Original subtitles

We're sorry.

You have reached a number that has been--

I'm sorry, but the person you called

has a voice mailbox that has not been--

Hi, you've reached the Mill's residence.

Sorry we're not home right now

to answer your call, but please

leave a message after the sound of the beep.

Beep.

Hello, this is Don Gos

with the Sabean Development Partnership.

I'm calling about an exciting new opportunity

that has come up in your area.

Due to recent changes in the market

the state of precious metals has never been lower.

We're looking for some daring partners

to help take advantage of this opportunity

and come out ahead.

If you worry about your future

and would like to become independently wealthy

please don't hesitate to call us at 678--

We aren't interested.

- Hello? - Hi, yes,

is this Mr. Tyrell? - Yeah.

- Yes, this is Don Gos

with the Sabean Development Partnership.

I'm calling about an exciting

new opportunity that's come up--

Are you a telemarketer?

- No, no sir, I am a market analyst

looking for potential--

What's your name again?

Don Gos, sir.

I--

Can I ask you something, Don?

- Yeah, yes sir.

Are you happy?

- I don't know what you...

I-- - Are you happy?

Since you didn't immediately answer yes

I would assume you aren't happy.

And I can't blame you,

but here's the thing,

up until you woke me up about a minute ago

I was very fucking happy with my life.

I was happier than a fat kid on thanksgiving,

but then I had to be reminded

that there are people in this world

who make a living praying on idiots

too stupid to say "no thank you".

- I am very sorry to disturb you, sir.

I was just-- - Just stop, stop it.

Stop.

I'll tell you what, I'll buy 10

of whatever crap you're selling

if you can answer me one question.

- Okay.

- How disappointed are you with how your life turned out?

Fuck off!

Man, you're than box of owl shit.

Call me again, I'm going to find where you are

and shove this phone straight up your ass.

Whatever you're selling I don't fucking need it.

I don't fucking want it.

What the fuck is wrong with you?

Dumb son of a bitch.

I hope you die in a fire.

This is my mama's phone.

I am coming to get you man, you hear that?

How much of a piece of shit are you that this is all you do?

You just fucking call people at their home.

Get a real fucking job.

- I'm useless, I'm retarded?

Fuck you!

Fuck you, you neon fucking colored cocksuckers!

I hope all of you fucking burn in fucking hell!

Fuck!

What the hell?

Shit.

God.

Yeah, well, fuck you too.

媻 Soft blue

♪ And green

♪ Stretch along

♪ Reaching the road

♪ Straight and clean

♪ A ravine

♪ Full with love

Not in a bad way though.

I like it.

It actually fits my mood.

Bad day?

Yeah.

I...

Nothing worth talking about.

Mm, don't clam up on me again.

I swear if you weren't so sweet all the time

I might think you didn't like talking to me.

No, I love talking to you.

I just don't like talking about me.

We've been flirting for weeks, Don.

All we've really talked about is Hank Williams

and what's the best weapon for a zombie apocalypse.

A proton pack.

It's a lightsaber.

And don't try to change the subject.

I'm sorry.

I don't mean to be evasive.

I'm not used to all this.

What do you mean?

It's just been a long time

since someone paid attention to me.

Why do you think that is?

I've been in a bad relationship.

I've poured all my time and love

into someone who just wasn't there for me anymore.

And instead of moving on I stayed.

But why stay?

Why crucify yourself, Don?

媻 And now can't see

Because sometimes living a lie

is easier than being alone.

Or maybe, maybe it's because I'm weak.

Maybe because I'm an idiot.

I don't know.

You're not an idiot.

I don't let idiots buy me coffee.

And I want you to buy me coffee.

媻 The sky is opening up

♪ Like I've never seen before

♪ The clouds trickle out of sight ♪

♪ I spiral into the other side

♪ The sky is opening up

♪ Like I've never seen before

♪ The clouds trickle out of sight ♪

♪ But I spiral into the other side ♪

- You're going to the gym.

God dammit.

Man, don't do this.

You're just gonna come off weird.

What do you even say to her?

Her car!

Ask about her car.

™ª I'm gonna buy me a pistol as long as I am tall ♪

♪ I'm gonna buy me a pistol as long as I am tall ♪

♪ I'm gonna shoot poor Thelma

♪ Just to see her jump and fall ♪

♪ Going where the water

♪ Drinks like cherry wine

♪ I'm going where the water drinks like cherry wine ♪

♪ 'Cause this Georgia water tastes like turpentine ♪

♪ Yodelayheehoo

♪ Yodelayhee

Oh.

Oh, fuck.

Oh, fuck.

Oh, no.

Oh.

Oh my god, the tunnel.

No, no, no, no, no, no, no, no.

No!

Get it together, it's going to be fine.

Useless!

Oh, god.

Goooooo!

Go! GO! GOOOOO!

Come on.

Come on.

Come on.

Come on!

It's okay.

It's gonna be okay.

Someone's coming.

Someone is coming.

媻 Show me the way to go home...

♪ I'm tired and I want to go to bed ♪

♪ Had a little drink about an hour ago ♪

Fuck.

Hello?

Anyone?

Someone is coming.

Someone is coming.

Stay calm.

It's okay.

This tunnel was very narrow.

How are they gonna get to you?

It's okay, just fucking calm down.

You're not gonna fucking die.

It's gonna be all right. Just relax.

It's fine, just relax, it's okay.

You have water, you have fucking food.

It's okay, just relax.

You're gonna fucking die.

You're gonna fucking die.

You're gonna fucking die.

You're gonna be fine.

They're coming, someone is coming.

You're gonna fucking die here.

Someone is coming, someone is coming.

I don't want to fucking die here.

They're coming, someone is coming.

They're coming, someone is coming for you.

Gotcha!

Yes!

"That'll do, pig.

"That'll do."

What a mess.

Hey!

Hey.

Jackpot.

Got you.

Fuck.

Hey good looking, what you got cooking?

Oh.

Shit.

Someone is coming.

Fuck.

I don't even like bananas.

Look like clown dicks.

™ª Oh farewell and adieu to you fair Spanish ladies ♪

♪ Farewell and adieu ye ladies of Spain ♪

♪ For we've received orders for to sail back to Boston ♪

♪ And never more shall we see you again ♪

Oh god.

Oh fuck.

No.

No.

I fucking hate this car.

I fucking hate this tunnel.

I hate Robert Shaw.

I hate the Department of Transportation.

I fucking hate mountains.

I fucking hate you.

Just fucking crush me.

Crush me.

Come on!

Please, please, please.

Hello?

Can you hear me?

Hello?

Hello?

Are you there?

- Okay, hold on.

Fuck.

Oh god.

Come on.

Hello?

Hello.

- Oh.

It's so good to hear your voice.

How far are you guys?

Oh, it's just me.

And I guess about 10 feet of rock.

- I...

I don't understand.

You're not part of the rescue party?

No, I'm stuck like you.

Please, fucking, god damn.

God fucking dammit.

It's gonna be okay.

It's gonna be okay.

It's gonna be okay.

I'm Gym, by the way.

- Yeah, yeah.

Sorry.

I just...

I just really, really hate this fucking tunnel.

Yeah.

I'd say it's less than ideal.

- I'm sorry.

Are you okay?

Are you hurt or anything?

Oh no, I'm fine.

Hell, I feel at home.

- Yeah.

Real comfy.

You know, it's really, really nice to hear your voice.

It...

It was pretty lonely in here.

Well, you have someone to talk to now.

You all right?

- Yeah.

I guess so.

I just really, really wanted to get out, you know?

Just hold on tight.

You'll be all right.

- How much longer do you think they'll take?

Hell, I don't know Don.

The tunnel isn't very wide

so I'm pretty darn sure big heavy equipment won't fit.

Which means they're going to have to use little backhoes and diggers.

It'll take a good long while that way.

- But they are coming though right, you know?

They wouldn't just,

they wouldn't just abandon the tunnel, right?

They'll assume the worst and try to dig you out.

You just have to stay calm and hold on.

There's nothing else much to do.

- Yeah.

I guess you're right.

Well, it's probably best we get to know one another.

So where were you headed before the sky fell on you?

- You know, that's the real kicker.

I wasn't even supposed to be driving today.

My doctor, he said...

Well, I'm going through some things

and he said that I should join a gym, you know?

Meet some people, lose some weight.

It'd be good for me.

Well, it seems like it's not going to prolong

your life any, but the doctor was right

about you meeting new people.

- Yeah, but I don't want to die down here.

Oh don't be so gloomy, Don my boy.

You'll be laughing at this one day

when they're naming the new tunnel after you.

- I used to have a sense of humor myself before this--

You all right?

- Yeah.

I'm in the trunk of my car so it's a little cozy.

I've always liked that word.

Which?

Cozy.

It's one of the few words that sounds

exactly how it feels.

- Yeah, well, it's a word only realtors use

to describe properties meant for demolition.

You spend a lot of time around realtors?

- Yeah.

Used to.

I was one before the last crash.

And then I went looking for greener pastures.

Bigger and better things then, huh?

Yeah.

I'm about as well paid as a porn star with lockjaw.

What do you do?

- I'm a telemarketer for a precious metals investment group.

Oh, that doesn't sound so bad, Don.

- Well, I cold call people all day

until I can scare one of them

into buying silver for 150 % markup.

All right, nevermind.

That does sound pretty shitty.

- Yeah, well.

It's a job, right?

Does anyone really like what they do anyway?

Sometimes.

What would you like to do?

- I don't know.

I've always envied people that had dreams

and followed them, but that was never me.

Rarely do people know what they're good at.

Usually it finds them.

There is an easy way to find out though.

Yeah?

How's that?

You just ask yourself if the world was ending

in 24 hours and you were the only one that knew it

what would you do with your time?

Where would you go?

- Rome.

Definitely Rome.

Why there?

- Well, when I was a kid I saw..

What's it?

Why can't I think of the name?

It's got Gregory Peck in it.

Audrey Hepburn, she's a princess.

They're in Rome.

You know the movie I'm talking about?

It rings a bell.

- Yeah, anyway.

It's just your stereotypical love story, you know?

But I'm just this poor kid from nowhere

and I'm watching this movie

and I'm just, I'm just in love with it.

I'm watching this cool, handsome guy

and this beautiful woman

and they're running around this beautiful city

and I'm just all stars.

I just can't help but think, you know, I'm like,

if I can go there I can see all the things Peck saw

and I can touch all the things Peck touched.

It's all still there, you know?

And then I get older and I start thinking

it's not just Peck, it's thousands of people,

thousands of generations, they all touched these things.

They all saw these things.

And it's like a time machine.

It's just amazing.

Well, there you go.

There's your answer.

- What?

Travel?

You're out of your fucking mind.

Why not?

Other than being trapped in a trunk I mean.

- I don't have any money, Gym.

Just live, Don.

Forget the consequences.

Work as you move, turn tricks,

sleep in train cars, do what you have to.

- I'd make a miserable hobo.

Well, how free of misery are you now

doing what you're doing, Mr. Lockjaw?

- I guess you got me with that one.

It's worth the risk my friend.

You want to hear a happy story about following your dreams?

- Sure.

- Well, down in Macon there's this bank teller.

He gets a call from his wife while he's at work.

Seems the septic tank is backed up at home.

So he calls the repairman to come and take a look at it.

The next day the repairman shows up and digs up the tank.

After some troubleshooting he calls over the teller

and tells him, "Great news, your septic tank's okay.

"I found the problem.

"It was blocked with flushed condoms."

The teller stares at the repairman for a long time

with a lost and worried look about.

The repairman says, "It's okay buddy.

"Just put the condoms in the trash from now on."

The bank teller looks at him and says,

"I had a vasectomy 10 years ago.

"I don't use condoms."

- That's a good story, but I don't know

how your teller friend followed his dreams.

Oh the teller wasn't my friend.

My friend was the guy fucking the teller's wife.

Oh, you're an asshole, Gym.

I like you,

but you're an asshole.

I take that as a complement.

Let's celebrate.

- Shit.

Oh, fuck.

He was just three days away from retirement.

Gym?

Yeah, what's up, bud?

- A couple days ago when I hit my car horn

and I realized you were back here

I hit it because I was scared.

The tunnel is crushing my car and...

I don't know what to do.

Nothing much you can do.

Luckily a car's roof is pretty strong.

They're built that way in the event there was a rollover.

Just sit tight, it'll be okay.

- How do you stay so calm?

I'm so afraid.

There's nothing to be afraid of.

It's just death.

We all gotta do it.

- You sound like my old priest.

He'd say,

that death was nothing to be afraid of.

That it was just going home.

Shit.

Even if there was a heaven mine wouldn't be

fluffy clouds and pearly gates and all that shit.

What would be your heaven then?

- Before I met my wife it would've been

sex, drugs and rock and roll.

But I gave that up when I met her.

Now all I really love is movies.

I think my heaven would be

getting to live in a movie for forever.

One where good guys win and everyone goes home happy.

That sounds like it's probably a pretty good choice.

Do you know what my heaven would be right now?

A cold beer and a board game to play.

Shit, anything to pass the time.

- Hold on, I got an idea.

Ooh.

That's a tough one.

Okay, all right, I got it.

I'd fuck Eva Braun,

I'd marry Clementine Churchill

and I'd kill Eleanor Roosevelt.

Queen to g7.

Hm.

And knight to g5.

And who are my choices?

- All right, you've got to fuck, marry, kill...

Sean Penn, Hugh Jackman and Johnny Depp.

Queen to h6.

Yeah, I'd kill Sean Penn for sure.

So I guess I'll fuck Johnny Depp and marry Hugh Jackman.

- Oh yeah, good choices.

Sean Penn is just gonna mope around the house all day

going on and on about the plight of the Somali dog groomer

or some shit and you don't want to marry him.

Johnny Depp, amazing lay,

but he's gonna give you that look in the morning

like why the fuck are you still here?

Hugh Jackman.

Hugh Jackman was born to cuddle.

He tells you you're pretty every single day

and he fucking means it.

I've always liked the bad boys myself.

- Well, believe it or not

I used to be kind of a bad boy myself.

Yeah, you mentioned it.

Giving it up when you met your wife.

Did I?

I don't remember.

Yeah, I gave it up when I met my wife.

You all right over there?

- Yeah.

I'm just really tired.

You know, I've been thinking.

For all the talking we do

you sure don't talk much about your wife.

How'd you meet her?

- So one day I run into a friend of mine from high school.

We start catching up and chitchatting

and it turns out that he's throwing

a party at his place that night.

I got nothing better to do

and he's nice enough to invite me

so I said fuck it, I'll go, why not?

Well, I go and it's your average party.

It's nothing special, but it is kind of crowded

and I can see through the crowd my friend,

he's waving at me.

He wants to introduce me to his girlfriend.

Now I can't really see her all that well.

She's sitting down.

She's turned away from me,

but I introduce myself and she turns.

And she is the most beautiful woman

I've ever seen in my entire life.

I mean just way, way out of my league.

But she gives me this look.

Jesus, this look, she...

It's like looking into the sun.

I close my eyes and it's just burned into me.

I can still see it.

I didn't give a fuck who she was dating,

my friend, the president, it didn't fucking matter.

That look, it was enough.

I knew I had to have her.

So I threw on the charm and I spend

the rest of the night flirting with her.

And by some fucking miracle I get her number.

And I'm just over the moon.

I'm jumping up and down.

I try to play it cool, but I just can't.

I text her that fucking night

and we end up talking until the sun comes up.

And it's like that for a week solid.

Well, at some point in all of our chats

she tells me that she's going to kidnap me

and she's gonna take me away.

I tell her, "do it, pussy."

And she does.

She did it.

She pulled up one day, completely unannounced,

and she blindfolds me.

A few hours later we're at the beach.

She had arranged this entire

little weekend getaway for just us.

Didn't let me know.

Completely kidnapped me.

We spend the entire night just talking

and laughing and fucking.

The very next morning she made me the most amazing

French toast and I asked her to marry me.

I barely knew her, but I...

I didn't give a fuck.

It was the happiest day of my life.

That's a real sweet story, Don.

Real sweet.

The only thing I'm wondering is

why do you sound so sad telling it?

- She got pregnant and...

Listen, man, I don't really want to talk about it.

You can talk to me.

Why not, Don?

- I can't.

I just can't.

It's in the past.

It only has as much power as you give it.

Come on, talk.

- I just...

I just can't.

Why are you always poking me, man?

You're always poking me.

I can't.

I don't even know the first thing about you

and you're always poking me.

You want to know about me.

Well, I'm just in your head.

- What did you just say?

I said, I'm just your friend.

- No.

No, that's not what you just said.

What the fuck did you just say to me?

Gym, what the fuck did you just say to me, Gym?

Fucker, I know you're there.

What did you say to me?

Gym?

Gym?

It's gotta taste better than piss.

How long's it been?

Gym?

Gym?

You awake?

Yeah, buddy.

What can I do for you?

- How long do you think it's been?

Oh, no idea.

There's no real way of knowing.

- I'm not doing great.

I'm out of water.

I'm out of everything, and,

I don't know how much more I can take.

You thinking about handling things yourself?

- Yeah.

But I'm afraid.

You know what's the funniest word

in the English language?

Immortal.

Mostly because nothing's immortal.

You have a word for something that doesn't exist.

Even the stars, even atoms, they all die.

What matters is how you live.

- I thought you'd try to talk me out of it.

You know why God hates suicide?

Because it's the one time you can take control of your life.

I mean really take control.

You can't decide when your life starts

or whether or not shit happens to you,

but you can control when it ends if you want to.

It's your life, Don, my boy.

I'm not gonna try to stop you.

Just do what you know is right.

- Gym?

Yes?

- Thank you for being my friend.

Oh, Don, you don't have to thank me for that.

- Gym?

Yeah?

- Are you re--

Gym!

Gym!

Gym!

Gym!

Fucking answer me.

Please...

Gym, no.

You asked me before what happened with my wife.

I killed her.

I killed her and my baby girl.

Let's celebrate.

They uh...

They tried to save the baby, but...

It was too little.

I looked back just for a second.

It was just a second and...

I'm so tired, Gym.

I'm so tired.

I do this my way.

I do this my way.

Good evening, Mr. Gos, I'm Dr. Goodwin.

And how are you feeling today?

Are there any headaches or nausea?

Mr. Gos.

I understand that you went through a lot.

If you need, we have councilors on staff

that are more than willing to--

Hey, you need a cab?

Credit card okay?

Yeah.

Where to?

- The Hamptons on Sandy Plains.

Driver, I changed my mind.

Keep going straight.

- So where do you want to go?