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1
00:00:02,266 --> 00:00:06,266
I cannot believe
my mother is having an affair.
2
00:00:06,300 --> 00:00:08,150
I'm having palpitations.
3
00:00:08,183 --> 00:00:11,833
I'm having palpitations.
4
00:00:11,116 --> 00:00:12,416
Darling, seeing a doctor
5
00:00:12,450 --> 00:00:15,430
does not necessarily mean
they're being intimate.
6
00:00:15,466 --> 00:00:19,426
Oh, please, when I see a man,
you don't think
I'm intimate with him?
7
00:00:19,466 --> 00:00:21,226
Not if he sees you.
8
00:00:24,400 --> 00:00:28,500
You know, sweetheart,
I went through the same thing
with my parents.
9
00:00:28,830 --> 00:00:30,160
It's totally
beyond your control.
10
00:00:30,500 --> 00:00:32,320
Why aren't you as shocked as me?
11
00:00:32,350 --> 00:00:35,300
Well, I'm, you know, European.
12
00:00:37,266 --> 00:00:42,116
Things are a little more
accepted there.
It's looser. It's freer.
13
00:00:42,150 --> 00:00:44,230
It's, uh, so wrong.
14
00:00:46,333 --> 00:00:48,283
Well, my mother is not European.
15
00:00:48,316 --> 00:00:50,416
She's a middle-aged Jewish yenta
16
00:00:50,450 --> 00:00:53,330
that should be going
to see a doctor
for intestinal problems.
17
00:00:53,366 --> 00:00:55,326
That I can believe.
18
00:00:55,366 --> 00:00:58,476
I just heard about the affair.
19
00:00:59,160 --> 00:01:04,150
Oh, don't worry, Franny,
your father's a very good man.
20
00:01:04,183 --> 00:01:08,333
Sylvia wouldn't throw that away
for some fling.
21
00:01:08,366 --> 00:01:11,296
Exactly. Yetta's
absolutely right.
22
00:01:11,333 --> 00:01:14,483
I'm sure this thing
with your mother
and her doctor won't last.
23
00:01:15,160 --> 00:01:17,100
My daughter's dating a doctor?
24
00:01:18,830 --> 00:01:19,660
Whoo-hoo.
25
00:01:27,116 --> 00:01:28,476
♪ She was workingIn a bridal shop ♪
26
00:01:29,160 --> 00:01:30,180
♪ In Flushing, Queens ♪
27
00:01:30,216 --> 00:01:31,346
♪ Till her boyfriendKicked her out ♪
28
00:01:31,383 --> 00:01:33,333
♪ In one of thoseCrushing scenes ♪
29
00:01:33,660 --> 00:01:35,000
♪ What was she to do?Where was she to go? ♪
30
00:01:35,330 --> 00:01:37,350
♪ She was out on her fanny ♪
31
00:01:37,383 --> 00:01:39,173
♪ So over the bridgeFrom Flushing ♪
32
00:01:39,200 --> 00:01:40,380
♪ To the Sheffield's door ♪
33
00:01:40,416 --> 00:01:43,216
♪ She was there to sellmake-upBut the father saw more ♪
34
00:01:43,250 --> 00:01:45,120
♪ She had style!She had flair!She was there ♪
35
00:01:45,150 --> 00:01:46,170
♪ That's how she became ♪
36
00:01:46,200 --> 00:01:49,330
♪ The Nanny ♪
37
00:01:49,660 --> 00:01:52,000
♪ Who would have guessedThat the girl we described ♪
38
00:01:52,330 --> 00:01:54,200
♪ Was just exactlyWhat the doctor prescribed? ♪
39
00:01:54,233 --> 00:01:55,353
♪ Now, the fatherFinds her beguiling ♪
40
00:01:55,383 --> 00:01:56,483
♪ Watch out C.C. ♪
41
00:01:57,160 --> 00:01:58,370
♪ And the kidsAre actually smiling ♪
42
00:01:58,400 --> 00:01:59,380
♪ Such joie de vivre ♪
43
00:01:59,416 --> 00:02:01,826
♪ She's the lady in red ♪
44
00:02:01,116 --> 00:02:04,656
♪ When everybody elseIs wearing tan ♪
45
00:02:05,233 --> 00:02:07,503
♪ The flashy girlFrom Flushing ♪
46
00:02:07,830 --> 00:02:08,350
♪ The Nanny named Fran! ♪
47
00:02:15,166 --> 00:02:16,376
Oh, doctor...
48
00:02:18,383 --> 00:02:22,203
I am so flattered, but I have to
tell you the truth.
49
00:02:22,233 --> 00:02:24,273
I am wearing a little makeup.
50
00:02:26,466 --> 00:02:28,156
No.
51
00:02:29,416 --> 00:02:32,126
You've changed your hair,
haven't you?
52
00:02:32,166 --> 00:02:34,096
Did it get lighter from the sun?
53
00:02:34,133 --> 00:02:35,373
Yeah, the sun.
54
00:02:37,116 --> 00:02:40,366
You know, I notice every little
thing about you.
55
00:02:41,316 --> 00:02:43,316
Including how much you love...
56
00:02:44,200 --> 00:02:46,180
Oh, my God!
57
00:02:46,216 --> 00:02:47,316
Samples!
58
00:02:50,383 --> 00:02:52,433
Cotton swabs!
59
00:02:52,466 --> 00:02:54,216
Oh, Handi Wipes.
60
00:02:55,316 --> 00:02:58,166
Antibacterial ointment.
61
00:02:59,233 --> 00:03:02,233
Oh, you are so extravagant.
62
00:03:04,500 --> 00:03:07,100
You know, my daughter is giving
me the third degree about you.
63
00:03:08,830 --> 00:03:11,660
Hmm. She can't wait to meet you.
64
00:03:12,200 --> 00:03:14,320
Are your kids doing the same
about me?
65
00:03:14,350 --> 00:03:18,160
Oh, no.
My daughters respect my privacy.
66
00:03:18,500 --> 00:03:22,830
They know that when I'm ready
I'll introduce you.
67
00:03:22,116 --> 00:03:26,326
They would never intrude
in my private life.
68
00:03:27,250 --> 00:03:28,400
So, Miss Blodgett,
69
00:03:32,300 --> 00:03:34,150
what are your symptoms?
70
00:03:34,183 --> 00:03:36,133
Well, I'm sick and I'm nauseous.
71
00:03:36,166 --> 00:03:39,346
I think I had some bad Italian
at an affair.
72
00:03:42,133 --> 00:03:43,183
Uh-huh.
73
00:03:45,160 --> 00:03:48,480
-Well, let's try
your reflexes first.
-Okay.
74
00:03:52,330 --> 00:03:55,150
Sorry. You know how weird
those nerve connections can be.
75
00:03:56,333 --> 00:03:57,323
Um...
76
00:03:58,283 --> 00:04:00,273
I'm gonna look in your ear.
77
00:04:00,300 --> 00:04:02,160
Do I need to put on a cup?
78
00:04:03,150 --> 00:04:04,280
[chuckles]
79
00:04:06,150 --> 00:04:09,330
-Is that your family over there?
-Yeah.
80
00:04:09,366 --> 00:04:12,466
-You have a lovely wife.
-I did.
81
00:04:13,000 --> 00:04:14,170
I lost her nine years ago.
82
00:04:15,200 --> 00:04:18,150
Oh, I'm so sorry.
83
00:04:18,183 --> 00:04:21,503
Wow, did I say nine years?
84
00:04:21,830 --> 00:04:22,450
I can't believe
it's been that long.
85
00:04:25,166 --> 00:04:27,296
This picture we took
on our last anniversary.
86
00:04:27,333 --> 00:04:29,123
We went to Hawaii.
87
00:04:29,150 --> 00:04:32,250
Oh, yeah, it was so dark
and you were so tan.
88
00:04:32,283 --> 00:04:33,383
That's Don Ho.
89
00:04:39,000 --> 00:04:42,660
Your wife was very beautiful.
90
00:04:42,100 --> 00:04:44,330
-She was, wasn't she?
-Yeah.
91
00:04:45,160 --> 00:04:46,270
You know what you miss the most?
92
00:04:46,300 --> 00:04:48,100
The little things.
93
00:04:48,133 --> 00:04:50,663
Her perfume, her laugh.
94
00:04:51,333 --> 00:04:54,433
The look on her face
whenever I would surprise her...
95
00:04:54,466 --> 00:04:57,376
with tickets
for a Sunday matinee.
96
00:04:57,416 --> 00:05:00,396
You mean, you didn't spend
your Sundays
sitting in front of the TV
97
00:05:00,433 --> 00:05:03,103
spitting out peanut shells
watching the football game?
98
00:05:04,200 --> 00:05:06,500
My wife hated sports.
99
00:05:06,830 --> 00:05:07,170
So I gave them up.
100
00:05:11,383 --> 00:05:14,273
If you didn't wanna direct
my school play,
why did you say yes?
101
00:05:14,300 --> 00:05:16,270
Because you asked me
before they were married
and pregnant,
102
00:05:16,300 --> 00:05:18,220
and I thought I still had a shot
with your daddy.
103
00:05:19,383 --> 00:05:22,403
Maxwell, will you tell her
the director is god?
104
00:05:22,433 --> 00:05:25,103
She's rehearsing us
until two in the morning.
105
00:05:25,133 --> 00:05:27,333
It's because you stink.
106
00:05:27,366 --> 00:05:30,476
C.C., what do you expect when
you choose Antony and Cleopatra
107
00:05:31,160 --> 00:05:32,200
for a grammar school?
108
00:05:32,233 --> 00:05:34,353
How hard is it to play
a pushy broad
109
00:05:34,383 --> 00:05:36,453
who runs around half naked
with too much makeup?
110
00:05:36,483 --> 00:05:39,133
Have you learned nothing
from your mother?
111
00:05:40,166 --> 00:05:42,116
[phone rings]
112
00:05:42,150 --> 00:05:44,280
You're all off script tomorrow,
or you're out.
113
00:05:44,316 --> 00:05:45,316
Talk.
114
00:05:46,266 --> 00:05:50,496
-Help me.
-Oh, sweetheart.
115
00:05:50,830 --> 00:05:52,180
You open Saturday
and you're still not off script?
116
00:05:53,266 --> 00:05:54,996
All right.
117
00:05:55,330 --> 00:05:56,450
Well, this is just great.
118
00:05:56,483 --> 00:06:00,303
The kid playing the messenger
is grounded for cheating.
119
00:06:00,333 --> 00:06:05,233
All I did was slip him a few
answers so he could get
to rehearsal on time.
120
00:06:05,266 --> 00:06:07,426
C.C., can't you just cast
some other kid in the part?
121
00:06:07,466 --> 00:06:09,216
Who? He was perfect.
122
00:06:09,250 --> 00:06:13,100
He looked like
a weak, tired old man
beaten down by life.
123
00:06:13,133 --> 00:06:15,203
Who am I gonna find
to play a part like that?
124
00:06:23,266 --> 00:06:24,266
What?
125
00:06:26,216 --> 00:06:29,296
Maxwell, wouldn't Niles be
perfect
126
00:06:29,333 --> 00:06:31,303
for that part
in our sitcom in L.A.?
127
00:06:32,233 --> 00:06:35,403
Me? What part?
128
00:06:35,433 --> 00:06:39,353
Oh, if only there were a way
I could see him on stage first.
129
00:06:39,383 --> 00:06:41,483
Me? What part?
130
00:06:44,266 --> 00:06:46,326
C.C., I don't think
this is a very good idea.
131
00:06:46,366 --> 00:06:48,466
Oh, you're always trying
to hold me back.
132
00:06:49,000 --> 00:06:51,270
You're just terrified
that people are gonna find out
133
00:06:51,300 --> 00:06:53,380
that someone in this house
has more talent than you.
134
00:06:57,233 --> 00:06:59,133
You know what? Break a leg.
135
00:07:03,450 --> 00:07:08,330
Oh, honey, we are
in so much trouble.
136
00:07:08,660 --> 00:07:09,480
This guy that Ma is seeing,
137
00:07:10,160 --> 00:07:13,170
he's handsome, he's romantic,
he's a doctor.
138
00:07:13,200 --> 00:07:14,480
He could park wherever he wants.
139
00:07:17,330 --> 00:07:20,150
Daddy would have an affair
with him.
140
00:07:20,183 --> 00:07:23,423
Sweetheart, are you sure
your mother isn't just
going through a phase?
141
00:07:23,450 --> 00:07:27,220
I would like a word in private
with Miss Blodgett, please.
142
00:07:29,350 --> 00:07:32,270
How dare you interfere
with my affairs?
143
00:07:32,300 --> 00:07:35,150
Affairs?
How many you having, Ma?
144
00:07:36,300 --> 00:07:38,220
Why are you doing this to me?
145
00:07:38,250 --> 00:07:41,500
I have never interfered
in your personal life.
146
00:07:41,830 --> 00:07:43,130
Oh, please!
147
00:07:43,166 --> 00:07:46,176
Let there be a witness.
No one will believe this.
148
00:07:46,216 --> 00:07:49,656
Ma, how could you
do this to Daddy?
149
00:07:49,100 --> 00:07:51,300
Don't you realize
how much he loves you?
150
00:07:51,333 --> 00:07:56,283
Darling, the only time
your father looks at me
with desire in his eyes
151
00:07:56,316 --> 00:07:58,246
is when I'm holding a chicken.
152
00:08:01,500 --> 00:08:03,100
You know what he gave me
for my birthday?
153
00:08:03,133 --> 00:08:06,123
A standing rotisserie
that drips the fat off.
154
00:08:07,100 --> 00:08:08,420
Is that stupid or what?
155
00:08:09,450 --> 00:08:11,500
I thought you'd like it.
156
00:08:13,150 --> 00:08:16,000
Fran, your father doesn't
talk to me anymore.
157
00:08:16,330 --> 00:08:18,130
If at least he fought with me,
that's life.
158
00:08:18,166 --> 00:08:20,996
But indifference,
I can't live with that.
159
00:08:21,330 --> 00:08:24,500
But, Ma,
if you and Daddy have problems,
160
00:08:24,830 --> 00:08:26,370
why don't you go see
a professional?
161
00:08:26,400 --> 00:08:27,480
I am.
162
00:08:29,316 --> 00:08:32,126
Fran, you're my daughter
and I love you,
163
00:08:32,166 --> 00:08:35,396
but you have no idea
what I'm going through.
164
00:08:35,433 --> 00:08:39,453
Ma, I'm sorry, but I cannot
and I will not accept this.
165
00:08:39,483 --> 00:08:43,373
Then you and I
no longer have anything left
to say to each other.
166
00:08:45,150 --> 00:08:48,350
Oh, yes, there is.
167
00:08:48,383 --> 00:08:52,153
That fatless rotisserie
was a great gift!
168
00:08:54,283 --> 00:08:58,173
-Well, what happened?
-I just broke up with my mother.
169
00:09:03,250 --> 00:09:06,330
You know, I'm very impressed
with how you're handling
170
00:09:06,660 --> 00:09:08,230
the fact that your mother
decided to show up.
171
00:09:08,266 --> 00:09:11,996
Well, honey,
I'm a big enough person
to set my differences aside.
172
00:09:12,330 --> 00:09:14,170
Today's day is all about Gracie.
173
00:09:15,366 --> 00:09:17,826
[fanfare playing]
174
00:09:19,250 --> 00:09:23,660
Tell me, messenger,
what news bring you from Caesar?
175
00:09:33,100 --> 00:09:38,470
Tell her that she is
not going out for Chinese
with us after.
176
00:09:39,000 --> 00:09:43,660
Tell her that I would be happy
to get it to go.
177
00:09:43,100 --> 00:09:45,400
Would you two be quiet?
My son is in this play, too.
178
00:09:45,433 --> 00:09:48,163
Big deal. What is he playing?
The camel?
179
00:09:49,830 --> 00:09:51,200
And don't you yell
at my daughter.
180
00:09:51,233 --> 00:09:53,403
She's pregnant
with my new grandchildren.
181
00:09:53,433 --> 00:09:54,403
Yeah.
182
00:09:55,333 --> 00:09:56,383
Yeah.
183
00:09:59,200 --> 00:10:03,100
Tell her that when her
morning sickness kicks in
184
00:10:03,133 --> 00:10:05,423
a little warm seltzer
would help.
185
00:10:05,450 --> 00:10:07,480
-Oh, my mother always said...
-Tell her!
186
00:10:10,116 --> 00:10:12,116
Warm seltzer helps.
187
00:10:13,830 --> 00:10:15,100
Tell her thank you.
188
00:10:16,316 --> 00:10:21,376
I ask you, messenger,
what news bring you from Caesar?
189
00:10:31,160 --> 00:10:33,120
That big kid stinks.
190
00:10:41,330 --> 00:10:45,270
Oh, there's my adorable husband.
191
00:10:45,300 --> 00:10:49,430
You know, honey, I am so glad
that you set up your office
here at the house.
192
00:10:49,466 --> 00:10:54,226
[Maxwell]Well, she made upwith her mother, so now she'sgonna nudge the father.
193
00:10:54,266 --> 00:10:58,146
So if I don't get out of heresoon, she's gonna askme to do something.
194
00:10:58,183 --> 00:11:00,353
Ooh, I'll make up a meeting.
195
00:11:00,383 --> 00:11:03,203
...a wonderful husband you are.
So, what do you say?
196
00:11:03,233 --> 00:11:05,503
Will you stick around
and help me out with Daddy?
197
00:11:05,830 --> 00:11:08,320
Oh, sweetheart, I'm so sorry.
I'm afraid I have a meeting.
198
00:11:08,350 --> 00:11:12,150
Oh, uh, you know, they called
and canceled that meeting.
199
00:11:18,200 --> 00:11:22,450
Oh. Oh, well, in that case,
I'm free as a bird.
200
00:11:22,483 --> 00:11:25,123
She canceled my fake meeting.
201
00:11:29,166 --> 00:11:32,496
I'll get it. I'll get it.
202
00:11:35,150 --> 00:11:38,170
-Hi, Daddy.
-Hello, sweetheart.
203
00:11:44,450 --> 00:11:46,130
What's in the bag?
204
00:11:46,166 --> 00:11:47,996
Hey, I'm no idiot.
205
00:11:48,330 --> 00:11:50,230
There's a lot of thieves
out there that want these.
206
00:11:52,330 --> 00:11:54,370
Daddy, they don't even want
the car.
207
00:11:54,400 --> 00:11:56,130
Come, sit down.
208
00:11:56,166 --> 00:11:58,196
-Hey, you're looking
pretty good, kiddo.
-Thank you.
209
00:11:58,233 --> 00:12:00,473
So, what's up?
You invite Daddy to brunch,
210
00:12:01,000 --> 00:12:02,150
you got something
on your mind, huh?
211
00:12:02,183 --> 00:12:03,433
Something bothering you?
I can always tell.
212
00:12:03,466 --> 00:12:05,346
Come on, sit on Daddy's lap,
and tell me all about it.
213
00:12:05,383 --> 00:12:09,503
-Come on. Tell me all about it.
-Daddy. Daddy,
Dad, I'm pregnant.
214
00:12:09,830 --> 00:12:10,270
Daddy, Daddy.
215
00:12:11,200 --> 00:12:12,470
Well, you know, this weekend
216
00:12:13,000 --> 00:12:15,470
is yours and Mommy's
40th wedding anniversary.
217
00:12:16,000 --> 00:12:17,450
-Yeah.
-And I was just thinking
218
00:12:17,483 --> 00:12:22,153
maybe the four of us could
go out for dinner and dancing
at the Skylight Room.
219
00:12:22,183 --> 00:12:25,503
What would I do there?
I wouldn't know what to do
in a place like that.
220
00:12:25,830 --> 00:12:26,160
I don't fit in there.
221
00:12:26,500 --> 00:12:27,380
Sure you do, Daddy.
222
00:12:27,416 --> 00:12:30,176
You're eating the paper
off the muffin.
223
00:12:35,233 --> 00:12:36,323
Plus...
224
00:12:38,000 --> 00:12:40,270
you would make Mommy very happy
225
00:12:40,300 --> 00:12:43,330
and you wouldn't even
have to buy her a gift
226
00:12:43,660 --> 00:12:45,320
because you can give her
like a real fantasy night.
227
00:12:45,350 --> 00:12:49,150
Hey, hey, hey, wait a minute.
We don't get into
that kinky stuff.
228
00:12:51,466 --> 00:12:54,226
One time we ate cheesecake
off each other in bed.
229
00:12:54,266 --> 00:12:56,446
But, that's only
because nobody wanted
to get up for a napkin.
230
00:13:04,233 --> 00:13:08,103
I'm talking about being
debonair, romantic.
231
00:13:08,133 --> 00:13:11,133
Send her flowers. Fawn over her.
232
00:13:11,166 --> 00:13:13,316
Are you crazy?
If I sent your mother flowers
for no reason,
233
00:13:13,350 --> 00:13:14,480
she'd think I'm fooling around.
234
00:13:16,416 --> 00:13:20,226
Daddy, take the risk.
235
00:13:20,266 --> 00:13:24,826
I think Mommy's feeling
just a little bit
underappreciated.
236
00:13:24,116 --> 00:13:27,656
Oh, you're talking crazy talk.
Your mother's
a very happy woman.
237
00:13:27,100 --> 00:13:28,320
She's not, Dad.
238
00:13:28,350 --> 00:13:31,270
Bringing home a case
of Heinz vegetarian beans
239
00:13:31,300 --> 00:13:33,660
does not a happy woman make.
240
00:13:34,283 --> 00:13:36,303
Franny, come on. You don't know
what you're talking about.
241
00:13:36,333 --> 00:13:39,353
Dad, she was over here.
She talked to me.
242
00:13:40,183 --> 00:13:42,233
She's not happy.
243
00:13:42,266 --> 00:13:44,146
Did she mention the beans
specifically?
244
00:13:49,300 --> 00:13:51,380
Would you genug
with the beans, already?
245
00:13:51,416 --> 00:13:53,126
You're gonna lose her, Pop.
246
00:13:53,166 --> 00:13:55,116
I mean, if you don't smarten up,
247
00:13:55,150 --> 00:13:57,180
you are gonna end up spending
the rest of your life
without her.
248
00:13:57,216 --> 00:13:58,296
Now, is that what you want?
249
00:13:58,333 --> 00:14:00,403
No, of course not.
I mean, we're a team.
250
00:14:00,433 --> 00:14:02,473
Morty and Sylvia.
We belong together.
251
00:14:03,000 --> 00:14:05,330
All right. Well, then here's
what you're gonna do.
252
00:14:05,660 --> 00:14:07,660
You're gonna go out with us
to the restaurant.
253
00:14:07,100 --> 00:14:10,480
We're gonna celebrate
your anniversary, and you are
gonna romance your wife.
254
00:14:11,160 --> 00:14:13,450
Okay. You got a deal.
Just let me know when,
that's all.
255
00:14:13,483 --> 00:14:16,323
It's Saturday night.
256
00:14:16,350 --> 00:14:18,400
Saturday? Hey.
The Islanders are playing.
257
00:14:18,433 --> 00:14:20,833
[Fran] Daddy!
258
00:14:20,116 --> 00:14:22,176
All right, all right.
I'll tape, I'll tape, I'll tape.
259
00:14:25,483 --> 00:14:28,333
-Hello.
-Hello.
260
00:14:28,660 --> 00:14:29,470
Heard you laid
a big egg last night.
261
00:14:36,183 --> 00:14:38,203
[slow music playing]
262
00:14:56,250 --> 00:15:00,430
Oh, this place is so romantic.
Isn't it, Daddy?
263
00:15:00,466 --> 00:15:04,196
Huh? Yeah. Oh, yeah. Sure, sure.
264
00:15:04,233 --> 00:15:07,403
Sylvia, how about--?
How about I order
a skirt steak for two?
265
00:15:09,216 --> 00:15:13,116
Morty, this is
a fancy restaurant.
They don't have skirt steak.
266
00:15:13,150 --> 00:15:15,830
I'd like a Beef Ellington.
267
00:15:17,333 --> 00:15:19,403
Oh, God, they're talking
about skirt steaks.
268
00:15:19,433 --> 00:15:21,833
How embarrassing.
269
00:15:21,116 --> 00:15:23,376
Just order Beef Ellington
for the table.
270
00:15:25,233 --> 00:15:28,423
Say, Morty,
I bet every man in the place
271
00:15:28,450 --> 00:15:31,130
wishes he could change places
with us right now.
272
00:15:31,166 --> 00:15:32,226
Why?
273
00:15:34,100 --> 00:15:36,330
I'm sitting under a vent here.
It's blowing on me.
274
00:15:37,200 --> 00:15:38,280
Sylvia, you wanna switch?
275
00:15:38,316 --> 00:15:40,246
Daddy!
276
00:15:40,283 --> 00:15:41,473
What? What?
277
00:15:42,000 --> 00:15:44,830
Your mother's got hot flashes.
She'd like a breeze.
278
00:15:46,233 --> 00:15:49,003
Besides, I want
the most beautiful woman
in this restaurant
279
00:15:49,330 --> 00:15:50,500
to be comfortable.
280
00:15:50,400 --> 00:15:51,450
What?
281
00:15:53,150 --> 00:15:54,450
I'm trying to be nice.
282
00:15:54,483 --> 00:15:57,153
Well, cut it out.
It's unsettling.
283
00:15:59,500 --> 00:16:01,660
Sylvia, I'm trying
to treat you special.
284
00:16:01,100 --> 00:16:03,430
-Why now all of a sudden?
-Because--
285
00:16:04,466 --> 00:16:06,276
Because she said I should.
286
00:16:09,183 --> 00:16:12,663
Franny, this is no good.
This isn't me.
I'm not comfortable.
287
00:16:12,100 --> 00:16:13,280
I gotta get out of here.
288
00:16:16,166 --> 00:16:19,466
-Did you say something
to your father?
-No.
289
00:16:20,483 --> 00:16:22,663
He did.
290
00:16:27,400 --> 00:16:29,330
[whistling]
291
00:16:37,416 --> 00:16:40,426
Daddy, Daddy, come out here.
I need to talk to you.
292
00:16:40,466 --> 00:16:43,496
Oh, excuse me.
Oh, your fly's open, sir.
293
00:16:44,366 --> 00:16:47,656
Daddy, I have to talk to you.
294
00:16:47,100 --> 00:16:49,320
Oh, my God.
295
00:16:49,350 --> 00:16:52,130
What are you doing here?
296
00:16:52,166 --> 00:16:53,466
-I was just walking by.
-You know each other?
297
00:16:54,000 --> 00:16:56,300
Yes. This is the doctor
that Mommy's been seeing
298
00:16:56,333 --> 00:17:00,103
uh, because she's got,
you know, that...
299
00:17:00,133 --> 00:17:02,333
-that, she's got--
-Carpal tunnel syndrome.
300
00:17:02,366 --> 00:17:04,446
Carpal tunnel syndrome.
Carpal tunnel syndrome.
301
00:17:04,483 --> 00:17:08,273
Daddy, who's been married
to my mother for 40 years,
this is Dr. Razzo.
302
00:17:08,300 --> 00:17:10,500
-How do you do?
-What do you say?
303
00:17:10,830 --> 00:17:11,320
Hey, look. Look, Franny,
304
00:17:11,350 --> 00:17:14,370
I'm sorry that your
mother's upset with me.
I really am.
305
00:17:14,400 --> 00:17:18,330
Look, I'm just not
the kind of guy she needs
or wants anymore.
306
00:17:18,660 --> 00:17:20,660
Your mother's at the point
of her life, I think...
307
00:17:20,100 --> 00:17:22,330
Your mother needs
somebody like--
308
00:17:22,660 --> 00:17:23,400
Somebody like a guy like this.
309
00:17:23,433 --> 00:17:26,453
No, she doesn't. She does not.
310
00:17:28,100 --> 00:17:29,430
Dad, don't you love Mommy?
311
00:17:29,466 --> 00:17:32,496
Of course I love Sylvia.
I'm crazy about her.
312
00:17:32,830 --> 00:17:34,830
So look, I forget things
once in awhile.
313
00:17:34,116 --> 00:17:35,466
I forget things like birthdays.
314
00:17:36,000 --> 00:17:38,380
I forget to talk to her
during the commercial.
315
00:17:38,416 --> 00:17:41,496
But she's got to know
how much I care about her.
316
00:17:41,830 --> 00:17:44,420
Daddy-- And I meant him.
317
00:17:44,450 --> 00:17:47,350
How is she going to know
if you don't tell her?
318
00:17:47,383 --> 00:17:50,503
You are gonna lose her,
you know?
319
00:17:50,830 --> 00:17:51,400
Some other guy could come along.
320
00:17:51,433 --> 00:17:54,373
You know, I think that you guys
have exceeded the amount of time
321
00:17:54,400 --> 00:17:56,100
two men should stay
in a men's room.
322
00:17:56,133 --> 00:17:58,123
No, no, no. Let him finish.
Go ahead.
323
00:17:58,150 --> 00:18:01,320
Some other guy could come along
and tell Sylvia...
324
00:18:06,150 --> 00:18:10,220
all the things
she really wants to hear
from you.
325
00:18:14,000 --> 00:18:15,220
Come on, Daddy.
326
00:18:21,000 --> 00:18:23,430
Oh, thank you.
Thank you so much.
327
00:18:23,466 --> 00:18:26,296
I know you don't see this
right now, but trust me,
328
00:18:26,333 --> 00:18:29,253
someday you'll thank me
for this.
329
00:18:42,100 --> 00:18:43,170
Sylvia.
330
00:18:46,283 --> 00:18:48,173
Sylvia, I don't wanna lose you.
331
00:18:51,383 --> 00:18:55,423
I'm sorry if I didn't do
or say the things that...
332
00:18:55,450 --> 00:18:59,370
made you feel like you
were appreciated. I'm sorry.
333
00:18:59,400 --> 00:19:03,120
I don't know where the hell
our 40 years have gone.
334
00:19:03,150 --> 00:19:07,130
I look at you and I see a sweet
little 16-year-old girl...
335
00:19:08,316 --> 00:19:10,316
behind the candy counter
at Woolworths.
336
00:19:12,400 --> 00:19:15,370
You're wearing
a pale blue dress.
337
00:19:15,400 --> 00:19:18,000
And you're eating
that chocolate-covered cherry
338
00:19:18,330 --> 00:19:19,450
with the juice
dripping down your mouth.
339
00:19:21,500 --> 00:19:23,000
It was marzipan.
340
00:19:24,400 --> 00:19:26,330
You remember my blue dress?
341
00:19:27,350 --> 00:19:29,170
I remember
a lot of things, Sylvia.
342
00:19:31,160 --> 00:19:34,300
I just don't know
why you don't know how I feel.
343
00:19:34,333 --> 00:19:37,233
I'll tell you now, Sylvia. I--
344
00:19:38,433 --> 00:19:40,453
Oh, God, I love you.
345
00:19:44,416 --> 00:19:48,146
Morty, I love you too. I just--
346
00:19:49,216 --> 00:19:51,996
I just don't feel
special anymore.
347
00:19:53,200 --> 00:19:55,160
Our life is like...
348
00:19:58,150 --> 00:20:01,500
There are no surprises anymore.
349
00:20:04,433 --> 00:20:06,123
No surprises, huh?
350
00:20:07,450 --> 00:20:09,660
You want a surprise?
351
00:20:10,450 --> 00:20:12,280
I'll give you a surprise.
352
00:20:16,500 --> 00:20:17,420
♪ The very thought of you ♪
353
00:20:19,133 --> 00:20:21,403
♪ And I forget to do ♪
354
00:20:21,433 --> 00:20:23,453
♪ The little ordinary things ♪
355
00:20:23,483 --> 00:20:27,333
♪ That everyone ought to do ♪
356
00:20:28,283 --> 00:20:33,503
♪ I see your faceIn every flower ♪
357
00:20:33,830 --> 00:20:36,450
♪ Your eyes in stars above ♪
358
00:20:38,333 --> 00:20:41,183
♪ It's justThe thought of you ♪
359
00:20:42,266 --> 00:20:44,346
♪ The very thought of you ♪
360
00:20:45,483 --> 00:20:50,203
♪ My love ♪
361
00:20:58,300 --> 00:21:01,250
Well, I don't think you have to
worry about your mother
362
00:21:01,283 --> 00:21:03,153
leaving your father anymore.
363
00:21:05,333 --> 00:21:07,163
What?
364
00:21:07,500 --> 00:21:09,330
Why don't you ever sing to me?
365
00:21:11,233 --> 00:21:13,253
[slow music playing]
366
00:21:38,216 --> 00:21:39,416
[groans]
367
00:21:44,233 --> 00:21:48,273
You got a lousy review
in a grammar school news flyer.
368
00:21:49,133 --> 00:21:50,323
Get over it.
369
00:21:53,333 --> 00:21:56,153
Do you think my British accent
sounds fake?
370
00:21:59,466 --> 00:22:01,476
[theme music playing]
371
00:22:16,483 --> 00:22:19,003
[theme music ends]
27466
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