All language subtitles for the.resident.s05e04.1080p.web.h264-cakes_Track03

-Previously on The Resident...
-Why are you here?

-I'm not here to see you.
-I know this is hard,

but I can't have you
in my life right now.

What's your beef
with Dr. Sutton?

She's my mother.
She gave birth to me

and then wanted nothing
to do with me.

The defining experience
in your life is abandonment.

MAN: Conrad Hawkins,
there's been an accident.

HARVEY: Nicolette Nevin.
Single-car collision.

Significant intrusion
on the driver's side.

Her brain is herniating.

BILLIE: Nic won't recover
from this, Conrad.

♪

MARSHALL:
Open the tunnel.

-Open the tunnel.
Oh, there it is.
-(GiGi squeals happily)

(Marshall chuckles)

Hey.

Hold still.

You know, you've been visiting
the crash site

every morning
for the past two weeks.

(sighs)

You never come home
feeling better or...

more informed
than when you left.

I'm just wondering

if this might be doing you
more harm than good.

Just something
I need to do, Dad.

There had to have been a
medical cause for the accident.

Cops believe she was alone
on the road.

It wasn't dark.

No skid marks.

She could have fallen asleep.

Nah, unlikely.
When she was driving,

she always had a thermos
of coffee with her.

It was her thing.

Maybe she was texting.

She wouldn't do that.

The car could have caused her
to swerve.

Kid on a bike.

Deer. Raccoon. Who knows?

Whenever we went on trips,
she always wanted to drive.

She hated the way I drove.

She was a great driver.

Just doesn't make sense.

I know the answer's
in her medical records.

I know.

I, uh, think I'm gonna take GiGi
to the park.

(frustrated grunt)

Let ball, please.

Let's take a minute?

(panting)

You know, Dr. Devi showed me
a real slick way

to tack down hernia mesh
laparoscopically.

The intern Devi?

Have you managed to get Kit Voss
into bed yet?

Next question, Dr. Kranepool.

You're taking instruction
from children, for God's sakes.

You can't close on the boss.

I showed you how to be

an unrelenting master
of the universe.

-The hell happened?
-Serve the ball, tough guy.

They see your confidence
is gone, it's over.

Yeah, well, my universe is a
little smaller than it once was,

but my confidence...

is fine.

(chuckles)

-(pager beeping)
-(groans)

(panting):
Eh...

Yeah, I'm needed in the OR.

We'll finish this up tonight,

-if you're not too bushed.
-(chuckles)

KRANEPOOL: Now, with all
the fibrous tissue removed,

what is
the critical anatomical region

we're looking at, Dr. Devi?

-The hepatocystic triangle.
-Good.

Now, zoom in with the camera.

More.

Until I tell you to stop,
Doctor.

Yes. Finally.

That's good.

Could you talk me
through the advantages

of operating at such a high
magnification, Dr. Kranepool?

I've only read
that the field of view

should be kept at a wide angle.

Well, if you're lucky, you'll
reach a point in your career

where you don't need books
to remind you

of basic anatomy--
though I have my doubts.

I know the location
of every structure

in and out
of my field of vision.

LEELA: Blood keeps pooling,
and the source is outside

-of our field of vision.
I'm zooming out, Doctor.

-Do not zoom out!
Point the camera inferior

More.

Now to the right.

-I'm losing orientation, Doctor.
-Then suction faster.

LEELA:
I have to pull back.
I can't see anything.

KRANEPOOL:
My way or the highway,
Dr. Snowflake.

ANESTHESIOLOGIST:
BP's falling.

JESSICA:
Good save, Dr. Devi.

If you'd still like
to widen your view, Doctor,

feel free to watch
from the hallway.

TREVOR:
Hey, thanks for meeting me.

-Why did you call me?
-Something you said to me

keeps coming back.

-Yeah? What?
-I'm not interested

in that cliché-filled lecture
you're itching to deliver

about bad choices
and unmet potential served up...

You are dangerously close

to putting me off of
my favorite breakfast burrito.

The defining experience
of my life is abandonment.

That's what you said.

You disagree?

I don't think that's true.

Let me help you out.

Do you surround yourself
with lower companions?

Huh? Half-bright stoners
who won't ever leave

because you make them
feel special by association?

(laughs)

Do you gravitate toward
emotionally withholding women

who reflect your false sense
of your own worthlessness?

When you can't draw ego
sustenance from your acolytes,

do you have grandiose fantasies
about who you might become

to show your bio mom Billie
what a mistake she's made?

If you've answered yes
to any of those questions,

the defining experience
in your life is abandonment.

So, Trevor, what do you know
about your birth father?

TREVOR: All she told me
about my biological father

was that he was
three years older than her,

teenage ladies' man,

-football stud.
-Mm.

So, two careless
high school kids, huh?

(siren buzzes, whoops)

-AUSTIN: No, no, put that back.
-Are you kidding?

-We got to record what happens.
-Trevor, listen to me. Stop.

Okay, this is how it's gonna go.

You only speak when spoken to.

It's only "Yes, sir"
or "No, sir,"

and keep your hands
in plain sight at all times.

This is not a request.

Morning, Officer.

Sir, are you aware that
your right taillight is out?

Yes, sir.
I'm sorry about that, Officer.

I ordered the part from Germany.

It should be here tomorrow.
You know, it's kind of hard

to track down European
vintage car parts locally.

License and registration, please
-Sure.

And then I'm gonna need you both

to step out of the car,
gentlemen.

Easy, all right?

Just easy.

Keep your hands on the car
where I can see 'em, gentlemen.

(Trevor chuckles)

Oh, I cannot wait
till your pasty ass finds out

-what he does for a living.
-Hey, Trevor, chill.

What was that?

I mean, all you see is
two Black men in a car

that's a little too nice,
so it must be stolen, right?

Or we must be
into something illegal.

-Trevor, easy. Trevor...
-And once you run the plates,

-Trevor! Trevor!
-and they're clean, suddenly
you'll remember that we fit

the description
of a wanted Black man

wearing a shirt and pants,

-between five-one and six-eight.
-You might want to calm down,
son.

-Oh, I'm not your son.
-Son, put your hands
on that vehicle.

-Stop calling me "son."
-Officer...
-Get your hands on the car!

AUSTIN:
Trevor, back up!

-(tires screech)
-Call 911.

(dialing)

WOMAN:
911. What's your emergency?

TREVOR:
A cop got hit by a scooter.

We're on Rose,
just west of Nelson Boulevard.

-Ambulance is five minutes out.
-He won't make it that long.

His airway's flooded with blood.

In my glove box, there's a black
bag with a scalpel and pen.

Grab it.

(gasping)

You just helped save
a man's life.

♪

I've been able to rule out a lot
of things based on these labs.

-They're, they're all normal.
-Okay. That's progress.

Yeah, but a problem
with her heart

is still a distinct possibility.

Well, what exactly
are you looking for?

I need to know why she crashed.

Telemetry strip
gives me a window

into her cardiac rhythm while
she was in the hospital, but...

maybe we missed
an underlying arrhythmia.

-Sure, that is
a possibility, but...
-But...

what?

But it is unlikely, right?

"Unlikely" is not definitive.

We'll have a better sense
of things

if I measure
every peak and valley

on this damn strip.

We find a run of PVCs,
we're onto something.

I have another pair of calipers
in the box.

You want to grab a strip?

Sure. Yeah.

Conrad said
he wants everything in here.

Yeah, I'll bring it to him
when I do my check-in.

Well, he is deep down
a rabbit hole right now.

A medical mystery tour.

DEVON:
I'm not sure I like it.

Nic's dead.
Nothing's gonna change that.

So let him tilt at windmills.

It's not hurting you.

If he doesn't find
what he wants, then what?

You'll be there for him.

We all will.

Are we absolutely sure
that Nic couldn't have...

Are we absolutely sure that Nic
couldn't have had a seizure

or an ischemic stroke?

I know by the time
we did the scan,

her brain was swollen, so...

it might have been hard
to see something like that.

You know, we've been through all
of her labs and her tox screen.

Nothing suggests
she was predisposed

to a seizure or a stroke.

You're absolutely certain?

Having a hard time
connecting the dots here.

Yeah, I get that.

And you are a very formidable
diagnostician...

Oh, don't humor me, Billie.

Listen, but whatever
you're looking for,

it didn't happen in Nic's brain.

I'm sorry.

Nic was mine.

I was hers. It was us.

There was no me.

Now the only thing I recognize
about myself

is that I'm a doctor.

After my mom died,

my dad was finally able
to remember to hang up his towel

instead of tossing it
on the bed,

which drove her crazy.

I just kept telling him
how proud she'd be.

And I'll say the same to you.

Did Nic ever feel faint
or pass out as a kid,

like when you guys were playing
sports or something?

(exhales)

Not that I can remember.

Sorry.

LEELA:
He could have lost the patient.

JESSICA:
He would have lost the patient

if it weren't for Dr. Devi.

And then he told me to go stand
in the hallway.

What would you do?

You know that Kranepool and Bell
are super tight, right?

They've been besties
since we used leeches.

I'm aware of that.

Also, the Hippocratic oath is:
"Do no harm."

Not: "Stop an old white guy
who could destroy your career

from maybe doing harm."

I'm also aware of that.

But if his skills are diminished
and he wrecks a patient,

I would never forgive myself
for doing nothing.

I get that.

If you do decide
to make your concerns known,

just find a way to do it
without leaving a paper trail

or saying anything
that could be quoted, all right?

(laughs)
What am I supposed to do?

Communicate them
with an interpretive dance?

(laughs)

I would pay to see that.

You're not being helpful.

All right, I'm sorry.
I'm just...

I'm just too tired to think
right now.

Well, maybe Conrad
will be back soon,

and you won't have
to keep covering his shifts.

He is on his own schedule.

But I miss you.

I miss you, too.

I'm gonna have
to force myself to eat

before my next surgery
with Kranepool.

AUSTIN: 40-ish male versus
scooter high speed.

Airway secured during the field.
Level-1 trauma now.

Bay Ten.

AUSTIN:
Let's go, fellas.

DEVON:
All right, on my count.

One, two, three.

All right,
I'm starting the primary survey.

Crackles bilaterally.

He's tachy to the 150s.
Let's get him on a vent.

Let's get a vent in here!

The field cric
is perfectly done.

-This your work?
-Me and the kid.

Aortic regurgitation due
to severely damaged valve.

He's in rapid heart failure.

Call to the OR.
Book an emergency sternotomy.

-Hey, AJ.
-Yeah?

-Were you at the scene
of the accident?
-Oh, yeah.

Officer Winnaker pulled us over
and out of the car

for driving-while-Black,
then he pulled his gun out

and he got hit by the scooter.

-His gun?
-Yeah.

Are you sure you're in the right
headspace to work on him?

Pravesh, I saved
the guy's life once already.

I am not gonna lower
my batting average to .500,

patient's bad intentions
notwithstanding.

Thank you.

Hello, Dr. Devi.

I have cried twice this morning

trying to choose
a replacement for Nic.

Are you all right?

Say something, dear.

(loud crunching)

There's something
you need to communicate to me?

(crunch)

Oh... you wish
to remain anonymous.

Clever girl.

So, uh, does this concern
another doctor at the hospital?

(crunch)

A surgeon you've worked with?

(crunch)

Someone in whose OR
you've recently been?

(crunch)

Dr. Kranepool?

Oh.

Crunch no more.
I'll look into it.

Oh, one more question.

Can I have one of those?

BELL:
Aaron Kranepool?

-That's ridiculous.
-I've poked around.

-His stats are declining
precipitously.
-Oh, come on, Kit,

the guy's a machine.

He's only a couple of years
older than me--

-he still beats me at squash.
-You told me he cheats.

Well, no, I think what I said
was he's highly competitive.

I understand he's a good friend
and he's important to you.

No, it's-it's more than that.

He was a resident
when I was an intern,

and an attending
when I was a resident,

and he was... he was my example.

I'm sure he was a damn good one,

but it appears
things have changed.

Now, wasn't he
just down at Hopkins

for their
in-depth skills assessment?

You know self-reporting
poor results

for the Hopkins assessment
is optional.

The only person who sees it
is the doctor being tested.

Yeah, okay, okay.
So somebody reported him.

I don't need to know who,
just...

what exactly was said.

I couldn't possibly repeat
verbatim what was told to me.

Why not?

You are an exemplary surgeon.

I know you can't imagine
entering an OR

without being in perfect mental
and physical shape.

It would be anathema to you.

(takes deep breath)

Uh... well, exemplary,
I don't know.

I need to know

if there's even a small chance

that Kranepool
could injure a patient.

What do you need me to do?

He has a surgery this afternoon.

I'd like you to observe.

Fine. I'm-I'm sure
whatever was said is overblown.

Let's hope so.

CARR:
And you're absolutely sure
your hands were visible

the entire time?

Oh, my God,
for the third time, yes...

sir.

We just want to make sure
we have an accurate account.

Now, it's a natural reaction
to be angry

when you're pulled over.

Maybe you raised your voice,
took a step

-towards Officer Winnaker...
-How do you guys do this
with a straight face, huh?

I mean, if we were white,
we'd never be hands on the hood

-for a damn taillight.
-Easy, now.
That's a serious accusation.

Okay, I'm done answering
your transparent,

-insulting questions.
-Excuse me, officers.

I'm pretty sure
you have all you need.

You have our phone numbers.

If you need
any more information,

you know how to contact us.

We'll be in touch.

-Thank you.
-TREVOR: Mm-hmm.

(Austin sighs)

You want to watch me operate
on Officer Winnaker?

Yeah, I'm a little busy, so...

I'll pass.

Oh, yeah?

What, you got to go home
and cook up some Molly?

Go to the admin office
on the second floor.

You have to fill out
some paperwork.

What is going on
with you and Trevor?

He called me this morning
and we had breakfast.

Okay, I told you,
this is very complicated for me.

And with Nic gone,
I'm already pretty ragged.

-I don't need this, AJ.
-I get it, I get it. I'm sorry.

Bringing him here
was not part of the plan.

But then there seemed to be
a lesson in there

-that the kid could learn...
-Wait, who asked you
to give life lessons

to the kid I gave up?

Why are you so angry with him?

-(sighs)
-Huh?

He's curious about his genes.

He has a suspicion that nature
has a bigger hand in who he is

than nurture,
and those kind of questions

can torture a kid.

They tortured me.

You're overstepping,

and you need to stop.

What did I tell you?

Look at this run of PVCs.

Yeah, but it's...

I know she had a significant
brain injury at the time,

but before you say
anything else, look at this.

From when Nic got stabbed.
Her EKGs.

Okay.

Multiple PVCs.

This could be the answer
to something, but...

I don't know what.

Uh, she could have had
a genetic heart condition.

Her mother died young-- maybe
that's what happened to Nic.

Did GiGi inherit it?

If I know, I can address it.

When my father died, you
let me do what I needed to do,

and I want to repay
that kindness to you.

But what you found

are a few premature
ventricular contractions,

all when Nic was sick,
post-stabbing,

or with, ultimately,
a fatal brain injury.

Do you honestly...

find this significant?

Because...

I know it's not meaningful,
and I know that

because of what you taught me.

Bearing the Unbearable.

The Other Side of Sadness.

(tosses book)

How to Go On Living
When Someone You Love Dies.

(tosses book)

Those books
don't have the answer I need

when GiGi asks me
how her mother died.

(monitor beeping steadily)

AUSTIN:
The heart is exposed.

Prepare the bypass catheters.

Oh.

-Well, that could be a problem.
-Dr. Austin?

The proximal aorta was damaged
in the trauma.

People, we have to work quickly
if we don't want...

(monitor beeping rapidly)

Ruptured aorta.

All right, everybody, listen up,
there's a new plan.

All eyes on me.

We're gonna have to crash
on pump.

You two cannulate
the femoral artery.

I will cannulate the IVC
through the right atrium.

Be ready to start bypass
on my order.

We are against the clock,
people,

so let's move fast.

All right, clamp number one.

Scalpel.

Catheter.

ANESTHESIOLOGIST:
BP 87/48 and dropping.

Let's start the bypass. Cool
the blood to 18 degrees Celsius.

JESSICA:
Did we do it, Dr. Austin?

AUSTIN:
You did great.
But don't get too excited.

That was just step one
in keeping this man alive.

Once his temperature cools
to 18 degrees,

we will drain all the blood
out of his body.

-TREVOR: The hell?
-And then we will perform

a two-hour repair in 20 minutes
to give him his blood back

before he goes brain-dead.

Devi, where you headed?

OR One, Kranepool.

Hear he's a disaster.

It's our second dance
of the day.

He almost killed a patient
and then threatened to exile me.

I've been anxious all morning

at the thought of returning
to his OR.

I'm about to do battle
with a wicked spinal GBM.

-Love to have you with me.
-I wish I could.

Now let's hope I don't pass out
from the stress.

(chuckles quietly)

(dials)

-CONRAD: Hey.
-Hey.

You asked me if Nic
ever passed out playing sports--

and she didn't-- but she
did faint a few times at school.

Mm, when and what were
the circumstances?

Like, right before a big test.

You know, midterm or a final.

It's probably nothing,
but I thought you should know.

-Can you do me a favor?
-Name it.

I-I need you to call Kyle.

He's-he's not speaking to me.

Just, you can make up some
excuse why you're calling him,

and then,
I don't know, I just...

I need you to ask him if Nic's
mom had a history of fainting.

Will do.

(suction whirring)

Did your med school teach you
to assist the attending

or get in his way?

To assist, Dr. Kranepool.

KRANEPOOL (groans):
Are you deaf and blind?

LEELA:
No. I don't have either
of those disabilities.

KRANEPOOL:
I've had enough.
You need to scrub out,

get your eyes and ears checked.
Now.

-I'm sorry, Dr. Kranepool.
-Get out!

Now.

(rapid beeping)

ANESTHESIOLOGIST:
Patient is tachy to the 170s.

I need suction over here.

(suction whirring)

BELL:
Gloves, please.

-Thank you.
-(glove snaps)

Randolph, what the hell?

I was watching upstairs.

Just looked like
you could use a hand.

You were babysitting me?

BELL:
Suction.

Lap pad.

(rapid beeping continues)

And clamp.

(rapid beeping stops)

-KRANEPOOL: You crossed a line.
-Look, you shouldn't even
have been in the neighborhood

of the right hepatic,
then you blew through it

and you couldn't find it while
your patient was bleeding out.

You didn't leave me any choice.

(sighs)

You've got a set of balls
on you.

Hey, we need to have
an honest conversation

about your fitness for surgery.

-Are you for real?
-Oh, come on, Aaron,

what happened in there was
very problematic.

Oh, please.
You put on your cape

and flew in for a minor miscue.

You're a nervous Nellie.

You should be embarrassed.

(sighs)
Will you show me the results
of your Hopkins tests?

When did you become
so sanctimonious?

Surgery is rarely flawless.

-There are always complications.
-You used to be

the closest thing to flawless
I've ever seen.

I recall an appendectomy
you performed a few years back.

Your patient died on your table.

I didn't come knocking
on your door, did I?

But you should have.

I'm not the same man I was
four years ago.

-You got that right.
-It's the greatest regret
of my life,

putting my own self-interest
ahead of my patients'.

And if you want
to hold me accountable

for the appendectomy,
I will take what comes.

Good God, you've lost your way.

For the sake of our friendship,

don't mention
my surgical skills again.

I'll see you
on the squash court tonight.

A good, old-fashioned drubbing

will put your feet back
on the ground where they belong.

(door closes)

Right now
he's an enormous liability.

I wish I could fire him,
but we both know

-how difficult that is.
-That's like firing
a tenured professor.

Plus, he's an icon.

And he's entitled
to due process.

Well, it's a moot point.

We don't have
the necessary documentation

-to prove he's dangerous.
-True.

And most
of his patients' complications

fall under "acceptable" risks
of surgery.

Oh, the system doesn't work.

Yeah, well...

we've been allowed to build
too high a wall

to protect ourselves.

Bottom line,
Kranepool is a time bomb,

and I don't want him exploding
on my watch.

(sighs)

CONRAD:
Yeah.

We're getting close, kiddo.

Grandpa Kyle told Aunt Billie

that Mama and her mama
both fainted

a few times over the years.

-Yeah. Yeah.
-(squeals happily)

Always in the summer.

I know.

Always in the summer,
when it's hot

and they were dehydrated.

They didn't think
it was significant back then,

but now...

I think... it is very...

very significant.

We got a couple more things
we need to do.

-(squeals happily)
-Okay? Oh?

Yeah, you like that?

Couple more pieces
to complete our puzzle.

-(speaks baby talk)
-But I promise you,

I promise you I won't stop until
we have all the answers we need.

Hey, Conrad.

-Listen, about today...
-Ah, forget it.

I think I've figured it out.

-Okay.
-Nic has a family history
of early death,

starting with her mom.

They both had fainting spells.

Nic had PVCs on the monitor.

-Yes, but she had a normal echo
and a normal EKG.
-Which proves my point.

Everything we're talking about
is characteristic

of catecholaminergic
polymorphic VT.

(Devon sighs)

Listen.

Are you serious?

Do you know how rare that is?

But it makes perfect sense.

A genetic form
of sudden cardiac failure.

Conrad...

You can have
a normal resting heart function.

But stress and physical exertion
can cause serious arrhythmia.

You can pass out, even die.

Fine. I mean, that is possible.

All the panic attacks Nic had,

everything that we thought
was the thyroid,

that could have been CPVT.

Yes, it's a compelling theory...

She's stressed out
on the drive home,

rushing to get back to us.

That could have sparked
the arrhythmia.

Wait a second.

But it is a theory
without evidence.

That's why I brought GiGi in.

I'm gonna have her tested
for the CPVT gene.

Then I'll know.

So, um, how many times did
that cop almost die in there?

-Mm, by my count, three.
-Right, right.

So, um,
why'd you go above and beyond

and give this guy
the chance to destroy

a few more brothers
down the road?

(chuckles softly)
Look, the best I can do

in the face of ignorance
is be better.

My excellence is
the best revenge.

So you think this guy
is gonna change his worldview

because a Black doctor saved
his life with his "excellence"?

(laughs):
Come on, man, that's naive.

Whoa, hold up, slow your roll.

It's not about the cop,
Sherlock.

It's about me.

Saint or sinner,

they all get treated the same
underneath my knife.

In the sanctity of my OR,

there is no place
for moral relativism.

When the world around me
is irredeemable,

I am a righteous man.

What kind of man
do you want to be?

(door opens, closes)

I have an early surgery
tomorrow, so let's not dawdle.

I believe it's my serve.

You served the ball
out of bounds this morning,

so it's actually my serve.

No.

If we're gonna settle this
on the court,

we got to play
by the same rules.

The hell
is that supposed to mean?

(panting)

One-zero.

(Kranepool groans)

(Kranepool groaning)

(panting)

Seven-nothing.

(both panting)

I've been letting you win
for the past year.

You're not good enough.

Look, you taught me
how to play the game.

I could see how unbearable
it was for you to lose,

so I've just been ignoring
the bad calls.

Serve the damn ball.

-(grunts)
-(groans)

No, I'm all right... fine.

It's your peripheral vision.
We both know that.

I can put the ball where
you can't find it every time.

Serve the ball.

(groaning)

(both panting)

I take no joy in this, A.K.

People are getting hurt.

This is your exit ramp.
Just-just take it.

Rest on your laurels
before you destroy them.

I have no hobbies
and three alimonies.

What the hell am I supposed
to do with the rest of my life?

I don't know.

But you got to find a new game.

(exhales)

(grunts)

(faucet running)

(turns off faucet)

(sighs heavily)

To answer your question,

I'm not angry at him.

I'm trying to protect him.

From you?

He's not the product
of first love.

I was raped.

By our neighbor.

I was 13. He was a grown man.

Billie...

Trevor wants to know
who his father is.

Is that an answer anyone needs?

Damn.

I can't even...

begin to understand
that kind of pain.

And I can only imagine how hard
it is to even say those words.

So I'm honored
that you shared that with me.

-And, Billie, I am so...
-AJ,

don't say you're sorry.

You're a good man.

Just stay in your lane.

(door opens)

(door closes)

You get the results?

Uh...

negative.

She doesn't have it.

And...

Nic probably didn't, either.

A million things happen
every second

to every single person
on the planet.

Some are joyful,

most are inconsequential,

and a few...

(choked up):
are unbearable.

Those are the hardest ones
to explain.

Can you make peace with that?

You've been talking at me
nonstop all day.

What happened, you, uh, you
run out of words or something?

(wry chuckle)

Not possible.

(laughs)
Yeah, I didn't think so.

Hey, so would it be cool
if I come back to watch

some more of your surgeries?

Look, Trevor, um...

Look, we can keep meeting up,
right?

You know, grab something to eat,
chop it up.

-Yeah.
-But, um...

we're gonna have to steer clear
of Chastain.

She, uh, she told you
not to bring me around?

Yeah.

What the hell
did I ever do to her?

Nothing.

Now, this is not on you.

This is no reflection
of your worth, Trevor.

This is about Billie.

All right?
You haven't done anything wrong.

Yeah, it doesn't feel
like that, man.

I know. I know, man.

And I know in the moment
you may feel... disposable.

But you are not.

Billie's got her own story, man.

She... she's got her own damage.

You're just caught up
in the crossfire.

You hear me?

Yeah.

Yeah, I hear you.

All right.

♪

I'm embarrassed to admit it,
but I'm still not even sure

I did the right thing
reporting Kranepool.

Look, Kranepool
almost killed someone

after he banned you from his OR.

If you hadn't told Kit,
Bell wouldn't have been in there

to save the patient's life.

Thank you.

For what?

For confirming what I believe.

That people deserve the truth,

no matter how complicated
or painful it can be.

To friends, old and new.

(chuckles)

(sighs)
Everything hurts.

Well, not to minimize
your discomfort...

but it was worth it.

Aaron Kranepool has retired.

(sighing)

Well...

I'm relieved, but...

maybe a little heartbroken.

You've saved
who knows how many lives.

I lost an old friend
in the bargain.

You've done him
a great service as well.

Perhaps one day
he'll figure that out.

-(exhales)
-Oh, come on, look,

your posture cannot be helping
your discomfort. Scooch down.

(groans in pain)

-Wait, wait, wait.
-(laughs)

(long exhale)

-How does that feel?
-Good, really...

(chuckles)
That's good.

Just promise me

when it's time for me to hang up
my squash racket, you'll...

just-just tell me

-in no uncertain terms.
-Oh, you know I will.

No, I do know that.

It gives me great comfort.

(takes deep breath)

Should we have that dinner
we've been trying to have?

I'd like that.

(Bell takes deep breath)

You know, Kit,
apropos of so many things,

there's-there's no one's opinion
of me that matters more...

...than yours.

♪ Standing on the platform ♪

♪ Watching you go ♪

♪ It's like no other pain ♪

♪ I've ever known ♪

♪ Strangers rushing past ♪

♪ Just trying to get home ♪

♪ You were the only ♪

♪ Safe haven that I've known ♪

♪ Hits me at full speed ♪

♪ Feel like I can't breathe ♪

♪ And nobody knows ♪

♪ This pain inside me ♪

♪ My world is crumbling ♪

♪ I should never have ♪

♪ Let you go ♪

(exhales)

♪ I think I'm lost ♪

♪ Without you ♪

♪ Standing on the platform ♪

♪ Watching you go ♪

♪ You said,
"I want to see the world" ♪

♪ And I said ♪

♪ "Go." ♪

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