.

The one you're...
piecing together.

Has...? You got an ID?

Uh, well, we're up to the waist,
so we know it's a male.

We should have all the DNA
by tomorrow.

Mm. Mm. Mm.

But, Cap, what do you think
about this?

The Gute and Scorsese...
she says

she's having fun
with him tonight.

Fun. With Scorsese.

It's easy
to misunderstand people.

Wait, what am I
misunderstanding?

We're flawed.

We make mistakes,

we push away
the people we love.

We're not talking
about Scorsese anymore, are we?

Todd wasn't disappointed in me.

I was disappointed in myself.

I think I've become
difficult to live with.

Okay, you know what?
I'm gonna get you some coffee.

That's probably a good idea.

- Hey.
- Hey.

- Uh, Dad, listen...
- You landed!

Huh? Well, listen,
you're a little late,

but you'll make up some time
on the freeway, right?

No, no, I'm-I'm still
in, uh, Costa Rica.

Say what? Come again?

Yeah, my-my, uh,

airline ticket got,
uh, messed up.

Just a technical glitch.

A glitch?
What kind of glitch?

Um, well, they had me...

on a flight for yesterday
and-and not today,

on account of the time zone.

Time zones? It's a
one-hour difference.

That's not technical.

It sounds like a human glitch,
one very specific human.

It's RJ.

Fool missed his flight.
This is so typical

- of him.
- Dad, I'm still on the phone.

Well, listen, it'll...
honey, it'll be fine.

When's the next flight out?

Maybe tomorrow, end of the week.

Um...

I'm not sure...
you know, flights are spotty.

Sp... You know what's spotty?
You're spotty!

And flaky!

That's the perfect country
for you.

Okay, i-it happens,
and you are not helping.

Yeah, it happens to
this kid, all the time.

We got 40 people downstairs.
What are we supposed

to tell them, you can't make it
to your own party?

A party? Wha... What party?

This is ridiculous.

Do I have to come down there
and fly you back myself?

Wha...? I didn't call you
to get yelled at.

Okay, give me the phone.

RJ, honey, why don't
you look into...

You know what?

You can't go
to another foreign country

until you can read the clock.

- Roger, stop it.
- I'm serious.

Look, if this is
how you're gonna be,

maybe I shouldn't
come back at all.

Oh. Well, it's a moot point now,
isn't it?

Because even if
you wanted to,

your flight left yesterday!

Hmm! Can you
believe that?

He hung up on me.

Oh. I can't believe
it took him that long.

You act like, somehow,
this is my fault.

Oh, there is
no somehow about it.

Why do you
always do that?

Why... do what?

Try to control him.

Give him no margin
for error.

RJ is an adult.

Well, then he needs
to act like one.

- Hmm.
- He forgets

to register his passport,

then he books the wrong
flight coming back home,

and now, to top it all off,
he's missing his party.

- His party?
- His party.

Hmm.

This is your party.

I wanted a nice
dinner with our son.

But I got
an ice sculpture

and 12 gallons of gazpacho.

They had a sale.

And why are you acting like

it's my fault that

- he missed his...
- Missed...

his flight, Roger.

That's all.

You have got to find
a new gear for him.

Because if you keep giving RJ
reasons not to come home...

he won't come home.

Come on, we're gonna be late.

Tomas said we decorate
the tree before dinner.

I'm excited, too.
I-I'll see you tomorrow.

We're leaving again, aren't we?

Indonesia.

They've asked me to cover
a separatist uprising.

This is good news.

We're gonna be living
on the beach.

When are we going?

They want me there
Christmas morning,

so, um...

we leave tonight.

Hey. We're gonna be
surfing at sunrise.

I don't care.

We're supposed to have Christmas
with Tomas's family.

I don't want to wake up
somewhere new.

So... you'll make
new friends.

You know how long it took me
to make these friends?

I don't want
to start over.

I know that this
is disappointing,

but you have to see
the bigger picture.

We have never seen Indonesia,

and it is gonna be awesome.

I promise.

What do I always tell you, huh?

Another adventure awaits.

Dude.

I went to the mat
for you, man, but...

owner's real mad
about the whole...

car-in-the-hotel thing.

He wants you audi.

He called you a chaos magnet.

Yeah. I get that.

I don't.

You didn't drive your car
into the wall.

You're the
victim here.

Super badass victim.

I mean...

no room at the inn?

On Christmas Eve?

What have we become?

Gus...

don't worry, I'll be fine.

Yeah, but...

where are you gonna go?

Another adventure awaits.

Hey. It's RJ's phone.
Say what's up and I'll hit you back.

Hey-hey!
RJ, listen, um...

I know I got a little
carried away last night.

May have scared you off
coming home.

I hope not.

I mean, you know, people book
the wrong flights all the time.

I'm sure it's a common mistake.

I just personally don't know
anybody that is dumb enough

to do something...
Wait, that's not what I meant.

Murtaugh, you got a second?

Yeah. How do you
delete a voice mail

that you sent to somebody?

You go to Costa Rica
and steal RJ's phone.

Come on.

You need to see this.

Geez.

Looks like a Manson family
jigsaw puzzle.

Exactly. You see,
this guy gets it.

No, do you notice
anything missing?

The day you
got stuck in a chimney.

I didn't get stuck.

I was descending slowly.

- It was a gentleman's entry.
- Yeah, well,

we all heard what Cole said
he found in a freezer.

His left thumb?

Okay, so, who is this guy?

No. No, no, no, no.
Get up. Up.

I don't even like people sitting on my
couch for extended periods of time.

Sorry, Captain.

I was up late working
on the Oscar case.

What are you doing here?

- It's Christmas.
- No, it's not.

Out there,
it's Christmas.

But in here, it's
just another day.

- Where is that holiday spirit?
- It's in Wyoming.

Well, I have something
that might cheer you up.

I had a little
breakthrough last night.

- Look at this.
- The home invasion file?

I read it. It's three
random victims.

An orthodontist,
a night janitor

and a commercial real estate
agent... no connection.

Wrong. All three of them
used the same parking garage

on Prospect Street.
Boom. Breakthrough.

Barely. That's probably where
the crew found their victims.

Let the garage management know
and go find another couch.

I feel like there's more
to it than that.

There's some kind of design
with these robberies.

I just can't put
my finger on it.

'Cause it's not
any finger.

It's your thumb.

- The body me and Gute just put together.
- It's missing a left thumb?

- Right.
- Well, then it can't be the same.

No, it is the left thumb.
I'm saying he's right.

But he...

- What are we doing?
- Okay, well,

who-whose finger is it?
W-Was it?

It's... is Dan Underwood.

- He managed the Global Initiative Currency Exchange on...
- Prospect Street.

Prospect and 3rd. It's the
biggest currency exchange

in the state.
During the holiday season,

we're talking three to four
million in vault cash.

Those two lunatics
from the cabin...

they're hitting that vault.

On Prospect and 3rd?

Could not have picked
a worse day to do it.

Ho, ho, ho!

Are you sure
this is okay?

100%. You're with me.

You were promised
a Christmas Day parade,

so you're getting
a Christmas Day parade.

Hey. It's RJ's phone.
Say what's up and I'll hit you back.

Hey, RJ.
Yeah, it's your dad.

Ignore the last
three messages.

Uh, just listen
to this one.

What-what I've been
trying to say is...

RJ, your dad's sorry,
he loves you,

he misses you like crazy,

and that's why he's
acting like a jackass.

Hey. Thanks.

I think.

Turns out
it's a whole lot easier

to apologize
to somebody else's kid.

Now, can we focus,
catch some bad guys?

Let's do it.

Huh.

Now, that doesn't
seem right, does it?

No, it doesn't.

Gentlemen.

What's in the bags?

Were we exchanging

some currency, maybe?

- Excuse me. Excuse me.
- Pardon me, excuse me.

I'll get that one.

LAPD, stop!

I said stop!

Dad?

Maya, what are you doing here?

Sam wanted to see
the parade, so we came.

Sam?

- Where is he?
- Um, he was just with me a second ago.

Sam!

Cole?

Hey, who are you? Let me go!

- Stay here. Don't move.
- Cole! Cole!

Hi! Merry Christmas.

Ooh!

Santa's got a gun!

He started it.

Cole, help! Cole, help!

Please, let me go!

Cole, help!

Come on, man.

- Let the kid go.
- Back off!

Sam, it's gonna be all right.

No one has to get hurt today.

You want the money? It's yours.

Okay? Just drop the gun.
We'll walk out of here.

You're gonna let me walk out?

- Just like that?
- Yeah.

Release the kid.
I give you my word.

You're full of crap, man!
Get on the ground.

Okay.

Sam...

do you trust me?

Close your eyes.

If you could be anywhere
in the world right now,

where would you be?

Hawaii, with my dad.

I said get on the ground!

On the ground, now.

You're in Hawaii.

You and your dad.

Kapalua Beach.

Bodysurfing in the waves.

Aah!

It's okay, buddy.

You're gonna be okay.

Want to go see your dad?

Thank you.

That was the A.D.A.

All charges were dropped
against Oscar.

- He just got released.
- Thank you, Captain.

- I appreciate you making that call.
- Of course.

Almost forgot.
This is for you.

What's this?

Well, it's definitely
not a Christmas gift.

Not in here, anyway.

Plane ticket?

To... Laramie, Wyoming.

Flight leaves in two hours.

Cole, you didn't
have to do this.

Ten years in the CIA,

I've got a truckload of
frequent-flier points.

- Really? So is there any chance we could...
- No. You're flying coach.

Okay, coach.
Coach is good.

For you.

Merry Christmas.

No!

You shouldn't have.

Nothing like finishing a puzzle.

Best feeling in the world.

Congratulations, weirdos.

Oh, I almost forgot.

Holiday cookies.

Okay, a thumb in a box?

- Yeah, that may have crossed a line.
- Tried to tell you.

Still, the guy's
got a lot going for him.

- Okay, and we're back to this.
- Come on, a coroner

who makes movies,
designs his own socks...

You know,
he wrote a book about hummus.

He made you read
the hummus book?

Also, he's really into you.

Forgot the cookies at home.

Oh, no. Do I have
something in my teeth?

Or my nose?
Please, tell me it's my teeth.

It's my teeth, right?

Seriously,
what are you looking at?

I have no idea.
Merry Christmas, Scorsese.

Hey, it's RJ's phone.

Say what's up
and I'll hit you back.

It keeps
going to voice mail.

You really think
I'm driving him away?

What I think is...

we need to let him grow up.

Make mistakes.
Get lost, get stuck.

Get hurt a little.

I know.

I just-I just love
that kid so much.

It-it kills me to see him fail.

I know it does, honey.

If it were up to you,
RJ wouldn't even know

how to ride a bike.

Why do we put kids

on bikes on the roads
next to cars?

- Right.
- They're like...

- death machines on two wheels.
- Death machines on two wheels.

- Yes.
- I know.

I love him, too.

And maybe I overstated myself

when I said you were
driving him away.

Hello? Anyone home?

Oh, my God!

RJ! I missed you so much.

Things have been
terrible without you.

Mom and Dad have just been
on me 24/7 because...

...because they're
awesome parents.

- Come here, give your mom a hug.
- Good to see you guys.

- Hug your mama.
- Look at you.

- Hey!
- Oh, oh, Ri, I got you a shirt.

- It's in my bag... if you bring it upstairs.
- Done.

Yay!

She falls for that every time.
You know that, right?

- Look at you.
- Yeah.

- Did you get bigger?
- I think he did get bigger.

- He got bigger. Look at you.
- He did get bigger. Oh.

- And how's the coffee business?
- Yeah.

- Oh, well, I'm done with that.
- Oh. - Okay.

- You know, moving on to something much bigger now. You ready?
- What?

Oh, okay.

Timeshares.

Huh?
Timeshares.

- Timeshare.
- Timeshare.

- Yeah.
- Son. No, no, no.

Let me stop you
right there.

The timeshares...
it's a Ponzi scheme.

- No one has ever made money...
- No, but I met a guy.

- What are you gonna do?
- He's, like, a timeshare guru...

- it's an investment.
- Guru? Invest?

- What, in time?
- We're back.

- How do you invest in timesharing?
- It's a, um...

So I say to the owner,

"You got to give my guy
a new room, or I walk.

"No more Gus cleaning up your
hotel messes. How you like

- them jingle bells?"
- Gus, thank you.

- We appreciate it.
- No worries, dude.

I got your back, Cole.
Semper fi.

Merry Christmas.

Merry Christmas to you guys.

Hey, Dad.

- Thanks.
- Don't thank me yet.

Our Christmas dinner
kind of got, uh...

- Run over?
- Yeah.

♪♪ The only words
that I could think of... ♪♪

Oh, I ordered these
pineapple butter jam cookies,

Indonesian delight.

Sounds good.

Not a single one survived.
All smushed to bits.

As was the Slovakian
beet horseradish sauce.

Sounds less good,

but the important thing
is that we're together.

Hey, that's my line.

♪♪ Just in time... ♪♪

Best Christmas ever.

♪♪ My memories... ♪♪

Best Christmas ever.

♪♪ Come to me ♪♪

♪♪ The remembrance of ♪♪

Put your bags down
and come on over here.

I thought we had
a flight to catch.

Wes, come on.

I know how hard this is for you.

I know it feels like
we don't have

what everybody else has.

But the truth is

as long as we're together,

we have something better.

Look.

All of those stars?

Those are our
Christmas lights.

We get to take them
wherever we go.

It's a big world, Wes,

and you and I get to see it all

and be at home anywhere in it.

♪♪ I've come in this way ♪♪

♪♪ And here now I'll stay ♪♪

♪♪ If the unknown ♪♪

♪♪ Have to wait ♪♪

♪♪ One more day ♪♪

- Hey.
- I know the party was last night,

but I thought we could help you
with some leftovers.

What do you think,
I'm the kind of guy

that miscalculates
the amount of food...

Oh, hey, Maya. Perfect timing.

We have, like,
14 pounds of ice cream cake.

Yeah, and it's melting,

so come on in.

- Thanks, Murtaugh.
- You're welcome.

You sure this is okay?
It's not a bad time?

Nah. I mean, RJ's back.

We think he gave his savings
to a South American grifter.

Trish has been on the phone
with Interpol all night,

and somehow it's all my fault.

Hmm, I hear you.

- Hey.
- Hey.

Yeah, that sounds kind of messy.

It is messy, but it's family.

And I wouldn't have it
any other way.

Thank you.

Perfect.
So, let's eat!