Original subtitles

You've reached 6870953,

don't bother leaving a message,

I don't listen to them anyway.

Hi Lisa,

if you happen to get this message

this is Piero Mansani,

a friend of your cousin Tommaso.

I just want to say

everything's fine here in Livorna,

I mean, shitty as usual,

how about Rome?

That is, if you're there, who knows

I'll leave you my number again

so if you by chance...

What the fuck do you want?

I'm ready.

I told you not to bug me when I'm on the phone.

Buy flowers cemetery mommy.

I'm not going to the cemetery.

Go, Mara'll go with you.

From my diary of those days.

Saturday, April 21.

Exhausted.

I fight the idea of dying

in the useless delusion of

seeing you again, my love.

You may ask yourselves

how is it possible that a boy not quite 20,

with a healthy constitution,

and a respectable academic record

can fall so low?

It's a long story,

let's start from the beginning.

I came into this world at midnight

sharp on March 12, 1974,

in a place on Via della Coroncina,

neighborhood of Ovosodo.

The super 8 film my father shot didn't come out very well.

He and mom were very emotional,

because their other son had turned out a bit odd

Piero? Wanna play?

I have to finish my homework.

The doctors used to shake their heads when examining him.

They said he wouldn't live very long.

But big Ivano didn't feel like dying yet.

Leave me alone! Mom help!

Piero,

you still have that headache?

Come here darling.

Mom was always a bit sick,

but she loved us just the same.

Did you and Ivano fight with each other again?

He hurt me.

He loves you, you know.

He could have 'braked' my arm.

You should say 'broken', not "braked".

I want a kiss too.

Come on then.

One day mom died.

We couldn't face it.

How could we live without her?

Dad loved her a lot.

They met while dancing in the summer of '65.

He told her he was the son of a tycoon from Argentina,

who left him a huge inheritance and a candy factory,

an estate in Canada with two lakes,

one warm, the other cold,

but it wasn't true.

He had been a docker but had been fried

for political reasons, he said.

From that moment on no one had a clue whatsoever.

One day he came home with a big car.

No one knew where it came from.

He was always at the bar bumming rum punch.

But mom loved him.

Together it was like the song,

the most beautiful couple in the world,

or so I thought.

That afternoon, dad took us aside

to talk to us man to man.

Now you're both big boy.

We can talk straight, clear the air, right?

I've been told about a nice girl.

A hard worker.

Since you guys are big now,

we need someone at home who can cook and clean,

so I thought I'd have her come live with us,

even can use a hand,

if we can't help each other out.

Listen, mom was mom, no doubt about it.

What's her name?

Mara. She's really a good girl.

A worker.

Serious. During the darkest moments of mom's illness,

she was always there for me.

She was very kind and understanding,

and she's nice. She sings.

Know which song?

The one you like, the one that goes like this.

I can't sing, but you know the one.

So. It's a deal then.

I'm glad you're with me on this.

Easy now.

Fucking lousy place.

Don't exaggerate! It's nice.

What's wrong now?

They're looking at me.

Mind your business. Don't worry about it.

Here we are.

This is Piero and this is Ivano.

Say hello, guys.

He said good morning.

Does he always talk like that?

I'll show how we're settled.

Badly. There's even a pigeon,

a blackbird, I'll get rid of it.

I wanna lie down, my back is killing me.

Is there anything cool to drink?

Orange soda, barley water, even a nice little beer.

She's thirsty. Something cool.

There's tap water.

Go get us something at the bar.

So where's the money?

You always ask for money.

When's the last time you changed the sheets? They stink.

Easy, baby.

Quiet.

Wait.

Come and see.

I can do that too?

No, not you.

You?

No, just dad.

Thank god.

Damn.

I can't take it anymore.

Damn that fucking bastard who ruined you.

Did you get the towel?

Maybe we should take her to the hospital.

I'll call the ambulance.

No hospital.

She doesn't want to go.

Her mother died there.

Your dad, where is that goddamned son of a bitch?

Don't you think she's a bit ugly?

She's all right.

If she turns out ugly, I'll drown her.

Understand, Diana?

Don't you dare turn out ugly,

ugly women are all unhappy.

You called her Diana?

Like the greek goddess and the wife of Prince Charles.

Now she's got it good.

He may be ugly.

But think of the money, the castles, the jewels.

I would go for that.

It must be your dad.

Mr. Nedo Mansani, please.

He's not here.

We've got a search warrant.

Search the bedroom.

There were words on the warrant.

I had only heard in the movies.

Arrest warrant.

Criminal association.

Default, fugitive.

Understand? This is my house.

Who know what dad had done.

Where he had gone.

At the time, I didn't ask certain questions.

For some time, I was taken with something else.

Take a guess.

Girls.

The other half of paradise.

I wondered: Now that I'm the son of a fugitive,

will it be better or worse?

What would girls think?

Would they avoid me? Admire me?

I was under a spell.

They were like aliens to me.

I was kind of afraid.

What were they thinking about?

Did they feel what I was feeling?

I didn't know what I wanted from them.

But I wanted it bad.

The first symptom showed up one summer afternoon.

I wasn't quite nine years old.

Striker Paolo Rossi got ready to take the penalty kick.

German goalie Schumacher was ready to make the save.

Whoever kicks it out, gets it.

Whoever smells it, deals with it.

Up your nose with a rubber hose.

If it doesn't fit, sit on it.

I'm rubber, you're glue.

Whatever you say.

It was exactly three in the afternoon

of July 11, 1982.

A fateful day.

In a few hours

Italy would win its third World Cup.

That night

while everyone was proud to be Italian,

in addition to being from Livorno,

I was very confused.

From then on

the world seemed to me a place

where divergent creatures were drawn together to mate.

I'm left alone with an idiot

and a good for nothing.

Some day I'm going to leave the gas on

and we'll all be blown up.

What have I done wrong? Tell me, Ivano.

I just want to be happy and have a lot of money,

a nice guy who love me,

who take me out to dinner,

who gives me lots of gifts,

I would love coral earrings.

Shut up.

Actually, the only thing I liked to do

was to go buy milk at the corner store.

I envied my friend Mirko for his moped,

for the store where he loaded up on snacks as much as he wanted,

but most of all for his mother Ivana.

Put it on your tab?

See you, good looking.

I envied him because of Katia.

At age 13, they french kissed.

I was envious of whomever knew the secret of love.

While for me,

that mysterious question

became more and more of a problem.

Poor, sweet Susy Susini,

who lived in my building.

Realized that at her expense.

Katia

Can we go?

One second, Susy.

When I saw her, her reaction at the time

was indecipherable.

Did you say something?

No. I mean I said hello.

I thought so, sorry.

Are you okay?

I was convinced she couldn't stand me.

But Katia told me she liked me a lot.

In fact, one day she called me.

Susy wants you to know she's into you.

Toto, Sergino and Juri

also like her a lot and they even told her so.

But if you want you two can go out

right away. What should I tell her?

Can you repeat the question?

Sorry, but it's noisy in here.

Do I have to give you an answer now?

Okay.

I said yes.

Thanks, don't worry about it.

Tell her I said hello.

What did he say?

He was happy, his voice was shaking.

This way, the four of us can go out.

Me and Mirkio and you and Piero.

I've got a girlfriend.

I read from my diary at the time.

Wednesday, May 14, 1987.

I can't describe how I feel since I've found a girlfriend.

Is this love?

It seems more like pride.

Is lover pride?

Think about it.

How's it going?

Okay. You?

Not bad.

Good.

You going home?

Yeah, and you?

I'm going out for a little while.

See you later.

Maybe I took too long to think about it.

In fact, a few days later Katia called me.

Susy doesn't want to go out with you anymore.

Fine, bye.

I have to admit I felt a strange sadness.

What did he say?

Fine, bye.

Forget about him, Ovosodo's a nerd.

Should we call Sergino?

No.

Come on.

I said no.

My girlfriend left me.

What's wrong with me?

Why couldn't I do what others do?

I couldn't see myself making 'cucci-cucci',

whispering sweet nothing without feeling like an idiot.

I thought what if I'm like Fabio?

Or even like Danielino?

But no, that wasn't me.

Even if some displays of machismo

simply shock me

when I have them bent over in front of me.

I don't know what gets into me.

Those beautiful naked backs...

I feel like punching them.

I didn't dare let on that it shocked me.

I lived in a world that did not allow nuances.

One more subjunctive.

One existential doubt, too many,

and you were branded a 'queer' for life.

Dad

No, we were all sleeping.

I'm okay. I'm studying.

I have exams in June.

Not my driver's license, my diploma.

When are you coming home?

Nedo? My love, honey.

You were a bastard leaving like this.

I miss you to death.

It's a mess here. They want to evict us.

The police have come...

Where have you been?

Don't worry, it's nothing.

I'll talk to the judge.

He's a good man.

Committed to civil rights, they say.

I'll tell him what the deal is.

Love, I've missed you so much.

What do they want from you?

Nothing.

I've been framed by some bad guys,

but there are plenty of witnesses,

Who will see to it that I'm set free...

People like Nedo, you know...

Come on, Mansani.

Just one minute.

At the trial we found out...

that Mercedes was stuffed with cocaine.

He was sentenced 5 years and 8 months.

To this day, I don't know if dad knew,

or if he was really just framed.

In school,

I wrote an essay about the misadventures

of an innocent man

who was caught up in things much bigger than he could control

I also wrote that the cosmos is not built on a human scale,

and that man must adapt to it with little gain,

except those with power and fame,

which even rhymes.

Piero...

Your essay is great.

I want to read it to your classmates

to show them what it means for a writer to combine

the creativity of a novel with realism of description

that is to combine the fun of story-telling

with life's dramatic reality

just like Dickens, Mark Twain and Salinger

I gave you an A but in fact I wanted very much to give you an A+...

What is it, Batoni?

Sorry ma'am but this isn't creativity

everyone can do that.

What do you mean?

Ovosodo really has a father in jail.

Batoni, you get out!

Why me?

Because you don't even have the courage

to express your opinions.

No, actually, stay here...

This way you can help me analyze

the incomparable masterpiece

of our shameless friend there.

Title: create a story that could actually happen.

I, one day,

an incredible thing happened to me.

I told everybody about it

but, swear to god, nobody believed me

that it actually really happened.

Everybody would have thought that

I made it up all by myself to look cool.

I ask if it is a daring and reckless inventor of language

or just a smiling rascal

who would do better to study every now and then

instead of spending his afternoon shooting lizards

and teasing poor Fiorella.

But ma'am...

Honey, you're wasting your time,

everyone knows Florella likes Enrico Tampucci.

Okay, all together.

"The infinite" by our friend Giacomino Leopardi.

Giovanna was more than a teacher,

to me more than a mother,

she was amazing but someone said she was half crazy

because her husband died just after they got married.

She was asked to moved.

What a surprise.

I brought these back to you.

You've already read them?

Good, that means

Pasolini was a little rough but interesting,

but the other one.

Moravia? Yeah, I know...

It made me depressed, but maybe it's just me.

Buricchio, move it.

Are you hungry? Should we eat something?

Have you seen the grades yet?

No, they haven't put them up yet.

I went through a lot to get you a good grade.

But Mrs. Fazio says you're a disaster with equations.

You finished with honors.

Honors?

Awesome.

That word made me want to dress up in jacket and tie,

smoke with a cigarette holder and go to cocktail parties.

Honors, like Prince Charles,

only without the big ears.

The commission supports the continuation of your studies

in particular classics.

Yeah right, classics.

That's what it says.

Classics my ass. Listen to this guy.

Classics, who do you think you are? A writer?

What would you do for work?

The classifieds are full of ads.

Help wanted, graduates in latin and greek studies, with license.

Ms. Fornari told me she would pay for my books.

How generous

Know what you should tell her?

If she has money to burn,

why doesn't she send us a money order?

Your damned father still has to pay his lawyer.

Instead of dreaming go see my cousin Riccardo.

Move it.

Ever since Mara arrived her cousin Riccardo

and his garage had loomed over my future.

But I had gotten too big for my britches thank to Giovanna,

and I couldn't see myself as a mechanic.

Finally, I enrolled at Caproni High School on Via del Mare.

An exotic and elegant place for someone from my neighborhood.

Like Beverly Hills.

On the first day I got off at the wrong stop.

It's about time.

We couldn't wait any longer...

Come this way.

I'm not used to the bus.

I got off at the wrong stop.

They sent you alone, on the bus?

Bastards!

Here we are.

The third one is clogged and there's also a leaky faucet...

If you can take a look at it.

Have you been working with Mr. Marmugi long?

Mr. Matmugi?

You're not the plumber?

Apparently,

I didn't carry myself like the students from this school,

but so as not to be rude I was about

to roll up my sleeves and take a look at that faucet.

Sorry

Section A was the most prestigious.

I never know if I was there by mistake,

or because Giovanna had been hard at work.

Unbeknownst to me.

Biagini.

Luca's brother?

My brother remembers you fondly.

What a lovely boy.

Chimenti.

Doctor Chimenti's daughter.

Give him my best regards.

Gargani.

The son of the renowned captain I suppose.

Actually he's now an admiral.

Congratulations.

I'll be sure to tell him.

Mansani.

Of course. Your father is that nice gentleman...

the rotary club vice president.

No

I meant not anymore.

No?

From then on...

a shroud of mystery descended over my father's life.

so dense it even fooled me.

Initiation.

Come on. Run the gauntlet.

How about you? Come on curly.

I told you to leave me alone.

Nice going, asshole.

Moron! Moron!

I was no expert when it came to punches,

but at school, what I could do was more than enough.

In my neighborhood

you had to know how to fight if you wanted respect,

there were certain guys who were absolutely nuts.

Furio Brondi bit the heads off lizards,

sniffed gasoline, then tortured us kids.

What are your mother?

Whores.

What do I do to your mother?

Fuck her up the ass.

And you?

What he said.

Good. Good boy

You have a few coins by chance?

We'll go home to get them.

We'll be right back.

Now he's in rehab weaving baskets.

Silvano Ciriello, we called Wyoming,

for his special talent.

He could also say Hawaii, Iowa and Palaia,

which was his mother's hometown.

At school I minded my own business,

but I earned a name for writing essays

and I learned how to exploit.

50 (non-negotiable)

I'm done. Can I go now?

Yes, go head.

Knock yourself out.

There's only a half-hour left.

Subject?

Literature. Count Ugolino.

Current events?

Drugs

Ugolino 50,000, drugs 30,000.

I have one ready on the European Union for 20,000.

it's worth b, b+.

Do drugs.

Send someone in 15 minutes.

I can only do three paragraphs,

otherwise you won't able to copy them all.

Make it good or I'm gonna fail.

I was respected, sometimes even feared.

Some people may have even liked me.

But I was really lonely...

and I stayed that way for four long years...

in that seat, in the second-to-last row.

The first day of my last year...

Gargani, see what that strange man wants.

Finally. How do you get into this school?

Normally, through the front door.

It's closed, and it's only 8:30.

What, is this the Naval Academy?

Actually, it's 8:40.

Wanna know what happened?

I just got here when I realized that I had my slippers on...

I had to go back home to put these on.

Who are you?

Tommaso Paladini. This is 5a, right?

Can I come in?

Make yourself at home.

Where should I sit? Here?

Perfect! Comfortable seat, great view.

I'm ready, go ahead.

I don't know where you picked up these strange manners.

You're right, I come from classics.

It's become a real hole.

Clean up you act.

That's why I'm here.

I feel changed already.

Where are you going?

Home.

I take the 12 and then change to the 30.

Where the hell do you live?

After Via Garibaldi.

I'll give you a ride.

It's pretty far. Where do you live?

Don't worry about it.

Is it gonna make it?

Push.

Aren't they waiting for you at home?

No one ever waits for me.

Sorry.

Goddamn it.

Dry as a bone.

We can't even siphon some off.

Got 2,000 lire?

No.

I'll call a friend of mine he'll give you some gas.

It's great here.

It looks like Naples, Berlin, Bucharest.

Mirko.

They're not back from the store yet.

Thanks, Renata.

C'mon Piero.

I'm coming.

Who's that?

My brother Ivano.

Delicious, really, out of the world.

Even the pasta was exquisite.

I'd like to come and live here.

With Piero, Diana and Ivano.

Can I call your mom?

That's all I need.

Big Ivano, leave him alone.

You're hurting me.

Tommaso was the key encounter of my adolescence.

Like Brian Eno for U2,

and coach Bearzot for the Italian soccer team.

Glory and disgrace had him as driving power.

Hi Piero. Good morning.

Bye Susy.

Bye mom.

With him, I set out to discover a whole new world...

which had nothing to do with my neighborhood.

With those afternoons studying in Mirko's store...

at the start of our friendship...

I remember skipping lots of meals.

Tiananmen, commander Marcos,

Mandela and the Panther Movement,

Zhang Yimou, Peter Jackson, Tondelli...

getting high, Kurt Cobain, kissing and being kissed...

Smelly feet.

Coming home at dawn with my head spinning.

What time is it?

It's late.

You know if you don't say good night to him he doesn't go to sleep

But what do you care...

you're on you own in the morning.

Good night, Piero.

Good night, go to sleep.

The days passed, the panther was caught,

the students had returned to their places,

but that seat in the second-to-last row was always empty.

Mansani beggar, Paladine bogus anarchist.

Get out.

You're the one who taught me what's important.

That's why I could appreciate Tommaso when I met him,

otherwise I would have judged him by his appearance...

which was repulsive.

Tell me about this Tommaso guy.

You could have dreamed him up.

He's funny, smart, an elegant bum.

Really?

He's a living paradox.

The kind of guy we both like.

Everyone is unique in his own way,

but certain people are made in many different ways...

on the surface, they seem simple...

but inside, there's much more.

He's smooth, sharp, cultured,

attractive, with a nice profile and a nice smell too.

Okay, so she's nice.

She's the nicest person I know.

She should be the pride of this town.

I don't like nice people.

I understand.

In the sense that being nice is a fade mafioso virtue.

Typically italian.

In France, England, they don't try to be good...

they care for real virtues. That's it, right?

I was wrong to say Giovanna is nice. I belittled she.

She's so much more.

Only assholes are nice, right?

Good. Can you pay? I've got no money.

This music will have to do.

I've stopped trying to keep up with the latest hits.

Tschaikovsky, the Pathetic,

the Second Mvement, the best one.

How's the Ratatouille?

Exceptional.

A kind of semolina with peppers?

Kind of.

The wine should be cool enough now.

He's not as repulsive as you said, he even brought flowers.

I told him to buy them and not to steal from city flowerbeds.

He never has any money, I think he's poor.

What do his parents do?

He said his father's a gardener, a thief.

He's dead.

I don't think he has a mother.

Where does he sleep?

All over the place.

One time he even slept at my brother's feet.

To my friend Piero,

and this enchanting angel.

Three cheers for Livorno.

For our second course something unusual and tres chic.

Chinese shrimp?

Roasted chicken and potatoes.

Everlasting, like The Infinite by Leopardi,

and the San Remo music fest. I get the thigh.

No, I get it.

There should be two.

What's the law of potatoes?

There are never enough.

The inescapable cartesian axiom.

Descartes wrote about potatoes?

That's right.

Descartes is from the 1600s and potatoes were brought

from America in the 1500s, right?

You know, you're pretty funny.

Another drop.

The night took on a french flavor...

We talked about Mallarmé, Truffaut, Henry Levy,

about a special wine called Sauterne...

I felt as happy as a character out of Flaubert...

I ignored what was about to happen...

but let's not get ahead of ourselves.

Tommaso and Giovanna went to get some dessert.

Where's the nutcracker?

It always gets lost.

And the scissors?

Who knows where they end up...

there's a parallel universe a virtual world...

inhabited by nutcrackers and scissors.

I hate the word virtual,

I hate when they say I'm at the office,

I hate it intrigues me. This book intrigues me.

It's almost worse than engaging and offensive.

What are you doing?

We spent the rest of dinner practically in complete silence.

Something inside me did not want to think of something.

My ears were ringing.

It was my mind racing...

to avoid thinking about what it was thinking about.

Thanks for dinner, see you soon.

Don't ever bring him here again.

In the next days Giovanna called me a lot,

but I didn't feel like talking.

Tommaso just disappeared.

They say Paladini won't be coming to school anymore.

You're not friends anymore?

Mind your fucking business.

How nice.

I'm just telling you because I found this under the desk.

If you can give it to him, fine,

otherwise, I don't give a shit.

Actually I can't stand the guy.

He didn't come today either?

Tommaso?

Do you know where I can find him?

How are you doing?

Okay.

His mother always hangs up on me.

His mother? He has a mother?

You know nothing about him, do you?

Neither do I.

I've gotta go.

What should I know?

What happened?

Nothing.

I mean...

I'll call you. No, you call me.

Again form my diary of those days...

Friday, December 18,

I feel angry, shocked and shamed of myself.

Who's Tommaso? And who's Giovanna?

What happened between them?

Who am I?

Why do I want to strangle Tommaso?

Think about it.

I think I've got the wrong house.

I'm new around here.

I'm on my way. Good boy.

Excuse me, I was looking for...

your son, I think.

My son?

Where can I find him?

He died six years ago.

Who are you?

Dead for six years?

You're not Tommaso's father.

Would I be here shoveling?

Dolores...

this young man is looking for signorino Tommaso.

He's not here, he's in Rome.

He's in Rome at his uncle's place.

You want the address and number?

Sure, thanks.

If only I had understood our teacher's little game

about famous relations

I would have figured out who Tommaso was,

the son of Mr. Paladini, Knight of Rodi,

commendatore, owner of a pier in the industrial port...

and head of Palchimica Ins, which for twenty years

has been polluting my neighborhood with its toxic exhaustions.

Sorry, I know it's a bad time...

but something incredible has happened.

Did I wake you?

I know you and I have lost touch recently,

but we're good friends, right?

So I said I'll go talk to my friend right away, is that okay?

Talk about what?

Brace yourself...

I broke up with Katia

after six years. Can you believe it?

I'm a wreck.

C'mon.

I told her

I took you to the movies to see Cristopher Lambert

to see the Vallesi concert in Ponsacco,

I took you to the Pitignano market there was a big sale...

and just once, I wanted to see the stunt car.

I even had free tickets.

You want to deny me this satisfaction?

You're being unfair. Am I right?

Yeah, but don't speak so loud.

I'm glad you agree with me.

What, are you going somewhere?

I'm going to Rome

to look for my friend.

You know what, Piero ol' buddy?

I've got a nice surprise for you.

Another one?

I'm coming with you.

Just like old times, remember?

No.

We never took a trip together?

I don't think so.

You see? I'm all messed up...

I may be out of mind but I know what I want...

to live my life. Enough with these chains, Katia,

mom, the store, all that.

Right, Piero? I'm coming with you,

plus I've never been to Rome.

Are we taking the train?

They say there' a bunch of stations in Rome.

You have to be careful not to make a mistake.

Rome Olympic Stadium,

Rome Vatican, Rome Termini, Rome Terminillo...

Where are we getting off?

Take it easy, I don't have any money. I have to hitch-hike.

I don't even know where I'm going to sleep.

I don't think it's a good idea for you to come, Mirko. Think about it.

Piero, my friend, I have thought about.

I'm coming.

Rome! Rome-ward bound.

Taste, you want?

My mom made it.

No eat? I have potato chips,

snack for baby,

Pecorino cheese. They make it here,

Capalbio 7 km! Can you believe it?

There's Occhetto's oak,

the symbol of new communist party.

Piero too, right?

Would you pipe down...

They're nice.

The swedes have always been very cool,

take Stenmark and Björn Borg...

That reminds me, is he still dating Loredana Berte?

I'm not a lady,

but a woman with just star in her life.

If only Katia was here to see this awesome...

meanwhile I was thinking...

when I get there, I'll be cool...

I'll ask for an explanation without getting pissed off...

I'll try to be aloof, like the english do.

No way! My best buddy.

Give me a hug.

He's awake

What happened?

Your buddy slugged you...

you Livorno guys are expressive.

Did he take off?

He's in the john with nosebleed.

The count socked him, something just came over him.

Sorry, I don't know what got into me.

He hit you, I hit him.

The kid who's with him is over there.

Did you hit him too?

He took a few drags and passed out.

He's gone

Livorno! Wake up.

You're crazy.

What about you?

Did you come here to knock me out?

Don't tempt me, I'll do it again.

Why did you do it?

Are you gonna tell me or do I have to guess?

I get it.

You saw my house and you were shocked

horrors! My father's rich. Is it my fault?

May be it is, since even I'm ashamed to admit it.

I promise I'll waste it all as soon as I can.

Then will you forgive me?

It's not that...

I ran into Giovanna.

How's she doing?

Badly, it seems

that night I tried to kiss her

I realized I had gone too far,

so the next night I called her...

You called her.

to apologize,

we talked all night,

and then I went to her place

and slept together.

In her bed?

Where else? On the floor?

She was acting strange the next morning.

She felt guilty

Go figure.

She said get out of here,

then she ran after me grabbed me by the hair,

then she said sorry gave me a kiss and burst out laughing,

she sat down and said I don't feel good,

and then she started crying,

I told her I'd see her again that evening.

But you never went.

I was on my way but I ran out of gas,

I started hitch-hiking,

and this really nice chick

on her way to Rome picked me up...

So you came to Rome with her.

I'm sorry, man, really, but what can I do?

Where're you going?

Home. What's there to do here?

Wait, let me see my cousin Lisa tonight,

then we'll take off.

What, you wanna leave me here feeling guilty?

Too good.

Plate, please.

This sauce is out of this world

with the bacon my mom sells at the shop.

Check it out they eat pasta that's half-cooked,

they say it's easier to digest,

they're kinda weird here in Rome,

they smoke that wacky weed,

I took a puff 'cause I'm open-minded but I didn't feel anything.

Rome didn't change me a bit.

Do you want to eat something?

Finally, you made it.

She's swedish.

She looks like a couple of friends I met.

Hi Lisa. The owner of the house.

Hi, you must be Lisa, Tommaso's cousin.

I think I've seen you somewhere before.

Just for a second.

I don't think so.

I'm Piero Mansani. And this is my friend...

Nice to meet you, Mainardi.

You want something to eat?

Thanks.

Sit down, make yourself comfortable.

Now I remember where I saw you...

in a picture in Tommaso's diary.

You were wearing a dark green jacket,

Doc Martens boots and a striped scarf,

but you had shorter hair, I think,

a bus was passing behind you,

the number 94 bus,

I mean I think so, I just glanced at it.

Tommy, any calls?

This Fabio guy, and Giancarlo,

and someone with a funny name Alexa Max...

Alexa? Wasn't he in jail?

Your friend in jail? What'd he do?

Resisting arrest.

He kicked out the window of a cruiser

and put a cop in the hospital.

Why? Why? Are you joking?

Cops are helpful,

without them, the criminals would do whatever they wanted.

Think about your uncle, they would steal everything he's got.

If he didn't let them, they'd kick his ass.

Did you hear that?

I can't believe this friend of yours.

What did I say?

Let's see if you can follow this...

Cops don't serve us,

they only defend the interests of the powers that be...

What powers?

What, are you stupid? The state.

So what? We're the state.

Are you sure?

Let me ask you something, buddy. Do you believe in Santa Claus?

What's Santa Claus got to do with it?

Italian cops. I've always liked them,

even the carabinieri,

cops have a cooler more modern look though.

Piero where are you going?

I'm just going in there.

My little buddy from Livorno you're one of a kind.

I was looking for the bathroom

then I thought the stereo was bothering you.

Do me a favor, hand me a cigarette.

Come here. Sit down.

What's going on in there?

Nothing. Just talking.

Talk with me.

About what?

Who are you?

Piero Mansani,

we talked earlier, remember?

I go to school with your cousin,

the guy with a cool family.

Tommaso told you that.

I bet you're a libra.

Pisces.

No way.

You should get a tattoo of two little fish.

I never thought about it.

Wouldn't it hurt?

Tell me, why do you live here all alone?

Are your folks on vacation?

Mom is traveling with Greenpeace

and dad's in San Francisco with his new girlfriend, Claire...

She was his patient, anorexic,

manic-depressive, a real pain in the ass.

Your dad's a doctor?

Psychiatrist.

Really?

And you? Do you study?

Last year, I was in art school.

Then after attempting suicide

my folk sent me to Chateaubriand...

which is an awful place full of spoiled brats.

Suicide attempt?

I tried twice.

How many times have you tried?

Just about every day,...

it's basically a mental exercise,...

it's a normal juvenile compulsion,...

or so it seems, who knows...

One time I swallowed

two bottles of pills that I found in my dad's office,

they pumped my stomach.

Then another time I injected a syringe full of air into my vein...

Happiness is the disease of imbecile.

Who said that?

Rimbaud, Celine...

I made it up.

You're just a smalltown kid...

who believes everything he's told. Right?

Say yes.

That's right.

You're cute.

Now I'm going to sleep, but don't go away.

If I wake up, we'll keep talking,

and you keep telling me I'm right.

I'm leaving.

To where?

Home. You staying?

Are you kidding? Wait.

Wait up, you taking off without telling me?

During the trip home Tommaso warned me about his cousin...

he said she was a lunatic who just wanted to make guys drool...

and didn't give a damn about anyone.

I reassured him.

Me? In love? Are you kidding?

Three months later...

Don't bother leaving a message I don't listen to them anyway...

hope you don't mind me leaving another message.

Another two lines I wrote down.

I don't know how you, so exhausted

can resist in this lake of apathy that is your heart.

May be an amulet saves you,

that you keep close to your lip liner.

Are you out of your mind?

Please, I'm on the phone.

That's the hundredth call this morning all long-distance.

You sleep all day, don't go to school...

Get out of here.

Not a chance, you get out of here.

I can't stand it here anymore.

You made your brother cry.

He may be dumb, but you know...

he only goes out to see his mother at the cemetery.

You hurt his feelings.

Now he's afraid to talk to you.

Months passed, I didn't get one phone call, one message.

People had started to go on vacation.

I said no, do it yourself.

You haven't written anything, obviously.

I'm done, may be I'll hand it in maybe I won't.

Maybe I'll have it published.

Will I see you later?

No, I'll see you tomorrow.

I don't think I'm coming tomorrow.

Then the day after tomorrow.

My cousin's coming tomorrow, I'm going to pick her up.

Lisa?

She's on the way to Corsica.

Listen, tell her I said hello.

Maybe it's better if you get her.

I've been absent too many times. You can borrow my moped.

Mansani, Paladini.

Sorry

Paolo, how are you?

Tommaso couldn't make it so I came to get you.

Isn't Livorno on the sea? I want to go swimming.

We've got nothing but the sea

on the way to the coast, I thought.

Paolo, Giovanne, call whatever you want

as long as you keep holding me like this.

Check out this dive, it's called 'the cannonball'.

Did I splash you?

Tomorrow I'll take you to the beach.

The sand there, it's like being in the Caribbean.

Thank to the run-off from the bicarbonate factory.

Don't you have to study?

Everything's under control.

Paolino, you're a madman.

Paolino?

What's wrong?

What do you think of someone who when he sees someone he loves...

realizes she feels bad...

but pretends he didn't see anything?

He doesn't even have the guts to say hello.

Someone who love, who?

Don't worry about it I know the answer.

You're a sensitive little guy.

A coward, I never have the guts.

Even now with you.

For example, I would die before asking you to kiss me.

Then you're proud. It's a virtue.

Come here.

Hey, thanks.

You're welcome.

I make you laugh, don't I?

So then maybe I'm in love...

because someone in love acts like this ridiculous.

You don't seem ridiculous to me.

So I guess you're not in love.

It's understandable.

Someone like you in love with someone like me?

What are you talking about?

It wasn't the first time I had touch a woman's body,

but there was no comparison.

That time with my second cousin Patrizia doesn't count.

One time, she smothered me with kisses and her big tits.

Now she's a kindergarten teacher.

I hope those poor kids are okay.

Paolo.

Then there was Marina.

We called her 'Vespucci', like the navy training ship.

This floozy weaned most of the adolescents in the neighborhood.

I want to tell you a lot of things.

Go ahead.

First of all, my name isn't Paolo.

What is it?

It's Piero, but it doesn't matter.

Then I have a proposal,

let's stay right here, today, tomorrow, the day after tomorrow.

But I'm leaving soon.

To be frank, if I were you I wouldn't go to Corsica.

The ferries are uncomfortable, they're always late.

Sometimes they even sink.

It's too hot there in the summer, the vegetation is really dry,

perfect conditions for deadly fires,

and then there are attacks by independence fighters.

Dying on vacation must be really suck.

Do you like the idea of dying?

Then let's die together, right here.

We'll hold hands and jump into the canal.

But I told you, Ernesto's waiting for me with the ticket.

I wouldn't even take a bus with

someone named Ernesto.

Why?

Just kidding.

I joke too much, don't I? Then here's something serious.

Go ahead.

I love you.

Lisa went to meet Ernesto.

The ferry left right on time...

and despite my prayers, it didn't sink.

Now about D'Annunzio's work.

DeBenedetti talked about a sort of deductive mechanism.

Discuss the concept in light of the analysis made during the year

on decadentism and the doctrine of the superman.

In light of the analysis we did in class

on decadentism and the doctrine of superman

we can say that when DeBenedetti talked...

About those things you said.

I pretty much agree.

So you don't like D'Annunzio either?

With all due respect, he's the worst.

Let's review. Carducci was a windbag,

Pascoli was smarmy,

Manzoni paternalistic.

Tell us which author you like.

This year I read some great stuff

Ian MacEwan, Benni, Pennac,

Andrea Pazienza's comics,

they have a literary dignity.

A fantastic book by Chatwin, 'Songlines',

Nelson Mandela's biography,

that man has had an incredible life.

You know this, right?

You know this?

You don't?

Even in your written exam you showed a commendable 'verve',

but you completely missed the subject.

You began with Leopardian pessimism,

and you got lost in an incomprehensible tirade

against tourism, ferries,

and you seem to have something against those who go to Corsica.

Quite frankly, I don't know what to say.

You're right, neither do I.

Who cares about church reform,

about Vittorio Amedei II of Aosta,

and his son Carlo Emanuele III?

Watch out.

My dad let me drive here when I was a kid.

Take it easy.

I told them let's talk about Saddam Hussein,

U.S. oil policy,

and what the fuck we're gonna do in the European Union.

You'd have done that without banging your shoe on the table.

Kruschev did it at the U.N. too.

Yeah, but his feet didn't stink.

Who give a shit, they'll fail us both.

We're rejects, human garbage.

Speak for yourself.

That night, I realized that destiny would separate us.

I failed because of that exam and that I had too many absences.

He passed, but just barely.

They said his father had intervened to protect his heir,

but I think the school just wanted to get rid of that ball-breaker.

Who left for Greece before going off to university.

I decided not to go back to school.

Maybe I would look for work but taking my time.

Let's go.

I don't feel like it.

He's not coming.

C'mon? Diving.

I don't want to. Go play with Diana.

Let's see how far you get by not doing shit all day.

There's nothing to eat, deal with it.

They say melancholy is just the presence of a neurotransmitter

called serotonin in your brain.

It makes you dangle like dead leaves.

You get used to the agony and you never want to get better.

I was all alone.

I didn't even have Mirko around.

He joined the police force and was part of the security team

for an important anti-mafia judge.

Good morning.

I'm looking for Ms. Giovanna Fornari.

Visiting hours are at five.

Are you a relative?

A friend.

Come with me.

It's nothing but tears here and I love crying.

Doesn't this lady have any relatives?

Not in Livorno. Why?

Someone should talk to her.

She doesn't eat, doesn't sleep,

refuses to take her medicine.

The other day she slapped the doctor.

What's wrong with her?

They used to call it a breakdown, now who knows what it's called.

Talk to her.

Thank you.

Sweetie, I'm so happy to see you.

What a nice surprise.

How are you?

Great.

I had a little breakdown and would've already gone home,

but the doctor is so arrogant he said I had to take all the tests.

He's holding me hostage.

How are you?

Not bad.

You owe me an explanation, how could you fail?

I was an idiot, they were right to fail me.

It happens. You'll do great this year.

I want to see a perfect score, ok?

Let me see you. You've gotten taller.

You've put on weight, you look good.

You look thinner.

I'm trying to keep up with fashion.

An anorexic top model.

As soon as I get home we'll have a big dinner.

We'll have chickpea pie.

My mouth is already watering.

My sweetie.

What a surprise.

That september, dad got out of jail.

He took that job at cousin Riccardo's garage,

but he always got up late and never went to work.

See you, dad

Where are you going?

To the employment office, maybe they have some new jobs.

Sit down, you're always in a rush.

I'm late.

You've changed.

Of course I have.

Too much, I mean.

I'll see you at lunch.

Before christmas the cops came to take him away again.

He'd stolen a car with two gypsies as accomplices,

but he had enough time to get Mara pregnant again.

Nice one.

Awesome.

9,200,250

He broke the piggy bank.

That's all I have.

You're in bad shape.

Take this, smoke to Sergino's health.

Hey!

What an honor for our bowling alley: The great Piero Mansani!

How are you?

Not bad. You look good.

Are you running out to one of your million commitments?

No.

We're going to have a pizza later.

If you don't have anything better to do

And my friends don't even look at me.

This is my first love.

I had a crush on him and he didn't even look at me.

What a fool.

Thanks, but I left my wallet at home.

It's my treat.

After graduation, I applied for a job at the hospital.

And lucky, they hired me right away.

The salary isn't bad, I'm saving up to rent an apartment.

That's great, and you probably have a boyfriend too.

Tell me about it.

I broke up with Alessandro in July.

A total idiot. His life was the gym,

soccer and the stadium.

I saw all the Livorno game.

Home and away.

Fascinating.

Isn't it?

And let's not even talk about sex.

One time after we had done it.

I saw he was down, so I asked him: Anything wrong?

He said: I'm not satisfied with my pecs and lower abs.

When you and I were going out so to speak,

I used to play a silly game, when I heard you coming down

I would run to the peephole and say

he's wearing an orange t-shirt.

If I guessed right you were in love with me.

It couldn't have been hard,

I always wore the same clothes.

That's how I fooled myself.

Thank for the pizza, goodnight.

No problem.

Wait!

Sorry, but I thought,

who know when I'll get another chance.

I thought check out Susy,

and also maybe I could give it a try.

Maybe I'll look for her tomorrow.

But instead, they came looking for me guys from the military.

Three months of training in Barletta.

Then to Rome's grenadiers,

where, during leave, I reminisced

about that brief trip to the capital years ago.

The TV presenter Frizzi.

lives here with his wife Rita.

The TV host Maria Giovanna Elmi lives over there

with her husband Gianfranco and their daughter Marianna.

Next door to the anchor-man Funari who moved to Milan.

His first wife lives here with their daughter.

You romans just can't understand,

you're used to living with celebrities.

But it's different for us Hick.

Mansani, tell them.

I was saying, whoever was born in Rome doesn't understand.

Where's he going?

Bastard! Get your hands off her.

Running away, huh?

You okay?

What are you doing here?

Transferring vehicles,

but I'll be sent near home soon.

I had my big shot uncle recommend me for the post.

It's great to see you.

Me, too.

Where'd you go? I missed you.

Mansani, what the hell.

I'm right here! Duty calls.

You look cute in uniform.

You too, even without a uniform.

Call me.

My uncle was such a big shot that I was sent to the extreme north

to guard the inviolable.

I called Lisa, but I always got the usual machine.

I thought it was over between us but then...

I found a train that was coming up here,

so I thought I'd surprise you.

Do you mind?

Want something else?

I don't know what we can do now,

this place only has video games,

and a bar with a juke box.

The closest cinema is in Udine

I could borrow a car,

but I don't have a license. Do you?

Let's go upstairs.

What's wrong?

I feel a bit...

I have to be back in barracks in twenty minutes

or I'm in big problem.

Sorry.

Tomorrow I'll get a pass and I'll come get you

and we go for a ride.

Gorizia is pretty interesting.

You're going?

There's this sergeant who's been picking on me.

You make me sick.

What?

You were right, you're a coward, even worse, a liar.

You said you love me. It's not true. You don't love me.

It's been a long time.

No one likes me.

That's not true.

I never want to see you again.

Maybe it's better if we talk tomorrow.

I never saw her again.

I heard she joined a buddhist ashram.

She's doing okay and she has a boyfriend, a holy man.

I'd like to take the opportunity to thank this Buddha.

Because Lisa could have met a bad end.

Like poor Giovanna.

She swallowed all the medicine,

she has refused to take all in one gulp.

So you're looking for work?

I've applied everywhere, even at your father's factory.

I hope they bomb the place it's polluting half the city.

Anyway, you live in the other half.

Now I live in Pisa.

You must have taken a lot of exams.

Not even one.

The school is a dumping ground for small time losers,

but some folks are really interesting,

like the ones who do theater with me.

What are you doing?

We're working on Dostoievsky.

Our first play debuts on sunday.

What's it about?

Come, so you can see for yourself.

Welcome to St. Petersburg Piotr Nedovic Mansanski.

Seem like you've decided to be happy at any cost.

What are you doing? You crazy?

Welcome to St. Petersburg.

Come sleep with us Pavel Pavlovic,

Miss Claudia Petrovna, and I await you for tea.

Hey there handsome stranger.

Do you know how to dance?

I'm a friend of Tommaso's.

Come with me.

Velcaninov is very angry with you.

Who?

You're a handsome scoundrel.

Take advantage of this poor body it'll cost you just a few kopecs.

Really, I don't have a lira.

This won't cost you anything, stranger.

Wretched bourgeois.

You think men are dogs.

You judge everyone in your small-minded way.

You're all vermin, you disgust me.

Disgusting.

Shut up, you fool.

I liked it. I've never been to the theater.

I thought I'd be bored,

but instead it was like being in St. Petersburg, not Pisa.

Are you messing with me?

No. But I didn't understand the plot very well.

Go to hell, you and the plot.

Here you go, handsome stranger.

Tommaso didn't even introduce us.

Piero, Cristina, my... what are you?

My concubine, lover, geisha,

whatever you want, I love him.

Please to hear it.

She's cute. Congratulations.

I didn't know you were attached.

If your want to take advantage

I saw how you two were kissing.

Actually...

I know, I know, she kissed you.

She also stuck her tongue in the light technician's mouth.

Maybe she just wanted to draw my attention.

Too bad, she's really cute.

This fucking love that you all talk about depressed me.

I just want to live like a dog

and rummage through the garbage of life,

like that hungarian poet used to say...

What's his name?

Give it a rest, like my uncle from Lucca used to say...

That night, I got over any regrets I had about not studying.

I was lucky because at the time, April 1994,

I was unexpectedly blessed by the new Italian miracle.

I got one of those million jobs

that the new government promised

at Tommaso's father's factory,

without even a recommendation.

The job waiting list is a kind of

hit parade of the unlucky ones.

With a dead mother, a dad in prison and a handicapped brother,

I entered the top ten triumphantly.

Keep in mind that Genercomit Europa is gaining

but the Fideuram Index is low.

You won't do shit with the Fideuram Index.

Actually, it's important.

You have to go with secure Italian commodities,

capital credit, for example, has been performing well.

If you ask me

there's no question marks or treasury bonds.

How much have you invested?

Nothing, but if I had money.

My co-workers, most of them older and married,

were much different than what I'd imagined.

During my revolutionary high school days

they used to pick on me, but they like me

because I tried to lighten up the endless work day.

So does Pip get together with Estrella?

Piero, does he?

Hold on.

First, there's the inheritance he got from the convict.

The guy Pip helped out?

Yeah, and after finding him with his friend Herbert.

He tries to help him escape to Australia,

but he fails,

after the daring escape by boat on the Thames

he is arrested.

They arrested Pip?

You idiot. The other one

does he get together with Estrella?

Wait.

After the fire which kills Mrs. Avisham,

Estrella free herself from the old woman and goes with Pip,

and then they fuck.

It doesn't say in the story.

I really identified with Uncle Joe.

He was kind and patient with Miss Gargery.

It was like seeing myself with my wife.

Bube has to hide out because they're after him

and Mara decides to stay with him at the hunters' shed,

and they fuck.

Right.

And then the party car comes to take them away to Russia.

Does she go with him?

She stays and waits for him,

she finds a job,

and she goes out with a really nice guy,

and they have a lot of fun,

and she fuck him too.

God, you are disgusting.

No, they don't fuck.

Everyone knows she's Bube's girl,

and she wants to remain faithful to him.

In fact, when Bube comes back for the trial...

They convict him?

He killed a cop and his son.

They won't give him a medal.

Right, Piero?

Are you Mansani?

You're expected in the manager's office.

Order in the court.

We can only take three opinions.

I think they're going to fire him.

I think they're going to promote him.

I think they're going to fuck.

This way.

Who wants to see me?

Mr. Paladini, in the conference room.

Mr. Mansani.

Dear Piero, finally.

I trouble you because we wanted to surprise Tommaso.

Today is his birthday. Do you know my wife?

Diletta, this is Piero.

Chiara, her sister, director of personnel.

Lucarelli, my son-in-law.

The commercial director, Mr. Bruni.

All set? We have the candle.

Turn off the lights.

You're all crazy, I'm out of here.

Blow the candles out.

Speech.

His dad spoke, announcing that Tommaso was going to the States.

Since he hadn't done anything in Pisa,

they sent him to Harvard.

He said he couldn't wait for Tommaso to take his place

so he could enjoy his retirement in Cuba with commies and palms,

but may be he was joking, who knows.

Tommaso has told me so much about you and you family.

Your father, the poor dear.

I know.

I made you a little package from what was left over, so you can

bring it to your brother and the woman who lives with you,

and give them my best regards. I mean it, I care.

Thank you, you shouldn't have.

Let's go.

Are you really going to America?

Yeah, but if they think I'm going to study business administration...

I already know the low-down on Boston's jazz clubs.

There's a cool artists' community

It's only two hours by train to New York.

Why don't you come too?

Me? To do what?

Just come, you'll see when you get there.

Maybe one of these days.

Check it out. Dad's present.

Useless, I can't even take it to Boston.

Wanna go for a ride?

No, I have to go back in,

otherwise your father'll fire me.

My friend.

Good luck.

I got you all dirty.

When I get there I'll call you and give you my address.

I got home depressed that day.

As if all I had ahead of me was my pension.

Luckily, I was wrong.

On the luggage rack?

Yeah, thanks.

Moving?

Yep.

I'll put this over there.

I found a lovely apartment.

Top floor, with a view of the fortress.

You have to come see me.

If you want, right now so I can help.

Great.

I don't pay much either 120,000 with rent control.

Believe that?

A teacher used to live here but they said she was transferred.

I think this is the key. I have to change the lock.

Great.

- What do you think? - Small, but it's got a certain charm.

Now it's empty, check out the terrace.

Buricchio.

You've never seen him before?

No.

Think he's hungry? C'mon. I'll give you some milk.

See how things turn out?

One person's misfortunes leave room for another's happiness,

where solitude and desperation used to live,

you can bring back a little I don't know what it called...

Hope? Joy? Love?

They're all big words but you got the picture.

Were you careful?

Not me. Were you?

You didn't take, you didn't have

nothing.

Oh God.

Honey.

What's wrong? Are you crying?

From that day on we saw each other every day.

In exchange for some odd jobs I found dinner on the table.

Not like that, you have to brush,

that's why it didn't work.

She convinced me to get that damned diploma by self study.

Unification of Italy?

Porta Pia?

Crispi government.

18,851,886.

Colonial policy.

That's enough.

You want your son to have an ignorant father?

What do I care, I don't have kids and I don't want any.

You're not pregnant, are you?

Six weeks.

What do we do now?

I didn't tell you so you could decide what to do.

I've already decided.

You want to keep it.

Definitely.

What if they don't renew my contract, what if I'm unemployed?

Who asked you for anything, I have a job.

I get a year's maternity leave, my mom will help me out.

Are you hungry?

So what, I don't count?

Do what you want.

I can tell people that he's the son of a hospital patient.

A fallen aristocrat whom I made happy on his death bed.

You're joking. You're crazy

A kid is a huge responsibility.

I feel sick.

Poor baby, he's sick.

That's right.

If it's a girl, you've got to call her Giovanna,

like Joan of Arc. I was thinking Valentina.

Martina.

No, Giovanna sounds better, Giovanna Mansani.

Can I have some water?

I've got something stuck right here

like I ate a hard-boiled egg with the shell.

It doesn't go up or down.

In July I got my diploma.

In September we took the leap.

The ceremony was nice, even though a bit tiring.

There was Mirko who had married Katia.

They're expecting a second kid.

He risked his life protecting that judge in Sicily,

then lost his hand in a stupid accident,

but not his sense of humor.

With the compensation he opened a sandwich bar.

He told me: "I need a hand",

and burst into laughter.

Every now and then I work for him to make a little extra.

Dad is almost done going time.

If all goes well, he'll be out before Christmas.

Big Ivano is doing really well.

The doctors finally faced the facts.

A swiss psychiatrist from Lucca

is writing an article on his case.

He goes out alone now and spends time with his African buddies.

I'd pay to know what they talk about

and in what language.

I figure maybe he's not retarded.

Maybe he's just a foreigner.

Giovanna was born in October.

Everyone says she looks exactly like me when I was a baby.

Thanks to my diploma I'm working with computers.

One day I happened to find

the website of one Tommy Paladini from Boston.

He offers catalogs of online exhibits, bootleg tapes,

maps of alternative Boston, all at give-away prices.

One of these days I'm gonna send him some e-mail.

Every morning, before bringing Giovanna to daycare,

and going to the hospital,

Susy drives me to work

and rain or shine she always says the same thing.

You get more handsome everyday.

And I go to work nice and happy.

Maybe I've become a complete idiot

or maybe just I'm happy except for that sort of

hard-boiled egg inside which doesn't go up or down

but which keeps me company now like an old friend.