Original subtitles

[Slow Hip-Hop Beat]

[Jimmy] I really don't appreciate your arrogance in that class.

Ain't enough room for the two of us in there and you know it!

Yo Omar, just say the word man.

Say the word.

I heard you have a court order to attend Jane's class, Jimmy.

And if they find out you're drinking, it could land you back in jail.

Am I right?

You wouldn't.

I have Jane's number on speed dial.

So why don't you just take care of my tab, and walk away.

Fine.

278 bucks?

- We good for that. - Yeah, we good for that.

You got to be kidding me!

Just make sure you leave a tip, Jimmy.

Thanks.

You got any money?

You?

Worthless.

You uh, take Bitcoin?

* Strength in numbers

Nothing but net, baby!

Hell good lookin bruh. Stay up.

* I'm gon' ride for my bros

* You know if I got then you got it homie

* You ain't gotta ask no questions

* 'Cause what I look like working hard just to be selfish

* You ain't gotta ask

* If I'm my brother's keeper, keeper

* That's my shine

Robin.

We have time.

The judge couldn't remember if she left her stove on and had to run back home.

Oh God, I can already tell it's gone be a long day.

Tell me about it.

You clean up well, Mr. Johnson.

Well I was gonna wear my velour track suit, but I thought this would be a better choice.

So did you get it?

Yep, right here.

Called Jane last night, she turned it around this morning.

This is good.

I don't know if the judge will allow it because it's last minute but it's worth a shot.

I been waiting for this day to get here and it's finally here.

Keep in mind, her attorney will attempt to trigger you by attacking your character.

Keep your cool, and keep your game face on, alright?

Good morning, Naomi.

Morning Omar.

Come a long way since law school Robin.

You look good.

See you inside.

Okay, so what was that all about?

Tony was the president of the Student Law Association.

We helped each other get through a few long nights of law school together.

Oh, so he was your law school Zaddy?

Omar, stay focused.

Alright Robin, I just wanna make sure a lover's quarrel doesn't break out in the courtroom.

And I guarantee that you and Naomi will be the only ones battling it out today.

Oh, okay.

Let's go get them.

Hey, guys, guys, be very careful, that picture's very special to me, okay?

You know what, let me help you line it up.

Raise it just a little bit.

Right there, that's perfect, okay.

Oh, ow!

Oh, whew!

That's, that's my jam!

Yo.

Hey!

Just stopping by to check on the progress.

- [Keith] Oh yeah? - And take you to the courthouse.

- Oh is it time to go already? - [Jarvis] Yeah.

Oh okay.

Shouldn't you let the professionals help with those?

Ah, nah man, it's not that hard.

I got to reframe Bianca's picture myself because it needs to be perfect.

I'm sure she'll appreciate the hard work and dedication.

I haven't spoken to her since she left for Miami, um...

She might not make the opening.

You know what man, I would just focus on your big night.

Yeah, you're right.

By the way, congratulations on your new gig.

Ah!

Man y'all moving on up like George and Weezy!

Yeah, we don't do it like that.

You got to get the snaps and claps.

Nah, I'm good. - [Keith] Come on, now.

Hit it with the one time.

Aight, you gone make me get into it, you gone make me get it.

[Both Mumbling Song]

Wait, you know what, messing with you.

Come on man, we gone be late.

Okay, alright yeah, you're right, you're right. - [Jarvis] Messing with you.

Hey um, el hammero no es mi amigo.

Vamonos!

Wait up!

[Jarvis] Come on.

[Serena] Remind me why we come here again?

'Cause it's cheap and it's my turn to treat, so...

You ain't slick, Q.

You okay, 'Rena?

I'm just irritated.

Greg got my wig twisted.

Oh Serena, I heard about the engagement ring.

That sucks!

Couldn't even imagine being engaged for less than 24 hours.

I told you not to tell nobody.

By nobody I didn't know you meant the somebody it happened to.

My bad.

Cindy, you're on ten, I need you to bring it down to five, okay?

This is about 'Rena.

He keeps blowing up my phone!

Ew, a stalker.

[LaQuisha] You need to block that fool.

My grandmother used to say peanut butter with no jelly is just a nut.

Mm, mm, hello, I should've ordered that.

I promised myself I wasn't going to cry.

- So sad. - Uh-uh.

We're reclaiming our right to celebrate ourselves without needing men to validate us.

Now, you all cried out now, gimme your phone.

What're you doing?

The best way to get over somebody is to get under somebody new.

Setting up your dating profile on Thirsty.

It's plenty of fish in the sea 'Rena.

Uh-uh, I don't trust no dating app to find true love.

That's for people looking for entanglements.

That is not true.

I found my French boo online.

Just wait til that green card come in the mail honey.

What does that mean?

No.

I need to learn to love myself before trying to love another man.

Fine.

I got you tickets to see Anderson .Paak this weekend.

You know I love me some Paak.

You know I got you.

Oh, can I go?

Sorry sis, I think the tickets are sold out.

Oh shoot, we have to go back to work.

We've been gone an hour and fifteen minutes.

Y'all coming?

Technically our lunch hour starts when we sit down to eat,

not when we clocked out.

I'm not getting fired.

I need this job, y'all have fun!

See you later!

Don't bring her to lunch no more, okay?

- I'm done, I can't. - You got to love her.

On behalf of Mrs. Johnson, we submitted notarized affidavits

and video footage from several witnesses, Your Honor.

Good afternoon, Judge Baker.

In response to the video, we'd like to submit a reference letter

from an anger management program.

You know shots don't count after the buzzer, right?

- But your honor-- - It's too late Mrs. Turner.

The court will render a ruling based on testimonies given today.

Call your witness, Moretti.

The council calls Naomi Johnson.

Mrs. Johnson.

Let's cut straight to the chase.

What is your financial status?

I'm a celebrity stylist.

I earn well over six figures a year.

Okay.

Well go on then with your bad self.

Any celebrities I might know?

Um, Ciara, Lil John, Usher.

Some of my favorites.

And that sounds fun!

(whispering) What?

Mr. Johnson,

Occupation and income.

Mr. Johnson was a Senior VP at a tech company before becoming a stay-at-home father

while developing his software app.

So no income, got it.

No, no, no Your Honor, money is not an issue.

I was given a nice severance.

You got severance more times to interrupt my courtroom, sir.

I apologize, Your Honor.

Mrs. Johnson, why are you seeking sole custody?

Your Honor, when we started out it was like a dream.

I mean on paper we were both successful and upwardly mobile.

But then everything changed.

He became demanding and it was clear that he wanted a house wife.

And that is not who I am.

We started fighting, all the time.

I know he didn't put his hands on you.

No Your Honor, but um...

he does spank our son and his behavior scares me sometimes.

Thank you for your testimony, Mrs. Johnson, you may be seated.

Do you need a recess?

If we could Your Honor.

We'll resume in fifteen minutes.

[Omar] Well I guess we know who won the Oscar today.

She was damn convincing.

But she's lying.

And the judge won't even let me speak.

You know, she probably one of Naomi's sorority sisters, or something.

I admit Judge Baker may be a little unconventional but there's a method to her madness.

Don't fumble the ball in the end zone.

You'll get your chance.

[Omar] Naomi and I got married after only six months of dating.

Now I can admit that it was a little rushed, but...

we were really in love.

When she got pregnant with our son Caleb,

I felt like the luckiest man on the planet.

But then she was diagnosed with postpartum,

and it made things a little rough in our marriage.

So rough that you left for two months.

Your Honor, I didn't understand postpartum at the time.

And we both needed space.

But we moved past that, Naomi.

Keep the dialogue towards me, please.

So the filing here says you lost your job when you were arrested, Mr. Johnson?

It was self-defense Your Honor.

- He was protecting his wife-- - Your, I got it Robin.

My first instinct is to protect, Your Honor.

Now a man was cursing at my wife and the first thing I thought was to knock him out.

And to be perfectly honest, if I had to do it all over again I would do it the same way.

I love my wife, and I love our son.

Now Naomi thinks that the most important thing is money.

Which is fine.

But to me it's...

love, and just being together as a family.

Mr. Johnson where are you currently residing?

Well I'm actually in transition, since I was kicked out of the house.

Thank you for your testimony, you may be seated.

Thank you.

Mrs. Turner,

I think I will take that anger management reference letter for Mr. Johnson.

Thank you.

- It's pretty late. - I know.

- Been a long time. - Hey.

[Jarvis] Damn.

[Greg] I'm sorry, man.

[Jarvis] Yeah, me too.

Just can't catch a break, huh?

Yeah.

the judge uh...

granted me joint custody!

- What? - No!

[All Cheering]

- Come on, man. - Come on, man!

Stop playing, you had me though. - Yes, look, look, look though,

there's one condition.

I have to get my own place, so Jarvis, I'm gonna need your help.

Whatever you need bro, I got you, it's done.

Hey, um...

[Omar] Naomi!

No matter what happened up there today, I'm not trynna take anything from you.

Okay.

[Jarvis] It's for your son, she'll get it.

Yeah um, think it's too early to ask for spousal support?

Who's man is this?

Keith, shut up.

- It's too, it's too soon. - [Omar] Keith.

- Just say it's too soon! - [Jarvis] Wait, wait, what?

[Omar] Just shut up.

Now Danni, slow down.

Okay, tell me exactly what happened.

I'm on my way.

Aye, you good bro?

I don't know.

Something about some news reporters outside my office?

- Whoa. - What?

I got to go.

Yo, I'm happy for you.

* Ain't much above my momma, my music and then my money

[Greg] Alright, I think this is it.

Right up here on the right.

There you go.

Push, yeah push the seat.

Just push it up, aight.

And ... okay, thank you!

A little slide, okay.

Watch your step, have a good day!

Excuse me ma'am, excuse me, like some water?

No, it's cold out here.

* My mind's on my money

- Next time. - [Greg] Are you serious?

[Scoffs]

On God.

Yo sticky fingers, don't I know y'all?

Nah fam, ain't no squares in our circle.

Oh.

Looking like somebody uncle trynna play cool.

Oh, you got jokes?

Looking like the Migos on a budget.

Yo, my man, I do know you.

You got an older brother named Booney, right?

Your name is uh, Reginald.

Wait, your real name is Reginald?

Yeah, so?

Yeah, I went to school with Booney.

When, in '79?

Yeah, with your mama.

She still rock them blonde finger waves?

Aye, it's good man.

Tell her I said what's up.

Yo, I ain't seen Booney in a minute man.

He used to cheat off my tests in high school, how's he doing?

He got locked up.

Really?

Damn, sorry to hear that.

You do know you ain't gotta follow in his footsteps, right?

The world is bigger than your hood.

I promise you that.

Y'all boys stay up, man.

Be safe.

Yo!

Couldn't sell it anyway man, it's a old model.

No cracks or nothing, huh?

My man.

I ain't even gone ask about the wallet.

You wasn't gone get it back anyway.

Aye, you want to buy some water?

Hell no!

* Problems on my plate and I don't speak

* Got some goals of mine with time, I reach, yeah

[Woman] "On the Scene with Gene" Productions?

Yeah, it's Omar Johnson for Eugene.

[Woman] Hey Omar, come on in.

[Eugene] You are on the scene with 'Gene.

And everybody knows I keeps it 100 when it comes to news, and music and social events.

[Eugene] And I feel compelled to say something!

It is on me, it is encumbered on me to say this,

y'all rappers got to step your game up.

- Oh, don't start that 'Gene. - I'm serious, I'm serious.

These mumble rappers, I cannot understand one thing they say.

Because it's not your generation!

Let them have their moment, stop player hating.

Uh-huh, uh-huh, yeah that's why, you showing how old you are.

You showing your age.

They don't even say player hating no more.

- They don't? - They say clout chasing, or capping.

Alright ladies and gentlemen, I have a classic, by a true legend, Isaac Hayes.

And let me just tell you this, young boys take notice.

I'm trynna put you up on game, pay attention.

Take out your notepads.

These ladies do not want to hear trap music on the first date, okay?

Take that advice,

and thank me later.

- Ah, what up nephew? - Unc, what up? [Laughing]

You didn't bring no food or nothing.

I just stopped by to say hello.

- How you doing? - Oh, man.

- You alright? - Come on now, I think you popped my shoulder out of place.

- Well, let me, let me pop it back in place. - No, no,

get your big gargantuan hands off me!

Y'all big dudes play a lot.

Oh I like the smile, you look happy? [Omar Sighs]

I got him.

Unc, I got joint custody of Caleb.

That's huge man.

[Eugene] Aye look, congratulations nephew,

but, what does Naomi think?

She'll come around.

Look, my son needs me so I just gotta do my thing.

Now you hold that thought.

Somebody got to hear this, people got to hear this.

I definitely need to hear it.

- Whoa, whoa, whoa, wait, wait, hold up. - When we come back,

we're gonna be on live with relationship guru, Omar Johnson.

Whoa, whoa, whoa unc, I didn't come up here to be on the radio.

[Automated Voice] "On the Scene with Gene".

[Automated Voice] "On the Scene with Gene".

Well as promised, we are here with Omar Johnson.

And you know what, he's kind of shy, but a good dude.

Like, he'll give you the shirt off his back.

So, having said that, how does a man like that end up with a criminal record?

- Damn unc, you just gone put my business out there. - I'm just asking!

I got to know.

Well first of all, I don't have a record.

Oh.

I had a misdemeanor charge for protecting my wife.

A guy got a little aggressive with her in the parking lot, and um...

I hit him, and broke his jaw.

That sound like a record, I'm just saying.

I ain't no judge but that sound like a record.

And you a black man, you know you guilty until proven guilty.

Yeah, trust me, I know.

And you know how the media likes to portray us: as criminals and deadbeat dads.

Wait, wait, wait, wait, hold up there some deadbeats out there now.

- And they deserve all the smoke they get. - Yes they do.

All the smoke, but it's a small percentage.

Statistics actually say that black fathers are the most engaged fathers in the country.

Well where they at?

'Cause, I mean, I need a new ex-husband.

You got some friends?

Yeah, I have some friends, but they're still trynna figure it out.

We all trynna figure it out!

I'm 30 years in the game, and I'm still trynna figure it out myself.

But I can say this, that without my wife

I wouldn't be the man I am right now. - That's right.

So uh, behind every good man there's a great woman.

Why we gotta be behind you though?

Because they say that, talk to them, not me, they, that's they!

But there is a divide between black men and black women.

How do we address that, Dr. Johnson?

Well I'm not a doctor, but...

I just think black men and black women should stop blaming each other for everything.

But we got to be honest here,

I mean, black men do not effectively communicate.

No, no, no that's a false argument.

We communicate.

So you saying I'm lying?

- What are we doing now? - Oh, y'all arguing.

Alright now, I ain't no guru or nothing, but I know arguing when I see it!

No, no, no we're communicating.

Men talk.

We express ourselves.

But men talk to other men.

I mean listen I talk to my brothers, Greg, Jarvis and Keith everyday about my feelings.

Hold on Johnson, ain't no free shoutouts.

I'm just playing, I'm just playing.

Shoutout to the good brothers, they good dudes.

But seriously, men are scared to talk to women because of how they might react.

Now we're sometimes criticized and even laughed at for being emotional,

but then we're being chastised, when we don't open up.

But it starts at home.

I mean, we teach young girls to be emotional.

We don't teach young boys to be emotional.

In fact, we don't even let young boys know that it's okay to cry.

We've got a lot of work to do to get rid of this toxic masculinity.

- What is toxic masculinity? - Exactly.

When did masculinity get to be so toxic?

It's not!

Well you just said it was, you just said it was.

- Can you prove it? - We got to wrap up y'all, time to go to break.

- Now we wrap up? - We gotta wrap up!

Please, that's toxic to me! [Reporter] Mr. Johnson...

Can you elaborate on the racial discrimination allegations at MACC enterprises?

This is the first I've heard about all this.

Are you upset that you were used as a pawn to buffer the scrutiny from the black community?

No comment, no comment please.

Excuse me.

[Danni] Mm, mm, mm.

So...

how does it feel to be canceled?

Who canceled me?

Black Twitter.

[Danni] You're trending at #142 so, technically you're not really canceled,

but you will be dragged for a few days.

I need to prepare a statement.

You need to let me go out there and talk to them Mr. J.

Okay, 'cause I'll tell them to leave us the hell alone!

'Cause we are not our ancestors.

Am I right my brother?

Danni, think about what you're saying, that's...

that's kinda a little disrespectful.

Well I read it on a T-shirt, and it sound real good to me.

I appreciate your enthusiasm, but life is like a game of chess, Danni.

How you move matters.

I just need some time to figure it out.

You got it.

I hear you Danni.

I hear you.

- We'll circle back. - Mhm.

[Reporter] Mr. Johnson!

- Mr. Johnson, we want to hear your side of the story. [Reporters All Speaking At Once]

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