Original subtitles

>> [ SIGHS ]

>> WHERE IN THE HELL DID YOU GET

THIS FROM?

>> I HAD MALIK'S PUBLICIST MAKE

A FEW CALLS.

TURNED OUT THAT LITTLE

SURI CRUISE, SHE GOT AN EXTRA

ONE FOR CHRISTMAS, AND SHE WAS

WILLING TO GIVE IT UP FOR A

SMALL FEE.

THAT LITTLE DIVA CAN HAGGLE!

>> YOU KNOW, THIS REMINDS ME

WHEN WE USED TO GET ON TOP OF

MISS TAYLOR'S CAR AND LOOK FOR

SHOOTING STARS BACK IN THE DAY.

>> AND THEN THEY STARTED

SHOOTING BULLETS, AND WE

PRETENDED LIKE WE WAS DEAD TILL

THEY DROVE OFF.

REMEMBER THAT?

>> THAT'S RIGHT. THAT'S RIGHT.

>> BOTH: WOW.

>> MAN, WE'VE COME A LONG WAY

FROM BEING LITTLE HOOD RATS.

>> YEAH.

>> I MISS IT SOMETIMES.

>> HMM.

ME, TOO.

>> YEAH?

>> YEAH.

>> YEAH. [ SLOW-TEMPO MUSIC PLAYS ]

[ SLOW-TEMPO MUSIC PLAYS ]

[ KNOCK ON DOOR ]

>> OCCUPADO!

>> TASHA, OPEN UP!

IT'S ME, MELANIE!

>> OH! Shh.

[ Whispering ] LET'S PRETEND

THAT WE AIN'T HERE.

>> GIRL, I KNOW YOU'RE IN THERE.

I CAN HEAR THE MUSIC.

>> GOD, THIS BETTER BE AN

EMERGENCY, OR I SWEAR THAT

LITTLE GIRL, SHE GONNA BE RIGHT

BACK ON MY LIST, RIGHT BEHIND

BACK ON MY LIST, RIGHT BEHIND THAT SURI CRUISE.

THAT SURI CRUISE.

[ KNOCK ON DOOR ]

>> OKAY, OKAY.

GIRL, YOU LOOK ABOUT 12 KINDS OF

CRAZY.

>> DERWIN SAID YES!

YOU CAN HAVE OUR BABY!

[ LAUGHS ]

>> Shh!

>> GOD, I'M SO SORRY!

I COULDN'T WAIT UNTIL MORNING.

I WAS SO EXCITED I COULD BURST!

>> OKAY, OKAY!

Shh!

>> OKAY, I TRY TO BE THE ONLY

SISTER UP IN THIS FIVE-STAR

HOTEL ACTING A FOOL, NOW.

>> WELL, SPEAKING OF ACTING A

FOOL.

>> OH, GIRL, GOOD IDEA.

'CAUSE I CAN USE A DRINK RIGHT

ABOUT NOW.

>> NOPE.

NO MORE ALCOHOL FOR YOU, MISSY.

>> WHAT ARE YOU DOING?!

>> YOU ARE GOING FROM

WILD TURKEY TO COLD TURKEY

ASAP.

OOH! WHICH REMINDS ME.

>> MY WEED CARD?

GIRL, I WILL KILL YOU.

>> OH, BETTER ME THAN THE BABY.

LOOK, TOMORROW I'M GONNA BRING

OVER SOME PRENATAL VITAMINS FOR

YOU.

YOU KNOW, FOLIC ACID, IRON,

FISH OILS.

OH! AND IN THE MEANTIME, HERE,

TAKE THESE.

IT'S DERWIN'S CREATINE AND

D.J.'s FLINTSTONE VITAMINS.

IT'S ALL I COULD FIND IN THE

HOUSE.

OH, AND, UH -- WHERE IS IT?

HERE.

>> WHAT IS THIS?

>> I MADE A LIST OF ALL THE

FOODS THAT YOU SHOULD AVOID

WHILE TTC -- TRYING TO CONCEIVE.

TASHA, WE ARE ABOUT TO EMBARK

ON AN AMAZING JOURNEY ONLY A FEW

WOMEN SHARE.

GOD, I FEEL SO CLOSE TO YOU

RIGHT NOW.

I CAN TRULY CALL YOU MY SISTER

IN MOTHERHOOD.

[ SMOOCHING ]

AHHH!

AHHH! OKAY, BYE.

OKAY, BYE.

OKAY, BYE. >> ♪♪

>> ♪♪

>> HA! YES, GINA!

>> WHAT THE HELL IS SHE WEARING?

>> YOU CRAZY. THAT'S REAL CUTE.

>> WHAT? WHOA!

BLACKOUT!

>> DAMN!

>> WHERE'S MY WALLET?

>> OW!

MY HERO.

>> OH, YOU OKAY?

OOH, I HAVE A DAUGHTER.

I HOPE SHE'S OKAY.

I'M SURE SHE'S FINE.

WHERE'S MY WALLET?

>> RELAX, JASON,THEY PROBABLY

JUST TURNED OFF MY ELECTRICITY.

>> WHAT?

DID YOU DO THIS TO SOMEONE?

>> NO, MY TAKE THIS MONTH FROM

THE BAR WAS LIGHTER THAN USUAL.

>> REALLY?

WAS IT BECAUSE OF THIS?

>> NO, I HAVE FEWER SHIFTS.

>> AND?

>> AND A LITTLE BIT OF THIS,

OKAY?

BUT ANYWAY, I RAN SHORT ON

CASH, SO IT WAS EITHER PAY MY

ELECTRICITY BILL OR MAKE MY

MONTHLY DEPOSIT INTO THE

SPADONNAY SAVINGS ACCOUNT.

I CHOSE THE LATER.

>> SO, WHAT, YOU'RE GONNA SIT

HERE IN THE DARK JUST SO YOU

CAN BE 50 BUCKS CLOSER TO YOUR

SPA THAT'S NEVER GONNA HAPPEN?

>> EXCUSE ME?

>> COME ON, CHAR. SPADONNAY?

YOU WANT TO THROW YOUR MONEY

AWAY, GIVE IT TO CHARITY, OKAY?

AT LEAST YOU GET THE WRITE-OFF.

>> YOU KNOW WHAT?

YOU MAY NOT BELIEVE IN

SPADONNAY, BUT CHARDONNAY

DOES, OKAY?

>> BABY, YOU CAN'T AFFORD A

LIGHTER, ALL RIGHT?

TELL YOU WHAT I'M GONNA DO.

WHY DON'T I JUST GI-I-I-I--

[ CLEARS THROAT ]

>> WHAT?

>> I'M GONNA GI-I-I-I--

[ CLEARS THROAT ]

>> HUH?

>> WHY DON'T I JUST GIVE YOU

THE MONEY?

OOH, THERE, I SAID IT.

YUCK. UGH.

YEAH, I'M GONNA -- I'M GONNA

GIVE YOU THE MONEY.

>> OH, MY GOD, JASON!

FOR SPADONNAY?

>> HELL, NO!

ARE YOU KIDDING ME?

THAT WOULD BE CRAZY.

NO, I'M TALKING ABOUT YOUR

ELECTRIC BILL, SILLY.

CAN'T HAVE MY LADY LIVING IN THE

DARK.

>> I APPRECIATE IT,

O, ENLIGHTENED ONE, BUT I'M

OKAY, 'CAUSE I'M AN...

>> AN INDEPENDENT WOMAN?

>> AND I DON'T...

>> NEED NO MAN TO PAY FOR MY

BLAH, BLAH, BLAH, BLAH.

YOU KNOW WHAT?

NOBODY'S BUYING IT, OKAY?

YOU GOT A RICH FRIEND THAT

WANTS TO HELP YOU OUT.

GET OVER IT.

LET ME HELP YOU OUT.

>> UNH-UNH. A FRIEND?

>> JUST -- I WANT TO HELP YOU,

OKAY?

>> A LOAN.

>> NO, NO, YOU DON'T HAVE TO PAY

ME -- YOU KNOW WHAT? YEAH.

YOU CAN PAY ME BACK IN

SPADONNAY STOCK.

IT'S THE SAME THING.

>> STOP KNOCKING MY DREAM,

JASON!

>> STOP ACTING LIKE YOU DON'T

NEED THE MONEY.

STOP HITTING ME IN THE HEAD.

>> OKAY.

I'M GONNA PAY YOU BACK, FRIEND.

WHEN YOU LEAST EXPECT IT, EXPECT

WHEN YOU LEAST EXPECT IT, EXPECT IT.

IT.

>> ALL RIGHT.

ALL RIGHT, ALL RIGHT.

SO, THANKS FOR MEETING ME

HERE, TEE TEE.

I NEED YOUR ADVICE.

>> THAT'S BECOMING A REAL

HABIT WITH US, HUH, MISS MACK?

IT'S LIKE I'M THE SPOCK TO YOUR

KIRK, OR THE YODA TO YOUR

SKYWALKER.

THE GAIL TO YOUR OPRAH?

>> OKAY, LONG AS I'M OPRAH.

>> SUCCESSFUL IN LIFE BUT NOT IN

LOVE.

YEAH, YOU OPRAH, ALL RIGHT.

>> ALL RIGHT, LOOK, TEE TEE, I

DONE GOT MYSELF IN A PICKLE.

OKAY, HOW THE HELL AM I SUPPOSED

TO TELL POOKIE THAT I'M HAVING

SOMEBODY ELSE'S BABY FOR THE

SECOND TIME?

>> WHAT YOU MEAN, SECOND TIME?

>> WELL, YOU KNOW, BACK IN THE

DAY, I SWEAR, POOKIE, HE WAS

FEELING ME.

BUT THEN I GOT PREGNANT WITH

MALIK.

>> SO, NOW, HOW AM I GONNA TELL

HIM THAT I'M GONNA BE A

SURROGATE FOR DERWIN AND

MELANIE?

>> [ SCOFFS ]

IT'S A WRAP, MISS MACK.

>> WHAT YOU MEAN, IT'S A WRAP?

COME ON, THIS IS DIFFERENT THIS

TIME, OKAY?

IT AIN'T LIKE I'M SCREWING

DERWIN OR SOMETHING.

>> WELL, LOOK, ANYWAY, IT

DON'T MATTER, 'CAUSE POOKIE'S

A REAL MAN, UNLIKE DERWIN.

HE AIN'T GONNA UNDERSTAND YOU

RENTING OUT YOUR WOMB LIKE

A TIME-SHARE.

>> ALL RIGHT, SO, WHAT AM I

SUPPOSED TO DO?

>> WELL, FIRST OF ALL, YOU'RE

NOT THE ONLY PERSON WHO COULD

BE THEIR SURROGATE.

I MEAN, IN THIS ECONOMY, WHY

DON'T THEY JUST LOOK ON

CRAIGSLIST?

YOU AIN'T THE ONLY WOMAN IN

TOWN.

AND ON TOP OF THAT, WHAT'D I

TELL YOU ABOUT CHOOSING

YOURSELF?

IT'S TIME, MISS MACK.

SO, YOU NEED TO CALL MELANIE

AND HER ILL-ADVISED CHOICE,

DERWIN, AND TELL THEM YOU

CAN'T GO THROUGH WITH THIS

NONSENSE BECAUSE YOU WANT A

NONSENSE BECAUSE YOU WANT A CHANCE AT HAPPINESS WITH POOKIE.

CHANCE AT HAPPINESS WITH POOKIE.

>> UM, UNLOCKED DOOR?

SERIOUSLY?

THIS ISN'T MAYBERRY, OKAY?

I'M JUST SAYING, THERE ARE ALL

KIND OF -- HEY.

HI.

WHAT'S -- WHAT'S GOING ON?

>> OH, THIS IS MY SIDE HUSTLE --

HAIRDONNAY.

>> I'M SENSING A THEME.

>> UH, YEAH, THE THEME IS

GETTING THIS MONEY.

OKAY.

OH, SPEAKING OF WHICH, GOT YOUR

CHECK, WITH INTEREST.

>> WHAT? WITH INTEREST?

WATCH YOURSELF.

IT'S NOT GONNA BOUNCE, IS IT?

>> WHY IT GOT TO BOUNCE?

>> RIGHT?

BABY, IT'S NOT GONNA BOUNCE.

>> NO, IT'S NOT GONNA BOUNCE.

BUT, SERIOUSLY, IS IT?

>> OF COURSE NOT.

>> OF COURSE NOT.

HURRY UP. DO WHAT YOU GOT TO DO.

I'M GONNA TAKE YOU OUT TO

DINNER -- ON YOU.

HELLO.

>> AS MUCH AS I WOULD LOVE TO,

I GOT TO FINISH THESE CORNROWS.

>> YEAH, SHE DOES.

BUT IF YOU WANT, YOU CAN RUN

AROUND THE CORNER AND GRAB US

SOME CHICKEN.

I'LL HAVE A TWO-PIECE AND A

BISCUIT.

WHAT YOU WANT?

>> I'M GOOD.

>> I GUESS THAT MEANS YOU'RE

GOOD.

>> I'LL TAKE A RAIN CHECK,

THOUGH.

>> ALL RIGHT, WELL, I WILL TAKE

THIS CHECK.

AND IF IT BOUNCES, SERIOUSLY, I

KNOW WHERE YOU LIVE.

>> MM!

>> SO, I AIN'T GET NO CHICKEN?

>> DO YOU GOT CHICKEN MONEY AND

>> DO YOU GOT CHICKEN MONEY AND A CHICKEN MAN?

A CHICKEN MAN?

>> HEY.

[ DOOR CLOSES ]

>> HEY, POOK.

>> 'SUP, GIRL?

YOU KNOW, I WAS THINKING.

INSTEAD OF STARING AT THE STARS

IN YOUR BEDROOM, WE CAN GO TO

THE OBSERVATORY AND SEE THEM FOR

REAL.

>> LISTEN, POOK, I --

>> LISTEN?

OH, HELL.

ANY TIME A FEMALE STARTS OFF A

SENTENCE WITH "LISTEN," IT'S

NEVER GOOD NEWS.

NEVER GOOD NEWS. >> HAVE A SEAT.

>> HAVE A SEAT.

ALL RIGHT.

I GOT SOMETHING TO TELL YOU, ALL

RIGHT?

SO, LISTEN.

>> OKAY.

>> BEFORE YOU CAME BACK DOWN

HERE, I KIND OF GOT MYSELF INTO

SOMETHING.

AND I MEAN, HONESTLY, I THOUGHT

IT WAS A WRAP, BUT --

>> BUT WHAT?

>> BUT...

>> YOU WANT TO DOUBLE BACK TO

THIS OTHER PERSON?

>> POOKIE...

>> YOU KNOW WHAT? I'M GOOD.

>> WILL YOU LET ME EXPLAIN?

OKAY?

BUT, HONESTLY, I DIDN'T THINK

THAT THIS WAS GONNA TURN INTO

ANYTHING, OKAY?

'CAUSE IF I DID, I WOULD HAVE

NEVER LET THINGS BETWEEN YOU

AND ME GET --

>> TASHA, LOOK, I AM GOOD.

OKAY?

>> DANG.

YOU AIN'T GOT TO BE THAT GOOD.

>> WE'LL ALWAYS BE GOOD.

>> OH, GOD.

WHY DO WE ALWAYS HAVE SUCH

WHY DO WE ALWAYS HAVE SUCH HORRIBLE TIMING?

HORRIBLE TIMING?

>> DUDE, YOU'RE MISSING THE

POINT.

THE MORAL OF THE STORY IS ONE

MEAL CAN EASILY BE MADE INTO

TWO.

>> NOBODY GIVES A DAMN ABOUT

YOUR CHEAP-ASS MORALS,

JASON PITTS.

>> WELL, MAYBE YOU SHOULD.

>> WOW.

LOOK, DAWG, I'M TRYING TO COME

CLEAN WITH YOU, MAN, ALL RIGHT?

IN REHAB, THEY TEACH US TO BE

HONEST.

ALL RIGHT?

AND I WENT TO A MEETING

YESTERDAY, AND I REALIZED

SOMETHING, JASON.

YOU HURT ME, MAN.

>> [ LAUGHS ]

ARE YOU SERIOUS?

>> HELL, YEAH, I'M SERIOUS.

YO, YOU KICKED ME WHEN I WAS

DOWN, JASON.

YOU SCREWED WITH ME.

SO, ME SCREWING WITH YOU WAS

JUST MY ATTEMPT TO GET BACK AT

YOU, MAN.

BUT IN REALITY, I REALIZED I WAS

JUST ACTING OUT BECAUSE I MISS

MY DADDY.

>> OH, WAH, WAH, WAH.

CRY ME A RIVER.

YOU SOUND LIKE BRITTANY.

[ High-pitched voice ] "NOBODY

LOVES ME.

MY PARENTS ABANDONED ME."

[ Normal voice ] YOU KNOW WHAT?

WE ALL GOT PROBLEMS, OKAY?

>> WOW.

>> UNFORTUNATELY, AT THE END OF

THE DAY, I HAVE TO DEAL WITH

BRITTANY BECAUSE I'M HER DADDY.

I'M NOT YOUR DADDY.

I'M YOUR FR--

>> MY WHAT?

>> I'M YOUR FRIEND.

>> MY FRIEND.

IS THAT SAID, JASON?

SO, INSENSITIVE, DAWG.

YO. YO, IS THAT YOUR GIRL?

>> WHERE?

>> RIGHT THERE?

OH, WAITING ON THE BUS.

>> I DON'T -- ARE YOU SURE?

'CAUSE YOU ARE AN ALCOHOLIC.

>> WOW, DAWG.

YOU'RE IN MY NICE-ASS RIDE

WITH YOUR DOGGIE BAG WHILE YOUR

GIRL RIDE THE BUS, JASON?

>> I NEVER SAID SHE WAS MY GIRL.

>> YES, YOU DID, DAWG.

YOU SAID IT, JUST LIKE YOU SAID

I WAS YOUR FRIEND.

>> I NEVER SAID I WAS YOUR

FRIEND.

>> OH, YES, YOU DID.

I HEARD YOU, JASON.

>> EMBARRASSMENT.

>> YEAH, YOU ARE.

>> WOW, TASHA, I DON'T KNOW

HOW TO TELL YOU THIS,

ESPECIALLY WITH YOU ALL

SPREAD-EAGLE IN THESE STIRRUPS

AND ALL, BUT WE REALLY

APPRECIATE THIS.

>> DON'T MENTION IT.

>> NO, SERIOUSLY.

LIKE, YOU ARE LIKE SUPER

UNSELFISH -- LIKE, PUTTING YOUR

LIFE ON HOLD TO CARRY A BABY FOR

TWO PEOPLE WHO ARE TECHNICALLY

NOT YOUR FAMILY.

>> OKAY. ALL RIGHT. SHUT UP.

>> DERWIN, STOP STRESSING HER

OUT, OKAY?

MY GOD.

>> SO, IS EVERYONE UP TO SPEED?

>> YEAH, YEAH.

I'M GOOD.

YOU KNOW, I'M A DOCTOR.

HE COULD USE A REFRESHER.

YOU KNOW, HE'S AN ATHLETE.

>> WELL, WE'VE HARVESTED

MELANIE'S EGGS, AND WE'VE

FERTILIZED THEM WITH DERWIN'S

ATHLETIC SPERM.

SO, NOW WE HAVE A VIABLE EMBRYO.

WE WILL NOW INSERT THAT EMBRYO

INTO TASHA'S UTERUS.

HOPEFULLY IT WILL GRAB ONTO

THE UTERINE WALL AND MAKE A

HAPPY HOME THERE FOR THE NEXT

NINE MONTHS.

>> NINE MONTHS?

DAMN, THAT'S A MINUTE.

>> WELL, BASED ON THE TESTS

WE'VE DONE, I DON'T SEE ANY

REASON WHY THIS SHOULDN'T BE A

SUCCESSFUL IMPLANTATION.

BUT, OF COURSE, ONLY TIME WILL

TELL.

>> THANK YOU SO MUCH, TASHA, FOR

GIVING ME EVERYTHING I EVER

GIVING ME EVERYTHING I EVER WANTED.

WANTED.

[ LAUGHS ]

>> SO, DID YOU NEED ME TO STEP

OUT?

I MEAN, DO YOU DID YOU NEED TO

SHAVE ANYTHING?

[ CELLPHONE RINGS ]

>> OH, I'M SORRY.

>> OH, I'M SORRY. EXCUSE ME.

EXCUSE ME.

EXCUSE ME. >> IS EVERYTHING OKAY?

>> IS EVERYTHING OKAY?

>> IS EVERYTHING OKAY? >> YEAH.

>> YEAH.

I'M SORRY.

Y'ALL, I CAN'T DO THIS.

>> WHAT?

>> I CAN'T, OKAY?

FOR ONCE IN MY LIFE, I GOT TO

CHOOSE MY DAMN SELF, ALL RIGHT?

I'M SORRY.

I'M SORRY. [ DOOR OPENS, CLOSES ]

[ DOOR OPENS, CLOSES ]

>> YOU KNOW YOU DIDN'T HAVE TO

DO THIS, RIGHT?

>> WELL, YOU KNOW, AFTER YOU

FLAKED ON ME YESTERDAY, I HAD TO

PULL OUT THE OLD "BROUGHT THIS

CITY A CHAMPIONSHIP CARD" TO GET

THEM TO DELIVER.

NO BIG DEAL.

>> WHAT YOU GONNA DO WHEN THAT

CARD IS DECLINED?

>> EXCUSE ME?

>> NOTHIN'.

>> STINKER.

>> [ LAUGHS ] YOU STINKER.

>> OH, I GOT YOU A LITTLE

SOMETHING.

>> WHAT? WHY?

>> JUST THINK OF IT AS A PERK

FOR PAYING YOUR BALANCE IN FULL.

DON'T FREAK OUT.

NOW, DON'T FREAK OUT.

IT'S NOT -- JUST OPEN IT.

>> OKAY.

JASON.

>> THOSE, MY LADY, ARE THE KEYS

TO YOUR VERY OWN

CERTIFIED, "PREOWNED BY THE MAN

WHO BROUGHT THE CITY A

CHAMPIONSHIP" '04 HYBRID.

CHAMPIONSHIP" '04 HYBRID. HEY-OH. [ LAUGHS ]

HEY-OH. [ LAUGHS ]

IT'S ONLY GOT 90,000 MILES ON

IT.

NOT TOO SHABBY.

>> I DON'T KNOW WHAT TO SAY.

>> YOU DON'T HAVE TO SAY

ANYTHING.

JUST KISS THE RING, GIRL.

>> AS TEMPTING AS BOTH OF THOSE

MAY SOUND, I CAN'T ACCEPT EITHER

ONE.

>> WHY? WHAT'S THE PROBLEM?

WHAT?

OH, WOULD YOU RATHER HAVE IT

IN WHITE, SITTING ON CHROME?

>> BABY, IT'S NOT THE COLOR.

ALTHOUGH IT WOULD LOOK GOOD IN

WHITE AND ON CHROME.

>> THEN WHAT? IS IT THE GAS?

IT'S A HYBRID.

I'LL GET YOU ONE OF THOSE

PREPAID GAS CARDS.

THE FUELING STATION'S A PROUD

SPONSOR OF THE PITTS STOP.

>> SERIOUSLY, IT'S REALLY SWEET.

IT'S JUST THAT I'M GOOD WITH MY

BUS PASS.

>> OKAY, [ LAUGHS ]

WHAT IS IT WITH YOU AND THE

DAMN BUS?

>> WHAT'S WRONG WITH THE BUS,

JASON?

>> OH, I DON'T KNOW.

IT'S DISGUSTING. IT'S DANGEROUS.

IT SMELLS LIKE ROTTEN BROCCOLI

SAUTéED IN PEE.

>> HAVE YOU EVER BEEN ON A BUS?

>> I'VE SEEN "SPEED," AND

"SPEED 2."

I DIDN'T GET ON THE BUS,

BUT WHO DID?

>> I KNOW THIS JASON.

I KNOW THIS JASON.

>> HERE WE GO.

>> THIS IS THE SAME JASON

THAT DIDN'T WANT ME TO MEET HIS

PEOPLES.

>> UM, IF BY "PEOPLES" YOU

MEAN MY --

>> DON'T INTERRUPT ME!

YOU ARE EMBARRASSED BECAUSE I

RIDE THE BUS.

>> HELL, YEAH, I'M EMBARRASSED

THAT YOU RIDE THE BUS.

IT'S THE BUS.

>> AND?

>> AND I BROUGHT THE CITY A

CHAMPIONSHIP.

>> WHO CARES?

>> WHO -- HOW ABOUT EVERYBODY IN

SAN DIEGO?

HOW ABOUT THAT, MISSY? TRY THAT!

>> WHO CARES IF I RIDE THE BUS?

IT'S ME.

>> I DO.

I DO.

I'M JASON PITTS, OKAY?

YOU'RE JASON PITTS' GIRL.

JASON PITTS' GIRL CANNOT RIDE

THE BUS, PERIOD.

>> OH, SO NOW YOU TRYING TO

CLAIM CHARDONNAY?

>> OKAY.

LOOK, JUST -- JUST PLEASE,

PLEASE, LET ME TAKE CARE OF YOU

FOR ONCE.

>> SO, NOW YOU TRYING TO TAKE

CARE OF CHARDONNAY?

>> IS THAT SO BAD?

>> NO.

IT'S ACTUALLY NICE.

NOW GRAB THAT BAG.

YOU CAN TAKE CARE OF MY LAUNDRY.

[ LAUGHS ]

[ LAUGHS ] >> WHAT?

>> WHAT?

>> SO, ARE WE GONNA BE SILENT

>> SO, ARE WE GONNA BE SILENT OR ARE WE GONNA TALK ABOUT IT?

OR ARE WE GONNA TALK ABOUT IT?

LOOK, MEL, I KNOW WE HIT A BUMP

IN THE ROAD.

OKAY?

AND IN ALL HONESTY, I WASN'T ALL

THAT SOLD ON THE WHOLE IVF

THING, ANYWAY.

NOT TO SOUND LIKE AN

IGNORANT COUNTRY BOY, BUT

WHAT DOES TASHA SAY?

"THAT'S A WHITE-PEOPLE MESS."

IT'S A RICH WHITE-PEOPLE MESS.

>> IT DOESN'T MATTER, DERWIN.

I'M DONE.

>> HEY. COME ON, BABY.

DON'T TALK LIKE THAT.

>> TRUTH MOMENT?

>> ABSOLUTELY. LET'S DO IT.

>> I'M NOT HAPPY, DERWIN.

>> I KNOW.

OKAY? BUT WE'LL WORK IT OUT.

ALL RIGHT?

I THINK THAT WE SHOULD LOOK BACK

INTO THE ADOPTION THING AGAIN.

I MEAN, THERE'S SO MANY KIDS OUT

THERE WHO CAN USE A GOOD HOME.

>> NO, DERWIN.

I'M NOT HAPPY WITH MY LIFE.

I'VE BEEN THINKING ABOUT IT FOR

A WHILE NOW, AND IT JUST

CRYSTALLIZED.

I FEEL LIKE A PART OF ME HAS

BEEN MISSING EVER SINCE I TURNED

DOWN JOHNS HOPKINS.

>> [ SIGHS ]

ARE YOU SERIOUS?

WE'RE BACK THERE AGAIN, MELANIE?

>> LOOK, DERWIN, I KNOW YOU

DON'T WANT TO HEAR ABOUT THIS,

BUT IT'S THE TRUTH.

I'VE BEEN SEARCHING FOR

SOMETHING TO FILL THIS VOID

EVER SINCE.

FIRST IT WAS THE SUNBEAMS.

THEN IT WAS TRYING TO MANAGE

YOUR CAREER, AND NOW IT'S THE

BABY.

BABY. [ SIGHS ]

[ SIGHS ]

I FEEL EMPTY, DERWIN.

>> HEY, LISTEN.

YOU'VE HAD -- IT'S OKAY.

YOU HAD A LONG, CRAZY DAY.

AND IT'S ALL RIGHT TO FEEL

DEFEATED, OKAY?

LISTEN, GO UPSTAIRS, RUN

YOURSELF A WARM BATH, AND I'LL

COME UP, BRING YOU WINE.

>> I'M SORRY.

>> IT'S OKAY, SWEETHEART.

IT'S OKAY.

IT'S OKAY.

I'LL BRING YOU SOME WINE.

ALL RIGHT?

IT'S GONNA BE ALL RIGHT.

I PROMISE YOU IT'S GONNA LOOK

ALL BETTER TOMORROW MORNING.

>> OKAY.

>> OKAY. >> ALL RIGHT.

>> ALL RIGHT.

>> REAL CUTE.

BABY, WHY THE HELL YOU GOT ON

SUNGLASSES?

IT'S DARK TIME OUTSIDE.

>> DARK TIME? REALLY?

>> CAN YOU PLEASE TAKE THEM

OFF?

THEY'RE EMBARRASSING ME.

>> OH, I'M SORRY.

YEAH, THAT'S WHAT'S EMBARRASSING

ABOUT THIS MOMENT.

YOU SMELL THAT?

ESSENCE OF BUM.

>> HMM.

>> CAN I PLEASE JUST PLEASE GET

YOU A USED WASHER AND DRYER?

>> AND PUT IT WHERE?

>> OH, YEAH. I FORGOT YOU LIVED

IN A RAISIN BOX.

>> A FLY, AMAZINGLY DECORATED

RAISIN BOX, OKAY?

>> IS IT?

>> YES.

>> OH, OKAY.

>> OH, I GET THAT!

YES!

>> EXCUSE ME?

>> YOU NEVER PLAYED "I GET

THAT"?

>> UM, NO.

>> OH, MY GOD.

OKAY, LOOK.

YOU FLIP THROUGH THE MAGAZINE,

AND YOU GET THINGS BEFORE YOUR

FRIENDS.

>> SOUNDS LIKE A GOOD TIME.

>> OH, IT IS.

OH, I GET THAT!

I GET THAT!

>> OKAY, YOU KNOW, YOU REALLY

DON'T GET THAT, RIGHT?

>> WELL, THAT'S NOT THE POINT.

[ GASPS ] I GET THAT!

YES.

>> GOD, I LOVE YOU.

>> WHAT DID YOU SAY?

>> WHAT DID YOU SAY? >> I GET THAT?

>> I GET THAT?

>> POOKIE!

POOKIE!

[ WHISTLING ]

POOKIE!

>> KEEP IT DOWN!

YOU KNOW I LIKE TO KEEP A LOW

PROFILE.

>> LOOK, BUMP THAT.

I'M READY TO LIVE OUT LOUD,

BABY.

>> WHAT YOU MEAN?

>> FOR ONCE IN MY LIFE, I'VE

DECIDED TO CHOOSE MYSELF, WHICH

MEANS I CHOOSE YOU, POOKIE.

>> YEAH, WHAT ABOUT YOUR

OTHER --

>> LOOK, AIN'T NOBODY ELSE BUT

YOU, BABY.

>> YOU SURE?

>> WHAT DO YOU THINK?

>> WHAT DO YOU THINK? >> ♪

>> ♪

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