Original subtitles

[theme music playing]

[Ben] There's no such thing as a small wedding.

And no matter how hard you try to keep it simple--

[Melissa] Mom, I told you I'm not having a hen's party.

[Ben] --there's still the pressure to be perfect.

Because you know why.

[Ben] And that includes writing your vows.

[Melissa] Who cares about tradition.

We know where it got me last time.

[Ben] There's that word "tradition".

[Melissa] Look change of subject.

Have you sorted somewhere to stay?

[no audible audio]

'Cause you know there's no room here, okay?

How are the vows progressing?

So far I've got when asked say I do.

Darling, why don't you ask Mel for some help?

No way. Why do you think I'm over here?

I don't even want her to get a hint

of how tough this is for me.

Okay it was just a suggestion.

No need to bite my head off.

I'm sorry. This is just...

It's a huge deal.

Mega commitment. Forever.

What you're only just figuring that one out?

[Ben] No, of course not.

It's just it all suddenly feels bigger than me

and Mel saying I do. I just want it to be perfect.

Darling, you've still got a week.

I'm sure as soon as you stop staring at that pad,

-inspiration will hit. -[Carbo] Hey, Benno.

-Mrs. Rafter. -Hey.

I've got a question for you.

What comes before part B?

-Huh? -What comes before part B?

Part-ay! Woo!

[singer humming]

[Warney] Girls, girls! Hello, ladies!

-[Dave] Warney, come on mate. -[Warney] Looking good!

Beautiful! Come back later!

[Ben] Mate if you didn't invite Warney, who did?

Well, it must've been your dad, mate.

Are you sure you don't want me getting rid of him?

[Ben] He's already customized his own t-shirt.

[Warney] Put something on will you!

Ah, please tell me we're going to stop

and eat something soon?

Where's your stamina, Mr. Rafter?

[all] Soft! Soft! Soft! Soft! Soft!

Hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey.

Just pacing myself.

My liver's not as young as it used to be.

[makes sound]

Strewth how do you turn him off?

[laughter]

[Carbo] Okay, guys, look we're here.

Who's ready for Ben's big buck party stage two.

-[Warney] Yeah! -[Carbo] Waiting inside

is a Bavarian beer and sausage extravaganza!

-All you can eat. -Whoa, is this one of those

places that you have to wear a plastic bib?

Ah, you been here before, Natho?

Ah, classy, Carbo. This is gonna be awesome.

Mate, if this is awesome, wait till you see

what's coming next!

Ah, I think I've got some sort of idea.

[Dave] Hey, did you invite Warney?

No, I thought you did.

-[Dave] No. -[Warney] Yeah! Woo!

Look at this place! Beautiful!

You better make the most of it, Ben.

In a few days you're gonna be hitched, mate.

-[Nathan] Yeah! -[Jake] Ball and chain, mate.

[Carbo] Let us hang on a tick. I'll go and check

and see if the banquet's ready

and get an extra chair for Warney, yeah?

-[Warney] Yeah, mate. -[Dave] Hey, ah,

how are you going with those vows?

-[Ben] Ah-- -Cool.

you still haven't finished them.

I'm just finessing.

[Ted] What's to finesse? It should be simple.

[Nathan] Yeah, it was easy for me.

Sammy and I just used the traditionals.

You just keep it short and sweet.

-Just like Dave, right? -[Dave] Yeah.

It's not the words that matter,

it's how you feel that counts.

[Carbo] Right, I don't know if you guys are interested.

There's two waitresses out there,

you see the size of their jugs?

-[all] Oh. -Oh, beer!

I meant... Honestly, I meant beer, yeah?

[Ben]Pressure and expectation

take all forms,

like having the best night of your single life.

[Rachel] Melissa!

Surprise!

[Julie] Hello!

[Sammy] Don't worry this is in no way

-official wedding business. -[Rachel] No, no, no

it's not a hen's night at all.

It's just a girl's night in with some champagne.

[Julie] Don't let them rope you in.

If you want a night by yourself,

don't be weak like me.

Well, if it's not official wedding business--

Woo! Go and get your jammies on.

[laughter]

[Julie] I'm an Australian male on TV

-from the '50s to the '90s? -Australian TV, yes.

[Julie] Okay. Um, and I'm an artist?

-And I'm an astronaut? -[Rachel] Yep.

-Clock's ticking. -[Julie] Yeah, all right.

No, no, no, let me think. Um, was I married?

Oh, you've had a few long term platonic

-relationships with women. -Okay.

Ah, I... Can I have a hint?

[Sammy] Mm, um, he's very well endowed.

But not where you might think.

-[Melissa] No. -Too hard. I give up.

You win. Oh, Mr. Squiggle?

That's not... That's not a real person.

[Rachel] Yes, but he is a real celebrity.

[Julie] Oh, you're cheaters, the lot of you.

No, that coming from you?

I've played cards with you thank you very much.

Mel, I'd like you to know that you're marrying

into a family of sneaks and thieves.

-Oi! -Well, I'd take that

over my family any day.

-Oh. -Ah. Woo-hoo!

Hey, thanks for doing this.

[Rachel] It's our pleasure, honey.

[Melissa] Just what I needed?

-What you needed? -Yeah.

To take my mind off things.

-Cheers. -Cheers.

-[Melissa] Cheers. -[man burping]

[Warney] ♪ Plenty more Where that... ♪

[Carbo] We had the meatballs, the bratwurst,

the pork bellies--

[Ben] That was disgustingly amazing.

[Carbo] Okay. It looks like the entertainment's arrived.

I wonder what that could mean?

Oh, not a stripper.

It's tradition, Benno.

[man] Yeah, it is!

Lights! Music! Let's go!

[upbeat music playing]

[man] Female all day.

-[Warney] Yeah! -[man] Whoo!

[Carbo] Nice, very nice. Nice music.

[singer] ♪ I've done something wrong ♪

♪ She won't talk to me ♪

♪ I've done something wrong ♪

♪ And it just won't Set me free ♪

♪ I've done something wrong ♪

♪ Just don't know What I'm gonna do ♪

♪ Set me free ♪

-[Kat] Ben? -[Ben] Kat?

Kat! Hey, Kat!

Where you going?

[Ben] Kat! Kat, stop!

Look, don't make a scene.

[Ben] I can make a scene if I want to. You robbed us.

I don't know what you're talking about.

Do you want to tell that to the cops?

Okay, don't, Ben. You don't understand.

That you're such a gambling junkie,

you're stripping to pay off your debts?

Do you want me to feel sorry for you?

[Kat] Do you honestly think that you have any idea

about how the world works outside your little bubble?

You, you have no perception of how life really is.

-Crap. -Look at you and your friends

getting your pathetic rocks off.

Oh, yeah, and you're not pathetic?

Well, I'm not the one settling

for the whole suburban fantasy.

I don't need to listen to this.

So you moved on pretty fast, Ben.

Who's the lucky girl?

Unless... Oh, my god, it's Melissa isn't it?

Yeah, it is actually.

Are you disappointed you didn't break us up?

[Kat] Wow, you know what? That really is pathetic.

I thought she was smarter than that,

just marrying the glass boy from the Boat Club.

-I'm the manager. -[Kat] Oh, the manager.

Oh, right. Well, that really puts me in my place.

Do you really think that Melissa

is gonna spend her life shacked up

with some nobody that works in a bar?

Is that how the dream goes?

Truth hard to take?

You've got your money. Why don't you piss off?

No, I feel sorry for you, Ben.

You can't even see how tragic it all

is from this side of the white picket fence.

[Jake] So, Ben slept with the stripper

and then she robbed Carbo's place?

[Nathan] It sounds like an episode

of Jerry Springer but yeah.

Yeah, look she wasn't a stripper back then.

Hey, did you find her? What about our stuff?

Yeah, I found her. Can you move

-so I can get my beer? -What did she say?

-Nothing. -What do you mean nothing?

-What about our stuff? -Just leave it, Carbo.

-It's long gone. -You right, Ben?

Yeah.

[Warney] Geez, a bit of a shock, mate.

-[Ben] Yeah. All good. -[Dave] Yeah,

we'll get her details from the agency

-and give them to the cops. -[Carbo] Yeah.

-Have we got the number there? -[Ben] No, no,

-can we please just-- -Crack a few more beers.

We'll jump in the hummer. And hit the pubs.

[Carbo] Yeah! Absolutely! Come on,

let's give this bugger a proper send off. Yeah?

-[all] Yeah. -[Carbo] Come on!

-Come on! -[Carbo] Skull, Benno!

Let's go! Let's do it.

♪ You let me shine ♪

♪ And my love is true ♪

♪ Ah, oh ♪

♪ Because of you ♪

♪ Ooh, ooh ♪

-[Julie] Yay! -[Rachel] Beautiful.

[Julie] Okay. I think it's time for me

and jelly bean to, ah, hit the road.

[Melissa] No, no, no. but there's heaps more songs.

Oh, no, darling that's about as much eighties pop

-as I can handle. -[Melissa] Oh,

but you two can stay, right?

Yep, if there's more champagne I'm here.

-Why not? -Okay, well,

so happy unofficial girly get together.

[Melissa] No, no, no, this was my hen's night.

[Rachel] Mm, I thought you said

you weren't having a hen's night.

No, but this was good. This was good.

Didn't... Not like the last time.

That was the problem.

At my last hen's night, at--

Oh.

Thank you. At my real... No last time,

that was when I realized

I didn't want to marry Shannon.

I sat there and everyone was talking about

how in love we were and how perfect it was.

And anyway, anyway, I didn't want to

associate that with this.

See it's superstitious I know.

[Rachel] Um, you're not having a sudden urge

-to run away now? -[Melissa] No,

I would marry Ben right here, right now.

-[Rachel] Yay! -Seriously, bring him over.

Where is he? Bring him over. Bring him over.

Well, I guess the curse is broken.

I should sit down for a minute.

Oh. Oh, um, Mel, sweetie,

darling, maybe we should get you upstairs?

No, no, I'm good. Comfy couch.

[Julie] I just don't know whether you should--

All right. Here do you want a blanket?

-[Julie] Oh should we-- -[Rachel] Mel?

-[Sammy] Mel? -Mel?

[Sammy] Mel?

Night, night, daughter in law.

[Sammy] Should we draw things on her face?

[laughter]

[humming]

-[Ben] Now, if you wake Mel-- -[Carbo] Shh.

Who's the best man?

-[Ben] You are. -I am.

Who made the best party?

-You did. -I did.

7:00 AM, Benno.

We partied all night.

Best buck's night I've ever had.

-Mm-hm. -Except for Kat.

Except for Kat.

Happy wedding, Benno.

-Oi, Carbo. -Yeah?

Don't tell Mel about Kat.

I want to keep it stoom.

Keeping things stoom about Kat.

-Bad idea. -No, no,

I'm gonna tell her myself.

So no telling Kat about Mel.

Let's be stoom.

-Stoom. -Stoom!

What about Kat?

I didn't tell her, I swear!

Ben?

Goodnight!

What about Kat?

[Ben] She was the entertainment.

What? She was the stripper?

Well, did you talk to her?

Not really. She just...

[makes sound]

What are the chances?

-I know. -[Melissa] All the strippers

and all the buck's nights.

[Ben] I know.

You're not cranky?

About a bizarre coincidence? No.

She's just lucky I wasn't there

to punch her in the face. Stupid...

-I love you. -Whoa!

That is some strong fumes

you've got going there, Rafter.

Ah, you can talk.

Yeah. Sleepy-time.

Come on, Mr. Rafter.

[Ben] Let me carry you to bed, Mrs. Rafter.

No, I'm good. It's Miss Bannon to you.

[Ben] Ah.

No pressure. A whole week to recover.

A week to find the words,

to get it right.

But one week later,

Mel's mega dysfunctional family had other ideas.

Ben!

Ben! Ben!

-[Ben] Mm. -[Melissa] Wake up.

Happy wedding eve, beautiful.

My parents are coming.

I know. Tomorrow.

-No, no, no, no, now. -Now?

Yeah, mom just called.

They caught an earlier flight.

-They're in a taxi. -What?

-Ready to meet the in laws? -Yep.

Linda and Patrick, Linda and Patrick.

The kitchen's okay but I wouldn't let them

go upstairs. Does this look okay?

You didn't have to get dressed up for them.

But yeah, you look great.

Linda and Pat. Big Pat.

Do I need to call them that?

He'll let you know, trust me.

I should get changed, shouldn't I?

-Ben, relax. Just be yourself. -Yeah, okay.

[Melissa] And whatever they say or do,

don't let them get to you, all right?

They won't be here long. They've got a hotel

to check into.

Okay, these should do it. If she doesn't like these,

-she's made out of stone. -Mate, you're a lifesaver.

-Here we go. -[Carbo] I'll leave you to it.

-[Ben] Mate, don't leave me. -They're your in laws.

Yeah, and you're my best man.

-Surprise. -Oh, it really is.

We could've flown in tomorrow

-but really... -No hug.

I guess they're not the hugging type.

[Linda] Imagine meeting at the aisle?

Well, there is no aisle, mom.

We're getting married in a park, remember?

You know what she means, Melissa.

Hi, dad.

[Pat] So, which one of you jokers

-wants to marry my daughter? -[Linda] Oh, Pat.

-Ignore him. -G'day, Ben.

[Melissa] Actually, no, dad, that's, ah...

I'm kidding. Calm down.

I've seen the photos.

Ben, right? Pat Bannon.

It's nice to meet you, Pat.

-Some call me Big Pat. -Big Pat it is.

I reckon we might get to know each other first, huh?

Yeah, sure.

Ah, really nice to meet you, Mr. Pat.

[Linda laughs] I'm Linda.

-What a lovely house. -[Carbo] Yeah, we like it.

You'll get your own place soon?

With these new home buyers grants.

[Pat] Grants.

Call me old-fashioned

but in my day a bloke made sure he was set up

before he proposed.

-[Melissa] A cup of tea? -Yep!

[Melissa] Come on in.

Well, ah, good luck mate. I've got to go to work.

So, you're a bar manager hey Ben?

Yes.

[Pat] How long you been doing that?

I've been working at the Boat Club

since I finished school and I kind of just fell

into managing it a little while ago.

Fell? Right.

But you are studying?

No. No, I'm not.

-Learning a trade? -Uh no.

I mean I figure that I'm still young so--

-How old are you, Ben? -Twenty four, Mr. Pat.

Twenty four.

By the time I was twenty four, mate,

I had a wife, three kids, two mortgages

and I spent ten hours a day down a mine.

Ten?

Sometimes twelve.

Still, can't expect everyone to have the same work ethic,

can I?

Think the ah kettle's boiled. So I--

[Linda] Ah lovely.

[Melissa] Ah no biscuits, sorry.

If we'd known you were flying in early we--

[Linda] Oh we wanted to surprise you.

We're so excited to be here for the wedding,

aren't we Pat?

Still got the suit from the last wedding.

Shame not to get some use out of it, hey poodle?

[Ben] So did you guys have much trouble

changing flights at late notice?

Course you didn't, course you're, you're not,

-you're here. -[car beeping]

Ah that'd be Nathan, my brother.

We're just going to go and pick up some drinks

from the Boat Club.

Really great to meet you both and I guess

I'll see you at the wedding.

I get why there are so many mother in law jokes.

But there should be more father in law jokes.

That bad?

Think car salesman with a grip of death.

[Pat] Oi! Ben!

-Oh god. -Oh, g'day. Pat Bannon.

-G'day. I'm Nathan Rafter... -[bones cracking]

[Pat] Right. Nice wheels. Yours?

Yeah, yeah, I'm still paying it off.

Oh, right you... You're the one in the family business?

Yes, yes I'm, sort of, sort of, the manager.

Stick with it. Family companies

are the best to build up.

A couple of years you'll be laughing.

Oh thank you, Pat.

Call me Big Pat.

[Nathan] Okay.

I left the girls in there gossiping.

Figured I might help you boys get the grog.

Might need the muscle eh, Ben?

[Linda] And this is from Dermott.

Cooking With Crock Pots?

Have you used the crock pot we gave you?

Not yet.

I've brought you something else anyway.

Something very special

that I was going to give you last time.

-Please don't start. -I'm not.

You've made it quite clear that this wedding is nothing

like the last one.

So you and dad are happy for me

to run this wedding my way?

We're here, aren't we?

Yes. You're here and I'm glad.

Mom, it's a lovely thought, thank you,

but I'm not wearing a veil.

Maybe save it for the first granddaughter?

Oh. It doesn't matter.

Just a thought.

No pressure.

Oh Jules, you really outdone yourself.

Oh let's hope it tastes as good.

-[Melissa] Hello? -Oh hello.

Everyone, this is my mother, Linda.

[Julie] Your mother?

Oh hi. I'm Julie hi.

Oh. Um...

Hi and ah Dave. How do you do?

How are you? Sorry.

Ah well, um, so nice to meet you both.

My husband Patrick's just out with your boys

-getting the drinks. -Oh.

[Rachel] Um, hi I'm Rachel.

-I'm Ben's sister. -Hi.

[Sammy] I'm Sammy, Ben's ah sister in law.

-Hi. -[Julie] Sorry for the mess.

We're ah getting the food organized for the wedding.

Is that peanut butter?

Yeah, we're using it for the satay skewers.

I hope no one at the wedding's got a nut allergy.

That'd put a downer on the day.

-You're not allergic, are you? -No, no

I just mean that you can't be too careful.

No, well...

[Linda] So, finger food?

Yeah, it's a small wedding, mom.

-Fifteen people. -Fifteen?

What about all your friends from work?

At the hospital?

And Ben's Boat bar?

No.

Right well fair enough.

-Oh Julie, what a yummy cake. -Oh...

[Rachel] That's for the wedding.

That's the wedding cake.

-Yes. -Oh great.

[Julie] Oh it's a work in progress.

It's... Get another layer and--

Oh, no it, ah, it's a nice touch.

-[Julie] Yeah, there's a-- -Personal, hm.

[Ben] If mom wasn't feeling the pressure before,

she was now.

Hey, you reckon the Boat Club's

-an all right place to work? -What do you mean?

I mean for a guy that's about to get married,

-it's okay isn't it? -Well...

I mean being the manager's pretty good right?

[Nathan] Ben it's a great stop gap

for someone of your age and experience.

-Stop gap? -[Nathan] Yeah, I mean,

you hang in there for a while and then you move on, right?

You're not going to be stuck at that bar forever.

-Yeah. -[Nathan] Yeah.

-[Pat] That lot's sorted. -[Nathan] Listen,

don't worry about him. Just explain

that you've got a plan for the future

and he'll come around.

[Ben]And that was the trouble,

other than marrying Mel,

I didn't have any plans for the future.

Oh not a bad place that Boat Club.

From the way you were talking, Ben,

I expected more.

I can't believe we're getting married tomorrow.

The two of us.

I can't believe we're spending the last night

-of our single lives apart. -Tradition.

Oh I thought there was a boycott on tradition.

It'll make tomorrow more special.

Mm.

I can't wait to hear your vows.

Mm. And ah I can't wait to hear yours.

Do you want to run them by me?

And spoil the surprise?

But I can tell you one thing.

As of tomorrow you have to obey me.

-Oh nice try. -Hey look it up.

I only have to honor you.

Oi, not in front of the parental.

Dad! I thought you'd gone.

Well your mom had her turn.

Came back to spend some quality time

alone with my little girl.

Ran into Carbo first.

Yeah, Big Pat's been giving me advice on the shop.

Well stick with it mate

and when the flower trade picks up

maybe you can find a job for Ben.

[Carbo] Well, all right then.

I'll leave you guys to it. See you.

I better get next door.

See you tomorrow. Eleven a.m. on the dot.

Eleven a.m. I love you.

You don't have to go through with this.

Don't even start.

[Pat] He's got no drive, no plans.

How's he supposed to look after you?

[Melissa] Don't worry. We'll make do.

[Pat] You're a bright girl, Melissa.

Hard working, ambitious.

The proudest day of my life was when you got into nursing.

Why? 'Cause then I could marry a doctor?

You're too bloody smart to waste your time on someone

who's not on your level.

[Melissa] Three years later and you still haven't

forgiven me, have you?

You didn't have to come to the wedding.

You still don't.

But I am marrying Ben tomorrow

however you feel about him because I love him.

Your wedding, your funeral.

[Ben] Like they say, the best test of a guy's character

is how he acts under pressure.

Okay so that's probably about being at war.

Afghanistan or somewhere.

But the idea's the same.

Goodnight Mel.

Mel are you asleep?

I'm not.

I'll take that as a yes.

Ah, Ben?

Darling what are you doing?

I can't sleep.

[Julie] Well it's nearly midnight.

You should be in bed.

[Ben] I should be in bed? What about you?

You're eight months up the duff lady.

Oh I'm just finishing off a few things.

-You're doing too much. -No, not for my son's wedding.

I'll turn in soon. So should you.

Hey, mom... I'm not a loser, am I?

What? Of course you're not a loser.

Why would you even think that?

I just... I want to make sure I'm good enough for Mel.

Oh, darling of course you are.

Any woman would be lucky to have you.

Mel just got in first, that's all.

And she loves you just the way you are, trust me.

Come on, I'll make you a cup of tea

with a bottle of whisky chaser.

Mom, I don't think alcohol's the solution.

Oh I do. You need your beauty sleep

so you can make us all cry tomorrow.

I've got a bet with your dad he'll crack first.

Yeah, my money's on dad winning that one.

Yeah.

I'll be in in a sec.

Okay.

[Ben] Hey, mom?

Thanks.

In less than twelve hours

I was making the biggest commitment of my life

and I still couldn't find the right words.

All right so we've got the hair straightener,

hair dryer curling wands.

-You got the glosses? -Yes.

-Every color? -Yes.

[Carbo] Ah good morning ladies.

It's a nice day for a white wedding.

-[Rachel] Is she up? -The bride is ready

and waiting for her hair and makeup team.

-[Rachel] Good. -How's the groom?

-Ah you haven't seen him? -[Carbo] No.

We haven't seen him since last night.

[Carbo] Well someone must've heard him get up,

-close the door. -Look there's no point

making a big fuss over nothing.

Yeah, he's probably just gone for a walk to clear his head.

Well, if he's gone for a walk

he's been gone for a long time.

Ben, hi, um, just wondering ah, Carbo's here

ah, ready to kick things off, you're not.

Just, um, wondering where you are.

No stress. Just give us a call when you can.

-What's going on? -[Carbo] Uh...

-What's... -What's going on?

-We can't find Ben. -[Carbo] Mm.

-Ah, he's been gone for ages. -[Dave] Yeah, look, the guy

steps out for five minutes to get some air

and suddenly everyone's on high alert.

Yeah, no, no, no,

-we need to find him. -No, no, Mom,

this is mountain molehill territory.

[Julie] No, no, I spoke to him last night.

He... He was in a really weird mood so...

-Well, how weird? -Well, we just need

to find him, okay?

And, um, try not to let Mel know.

Right.

[Sammy] Wow, you are so relaxed.

I was a mess on my wedding day.

Nerves or excitement?

Fear that Mom's hair and makeup team

would make me look like something

out of a little Miss Australia pageant.

[Rachel] Well, there's no danger

of that happening today, Mel.

You're perfectly safe with us.

[Sammy] Yes.

Oi. What are you doing here?

-Hey, I just... -[Rachel] Girls only.

Go back and braid Benny's hair

-or whatever. -Well, no, I just wanted,

you know, check that, you know,

everything's above board here.

-Above board? -Mm.

You know... You know. you guys all good?

You know, you don't need any extra champagne

-or anything? -We're fine.

Good. Hey, um,

Ben didn't swing past here before,

you know, to grab his suit or whatever?

Not that I know of.

Isn't he next door with you?

Yeah, of course he is.

You know, he just said he wanted

a, ah, tie thing.

He must've snuck in and out without you noticing.

Okay, look, I better head back to the boys.

And Ben who is waiting.

You look tops, Mel.

Eye shadow. Mel, close your eyes and...

[Rachel] Carbo, where the hell is Ben?

-We don't know. He's gone. -What?

[Carbo] Well, he's not gone gone.

But he's not answering his phone, gone.

Rachel, you've gotta make sure Mel doesn't find out, okay?

Just until we know what's going on.

Okay, all right, but I want...

I want updates every five minutes, okay?

-[Carbo] Sure. -[Melissa] What's going on?

I'll be on the mobile, If you find him, call me.

Yeah, you too.

Come on, Ben. Where are you?

[phone ringing]

[Ben] Life throws all kinds of pressure at you.

We're expected to know exactly what to say.

So what happens when we don't?

Ben, what the hell are you doing?

Everyone's waiting for you.

-I know. -Come on,

you've gotta get dressed. Let's go.

I can't write my vows.

I haven't even started yet.

If that's not a sign, what is?

That's not a sign that you shouldn't get married.

It's a sign that you wanna do it right.

It's a good sign.

Shouldn't it just come naturally

if I really loved her?

Kat said all this stuff the other night.

What did Kat say?

That Mel deserves better than someone

who manages a bar.

This is Kat the psycho.

The one that tried to split you and Mel up,

then robbed your house and now strips for a living?

Why do you care what she thinks?

She wasn't the only one.

Mel's dad said it too.

Right. So what are you saying?

That you don't wanna marry Mel?

Why are we rushing into this?

You're the one that wanted to rush it, remember?

Getting married as soon as you could.

-Remember, get married... -I know, I just...

Okay, Ben you've gotta...

Far out, you've gotta work with me here.

You've got cold feet, it's normal.

Everyone gets them.

-Did you? -Well, not like this

but I didn't sleep at all the night before.

That's not the same.

Look, if what you're saying here

is that you're having second thoughts,

then I've gotta tell you the consequences

are pretty full on.

I know.

I just want you to think it through.

What do you think I'm doing?

[Julie] And he just went for a walk.

Ah, Nathan's with him and I'm sure

they'll be meeting us at the park soon.

Yeah, and you don't need

to be there for a while anyway.

You know, it's fashionable for a bride

-to be late so... -[Julie] Yeah.

It's okay, Rachel. He'll be there.

[Linda] Mother of the bride. Is it safe to come in?

Julie, hello. How's our groom this morning?

Oh, he's fine.

Doesn't your father look handsome, Melissa?

[Pat] Well, not every day your daughter

gets married, eh, poodle?

Gotta make some effort.

[Sammy] All right, don't stress.

It's all under control but Nathan thinks

we might have to push the ceremony back by a bit.

[Pat] What do you mean push it back?

-Has something happened? -[Rachel] We might just...

We're gonna go and check on the dress.

Ben's just running a bit late.

You've gotta be kidding me.

-[Linda] Oh, well, how late? -I told you, didn't I?

This wedding was never gonna happen!

He's as bloody useless

-as I thought he was! -Stop it, Dad!

-Ben is not gonna let me down. -[Linda] Pat, please.

You go to the park and I will meet you there.

-Now look, Linda-- -Enough!

We haven't come all this way

for you and Melissa to fall out again.

Um, I'll leave you to it, okay?

[Linda] Right.

The wedding starts in an hour

and you need to get dressed.

If you don't mind,

I'd like to help you.

If that's okay?

Should we call the celebrant and let her know

-what's going on? -No, he'll be there.

[Carbo] Isn't it tradition for the best man

to marry the bride if the groom doesn't show up?

It's an urban legend. Don't worry.

Well, not that I wouldn't. It's just that

this was meant to be the best wedding ever.

-Now Ben's not even here. -Look, Nathan will knock

some sense into him. It'll be all right.

-Yeah, I know. -[Dave] Okay, and me and Carbo

-will head down the park. -We can't go without Ben.

[Dave] He'll meet us there. Now have you got the rings?

Yeah, of course.

[Dave] Good.

[Carbo] Um...

Carbo.

Uh, um...

Good to go.

Come on.

[Ted] We'll catch up with you.

Oh, no, you're kidding me.

Oh, no, the cake.

It's sunk.

-Calm down. It's okay. -No. No, Dad, it's not okay.

I, uh...

[Ted] Julie?

-I'm okay. It's, um... -[Ted] No, it's not.

-I'll call the doctor. -[Julie] Dad, don't. I'm fine.

I'm just... I'm just...

I'm just a bit stressed, that's all.

[Ted] Well, all the more reason to call the doctor.

[Julie] I'm not gonna miss the wedding, all right?

[Ted] Look, I'm serious, Julie.

After Nathan's wedding and what happened

-with your mother-- -[Julie] No.

Look, I'm all right.

I just need to have a rest

once this is over, okay?

So let me...

Let's just fix the cake

and we'll get to the park, okay?

Can you do me up?

[Linda] You always have been

your dad's favorite, you know?

Lucky me.

He's a good man.

A good husband.

Maybe not such a good father.

Maybe neither of us were cut out

to be parents.

We do care about you, though.

I know.

[Linda] There.

You look beautiful.

[dramatic music playing]

[Rachel] Hey, Mel, taxi's here.

Oh.

Ooh.

Let's go.

Um, Mel,

ah, we're so sorry.

We should've cancelled it.

I'm gonna tell the driver.

Yeah, so the bride's there before the groom.

I never wanted to go traditional anyway.

-I'll get your bouquet. -Thanks, Mom.

Ah, Carbo left the flowers in the fridge.

[Rachel] Mel, you look... you look so beautiful.

-[Sammy] Yes. -Thank you. Hey, um,

any chance you want to stand next to me

while I wait for Ben?

In the park?

Yeah, I might need moral support

in front of all 15 guests.

Are you asking us to be your unofficial bridesmaids?

Absolutely not.

Just to stand with me, that's all.

Oh, and maybe take my flowers

-at the start of the ceremony? -[Sammy] Sure. Mmm-hmm.

And maybe sign the registry. That's all.

Well, as long as it's not traditional,

-then okay. -No.

Well, then let's get going.

My groom must be on his way by now.

[Ben] Mel had absolute faith in me.

I wish I could've said the same for myself.

If you want me to, I will drive you

to the airport, no questions asked.

And I'll deal with the fallout at home.

Seriously?

Yeah, and if you want me to pass on a message to Mel,

I will.

But it has to be in your words.

I am not making it up.

So, what is it that you wanna say to her?

That's just the problem. I don't know.

Okay, ah, tell me this, Ben. You love her, correct?

-Yes. -She loves you.

Yeah.

[Nathan] And she knows everything about you

and she still wants to marry you.

Hey, don't sound so surprised.

I'm not, idiot. It's my point.

Forget about what everyone said.

I guarantee that when you are asked

to say your vows,

you'll know exactly what to say.

Yeah, but what if I don't?

What if I just screw it all up?

Who cares?

Just say that you love her and that you wanna marry her.

It's simple.

Now, Mel is waiting. So what's it gonna be?

Is it gonna be the airport or the park?

[dramatic music playing]

[singer] ♪ There's a chapel Deep in the valley ♪

♪ For travelling strangers In distress ♪

♪ It's nestled amongst the ghosts... ♪

[Trish] I don't understand.

Why is Melissa here first?

You don't think Ben's done the runner, do you?

If he's not here, he better keep running.

He doesn't want me catching up with him.

Melissa can look after herself.

Look, I don't know what your problem with Ben is,

but take it from me, he's a great bloke.

A great bloke who skips his own wedding.

Look, 11:00 the invite said.

There's still time.

So if you could please move inside,

Big Pat.

[singer] ♪ Take me in, Under your skin ♪

♪ Bury me deep in love ♪

♪ And the little Congregation gathers ♪

♪ Prays for guidance From above ♪

Oh, Dave, this is ridiculous.

Just leave it, Jules. She's here for Ben

-as she should be. -What,

so you're just gonna ignore her

at the reception as well?

We're not that kind of family.

Chel, hey,

-you need to be with us. -No, no, I'm fine here.

No, come on. You missed Dave's wedding.

You can at least share Ben's with him.

It's bad enough that Ben's out there acting like a twit.

I'm not gonna take it from the adults as well,

-so sort it out, you two. -Dave...

[dramatic music playing]

Benno!

[singer] ♪ Bury me Deep in love ♪

♪ Bury me deep In your love, darling ♪

♪ Deeper and deeper ♪

♪ Deeper and deeper ♪

♪ Deeper and deeper in love ♪

You said you wanted non-traditional.

I knew you'd be here.

[singer] ♪ You may lose me All the way ♪

♪ I may be coming over In the night ♪

[Melissa] I love your generosity.

Your kindness.

Even your stupid jokes.

Thank you for giving me your heart,

an amazing home and a loving family.

I can't wait to make a family of our own.

Whatever happens in the future,

I know we'll face it together.

I love you.

[dramatic music playing]

[Ben] This was it. My big moment.

Make or break.

And I still had no clue what I was gonna say.

I, Ben,

take you, Melissa, to be my wife.

To have and to hold

from this day forward,

for better, for worse,

for richer, for poorer,

in sickness and in health

until death do us part.

And as far as I'm concerned, not even then.

The words came.

So much for non-traditional but hey,

if it was good enough for my parents.

[singer] ♪ Bury me Deep in love ♪

[Carbo] Oi, you're not supposed to do that yet.

We're not very traditional.

[singer] ♪ Deeper and deeper ♪

♪ Deeper and deeper ♪

♪ Bury me deep in love ♪

[Carbo] Ah, excuse me. Excuse...

Oi, everybody!

Ladies and gentlemen,

let me present the bride and groom,

my best mate, Ben Rafter,

and his drop dead gorgeous, beautiful wife,

Melissa Bannon! Whoo!

[cheers and applause]

I didn't know she was gonna keep your name.

[Pat] She always did have an independent streak.

[Dave] Ah, everyone, ah, count to three.

I've got something a little bit special

for the couple too.

All right, one, two, three!

[Dave] Yeah! Woo-hoo-hoo!

-Hey... -That's amazing.

Thank you.

[Julie] My little baby, I'm so proud of you.

-[Ben] Don't squash the kid. -[Dave] Congratulations, Ben.

-You made a great choice. -And as for you, who knows

-what you were thinking? -[Melissa] Oh, who knows?

[Julie] Who knows?

[Ben] One last challenge of the day.

Hold on just one second.

Welcome to our little family.

Thank you.

You got cold feet, didn't you?

Yeah, I did, but not about loving Melissa,

or about not being good enough for her.

Can't imagine where I got that idea from.

[Pat] But you turned up anyway.

[Ben] Yeah, 'cause I figured it out.

Whether you like it or not,

I am good enough for Mel

and I do have a plan for the future.

It's all about my wife.

[Pat] Well,

I guess you've got balls after all.

[Ben] Thanks Pat.

[bones cracking]

Call me Big Pat.

[Ben] And just like that, all the pressure

of the past few weeks disappeared.

[upbeat music playing]

Not even death do us part, huh?

-That was really beautiful. -Yeah.

Took me ages to get those words just right.

Hey, have I told you that you're the hottest bride

in history?

Feel free to keep saying it.

Hey, about today, I'm sorry. I just needed time.

It's okay. I know. You don't have to explain.

That's one of the many reasons why I love you.

You're not too bad yourself, in the right light.

I mean, it was... it was beautiful

in a visual sense.

Okay, so I get that.

Two souls coming together

and connecting finally, all that yadda yadda,

but who really believes all the fanfare

about two people wanting to spend

the rest of their lives together?

Well, I do. Are you surprised?

A little bit.

[Jake] And I reckon I'm not the only one

who believes in all the fanfare.

-[Julie] No, darling. -[Dave] Come on.

-Oh, darling, I can't... Oh. -[Dave] Come on,

-I'm not asking you to tango. -Look at the size of me?

-It's all right. -Oh, I'm gonna take up

half the dance floor.

Yeah, you look like a big beautiful egg.

So, two down, one to go, eh?

Well, that's if when Rachel ever does decide

to conform to the masses and it's two down.

-Oh. -[Julie] Two to go.

-Sorry, bubs. -[Julie] Oh.

Do you mind if I dance with my son?

Oh Chel, you're a lifesaver.

I'll sit back down.

-May I? -Yeah, sure,

if you can keep up.

Is Sammy's Mom hitting on my dad?

-Ooh, where? -Wait, don't look. Wait.

[Ted] Come on. Speech, speech.

All right, all right, all right, all right.

Um, thank you everyone for sharing today

with me and the missus.

Ah, there's just a few special mentions.

Melissa's parents flew all the way from Perth

to make sure I was good enough

for their daughter.

It was a big deal, so that's a big thanks

to Big Pat and Linda.

Thank you.

Carbo, my best mate

and my best man, thank you.

-I love you, mate. -I know.

-[laughter] -[Ben] Um,

to the most amazing, supportive family

anyone could ever wish for.

To my new grandmother, Chel,

and to my nan, Louise,

I know you're up there looking down on us.

Well said, mate.

A toast to Ben and Melissa!

[all] Ben and Melissa!

Woo! Woo-hoo!

Ooh, oh, one more thing.

Nathan and Sammy never got to have

-their wedding reception. -[Julie] Aww.

So I figure better late than never,

come on guys, this is your cake too.

Okay, no one move. We've got five seconds.

Ready? Smile.

[Carbo] End of an era, Benno.

No more swinging singles.

It'll be different, mate, but just as good.

Thanks.

Not just for the flowers

but, you know, for everything.

Ah, anything for a mate.

Well, not just any mate.

The best mate anyone could have.

Are you crying?

No.

[Ben] You are! You're crying.

I can see it. Come here.

Mate, it's just raining on my face.

Oh, yeah, inside?

-You all right? -Yeah.

[Nathan] Time for you to leave.

You've got a long drive.

-Thanks for the car. -No worries.

-[Julie] Ah. -See you.

[Julie] Bye darling. Bye! Bye!

[Dave] Drive safely.

[Julie] Have a great time! Bye!

Welcome to your new life, Mrs. Rafter.

I mean, Ms. Bannon.

You can call me Mrs. Rafter in private.

Good.

[Jake] Oh Carbo, you forgot to tie the cans on!

[Carbo] Oh! I was emotional, all right?

[Ben] When the pressure's finally off,

everyone can relax.

Usually, that's a good thing.

But when it's been the only thing

keeping you upright.

-[Dave] Jules? -Dave, I think you need

to call an...

-[Sammy] Julie? -[Rachel] Mom?

[Dave] Someone... Someone call an ambulance.

Call an ambulance.

[mellow music playing]

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