Original subtitles

-The school board met this morning,

and the decision has been made

to terminate your contract effective immediately.

-I was under the impression the suspension was temporary.

Can I make an appeal?

-You could, but the PTA are all over this,

and I just think it's best for everyone

if you don't come back.

-Don't come back ever?

-Yeah.

Are you there? -Hurry up, Ellie. It reeks.

-I beg your pardon?

-Sorry. That was just my sister.

Uh, I guess it just feels like a big reaction

to one small mistake.

-I'm sorry you feel that way. -Uh, wrap it up.

-Okay.

Uh, well, thank you for letting me know,

and I guess I'll be in touch.

-Ugh. Okay.

Do you want me to pretend like I didn't hear that?

-It's fine.

I can't worry about that right now.

-Hey, what, what? No, no, no. Don't do that.

Stop doing that. You're -- you're not a surgeon.

-Gwen, you don't need to be surgeon.

You don't even need to have a license.

-Um, isn't this someone else's job?

-Koro taught me how to embalm when I was, like, 15.

We have to cut costs.

It's just like riding a bike.

-Is it supposed to smell like that?

-Stop being so precious.

-No, no, I'm being serious.

Like, is that what he smells like?

Or is it, um...

Is that what everything smells like?

Like, is that just the smell of death?

-Oh, fudge. -What's -- what's going on?

-He's blocked up.

I just need to relieve some pressure.

-[Gags]

-Um...

-Ugh.

-Ooh.

[ "Sylvia-Pizzicato"playing]

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[Utensils clanging]

-They should have talked to me before setting up this meeting.

I've got things to do.

-I added Alice as a friend on Facebook.

-Her name's Amba. -Is it?

-[Laughs] -Oh.

What are you giggling about?

-Nothing. It's one of those try-not-to-laugh compilations,

but, uh, I laughed.

-Morning there, team. -Oh, welcome.

Thanks for coming. Grab a seat.

-Oh, I'm gonna talk, so...

-Oh, you've got something to say?

-Yeah, that's why I called the meeting.

-Oh. All right. Well, uh, everyone, um,

Ellie's gonna say some words.

-I'm not sure if you guys have all met Gwen.

-Hi. For some reason, Koro also gave me half of this place,

so I guess I'm kind of like your boss.

-She's not your boss. -Ah.

-We're all equals. -Mm.

-This is weird, isn't it, being here without Granddad Hemi?

Um, I know that Granddad loved you all,

and while Gwen and I weren't expecting

to inherit Loving Tributes,

we're gonna do our best to make sure that --

-[Sighs] -What a man, mm.

-Pardon?

-Uh, Hemi. Um, such a loss.

-Must be so hard for you girls.

-Uh, well, I didn't really hang out with him,

but, um, yeah, he was closer with Ellie.

-Anyway, I -- -I've actually prepared

some saveloys in his memory, so is now a good time?

-Uh, maybe in a wee bit.

-Of course, of course, of course!

-Cheers! -Cheers.

-Cheers. -Here we go.

-Aw, thank you. -Wow. Breakfast of champions.

-Yummy. -So, as grateful as we are

for this very special opportunity --

-These are great. -Pot of boiling water.

-I love the ones that just, like, split,

and then it's like you get way more sausage.

-Now that I'm managing director,

I've had to make some tough decisions.

-Managing director? I thought you were a teacher.

-I am. I'm just taking a break.

-Why are you taking a break?

-Mm.

-Noah Dudley Cox, out of the tree, please,

you little cunt.

-Aah!

Ah! Oh.

-Hey, Freddie. You okay? You all right?

How's your arm? It's okay, isn't it?

-What did you say?

-I didn't say anything, sweetheart.

I think you've got -- you might have bumped your head.

And you're so brave. Don't tell anyone.

Yeah, I-I love children, um, but right now, this is my focus.

-Well, that's nice. -So, we --

-I'll fill you in.

I'm Dean Dulche.

-Isn't your last name Futch? -Yep.

I'm an entertainer, actor, singer, dancer.

I'm also a qualified funeral director/celebrant.

That means I do everything from the embalming to emceeing.

I'm also Hemi's choice, see, so when he passed,

I kind of naturally took on more responsibilities.

-Mm. -He trusted me with his life.

-And now he's dead. -Hmm?

-Hey?

-Shares, would you like to tell them about yourself?

-It's all right, Sharyn. You don't need to.

-Oh, call me Shares. -Okay.

-I'm executive catering manager.

Hemi called me the Kai Queen.

-Aw. -[Chuckles]

-He ate so many saveloys,

even after the doctor banned him.

I'm a Virgo, so great on a budget.

Um, I'm a big Ronan Keating fan.

Um, last year, my brother lost his leg

to meningitis.

-Okay. Thank you.

So there is something that we need to --

-Well, you haven't heard from, um...

-Oh, I'm Beau. -...Beau.

-Hemi hired me as the hearse driver

after he lost his license,

and then he just kept giving me jobs like, um, maintenance

and -- and landscaping. -Landscaping.

-He was like a brother to me... -Mm.

-...just really old.

-Yeah. -Yeah.

-Mm, yeah. -Yeah.

-Yeah. Oh, and I also have my...

I make my own T-shirts.

Um, this one's an original, so...

-Yeah, yes. Cool. Okay, so there --

-Sorry, so what are you gonna do?

-Me? Not much, 'cause we're selling.

I'm gonna be a DJ in Bali.

-Wait, sorry. Selling what?

-Selling Loving Tributes.

-A-Are we gonna lose our jobs?

-Maybe. -No, no, no, no, no.

Okay, so that's not how -- -Hello?

Hello?

-I...

-Ah, excuse me. We've been waiting.

-I'll be right with you. Yeah.

-There's a client. Please come with me.

I need your help.

-Hi.

-Um, right this way.

Why would you do that? Why would you say that?

-There's no nice way to do it.

-Couldn't it wait until we find a buyer?

We have to work with these people.

-Wait. No, I'm not working here.

I don't like working in general

and definitely not with dead people.

-Just in here. -Thanks.

-Thanks.

Thank you.

What did you think was happening?

-Um, well, I guess I thought that you would do the mucking

and then give me half the money.

I wish I didn't come in now. -Hi.

-Hi. -What does this mean for me?

-Yeah, we'll need to talk about that, but after this.

-Okay. Well, I've already started talking to Kerry

on the way, so... -No, no, no.

I -- I've got it. Thanks. -Okay, cool.

Well, I'll head out. -No, no, no.

I need you to go grab tea and...

-[Whispering] I don't work here.

You have sores on your face. -I didn't eat any.

-Ooh, yucky.

-That's not sores. -That's not.

[Door closes]

Do you know where the tea is?

-Yeah, it's in the kitchen in a container marked "tea."

-Hi. How are you?

Oh, I'm Ellie, the managing director.

-What happened to Dean?

-Dean was just holding down the fort,

but now I'm here, and we're here to help.

-Well, I hope there won't be any more chopping and changing.

To be honest, our uncle's funeral was at Trinity Meadows,

and it was just perfect,

but sadly, they were fully booked.

-We just want to make sure Dad gets the send-off he deserves.

-Absolutely...Kerry.

-Absolutely.

-Did the suit we gave you fit Dad?

-Yes.

[Equipment humming softly]

He looks very dapper.

-Sorry. -Oh, no. Of course.

-Ah.

-Thanks. -Oh. Oh.

There's no tissues? -Oh, sorry.

Gwen, could you grab us some more tissues, please?

-Sure, yeah, I've got a whole box right up my asshole.

-Oh! -Oh! Oh.

-Do you not want it?

Is she gonna do that again if I get her another one?

-Thanks, Gwen. That's all.

-What about the tissues?

-Yes, could you please grab us those tissues?

-Jesus Christ.

-Was there anything else?

-Uh, Dad loved golf.

We have the, uh, Tiger Woods quote in the eulogy,

but he just loved it so much.

We want Dad to be buried with his golf clubs.

I mean, none of us play, but...

-Well, I play.

-It's not about you, Kerry.

-Buried with his clubs. We'll...

We'll take care of it.

-I don't know where anything is, so...

there's that.

♪♪

-Do you...?

-Thank you.

♪♪

♪♪

-Maybe the one old killed him.

-Gwen. -You're right.

She could never hold a whip and with hands that shaky.

[Chuckles]

-I get it -- this is a joke to you,

but you actually have a job to do.

-I didn't apply for it.

I barely even knew Koro.

Clearly, this place was meant for you, but then he felt guilty

and realized he had nothing else cool to give me.

-I know that you want to go to Bali,

but how many people do you think are in the market

for a funeral home?

It's gonna take time, and I need you to help.

-You've got it under control.

You spent an unhealthy amount of time here as a kid.

Whose fedora?

-Yeah, well, as much as Koro loved this place,

he wasn't exactly business-savvy.

I found loose teeth in his desk drawer.

-Histeeth? -I don't know.

I'm just popping out for a wee bit.

-Wait, where are you going?

Wait for me.

Wait up.

Where are you going? -To a thing.

-What thing? -Just stay here.

-I don't want to be left here with these people!

Hello, Sharyn. -Hi!

-Hi. Wait for me! Wait.

Hi, Ben. -Hi, Gwennie.

Hi, beautiful. How was your first day?

-Hi. Mwah.

-Oh, I've already been sick today, so...

-Sorry, I'm just really fed out today.

-Oh, sorry. I-I just thought you might be hungry,

so I-I got you some low-pulp juice...

-Oh! -...um, some brown rice,

double evo, and I know it's not Friday,

but I got you a choccy 'cause you're menstruating.

-Aw, that's sweet. Thank you.

Did you remember to hang the washing up?

-No, sorry. I forgot. -It's gonna smell now.

-It's okay. I'll -- I'll tell the firm

I'll take an extra long lunch, and I'll pop home.

-It's fine. I'll do it. It'll need to go through again.

Okay, bye. -How's it all going?

-Okay, see you.

-Don't take it personally. She got fired this morning.

-Oh, sweetie! -It's fine, Ben.

It's fine. I'm gonna appeal it.

You just do the washing, okay?

-You don't want me to do the -- -Oh, fine.

I'll do it.

Gosh. -Where are we going?

-Just stay here. -I'm not staying here.

I'm coming. -[Sighs]

-Unlock my door.

Hey, unlock my door! I will make a scene.

[Shouting indistinctly]

Can I wear these? -Window.

[Window whirring]

-I forgot to tell you --

I went to the movies the other day,

and I sat down, and I got comfortable,

and then I realized I was sitting next to David Bain.

Yeah, and I was like, "Oh, my God.

If I get up, David Bain's gonna know that I think he did it,"

and, like, you just don't want to make someone like that angry,

you know?

He is such a loud eater.

-Ugh. That's horrible. -Mm.

-So, is Tyler gonna go to Bali with you?

-Who's Tyler? -Wasn't his name Tyler?

-Oh, Tyler.

No, he's in a coma.

Not, like, a bad one.

Ellie, where are we?

Who died? -No one.

Well, someone, obviously, but no one we know.

-So why are we here? -Research.

Kerry Mulley said they're the best in the biz,

so I just wanted to pop my head in,

but there's a funeral on, so I'll have to come back later.

-Trinity Meadows -- what does that even mean?

That's dumber than our name.

-Yeah, well, they're fully booked.

What -- What are you doing? -Let me out.

I don't want to go back to your work.

-No, no, no. We're leaving. [Back-up indicator beeping]

-Ellie, I think there's someone behind you, so don't...

-No. -Just hang on a second

'cause -- oh, Ellie!

What is wrong with you?

I'm pretty sure there's someone there.

Hang on. Hang on! Just stop!

[Car horn honks] Ellie!

Stop. Stop.

-We're not going in.

Somebody died. It's very disrespectful.

-Not if you're using it as a way

to make Peter's funeral better.

-His name's Phillip.

-Stop!

Your driving has drawn a lot of attention.

[Back-up indicator beeping]

But it's okay 'cause you're grieving.

-What?

-Play along. Come on. It'll be fun.

And it beats being back in the office.

Ah! -Oh, no, no, no!

No!

-Come on. -Gwen.

-Let's crash a funeral.

♪♪

-Please, stop! No, no.

Please, please, please. No, no.

Please. Stop, stop.

Just, what if we get caught?

-We don't know these people.

And I have to say goodbye!

[Sobs dramatically]

-Get up, get up.

-Oh, come on!

[Continues sobbing dramatically]

Oh, my God! -Stop it.

-Supporting local content so you can see more

of New Zealand On Air.

♪♪

Repair and Synchronization by Easy Subtitles Synchronizer 1.0.0.0