Original subtitles

* *

He is a two-time Emmy winner,

has hosted the Emmys and Oscars.

Uh, he's a author of a children's book,

and the host of his late-night talk show

for nearly 20 years.

Ladies and gentlemen, I'm talking about my good friend,

Jimmy Kimmel.

Come on, Jimmy. How are you?

-Uh, hi. How are you? -How you doing, big guy?

Good. I'm a three-time Emmy winner, though.

I just want to make that clear.

You know, like, we can't just...

-Three times? -Yeah, three times, you know?

What did they say in there?

-You said two, but it's okay. -They said two?

Yeah. Have they taken one away and I don't know about it?

I don't know, man. And, you know, listen,

that's the consequence of doing this show how I do it.

-There's no prep. -That's right.

-Yeah. Yes. -There's no prep, Jimmy.

You rely on Wikipedia, and that's where things go south.

Uh, it should be three, though.

-If it said two, it's not. -It's okay. It's fine. It's...

I can tell it's not, though.

Yeah, no, it's fine. It's-it's okay.

-Nah, it's not. -You know, I'll get over it.

It's not. I can tell it's not.

Why are all the wine bottles empty?

What's going on? Are you not...

Do you not trust your staff? Is that what's happening here?

We-we have a problem here at "Hart to Heart."

-You do, yeah. -Yes, we-we...

Can I tell you, I have that--

You know, you know, in the back of my show

where the music is and they have that bar set up?

All the bottles are full of colored water

because our staff was getting drunk in the day.

-Wh-While taping the show? -While taping the show, yeah.

-Well, that's a good time. -Yeah.

That's why I had such a good time every time I came on.

-That's exactly what it was. -Maybe that's what it was.

The staff was always amazing, by the way.

-(laughs) -Jimmy, I like wine.

-Do you want to have a glass of wine? -I like wine, too, yeah.

-Okay, I got a somm. -All right.

I have a somm-sommeli-- sommelier.

And d-did you shorten it to "somm"?

Because I have trouble pronouncing

-the word consistently. -(laughs)

-Evening, gentlemen. -How are you?

Mr. Kimmel, Mr. Hart.

Hey, Champ. How you doing, man?

Very well.

Oh, my God, what are we drinking today?

Spring Mountain. Napa Valley.

2017 Cabernet Sauvignon.

-Not a Cabernet Sauvignon. -Yes, indeed.

-See that, Jimmy? -That's a good one?

-Yes, man, that's a good one, man. -All right.

-You know, this is what I do, man. -All right.

Great conversations happen over good wine.

That's true.

People get relaxed. People get loose.

-I'm going to get loose, yeah. -This feels so good, too, by the way.

-Just pour it right into my mouth. -(DLynn chuckles)

These are big gl-- These glasses are bigger than you are.

Well, that's-- I mean, that's the whole thing.

I have a Napoleon complex.

-Thank you. -Thank you, D. -Gentlemen, enjoy.

-Appreciate you, man. Thank you. -Appreciate it. Salud.

-Cheers. -Salud to you.

Uh... Jimmy, all right, two questions for you.

-Starting off, right? -Yep.

Um, I know Jimmy Kimmel.

I have been around you for years now.

I can honestly say I'm so comfortable

not only when I come on your show but around you in general.

We have a great relationship, great rapport.

But this is opportunity for me to get to know more,

uh, understand more,

and ask good questions,

just things that I really want to know the answers to.

-Okay. -And I think that if done right,

then we have a great yin and yang,

-a good back-and-forth. -All right.

Um, let's go to before the talk show,

before you get there.

-Let's go back to the early days, right? -Okay.

Um, from my understanding, you started off--

and this is without radio-- I mean, that's without, like,

true research, but radio was your thing.

Yeah. I was a disc jockey, yeah.

A disc jockey for how long?

12 years. Professionally 12 years.

And then, for free, I did it for about 5 years before that.

Coming out-- But coming out of college, that was the want?

Coming out of high school, I actually did.

I did-- I was working at a clothing store in Las Vegas,

and there was a guy who I worked with

who worked at the college radio station.

He thought I was funny.

He said, "You should be on the radio."

And I was like, "Hey, I'd like to be on the radio."

So he introduced me to his boss,

and the guy said, "Yeah, okay, yeah.

"We want you to do a show on Sunday night

"for a half an hour, and what we want you to do is

"find local celebrities or whatever

and make fun of them." And I thought,

"Well, that would-- that would be great for me."

So, I went through the yellow pages,

and I just started looking for someone I could interview,

and the first guy I found was a guy who billed himself

as the hair stylist to the stars,

and so I call him up.

I say, "I see you're hair stylist to the stars.

"I'd love to interview about

some of the stars and their hair."

And he said, "Great." So he came down,

and it turned out the only star that he'd--

whose hair he'd ever cut was John Davidson

from, like, "Real People." Do you remember that guy?

(laughing): No.

Or "That's Incredible!" One of those two shows.

And he had a-- this guy actually was

a talk show host, John Davidson.

He's one of those talk-show hosts

who sings in every show, you know.

And he had a big patch of white hair.

And so I think we talked about that patch of white hair

for, like, 20 minutes.

And then I went home--

drove home in my mom's station wagon.

And when I got home, my mom and dad

and my aunt were in the kitchen,

and they'd listened to the show,

and they were so excited and I was just hooked on it.

-You fell-- That's when you fell in love? -Yeah, I was like, "Wow."

You saw the reaction from the ones that you were closest to,

and it was like, "Okay, this is great."

And also, growing up in a loud Italian house,

you don't-- people don't listen to you,

so your voice gets lost in the-- in the cacophony.

So I was just excited to have somebody listening to me.

Now, the want now for radio...

Uh, of course, like you said, you ended up doing it.

You did it for 12 years.

Was the goal to be the best in that profession

and somehow you found yourself doing more unexpectedly?

Or was there always the goal of, "This is gonna act

as a transition to get me to the other thing?"

I never thought of it as a transition.

I did a-- When I was working in Seattle,

I worked at a radio station up there,

and they put us on TV.

It was one of these deals

where they get the local deejays to host a movie.

And the movie was "Nightmare on Elm Street,"

and my partner on the air, my partner Kent and I,

we hosted it, and I still have the VHS tape.

And I remember looking at it and analyzing the tape

because I am very critical of myself.

-Mm-hmm. -And thinking, like,

"All right, well, you're bad on TV.

You'll never be on TV, and so forget that."

A-And I was bad. I mean, it was-- I was...

-I was like... -It made your back stiff.

I was, uh, like a mannequin.

And, um, I just wanted to be on the radio.

And it just so happened that

I was on the radio in L.A. at KROQ,

and people who had TV shows would hear me,

and then I'd get a call every once in a while saying,

"Hey, will you come audition for this

or host this for us," and whatever.

-And that's... that's how it happened. -That's how it happened.

So-so how many places did you springboard from that?

Like, you just said Seattle.

-Where were the different places you were at? -I went from Vegas to Phoenix,

to Seattle back to Phoenix,

to Tampa, to Palm Springs,

to Tucson, and then to L.A.

Goddamn.

All on radio.

Fired most of those jobs.

-Wow. -Yeah.

-Why? -Um...

I guess the biggest reason was I had no--

I was not diplomatic in any way.

I really felt like I was more talented and smarter

than any of the people that worked at the radio station,

-and I wasn't listening to them. -Ah.

And, uh, it sounds kind of cool,

but, in a way, it wasn't.

-I could see why they didn't want me around. -Mm-hmm.

I, uh, like, I would...

I would get, like-- I mean, I'd start a job,

and my first act at the job would be to cut out naked bodies

of, like, uh, two men in the shower

and then put the general manager

and the program director's heads on them,

and then put it on the cover of the company newsletter.

(laughs): And-and then they would get mad.

And I wouldn't understand why anyone was mad.

I was like, "What? This is funny.

What-what are you mad about?"

You always pushed the envelope.

Yeah, but in a stupid way.

In a way that had nothing to do with being on air.

-It-- I would annoy them in their offices. -Okay.

I would-- Well, and sometimes it was on air.

But, like, you know, sometimes I'd tape our meetings

with our boss, and, uh, and he didn't know I was taping them,

and then I'd play them back on the air the next day

-and make fun of him and that kind of stuff. -Oh, wow.

What was the first big break after radio?

Um, the big break for me was...

It was, uh, working at-- getting a job at KROQ in L.A.,

which, you know, it was the biggest

-and best radio station in the country, really. -Mm-hmm.

I was very fortunate because I was working in Tucson,

and things-- I knew I was gonna get fired there.

Uh, things were headed in that direction.

You-- After a while, you start to recognize the pattern.

-Yeah, you can sense it. Oh, here it comes. -They stop yelling at you.

That's what happens. Like, they stop yell--

Like, all of a sudden you're like,

"Ah, I haven't been dragged in the office in a while."

-Hmm. -And-and...

So they stopped yelling at me,

and I knew it was happening.

-(laughs) -And I also,

I knew the program director.

He's a guy I'd worked with at another radio station,

um, when I was just, uh, basically an intern,

unpaid intern.

And I knew him a little bit.

I knew he thought I was funny.

And I went to, uh, a wedding in Cleveland,

and we hung out for, like, four days.

And afterwards he's like,

"Oh, you're very funny.

"You know, maybe-- You know, maybe you could come be

on the morning show in L.A." And I was like...

Uh, I just went home and basically started packing.

In fact, I moved to L.A.

without officially being offered the job,

and I showed up at the radio sta--

(chuckling): I'm like, "I moved here."

They were like, "You did?"

I said, "Yeah. I'm here."

Uh, you know, and they said, "Uh, okay.

Well, um, we got to figure this out."

And then, luckily, we figured it out.

How long did it take?

Uh, it took about three weeks,

so three very nerve-racking weeks.

Of you just being in...

The-the ambition

and-and ignorance at the same time

of saying, "I'm just gonna go."

They wouldn't give me an answer.

They seemed like they wanted to hire me,

and-- but they just wouldn't pull the trigger.

And so my best friend, Cleto,

who's now the bandleader on my TV show

was living here in L.A.,

and I just said, uh, "Cleto, I'm coming out.

I'm gonna leave the family in Tucson until I get this job."

And, uh, I-I came out and lived with him,

and I got the job and then they moved out.

And, uh, I've been in L.A. since. That was '94.

* *

* *

After getting on KROQ,

what was the thing that-that kind of transitioned you

to the world of TV?

The thing that really transitioned me was

a show called "Win Ben Stein's Money."

It was a game show on Comedy Central.

I know what it is, mm-hmm.

And I was working at-- I was just--

You know, I'd do, like, part-time jobs,

'cause I wasn't making any money at KROQ.

And I'd do, like, part-time writing jobs.

I was writing for this game show.

-You know who Fred Silverman is? -I know who Fred Silverman is.

Fred-- Fred is... you know, he ran--

-This is the only guy who ran ABC, NBC, and CBS. -Mm-hmm. Mm-hmm.

And I know the story sounds made-up, but it's true.

I was just, like, a writer on this dumb game show

that was never gonna get picked up.

I was doing it for money.

And they asked me to be the host in the run-throughs.

And so I was the run-through host,

and I was doing it for, like, a week,

and then Fred showed up, and he was this--

You know, he always had a suit and a big open collar

and a glass of iced tea in his hand with a napkin.

Always. And Fred sits down,

and we're gonna show him what we've come up with.

And so we run through the game show,

and, um, he goes, "Cancel the host auditions.

This kid is the host."

And I was like, "I am?"

And even the producer of the show was like, "No, you're not."

(laughs): And... And, uh--

But Fred was adamant that I would be the host.

And we did a run-through of the show for a bunch of buyers,

and they didn't pick the show up,

but I got a couple of offers after the run-through.

One from a guy named Michael Davies,

who worked at ABC

and who later went on to do "Who Wants to Be a Millionaire."

He was the producer of that show.

And he brought me in, and he said, um,

"I got this show. It's called 'Win Ben Stein's Money.'"

And I said, "That sounds kind of good."

-And he told me who Ben Stein was, and... -Mm-hmm.

Ben and I, in a conference room,

did a rehearsal together, and we had good chemistry, and...

and that was that, we were on Comedy Central.

So, how long are you on... how long are you doing this show?

I did that show for...

um, I think, five seasons,

-Mm-hmm. -and then, um, Adam Carolla and I

came up with an idea for "The Man Show."

-Mm-hmm. -Originally, the show was...

-At ABC. -sold to ABC, if you can imagine that.

-Doesn't seem like it would have lived there, but, uh, okay. -No.

And it didn't. And, in fact, we made the pilot,

and they were mortified.

But no one ever told us. Up until...

You know how it works with the upfront.

This happened to you once. I remember this.

They don't tell you till, like, the night before

whether your show got picked up or not.

I mean, do you... You do know my story.

I was in the middle of your story.

-Oh, my God. -I was hosting the upfronts

when they were trying to decide

whether or not to put your show on the air.

Are you... are you serious?

I'm totally serious.

So, for everybody watching,

what me and Jimmy are now talking about is,

there's a legendary story attached to my name

of how my TV show, "The Big House,"

got canceled, right?

And... Which was a large opportunity for me.

As a matter of fact, Jimmy,

I came on your show to promote.

I remember my biggest thing that I did on the Jimmy Kimmel show,

I, like, put my feet up on the table.

But there was, like, I had, like, a confidence or whatever,

but it was after I'd been through so much.

That upfront, when they canceled my show,

the way that they canceled it,

I promise you, it was supposed to crush me.

-It was supposed to body me. -Mm-hmm.

Nobody warned me. Nobody told me nothing.

Nobody said anything. It was just...

I was backstage, Jimmy-- I'm about to walk onto the stage.

I'll tell you one thing.

They were... they were split

on whether they were gonna pick your show up.

It wasn't a consensus.

No one at ABC planned to pick our show up.

There was no chance. They knew months beforehand that

-it was not gonna get picked up. -And they just had you down there?

But then it turned out, after we made the pilot,

a bunch of cable networks wanted to put it on.

-And then, at that, you get the opportunity. -And Comedy Central, they said

"We'll give you 22 episodes, we'll..."

You know, whatever and whatever. We're like, "Okay, I guess so."

At the height, how big was "The Man Show"?

It was pretty big. It was, you know,

when you look at the ratings, it's, like, you know, compared,

now it would be the number one show on television.

But, you know, uh, it was pretty popular.

Only "South Park," I think, was more popular at the time.

You know, you guys were, were so strong, so strong back then.

Now, of course, in the times today,

I mean, "The Man Show" could've never lived within our time.

-Not on a commercial network, probably, yeah. -No. No.

But I think it... I think there's definitely an appetite

for that, um, lack of political...

that brazen lack of political correctness.

-Which is missing. Yes. -Yeah, yeah.

But then we learned from, um, looking at our studio audience

and watching them evolve, and what used to happen--

We'd get, like, hundreds of people showing up

on tape days, tailgating outside our studio,

and then they'd come in drunk off their asses,

and it was, like, it was, it was a lot,

and it became, like, hard to do the show.

In fact, we quit that show.

-We... we said, "You know what? We're... -You're serious?

-We are done doing this show." -I didn't know that.

It was at its most popular, and we were just tired

of kind of, uh, this just, like, drunken audience

that laughed at everything, and it was...

it just wasn't fun.

It was, like, like, "Oh, I don't like you guys."

How long were you guys doing it at this point?

We did, um, almost a hundred episodes.

-Damn. -Four seasons.

Wow. I did not know that you guys walked away from the show.

We did. And then they brought in a couple other guys.

-Actually, Joe Rogan and Doug Stanhope came in -Mm-hmm.

and hosted the show, um, the fifth season.

When you made the decision to leave,

how long was it before the ABC thing happened?

It was a couple of months later.

In fact, had the ABC thing not happened,

I'm sure Comedy Central would have, um,

would have made sure we stayed there

and kept doing the show.

But ABC-- and it was almost like a sports deal--

ABC traded Comedy Central

a million dollars in promotion for me. So...

'Cause Comedy Central's like, "We have him under contract.

"He's," you know, "he's not going anywhere."

And, um, ABC said, "All right, well, what do you want?"

And so they made a couple of deals.

They picked up a whole show from the guys who produced our show

and gave a million dollars in promotion to ABC

to get me out of my contract.

* *

* *

At this point, though, you know,

the world of success is different.

Of course, money is different.

Your family's a little more secure.

-A lot more secure. -A lot more, yeah, yeah.

Not a little more, a lot more secure.

Um, you know, is there any inkling of,

"Wow, this is now my career, and the days and, you know,

"the old... of me doing radio

"and-and really getting my chops together, wow, okay,

it could have been for this thing"?

I'm trying to find if there was ever a-a mental click

of, "I can be the shit at this."

Yeah. Yeah, there was.

I think it was, weirdly-- if I had to, like, isolate it--

we made this video, um, "I'm Fucking Matt Damon,"

-which became a big viral video. -(laughing)

And it changed... it changed a lot.

It-it really changed the show,

because suddenly celebrities wanted to be on it,

which they didn't before.

I mean, like, if you go... if you ever have the--

don't, by the way-- but if you ever, like, go back

and watch the early shows, like, there were times

where the guests weren't even paying attention to me.

Like, they were talking to the other guests.

It felt like every party I ever was at,

where I'd be sitting there at the desk,

and they'd be carrying on a conversation,

and I was like, "Uh, hmm, should I interject?"

Like, what... what should I do now?"

And the show was live, and it was just a mess.

And we had... sometimes we had really...

we were really scraping the bottom of the barrel

when it came to stars.

We'd have, like, the sixth most interesting person

on "Joe Millionaire" or something, you know?

Not even Joe. We were like, "All right, if we have him,

can we maybe get Joe?"

They're like, "Eh, Joe's doing 'Leno.'

Joe's, uh, Joe's not available."

But, um, it's true.

In fact, that's when I started making fun of Matt Damon,

because, at the end of a show,

we had some terrible guests, and I was standing there,

I'm wrapping up the show, and I'm standing there

with these guests-- I don't even remember who they were--

and I go, "I want to apologize to Matt Damon.

We ran out of time for him."

And I just did it to make our producer, Jason, laugh,

you know, and he was cracking up,

and, uh, then I just did it again the next night,

and then, um, I started doing it all the time

as just, you know, like,

-it's just how I closed the show. -I'm laughing...

Here's why I'm laughing, all right? There's no way...

there's no way not to be aware, like, when you say,

"Yeah, we were kind of scraping the bottom of the barrel,"

like, you know, when you're looking...

you're looking at your guests, and you're like,

-"Oh, man, all right, well, this is what we got." -Who's this?

-Yeah. -And then they're looking

at their booking at my show, going, "Who's this?"

I had Mike Tyson on the show for a week.

He was my cohost, you know?

And, uh, and I was really excited,

because Mike Tyson is, you know, he was a sports guy

-here in L.A., has been a central fig... -Mm-hmm. Mm-hmm.

You know, if you do sports comedy,

Mike Tyson, that's it.

-You know, that's as good as it gets. -Uh-huh.

And he... it was like... it was only a week,

but it seemed like we spent a year together.

It was incredible.

Like, one night, I had him sucking helium out of a balloon

and talking like he used to.

And, um, one night we had Ali Landry,

the Doritos girl, on the show. Do you remember her?

And Mike was so taken by her, he was, like, he was crazed.

He was in a... just a sexual frenzy.

And I-I remember thinking, like, "Oh, no, what's...

what do I do?" Like, what will I do if he grabs hold of her?

And I started looking around my desk.

I'm like, "All right, this phone is kind of heavy.

I'll hit him with this."

"Maybe that'll be quick enough

that I can get security to come in."

I have real... like, I have real tears, man.

This is... this is before Mike Tyson's, like,

-in "The Hangover" and stuff. -I know!

This is fresh Mike Tyson, you know?

-Yes. I'm-I'm laughing because... -One day...

I truly know that you're serious.

I love Mike Tyson, and...

I genuinely do love him as a person.

And, um, one day, my son--

I was shooting a Christmas song with Mike Tyson.

We were singing, um,

* Sleigh bells ring, are you listening? *

And the whole... the whole reason I did it

is 'cause I wanted to hear him,

uh, sing certain words in the song.

-I don't remember what it was. -Who was coming up with the bits?

-Is this you and your team? -Yeah, yeah, yeah.

-Okay, got it, got it. -We came up with it,

and he was always game for something.

And, um, we had, like, an hour or something.

You know, it was a hard-out type of situation.

And I get a call that my son is, like, misbehaving at school,

-Mm-hmm. -and I got to go to the school.

So I'm like, "Mike, I'm really sorry.

"I have to go to my son's school.

I got an issue I have to deal with."

And, uh, he's like, "Yeah, okay, go ahead. I'll wait."

So he waits, and-- oh, "glistening" was the word

I wanted to hear him sing.

(imitates Tyson): * Glithenin'. *

So, uh, I go, I pick up my son.

I bring him back to the show.

You know, we have a talk in the car.

And Mike-- I get back-- Mike's like, "Where's your son?"

I said, "Oh, he's, you know, he's out there."

He says, "You mind if I talk to him?"

I said, "Go right ahead."

And Mike sat down and, like, talked to my son,

and I kind of stood in the back so I could overhear it.

And he talked to him.

-My son was probably ten, 11 years old at the time. -Wow.

And he's like, "You know, I had problems in school.

-"But you really have to, you know, -Wow.

you have to try your hardest."

-And, like, he gave him this, like, this pep talk -Wow.

that I was just like, "Wow. We don't know this guy at all.

I mean, people don't know who this person is."

Wow. Does your son remember that?

He does, yeah. He remembers it well.

-That's huge. That's... -Yeah.

that's one of the perks that you don't know

that comes with the trade.

Every once in a while, somebody really surprises you,

and you go, "Oh, I... yeah, that's..."

And actually, it's very educational,

because it teaches you that... not just celebrities,

but you have these thoughts about people,

and they're not necessarily... accurate.

-True, yes. Yeah. -And you think you know people.

You think you can size almost anybody up when you see them,

and that's just, uh, it's ignorant.

* *

* *

When you say, like, "It's one of those moments where..."

You know, you were shocked,

and you said sometimes people shock you.

Who else has kind of blown you away, uh,

-being that you've met so many? -You know who's...?

You know who's the least like you would expect him to be--?

A couple of people.

-Johnny Knoxville... -Mm-hmm.

is, like, a great dad.

And, like, a really, like, good guy.

He sends my kids birthday presents.

He sends Christmas presents.

And they're usually crazy, like a drum set

or something to drive me crazy, but, um...

he's weirdly he's-- well, not weirdly--

-he's just a thoughtful person, -Mm-hmm.

which you don't expect from somebody who's got his penis

-tied to a kite, and, you know, -Yeah, yeah.

-electricity's going through it. -His dick is attached

to a muffler and they start the car.

-"It's gone!" -Yeah. (laughs)

No, Johnny. Johnny, be careful, man.

-Slash. You know Slash, the guitar player? -I know Slash, yeah.

When my, when my Uncle Frank died,

he wrote me a long, beautiful letter,

uh, which was totally out of the blue.

I really don't know him, um,

but he'd spent a day with my Uncle Frank on a comedy bit.

And I-- you know, I-I, you know, I know him...

surface-wise, but I don't really know him.

And, um, I was just, like...

-Shocked you... shocked you. -"Wow, that's weir-- That's crazy."

-Yeah. -It's almost like--

I don't even have a word for it, but it's like, you know--

it's one of those things where you question, like,

"Damn, I must have made a really good impression."

-And-and... -Or...

I-I look at it differently, like, "Oh, this is a...

a-a good per--" I mean, to be that,

to be that thoughtful and to have that much empathy.

And I will tell you this, and this--

and I'm sure you've had this same experience--

I would bet anything you have.

There are certain people who are so much

like you think they're going to be,

-you can't believe that, either. -Absolutely.

And for me, the number-one person is Oprah.

Because Oprah is...

-super Oprah when you meet her. -Mm-hmm.

I mean, I-I spent, I mean,

I spent my whole time on "The Man Show" making fun of Oprah.

-Mm-hmm. -Um, my ex-wife used to watch "Oprah" every day,

and then yell at me when I got home

-for things the men on the show had done. -Mm-hmm.

I was like, "What is... Why is Oprah torturing me?"

-Mm-hmm. -And then, uh,

after many years of being on the air,

Oprah agreed to do the show.

And not only did she agree to do the show.

We shot some really funny comedy bits.

And the shooting started at, like, 4:00 in the morning

-and ended at like, 11:00, that night. -Mm-hmm.

It was an all-day thing. Oprah was in my bathtub.

Oprah and I were fighting.

I mean, it was, like... It was a crazy multiple-shoot day.

And, um, you... Someone like Oprah doesn't need to do this.

-Absolutely. -And certainly doesn't need

to be wonderful throughout.

-Absolutely. -At the end of the night,

at the time at which I would've said,

"Goodbye, everybody. I'm leaving,"

you know, uh, Oprah doesn't.

She gets, um, a whole bunch of champagne,

and she gathers everyone together,

and she gives this beautiful toast,

and singles out the writers

and the director and the producer

and really makes our whole staff-- not just me...

It's easy to, you know, be nice to me--

but makes our whole staff feel special.

And we... It was like... It-it...

I was just like, "Oh, now I understand it."

-She's the Oracle. -It was almost--

I know this sounds dumb,

but it was like a religious experience in some ways.

I know. I'm not... It doesn't sound dumb.

-Yeah. -I've had an encounter with Oprah.

I've met Oprah two times, right?

Uh, one time I did an interview with Oprah for her show.

And the big thing was, she was coming to my house.

-Mm-hmm. -And you... I was like, "What?!"

The most nervous I've ever been is

-when Oprah came to my house, and... -What do you talk...?

My wife's like, "We need to redecorate!"

Same thing. It was, like... It was a big deal.

-Yeah. -It was like, "Yo, we got to get stuff.

Oprah's coming to the house. Oprah's coming."

Oprah came to my house.

There's a thing. There's a thing that some people have

where it's almost as if they light up, right?

-Like, certain people... -Mm-hmm.

...light up. I don't know what it is. I can't describe it.

There's an energy that... There's a halo or something

-that comes out of them. -Something.

-Something happens, right? -Yeah. Yup.

Oprah came in my house, and I got my-my kids--

my kids were very young at the time--

and my-my... Like, a couple of my friends were there

because I wanted to keep it small.

Oprah comes in, and we're like, "Hey, hey."

And she was like, "Hey!" And she...

When she did this, it was like fucking light...

-Mm-hmm. -...went on.

And we were all hit by it, and instantly,

we-we're engulfed into this... this thing.

And she was like, "I'm so happy to see you.

Kevin, give me a hug. Oh, my God."

She was like, "It's just... Let me get...

I want to just hug you. I want to hug you."

She kept hugging me. She hugs my wife.

She sees my baby. She's pinching cheeks.

She's doing everything that you would not expect her to do.

-Right. -Her team is there.

And we sit, and we're doing this interview, and Oprah...

Here's when I knew, like,

Oprah's just a different level of big.

She was like, "Okay, guys, we're going to do this.

Make sure that the phones and stuff are off."

You see people making sure the phones are off.

And she was like, "Are your house phones...

-uh, you know, are-are they on?" -Smart.

And I was like, "Yeah."

She was like, "Can you disconnect the house phones?"

"Absolutely, Oprah." We're... (laughs)

We're pulling out the plugs for the house phones.

There's nothing. Oprah's at our house.

Nobody has access to us, 'cause that's how Oprah wants it.

We do this interview, and we get done,

and Oprah gives me, like, this nice, heartfelt conversation.

She gave me, like, a good 15-minute conversation about,

"You're young. You got an opportunity.

You-you seize the moment."

Like, some-some shit that she didn't have to say.

-Right. -And it stuck with me.

Until this day, it stuck with me.

Like, I remember my moment with Oprah.

So I know exactly what you're talking about...

-Yeah. -...when you say her toast

and how she singled it out,

because she doesn't have to take the time.

She doesn't have to. Um, she...

And it's almost unfair to her to expect her to be this person,

this, like, kind of magical person.

-And I'm sure it's a burden for her in a lot of ways. -Mm.

But, um, she... she gets it, and she does it.

And-and as you said, not just for the star of the sh...

-the production, but everybody around. -Mm-hmm.

* *

* *

I-I want to say something else, man, and I just want to,

you know, take a second to give you your flowers...

-Oh? -...you know, while you're here.

-I'm-I'm in person with you. -Weed?

-Not weed. Not-not weed. -Oh. Oh. Oh.

-(laughs) -But if you want weed, I-I can...

Here at "Hart to Heart"...

You have a sommelier for that, too?

Yes, I have a sommelier that can bring it in.

Um, I-I can say that...

you've taken your platform, right,

and you've used your platform for...

for everything that is important to you.

It's not something that you've shied away from.

Whether it be political, personal, um, w-whatever,

you have used that show and the audience that has embraced you

to speak what you feel people need to hear.

And I commend that because it's very easy to get caught up

in the success of what you have,

and have the mindset of,

"I don't ever want to jeopardize it."

-Well, I appreciate that. -It... Well, I mean it.

I think that we... You know, I think that...

I just... I know what's right, and I know what's wrong.

-Mm-hmm. -And I... As I-I've become older

and wiser, I guess, um, I just feel like

I have no choice but to say what I believe to be true,

even if it upsets, um...

even if it means my ratings are lower

-or whatever, you know? -Mm-hmm. Mm-hmm.

And I don't think of it as,

like, any kind of courageous act.

I just don't feel like I have a choice.

-Mm-hmm. Mm-hmm. -That's... I...

I would not be able to sleep if I didn't talk about that.

-Mm-hmm. -And we just see these...

all these terrible things happening.

And, you know, I wish people could just...

And what I try to do is to speak to people

in a way that people speak to each other.

Because, you know, I don't have any observations

that are particularly original,

but I do have a relationship with my audience,

and I have been on TV for a very long time now.

And so there are people who trust me, and there are people

who don't have their minds made up about something or other.

And I... You know, just like... like, with the police.

Like, I mean, you just say to a white person,

like, "How would you feel?"

I mean, listen, death...

You know, shooting and whatever-- that's...

These are the extreme and most horrible examples.

But even just make it a small thing.

How would you feel if you got pulled over for no reason?

How would that make you feel?

That would make you r... mad, wouldn't it?

I mean, wouldn't that make you mad?

And I think most people would say, like,

"Yeah, yeah, that would make me mad if I got pulled over

because I was born a different color."

And-and that's th...

I think that's, like, the way

-to talk to people, you know? -Mm-hmm.

I-I think people get caught up in-in this nonsense.

You know, "Like, well, you shouldn't... you shouldn't run."

Like, "You shouldn't run? What do you mean, you shouldn't run?

"You're not... you're not the person that...

-You've never been targeted. You don't know..." -Mm-hmm.

Sometimes maybe you feel like you need to run

-because you're scared. We... -Mm-hmm. Mm-hmm.

Just 'cause we're not scared, we don't understand.

-Mm-hmm. -"Why would you...

why would try to get back in the car and run?"

-"Because I'm scared, that's why." -Mm-hmm.

"And I have reason to be, because of the evidence,

because of things that really happened to me."

And, uh, you know, if-if...

It's just a...

It-It's, um...

If everybody would just try to understand each other--

and, by the way, I put myself in that category, too--

you know, try to understand these people

that I make fun of or castigate or whatever. We...

If we all did it a little more, it would help us,

-because what a horrible place we're in now, you know? -Mm-hmm.

-We can't agree on anything. -But what you... what you just did

is what I'm talking about.

Like, that's what I mean I witness you do on your show.

It's not that the things that you're saying are so profound.

You're simplifying a feeling, and you're trying

to just simply paint a picture to your audience

to make your audience see different perspectives

and different sides.

To me, it has come off heartfelt,

it's come off courageous, and I think it's dope as hell

that you use that platform to do so,

knowing that the consequences could be, you know,

-divisive, ratings, et cetera. -Well, I appreciate it.

And-and, by the way, I do feel like I should say,

like, I do feel like a lot of my colleagues in late night

-do the same thing and do it really well. -Mm-hmm. Mm-hmm.

And, you know, I do feel like one of the things

that helps keep me sane

when you see all these terrible things happening

is knowing that I can then go on TV and say,

-"Hey, uh, this is not right." And maybe we should do this. -Mm-hmm.

And I do think that, for me, and for--

my wife says the same thing, you know?

It's-it's, like, it's... it's an outlet, uh,

-to be able to speak about this stuff. -Absolutely.

You just got finished talking about your colleagues.

Um, the relationships between the guys of late night today,

how are they?

Are you guys... is there an amazing synergy

that you guys have?

Is there a relationship between you, or...

-I despise them all. No. -You despise...

Um, I know it's boring,

but I really like every one of those guys.

Why do you think it's boring? It's not.

-I think people need to hear it. -It's more fun when people fight.

But I think there's also a really different reason

why we aren't, um, as at each other's throats

as Jay and Dave were.

And I think it's because everything is splintered now,

and so... and because, also, people watch our shows

on YouTube, mostly.

-Mm-hmm. -It's not like you have to choose.

You know, in the old days, you just were like, "All right,

I have to watch either David Letterman or Jay Leno."

And, you know, "They're both on at 11:30,

-and I'm gonna have to pick one of them." -Mm-hmm.

And it's not like that now.

Like, in fact, a lot of people will sit there

and they watch our show, the monologue,

and Colbert and Seth Meyers and Jimmy Fallon and James Corden,

you know, like, and they watch all the stuff

'cause they just like late-night television.

I like that. I mean, more importantly,

I just like that you can say that.

People need to hear it, because it's not the times of old.

And also, I love talking to those guys.

-Mm-hmm. -Because there are only, like, eight people

that have our job, you know?

Like, uh, I went to dinner one night with Seth Meyers,

and we just, we talked for, like, four hours straight,

and it was one of the best conversations I've ever had.

-Seth's a good dude, though. -Because we just motored through all of it.

Seth is a good dude, though.

-Yeah, for sure. -I like Seth a lot.

Do you guys share guests? "Hey, man,

"you don't want to get X, Y, and Z.

Ugh! Pulling teeth."

-Um... -"Ugh, God. Hey, have you had...?"

-That happens sometimes. Yeah. -"Don't do it. Don't do it.

It's not the best. I'm telling you now."

It's less of a warning, usually, and more of a commiseration.

-You know? -Okay.

That we've already both experienced it.

There are definitely... there's definitely that, for sure.

* *

* *

What's the world of a workday now?

How-how-how, uh, how compact is it?

How much... how much of a science

do you now have it down to?

I have every minute accounted for, and I def...

You know, I wake up, I start reading the news.

At 9:15, I get a, like, 40 pages of ideas and material.

I whittle it down to, like, six pages.

I send it back to the writers.

You go through it? You go through the 40 pages?

-I read every joke. I read every bit. -Wow.

I rewrite things. I send them back.

And then, from a two-hour period,

from 1:30 to 3:30, I revise the whole monologue,

and then, um, hand it to the teleprompter guy.

And at, uh, 4:30, off we go.

-So that's the world of work for Jimmy? -Yeah.

What's the world of being a father, a husband?

World of being father is, I walk in the door at around 6:00.

My kids tackle me.

They don't even let me put my backpack down.

Uh, we, uh, talk about the day.

I try to get them to talk about the day.

Uh, give them a bath. We tell stor...

Every night, I have to... my son makes me, he says,

"Will you lay with me for two minutes?" he says,

and then I have to, you know, I tell him a story every night,

and I lay with him, and, uh, he's almost four years old.

-Wow. -And, uh, I tell him some ridiculous story.

And now they want to hear... there's a story

that they want me to tell about, it's called "The Penis Story."

It's about my Spanish teacher in high school,

who, um, he prepared a quiz,

he wrote it all out on the chalkboard,

and he pulled the map down, and, um, somebody in our class

went and erased all the questions

and drew a big penis on the thing.

-And they love the story. -I made the mistake of telling my daughter the story,

-It's a bit. -and she makes me tell it.

-I have to tell it three times in a row. -It's a bit. Yes.

-Every night I have to tell this story. -Yes.

-She laughs every time. -And I act it out. I use the blinds to...

act it out, and they laugh hysterically.

They love it.

Are you planning on taking time for you?

-Um, one day. Yeah, one day. -Yeah. Yeah.

I don't, I don't have a...

I have very, very little free time.

Is there a goal with a number? You're at 20 years, right?

-Is there a goal with a number? -Yeah, 20 seems like a...

20 seems like a good... good amount of years.

-Yeah. -You know, I mean,

I don't know for sure what I'll do,

but I get excited about things, and I go,

"Oh, yeah, I want to do that, too."

And, um, I mean, I approach--

I know you probably can't identify this,

because you're not a glutton like I am--

I approach it the same way I approach a meal.

I go to a restaurant, I'm like,

"Oh, I'd like to have all of these things.

Maybe we'll get all of it, and we'll share it."

And then sharing it means I eat 80% of it,

-and everybody else behaves. -I hear you...

-I hear you go down with the food. -I do.

You're a foodie on top of foodie.

I hear that you not only eat but you cook.

-I've talked to you about it. -I cook.

Like, you really throw down, though.

-I know. You laugh about it. -It's pretty disgusting.

I've heard... The things that you told me...

I think about what you told me once when we were together.

I think about this a lot, and I, you know,

partly envy it, and it partly makes me feel sorry for you,

and you told me you eat to live.

-That's it. -You don't... you just eat to...

-I eat to make a turd. -Yeah, you...

Yeah, that's what I told you. I eat to make a turd.

I have no... there is no fascination

-Yeah. -that comes from my palate.

I'm not like, "Oh, my God, this blew me away!

I got to get more of this."

-I'm like, "Hmm, that was all right." -In a lot of ways, that's great.

-Yeah. -Because you can... Like, sometimes I think, like,

"You know, uh, I don't want to get COVID,

"but losing my taste buds for a little while

would mean I can eat pretty healthy."

Maybe I'll lose a few pounds, you know?

That would be detrimental to you.

-I know. It's stupid. -If you would've lost your taste buds,

-you would've lost your mind. -Oh, yeah. Long term, for sure.

Are you, are you... is there any want to ever,

like, take on the true... the true world of chef?

-No, that's a lot of work. You know? -Really?

I... Yeah. I mean, when I make dinner for people,

I'll-I'll start... my back starts hurting,

and I go, like, "Oh, what did I do?

-What am I doing?" -Yeah, you told me there's, like, a little feeling,

like, when you have to watch people eat the stuff.

-Yeah, right. -You know, looking... just looking around.

You watch people eat the stuff.

Sometimes they don't say anything, and you're like, "Oh."

Uh, I can't leave without also highlighting,

uh, you know, a gesture that you did

by just sending me a kids' book,

-because you write kids' books, man, and you sent me one, -Oh, yeah.

for me to read to my son.

I-I can't lie to you,

the goose, the book about the goose.

-"The Serious Goose." Yeah. -"The Serious Goose."

My son Kenzo loves the book.

-He does? Oh, great. -Loves, loves the story of the goose.

And, literally, getting it from you,

I was like, "Oh, that's dope."

I said, "Babe, I'm gonna read it to him,

this way, so when I see Jimmy, I can tell Jimmy I actually...

-Right. -put the gift to use."

-My son loved it, man. -Oh, good.

I don't know, I don't know how you stumbled into that world.

I don't know what the reason is...

I did it to raise money for Children's Hospital

-in Los Angeles, and, um, -Wow, okay.

I also wanted to draw... to do all the illustrations.

So I did the illustrations and wrote the book.

-You drew the goose? -Yeah, I drew the goose.

-I had no idea. -I drew all the pictures. I did all the lettering.

-It-it took me forever. -I had no idea.

Yeah, that's what I wanted to do before I got into radio.

-Yeah, see, this is what I'm talking about. -Draw geese.

This is the stuff that people don't know, man.

The stuff that people don't know,

-that they would never know. -Yeah.

-Because all they see is one version of you. -They don't know me.

They don't know you, man. They have no idea who you are.

But I'm glad that I do.

-I'm glad that I not only know you, -Same here.

I'm glad that I can call you a friend.

I wish you liked food. I mean, that would be nice, you know?

I don't want your food, Jimmy.

I don't want your levels of steak and all this stuff.

He's got, like, seven grills.

-I don't know what you have at your house. -I do.

I literally have seven grills.

Yeah, I don't want any parts of this world of-of glutton.

I don't want it. I don't want to go.

If you want to... if you want me to come,

I'll come and hang out, but I'm never gonna eat

-to give you the answer that you want from me when I'm eating. -All right. All right.

-That's me letting you know. -Thank you. I appreciate it.

You're one of the good guys, Jimmy.

-You too, Kevin. I enjoy it. -I mean it, man. I love you, dude.

I've always loved chatting with you and hanging,

-and, uh, it's fun. -I got to reverse it today, though.

-Yeah, you did. -Is this kind of weird, though? Like, you're on, like...

It is a little weird, but I will tell you,

what's weird for me is, I feel guilty

because I'm always conscious in a conversation

about talking too much about myself.

-Mm-hmm. -And I have to constantly remind myself

that you're interviewing me, and I should, uh, allow that.

Ladies and gentlemen, my good friend, Jimmy Kimmel.

-Thank you, man. Cheers, dude. -Thank you.

Cheers. Cheers to you.

See what I'm saying, guys?

Jimmy doesn't know that I'm actually rehearsing

for the day that he walks away, so that way I can have it.

-You can have it now, if you want it. -No. I don't want it.

I got to give you a nugget before we leave.

Life is like a box of chocolates,

unless you don't eat sweets.

Hmm?

Simple, but yet profound.

No? Nobody?

Fuck it, you guys are really pissing me off.

These are nuggets!

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