Original subtitles

-Nothing would make me more happy than to make you my wife.

[Alarm blaring]

Will you marry me?

-[Stutters]

[Alarm continues blaring]

♪♪

-Congratulations! -Move!

♪♪

Morning, there.

Look at us -- out and about, team bonding.

-I made breakfast muffins for everyone.

-Oh, thanks, Shares. -They're really moist.

I'm famous for my moist muff.

-Mmm, yummy.

-Alrighty. Um...

Who's ready for some first aid?

-Arguably, the more lives we save,

the less business we get, so...

-We work in a funeral home, so...

Okay, shall we? Yeah.

-Groovy. -[Chuckles]

[Indistinct talking]

I'm gonna wait, but thank you.

-Get down, get down, get down! -[Screams]

-There's a man out there with a gun, and he's got my baby!

[People screaming and crying]

-Oh, please, Jesus! Ah!

-Emergencies.

They can happen anywhere, anywhen.

-Wait, what the fuck?

-I'm Bronty, your danger specialist,

and that was your first lesson.

-[Sniffles] Um...

Is this is the first aid course?

-Yes.

-I've had an accident.

-I could tell. Costume's a bit much.

-Sorry, costume? -Yeah, your little...

A-ha.

[ "Sylvia-Pizzicato"playing]

♪♪

♪♪

♪♪

-We're ready.

♪♪

-Um...

This bitch is crazy. I'm leaving.

-You can't leave. I've already paid.

-Well, believe it or not,

I'd rather be back at the office.

-No, you of all people need to know first aid.

-What is that supposed to mean?

-Well, your ex-boyfriend's in a coma.

-Who? -Tyler.

-Oh, yeah, Tyler. I keep forgetting about him.

I should visit. -Yeah.

-But he won't know, so it doesn't matter.

Anyway, one of us needs to be back at the office,

and I nominate myself. Goodbye.

-No, no, no. The answering machine's on.

Trisha is there. We've got it covered.

[Telephone ringing]

[Ringing continues]

♪♪

-I don't want to be here. -Whisper, whisper, whisper,

whisper, whisper.

Sit down.

♪♪

Let's get started, shall we?

Who wants brain damage?

Not me.

Do you?

-No.

-How long have you got?

-Pardon? -How longhave you got?

-Sorry, I don't really understand the question.

-Ten minutes without oxygen

results in permanent brain damage.

That's why we learn CPR.

Start the clock.

It's meat week at the supermarket, and...

-Murray. -...Murray is having a barbecue.

Where's your trolley?

Where's your trolley, Murray?

Murray's experiencing chest pains.

Most people don't know they're having a heart attack

when it's happening.

-Oh.

What's happening?

-Tick, tock, tick, tock.

-Should we do something?

-I don't know. Should you?

-Murray's collapsed.

-Oh, oh. -Tick, tock.

-Get in there, Beau.

-When Beau approaches Murray, he slips on a stray sausage,

falling to the ground, hitting his head on the floor hard,

dying instantly.

-Oh, oh, damn.

-And now Murray's dead, too.

-Oh, nice try, Beau.

-No, not nice try.

No, because if Beau had checked for hazards,

they'd both still be alive.

-Yep. -Oh, what's that?

Now Murray's dog's dead, too,

locked in the car with the windows up.

-Sorry, boy. -Fuck.

-Don't swear. -Sorry. [Mumbles]

♪♪

♪♪

-I love you. -I love you.

-Pah, pah, pah. 100 beats per minute.

Okay, you're rushing it now. You're rushing it now.

Gently, there we go. Good.

-[Laughing] Don't.

That lady's such a bitch.

-[Chuckles]

-Oh.

Oh.

Oh, grim.

Two months today?

-What's that? -Since Hemi.

You doing okay? -Oh, thanks, Shares.

Yeah, I'm fine. Yeah.

Just got to keep moving forward. How are you?

-I'm gonna have to get changed at lunchtime.

I'm soaked.

-When was that? -At the beginning.

Just, it won't dry.

-Oh.

Do you want to have a go?

-Oh, yeah.

-Yeah. Close.

-Yeah. -Go -- Go for the green.

-Oh. -The green lights.

-Ahoy, Miss Lady, is it like this?

-[Sighs] No, you need to create a seal around the mouth.

-Oh, okay.

How about kind of like, um... like this?

-No, well, now you're constricting his airways.

-Am I? -Yes.

-No, Gwen, I think it's more like...like this, here.

-Oh, yeah, take your jacket off.

-Yeah, that makes sense.

-Howdoes that make sense?

-Makes sense to me.

Yeah.

-Oh, excuse me, Miss Bronty.

Am I -- Am I doing it fast enough?

-Wow. That was speedy!

What about if it passes out, like, standing up?

Then, right?

Like this?

♪♪

♪♪

Thought you did a runner.

-No, no.

There was no vegetarian options, so I got you some chips.

-Aw!

You also got you some chips.

-Yeah. Sandwiches were all soggy, so...

-Thank you. Where's Frankie today?

-No, nowhere. I gave her the keys earlier,

and I haven't seen her since.

[Laughs] No. No, jokes. Um...

Her mum sent me this.

-Wait, is that...

-Hey, Artie. Artie!

Frankie's picking up the cow dung.

Oh no, no, no, no!

-[Laughs] -Oh, my God.

How can she literally eat shit and still be cute?

-Yeah, I know. -[Chuckles]

You're a good dad.

-Thank you.

You're a -- you're a good boss.

-No, I'm not. [Laughs]

I'm actually not.

-No, you got...cool hair.

-Cool hair? -Yeah.

-Sweet. Thanks.

-Yummy. Club sammies.

[Mutters indistinctly]

So, Samson, um, what brings you here?

-Oh, well, um, Lena and I have made

the ultimate commitment to each other.

-And to God. -Mm-hmm, mm-hmm.

-Did you get a dog? -Oh, no.

Uh, we got married, 104 days ago, and it's strong.

We're so in love. -We're so in love.

-Jinx. -Jinx.

You owe me a juice. -No, no, no.

You can't drink any more juice

'cause it'll ruin your pearly whites.

So what? We want to spend the rest of our lives together,

so we're doing this course so we're prepared so that

if something ever happened to us...

No, I'm sorry. I just can't imagine my life without you.

[Hyperventilating]

-Aw, that's lovely.

-Oh, you have chives in your teeth.

-Oh. [Chuckles]

-Can I tell you something?

I bought my flight to Bali to DJ.

-Oh, amazing.

-Yeah. -Great.

-Mm. -Good for you.

-I think I just needed a nudge,

so thank you for backing me.

What? Do you think I shouldn't?

-No. -Do you think it's stupid?

-No, no. -You think it's silly?

-It's great. It's great. -You can say if you think

it's stupid. -But I was just gonna...

maybe ask you out.

Maybe.

[Pants swishing]

-That's good.

-Oh.

-Uh-oh-oh-oh. Oh, is that a...

Is that a hair?

-Oh, it's probably just one of mine.

-Ah. -Mm.

-Well, having you here makes me really miss Hemi.

-Oh.

I miss him, too.

-You two are so different.

-Oh, I think we were quite similar.

-Mm, no, I don't really see that.

-Well, we had a lot in common, so...

-Mm. Seems like you're on a very different path, though.

-I think I'm on the same path,

maybe just going a different speed.

-Not really. -I think so.

-Mm, he was the best.

He'd be thrilled I'm taking on more responsibility.

-Yeah. Wh--

Wait, sorry, what do you mean?

-Oh, did Gwen not tell you?

Oh, you and I -- we're gonna be partners.

I hope I didn't ruin the surprise.

-Partners? -Mm-hmm.

I'm buying her out.

[Indistinct talking in background]

-Come on, people.

30 minutes means 30 minutes.

Oi, Pollyanna, on your back.

Where are the other two?

Oi!

-Oh.

All right. -She's such a psycho.

-Oh, gosh, it fell.

-Eyes closed.

Okay, you -- you're on your way to the mall,

and, uh, Crockpots are 60% off,

and you love your slow-cooked meat, okay?

But what's that in the distance?

A twisted wreckage of a car and a motionless body beside it.

You're the first on the scene.

What do you do?

-Okay. Uh, "D" -- danger.

Um, I don't know. Everything looks okay.

-No, no. It's too risky. You just get out of there.

-If you don't do anything, she's gonna die.

What next? -"R" -- response.

Um, can you hear me? -Louder!

-Can you hear me?! -Ow, stop!

-No response! -Now what?

-Uh, call an ambulance. -Hello, ambulance?

Yes, you need to describe the situation in full detail.

-Um, there's been an accident.

There's a woman, um, late 30s.

-I'm 29. -Really?

Oh. She's wearing, um, mum jeans

and a weird skivvy and -- is that helpful?

-She's got quite oily skin, as well.

Not sure if that's important. Just...

-Yeah. -Uh, no muscle tone.

-And heaps of, uh, split ends. -Yep, yep.

-Actually, dry skin, as well -- combination, like a oily-dry --

like, both. -You're the sunken treasure.

-Knobby knees. -Ah, yeah, no,

her breath smells real stale.

-You've torpedoed my heart. -Your life seems awesome.

-Scrapes her hair back. -Oh, yeah.

-Quite severe. -Lonely.

-I can't imagine my life without you.

-Just have an experience.

-She looks like she doesn't contribute to society.

-I know you've got nothing better to do,

but I'm going to Bali. -She's a bit passive-aggressive.

-You can never teach again. -Nothing would make me

more happy than to make you my wife.

-You got fired, you dumb fuck. -Could be suicide.

-Okay. What next? -Airways. Um...

Her husband should really do mouth-to-mouth.

-Get off me, you bitch. -Ellie.

-Fuck you.

Fuck you all, you motley bunch of miserable cunts!

♪♪

-That too far? -Hmm?

♪♪

-[Screams]

[Gasps and cries]

Oh, my God.

♪♪

[Engine starts]

♪♪

♪♪

Oh.

[Cellphone ringing]

Oh.

[Ringing continues]

Ben. Ben.

My answer's no.

I don't love you.

But someone will because you're so great.

I just don't feel it.

I wish I did.

[Sighs]

I'm sorry that I didn't say this sooner.

I know, Ben, but I'm not gonna change my mind,

and -- and please move out.

Just whenever you're ready, but also [speaks Kiwi].

Um...

Thanks.

Bye.

Ah!

Oh.

[Exhales]

[Exhales strongly]

Ooh.

[Knocking on window]

-Wind your window down.

[Window whirring]

You've got asbestos.

♪♪

♪♪

-Are you okay?

-You were keeping secrets.

You went behind my back,

and I had to find out about it from Dean.

-I was going to tell you.

-Yeah, well, you didn't.

-H-Here. Hey.

-I should have expected it from you.

You never commit to anything.

-I amcommitting to what I want to do.

I'm going to Bali.

-To be a DJ?

-Yeah, to be a DJ.

Ellie, Dean wants to be here.

You want to be here.

I want to go.

It makes sense. Everyone's happy.

I'll miss you.

And I'll miss Beau.

But you'll both here when I get back.

-Yeah, I just...

I wanted us to be able to do it together.

-I know.

But you can do it on your own.

-Yeah, I know.

Koro taught me how.

[Sighs]

I think he'd be really proud of me.

-Yeah.

And I don't think he'd mind that I used the company card

to pay for my flights.

I think he'd be all good with that.

You're handling this really well.

I'd like to give you a hug.

I'm comin' in now.

Mm-hmm.

Mm-hmm.

This one goes there.

That stays up.

And that one, there.

Oh, yeah. That's the one.

Attagirl. Okay.

[Sighs]

I love you.

Oh! [Gasps]

-Supporting local content so you can see more

of New Zealand On Air.

♪♪

Repair and Synchronization by Easy Subtitles Synchronizer 1.0.0.0