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1
00:00:11,212 --> 00:00:13,214
[ Bell Dings ]
2
00:00:51,252 --> 00:00:53,687
[ Typing ]
3
00:01:11,705 --> 00:01:13,374
[ Slurps ]
4
00:01:53,314 --> 00:01:55,283
[ Watch Alarm Beeping ]
5
00:02:03,491 --> 00:02:05,526
[ Birds Chirping ]
6
00:02:05,593 --> 00:02:07,595
[ Thunder Rumbles ]
7
00:02:23,311 --> 00:02:25,346
Roddy!
8
00:02:25,413 --> 00:02:27,381
School.
9
00:02:28,349 --> 00:02:30,851
[ Chuckling ]
10
00:02:30,918 --> 00:02:32,486
Morning.
11
00:02:33,854 --> 00:02:36,123
[ Plates Clattering ]
12
00:03:15,195 --> 00:03:17,130
[ Phone Rings ]
[ Doorbell Buzzes ]
13
00:03:17,197 --> 00:03:19,267
Get that, would you?
14
00:03:19,333 --> 00:03:23,170
If you're not giving me a lift,
I'll have to get
another minicab.
15
00:03:23,237 --> 00:03:25,406
[ Ringing Continues ]
16
00:03:25,473 --> 00:03:27,007
Tristesse Books.
17
00:03:28,976 --> 00:03:32,246
I've got Wuthering Heights
with my year tens.
18
00:03:32,313 --> 00:03:34,782
Hello. Yes?
19
00:03:34,848 --> 00:03:36,784
Tristesse Books?
20
00:03:36,850 --> 00:03:38,151
Tom Duval?
21
00:03:38,218 --> 00:03:40,020
Oh, yeah, come in.
22
00:03:40,087 --> 00:03:42,189
Just down the hall.
23
00:03:44,358 --> 00:03:46,727
No--
[ Speaking French ]
24
00:03:46,794 --> 00:03:48,962
No.
[ French ]
25
00:03:49,029 --> 00:03:51,031
[ French ]
26
00:04:00,341 --> 00:04:02,343
[ French Continues ]
27
00:04:11,619 --> 00:04:14,722
Mm-hmm. Mm-hmm.
28
00:04:14,788 --> 00:04:16,924
Mm-hmm. Yeah.
29
00:04:16,990 --> 00:04:20,528
Yeah. Oh, yeah.
No, he's a wonderful writer.
30
00:04:20,594 --> 00:04:23,063
[ Loud Clattering ]
Very unremittingly bleak.
31
00:04:23,130 --> 00:04:26,967
[ Screaming In French ]
No, Tristesse doesn't
publish him anymore.
32
00:04:27,034 --> 00:04:30,304
Do you know what?
He had a little
disagreement with Tom.
33
00:04:30,371 --> 00:04:34,207
[ Shouting In French Continues ]
34
00:04:35,776 --> 00:04:38,479
Oh, yeah.
She's one of
my favorites. Yeah.
35
00:04:38,546 --> 00:04:41,181
Yeah. She was long-listed
for the Booker, you know.
36
00:04:42,049 --> 00:04:43,751
Right after she was sectioned.
37
00:04:43,817 --> 00:04:45,619
[ Loud Bang ]
[ Shouting In French Continues ]
38
00:04:45,686 --> 00:04:48,689
Au revoir!
Au revoir, Monsieur Richard!
Au revoir!
39
00:04:50,724 --> 00:04:53,026
No. She-She-- She left--
She left too.
40
00:04:53,093 --> 00:04:54,662
- [ Whispers ]
Jane Lockhart.
- Oh--
41
00:04:54,728 --> 00:04:56,063
[ Clanging ]
42
00:04:57,631 --> 00:04:59,633
What are you doing?
43
00:05:02,703 --> 00:05:04,372
I'm so sorry.
44
00:05:04,438 --> 00:05:07,941
I didn't mean to--
I was just touching it.
45
00:05:08,008 --> 00:05:11,111
Not, like, touching it.
That sounds like molesting.
46
00:05:11,178 --> 00:05:13,013
Like I'm some
kind of pervert.
47
00:05:15,649 --> 00:05:18,085
Which I'm not.
48
00:05:18,151 --> 00:05:22,255
So, Young European Publisher
of the Year, Runner-Up.
49
00:05:22,322 --> 00:05:24,425
That's really impressive.
50
00:05:24,492 --> 00:05:28,061
I have a swimming certificate.
[ Chuckles ]
51
00:05:29,997 --> 00:05:31,765
Who the hell are you?
52
00:05:31,832 --> 00:05:33,467
Jane Lockhart.
53
00:05:34,968 --> 00:05:37,405
I wrote
The Endless Anguish
of My Father.
54
00:05:38,472 --> 00:05:39,940
Oh.
55
00:05:41,409 --> 00:05:42,610
Yeah.
56
00:05:42,676 --> 00:05:44,912
Follow me.
57
00:05:47,214 --> 00:05:49,049
[ Mutters ]
Hello.
58
00:05:50,651 --> 00:05:52,753
I'm busy,
so I'll keep this brief.
59
00:05:52,820 --> 00:05:54,922
I read your novel.
I'm afraid it needs work.
60
00:05:54,988 --> 00:05:56,256
A lot of work.
61
00:05:56,323 --> 00:05:58,125
Please, sit down.
62
00:05:58,191 --> 00:06:01,962
But it has potential,
so I'm going to publish it.
63
00:06:03,564 --> 00:06:05,298
I'm offering you
a two-book deal.
64
00:06:05,365 --> 00:06:08,235
It's going to mean
a lot of rewriting,
definitely a new title,
65
00:06:08,301 --> 00:06:10,871
and neither of us
will get rich, but...
66
00:06:10,938 --> 00:06:14,608
I think you have it in you
to be a writer, and,
unfashionable as it may seem,
67
00:06:14,675 --> 00:06:16,243
that's what I came here
to find.
68
00:06:16,309 --> 00:06:18,045
I believe you are--
69
00:06:20,514 --> 00:06:22,115
[ Sobbing ]
70
00:06:23,150 --> 00:06:25,118
crying.
Sorry.
71
00:06:26,319 --> 00:06:28,889
I didn't mean to start.
72
00:06:28,956 --> 00:06:33,661
It's just--
It's been so long,
you know.
73
00:06:33,727 --> 00:06:36,029
So many rejections,
and I have a board.
74
00:06:36,096 --> 00:06:38,265
You have a board?
Of rejection letters.
75
00:06:38,331 --> 00:06:40,333
I call it my Board of Pain.
76
00:06:41,201 --> 00:06:42,970
Well, that's completely normal.
77
00:06:43,036 --> 00:06:44,638
It is?
78
00:06:44,705 --> 00:06:46,840
I'm sorry.
He was like this
at university.
79
00:06:46,907 --> 00:06:48,542
Everywhere he went,
crying women.
80
00:06:48,609 --> 00:06:51,011
You lot are supposed
to be charming.
Well, charmant, n'est-ce pas?
81
00:06:51,078 --> 00:06:53,180
I told you,
never speak in French to me.
No, no, no.
82
00:06:53,246 --> 00:06:54,782
Don't you dare!
No, really!
83
00:06:56,517 --> 00:06:59,720
I've never been
so happy...
84
00:06:59,787 --> 00:07:02,823
in all my life.
85
00:07:03,491 --> 00:07:05,493
[ Sobbing ]
86
00:07:08,996 --> 00:07:11,131
[ Groaning ]
87
00:07:12,700 --> 00:07:15,335
[ Sobbing Continues ]
88
00:07:37,891 --> 00:07:39,693
Jane.
89
00:07:39,760 --> 00:07:41,762
There is no need to be nervous.
90
00:07:41,829 --> 00:07:43,731
Nervous? Me? No.
91
00:07:43,797 --> 00:07:47,067
No, no, no.
I'm not nervous.
Not me. Yeah.
92
00:07:47,134 --> 00:07:49,036
Okay, a little bit nervous.
93
00:07:49,102 --> 00:07:51,705
[ Chuckles ]
You'll be fine.
94
00:07:51,772 --> 00:07:54,775
Sorry, it's just
usually I need a run-up
before I start editing.
95
00:07:54,842 --> 00:07:57,878
Like, uh, tea, a walk.
Regret in the shower.
96
00:07:57,945 --> 00:08:00,013
Or we could just begin.
97
00:08:01,348 --> 00:08:04,752
Okay. Okay. Yeah.
So, uh, where do you
want to begin?
98
00:08:04,818 --> 00:08:07,788
Well, call me crazy,
but we could start
at the beginning.
99
00:08:07,855 --> 00:08:11,191
[ Chuckles ]
Yeah. Okay. Yeah.
100
00:08:12,025 --> 00:08:14,728
You crazy Frenchman.
What?
101
00:08:14,795 --> 00:08:16,797
I don't know. Right.
Fine.
102
00:08:18,198 --> 00:08:20,601
- So you're in a good mood.
- I'm always in a good mood.
103
00:08:20,668 --> 00:08:22,035
No, you're not.
Yes, I am.
104
00:08:22,102 --> 00:08:23,537
Are you?
Yes.
105
00:08:23,604 --> 00:08:25,906
Oh.
[ Giggles ]
106
00:08:25,973 --> 00:08:29,276
So, first sentence--
I think it's so good.
107
00:08:29,342 --> 00:08:31,311
It's beautiful.
108
00:08:32,345 --> 00:08:34,347
** [ Pop-Rock ]
109
00:08:47,628 --> 00:08:49,897
[ Chattering ]
110
00:08:55,869 --> 00:09:00,073
[ Woman ]
* I fell into your eyes
with an inky-black splash *
111
00:09:00,140 --> 00:09:02,175
[ Chuckling ]
112
00:09:02,242 --> 00:09:06,614
* I fell into your eyes
with a shiny black splash *
113
00:09:08,315 --> 00:09:11,251
* My, oh, my, cherry pie
what a big, big splash *
114
00:09:11,318 --> 00:09:12,820
Don't do that!
Come on.
115
00:09:14,922 --> 00:09:19,426
* I ran into your heart
with a brutal crash *
116
00:09:21,729 --> 00:09:25,733
* I ran into your heart
with a full-on smash *
117
00:09:28,268 --> 00:09:32,505
* My, oh, my, cherry pie
It all happened so fast *
118
00:09:34,541 --> 00:09:38,812
* My, oh, my, cherry pie
It was so, so fast *
119
00:09:40,547 --> 00:09:45,318
* Like rain that falls
without a warning *
120
00:09:45,385 --> 00:09:48,856
* On a sunny morning *
121
00:09:48,922 --> 00:09:51,625
* This is how we met *
122
00:09:53,560 --> 00:09:58,331
* Like sugar
in my cup of coffee *
123
00:09:58,398 --> 00:10:01,468
* Apples dipped in toffee *
124
00:10:01,534 --> 00:10:04,805
* This is how we met *
125
00:10:06,707 --> 00:10:08,709
Well, actually,
I'm reading it right now.
126
00:10:10,610 --> 00:10:13,781
"I shut my eyes and sank into
the water, letting it caress
over my face and hair"--
127
00:10:13,847 --> 00:10:15,182
Hello?
128
00:10:16,283 --> 00:10:18,952
Oh! I was just,
you know, passing,
129
00:10:19,019 --> 00:10:22,489
and thought it might have
come back from the printer's,
and it actually has.
130
00:10:22,555 --> 00:10:24,858
[ Tom ]
Yeah. I don't know.
131
00:10:24,925 --> 00:10:29,196
* With joys
of season's greetings
This is how we met **
132
00:10:29,262 --> 00:10:31,398
"Beneath my feet,
I felt crumbled pages."
133
00:10:31,464 --> 00:10:33,400
[ Shouts ]
134
00:10:34,735 --> 00:10:37,104
[ Breathing Heavily ]
I don't believe this.
135
00:10:37,170 --> 00:10:38,839
I'll call you back.
136
00:10:38,906 --> 00:10:40,908
Happy Ending?
Happy Ending?
137
00:10:40,974 --> 00:10:43,877
What happened to
The Endless
Anguish of My Father?
138
00:10:43,944 --> 00:10:46,379
What happened?
You know how important
this stuff is.
139
00:10:46,446 --> 00:10:49,049
You changed my title--
to that!
140
00:10:49,116 --> 00:10:52,619
I told you,
the very first time we met,
I said it must go.
141
00:10:52,686 --> 00:10:54,454
Yeah,
but we never discussed it.
142
00:10:54,521 --> 00:10:57,257
I knew how you'd react,
darling.
143
00:10:58,025 --> 00:10:59,359
0i! Careful.
144
00:10:59,426 --> 00:11:01,594
That's my Young Publisher
of the Year award.
145
00:11:01,661 --> 00:11:04,197
Runner-up!
[ Grunts ]
146
00:11:04,264 --> 00:11:05,766
Oh!
147
00:11:06,499 --> 00:11:08,235
What's wrong with you?
148
00:11:08,301 --> 00:11:10,637
- Who are you?
- What?
149
00:11:10,704 --> 00:11:14,107
All that time
we spent together
working on the manuscript.
150
00:11:16,009 --> 00:11:19,880
No one's ever
got me the way you--
151
00:11:24,151 --> 00:11:26,453
[ Chuckles ]
152
00:11:27,888 --> 00:11:29,957
I don't know you.
153
00:11:30,023 --> 00:11:31,524
[ Sighs ]
154
00:11:33,961 --> 00:11:37,164
Look.
It was a terrible title,
and I changed it.
155
00:11:37,230 --> 00:11:39,232
What's done is done.
156
00:11:40,433 --> 00:11:43,670
Let's move on.
How can it be
so easy for you?
157
00:11:43,737 --> 00:11:47,707
Perhaps because I am not
a moderately talented writer...
158
00:11:47,775 --> 00:11:51,779
whose loser dad left her
with an inability to stop
worshipping her own pain.
159
00:11:51,845 --> 00:11:53,413
Worshipping my own pain?
160
00:11:53,480 --> 00:11:55,816
Come. Sit down.
Let's talk about the launch.
161
00:11:56,950 --> 00:11:59,519
You know what?
162
00:11:59,586 --> 00:12:02,155
Our deal is one more book,
and then what's done is done.
163
00:12:03,757 --> 00:12:06,026
Let's move on.
164
00:12:15,335 --> 00:12:17,370
[ Door Opens ]
165
00:12:17,437 --> 00:12:18,438
[ Door Closes ]
166
00:12:22,442 --> 00:12:25,378
[ Jane ]
"Most childhood summers
are long and blue.
167
00:12:26,413 --> 00:12:28,081
Mine wasn't like that.
168
00:12:28,148 --> 00:12:30,450
And certainly not the summer
when Mum got sick.
169
00:12:30,517 --> 00:12:34,287
I knew if I just went out
and saw her in the sun
she'd be all right again."
170
00:12:34,354 --> 00:12:38,892
[ Continues Reading,
Indistinct ]
171
00:12:45,532 --> 00:12:48,468
"She'd taken me
to Woolworths to choose
my birthday present,
172
00:12:48,535 --> 00:12:52,005
and it wouldn't be like
last year when Dad just slipped
a Barbie under his coat...
173
00:12:52,072 --> 00:12:54,007
and walked right out
the door with it."
174
00:12:54,074 --> 00:12:56,076
[ Chattering ]
175
00:12:57,610 --> 00:12:59,579
[ Jane ]
Well, it was lovely
to meet you both.
176
00:12:59,646 --> 00:13:01,982
[ Chattering ]
177
00:13:02,049 --> 00:13:03,250
Hi!
178
00:13:03,316 --> 00:13:05,652
[ Chattering Continues ]
179
00:13:05,718 --> 00:13:07,687
Susan. Thank you
for coming down.
180
00:13:07,754 --> 00:13:10,657
[ Man ] One more.
One more.
There you are.
181
00:13:13,961 --> 00:13:16,529
And this is to--
182
00:13:24,037 --> 00:13:26,206
Dad.
183
00:13:46,994 --> 00:13:48,795
[ Applause ]
184
00:13:48,862 --> 00:13:50,630
[ Whistling ]
185
00:13:50,697 --> 00:13:52,532
[ Chattering ]
186
00:13:58,939 --> 00:14:01,108
[ Man ]
It's great to be here
to present this award...
187
00:14:01,174 --> 00:14:03,944
for Best New Writer...
188
00:14:04,011 --> 00:14:07,747
to an outstanding debut.
189
00:14:08,481 --> 00:14:10,117
Happy Ending.
190
00:14:10,183 --> 00:14:11,885
Jane Lockhart.
191
00:14:17,690 --> 00:14:19,192
[ Chuckles ]
192
00:14:19,259 --> 00:14:21,294
Oh, oh!
193
00:14:21,361 --> 00:14:23,730
[ Cheering ]
[ Woman ]
Whoo-hoo!
194
00:14:23,796 --> 00:14:27,334
Congratulations.
Thank you.
195
00:14:29,336 --> 00:14:33,706
I'm so--
What we have here
is a real writer.
196
00:14:33,773 --> 00:14:36,776
Someone who can go to
some pretty dark places.
197
00:14:36,843 --> 00:14:39,846
But I get it, Jane.
Writers--
198
00:14:39,913 --> 00:14:43,450
We both understand what it is
to face el Toro Blanco--
199
00:14:43,516 --> 00:14:45,752
the terror
of the white bull,
the blank page--
200
00:14:45,818 --> 00:14:49,122
[ Chuckles ]
and every day we face it,
201
00:14:49,189 --> 00:14:50,890
together.
202
00:14:51,959 --> 00:14:54,361
Right, Jane?
Mm-hmm.
203
00:14:54,427 --> 00:14:57,630
Ladies and gentlemen,
Jane Lockhart.
204
00:14:57,697 --> 00:15:00,968
[ Applause, Cheering ]
205
00:15:05,505 --> 00:15:07,274
[ Giggling ]
206
00:15:08,108 --> 00:15:09,676
Thank you.
207
00:15:12,545 --> 00:15:14,547
Ooh!
[ Giggles ]
208
00:15:21,054 --> 00:15:22,555
Oh!
209
00:15:34,834 --> 00:15:37,104
[ Typing ]
210
00:15:40,807 --> 00:15:44,344
[ Man Huffing ]
211
00:15:49,482 --> 00:15:51,484
[ Huffing Continues ]
212
00:15:58,058 --> 00:16:00,593
[ Huffing Continues ]
213
00:16:17,144 --> 00:16:19,446
[ Phone Rings ]
214
00:16:24,517 --> 00:16:27,287
Yeah?
[ Jane ]
I'm starting the final chapter.
215
00:16:27,354 --> 00:16:30,323
- You'll have the manuscript
by the end of the week.
- About bloody time.
216
00:16:30,390 --> 00:16:32,692
Ah, Tom, as ever
my little ray of sunshine.
217
00:16:32,759 --> 00:16:36,863
- Well, moan all you like.
I've never been this--
- Annoying?
218
00:16:36,929 --> 00:16:38,631
Happy.
219
00:16:38,698 --> 00:16:40,700
You bastard.
Happy.
220
00:16:40,767 --> 00:16:43,836
So, one more chapter.
221
00:16:43,903 --> 00:16:46,706
Yes.
And we never have to
see each other again.
222
00:16:46,773 --> 00:16:48,775
Mmm. Yes.
223
00:16:48,841 --> 00:16:51,778
Better get writing then.
224
00:16:51,844 --> 00:16:54,647
- À bientôt, Jane.
- Au revoir, Tom.
225
00:16:54,714 --> 00:16:56,216
[ Beeps ]
226
00:17:51,771 --> 00:17:54,040
[ Huffing ]
227
00:17:57,144 --> 00:17:59,779
** [ Humming ]
228
00:17:59,846 --> 00:18:02,615
Willie.
I'm off out for a bit.
229
00:18:02,682 --> 00:18:03,850
Sure.
230
00:18:03,916 --> 00:18:06,386
** [ Humming ]
231
00:18:06,453 --> 00:18:08,488
[ Huffing ]
232
00:18:09,522 --> 00:18:11,191
[ Woman ]
Just looked at the chapter.
233
00:18:11,258 --> 00:18:13,393
[ Objects Banging ]
234
00:18:13,460 --> 00:18:16,696
[ Tom ]
Listen. I don't care
what you think.
235
00:18:16,763 --> 00:18:19,132
I'm telling you,
this is not
an opening chapter.
236
00:18:19,199 --> 00:18:21,234
It's an ice age.
237
00:18:22,669 --> 00:18:24,704
You can't talk to me like that.
238
00:18:24,771 --> 00:18:29,342
Okay? I was voted one of
Scotland's foremost novelists
under the age of 30.
239
00:18:29,409 --> 00:18:33,079
[ Tom Fake Sobbing ]
240
00:18:35,148 --> 00:18:38,851
And that's why
I won't allow
this piece of crap...
241
00:18:38,918 --> 00:18:41,554
to be published
with your name on it.
242
00:18:43,323 --> 00:18:45,658
You have my notes.
Fix it.
243
00:18:51,464 --> 00:18:54,033
Bye then, Nicola.
See you at the launch.
244
00:18:55,835 --> 00:19:00,573
If you try to make me cry,
I'll inform Inland Revenue
about your yacht.
245
00:19:13,019 --> 00:19:15,021
** [ Humming ]
246
00:19:16,923 --> 00:19:18,391
Hi.
247
00:19:18,458 --> 00:19:20,126
Hi.
248
00:19:29,135 --> 00:19:33,373
[ Tom ] If we have to talk
figures, can you do that thing
where you use vegetables?
249
00:19:33,440 --> 00:19:35,542
Imagine this tomato
is my cash flow.
250
00:19:35,608 --> 00:19:37,877
How many new writers have you
thrown money at this year?
251
00:19:37,944 --> 00:19:39,979
I only throw money
at good writers.
252
00:19:40,046 --> 00:19:42,415
Good Scottish writers.
I'm very patriotic.
253
00:19:42,482 --> 00:19:45,952
And what does it matter?
One hit pays for
all the rest.
254
00:19:46,018 --> 00:19:49,689
- And I have a best seller
in the wings.
- Mmm. Jane Lockhart. Yeah.
255
00:19:49,756 --> 00:19:52,459
So how's the new book
shaping up?
I have no idea.
256
00:19:52,525 --> 00:19:55,495
She won't let me read
a word until it's finished.
257
00:19:56,729 --> 00:19:58,265
Relax.
258
00:19:58,331 --> 00:20:00,300
It'll be just like
the first one.
259
00:20:00,367 --> 00:20:02,302
I read that she was
moving publisher.
260
00:20:02,369 --> 00:20:04,404
Klinsch & McLeish,
with the red and white covers.
261
00:20:04,471 --> 00:20:06,973
That's big-time.
Klinsch & McLeish.
[ Scoffs ]
262
00:20:07,039 --> 00:20:10,076
You know what they're
called in the trade?
Clench and Release.
263
00:20:10,142 --> 00:20:11,811
They're not right
for my Jane.
264
00:20:13,480 --> 00:20:15,181
For Jane.
So talk to her.
265
00:20:15,248 --> 00:20:19,051
- Persuade her to stay.
- But I don't want her to stay.
266
00:20:19,118 --> 00:20:22,355
After she delivers
her new novel,
I want her to go-- far away.
267
00:20:22,422 --> 00:20:24,090
Oh, for God's sake, Tom.
268
00:20:24,156 --> 00:20:26,859
Tristesse Books
is on the verge of
compulsory liquidation.
269
00:20:28,328 --> 00:20:30,563
And... I've had an offer.
270
00:20:30,630 --> 00:20:33,165
Well, you're
a very attractive--
Shut up.
271
00:20:35,167 --> 00:20:37,103
They want to invest in you.
272
00:20:40,907 --> 00:20:43,175
I don't need
Pandemic Media.
273
00:20:43,242 --> 00:20:46,413
I have Jane Lockhart,
and this time
she's going all the way.
274
00:20:46,479 --> 00:20:51,651
Are you sure?
Because if she doesn't deliver,
your tomatoes look like ketchup.
275
00:20:51,718 --> 00:20:54,020
[ Chuckles ]
She'll deliver.
276
00:20:54,086 --> 00:20:56,356
She might be a miserable
pain in the arse,
277
00:20:56,423 --> 00:20:59,292
but when she's writing,
she's like a guided missile.
278
00:20:59,359 --> 00:21:01,093
** [ Humming ]
279
00:21:02,429 --> 00:21:03,996
[ Typing ]
280
00:21:08,435 --> 00:21:10,703
Teaspoon.
281
00:21:10,770 --> 00:21:13,039
[ Phone Rings ]
282
00:21:13,105 --> 00:21:15,675
** [ Humming Continues ]
283
00:21:17,410 --> 00:21:18,878
Willie.
284
00:21:18,945 --> 00:21:21,213
Willie, will you get that?
285
00:21:21,280 --> 00:21:23,650
[ Typing ]
Willie.
286
00:21:23,716 --> 00:21:25,718
[ Ringing Continues ]
287
00:21:35,395 --> 00:21:38,264
- Hello?
- Thursday or Friday
for the manuscript?
288
00:21:38,331 --> 00:21:40,333
Greaseproof paper.
289
00:21:41,734 --> 00:21:43,102
Oh.
290
00:21:45,104 --> 00:21:48,274
Just want to check.
You're certain it will be
finished next week?
291
00:21:48,341 --> 00:21:51,043
I told you,
one more chapter.
292
00:21:51,110 --> 00:21:52,579
What are you doing?
293
00:21:54,447 --> 00:21:56,248
- Nothing.
- Are you baking?
294
00:21:56,315 --> 00:21:57,584
[ Beeps ]
295
00:21:58,818 --> 00:22:01,821
[ Phone Rings ]
296
00:22:05,124 --> 00:22:07,460
[ Ringing Continues, Muffled ]
297
00:22:10,162 --> 00:22:12,331
[ Ringing Continues ]
298
00:22:13,400 --> 00:22:15,535
Oh, my God.
299
00:22:16,235 --> 00:22:18,037
She's baking.
300
00:22:18,104 --> 00:22:19,972
She only bakes
when she's blocked.
301
00:22:25,077 --> 00:22:28,715
- [ Man ] Largest planet
in the solar system?
- Jupiter.
302
00:22:28,781 --> 00:22:33,052
Who did Ali beat to become
world heavyweight champion--
for the first time?
303
00:22:33,119 --> 00:22:37,156
Sonny Liston. Come on.
The quiz is gonna be harder
than this. Get serious.
304
00:22:37,223 --> 00:22:40,727
Aye. Who was
Shakespeare's wife?
305
00:22:42,495 --> 00:22:44,263
Hi, Dad.
306
00:22:44,330 --> 00:22:46,899
- Hi, darling!
- Oh!
307
00:22:48,801 --> 00:22:50,737
[ Whispers ]
Who was Shakespeare's wife?
308
00:22:50,803 --> 00:22:52,004
[ Whispers ]
Anne Hathaway.
309
00:22:52,071 --> 00:22:53,873
[ Man ]
And at the end
of the third round,
310
00:22:53,940 --> 00:22:57,510
the leaders are
Benny Lockhart and his Jets
with 22 points.
311
00:22:57,577 --> 00:22:59,979
Join us for
the second half in 10 minutes.
312
00:23:03,583 --> 00:23:05,518
All right.
I will take something.
313
00:23:05,585 --> 00:23:08,320
Mr. L.
Ah, Tom!
314
00:23:09,556 --> 00:23:11,390
Good to see you again.
Good to see you.
315
00:23:11,458 --> 00:23:13,460
- How are you?
- Aye, good.
Where have you been hiding?
316
00:23:13,526 --> 00:23:16,328
- From your daughter mostly.
- Oh, I understand that. Aye.
317
00:23:16,395 --> 00:23:18,765
Never talked to me for years,
but with good reason.
318
00:23:18,831 --> 00:23:21,300
- Hey. What are you having?
- [ Jane ]
Nothing.
319
00:23:21,367 --> 00:23:23,002
He's not staying.
320
00:23:23,069 --> 00:23:26,205
Come on, Jane.
What are you doing here?
321
00:23:26,272 --> 00:23:30,610
My favorite author is being
adapted by Scotland's most
talented screenwriter,
322
00:23:30,677 --> 00:23:32,178
Will Scott.
323
00:23:32,244 --> 00:23:33,580
Huge fan.
324
00:23:33,646 --> 00:23:36,983
Naturally, I want to know
how he's getting on.
325
00:23:37,049 --> 00:23:40,720
Well, I may not be
the most talented, but...
326
00:23:40,787 --> 00:23:42,522
who else you gonna pick, huh?
327
00:23:42,589 --> 00:23:45,892
[ All Laughing ]
328
00:23:48,327 --> 00:23:50,362
Where is my novel?
I'm working on it.
329
00:23:50,429 --> 00:23:52,699
So you're not suffering
from el Toro Blanco?
330
00:23:52,765 --> 00:23:54,967
The what?
So you're not B-L-O-C-K-E-D?
331
00:23:55,034 --> 00:23:57,236
Why are you spelling it?
It's nothing
to be ashamed of,
332
00:23:57,303 --> 00:23:59,639
and there are plenty
of strategies to overcome it.
I'm not blocked.
333
00:23:59,706 --> 00:24:02,074
For instance,
stimulants and narcotics.
I'm not blocked.
334
00:24:02,141 --> 00:24:04,443
For a while there,
Hunter S. Thompson
was permanently unblocked.
335
00:24:04,511 --> 00:24:06,746
- I'm not blocked.
- Until you deliver
that manuscript,
336
00:24:06,813 --> 00:24:08,548
you're still
under contract to me.
337
00:24:08,615 --> 00:24:12,552
So, whatever is going on,
snap out of it, and get writing.
338
00:24:13,119 --> 00:24:14,687
Bye, Jane.
339
00:24:16,422 --> 00:24:18,024
[ Deep Voice ]
"Bye, Jane."
340
00:24:18,090 --> 00:24:20,392
Oh, he's not gone,
has he?
341
00:24:20,459 --> 00:24:23,362
We never got a chance
to talk about my screenplay.
342
00:24:23,429 --> 00:24:26,533
Hi.
The French really appreciate
my work, you know.
343
00:24:26,599 --> 00:24:30,369
Connoisseurs de Cinema.
Oh, aye.
344
00:24:30,436 --> 00:24:32,471
No, we should have him
over for dinner.
345
00:24:32,539 --> 00:24:34,240
Oh. Your wine.
346
00:24:34,306 --> 00:24:35,875
Bathroom.
347
00:24:41,981 --> 00:24:43,983
I know you, don't I?
348
00:24:44,784 --> 00:24:47,153
Where was it we met?
349
00:24:47,219 --> 00:24:49,756
Chapter 2.
I'm in the opening chapter,
of course,
350
00:24:49,822 --> 00:24:53,359
but I'd say you only
really get to know me
from chapter 2 on.
351
00:24:57,429 --> 00:24:59,031
Darsie?
352
00:25:00,533 --> 00:25:02,869
- What do you think?
- I think I'm talking
to my protagonist.
353
00:25:02,935 --> 00:25:04,571
I prefer heroine.
354
00:25:04,637 --> 00:25:06,405
What are you doing here?
355
00:25:06,472 --> 00:25:09,809
Mmm. It's a very
intense narrative.
356
00:25:09,876 --> 00:25:13,646
I personally have suffered
a broken engagement
and two bereavements so far.
357
00:25:13,713 --> 00:25:17,183
- Yes, I know. Sorry.
- No, no, no.
Please don't apologize.
358
00:25:17,249 --> 00:25:20,953
I think it's gonna make me
a stronger person in the end.
359
00:25:21,020 --> 00:25:22,822
The end?
360
00:25:22,889 --> 00:25:25,992
- Yes. So you're gonna
go back and finish it?
- Oh.
361
00:25:27,727 --> 00:25:29,929
I can't do that--
not without you.
362
00:25:29,996 --> 00:25:32,765
Why can't you
finish it, Jane?
363
00:25:32,832 --> 00:25:34,701
Hmm?
364
00:25:34,767 --> 00:25:37,804
What are you afraid of?
365
00:25:50,016 --> 00:25:52,018
[ Sobbing ]
366
00:25:55,154 --> 00:25:57,089
Get a hold of yourself,
will you?
367
00:25:57,156 --> 00:25:59,325
[ Sobs ]
368
00:25:59,391 --> 00:26:01,327
Gets me every time.
369
00:26:01,393 --> 00:26:03,429
Three times now.
370
00:26:05,097 --> 00:26:06,899
It's that ending.
371
00:26:06,966 --> 00:26:09,535
Don't talk to me
about damn endings.
Do your marking.
372
00:26:09,602 --> 00:26:11,370
Okay.
[ Sniffles ]
373
00:26:11,437 --> 00:26:13,172
Being silly.
374
00:26:15,908 --> 00:26:18,978
- Oh. Jane says hi.
- [ Sobs ]
375
00:26:20,579 --> 00:26:23,082
That poor lassie.
376
00:26:23,149 --> 00:26:25,718
She must have led
such a shocking life
to write like that.
377
00:26:25,785 --> 00:26:28,154
What are you saying?
Oh, well,
378
00:26:28,220 --> 00:26:33,159
the lonely page,
the endless introspection,
379
00:26:33,225 --> 00:26:37,363
the mind plagued
by funky thoughts.
380
00:26:38,597 --> 00:26:40,700
It's how writers tick,
isn't it?
381
00:26:40,767 --> 00:26:42,735
No misery, no poetry.
382
00:26:44,937 --> 00:26:47,006
[ Phone Rings ]
383
00:26:53,746 --> 00:26:56,115
- Yeah?
- Did you speak
to Jane Lockhart?
384
00:26:56,182 --> 00:26:58,384
Yes, she's happy.
Very happy.
385
00:26:58,450 --> 00:27:01,053
Happier than she's
ever been apparently.
386
00:27:01,120 --> 00:27:03,389
And the novel?
387
00:27:07,426 --> 00:27:09,361
Tom? Hello?
388
00:27:09,428 --> 00:27:11,430
Are you still there?
389
00:27:14,033 --> 00:27:15,534
Tom?
390
00:27:16,402 --> 00:27:18,437
[ Train Passing Overhead ]
391
00:27:23,843 --> 00:27:28,014
[ Tom ] I have a problem
I believe may be suited
to your particular talents.
392
00:27:28,080 --> 00:27:30,116
Let's say...
393
00:27:31,450 --> 00:27:33,352
a miserable writer,
394
00:27:33,419 --> 00:27:35,788
through the supreme efforts
of her publisher...
395
00:27:35,855 --> 00:27:37,824
and her own meager talent,
396
00:27:37,890 --> 00:27:39,859
becomes successful
and happy.
[ Crowd Cheering ]
397
00:27:39,926 --> 00:27:42,661
- Are you listening?
- Hello, sir.
398
00:27:42,729 --> 00:27:44,430
Amber.
Roxanne.
399
00:27:44,496 --> 00:27:47,399
Out on a school night, sir?
This your boyfriend, sir?
400
00:27:47,466 --> 00:27:49,301
[ Both Chuckling ]
401
00:27:51,470 --> 00:27:54,040
Say nothing. Just keep
very still. You don't want to
antagonize them.
402
00:27:54,106 --> 00:27:56,575
Can we get back
to my problem?
Yeah. Okay.
403
00:27:56,642 --> 00:28:00,246
Yeah. Miserable writer
becomes successful and happy.
I get it. And?
404
00:28:00,312 --> 00:28:05,384
And being happy,
she is unable to finish
her latest miserable novel.
405
00:28:05,451 --> 00:28:07,720
[ Bell Rings ]
So, in order to help her,
406
00:28:07,787 --> 00:28:10,522
the selfless publisher
embarks on a course
of action...
407
00:28:10,589 --> 00:28:12,892
to return her
to the fragile
mental state...
408
00:28:12,959 --> 00:28:15,461
in which she wrote
her highly profitable debut.
409
00:28:17,096 --> 00:28:19,065
You want to make
Jane Lockhart's life
a misery...
410
00:28:19,131 --> 00:28:21,033
so she'll finish
writing her book?
411
00:28:21,100 --> 00:28:22,701
That's seriously messed up.
412
00:28:22,769 --> 00:28:25,805
Do they teach you
this stuff in France?
We study a broad curriculum.
413
00:28:25,872 --> 00:28:30,910
So, how do we make someone
completely, totally miserable?
414
00:28:30,977 --> 00:28:32,979
Why are you asking me?
415
00:28:33,045 --> 00:28:36,916
I've dedicated the last 10 years
to encouraging young minds,
planting hope and aspiration--
416
00:28:36,983 --> 00:28:40,252
Benson, put it away.
Stand in the corner,
and face the wall.
417
00:28:40,319 --> 00:28:41,854
Little shite.
418
00:28:44,723 --> 00:28:47,026
Okay, maybe I have some
experience in the field.
419
00:28:47,093 --> 00:28:50,129
The trick is not simply
to upset her.
420
00:28:50,196 --> 00:28:52,765
You have to get her
in the right mood.
421
00:28:52,832 --> 00:28:56,769
It's a special kind
of misery you want--
melancholy.
422
00:28:56,836 --> 00:29:02,208
That dull sense of dissociation
and alienation that's the source
of every artist's creativity.
423
00:29:02,274 --> 00:29:04,676
It's like drain unblocker
for novelists.
424
00:29:06,712 --> 00:29:08,647
Keats.
Mmm.
425
00:29:08,714 --> 00:29:10,249
John Keats?
Mm-hmm.
426
00:29:10,316 --> 00:29:12,518
Your plan involves
actual poetry?
427
00:29:12,584 --> 00:29:15,487
I think by definition
that makes it a shit plan.
428
00:29:17,056 --> 00:29:19,792
[ Students Murmuring ]
429
00:29:19,859 --> 00:29:23,662
All right.
Settle down, you lot.
Settle down.
430
00:29:23,729 --> 00:29:25,898
William Wordsworth.
431
00:29:27,066 --> 00:29:30,436
Wordsworth was, of course,
432
00:29:30,502 --> 00:29:32,905
the first of the Romantics
to use a MacBook Pro.
433
00:29:34,540 --> 00:29:36,542
[ Typing ]
434
00:29:42,481 --> 00:29:44,483
[ Chuckles ]
435
00:30:00,432 --> 00:30:01,934
Okay.
436
00:30:05,504 --> 00:30:08,074
Careful.
You're gonna
kill that thing.
437
00:30:09,675 --> 00:30:11,677
[ Typing Resumes ]
438
00:30:12,811 --> 00:30:14,813
[ Typewriter Bell Dings ]
439
00:30:18,184 --> 00:30:21,120
You know, it was
a birthday present
from my dad.
440
00:30:22,621 --> 00:30:24,356
He showed up
out of the blue
with a card...
441
00:30:24,423 --> 00:30:27,293
and a baby money plant,
and he said,
442
00:30:28,560 --> 00:30:30,930
"I owe you, darlin'.
443
00:30:30,997 --> 00:30:33,132
I owe you the world."
444
00:30:34,500 --> 00:30:36,002
And, um--
445
00:30:36,835 --> 00:30:39,471
And then he left,
446
00:30:39,538 --> 00:30:42,408
and I didn't see him again
for six years.
447
00:30:44,743 --> 00:30:47,079
How many p's in "deprivation"?
448
00:30:52,151 --> 00:30:53,552
Just one.
449
00:30:53,619 --> 00:30:55,621
Right.
450
00:31:00,993 --> 00:31:03,829
Coffee cake.
Mm-hmm.
451
00:31:03,896 --> 00:31:06,332
That was
your mum's favorite.
I know.
452
00:31:07,866 --> 00:31:11,403
Your mum was a big fan
of cake in general.
453
00:31:12,471 --> 00:31:14,806
She always made a cake
for my birthday.
454
00:31:14,873 --> 00:31:16,375
Aye.
455
00:31:18,444 --> 00:31:21,347
Do you remember
when you were six?
456
00:31:21,413 --> 00:31:24,083
Your mum and I, we took you
to Edinburgh Zoo--
[ Chuckles ]
457
00:31:24,150 --> 00:31:26,318
and the monkeys
threw rotten fruit at us.
458
00:31:26,385 --> 00:31:30,189
I slipped in a bit,
fractured my foot
in three places.
459
00:31:30,256 --> 00:31:32,591
Damn monkeys
were laughing at us.
460
00:31:32,658 --> 00:31:35,594
- Do you remember?
- Yeah. I remember.
461
00:31:39,865 --> 00:31:41,800
That's in your book,
isn't it?
462
00:31:42,568 --> 00:31:44,503
The Happy Thing.
463
00:31:44,570 --> 00:31:46,772
Ending.
It's called Happy Ending.
464
00:31:46,838 --> 00:31:51,210
And-- And, yeah, the main
character does go to the zoo
with her dad, but he's not you.
465
00:31:51,277 --> 00:31:54,146
[ Chuckles ]
And, uh, they're not monkeys.
They're penguins.
466
00:31:56,115 --> 00:31:59,351
The penguins
throw fruit, aye?
467
00:31:59,418 --> 00:32:02,588
It's different.
It's a story, not real life.
468
00:32:02,654 --> 00:32:05,257
You know, they're not the same.
469
00:32:05,324 --> 00:32:07,859
Well, whatever you say.
470
00:32:07,926 --> 00:32:09,695
Damn monkeys.
[ Chuckles ]
471
00:32:09,761 --> 00:32:12,698
[ Chuckles ]
472
00:32:12,764 --> 00:32:14,866
- How's the new book doing?
- Oh, it's cooking.
473
00:32:14,933 --> 00:32:16,502
Aye?
Yep.
474
00:32:16,568 --> 00:32:18,304
And Tommy?
475
00:32:18,370 --> 00:32:20,372
Don't call him Tommy.
476
00:32:20,439 --> 00:32:22,408
His name is Thomas Duval.
He's from Saint-Tropez,
477
00:32:22,474 --> 00:32:24,343
a place they named
a fake tan after.
478
00:32:24,410 --> 00:32:27,113
You call him Tommy, you make him
sound like he's from here,
like he's normal,
479
00:32:27,179 --> 00:32:30,582
with his "oui"--
[ Mutters With French Accent ]
and his stupid stubbly face.
480
00:32:30,649 --> 00:32:32,451
You see a lot of
Thomas Duvals around here?
481
00:32:32,518 --> 00:32:35,988
There's
Jean-Claude Darcheville.
He played for Rangers.
482
00:32:36,055 --> 00:32:38,224
Anyway, forget about Tom.
483
00:32:38,290 --> 00:32:40,926
I'm about to sign
with a new publisher--
Klinsch & McLeish.
484
00:32:40,993 --> 00:32:42,894
You know,
with the red and white covers?
485
00:32:42,961 --> 00:32:44,896
I liked him.
I liked Tom.
486
00:32:44,963 --> 00:32:48,434
Dad.
I mean, nobody else wanted
your wee book, did they?
487
00:32:48,500 --> 00:32:50,569
I mean,
he showed faith in you.
488
00:32:50,636 --> 00:32:52,371
No, he showed faith in my book.
489
00:32:52,438 --> 00:32:54,673
You know he changed
my original title?
Did he?
490
00:32:54,740 --> 00:32:56,508
- Yep.
- Was it a good title?
491
00:32:56,575 --> 00:33:00,046
That's not the point.
What was it?
What was the original title?
492
00:33:00,112 --> 00:33:02,348
Uh, nothing. Nothing.
It doesn't matter. It's--
493
00:33:02,414 --> 00:33:04,483
Oh, tell me.
494
00:33:04,550 --> 00:33:07,786
I mean, I like that kind
of stuff. You know, stuff that
other people don't know.
495
00:33:07,853 --> 00:33:10,689
It makes me feel
closer to you.
496
00:33:11,390 --> 00:33:12,991
Okay. But--
Okay.
497
00:33:13,059 --> 00:33:15,594
I was gonna call it...
498
00:33:15,661 --> 00:33:18,130
The Endless Anguish
of My Father.
499
00:33:21,200 --> 00:33:23,635
For fuck's sake!
500
00:33:23,702 --> 00:33:26,805
The Endless Anguish
of My Father?
501
00:33:27,773 --> 00:33:29,641
I knew it was about me.
I knew it.
502
00:33:29,708 --> 00:33:31,643
Well, no,
it's not about you.
503
00:33:31,710 --> 00:33:35,681
- It's a character I made up.
- People at work looked at me
differently when it came out.
504
00:33:35,747 --> 00:33:37,883
I knew it!
I'm away back to the depot.
505
00:33:37,949 --> 00:33:39,751
No, you never read it.
506
00:33:39,818 --> 00:33:43,789
You're not allowed to be hurt
until you've actually
read the damn thing.
507
00:33:43,855 --> 00:33:47,426
Do you not think I'm hurt
my own dad hasn't
read my novel?
508
00:33:48,660 --> 00:33:50,862
Hey. I will read it.
509
00:33:50,929 --> 00:33:54,933
I'll read it just as soon
as I get over my anguish.
510
00:33:57,836 --> 00:33:59,305
Dad?
511
00:34:14,052 --> 00:34:15,987
Target acquired. Over.
512
00:34:16,054 --> 00:34:18,257
It's a pot plant, Roddy,
513
00:34:18,324 --> 00:34:20,359
not a North Korean reactor.
514
00:34:21,460 --> 00:34:23,895
Just warn me
if either of them comes back.
515
00:34:23,962 --> 00:34:25,964
Roger that.
Understood loud and clear.
516
00:34:26,865 --> 00:34:29,668
That is a solid copy.
517
00:34:29,735 --> 00:34:31,403
Ah!
518
00:34:37,476 --> 00:34:41,313
Right. Time for
some low-level unhappiness.
519
00:34:47,386 --> 00:34:48,387
Mmm.
520
00:34:53,925 --> 00:34:55,961
Twilight Sad.
521
00:35:03,635 --> 00:35:05,671
Hey, Roddy, are you there?
522
00:35:17,449 --> 00:35:19,618
[ Chuckles ]
523
00:35:24,856 --> 00:35:27,092
Maverick to Iceman.
524
00:35:28,560 --> 00:35:30,162
We are Oscar Mike.
525
00:35:32,764 --> 00:35:34,833
Five klicks
from extraction point.
526
00:35:37,035 --> 00:35:39,338
We have a clean visual on--
Bollocks.
527
00:35:39,405 --> 00:35:42,508
Uh, Tom? Tom?
Tom, she-she's back.
528
00:35:43,642 --> 00:35:45,611
- What?
- She's coming up the stairs.
529
00:35:45,677 --> 00:35:47,346
Shit.
530
00:35:47,413 --> 00:35:49,415
Damn it, man.
Get out of there.
531
00:35:49,481 --> 00:35:51,116
Abort! Abort!
532
00:36:29,154 --> 00:36:30,989
[ Hinges Squeak Softly ]
533
00:36:31,056 --> 00:36:32,891
[ Door Closes ]
534
00:36:47,038 --> 00:36:50,476
Oh, that's horrible.
She's really upset.
I'm not looking at that.
535
00:36:53,912 --> 00:36:54,980
Yes.
536
00:36:55,046 --> 00:36:57,683
Oh! What was that for?
537
00:36:58,917 --> 00:37:01,019
You're enjoying this
too much.
538
00:37:01,086 --> 00:37:02,654
It's for her own good.
539
00:37:04,856 --> 00:37:07,659
And it's not as if
I actually killed her plant.
540
00:37:16,935 --> 00:37:19,771
[ Engine Sputtering ]
541
00:37:34,786 --> 00:37:38,123
[ Typing ]
542
00:38:01,046 --> 00:38:03,315
[ Typing ]
543
00:38:05,016 --> 00:38:07,819
- So what do you think?
- I think this is the end
of Les Misérables.
544
00:38:07,886 --> 00:38:09,921
Yes. You should write
something like that.
545
00:38:09,988 --> 00:38:12,591
Oh, yeah, thank you.
Great suggestion.
546
00:38:12,658 --> 00:38:15,361
Bit French.
People dying of consumption
and all that.
547
00:38:15,427 --> 00:38:19,264
I'm a bit more
urban Scotland. Primal Scream.
Unhappy '90s childhood.
548
00:38:19,331 --> 00:38:21,199
- Sorry?
- She wasn't talking to you.
549
00:38:22,401 --> 00:38:24,503
I wasn't talking to you.
550
00:38:24,570 --> 00:38:26,271
Oh.
551
00:38:26,338 --> 00:38:28,440
[ Typing Resumes ]
552
00:38:31,977 --> 00:38:33,579
Willie?
Hmm?
553
00:38:35,447 --> 00:38:38,016
Do your characters ever, uh,
554
00:38:38,083 --> 00:38:39,985
talk to you?
555
00:38:40,051 --> 00:38:42,120
Sure.
All the time.
556
00:38:42,187 --> 00:38:45,457
That's why I've got this.
Drowns out the bastards.
557
00:38:45,524 --> 00:38:50,028
See, when I'm writing,
I like to hear the one voice--
mine.
558
00:38:50,095 --> 00:38:51,296
Charming.
559
00:38:51,363 --> 00:38:52,731
Quite the hero.
560
00:38:52,798 --> 00:38:55,634
Aw. Are you still blocked?
561
00:38:55,701 --> 00:38:57,068
[ Whines ]
562
00:38:57,135 --> 00:38:59,137
[ Typing Resumes ]
563
00:38:59,204 --> 00:39:00,506
[ Mutters ]
564
00:39:00,572 --> 00:39:03,208
** [ Rock ]
565
00:39:03,274 --> 00:39:06,412
[ Men ]
* Hey, hey, hey, hey *
566
00:39:06,478 --> 00:39:09,214
* Hey, hey,
hey, hey *
567
00:39:09,280 --> 00:39:12,451
* Hey, hey, hey, hey *
568
00:39:12,518 --> 00:39:14,052
* Hey, hey *
569
00:39:14,119 --> 00:39:16,688
* What would you say? **
570
00:39:17,989 --> 00:39:20,426
101 Ways to Beat Writer's Block?
571
00:39:23,328 --> 00:39:25,330
Beat Your Block to a Pulp?
572
00:39:27,966 --> 00:39:29,735
[ Chuckles ]
573
00:39:29,801 --> 00:39:32,170
What Would Jesus Write?
Seriously?
574
00:39:32,237 --> 00:39:34,005
[ Chuckles ]
Okay.
575
00:39:34,072 --> 00:39:36,908
Okay, so what's the deal?
Are you gonna stalk me
until I finish my novel?
576
00:39:36,975 --> 00:39:38,944
Yes, I believe
that's how it works.
577
00:39:39,010 --> 00:39:42,080
- Now, can we talk
about the last chapter?
- What about it?
578
00:39:42,147 --> 00:39:44,816
I'm a romantic heroine.
I don't want to end up unhappy.
579
00:39:44,883 --> 00:39:47,352
It's not that easy.
You don't really
get to choose your ending.
580
00:39:47,419 --> 00:39:50,088
It has to follow
from what came before,
or it doesn't feel true.
581
00:39:50,155 --> 00:39:51,790
Please?
582
00:39:51,857 --> 00:39:54,426
I want it all
to turn out okay.
Jane,
583
00:39:54,493 --> 00:39:57,663
don't let us down,
darling.
Jane Lockhart.
584
00:39:57,729 --> 00:39:58,897
Mm-hmm?
585
00:39:58,964 --> 00:40:01,166
I thought
it was you.
Oh.
586
00:40:01,232 --> 00:40:04,269
Shona Heywood,
proprietor of Mocha Books.
Wow.
587
00:40:04,335 --> 00:40:06,472
Can I just say
it's such a pleasure...
588
00:40:06,538 --> 00:40:08,840
to meet the woman
who helped pay for
my new kitchen.
589
00:40:08,907 --> 00:40:10,476
[ Both Chuckle ]
590
00:40:10,542 --> 00:40:13,311
It is. It's her.
It's her. It's her. It's her.
591
00:40:13,378 --> 00:40:16,882
I just lo-o-o-oved
Happy Ending.
592
00:40:16,948 --> 00:40:18,216
It's so sad.
593
00:40:18,283 --> 00:40:20,318
I can't wait for
your next one.
What's it called?
594
00:40:20,385 --> 00:40:22,087
Is it finished yet?
595
00:40:22,153 --> 00:40:24,222
Well, um,
it's gonna be, um--
It must be difficult.
596
00:40:24,289 --> 00:40:25,991
I mean,
so much to live up to.
597
00:40:26,057 --> 00:40:30,195
How do you come back
after the extraordinary
success of Happy Ending?
598
00:40:31,863 --> 00:40:35,801
Ah-ah-ah. We are
interrupting the muse.
599
00:40:35,867 --> 00:40:38,169
- I'm sure you're eager
to get back to the page.
- Oh, yes.
600
00:40:38,236 --> 00:40:40,405
And I have my eye on
a gorgeous bathroom.
601
00:40:40,472 --> 00:40:43,141
[ All Chuckling ]
602
00:40:43,208 --> 00:40:45,477
Please, take that,
with my compliments.
Oh, thank you.
603
00:40:45,544 --> 00:40:48,146
I just need to run that
through the till.
No!
604
00:40:49,414 --> 00:40:51,049
Blocked?
[ All Gasp ]
605
00:40:51,116 --> 00:40:53,084
[ All Murmuring ]
606
00:40:57,589 --> 00:40:59,157
[ Clicks Tongue ]
607
00:40:59,858 --> 00:41:02,761
[ Clicking Rapidly ]
608
00:41:06,231 --> 00:41:08,199
[ Doorbell Rings ]
609
00:41:19,678 --> 00:41:21,613
Dad.
610
00:41:21,680 --> 00:41:24,349
Come in.
I was just making strudel.
611
00:41:24,415 --> 00:41:26,785
Oh, I can't stay anyway.
612
00:41:26,852 --> 00:41:27,986
Uh--
613
00:41:29,087 --> 00:41:31,590
I just wanted to say--
614
00:41:33,491 --> 00:41:37,028
I had it--
I had it in my head
what I was going to say.
615
00:41:39,330 --> 00:41:42,067
I don't suppose
you're ever stuck for words.
616
00:41:44,670 --> 00:41:46,404
Listen.
617
00:41:47,338 --> 00:41:48,907
We don't really
know each other.
618
00:41:48,974 --> 00:41:52,744
And I would like
to-- to get to know you.
619
00:41:52,811 --> 00:41:56,214
And I'm make--
I'm making a mess
of it again.
620
00:41:56,281 --> 00:41:58,984
The other day,
in the cemetery, uh--
621
00:42:00,552 --> 00:42:02,554
I was out of order.
622
00:42:04,055 --> 00:42:05,791
I was, and I'm sorry.
623
00:42:05,857 --> 00:42:07,626
I'm really sorry, darlin'.
624
00:42:08,894 --> 00:42:11,763
Right, that's it.
I've said it.
And, uh,
625
00:42:11,830 --> 00:42:15,333
I'm going to go
and meet the boys
for quiz practice.
626
00:42:15,400 --> 00:42:17,803
I'm off. Right. Okay.
I'm off.
627
00:42:17,869 --> 00:42:19,504
Dad?
628
00:42:24,843 --> 00:42:30,348
It's okay. Look. I know--
I know how complicated
all of this is, and, uh--
629
00:42:32,250 --> 00:42:34,319
Can I be on your quiz team?
630
00:42:41,893 --> 00:42:46,598
I think you're maybe
a bit busy
for a daft quiz team.
631
00:42:49,267 --> 00:42:50,769
Please.
632
00:42:52,103 --> 00:42:53,872
I'd like to...
633
00:42:53,939 --> 00:42:55,774
get to know you.
634
00:42:57,242 --> 00:42:59,544
- Really?
- Really.
635
00:43:02,748 --> 00:43:04,215
Great.
636
00:43:05,383 --> 00:43:07,953
Great. We need you.
637
00:43:08,019 --> 00:43:10,488
[ Laughing ]
Rory's showing signs
of early dementia.
638
00:43:12,023 --> 00:43:14,192
That would be great.
639
00:43:30,475 --> 00:43:32,844
[ Gasps ]
Welcome to the family.
640
00:43:32,911 --> 00:43:34,746
Thanks.
Thanks so much.
641
00:43:34,813 --> 00:43:37,015
Please excuse Dr. Klinsch.
642
00:43:37,082 --> 00:43:41,486
She does have a tendency
to pee her pants
whenever we sign a new author.
643
00:43:41,552 --> 00:43:44,022
- That was just the one time.
- Okay.
644
00:43:44,089 --> 00:43:48,393
So, Klinsch & McLeish.
I-- I can't quite believe it.
645
00:43:48,459 --> 00:43:51,663
I'm gonna be published
in one of those classic
red and white covers.
646
00:43:51,730 --> 00:43:55,366
It's obviously not
just about the covers,
but they're so pretty.
647
00:43:55,433 --> 00:43:58,036
And your list is amazing too.
I mean, you publish Glen Buchan.
648
00:43:58,103 --> 00:44:00,038
Ah, Glen.
Fabulous writer.
649
00:44:00,105 --> 00:44:02,941
And you know that you have
something in common?
Really?
650
00:44:03,008 --> 00:44:04,976
No. What?
You think so?
651
00:44:05,043 --> 00:44:08,579
God, he's up there
with Rushdie and McEwan.
652
00:44:10,181 --> 00:44:11,950
Quite possibly.
653
00:44:12,017 --> 00:44:15,653
No, what I meant was that
you were both discovered
by your former publisher.
654
00:44:15,721 --> 00:44:17,689
Tom?
Yes, it didn't last.
655
00:44:17,756 --> 00:44:22,127
They went their separate ways
before the first novel
was published-- by us.
656
00:44:22,193 --> 00:44:25,030
Oh. Well, yeah.
Sounds like Tom.
657
00:44:25,096 --> 00:44:26,865
Anyway,
enough of the past.
658
00:44:26,932 --> 00:44:28,734
Here's to the future.
659
00:44:28,800 --> 00:44:30,869
Whew!
660
00:44:38,376 --> 00:44:40,311
It's exciting.
661
00:44:49,955 --> 00:44:51,990
[ Darsie ]
Blocked in this too, eh?
662
00:45:01,032 --> 00:45:04,435
I'm so sorry.
Would you excuse us--
uh, me, for just one second?
663
00:45:04,502 --> 00:45:06,337
Where's your bathroom?
Uh--
664
00:45:09,140 --> 00:45:12,143
- Okay, what are you doing here?
- Well, I figured out
what's going on.
665
00:45:14,012 --> 00:45:16,214
You can't write the ending
because once it's finished,
666
00:45:16,281 --> 00:45:18,583
you'll have no reason
to see Tom ever again.
667
00:45:18,649 --> 00:45:21,086
[ Laughing ]
668
00:45:21,152 --> 00:45:24,089
Oh, that is such
a load of rubbish.
669
00:45:24,155 --> 00:45:26,825
- [ Knocking ]
- Jane, dear?
670
00:45:26,892 --> 00:45:30,295
- Is everything all right?
- Uh, yep. Yep. Fine.
I'll just be out in a minute.
671
00:45:30,929 --> 00:45:32,497
Ah.
672
00:45:34,699 --> 00:45:38,837
In case you haven't noticed,
I'm about to leave Tom
and sign with a new publisher.
673
00:45:38,904 --> 00:45:43,374
Oh, and one more minor detail--
I'm not writing my ending.
I'm writing yours.
674
00:45:43,441 --> 00:45:45,376
And I'm not you.
No, of course not.
675
00:45:45,443 --> 00:45:47,745
And your first novel
wasn't a barely
fictionalized account...
676
00:45:47,813 --> 00:45:49,981
of your relationship
with your father.
677
00:45:50,048 --> 00:45:53,084
Oh, and remind me,
what's your middle name again?
Jane Darsie Lockhart.
678
00:45:53,151 --> 00:45:57,856
Well, that means nothing.
And anyway, I was thinking of
changing your name, so you--
679
00:46:02,060 --> 00:46:04,362
Still here.
[ Groans ]
680
00:46:07,933 --> 00:46:09,767
Sorry. I'm so sorry.
681
00:46:09,835 --> 00:46:12,003
Ah. Now then, young lady.
682
00:46:12,070 --> 00:46:15,173
Ready to go
with a real publisher,
hmm?
683
00:46:16,341 --> 00:46:17,708
Um--
684
00:46:26,151 --> 00:46:28,019
[ Roddy ]
Huh! Let me
get this straight.
685
00:46:28,086 --> 00:46:29,821
You only take on
writers you love?
686
00:46:29,888 --> 00:46:31,756
Writing I love.
687
00:46:31,823 --> 00:46:33,925
How interesting.
688
00:46:33,992 --> 00:46:36,061
No, no, it isn't.
689
00:46:36,127 --> 00:46:39,497
Can we get back
to making Jane miserable?
690
00:46:39,564 --> 00:46:42,433
Fine. If that's
what you really want.
691
00:46:42,500 --> 00:46:45,070
Have you thought about
what will happen if you succeed?
692
00:46:46,604 --> 00:46:48,106
Yeah.
693
00:46:48,974 --> 00:46:50,375
I win.
694
00:46:50,441 --> 00:46:53,778
Yes.
But you'll lose her.
695
00:46:53,845 --> 00:46:57,782
Who cares?
It's not as if
she wants to stay.
696
00:47:01,286 --> 00:47:03,021
** [ Dramatic Instrumental ]
697
00:47:03,088 --> 00:47:05,690
[ Man On Tape ]
Motivation,
the heart of self-improvement.
698
00:47:05,756 --> 00:47:10,195
"A"-- Achieve your dreams.
Avoid negative people,
things and places.
699
00:47:10,261 --> 00:47:13,364
"B"-- Believe in yourself
and in what you can do.
700
00:47:13,431 --> 00:47:17,735
"C"-- Consider things
on every angle and aspect.
Motivation comes from--
701
00:47:17,802 --> 00:47:19,905
One of us really
needs to get laid.
702
00:47:19,971 --> 00:47:22,240
Oh, God, yes.
703
00:47:23,975 --> 00:47:25,743
We should-- next week.
704
00:47:25,810 --> 00:47:27,879
We'll get--
There's a girl at the chippy.
705
00:47:29,714 --> 00:47:33,284
"Q"-- Quitters never win,
and winners never quit.
706
00:47:33,351 --> 00:47:37,522
So choose your fate.
Are you going to be
a quitter or a winner?
707
00:47:37,588 --> 00:47:39,157
"R"--
708
00:47:39,224 --> 00:47:42,793
Okay. Here's a thought.
We could kill her dog.
709
00:47:42,860 --> 00:47:44,829
I didn't know
she had a dog.
She doesn't.
710
00:47:44,896 --> 00:47:47,165
We could buy her one
and then kill it.
711
00:47:48,566 --> 00:47:50,501
It wouldn't be
a cute dog.
712
00:47:50,568 --> 00:47:54,072
And you don't think
that's a little bit--
how can I put this-- psychotic?
713
00:47:54,139 --> 00:47:58,109
Yeah, you're right.
She hasn't got a dog.
714
00:47:59,978 --> 00:48:02,480
But she has got
a screenwriter.
715
00:48:02,547 --> 00:48:05,316
I'm not helping you
kill Willie Scott, am I?
716
00:48:06,384 --> 00:48:07,919
Tom.
717
00:48:10,688 --> 00:48:12,690
[ Chattering ]
718
00:48:21,899 --> 00:48:24,702
- Uh, she wants to interview me?
- [ Indistinct ]
719
00:48:25,736 --> 00:48:27,405
Damn it.
720
00:48:27,472 --> 00:48:29,440
She's still baking.
721
00:48:30,308 --> 00:48:32,743
Back,
you cupcakes of Satan.
722
00:48:33,911 --> 00:48:36,181
Okay. Here goes.
723
00:48:48,994 --> 00:48:51,929
I hate these things.
Mmm.
724
00:48:51,997 --> 00:48:56,034
Yeah, I prefer
the Routemaster 2670 myself.
725
00:48:58,869 --> 00:49:01,239
It's a bus joke.
Sorry.
726
00:49:04,375 --> 00:49:07,945
No, no.
I-- I get it.
It's, um--
727
00:49:08,013 --> 00:49:13,051
It's just I've never
really met anyone else
who made a bus joke before.
728
00:49:20,325 --> 00:49:22,193
Hello, Jane.
Oh.
729
00:49:22,260 --> 00:49:24,029
Hello.
What do you want?
730
00:49:24,095 --> 00:49:26,697
I'll tell you
what I don't want.
731
00:49:26,764 --> 00:49:28,466
[ Groans ]
732
00:49:28,533 --> 00:49:30,535
I don't want a cupcake.
733
00:49:30,601 --> 00:49:35,073
So, two writers
living under the same roof--
how's that working out?
734
00:49:35,140 --> 00:49:36,741
Oh--
I bet it's fantastic.
735
00:49:36,807 --> 00:49:39,777
Sharing ideas,
the ebb and flow
of discussion.
736
00:49:39,844 --> 00:49:42,247
Willie must be
a great boon.
Oh, yes.
737
00:49:42,313 --> 00:49:46,251
- Yes, he is.
- So, what does the big man
make of the new novel?
738
00:49:48,053 --> 00:49:51,022
You're right.
It's not fair to ask you.
I should ask him.
739
00:49:51,089 --> 00:49:53,524
No, no, no.
He loves it.
He just loves it.
740
00:49:53,591 --> 00:49:56,261
Naturally
he has notes.
Naturally.
741
00:50:00,331 --> 00:50:03,968
Willie has not asked
to read one single page,
has he?
742
00:50:04,035 --> 00:50:06,037
Well, he's very busy
with his screenplay.
743
00:50:06,104 --> 00:50:08,806
Ah, yes. The adaptation.
How's that going?
744
00:50:08,873 --> 00:50:11,942
Terrific.
Oh, it's going terrifically.
745
00:50:13,811 --> 00:50:15,813
You don't know, do you?
746
00:50:17,848 --> 00:50:20,418
He doesn't discuss it
with you.
747
00:50:20,485 --> 00:50:22,353
What's your point?
He's using you.
748
00:50:22,420 --> 00:50:25,090
[ Chuckles ]
That's rich,
coming from you.
749
00:50:25,156 --> 00:50:27,458
[ Grunts ]
Come on.
It's common knowledge...
750
00:50:27,525 --> 00:50:30,428
he wouldn't be
adapting Happy Ending
if you hadn't insisted.
751
00:50:30,495 --> 00:50:35,566
- Oh, yeah?
- Willie Scott's writing career
peaked sometime around 1998.
752
00:50:35,633 --> 00:50:38,403
He's a talentless hack,
without a brain
or a conscience...
753
00:50:38,469 --> 00:50:42,307
who doesn't give a damn
about you or your novel!
754
00:50:43,808 --> 00:50:45,076
Um--
Yeah?
755
00:50:45,143 --> 00:50:46,644
Behind you.
756
00:50:50,381 --> 00:50:52,250
Hey.
757
00:50:52,317 --> 00:50:53,918
Willie!
758
00:51:05,062 --> 00:51:06,697
[ Gasps ]
759
00:51:09,467 --> 00:51:11,602
[ Whines ]
760
00:51:18,276 --> 00:51:21,045
- Is that fruitcake?
- Oh. Yeah.
[ Chuckles ]
761
00:51:21,112 --> 00:51:22,780
It's frozen.
[ Clanks ]
762
00:51:22,847 --> 00:51:24,849
I brought a couple of spares.
It's for your nose.
763
00:51:26,451 --> 00:51:29,086
Look.
I'm sorry about Willie.
764
00:51:29,154 --> 00:51:32,123
He shouldn't have hit you,
even though
you did deserve it.
765
00:51:33,791 --> 00:51:36,361
He caught me off guard.
766
00:51:36,427 --> 00:51:38,963
Usually I don't go down
after the first punch.
767
00:51:39,029 --> 00:51:43,000
Usually it's about
the third or fourth.
Mm-hmm.
768
00:51:43,868 --> 00:51:46,003
How did I get here?
769
00:51:46,070 --> 00:51:49,140
Oh, I made Willie carry you.
770
00:51:49,207 --> 00:51:51,709
No, you didn't.
What?
What's wrong now?
771
00:51:51,776 --> 00:51:53,711
It's not very manly,
772
00:51:53,778 --> 00:51:56,681
being carried upstairs
by another bloke.
773
00:51:57,748 --> 00:51:59,550
He's not still here, is he?
774
00:51:59,617 --> 00:52:01,886
No, I sent him outside
to calm down.
775
00:52:05,890 --> 00:52:07,725
[ Clears Throat ]
776
00:52:09,727 --> 00:52:11,229
Look, Jane.
777
00:52:11,296 --> 00:52:13,698
There's something
I need to tell you.
778
00:52:15,400 --> 00:52:17,702
Something
I've never said before.
779
00:52:21,739 --> 00:52:24,242
What's the capital of Ethiopia?
780
00:52:30,014 --> 00:52:32,217
1,001 Trivia Questions?
781
00:52:32,283 --> 00:52:33,951
What's this for?
782
00:52:34,018 --> 00:52:35,953
Your dad hasn't--
783
00:52:36,020 --> 00:52:40,358
You're on the team.
We're in the finals,
actually.
784
00:52:41,959 --> 00:52:44,094
So that was it.
785
00:52:45,162 --> 00:52:47,465
That's what
you needed to say?
786
00:52:48,366 --> 00:52:50,000
No.
787
00:52:50,067 --> 00:52:52,703
No, no, no.
788
00:52:55,906 --> 00:52:57,408
I--
789
00:52:59,777 --> 00:53:01,712
What I meant to say is...
790
00:53:02,780 --> 00:53:04,582
Happy Ending--
791
00:53:04,649 --> 00:53:06,150
Mm-hmm?
792
00:53:06,217 --> 00:53:10,621
At the end,
when things became,
you know,
793
00:53:10,688 --> 00:53:12,657
with us--
794
00:53:15,660 --> 00:53:17,295
And the title.
795
00:53:22,032 --> 00:53:24,034
I never told you--
796
00:53:25,336 --> 00:53:26,971
The book--
797
00:53:30,040 --> 00:53:32,009
It's good.
798
00:53:34,512 --> 00:53:38,182
It's like the saddest music
I've ever heard.
799
00:53:44,188 --> 00:53:47,325
What the hell was that?
What are you up to?
800
00:53:47,392 --> 00:53:49,093
I'm not up to anything.
Yes, you are.
801
00:53:49,159 --> 00:53:53,163
All this "sad music" crap
and filling my head
with doubts about Willie.
802
00:53:53,230 --> 00:53:55,600
Why would you do that?
Why? Unless--
803
00:53:55,666 --> 00:53:57,902
[ Gasps ]
Unless--
804
00:53:59,036 --> 00:54:00,705
Oh, I know why.
805
00:54:00,771 --> 00:54:03,641
You want me to sign
a new book deal with you.
806
00:54:03,708 --> 00:54:06,344
Well, if you can hear me
through the obvious concussion,
807
00:54:06,411 --> 00:54:10,548
pay attention,
it is never going to happen.
808
00:54:10,615 --> 00:54:13,784
- I have a concussion?
- Oh, get off.
Get off this bus.
809
00:54:17,288 --> 00:54:19,757
You know what?
810
00:54:19,824 --> 00:54:22,226
You really think
I'd want you back?
811
00:54:22,293 --> 00:54:24,161
Why?
812
00:54:24,228 --> 00:54:27,031
Why would I do that to myself?
813
00:54:27,097 --> 00:54:29,033
You're distant
at the best of times.
814
00:54:29,099 --> 00:54:33,137
And when you're writing,
your characters were
more real to you than I was.
815
00:54:33,203 --> 00:54:35,139
[ Clears Throat ]
816
00:54:41,446 --> 00:54:43,414
So, no, Jane.
817
00:54:44,248 --> 00:54:46,717
I do not want you back.
818
00:54:46,784 --> 00:54:49,354
I do not want you back.
819
00:54:50,788 --> 00:54:53,591
[ Typewriter Bell Dings ]
[ Typing ]
820
00:54:59,330 --> 00:55:02,733
So, how's the screenplay
coming along?
821
00:55:02,800 --> 00:55:05,169
Hmm?
Your screenplay.
822
00:55:05,235 --> 00:55:09,206
I was just thinking,
we haven't really
discussed it much... at all.
823
00:55:09,273 --> 00:55:13,711
And, uh, since, well,
I wrote the novel,
maybe I could, you know--
824
00:55:13,778 --> 00:55:18,248
What I mean is,
we should have more...
ebb and flow.
825
00:55:18,315 --> 00:55:20,885
That's not a bad idea.
826
00:55:20,951 --> 00:55:23,821
You know the scene
in the book where the father
goes on a bender...
827
00:55:23,888 --> 00:55:25,990
and doesn't turn up
for the mother's funeral?
828
00:55:26,056 --> 00:55:28,292
Yeah.
829
00:55:28,359 --> 00:55:30,461
- I remember.
- Would you miss it?
830
00:55:33,030 --> 00:55:35,232
What? You-- What?
831
00:55:35,299 --> 00:55:37,468
You can't--
832
00:55:37,535 --> 00:55:40,137
Willie,
I think we need to talk
this through.
833
00:55:40,204 --> 00:55:44,609
I know what this is about,
Janey. You haven't written
a word in two weeks.
834
00:55:44,675 --> 00:55:48,779
So you want to talk,
instead of dealing
with your blockage.
835
00:55:48,846 --> 00:55:50,681
How many times?
I am not blocked.
836
00:55:50,748 --> 00:55:53,017
There was this writer I knew,
837
00:55:53,083 --> 00:55:56,454
got stuck
on a long-lost sibling
story arc.
838
00:55:56,521 --> 00:56:00,791
Thought it was the end
of his career, but--
but he beat it.
839
00:56:00,858 --> 00:56:03,828
Do you know how?
How?
840
00:56:06,764 --> 00:56:08,599
He wrote naked.
841
00:56:10,300 --> 00:56:11,602
Yeah.
842
00:56:11,669 --> 00:56:13,671
Yeah, right.
Seriously.
843
00:56:13,738 --> 00:56:17,041
The idea is you release yourself
from the restrictions
of the everyday...
844
00:56:17,107 --> 00:56:20,945
so you can express your ideas
in an uninhibited fashion.
845
00:56:21,011 --> 00:56:24,782
Oh, okay. I think
you just want to be able
to sit there and write...
846
00:56:24,849 --> 00:56:26,617
while you stare at my tits.
847
00:56:27,852 --> 00:56:31,121
They are great tits.
[ Clicks Tongue ]
848
00:56:42,399 --> 00:56:44,635
[ Chattering ]
849
00:56:44,702 --> 00:56:46,471
- [ Whistle Blows ]
- Yeah! Come on!
850
00:56:46,537 --> 00:56:49,006
** [ Rock ]
851
00:56:49,073 --> 00:56:50,808
It's not a weapon, Jade.
852
00:56:53,544 --> 00:56:55,480
There's some blood
on this stick.
853
00:56:55,546 --> 00:56:57,982
Yeah, let's pass
to the other team, Shona.
854
00:57:04,388 --> 00:57:06,657
That's it. Well played.
Well played.
855
00:57:06,724 --> 00:57:08,659
[ Phone Rings ]
[ Whistle Blows ]
856
00:57:08,726 --> 00:57:10,394
[ Shouts ]
857
00:57:10,461 --> 00:57:11,862
Tom.
858
00:57:11,929 --> 00:57:15,165
** [ Continues ]
859
00:57:18,368 --> 00:57:20,170
I've got some business
to take care of.
860
00:57:23,440 --> 00:57:25,442
** [ Continues ]
861
00:57:32,416 --> 00:57:33,984
[ Door Closes ]
862
00:57:34,051 --> 00:57:35,653
** [ Fades ]
863
00:57:35,720 --> 00:57:39,524
[ Panting ]
I want it on record that
this is going too far, okay?
864
00:57:39,590 --> 00:57:41,792
She's only just started
rebuilding her relationship
with her dad.
865
00:57:41,859 --> 00:57:44,261
I'm just trying to help her
finish her book.
866
00:57:44,328 --> 00:57:46,230
And she'll thank me
in the end.
867
00:57:46,296 --> 00:57:50,501
First we get rid of Willie,
then we work on papa.
868
00:57:50,568 --> 00:57:53,671
[ Roddy, With American Accent ]
So, Mr. Scott-- Willie--
869
00:57:53,738 --> 00:57:58,175
our senior development executive
has been looking for a--
870
00:57:58,242 --> 00:58:00,878
a very special screenwriter
with a distinctive voice...
871
00:58:00,945 --> 00:58:04,982
for a project which
she has slated for next year.
872
00:58:05,049 --> 00:58:07,552
Yeah?
When she heard
you were adapting...
873
00:58:07,618 --> 00:58:11,622
Jane Lockhart's Happy Ending,
she was-- she was excited.
874
00:58:11,689 --> 00:58:14,458
We were-- We were all excited.
875
00:58:14,525 --> 00:58:17,027
Uh, what company
is this again?
876
00:58:17,094 --> 00:58:19,096
I mean, have you spoken
to my agent, or, uh--
877
00:58:19,163 --> 00:58:21,866
[ Tom ]
Yeah. Thank you, Priscilla.
You too. Ciao, ciao, ciao.
878
00:58:21,932 --> 00:58:24,902
Sure.
She put us right on to you.
879
00:58:24,969 --> 00:58:29,239
Uh, but if you're
too busy right now,
perhaps we should just leave it?
880
00:58:29,306 --> 00:58:31,742
Oh, no, no, no, no, no. No.
881
00:58:31,809 --> 00:58:34,211
No.
[ Chuckles ]
No, no. I'm excited.
882
00:58:34,278 --> 00:58:35,913
It's, um--
[ Clears Throat ]
883
00:58:35,980 --> 00:58:38,515
You know, it's not just, uh--
just adaptations that I do.
884
00:58:38,583 --> 00:58:40,384
I mean,
I have my own material,
you know.
885
00:58:40,450 --> 00:58:43,588
Terrific.
Well, uh, we, uh--
886
00:58:43,654 --> 00:58:46,991
You-You-You can share
all that with our, uh,
887
00:58:47,057 --> 00:58:49,459
Senior V.P. Bob...
888
00:58:49,526 --> 00:58:53,631
and our head of deputy
acquisitions Vonda, who--
889
00:58:53,698 --> 00:58:55,933
They're gonna be
over there next Friday.
890
00:58:56,000 --> 00:58:57,935
You live in London, right?
891
00:58:58,002 --> 00:58:59,937
Uh, well, uh, mainly,
but, you know,
892
00:59:00,004 --> 00:59:03,307
I've got my place up-country
too, you know, obviously.
[ Chuckles ]
893
00:59:03,373 --> 00:59:07,311
Well, apologies,
but it may involve dragging you
out to the middle of nowhere,
894
00:59:07,377 --> 00:59:10,748
um, but we're scouting
Steven's next pic.
895
00:59:10,815 --> 00:59:13,450
Steven... Seagal?
896
00:59:13,517 --> 00:59:14,852
Soderbergh.
897
00:59:14,919 --> 00:59:17,588
He'll probably drop by
to say hi, if that's okay?
898
00:59:17,655 --> 00:59:20,457
Aye! That would be fine.
899
00:59:20,524 --> 00:59:23,193
[ Bells Ringing ]
900
00:59:23,260 --> 00:59:26,330
[ Horn Honks ]
901
00:59:26,396 --> 00:59:29,033
Taxi's here.
Oh, where's my ticket?
902
00:59:29,099 --> 00:59:31,368
Oh, it's in your bag
where you put it
two minutes ago.
903
00:59:31,435 --> 00:59:34,538
Ah, Jane, this is
an important trip for me.
904
00:59:34,605 --> 00:59:36,340
These people
are working with Soderbergh.
905
00:59:36,406 --> 00:59:39,243
They called me,
and that just never happens.
906
00:59:39,309 --> 00:59:41,812
You're right.
It doesn't.
907
00:59:42,913 --> 00:59:45,249
And it's all because of you.
908
00:59:45,315 --> 00:59:48,218
The truth is
they would never
have asked to see me...
909
00:59:48,285 --> 00:59:50,120
if I hadn't been
adapting your novel.
910
00:59:50,187 --> 00:59:52,623
Och, that is rubbish.
Look. You're a great writer.
911
00:59:53,758 --> 00:59:55,993
Yeah, you're right.
[ Chuckles ]
912
00:59:56,060 --> 00:59:59,697
- Where's my treatments?
Did you tidy them?
- Willie. Breathe.
913
01:00:06,103 --> 01:00:08,739
How you feeling?
Good.
914
01:00:08,806 --> 01:00:10,841
Sharp?
Sharp, aye.
915
01:00:11,842 --> 01:00:14,244
Rory?
Oh, prime, yeah.
916
01:00:14,311 --> 01:00:17,047
Mind you,
I'm a bit worried
because...
917
01:00:17,114 --> 01:00:19,817
we don't know what
he's gonna ask us.
918
01:00:19,884 --> 01:00:21,585
Well, it's a quiz.
It's a quiz, Rory.
919
01:00:21,652 --> 01:00:23,420
Oh, right, yeah.
[ Door Opens ]
920
01:00:23,487 --> 01:00:26,023
Aye.
[ Tom ]
Mr. L.
921
01:00:26,090 --> 01:00:28,592
Tom. Oh, hey.
Good to see you.
922
01:00:28,659 --> 01:00:30,360
Hey. Good to see you.
923
01:00:30,427 --> 01:00:32,462
Big night, eh?
924
01:00:32,529 --> 01:00:34,732
Big night.
Big night, aye.
This is the final.
925
01:00:34,799 --> 01:00:36,901
The winner gets a holiday
in America...
926
01:00:36,967 --> 01:00:38,769
and two tickets
to Disneyland.
927
01:00:38,836 --> 01:00:41,171
Wow. That's wonderful.
Good luck with that.
928
01:00:41,238 --> 01:00:43,440
Oh, thanks, Tom.
Thanks.
929
01:00:43,507 --> 01:00:46,844
Listen, uh,
I know that Jane and you
haven't always seen eye to eye,
930
01:00:46,911 --> 01:00:50,347
but, uh, I'm sure
she'll be really
happy to see you here.
931
01:00:50,414 --> 01:00:52,316
[ Chuckles ]
Where is she?
932
01:00:52,382 --> 01:00:55,920
Oh, she's not here yet,
but, uh, the quiz
doesn't start until 8:00.
933
01:00:55,986 --> 01:00:59,123
Oh, well, plenty of time then.
934
01:00:59,189 --> 01:01:01,025
Oh, plenty of time.
[ Chuckles ]
935
01:01:01,091 --> 01:01:03,293
[ Horn Honks ]
936
01:01:09,867 --> 01:01:11,802
That was quick.
937
01:01:11,869 --> 01:01:14,171
I wasn't expecting you
for another 10 minutes.
938
01:01:14,238 --> 01:01:17,708
Aye. Well, I was just
round the corner.
Where you going?
939
01:01:17,775 --> 01:01:19,844
East End, please.
The Walter Scott.
[ Engine Starts ]
940
01:01:19,910 --> 01:01:21,712
No problem.
941
01:01:25,115 --> 01:01:27,117
Ta-da!
[ Chuckles ]
942
01:01:27,184 --> 01:01:29,954
- What do you think?
- Lovely.
943
01:01:30,020 --> 01:01:31,889
Me and the lads
discussed it.
944
01:01:31,956 --> 01:01:33,891
We're gonna
make her captain.
945
01:01:33,958 --> 01:01:37,561
When she was a little girl,
every-- every penny
her mother gave her...
946
01:01:37,627 --> 01:01:39,663
she put in the piggy bank,
947
01:01:39,730 --> 01:01:41,999
saving up, you know,
to go to Disneyland.
948
01:01:42,066 --> 01:01:44,168
Every birthday
it was Mickey Mouse,
Mickey Mouse,
949
01:01:44,234 --> 01:01:46,971
Disneyland,
Mickey Mouse, you know.
950
01:01:47,037 --> 01:01:49,039
Every birthday.
951
01:01:50,207 --> 01:01:51,742
Well,
952
01:01:52,810 --> 01:01:55,079
until the seventh birthday.
953
01:02:00,284 --> 01:02:03,653
Her mother took her
to Woolworths
for a present-- a gift--
954
01:02:03,720 --> 01:02:07,291
and, uh, well,
they were late getting back.
955
01:02:09,894 --> 01:02:12,329
I lost it, Tom, you know.
956
01:02:12,396 --> 01:02:15,800
I was,
"Oh, I want my dinner
on the table," and--
957
01:02:20,037 --> 01:02:22,339
That was the night
I walked out on them.
958
01:02:27,111 --> 01:02:29,980
If only that
was the worst thing
I did that night.
959
01:02:33,951 --> 01:02:35,953
Excuse me.
Where are we going?
960
01:02:37,121 --> 01:02:40,124
The Rabbie Burns.
No, I said the Walter Scott.
961
01:02:41,191 --> 01:02:43,794
You sure?
Of course I'm sure.
962
01:02:43,861 --> 01:02:46,396
Hey.
There's no need for that.
963
01:02:46,463 --> 01:02:48,632
They're both iconic pillars
of our national literature,
964
01:02:48,698 --> 01:02:50,901
arguably responsible
for the over-romanticization...
965
01:02:50,968 --> 01:02:54,071
of Scottish history
that persists to this day.
966
01:02:54,138 --> 01:02:56,306
Easy mistake to make.
All right. Please.
967
01:02:56,373 --> 01:02:59,276
Just please hurry.
Please.
968
01:03:02,379 --> 01:03:04,448
[ Benny On Voice Mail ]
Hello.
It's Benny Lockhart here.
969
01:03:04,514 --> 01:03:07,251
If you leave a message,
then I'll get back to you soon.
970
01:03:07,317 --> 01:03:08,919
Okeydokes. Bye.
971
01:03:08,986 --> 01:03:10,855
[ Beeps ]
972
01:03:13,623 --> 01:03:15,759
Do you know why
they were late back?
973
01:03:18,028 --> 01:03:19,429
Yeah.
974
01:03:19,496 --> 01:03:23,167
Yeah, of course you do,
because it's in the book,
isn't it?
975
01:03:27,037 --> 01:03:30,240
Her mother dropped dead
in Woolworths.
976
01:03:31,508 --> 01:03:34,144
Her mother was lying dead
in the pick 'n' mix aisle,
977
01:03:34,211 --> 01:03:35,712
and her...
978
01:03:35,779 --> 01:03:41,418
daddy was spending
her Mickey Mouse money
on booze.
979
01:03:45,990 --> 01:03:48,758
I swore I would never touch
another drop after that.
980
01:03:48,825 --> 01:03:50,895
Not a drop.
981
01:03:57,467 --> 01:03:59,369
You look familiar.
You on the telly?
982
01:03:59,436 --> 01:04:03,073
[ Chuckles ]
Uh, no. I've done
a few interviews, but--
983
01:04:03,140 --> 01:04:05,309
Oh, no, you're that writer,
Jane something.
984
01:04:05,375 --> 01:04:07,644
Aye. My--
My wife read your book.
985
01:04:07,711 --> 01:04:09,413
Oh, yeah?
Aye. What's it called again?
986
01:04:09,479 --> 01:04:11,115
Happy Ending.
Happy Ending, aye.
987
01:04:11,181 --> 01:04:13,417
She was crying
her eyes out by the end.
988
01:04:13,483 --> 01:04:16,386
And you wrote it?
That's amazing.
989
01:04:16,453 --> 01:04:18,755
God, you must be a right
miserable cow.
990
01:04:21,291 --> 01:04:23,460
Do I know you from--
991
01:04:25,295 --> 01:04:27,264
I'm out of fags.
992
01:04:27,998 --> 01:04:29,266
What?
Just a minute.
993
01:04:29,333 --> 01:04:32,236
Hey, no.
Come back!
I need to get to the...
994
01:04:32,302 --> 01:04:34,404
pub.
995
01:04:39,076 --> 01:04:40,677
Hey!
996
01:04:47,017 --> 01:04:49,586
[ Benny ]
Years later,
997
01:04:49,653 --> 01:04:52,556
I discovered that the police
brought her back...
998
01:04:53,523 --> 01:04:55,825
two minutes
after I'd left home.
999
01:04:57,294 --> 01:04:59,096
Two minutes, Tom.
1000
01:05:00,397 --> 01:05:03,467
You know, I realize...
1001
01:05:03,533 --> 01:05:05,702
that I can never
make it up
to that little girl.
1002
01:05:05,769 --> 01:05:08,272
That seven-year-old Jane.
1003
01:05:11,541 --> 01:05:14,144
Can't do it.
1004
01:05:14,211 --> 01:05:17,114
But if we win tonight, Tom--
[ Chuckles ]
1005
01:05:17,181 --> 01:05:19,583
Whoa!
If we win tonight,
1006
01:05:19,649 --> 01:05:22,252
I'm gonna take her
to Disneyland.
[ Chuckles ]
1007
01:05:22,319 --> 01:05:25,022
Aye. I don't mean
the shite one in Paris.
1008
01:05:25,089 --> 01:05:27,857
The real Disneyland.
1009
01:05:27,924 --> 01:05:30,094
No offense.
I know you're French.
1010
01:05:30,160 --> 01:05:32,462
None taken.
1011
01:05:32,529 --> 01:05:38,002
Gentlemen, ladies,
can you please take your places
for the quiz final.
1012
01:05:39,536 --> 01:05:42,872
She'll be here.
She'll be here.
1013
01:05:42,939 --> 01:05:45,409
Nothing's gonna happen.
Not again. No. No.
1014
01:05:49,479 --> 01:05:51,715
Help! Help!
1015
01:06:01,058 --> 01:06:03,860
You know what?
I'll see you in a second.
1016
01:06:05,095 --> 01:06:07,364
[ Cell Phone Rings ]
1017
01:06:09,499 --> 01:06:11,501
- Tom.
- Roddy. Call it off.
1018
01:06:11,568 --> 01:06:13,903
Call it off.
Bring her here immediately.
1019
01:06:13,970 --> 01:06:17,207
She's gone.
[ Panting ]
1020
01:06:17,274 --> 01:06:19,076
We've lost her.
1021
01:06:19,909 --> 01:06:21,878
In Cambuslang.
1022
01:06:27,784 --> 01:06:31,955
- [ Dogs Barking ]
- [ Siren Wailing ]
1023
01:06:46,770 --> 01:06:48,872
[ Horn Honks ]
Sorry!
1024
01:07:01,118 --> 01:07:03,287
[ Quizmaster ]
Captains, last call.
1025
01:07:03,353 --> 01:07:07,157
Can you please
bring your team lists
to the adjudicator's table.
1026
01:07:12,296 --> 01:07:13,797
Benny--
1027
01:07:13,863 --> 01:07:16,300
If I don't get your list,
you'll forfeit your place.
1028
01:07:16,366 --> 01:07:18,802
Benny, come on.
Come on, Benny.
1029
01:07:18,868 --> 01:07:20,704
Two more minutes, lads.
1030
01:07:21,471 --> 01:07:22,739
Oh!
1031
01:07:22,806 --> 01:07:24,274
[ Groans ]
1032
01:07:25,642 --> 01:07:27,277
[ Indistinct ]
1033
01:07:36,986 --> 01:07:38,922
Benny, I'm--
1034
01:07:40,124 --> 01:07:43,193
- I'm sorry.
- It's okay, son.
1035
01:07:43,260 --> 01:07:45,562
- It's not your fault.
- Well, actually--
1036
01:07:45,629 --> 01:07:48,365
Aye. [ Clears Throat ]
Okay. That's enough.
Let's get on with this.
1037
01:07:48,432 --> 01:07:53,303
Welcome, ladies and gentlemen,
to the grand final--
1038
01:07:59,276 --> 01:08:00,477
Dad.
1039
01:08:01,778 --> 01:08:03,079
Dad?
1040
01:08:06,116 --> 01:08:07,984
[ Quizmaster ]
Question one--
1041
01:08:08,051 --> 01:08:12,889
Who was
William Shakespeare's wife?
1042
01:08:12,956 --> 01:08:14,491
Oh!
1043
01:08:15,425 --> 01:08:17,627
The indisputable winners,
1044
01:08:17,694 --> 01:08:19,663
Benny and his Jets!
1045
01:08:19,729 --> 01:08:21,465
[ Cheering ]
1046
01:08:21,531 --> 01:08:24,334
** [ Singing, Indistinct ]
1047
01:08:28,238 --> 01:08:30,307
Whoo!
1048
01:08:30,374 --> 01:08:33,076
[ Cheering ]
1049
01:08:35,545 --> 01:08:37,847
** [ Continues ]
1050
01:08:42,051 --> 01:08:44,053
[ Siren Wailing
In Distance ]
1051
01:08:47,891 --> 01:08:50,594
[ Chattering, Laughing ]
1052
01:08:56,233 --> 01:08:58,235
The fact is...
1053
01:08:59,102 --> 01:09:01,104
we're not dog killers.
1054
01:09:02,372 --> 01:09:05,475
I mean, what's the worst thing
we actually achieved?
1055
01:09:05,542 --> 01:09:07,811
Kidnapping a pot plant.
1056
01:09:10,980 --> 01:09:13,049
There's our fatal flaw.
1057
01:09:14,117 --> 01:09:16,085
At heart,
1058
01:09:17,086 --> 01:09:19,223
we're nice guys.
1059
01:09:24,428 --> 01:09:27,231
I'm going to
tell her everything.
1060
01:09:32,135 --> 01:09:34,638
** [ Humming ]
1061
01:09:37,274 --> 01:09:40,410
I will not do nudity unless
it is essential to the plot.
1062
01:09:44,481 --> 01:09:46,316
[ Doorbell Rings ]
1063
01:09:54,057 --> 01:09:56,760
- Oh, you must be joking.
- Jane?
1064
01:10:00,096 --> 01:10:03,267
Just go away!
I've got to talk to you.
1065
01:10:03,333 --> 01:10:06,102
- Please, open the door.
- [ Phone Rings ]
1066
01:10:07,671 --> 01:10:09,939
Hold on a minute.
1067
01:10:10,006 --> 01:10:11,575
- [ Ringing ]
- Willie?
1068
01:10:11,641 --> 01:10:13,977
[ Man ]
You need to hear about our
great deal on home insurance.
1069
01:10:14,043 --> 01:10:15,945
- [ Tom ]
Jane?
- Your meringues, Jane.
1070
01:10:16,012 --> 01:10:18,348
Have you ever thought
about what would happen
if your house caught fire?
1071
01:10:18,415 --> 01:10:20,750
- Shit! Shit! Shit!
- [ Alarm Beeping ]
1072
01:10:20,817 --> 01:10:23,086
Jane? Are you okay?
Shit! Shit!
1073
01:10:23,152 --> 01:10:25,489
[ Beeping Continues ]
[ Blowing ]
1074
01:10:26,222 --> 01:10:27,957
[ Beeping Continues ]
1075
01:10:28,024 --> 01:10:29,826
[ Jane ]
Piss!
1076
01:10:33,663 --> 01:10:34,764
Shit!
1077
01:10:35,865 --> 01:10:37,767
Oh!
1078
01:10:37,834 --> 01:10:40,236
[ Beeping Continues ]
1079
01:10:41,538 --> 01:10:43,039
Uh, oh--
1080
01:10:43,106 --> 01:10:44,441
Stop looking!
1081
01:10:44,508 --> 01:10:46,310
[ Beeping Continues ]
1082
01:10:47,711 --> 01:10:50,514
[ Beeping Stops ]
1083
01:10:50,580 --> 01:10:52,849
[ Jane ]
What the hell
are you doing here anyway?
1084
01:10:52,916 --> 01:10:56,486
I came to apolo--
Whoa.
1085
01:10:58,655 --> 01:11:00,757
Is that my novel?
1086
01:11:03,360 --> 01:11:06,530
No, no, no, no, no.
Give it back.
Give it back!
1087
01:11:07,364 --> 01:11:09,165
I paid good money for this.
1088
01:11:09,232 --> 01:11:12,769
I'm going to read it.
No, you don't get to read
anything until it's finished.
1089
01:11:15,639 --> 01:11:17,140
Okay.
1090
01:11:18,775 --> 01:11:20,310
Here.
1091
01:11:21,511 --> 01:11:22,846
Thank you.
1092
01:11:22,912 --> 01:11:25,882
Good to know you can behave
like a grown-up once in a--
1093
01:11:25,949 --> 01:11:28,585
Where's the rest of it?
Oh!
[ Door Closes ]
1094
01:11:28,652 --> 01:11:30,554
Hey, come out of there!
1095
01:11:30,620 --> 01:11:33,222
You thieving bastard!
1096
01:11:33,289 --> 01:11:35,892
Give me back my novel!
1097
01:11:47,103 --> 01:11:49,172
How could you do that?
1098
01:11:49,238 --> 01:11:50,907
I can't believe you.
1099
01:11:51,641 --> 01:11:53,142
Even you.
1100
01:11:54,678 --> 01:11:56,580
So, what did you think?
1101
01:11:56,646 --> 01:12:00,850
It's merely the first couple
of chapters, so who can say?
1102
01:12:02,151 --> 01:12:05,455
However,
putting to one side...
1103
01:12:05,522 --> 01:12:08,358
that you're a whining,
overpaid author...
1104
01:12:08,425 --> 01:12:11,094
who clearly got lucky
with her debut,
1105
01:12:12,596 --> 01:12:14,964
I'd say this is
a very good start.
1106
01:12:16,600 --> 01:12:18,702
Well,
1107
01:12:18,768 --> 01:12:22,706
coming from
a never-even-has-been owner of
a third-rate publishing company,
1108
01:12:24,040 --> 01:12:26,042
I'd have to say thank you.
1109
01:12:26,109 --> 01:12:27,744
** [ Pop Ballad ]
* You were *
1110
01:12:27,811 --> 01:12:29,012
Naturally--
1111
01:12:29,078 --> 01:12:31,080
* Built to last a lifetime *
1112
01:12:31,147 --> 01:12:33,783
I have a few notes.
1113
01:12:33,850 --> 01:12:34,951
Naturally.
1114
01:12:35,018 --> 01:12:36,185
* Just not *
1115
01:12:36,252 --> 01:12:38,588
* The life that you live *
1116
01:12:38,655 --> 01:12:41,891
Uh, for instance--
1117
01:12:41,958 --> 01:12:44,093
* You don't have to
make it worse *
1118
01:12:44,160 --> 01:12:47,597
* 'Cause the world
isn't perfect *
1119
01:12:47,664 --> 01:12:51,435
The first page--
I don't get it. There is
something so good about--
1120
01:12:51,501 --> 01:12:53,269
You know, like, uh--
1121
01:12:53,336 --> 01:12:56,473
- [ Laughs ]
- I am. I was up there,
and it's like--
1122
01:12:56,540 --> 01:12:58,174
* You did *
[ Indistinct ]
1123
01:12:58,241 --> 01:13:01,445
* You did *
1124
01:13:01,511 --> 01:13:06,115
* You were
made to be loving *
1125
01:13:09,519 --> 01:13:14,458
* Not a source
of bitterness and hate *
1126
01:13:16,826 --> 01:13:19,195
* And when you turn them
on yourself *
1127
01:13:19,262 --> 01:13:22,932
* You make one more
useless martyr *
1128
01:13:24,634 --> 01:13:26,936
* Make the best
of here and now *
1129
01:13:27,003 --> 01:13:29,973
* Heaven or hell can wait *
1130
01:13:30,039 --> 01:13:33,543
* They'll wait
They'll wait *
1131
01:13:33,610 --> 01:13:37,581
* Let 'em wait *
1132
01:13:37,647 --> 01:13:42,819
* When you lose your appetite
for self-destruction-- **
1133
01:13:42,886 --> 01:13:45,054
[ Phone Rings ]
1134
01:13:45,121 --> 01:13:48,091
I'm just gonna
get the phone.
[ Ringing Continues ]
1135
01:13:48,157 --> 01:13:49,926
Just one second.
Willie?
1136
01:13:49,993 --> 01:13:52,028
Hi, Janey.
Hi.
1137
01:13:52,095 --> 01:13:54,397
So how's the trip going?
Did you meet Soderbergh?
1138
01:13:54,464 --> 01:13:56,299
There was no meeting.
1139
01:13:56,365 --> 01:13:59,402
I've been stuck
in the ass end of nowhere.
1140
01:13:59,469 --> 01:14:02,105
Couldn't get a cab.
I've been walking
for nine hours in the rain.
1141
01:14:02,171 --> 01:14:04,841
My phone died.
I've only just now
found a phone.
1142
01:14:04,908 --> 01:14:06,309
Oh, Willie.
1143
01:14:06,375 --> 01:14:09,278
I'm cold and wet,
and I'm feeling so--
1144
01:14:09,345 --> 01:14:11,014
so miserable.
1145
01:14:11,080 --> 01:14:14,017
You know,
the funny thing is,
1146
01:14:14,083 --> 01:14:16,853
even though the trip
turned out so badly--
1147
01:14:16,920 --> 01:14:20,289
You know, it made me
realize a few things.
1148
01:14:22,792 --> 01:14:24,728
I miss you, Janey.
1149
01:14:26,195 --> 01:14:28,732
You're the best thing
in my life, and...
1150
01:14:31,400 --> 01:14:33,469
I love you.
1151
01:14:34,303 --> 01:14:37,607
Janey, let's get married.
1152
01:14:44,648 --> 01:14:47,884
** [ Acoustic Guitar Ballad ]
1153
01:15:03,232 --> 01:15:05,602
[ Woman ]
* So many days *
1154
01:15:05,669 --> 01:15:08,972
* So many nights I cried *
1155
01:15:11,474 --> 01:15:18,214
* They're written
in these words,
everything I feel inside *
1156
01:15:19,816 --> 01:15:22,385
Okay. All right.
1157
01:15:23,219 --> 01:15:25,722
Oh.
There we go.
1158
01:15:25,789 --> 01:15:27,791
[ Typing ]
1159
01:15:33,630 --> 01:15:37,567
- He's sick.
- Oh, come on. He's just
taking the piss now.
1160
01:15:37,634 --> 01:15:39,302
He said he loves me.
1161
01:15:40,436 --> 01:15:43,206
- You heard him.
- Actually, I didn't.
1162
01:15:43,272 --> 01:15:45,742
Maybe it was in
your vivid imagination.
1163
01:15:45,809 --> 01:15:50,614
And I love Willie too.
He makes me... happy.
1164
01:15:50,680 --> 01:15:53,650
[ Willie ]
Any chance
of that cup of tea, doll?
1165
01:15:55,518 --> 01:15:58,354
Oh, he's a sweetheart.
1166
01:16:03,159 --> 01:16:05,461
* How can I be loved *
1167
01:16:05,528 --> 01:16:10,667
* If I never give my heart? *
1168
01:16:11,500 --> 01:16:13,937
* So all along the way *
1169
01:16:14,003 --> 01:16:17,707
* Picking up the pieces *
1170
01:16:17,774 --> 01:16:21,044
* Of the past *
1171
01:16:21,110 --> 01:16:22,545
Priscilla?
1172
01:16:22,612 --> 01:16:26,616
Listen, sweetheart.
Get out the big pen.
1173
01:16:26,683 --> 01:16:29,485
It's time to bill the bastards
for my first draft.
1174
01:16:29,552 --> 01:16:32,756
I just finished the script.
1175
01:16:40,429 --> 01:16:43,199
A lifetime with Willie Scott.
1176
01:16:44,968 --> 01:16:48,571
If that doesn't
make her miserable,
nothing will.
1177
01:16:48,638 --> 01:16:52,575
Look. I know things
haven't worked out
for the two of you, but...
1178
01:16:52,642 --> 01:16:55,544
surely you don't really,
actually,
1179
01:16:55,611 --> 01:16:58,547
totally, completely
want her to be unhappy?
1180
01:16:58,614 --> 01:17:01,885
Of course I don't.
I mean,
1181
01:17:01,951 --> 01:17:03,920
Oh--
[ French ]
1182
01:17:03,987 --> 01:17:05,689
It's tricky, okay?
Whatever.
1183
01:17:05,755 --> 01:17:09,759
* Ever since
you tore my world *
1184
01:17:09,826 --> 01:17:14,230
* I fell apart *
1185
01:17:14,297 --> 01:17:18,334
* And rescue me *
1186
01:17:18,401 --> 01:17:20,670
* From this dream *
1187
01:17:20,737 --> 01:17:22,538
* 'Cause this is not another *
1188
01:17:22,605 --> 01:17:25,108
* Happy ending **
1189
01:17:25,174 --> 01:17:27,176
Which is why Shakespeare...
1190
01:17:27,243 --> 01:17:31,080
never left New York again.
1191
01:17:31,147 --> 01:17:36,585
- [ Cell Phone Buzzing ]
- Okay, um, chapter 21.
1192
01:17:36,652 --> 01:17:40,523
Uh, read it or...
be punished.
1193
01:17:40,589 --> 01:17:43,259
- Yo.
- He's only gone
and changed the ending.
1194
01:17:43,326 --> 01:17:47,230
Wow. All you did was change
her title, and she thought
you were a complete wanker.
1195
01:17:47,296 --> 01:17:50,734
That's "Juan Kerr."
1196
01:17:50,800 --> 01:17:53,469
He was a 19th century
South American revolutionary.
1197
01:17:54,603 --> 01:17:56,472
This is gonna
break her heart.
1198
01:17:56,539 --> 01:17:58,274
Yeah, well, great.
1199
01:17:58,341 --> 01:18:02,478
Now all you gotta do
is make sure she reads it.
Mission accomplished.
1200
01:18:02,545 --> 01:18:04,047
Yeah.
1201
01:18:06,716 --> 01:18:08,317
You've given it a happy ending.
1202
01:18:10,219 --> 01:18:13,757
- And your point?
- The point is Jane's novel
doesn't end happily.
1203
01:18:13,823 --> 01:18:16,893
Well, who the hell
wants to walk out of a movie
feeling miserable?
1204
01:18:16,960 --> 01:18:19,095
You have to change it back.
Oh, I don't think so.
1205
01:18:19,162 --> 01:18:23,299
That script says more
about my love for her than
I could ever put into words.
1206
01:18:23,366 --> 01:18:26,803
- She doesn't know yet,
does she?
- [ Chuckles ]
1207
01:18:28,204 --> 01:18:30,740
Do you have any idea
what this will do to her?
1208
01:18:30,807 --> 01:18:32,441
To both of you?
1209
01:18:32,508 --> 01:18:35,845
I made a mistake,
and I can't take it back.
1210
01:18:35,912 --> 01:18:38,948
But, Willie,
if you truly love her,
1211
01:18:39,015 --> 01:18:41,084
change it.
1212
01:18:41,150 --> 01:18:44,120
What's going on here?
You just don't get her,
do you?
1213
01:18:44,187 --> 01:18:46,455
Oh, I get her all right.
1214
01:18:47,290 --> 01:18:49,759
Every night I get her.
1215
01:18:50,827 --> 01:18:52,962
Any way up I fancy.
1216
01:18:56,933 --> 01:18:58,968
Hit a sick man, would you?
1217
01:18:59,035 --> 01:19:00,403
Huh?
1218
01:19:00,469 --> 01:19:02,138
Watch this. Whoa.
Oh!
1219
01:19:02,205 --> 01:19:04,107
Oh, oh, oh.
[ Shouts ]
1220
01:19:04,173 --> 01:19:05,474
[ Thudding ]
1221
01:19:11,815 --> 01:19:14,183
Remind me,
does the bridge explode
in the novel?
1222
01:19:14,250 --> 01:19:16,352
[ Door Opens ]
1223
01:19:16,419 --> 01:19:19,956
[ Door Closes ]
Hi, Janey, I'm home.
1224
01:19:20,023 --> 01:19:23,359
[ Coughs ]
Any chance of
a wee cup of tea?
1225
01:19:25,962 --> 01:19:27,797
Willie!
1226
01:19:27,864 --> 01:19:30,900
I just don't understand
how you can do this
over a dumb ending.
1227
01:19:30,967 --> 01:19:34,437
- No. No, you don't.
- Well, if it's any
consolation, Janey,
1228
01:19:34,503 --> 01:19:36,705
I don't think me and you
would have worked out anyway.
1229
01:19:36,772 --> 01:19:39,943
- Oh.
- I just don't get all that...
1230
01:19:40,009 --> 01:19:42,345
worshipping your pain stuff.
1231
01:19:46,482 --> 01:19:48,717
Daddy issues.
1232
01:19:58,327 --> 01:20:03,199
** [ Ballad ]
[ Woman ] * I guess it's funnier
from where you're standing *
1233
01:20:07,904 --> 01:20:11,607
* 'Cause from over here
I missed the joke *
1234
01:20:15,879 --> 01:20:20,416
* Clear the way
for my crash landing *
1235
01:20:21,484 --> 01:20:24,053
* I've done it again *
1236
01:20:24,120 --> 01:20:28,024
* Another number
for your notes *
1237
01:20:32,061 --> 01:20:35,764
* I'd be smiling
if I wasn't so desperate *
1238
01:20:39,568 --> 01:20:43,139
* I'd be patient
if I had the time *
1239
01:20:46,943 --> 01:20:52,015
* I could stop and answer
all of your questions *
1240
01:20:52,081 --> 01:20:54,083
* As soon as I find out *
1241
01:20:54,150 --> 01:20:58,321
* How I can move
from the back of the line *
1242
01:20:59,989 --> 01:21:03,492
* I'll be your clown *
1243
01:21:03,559 --> 01:21:06,996
* Behind the glass *
1244
01:21:07,063 --> 01:21:09,598
* Go ahead and laugh *
1245
01:21:09,665 --> 01:21:11,334
* 'Cause it's funny *
1246
01:21:11,400 --> 01:21:15,038
* I would too,
if I saw me *
1247
01:21:15,104 --> 01:21:17,941
* I'll be your clown *
1248
01:21:18,007 --> 01:21:21,044
* On your favorite channel *
1249
01:21:22,178 --> 01:21:25,514
* My life's a circus, circus *
1250
01:21:25,581 --> 01:21:27,350
* Round in circles *
1251
01:21:27,416 --> 01:21:31,054
* I'm selling out tonight **
1252
01:21:33,122 --> 01:21:35,158
[ Coughing ]
1253
01:21:35,224 --> 01:21:38,694
Tom, if she hasn't delivered,
you have to take
Pandemic Media's offer.
1254
01:21:38,761 --> 01:21:42,498
Mark my words,
never going to happen.
1255
01:21:42,565 --> 01:21:46,102
Well, I'll have no option
but to declare you bankrupt
and call in a receiver.
1256
01:21:46,169 --> 01:21:49,338
[ Groans, Coughs ]
1257
01:21:55,144 --> 01:21:57,513
You're my relationship manager,
right?
1258
01:21:57,580 --> 01:21:59,282
Yeah. So?
1259
01:21:59,348 --> 01:22:01,951
So what should I do
about my relationship?
1260
01:22:02,018 --> 01:22:04,220
Oh, for God's sake.
1261
01:22:07,056 --> 01:22:09,025
Do you love her?
1262
01:22:09,092 --> 01:22:10,693
Tom?
1263
01:22:12,295 --> 01:22:13,796
[ Door Opens ]
1264
01:22:14,863 --> 01:22:16,365
[ Door Closes ]
1265
01:22:25,941 --> 01:22:28,077
Jane.
Hi.
1266
01:22:28,144 --> 01:22:29,845
Tom's not here.
1267
01:22:29,912 --> 01:22:32,248
He should be back any minute
if you want to wait.
1268
01:22:32,315 --> 01:22:36,052
No, I don't think so.
I'm heading off
for a bit of a break.
1269
01:22:37,353 --> 01:22:39,288
I just came to drop this off.
1270
01:22:39,355 --> 01:22:41,390
It's my new novel.
I finished it.
1271
01:22:41,457 --> 01:22:42,992
Oh!
Yea!
1272
01:22:43,059 --> 01:22:44,893
That's a relief.
Between you and me,
1273
01:22:44,960 --> 01:22:47,496
your book's the only thing
stopping this place
from going tits up.
1274
01:22:48,631 --> 01:22:50,166
[ Roddy Sighs ]
1275
01:22:53,369 --> 01:22:56,005
So where shall I leave it?
Um--
1276
01:22:57,006 --> 01:22:58,774
Just put it on his desk.
1277
01:22:58,841 --> 01:23:00,309
Okay.
1278
01:23:00,376 --> 01:23:01,877
Bye.
1279
01:23:11,854 --> 01:23:13,856
[ Sighs ]
1280
01:23:22,365 --> 01:23:24,367
I don't know what to do.
1281
01:23:25,968 --> 01:23:28,704
Hold it. Jane.
1282
01:23:29,272 --> 01:23:30,273
Jane!
1283
01:23:31,640 --> 01:23:33,976
[ Shouts ]
Bastard!
1284
01:24:01,770 --> 01:24:03,539
[ Groans ]
1285
01:24:09,078 --> 01:24:11,947
No, I--
I shouldn't still
be seeing you.
1286
01:24:12,014 --> 01:24:14,016
I finished it.
1287
01:24:37,740 --> 01:24:41,477
Leave me alone.
All I want is to be alone!
1288
01:24:44,847 --> 01:24:47,483
[ Sheep Bleating ]
1289
01:25:01,130 --> 01:25:03,232
[ Car Approaching ]
1290
01:25:33,762 --> 01:25:35,231
Jane.
1291
01:25:35,831 --> 01:25:37,333
Jane!
1292
01:25:43,372 --> 01:25:46,642
Listen.
I know you're in there.
1293
01:25:46,709 --> 01:25:50,012
And I know it sounds crazy,
but I was trying to help.
1294
01:25:52,080 --> 01:25:54,250
Jane.
1295
01:25:54,317 --> 01:25:56,852
Your dad's worried about you,
and so am I.
1296
01:25:56,919 --> 01:25:59,488
He told me where to find you.
1297
01:26:01,524 --> 01:26:04,927
All you care about
is what my book can do
for your damn company.
1298
01:26:04,993 --> 01:26:07,296
Well, you got
what you wanted.
1299
01:26:18,807 --> 01:26:20,276
[ Car Door Opens ]
1300
01:26:34,122 --> 01:26:36,191
Jane, please,
open the door.
1301
01:26:40,128 --> 01:26:43,198
Jane, I'm not good
at this countryside stuff.
1302
01:26:43,266 --> 01:26:44,767
All right?
1303
01:26:46,935 --> 01:26:48,737
I think I saw a bear.
1304
01:26:48,804 --> 01:26:50,439
[ Mouths Word ]
1305
01:26:50,506 --> 01:26:52,241
Jane.
1306
01:26:59,582 --> 01:27:01,183
I'm sorry.
1307
01:27:25,541 --> 01:27:27,510
Thanks a lot.
1308
01:27:28,877 --> 01:27:30,379
[ Chuckles ]
1309
01:27:32,381 --> 01:27:35,751
I deserve that.
I'll just go, shall I?
1310
01:27:37,152 --> 01:27:39,355
I'll go.
1311
01:27:39,422 --> 01:27:41,390
** [ Acoustic Guitar Ballad ]
1312
01:27:44,126 --> 01:27:46,595
[ Man ]
* Crash land *
1313
01:27:46,662 --> 01:27:49,332
* Still I can't find you *
1314
01:27:49,398 --> 01:27:52,435
* And just as things
were looking up *
1315
01:27:53,268 --> 01:27:55,938
* We're stuck *
1316
01:27:56,004 --> 01:27:58,407
* Don't panic *
1317
01:27:58,474 --> 01:28:00,576
* Because I'm left
without food *
1318
01:28:00,643 --> 01:28:01,910
[ Engine Sputtering ]
1319
01:28:01,977 --> 01:28:04,913
* And just as things
were heating up *
1320
01:28:04,980 --> 01:28:06,849
* I should have told you
that you're good enough *
1321
01:28:06,915 --> 01:28:08,751
[ Engine Sputtering ]
1322
01:28:08,817 --> 01:28:11,086
* Because I'm stuck here
on this island *
1323
01:28:11,153 --> 01:28:12,721
[ Grunting ]
1324
01:28:12,788 --> 01:28:14,557
* And I've lost her
all over again *
1325
01:28:14,623 --> 01:28:17,059
* Nothing gets better
than memories *
1326
01:28:17,125 --> 01:28:20,729
* When all you have
are memories for friends *
1327
01:28:20,796 --> 01:28:24,099
* I went searching
when the lights went out *
1328
01:28:24,166 --> 01:28:27,703
Putain! Merde!
[ Shouting In French ]
1329
01:28:27,770 --> 01:28:29,705
Merde!
1330
01:28:29,772 --> 01:28:31,707
* When my flight went down *
1331
01:28:31,774 --> 01:28:34,843
* 'Cause I made a rope *
1332
01:28:34,910 --> 01:28:37,079
* Can I throw it out to you? *
1333
01:28:37,145 --> 01:28:38,414
[ Shouts ]
1334
01:28:38,481 --> 01:28:41,384
* You drag me back home
I deserve to be rescued *
1335
01:28:41,450 --> 01:28:43,752
[ Shouting In French ]
1336
01:28:45,153 --> 01:28:47,390
* But still
I have trouble with *
1337
01:28:47,456 --> 01:28:49,925
* Most days and nights *
1338
01:28:49,992 --> 01:28:55,130
* But still I have trouble
with moving my life outside *
1339
01:28:55,197 --> 01:28:58,033
[ Muttering In French ]
1340
01:28:58,100 --> 01:28:59,602
[ Shouts ]
1341
01:28:59,668 --> 01:29:03,038
* Still I can't find you *
1342
01:29:03,105 --> 01:29:06,709
* And just as things
were looking up *
1343
01:29:06,775 --> 01:29:08,844
* We're fucked *
1344
01:29:09,912 --> 01:29:12,314
* Don't panic *
1345
01:29:12,381 --> 01:29:15,250
* Because there's nothing here
to fear *
1346
01:29:15,317 --> 01:29:18,353
* And just don't lose
imagination *
1347
01:29:19,455 --> 01:29:21,189
* Or luck *
1348
01:29:21,256 --> 01:29:23,225
* 'Cause I made a rope *
1349
01:29:23,291 --> 01:29:24,326
[ Coughing ]
1350
01:29:24,393 --> 01:29:27,229
* Can I throw it out to you? *
1351
01:29:27,295 --> 01:29:29,297
* You drag me back home *
1352
01:29:29,364 --> 01:29:31,133
* I deserve to be rescued **
1353
01:29:31,199 --> 01:29:34,302
[ Tom Coughing ]
[ Jane ] It's eight miles
to the nearest village.
1354
01:29:36,038 --> 01:29:38,373
I don't expect to see you
when I wake up.
1355
01:29:40,075 --> 01:29:43,746
Good night.
[ Coughs, Sniffles ]
1356
01:29:47,382 --> 01:29:48,917
[ Jane ]
Oh!
1357
01:29:48,984 --> 01:29:52,054
What the hell
were you thinking?
About the plant?
1358
01:29:52,120 --> 01:29:53,956
No, about me, you idiot.
1359
01:29:56,659 --> 01:29:58,360
Here's the thing.
1360
01:29:58,427 --> 01:30:01,864
You go to some dark places
when you write.
1361
01:30:01,930 --> 01:30:04,332
You bring out stuff most people
prefer to keep locked up.
1362
01:30:04,399 --> 01:30:06,301
So I thought maybe
if I made you miserable--
1363
01:30:06,368 --> 01:30:09,304
I'd be able
to finish my novel?
Well, that's genius.
1364
01:30:09,371 --> 01:30:11,774
- Yeah, well, I was wrong.
- Of course you were wrong.
1365
01:30:11,840 --> 01:30:15,110
You don't have to be
miserable to write. You do it
because you have to.
1366
01:30:15,177 --> 01:30:18,981
Because it gnaws away
at your insides
if you try to ignore it.
1367
01:30:19,047 --> 01:30:22,117
Because if you don't write,
then you might as well be dead.
1368
01:30:22,184 --> 01:30:26,288
And what do you mean
you were wrong? You got
the novel, didn't you?
1369
01:30:26,354 --> 01:30:30,058
In Tom and Roddy world
the plan was a roaring success.
Not exactly.
1370
01:30:31,226 --> 01:30:33,328
The last chapter--
it doesn't work.
1371
01:30:34,229 --> 01:30:35,998
It needs a rewrite.
1372
01:30:38,601 --> 01:30:41,136
- How much of it?
- All of it.
1373
01:30:47,275 --> 01:30:49,277
You all right?
1374
01:30:50,045 --> 01:30:51,580
No.
1375
01:30:51,647 --> 01:30:54,216
I'm bloody not all right,
and I want more chocolate.
1376
01:30:58,053 --> 01:31:00,155
Maybe--
[ Coughs ]
1377
01:31:00,222 --> 01:31:02,424
it would help
if we talked it through.
1378
01:31:03,959 --> 01:31:05,894
What have I missed?
1379
01:31:11,066 --> 01:31:16,371
I think the problem might be
that you don't really get to
choose your ending.
1380
01:31:16,438 --> 01:31:20,142
It has to follow naturally
from what comes before,
or it doesn't feel true.
1381
01:31:20,208 --> 01:31:22,678
Oh, he's so insightful.
I want to start with Darsie.
1382
01:31:22,745 --> 01:31:23,846
Mmm. Goody.
1383
01:31:23,912 --> 01:31:25,848
I don't understand her.
No kidding.
1384
01:31:25,914 --> 01:31:30,619
I mean, why is she in love
with a man who betrays her
so utterly?
1385
01:31:30,686 --> 01:31:32,387
He's emotionally crippled,
1386
01:31:32,454 --> 01:31:35,057
has an uncomfortable tendency
for mean-spiritedness--
1387
01:31:35,123 --> 01:31:38,193
He has nice... hair.
1388
01:31:38,260 --> 01:31:39,828
[ Mutters ]
1389
01:31:44,733 --> 01:31:46,769
Okay, so, yes.
1390
01:31:46,835 --> 01:31:48,804
Maybe there is an element
of autobiography.
1391
01:31:48,871 --> 01:31:51,373
Which means you're
the reason I can't write.
Me?
1392
01:31:51,439 --> 01:31:55,744
At some point
during the last few weeks
it dawned on me that...
1393
01:31:55,811 --> 01:31:58,113
when I finished this novel,
we were finished too.
1394
01:31:58,180 --> 01:32:02,951
And some insane part of me
doesn't want that to happen.
1395
01:32:04,753 --> 01:32:07,690
You're my block, Tom.
But I want you to finish it.
1396
01:32:07,756 --> 01:32:10,993
Yeah, of course you want me
to finish it. For what?
So you can turn a profit.
1397
01:32:11,059 --> 01:32:13,061
I've sold it.
1398
01:32:13,796 --> 01:32:15,463
What?
1399
01:32:16,364 --> 01:32:18,166
I've sold the business.
1400
01:32:18,233 --> 01:32:20,569
No, you can't have sold it.
1401
01:32:20,636 --> 01:32:22,738
That stupid company is you.
1402
01:32:24,907 --> 01:32:27,442
Get it back.
You can't do this to me.
1403
01:32:27,509 --> 01:32:30,245
I'm on the moral
high ground here,
and I'm not getting off now.
1404
01:32:34,216 --> 01:32:36,619
- You sold it?
- Yeah.
1405
01:32:43,391 --> 01:32:47,930
And you can take all the time
you need for the last chapter.
I made it part of the deal.
1406
01:32:49,164 --> 01:32:51,099
Uh, Tom--
1407
01:32:52,601 --> 01:32:54,536
I didn't sign.
1408
01:32:55,871 --> 01:32:57,773
With Klinsch & McLeish.
I couldn't do it.
1409
01:32:57,840 --> 01:32:59,942
Jane, I've spoken to
my relationship manager--
1410
01:33:00,008 --> 01:33:02,678
If I hear the words "sad,"
"beautiful" or "music,"
1411
01:33:02,745 --> 01:33:04,379
you're a dead man.
1412
01:33:04,446 --> 01:33:06,649
Apparently...
1413
01:33:06,715 --> 01:33:08,917
I block you.
1414
01:33:08,984 --> 01:33:10,719
And I block you too.
1415
01:33:16,959 --> 01:33:21,229
- Mmm!
- What? What could possibly
be more important?
1416
01:33:22,464 --> 01:33:25,701
I know how it ends.
I'm just gonna
get my laptop.
1417
01:33:27,202 --> 01:33:29,204
I don't care.
1418
01:33:36,879 --> 01:33:39,614
Mmm. You are on fire.
1419
01:33:39,682 --> 01:33:41,817
You're pretty hot yourself,
baby.
1420
01:33:41,884 --> 01:33:43,618
[ Chuckles ]
1421
01:33:46,021 --> 01:33:48,423
Uh, Tom?
1422
01:33:48,490 --> 01:33:50,525
Tom, what are you doing?
1423
01:33:50,592 --> 01:33:52,494
Tom? Oh, my God. Tom!
1424
01:33:52,560 --> 01:33:54,096
Oh.
1425
01:33:58,834 --> 01:34:00,268
Tom?
1426
01:34:00,903 --> 01:34:02,570
Tom!
1427
01:34:08,110 --> 01:34:12,614
[ Jane ]
Why is it that the saddest
endings always seem the truest?
1428
01:34:12,681 --> 01:34:16,351
In the stories I told myself,
I was always the heroine,
1429
01:34:16,418 --> 01:34:18,987
always reaching
for my happy ending.
1430
01:34:22,624 --> 01:34:24,927
It didn't turn out that way.
1431
01:34:24,993 --> 01:34:28,163
I won't get to spend
the rest of my life with him.
1432
01:34:29,832 --> 01:34:31,834
But I was loved.
1433
01:34:33,268 --> 01:34:35,270
And that's enough.
1434
01:34:38,673 --> 01:34:40,809
[ Man Clears Throat ]
1435
01:34:47,015 --> 01:34:48,784
Ladies and gentlemen,
1436
01:34:48,851 --> 01:34:51,686
Jane Lockhart will now
be signing copies...
1437
01:34:51,754 --> 01:34:53,488
of her chart-topping
new novel,
1438
01:34:53,555 --> 01:34:55,924
You'll Catch Your Death.
1439
01:34:58,326 --> 01:35:01,129
[ Chattering ]
1440
01:35:08,570 --> 01:35:10,438
Whoa.
1441
01:35:10,505 --> 01:35:13,041
[ Jane ]
Well, Darsie,
back where you belong.
1442
01:35:13,108 --> 01:35:15,543
Are you actually
talking to your book?
1443
01:35:16,578 --> 01:35:18,480
You don't think
it's all a bit tacky?
1444
01:35:18,546 --> 01:35:20,482
Tacky?
We have canapés.
1445
01:35:20,548 --> 01:35:23,085
Now get signing.
[ Chuckles ]
1446
01:35:27,589 --> 01:35:29,892
Right, you ready?
Go on. Just do it.
1447
01:35:29,958 --> 01:35:32,828
Okay, pay attention, class.
Pay attention!
1448
01:35:36,431 --> 01:35:38,901
Jane Lockhart, of course,
1449
01:35:38,967 --> 01:35:40,803
follows Charlotte Brontë...
1450
01:35:40,869 --> 01:35:43,738
as only the second writer
in English...
1451
01:35:43,806 --> 01:35:47,542
to design and build
her own hovercraft.
1452
01:35:47,609 --> 01:35:49,277
Hovercraft.
1453
01:35:49,344 --> 01:35:53,281
H-O-V-E-R-C-R-A-F-T.
1454
01:35:53,348 --> 01:35:56,451
See? They believe
anything you tell them.
1455
01:35:59,221 --> 01:36:05,460
So, I thought you said
that the Pandemic Media people
were coming today.
1456
01:36:06,561 --> 01:36:08,530
Where are they?
You're looking at them.
1457
01:36:08,596 --> 01:36:10,132
What do you mean?
1458
01:36:10,198 --> 01:36:11,967
They want someone
in the company...
1459
01:36:12,034 --> 01:36:14,736
who won't let you get away
with your usual extravagance.
1460
01:36:14,803 --> 01:36:16,771
Someone hard-line.
1461
01:36:17,405 --> 01:36:19,942
Someone disciplined.
1462
01:36:20,008 --> 01:36:22,811
[ Chuckles ]
Ah!
1463
01:36:22,878 --> 01:36:24,346
Cheers.
Brilliant.
1464
01:36:25,613 --> 01:36:27,682
Cheers. Thank you.
Thank you.
1465
01:36:30,953 --> 01:36:33,221
You read it.
Yeah.
1466
01:36:34,156 --> 01:36:36,358
Her father
was really bad to her.
1467
01:36:36,424 --> 01:36:38,927
A nasty piece of work.
No. No, no, no.
He wasn't nas--
1468
01:36:38,994 --> 01:36:40,929
But...
1469
01:36:40,996 --> 01:36:42,697
she forgives him in the end.
1470
01:36:48,971 --> 01:36:51,006
[ Chuckles ]
Mr. L.!
1471
01:36:51,073 --> 01:36:54,910
[ Chuckles ]
Oh, if you think
that was bad,
1472
01:36:54,977 --> 01:36:58,513
wait till you see
what she's done with you
in the new one. [ Chuckles ]
1473
01:37:02,450 --> 01:37:04,652
Yeah. Um--
1474
01:37:04,719 --> 01:37:08,623
Mr. Lockhart-- Benny--
would you give us a second?
1475
01:37:11,093 --> 01:37:13,061
Yeah. Yeah, sure.
Thanks.
1476
01:37:22,470 --> 01:37:24,806
[ Sighs ]
1477
01:37:29,444 --> 01:37:31,479
- So--
- Mm-hmm?
1478
01:37:33,115 --> 01:37:34,349
- Look--
- Yes?
1479
01:37:34,416 --> 01:37:36,118
You are, frankly,
1480
01:37:36,184 --> 01:37:38,320
about the most infuriating
person I've ever met,
1481
01:37:38,386 --> 01:37:43,491
which considering I work
in Scottish publishing,
is saying something.
1482
01:37:45,560 --> 01:37:48,230
But we couldn't have
got here without each other.
1483
01:37:51,033 --> 01:37:53,936
So, Jane, what I'm saying is...
1484
01:37:54,002 --> 01:37:56,238
will you--
1485
01:37:57,539 --> 01:37:59,374
Could you--
1486
01:37:59,441 --> 01:38:02,777
Is that a contract?
Two more books
and an option for a third.
1487
01:38:02,844 --> 01:38:06,915
Exclusive?
Naturally we'd have to work
very, very, very closely.
1488
01:38:06,982 --> 01:38:09,651
With lots of notes?
An excessive amount of notes.
1489
01:38:09,717 --> 01:38:11,753
Okay, I do.
1490
01:38:12,988 --> 01:38:15,090
I mean--
I mean, I will.
1491
01:38:15,157 --> 01:38:18,626
I will. I meant--
Uh, uh, um--
1492
01:38:18,693 --> 01:38:20,695
Okay, just give it here.
1493
01:38:20,762 --> 01:38:22,764
** [ Ballad ]
1494
01:38:27,802 --> 01:38:31,639
[ Woman ]
* Everywhere in the air *
1495
01:38:31,706 --> 01:38:35,210
* I feel you *
1496
01:38:35,277 --> 01:38:38,513
* With every step
and every breath *
1497
01:38:38,580 --> 01:38:42,517
* I'm closer to you *
1498
01:38:42,584 --> 01:38:46,454
* When we're together *
1499
01:38:46,521 --> 01:38:49,891
* Light as a feather *
1500
01:38:49,958 --> 01:38:51,926
* I fall *
1501
01:38:51,994 --> 01:38:56,364
* Fall for you *
1502
01:38:57,099 --> 01:38:59,434
* And I fall *
1503
01:38:59,501 --> 01:39:04,239
* Fall for you *
1504
01:39:05,340 --> 01:39:08,843
* Every day,
in every way *
1505
01:39:08,910 --> 01:39:12,714
* I'm floating on air *
1506
01:39:12,780 --> 01:39:16,584
* Don't wake me up
Let me dream *
1507
01:39:16,651 --> 01:39:20,022
* Come take me there *
1508
01:39:20,088 --> 01:39:24,226
* So close together *
1509
01:39:24,292 --> 01:39:27,362
* Light as a feather *
1510
01:39:27,429 --> 01:39:29,497
* I fall *
1511
01:39:29,564 --> 01:39:34,836
* Fall for you *
1512
01:39:34,902 --> 01:39:36,904
* I fall *
1513
01:39:36,971 --> 01:39:42,644
* Fall for you *
1514
01:39:42,710 --> 01:39:46,481
* Oh, catch me
I want to *
1515
01:39:46,548 --> 01:39:50,018
* Let myself go *
1516
01:39:50,085 --> 01:39:53,755
* Come alive with emotion *
1517
01:39:53,821 --> 01:39:57,625
* From my head to my toes *
1518
01:39:57,692 --> 01:40:01,396
* Oh, deep down inside me *
1519
01:40:01,463 --> 01:40:05,267
* I already know *
1520
01:40:05,333 --> 01:40:09,071
* When we're together *
1521
01:40:09,137 --> 01:40:12,474
* Light as a feather *
1522
01:40:12,540 --> 01:40:14,609
* I fall *
1523
01:40:14,676 --> 01:40:18,946
* Fall for you *
1524
01:40:20,182 --> 01:40:23,951
* For every kiss
I reminisce *
1525
01:40:24,018 --> 01:40:27,589
* The touch of your skin *
1526
01:40:27,655 --> 01:40:31,593
* So hold me tight
Don't let me go *
1527
01:40:31,659 --> 01:40:35,097
* Come take me in *
1528
01:40:35,163 --> 01:40:39,167
* So close together *
1529
01:40:39,234 --> 01:40:42,504
* Light as a feather *
1530
01:40:42,570 --> 01:40:44,606
* I fall *
1531
01:40:44,672 --> 01:40:48,543
* Fall for you *
1532
01:40:49,777 --> 01:40:52,114
* I fall *
1533
01:40:52,180 --> 01:40:56,651
* Fall for you *
1534
01:40:58,052 --> 01:41:01,456
* Catch me
I wanna *
1535
01:41:01,523 --> 01:41:05,227
* Let myself go *
1536
01:41:05,293 --> 01:41:08,963
* Come alive with emotion *
1537
01:41:09,030 --> 01:41:12,434
* From my head to my toes **
1538
01:41:12,500 --> 01:41:14,636
This is really pathetic.
1539
01:41:15,370 --> 01:41:17,205
Who is this?
1540
01:41:17,272 --> 01:41:18,773
Jimmy Miller.
1541
01:41:18,840 --> 01:41:20,842
Should have known.
1542
01:41:22,544 --> 01:41:24,646
100 pages
of the bullshit.
1543
01:41:24,712 --> 01:41:26,681
100 pages.
1544
01:41:26,748 --> 01:41:28,583
I'm not even gonna read his.
1545
01:41:28,650 --> 01:41:31,153
Caitlin doesn't turn up
most of the time.
1546
01:41:31,219 --> 01:41:33,188
Hasn't even put his name
on the front cover.
1547
01:41:33,255 --> 01:41:36,991
Who is this meant to be?
Well, I can tell by his
handwriting it's Paul's.
1548
01:41:37,058 --> 01:41:40,762
And if Paul thinks he can just
draw pictures and I'll know
what he's trying to say,
1549
01:41:40,828 --> 01:41:42,497
he's got another
thing coming.
1550
01:41:42,564 --> 01:41:45,500
They're all the same,
aren't they?
Shona Westwood.
1551
01:41:45,567 --> 01:41:47,502
What does she want?
1552
01:41:47,569 --> 01:41:50,805
There's nothing in this,
is there? Hasn't even
bothered to do it.
1553
01:41:50,872 --> 01:41:52,874
[ Crew Members Laughing ]
1554
01:41:52,940 --> 01:41:54,476
[ Roddy Chuckles ]
107434