Original subtitles

Start shooting already.

Come on, you're missing my best stuff.

Man, if that's your best stuff, hang it up.

You ain't getting on TV with that weak sauce.

Hey, if he gets on that show,

I get ten percent of his winnings,

'cause I taught him that trick.

I get ten percent because it's my video.

You're both crazy. Ten percent of nothing is nothing.

No one's tossing us cash to just ride around.

What the hell?

What are you doing?

We shouldn't be here.

A bag of Benjamins.

We're rich!

Yo, come on, y'all! Let's get out of here!

Good morning, sunshine.

What's for breakfast?

- Hey. - Hey!

Where'd you go?

I had to go pick something up.

You got yourself a dog?

Oh, no, that'd be crazy. I got Ben a dog.

You got a dog that'll live here?

Without even mentioning it?

See, that kind of crazy. Why...

It turns out, kids love dogs. See, Ben and I

were walking past this little adoption place

the other day, Ben sees this guy,

and he freaks out.

It's like the dog spoke to him.

Well, I wish the dog would've spoken to me.

I know, but I had to act fast.

Look at this little face.

Someone was gonna take him.

Aw, that's true. He's...

This is a very cute face.

Besides, I can help with walking the dog

and sitting with the dog

and picking up poop and all that good stuff.

If it doesn't work out,

we'll take him back to the adoption place.

Oh, yeah. You think you can show a puppy to a nine-year-old

and then return it?

No way!

Hey, look what followed me home!

Is this for real?

Can we keep him?

Which one?

I think that's a yes.

So where are you?

Claremont. Visiting RJ. I told you.

No, you didn't.

I-I was in his neighborhood.

You drove an hour past your office in traffic?

And-and then I was in his neighborhood.

God. Please tell me you are not bringing him

another box of donuts.

Look, I love you.

I miss you. Bye.

Can I help you, sir?

Floyd, it's me.

RJ's dad.

We met, like, six times.

Oh! Right.

Is he here?

Uh, I don't know.

I haven't seen him since last night.

Or was that the night before?

Wait, is today Tuesday?

No, it's not Tuesday. You missed Tuesday.

Floyd, is RJ in class?

Why is that funny?

Oh, it's nothin'.

Inside joke.

Here, hold this.

I'm gonna text him.

I wouldn't worry about it.

I'm sure he's just at the movies or something.

He goes to the movies a lot.

At 9:30 in the morning?

You know what?

Tell him to call his father.

Roger Murtaugh.

Okay?

And, Floyd, go to class.

Our victim took two bullets

to the chest. Came out that window up there.

Name's Mike Greco.

Career criminal, mostly nonviolent.

Did you find the witnesses?

Witnesses?

Bicycle tires. Looks like

three of 'em.

Hey. Lunch is on me today.

That's evidence.

Why you got to be so grabby, Mr. Grabby Pants?

There's plenty where that came from. See?

Two semesters

divided by four classes,

meet twice a week for,

let's say, 13 weeks a semester...

Come on, Rog. Just let it go.

You let it go.

I got it. $248.

That's what it costs me.

Every time this kid cuts a class,

it costs me 248 bucks.

You know what, that's like burning money.

Do you have any idea

what that feels like?

I-I don't know.

Does it, uh...

d-does it feel something like this?

I have what we in the business call an operating theory.

- I'd love to hear it, but, first... - Greco,

our counterfeiter, was either killed by a disgruntled customer

or a disgruntled partner.

Wrong. And mostly wrong.

Can I help you?

Doesn't look like it.

You just went zero for two.

Roger, meet Hank Peterson,

living legend of the U.S. Secret Service.

"Living legend," huh?

What is that, like, a...

It's a moniker. A term of respect.

I know what a moniker is.

Agent Peterson is tagging in on our counterfeiting case.

- You're gonna love him. - Oh, yeah. The moniker

just told me that I'm oh for two.

Listen, I come on a little strong.

I lead with my canines.

But I want you to know,

I'm not here to step on any toes.

He's not here to step on any toes.

I got two weeks left in service.

I'm just looking for the finish line.

Guys like us, Roger,

we're chasing the sunset.

I'm not chasing the sunset.

I'm at noon.

Maybe 1:15.

30. 32...

Let's go meet your team.

Have you protected a president?

I can't tell you that.

But the answer's yes.

Have you taken a bullet?

No. Like I told Eastwood, when he played me

in the movie, the secret

is knowing how to stop the bullet before it's fired.

Okay, Agent Peterson is here

to share his expertise, not his made-up

and scientifically impossible theories.

This here is a nearly perfect bill.

The untrained eye won't catch the diminished fiber count

or the smudges on the microprinting.

No. There is only one way to track these beauties.

We issued a currency alert for the sequential

- serial numbers. - You need to flag the serial numbers.

That's what I was... I was just saying that.

Shh. I'm listening.

Don't you shush me.

I've spent the last 18 months

tracking these bills

and the counterfeiter behind them.

We call him Degas.

Anyone here know why?

Degas was an impressionist.

Because Degas was a renowned impressionist.

Great nickname.

Follow the money,

find the killer.

Well, since no one knows who Degas is

or what he looks like,

how do you know we don't have him downstairs on ice?

Well, actually,

I heard from his parole officer.

Greco was just released from Helendale

after a five-year stint.

Which means he was a hired grunt.

A bagman, a wheelman or inkman

who got into a business dispute with Degas

and got two bullets for his trouble.

A business dispute?

That's what someone was saying

for the past ten minutes.

Secret Service men don't care about credit.

I mean, on one hand, you know, there's...

Burt Reynolds.

On the other side, there's Chuck Norris.

This is the important, life-changing question

you wanted to discuss?

What to name your dog?

Uh, you get one opportunity to name a dog, Doc.

So, yes. What could be more important?

Off the top of my head,

maybe the phone call from your father?

That's old news.

Since that phone call,

you've really embraced your role

with Ben. Don't-don't get me wrong.

It's nice.

It's-it's almost... parent-like.

Why do you insist on ruining everything with your words?

Why do you think your father called?

Why do you think he reached out?

Doc, he wants me to come see him.

How did you respond?

I hung up.

- And if you're gonna suggest that I should entertain his offer... - No, no, no.

Considering what I know about your childhood,

I think the walls and the boundaries you've built

with your father are healthy.

Look at that.

We fixed me!

All right, I'm out of here.

Riggs, with one phone call,

your father's voice can be back in your head,

whether you want it there or not.

I just want you to pay attention to how you deal with that,

especially as it concerns...

Things are going great with Molly and I.

All right? And I'm killing it with Ben.

See, my old man, he actually gave me the secret

to being a great father...

just do the opposite of everything he did.

Degas,

real,

Degas...

What's the living legend doing?

Please, don't call him that. It goes to his head.

It's usually cash businesses that flag the fake green,

rarely hotels.

We caught a lucky break.

I sent dozens of alerts to hotels.

Okay? It's not

a lucky break. It's me.

It's a me break.

He's in the Skyview Suite, top floor.

Assume he's armed.

Oh, that's a great tip.

'Cause we wouldn't have assumed that.

Last time I was in this hotel,

protecting a certain silver-haired

- matriarch... - Okay, you know what,

we're gonna go upstairs.

You watch the lobby.

- I was enjoying the story. - It's Barbara Bush.

Code name Snowbank.

I heard it three times.

I'm just saying, humor the old man.

You know, like I do with you.

Hey.

Is this the Skyview Suite?

Thank God you guys are here.

It is a nightmare in there.

Party's over.

It's the Five-O.

Officer, this man abducted us.

What?

You took money off of a dead man?

No hablo inglés.

You just habla inglés a minute ago.

Hey, Rog.

Weren't there three sets of tracks in the alley?

Yeah, three bikes.

Where's your friend?

What friend?

Whoa, whoa, whoa!

- Watch out, watch out, watch out! - Hey!

Move, move, move, move!

Hey, yo, man!

Yo, yo!

All right.

The deal was doughnuts for info,

and right now I'm not getting much info.

How old are these doughnuts?

They're a little stale.

You know what's worse than stale? No donuts.

So, the guy with the gun,

what kind of mask was he wearing?

The kind that covered his face.

We didn't hang around to look

'cause he was shooting at us.

Well, what were you guys doing in that alley, anyway?

Trying to get rich.

That alley's got the perfect bank-to-wall setup.

That's where we film our tricks.

Wait a minute, you guys filmed all day?

Do you have all that video?

Nope. But it's all in the cloud.

In the cloud?

Come on.

Don't be that guy who doesn't understand the cloud.

I am not that guy.

I understand the cloud.

Trust me.

Hey, uh, Bowman, get me the cloud.

How-how did I lose him?

Are you serious? You're asking me questions?

Do you think I brought you down here

so that I can answer your questions?

Is that what you thought?

I wasn't saying anything.

I was just making conversation.

He gave a kid a hundred bucks to wear his hat.

You fell for that?

What's his name?

I'm not gonna rat out my friend.

Tyson. He goes by Ty.

Last name?

Hill.

And address?

I don't know. He doesn't have one.

Okay? No parents. He's a foster kid.

What do you mean, like they keep him in a group home?

They try. He always bounces.

Ty says group homes suck.

Where can I find him?

The audio's mostly a bust,

and we had to blow up the image, but...

You're underselling it. Hit play.

We're not gonna wait for Riggs?

Never wait for Riggs.

That man

is your partner.

Not cool.

Anywho...

there's our DOA six hours before he was shot.

Now watch the van.

And here's the only bit of sound we captured.

Do it again and you're dead to me.

So, we're thinking...

That Degas is Frida Kahlo.

Now you lost me.

'Cause the counterfeiter is a woman.

So...

Frida Kahlo.

But she's not an impressionist.

Yeah. She mostly did self-portraits.

I still like Degas.

Both of them.

Okay, you know what?

Bowman, trace the van.

Living legend, my ass.

Whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa.

Before you take off...

French dip from Cole's.

Change your life.

I had a place

like this once.

Would have killed for one of those.

No good, huh?

Philippe's is better.

Where you from?

I heard I was born in Albuquerque.

Not that I remember that.

So, what was your plan?

Take the cash and buy you a place on the water?

I like the beach.

I recognize this one.

Santa Monica.

You got a favorite?

Santa Monica. That's my favorite.

You never been to the beach, have you?

You gonna finish that?

I thought about it,

but I could be persuaded to, uh...

I don't know, maybe trade it

for a sack of cash and my wallet.

You sure this is the right address?

As sure as I was two minutes ago

when you asked.

Are you all right, Peterson?

Sorry. Nerves.

Two weeks to retirement.

I've seen some hairy stuff go down in elevators.

I got stories.

Oh, I bet you do.

Don't want to hear them, though.

This one time

- in New Haven... - Listen,

why don't I step off the elevator first?

That way, if bullets fly...

Seriously? You'd do that?

I'd view it as a... a win-win.

LAPD.

Put your hands in the air.

Put your hands in the air

- and back away from that desk. - Pick one.

I can't do both.

Mmm.

Did you kill Mike Greco?

He was shot upstairs in the warehouse.

Did you see wheelchair access to the second floor?

We did not.

We saw the video of you arguing with Mr. Greco

before he was killed.

I told him he was dead to me if he quit.

Why would I kill the best partner I've ever had?

Why would he want to quit?

He was scared.

A guy named Paul Mason

came to my gallery last month,

offering me $50,000 for some of my work.

He wanted to buy counterfeit cash?

He wanted to buy my plates so that he could print his own.

Mike got killed protecting my plates.

You find my plates,

and you'll find the guy who killed Mike.

All my cash better be in there.

You didn't have any money.

That was a test.

Get down and stay down.

Come on! Come on!

Let's get out of here.

Ty? Hey.

Buddy, you all right?

What about his group home?

We've been to every group home

he's ever stepped foot in. Schools.

His friends. Their friends.

There's a BOLO out

from San Diego to Ventura County.

We're not gonna find him.

And Riggs has a theory.

Look, I know this kid. All right? I was this kid.

He's not gonna be found unless he wants to be.

I think you're still this kid.

Ben was messing with my ringtones this weekend.

Anywho...

Would you answer it?

Hey, everything all right?

What?

All right, how long's he been missing?

Chuck Norris!

Chuck Norris!

Ben went in to get him some water.

Not even a minute.

He came back out, and the dog was gone.

Okay. Look, he can't be far,

- right? - What about his chip?

It's a GPS thing to locate him.

I-I don't think Chuck Norris came with one of those.

Dogs don't come with a chip.

You're supposed to get the chip for him.

And that's what we're gonna do, all right?

But first, we're gonna find him.

Honey, we are gonna do

our best.

We're gonna find him, guaranteed 100%, all right?

Go get your jacket.

- What are you doing? - What?

You promised him you'd find the dog. You can't do that.

Look, he's a wreck.

I'm just trying to make him feel better.

Until you don't find the dog.

I'm a highly-trained detective.

All right?

I think I'm capable of finding a puppy.

What if he's gone, Riggs?

You can't make that kind of promise to a kid.

What's going on with you?

Nothing.

It's good.

All right, let's go. Chuck Norris?

Hey. Uh, hey.

Where-where is everyone?

You're looking at 'em.

Have a seat.

Uh, Mom sent a message about a...

half-birthday bash for me.

Not-not true?

You're just so hard to reach lately.

We leave messages.

Your dad thinks you're trying to duck us.

- Wha...? - Mm-hmm.

What? No, I'm-I'm... I'm not trying to duck you guys.

I'm just busy.

You know, classes are crazy, but I'm trying really hard.

So, now that we have you here,

why don't you tell us all about it?

How is that Advanced Macroeconomics?

Oh, it's-it's great.

- Mm. - Uh, material's a little dry.

- Mm. - But Professor Watkins really brings it to life.

That's incredible, and by incredible,

I mean hard to believe, because I just spoke

to Professor Watkins a couple hours ago,

and he said... get this... you dropped his class.

Yeah, see, that's a misunderstanding.

- See, I... - To me,

in fact, he said you dropped both

- econ classes, physics and English. - I can explain.

- What are you taking?! - Okay.

Because Floyd says you go to the movies all day long.

Ro... Roger. Please. You...

- That's what Floyd was saying. - No. Stop it.

You have to give him a chance to answer.

I'm sure there's an explanation.

- Uh... - We trust your judgment, son.

Thank you, Mom.

I-I-I appreciate you for treating me like an adult.

I'm dropping out of college.

- I knew it! It's drugs. - You're doing what now?!

- You're dropping out? - What kind of drugs you doing?

Look, I'm miserable. I'm not cut out for it.

Look, I got a "D" on my bio midterm.

- A "D"?! - I got in there, I couldn't answer anything!

It's supposed to be hard!

We're not paying for a four-year party!

I just want to know why didn't you say anything?

Because I knew exactly what was gonna happen!

- What was gonna happen? - This!

- What is this? - This is what.

We're talking here!

- Well, I'm done. - Done with what?!

- Done with what? You better sit down. - RJ.

Feel free to keep yelling,

because you're not listening to me anyway.

- Whoa! Whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa. Young... - Where...? Hey, hey.

- You walk out that door, and you see what happens. - You better not walk out that...

RJ, you better not close that door.

- I dare you not... - - Oh.

Captain, uh, question for you.

You know Detective Riggs better than I do.

God, I hate questions that start like that.

So you know how Riggs's wallet was stolen?

I've been tracking his credit card and, uh, what are

the chances he purchased Fetty Wap's new album?

Wop and slim.

And a-a bus ticket to Albuquerque?

Call Riggs.

I'm-I'm in line, and this young man,

very polite young man

asks me where I'm going, and

offers to pay my fare.

Said-said it was a school project on elder care.

Did you get this kid's name?

Act-Actually, I-I wrote it down 'cause I wanted to send him

a thank you note.

"Marty Riggs." Two... two "Gs".

Have a nice trip.

- Outsmarted by a kid. - Twice.

So where to now, Marty?

Hey, kid?

Lot of people looking for you.

Yeah, I know.

All right, let's go.

Give it a minute.

You don't want to miss the best part.

Oy vey. I had the worst dream

that our firstborn dropped out of college.

How did we mess up so badly?

We?

We're his parents, Roger, and we just got

- a big fat "F" in raising a college student. - No.

Listen, we didn't

make him ready for the world.

We were just... too easy on him.

We were supportive.

No. Too supportive.

Every week,

you brought him a box of donuts.

- A box of love! - Oh, gosh.

And since we're pointing fingers, who was it

that drove him to school when he missed the bus?

You didn't teach him consequences.

Who told him he could bring his laundry home from college?

Who folded it and FedExed it back to him?!

Who fed his goldfish even after we made him sign a contract?

I was not gonna let Goldie die!

Ugh.

Okay, maybe there was a few missteps.

Can we just stipulate

that we, both of us,

did not give RJ the tools that he needs to succeed?

Stipulated.

We're terrible parents.

We need a plan, Roger.

We are not done raising our boy,

and he needs our help.

Look, Ty, you're safe.

All right, these guys aren't gonna come after you again.

They know that you don't have...

The plates? The moneymaker?

What? People talk, I listen.

The Secret Service has the plates.

And we know the bad guy lookin' for 'em.

And we're gonna find him.

What happens after that?

- He goes to jail. - No.

What happens to me? You're gonna send me

to some random foster home that has room on the couch?

Or a group home that doesn't even have that?

Ty, there are people out there that want to help you.

If you want to help me, then give me that bag of money.

- Let me keep doing what I've been doing. - So, what?

So you go find another junkyard to live in?

Look, you had a raw deal.

I get it, all right, but it happens.

Look, where you start in this world is not where

you end up.

People like you love to say stuff like that, man.

I bet I've spent more time

in group homes than you ever will.

You know, you're not the only kid to grow up without a family.

I didn't have a family then, and I don't have a family now.

But you know what I do have?

I have a job I love,

and I got a little place down at the beach.

If you don't want that, then maybe I can't help you.

Detective.

I wanted to say good-bye.

Leaving so soon? Say it isn't so.

The counterfeiter's in booking.

The plates are in my car.

I'm bringing 'em back to the field office.

Well, I won't hold you up.

Stairs are quicker,

especially if you throw yourself down.

Seriously, you enjoy your retirement.

You, too.

Again, I'm not retiring.

Come visit me in Whistler.

You'll change your tune.

It's a beautiful place for your final chapter.

Final ch...? You know what?

I need to not be a part of this conversation.

- Where is Riggs? - Oh, he's on a personal call. Family emergency.

Something about a... a dog?

Oh. This is why I told him, you don't get a kid a puppy.

He has no idea how to be a parent.

Found the dog, Riggs.

Uh, he was dead... on the side of the road.

I found him.

Less than 50 yards from the house.

I'm so sorry, Molly.

I should have been there to help you.

No. It's okay.

Then you would have had to lie to Ben instead of me.

Lie to Ben about what?

Well, I told him that the dog was hit by a car,

but he wasn't.

Somebody broke his neck.

Someone...

Are you sure?

Who does that to a dog?

Hey, Molly...

Look, I-I hate to interrupt.

It's clearly a bad time, but, uh, we have a problem.

Uh, Ty ran off. He's-he's gone.

Hell yeah, man.

Well, you guys were a disaster.

Where's Mason?

Be nice.

You hurt their feelings.

I handed this to you on a silver platter.

You had to handle a cripple and her stooge.

How'd you screw that up?

Things happen, Agent Peterson.

Welcome to the life of crime.

Where are my plates?

I should have tossed them in the ocean.

You came to me, my friend.

Now, you can walk with five mil or...

The plates are in my trunk.

Great.

You're gonna love Whistler.

Okay, that shouldn't be.

It was... I swear, it was right there.

I put it there myself.

There.

Thank God.

How'd you find me?

We tracked your car.

What happened?

Your little delinquent stowed away.

Yeah, we saw it on the surveillance video.

- And we kept calling you. - He took my phone.

Where did he go?

Well, you tell me. Look, I heard a rattle,

I got out, popped the trunk...

the kid's pointing my shotgun right at me.

To... He took my gun, my phone...

and the plates.

Hmm.

Wow. Well...

kid certainly doesn't have a future in,

uh, carjacking... I mean,

he... left the vehicle.

Listen, you found him once, you know where he stays.

- Take me there. - Not yet.

But listen, he could be halfway to...

He does that sometimes.

Mid-sentence, too.

Very rude.

So the kid got the plates,

your gun, and your phone.

You're lucky you still got your pants on.

Do people find you funny?

Young people.

Speaking of which, I need to call my son.

Boy tells us that he's dropping out of college.

Hasn't been to class in weeks.

You think you know someone.

Whoops.

I must have dialed the wrong number.

You little punk!

Five million dollars?

You're a government employee.

You don't understand.

I put my IRA in a real estate deal,

I lost it all. Uh...

but I don't suppose you'd consider

going 50/50 on that five mil?

Hey, watch it!

Hey!

Ty?

You okay?

Yeah.

All right, come on, let's get out of here.

You lied to me, man.

Hey, Ty! Hey, hey. Look, man,

you can't keep running.

You lied to me, man.

The people at the station said you had a family,

a kid, and a dog.

Why'd you say you didn't?

'Cause they're not really mine.

You know? It's a, um...

it's more like a borrowed family.

You're lying, man. Just like everybody else.

All right, you want the truth? Okay, um...

I had a mom.

She passed away when I was a kid.

Uh, my dad beat the hell out of me.

And I did have a wife.

And a kid.

But they passed away.

And that's it.

But I keep trying.

But right now I got nothing, man.

And that's the truth.

- Hey, no, no, come this way, come on. - What?

You want me to run toward the train?

Let's go! Come with me now, Ty.

You're crazy, man... it's a train coming!

Look, man, you got to trust somebody at some point, right?

Come on, come on.

So, what... I go with the Nuñes family?

What, Nuñes snore?

Like a damn city bus.

Well, it's better than living in one.

What if this doesn't work out?

Here's the big secret no one tells you.

Family's overrated.

Yeah. Friends are much better.

You get to pick 'em.

And if you're lucky,

they become your family.

Don't steal any more wallets.

What is that look?

Nuñes' family?

I heard this was your idea.

What, thi-this...

- my idea? - Yeah.

Oh, yeah, sure. That-that sounds like me, Doc.

This is it.

Our one last chance to course-correct

every parenting blunder we've made.

I know.

I made some bullet points.

- Okay. - Okay, so...

we're going to be... supportive.

But not too supportive.

Right, that's exactly what I said... "not too supportive."

- Uh-huh. - Two, we're gonna be tough, but not too tough.

That's pretty much like the first one.

- You think? - Mm-hmm.

- But we can say it twice, it's good. - Okay, yeah.

So RJ can live at home,

but he's gonna have to have a plan.

- Right. - All right. He can get a part-time job.

Take some courses at a local college. Uh, - Mm-hmm.

he can do his own laundry

and babysit Harper at least once a week.

- I like that last one. That's very good. - I threw that in for you. Mm-hmm.

Okay.

Come on.

Let's, uh, go do our worst.

Let's go... All right.

- Let's breathe, though. - And you know what?

- It's gonna be all right. - Okay.

What the hell

is wrong with you?

I'm sorry, uh,

I-I was working up the nerve to talk to you.

Um, I-I know this whole college thing

took you by surprise,

and I'm-I'm sorry.

I-I just... I got overwhelmed.

Well, we have, uh,

- some bullet points we want... - Roger.

- Hmm? - Uh-uh.

I-I have a plan... I thought I'd run it by you?

Okay.

What if I enrolled at a local college,

took two classes instead of four,

and lived at home, but got a part-time job

so I could pay my own expense?

- Mm-hmm. - I, um, uh...

I think I need some time to figure out my path.

So, um... think about it.

And I'll talk to the school

about getting you a refund for this semester.

I love you guys.

Wow.

Uh-huh.

Who was that?

- That... My son. - That's your son.

- That's my son. - 'Cause my son is dumb.

Honey!

We are... kick-ass...

parents.

I think we need to give seminars.

How you holding up?

Happy you're here.

You want one? I got another inside.

No, I can't stay.

Look, I, um...

...I got to get out of town for a couple days.

Where you going?

I'm sorry.

I screwed up. I should have never done that to you guys.

You brought us a puppy. It was a sweet thing to do.

You didn't know he was gonna...

You're not just talking about the...

What is it you shouldn't have done?

Pulled you into my mess.

You think you had a choice?

Your mess is where I want to be.

What is this?

Why does it feel like I'm not gonna see you

when you come back?

I can't protect you anymore, Molly.

From what?

I got to go.

I'm sorry.

Hello, Martin.

Hey, Dad.

What's that?

I told you I wanted to see you.

I got the message.

So is this what you do now?

Well...

whatever got you down here, kid.

But now that you are...

...we got a lot of catching up to do.

I didn't come all the way down here to listen to you talk.

No?

Why the hell'd you come here, then?

Common courtesy.

See, I came out here to tell you to your face...

...that when you get out of here, I'm gonna kill you.