All language subtitles for The Nanny s05 e16

-Good morning.
-Morning.

Oh, how does it feel to wake up
an engaged woman?

Well, you know how sometimes
they say

when you finally attain
your dream,

-it's always a letdown?
-Hmm-mmm.

They were wrong.

Shall I prepare your Carnation
Instant Breakfast,

Mrs. Sheffield?

You called me Mrs. Sheffield.

I did. I did.

-Say it again. Say it again.
-Mrs. Sheffield. Mrs. Sheffield.

Can you get me a satellite dish?

Look, we're only engaged.
Wait until after the honeymoon.

I'll get you Ted Turner
on the roof with a hanger.

Who is it?

The future
Mrs. Sheffield's mother.

Hi, Ma.

So do we have a ring yet?

Ma, you know that
when they caught the mugger

they never recovered the ring.

Meanwhile, that mugger's
girlfriend is giving him

the conjugal visit of his life.

Darling, it's not
a real engagement

until I can take
my daughter's hand

and say, "Stick these karats
in your soup, Mrs. Glickman."

Well, you know, we're gonna use
the pop top for a while.

I mean, Max and I love
each other

and that's all that
really matters.

I don't care
if I ever get a ring.

All right. She's turning into
a shiksa right before my eyes.

-Hi, sweetie.
-Darling.

How are you feeling? Any better?

A little. My back is still a bit
stiff from the mugging.

You know what's good for that?

Walking.

Have you ever tried walking
through the Diamond District?

As a matter of fact, Sylvia,
I've set the whole morning aside

to take your daughter shopping
for an engagement ring.

You know, we should go to my
Uncle Stanley's jewelry store

on 47th Street.

He has got a gold-plated
borscht belt chess set

with a Joey Bishop bishop.

That's probably gone.

I'd really rather go
to my jeweler at Cartier.

-Retail?
-Retail?

Out of the question.

Stanley would be so insulted

if his future nephew
didn't at least stop by.

All right.

But I have to call C.C. first.

You know, I forgot to tell her
about the engagement.

Oh, I've taken care of that
for you, sir.

[door bell chimes]

♪Fran and Maxwell are engaged

♪It looks like
You're the loser

♪She'll be happy all her days
And you'll become a boozer

♪ She was working
In a bridal shop ♪

♪ In Flushing, Queens ♪

♪ Til her boyfriend
Kicked her out ♪

♪ In one of those
Crushing scenes ♪

♪ What was she to do?
Where was she to go? ♪

♪ She was out on her fanny ♪

♪ So over the bridge
From Flushing ♪

♪ To the Sheffield's door ♪

♪ She was there to sell
make-up
But the father saw more ♪

♪ She had style! She had
flair!
She was there ♪

♪ That's how she became ♪

♪ The Nanny ♪

♪ Who would have guessed
That the girl we described ♪

♪ Was just exactly
What the doctor prescribed? ♪

♪ Now, the father
Finds her beguiling ♪

♪ Watch out C.C. ♪

♪ And the kids
Are actually smiling ♪

♪ Such joie de vivre ♪

♪ She's the lady in red ♪

♪ When everybody else
Is wearing tan ♪

♪ The flashy girl
From Flushing ♪

♪ The Nanny named Fran! ♪

I know you can't get your house
keys copied at Cartier,

but a lot of people say they do
have a lot of very nice stuff.

Oh, Maxwell, look at this. Uncle
Stanley designed this himself.

It's a lion's head made out
of four ounces of diamond chips.

He calls it the quarter pounder.

Franny.

Uncle Stanley.

-Hi.
-Hello, Stanley.

What's with the hand?
You're practically family.

You know, this girl is like
a daughter to me.

You can have anything
in the store at cost.

Plus 20% to cover
expenses. You understand.

Tell me, Stanley.
What grade is that stone there?

I don't like to label.

Mmm. Is that a crack?

If you have to ask,
how big could it be?

My God, this has to be the
gaudiest thing I've ever seen.

Eighty-six it. If you like it,
I'll try and work him down.

No, I'm sorry, Stanley, but I
really don't think you have

the kind of ring
that we're looking for.

You need keys?

-Well...
-Well, maybe for the back door.

Oh, I can't believe
we're in Cartier.

And just look at
all these diamonds.

Of course, we carry an exquisite
selection of De Beers.

Oh, beer sounds good. I'm a
little parched. Grab me a Heiny.

Oh, Maxwell.

Darling, I just want you
to be happy.

Oh, my God.

It's the most gorgeous thing
I've ever seen.

Do you think the stone
is too big for my finger?

I can find you
something smaller.

Oh, no, I'll just grow my nail.

So, what do you think?

Let me see.

Oh no,
Now, that taka is a gezunt ring.

You know, technically,
the kids are Jewish now.

It goes by the mother.

-Oh, maybe that's Ms. Babcock.
-Oh!

She hasn't seen the ring yet.

It is Ms. Babcock. It is.

Their next gig will be tapping
on your grave.

What are you so happy about?

Hoover introduce
its spring line?

No, I'm just happy
about Ms. Fine's engagement.

They ain't married yet.
I haven't seen a ring.

Well, then, C.C. Babcock,
come on down.

Well, it's beautiful.

I have to get back to work.

Fran, I just got a phone call.

Apparently, we made
Liz Smith's column.

Oh, wait a minute. Here it is.

Oh, look at that.

"Maxwell Sheffield,
Tony Award winner,

is marrying the help."

Well, you know the old saying,

"It doesn't matter what
they say about you

as long as they
spell your name right."

"Fran Fone."

Don't let that bother you,
Ms. Fine.

The Claringtons cordially invite
Mr. Maxwell Sheffield

and his fiancée, Fran Fine,
to the social event of the year.

Oh, do you realize that this is

the very first thing
that acknowledges me

as your future wife?

Oh, I'm going to have to take
this right down to Kinko's

because everyone is telling Ma
she's a big fat liar.

-Where is it?
-I can't remember.

No!

It's possible I left it
under Ms. Babcock's sandwich.

This is the most exclusive

clothing store
in all of New York.

Apparently, it's so exclusive

they don't even
let the clothes in.

Where do you think
their regulars are?

There.

Miss. Excuse me. Hello.

I'm sorry, the ladies' room
is for customers only.

I happen to have an appointment.

I have a very important affair

that I need something
very special for.

Well, then maybe you should try
down the street

at Flash and Trash.

Is that store not great or what?

Darling, it's obvious
you're cranky

because you haven't had lunch.

Ever.

But my daughter

is engaged to Maxwell Sheffield,
the Broadway producer.

Oh, I'm sorry.

You're Fran Fone.

Yes, that is to whom
you are speaking.

And this is my Ma.

Enchantee.

And this is my dear friend,
Valerie Toriello

of the Flushing Meadows
Toriellos.

North of the tire
recycling center.

Well, may I interest any of you
in an Issey Miyake?

Oh, I'll try it.

Is it anything like rumaki?

I mean, is it
in the same family?

Oh, Val, I'm so nervous
about this dinner party.

I just want to make
a good impression, you know?

Help me find something that
makes me look a little less...

Happy hour?

-Yeah.
-Huh-huh.

How about...

Well, this. How about this?

No good?

You look like you swallowed
an accordion.

Oh... Girl, come here.
Come here.

You are very upset
by this marriage, aren't you?

No, I love Fran
and Daddy does too.

No, he doesn't.

Ms. Babcock, as hard as this is,

you have to accept it so that
you can move on with your life.

I've tried.

I've really tried,
but you don't know

how hard it is for me.

I'm so alone in this world.

The only men I ever meet
are the ones I audition.

Do you know how many
straight chorus boys

there are in this town?

I do.

The only thing I have
to look forward to

is saying goodbye to Niles.

Maxwell told me they were going
to fire him

when they got married.

I knew you were there.
You reek of Tilex.

Oh, Fran.
You look absolutely stunning.

I can't wait to get there
and show you off.

Well, maybe afterwards,
we could take a stroll

through my old neighborhood

and I can show you off.

Although, then I'd have to leave
the ring at home. No.

-I'll go get the car.
-Okay.

Oh, Niles, I'm so nervous
about this party tonight.

What do I have in common
with these people?

You've been to parties
like this before?

Yeah, but I was never invited.

Oh, well. What the hell.
Wish me luck.

Oh, you don't need luck,
Ms. Fine.

You have style. You have flair.

That's how you became the nanny.

Oh, Niles, it is just all
so romantic.

I mean, it's so magical.

He treats me like a princess.

[car honking]

I'm coming!

Oh, we are so married.

I'll tell you, I just love
what you've done to your house.

You know, my aunt has
a ceiling mural too.

Only she's got
a cottage cheese ceiling,

so all the cherubs look like
they have acne.

It's not as nice.

-Hello, darling.
-Hi, sweetie.

Maxwell, your fiancée is
just delightful.

Wherever did you find her?

Well, believe it or not,

she just turned up
at my doorstep,

selling cosmetics.

I believe it.

It's just like that film
with Richard Gere

when he married the hooker.

I remind you of Julia Roberts?

Thanks.

And I thought I wasn't going
to fit in.

So, Kyle, tell me,
how's your portfolio holding up

with all this business
in the Asian markets?

Oh, still in the black, but I'm
thinking of consolidating.

You know,
speaking of consolidating,

you have so much
smoked salmon left over.

I'm going to condense it
to one plate.

You'll have lox and eggs
all weekend.

Is this caviar still good?

Let's see.

I can't tell unless I have it
on toast point.

Do you believe
how they're ripping apart

Maxwell Sheffield's fiancée?

Oh, it's disgraceful.

I would die if they talked
behind my back that way.

I feel so sorry for her.

Oh, Ma.

There I thought
that I was really fitting in

and they were really
liking me and...

They were just laughing at me
behind my back.

Oh, I don't know.

For the first time,
I'm beginning to wonder

maybe I'm not good enough
for Maxwell.

What did they serve?

Ma, I'm pouring my heart out
to you.

Medallions of beef
with a so-so bearnaise.

Darling, do you remember
when we went

to the Doral Hotel

-in Miami Beach?
-Yeah.

And I went to the pool bar
wearing a string bikini?

Do you know why people
were laughing behind my back?

Because that was the view
that was funny?

No. Because they were jealous.

Because I dared to be different.

You're different. Unique.

What was the dessert?

Oh, Ma, you know, I know you're
just trying to help me,

but sometimes you don't want
to be different.

Sometimes you just want
to fit in.

Hello, Fran.

Hi.

Oh, hello, Ma.

Well, that was
supremely awkward.

Would you mind if we stick
with Sylvia?

Oh, of course.

I mean, it's all so new.

I mean, we hardly see
each other.

Maybe I should come over
more often.

Ma!

Ma! It's the most natural thing
in the world!

See?

So has your daughter been
telling you

what a smash hit
she was last night?

Oh, let's not rehash my triumph.

It was a wonderful evening.
I loved them.

They loved me.
We loved each other.

Well, that's good
because I invited them all

over here Saturday night
for dinner.

Yeah, you know,
the Broadway investor

is a dying breed

and all these people
are potential backers.

Whom I'm sure you will charm
just like you did last night.

Oh, good, honey.
Can't wait. Bye.

Oh, Ma, can you believe that?

He's invited them all over
for dinner

and he's gonna be counting on me

and I'm going to humiliate him.

What are you going to serve?

Would you like some company?

Why would you want
to sit next to me?

Because you got the chicken.

Here you go.

It was extra crispy,
but I've been crying.

I know you.

Your picture was
in the society column.

You're Fran Fone.

You read the society column?

Oh, read it, sleep on it,
whatever.

Why are you crying?

Oh, I don't want to burden you
with my problems.

Oh. Would you like a hanky?

Thank you.

No.

Oh, did you ever feel
like you didn't belong?

Like you were a complete loser

and you were about to disappoint
the man of your dreams?

Yeah.

Look at me, going on and on
about my problems

when I have so much
to be grateful for.

You know what?

Let me give you my home address

and if ever you're
in the neighborhood

and you're hungry,

please stop by,
we always have lots of chicken.

But if a woman named Sylvia
answers the door,

you're out of luck.

Here you go.

You're a very sweet young lady

and I can't imagine that you
could disappoint any man.

Aw.

Say, would you like
a Life Saver?

Thank you, no.

Well, I've heard
of fashionably late,

but three hours
is bloody avant-garde.

Well, this is a disaster.

I've got enough shrimp
to feed 45 people.

Oh, don't worry, Niles.

I'll invite Ma
to brunch tomorrow.

Oh, great. Now I have to go out
and get more.

I just don't understand.
Is it me?

Did I say something
to offend them?

You know, honey,
a lot of people drive Jaguars,

so you're bound to get
some anti-British sentiment.

Oh, sweetie, you know,
you did do something.

You're such a rich, classy,
society guy

and you're marrying
so beneath you.

What are you talking about?

The reason why
nobody is here tonight

is because they hated me.

They were all laughing
behind my back.

I'm the reason why you're losing

all of your
potential new backers.

Niles, what time is it?

-It's 9:07.
-Remember that time.

This is the moment
Maxwell Sheffield realizes

he couldn't possibly
marry Nanny Fine.

Well, to hell with them.

Oh, my poor darling.

Don't you realize you're worth
more to me than any of them.

I love you.

Nine-o-seven and ten seconds.

Oh, please.

Let's see just how far
that love takes you

when you're standing on a corner

with a sign
around your neck that says,

"Will produce revival
of Brigadoon for food."

-Good evening, sir.
-Hello.

I believe I was invited.

Oh, my God. Would you excuse me
a minute, Fran?

Oh, no. I'll take care of this.
I met him in the park

and I told him that
if he were hungry,

he can come by
and I'd give him some food.

And maybe a couple of bucks.

-What are you talking about?
-What?

This is Preston Collier.
I invited him.

When Bill Gates needs to borrow
a cup of money,

this is the door he knocks on.

Preston, I'm so glad
you could make it.

Thank you.

You have
a wonderful woman here, Max.

You know, she thought
I was hungry

and she invited me
right into your home.

Me, someone she just met
on a park bench.

That is so sweet
and so like her.

Don't ever do that again.

So if you're rich, then what
were you doing hanging out

in Preston Collier Park?

Oh, wait a minute.

You know, Max, I don't
ordinarily invest in shows,

but you obviously have
impeccable taste.

Whatever amount it is,
count me in.

I'm calling it.
Time of death, 9:10.

-Hi.
-Hi, Sylvia.

Oh, darlings, I understand.

You're still not comfortable
calling me Grandma yet.

It's still new.

Maybe if I came by more often...

-Grandma.
-Nana.

Bubbe.

[theme music playing]

[theme music ends]