All language subtitles for The Nanny s05 e14

Ah, good afternoon, Ms. Fine.

Good afternoon, Mr. Sheffield.

You know, the kids
are at school.

Niles is shopping.

We could do it.

[slears throat] All right.

Hi, Fran.

Hi, Max.

You look beautiful, Fran.

Oh! Over 40 and you can say
it again so quick.

I'm home.

Oh. Eyelash, right there.
I got it,

-Ms. Fine.
-Thanks. Thanks.

Good cover there, uh, "Max."

Who told you about
the first-name thing?

The guy that owns
the fruit stand.

How the hell does he know?

I'm making ambrosia tonight.

-Fran, guess what.
-What?

My friend, Billy invited me
to spend term break

with him and his family
in the Middle East.

-Oh.
-Oh,

that is so exciting, sweetheart.

You know, his father is royalty.

Yeah, he's the Sultan
of Koorestan.

Wow! Gee, I wonder
if he knows my cousin, Barry,

the waterbed king.

So can I go, Daddy?

Maggie and Brighton
are going away.

Oh, sweetheart. As much as
I'd like you to go to Koorestan,

it's very, very far away.

Yeah, honey. We'll have
a good time here.

The house will be empty.

It'll just be your father
and me and...

You know, I don't think Niles

has ever been
to the Middle East.

No, not Niles. I need him here.

I have a mountain of work to do.

I... I tell you what, Ms. Fine.
Why don't you take her?

[laughs awkwardly]
Excuse me, honey.

You know,

I think this little girl will be
very disappointed

if she doesn't go with Niles.

Grace has never been
anywhere with Niles.

This little girl.

Honey, honey, honey.
Go upstairs.

-Let me talk to your father.
-Okay.

Well, I'm obviously being
a little too subtle here.

But with the kids
out of the house,

we could call each other
Fran and Max

in every room of the house.

Look at that.

Tempting as that sounds, Fran.
This is a very busy time for me.

I have investors to entertain

and I'd like
to serve them something

other than Gino's Pizza Rolls.

One brunch
and I'm branded for life.

I don't understand why you don't
wanna spend time with me.

Wait, who said I don't wanna
spend time with you?

-I have to earn a living.
-Ah!

That's right. I have expenses.

You know, this year alone,
my food bill doubled.

Now, please let's not bring
my mother into this.

Oh, God.

I guess I'm going back
to the desert.

But I might not return
that quickly.

Our people tend
to dilly-dally there.

-Fran, come on.
-Ms. Fine!

You and Nanny Fine
are having a big, old fight

about shipping her off
to the Middle East.

-Who told you that?
-The garbage man.

♪ She was working
in a bridal shop ♪

♪ In Flushing, Queens ♪

♪ Til her boyfriend
kicked her out ♪

♪ In one of those
crushing scenes ♪

♪ What was she to do?
Where was she to go? ♪

♪ She was out on her fanny ♪

♪ So over the bridge
from Flushing ♪

♪ To the Sheffield's door ♪

♪ She was there to sell makeup
but the father saw more ♪

♪ She had style, she had flair
she was there ♪

♪ That's how she became ♪

♪ The Nanny ♪

♪ Who would have guessed
that the girl we described ♪

♪ Was just exactly
what the doctor prescribed? ♪

♪ Now, the father
finds her beguiling ♪

♪ Watch out C.C. ♪

♪ And the kids
are actually smiling ♪

♪ Such joie de vivre ♪

♪ She's the lady in red ♪

♪ When everybody else
is wearing tan ♪

♪ The flashy girl
from Flushing ♪

♪ The Nanny named Fran ♪

I know, honey.

It's just that I keep running
this fight that I had

with your father over
and over in my mind.

I don't know
how I'm gonna have a good time.

Wow! Is this place drop-dead
gorgeous?

This is even more beautiful
than the Taj Mahal.

Fran, when were you in India?

Trump opened
another one in India?

Now, this would be your room

and Ms. Grace's room is
connected through that door.

Wow, you guys really went
all out at the Bombay Company.

Now, His Majesty, the Sultan
is expecting you for dinner.

-Okay.
-And he requests

that you both wear
traditional garb

which you'll find
in your closets.

Oh, boy.

Gee, do you have anything
that breathes a little bit?

Because I know that
it's a dry heat,

but at 117 degrees,

any way you look at it,
it's aschvitz

[exclaims]

Gracie, if I die tomorrow...

Toi, toi, toi.

I can honestly say
I was treated like royalty.

We napped in satin sheets,
we bathed in lilac-scented water

and even in Arabic,

"Alf" transcends
the language barrier.

Gracie! I'm so happy to see you.

Hi, Billy.

Smile.

Fran, this is my friend, Billy.

Oh, hi. My compliments
on your beautiful home.

Who designed it?

It was built
during the First Dynasty

by the Sultan Ali.

Oh, wow, do you have his card?

Because my Aunt Ceil is thinking

of adding an island
to her kitchen.

Billy, you said you had a camel.
Can we go see it?

Sure. But while you're here.

It's, uh, customary to address
me as Prince Mohammed.

But, Prince Mohammed,

your nickname at school
is Goober.

His Highness, the sultan.

King Hassan...

It is a pleasure finally to meet
my son's American guests.

Ms. Sheffield, Ms. Fine.

-Hi.
-Welcome.

You know,
you look exactly like...

Like you do on the back
of the Koorestan Shekel.

Yes.

Sometimes, I like to make a bet
with someone.

So I can flip it
in the air and shout

"Tails or me!" [laughs]

-Tails or me.
-[laughs] That's a good one.

Can I take a picture of us?

I have it all set
for self-timer.

Come on, everybody.
Smush

Cheese.

-[shutter clicking]
-[Fran chuckles]

I'll make copies for everybody.
It'll be a very nice memento.

[music playing on TV]

[sighs]

Oh! Oh!

Master Brighton, just because

your vacation plans
fell through,

you don't have to sit around
like a zombie.

This is the most exciting city
in the world. Go out.

There are parks, museums,
concerts.

Uh-huh, yeah.
Look, can you move?

I can't see
Yasmine Bleeth's butt.

Hello, I was watching that.

Well, now you're watching this.

You watchingClueless?

Wouldn't that be
a little bit redundant?

Well, at least I'm not watching

the "women I'll never get
within 100 miles of" channel.

You know what, shut up!
I'm so sick of this.

All right! That's it!

Everybody up and out,

or I will tell your father
that you...

That you...

God, you kids are dull.

Just go out and get
something pierced!

What's gotten into him?

[groans]

Oh, honestly, Niles.

Am I the only one
who does any work around here?

I'm going to let that pass.

I know that you are angry

because you had a fight
with Ms. Fine.

And she has to understand

that I cannot
just drop everything

to spend time with her.

Right. She has to understand
that men are the providers.

The warriors, the hunters.

Oh, I am killing myself.
I didn't get tulips.

-Oh, why can't a woman
be more like a man?
-Hmm.

Well, there's your prototype.

Oh, Your Highness, this has been
an incredible five days.

Thank you so much
for inviting me to this party.

-No.
-[applause]

You know, Fran,
I did not even think

I would have a chance
to dance with you.

When Hosni Mubarak
gets a few drinks in him,

he becomes quite the chatterbox.

Oh, here.

Oh, thank you.

Gee, you know, I love your pin.
It's so gorgeous.

Well. Then it is yours.

Oh, no. No, I couldn't.

Oh, but you must.

It is customary in our country

when a guest admires
a possession,

-she must have it.
-Oh, did I say "pin"?

I meant "palace."
[laughs]

No, you know,
it's very beautiful,

but it's really more my mother.
[chuckles]

Then I think I should
love your mother.

Uh-oh...
Now, she's yours.

-Oh. [laughs]
-[laughs]

Oh, I'll be honest with you,
Your Highness.

I really didn't wanna come here
at first,

but I'm having a wonderful time.

Are you not homesick?

I was a little homesick,

but then I went downtown
and I found a Golden Arches.

I'll tell you,
they'd make a mint selling

that McShawarma
back in the States.

Thank you.

-Oh, Fran.
-Yes?

I have enjoyed
your company immensely.

And my son, he...
he adores you.

Oh, he is such a sweet boy.

I'll tell you, everybody
has been so nice.

I'm gonna miss this place.

Then why don't you stay?

Well, you know, I...
I would,

but I'm on a restricted ticket

and that would mean
another 72.50 if I...

No. No, no, no.

Fran, I mean why don't you stay
and live with us,

here in the palace forever?

Oh, forever?

Oh, um, oh, Your Highness, um...

Well, that would mean
that I wouldn't be home in time

for the last episode
ofSeinfeld.

Oh, I'll get it.

Hello, Sheffield residence.

Ma, I gotta talk to you.

[chuckles]
How did you know I was here?

I got calls from Brighton,
Maggie,

Niles and Roger Clinton
next door.

He said his pizza
was never delivered.

He should thank me.

Chunky runs in that family.

Ma, I gotta tell you something
you're not gonna believe.

I think I just got
a marriage proposal.

What? You live with
a gorgeous millionaire

who is this close
to a son to me.

Who is thisyutz

The king of this country.

Is he tall?

Ma!

Six-one-ish.

The point is,
I'm in love with Mr. Sheffield.

Has he mentioned me?
Does he miss me?

I have not seen him all week.

If I didn't know better,

I would think
it was intentional.

-[knock on door]
-Oh, Ma, I gotta go.

I think
that's my lady-in-waiting

bringing me my Diet Pepsi.

Bye. [kisses]

Coming!

Oh, Your Highness.

[stutters]
What are you doing here?

I sent a message for you
to meet me on the veranda.

Oh, you meant my veranda.
Because you know, there's like

200 verandas
sticking out of this place.

You'll have to be more specific.

If this is awkward for you,
I can leave.

Oh, no, no, you might
as well stay.

I mean, you walked the two miles
down the corridor to get here.

Come in.

I have come for my answer.

Will you stay?

You know, I am really,
very flattered,

but we hardly know each other.

But I know you're beautiful,

intelligent,

charming.

And I know you're a king.

All right, we bonded.

The thing is, um,

I'm really sort of involved
with Mr. Sheffield.

I mean, Maxwell.

We are on a first-name
basis, you know.

It's just we don't say it

in front of other people
is the thing.

But, we've only been together
for five years.

We don't wanna rush
these things.

Does that sound
as pathetic to you

as it did to me?

Ah, the Englishman.

What can this man possibly
offer you that I cannot?

You know,
you're offering me everything

that I have ever dreamed of.

But I... I can't stay. I...

I must say no.

I should warn you,
I do not give up easily.

I am a man who does not like
the answer "no."

Well, I'm... I'm sure I can't be

the first girl
to ever say no to you.

I mean, what are you gonna do,
chop my head off? [laughs]

Kidding.

What's that?

It's my present
for Mr. Sheffield.

-Next week is his birthday.
-Why didn't you remind me?

You are just trying
to make me look bad.

No. That would be
gilding the lily.

Niles, hasn't Ms. Fine
even bothered

to call to check up
on the children?

I believe
they're all right, sir.

Well, then I guess it's time
to get back to work.

Maxwell, I finished our work
so we'd have some free time.

Isn't she a good girl?

But I can also be bad.

No, sir. No postcards
from Ms. Fine, either.

Oh, Niles, what have I done?

I mean, what was she asking for
after all? Hmm?

Just to spend
a little more time with me?

I guess I'll just admit
I was wrong

and ask her forgiveness.

No. That would be
the worst thing you could do.

It's weak. You wanna get to her?

Make believe you're
with another woman.

Uh...No, C.C., I'm gonna go
upstairs and call her right now.

Wait! Wait! I have
a surprise for you.

Happy birthday!

I know it's a week early,
but I thought,

you know, you could use it now.

Oh, an airline ticket
to Koorestan.

C.C., you are
a hopeless romantic. Mwah.

Niles, pack my bags!

I guess you're not the only one
who can be bad.

But, Fran,
I don't wanna go home.

I'm having a blast.

And besides, Billy and I

are even going
for a camel ride later.

Honey, I got an Aunt Gert
at home with a hump.

You can ride her up and down

Queens Boulevard all you want
once we go home.

Go to the armoire,
get all my clothes.

I'm gonna get the tickets.

Where are the tickets
and the passports?

Fran, all your clothes are gone.

All of them?

-Something's not kosher here.
-Honey, nothing's kosher here.

All right, listen.

Uh, you know what?
You stay put.

I'm gonna go talk to the sultan
and find out what's going on.

I'll be right back.

Oh. Oh. Oh!

Oh. Oh.

Honey.

I guess he really wouldn't
take no for an answer.

Boy, I don't wanna
scare you, sweetie,

but I think we're being
held hostage here!

Oh, my God,
this is like that movie,

Not Without My Daughter.

Which, personally,
I think was a poor choice

to show on the plane over here.

Well, that guard might be good
at holding an AK-47,

but he sure isn't good
at holding his Snapple.

Fran, do you really think
this is gonna work?

Sure, sure. Honey,
we'll just be casual.

We look like belly dancers,

we'll waltz our way out of here.
Follow me.

[clapping]

Aah.

Ms. Fine, what are you doing?

Uh, staying alive?

Uh... Well, actually,
you know, king,

we were looking for you

because we were gonna
go into town,

maybe have a little lunch,

go visit the American Embassy.

Would you be up
for something like that?

Ms. Fine. Ms. Fine.
Oh, Ms. Fine! There you are!

-Daddy!
-Finally, I found you.

What are you doing?
How did you get in the palace?

[stutters] I just knocked
on the palace door

and before I knew it,
everyone's bowing

and scraping
and kissing my ring.

I have to say
this is the friendliest

bloody country in the world.

Yeah. Well, it's a little too
friendly if you ask me. Ow! Ow!

Hello. Maxwell Sheffield.

His Majesty, the Sultan...

Hassan.

Oh. Oh!
Oh. [clears throat]

-Well, Your Majesty.
-So...

This is the man you say
I remind you of?

Really?

-I don't see it.
-I don't see it.

This man
was holding us hostage here!

[scoffs]
What do you mean, hostage?

Oh, come now.

I reject you
and suddenly

I can't find my tickets
or my passport?

I had them locked up
in the palace safe.

They're worth a great deal
of money on the black market.

Uh-huh. And why was there
a guard outside of our door?

There were some
terrorist threats.

I wanted to ensure your safety.

All right, Mr. Know-It-All.

How do you get the nougat
inside a 3 Musketeers bar?

Actually, it's a three-tiered
process.

First, they turn the nougat
into a strip...

Okay, okay.

I'm telling you, Mr. Sheffield.

This man was forcing me
to stay here

to be his wife.
Go on. Tell him.

Wife? Ha.

I wanted you here as my nanny.

Oh, please. Well,

what was all that talk about me
staying here forever, huh?

I have four wives.

Goober is not
the end of the line.

Believe me,
I have no romantic interest

in you whatsoever.

You are free to leave
at any time.

And now would be good.

[claps]

Well, I better go say goodbye
to Billy

while I'm still in this outfit.

Mr. Sheffield, I know
that I'm not crazy.

That king was coming onto me.

Well, of course he was,
Ms. Fine.

Of course he was.

Anyone could see
he was smitten with you.

-Wasn't he?
-Of course, he was.

He's a man.

And unfortunately, some men

are just not very good
at expressing their feelings.

And I could see right through
that sultan.

Oh, yes, you'd start
as his nanny, all right.

You'd start working for him
for a few years

and eventually
you'd be on a first-name basis

and then, one day
he'd come to realize

you were more important to him
than his work.

And then, ha...

Then, he'd tell you
he loves you.

And, uh, when does that happen?

Right now.

I love you.

What?

Fran.

I love you.

-[ding]
-Ladies and gentlemen,

thank you for flying
Koorestan Air.

We know you have a choice
when you fly.

So will the woman in 3-B,
who spent the last 17 hours

kvelling that her boss
finally told her he loves her,

please next time
choose Quantas.

[theme music playing]

[theme music ends]

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