Original subtitles

Episode 14

Dad!

After your tips, the power of the Toad Skill martial art has increased greatly.

That's right. Looks like I taught you well.

Rotten rascal.

You have gotten the main point of it. That's good! Now, I am determined to that

I will teach you the number one martial arts form, Nine Yin True Classic.

Nine Yin True Classic?

Son.

This Nine Yin True Classic is the number one martial arts form.

It is an amazing book. Don't let others know about this.

Okay.

Now dad is going to teach you one part of the world's number one martial art.

This Nine Yin True Classic needs gas.

Gas?

Dad.

The Nine Yin True Classic that you are teaching me is what the kids learn.

Bastard!

In this world, there is only one Nine Yin True Classic and that's your father's. Would there be another one?

It's not that, dad.

You taught me to let the force of the air go up against the blood flow.

But what I have learned is to stay in the focal point and flow downward.

Rotten rascal, what are you talking about?

Keep breath below the public region. Next open turtledove tail acupuncture point.

That's right.

How is that possible?

You rascal

This isn't the Nine Yin True Classic that I practice

How is this possible?

You are lying to me!

Dad?

Dad!

Dad, I finally caught you. Can you not go crazy again?

Dad, there is a possibility that there are two Nine Yin True Classics in this world.

How could it be that there are two Nine Yin True Classics? There is clearly only one!

It can't be.

Arts of the Nine Negations, let me tell you.

- Dad, stay calm, okay? - Don't tell me to stay calm. It's not true!

Who am I?

Dad.

I'm begging you not to go crazy again.

Aunt, why are you here?

Aunt.

Guo Er.

I know my father must have immbolised your acupunture points.

He must be afraid that you would see him training his martial arts. That's why he did this to you.

Don't mind him. He has a problem with his brain. That's why he does crazy things.

I say, you are the one who does crazy things instead.

Me?

Why are you still calling me Aunt?

If I don't call you Aunt, I will call you Teacher then.

If you already did this to me, how could I still ask you to call me your Teacher?

What did I do to you?

Take a look yourself.

Aunt, I really don't understand. What do you mean by this?

I already told you not to call me Aunt and you are still calling this that.

All members of the Ancient Tomb sect,

when we joined, the teachers will leave a Gecko mark on our hand.

- By doing what you did, the Gecko mark has already disappeared. - Huh?

In future, no matter where you go, I will be with you.

Are you saying this for real, Aunt?

Why are you still calling me Aunt? Are you being cruel to me?

- Aunt, what's wrong with me again? - Guo Er, let me ask you.

Who am I in your heart?

Aunt, In my heart, you are my Teacher. You are the one who treats me the best and the Aunt I will always be with in my life.

I already told you not to call me Aunt.

You are not going to be my teacher anymore? why?

Haven't you always thought of making me your wife?

Wife?

Are you kidding? I have never thought of this.

You have never thought of this?

Teacher and Granny Sun used to say that

In this world, each and every man are fickle and heartless.

It's all my fault, instead for not listening to them, I thought Guo-er is different to them.

Seems like all crows are just as black as one another.

GuGu.

He is a man. How could he be an exception?

It was I who was too foolish.

I was too foolish.

Aunt, what's wrong with you?

Aunt, what's wrong with you?

Yang Guo.

I don't ever want to see you again.

Aunt!

- Aunt! - Rotten rascal, come back here!

Aunt!

Tell me, was it, keep breath below the public region. Next open turtledove tail acupuncture point?

- Wait a minute first. Mine is the real Nine Yin True Classic, yours is fake! - Aunt.

- Let me go! - Okay, who is your Aunt?

Also rascal, tell me who exactly is Ou Yang Feng?

Ouyang Feng? Who am I?

- Stay calm, okay? - Who am I?

- Who am I? - Oh my God.

Aunt!

Where are you going?!

Dear customers, please take care.

Please come again next time.

Waiter. Did you see a pretty and delicate girl dressed in white?

Are you referring to the one who's very good in martial arts?

Yes, that's her.

That maiden, even though she's beautiful like a fairy,

but she's just a bit too fierce.

That two Taoists, just because they looked at her legs,

they had their ears cut off.

Who was that Taoist?

They are from Quan Zhen sect.

Waiter.

Customer, what would you like to eat?

- Two bowls of vegetarian noodles. -Okay, please wait.

That woman in white is alone and she still dared to fight with us.

It must be a trap.

Don't worry.

Shen Brother Teacher has already asked two friends from the Begger's Clan to help us.

Even if this white clothed girl has three heads and six arms (means superhuman powers).

I think she may not be our match.

This woman's martial art is really excellent. I wonder which sect she is from.

Looking at how excellent her skill was, she must be from the Ancient Tomb sect,

Ancient Tomb sect?

It must be really Aunt.

You rotten wench. You still have the guts to show up?

Call all your people out now.

To deal with the few of you trivial "bags-of-good-for-nothing", is it necessary to find other people to help?

The Quan Zhen sect holds no grudges with you.

Why did you injure the members of the Quan Zhen sect?

You should blame that two rotten Taoists for being rude to me.

Nonsense. We were only just looking at you? How would we know that you have a limp?

So, it's not Aunt. They even said that it was a beauty in white dress.

Yes, it a white dress and it's a woman but she's far from being a beauty.

You are not even worthy of my Aunt.

You rotten wench. You are too supercilious.

Exactly how do you address the Red Practice Fairy Li Mo Chou?

If you don't tell me the truth, I won't be polite with you.

Cut the nonsense. If you are capable, bring it on now!

I separated from my Aunt because of Li Mo Chou and you still want to drag some sort of relationship with Li Mo Chou ?

Alright, you impersonate my GuGu, you're so hateful, I'll let you fend for yourself.

You stinking men, take advantage of someone's precarious position, numerous against one.

You are shameless. Are you a man or not?

Many against one, indeed ought to not happen.

Help me!

Move aside! This bull is crazy!

I can't stop him!

Help me!

Be careful.

This bitch must definitely have accomplices near by waiting to ambush us.

Let's leave.

Thinking of running away when you can't beat me? Do you think I can't catch you?

Don't leave. You scared away my bull. My family will scold me.

- Let me go. - Compensate me.

I didn't imagine that when she's angry, she's like my Aunt.

That's also great. If I can't find my GuGu, seeing this little girls angry expression is also fun.

If you don't pay me for the bull,

I will be very pitiful.

Do you have to go so far?

Okay, I will give it to you.

You are a good person.

I want to ask you, how far is it form here to the nearest small town?

- You will reach it in half a day. - I'll have to walk half a day?

I'm not talking to you anymore. I'm going to the market to buy a bull.

Wait a minute.

Do you want to earn more silver?

Yes.

Go with me to the market and this silver is yours.

Come then.

Lunatic.

Go now.

We have been walking for three hours. I'm dead tired.

I'm carrying you and you are still tired?

Okay, put me down.

Did you hear me? Are you deaf?

Rotten rascal, you did that intentionally, right?

Didn't you tell me to put you down?

Forget it, I won't argue with you.

Don't leave so fast. Keep me company.

Are you kidding? You want me to accompany you? Move aside.

Help me!

- She beat me. - What are you doing? What nonsense are you spouting? - I have bee married to her for so many years.

She beats and scolds me every day. Today she wants to leave me. I really want to die.

What a scandal.

- What sort of nonsense are you sprouting!? - The manners and morals of the times are changing!

In broad day light, to go against the heavens, a girl hitting his man until he is rolling on the ground.

- What a scandal! - That's right!

Who are you? What nonsense are you spouting?

Even if he 's your husband, you can't do this to him.

You are too toxic. You can't behave like a cat and dog.

I can beat anyone I like. Mind your own business.

As the proverb says, a hundred years to repair the same boat you cross the river with, a millennium to repair the common pillow one sleeps on. I can beat anyone I like. Mind your own business.

As the proverb says, a hundred years to repair the same boat you cross the river with, a millennium to repair the common pillow one sleeps on.

You... are a tigress.

- I'm a what? - A King supports that a husband is his own master.

How can you treat your husband like that...you... you are too much!

He is my...

I'm tell you, if you were my wife, you would have already been drowned in the river locked in a pigs cage.

That's right, drowned in the river locked in a pig's cage!

Drowned in the river locked in a pig's cage!!!

Rotten rascal, what exactly are you doing?

- Let me go. - Are you still going to beat me?

I won't beat you anymore.

Thank you, everyone.

Live happily. This should be the way.

Come, have a chicken leg.

I'm not eating.

If you don't eat now, you will be hungry later. Come, eat this.

I'm telling you that I'm not eating. I'm warning you. If you don't leave this place tomorrow, I will kill you.

I am not intentionally following you. But I have no home and no family to return to.

Where are your parents?

I have been an orphan since I was young.

I don't have a family anymore.

I still have an Aunt.

What Aunt? My family name is Lu.

What did you say?

Your family name is Lu?

That year, Li Mo Chou abducted a young girl with the family name, Lu.

Moreover, she knows the Ancient Tomb sect's martial art. This is a coincidence.

What are you looking at?

Why don't you ask me for my name?

Does it concern me what your name is?

If you don't even know what your husband's name is, people will laugh at you.

I'm warning you. If you take advantage of me again, I will kill you. Did you hear that?

I'm afraid. Don't kill me.

So, you are actually a stupid egg.

How did you know that my name is Stupid Egg?

- Your name is really Stupid Egg? - That's right. Everyone calls me Stupid Egg.

In future, you can call me Stupid Egg Husband.

Okay, you are taking advantage of me again. Come here!

- Help me. - Stop running away.

Help me.

Wife is beating the husband? Everyone, come and take a look.

- See how I deal with you! - Everyone, come and take a look at this girl with a limp!

What's wrong? You can't move?

Did you see a ghost? You immobilise my points. Moblise me now.

I'm telling you. You just immobilise my points.

Mobilise me now. Did you hear me?

I immoblised your points? Where are they?

- Over here? - No, don't touch me.

- Don't remove my dress. - Where is it?

I'm warning you.

Why are you looking under my dress? You pervert!

- Help me! - I'm helping you to mobilise your points. Where are they?

- Over here? - Stop fooling around.

Where are they?

Is it here?

So, the little thief is here.

Wife, since your pressure point got pressed, you're at their mercy!

Shut up.

Heaven is really helping us now.

Rotten wench.

You finally have what is coming to you.

Brother's, remember the person who owes you, has to pay the debt.

Whoever had offended you, you should going find that person to settle the score with? Run!

Taoist, what should we do with her?

Cut off her ears. Let's see if you will still remember this in the future.

Are you leaving or not?

We will leave.

Dare to cut my wife's ears? Are you looking down on her husband?

She's not dead yet.

Where are they?

They thought you were dead and left.

What are you laughing at? Take pleasure at other people's misfortune. No wonder you are called Silly Egg.

This is called, an evil person to have, is an evil person who's polished, wifey. What are you laughing at? Take pleasure at other people's misfortune. No wonder you are called Silly Egg.

This is called, an evil person to have, is an evil person who's polished, wifey.

You are still calling me that?

You suffered a blow and broke your rib. Do you want me to set your bones?

You know how to set bones?

Don't think I'm stupid?

I have a dog called Wang Pai in my home. Two days ago, he kept running and running.

He suddenly slipped.

- He dislocated his leg. Do you know how painful it was? - What are you doing?

Also, don't think I'm foolish. Mother Wang from the nearby village had a sow.

Two days ago, the sow also...

her tail was broken by someone.

I also help the sow fix her tail. With my great skills, the sow was able to go back to the other sows.

You are the sow instead!

Think over carefully whether you want me to heal you or not.

You really know how to set the bones

My condition is very simple. As long as you are willing to call me a big hero one hundred times,

I will do it.

You big Stupid Egg, dream on!

It's like that then!

It can't be that this Stupid Egg can really set the bones?

But if no one can fix my bones, then I am permitting to death.

But if he's going to set my bones, he will be touching my chest.

Then, what should I do?

Forget it, if he can't heal me, then he'll have to die with me.

Even if he heals me, I will not let him live.

Big Hero.

Big Hero.

Big Hero!

It's only three times.

You still owe me ninety seven times.

I'm coming.

What are you doing?

Why are you shouting?

How could I set your bones without undressing you? A female dog and a sow don't wear clothes too!

You should have told me earlier. Why are you so fierce?

Come.

Okay, stop nagging.

The little thief must be in there. Let's take a look.

It's my teacher.

I know. It's my teacher.

I know.

What should we do?

Just now, sticking out of that stinking beggar's body was indeed Sector Sister's silver arc sword.

The one who injured them must be Sector Sister. Just now, sticking out of that stinking beggar's body was indeed Sector Sister's silver arc sword.

The one who injured them must be Sector Sister.

Teacher.

There are ashes here.

This little thief stole my Five Poison Codex.

We must catch her fast. If those rotten Taoists are telling the truth,

then this little thief must be here.

Little thief, you are actually here.

You betraying. I must do the clean up on behalf of my teacher.

Did I tell you to kill her?

Little thief. I raised you and taught you.

Never thought that when your winds have harden, you will bite the hand that feeds you.

I spit on you!

When you killed my parents,

If I haven't acted stupid at that time, I would have died in your hands.

All along, I have endure humiliation in order to carry out an important mission. Just waiting for today to take revenge!

Take revenge?

What right do you have to do that?

I just hate that heaven has no eyes, won't let me stab my enemy to death with my own hands.

All people with the name Lu, are brutal, cold-blooded and ungrateful!

Stop your crap. If you want kill me, do it then.

Okay.

I'll satisfy you, bastard and send you to see your parents.

but hand over the Five Poison Codex first.

Five Poison Codex?

The Beggar Clan took that away.

Ling Bo, search her.

Yes.

Go after them.

Be careful.

Kneel down.

She...

Your teacher is here. Keep quiet.

Where did they go?

She is injured. She won't be able to run far. Let's continue with our chase.

You scared me to death.

Your teacher lied to you.

Looks like the little thief is really not here.

Teacher, what should we do then?

Let's look over there.

It really hurts.

Stupid Egg.

You are amazing. Fortunately, I have you or else I won't be alive.

This is called dumb people have dumb luck.

This place is not suitable to stay long. I'll quickly cure your wounds and then I'll carry you away.

I'm starting now.

Are you afraid of pain?

No.

Just bear with it. It won't really hurt.

I... do it on your own.

I'm done.

What?

I'm done!

What are you looking at? Close your eyes now!

Okay, I'm closing my eyes. Don't scream.

Can we do it now?

Okay.

What are you doing? Where are you touching? The rib is lower.

I know, I know.

Is it done yet?

Okay, it's done.

Let me stabilize your ribs

It's done.

So how?

Do you feel better? It's not that painful anymore, right?

It's much better.

Thank you.

By the way,

Stupid Egg,

I have a book here. Help me to take care of it.

Five Poison Codex?

My teacher went on a rampage all over the world.

Everyone is afraid of her Ice Silver Needle's hyper toxins.

This book has the details in writing,

on how to make the antidote for the poison.

If this leaks out.

my teacher will be like the serpent without the poison.

Hence, if she can't find this book, she won't kill me.

You are speaking too soft!

Okay.

I will help you to take care of this book.

Now that I have set your bones, where do you plan to go?

I plan to go to Jiang Nan.

Do you want to go with me?

I'm not going to Jiang Nan. I want to find my Aunt. I'm afraid that Jiang Nan is too far, I wouldn't be able to find her.

Leave then and find your Aunt.

I'm fine. So what if I die?

What are you doing again?

Come, I will take you to Jiang Nan.

Didn't you just say that you are going to look for your Aunt?

I hope that my good deed will be repaid and it will help me to bump into my Aunt in Jiang Nan.

Come.

Stupid Egg.

What is your name?

Don't let me keep calling you Stupid Egg in front of everyone.

I don't have a name. I'm just called Stupid Egg.

If you don't want to tell me, then forget about it.

Who is your teacher?

My teacher is my Aunt.

So, your martial art is inherited. Which sect is your teacher from?

My Aunt is my family. She doesn't belong to any sect.

Pretending to be stupid, right? I'm asking you, what is the name of the martial arts your teacher taught you.

My teacher taught me the martial arts but she didn't tell me the name.

What martial art did she teach you?

She only taught me martial arts. She didn't tell me what it was.

What?

What?

What?

What?! What?!

Maybe he is stupid. His martial art is good, but the person is dumb witted.

Stupid Egg, wait a minute. Let me ask you a question. You must answer me truthfully.

Why are you being so good to me and even saved my life?

Because you are my wife.

Why are you taking advantage of me again?

Let's go.

Did you hear me?

In future, don't call me that again.

Look at you, your dirty appearance,

You really smell too.

Since when I smell? I don't smell at all.

Sit over there and eat.

You come so close to me, I can't even eat. Go now!

She's here. Let's go over.

Miss, please donate some food to us.

Any spare food will be appreciated.

Miss, you might as well obediently come with us, this matter has to have an end.

What exactly do you want to do?

What we are trying to do?

What's the situation?

Let's go.

Ridiculous. Why did they all disappear?

You didn't donate to then so they left.

How is that possible?

Stupid Egg.

Sister, someone wanted me to give this to you.

Thanks.

Don't mention it.

Li Mo Chao, in a blink of an eye, is quickly approaching. Run away!

It's so scary!

Why do this handwriting looks so familiar?

Where have I seen this?

Let's run away now.

Where would we run to?

Look, it's a bridal sedan.

What a happy occasion. They are getting married.

What are you looking at?

I wanted to know how it feels to be a bridegroom.

Stupid Egg, what nonsense are you spouting?

Don't come over here, wife.

This hero, what do you want?

Are you the bridegroom?

Yes.

If you don't want anything to happen to the bride groom, play a game with me and my wife.

Did you see a girl with a limp?

No.

The bride groom has luck.

Teacher, she has probably gone into the city.

Let's leave.

Ridiculous.

What is this?

How could we run into such a thing?

Bride, come out.

Wife, come out.

Stupid Egg, we were lucky just now.

How did you guess that my teacher would do that?

Your teacher is highly suspicious. She won't believe that you are not in there and will return to check. But don't worry, she has already left.

You Stupid Egg, aren't you a big fool?

I got beaten by my wife. I changed from a fool into a smart guy.

You are taking advantage of me again.

Let's go.

Congratulations.

Hope you are compatible, hope you have lots of children quickly.

- Wife, let's go. - What are you doing?

Everything's fine, I'm here.

I especially ordered you some pig trotter soup. Eating like will nourish like. Drink it well.

Why did you hit me?

You dare to call me a pig?

I saw that you are injured. I specially ordered pig bones soup to help you to recover your health.

You really are a dog, who is ungrateful to good intentions.

You even called me a dog!

You are doing it again. You even called me a dog!

You are doing it again.

Dear customers, this way up, please.

Wifey, do you want to see what it's like to take up revenge.

You have an idea?

We definitely have to find her so we can avenge the wrong doing.

Listen carefully to me. For the sake of Quan Zhen Sect, don't even mention another word of this again.

Haven't you been embarrassed enough?

Yes, teacher.

Don't worry. Beggar's Clan disciples are situated all over the land.

Even if she runs to the four corners of the earth, I will still take revenge.

I don't need to go to the four corners of the earth.

I'm now right in front of you. What are you going to do?

They broke your ribs. I will take revenge for you.

Okay.

Let me ask you. Did you see a girl with a limp passing by here?

Oh no. My teacher is already here.

There is only one solution.

What is it?

Do you dare to take a bet?

What are you going to bet on?

My teacher is asking you if you have seen a girl with a limp passing by here.

I wonder how this girl is related to you, Old Madam?

Old?

If you don't tell the truth, you will end like the table.

Spare my life.

Hurry up and take us to each room so we can search.

Yes.

Teacher, don't be angry. This way, please.

Hurry up.

Li Mo Chou, what are you thinking of doing again?

So, it's the rotten Taoist again. Don't worry, I'm not looking for you today.

Let's leave.

They have already left.

Do you think my teacher fell for it?

First impressions are the strongest. She's seen these three stinking Taoist so she won't be suspicious anymore.

Let's escape now.

The most dangerous place is where the safest place is. Let's not go anywhere tonight. We are staying here.

Here? What about that three rotten Taoists?

I have a solution.

Why are you lying here?

I'm going to sleep here.

You are not telling me that I should sleep on the same bed with you?

If not then?

Then let us make three rules. If I'm to sleep with you in the same bed, you are not allowed to touch me.

You cannot take advantage of my precarious position. You cannot molest me. Otherwise if I see hands, I'll chop off hand, if I see feet, I'll chop off feet.

I will rip your body into five, leave you without an intact body. Do you understand?!

Did you hear me?

If I were to kiss her lightly, she definitely wouldn't know.

Yang Guo, you lost Aunt and you are still having wild thoughts. You deserved to die.

Stupid Egg, why are you hitting yourself?

Can't you see that there are mosquitoes here?

Is that so?

Where are they?

Does it hurt again?

If this continues, we will be caught by your teacher sooner or later.

If you are afraid, just leave me alone.

No one told you to associate yourself with me.

With just me alone, it's hard to protect you. Understand?

You are really a big Stupid Egg!

Why are you standing here like a fool? Let's leave now.

I thought of an idea where many people can protect you.

Many people can protect me?

Stupid Egg,where are we going and what are we doing?

Tell me quick.

Ayo, what are you doing bringing me here. A single man and a single woman.

What are you doing?

What are you doing to do?

You both...

Who are you?

Come to my estate. What do you want?

Just now you were pricked by my poison needle. Amongst the poisons of the world.

Those who are poisoned by me, every day,

With in 6 days, your muscles and veins will expand, and then you'll explode and die.

Did the Empress sent you here to kill me?

Empress?

I've already retired from the court and not be involve with palace politics.

Why does the Empress still want to assassinate me?

Is your position high, even the Empress has to respect you.

His estate is so massive, of course you'll know his position is high.

That's right. He must be very rich.

Don't tell me the Empress really didn't send you?

Even if I die today, I must die with an understanding (clear on why I am going to die).

I don't know the Empress well. Wife, do you know her well?

Big Stupid Egg, you are taking advantage of me again.

If the Empress didn't send you,

Then why did you break into my estate. For what reason?

To be frank, we are being pursued by our enemies who wants to kill us. So we just want to hid in your estate.

Just wondering if senior can be accommodating?

I'm afraid I'll implicate you two. I have offended the palace court officials.

Any time, any place, you will be implicated and have death upon you.

If I allowed you to stay, then you'll end up the same as Yang Ji Chi (historical figure who was beheaded).

Oh so you have fallen from grace. Alright then, I won't make it difficult for you.

Senior, this is the antidote.

Many thanks.

Senior, may I ask you for your name?

My name is Ye Lu.

You can't be the Mongolian Prime Minister, Ye Lu Chu Cai?

Yes, I'm him.

Prime Minister?

Dad, you are back.

See who else is here.

Dad.

Jin Er.