All language subtitles for The Nanny S04 E05

-Good morning.
-Miss Fine, these were
delivered
for you.

Oh, great.

Ahh. Ms. Fine, filling in
for your cousin

Mel the doorman again?

I wish.
Is that a cushy job or what?

All he does is open doors
and receive packages.

A baboon could do that.

Well, of course,
a highly trained baboon.

Mr. Sheffield,
what do you
think?

I'm gonna make some mingle
at the Yacht Club today.

-Yacht Club?
-Uh huh.

That's setting your sights
high,
isn't it?

You know, I am not
the same chick I
was

when I started
here
three years ago.

I mean, I can't look for
love
in all the old joints,

now that I've acquired
so much class and panache.

There's that Band-Aid
that came off in the
bathtub.

[THEME MUSIC PLAYING]

♪♪ She was working
in a bridal shop
in Flushing, Queens ♪♪

♪♪ 'Til her boyfriend
kicked her out ♪♪

♪♪ in one of those
crushing scenes ♪♪

♪♪ What was she to do?
Where was she to go? ♪♪

♪♪ She was out on her fanny ♪♪

♪♪ So over the bridge
from Flushing to the
Sheffield's door ♪♪

♪♪ She was there
to sell makeup,
but the father saw more ♪♪

♪♪ She had style!
She had flair!
She was there! ♪♪

♪♪ That's how
she became the nanny! ♪♪

♪♪ Who would have guessed that
the girl we've described ♪♪

♪♪ was just exactly what
the doctor prescribed? ♪♪

♪♪ Now the father
finds her beguiling ♪♪

♪♪ Watch out, C.C.! ♪♪

♪♪ And the kids
are actually smiling ♪♪

♪♪ Such♪♪

♪♪ She's the lady in red ♪♪

♪♪ when everybody else
is wearing tan ♪♪

♪♪ The flashy girl
from Flushing ♪♪

♪♪ The nanny named Fran! ♪♪

[♪♪♪]

Sweetheart, thank God
you're home.

I have to warn you,
you're in terrible
danger.

Did Niles make a noodle kugel?

Ma, would you
concentrate.
Pretend you're full.

Did Aunt Freida call?

Yeah, she said her
apartment
was being painted.

So I said she could stay here.

Oy! I am too late.

-She's been thrown out of her
apartment, she is broke.
-[FRAN GASPS]

They even took her nightclub
to pay for her taxes.

No more Freida's Le Freak?

That place
was like an
institution.

Has the city no soul?

They're putting in a Loehmann's.

Oh, you know,
you really can't fight
progress.

She's hitting up
everyone in the family

for a place to stay.

How could this happen?

The woman's buried
five husbands.

You'd think that she can
live off what she found
in their old pants'
pockets.

What happened to Fred,
her millionaire
boyfriend?

Well, she's afraid,
if he knows that she's broke

he'll think that she's after
him
for his money.

Well, isn't she?

If she has a brain
in that fat head of hers she
is.

Poor Aunt Freida.

She came this close to making
it
as a singer...

and her damn boyfriend Steve
had to go meet Edie.

[DOORBELL RINGS]

Well, good luck getting rid
of Freida now.

She's like a Cesarean scar.
You'll have her for life.

-Fri.
-Syl.

So how are Morty's mumps?

-They still contagious?
-Very.

Fred, get out of the car.

He's so sweet
but he's such a
shmegegge.

Fred, honey, pull the knob up.

How could such ashmegegge
become so rich?

This from a woman
who voted for Ross
Perot?

Fred.

Fred, I'd like you to meet
my sister-in-law, Sylvia,

and her daughter, Fran.

I'm Sylvia.

I'm gonna go upstairs

and steam a couple of things.

Fred, would you like to come in?

Oh, no, no. I'm fine out here.

No, I've got a light, a
chair.
I don't want to be a
bother.

[DOOR CLOSES]

What do you know,
he's half Jewish.

♪♪ Will someone tell me
when it is my turn ♪♪

♪♪ Don't I get a dream
for myself ♪♪

♪♪ Starting now it's gonna
be
Mr. Sandman ♪♪

♪♪ Yes, bring me a dream,
boom-boom-boom-boom ♪♪

♪♪ I had a dream ♪♪

♪♪ A dream about you
and you and you ♪♪

And you, who needed
a little bite to
eat,

your 17-pound turkey is ready.

Excuse me. I'm taking
a short break.

Enjoy the buffet.

Well, now that
that's
taken care of,

I can go to my Yacht Club.

Speaking of turkeys...

how many arrangements
does that human karaoke know?

Well, that depends.
Has she already done
her
tribute to Chaka Khan?

C.C., would you mind leaving
us alone for a moment?

I'd like a word
with the
skipper.

Now, exactly how long is
your aunt's engagement
here
going to last?

Because we do have
another act coming
in

from the Nanny Agency.

Well, if you'll just
retract those veins,

I'll tell you
a perfectly good explanation.

There is no explanation

why that woman
is still in my
house.

A very wealthy and repressed man
is in love with her,

but he's not ready to commit.

Well, that's understandable.

Uh huh.

You know...
it's only
fair

that she give
him
plenty of time.

And how much time
are we talking?

I don't know.
Can't rush these things.

Yeah, well, I hope he
knows
that he doesn't have
forever,

because she's not gonna
wait around like some schlub

since she can't even
spit in this town

without hitting
some eligible classy guy.

Well, good bloody luck
to her catching one,

because men seldom date women
who say the word "schlub",

and rarely marry those who spit.

Did your big fat ears
get all that, Niles?

It's just me, Daddy.

-Oh, sweetheart, I'm sorry.
Do me a favor?
-Mm-hmm?

Tell the man with
the big fat ears next to you,
I'd like a drink.

-He said he wants a--
-NILES: I heard him.

Oh, thank you. Thanks.

All right. All right.
I'm leaving.

What was that about?

That woman tried to get in
with a Xeroxed membership card.

-It looked so phony.
-Oh, my God.

Well I'm surprised
she didn't dip it in tea
first

to give it that aged look.

Then you paste on
one of those magnetic
strips

from the back
of an old Blockbuster's
card

before giving it that
authentic
look of laminating it.

You wouldn't believe
what people will do to marry
up.

Oh, boy, you know,
that is so
superficial.

Give me a working man any day.

-What do you do?
-I'm a chauffeur.

That seat's taken.

Oh! Fred. Oh, Fred. Hi.

It's okay, Fred.
You can talk to me.

Oh, I don't want to bother you,

you look like you're in
the middle of something.

Yeah, my childbearing years.

Fred, come on over here, honey.

I didn't know you were a member.

-Oh, yes, yes, for years now.
-Oh.

This is my favorite time of day.

I love to come over and watch
the bartenders cut the fruit.

I don't know. When you're
rich,
they call it eccentric.

You know, Fred,
I'm really glad I ran into
you.

It's so obvious that, you
know,
you're a shy guy,

but you really feel
strongly
about Freida.

Why don't you pop the question?

Oh! Freida would never marry
me.
She's so vibrant, sexy.

I want whatever he's drinking.

-I really don't know
what she sees in me.
-Uh.

It's your eyes.

Besides, I could never give her

the kind of life
that she's used to.

Parties, nightclubbing...

I'm not a very exciting man.

-I can't even--
-Oh, Fred, don't be
embarrassed.

You know,
you can do other
things.

And, really, most
women
just like to cuddle.

I was going to say dance.

Ah.

Well, that's good because
that cuddle thing is a big
myth.

Oh, Fred, I can teach
you
how to dance.

A couple of private
lessons,
you'll sweep her off her
feet.

You must really love your
aunt.
She'd be moved.

Well, moving my aunt
is a big priority in my
family.

I should never have let you
teach me to mambo.

Oh, no, Fred, it's okay.

You know, in China,

women without toes
are considered
sexy.

Well, let's face it, Fran,

I'll never
be known for my dancing.

Nonsense, Fred.
You're very light on your
feet.

I'm sure there was a pair of
ski boots under here somewhere.

Look, let's forget
the whole thing.

Oh, no, no. Fred,

if you don't leave
here
with Freida,

I will regret it
for the rest of my
life.

Did I say I?

Let me demonstrate. Watch me.

One, two, three.
One, two, three.

Turn, turn, turn.
Shimmy, shimmy, shimmy.

Now, you try it.

[MAMBO MUSIC PLAYING]

I'll never be as good as you.

Don't compare yourself to me.

I was onDance Fever.

I'll just show you
a couple of steps

so you can fake it, okay?

One, two, three.

Hey, I kind of like that.

You're getting it.

Oh, whap!

Now, just keep
doing
the same thing

over and over again.

-Oh, whap!
-Well, not that.

That could get annoying.

-Fran, wait. Ooh...
-You're doing great.

There's something's
wrong with my arm.

Worry more about your feet.

-Really.
-Fred, not so close.

Don't tip me. Fred!

Fred. Fred.

Hello, Fred.

Oh, my God. Oh, my God.

Oh, my God. Oh!

Oh, my God.

Fred, I hope for your sake,
that's rigor mortis setting
in.

NURSE [OVER RADIO]:Dr.
Warner
wanted in Radiology please.

Can you believe
that she did this to me

under my own roof?

Oh, my Momma, I'm gonna faint.
Hold me.

Hold you?
I'm still paying for
this hip.

You happy, hot pants?

Don't you yell
at my daughter, Nettie.

What the hell is wrong with you?

Are you so
desperate
to get married?

[SHOUTS] Where is this insanity
coming from?

Mr. Sheffield is here.
Put some lipstick on.

Why won't anyone believe me?

I was just trying
to get those two together.

Just because he was lying on me
with romantic music

at 1:00 in the morning
doesn't mean...

You know, this would all be
a non-issue if I was running
opposite Dole.

I've got
an 8:00 a.m. appointment.

Niles, would you
let C.C. know what happened.

Oh, I already phoned her sir.

Told her a certain millionaire

suffered a heart attack
in Ms. Fine's bed.

C.C.: Maxwell!

-You're all right?
-Oh dear. You thought
I meant him?

He can have visitors now,
but he's weak

so you should only go in
one at a time.

-All right.
-Absolutely. We will.

-Thank you.
-Thanks for taking

-such good care of him.
-One at a time.

-We appreciate it.
-Go!

Fred.

Freddy.

It's your Freida-la.

Are you-- Are you all right?
Can you hear?

His color's not so good.

Well hat hose
you're standing on

might have something
to do with it.

You have the nerve
to speak to me?

I didn't do
anything.
I'm innocent.

Shh! Look, he's trying
to say something.

Fran, you're so good.

Put my leg where?

Where the heck is that hose?

You... You husband stealer, you.

Now, who's gonna
take care of me?

Where am I gonna live?

-Bed time.
-I made plans!

Any idea of Ms. Fine

being seriously involved
with Fred is absurd.

Oh, why do you say that, sir?

Come on, man, he's nice, but...

well, she couldn't be
interested inhim

What's so great about you?

I mean, what's so great
about you is your
ability--

-Oh, shut up.
-Right.

Of course it's only a
matter of time
before she does find someone

if she keeps
putting herself out there.

Do you think she's doing all
this just to spite me

for taking back the,
you know, thing?

Well, it's very difficult
to
say, sir, considering the
fact

I don't know
what the bloody thing
is.

Oh, well,
I might as well tell you.

[PHONE RINGING]

We'll get back to them.

First of all, no one else
must ever know

what I'm about to tell you.

All right. Let me see,

we were on our way
back from Paris.

And, well, I thought
we were about to die,

so I turned to Ms. Fine
and I told her I loved her.

Then I panicked, took it back
and, well, that's it.

So, now you know
what the thing is.

NILES: [FRUSTRATED SCREAM]

Fran, I refuse to
share
a bathroom with your
aunt anymore.

I brushed my teeth
with some chick
product.

Don't even want to
speculate
what that was.

Oh, what are you
complaining about?

There's like a
toenail
fromJurassic Park

in my bathroom.

And look at this.

Your aunt ate
the entire box of chocolates

that my boyfriend gave me.

Oh, don't worry, kids.

I'll take care of everything.

Nanny Fine, I didn't know

you were attracted
to decrepit old men.

Am I gonna have to keep my eye
on the two of you now?

In my day, two people
got to know each other first.

In your day,
there only were two people.

FRIEDA: Fran.

Franny, darling,

-Fred regained
consciousness,
he explained everything.
-Oh.

-And then he proposed.
-[FRAN CHUCKLES]

So can you ever forgive me?

-Did you accept?
-Yeah.

All is forgiven.

Oh! There you are. All packed.

Look, how excited
they are for me.

Not quite yet, my loves,

because, you know,
there's still so much to do.

And I haven't even decided

where I'm gonna
have the ceremony

now that I'm getting married.

-Hear, hear.
-Here?

Oh, you are a doll.

So I'm gonna go upstairs
and try on my old wedding gown.

Come on, kids, help zip me up.

I'll get the pliers.

All right. I--I know,
something just happened.

You just offered
to have Freida's wedding
here.

What? Well, why didn't you
bloody say something?

Oh, calm down.

Do you think that
I would subject you

to the horror
of a Fine family affair?

Not after what happened
Grandma Yetta's birthday
party,

which you know nothing about.
So what am I bringing it up
for?

Moving on. Moving on.

I can't believe I agreed

to let Freida
have her wedding
here.

-Oh, relax. I've got a plan.
-Oh, thank God.

First, I'll go out and buy
a dress for the wedding.

-Yes, right.
-Better give me
your credit card.

This way it looks like
you're going along with it.

Oh, right. Right.

-Okay now, while I'm doing
that,
you, this'll be a snap for
you.

-Go upstairs. Find Freida.
-Yeah. Uh-huh.

And take it back.

This is beautiful.

Why is it
families only get together

at weddings and funerals?

You know, you wore that
dress
to her last wedding.

I'm saving the new one
for yourshiva,

Well, we don't need
anything old or
blue.

I just shoved
Freida
into her corset.

[LAUGHTER]

-Fran, can I talk to you?
-Yes. Sure.

I can't go through with this.

Oh, Fred, now,
I don't want to
hear

that you're not
good enough for
Freida.

You're a wonderful guy.
I'd marry you in a
second.

Then marry me.
I think I'm in love with you.

Fred, don't be ridiculous.

You're just getting cold feet.

I'll give you anything
you ever wanted.
Yes, I'm worth millions.

This'll do.

No, Fred.

You don't love
me.
You love Freida.

You guys make a perfect couple.

There is nothing more
right
in this whole world.

This is so wrong.

You say anything to disturb
this ceremony and you're
dead.

And do you,
Freida Rubinski...
Mannarino...

...Chong'dow... Bitterman...

Excuse us. Coming through.
Excuse me just a minute.

-Thank you.
-I can't let Freida

-go through with this.
-Oh, yes, you can.

My house has turned into
a pest motel.

Where the Fines check in
but they don't check out.

You don't understand.

He doesn't want to marry her.
He said he loves me.

He's confused.

The man just had
a near-death experience.

He didn't know
what he was saying.

Wait a minute.
Let me get this
straight.

Now, you're taking it
back
for him?

Oh. You know,
maybe ignorance is
bliss.

Maybe I should just
let them be happy.

I mean, Freida's
been widowed five
times.

Maybe six will be
her lucky number, who
knows.

I do.

Fred. Fred.

-He said, "I do."
-[All TOGETHER] We heard him.

Oh, Mr. Sheffield, look,

Aunt Freida sent us a tape
from their honeymoon.

I can't believe
how well Fred recovered.

I know.
Doesn't he look
incredible?

Boy, that quadruple
bypass
really did the trick.

Make them laugh! Ha, ha!

Make them laugh! Ha, ha, ha!

Next week, I'm gonna teach
him
theMacarena.

[♪♪♪]

[THEME MUSIC PLAYING]