Original subtitles

[Ted] Some moments in life are life-changing.

That moment I first set eyes on Louise,

Christmas 1960.

I knew we'd be together forever.

When she died it was, like, the whole world had stopped,

only I was still here.

Louise always said life was for living

and she was right.

At some point you've got to get back on the horse,

take back the reins.

But no one said it was easy.

[theme music playing]

[Julie] A roster?

Yeah, just see it as an early Christmas present.

No, you know, what this family's like,

"too busy", "too tired".

Well, after everything you've done for them lately,

this family owes you.

It's not like that.

[Dave] Well, from now on, it's going to be.

You know how little me time you have.

Just making sure you get a whole lot more.

Good day, you two.

Didn't expect you to be at home.

Ted, just in time.

Um, now that you're living back here...

-[Ted] Yeah. -Ah, new house rules.

Everyone's got to pull their weight.

No more defaulting to me and Jules.

Oh, I do my bit.

Yeah, I know but, ah, you know,

two dish washer loads a week

and, uh, your famous stir fry.

I need a bigger commitment.

This shopping's thirsty work, mate.

I'm serious. Come on, let me take you

-through the roster. -Sure.

Okay, now you're here in red--

[Sammy] Someone's been shopping, hmm?

Are these yours, Julie?

[Julie] Ah, no. So, what have you been buying, Dad?

Ah, just a few things.

[Julie] Ah, what things?

Ah, none of anyone's business.

Hey, Ted, what about the roster?

Oh, wow, shopping for clothes.

That's got to be a good sign.

[Ted] The last time I bought clothes

without Louise was decades ago.

Like, with so many things, I was way out of practice.

[dramatic music playing]

I'll be off then.

Hang on. Ah, you're on dinner duty.

-I'm sorry? -On the fridge.

The new roster.

No one told me about a roster.

Yeah, I did. You obviously weren't listening.

-[Rachel] Dad... -Look, I don't want

to get heavy on day one but the minute--

But you will anyway.

We start swapping and changing,

the whole thing falls apart.

Granddad's going out.

I don't have to go.

Yes, you do. When do you ever go out?

Exactly. Look, I am happy to cook.

I've got this new macrobiotic thing

-I want to try anyway. -Macrobiotic?

Mmm-hmm. Why not?

It worked for Gwyneth Paltrow.

Scored her Chris Martin.

Look, I'm not sure about the macrobiotic thing.

I'm also not sure that we should start--

Dad, Granddad didn't know.

Okay? He has got plans.

I've got plans.

Which is how I ended up here.

Taking back the reins...

though it felt more like winding back the clock

to when I was 15.

If you're looking for the Christmas beer and wine,

-this is the place. -Ah, well...

We're all shrinking violets at first.

Don't worry.

Fresh flesh.

I think you'll find you'll be very popular.

Come on.

[Ted] Was it just me

or did the whole room go silent?

So, the beer and wine is over there

and mince pies if you're feeling festive.

What's your poison?

I'll have a beer, thanks.

Coming right up.

No, I can get it.

Majorie Stevens.

Welcome to Friend Finders.

Thank you. Ted Taylor.

I've never done this before.

I've never heard that before.

Don't mind, Marj.

And yes, she is always like that.

-Shirley Summers. -Ted Taylor.

So, what brings you here, Ted?

Well, now that I'm here, I'm not quite sure.

First timer, eh?

-Widower? -Eight months.

I'm divorced.

Twice.

There's a big difference between you and me, Ted.

Mmm-hmm.

Okay, hobbies. Golf? Bridge?

Sky diving?

Bridge, no.

Um, 500 was more our style.

Golf, sometimes.

Ah, we'd like bushwalking, travel.

What about you?

I need a top up.

If you ever do take up golf, or skydiving for that matter,

give me a call.

[Helen] Here, have a security blanket.

My experience alcohol helps.

Not too much but just enough

to take off the edge of the paranoia.

-[Ted] Well, actually... -Ah, there you are.

Sorry about the delay.

Apparently the venue for the boot scoot

on Boxing Day has fallen through.

You wouldn't know anyone, would you?

Someone with a spare barn and some hay bales

or failing that, a scout hall?

So, Ted.

Tell us about yourself.

Ah, well, um...

I mean, why haven't we seen you here before?

Oh. What's Finnish for overkill?

-Finnish? -Yeah, or Swedish,

or whatever it is they speak at the North Pole.

What's this thing here? I can't see the TV.

Oh, do you think anyone's going to want to watch it?

It's Christmas.

Oh, and the Boxing Day Test count for nothing?

No, it's, ah, you know, exuberant, very creative.

Thank you.

Told you, I'd organize you some more me time.

Who knows, you might even discover some hidden talent.

-Wow! -Oh, you like it?

-[Sammy] Yeah, it's amazing. -Thanks.

Mom, when nut-job Christmas freaks deck out their houses,

don't they normally do it on the outside?

Yes, well, normally, maybe they do

but this is for us.

In honor of the fact that the first time

in a long time we're all living under the one roof.

[Dave] Yeah, apart from Ben over in the annex.

What is it with moms and Christmas?

Oh, you know, your mom.

She's a real sucker for that good will

-towards men rubbish. -Mmm-hmm. No.

God knows what Rachel's cooking out there.

It looks like glue.

-Are you all right? -Yeah, yeah, yeah.

I just, um, thinking about how much effort

your mom's going to. All those decorations.

She's always been like that. She loves it.

Yeah, I know. It's great.

We always had a tree but...

it was like dad'd throw money at some decorator.

Mom'd be bombed on eggnog by midday

and there were more presents than DJs

but nothing ever meant anything.

You'll have fun this year.

I know.

-I'm looking forward to it. -Good.

I'm really looking forward to it.

Good.

[Julie] Dinner's ready.

This is, um...

what's it called again?

Yeah, yeah, tell me again how you made this.

Seitan. Wheat meat.

So it's gluten flour, kneaded into a dough,

rinsed underwater to get rid of the starch

and then sauteed in a wok.

It's kind of, like, stir-fried bread.

Mmm-hmm. Only much better for you.

This roster of dad's, ah, Rach.

You're not down for the Christmas lunch, are you?

[Rachel] Yep.

-I am cooking nut loaf. -Very traditional.

-[Nathan] Rachel, it's gray. -You don't have to eat it.

[Sammy] So this is like some kind of, um, meat substitute?

Yeah. It's cool, huh?

And the texture is so much like real meat

that even some hardcore vegos won't touch it.

If even vegos won't eat this,

I don't see why I should have to.

That's mental.

Zero fat, more protein, less cruelty to animals...

What about this animal? Hmm?

You said it.

I'm going for a walk.

Oh, to the Thai place by the station?

Don't think this gets you out of your turn on rosters.

That is not just cardboard and texts up there.

That is stone. Yeah, Dad, we have read

the ten commandments. We know the deal. Come on.

Oh, well, their loss. More for us.

No way have I got time for a roster.

It's their house, their rules.

Sam, it's killing me just doing my job at the moment.

Where's my keys?

In there. We have been a bit slack.

Yeah, but with good reason.

We're out of here at 7:00,

not back till 8:00, some days 9:00.

I can't cook and clean on top.

[Sammy] Your mom manages.

Yeah, well, we commute.

That's two hours she gets that we don't.

Come on. Let's go and get some real food.

Something with a color that's actually a color.

Oh, thanks, Janelle.

[Frank] Newbie I take it.

Don't stand on ceremony, it's only me.

Frank Reynolds.

-Ted Taylor. -Oh, you're a lucky man, Ted.

Never as popular as your first outing.

Well, you're not the first person to say that.

Oh, it's true.

How many phone numbers so far?

Oh.

Exactly.

You make hay while the sun shines.

It's all downhill from here.

There's only one thing most of these women

are here for.

A wedding ring.

So if you don't strike while the iron's hot,

that's it. Trapped.

Piano concerts, card nights, art galleries,

oh, activities galore

except maybe the one you're here for.

So why do you come?

Well, beats staring into a computer screen all night,

typing to some girl in Finland

who might have a beard for all you know.

Yeah. Another drink?

Oh, go on. Go on. You paid your entrance.

Might as well make a night of it.

Can be a lonely time, Christmas.

I'll be right, thanks.

All right.

Well, I haven't said this in a long time

but I am officially knackered.

-Shh. -Sorry.

-Good book? -Mmm-hmm.

-Virginia Woolf. -She's...

Heard of her.

Since when did you start reading Virginia Woolf?

Since Nicole Kidman won the Oscar.

But you're only on page six.

Well, it's not an easy read.

And I keep getting interrupted.

Oh, sorry.

Next thing you'll be joining a book club.

Yeah, well, that or...

-belly dancing or something. -Good.

That's exactly why I've become

-the roster Nazi from hell. -Yeah.

Don't you think you're going a little bit overboard

-with all of that? -No, I'm just supporting you

if you hadn't noticed.

You're not copping it anymore,

everyone leaning on you to pick up after them.

You know, there should be a lot more give,

and a lot less take around this joint.

Hmm.

Oh, so I can join a book club?

-Yep. -Thanks.

-Have you found a book club? -No. No, not yet.

-When? -Oh, when I can find one.

Don't turn into the book club Nazi as well.

I'm getting out there, thank you.

[door closes]

Looks like your father seems to be.

-Precisely. -Where are you going?

Ah, toilet.

Just leave the poor guy alone.

-It's none of our business. -No, I, ah, told you,

need the loo.

Oh, hello there. Didn't hear you come in.

Evening, love.

-So, how was your night? -All right.

So nothing earth shattering then?

What, just a movie?

Catching up with friends?

Ten-dollar steak at the pub?

-Yeah, the pub. -Which pub was that?

-Night, Jules. -Night, Dad.

[door opens and closes]

[Ted] I don't normally hide things from my daughter.

Louise had given me a blessing

in her letter to the future.

But it was Christmas again.

And Christmas when we met.

So the truth was the big question...

was I ready myself for this dating caper?

[Rachel] Oh, hang on a minute, what's that?

-Washing up. -Oh, no, you don't.

Just because it's not your turn,

it doesn't mean you abnegate all responsibility.

[Nathan] Sorry, abne-what?

If you're simply going to dump your bowl

in the sink, Nathan, it is just as easy,

watch me, very carefully, to dump it in the dishwasher.

Mmm-hmm. So how easy is it to unload last night's dishes?

-That is not my job. -Well, it's not mine.

Right, well, it is...

-Sammy's job. Where's Sammy? -Not here. She's at work.

How come she didn't unload the dishwasher?

Why do you think? Unlike you,

some of us have to work on Saturdays.

Would you two keep it down a bit.

Weekend magazines, please.

Mom, I don't want to start. I really don't but...

Well, then don't.

This roster thing is never going to work.

Well, it will, if people take responsibility,

-manage their schedule. -Oh, and if people don't?

No need to answer that.

Just go and enjoy your bath, all right?

Thanks, darling.

I may be gone sometime.

Dad I've got to get ready for work.

No, I have to get to yoga.

-No, no, Dad, Dad... -Dad I've...

"Dad" what?

Do you know what you both sound like?

For once in your life

Try and sort things out for yourselves.

Did something die around this place?

Don't look at me. I'm not on fridge duty.

How long's Julie going to be in the bathroom for?

Small hint, Granddad. From now on check the roster.

I'm not covering a second time.

Has something died around here?

[Rachel] I don't believe it.

We are out of dishwashing liquid.

Well, who's rostered on for the supermarket run. Hmm?

[Chrissy] Good morning.

[Rachel] Oh, don't know about the good part.

Haven't seen you around for a while.

No, is your mom in?

[Rachel] Jury's out on that one too.

What do you mean? She's all right, isn't she?

No, if you call hogging the bathroom

half the morning all right, she's just peachy.

Thought she might want to come

Christmas shopping with me.

[Rachel] Oh, well, if you head past a supermarket,

we're out of dishwashing liquid.

Benno, just the man. Payback time.

[Carbo] Okay, guys, breakfast is on the table.

Thanks. Did you have any whites for the wash?

I'm doing whites first.

Oh, whatever stuff was in the laundry basket.

[Ben] Right, recycling's done.

Weekend papers and fresh milk, and...

[Carbo] And did you get any, ah...

Orange juice?

Who wants a coffee and who wants tea?

Unbelievable.

-Good morning, Rachel. -Hi.

When did you guys get so organized?

It's called house sharing. You should try it sometime.

But this isn't sharing.

This is The Sound Of Music

after Maria made clothes from the curtains.

Are those what I think they are?

-What? -Are you washing their undies?

Sure. They wash mine.

It's what housemates do.

Since when? The last time you washed

a pair of boxer shorts was never.

You have never washed a pair of underwear in your life.

Yeah, well, if everyone does their bit,

-pulls their weight... -Okay, okay.

I had Dad doing his brain about rosters all night,

I think I'm starting to get the message.

Ah, can I please borrow some detergent?

Sure. I'll take that.

Hey, Carbo, I just saw Chrissy.

How are things going in love land?

Ah, you know what? The water's boiled.

You can make your own tea.

Did something happen?

You could say that.

[Chrissy] Oh, I've got to hand it to Dave.

He's thorough.

I think he's forgotten to put down,

"clean floors with toothbrush

and cut grass with nail scissors."

Don't tempt him.

And fumigate the fridge.

What is that smell?

Yeah, it's getting worse, isn't it?

Oh. Hey, ah, listen, do you reckon

it'd be all right if I went and said hello?

Well, if you don't mind talking through doors.

Please, I was married to a workaholic.

Oh, by the way, first rule of laundry,

don't mix whites with colors.

Second rule is don't teach grandma how to suck eggs.

Touche.

Jules, it's me.

Ah, I've just come to say hi.

Come in, if your name's not Rafter.

-Hi. -[Julie] Hey.

[Chrissy] Haven't seen that much of you lately.

Well, I've been a bit busy.

Are you sure you're not avoiding me?

No. No, of course not.

Well, you can't stay in there all day, you'll liquefy.

Mmm-hmm.

Having some me time. Dave insisted.

Oh, me time.

Well, why don't you go and do something?

I'm reading the papers.

No, something proactive.

You know, something spontaneous.

-Come shopping. Spend. -Spend what?

Cards are maxed as it is.

Okay. Here's what we'll do.

Come out tonight with me and Angela.

-Who's Angela? -[Chrissy] Friend of mine.

Just got divorced. You'll love her.

Come and have some cocktails, have a boogie.

-Dancing? -Yeah, why not?

Because I haven't been dancing in years.

Then it's about time you did.

Because I'm married.

Married women can go dancing.

What without their husbands?

Julie, I'm not asking you to come to a swingers' club.

Just come and have a pre-Christmas drink

with the girls.

Yeah, well, what will Dave do?

-Whatever Dave wants. -And Carbo?

Yeah, I'm not sure about Carbo.

He's not talking to me.

It might be over.

Should I be sorry?

No, it's...

you know, we're friends, we have the same interests,

we weren't joined at the hip.

So, a girls night out, hey?

Look what else I got down at the shop.

Mom always reckoned she was the whizz

-at Chrissy decs but-- -Sorry, the what?

Get with it. Christmas.

Eating too much, drinking too much,

giving Chrissy presents...

Very spiritual.

Okay, it's also about the birth of Jesus.

I don't do Christmas.

Whoa, back up. What?

[Melissa] I didn't last year. I worked. It was great.

You're not working this year.

You're coming to Chrissy lunch with me.

[Melissa] Ben, stop saying Chrissy.

Why?

Because it shows how trivial you think

this whole thing is.

No way, you've got to be kidding.

I love Christmas. I do.

It's all about getting together

and being kind to your fellow man and family.

I'm sorry. Is this about your family?

Let's not go there, okay?

It is, isn't it?

I don't do family, remember?

I don't do Christmas and I don't do family.

You can do mine.

Please don't work at Christmas.

It'll be special, I promise.

Something's definitely not right.

It's either the drains

or someone's not keeping up with their roster duty.

Ah, Dad, you haven't seen my black singlet, have you?

You haven't worn that in ages.

No. Haven't done a lot of things in ages.

I remember you in that. Very nice.

Thanks. Whether it still fits or not is another matter.

Ah, Dad, my black singlet.

I'm sorry, love.

I had some cards in my pocket and...

-Oh. -I've tried washing it out

five times but it's stuck like glue.

Cards? Bummer.

I was going to wear this tonight.

To help me get my disco groove back.

Disco? Who's going to a disco?

Me. Well, nightclub.

Ah, it's a girls night out with Chrissy and Angela.

-It's okay, isn't it? -Yeah, yeah, no worries.

Yeah, good.

Ah, Dad, what cards?

Just some cards.

Oh, well, don't worry, I'll take care of it.

[Ted] Can I've a word?

[Julie] Yeah, course.

You look terrific, love.

Oh, thanks.

It's just breathing that's the problem.

Yeah, I was thinking about losing those cards

in the wash was the world's way

of telling me something,

or me telling myself something.

[Julie] Sorry, what? What do you mean?

Well, I read about this social group,

Friend Finders for the over 50s.

-Oh. -And last night

I went along for Christmas drinks.

But Dad that's fantastic.

And those cards I collected,

phone numbers, email addresses...

And you lost them in the wash?

[Ted] Yeah.

But Dad that doesn't mean anything.

So you left them in your pocket, so what?

It wasn't Freudian.

What's great is that you're, you know,

you're looking to the future.

Well, there was this one lady,

-Helen something. -Ah.

And I was thinking that she might

want to come along to the scrabble night tonight.

Oh.

Well isn't there an office you can ring

to find out her number that way?

Well, Dad, you know, at least you've taken the first step.

But this is what she would've wanted.

She told me as much.

Really?

In a letter.

The one in the time capsule.

"If anything should happen...

live your life", she said.

That's what we all have to do.

[doorbell rings]

I'll get it.

You're a hard man to track down, Ted Taylor.

But needs must where the devil drives.

I brought you some rum balls.

So, may I come in?

[Dave] You're a bit of a dark horse, aren't you mate?

Never told me there was anyone in your stables

-called Majorie. -Out. Now.

-What about the drains? -[Ted] Forget the drains.

-Two kids back at home? -Yep.

Well, that's the trend these days, isn't it?

Oh, I don't know about a trend.

It's just the way things worked out.

And Ted too?

Um, you've really got your work cut out for you.

Oh, no, not anymore. They're all house trained.

Ah, anyway, I'll, um, I'll leave you both to it.

-Nice to have met you. -Nice to meet you too.

-Where'd she spring from? -Shh.

-Ah, milk? -No, thank you.

So, how did you find me?

Being membership secretary has its perks.

What I didn't expect

was that it'd be your daughter's house.

Yeah, well, after Louise...

At our age you're just not prepared.

All those years together and then suddenly alone.

Mmm-hmm.

I had rather hoped that you'd contact me.

I mean, I don't give my card to just anybody.

Well, we only met last night.

That's true but, you know what they say,

timing is everything.

-Rum ball? -No, thanks.

Oh, hello.

The smell's in here now.

I reckon the whole system's blocked.

This toilet's not flushing properly.

-Whoa. You look great. -Oh, thanks.

Where did you say you were going again?

[Julie] Um, I don't know.

Some nightclub that Chrissy goes to.

Don't worry, I'll be home before I turn into a pumpkin.

-Ah, what's it called? -Ah, Tracks? Sax?

Tracks? Isn't that where all the local,

ah, groovers go?

Yeah, what, don't you think I'll fit in?

No, no, that's the problem.

I think you'll fit in just perfectly.

Oh.

-Thank you. -What was that for?

The vote of confidence.

[Marjorie] Okay, you ready?

This is how it is.

Look, at my age there is no time

to beat around the bush.

I'm a retried chemist, the shop variety,

and I've been a widow for three years

and spent pretty much all of that time by myself.

I own my own house and I've got a few shares,

nothing too lavish.

I've got a daughter on the Gold coast,

a son in Perth, and I like dancing,

occasional game of tennis, crosswords and travel.

The question is, do you think there's any chance

that you and I might be compatible

because if there isn't, I don't want to waste

anymore of your time, or mine.

I mean, and neither of us is getting any younger

and I'm sure that neither of us

wants to be alone any longer than we have to.

-Majorie, I um... -No?

Of course. I mean, that's fine.

A bit disappointing but absolutely fine.

I mean, nothing ventured, nothing gained, I always say.

No time wasted and no hard feelings.

It's not what I meant.

What did you mean?

This is all so new to me.

I feel terrible.

Oh, don't feel terrible, this is just my way

of circumventing all the usual rubbish

that comes with getting to meet someone.

Listen, you'll see.

It's a lot less painful this way.

I mean, now we can be just friends.

None of those complicated half-baked definitions.

[sighs]

Now if I could just use your bathroom, I'll be off.

Yes.

Of course.

Everything all right?

Oh, I don't know.

This whole meeting people business,

it's not how I remember it.

-Oh, times change. -Oh, do they?

And whatever happened to meeting someone you like,

getting up the courage to ask them out

and then floating home on a cloud

when they said yes...

Oh, well.

Maybe you haven't met the right girl yet.

[Majorie] Oh, my sweet stars. Oh dear! Oh!

-Majorie? -[Majorie] Stop! Stop!

-Majorie? -[Majorie] It won't stop!

-What's happening? -The toilet's blocked.

There's water everywhere and that's not all.

I'll turn off the water.

[Julie] So sorry.

[Majorie] I knew you wanted me out of here.

You didn't have to booby-trap the facilities.

[laughs]

All right, it's official. The bathroom is now closed.

What? Dad, we're three days out from Christmas.

No way.

Oh, I'm telling you, it's your vego meat.

That gelatinous muck you washed down the sink.

Right. And the fact that there are five

adult carnivores sharing one toilet,

nothing to do with it.

We didn't start eating meat yesterday,

-you stopped. -[Julie] All right.

Well, I think I've masked the Eau de Toilet

with some Eau de Toilette, so I'm off.

[Rachel] Have a nice night, Mom.

Yeah. Don't do anything we wouldn't do.

Well, there's a license to play up

-if ever I heard one. -Hey. Hey.

-Oh. -Yeah, have a good night.

-Yeah, you too. -Oh, yeah.

Me and the sewerage. Looking forward to it.

Oh, I love you.

-Love you too. -[Julie] Bye.

-We're out for dinner. -Bye.

[Rachel] Yeah me too.

Hey, Dad, you really should get a hobby.

You know, even mom's getting out.

Hello.

Not much more I can do tonight.

If you need to strain the potatoes, try the yard,

the grass likes the phosphates.

Look, I'm going to head next door

for a beer if you fancy it.

At least their bathroom's not, uh...

-blocked. -No, thanks, mate.

-Happy here. -Okay then.

[dramatic music playing]

Helen?

Maybe the universe was trying

to tell me something after all.

Bugger it.

[cheerful music playing]

[indistinct chatter]

-Good evening all. -Hello again.

You short of a fourth?

Um, no. Actually that's Merv's seat.

He's just gone to the loo.

Ah, no worries.

I might just help myself to a juice.

You need to keep a clear head with this scrabble.

Excuse me.

It was lovely to meet you last night.

You too.

Merv's been chasing me for ages.

Last night he, uh, walked me to the car.

Lucky Merv.

It's not often you meet someone

you really connect with at these things.

Merv's the man, eh?

[Helen] Well he's, um,

well he's kind and thoughtful.

Counts for a lot.

Well I, uh, I should be getting back.

Let's hope I get something more interesting

than "T's" and vowels this time.

Good luck.

Now who was it who said

Christmas can be a lonely time?

Well, without that someone special to share it with,

they knew what they were talking about.

I still can't believe the price of lipstick.

That'll teach me to hibernate twelve years

with the wrong fellow.

[Julie] Oh no, look at the queue.

[Chrissy] Follow me, girls.

[Stace] Are you on the guest list?

Good. Hold on one moment please.

If my name's not on that guest list,

there'll be trouble.

[Stace] If your name's not on the list,

you're not coming in.

Chrissy Merchant. Plus two.

Hm.

Welcome to Tracks.

Come on.

Thanks Stace. It's always nice to impress.

No worries. I'll see you at the hairdresser.

[Julie] Oh.

I think I know how my dad felt last night

at Friend Finders.

-[Chrissy] How's that? -[Julie] Old.

-[Angela] Don't be silly. -[Julie] And out of practice.

[Chrissy] Oh, rubbish. It's like riding a bike.

Besides, you're only as young as the man you feel.

[Julie] Oh.

[laughter]

I think I'm having age inappropriate thoughts.

There you go. Just get back on that bike.

[Angela] Yeah. Enjoying the view.

Oh. No, sorry. Wrong table.

Yeah. No. I'm too tipsy after one.

Sorry.

Oh, no. Oh, no. Sorry, we can't accept the drinks.

Why not?

Because what are we agreeing to?

Nothing.

No one buys you a drink for nothing.

There are expectations.

Yeah, that you enjoy the drink.

-Oh... -[Chrissy] Jules,

are you here to enjoy yourself or not?

-Okay, okay! -[Angela] Woo hoo!

[Chrissy] There you go. That wasn't so hard, was it?

Why do I feel like I've just been unfaithful?

This is a bit of harmless fun.

[Angela] Cheers ladies, merry Christmas.

Ah, merry Christmas. Thanks for this.

[Angela] Yes, thank you so much.

Oh, oh, oh. Oh, my God.

They're coming over.

-How do I look? -Sensational.

[Angela] On the issue of global warming,

are you pro-Gore or do you think

that it's all just cyclical and...

-Oh, hello. -[Ric] G'day.

Mind if we join you?

Actually, we're just in the middle

of a conversation.

[Angela] Oh, it can keep, you know.

Ice cap's not melting that fast.

[laughter]

Actually, I was just wondering if you'd like to dance.

-I love dancing. -Um, no.

I don't think so. I haven't finished my drink.

-Oh. -[Julie] For which thank you.

[Paul] Come on, it's a good song.

-Is it? -Of course it is.

Dance with the man. It's Christmas.

-Her name's Julie. -Julie.

-All right. Hi, Julie. -Hi.

I'm Paul, Julie. Lovely to meet you.

Hi, Paul. Hi.

[Paul] So are you going to come and dance?

-Well okay. -[Angela] Yay! You go girl!

[Julie] I should let you know I am married.

Oh, yeah. I'd like to be one day.

Oh, you just haven't found the right girl yet?

-Ah, not really, no. -[Julie] Oh.

[Paul] So, um, where's the hubby?

Um, he's at home unblocking the drains.

-He's a handyman, is he? -Yeah.

Oh, yes, he is.

[singer] ♪ I see you Walking in the club ♪

♪ Making moves, gettin' love ♪

♪ You know you're sexy ♪

♪ Yeah, you flaunt it ♪

♪ Walkin' through The disco noise ♪

♪ Kissing girls, Kissing boys ♪

♪ It's all the same ♪

♪ But I don't care ♪

♪ You're making love To the music ♪

♪ I'm your DJ, Make you lose it ♪

♪ Coz you love me ♪

♪ Yeah, you love me ♪

♪ I'll make the bass line Nice and deep ♪

♪ For all you freaks On disco treats ♪

♪ Just shake that ass ♪

♪ Just shake that ass ♪

♪ Get on it ♪

♪ Percussion hits your ears ♪

♪ Smell the sex in the air ♪

♪ This shit is crazy ♪

♪ Yeah, it's crazy ♪

♪ You know the morning's Coming soon ♪

♪ I feel the heat In the moon ♪

♪ Let's all get liftin' ♪

♪ Get liftin' ♪

♪ You're making love To the music ♪

♪ I'm your DJ, Make you lose it ♪

♪ 'Cause you love me ♪

[Julie] Chrissy, that was fantastic.

But I've got to go. I'm exhausted.

[Chrissy] No, we're going to Jo-Jo's.

[Julie] No, I can't. Really.

I've had such a great time but...

-[Chrissy] What? -Ah.

I've got someone keeping a bed warm for me.

I should get home.

Night.

Um, say goodbye to Angela for me.

-[Ted] Good night? -Ooh.

Hey.

Um, yeah it was fun.

But?

But, uh, a lesson on how lucky I am.

How about you? Did you go out?

A lesson on how tough it is out there.

What? Even in your snazzy new shirt?

[Ted] Oh, it takes more than a new shirt to impress.

It takes kindness, thoughtfulness

-and triple word scores. -Sorry?

Don't worry about it.

Oh, there's that smell again.

Oh... time for bed.

Even a happily married woman needs her beauty sleep.

You, uh, are you staying up?

For a little while.

Okay. Well, goodnight.

[Ted] Goodnight.

Well, that's the trouble with reaching out.

Sometimes someone gets hurt.

[birds chirping]

Dad, what are you doing?

What does it look like?

Are you crazy? Call a plumber.

[Dave] Yeah, on a Sunday? You've got to be kidding.

-Where are you off to? -Well, like, I have a job.

Property inspections on a Sunday?

That's a bit rough too, isn't it?

Yeah, exactly. Which is why you don't...

you don't think mom's going to make me

stick to the roster, do you?

-No, I'm going to. -Dad, that's not fair.

You've got me down for dinner tonight.

Well, pick something up on the way home.

I've got back to back meetings.

[Dave] Time management.

That's what it's all about, mate.

Dad, that's really... that's really not fair.

Well your mother's been doing it all this time.

Yeah. Well, she's had years of practice.

[Dave] Exactly. So maybe it's time to share the load,

pick up the slack.

And just in case that's what you were thinking

about doing, maybe you could help me with the...

Maybe you could help me with these drains!

-There you go. -[Chrissy] Thanks.

So, what time did you hang up your dancing shoes last night?

Not long after you left.

Oh, I didn't mean to spoil the party.

No, you didn't. I just...

I'd started seeing the place through different eyes.

I just started thinking,

please, don't judge me on this.

Never.

I just started wondering what's Carbo doing.

You know. Is he playing a computer game

or eating pizza,

or is he crashed out in front of the telly?

He really likes me, Jules, and I hate to admit it

and I know that you think it's weird, but I just...

I feel comfortable with him, you know.

It's easy.

[Dave] Jules?

Jules, you seen the drain plan?

-What? What drain plan? -[Dave] For the yard.

The, uh, the drains don't seem to be where you...

-where you'd think they be. -[Julie] Um,

well it's probably with the passports

-and birth certificates. -Where's that?

With all the other important documents.

-Where's that? -[Julie] Oh.

I think we might've lost the passports

and birth certificates.

Sorry. You were saying?

Just that, you know, it's hard enough

to find love in this world,

you should probably grab it when you can.

Don't you think?

Yeah, I do think.

[doorbell dings]

[Melissa] I'll get it.

Not sure about the nature doco, mate.

Who wants to watch insects doing the bizz

while we're eating our dinner?

You choose then.

[Carbo] Okay, what else is on?

Same old Christmassy?

Scrooged is on.

I love Scrooged.

[Melissa] Carbo.

-Hello. -Hi.

[Carbo] What are you doing here?

We're just about to have dinner

in front of the telly.

Scrooged is on.

Right.

I thought you weren't comfortable

with the guys here.

That's what you said.

[Melissa] Um, Ben, there's carols on.

Oh, yeah.

See, getting in the Christmassy mood already.

-Help yourself to pasta. -Thanks guys.

So what are we?

Friends?

What does that mean?

Means I'm not embarrassed to be with you

and I'm not going to stress about the age thing.

So, more than friends?

Well who needs labels?

I do.

-What's this? -Open it and find out.

No way. It's beautiful. You shouldn't have.

There's your label.

Nick.

Happy Christmas.

-Merry Christmas. -[laughs]

[Julie] Dave, you could've excavated

through to London by now.

Yeah, good thing I found the passports.

Ah, this is useless, Jules.

I'm going to have to call the plumber.

He's going to come in here, dig up the entire backyard,

maybe even relay the entire drainage system.

You know how much it's going to cost us?

-No. -More than we have,

I can tell you that much.

Living life's on hold, Jules.

The roster-nazi has spoken.

[indistinct chatter]

Okay, yes. I stuffed up, all right?

-I'm a loser. -Nathan, what's...

[Nathan] I can't do my job

and plan a menu at the same time.

That is why we are having...

yummy diet meals, okay? That's all they had.

If you wanted something different, fine, I don't.

I don't have it.

If you'd had the sort of rubbish day that I've had,

I've had Karl all over me, I got stuck in traffic,

I've lost my bloody phone charger,

no one would return my call...

Well don't look at me like...

-Nathan... -Not now, Sam, okay?

Whoa. Meltdown.

Mate, you got the dinner. It's no big deal.

-I lost a sale. -[Dave] So what?

Well, I thought it was in the bag.

The bloody vendor went with someone else.

Boss isn't happy.

Well, it's just one sale, Nathan.

I've never made a sale, Dad, do you realize that?

They pay for my phone, they pay for my car,

I'm in debt up to here and I'm going backyards.

Well, I'm sorry mate. I didn't know that.

You want me to be perfect? I'm not.

[Dave] No, we never said that.

[Nathan] You did! This morning,

you said work, cook, dig drains.

And I don't appreciate the mom act, you know.

Nath, I'm your dad.

I care about you too, you know.

I'm sorry. I didn't mean that.

I'm trying but it's just not happening.

Life's not that easy. You can't just take it

and mold it in what you want.

-Come here. -No.

Come here. It's all right.

[Ted] Giving Julie more time for herself

had brought Dave some unexpected rewards.

[phone ringing]

[Ted] But Nathan was right.

It takes a lot of courage to engage with life...

even when opportunities present themselves.

Ted Taylor.

Hello. It's, uh, Helen.

Look, I know this is a bit out of the blue

but I wondered if you'd be able

to have dinner with me sometime?

Merv and I, it didn't work out.

I'm free tomorrow.

Christmas Eve?

Oh, Helen, I'd love to,

but I can't, I'm sorry.

Not tomorrow.

Family commitments.

[singer] ♪ Have yourself A merry little Christmas ♪

♪ Let your heart be light ♪

[Ted] One step at a time.

I'd found Friend Finders.

I'd maybe even found some friends.

[Dave] That's for me. It's my lego.

No, not that, not that that would've mattered.

[Ted] But on this night of all nights,

there was nowhere else I'd rather be,

than at home, with family.

[singer] ♪ From now on ♪

♪ Your troubles Will be miles away ♪

♪ Here we are As in olden days ♪

Oh, yay.

[singer] ♪ Faithful friends That are dear to us ♪

♪ Gather near to us Once more ♪

[Ted] Now, that's a tofu turkey.

[all] Oh.

[singer] ♪ Through the years ♪

♪ We'll always be together ♪

♪ If the fates allow ♪

♪ Hang a shining star ♪

♪ Upon the highest bough ♪

♪ And have yourself ♪

♪ A merry Little Christmas now ♪

Everyone, Merry Christmas.

[all] Merry Christmas.

[Ted] All of us ready to face the future.

Next year.

[country music playing]

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