Original subtitles

♪

♪

[cheering and applause]

Welcome back. I'm Kelley Frakes.

Mayor of River Creek. [laughs]

Now I've been speaking today to local bookstore owners

Katrina and...

Gbenge. The G is silent.

That's a very tough name for me.

Okay, I-I'm here to help you.

Just say, "Bang."

Bang...

"Guh. Gbenge."

Ben Bradley. Great to have you.

Not even trying.

We'd love for you to stop by and put some money

back into the north side economy.

I give money to the organizations

that benefit both sides of town.

Like the River Creek Irish Heritage Foundation.

Listen, Mayor, we all know the south side is the rich side...

Uh, what my husband means is,

you could actually help the north side if you...

River Creek.

This weekend the Industrial Furnishing Convention

is coming to our little town.

It's a chance for our industrial furnishing businesses

to score major clients

like hotel chains, fast food chains

or prisons.

Y'all can thank me at the polls, River Creek.

God bless.

I-I'm trying to drive here, Debbie.

I got to get my Dad to showcase

some of my awning innovations at that convention.

I know if Daddie just gave me a shot,

I could make us all rich.

But Daddie Dan hates your ideas.

No, no, no. I just got to talk to him at this barbecue

without your Aunt Brenna around.

She always wants to undermine me, and I don't know why.

She's bored so she messes with you.

Yep. She's your opposite.

All subtext. You're all text.

Same as how Roy is my opposite

in our unspoken competition for best son-in-law.

[chittering]

Well, Debbie. Yes.

Daddie usually goes to the I.F. Con

as the face of the family's awning store, but...

Daddie Dan lost his voice

from yelling and yelling,

five Crowns in,

with all his golfing buddies.

So I got to talk for him.

Then I'll go in his place!

Oh, come on.

I got ideas of how to grow this business.

Plus, wait for it,

I got Town Cloud,

which is a citywide awning

that all buildings in a town will share.

Ha!

No? Yeah, uh, that's okay.

I can keep Town Cloud to myself.

But, listen, Daddie,

I promise I won't let you down.

This weekend I, I will even work my way

through the small halls all the way up

to do a presentation in the fabled Hall C.

You know what?

She might just be able to pull this off,

Daddie.

Whoa. Brenna!

You are like Loki.

I never know why you're doing anything.

And almost always the good things you do do for me

are just tricks to make me--

the Thor in this scenario-- look foolish

in front of our wise, old, kind Daddie.

Anybody else see our relationship this way?

See, that crap right there.

What? There should be some representation

at the Con for Daddie's company.

[crunch]

You can have a bite if you want one.

No, thanks, Roy. I'm waiting

for the barbecue like a gentleman.

[snarling]

[grunting]

Hey, Ollie, is this the best you can do?

[sighs] My skills may be adrenaline-based.

I suck at practice.

And golden boy Roy is your coach?

Yeah. The south side doesn't have a soccer team

'cause the rich kids all do virtual sports.

And the rec center is named after him,

due to his career in the NBA.

Ah, short-lived.

You got to say "short-lived career in the NBA."

In his first season in the pros, he got injured,

so he sucks in my book.

[knocking]

Hi, on behalf

of the Irish Heritage Foundation,

I'm selling coupon pages

for spectacular bargains and free shit

at all the major fast food brands.

The Irish Heritage Foundation?

Yeah, it's an organization in town

that supports local charities.

The coupon page is $20,

but it pays for itself.

Oh, uh, well, you know, I-I don't know

if I have any cash, really.

Come on, man. You're white.

Are you saying that you don't have money for a girl like me?

Oh, God, okay, l-l-look, you're right, you're-you're right.

You know what, I'm dumb. So dumb!

[chuckles] One sec. Okay, look, here's 20 bucks.

Thanks, mister. Say hello to your kids for me.

What did Shauna want?

Ah, nothing. She just sold me

some coupons for 20 bucks.

20 bucks? Aw!

You never bought my Girl Scout Cookies

back before I got kicked out of Girl Scouts

for eating all my cookies.

Listen, I couldn't say no, okay?

I'm pretty sure she just took advantage

of your white guilt, Dad.

Todd, Dad's life's dream is to have Black friends

and to have all Black people like him.

Then why didn't we see any Black people in real life

until we moved to the north side?

I mean, isn't that a bit racist?

No, see... [chuckles] no, no, no.

That's Shauna Bradley.

I mean, I'm smart, but she's cunning.

And resourceful.

All the teachers are scared of her at school.

She's got 'em all where she wants 'em.

Whatever, she's just a kid.

♪

Brenna!

Why are you here?!

You don't even work for Daddie!

This is my thing.

Hello to you, too.

Daddie wanted me to come

just for support.

Oh, hon.

Let's loosen this look up a little.

[groans] Get off, get off, get off, get off!

Come on, just bust out those Buenos Dairies.

Not here.

'Cause of your Areola Grandes?

Ha. No!

Not really.

What are you saying? Are they big?

Now, look.

Wow.

Yes. Okay, fine, you did good.

To be fair, I'm hot raw material, so don't get cocky.

Oh, what's going on here

with this neat thing, little missy?

Um, it's called innovation, bud.

And I ain't your little anything, okay?

All right.

Debbie, you probably won't accept this,

but men want women

to be... a certain way.

You're right.

I don't accept that.

Sure, sure, sure, sure, sure, sure.

Such integrity, such integrity.

Such integrity will keep you from selling your ideas

and will keep you from keeping your promise to Daddie.

All right?

[groans, mutters]

All right... go on, hurry up.

Small adjustments.

One little technique mainly.

Baby talk.

Ha! Fuck no.

Girl, aren't you smart enough to act dumb?

Here, watch that gal

from Awn Point sell awnings.

[giggles]

Aw, thanks.

I was hoping a nice man would compliment my figure.

FREDDIE: Remember, kids.

To celebrate your first practice,

all this is on Freddie.

KIDS: Yay!

How about, um,

yeah, I'll take a 16-piece family meal

and a small Diet Coke,

and three dozen honeys.

Well, fast food is killing the planet,

but... butterfly shrimp surf and turf tackle box combo,

heavy turf.

Oh, I want the prawns, Prawn-ald McDonald.

Man, I'll get whatever the chef recommends.

Wait, a sandwich meal!

I'll have a five-piece extra-spicy to-go

with this here turkey sammy.

Hey, thanks, Freddie, for paying for everyone.

Ah, Roy, don't mention it.

So, I-I want to use these, uh, coupons

to pay for this massive order.

Sir...

those coupons are a proven scam.

Hiss! No, it isn't!

No... [stammers] you're a racist

for saying that, even!

Oh, well, a boom, boom, boom, Freddie, what's going on?

Hey, I know you. You're Roy Livingston.

You're a pro. [laughs] Oh, yeah.

Your dude here is trying to pay

for this massive order with scam coupons.

Hush! [stammers]

No, these are not a scam.

Okay, look, a cute little Black girl sold these to me, okay?

So, yeah, I don't feel very comfortable

thinking that's even possible, okay?

Oh, hey, listen, little Freddie, I can pay, man.

I'm still pretty rich from my stint in the pros.

Short-lived, injury boy.

[scoffs] I got it.

[exhales, grunts]

[clears throat]

So, uh, yeah. Traditional awnings suck.

My designs provide shade on your target area

for 96% of the day

because they self-adjust to follow the sun

across the sky, right?!

And they're solar-powered. So win-win.

What's the second win?

You get it. You! Hey, you!

You get it. Say you get it.

[groans] Get what, lady?

Your tone is so unlikable,

I can't pay attention.

[men muttering]

Jesus, you're like Shrek out there.

All mean and gross.

Those fucks are trying to rile me.

Just try to act cute, a little.

Come on.

Be little Debbie.

Fucking Loki.

[clears throat] Well, the...

sun is a big meanie.

[chuckles] And my silly ideas

are a cute way to not sunburn my cheeks.

-[men gasp] -[laughs] No.

These cheeks.

[sighs]

-Aha! -Now I get it.

How smart.

I see, I see.

Traditional awnings arebad.

[indistinct chatter, clamoring]

Oh, fuck.

Ah!

We got five sales off that baby talk shit.

You know, Mama was the master at it.

She used to do all the pitching for Daddie.

She was a beauty queen.

She knew how to sell anything to men.

Well, yep, like, like they say,

Mama was a goddamn special woman.

Yeah.

She told me once, when buying my first bra,

that "men do not respect your femininity

unless you are manipulating them with it."

Mom died before I got boobs.

And Dad took me to buy my first bra, so I guess

I missed that terrible tip.

Listen, lady. I'm the awning darling at this Con!

-So back off! -What? What?

I will not back off, I'll front on.

That doesn't make sense.

And you're going down.

You gonna let that cheap tramp take what's yours?

[laughs]: No!

-What is she taking? -Uh, all the sales!

You should outsell Awn Point this year.

That would blow Daddie's mind.

I do want to impress him, Brenna.

And I do want to sell my ideas.

They could hit big

if we got a big buy from a big chain, imagine it!

I mean, ha, my innovations speak for themselves.

Well, they haven't yet.

But they'll sell.

You just got to be open to playing this game.

Mama's style.

Look, here's Shauna's Facebook.

Okay, so maybe...

she did trick me.

Oh, right.

She's Gbenge and Katrina's kid.

Oh, man, those people rule.

Shit! How-- what can I do here to get justice

without looking like a racist?

Maybe stop worrying about how you look

and worry about what you do.

No, no, no, no, no, no. That's insane talk.

We are gonna go from Hall Zero

to Hall C, so...

seem a little more vulnerable.

[cheering, applause]

[laughing]: I'm tired.

So, um...

what is an awning anyway?

[laughs]

[cheering, clamoring]

[growling]

I'm no expert,

but... do I look

pretty under this big, strong awning?

[cheering, clamoring]

Oh, yeah? [whoops]

Oh, wow.

Oh, okay.

She's good.

Um... [giggles]

Oh, let me think.

I'll try anyway, right?

You guys are so smart!

Do you think the sun moves?

[cheering, clamoring]

Tell me what you think about awnings.

-Pwease? -[cheering, clamoring]

Hey, are we going too far with all this?

Oh, no, we got some real

big potential clients out there.

Holiday Inn. Hampton Inn...

Steven Tyler.

This is what you have to do

to get your ideas out there, Debbie.

Yeah. All right. [whooping]

Let's do it.

[cheering, clamoring]

Yeah, that's nice!

Hi, boys!

You ready to talk about awnings?

[giggles]

Lil' Deb has outsold Awn Point this year.

She's cuter than their girl.

And, and, and tell him I'm going to present awnings

in Hall C-- I did it, Daddie!

[gasps, sighs]

♪

FREDDIE: So what do you think I should do

-about the whole Shauna thing? -Babe,

this girl sees you are a sweet and caring man

who doesn't want to hurt anyone,

and she's manipulating that situation.

So confront her.

Ooh, you think I'm sweet, huh?

-[Debbie grunts] -[Freddie purrs]

I do, babe.

So tell me. Tell me straight.

Am I selling out who I am by acting young and sexy

-to sell my ideas? -Hey, it's not selling out, babe,

it's buying in-- you're getting your ideas out there.

-It works. -Do you like me better

[baby talk]: when I talk like this?

And act like this?

-Huh? -Ugh, God!

Don't, don't you ever bring that into our bedroom, babe.

That's gross and sick! [hisses, grunts]

Wha...? Freddie, wait, what?!

Sorry, look, babe, I-I'm all for you using that stuff to sell.

But I like women, not girls.

Just like Prince taught me.

[chuckles]

[indistinct chatter]

Okay, okay, okay, okay, okay, okay.

Hall C, yes! Let's do this!

Brenna, a Shirley Temple dress?

God!

It's Hall C.

You promised Daddie.

I don't know, man, this is...

gross.

It is.

But this is the last one.

And guess who's here.

McDonald's.

What? Mc-fucking-Donald's?

Yeah, but McDonald's

is all about youth markets.

Come on, you could earn so much more for Daddie's company.

And he'll be so proud of you,

as he was for our mama.

Don't throw it all away

after you came this far

selling your ideas,

doing all this stuff

you felt wrong about.

Just do this last one,

and you're done.

Hey, yeah, it's nice they named this place after me, but

why "memorial"? I-I didn't die.

Well, with your injury, you kind of did.

Hey there, Shauna.

Irish Heritage, huh?

They sponsor us. I'm the coach.

Wow. Imagine that.

So, listen, uh, Shauna, I don't want to say it,

but the businesses around town

have got it into their dumb heads

that, well, that your coupon page is...

a scam. So, here.

Look, you sold me that scam coupon page.

And you still have my money.

All right, so how about we bet

on the first half of this game.

I say your team beats mine.

'Cause we suck.

Pass it over here, man! Pa...

You're-you're not, you're not passing it, you got to...

Dude, you got to pass it.

My best is bad.

So to get my 20 back, you want me to bet on which team...

will lose? You think your team will lose,

-I bet Ollie's will? -Yep.

But double or nothing.

-And just for the first half. -Done.

-[whistle blows] -[grunting]

-[gasps] -[whistle blows]

J.K.R.P.T.O.

Just keep running plays through Ollie. I knew you'd be great.

I guess my adrenaline kicked in.

Great, great. Yeah, all right, go team.

Look, hey, baby, uh, pace yourself, okay?

Isn't that enough for you for the first half?

Fuck no!

[grunts]

-[whistle blows] -That's halftime.

Ollie, kids, uh, c-can you guys excuse

me and Shauna for a second?

-How'd you know she'd be good? -Come on, what?

You got no faith in your kids?

Oh, okay, well, let's bet again.

Huh? For the second half.

This time I bet we beat you.

You're on.

Okay, Ollie, leave it all on the field, okay?

Get all the minutes.

Just do what you did in the first half, okay?

-No. I'm out. -Why?! What? Why?

I'm boycotting playing because bees

are getting stepped on out there.

[whistle blows] All right, team, go have fun!

Make Ollie play, Roy.

No can do. Totally respect her

compassionate point about the bees.

You told her about the bees, didn't you?

You put that together, or did you need

one of these children to tell you?

Don't push it, you little shark.

When the hot, hot sunny sun

tippy-toes across the sky,

Mr. Regular Awning will cast shade over here

[gasps] Oh, no!

[giggles]

Mr. Awning should be able

to scoot over there, too,

to block that hot, hot sun!

-Right, boys? -[cheering, clamoring]

[whimpering]

-[grunts] -[cheering, clamoring]

Oh, she is so helpless.

I'm-I'm-- I've got to be in.

Okay, listen.

Guys, my designs put shade on your target area

for 96% of the day.

What happened? I literally can't hear her.

Is something wrong with the mic?

I can't hear a word she's saying,

but her body language is so off-putting, man.

I'm out.

Hey! Listen, you fuckers!

You were in on this idea a second ago!

I humiliated myself all weekend

to get these sales! [stammers]

Where do you think you're going, buddy?

-[indistinct chatter] -A waste of time.

Just a waste of my time.

[baby voice]: Don't you just wuv this awning?

I have a master's degwee.

[slurping bottle]

[cheering, clamoring]

Don't start.

A Manhattan, please, hon. [chuckles]

I just got to know, was all this

more of your Loki and Thor shit?

Did you know it would be more fun for you

to watch me crash and burn on the biggest stage?

[gasps] I'm not that conniving.

Am I? [chuckles]

Yes, you are.

Well, listen.

Your ideas are great.

But leave the pitching to Daddie.

You think my ideas are great?

[chuckles] Well...

-cheers! -Oh, no.

This one's for you, too.

I've already had my four ounces of wine today.

Later, sis.

Hey, man, look, I-I gave Shauna 20 bucks. I need it back.

[stammers] What are you talking about?

Look, she-she sold me some coupons for fast food and...

[stammers] I can't believe it's true,

because Shauna's so cool and everything, but...

turns out, they're a scam.

How do you know it's a scam?

Did you go to the right ones?

Uh, come again?

You got to go to the right franchises.

That's what she told me.

I've got three of those coupon pages

I have been waiting to cash in...

Oh, wait. Wait.

Uh, oh-oh, shit!

She got you and me both on this one.

Goddamn it!

H-Hold on one second.

[bottle caps pop]

You know, I've always wondered how this would feel.

A guy like me fitting in with a guy like you.

Shit. Just two dads,

drinking some Buds, talking.

Oh, man!

So, uh, you know this...

Irish Heritage Foundation?

Yeah. That's the favorite charity or whatever

of Kelley Frakes and all sorts of rich white people, right?

No, man. That is just Shauna.

She set it up knowing white folks would give money to it.

She uses it to fund her soccer team.

And she funnels money to her school through it.

Oh, she's good. She's real good.

I didn't even see the header

when I bought these coupons from her.

[chuckles] Wow, she's like a Robin Hood.

That's so cool, man.

Now, d-do you mind if I get, like, a selfie here,

or is that-that cool...?

[laughs]

I couldn't do the baby talk thing, either.

I did do it a long time ago, but I gave it up.

And now I'm the head

of the Jolly Night Inn hotel chain.

Yeah? No shit?

No shit, listen.

[whispers]: I am Shirley Temple.

But... Shirley Temple died.

That's what I wanted the world to believe.

I had to maintain that cutesy baby persona

throughout my career as a movie star,

then as a diplomat and as an ambassador.

That's why I decided to fake my own death

and become a powerful businesswoman in my old age.

You know,

you're a very smart gal.

Seriously. I heard about the self-adjusting awnings.

I'm intrigued.

Really? Okay.

Let me tell you about a little something called

Town Cloud.

Yeah, it's a huge, shared awning

that an entire town can share so that we block out

that bastard sun, but at the same time,

we exploit all its power with solar panels.

So, like, if you're, like, if you're the sun. No, you stand...

-Wait, where are you going? -You know what, forget it.

Good luck out there, Debbie.

And forget we ever met.

Shirley Temple's dead.

Goddamn it.

World ain't ready for me.

Captioned by Media Access Group at WGBH access.wgbh.org

Chirp.

Repair and Synchronization by Easy Subtitles Synchronizer 1.0.0.0