Would you like to inspect the original subtitles? These are the user uploaded subtitles that are being translated:
1
00:00:03,400 --> 00:00:04,100
[ SHOWER RUNNING ]
2
00:00:04,100 --> 00:00:05,930
>> * POOKIE
3
00:00:05,933 --> 00:00:07,873
* POOKIE, POOKIE, POO
4
00:00:07,867 --> 00:00:09,967
>> [ LAUGHS ]
5
00:00:09,967 --> 00:00:11,797
HEY.
6
00:00:11,800 --> 00:00:14,800
UM, MR. ANDREA BOCELLI,
7
00:00:14,800 --> 00:00:15,970
BREAKFAST IS HERE.
8
00:00:15,967 --> 00:00:18,167
YOU KNOW I HATE COLD SLIME.
9
00:00:18,167 --> 00:00:19,397
>> I'LL BE THERE IN A SEC.
10
00:00:19,400 --> 00:00:20,600
>> MM-HMM.
11
00:00:20,600 --> 00:00:24,870
>> * POOKIE, POOKIE
12
00:00:24,867 --> 00:00:25,767
* POOKIE
13
00:00:25,767 --> 00:00:27,327
[ CELLPHONE RINGS ]
14
00:00:27,333 --> 00:00:28,003
>> POOKIE, THE PHONE!
15
00:00:28,000 --> 00:00:30,000
>> * YOU MAKE THE DOVES CRY
16
00:00:30,000 --> 00:00:30,970
[ RINGING CONTINUES ]
17
00:00:30,967 --> 00:00:33,567
* THAT'S 'CAUSE YOU'RE A LOVER,
18
00:00:33,567 --> 00:00:37,597
AND LOVER COULDN'T CRY, POOKIE *
19
00:00:37,600 --> 00:00:41,900
* OH, SWEET, SWEET POOKIE
20
00:00:41,900 --> 00:00:46,200
* FROM MY HAIR, FROM MY FEET
21
00:00:46,200 --> 00:00:46,870
>> OH.
22
00:00:46,867 --> 00:00:55,767
>> * I AM POOKIE
23
00:01:04,700 --> 00:01:05,630
>> OH!
24
00:01:05,633 --> 00:01:06,533
>> GUESS WHO'S HOME.
25
00:01:06,533 --> 00:01:09,703
>> UH, TIFFANY, RAMONA, SIDNEY?
26
00:01:09,700 --> 00:01:10,430
[ LAUGHS ]
27
00:01:10,433 --> 00:01:11,073
HOW WAS YOUR TRIP?
28
00:01:11,067 --> 00:01:12,667
>> WAIT. BEFORE YOU GET INTO
29
00:01:12,667 --> 00:01:13,797
THAT, I HAVE A LITTLE SURPRISE
30
00:01:13,800 --> 00:01:14,300
FOR YOU.
31
00:01:14,300 --> 00:01:15,430
I BROUGHT BACK A SOUVENIR FROM
32
00:01:15,433 --> 00:01:15,903
D.C.
33
00:01:15,900 --> 00:01:17,070
>> IS IT SIDNEY?
34
00:01:17,067 --> 00:01:18,667
[ RAGGED BREATHING ]
35
00:01:18,667 --> 00:01:20,227
>> CLOSE. NOW JUST CLOSE YOUR
36
00:01:20,233 --> 00:01:24,603
EYES AND WAIT RIGHT THERE, OKAY?
37
00:01:24,600 --> 00:01:26,070
I'M HUNGRY.
38
00:01:26,067 --> 00:01:28,227
BROTHER HUNGRY.
39
00:01:28,233 --> 00:01:30,073
>> [ LAUGHS ]
40
00:01:30,067 --> 00:01:32,497
OKAY. NOW OPEN THEM.
41
00:01:32,500 --> 00:01:34,300
>> OH! OH!
42
00:01:34,300 --> 00:01:35,270
[ Garbled ] THAT'S FREE FROM
43
00:01:35,267 --> 00:01:36,067
"106 & PARK"!
44
00:01:36,067 --> 00:01:36,767
>> YEAH.
45
00:01:36,767 --> 00:01:37,867
>> OH, MY GOD. HI.
46
00:01:37,867 --> 00:01:38,627
>> HI, DERWIN.
47
00:01:38,633 --> 00:01:39,703
NICE TO MEET YOU.
48
00:01:39,700 --> 00:01:40,530
I'M A BIG FAN.
49
00:01:40,533 --> 00:01:41,573
>> NICE TO MEET YOU, FREE.
50
00:01:41,567 --> 00:01:42,797
I'M A BIG FAN OF YOU.
51
00:01:42,800 --> 00:01:43,830
>> YEAH, DO YOU REMEMBER -- BACK
52
00:01:43,833 --> 00:01:44,673
IN COLLEGE, YOU USED TO LOVE
53
00:01:44,667 --> 00:01:45,097
HER?
54
00:01:45,100 --> 00:01:46,100
YOU WOULDN'T TAKE CLASSES
55
00:01:46,100 --> 00:01:47,070
BETWEEN 3:00 AND 4:00.
56
00:01:47,067 --> 00:01:49,267
>> MELANIE, "106 & PARK" WAS ON
57
00:01:49,267 --> 00:01:50,697
6:00 TO 7:30.
58
00:01:50,700 --> 00:01:51,670
>> DO YOU WANT SOME OF MY
59
00:01:51,667 --> 00:01:52,127
SANDWICH?
60
00:01:52,133 --> 00:01:53,203
LIKE, IT'S TURKEY AND CHEESE
61
00:01:53,200 --> 00:01:54,230
WITH SOME LETTUCE ON THERE.
62
00:01:54,233 --> 00:01:55,303
>> NO, JUST SOME WATER.
63
00:01:55,300 --> 00:01:56,070
THANK YOU.
64
00:01:56,067 --> 00:01:56,967
>> OKAY.
65
00:01:56,967 --> 00:01:57,967
[ LAUGHS ]
66
00:01:57,967 --> 00:01:59,367
THAT'S FREE RIGHT THERE.
67
00:01:59,367 --> 00:02:00,927
THAT'S FREE. THAT'S WHAT'S UP.
68
00:02:00,933 --> 00:02:01,803
>> RIGHT?
69
00:02:01,800 --> 00:02:03,530
>> BUT YOU AIN'T SLICK, NOT EVEN
70
00:02:03,533 --> 00:02:06,203
A LITTLE BIT.
71
00:02:06,200 --> 00:02:07,500
I KNOW WHAT YOU'RE TRYING TO DO.
72
00:02:07,500 --> 00:02:08,770
YOU'RE TRYING TO BUTTER ME UP BY
73
00:02:08,767 --> 00:02:10,067
BRINGING FREE HERE TO GET ME TO
74
00:02:10,067 --> 00:02:10,527
GO TO D.C.
75
00:02:10,532 --> 00:02:11,602
>> [ SIGHS ] OKAY.
76
00:02:11,600 --> 00:02:12,170
>> YEAH.
77
00:02:12,167 --> 00:02:13,067
>> GUILTY.
78
00:02:13,067 --> 00:02:15,267
BUT NONE OF THIS MATTERS, OKAY?
79
00:02:15,267 --> 00:02:17,427
I GOT A CALL FROM JOHNS HOPKINS,
80
00:02:17,433 --> 00:02:18,603
AND THE INTERVIEW WENT GREAT.
81
00:02:18,600 --> 00:02:19,770
SO MY DAD -- HE PULLED A FEW
82
00:02:19,767 --> 00:02:20,927
STRINGS, AND THERE IS EVEN A
83
00:02:20,933 --> 00:02:22,473
RESEARCH POSITION AVAILABLE.
84
00:02:22,467 --> 00:02:25,927
AND IN THE EVENT THAT THIS WHOLE
85
00:02:25,933 --> 00:02:28,173
PLAN WORKED, I TOOK THE LIBERTY
86
00:02:28,167 --> 00:02:29,497
OF PRINTING OUT SOME STATS OF
87
00:02:29,500 --> 00:02:30,970
WASHINGTON'S FOOTBALL TEAM,
88
00:02:30,967 --> 00:02:32,567
WHICH, BY THE WAY, WOULD BE A
89
00:02:32,567 --> 00:02:33,727
GREAT FIT FOR YOU.
90
00:02:33,733 --> 00:02:34,633
>> OH, YEAH? SAYS WHO?
91
00:02:34,633 --> 00:02:35,573
>> SAYS FREE.
92
00:02:35,567 --> 00:02:36,827
TELL HIM, FREE.
93
00:02:36,867 --> 00:02:38,067
>> THE WASHINGTON FOOTBALL TEAM
94
00:02:38,067 --> 00:02:38,867
IS GREAT.
95
00:02:38,867 --> 00:02:41,067
WHERE'S MY WATER?
96
00:02:41,067 --> 00:02:41,767
>> COMING.
97
00:02:41,767 --> 00:02:43,967
THANK YOU, FREE.
98
00:02:46,833 --> 00:02:47,333
>> OH, DAMN, BABE.
99
00:02:48,067 --> 00:02:49,527
YOU ATE BREAKFAST WITHOUT ME?
100
00:02:49,533 --> 00:02:51,303
>> I TOLD YOU I DON'T EAT COLD
101
00:02:51,300 --> 00:02:53,500
PIG, PIG.
102
00:02:53,500 --> 00:02:56,170
>> EXCUSE ME?
103
00:02:56,167 --> 00:02:57,667
>> WHO THE HELL IS SHEIDA?
104
00:02:57,667 --> 00:02:58,927
>> [ Laughing ] OKAY, YOU BEEN
105
00:02:58,933 --> 00:03:00,403
SNOOPING THROUGH MY PHONE, HUH?
106
00:03:00,400 --> 00:03:02,770
>> NO, ACTUALLY, YOUR PHONE FELL
107
00:03:02,767 --> 00:03:04,827
ON THE FLOOR AFTER MY ELBOW JUST
108
00:03:04,833 --> 00:03:06,833
ACCIDENTALLY KNOCKED INTO IT.
109
00:03:06,833 --> 00:03:08,203
AND WHEN I WENT TO PICK IT UP, I
110
00:03:08,200 --> 00:03:09,770
JUST ACCIDENTALLY HAPPENED TO
111
00:03:09,767 --> 00:03:11,167
SEE THAT THERE WERE SIX TEXT
112
00:03:11,167 --> 00:03:12,667
MESSAGES FROM SOME [BLEEP] NAMED
113
00:03:12,667 --> 00:03:13,097
SHEIDA.
114
00:03:13,100 --> 00:03:14,700
>> AND I GUESS YOUR FINGERS JUST
115
00:03:14,700 --> 00:03:16,770
ACCIDENTALLY UNLOCKED THE PHONE.
116
00:03:16,767 --> 00:03:17,697
>> THAT'S BESIDE THE POINT,
117
00:03:17,700 --> 00:03:18,070
OKAY?
118
00:03:18,067 --> 00:03:19,067
THE POINT IS, WHO THE HELL IS
119
00:03:19,067 --> 00:03:19,567
SHEIDA?
120
00:03:19,567 --> 00:03:22,267
>> RESHEIDA IS A LOVELY YOUNG
121
00:03:22,267 --> 00:03:23,867
LADY THAT I USED TO CASUALLY
122
00:03:23,867 --> 00:03:25,197
ENTERTAIN BEFORE YOU AND I
123
00:03:25,200 --> 00:03:26,070
BECAME AN ITEM.
124
00:03:26,067 --> 00:03:27,827
>> OKAY. AND WHY DIDN'T I KNOW
125
00:03:27,833 --> 00:03:29,773
ANYTHING ABOUT THIS CASUAL FORM
126
00:03:29,767 --> 00:03:30,627
OF ENTERTAINMENT?
127
00:03:30,633 --> 00:03:32,073
>> BECAUSE SHE IS A NONFACTOR.
128
00:03:32,067 --> 00:03:33,097
I DIDN'T WANT TO BE IN A
129
00:03:33,100 --> 00:03:33,900
RELATIONSHIP.
130
00:03:33,900 --> 00:03:35,070
AND IT'S REALLY NONE OF YOUR
131
00:03:35,067 --> 00:03:35,427
CONCERN.
132
00:03:35,433 --> 00:03:36,433
>> OKAY, WELL, APPARENTLY
133
00:03:36,433 --> 00:03:37,103
SHE AIN'T SUCH A
134
00:03:37,100 --> 00:03:38,270
NON-MOTHER FREAKING-FACTOR IF
135
00:03:38,267 --> 00:03:39,327
THE TRICK IS STILL TEXTING,
136
00:03:39,333 --> 00:03:45,373
TALKING ABOUT SHE LOVE YOU.
137
00:03:45,367 --> 00:03:47,197
HELLO?
138
00:03:47,200 --> 00:03:48,630
>> BABY, DON'T WORRY ABOUT IT,
139
00:03:48,633 --> 00:03:49,133
ALL RIGHT?
140
00:03:49,133 --> 00:03:49,703
LEAVE IT ALONE.
141
00:03:49,700 --> 00:03:50,600
I'LL HANDLE IT, OKAY?
142
00:03:50,600 --> 00:03:51,530
>> AND WHAT IF I SAY, "NO, I
143
00:03:51,533 --> 00:03:52,533
DON'T WANT TO LEAVE IT ALONE"?
144
00:03:52,533 --> 00:03:53,703
THEN WHAT?
145
00:03:53,700 --> 00:03:55,270
[ SILVERWARE CLINKS ]
146
00:03:55,267 --> 00:03:56,527
>> THEN I AM GONNA HAVE TO
147
00:03:56,533 --> 00:03:58,503
REMIND YOU HOW I USED TO MAKE
148
00:03:58,500 --> 00:03:59,870
PEOPLE DISAPPEAR FOR A LIVING.
149
00:03:59,867 --> 00:04:00,467
>> [ LAUGHS ]
150
00:04:00,467 --> 00:04:01,067
>> [ LAUGHS ]
151
00:04:01,067 --> 00:04:01,727
>> OH, REALLY?
152
00:04:01,733 --> 00:04:02,573
>> THAT'S RIGHT.
153
00:04:02,567 --> 00:04:03,097
>> OKAY.
154
00:04:03,100 --> 00:04:04,200
OH, SO, OHH, I'M SCARED.
155
00:04:04,200 --> 00:04:05,270
OKAY, THAT'S A THREAT?
156
00:04:05,267 --> 00:04:06,797
OKAY, 'CAUSE YOU KNOW THREATS
157
00:04:06,800 --> 00:04:08,070
ARE RESERVED FOR THE BEDROOM.
158
00:04:08,067 --> 00:04:08,597
>> MM-HMM.
159
00:04:08,600 --> 00:04:09,800
>> AND SINCE WE AIN'T HAD SEX
160
00:04:09,800 --> 00:04:10,930
YET, YOU NEED TO SAVE THAT
161
00:04:10,933 --> 00:04:12,133
MURDER TALK FOR SOMEONE WHO
162
00:04:12,133 --> 00:04:13,433
ACTUALLY GIVES A DAMN, LIKE
163
00:04:13,433 --> 00:04:14,973
RESHEIDA.
164
00:04:14,967 --> 00:04:16,427
[ CLATTERS ]
165
00:04:18,067 --> 00:04:18,927
>> IT'S A FACT.
166
00:04:18,933 --> 00:04:19,503
>> NO, IT --
167
00:04:19,500 --> 00:04:20,530
>> NO, THAT'S A REAL THING.
168
00:04:20,533 --> 00:04:21,473
>> IT IS A REAL THING.
169
00:04:21,466 --> 00:04:22,696
>> THAT'S GONNA HAPPEN WHEN YOU
170
00:04:22,700 --> 00:04:23,530
PUT IT IN YOUR FACE.
171
00:04:23,533 --> 00:04:24,073
HEY, HEY!
172
00:04:24,067 --> 00:04:24,867
MELANIE!
173
00:04:24,867 --> 00:04:25,467
>> YES?
174
00:04:25,467 --> 00:04:27,627
>> HOW ARE YOU, DOLL FACE? MWAH!
175
00:04:27,633 --> 00:04:28,973
WHAT AM I DOING -- WAKING YOU UP
176
00:04:28,967 --> 00:04:30,227
FROM A LITTLE AFTERNOON BEAUTY
177
00:04:30,233 --> 00:04:30,833
REST, HUH?
178
00:04:30,833 --> 00:04:31,503
>> OH, GOD.
179
00:04:31,500 --> 00:04:32,730
I MUST STILL BE JET-LAGGED FROM
180
00:04:32,733 --> 00:04:33,433
D.C.
181
00:04:33,433 --> 00:04:35,303
>> OH, GOD, WHAT I WOULDN'T GIVE
182
00:04:35,300 --> 00:04:37,500
TO LAY UP WITH NO JOB, KNOWING
183
00:04:37,500 --> 00:04:38,970
A RICH, STRAPPING ATHLETE WAS
184
00:04:38,967 --> 00:04:39,897
TAKING CARE OF MY EVERY NEED,
185
00:04:39,900 --> 00:04:40,430
HUH?
186
00:04:40,433 --> 00:04:42,073
MNH! WHERE WAS I WHEN GOD WAS
187
00:04:42,067 --> 00:04:43,197
PASSING OUT VAGINAS, HUH?
188
00:04:43,200 --> 00:04:44,570
WHOO! SO, WHAT WAS SO PRESSING
189
00:04:44,567 --> 00:04:46,067
THAT THE TWO OF YOU HAD TO DRAG
190
00:04:46,067 --> 00:04:47,197
ME OUT OF MY -- AGAH! --
191
00:04:47,200 --> 00:04:48,230
KRAV MAGA LESSON?
192
00:04:48,233 --> 00:04:48,803
>> OH.
193
00:04:48,800 --> 00:04:49,430
>> HERE. WATCH THIS.
194
00:04:49,433 --> 00:04:50,173
DERWIN, PUT YOUR HAND RIGHT ON
195
00:04:50,167 --> 00:04:50,627
MY SHOULDER.
196
00:04:50,633 --> 00:04:51,373
I'M GONNA SHOW YOU WHAT'S UP.
197
00:04:51,367 --> 00:04:52,127
PUT YOUR HAND ON MY SHOULDER AND
198
00:04:52,133 --> 00:04:52,903
WATCH -- LET ME SHOW YOU WHAT I
199
00:04:52,900 --> 00:04:53,400
LEARNED.
200
00:04:53,400 --> 00:04:53,900
COME ON.
201
00:04:53,900 --> 00:04:54,830
NOW, JUST BE READY.
202
00:04:54,833 --> 00:04:55,673
[ BREATHES DEEPLY ]
203
00:04:55,667 --> 00:04:57,697
BE READY.
204
00:04:57,700 --> 00:04:59,070
KRAV MAGA!
205
00:04:59,067 --> 00:05:00,327
CLOSER.
206
00:05:00,333 --> 00:05:00,933
KRAV MAGA!
207
00:05:00,933 --> 00:05:02,103
OHH! AAH!
208
00:05:02,100 --> 00:05:02,830
[ COUGHS ]
209
00:05:02,833 --> 00:05:03,433
>> YOU ALL RIGHT?
210
00:05:03,433 --> 00:05:04,133
>> YEAH, NO, I'M GOOD.
211
00:05:04,133 --> 00:05:05,133
NO, WE WERE JUST GETTING TO THAT
212
00:05:05,133 --> 00:05:05,933
PART WHEN I -- WHEN YOU GUYS
213
00:05:05,933 --> 00:05:06,333
CALLED.
214
00:05:06,333 --> 00:05:07,073
THAT WAS REALLY GOOD.
215
00:05:07,067 --> 00:05:08,767
>> NO, I JUST -- IT'S A REFLEX.
216
00:05:08,767 --> 00:05:09,527
>> THAT'S GOOD.
217
00:05:09,533 --> 00:05:10,303
>> LOOK, LOOK, LOOK.
218
00:05:10,300 --> 00:05:11,230
THE REASON WHY WE CALLED YOU
219
00:05:11,233 --> 00:05:12,733
OVER HERE, MAN...
220
00:05:12,733 --> 00:05:13,873
[ SIGHS ]
221
00:05:13,867 --> 00:05:15,427
...IS BECAUSE WE HAVE SOME BAD
222
00:05:15,433 --> 00:05:16,973
NEWS.
223
00:05:16,967 --> 00:05:17,827
I THINK WE'RE DONE.
224
00:05:17,833 --> 00:05:18,673
>> I KNEW IT. YES!
225
00:05:18,667 --> 00:05:19,897
I WAS TELLING MY ASSISTANT ON
226
00:05:19,900 --> 00:05:20,930
THE WAY OVER -- "THEY'RE DONE.
227
00:05:20,933 --> 00:05:21,433
THEY'RE DONE."
228
00:05:21,433 --> 00:05:22,203
I MEAN, LET'S BE HONEST -- THE
229
00:05:22,200 --> 00:05:23,270
ODDS WERE STACKED AGAINST YOU
230
00:05:23,267 --> 00:05:23,967
GUYS FROM THE BEGINNING --
231
00:05:23,967 --> 00:05:24,467
AM I RIGHT?
232
00:05:24,467 --> 00:05:25,427
>> WHAT THE HELL ARE YOU TALKING
233
00:05:25,433 --> 00:05:25,903
ABOUT, MAN?
234
00:05:25,900 --> 00:05:26,770
NO, WE'RE TALKING ABOUT THE
235
00:05:26,767 --> 00:05:28,367
SABERS.
236
00:05:28,367 --> 00:05:29,297
>> SO, WAIT A MINUTE.
237
00:05:29,300 --> 00:05:30,300
YOU'RE NOT GETTING DIVORCED?
238
00:05:30,300 --> 00:05:31,230
>> NO.
239
00:05:31,233 --> 00:05:31,833
>> [ SIGHS ]
240
00:05:31,833 --> 00:05:32,403
>> I KNEW IT!
241
00:05:32,400 --> 00:05:33,600
I KNEW YOU GUYS WERE GONNA MAKE
242
00:05:33,600 --> 00:05:34,630
IT 'CAUSE YOU'RE A STRONG,
243
00:05:34,633 --> 00:05:35,633
BEAUTIFUL BLACK COUPLE --
244
00:05:35,633 --> 00:05:36,333
>> WATCH YOURSELF.
245
00:05:36,333 --> 00:05:36,903
>> I'M BLACK.
246
00:05:36,900 --> 00:05:38,430
>> OKAY, LISTEN, WE ALL KNOW
247
00:05:38,433 --> 00:05:39,673
THAT, THIS SEASON, I WAS
248
00:05:39,667 --> 00:05:40,727
UNDERPAID AND UNDERUTILIZED.
249
00:05:40,733 --> 00:05:41,673
>> AND NOT TO MENTION
250
00:05:41,667 --> 00:05:42,327
UNDERAPPRECIATED.
251
00:05:42,333 --> 00:05:43,133
>> YEAH, AND THAT WHOLE
252
00:05:43,133 --> 00:05:44,473
KWAN KIRKLAND THING, MAN, REALLY
253
00:05:44,467 --> 00:05:45,667
LEFT A BAD TASTE IN MY MOUTH.
254
00:05:45,667 --> 00:05:46,127
>> MM-HMM.
255
00:05:46,133 --> 00:05:47,233
>> SO, WITH THAT BEING SAID, ME
256
00:05:47,233 --> 00:05:48,273
AND MEL WAS THINKING, WITH MY
257
00:05:48,267 --> 00:05:49,397
CONTRACT RUNNING OUT, THAT MAYBE
258
00:05:49,400 --> 00:05:50,330
WE COULD EXPLORE SOME OTHER
259
00:05:50,333 --> 00:05:50,773
OPTIONS.
260
00:05:50,767 --> 00:05:51,867
>> AND BY "OTHER OPTIONS," WE
261
00:05:51,867 --> 00:05:52,367
MEAN "D.C."
262
00:05:52,367 --> 00:05:52,867
>> YEAH.
263
00:05:52,867 --> 00:05:54,097
>> IT'S SETTLED -- THE SABERS
264
00:05:54,100 --> 00:05:55,430
CAN GO TO HELL, 'CAUSE I'LL BE
265
00:05:55,433 --> 00:05:56,673
DAMNED IF MY CLIENT FEELS
266
00:05:56,667 --> 00:05:58,567
UNAPPRECIATED OR UNDERPAID.
267
00:05:58,567 --> 00:05:59,367
>> THAT'S WHAT'S UP, MAN.
268
00:05:59,367 --> 00:06:00,097
>> THAT'S WHAT'S UP.
269
00:06:00,100 --> 00:06:00,730
>> THANKS, IRV.
270
00:06:00,733 --> 00:06:01,633
>> NO SWEAT. OF COURSE.
271
00:06:01,633 --> 00:06:03,073
AND BY THE WAY, IF YOU GUYS DO
272
00:06:03,067 --> 00:06:04,367
DECIDE TO RECONSIDER THE WHOLE
273
00:06:04,367 --> 00:06:05,627
DIVORCE THING, MY LAWYER HAS
274
00:06:05,633 --> 00:06:06,733
SOME GREAT RATES AND HE CAN
275
00:06:06,733 --> 00:06:07,833
PROBABLY THROW IN A FEW FREE
276
00:06:07,833 --> 00:06:09,073
BROADWAY TICKETS AS PART OF THE
277
00:06:09,067 --> 00:06:10,067
WHOLE INCENTIVE PACKAGE.
278
00:06:10,067 --> 00:06:10,497
>> BYE, IRV.
279
00:06:10,500 --> 00:06:11,870
>> ALL RIGHT, GUYS, I LOVE YOU.
280
00:06:12,833 --> 00:06:14,403
>> AND FROM HERE, WE WILL COME
281
00:06:14,400 --> 00:06:16,130
UP AND INTO OUR "DOWNWARD-FACING
282
00:06:16,133 --> 00:06:16,903
DOG" POSITION.
283
00:06:16,900 --> 00:06:17,970
>> [ BREATHES SHARPLY ]
284
00:06:17,967 --> 00:06:19,367
>> TAKE A DOG TO DO A
285
00:06:19,367 --> 00:06:20,627
"DOWNWARD-DOG" POSITION.
286
00:06:20,633 --> 00:06:21,973
>> OH, YOU ARE NOT GONNA START
287
00:06:21,967 --> 00:06:22,527
THIS RIGHT NOW.
288
00:06:22,533 --> 00:06:22,933
>> MNH.
289
00:06:22,933 --> 00:06:23,803
>> NOT WHILE I'M TRYING TO GET
290
00:06:23,800 --> 00:06:24,530
MY YOGA IN.
291
00:06:24,533 --> 00:06:26,203
>> OKAY. LOOK, DON'T START NO
292
00:06:26,200 --> 00:06:27,500
ISH, WON'T BE NO ISH.
293
00:06:27,500 --> 00:06:29,700
>> [ GROANS ]
294
00:06:29,700 --> 00:06:31,070
NAMASTE.
295
00:06:31,067 --> 00:06:33,367
>> YOU NAMASTE.
296
00:06:33,367 --> 00:06:34,367
>> YOU KNOW, IF YOU DON'T TAKE
297
00:06:34,367 --> 00:06:35,327
THIS SERIOUS, I'M GONNA JUST
298
00:06:35,333 --> 00:06:36,233
TAKE IT IN THE BEDROOM AND
299
00:06:36,233 --> 00:06:36,673
PRACTICE.
300
00:06:36,667 --> 00:06:39,397
>> BYE.
301
00:06:39,400 --> 00:06:42,070
I DON'T NEED NO DVD TO STRETCH.
302
00:06:42,067 --> 00:06:43,067
[ TELEVISION TURNS OFF ]
303
00:06:43,067 --> 00:06:45,797
I CAN YOGA BY MY DAMN SELF.
304
00:06:45,800 --> 00:06:47,070
[ DOOR CLOSES ]
305
00:06:47,067 --> 00:06:49,067
[ CELLPHONE VIBRATING ]
306
00:07:00,933 --> 00:07:02,473
HELLO.
307
00:07:02,467 --> 00:07:03,867
LOOK, DON'T YOU WORRY ABOUT WHO
308
00:07:03,867 --> 00:07:04,227
THIS IS.
309
00:07:04,233 --> 00:07:06,103
WHO THE HELL ARE YOU?
310
00:07:06,100 --> 00:07:07,270
LOOK, WHY THE HELL YOU KEEP
311
00:07:07,267 --> 00:07:09,297
CALLING MY MAN?
312
00:07:09,300 --> 00:07:10,700
SAY WHAT?
313
00:07:10,700 --> 00:07:12,070
Y'ALL LIVE TOGETHER?
314
00:07:12,067 --> 00:07:13,627
YEAH, BUT HE IN MY BEDROOM RIGHT
315
00:07:13,633 --> 00:07:15,203
NOW DOWNWARD-DOGGING,
316
00:07:15,200 --> 00:07:16,470
UPWARD-DOGGING, AND
317
00:07:16,467 --> 00:07:17,727
SIDE-DOGGING, OKAY?
318
00:07:17,733 --> 00:07:19,073
SO I GUESS HE ALREADY DECIDED ON
319
00:07:19,067 --> 00:07:20,867
WHO HE WANT TO BE WITH.
320
00:07:20,867 --> 00:07:23,167
WELL, FINE. FINE.
321
00:07:23,167 --> 00:07:24,767
LOOK, BRING YOUR LITTLE SELF ON
322
00:07:24,767 --> 00:07:26,667
DOWN HERE, OKAY, AND HE CAN DUMP
323
00:07:26,667 --> 00:07:27,727
YOUR TRIFLING...IN PERSON.
324
00:07:27,733 --> 00:07:29,233
I'M GONNA GIVE YOU MY E-MAIL,
325
00:07:29,233 --> 00:07:30,903
PHONE NUMBER, ADDRESS, AND SKYPE
326
00:07:30,900 --> 00:07:32,500
INFORMATION -- HOW ABOUT THAT?
327
00:07:32,500 --> 00:07:33,570
[ DOORBELL RINGS ]
328
00:07:33,567 --> 00:07:34,927
>> ROSIE, CAN YOU DO ME A FAVOR?
329
00:07:34,933 --> 00:07:35,773
CAN YOU GET THAT?
330
00:07:35,767 --> 00:07:36,827
>> ON THE COUNTDOWN, AND
331
00:07:36,833 --> 00:07:37,403
LISTEN...
332
00:07:37,400 --> 00:07:38,070
>> THANK YOU.
333
00:07:38,067 --> 00:07:39,427
>> TERRENCE, ROCSI!
334
00:07:39,433 --> 00:07:41,103
GUYS, CAN YOU JUST LET ONE VIDEO
335
00:07:41,100 --> 00:07:42,230
PLAY IN ITS ENTIRETY?
336
00:07:42,233 --> 00:07:43,873
DANG.
337
00:07:43,867 --> 00:07:45,497
>> OH, YO, MAID LADY, TAKE THIS
338
00:07:45,500 --> 00:07:46,070
CHAMPAGNE.
339
00:07:46,067 --> 00:07:46,767
GIVE ME TWO GLASSES.
340
00:07:46,767 --> 00:07:47,397
THAT'S BE GREAT.
341
00:07:47,400 --> 00:07:47,870
DERWIN!
342
00:07:47,867 --> 00:07:48,397
>> WHAT'S UP?
343
00:07:48,400 --> 00:07:49,070
>> WHAT'S UP, BUDDY?
344
00:07:49,067 --> 00:07:49,827
ALL RIGHT, LISTEN, TAKE YOUR
345
00:07:49,833 --> 00:07:50,203
ARM.
346
00:07:50,200 --> 00:07:50,900
POP ME IN A CHOKE HOLD.
347
00:07:50,900 --> 00:07:51,330
>> HUH?
348
00:07:51,333 --> 00:07:52,073
>> NO, SERIOUSLY, COME ON.
349
00:07:52,067 --> 00:07:52,927
JUST PUT ME IN A LITTLE -- PUT
350
00:07:52,933 --> 00:07:53,673
ME IN A LITTLE CHOKE HOLD.
351
00:07:53,667 --> 00:07:54,267
NOW JUST BE READY.
352
00:07:54,267 --> 00:07:54,767
>> LET'S GO.
353
00:07:54,767 --> 00:07:55,327
>> YOU READY?!
354
00:07:55,333 --> 00:07:55,973
>> YEAH.
355
00:07:55,967 --> 00:07:56,967
>> [ BREATHING SHARPLY ]
356
00:07:56,967 --> 00:07:59,427
KRAV MAGA!
357
00:07:59,433 --> 00:08:01,133
AAH!
358
00:08:01,133 --> 00:08:01,873
AAH!
359
00:08:01,867 --> 00:08:03,197
KRAV MAGA!
360
00:08:03,200 --> 00:08:04,400
[ GRUNTING ]
361
00:08:04,400 --> 00:08:05,500
>> IS THIS IT?
362
00:08:05,500 --> 00:08:06,100
>> UNCLE.
363
00:08:06,100 --> 00:08:07,100
>> OH, DAMN!
364
00:08:07,100 --> 00:08:09,530
>> [ COUGHING ]
365
00:08:09,533 --> 00:08:10,173
>> YOU ALL RIGHT?
366
00:08:10,167 --> 00:08:12,527
>> YEAH.
367
00:08:12,533 --> 00:08:13,303
ARE YOU OKAY?
368
00:08:13,300 --> 00:08:14,400
>> I'M -- I'M FINE.
369
00:08:14,400 --> 00:08:15,670
>> OH, GOOD. I'M OKAY.
370
00:08:15,667 --> 00:08:16,867
YOU'VE OBVIOUSLY STUDIED THE
371
00:08:16,867 --> 00:08:17,827
WAYS OF KRAV MAGA.
372
00:08:17,833 --> 00:08:18,903
>> NO, I HAVEN'T, BUT IF THAT'S
373
00:08:18,900 --> 00:08:19,970
WHAT YOU LEARNED IN YOUR CLASS,
374
00:08:19,967 --> 00:08:20,967
MAN, YOU NEED TO GET YOUR MONEY
375
00:08:20,967 --> 00:08:21,327
BACK.
376
00:08:21,333 --> 00:08:21,803
>> NO, NO.
377
00:08:21,800 --> 00:08:23,500
I REP...THE ISRAELI WRESTLER.
378
00:08:23,500 --> 00:08:24,600
HE HAD THAT WHOLE DOPING SCANDAL
379
00:08:24,600 --> 00:08:25,470
IN THE 2000 OLYMPICS.
380
00:08:25,467 --> 00:08:25,867
>> MM.
381
00:08:25,867 --> 00:08:27,597
>> HIS FATHER WAS PART OF THAT
382
00:08:27,600 --> 00:08:28,470
MUNICH THING.
383
00:08:28,467 --> 00:08:30,297
HIS KID TEACHES ME FOR FREE.
384
00:08:30,300 --> 00:08:31,370
>> WHAT'S UP WITH THE CHAMPAGNE,
385
00:08:31,367 --> 00:08:31,767
MAN?
386
00:08:31,767 --> 00:08:32,667
WE CELEBRATING SOMETHING?
387
00:08:32,667 --> 00:08:33,767
>> WELL, I, IN FACT, AM
388
00:08:33,767 --> 00:08:35,167
CELEBRATING MY NEWLY FINALIZED
389
00:08:35,167 --> 00:08:36,467
DIVORCE FROM MY OVER-THE-HILL
390
00:08:36,467 --> 00:08:37,697
MAIL-ORDER BRIDE SVETLANA.
391
00:08:37,700 --> 00:08:38,230
>> OH.
392
00:08:38,232 --> 00:08:40,232
>> AND YOU, MY FRIEND, ARE
393
00:08:40,232 --> 00:08:41,972
CELEBRATING YOUR NEW CONTRACT
394
00:08:41,967 --> 00:08:43,497
FOR...
395
00:08:43,500 --> 00:08:44,800
$50 MILLION!
396
00:08:44,800 --> 00:08:46,730
HOLLA!
397
00:08:46,733 --> 00:08:47,733
>> ARE YOU SERIOUS --
398
00:08:47,733 --> 00:08:48,473
$50 MILLION, IRV?!
399
00:08:48,467 --> 00:08:49,597
>> AS SERIOUS AS THE JUDGE WHO
400
00:08:49,600 --> 00:08:50,800
ORDERED ME TO GIVE HALF MY MONEY
401
00:08:50,800 --> 00:08:51,700
TO THE UKRAINIAN SKANK.
402
00:08:51,700 --> 00:08:52,070
>> WHOO!
403
00:08:52,067 --> 00:08:52,867
>> WHOO!
404
00:08:52,867 --> 00:08:53,867
>> D.C. WASN'T PLAYING.
405
00:08:53,867 --> 00:08:55,127
THAT'S WHAT I'M TALKING ABOUT!
406
00:08:55,133 --> 00:08:55,573
>> NO, NO.
407
00:08:55,567 --> 00:08:56,397
D.C. IS HISTORY, BUDDY.
408
00:08:56,400 --> 00:08:57,330
THIS OFFER'S FROM THE SABERS.
409
00:08:57,333 --> 00:08:57,873
>> SAY WHAT?
410
00:08:57,867 --> 00:08:59,067
>> THAT'S RIGHT -- SABERS FOR
411
00:08:59,067 --> 00:09:00,427
LIFE, BABY!
412
00:09:00,433 --> 00:09:01,373
>> NO, IRV. I DON'T UNDERSTAND.
413
00:09:01,367 --> 00:09:02,297
I THOUGHT WE TOLD YOU THAT WE
414
00:09:02,300 --> 00:09:03,070
WERE INTERESTED IN D.C.
415
00:09:03,067 --> 00:09:04,097
>> NO, I KNOW. I KNOW.
416
00:09:04,100 --> 00:09:05,500
BUT ONCE THE SABERS FOUND OUT
417
00:09:05,500 --> 00:09:06,930
THAT D.C. WAS INTERESTED, THEY
418
00:09:06,933 --> 00:09:08,233
CALLED ME ON THE PHONE AND TOLD
419
00:09:08,233 --> 00:09:09,603
ME HOW BADLY THEY WANTED TO STEP
420
00:09:09,600 --> 00:09:10,670
UP TO THE PLATE AND SHOW
421
00:09:10,667 --> 00:09:12,667
DERWIN DAVIS THE APPRECIATION HE
422
00:09:12,667 --> 00:09:13,797
DESERVES, HUH?
423
00:09:13,800 --> 00:09:16,070
OH! HUH? COME ON.
424
00:09:16,067 --> 00:09:16,967
>> NO, IRV, NO.
425
00:09:16,967 --> 00:09:17,797
THAT'S A GREAT OFFER.
426
00:09:17,800 --> 00:09:18,900
DON'T GET IT TWISTED, ALL RIGHT?
427
00:09:18,900 --> 00:09:20,070
BUT, LIKE, YO, ME AND MELANIE
428
00:09:20,067 --> 00:09:21,097
WERE SERIOUS ABOUT WANTING TO
429
00:09:21,100 --> 00:09:21,670
EXPLORE D.C.
430
00:09:21,667 --> 00:09:22,397
>> YEAH, NO, NO, NO.
431
00:09:22,400 --> 00:09:23,470
D.C. IS HISTORY, BUDDY, OKAY?
432
00:09:23,467 --> 00:09:24,267
THAT AIN'T HAPPENING.
433
00:09:24,267 --> 00:09:25,297
I TOLD THEM TO GO SCREW
434
00:09:25,300 --> 00:09:26,530
THEMSELVES AFTER THEY
435
00:09:26,533 --> 00:09:28,073
DISRESPECTED YOU WITH A MEASLY
436
00:09:28,067 --> 00:09:31,067
$30 MILLION OFFER.
437
00:09:31,067 --> 00:09:32,527
NOW, MELANIE, ON THE OTHER
438
00:09:32,533 --> 00:09:34,933
HAND -- SHE'S FREE TO GO.
439
00:09:34,933 --> 00:09:36,303
OOH.
440
00:09:36,300 --> 00:09:38,530
[ KNOCK ON DOOR ]
441
00:09:38,533 --> 00:09:40,203
>> WHAT'S UP, MALIK?
442
00:09:40,200 --> 00:09:42,070
>> POOKIE, YOU MAY ENTER.
443
00:09:42,067 --> 00:09:43,267
>> OKAY.
444
00:09:43,267 --> 00:09:44,727
HEY, BABY.
445
00:09:44,733 --> 00:09:51,573
>> POOKIE...HAVE A SEAT, PLEASE.
446
00:09:51,567 --> 00:09:52,467
>> [ SIGHS ]
447
00:09:52,467 --> 00:09:53,967
>> POOKIE, THE REASON WE ARE ALL
448
00:09:53,967 --> 00:09:55,127
GATHERED HERE TODAY IS BECAUSE
449
00:09:55,133 --> 00:09:56,833
MY MOTHER, TASHA MACK, HAS
450
00:09:56,833 --> 00:09:58,803
SOMETHING SHE WANTS TO CONFRONT
451
00:09:58,800 --> 00:09:59,400
YOU WITH.
452
00:09:59,400 --> 00:10:00,670
PROCEED WITH THE CONFRONTATION,
453
00:10:00,667 --> 00:10:01,397
MAMA.
454
00:10:01,400 --> 00:10:02,400
>> THANK YOU, SON.
455
00:10:02,400 --> 00:10:03,000
>> MM-HMM.
456
00:10:03,000 --> 00:10:04,200
>> SO, I SPOKE TO YOUR LITTLE
457
00:10:04,200 --> 00:10:05,470
CONCUBINE.
458
00:10:05,467 --> 00:10:06,327
OH, YEAH.
459
00:10:06,333 --> 00:10:07,433
AND SHE TOLD ME ALL ABOUT YOUR
460
00:10:07,433 --> 00:10:08,303
LITTLE DALLIANCE.
461
00:10:08,300 --> 00:10:08,900
>> [ GASPS ]
462
00:10:08,900 --> 00:10:10,300
>> TASHA, I TOLD YOU TO BACK OFF
463
00:10:10,300 --> 00:10:11,770
THAT SITUATION AND I WILL HANDLE
464
00:10:11,767 --> 00:10:12,797
IT WHEN I GOT TO RICHMOND.
465
00:10:12,800 --> 00:10:13,870
>> OKAY, AND I TOLD YOU THAT
466
00:10:13,867 --> 00:10:14,967
THAT WAS NOT GONNA WORK, DIDN'T
467
00:10:14,967 --> 00:10:15,297
I?
468
00:10:15,300 --> 00:10:16,470
SO I FIGURED, WHY WAIT?
469
00:10:16,467 --> 00:10:16,897
>> MM.
470
00:10:16,900 --> 00:10:18,170
>> MALIK, WOULD YOU DO THE
471
00:10:18,167 --> 00:10:19,027
HONORS, PLEASE?
472
00:10:19,033 --> 00:10:20,333
>> ABSOLUTELY, TASHA MACK.
473
00:10:20,333 --> 00:10:27,373
UNH! COME ON OUT, RESHEIDA!
474
00:10:27,367 --> 00:10:28,997
>> HELLO, POOKIE.
475
00:10:29,000 --> 00:10:29,970
>> YOU SAID YOU WERE GONNA
476
00:10:29,967 --> 00:10:31,897
HANDLE IT, SO HANDLE IT.
477
00:10:31,900 --> 00:10:32,770
>> NOT NOW, TASHA.
478
00:10:32,767 --> 00:10:34,167
NOT LIKE THIS.
479
00:10:34,167 --> 00:10:35,467
>> WHAT THE HELL YOU MEAN "NOT
480
00:10:35,467 --> 00:10:35,867
NOW"?
481
00:10:35,867 --> 00:10:37,267
WHAT THE HELL YOU STALLING FOR,
482
00:10:37,267 --> 00:10:37,627
HUH?
483
00:10:37,633 --> 00:10:39,003
WHAT? YOU SAID Y'ALL AIN'T
484
00:10:39,000 --> 00:10:40,100
TOGETHER, RIGHT?
485
00:10:40,100 --> 00:10:40,930
>> NO, NO, NO.
486
00:10:40,933 --> 00:10:42,433
I SAID WE WERE NOT OFFICIALLY
487
00:10:42,433 --> 00:10:44,133
TOGETHER...YET.
488
00:10:44,133 --> 00:10:45,203
>> UH, OOH, OOH.
489
00:10:45,200 --> 00:10:47,570
MALIK, YOU NEED TO MEDIATE THAT.
490
00:10:47,567 --> 00:10:49,897
>> RESHEIDA, I'M NOT GIVING YOU
491
00:10:49,900 --> 00:10:51,770
PERMISSION TO SPEAK YET, OKAY?
492
00:10:51,767 --> 00:10:53,067
>> LOOK, THIS IS RIDICULOUS.
493
00:10:53,067 --> 00:10:54,867
LOOK, POOKIE, I KNOW THAT WHEN
494
00:10:54,867 --> 00:10:56,767
YOU LET ME MOVE IN WITH YOU, YOU
495
00:10:56,767 --> 00:10:58,327
WERE DOING ME A FAVOR AS A
496
00:10:58,333 --> 00:10:58,773
FRIEND.
497
00:10:58,767 --> 00:10:59,297
>> RIGHT.
498
00:10:59,300 --> 00:11:01,070
>> BUT WHEN WE STARTED HAVING
499
00:11:01,067 --> 00:11:01,667
SEX...
500
00:11:01,667 --> 00:11:02,397
>> [ GASPS ]
501
00:11:02,400 --> 00:11:04,830
>> ...I FELL FOR YOU, AND THEN,
502
00:11:04,833 --> 00:11:06,073
WHEN I HEARD THAT YOU WERE
503
00:11:06,067 --> 00:11:08,797
MOVING OUT AND MOVING ON TO THIS
504
00:11:08,800 --> 00:11:10,870
WOMAN, WELL, I DECIDED I WAS NOT
505
00:11:10,867 --> 00:11:13,867
GONNA GIVE UP WITHOUT A FIGHT.
506
00:11:13,867 --> 00:11:17,067
>> [ BREATHES DEEPLY ]
507
00:11:17,067 --> 00:11:18,227
[ CLEARS THROAT ] OKAY.
508
00:11:18,233 --> 00:11:20,703
UH.
509
00:11:20,700 --> 00:11:23,470
THIS IS NOT THE IDEAL SITUATION
510
00:11:23,467 --> 00:11:24,697
TO HAVE THIS TYPE OF
511
00:11:24,700 --> 00:11:25,500
CONVERSATION.
512
00:11:25,500 --> 00:11:26,630
>> MNH-MNH.
513
00:11:26,633 --> 00:11:28,503
>> TRUST ME -- I WOULD HAVE
514
00:11:28,500 --> 00:11:30,870
NEVER WANTED IT TO HAPPEN THIS
515
00:11:30,867 --> 00:11:34,297
WAY, BUT, OBVIOUSLY, I DON'T
516
00:11:34,300 --> 00:11:37,070
HAVE A CHOICE, SO I'M GONNA JUST
517
00:11:37,067 --> 00:11:40,327
SAY IT.
518
00:11:40,333 --> 00:11:41,873
UNFORTUNATELY, I'M IN LOVE WITH
519
00:11:41,867 --> 00:11:43,367
TASHA.
520
00:11:43,367 --> 00:11:45,297
>> UNFORTUNATELY?
521
00:11:45,300 --> 00:11:46,230
WHAT THE HELL YOU MEAN --
522
00:11:46,233 --> 00:11:49,503
"UNFOR--"
523
00:11:49,500 --> 00:11:51,970
OH, MY GOD.
524
00:11:51,967 --> 00:11:53,467
POOKIE, DID YOU JUST SAY YOU IN
525
00:11:53,467 --> 00:11:54,527
LOVE WITH ME?
526
00:11:54,533 --> 00:11:56,503
>> TASHA, I'M IN LOVE WITH YOU,
527
00:11:56,500 --> 00:11:56,930
OKAY?
528
00:11:56,933 --> 00:11:57,533
>> OH, MY GOD.
529
00:11:57,533 --> 00:12:00,703
>> I LOVE YOU.
530
00:12:00,700 --> 00:12:03,070
>> [ BREATHES SHARPLY ]
531
00:12:03,067 --> 00:12:04,497
I WIN.
532
00:12:04,500 --> 00:12:06,500
OH, MY GOD. POOKIE.
533
00:12:06,500 --> 00:12:07,170
>> COME HERE.
534
00:12:07,167 --> 00:12:08,427
>> POOKIE, I LOVE YOU, TOO.
535
00:12:08,433 --> 00:12:09,733
I DO.
536
00:12:09,733 --> 00:12:17,733
I...LOVE...YOU.
537
00:12:17,733 --> 00:12:21,073
I'M SORRY.
538
00:12:21,067 --> 00:12:22,467
YOU OKAY?
539
00:12:22,467 --> 00:12:24,297
>> I'M FINE.
540
00:12:24,300 --> 00:12:26,470
>> I MEAN, I-I DID NOT WANT
541
00:12:26,467 --> 00:12:28,867
THINGS TO GO DOWN THIS WAY.
542
00:12:28,867 --> 00:12:29,867
I MEAN, WELL, THAT'S A LIE, YOU
543
00:12:29,867 --> 00:12:30,867
KNOW, 'CAUSE I DID WANT POOKIE
544
00:12:30,867 --> 00:12:33,297
TO CHOOSE ME, BUT, GIRL, I HAVE
545
00:12:33,300 --> 00:12:35,300
BEEN WHERE YOU ARE, OKAY?
546
00:12:35,300 --> 00:12:36,770
AND I'M SORRY THAT I ALLOWED ALL
547
00:12:36,767 --> 00:12:39,567
OF MY INSECURITIES TO, UH, PUSH
548
00:12:39,567 --> 00:12:40,767
YOU TO A PLACE OF FEELING
549
00:12:40,767 --> 00:12:41,397
INSECURE.
550
00:12:41,400 --> 00:12:42,530
>> I AM NOT INSECURE.
551
00:12:42,533 --> 00:12:44,403
>> BUT YOU WILL BE.
552
00:12:44,400 --> 00:12:46,830
ALL OF THESE HEARTBREAKS AND
553
00:12:46,833 --> 00:12:49,503
LETDOWNS -- GIRL, THEY GONNA ADD
554
00:12:49,500 --> 00:12:50,200
UP.
555
00:12:50,200 --> 00:12:51,170
AND THEN, ONE DAY, YOU'RE GONNA
556
00:12:51,167 --> 00:12:52,967
FIND YOURSELF IN A CLOSET WITH
557
00:12:52,967 --> 00:12:54,797
SOME RANDOM GIRL WHO'S 20 YEARS
558
00:12:54,800 --> 00:12:55,800
YOUNGER THAN YOU, AND YOU'RE
559
00:12:55,800 --> 00:12:58,900
GONNA BE WONDERING, "OHH, DOES
560
00:12:58,900 --> 00:13:00,670
MY WARDROBE NEED TO BE UPDATED?"
561
00:13:00,667 --> 00:13:05,967
>> UM, YES.
562
00:13:05,967 --> 00:13:09,827
>> RESHEIDA, LOOK -- BOTTOM LINE
563
00:13:09,833 --> 00:13:11,873
IS YOU'RE GONNA FIND YOUR
564
00:13:11,867 --> 00:13:14,697
PRINCE CHARMING.
565
00:13:14,700 --> 00:13:15,730
>> YEAH, MAYBE.
566
00:13:15,733 --> 00:13:16,833
>> NO, YOU ARE, HONEY.
567
00:13:16,833 --> 00:13:18,573
IT MIGHT TAKE YOU 40-SOME-ODD
568
00:13:18,567 --> 00:13:20,567
YEARS AND, YOU KNOW, A COUPLE OF
569
00:13:20,567 --> 00:13:22,627
POLYESTER SUITS AND MAYBE EVEN A
570
00:13:22,633 --> 00:13:23,673
LITTLE SPANDEX.
571
00:13:23,667 --> 00:13:25,327
[ CHUCKLES ]
572
00:13:25,333 --> 00:13:27,473
YOU'RE GONNA FIND HIM.
573
00:13:27,467 --> 00:13:28,497
AND WHEN YOU DO, YOU'RE NOT
574
00:13:28,500 --> 00:13:30,500
GONNA HAVE TO BEG HIM TO CHOOSE
575
00:13:30,500 --> 00:13:32,500
YOU.
576
00:13:33,733 --> 00:13:34,503
[ DOOR OPENS ]
577
00:13:34,500 --> 00:13:34,970
>> OH.
578
00:13:34,967 --> 00:13:35,827
>> [ HUMMING ]
579
00:13:35,833 --> 00:13:37,073
>> HEY, BUBBY.
580
00:13:37,067 --> 00:13:37,827
>> HEY, WHAT'S UP?
581
00:13:37,833 --> 00:13:39,503
OH! WHY DON'T YOU CALL ME FROM
582
00:13:39,500 --> 00:13:40,430
THE CAR TO HELP YOU WITH THE
583
00:13:40,433 --> 00:13:40,833
BAGS?
584
00:13:40,833 --> 00:13:41,933
I DON'T WANT TO YOU TO STRAIN
585
00:13:41,933 --> 00:13:42,703
YOUR BACK OR NOTHING.
586
00:13:42,700 --> 00:13:44,930
>> OKAY, WHAT IS ALL OF THIS?
587
00:13:44,933 --> 00:13:46,103
I JUST BOUGHT SOME STUFF TO MAKE
588
00:13:46,100 --> 00:13:46,630
DINNER.
589
00:13:46,633 --> 00:13:47,333
>> NO, NO.
590
00:13:47,333 --> 00:13:48,603
IT'S ABOUT TIME WE SHARE IN THE
591
00:13:48,600 --> 00:13:49,700
BURDEN OF THESE HOUSEHOLD
592
00:13:49,700 --> 00:13:50,370
RESPONSIBILITIES.
593
00:13:50,367 --> 00:13:52,527
TONIGHT WE ARE GOING TO HAVE A
594
00:13:52,533 --> 00:13:54,603
PASTA MOSTA-CAT-CCIOLI,
595
00:13:54,600 --> 00:13:56,770
COURTESY OF YOUR BOY,
596
00:13:56,767 --> 00:13:59,197
CHEF BOYAR-DOUBLE-D-ZEE, WHICH
597
00:13:59,200 --> 00:14:00,130
IS ME-ZEE.
598
00:14:00,133 --> 00:14:02,273
>> OKAY. IT'S MOSTACCIOLI.
599
00:14:02,267 --> 00:14:03,267
>> WHAT YOU SAID.
600
00:14:03,267 --> 00:14:05,127
HERE. I NEED YOU TO SIT DOWN.
601
00:14:05,133 --> 00:14:06,703
TAKE A LOAD OFF 'CAUSE WHAT I
602
00:14:06,700 --> 00:14:08,200
DID WAS I RECORDED ALL YOUR
603
00:14:08,200 --> 00:14:10,100
FAVORITE REALITY SHOWS, SO YOU
604
00:14:10,100 --> 00:14:12,670
CAN KEEP ME COMPANY WHILE I MAKE
605
00:14:12,667 --> 00:14:13,767
YOU DINNER.
606
00:14:13,767 --> 00:14:14,967
>> "HOARDERS"?
607
00:14:14,967 --> 00:14:15,397
>> YEP.
608
00:14:15,400 --> 00:14:16,530
>> "MY SECRET PREGNANCY"?
609
00:14:16,533 --> 00:14:17,403
>> YEP.
610
00:14:17,400 --> 00:14:19,300
>> "I'M PREGNANT AND SECRETLY
611
00:14:19,300 --> 00:14:19,800
HOARD"?
612
00:14:19,800 --> 00:14:20,600
>> YEP, YEAH.
613
00:14:20,600 --> 00:14:23,500
>> [ LAUGHS ] YES!
614
00:14:23,500 --> 00:14:24,330
WAIT A MINUTE.
615
00:14:24,333 --> 00:14:25,533
WHAT'S GOING ON?
616
00:14:25,533 --> 00:14:27,533
WHY ARE YOU BEING NICE TO ME ALL
617
00:14:27,533 --> 00:14:28,073
OF A SUDDEN?
618
00:14:28,067 --> 00:14:29,327
>> I'M ALWAYS NICE TO YOU.
619
00:14:29,333 --> 00:14:30,103
>> NO, DERWIN.
620
00:14:30,100 --> 00:14:31,230
THE LAST TIME WE WATCHED A
621
00:14:31,233 --> 00:14:32,673
REALITY SHOW TOGETHER, YOU THREW
622
00:14:32,667 --> 00:14:33,627
THE REMOTE AT THE TV.
623
00:14:33,633 --> 00:14:34,573
>> THAT'S BECAUSE THAT
624
00:14:34,567 --> 00:14:35,867
BACHELORETTE CHOSE WRONG.
625
00:14:35,867 --> 00:14:38,327
[ DOORBELL RINGS ]
626
00:14:38,333 --> 00:14:39,873
THERE'S MY SURPRISE DINNER GUEST
627
00:14:39,867 --> 00:14:40,597
FOR YOU.
628
00:14:40,600 --> 00:14:42,070
CLOSE YOUR EYES.
629
00:14:42,067 --> 00:14:44,197
CL-- JUST CLOSE YOUR EYES, MEL.
630
00:14:44,200 --> 00:14:47,470
>> [ SIGHS ]
631
00:14:47,467 --> 00:14:50,767
[ DOOR OPENS ]
632
00:14:50,767 --> 00:14:52,097
OH, COME ON, DERWIN.
633
00:14:52,100 --> 00:14:56,430
>> I'M COMING.
634
00:14:56,433 --> 00:14:58,503
OPEN YOUR EYES.
635
00:14:58,500 --> 00:15:02,200
SURPRISE.
636
00:15:02,200 --> 00:15:03,770
>> SCREECH.
637
00:15:03,767 --> 00:15:05,897
>> IT'S ACTUALLY DUSTIN.
638
00:15:05,900 --> 00:15:08,870
>> MM. CAN YOU EXCUSE US FOR A
639
00:15:08,867 --> 00:15:10,497
MOMENT, DUSTIN?
640
00:15:10,500 --> 00:15:11,130
>> YEAH. SURE.
641
00:15:11,133 --> 00:15:13,673
NO PROBLEM.
642
00:15:13,667 --> 00:15:15,497
>> [ SIGHS ]
643
00:15:15,500 --> 00:15:17,270
DERWIN, WHAT THE HELL IS SCREECH
644
00:15:17,267 --> 00:15:18,297
FROM "SAVED BY THE BELL" DOING
645
00:15:18,300 --> 00:15:18,700
HERE?
646
00:15:18,700 --> 00:15:20,170
>> LISTEN, DUSTIN'S MY GIFT TO
647
00:15:20,167 --> 00:15:20,567
YOU.
648
00:15:20,567 --> 00:15:21,627
I REMEMBER, BACK IN COLLEGE, YOU
649
00:15:21,633 --> 00:15:22,633
USED TO ALWAYS WATCH RERUNS OF
650
00:15:22,633 --> 00:15:23,373
"SAVED BY THE BELL."
651
00:15:23,367 --> 00:15:24,397
YOU USED TO GO ON AND ON ABOUT
652
00:15:24,400 --> 00:15:25,470
SCREECH, LIKE HE WAS YOUR DUDE.
653
00:15:25,467 --> 00:15:26,067
>> NO, NO, NO.
654
00:15:26,067 --> 00:15:27,067
I USED TO HATE SCREECH BECAUSE
655
00:15:27,067 --> 00:15:27,967
HE WAS ALWAYS HITTING ON THAT
656
00:15:27,967 --> 00:15:29,297
ONE BLACK CHICK, LISA TURTLE.
657
00:15:29,300 --> 00:15:31,070
IT WAS PRINCIPAL BELDING THAT I
658
00:15:31,067 --> 00:15:32,127
LOVED.
659
00:15:32,133 --> 00:15:33,303
>> OH, REALLY?
660
00:15:33,300 --> 00:15:34,070
>> [ SCOFFS ]
661
00:15:34,067 --> 00:15:35,527
EW, REALLY?
662
00:15:35,533 --> 00:15:37,073
OKAY. WHAT THE HELL IS GOING ON?
663
00:15:37,067 --> 00:15:39,097
I KNOW SOMETHING IS UP, OKAY?
664
00:15:39,100 --> 00:15:40,430
IT'S NOT EVERY DAY THAT YOU
665
00:15:40,433 --> 00:15:42,273
BRING HOME A '90s CHILD STAR FOR
666
00:15:42,267 --> 00:15:43,127
DINNER.
667
00:15:43,133 --> 00:15:44,673
>> FINE.
668
00:15:44,667 --> 00:15:46,467
FINE.
669
00:15:46,467 --> 00:15:47,627
I WASN'T SURE HOW TO BREAK THE
670
00:15:47,633 --> 00:15:50,233
NEWS TO YOU, SO I'M JUST GONNA
671
00:15:50,233 --> 00:15:50,933
COME OUT AND SAY IT.
672
00:15:50,933 --> 00:15:52,073
>> OKAY.
673
00:15:52,067 --> 00:15:53,697
>> SCREECH, TELL HER.
674
00:15:53,700 --> 00:15:55,070
>> UH. UH, OKAY.
675
00:15:55,067 --> 00:15:56,427
IT -- IT'S DUSTIN.
676
00:15:56,433 --> 00:15:57,073
>> MM-HMM.
677
00:15:57,067 --> 00:15:57,967
>> ALL RIGHT.
678
00:15:57,967 --> 00:15:59,727
UM, TODAY, IRV CAME BY WITH A
679
00:15:59,733 --> 00:16:01,673
$50 MILLION CONTRACT OFFER
680
00:16:01,667 --> 00:16:03,597
FROM -- WAIT FOR IT --
681
00:16:03,600 --> 00:16:04,630
THE SABERS.
682
00:16:04,633 --> 00:16:05,433
>> BAM!
683
00:16:05,433 --> 00:16:05,873
>> RIGHT?
684
00:16:05,867 --> 00:16:07,067
>> IT SOUNDS SO MUCH BETTER WHEN
685
00:16:07,067 --> 00:16:08,067
SCREECH SAYS IT.
686
00:16:08,067 --> 00:16:09,427
>> WELL, MAYBE THE FACT THAT
687
00:16:09,433 --> 00:16:10,873
THE SABRES ARE SO INTERESTED
688
00:16:10,867 --> 00:16:13,697
MIGHT EVEN SPARK MORE INTEREST
689
00:16:13,700 --> 00:16:15,070
WITH D.C.
690
00:16:15,067 --> 00:16:16,197
SO THIS IS GREAT.
691
00:16:16,200 --> 00:16:17,930
>> TALK TO HER, SCREECH.
692
00:16:17,933 --> 00:16:19,133
>> OKAY. HERE'S THE THING --
693
00:16:19,133 --> 00:16:20,633
THERE IS NO D.C.
694
00:16:20,633 --> 00:16:21,603
THEY'RE OFFERING TO PAY DERWIN
695
00:16:21,600 --> 00:16:22,800
LIKE $20 MILLION LESS.
696
00:16:22,800 --> 00:16:23,530
>> OHH, GOD FORBID.
697
00:16:23,533 --> 00:16:24,573
WE CAN'T BUY THAT EXTRA ISLAND
698
00:16:24,567 --> 00:16:24,897
NOW.
699
00:16:24,900 --> 00:16:25,800
LOOK, COME ON, SCREECH.
700
00:16:25,800 --> 00:16:26,730
WHO CARES ABOUT AN EXTRA
701
00:16:26,733 --> 00:16:27,703
20 MILLION BUCKS?
702
00:16:27,700 --> 00:16:28,330
WE'RE RICH.
703
00:16:28,333 --> 00:16:29,533
>> THAT'S NOT THE POINT.
704
00:16:29,533 --> 00:16:30,933
THIS TYPE OF CONTRACT OFFER IS
705
00:16:30,933 --> 00:16:31,973
UNHEARD OF.
706
00:16:31,967 --> 00:16:33,067
HE'LL BE THE HIGHEST-PAID
707
00:16:33,067 --> 00:16:34,227
RECEIVER IN THE LEAGUE.
708
00:16:34,233 --> 00:16:35,703
YOU CAN'T JUST SKIP PAST THAT.
709
00:16:35,700 --> 00:16:36,730
I MEAN, IT'S HUGE.
710
00:16:36,733 --> 00:16:37,433
>> HUGE.
711
00:16:37,433 --> 00:16:38,733
>> AND SO IS GOING TO
712
00:16:38,733 --> 00:16:40,203
JOHNS HOPKINS AND DOING THIS
713
00:16:40,200 --> 00:16:41,070
RESEARCH POSITION.
714
00:16:41,067 --> 00:16:41,867
>> FIRST OF ALL, YOU CAN'T EVEN
715
00:16:41,867 --> 00:16:42,497
COMPARE THOSE TWO.
716
00:16:42,500 --> 00:16:43,130
>> YEAH.
717
00:16:43,133 --> 00:16:44,473
>> WHY -- BECAUSE MY NEEDS ARE
718
00:16:44,467 --> 00:16:45,367
LESS IMPORTANT THAN YOURS?
719
00:16:45,367 --> 00:16:45,767
>> NO.
720
00:16:45,767 --> 00:16:46,867
HOW CAN YOU EVEN SAY THAT?
721
00:16:46,867 --> 00:16:48,227
THIS DOESN'T MAKE ANY SENSE, ALL
722
00:16:48,233 --> 00:16:48,703
RIGHT?
723
00:16:48,700 --> 00:16:50,300
>> EASY, EASY. HOLD ON. HOLD ON.
724
00:16:50,300 --> 00:16:51,630
STILL MY WIFE. BRING IT DOWN.
725
00:16:51,633 --> 00:16:52,703
>> LOOK, MELANIE, I'M SORRY
726
00:16:52,700 --> 00:16:53,830
THINGS WENT DOWN THE WAY THEY
727
00:16:53,833 --> 00:16:55,733
HAVE, BUT LIFE HAPPENS, OKAY?
728
00:16:55,733 --> 00:16:57,173
AND THIS DECISION HAS ALREADY
729
00:16:57,167 --> 00:16:57,867
BEEN MADE.
730
00:16:57,867 --> 00:16:59,467
WE'D JUST LOVE IT IF YOU'D GET
731
00:16:59,467 --> 00:17:00,367
ON BOARD WITH IT.
732
00:17:00,367 --> 00:17:02,367
>> [ CLICKS TONGUE ]
733
00:17:02,367 --> 00:17:04,527
>> WELL, THAT WON'T BE POSSIBLE
734
00:17:04,532 --> 00:17:05,972
BECAUSE I'VE ALREADY MADE MY
735
00:17:05,967 --> 00:17:08,197
DECISION, TOO.
736
00:17:08,200 --> 00:17:09,530
I'M GOING TO D.C.
737
00:17:09,532 --> 00:17:10,532
>> REALLY?
738
00:17:10,532 --> 00:17:11,602
>> REALLY.
739
00:17:11,599 --> 00:17:14,869
REALLY.
740
00:17:14,867 --> 00:17:16,127
[ FOOTSTEPS ]
741
00:17:16,133 --> 00:17:16,933
>> [ SIGHS ]
742
00:17:16,933 --> 00:17:22,073
[ MID-TEMPO MUSIC PLAYS ]
743
00:17:22,067 --> 00:17:23,667
HEY.
744
00:17:23,666 --> 00:17:29,496
SO...SHE GONE?
745
00:17:29,500 --> 00:17:32,130
>> OHH. YEAH.
746
00:17:32,133 --> 00:17:34,073
PUT THE POOR GIRL IN A CAB AND
747
00:17:34,067 --> 00:17:35,567
SENT HER OFF TO THE AIRPORT.
748
00:17:35,567 --> 00:17:38,567
>> MM. DO NOT ACT LIKE I'M THE
749
00:17:38,567 --> 00:17:39,697
ONLY ONE RESPONSIBLE FOR
750
00:17:39,700 --> 00:17:40,930
SCREWING THAT POOR GIRL OVER,
751
00:17:40,933 --> 00:17:41,633
OKAY?
752
00:17:41,633 --> 00:17:42,773
>> NO, I WAS JUST SCREWING HER,
753
00:17:42,767 --> 00:17:45,067
BUT YOU -- YOU SCREWED HER OVER.
754
00:17:45,067 --> 00:17:45,527
>> WHAT?!
755
00:17:45,533 --> 00:17:45,933
>> YES.
756
00:17:45,933 --> 00:17:47,233
>> NO, YOU WERE THE ONE THAT WAS
757
00:17:47,233 --> 00:17:48,273
SLEEPING WITH HER, KNOWING YOU
758
00:17:48,267 --> 00:17:49,327
DIDN'T HAVE NO DAMN FEELINGS FOR
759
00:17:49,333 --> 00:17:49,703
HER.
760
00:17:49,700 --> 00:17:50,430
>> WAIT A MINUTE.
761
00:17:50,433 --> 00:17:51,503
>> AND THAT AIN'T COOL, FOOL.
762
00:17:51,500 --> 00:17:52,230
>> WAIT A MINUTE.
763
00:17:52,233 --> 00:17:52,673
>> WHAT?
764
00:17:52,667 --> 00:17:53,827
>> ALL RIGHT, NOW, RESHEIDA IS A
765
00:17:53,833 --> 00:17:54,633
GROWN...WOMAN...
766
00:17:54,633 --> 00:17:55,073
>> MM-HMM.
767
00:17:55,067 --> 00:17:56,097
>> ...A GROWN...WOMAN THAT
768
00:17:56,100 --> 00:17:58,430
INITIATED SEX WITH ME OFTEN.
769
00:17:58,433 --> 00:18:00,173
>> OKAY. WELL, BUT WHAT THE HELL
770
00:18:00,167 --> 00:18:01,197
SHE SUPPOSED TO THINK?
771
00:18:01,200 --> 00:18:02,400
COME ON, YOU SLEEPING WITH HER.
772
00:18:02,400 --> 00:18:02,830
>> RIGHT.
773
00:18:02,833 --> 00:18:03,773
>> OKAY, NOT TO MENTION THAT
774
00:18:03,767 --> 00:18:04,667
YOU'RE SHACKING UP WITH THE
775
00:18:04,667 --> 00:18:05,167
GIRL, OKAY?
776
00:18:05,167 --> 00:18:06,127
OF COURSE SHE GONNA THINK IT'S
777
00:18:06,133 --> 00:18:07,603
MORE THAN FRIENDSHIP.
778
00:18:07,600 --> 00:18:10,100
IF IT WALKS LIKE A DUCK, IT HAS
779
00:18:10,100 --> 00:18:14,170
SEX LIKE A DUCK, IT'S A DUCK.
780
00:18:14,167 --> 00:18:15,827
>> BUT IF YOU COOK IT WELL
781
00:18:15,833 --> 00:18:16,503
ENOUGH...
782
00:18:16,500 --> 00:18:17,100
>> UH-HUH?
783
00:18:17,100 --> 00:18:20,070
>> ...IT TASTES LIKE CHICKEN.
784
00:18:20,067 --> 00:18:22,197
>> [ LAUGHS ]
785
00:18:22,200 --> 00:18:23,770
>> SEE, BUT THE PROBLEM IS, YOU
786
00:18:23,767 --> 00:18:25,327
GIVE A WOMAN AN INCH AND THEY
787
00:18:25,333 --> 00:18:27,903
TAKE A DAMN MILE.
788
00:18:27,900 --> 00:18:30,670
>> IS THAT WHAT I'M DOING?
789
00:18:30,667 --> 00:18:31,897
AM I TAKING A MILE?
790
00:18:31,900 --> 00:18:33,530
NO, I MEAN SERIOUSLY.
791
00:18:33,533 --> 00:18:35,633
AM I ASSUMING THAT THIS
792
00:18:35,633 --> 00:18:36,873
RELATIONSHIP IS MORE THAN WHAT
793
00:18:36,867 --> 00:18:38,567
IT IS?
794
00:18:38,567 --> 00:18:39,827
I AIN'T TRYING TO BE NO COOKED
795
00:18:39,833 --> 00:18:41,733
DUCK.
796
00:18:41,733 --> 00:18:46,533
>> I LOVE YOU.
797
00:18:46,533 --> 00:18:48,233
OKAY?
798
00:18:48,233 --> 00:18:49,373
THAT'S WHY I AIN'T NEVER TRIED
799
00:18:49,367 --> 00:18:51,867
NOTHING ON YOU.
800
00:18:51,867 --> 00:18:53,597
>> SO THAT'S WHY WE AIN'T
801
00:18:53,600 --> 00:18:54,470
DUCKING?
802
00:18:54,467 --> 00:18:58,067
>> [ CHUCKLES ]
803
00:18:58,067 --> 00:19:00,927
YOU, GIRL, YOU -- NO, YOU SOME
804
00:19:00,933 --> 00:19:03,073
REAL CHICKEN.
805
00:19:03,067 --> 00:19:03,927
>> REAL CHICKEN?
806
00:19:03,933 --> 00:19:04,703
>> YOU'RE REAL CHICKEN.
807
00:19:04,700 --> 00:19:05,400
>> I'M CHICKEN?
808
00:19:05,400 --> 00:19:06,070
>> MMM.
809
00:19:06,067 --> 00:19:06,867
>> BAKED OR FRIED?
810
00:19:06,867 --> 00:19:08,397
>> MMM.LUCK!
811
00:19:08,400 --> 00:19:13,100
>> MM.
812
00:19:13,150 --> 00:19:17,700
Repair and Synchronization by
Easy Subtitles Synchronizer 1.0.0.0
49237
Can't find what you're looking for?
Get subtitles in any language from opensubtitles.com, and translate them here.